The Basement Yard - #530 - Getting Swallowed By A Black Hole

Episode Date: November 24, 2025

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We'd love to talk, business. Welcome back to the basement. Welcome back to the basement yard. How's it going, Frank? What do the kids do? I don't know, but that... What do they do? Not any of that.

What do they do? I don't know. Help me out here. Ask the kid. What do you do, kid? I'm tangled in my wires. That sounded like a metaphor. What do they do?

Like, oh, this, they do this, right? Yeah, check pulse. Is that, is it a check? Pulse or is it like that's ice in my veins ice in veins so this is checking pulse well this is checking pulse yeah this is checking this is what ice in my veins right I've I've never felt a pulse before it's so hard to keep up with like what's in and out now I now I understand why our parents hated us so much I don't think that was the reason I think there was other things there were so many things that we had that like were like inside jokes for us that like

our parents didn't have you know like what uh that's a good question yeah there were some there were some that like how we hate the kids do the six seven thing yeah i know that was the first time that i'm kind of like oh god i'm so dude and it's like a universally hated thing amongst parents six seven yeah like i was at a uh we brought ruby to a kid's birthday party and one of the kids there was like his older brother and he went like six seven six seven and all the parents in the room groan and we like looked around and it was like that just makes it stronger though But the kids didn't, like, I don't think they realized that we hated it that much. But it was just like- Oh, we, you were part of the groaning.

I didn't. Oh, my God, you're groaning now. I think I groaned, yeah. I think I groaned a little bit. But, like, there was a beauty in the camaraderie of the hatred of this trend. That's beautiful. I know teachers hate it. How do you know that?

All over the classrooms. I'm well-versed in the teacher-vers. For why? How? How and why? Well, I know things. This is your job. Yeah, like he's in classrooms.

I mean, how do you know? Do you know teachers? My mom's a teacher. My friends are teachers. Oh, your mom's a teacher. So your mom tells you like, man, six, seven is out of control. Antonio, what is this? What's this, Antonio?

What's this? What is this? What is this? No more Moghered is for me. What, um, are you drinking a Red Bull? I didn't open it yet. Oh, okay. But now I feel like, now you have to.

I mean, now's the time. What age? I swear to God, if you do that in the middle of a conversation. What age does you? your mom teach? These are really good questions. You don't know, so you know she's a teacher, you don't know whom she teaches. Young.

Okay. That is, that is all of them. That's all of them. Youngest. Youngest? Like, Reke? Second, second. That's not youngest.

By definition, that's not young. The younger ones. So it's like very early. Yeah. K through three. Sure. Okay. Sure is definitely not what I was looking for.

All right. If you could be a teacher, bro. And you could get paid, well, I don't know what? was I saying that? I don't know. You'd be a teacher, but you're teaching K through three, four through eight. That ain't it. Or nine through 12th. What are you doing? I know that the brackets are all over the place, but I just tried. I think I would probably go through like kindergarten through third grade. Only because I think first graders are annoying as fuck. Bro, fourth through eighth is probably devastating. Yeah, that's a tough one. And I'm worried about

teaching high school because I don't know that I would know the curriculum that well I know, I know, I know, I should have. So you said said four through eight. Do you sneeze in your hand, by the way? No, I do I do you. I do, I sneeze into my elbow. Like, I have to, I like panic because sometimes I sneeze into my hand. I'm like, why did I do that? Yeah. And I'm like, but people tell you like cover your mouth, like don't sneeze like this. What it's like a cute thing that I do. I think I've told you this when we're in the car and Becker and I are holding hands

when I'm driving. I'll take her hand and I'll sneeze on her. Yeah, that's cute. That is disgusting. Yeah. Let's be very clear about something. She does not like. She don't like. She does not. You know, she said like and like if I have to sneeze in the house, I'll like find her and sneezing her hand. And like try to sneeze on her and she runs away. Hey man, modern romance. Yeah. This is what it is. So you think fourth through eighth would be the most annoying. Absolutely. Bro. Are you just trying to think about when you were the most annoying? Just anybody. Like, I think that's when I was the most disruptive. And so were you. Is that, is that puberty? What is puberty? Puberty is like six, seven days, seven? I don't want that one. Yeah, I don't want

puberty either well six to yeah six and seventh grade would that's in that bracket you know how they say puberty is like oh when your hormones are raging i never really felt like that well first of all my nipples were budding yeah we knew what was going on with your nipples yeah my nipples your your your budding nipples told the story that your body was not writing i think i have a little bit of like the gyna comastia stuff not like like fat tits yeah it's like you get a little fat nipples like i think i kind of no you had that when you were they were way fatter when i was going through puberty. In puberty.

Yeah, I was... I had puffed. That's fine. Puffed, brother. It looked like someone, like, I'm not kidding. Like, someone glued ringdings to your chest.

I don't think you know what ringdings are. I don't know, right. Maybe not ringings. Like the Antriman's chocolate covered donuts. You know how they're, like, kind of like rubbery? Those are so good.

