The Basement Yard - #527 - We Were In A Bank Robbery!

Episode Date: November 3, 2025

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19 plus Ontario only. Please play responsibly. Concerned by your gambling or that if someone close, you call 1866-3-3-1-2-60 or visit Comicsonterio.ca. Welcome back to the basement. Welcome back to the basement yard. You're wearing that Halloween merch, baby. I'm right. I know, I think this is coming out.

Oh, and Patreon is before Halloween. If it's a, you know, it's after or so sorry. No, I mean, it's been out. Don't yell at me. Shop.com. No one's yelling at. No one's yelling. No one's yelling at me. No one's yelling at you.

It is out. I like this a lot. I also like, like, like, it's a very. very soft good shirt. You like it? I love good shirts. Yeah. You know, because if they're too hard shirts, don't like hard shirts. Like instruction paper. You don't like when, when shirts have like collars that are real thick. And I got a thick neck. Like, I wouldn't say you have a thick neck. No, I got a thick neck. I got a big neck. Definitely don't have a pencil neck. I mean, I definitely don't have a pencil neck. I think this is a good one. Like if it's too tight, if it's too tight, if it's too tight, like if it's too thick, too tight, and then it makes it

feel like it's like choking me i don't like that's why i'm not like i have a turtleneck but i'm not a big turtleneck guy i like to wear it but i don't think it i can't it doesn't pull it off no offense well i'm offended by like i i'm not saying no no no no like you don't look bad but like you're not you don't you don't have turtleneck face like turtleneck face you have you have a like v neck face i that is so offensive it's insane it's more offensive vneck face is v neck face bad what am i simon cowl no he has i probably shouldn't say anything because he got into an accident about like a year and change ago wears a lot of venex he does deep vs too yeah deep viz what's the deepest v you've ever owned i don't know i actually saw a picture the

other day why did i see that oh maybe someone posted it it was like oh i met joe years ago and i was wearing a veneck like in public why would you do that i don't know i used to wear venex i like V-neck T's. I don't hate them. I, my dad once got me a V-neck T, like a set of V-neck T's from Columbia. The deepest, widest V you could have ever fucking imagined on a shirt. And he was like, here, this is the size XL. And it was like a medium on me. I don't know what they got going on.

They got small people over there in Columbia. Do they? I guess. But the V started here. No. Shoulder V? Dude, it was a wide V. Oh, no.

And it fucking came down. down to like right here. Sheld your tits off. Basically, I had boobs. Nice. And it was pretty deep. Becca hated the shirt. You ever put a bra on?

I don't, maybe. I don't know. And I don't think so. You've never put a bra on? Have you put a bra on? I have. You said that like it was like recent. No, no, no, not recent.

How did it fit? It wasn't great. They were a little more busty than I was. Busty. He said that. He's using porn. Yeah, she was a little bit more of a petite, busty teen than me. Yeah, sorry, I put that bra on it was for a big, big, uh, petite, big petite co-ed.

Yeah, I, I don't think, I'm sure I have put on a bra, it was late to be fun. Yeah, I didn't put it on because I was like trying to keep my tits in order. Well, no, duh, yeah, I mean, but like, I was like, look at a prank. Look, ha ha ha, I got boobies. Yeah, for a second. And I was like, oh, it's kind of kind of cool. Really? I don't remember liking it.

I don't remember wearing it. So I guess I did. High heels? You ever wear high heels? I have worn high heels, yeah. Oh, yeah. You did the drag show. I did a drag show in college and...

I wore high heels. It's tough walking in those things. Holy shit, man. Got to say. It's tough. I don't know. That's an insane thing to just like do willingly. It's a wild choice, I would say.

To walk like this. Why? To walk on your. tippy toes. Yeah. It's just, and it's like, it's, it's, it's, it's such a skinny shoe. I would feel so off balance the entire time. I like the dance in that.

I like, shoes are a sense of comfort for me. Like, I feel safe in shoes. You know what I'm saying? Like, my foot is in a whole shoe. When I'm in like sandals, or if I was in heels, I'd feel like I'm, like, like, the Pope riding around in like a top down. You know what I'm saying? Something bad's going to happen.

Some JFK shit. Yeah. I mean, I just don't, I just don't get. I mean, it does do something to a leg. To a woman's leg? Yeah, I mean, I'm not, I'm good with it over there. I don't need it on my dogs. Yeah, I need to make my legs.

I don't need my legs. My legs are fine. I don't need my legs sexy. Who does to see my sexy legs? Yeah, I mean, no one sees those legs. You don't really pull them out too often. I don't pull them out often. It's like Haley's comment over there.

Is like Haley's comment, mainly because my legs are mostly scars. I know you've scoffed at me for that before, and people love bringing that up. It is true. I confirmed that it isn't, and that's fine. I didn't see a single scar on your legs. Let's go there. Well, because they're covered by hair. If I were to put my leg right there in your fucking face right now, and you were to parse through my hairs, you would see quite a bit of scarring.

I wouldn't. Yes, you would. My dad won Mr. Sexy Legs on a cruise once. Your dad won Mr. Sexy Legs? Yeah. Frank's got his leg out. Also, parse through. I can see your whole leg.

No, brother. Point one out. That's one. That's from your surgery. There isn't anything. Where? Frank, that's not even a scar. There's another.

Just like, parse through. You're scratching your legs. Stop scratching them. You're also shiny like a sardine. What's with that? Why do you call me a sardine? Because you're kind of shiny, like a sardine. Because my legs are probably dry.

Hmm. But like there's another one right there. Frank, that is an ingrown hair. And you just scratch it out. And why did it, what was that a pebble that just came out of you? I'm uncomfortable. Well. Well, do you see what I mean?

No. Your leg is one scar. No, I have several scar. It's hard to see as someone that has had their legs shaved and waxed I can confirm there is quite a bit of scarring on there and you should be like supportive of me. Do I ever show you my big hair? I got one big hair and I love it because I play with it.

But it always grows back but I always try to rip it out. Look at my one big hair. I could see it from here. It's like when you can see the wall of china from space. I could see your one big hair on your white ass arm. Look how big that hair is. That's a big hair. this tall like I'm touching the top of it I know you guys can't see you can't see it

but I got a big ass hair and it's thick and she's strong too really yeah and like bitch out well I like to keep it I don't know if I have anything that cool I like to keep it you have hairless arms look at your arms don't talk about my arms dude look at the top of your arms is so hairless like a butt butt arms don't first of all your whole body's like a yeah it is yeah because you're you have zero hair that's it is It is. Let's see your butt. Is your butt like your head?

Do you have butt hair? No. Pull your butt out. I can't. Yeah, you can't. Mine either. I mean, most of my hair is like in the hidden regions. Right. But like.

