The Basement Yard - #501 - Getting Fined At Dinner

Episode Date: May 5, 2025

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welcome back to the welcome back to the welcome back to the welcome back to the welcome back to the basement yard slick back frank welcome back to the basement yard slick back frank welcome back to the basement yard slick back frank welcome back to the basement yard slick back frank

welcome back to the basement yard slick back frank welcome back to the basement yard slick back frank welcome back to the basement yard slick back frank welcome back to the basement yard slick back frank welcome back to the basement yard slick back frank welcome back to the basement yard slick back frank Boat baby back slip slip it back you baby bastard bitch Slick back boy slick back slick back ball Leak and slick slick slick Snake you're a snake is naked snake

It does look like you got your head at like you're on a hog and she's blowing Hairstyled by wind I would love that I don't think that's ever happened to me You said that like it was a commercial like get your hair styled by wind would you get on a motorcycle? I've been on one and I'm again really cycles. Yeah, we want the back. Yeah, it was my I've told you that I've been on twice I've been on two motorcycles hugging a man. Yeah, which at the time for me was awful You were catching a dub back. I was Cuz you got it It was also one that like you hold on to like you're about to like Squat and like take a piss or something like that. Wait, what it was like the ones there

There are certain ones where you can like hold on like this. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But, uh. Were you doing that or were you like hugging? I think one of them was a hug. One of them was this, one of them was a hold on in the back because one of them was my uncle.

And. Which one was he? You were hugging your uncle? I was hugging my uncle. OK. The other one was my ex-girlfriend's father. And that one you were like. Yeah.

And you remember who it is. You remember the ex-girlfriend. I actually know. You know. You know. And Dino was his name. Oh. And that one you were like yeah, and you you remember who it is you remember the actually no you know you know And Dino was his name. Oh, I could not hug him because he would have hit me yeah But yeah, it was like have you been on a motorcycle? No, I I'm one of those people like and it's one of the few things that my dad taught me that I think has value and I Crazy sense, but I I know there's a couple

few other things but he's like known several people that have gotten and we've known people that have gotten into motorcycle accidents and he like it was the first time I heard it I think it's a very well-known popular saying now but it's just like Frank with motorcycles it's not if you get

accident it's when if you get an accident, it's when. You know? Yeah. You know what? So my dad, like from an early age, he told, like legit said to me, he's like, I will support you anything you want to do. I think he was really testing the boundaries there, but he's like, except for motorcycle. Okay.

Not doing that. But if you were to ride a motorcycle, would you get one of these? Or would you get one of these? I would get one of these. I'd get a bike. I'd get a chopper. Wait, what? I'd get a bike.

But are you, like these? That's a chopper. You're talking like old Harley, you know, where, yeah. No, I can't do that. Because bro, I feel like I have less control of anything at this height. And my shoulders would fucking give out it does feel not Ergonomic like it just makes less sense if I'm trying to control this thing God forbid something's happening

And I need to control it. I feel like I have way better control here. Yeah, then I do here like whoa whoa Like let's be honest. Yeah, it would kind of give people the ick. You know what I'm saying like if it's so dumb Whoa! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha The other ones cuz you're like yeah, I also like there's something about large like not large but like loud motor vehicles that I want to fucking lose my mind like when someone drives by and they have like a Souped up fucking Nissan Altima. Yeah, and the fucking you know like neon lights like pops You ever heard that where it's like? Yeah, it's like dude you suck more than any other person I've ever met

I'm talking about yeah I hate it so same thing with motorcycles when motorcycles are just like the louder the better You know what do they say like the louder the purr the bigger the lion or some shit like that Just I don't know any biker so I wouldn't know if that's right or wrong the louder the purr the bigger the line Yeah, something like that. I mean it's not wrong. I technically right yeah, but I can't I don't know any biker so I wouldn't know if that's right or wrong. The louder the purr, the bigger the lion. Yeah, something like that. I mean, it's not wrong. Technically, right? Yeah.

But I can't, I can't. Yeah, no, I've never gone on a motorcycle. I would like to wear a helmet, though. I did have, when I was a kid... Like a blacked out helmet? You'd be like, tch, like you just shut it real quick, tch. When we were kids, my bike helmet was a motocross helmet. Like bicycle? Yeah.

You were wha- why do I not remember that? Um, I don't remember why. You were riding a bicycle around in a motorcycle helmet. And the helmet was like a helmet that had like the mouthpiece and like the eye- you could only see the eyes. Which is smart, dude. And you were taking it three blocks to the park. Well, no, I used to ride it to see my girlfriend, Tyena. Tyena?

Yeah, I did. Who the fuck is Tyena? I don't know Tyena. You write it to see my girlfriend, Taina. Taina? Yeah, I did. Who the fuck is Taina? I don't know Taina. Why are you upset? Oh my God. Bro, I've known you my entire life. I've never heard of you having a girlfriend named Taina. When I was in sixth grade, there was a Puerto Rican girl

in one of the classes named Taina, and I used to ride my bike to Astoria Park, and we would like look at each other from a distance, because her parents were super straight. Did she know you guys were dating? Don't do that, Anne. It's a fair question at this Don't do that. Yes. I wasn't just staring at this woman from a distance. You just said you were well

It was a consensual stare from a distance right she did she have like a pair of binoculars like oh I don't think it was that she was looking out like Elizabeth Swan like Like it'd be like I'd tell kids in like other classes like yo Let's meet at the park and it's like Elizabeth Swan like well, I'd be like I'd tell kids in like other classes like yo Let's meet at the park, and it's like you remember like dating Seventh grade is like when you saw your girlfriend It was like you were on that side of the park They were on that side of the park, and then you'd like see each other and she'd be like what's up girl. Hello Hello, yeah

She gets the water poured on it. I say that 24-7 hello So you have no desire to get on a motorcycle? No, nothing. Damn the motorcycle. Tyena. Oh, okay. Sixth grade? Yeah. Where were you? Baccalaureate? 141. Oh, 141. Yeah, no, I just wasn't tapping your ass. I had my first real girlfriend going into the summer, going into sixth grade. That was your first girlfriend No, no, she wasn't it was a girl name was your first girlfriend We've talked about this briefly, but it was a girl. I went to summer camp with Randy no shit

There was another girl named Nicole. Oh, okay, and Maybe it was the year before but her name is Nicole. She lived in Ireland Fire and like she was a real person like I know Ireland and like she was a real person like I know her yeah I know you just went to another school in another country first girlfriend lived in Ireland his second one he used to look at from across the park no so like sixth grade I

was just like oh girls think I'm cute so I was just like I was like dating I was trying to date like oh like as much as I could yeah yeah it's beautiful who was your first like you're my girlfriend. I'm your girl I think I know the answer count well. Do you guys call each other boy if you go no no We like had a it was like we had a telepathic connection. You just knew that you like each other Yeah, dude, but like we never said I never I've never in my life told Jamie that like I