They're also like black brown, so... They're also dog shit. They're disgusting. I hate those. Yeah, they're not good. But, like, you had, like, it looked like someone put, like, a lifesaver under your shirt.

yeah kind of it's yo I'm not kidding like puffy and like the area like the middle part of the nipple the ariola was like in so it was like a valley all right I don't have inverted nipples you did I don't know that I did

I think that it was all just puffed out dude if someone showed me your nipples in seventh grade just like a picture they would look like a pair of tits all right my friend has

inverted nipples yeah yeah is he insecure for other things probably no i meant for his well he's an adult with inverted nipples what exactly is an inverted nipple can we clarify i i would assume it's like a dimpled nipple like it's like a like a nipple is in there it's like like dimpled nipple dimple it's like a nipple but like this dimple yeah wait is that yes yeah that's yeah that's yeah a dimple there's not a joke in there i'll find it I kind of have a feeling that like like high school has got to be way harder because they're at an age where like

fourth to eighth grade I can like bark at them be like hey don't cut it out yeah nine to 12 there's a chance they might be taller and bigger than me yeah and they could fuck me up they still listen do they I mean you can kind of like reason a little more

like someone who's in sixth grades seventh grade who's just like you know just crazy i feel like it's harder like i didn't like listening to any teachers i feel like it's probably harder now with the onset of social media because like inside jokes are like nationwide and worldwide now like when we had inside jokes it was like in a classroom i mean bro this thing this was worldwide this was oh my god the hand pussy you did that do you ever guys make handpussies yeah i've seen a hand vagina yeah dude you were like you like oh you're like whoa yeah guess what it doesn't teachers would be mad too but hey stop the They knew when we were making pussies at them.

You want to make one? You want to make a pussy? Let's be very clear. Doesn't look like that. Yeah, no. Maybe I feel like the OBGYN when they got you cranked open. Maybe. You know what I mean?

You're in the stirrups and they're opening you to check everything. Maybe it looks like. What are those things called that like open vaginas? Oh, the clamp? Yeah. Clamp. No, there's a word for them. opener open it keep going i don't know you'll find it does it does it look because i i mean i've

never been i think it's called like uh forceps speculum no that's not what i was thinking no that's how i don't care forza were you ever in the room for something like that like during childbirth stuff where they had to like check her out yeah like do they how i don't think i ever saw when they had to like mechanically open it yeah it's like a car check yeah i didn't see that Like, they had to take it out of the trunk, tie the fucking, you know. He's taking the cranking. It's kind of a wild. It is insane.

What a compromising position. What a compromising position. And it's crazy what women go through. Bro. Isn't it crazy? We go to the doctor and it's like the doctor like hold your balls. He's like cough. Cough once.

That's the extent. Bro. If I had to be like basically like in a rocket ship with my legs up and the doctor's cranking open. Lay back. Let me get in. Like it's got to be wildly. invasive. Oh my God. You know, I can only am, I mean, I've been examined, like, in ways that the normal man does not have to get examined for medical things. Let's make that very clear.

And, like, that's, that's uncomfortable for me. So I can imagine it's just like, a routine visit. Get up on the stirrups, brother. Yeah. Like, if it's, if, if, if the way that you're going to the doctor is the same, the way that someone like mounts a horse. Yeah. Crazy. It's probably uncomfortable. Insane. Yeah. Have you got a finger in your butt yet? No. me neither yeah i guess we should probably ask no me neither um no i haven't i mean i've definitely like washed my butt pretty hard and like accidentally fingered your own asshole dude fingered's crazy like i'm not like my whole finger was in there that's not what i stop me stop me when it's gotten into your ass realistically okay

well you should start from the other side because it's only going to get shorter like if you you start at the top wait what well stop me and I'm like well it's started the other side okay no no I'm saying like I hear what you're saying but like I would say a like all right I'm going up a third of the nail a third of the nail oh brother yeah I feel like it would have been easier to start from the top yeah you can just say stop at me I don't how fast he was gonna go I think I was gonna go fast with my finger I bet you weren't I was not um but yeah just like you know I meant by the doctor. Yeah, no, doctors never fiddled around in my...

I mean, fiddled is the non-medical way to say it. Let's make very clear. The only fingers that have been in my ass have been for medical reasons. But they are fiddling. By definition, I don't think... Fiddle has a sense of playfulness and joy to it. Yeah. Like, when you...

Well, you've got to make it fun. No, you don't. Nothing fun about it. Dude, I'm not a doctor. But I imagine it's got to be a little fun. You are correct. You are not a doctor. You are not a doctor.

You go to the doctor and they give you a lollipop. They're making it fun. Dude, I, if that's happening, boy, all the doctors I've seen, that poor bedside manner. Real quick, which, which job has the, no, which place has the best lollipops? The bank. Thank you. Bank lollipops, dude. Those, like, I don't know why, but they're Italian to me.

The lollipops are Italian, and it's like, they have, like, random white in the middle. They're like ying and yang, but never black and white. They're always, like, yellow and white. Yellow, green, white, orange, and red. And sometimes? What are those bank lollipops, dude? And they're kind of soft. Look, what is that?