That's crazy. Yeah, I guess I never realize how hairless my arms are. That's interesting. I mean, there's little hairs. You could see them. If you get up close, you could see the little ones. But you don't have big, strong, girthy ones like me. You have an strong girthy one.

Yeah, but it counts for a lot. Every now and then I get one long hair in my mustache, It just goes the opposite way. Me too. And it goes in my nose and I'm like, get the fuck out of there. I don't like it. I hate that. I wake up in the morning.

I look like a fucking dog and my shit is like... Yeah, I have that every now and then too. I also don't have much... I can, like, count the hairs on my chest. The chairs. The chairs are my hest. I have like... The chairs on my hest.

Yeah, I have like just a little like brown shirt. They're like scattered. Yeah. They're like scattered like Pickman. When you first started getting facial hair, did you keep just a chin? Oh, yeah. Me too.

I recently saw a picture of me that you took with a camera you got in your basement. And I looked like a fucking piece of shit. Is it when you were like this? Yeah. And it's just, yes, yeah. And I'm wearing a backwards hat. And it's just like I would only let this grow out. Right.

I remember, because that was the only thing that, like, grew consistently. I did the same thing and I look like an idiot. Yes. I looked so stupid. But the Soul Patch, man. You know, it's what we had. It's what we had going for us. I think at one point, I had it.

what resembled a goatee, which is terrifying. I mean, I've done just this. You've done a goat? You've goaded? There's episodes of me having done it. I look like, you know, like a really less talented Lin-Manuel Miranda. You know? Yeah.

Yeah, what? Yeah, what? Yes, you don't have an Emmy. Okay. That's fair. I do not. Yet? Yet, maybe.

You could have one one day. We could have one one day. You could also. But maybe also we. Sure. But hopefully me. But also, I mean, I don't know. The Emmys, they announced that they were going to do, like, best podcast, which is...

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Because that's why I was thinking. Well, we ain't getting that. We ain't getting that. Can you imagine that? Can you imagine it's like best podcasts and it's like, you know, a Britney Broski for the court. What's the... What's her show?

Oh, the Brosky Report? The Brosky Report, but there's also the one where she does like the Knights of the Roundtable. yeah well she's like a queen yeah yeah it's really good damn i want to wear a fucking crown yeah and then there's like amy polar good hang and then us right yeah won't happen or they're like a bunch of like m p m p a p a p r p r p r and p h yeah he might have one he might have one i'm bad with acronyms he might have one yeah mpr where it's just like all right today we're talking about like the atrocities and yeah somewhere and it's just like whoa whoa yeah how do you compete with that i i don't know It ain't this show.

It is not this show. It ain't this show, baby. You know, but by the way, I wanted to tell you recently, I got so humbled. Usually, so sometimes randomly on Twitter, my picture will start going viral, a picture of me. And then, like, it's usually gay Twitter that's like, you know, and they say a lot of nice things, but a lot of the stuff is very graphic. Gwitter. And I'm like, Gwitter, yeah, gay Twitter. And I see that, and like, it was funny.

And then I saw one recently, and it made my day. I said it right to my brother. But I, why, why? I'll tell you. What's the nicest thing they've said to you? The nicest thing? I mean, most of it is nice. I mean, it's just written in a way that is hypersexual.

That's just like, yeah. It's super intense. Something about drowning in a gallon of, you know. Come on. Stuff. Come on. Oh, yeah, come on. Come on.

I thought you were... I guess... That's what... I fell into it. Just like you fell into the vat of... There it is. Okay. But there was a picture of me, and I'm wearing a...

First of all, the shirt I'm wearing. This is from years ago. But I was wearing a shirt that looks like a Jaws shirt, but it says paws and it's a dog's paw instead of a shark. You know, and this is what's hysterical. This is what drives me nuts, because you would make fun of the fucking grass. Graphic teas that I had.

Had the. Had da, had da, had da, had da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da. No, I don't, I don't, I don't, I, all right, I have them, but I don't wear them anymore. They're in storage. They're in storage for my kids if they want to have really cool shirts in 10 years. Here, wear daddy's shirt. We're daddy's daredevil graphic tea. Yeah.

But this is what drives me nuts because the world forgets that you were a big time graphic tea haveer. Now I'm so glad that you're saying this. And you had ironic ones that were just like, you know, like, ha, ha, ha, pause. No, first of all, dude, this was like 2018. Yeah. That was, like, more when you... When's the last time I was wearing a graphic tee? Hmm.

Hmm. When was the last time? I mean, this, if you're going to talk shit about your own tea. I'm not talking shit. It is a graphic tea. By definition, it has graphics on it. But I'm saying, like, one of those, like, kind of like, tongue and cheek, ha-ha, this is funny, meant to be quirky.

Well, that's not just, that's not, only a graphic tape. We're off the point! So anyway, it's a video, it's a picture of me during a podcast, and I, like, have my shirt lifted up a little bit, and you can see my belly button, and then the picture is posted,

and there's a bunch of, like, interactions, whatever with it. Wait, are you going to show us the picture? I mean, do you want to see the picture? Yeah, I need to make fun of it. Should I send it to Josh to toss it up so everyone can see the picture? Sure. All right, send it to me. I want to see it.

Okay. So we'll put it in there, but it's this picture and then the guy whoever posted it wrote what do you call this genre of men right? Okay can I see now something like oh this is another one of those

things right so I was like I want to see what people are saying so because there's been one other time before where it was all negative oh like and it was like this guy's fucking mid or like it's like wait really yeah yeah yeah that's so mean but it's funny it's funny but also

mean it's Twitter it's not actual real so it's just funny to me correct remember that world but it said what do you call the genre of men the first reply under the photo

just says fat I was like oh I was like oh my god and then everything else under there was positive which was boring

but like I when I clicked on this dude and I saw fat I was like This is the fucking funniest thing I've ever seen. You know that people are going to come out the woodwork now and are just going to try to comment the most fucking mean thing. Yeah, I hope that's not the case.

Why are you giving this attention? Hey, guys. It was just funny, though. He's a real person that has real feelings, real heart. It is true. Okay? And although he might outwardly laugh at something inwardly, it might hurt him. So that is outwardly and inwardly funny to me.

It was just funny also because of what I was expecting because it has happened before. You thought it was going to be like top or like. girlie pop or like you know something like that yeah it's just fat what what would we call that class of men what like you well there's people who say i'm a hymbo what's a hymbo like a bimbo but a him again was that a dumb him i because bimbo was used for like it was like a dumb a ditsy you know like uh you know remember like chicken to the sea what is that you know like shit like that yeah that's a weird example but yeah i mean i mean that was that was what people like we refer to as bimboes.