Had a crush on you said it more on this show. That she knows well she knew because everyone all everyone would tell her but like growing up there was this girl from kindergarten to fifth grade I've talked about a mad times on the show this is insane now but like I had a crush on her through like elementary school and like I've never said it to her but like you knew other people knew everyone I was I was putting it I was putting it out you weren't not telling like it was the classic thing of like telling your friends And it's be like just don't tell them do you so my first girlfriend. Did I tell the story on the show? We've told years worth of stories in chances are yes chances are also possibly no my first girlfriend actually was that girl Samantha in sixth

grade yeah I remember that but I did I tell you about my friend Sean how he like made it happen I believe you have but remind the people that are watching for the first time he literally just walked up because I like again you don't tell the girl that you like that you like them you tell everyone around her this is 2003 2004 yeah how dare you tell a girl that you like them insane you know how the people around them and then you let it get to her then you see what the reaction is exactly you let it and then and then it eventually gets it's like water like leaking in a wall you don't need to pour the water on that spot in order to see

the leak the leak will find its way to the leak eventually yeah your water will find its way to the leak eventually. Yeah. The water will find its way to the leak eventually, and then eventually, you'll find out. This is like what police departments do when they're trying to find a rat. Like they put a pe- something out there, and then it's like, oh okay, now we gotta find- Cheese, cheese, cheese, cheese. Peanut butter, cheese. Peanut butter and cheese. Peanut butter.

Yeah. That works really well. Oh yeah, very well. But, uh, my friend Sean knew that I like this girl, and then he had heard from her Consigliere that she liked me too, so he walked he's at one point. He it was like the end of a school date He's like all right you like him. He likes you you're dating and then we were dating and that was it yeah How's nice? That's how it was back in the day. I was not as I wasn't as lucky as one of those situations

I I had to be like I had to it's like so like do you think like there's even you know like if you like If you don't want to like it would be cool like you know like do you just like probably hate me? Don't feel the same about me because like everyone knows but like I have a question And like would you even like want to be boyfriend girlfriend I feel like you would you'd like I know that you think I'm a fucking idiot yeah I'm like loser oh yeah I know that was back at now what do you mean now I'll just be like lying in bed and sometimes be like it's crazy you don't even love me and she's like where the fuck you feel differently about me. Yeah, well it happens

I have something for you and I don't want you. Is it a motorcycle? It's can you imagine a fucking bike? I would get I'd get like a Fast and Furious bike then I would get a chopper Well, it would sit I would need to if I had a chopper. I would need to wear bandanas Yes, and you would need to have a very long mustache I don't and I can't but you can get one you could do it too look at you I know but then my shit starts turning weird colors also if I ride a motorcycle Do I need to wear boots or can I just do like sneakers?

Uh you need to wear boots the hell no then something needs to be leather on your body That's fair. That's fair. Yeah, I'd get whether whether be a jacket gloves to do to get school your hand oh hold on now I'm in I'm back in I love gloves cutoff gloves yo no you don't need cutoff gloves for riding motorcycles can I say something no uber drivers you don't need cutoff gloves what do you think you're doing I got into a couple of ubers in the last two weeks and there's been multiple drivers with cutoff gloves. I'm like Unless you're like bullying someone in the night. Yeah, what are we wearing? I don't understand that I think that's like an old-timey like cab driver cab driver thing yeah like they would have like that cab driver hat and

They they'd have to have the they go where you going. You know we need grip Yes, well you do need grip to drive. Hands. I also think you're not allowed... Some states might be like this, and I could have heard this wrong. I don't know if you're allowed to drive with gloves on. Why not? Because I think it could affect your grip. I could be wrong. And I honestly, now that I'm thinking about it, I I probably am wrong I know that you can't drive shirtless. Why not? I don't know that's bullshit. Maybe it's distracting That could be a good one. Yeah, that could be a good one

Do you remember like the whole we can't have women with their boobies out on the highway people be flipping over their car You would they absolutely would but I so just to so we don't bury the lead here. Yeah, I got you something Okay, and by I got you something and got it, but I'm taking credit for it right okay, okay? Um and hear me out before you jump down my throat before you're all in my throat. Just fucking hear me out, okay? No, I'm not doing come on Doritos vodka is it vodka yeah It doesn't specifically say uh it doesn't specifically say uh it says even say what it is it says Doritos Ex-empirical batch one so this is like This is like a collector's item right now, so you already got me into it

It doesn't be collecting dust. Yeah, it doesn't say vodka. He's right. It just says base spirit I'll like take a little tiny zip and and it says Doritos nacho cheese chips extract and then yellow Dye number five can't hold on set it on the table Why is there that much missing? Yeah, how much have you drank the picky boys a lot of it? Yeah, is it like for punishments? Yeah for punishment? Yeah, it's that bad It's not good. It's not good at all. I mean I hear me out. I you know I don't like vodka I Do like Doritos though favorite Doritos right now three two one cool ranch. Okay, all right or sweet chili

I was gonna go spicy right a spicy spicy nacho Roly for those of you guys that don't know The king of Doritos is Keith Yeah, he's tried and like not even like bro I'll pull up on Keith sometimes and he has a bag of Doritos and it's a color that I don't even know is a color Like a pink bag of Doritos and we're like what is it like a shade of green? I've never seen before It's like it's the cherry blossom flavor. It's exclusive to DC only and it's like how I walked there and got them Yeah, Keith Keith is like always been the Doritos King

So I wonder what Keith has to say about this has Keith tried this yet, and no, I don't think so Okay, well, we're going how are we gonna go to try? Oh, no These are big we're not we're not because you know I'm not first of all I'm not even I'm not I'm not drinking right now We're not we're not because you know I'm not first of all I'm not even I'm not I'm not drinking right now So we're gonna do a little a little little like a like a mouse sip, but we have to smell it We gotta do a little bit more than a mouse What's a mouse a rat sip okay a cat sip? Oh? Yeah, I'm fine with that now you ever drank water or anything like a cat Frank so many times of course I've so many times all right. I try to drink like a dog

Sometimes you ever watch a dog drink in slow motion. I love how they cup their tongue back Yeah, it's kind of dumb Does it smell good no it doesn't smell that bad at all all right so pour some I've smelled way worse than this alcohol was I've smelled things worse than this. That's a lot. I mean, I'm just gonna take a sip, okay Wait oh Let me I'm gonna give myself significantly less Still somehow the same amount the hell does this smell like? it doesn't smell that awful

so just so everyone is clear ant is on the other side of the camera covering his mouth because i think he knows what might happen i mean you guys might like it this is the worst thing i've ever done oh you guys might, they won't well hold on

hold on don't be so sure you never know this is so weird when I'm far away It doesn't smell bad when I get close. I'm like that's alcohol, but far away. I'm like what is that? I can't really smell it like I was kind of like okay. I Never had us. I don't think you could say it like I think I Don't know what the hell that is. I guess I am getting a little Doritos in there. I'm not getting any Doritos all right Well, you should probably pour a little more than no no no no bitch nice try. Do you have any? What's the cool thing do we have a cool thing?