What is the act? Could you buy bank lollipops? Or is it like, once you open a bank, they reach out and there's like, listen, we see you got a bankie. It'd be really nice if you had some lollipops that no other place has on the planet. I tell you what, I vividly remember going to the bank and... Ridgewood. I went into Ridgewood and I put in my paycheck, which, by the way, no joke. 68 dollars that's illegal we got it joe you're making a lot more money now oh my god

but i put but i put in 68 dollars and then they made a complaint that i didn't have enough in the account and they like there was going to be something dude fuck banks dude i took eight lollipops i was like i'm leaving here with eight first of all absolutely and i've taken pens from banks frank i'm not leaving without a pen i don't know if banks are still like that if they are fuck you banks yeah second of all it was the same thing. It was just like, all right, here's my first paycheck. And it's like, oh, you don't have this much in your account to cover it. So it won't be ready for three days. And I'm like, I only have 68. Why do you want more from me? I'm already in a bad place. But not even, but not

even that. It's just like, they do the thing where it's like, well, you need the funds in there to account for. And I'm sure there are people that work for banks that are watching this that are just like, I can explain. I don't want an explanation. No one wants to know. I have $68 to my name and you're telling me that that's not enough. And I should be charged for. being poor already I'm gonna we're gonna play a quick game of guess the shirt

that I was wearing I have a picture of my mom and I at the bank when she when I cashed my first like working paycheck like on the books paycheck I was wearing a graphic tea

I'm gonna give you three guesses to guess at least in the realm of which I mean it was Marvel no DC no sports Joey you think I was wearing

a sports graphic tea I don't I mean I've I've exhausted my options here. No, there's other, there's other avenues. Was it like a pack sun type of vibe? No. Was it like a cheeky like, no.

If you're reading this, you're too close. No, like the man, the myth. Yeah, some sort of that. No, it was it a spray painted shirt? No, it was a reptar. Let me ask you a question. Why did you think that out of all the things that exist in the world that I was going to guess, the dinosaur from Rugrats?

Like, were you that confident and I was going to pull that out of my hands? I thought you would at least be able to say like, oh, it was something like cartoon related. I was going to go to cereal box next because I know you had a couple of... I mean, you're moving in the right direction at least. Serial boxes is going towards Rugrats? Somehow, in my head? Absolutely. Ant, do you know who Reptar is?

Yes. Okay. He's very tapped into like... The original weird looking chocolate bar. Remember the Reptar chocolate bars? It was like you bite into it and it was green. And now you have those Dubai chocolate bars? Yeah, those are gross.

Can we talk about something? dark chocolate sucks my fucking little balls sure we can talk about that hate that hate dark chocolate that's all I have that's all you got it's just so like not milk yeah that is correct

I was just ready to like prepare a statement that Dubai chocolate bars look like poop from a butt like they look I'm not even kidding like I understand that there's certain food that looks unappetizing but then you eat it and it's good we talked recently about Yep. I can't even imagine a world where a Dubai chocolate bar tastes like anything other than the dog shit that it looks like. It literally like, it's like hairy. Yeah. Like people open up and it's like, look at this. And I'm like, I'm like, I'm seeing hair.

When people open it, I'm like, is like it looks like it's something that mushrooms grow on. You know what I mean? Like, it's just like a filthy fucking disgusting poopy butt. A med loves it. I mean, I'm not like. Ahmed loves it There's a word for it. It starts with a K But I forget what it is But it's like It's something

I just don't think The only The only Dubai chocolate bar That I've ever had Was dark chocolate So I was already Just not in a good movie Oh you've tried one?

I have yeah Oh and what does it taste like? The middle I know it's like Pistachios in there somewhere Yeah And pubes I guess Yeah

And there's hair It looks really good Really? Stop Does it not? It looks like you're eating moss Well I will say Why does that look

Good. Are you a deer? I think that we're finding out what, you know, Frank poop's green pretty consistently, apparently. No, but like, tell me that doesn't look like shit. I'm not saying I fucking, like that, no, but you could see why I feel like that is. It's like guacamole. I could, I'm going to give it a second shot when it's milk chocolate, because I just can't. Get some Dubai chocolate bars in here for the boy. I can do that.

Yeah. Because I imagine. Frank eat the poop you know what I mean but like when there there's some that I've seen that are just soaking wet wet yeah like the middle is just sopping soaking wet okay just like yeah wet I get it have you ever seen a cooking show where they're making cakes and all of a sudden they have this um it's like a not a spray bottle but it's like a like an oil bottle you know what I mean or like oil like in the no I'm letting you go it's like a but like a cat but it's clear and they have oil and they go like this like a squirt bottle yeah like a squirt bottle

but there's like two or three holes and they like soak the cake in something you ever see that oh when they wet the cake i love that i have seen that they do that a lot and like ganache dude i love when they make the gaj i do like a ganache the best cupcake i've ever had was uh and unbelievable was a uh irish car bomb cupcake follow me follow me follow me follow me follow me follow me How and why? It was a Guinness like flavored cupcake So they put like Guinness

in it to make the cupcake And then the ganache Was a whiskey chocolate ganache Yeah And then the frosting on top Was a Bailey's cream frosting Dude It'll fucking take your ass

And send it through the conveyor belt Was it alcoholic? I mean all the alcohol was probably cooked off Yeah But like it was Good. That was the best cupcake you've ever had. Best cupcake I've ever had in my own.

That's insane. That's insane. It's so good. Just like a regular cupcake. Regular cupcakes are overrated. I don't like cakes in places. Does that make sense? Dude, when you go to like...