Yeah, yeah. I don't agree. I think it's a little mean. I think it's just like a, yeah, like a ditsy dude. So you're a hymbo? I'm a hymbo. That's hysterical. What about like, there are other ones where I, you've been called like twink.

That was years ago. I think I'm well beyond that. You're well, well past twink. Yeah. Have you graduated to whatever is like, what, who evolves into it? What does twink evolve into? Twunk? Twunk.

That's right. That's right. That's right. That's right. I remember twunk. Someone one time called me an otter. I was like, this is crazy now. So twink, twunk, and then what's a, or is it like a two-stage evolution, like fucking execute an executor?

Yeah. Twank. I thought it was executor. Executor? Oh. Whoever it is. You know what I'm talking about, though. I know exactly.

So like, so, wow. I mean, you might be in a class by yourself. I'm not. You don't think so? I fit into, there's a hundred gay categories. Joey, I think you are incredibly unique. And you don't need to fall into any other class. classification outside of you just being you

performative males am I right ladies what's that what the hell's that the performative male what is that it's just someone who like it's just very like a performative I mean we're on the show

yeah no not in like performance more of like a a disingenuous performance oh I'm joking yeah same okay Um, but yeah, so I got, I got my ass handed to me.

Oh, my God. So if you're fat, what the fuck am I? Jesus Christ. I just, I just squeaked like the toy from Toy Story. Oh, weasy. Oh. Yeah. He almost, he's good.

You know, I wanted to tell you this, and I totally forgot, but I got rid of a throw blanket the other day that I've had for a while. And it hurt you. It didn't hurt me, but there was a hesitation. Which throw blanket? Not that I know your. throw blankets yeah i don't they're not named uh it was just like a white one that was on my white throw blanket brother yeah you're playing with fire i also like i have a dog so like it was

fucked up like it should you're playing with fire what what do you mean white like blankets and stuff like that like my bedroom blanket is white dangerous what what is your bedroom blanket it changes we have a we have a we have a we have a seasonal yeah it's one of the things What is it now, Brown? I'm very excited. Yeah, it's like a, it's like a creamy brown. Yeah. You know, but like, it's one of the things, like, it's like a thing that Becca does where

she'll, like, switch it up. She'll be like, come look at the bedroom and I'll run upstairs. And I'll be like, whoa. And it's, like, done for, like, fall on Halloween and Christmas and spring. Oh, you have a simple man, dude. He's, like, beds. I love beds. And I love, like, holiday seasonal shit.

Yeah, me too. I love it, dude. Do you have, which colors your bed? Navy. Navy. Maybe like you're still in college. Yeah, he's still in college. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

You got a poster? No, no, no. What's the last time you washed your towel? Towel? Oh, God. See what I'm saying? How often do you wash your towel? Uh, after every like two, three days, throw them in the wash.

We have a good, we have a good rotation. A system. A system. Very good rotation. And I got you a fucking towel warmer. Do you use it? Haven't used it yet, but it's, when the new bathroom's done, it's going in that bitch. There you best believe it.

You ever use a towel warmer? Didn't know that existed. Tow warmers? Oh. What's like it's pretty it's luxurious Machine It's like a little It looks like a little hamper

And you throw a towel in it And then when you get out So it's all warm And it's like woo And you can throw like you could throw like a robe in there Do you have any art in your bedroom My bedroom now What's on the walls

Nothing? A TV You live in a dorm room This place is a prison It's a prison It's a goddamn prison You live in a dorm room Of a prison

That's where you live I will say when I was, how, I mean, I guess I was like 25 or 26, my bedroom looked exactly like how you're describing it. Oh, yeah, 100%. It was always a Navy blanket. The last, like, solo bedroom I had, the decorating was at best, awful. Fake plants. Oh, yeah, I hate. Navy blanket.

Yeah. Navy blanket, maybe something on the wall that was, like, sports. sports related, which is like, what do we do in here? I mean, mine was way worse. I mean, in college, I had posters, which... Yeah, which is normal, though. Yeah, normal, but, like, still, also... I also had...

You're going to hate this one. I bet I am, like a Corona poster? No, no, no, no, no, no. I hung up my high school football jersey. Yeah. And the MFA football jersey. Well, I do know that you did that because it was also, when you weren't at college and you were home, you would hang them up in your bedroom.

You damn right, I would. There was jerseys everywhere. And honestly, I was... I can, Frankie, I can recall that when you moved back to your, your parents' house when you were in Connecticut and you came back to New York, you hung them back up then. Listen, yeah. I'm not sitting here. And you were too old.

You were one, too old for that. I am not, by any stretch of the definition, saying that I was a good decorator in my fucking, like, young adult fucking bedrooms. They were bad. I also had, like, they're not here. but like remember that Batman sign that I brought in like that was on the wall I like I like and I displayed it proudly on my walls Joey you know

what's wrong with that no I know isn't it funny that dude's just like it's all the same like it's like yeah we don't know how to decorate we don't always a navy blanket we do not we do not I still have the glowy stars on the ceiling and that's cool as hell very bad oh yeah bad

you have glowy stars oh from like your child yeah I just like I bounced around rooms a lot and I just never replace it because I would have to peel it off and the paint, I'm like, they still glow.

That's really cool. That's so cool, dude. That's so cool. I'm honestly, I'm a little jealous of that. Back as the decorator. I give all decorating, but we did like jokingly say,

she's like, I wonder what would happen if I just let you decorate one room in the house? And she's like, we know, it would be. But when we went to Disney and we stayed at Airbnb

and like, when you go to like near Disney, all those Airbnbs, they have like a Harry Potter room and a Mario room and the house that we stayed at had basically a fucking arcade and it was just like

a video game here in the wall and it looks like a big Wii controller and then like air hockey table and everything was painted and neon lights or whatever I'm like this is what Frank's gonna build in his house eventually it's not gonna be a man cave

I think yeah well I hate the idea of man caves they're corny as hell they are I hate them where you walk down the stairs and it's just like parking for Yankee fans only and it's like dude you suck

you suck so much I like I love a good basement but I'm never going to be one of those people that it's like themed around I hate it you know like the toilet seat cover is a Yankees toilet seat cover Yeah like relax dude Take it easy. Mets jets

No one with debts That I'm sorry okay That was horrible You know what I mean though Like I hate those There is a sense of irony It's saying that though But where

Our basement does have several areas where there are vintage toys displayed, but it's not like, it's like, you know, like, oh, if you like the Red Sox, get out. Yeah, or it's just like, you know, rule number one, Yankees ruled, new rule number two. Go back to rule number one. Yeah, it's horrible.