But he bought Bob Aho part 10 throw parent roll yeah that one But like do you have like a different one words like oh, we're the one words. Just like we like fucking There's there's wooden ships. They're steel ships, but the best kind of ship is friendship I There was one I saw on love and love is blind it was like I'm not below you. I'm not above you, but I'm right here with you That's kind of cute, but like I hate the ones were like it's just like to fucking women's titties and like underneath is where their vaginas are what's the one where it's like fucking fucking yeah yeah yeah

yeah that was someone that was a fraternity that I not my fraternity but a fraternity I knew someone was in they were just like those forgotten for those that forgotten dig them up and it was like I'm rotten fucking rotten yeah it's like why something about why are we For those forgotten... For those that forgotten, dig em up and f- It was like... Fuck em rotten. Fuck em rotten? Yeah. It's like why?

It was something about necrophilia. Why are we drinking and promoting necrophilia? Yeah, it's kind of insane. Alright. We'll just say, cheers. I would say one at a time, probably take it for a... Just reaction-wise. Just reaction-wise?

Okay, I'll go first. Because this might- you might not take it after. No, we're fine. Okay. Here we go. We're just gonna do it. We're just gonna do it. We're just gonna do it.

We're gonna- yeah. We're gonna yeah we're gonna on five five four three two do on oh he doesn't like it I don't think he likes it why are you what is it it's got hold on it look like you're about to do a push-up how is it got hold on it's yeah it's not it's got a bad it's not like it doesn't taste bad it's just bad it's

unlike anything I've ever tasted so my brain is immediately like this is fucking poison it is The vodka part makes it poison yeah, the old polish poison, but like Russian. I don't know. Oh wait a sec hold on Oh is she coming up she had a say she's coming up in the basement She was down there playing video games, and she might come up for a couple chicken. It's time for dinner come upstairs God you just finished that right there I think I should right though it lingers and gets worse I'll say that don't don't pay it's not me it's not the worst thing I've ever tasted but it's far from the middle list part I've ever tasted no list okay let me give it a go

Okay, let me give it a go. Oh my god, that's disgusting Frank. It's bad. That's not good. I see why the- Oh my god, that's nasty. I'm sorry, I'm not fucking with you here. It's okay. I'm not.

I'll lock in for the people. Yo, that's disgusting man. I'm seeing stars. To me it tastes like someone, like you, when you threw up- Threw up- Doritos, yep. Yeah. That's me it tastes like someone, like you, when you threw up- Threw up. Doritos, yep. Yeah. This is what it tastes like.

Yeah. God. Did I just drink your whole- Did I drink your whole- Did I drink your- Did I drink your- Oh my god. Could I- Could I- Oh my god.

Am I hammered? Did I just drink throw up? That's the closest thing to drinking- My mouth feels like I did throw up. Yes. Yes. Yes. That's a big thing. Yes. My big yes thrown up in it or throw I threw out I threw out my throw up throughout your throw up. Yeah

Yeah, that's what it feels like when you're going to patient. Yeah for that's the medical jest Nope one of those causes the other yeah, I'll let you figure out which and just for shits and gigs shout out to them but what was your reaction to fucking doing that today you know that you throw gag gag real hard do you gag or do you throw up a gag oh I'm sorry how many gags is equals a throw up yeah you often throw up do you gag throw up or is it gag gag gag gag? I'm good. Probably the fourth one. It'll start to be like oh, no, I can't have one more gag

So a fifth gag is when you might be a girl That's that's that's I can see four gags is a lot because you have prolonged gags too Yes I've stopped eating Doritos when I'm drinking because I've thrown them up once and it was the worst tasting thing ever. Oh no. And then that brings it right back so I don't. That's how I feel about cheese doodles. I love cheese doodles but as a four-year-old I threw them up

and I just can't look at them the same. Really? Yeah. Puffed or crunchy? I like both. If you ask me what I am going to bring to the cookout, it's going to be puffed. Yeah, puffed is better. But like, Cheese Doodle brand.

Yeah. I'm not like, puffed like other brands- What about balls? You like balls? No, the UTS balls suck, dude. You don't like cheese balls? No! I love cheese balls.

Careful, we keep talking about balls, my aunt's gonna start to gag. I love cheese balls. I- they're just like okay, because I've never- 90% of those that I've had have been stale. Yeah. So it's such a small window. A fresh pack of balls? A fresh pack of cheese balls is out of control oh my god also like a ball good old fresh crunchy you know what I love doing with cheese doodles you're gonna love this because you're a freak with food I love putting it on my tongue and then like I'm in like a video game level you know those levels that's like you need to run through the things but it's

like it's gonna smush them or like go like that that way okay I just shoved my tongue as far to the roof of my mouth, and I crush that cheese doodle like it's my little bitch No so hard to follow what you said why but you're talking about a crunchy one Yeah, no I'm talking about a puff one. Oh you you go, HH? I go, I like send it to its doom. I like just shove it on my tongue. And its doom is the top of your mouth. And the doom is the getting crunch in the top of my mouth. Right.

And you remember those video game levels as kids? Where it was just like you need to run through a maze. You get like smashed. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like Crash Bandicoot had a ton of those. Sure. Super Mario, Donkey Kong. I don't remember many in Super Mario.

Donkey Kong either. The rocks that come down. Thwomp. Thwomp! Very good. How is that bad? Right? First time I've ever even tried that. Give me one. One what? A thwomp. Do it? Do it.

I don't know what it sounds like. Oh. So you're just talking about something that you don't know about? I know it. I don't know the sound. I did it once. I don't want to fuck up it was actually on top baby yeah anyway Pope died Pope's dead dude speak of ill Papa with a little more respect Joey ding dong the Pope is dead don't do that don't your eyes get out of there don't do that I don't know That's a song celebrating the death of the wicked witch that is a lot of people the pope was a good pope apparently He was a good guy. This dude was cool with like he's like yo gay people. I'm cool with them, dude

Yeah, he was like sick not that that speaks to me specifically, but I like that. He is like a Loving pope loving pope not like gatekeeping Catholicism or God I don't want a Pope that's like, yo, just straights. That's, bro. Get the fuck out of here. Not fun. Yeah, make this shit gay-er than it is. That's what I'm saying.

You know what I mean, dude? Yeah, get a little fucking gay. I think, you know, speak more respectfully of el Papa. Oh, no, I was just making a little song. I hear is your mom okay? My mom your mom is alright. She's not that Catholic my grandma would be distraught right? What did your grandma do when PJP went down? It's a good question. When did he go? 2008 or something like that so I was like four years before she went she probably didn't even know that was going on

Honestly, really sure far gone. I mean her eyes started going near the end. So I don't know if you could even watch the TV. What is the end though? Is that the last year? Three? Four? Five? Well that's the thing, I don't know. I mean, PJP was, he was like a lot of people believe he was the icon. And then after him, remember there was the... Benedict? Benedict.