Homemade cakes. When you go to like, listen, all power to like small business owners that have like confectionaries and like, you know, make like specialty cakes and cupcakes, if I go to a bakery and I'm going for cupcakes. If this is the cupcake, there better be at most that much frosting on cockpit. I can't. When they do this I can't. I can't.

It's like, like, how am I eating this? Yeah. Who's mouth do I'm have? Yeah, like you want me to eat this with a snake's mouth. Cobrasnake. You want that TikTok girl's mouth, the one that's fucking giant mouth. Bro, why is that girl's mouth open up like

a bat? It's just like oh. Unclear. It's crazy. She looks like gold bat. Tell me I'm wrong. A little bit. I watched her fit a full can of Fosters in her mouth in front of me. In front of you? You met you met the Yeah, that matter. You met the mouth woman? Yeah, she came on. She came on my thing. Oh, she was on your podcast? I didn't say it. Oh, I've talked to her before. Yeah, I think so. I think yeah. Wait, what? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Both of you guys have met the mouth woman. I haven't met the mouth.

I did, I did, I did talk to her though. You heard how he said, she came on my thing what what did she come on picky boys don't say it no no no oh okay my uh it's a i was trying to say yeah i was trying to like not i was trying to my other thing's like that's where i met her you're a walking billboard it's over so wait i imagine i imagine that her life is difficult because people just say like let's let's see what your mouth can do well she that's like her thing yeah she's like turned it into her thing she came over like we we had her um bananas and like other things and the bananas brother why did you say banana why did you say bananas saying like we had her we all tried to put different things in our

mouths together we were bad at it she was very good and then I ask you a question bananas like at their girthiest are like yeah a half dollar this way oh she could do it sideways yeah like she's a like the monkey phone what's that you don't remember the monkey phone banana oh yeah monkey banana phone dude your mind the places it goes yeah and her husband came in and he saw like all the things and he was like yeah that's usually what people make her do i'm like damn it yeah no i mean you remember um the scene that i think of is uh one of the naked guns where he has the full fucking um watermelon in his mouth i don't remember that turns around he's like oh wait no

that's not that's not in the naked gun that's in one of the movies never mind oh it's a movie called mafia do you know what that is it was a parody on like the godfather and whatnot oh no I think it was I was about to say Leslie man that's wrong I mean she might have been in it she is a comedic actress Leslie

Nielsen Yeah Nielsen Yeah it was him RIP RIP RIP Who are as Joey calls him White King

When have I called him That's the fuck Definitely haven't called him that You know what Let's get to some sponsors After that I mean I don't know where to go From there honestly

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in theory what were we just talking about before it doesn't matter because there's more pressing matters which is apparently there's a black hole that's like eating other galaxies i heard of this what's a black hole right i don't know what is it i think i think a black hole is it is like a break in the space time continuum that just swallows light and matter and it just turns it into dust i don't i think where does it go though i think it's a there's another a side like you go through a black hole because a hole needs a side hole needs two sides that's what makes a hole a hole yeah like you got to go if you're going in a hole there's got to be something in there but like how do we

what's on the other side. You don't, dude. That's the thing. What's it doing with these galaxies? Where's it putting them? I don't know. Like your mouth is a hole and there's two sides. Now you got to chill.

I don't want to talk about my mouth. Why not? Because I know where this is going. I was going to say, like, think about it. Like if, let's say a galaxy is a Twix bar. Milky Way? Or something stupid like Mike and Ikes? Where are you going?

Your mouth is a black hole and it's swole. and it swallows the galaxy mic and ikes it doesn't just stay in your body forever it eventually it goes out somewhere frank a black hole do you know what a black hole is did you like look it up or something i'm just looking up some keep going but a black a black hole from my understanding you know what i don't have an understanding i don't know did you does it travel does it moves It's not just a hole It's a moving How does a hole move?

Bro It's like those like wily coyote Like when he like Draws a hole on the wall And he pulls it And then pulls it across Literally what is it I'll give this fact about it

Which I didn't know So black holes range in size From tiny structures Comparable to a human cell To giants and billions of times More than the mass of the sun So you're tell Whoa

Stop it First of all If it's billions of times Larger than the sun We could be in a hole right now Deep in a hole. Well, no. If we got in a hole, we'd be going.

It'd be a big problem. It'd be a big old fatal. Who's to say? I mean, we could be one side of the hole. That doesn't mean that we're not in. But I think they figured out that within the hole, like, it's like, it's a hole. And then when it gets in there, it's like, you get eaten up. It's like a charlack pit.

No, it's not. It's the opposite. The gravity is so intense in a black hole that every, like, let's say, centimeter of your body gets stretched. Spaghetti. You get spigatification. Spaghetti. Spaghetti. You'll become a big of spaghetti meat meat ball.

Why do you guys know that term? I've watched Loki. Science. You're... Also science. This is your job! You're not science! I can't know things.

Also science. Yeah, no, spaghettification, where it stretches your body and you literally are shredded like a piece of spaghetti. I think it being the size of a cell, what does that mean? Yeah, like, I wouldn't know that I'm being, that there's a hole? Well, I get it being big. I think a black hole, a size of a cell is probably not going to swallow it. us. But how does it's got to do something? How does it exist?