Yeah, I don't think Frankie would make a man cave. He'd make more like a playpen. Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. Fuck you. That fucking, that felt me. Frank, you would, though. Like a room that has like every console with their own TV. Yes, I have.

that up right now wait what I have two shelves around my TV and it's all like the consoles I have yeah see that's what I mean yeah that's what I mean but like I'm not doing it and like one of those guys where it's just like not cool about it like right it's cool it's really cool and I do yeah exactly know if someone else does it I can see it being too nerdy stupid so stupid but I did it cool guy not not bad yeah our basement is a work in progress right now right we're figuring it out but if we just so happen to have like cool video game stuff everywhere so what yeah you're gonna have a basement one day yeah and you're gonna want to make it cool yeah i don't know

what i'm gonna do with my basement i would like to do something cool you see that's what i'm saying like you would want it to be like on the wall it'll have like a picture of like you know david tyree catching the fucking catch on his head you know i know you're gonna want David Tyree, catching a ball. It is David, right? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, okay. Just want to make sure I got that right.

Yeah. But, like, that's what you're going to have. And then you're going to have, like, in the corner, you're going to have, like, a wine rack or something. Whoa, dude. Oh, what? You think I'm doing all these podcast episodes and all these shows to have a wine rack? I'm trying to get a room that has. Oh, so if I have a room of Megasords, I'm a loser.

If you have a room of a consumable, you're cool? a con oh oh of one yeah yeah yeah like a like a cellar like a little cellar you want a cellar you know what i really want my house a seller well more than that i do want a seller but what would be really cool a dungeon i'll get to it uh would be really cool if i had a reason to have one of those very slighty ladders oh like a i've seen people that have like florida ceiling bookshelves and then they have that it reminds me of like how the grinch goes So he's a, a what? Exactly.

You just painted that shelf with fucked it up. But you know what I'm saying? I do. I do. I like that. And I want to recreate when Harry Potter goes into Olavanders for the first time. And he looks down and he's like, you know, I want to do that. That whole scene, just like that.

When I was in, you weren't there yet, but I think we were in Minnesota or some shit. Went to a restaurant and their wine cellar. was pretty, like, skinny, but it was tall. And they had one of those. And the guy went, and not because we didn't order a bottle of wine, but, like, someone ordered a bottle of wine, and he got on the ladder and got all the way up there. And I was like, what a treat it would be if this guy just fell off the ladder.

Oh, man. You know what I mean? No, why are you going that route? Dude, there was a viral, this is maybe 20 years old. A video on, like, QVC of a guy on one of these ladders, and he falls off. oh no he's on the he's not on that ladder he's on like it's it's like the ladders that like are a frames and then they open up and they become like extension ladders and it like it's like this and he falls down right no no no he falls back if i'm not mistaken why does that why do you like that

oh man people fall in is so good did you see i feel terrible listen they're okay i hope this person is okay but did you see the video of the guy at the rally like running after the kid that like stole his glasses and just fucking face plants. Dude, first of all, I hope this person's okay. I don't want to wish fucking bodily injury on anyone. But he fell and he fell like face down,

ass up and like skin across the ground and I was like, oh, that's a bad fall, dude. That's a bad fault. There is something innately funny about people falling. And like, I don't like people getting hurt. Yeah, me neither. But like, the falling is funny. The falling

is funny. There is a thin line between pain and pleasure and beauty yeah you know like it's just like a good fall it's hard to beat you know it's really it's really is what it's really is you ever fall real hard in public i bro i fell earlier no but like in public around a bunch of strangers it's when's the last time you just fell it's like after 2020 you shouldn't fall down dude i fell when we were playing basketball and fucking sandy Yeah. Remember how hard I fell? No. We were in San Diego playing basketball and I went to like get the ball and I like stumbled and just kept going and fell backward. And like it hurt. Like we're getting to that age of like where when we fall it hurts. People have to be like yo, you good? Yeah. Like when people consider it a fall. Yeah. Then it's a problem. Dude. Oh man. And also what's better than watching someone just stumble? Stumbling is good. Like just can't stop stumbling. Like just can't stop. For like 30 yards. That happened to me once at our house where I like caught the lip of the driveway and I stumbled and fell into my home.

Like the door was open and I fucking fell into my house and rolled. Yeah. Rolled. Yeah, dude. It was bad. Like Willie Wonka in the beginning? Yeah. That's great.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. But not like he did it coolly. Yeah, he, yeah. I did not do it so coolly. Right. It was sad. Wow. Unbelievable.

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And we thank you and we love you and we appreciate you. Okay, you'll save yourself some money if you do it on a web browser. So save yourself some money. Go do it in a web browser. And listen, there's all. only two shows left guys do too too there's not much left so if you're coming to any of those shows go to the basement yard.com slash submit let us know which of those two two shows that you're coming to and submit a question response you know part of the shows are interactive we talk to you about you with

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We love you, we miss you, we'll talk to you later, bye, bye. You can notice how often you talk in threes? Like, we love you, we love you, we miss you, we'll talk to you later. And we'll talk to you about you, to you in front of you. Oh, so you think it's like maybe like a compulsive thing?

Like an OCD thing? Oh, I don't know if it's that. I just have noticing that you're talking through. And I said two, two, two, two, two. That's three. That's a two, two, two. That's three twos. That's three twos. And I did three twos, two, two, twos. The number 23. Yep. Wait, what? That was a stupid movie. Was that that fucking Jim Carrey movie? Yeah, that was a Jim Carrey movie where he's just like, this number's haunting me. I'm going to die soon. Yeah. I'd actually scared me because I divided my birthday by itself and it was point two three. You divided? Yeah, seven divided by 30. My birthday is July 30th. Point two three. Why did you do that? Because I was freaked out by Jim Carrey. No, but why did you divide your birthday?

I think he did that in that movie at one point, too. Oh. You know? And you were like, oh, my God. Oh, my God. The number 23 is coming for me, too. Unbelievable. And that movie sucked.

Never seen it. Save yourself, save yourself, a 23 minutes. Oh, I will. I do want to talk about probably the coolest thing I've ever heard in my entire life that people robbed the Louvre. Fuck, I heard about that shit. Yeah, dude. Wait, like, fully robbed the Louvre.