I remember him because of the eggs. Yeah, or I always think of Benedict Arnold. And I'm'm like is this guy a traitor or is he a good pope? I don't know. I think we have a bad pope though. There was a pope who was investigated It was Benny. It's Benny Benny. I think Benny was in a little bit of hot water listen, man I also think that there might have been some loose ties to like Nazis What what yeah that I was not expecting yeah I think I think there might have been I don't want to speak ill of the fallen Pope's I mean nothing's gonna happen to you that's crazy just sitting there and just

putting a fucking flag in the ground away he feels about the afterlife I don't know that's not what I'm saying I'm in the middle I'm agnostic I'm not sure first of all the Pope isn't God. He's like his boy, dude. That's like his like that's his consigliere. That's his that's the hand to the God. No, the Holy Spirit. What is the Holy Spirit? Do we have a? You tell me. You've been confirmed, correct, confirmation. I did get confirmed. I got confirmed and to me the Holy Spirit is just like a You know, I think it's more of like a feeling Spirit yeah, like a like it's you know, yeah, there's an I got no problem with with I don't know I was raised Catholic

Yes, you were quite and I'm not saying anything bad about the Pope. Oh Way did your mom sing the hymns? Frank I don't know the last time you went to church, but some of the hymns are bangers. Really? Oh my god I just wish I- Do you know the hymns? Not really. And he will raise you up on Eagles wings. Eagles wings? Something of the breath of dawn And you to rise like the sun Eagles wings Shit is a banger dude I was focusing way more on my snaps than what you were saying. It sounded pretty good though.

Yeah, no, they got some shit over there. They know how to, they got melodies. I will say putting eagle's wings in there was smart because if they were just like, he will lift you up on like pigeon's wings, I'd be like, you lost me. Pigeons is crazy. You lost me, but like going with eagles?

You, you, but like you go to a Greek church, maybe they say like Pegasus's wings or something. Well, that's mythology. Yeah, but like. The Greek churches like are not being like, oh hail Zeus for when he struck down, you know, Cronos. You guys read like books about Medusa and shit? We guys don't do anything.

I haven't been to church in God knows how long. I remember, bro, Greek Orthodox from what I remember of it was just, it was shiny as hell. Shiny? Shiny, dude. What shiny? Everything, everything was shiny. shiny broke gold everywhere, bro Fire but and it was a lot. It was like shiny and then white because there was just like marble everywhere

Oh, yeah, bro the Greeks know how to church. Yo churches are beautiful, bro mad nice when we were in Dublin I walked into a church over there just to see any, anytime I'm like somewhere and I see a cool church, I'm more inclined to be like, let me go in. But like, when I see one here, I'm just like, all right, it's a church. But like- Nah, bro, you got, do you ever walk into St. Patrick's Cathedral? Yeah, that shit is nuts. Bro, that shit is-

The churches, the church knows how to build a building. They know what they're doing. There's nothing else they know how to build. They got architects. They, listen, they know what they're doing. Yeah. Did you go build they got a text listen they know what they're doing yeah did you go into did you go by uh notredame notredame of course was that cool it was cool damn very cool it was open i walked through it they have a bunch of shit in the back they have a bunch of dead people in there too i think so tombs or something catacombs oh good word to branding to the catacomb is that just like it's underground i don't know don't know when it makes it a catacomb. Is that just like it's underground? I don't know don't care. I will say this I

Do think it's crazy that people like you can like bet on like The new pope the new pope like is the new pope gonna be a person of color is the new thing got a black pope up there Are they gonna? We could be we could have a black pope I didn't even know that that was like a thing that like I think you figure those You know an old traditional thing like that is a little race. Yeah, they don't strike me as a very welcoming group Black pope have you ever had a black pope I don't know it's gonna have to do some digging on the Pope No way no

I don't know if we've ever had a black pope But have you was your mom and grandma when he like came here were they like we need to go see the Pope Oh Papa no, I mean not even PJP. I didn't even know the Pope even came to New York What was he doing here? Well the Pope mobile is like a sister. It's a famous vehicle I know that I thought he just drove around the Vatican. I didn't know he would like come to New York was he going to Carbone? Yeah, like was he doing here? Well he goes to churches and stuff. He'll go he'll be like yo, I'm doing it. He does like a tour I'm doing a one-hour set at st. Patrick's come see me. You know might be some special guests. Yeah Yeah, yeah, yeah like that's maybe what they should do with the next pope like they should promote it as like a comedy tour

You know what I'm saying? Just like and they'll call it as like a comedy tour, you know what I'm saying? It's just like and they'll call it things like the Pope Maybe I'm blessed on tour 2025, you know It's just like 80 cities worldwide, you know tickets available, you know, just three prayers now that I think In order to get in you gotta yeah Let's show us your Hail Mary at the door, and you get a VIP entrance. There's no uh Like when you're going through security, it's pearly gates. Yeah, yeah, yeah, they get through The security isn't like patting anyone down. They're just going like all right

Great They're only selling holy water yeah we're we're still going we can keep going on we're selling hosts you keep going Greg will be up there he'll be the producer and he'll like throw the Eucharist out at the end of the show you ever had one of those yeah did you see I saw someone when you came to church for me hell yeah I saw someone recently like made one that was like they made it in like mac and cheese and they were just like the crunchy Eucharist or something like that that's bananas. That's a leave me maybe a little more blasphemous than I'm

Really, I don't know. I'm not doing it. I'm just saying someone else did someone else did do it Which is which is the issue so do you think? If your grandmother were alive today, which just to cover the basics for those you guys that have missed it. She isn't Do you think she'd be like What would her reaction be? All right, you be to my grandma I don't remember your mother's maiden name and don't say it on the show just in case people okay, you know start looking tracker Yeah But like grandma Joey

Yeah You're her. Okay. Yeah. Hey grandma. Did you call a grandma? You call a me mom? You're all a bin bomb grandma okay bomb how do people people get crazy with a grandma we go so alright So I'm you go ahead your grandma Joey go. We should like hey grandma. How you doing? Good, how's everything going good? I just walked 10 miles to the supermarket. Okay? It's only down the block grandma. I got lost okay? Hey, grandma. I have some bad news for you now. I need you to act here. Joey. Okay. We don't know who's watching Spielberg might be watching Pull together he is pull it together. Okay. I'm my grandma seriously. I'll be you

I'll I'm gonna act straight to like it straight like Grandma seriously I'll be you I'm gonna act straight to like straight Alright put on your best straight. I'm gonna be my best like okay. I'll be my grandma alright well how old am I grandma? I what year was she born? Use that for context. What does she live through did she see World War two she's seen everything. She see Korea? She... I don't know honestly. Not the place. She was born in like 29 I want to say. Oh, that's crazy. My grandmother was 26 It does nothing. There's no relation there. Okay. Alright, so so 1929. No, I'm saying like what age am I? Am I like near the end grandma? I'm near the end grandma. So if she was born in 29 that means she was what 63 when you were born or something like that? Frank whatever. Yeah, so I'll be my grandma. Ready go. Okay I'm nearly a 29 that means she was what 63 when you were born or something like that Frank whatever yeah

So I'll be my grandma ready go okay Grandma I Have some bad news I'm joking, I'm joking. I'm joking, I'm joking. I'm joking, I'm joking. I'm joking, I'm joking. I'm joking, I'm joking. I'm joking, I'm joking. I'm joking, I'm joking. I'm joking, I'm joking.