Because there are things that are smaller than us in this world. What does it live off of a black hole? I don't think I think it's the absence of light and matter. So like it doesn't live off anything and it just kind of consumes. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I think

like, I don't like black holes. That's racist, dude. Well, I don't like any holes. Right. You know what? I'm not doing my because that doesn't, that doesn't either. But I don't know, like, obviously I've watched, what's the movie? I don't know. Interstellar.

That's the one. And like the black hole there, it's like this whole thing. And he's like floating in this weird purgatory of. If you found out that we could go into a black hole, but we have like an 85% chance, like you could see what's over there and then we can bring you back. 85% chance though. You doing it? Are you fucking crazy?

I'm not doing that. Okay, all right. I thought the are you fucking crazy was like, yeah. No, I want to see what art is out there. I want to see what black hole joey's like. I really don't want to be in a black hole. I mean, but you could go and come out.

Like, you can go and like hang out. You just have an 85% chance. That's 15% chance of Dane. Yeah, yeah, yeah, 85% is pretty good, though. Those are good numbers. Watch this. They are good. And 85, 15, you take it?

He'd go twice. What if it's just dark? Could, good, could. Good. You don't know. I'll do it. You son of a bitch. That's what I'm saying. I'd do it. 85.15? I'll take that. Yeah. I just don't like the idea of like a black hole just like creeping.

Like what happens if it gets, wait, is this one bigger than Earth that we're talking about? Which one? The one that I'm talking about. Like there's a, there's one that's like moving and it's like, first of all, it's eating a galaxy. Obviously it's bigger than the Earth. We're doomed. But that's crazy, dude. I don't know. Like this scares me more than. like real things should scare me. You don't like space.

I don't like space. I don't like underwater. Yeah. Which do you think you don't like more? Space or the depths of the water? Deps of the water, because it's right here. It's closer. I mean, space is right there.

It's right there, but water's right here. Like, I can go and be in the problem. Yeah. Okay. I get it. But also, I guess like... But it's so much smaller than space. Like, this...

sheer size of space scares me that is scary like the idea of like sizeless you ever seen you ever seen those things that are just like it shows like a person in times square say and then it keeps zooming out yeah and it gets to like the milky way galaxy and it's like not even a fucking pixel yeah that fucks me up it's and it's funny because sometimes i see videos like that's like oh you're you're worried about like how you are you're worried about being cringy and then it's it does that and you're real and it's really honestly it helps because it puts it in perspective a little bit and I'm like what the fuck am I doing yeah you know like you're a little scared about doing something or you're worried about something and it's like I get it because

we're all having a human experience and it's like I got worried about this I can't think about the fucking decides the whole universe every time I make a decision but when you really get the perspective you're like damn dude the chance What are the chances that you get to be born? Yeah. It is like... I mean, I think the astronaut that went to the moon said that, like, there was, like, something that happened to them were, like, they got freaked out because they looked at Earth and they were like, everything about human existence is there. Right there.

It's right there. Yeah. And it's like, that concept is fucking freaky. I feel like if space travel became very accessible, not like travel, but if you were able to, like, get right outside of the atmosphere and see earth that I feel like even if I saw it I wouldn't believe what I'm looking at like I'd be like this is not real

how are we in a circle guy well there's a lot of people that don't think we're in a circle they think that we're on a disc you know that too though I'd be like bro whoa flat I just yeah I mean space is fucking crazy yeah I just don't know what else to say I mean like the idea of space that like we're just floating

and we're just moving in like a predetermined path and if we get off that path a little bit we're fucking toast bro also think about as a society as like a planet we have gotten like

like we're very intelligent life forms on earth some of us more intelligent than others some would say but then like when you consider everything else you're like we don't know

literally anything. Well, that's the freakiest quote that I've heard is Neil deGrasse Tyson, which Neil still come on the show. I would love to have Neil in here. God, Neil, we have so many questions for you that we know you can answer. One being, what kind of shampoo you use? He's got good hair, dude. But also, he said, like, we don't know what we don't know.

And like, yeah, that's, to me, that's crazy. Because, like, you can look at something and be like, oh, I understand, like, that's a camera, but I don't know how it works. Yeah. But, like, then there's things about the universe or physics or anything that we just can't, our brain at its current level of knowledge can't even comprehend understanding. I'll go even lower, bro. Phone calls?

Phone calls? Phone calls. Phone calls? We're all pretending, like, phone calls. Are just, like, phone calls. It's become such a normal part of society. How the fucking I hear you? Brother, fuck that.

Cameras? What? Cameras? Cameras? What the fuck? Bro, cameras. There's like a physical thing though. No, no, no, no.

But like, old-timey ones. Where it was like the big bulb that flashed onto a paper or something? I feel like that's way easier to understand. No, dude. Radio. Like radio waves. Radio and phones. Phone calls.

Like radio waves, I don't... Bro, how does a phone call happen? Don't fucking say waves. What's the waves? That's my question. You're telling me I'm calling to someone. I'm talking to someone. Someone on the other side of the planet.

Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. Or even better. You're talking to an astronaut in space? Mm-hmm. How the fuck phone call get there? I can understand that now, but in 1969 where they're like, you know, one small step for man, one giant step for mankind.