Yeah, and it took seven minutes. They got a ladder, and they got it. in there they took like some like some jewels here's the thing is I I often like find myself when people would be like oh there's professional burglars out there that like do stuff they like oceans 11 yeah like shit like that and I'll be like dude that only that that's only in movies it's not in movies it was in real life movie I would see don't you think like obviously like you don't want to go to jail but wouldn't like a heist to be just fucking awesome dude I can't even begin to explain how cool I think I would be in a heist. Oh my God. Who would you be in the

heist? Would you be like the main heister? Oh no. You would be the computer guy. That's just like, we have T-minus five seconds. I'm in. No, I'm definitely not the guy in the van with all the screens. I'm definitely not there that they call it. Oh, there's the one guy that goes into a manhole and he like connects to the wires and he's like, you're good. You're up and running. You're up and running and you have T-minus 38 minutes. Yeah, yeah. That's not me either. I think I'm one of the guys that's in it i'm maybe the guy that like drills oh i might be like you know like how in ocean eleven there was the little like the little like asian guy that could like fit into like the small spaces yeah you are very uh limber yeah i'm pretty nimble i might be able to be him he comes

i'm not asian but you're not um but yeah uh there was there was like a couple of people i forgot how many people but they like had a ladder they put it up to the second floor they broke a window uh they like cut into it or some shit Did they use the like Like the Grinchin Pick up the piece of glass I was gonna say like catwoman She like draws it like that

And she goes like that and takes it off Probably I have no idea And that's pretty cool Set off alarms People who are in the museum started like running Because it was like alarms going on Can I ask you a question Broad daylight to do this is crazy

Yeah Why like why not wait till nighttime Or that's when the security is like really on Yeah because there's no one else in there But if there's a bunch of people running around It's probably harder to get around Lasers what do they have lasers where they have to like spray like spray and they could see the laser

you know what i'm talking about yeah i do i have seen a lot of movies yeah i know um but yeah they stole a bunch of stuff and they're like at large you know how much money they stole no well i heard they took royal jewels yeah you can't polians like jewels you can't which he might have taken from other places so definitely uh you can't account for like the historical importance but around a hundred and two million dollars worth of stuff what the fuck dude how do you even like sell it though i mean black market private sellers no you you you you never seen these black market movies where they go and it's like people are just like quiet in a room and they're just like me that sounds like any auction now that i think

yeah wait what were you gonna say um you have to like break it apart break them down to do jewel like over time you can't just sell a crown because they know they sold the crown right so those things are probably going to be destroyed i mean no i imagine that someone is going to be like they're going to sell it to like a private seller on the black market and they're just like we have this but like why would someone want that because you clearly because they weren't going to get in any other way so they're just like oh this is a really cool thing to own well like to his point if you want the money and you're the person who stole it wouldn't you like break it down so it looks unrecognizable or you can sell it as we stole

this cool thing no one can track us you can buy it no one won't know you have it, wire me $100 million. But you could get caught with it eventually. I mean, only if someone comes into your crib. Yeah. Just like put it behind like a secret wall with a book that you pull out and it opens. I don't get that. You can show only your boys.

You're going to tell me if you came over and I was just like, yo, I got to show you some shit. And you come in the back and I'll be like, it's Queen Elizabeth's fucking. Queen Elizabeth's crowns. Yeah. And you're just like, yo, that's crazy. that. And I'm like, yeah, no one. Don't worry about it. You know, that's cool. It's also a crime. Immediately extort you. Yeah. 10 million are all rat. Exactly. Do you do that to me? Well, I mean, it's easy to do now. I mean, it's an easy money. And it's worth it for you. I want some easy

easy money. Sorry. Don't know that. Billy Joel. Oh. Still don't know it. I know Billy Joel. Well, it's a good song. Um, I would love to have. Wait, wait, wait, wait, So if I have the crown's jewels in my backyard. Yeah. And you show me it. And I show you them. You're going to be like, yo, give me 5 mil. Well, if they're worth like 110, I'd say, yo, give me 5.

Really? Just keep me quiet. Give me 30. What are you going to do about it? Oh, I have 100 mil. Now you're dead. What does that mean? Now you stole something and I'm dead?

And we're in a room together. I have $100 million in the crowns jewels. Yeah, but what are you killing me with? A gun. Why do you have a gun? Because I have $100 million. $100 million. What does that have to do with that? If I have $100 million, one of the things I'm spending money on is probably a gun.

Sure. Or security. I would wait until we weren't in the room. Right. Oh, yeah? I would wait for the opportune time and go, hey. I put, I poisoned you. Why'd you poison him?

Because I knew you were going to extort me. Okay. So, all right. So you're holding me up. Drop it. Sign this non-disclosure agreement from your time here. although it doesn't cover crimes Oh my god

The NDA See like this is what I'm saying Like this is why I can't be a criminal Because I'm Yeah I mean I wouldn't I wouldn't want to do this So you're saying I do think that Robin the Louvre was cool

I mean also mean Mean mean mean mean Like there was probably a kid there That was like looking like Oh those are the crown The Queen's jewels I think it was like an area Where there weren't people

Really? Yeah and like that that was like the whole point kind of if you could they had a getaway van and they torched it that's so cool it's so cool i want to torch a car hard like so bad what you want to blow up a car no no hear me hear me new business idea frankie i'm not doing this again come please please you do this every episode please but please you might actually like this one you know i won't we're talking about robbing a famous museum listen to me you might actually like this one big escape rooms have happened and become over the last 10 years what they're not they're big

they had their moment it's over no they're still around who where's the closest one to you not that far you made it up no i'm serious i when was the last time you went 2015 but that's that's just me though there are people that go more regularly no one goes there big team building exercises for for for no one wants to be there listen Like a situation like that Where it's like an escape room But the stimulation is A theft

A burglary Like a like a like a like a like a like a like a art heist or something Right you have to like get out without them noticing you Right That would be fucking cool dude That just sounds like a haunted house Which you're cool You're helping me

You're just fucking you're driving my point home And follow me I'm looking up more Loufax. Oh. About the heist. Oh. You got anything good?

No. Good. So they torched the van. They took the jewels. Yeah. And I guess they're at large. Which I never understood that expression either. They're out there on a big.

Yeah. Yeah. Where does at large come from? I don't know. It doesn't really make a lot of sense to me. But yeah, I would rob a bank. You've said this. You've said this before.

It's not their money. I mean, technically, you are, you're taking. from people. Am I? I don't think I am. In theory. I'm not. If this room is a bank.

Yeah. What do you think you're taking? What do you think that there's cash in a bank because you have it? That's not your money. No, but there is cash in a bank. They don't hold your money in a bank account. Like, that's not what that. It's not Gringott's.

I wish it was Gringots. That sounds pretty cool. So would I. I would love to get on a roller coaster to go get my money. That would be cool. You see how he's a roller coaster to get his money. He's got to go all the way to the top because he's got big, big, big mounds of money. Not what I meant.

I'm not looking at him. I'm not looking at him. Did you see the movie? I did. The ride would cost more than what's in the bank account. Probbs. Probably, yeah. I would kind of rob a bank, too.