I'm joking, I'm joking. I'm joking, I'm joking. I'm joking, I'm joking. I'm joking, I'm joking. I'm joking, I'm joking. I'm joking, I'm joking. oh my fucking god oh my fucking god god almighty it wasn't even like that like my back

my back bro i'm joking i'm joking i'm joking oh my god oh god almighty that was good no no no okay be serious be serious do it again do it again you gotta ring me back in now straight me out come on okay what are we doing this for what are we doing for us no but like what am I

Spielberg no no what is the situation why am I telling you the gram that the Pope died oh she Joey oh all right grandma yeah I don't know how to say this The Pope is gone where you go Hopefully to heaven he's died he's died He's died He's done. You know they say like could be that could be the proper way because you know how they say like he is risen That doesn't make sense to me, but it makes sense to them. So like he he is died. Mmm. Oh you said he is died

Well, he's is an abbreviation of he is. True. I'm so sorry. I hate to break the news to you. But here's the thing. I don't think my grandma really cared about the pope like that. She like... What does she love more then?

God? Hey, grandma. God died. Oh shit. Oh shit! Listen, we have sponsors. Sorry, grandma. Oh man, I'm in big trouble.

Big, big, big trouble. Oh, man. Oh shit, oh shit! Listen, we have sponsors. Sorry grandma, oh man, I'm in big trouble. Big, big, big, big, big fat trouble about that. You won't see it, she won't see it, she won't see it. We hope. Rocket Money, how you doing? The show is sponsored by Rocket Money. Rocket Money is an all in one personal finance app that is going to put money back in your pocket.

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Well, we're past that at this point. I need to talk about this. A local pizzeria, where was this? Doesn't matter, who cares? Make up a town. Bimbomb. So a local pizzeria in Bimbomb, there was someone who came in and they ordered a Miller Light and then the people at the... Okay. A drive does not... Great beer by the way, I stand by it.

You love Miller Light love Miller light so this woman order a Miller light and then it came to the table and it was a Bud light yeah so right oh careful careful but where was this because the city might actually mean something now yeah Huntsville Alabama that's actually a progressive part of Alabama oh well I love the people of Huntsville I don't know I think I don't know but so there was like this this story where they brought over a Miller light and then it or they ordered no like they got a Bud light and they didn't want to really bring it up but then a firm was like oh you should say like you know whatever so they were just kind of like oh you know this is the wrong beer I

actually ordered a Miller Lite so it was like that then when they got their bill there was the pizza that they ordered the beer and then a five dollar bitching fee oh shit which is like when I first heard the story I'm like yo I'm on board with putting bitching fee on on people's like orders That's not I mean gotta be careful that is the I mean if you're giving that to a woman there So there's something there that is not really cool giving what a? bitching fee To a woman it's kind of it could be there unless they're bitching derogatory. I mean you could just be do you have an asshole?

I feel like asshole is pretty gender neutral I mean you could just be, how about asshole? I feel like asshole is pretty gender neutral. I mean, a dude can be a bitching fiend. I agree. Anyone who's being an asshole in a restaurant, especially if you're being an asshole to the waiter, and you're like disturbing other people's, you should get a fee. I am, I just want to make this very clear. I am fully in agreement. Yeah, that's not a bitching fiend. I mean yeah, no, what this person clearly clearly did it sounds like they were just like listen

Like I'm sorry, you know which honestly is the as the the person working there She's be like you know what my bad like this is on me. Yeah, and then give or or be like yeah Okay, and then bring them another one that's on them. You know on you on the house or something But like I think if you make a mistake and someone brings up a mistake. I don't think that's bitching Yeah, I don't think it's bitching either, but I think that there are instances that do call for bitching that 110% require like and a bigger fee than five bucks Yeah, I think if you're disturbing people. I'll be honest disturbing the peace DTP

What are you pointing at me? You remember Disturbing the Peace? Ludacris's like group? I think if something is bad enough I will take a $5 charge in order to raise hell. I think a bitching fee should be like No, it's tiered. 100% tiered.

It needs to be like, minimum though minimum 10% of the bill because if you go bro if you do a $10 and I'm buying $400 worth of food at a restaurant yeah whatever you got it but if I see that my bitching fee cost me 10% of the bill and that bitching fee should go to the individual that got fucking in bitch that bitch that yeah, I really can't see Unless the waiter was being was like name-calling and being like disrespectful in that way I can't think of a reason why someone would stand up in a restaurant and be like and like throw their

Napkin down like this is unacceptable like I can't think of a reason why that I used to love this establishment When I start I come here all the time and spend money! I don't give a fuck. Bro, I saw one of those the other day. In real life. Real life white privilege from a Karen. I can't. And I had to like...

I had to like remove myself. We went to go take the kids to take pictures with the Easter Bunny. And this woman, we were in the line for like the timed fucking slots. You know, like the appointments, and the other woman was in a line that it's just like, you run the r- like we'll get to you, but like, these are our priorities. And she's like, I've been coming here since he was a baby. I- this is not how things are done around here.

And it's just like, in what world do you think that is going- I hate that. If anything, personally, I am going to go out of my way to make it harder on you I just don't like that. I come here all the time and spend money. I Pay your salaries. Oh Frank. Yeah, don't even get Yeah, I pay your salary Excuse me. Yeah, I can understand it on like a government level when it's like, you know, like elected officials any sort of bitching though I like you don't like bitching

I don't you would rather like someone if you saw like spitting your food you'd just be like, I'm gonna eat this I know. No, I know. That's a little crazy, but like It would be very difficult for me I I don't think I have it in me to like stand up in a public place and like, you know Whatever if something's happening to me I can see that happening if someone's being disrespectful like if we were out and the waiter was being a dick to you or Being a dick to another table or something then I would be more inclined to be like what the fuck But if someone's doing it to me

I'm just gonna either remove myself and say fuck off or like I'm not gonna stand by make a scene bro also You need to acknowledge if you're one of those people that bitches at people like service people and you're with a larger party They're fucking collateral dude. You're now you're now ruining You're potentially putting everyone at that table at risk so yeah if I'm with you hypothetically you wouldn't do this But hypothetically if a situation like that happened where it's like me and you were out, and you started bitching, I'd be like, yo, you're fucking, now they're just gonna be spittin' my food! Because you're a bitcher by association. Now, exactly, now we're bitching.