How are you? They're up there, brother. Dude. We're here. How am I? Why do I need to call collect in order to fucking reach, you know, Barbara three streets away? and obviously like a phone call figuring out how a phone call works is like I'm sure there's an answer whatever my thing is this how did someone think of that like how did someone be like we'll the

we'll just put it and it won't nothing will be connected and I know that how to say like we figured out a way to transmit a signal of you talking to a tower which goes to another tower and pings to that person. You said a bunch of stuff that I don't have answers to. And I'll be honest with you. I've heard the answers. Still don't make sense to me. I don't think Neil could really help us with phone calls. Well, he's going to get the questions. He's not a telecommunication specialist. He better be. But you know what? Yeah. When you're that smart and famous for being smart, you better have all the answers. And Hank too. Bro. Hank Green. Hank probably knows. Hank probably knows. And he'd probably put it in a way that's everything. He does. And he's good. And he'd put in a way that's

very easily digestible, but also like, fuck you, Hank. Why do you need to know that, you smart bitch? I have such a... Did I ever tell you about how Hank Green will text me randomly? Did I ever tell you that? Hank Green doesn't text me? He will randomly text me a picture of like a duck.

It's kind of cool. And it's always just like... You know how smart you need to be... It's just like so random. That is so funny. You know how smart you need to be to like just send pictures of ducks? What?

That's just... I think like that's such a smart person's thing to do. Why? Because he's probably like the the cosmic randomness that this animal exists on this color palette with this gradient that's tricking our eyes into seeing and existing at the time. I think it's just a duck. No. Hank's not doing it just for the ducking it. I think he's just ducking it. My friend used to send me a picture of his balls

with lettuce on it every day. At 12. Lettuce? Yeah. Your friend, I'm going to say it. Is not Hank Green. Should be in prison. Every day? Every day at 12 p.m. At a certain point, 12 p.m. Were they not working a normal job? Yeah, what's going on? Well, there's, no. Okay, they were lettuce dick. Yeah, just... Balls on lettuce. Remind me.

No, lettuce on balls, sorry. Was it... I'm going to ask some follow-up questions. Was it the same photo? Unclear. I think it was some different flavor sometimes. How long did this go on? Three months.

And at what point did you block his number? It was just like, why you keep doing this? It was really just more the question. So what you're saying is he didn't block his number. I did not block his number. He was my friend Yeah I mean was he

After a while It's like you can only see so many balls Yeah I mean you didn't see so many You saw the same balls That's true With you saw more lettuce than balls That's also true

That's also true Well I can't say That's not my experience with Hank Green It's just ducks It's good Yeah I haven't gotten a duck in a while

I will say that It's just bullshit When was the last time You got some balls balls oh that's been years since i got a pair of balls let me see the last duck i got from hank that seems like a smart person's thing to do to like be so amazed by this is the last duck this was december 2nd so we're almost going on a year wow year with no duck hank that's one duck do you guys want to see them is it a pretty duck well this one's not this is the this is a duck

that's howard the duck yeah it's howard i don't know who that is um then he sent he sent this duck which is a middle finger. I don't think he was upset that day. What else we got? The first one was it... Oh, well, I was so... That was a fuck duck. That was a fuck duck.

Yeah, it was. Wow, he sent you a fuck duck. I honestly was so confused by the original duck that I just sent a duck back. Oh, wait, no. Well, the first text he ever texted me he said, hello, it's Hank Green, and then sent a picture of a sick duck.

Whoa. Like, it's a cool duck. That's that... You know what? I could see. why you'd send that duck. That's a sick duck. That's a really good duck. But then the next time we spoke, he just sent a picture of a duck coming out of a banana. That's a good duck too, honestly. I kind of, I don't hate that one. Peel a duck. At that point, I was very

confused, so I sent something back. It was like a koala wearing a hat. That's not a bad one either. That's not what you send back. Yeah, I mean, if you're responding to a duck, it needs to be better than a duck. So that's what I sent back. And then he sends me a text, three months later of a giant duck building so I sent a duck back and then we had a conversation about just nothing

and then the next time we talked again it was another duck it's just like a very you know it's just one of those things I feel like people like that it's like you know we it's just a thing you gotta do I'm gonna send him a duck right now

we have archaeologists and linguistics that are still trying to decipher some of the you know language and text from ancient Egypt Mesopotamia other ancient civilizations this is what we're doing with our time

sending fuck ducks banana ducks orange ducks all this because we were talking about fucking black holes dude there's something beautiful about it yeah there is there is the kinship that he must feel with you

like maybe the people you know what I hope he's not sending ducks to everyone wow yeah then he's cheating on you I'd like to be the duck he's a duck cheater I'd like to yeah I'd like to be the only duck in his pond now that's I don't want to be that

You can swim in his pond That's an okay way to say it Friendship Lee Yeah Platonic Friendly is the word That I was going with Jesus Christ

Friendshiply Maybe sending somebody else Like turtles Yeah but then again If he is fun But like If Hank Green We're doing 10 minutes

I know Hank Green's getting The air time If Hank Green is sending you a duck Would you be insulted If he sends someone else Like a cooler animal Like a tiger Or a giraffe

No, no, no. I may take a page out of his book, though, and do this. Like, the next person that I give my number to, I'm just going to, like, send a photo with every text and see how long it takes until they're like. It wouldn't hurt you if you found out that he has, like, a rank and file based off of how much he likes someone

based off of his favorite animals, and he hates ducks. I would certainly be confused because I feel like our interactions have been positive. So for me to get the negative duck, Would be very confusing. Like, say, you get a duck, and then he texts me, like, again, like a cool animal. Right. Like a gorilla.