Is that bad? I think that's totally fine to rob a bank. But not in today's society. I'd like to rob a bank in the mid, like the old west. I want a burlap sack that has a dollar sign on it. I want a burlap sack that has a dollar sign on it. I want a burlap sack that has a dollar sign. I want to be like, you know, walking...

Wearing black and white. Wearing black and white. And just the bandana, you know, over from my nose down. Or the thing over my eyes. The domino mask. Is that what that's called? It's the second time that's come up in two weeks. What was the first time?

When he was the Ninja Turtle. Oh, right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, exactly like that. Oh, my God. Robbing a bank would be a thrill. All right, all right. Let's act this out.

I'm a teller. You're a bank robber. All right? I would do the slide the note. Oh, you're not going. big going big going big making a scene why would i do that scare people i don't want to scare anyone i just want to leave with the money okay so i'm a teller oh this is the old west so they frank there wouldn't be uh there's no nothing to act out i would just do this and then go

You're horrible I'm getting robbed I gave you a note It has a number on it I am not good Excuse you You could be a little more polite About this sir

There's the polite part Yeah That's how I would be I just be like You could be nicer Do you think that Any part of you If you were at the bank

And someone showed up And was going to rob the place And They had a gun But you were suspicious yourself the gun you're like I don't know if it has a real gun and they're like everybody get on the ground and you get on the ground and now

but you clearly have an opportunity to tackle this guy and save the day you taking it? Who else is in the room? It's a good question. Because if I'm in the room and it's like you two are also in the room I am confident that if I go make the shot

take a shot you guys will join in. Now if I look around and it's fucking Betty White and fucking I don't know why The first name that came in my head was Vera Farmeja. Who the fuck is that? Who's Vera Farmeja? She's an actress.

Betty White, dead, and Vera Farmeja. Is she alive? Yeah, and she's also, like, in shape. Like, she would be, she'd probably do more damage than I would. So, okay. But, like, it really depends on who's in the room. Right. And you would give us eyes like, you know, I'm going to jump on this guy.

I'd be like. I'm laying down like this and I'm and we're going like yeah are you letting me go first no no no like I'm letting you know like yeah this is what we're going to do but how many there's so many variables that I need to know like paint a better picture Joey

there's a guy in a bank one guy in one bank how big is the bank how would we be in two banks at once I'm saying like one guy that's what I meant one guy with what kind of gun hand gun semi-automatic or automatic I assume semi

okay did he fire off around when he came in no okay where is the gun is it out is it away it's out but it's not like oh actually no I'm saying he told everyone to get on the ground

so he came in and made a scene so he's waving it around yeah he's waving it around okay get on the ground how far away is he from me at first he's far away away but then he gets close so now he's at the you were at the teller that's like next to to where he is and he's going give me the fucking money and you're on the ground how am i on the

ground you're on the ground face down arms out arms by my side you're just kind of like here what am i wearing athletic wear oh uh and the guy's back is to you because he's he's at the teller like this and you're like over here but you're on the ground so and so you have initiative and now you have to roll a dexterity check. I like how you're doing this. That's what it sounds like. Yeah, basically. You guys playing D&D right now is what it sounds like.

I don't even know what any of that. We just played Dungeons and Dragons without realizing, yeah. But like, oh, is that how you play? Basically, yeah. But keep going. I like it. So then, all right, so. Pull up a D20.

You're laying on the ground, right? You're in athletic wear. Okay. You don't have any weapons. Okay. This dude has a gun. It's in his left hand. All right, okay.

Right. All right. So, what do you want to roll for? What you want to roll for? Let's roll for how fast can I get up without him realizing it. All right. So this is a dexterity check. You want a high, like 13 or higher here.

Okay. Oh, this guy's dexterity. My dexterity. Dude, Matt 20. So he has no idea you're coming. Okay. So you have the element of surprise. Clearly, his back is turned.

Okay. That's me sneaking. So you can jump on this guy. Okay. Right. And gun is in his what? Left or right arm. I said it's in his left.

It's in his hand. Yeah. He's got it here His arm is a gun No, it's not Okay He's holding a gun It's in his left hand

And he's like this It's not down It's like at the thing Okay So he's pointing it at the Now you don't know if he's got another one Is the teller behind glass? Yeah yeah

Okay Fully behind glass Let's say no Let's get some danger Okay I like danger So You know

There's other guys In the bank So then Hold on Hold on! Fuck! There's other guys in the bank, but you don't know if they're brave or not. All right, so I'm running a bravery check on everybody else.

No, no, it's a perception check. Perception check on everybody else. Wait, what is perception check? So, like, you look around and, like, your surroundings and, like, what's going on? Okay. So you're trying to see if other people are brave. Oh, okay, so this is a low role that's like, oh, it's a bunch of old people. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

So perception check. Oh, alright. All right. So there's maybe one other guy. He's in his mid-40s. Okay, okay. And, like, you don't know. Okay.

So I give him a look. You give the guy a look. I give the guy a look. So he sees him up. Does he get up? Did you get up? I got up. I'm sneaking out of this guy.

I got a 20 dexterity, baby. He's right next to you. So what about your strength? He could be a strong guy. Could be a strong guy. Can we run a strength check? Go to strength check for you? For me, for Frank.

And then for him. So in the moment, because, you know, it's an anxious situation. This is our strength role. 17. You're feeling good. I'm pretty good. I'm strong as hell. I'm strong as shit.

We can see how strong the guy is. We can see how strong the guy is. Here we go. Throw him on his head, Frank! Throw him on his head! I'm beating the brakes off this dumb ass. That's why he needs the gun. That's why he needs the gun.

That's why he needs the gun. Right. So how do we roll for like how good of a shooter this guy is? And has he killed before? We don't know. Has he killed? Experience check. Sure. I don't know.

No experience. How much experience? No experience at all. I'm basically going up against Betty White. Yeah. That I'm fucking... Very, very advantageous roles. So how do you end D&D?

You go, okay, this is done. Well, now you like... No, D&D never... Yeah, never ends. It literally, it's a campaign that goes on forever. But you keep, like, going with these decisions? Sort of. Forever, basically.

It's always going. Like, eventually you go, like, oh, all right, we got him. We got the gun. He's restrained. And you just keep going. Oh, okay. It is... I played it once.

It's kind of fun. But also... I just had fun. Yeah, no, I play it, I play it. You need to, like, there is someone that is watching this. It's just like, please let me make D&D for them. Yeah. All right.

So, so he's not strong. He's not experienced. What do I do now? You're strong and you're fucking limber. You're feeling good. You have the advantage. And you got a natural 20. So you can start the attack if you really want.