Yeah. Now it's not the later bitching over there. They won't say like, the guy at table six, they'll say, table six is bitching. And I can't have that because then, then... We're all done. We're all getting spit in our food, you know? Or we're all, you know, paying for it. Bro, that's another thing. Ugh.

If we're going out to an establishment, I know you don't do this now, neither do I, but like, people will split the bill. If there's a bitching fee. If there's a bitching fee, I'm like, Yo, you're paying that. You gotta pay the fee. I'm not paying your fucking $5.

You're the one who bitched. You bitched, bitch! Yeah. And I don't like that. Me neither. I don't like that at all. I'm not splitting, you're paying you gotta pay the I'm not paying your fucking five dollars You're the one who bitch you bitch bitch. Yeah, and I don't like that me neither. I don't like that at all What do you think bitching thing? What do you think is like the worst to your bitching? Because there's a level of like this person just won't pay this I'm even okay in certain places in intimate restaurants You being like fellas you've been a little loud Chill out. Oh, just with like, laughter? Blowing it down.

Not laughter. Like, just noise. Like you're very loud, bro. Like, there's other people around. I mean, I think, yeah, I can see that, because if you're not matching the vibe of where you are... By the way, this is coming from a person who grew up in a family that is loud. Very loud. And I hated being at a restaurant with like my family and then our like uncles and aunts and stuff and I'm like I feel so

bad for everyone in here. Well then you need to read the if you're if you have a loud family and you're going out to dinner you need to be a good tipper. You can't do like oh I'm just gonna like tip normal. If family and you're going out to dinner, you need to be a good tipper. You can't do like, oh, I'm just going to tip normal. Whatever you're doing is putting the people on that staff in some form of pressure, you have to acknowledge that you need to be a better tipper. My family wasn't like, they're not assholes. They're just loud people. Yeah, just in pro, same. Very nice to the staff, like tippers, like whatever,'re just loud people. Yeah, just, bro, same.

Very nice to the staff, like, tippers, like whatever, but like, not, just not quiet. Bro, my mom, I love this woman to death. Going out in public with her to like a restaurant or a store or anything where there could be a minor inconvenience on her, it's bad. Bro, for my, Becca threw me a surprise party, like not a surprise party, it was like a surprise dinner for my 25th birthday with my family and my mom, we ordered a bunch of small plates, we were at Elm City Social in New Haven. Okay. We ordered a bunch of small plates but like you know the idea is like when you order small plates for everyone to share like unless no one

else is getting a main then bring it out All at the same time, but if people are also getting mains bring those out first Yo, you would have thought that someone like smacked me in front of my mom the way she was she was furious bro, and no I need them to and I'm like mom you have to You have to stop you know what I don't like to When like there's something wrong with the food or whatever, and the waiter's right here, and you're telling me what's wrong with the food,

and they're standing right there. Tell them. Not tell them. Wait till they leave and then say it to me! I don't want to be here! You talking to me and then you're like, no, this is like, ew, this, what is that?

That looks, the guy's right here. Wait till he leaves! Yeah. Then say it! I- I am in full support of a bitching fee. I think it shouldn't be a dollar amount. Unless it's like, you know, ordering one beer. That makes sense.

That's fucked up. That makes sense. That's not a bitching fee. No, she didn't deserve that. And if there's something wrong with your food, or you get the wrong beer, or whatever the case is, and you're like, hey, I'm sorry, I actually ordered this thing. No, bitch. Yeah. Your mistake. Oopsie. But also you need to acknowledge, like, is, I'm sorry, I actually ordered this thing. No, bitch. Yeah. Your mistake.

Oopsie. But also you need to acknowledge, like, is it worth it for you? You know what I mean? Like, I will say this. You eat the food, and then you bitch. Oh no. Now you're getting a bitching fee on top of that. You don't get to eat the food and bitch and then bitch.

You're getting a double bitch fee, baby. Yeah. You'll be two bitches at the same time. Right. I'm just, I think, in in that situation clearly wasn't pitching. Mm-hmm. Personally I will just drink the the the Bud Light you know sounds like this person had an issue with Bud Light. Let's let's and let's say it right now Bud Light Miller Light same thing. Pretty similar. Come on. I don't have the taste

buds to go like yeah that's the original light beer you know every light beer is slightly rest right slightly less or more tasting like rust hmm it's good way to think of it you know maybe we should like rusty water we should do like a taste test of something to see like because I don't think I can taste the difference between Coke and Pepsi I could definitely take I mean I I'm just giving an example. I think I can but I'm saying waters. Yeah like This is aquafina. This is not a chance and fuck you know I don't Fiji yeah, you know smart water. I don't I don't think I could no way beers

Maybe so are you on board with what I'm saying? Here's what I propose to all restaurants, bars, whatever, people that serve food, basically. Or drinks. If there is a bitching fee, it needs to be clearly tiered. It needs to be tier one, tier two, tier three. And you get a warning. Oh, of course course everyone gets one warning One warning one mall. I want to let you know you are approaching tier one DEFCON one bitching fee

You could you could potentially be incurring a fee yeah, and then it needs to be a percentage of the bill I Agree, I would need some sort of description as to why Okay, I mean the the warning like I warned you and now you've entered the bitch zone. Now you're- Right. Like now there's nothing I can do, I'm sorry, but the charges will be charged. Now you're in bitch zone level one. Right. Keep it up.

And there's a bitch zone level two. And then you're in double bitch territory. Yeah. And so help me if we- You don't want the three headed bitch. If you get the Medusa bitch Then we're in trouble service what Cerberus? Cerberus had three dog. Yeah, I was gonna. I was originally it's a Greek dog Originally I was gonna go Hydra, but Hydra no famously, you know the saying go ahead cut one to grow back

Cut off one head two more shall take its place Wait, who's Serpa? What'd you say Cerberus Cerberus the three-headed dog in Greek mythology also fluffy from Sorcerer's Stone fluffy yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah shots of Hagrid by the way by the way they're coming out with a show hype day one I was who's a Hagrid I forgot it was good frost from the Dead oh that's a good one that's a great one dude That's a great one, dude Yes, yes. Yes. Yeah, good. Good one. Yeah, I people have been upset because black snake basically Yeah, because here come here come the racists. They came some of JK Rowling's most diehard fans They're not racist they're transphobic yeah, but there's some other stuff in