Right. Or an electric eel. Right. Well, how did your mind go there? I'm just thinking cool animal. You ever eating an eel? Oh, yeah. Sushi.

Yeah. It's all right. I mean, it's been cool. Are electric eels? Electric. Yeah, brother. Like, they will, like, electrocute me? Yeah.

And I'll get hurt? Yeah. Can I die? Yep. Really? Oh, yeah. Or is it like a little? No, they can.

You need a lot of them But are they like, they're charged They're charged Don't let it rip Bayblade style Can they can they Like shock me from where you are Like if you're in the water

If you're in the water So it's like Pikachu Yeah Yeah They are They are Pokemon In real life Wait they can throw

Electricity at me Not like Like you would have to be Within close proximity Or touch them Yeah Well if I touch them That makes sense

Yeah yeah So they just have it coursing Through their bodies Is this a real thing? Yes dude Dude, they have to, like, let it go. They have to, like, bz. I imagine, like...

So it's like a porcupine. Because they could, like, kind of shoot their shit. No, porcupines don't... And no, they don't shoot. They actually just kind of like... It just comes out. They do one of those. They, like, arch their back, and they get, like, all whorish.

How many electric eels you think it would take to power a house? Average house. Oh, brother. 200. No. Hundreds of thousands. 16,000 eels. Yeah.

What planet am I? on. I was right. Honestly, if my answer was correct, we could just... Yeah, but we wouldn't because of big energy. Right, exactly. Big energy. We would just start killing eels.

I mean, we could... We could, like, it would be not right. Wait, so does that mean, can I get hurt from an eel? Like, it would really fuck me up if I touch a eel? It could. I mean, if you took your home power, you went to your box and you fucking jam forks in the side. That's 16,000 eels. Do you want a single eel effect?

Yeah, yeah. Would that be nice? A single eel can produce up to 860 volts. That'll get you, brother. I don't know volts. Right. So that's why I was going to go into nearly four times the voltage of a standard plug socket. They are that electric? Yeah, brother.

They'll get you. Boogie, boogie, boogie. Good job. Good job. Can I talk to them real quick? Just tell them what I'm going to say. Shit! That is way more electric than I thought.

So, like, there are people, like, they'll get you, dude. Yeah, I mean, that will, like, literally put you down. If I put you, it'll fuck your day up. God, that's scary. I don't, can, like, a wall socket, I know it can harm a human and it can give them burn. I don't know if they could kill them, though. I mean, I'm pretty sure, like, if your heart gets, like, jumped a little bit, you could go down. Yes, yes, absolutely.

Did I tell you the story about my dad? I got electrocuted? Yes, you have in the garage, right? No, no, no. He got electrocuted because he was, like, holding it. we were doing like a construction job and he was holding on to like an end of a thing and accidentally like I guess forgot what he was holding it and held this and he went and the light turned on like that's how much electricity went through his body that the light turned on I had to be resuscitated I was laughing so hard I've I've gotten an electric shock I don't think technically I've been electrocuted because I think the cute part of it means that there is a it's not so cute it's there's death involved yeah um I've gotten shocked a handful of times nothing like crazy from like Like an outlet. Dude, I used to do, at my old job, I responded to a couple cases where people, like, had third-degree burns up their arms.

Oh, my God. Because there was one in particular. It was in the basement of a construction project in Manhattan. And it was a guy just something blue. And he was right there while he was working on it. And it fucking, like, it was, it was bad. Yeah. Also, while we're talking about this, like phone calls, whatever, electricity?

What the fuck? That one makes more sense. It does, but like, what? Because they can just, they can send it place. They can make it and send it places. Yeah, but like, what? But like, and it's like kind of like a physical thing. It feels yellow.

It does. Well, that's because of Pokemon. But, well, also. And like light bulbs. Light bulbs. But like, electricity feels yellow. It does. It's a yellow.

It's a yellow thing. You know. I think electricity makes sense because that's all like hardwired and you see the wires and everything. what's about adjacent to electricity is how you could just like put your phone down on something and charge it Dude, does it make sense

Or you walk into... There are sometimes you walk into a room And the room can charge your phone Don't know what that means What? I've never heard of that in line That's like a thing going around Can that be good for you?

No, it can't be. Probably not, no, we're dying tomorrow Now the whole place is fucking charged up So now that part I don't understand I don't like, I've never seen it But I heard about it where it's like This magic thing at JFK Where you could like walk through

And like it'll only put up your information on the screen and like someone stands next to you and they walk you at the exact same time but they see theirs and not yours this is some harry potter it really is like i i kind of like i want harry potter to stay in harry potter oh i don't i would love to be a wizard really yeah dude i would love that i mean i go i went to who am i line yeah we do have some why would you murder me we have sponsors uh listen got to be safe out there we have simply safe okay it's a real security system that is going to help you stop a crime before it even starts okay they have 24-7 monitoring and they're going to look after your house for you

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There you go, folks. All right. What are you whispering? He whispers things it's my ears sometimes. That's like the worst time to play a prank I mean, but you can't hear it It's the edit If you're doing it into a microphone