Okay. So I guess, I guess I'm going to attack. But as I'm going to attack, I'm going to grab one arm around the neck. The other is going to. Frank. It's going to get a little harder. You have to. grab the gun. Go full for the gun? Of course. Okay, so I go full for the gun then.

Can we get an experience check on him now? Yeah, that's actually that's a good point. I just revealed that. If you go for the other arm. No, this is more of a dexterity check, I guess, or like hand-eye coordination. Hand-eye coordination, we can do that. So let's see how we're feeling. Okay. Okay. That's not bad. That's good. That's good. I mean, I think we said that the base level was 13. Yeah. For this guy. I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, you can get it. Okay. And with the advantage because of the Nat 20 let's say he gets it yeah he's gonna get him all right so I get the gun yeah so you save the guy I save the guy yeah I'm a hero yeah now now I turn the gun on them and I want the money because I'm the strong alpha now oh now you're robbing the

I'm the robber right this would be a persuasion check just be like you know since I saved you can you give me $10,000 or something what an anti-hero What are we rolling for? I don't think they give it to it. All right. All right. I'm going to do a scenario for you now. Oh, now we're just full-blown.

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You're good at that. All right. So I'm sitting the scene here. Okay. It's a Monday morning. It's a Monday morning. Monday morning, and you're coming from the gym. Right.

You just did leg day. Okay. Okay. So I'm a little shaky leg. You're a little shaky leg. You did hard leg day, too. Yeah, I'm shaking. You PR'd on squats.

Okay, so I'm like Bambi. And you PR'd on, you probably wouldn't do that. Do what? I was going to say leg press. Okay. You do leg press? I can't. It's not my...

Exactly. That's why I said you wouldn't do that. All right, so you PR'd on leg day. So you're feeling good, okay? You walk into the bank. Oh, this is after the gym? Yeah. Okay.

Yeah, because you run your errands after the gym, you know? So it's like a similar situation. It's like 9.45 on a Monday morning. Okay. Okay? Yeah. You walk in, you know, you're greeted with your glass of champagne at your Swiss bank that you go to. Am I your Switzerland?

No, you're here Got it They have UBS Chains in America Okay Everyone down Guy walks in With an AK

Fires it in the air like this Fires it Yeah, does that How many shots Ghr Same question Ghr 8

Okay Fires him in the air Looks at you and says Get on the fucking ground and uses the butt of the gun against the back of your legs and you fall to the ground. Okay? I'm writing everything else. He goes up to the teller and he says, give me everything in the safe.

Ask away. Is that my role? I guess so. But I'm going to give you minus four to dexterity because of the gym, unfortunately. unfortunately. And minus, make it minus five because he's got, he's got hit in the back of the leg. I haven't counted in that, minus fours. It's, it's a hefty penalty. Okay. All right. Right. What is that, what is your position called in this whole thing? He's the game master. No, technically because you're being the game master right now. I'm just helping him what he should also be doing. We're both game masters right now.

But like, what's my role? I, like, think of things to do. Yeah, you got to tell you, I'm walking you through it. Oh, okay. Okay. So the guy, you just described, basically the same situation. You ask questions about the situation, me, or anything. How tall is this guy? Ooh. Or how big? How big and wide?

I would say 510-190. Okay. Ween. We're very similar builds. Sure. Yeah. He's got a couple inches on you, but sure. Okay.

Is he strong? He did fire around that AK. Was it with ease? Could we tell? That'd be a perception. Was it one-handed? It was one of these? It was one of these, but he looks very uncomfortable.

Okay. Looks very uncomfortable. I mean, it is an AK. It's an AK-Quachio-Cete. Right. Is he wearing a disguise? He's wearing a rubber mask. Of what?

Freddie Kruger. Okay, so now I would give him a disadvantage to sight, right? He would have a little bit of sight disadvantage. Write a site check. Sure. Sure. What is his site check? Let's see.

Let's make that one to D12 because it's like... I don't know what the difference is here. Actually, I don't know what I just said. Let's just get rid of that. Wait, hold on. That says total 14. Does that mean like this is out of 14? No, this is out of 20.

You can roll 3 dice at the same time and add him up. Yeah, you could just roll up on this. Oh, okay. So he's got a 14 site. So it's not that bad. It's not hurting him that much. I mean, he's losing some sight, though. He's losing some side.

So make it minus 2. Yeah, so what about his hearing? What about his hearing? Can he hear me creeping up on him? All right, we can see, we can see. We do a hearing check. Very good. God, he's like a fucking bat.

Very good. Shit. Very good, very good. Very good hearing. You're in trouble. Oh, no, I have it. Do I have anything on me? You do.

What do I have? You have your phone. You have your wallet, which that carries some weight. And you have, you were jumping rope at the gym on leg day. So you have a jump rope, a metal one. Okay. What am I going to fucking lasso this guy? All right.

He has very good hearing. His sight's not that great. He's got an AK. Is there anyone else around? Yeah, full. Packed, packed. It's a packed. Packed bank.

Is there any dudes in there that I could probably get some help from? Yes. Oh, great. Do I know any of them? Yes, you do. I know them. You know one of them. Is it you?

Nope. Got it. Okay. It's Ray Lewis. It's Ray Lewis? These should have been some rolls. We're getting really, uh... Yeah.

Getting real loose. All right, no, no, no. All right, hold on. Someone is in there with it. If it's a roll over 15, it's Ray Lewis. This is... Now you're getting into it. If it's a roll between 10 and 15, I'll come up with somebody else.

If it's under 10, I'll come up with somebody else. Okay. Oh, my God, it's a two. Okay. That's bad. All right. This is bad. Oh, my God, it's Clay Aiken.

It's... It's bad. Oh, my God. It's Clay Aiken in there. Sure. We could go... Which I would be very excited. Honestly, no, Clay Agen, I think Clay Agen's pretty tall.

Clay Aiken might be in the 10 to 15, yeah. All right, so under 10, you're in there with... This is under 5. Bruce Valanche. Whoa. I mean, Bruce is a big guy. Old now. Old bastard now.

Okay. Oh, my God. Am I, what's my fighting ability? Like, do I have any background? Sure, you took boxing. How good am I? I would say you're... Can we get a boxing check?

Get a boxing check on Joe. Let's see, yeah, let's see a history. check how much he remembers when he was boxing. Sure. Oh my God, I'm a fucking champion. Cash's Clay. Very high. Some differences, but you're close enough. Sure. I can

knock this guy the fuck out, because he can barely see me. Sure. Okay. But the only other person in there with you is Bruce Valanche. Okay. You do have a disadvantage on attack because of your legs, though. Yeah, but what does that mean? Like, my speed? Yeah, it all bunches into one. It depends on the scenario.