Diagram of hate, kinda. Yeah, I think you're either on the team or you're off the team. But yeah, I forget, I don't want to butcher the actor's name that's playing Snape, because it would be insensitive to them, but like, I'm excited to see what they could do. Bro, I'm fucking hyped for a Harry Potter show dude dude love Harry Potter and you know why let's think of it like this all right I'm gonna here's my hey do you have that soapbox before that you were standing on before do you mind if I have it I don't know I think so about you all right cool if we want to go like acting wise you know like who's gonna act I don't want

to spoil anything about Snape for those you guys that haven't seen or read the books, but like, this actor's gonna bring some real world gravitas. This is someone that has had to probably endure some real world bullying and racism in their life so like bringing that to the role, this Snape might fuckin', no disrespect to Alan Rickman, might be pretty good. Rest is soul. Rest is soul. Do it Alan Rickman, right pretty rest is soul rushes salt do it Alan Rickman right now

come on that's not even a single line Potter Potter I know that you were asking me to do it because you want to do it so I was just trying to get there for you fame isn't everything oh you know it's crazy through all those movies not one of the students ever was

like come on just fucking say the sentence I'm watching the movie and I'm like talk faster Get to the nose Snape would not have lasted in like a Bronx high school because he'd be like alright everyone Shut up and someone would stand up suck my dick Eat my dick eat a Frank's night. So would stand up and toss a textbook at Snape. Yeah, 100%. Firm isn't... Alright! Talk faster!

Oh, and chances are Malfoy would have been just... Absolutely had the shit kicked out of him. I don't mean to do this whole Harry Potter thing again, but like... Someone explain to me this shit, right? You go to school. And I know you guys don't have the answers but you go to a school you open the textbook and like learning a spell just how fucking hard can it be it's a word and this why we make it seem like this is hard well I think that there's probably instructions and like there's probably more magical like the

essence like you need to feel it like the way you stand and like your foot is off and like as as as much as like a swish and flick I mean look at what Seamus did he blew up his face That's what I mean how is that how is that happening how bad you have to be to blow up your fucking wand I think the same way that you have to like know like general mathematic arithmetic like you can't just look at something and go I know it all now You need to be able to apply it one word you also need to Remember hundreds of spells where they should be like yo, can you get that for me, and you're just like uh Lumos I don't remember you know what I mean like you need to be able to recall that information quickly have you Memorization how hard is that have you ever a lot of people it's very difficult Have you ever tried to hit a target with a rented paintball gun compared to like a professional? That's a great point ants on point duty today

Let me tell you I don't get so the wands are like the straw like the that's pretty much how the so they all have But they all have good one not really they know they all have Probably has some dog shit one when they like share wands and shit You know when like fucking Ron is like using so-and-so's one and shit like that, but like they all have their own ones It's like a class system like the like the richer kids have good wands like the obviously the professors But I think some kids have bad ones Well, some of them might have hand-me-down wands But I think that like it's like part of the curriculum that like you need to get these books

You need to get these wands so like here's like a voucher for Ollivanders, where like, buy the wand, bring us, give them the voucher, bring us the stamp, and we'll give you 95% of the money required. But didn't that dude say like, the wand chooses you, so if you're just like a bitch, then like, you're gonna get in there and get some whack wand. Yeah. Cause it's like, that's the one that's calling for you. That's true. That's true. That's a good point. You'll never be a good wizard.

I really wanna go to Harry Potter World. I know we talk a good point. You'll never be a good wizard. I really want to go to Harry Potter World. I know we talk a lot about Harry Potter on this show for some reason. I love that shit. And I also wish it was real. I would love a wand and I would love to just like... Well, the convenience of life would just be out of control. Yeah.

Although not being able to use magic until you were 17 or 18. I'd be totally cool with not having a wand. Can't do any of that. But riding around on a broomstick would be something I would do. That's magic. You can't do it unless you're 17 or 18. I'd be totally cool with not having a wand, can't do any of that, but riding around on a broomstick would be something I would do. That's magic, you can't do it unless you're 17 or 18. Frank, I'm 33. I'm saying like,

leading up to that point, you know. Oh yeah, whatever. But I would like to be on a broomstick, or even better, on a big dragon thing. A hippogriff. Let me tell you. That thing. Let me tell you. Get me a hippogriff. Me and Buckbeak, like fucking this son.

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Whatever that means. A body in the summer is what it is. A body in the summer? Well, and don't forget, folks, just be on the lookout. We are rapidly approaching dog-sucking season. Deceiving. We are, we're getting close. Oh, fuck.

Stop. Let's keep you under. Prank, prank, got me, pranked. You got pranked, you've been pranked. Keep you under toes, bitch. Yeah, well, he was loading that up for about four minutes. Yeah, yeah, yeah, all for that. Did you say to him you like that

you might like that part more than the prank it probably honestly I even try to whisper to him this season I think last year we coined it we agreed that this season dog-sucking season the topic excuse me the theme is going to be this year the dog sucks you so Stay on the lookout. We will have Some more information coming will be I don't even we will don't worry about it this year the dog This is you this is season four of dog suckin season. Uh-huh. You know we've gone through some incredible iterations you know we we are innovators of

hotdog content on the internet, and I think we need to continue to maintain This the suckage of the dogs not only the suckage of the dogs But everything around the power behind the suckage of the dogs because yeah, I think people know and respect us now as quality suckers of dogs yeah That's the thing I I so we if we don't get a fucking hot dog sponsor. Yo, it is crazy It is it is I just want to drive the truck It doesn't even need to be that it just needs to be like bro and all respect to him because I love the show and I love him the guy that played Kevin in the office Brian

Baumgartner yeah yeah forgive me if I'm butchering his name he got a deal with Bush's baked beans for chili dude that makes sense he's the biggest mover of chili in the modern century he is the chili guy are we not the biggest movers of hot dogs in modern century? Are we? I don't know if we are, but I'd like to be. And I'm not even saying consumption wise, because I understand Joey Chestnut. He has his records. He's got some stuff.

He's got, you know, yeah. Didn't they just kick him out though? I think there's some stuff there. Yeah. Oh well, because I think like something happened. Well, he like took a deal. Well Netflix was just like, yo, come suck the dogs with us. Yeah, and Nathan's like, bro, if you're going're gonna suck with them you can't suck with us yeah I'm just saying I do

think that we are we're up there we're up there we're up there who else is peddling hot dogs like us I would love to see and this is a serious thing since we've started discussing dog suckin season I would love to see the hot dog sales numbers in the United States. Do me a favor, Ant. All right. Now you're getting crazy, Frank. Do me a favor.

Try to find that. I just think that there is... Just look up dog sucking... No, don't do that. No. Look up hot dog sales in the US by year. I'm pretty sure you can cross-reference dog sucking season and hot dog sales in this Google Trends thing. Never mind, give me a second. Just do what you gotta do. I don't know what-

Dog sucking season, we know when we started talking about it. I just think it's time. Listen, I stand up for us, Joey. I'm very passionate about this. I can see it in your face. I think that we as people have done nothing but try to give back to the hot dog community, and it has given us so much. Despite all of the bad press that has gotten this year, human DNA in the hot dog community and it has given us so much Despite all of the bad press that has gotten this year human DNA in the hot dogs not gonna slow it down

Not gonna slow it down not gonna slow it takes 25 minutes off your life if I live in a world where hot dogs kill You I'm ready to die tomorrow You know what I'm saying, and they don't they Might we don't we don't know you don't know until you're gone that's the thing really I don't know I don't even know that either I'm just saying how could we has ever been an autopsy where they open you up and then they go hot dog you know haha oh god hot dog

I mean maybe if it was like choking or something ah but like choked on a hot dog bro this there's this fucking guy that has a ponytail That has he's had a Big Mac every day for the last like 40 years or something like that And he's got a ponytail. He's got a ponytail and he's been eating cheeseburgers every day every day What's this guy smell like probably what you would expect a guy that eats every day a Big Mac beef and piss yeah and Probably stale hair. Yeah, you know what I'm talking about I actually do know

I'm just saying what he has done for the Big Mac. I think you can make the argument. We have done that for hot dogs With a little help from you guys we're Begging now at this point We the people that watch the show and have supported us consistently go out and buy hot dogs and send us pictures of hot dogs and tag us in hot dog related content. It's actually, you know, hilarious that like during the summer a lot of my DMs are pictures of hot dogs. I love it.

I don't get those, but people tag me, I see the tags on Twitter or something. Oh, yeah that too. I really don't see like Instagram or TikTok, but like, I just like, what we have done for the culture of hot dogs. Look at your eyes. We are shaping a generation. Your eyes look so sad. To continue an American staple. Let's be honest, Joey. America is not in the best situation right now. shaping a generation your eyes look so sad to continue an American staple let's

be honest Joey mmm America is not in the best situation right now a lot of turmoil a lot of arguing turbulence are there tariffs on hot dogs we don't know that no those are American made I don't know that either I don't know. I don't know. But, how can we as a country unite more and stronger if it is not through a hot dog? I am, I think there's a lot of different ways but I'm with you. I think I just stumbled upon a new theme for this year of dog second season the first one being the dog sucks you yeah And now the new one is now the new one I want to I'm gonna leave it to you and the people to see what they feel is more marketable Okay, speak with our marketing our people mm-hmm

Dog second season season four find love in a bun season 4 find love in a bun why i'm confused with but like find like re reconnect with people over a hot dog bro if you're telling me that fucking dick pills are having commercials where they're just like love happiness joy are they i'm just saying

just made that up why can't we do a super emotional commercial about fucking hot dogs, dude? Probably because there's like press about there being people in it. We're not sitting there and peddling that they're healthy by any stretch, and I'm not even saying just the unhealthy hot dogs. Bro, get a vegan hot dog in there. Yeah. Get a, get a, get a, get a a like an uncured turkey hot dog chicken hot dog I was just gonna say just chicken hot dog can't anything that that shaped in a bun Joey We are we are inclusive minded men

We want the world to be happy and everyone to feel included that includes chicken hot dogs I agree. What can we make like a like a like a like a like a dessert dog like what can it be hell yeah we like a brownie and then you put scoops of ice cream on it am I okay honestly that sounds incredible but I'm even go brownie might be a little too decadent yeah you could just do a cookie that's a phenomenal idea. And you could do ice cream like, or like, or shut up! You could do a cookie and you could do frozen yogurt on top as the ketchup. Yeah! And then you could do shaved chocolate.

Oh! In a bun? Hear me out. Now I might, I think I found another tagline for this year of Dog Sucking Season. You're all about the taglines dessert dogs bark for them that may be tougher to get through HR. Dessert dogs bark for them. Yes. Okay. I mean.

I will say that apparently, I don't know how they get the stat, social conversations about hot dogs have increased over 10% the past couple years. What about sales? What about sales? Fuck the sales, dude. 10%. No, we don't want to know. That's significant.

No, because if they can show that correlation between these social conversations has led to lower sales, they might be less inclined to wanna deal with us. True. And just Google hot dog sales by year in the US. I don't know if that's an easy thing to find. I'm sure you could find it.

I'll help you. So the past four years it was projected that the hot dog market, $20 billion. Beautiful! Now they're projecting that in the next few years, it'll double to $40 billion. So it is going up. OOOH! Hold on. All jokes aside, what the fuck?

I don't know. I don't know why. Why the hell would it double? Bro, anywhere you go, any event, any show, any stadium. But it's been that way. It's been that way. Yeah, but now people are making longer dogs. They're not switching the amount of dogs they're selling.

They're sizing up the dogs. That's true. Is a foot long one dog? That's a good question. Oh, I know. That's just like... It's not two dogs. It's by weight. It's by weight probably. It's by dollar amount.

That's probably why it's going to double. Oh, that's true too. The tariffs, bro. I don't know if that's true. But like the prices of things go up. Fuck! 40 billion dollars is insane, dude. Hot dog sales by year. Gotcha. The tariffs bro, I don't know if that's true, but like the prices of things go up. And fuck! 40 billion dollars is insane dude. Hot dog sales by year, gotcha.

Hot dog sales by year, US. We don't need to know the world, but honestly we do have a worldwide reach. I mean, I don't think they eat a lot of hot dogs in Europe. Maybe they should. I do have to sign into a lot of these things. It's fine. We don't need to. I mean if you find it great,

I'm just making a pitch and I hope, I hope that you can respect me as your co-host, most importantly, your lifelong best friend. What are you asking me to do? Co-sign with me. Dig our feet in the sand and say, we're not moving, world. Yeah.

Hot dogs. You're preaching to the choir, like, literally. I know. Yeah. And I just want to make sure that we're in this together. Yeah. A strong, united hot dog front. Yeah.

And we hold hands. But our arms are hot dogs. That's a great poster. Dessert dogs. Bark forum. Bark forum. Bark forum. I mean, where can you go from there? That was beautiful. Unbelievable.

Don't start making up more taglines. I think that we should go out on top. You sure? Because I feel like you're getting a little further from the point. The point is, here comes a tagline. I know you. Once you looked off into the distance to the left. I was like he's making more taglines Is that what you're doing?

I'll quit while we're ahead. I I will I can't give them this for free We are also respected businessmen you and I oh okay, and we need to be business savvy synergistic and understanding market fluctuations. Okay. Beautiful. Frank, where can they find you? Wherever you can find a hot dog, folks.

Because I am in essence in every hot dog that you have, as is Joe. Every bite you take of that savory delicious beef pork turkey chicken vegan goodness You're taking a bite out of joe and I Every bite out of a dog is a bite out of the basement yard Thank you folks Joe Technically that is it could be true because they did confirm that there's human dna in hot dogs That's besides the point the business is is booming, apparently. $40 billion. What a treat.

Anyway, guys, you can go follow the show at the basement yard and go follow me at JoeSanagato. And that is all. See you guys next time.