All right, I don't know. It's tough. so here's my plan and I don't know how to ask this in the confines of this game but I have like a phone or I have a wallet right and this guy's got the fucking hearing of a fox slash bat yeah so my plan right now is it and I have a and I have a fucking 19 out of 20 boxing so I could knock this guy's block off but I just got to get there but he's got very good hearing so my plan take my wallet throw it across the room so he hears the wallet turns I get up and I knock his fucking head off

That's a good one But how quick could you get up Because remember you used it like that My life is on the line And again I'm throwing this thing And then I'm attempting to get up So as I'm getting up He's going to hear the sound

Turn towards the sound I'm behind him Okay so first we're going to see We're going to roll to see if this wallet trick worked That's what we roll for you Okay how do we do that Well you got to see Will the wallet trick work

over he has very good hearing so he can tell a difference between a wallet and something real no i was going to say like very good hearing this would give this a bit of an advantage to work because he will hear the wallet right okay that's why i'm saying so let's say 10 oh my god it's not working no it didn't work not working it's a 30 out of 20 is basically i'm throwing the wallet across and he's looking right at me like what are you doing yeah yeah yeah didn't work okay yeah you're in trouble didn't work so i can't do that and now he's kind of locked on to it different plan yeah yeah didn't work. Now, do I, do I, what are the chances that me and the guy, oh, me and Bruce Valanche,

we both know sign language? I mean, what, what, but you don't, I don't think there are any roles to check if you know sign language. Because I was going to be like, yo, if I tell him like, bro, scream and I'll knock this guy's block on. So in this scenario, right, we establish that you two know each other. Me and Bruce, so I'm assuming that you two have a cell phone. connection or, or each other's numbers.

Can I text. Can you text Bruce Valanche? Can I text Bruce Valanche? But then we got to see if does the text send up, does it, is Bruce Valanche's phone on vibrate? Roll a D4 for that one. What is, what is these things? They're different, like, different dice have different scenarios.

Yeah, but we're just, when we're having fun like this, I just always do D20s because it's like just easy. Um, what are the chances that I can reason with this guy? Is he an open-minded robber? So persuasion check? We could do a persuasion check. Can I persuade him to let me, like, go to the bathroom at least? All right.

Let's see. Let's see how open-minded. Okay. 16. He's kind of open-minded. That's pretty good, honestly. So maybe I tell him, like, look. And wait, no.

Do a roll for Joey's charm. How charming is Joey? This was the persuasion check. I would say, I'll be like, look, I really need to take a dump, take my cell phone, so I don't call the cops. Just let me go to the bathroom. I'll come right back. And then what's your plan?

Yeah, I guess he said, yeah. I don't know. Now you're just in the bathroom. Just in the bathroom. Well, I think that... Oh, so here's the plan. Here's the plan. I go to hand him the phone.

I grab the gun. Oh, okay. Okay. That's scary because when you hand him the phone, he's positioned in front of you like this with a gun like this. But he has to take it from my hand so I can get close enough to grab the gun and jump out of the way. And it isn't AK. it's not a handgun, a little harder to maneuver up close.

So I'll give that to you. All right. So you're rolling to grab the gun. Yeah. All right, wait, what's the level of which he grabs a gun? I think like, this guy, can we get a strength check on this guy? Sure, why not? Let's get a strength check on him.

He's, all right. He's in the middle of the pack. It's middle of the pack, but you're also not using your biggest strength, which is your boxing ability, apparently. I will get there. If I grab the gun, he's toast. I would say with the disadvantage because of leg day, but the fact that it's a two-handed weapon, let's do above a 12.

Above a 12, he grabs the gun. Okay, okay. Here we go. Here we go. You're dead. It's bad. All right. Now,

any bad rolls. Now, so you go to grab the gun and it doesn't work. Does he, yeah, he fucking butts you in the face. Oh, he like knocks my fucking block off.

I'd say he butts you. Yeah, I think you're dead. Yeah, I think it's probably, it's a wrap. Let's just do a check to see if he shoots Joe in the face.

Yeah, what are the chances that I've distracted him so much with my horrible, attempt that Bruce the lanch jumps on his back and then I get up I'm missing three teeth and I spit blood in his eyes and then what about your boxing ability Joey then I start punching his lights out I think this would probably be your last role for hope so it's above a 17 I was thinking I was 17 that's a hard roll a 17 and up yeah 17 and up 17 and up Joey you're gonna die don't I'm not

I'm gonna kill him. Yeah! Let's go! So Bruce Valence jumps on his back. Jumps on his back! I get up, I spit blood in his mask, and I start teeing off on his head. Why are you spitting blood?

Because he knocked me in the face with a gun. Gotcha, okay. Oh my God, D&D is fun. You know, it is. It's a lot of fun. Wow, wow, wow. Oh, there's someone. We should do a D&D video.

I've suggested that before, and Joe was like, Pff. Yeah, I know. Did I? Yeah. I've seen people like comment on our Instagram. posts once before and been like please let me set up I'm a great

DM let me set it up for you I do a horror like nights with my friends like we do a horror scenario is it spooky? That's interesting that's fun I had a good time well there you go folks oh yeah the loom got robbed

yeah who cares suddenly I don't get a Joe and Bruce Valanche have something to say about it you put me and Bruce Valanche in a bank and you're safe I'll take a couple hits to the face with the end of a gun, though. By the way, I have seen, the age demographic of our fans. No one knows. Google Bruce Val.

You don't know Bruce. I was about to say, I don't know. He was always the center square on Hollywood Squares with Tom Bergeron. Look up Bruce Valanche. Bruce Valanche. There's your hero. There's our hero. Bruce Valanche!

There's the hero, Bruce. Is saving us. That's it. That sucks with my dad and a wig. Got it. Bruce. You look better on it. Bruce.

Yeah, this guy. So I get up. I make a stupid attempt. He jumps on the guy's back. It's just enough for me to get up there with my shaky legs and knock his block off. Bruce Valanche. Yeah. Here you go, folks.

Hero of the people. Bruce Valanche. Shout out. Well, there you go. There you have it, folks. That's so funny. But don't forget to subscribe to our Patreon. Patreon.

on patreon.com slash the basemeyard. Keep supporting the show. And yeah, Frank, when they can find you. The Frank Alvers everywhere, patreon.com slash the base vignard. If you're coming to any of the shows, the basemanyard.com slash submit. And we love you. We thank you.

And, uh, yeah. If we're going to find you, Aunt, higher than 10, I could do it. Okay. Higher than 10, Ann could plug. 13. Aunt Priscoe on Instagram. But only one. Yeah, only one.

only one only one but yeah that is all for this week's episode see you next time