It can make it into the episode Yeah, but they cut my audio out Hope so I mean I said something and he goes Jesus Pranks It is pranks

Good old-fashioned fucking pranks Joey Jesus Christ When the last time you prank someone Be honest Exactly 1999 frank live a little live a little live less

we could get he wants me to die we could get swallowed by a fucking black hole tonight and you're gonna die thinking oh my god I'm turning into spaghetti I should have prank people more been more playful

you're saying I could get swallowed tonight I mean I don't know by a black hole you know yeah and you could turn into spaghetti you're just like oh so what's the word

spaghettified Spaghettiation Spaghettiation That doesn't sound like a bad way to go out I imagine it hurts for a little bit though Getting stretched thin Yeah I would But like it probably happens so quick

That you won't feel anything No? I imagine like Jumanji Where he's like oh His hands get into the game Oh my God good movie Yeah Good movie You ever seen Jumanji

I have seen Jumanji The fuck out of here No you haven't seen shit Not the original Yeah I'm not we're talking You know welcome to the We're not talking welcome to the jungle We're talking

You know Something We're talking the original baby Robin Williams Alan Parrish Yeah I got it Put some respect on his baby

You know those bugs in that movie Nightmares Those bugs are bad When he gets stuck in the floor And the spiders coming toward him No no no no no And he's like what Legitimately my nightmare

Like legitimately The last thing I would want Could we like Get you in a room with bugs We have I held a No no no Like I want

Let's prank Joey Let's get him one day We'd be like Yo we're doing like a filming for like this watch company wants to give you their biggest watch. I can't. At like, oh, we can say like, yo, Rolex wants you to be like their spokesboy.

Spokesboy. You got to go into this room and he goes in a room. We shut the door. He'll either fire me or like, we'll have to throw hands. Yeah, if you guys did that, like, I'm not letting it go. Like, realistically. No, I am not letting it go. I'm being serious.

But, like, realistically. I'm being serious. If you came in here, right, and you, like, had a. tarantula and you threw it on me there will be a reaction what would the reaction be something that I know you will hate and I don't know what it is right now but I will get creative oh like pranking me back that's okay I'd take a prank I'd take a prank I'd take a prank I mean I'm talking about a reaction like it could be like what are you gonna do like fucking like like like put a bomb in

my house or something put a bomb in your house who am I I don't know you're saying the punisher that would be pretty cool the absolute like max that i would probably do is like smash your windshield oh i'd take that honestly i think that's a fair trade like a like a just i'll give up a a a windshield if it means that we can get you in a room just like but i i mean i held a tarantula i'm actually very proud of myself that i did that i'm proud i like held that tarantula in my hand and like i'm thinking about that now

is not good we also held we held a couple bugs we just get the bug guy back let's see if we get And let's, wow, let's get a stink. We still got the bug guy merch. He had merch. Yeah, we still got it. Ryan, the bug guy, I think his name was. I don't know, but it made it over in the transfer of studios, which shocked me. Yeah, yeah.

Well, we respect the people that come in here, Ant. That's not. Yeah, well, sort of. It was on the rack. That's why I made it. Speaking of rack, did you see that? I was like, how are you bringing? What are you talking about?

You see Tom Brady cloned his dog? What does I have to do? With Rex. Nothing. I just thought of a way to move on to something different. Yeah. Tom Brady cloned his dog. Yeah.

I'm going to do it. Stop. No, I'm not. First of all, what? I imagine that costs a pretty penny. Tom Brady's doing it. It's Tom Brady money. Well, there's a conspiracy that, not a conspiracy, but he's like on the board of the company,

so it's like a fucking PR move. Oh, I mean. It literally sounds like Haggerett is driving around. There comes that black hole. Yeah, right? Like, what is that? I don't know what that is. But he's on like the board of this company that, like, clones things, I guess.

Oh, wait, we're doing cloning now? Apparently. Like, we're in cloning. Didn't we clone a sheep like 20 years ago? Am I making that? Yeah, and people were pissed about that. They did not like that. Why?

They were upset about that. We need wool. Yeah. But there's other ways to do that that are not cloning. There's definitely ethical conversations to have around cloning. Is cloning not ethical? I imagine I have no idea

That's a clone All right You don't have to treat him Like not real things Well that's That's the issue That's the issue That people are just like

It's not real The original is the real one That's just a clone whatever I mean if we were running out of wool I think like Cloning sheep There's other ways to do it To do what

Birth them Yeah I'm just saying Like have sheep's fuck And then you get new sheep I mean you can argue That's not really Like forcing two Sheep to

No they don't force them And they don't take one and, like, the other and back their shit together. They, like, put them in a fucking field. And they're just like, it'd be crazy if you guys, the only known sheeps to exist on the planet, had sex. Yeah, they put on, like, some Barry Manolo, and they're like. Barry White might be the music again. Barry Manilow is not really love making music. I don't know why.

I meant to say Marvin Gay. I mean, that's, like. Barry Manelow is more like, I'm 50 drinking a Cosmo at Old Vegas. You know? Old Vegas. At the Copa. Copa. Copacabana.

I just found out, by the way, that I was talking about this place in the neighborhood. You remember Just Arthur's? It was on Steinway and 21st Avenue. It was on the corner. Steinway and 21st Avenue, Just Arthur's. Yeah. Wasn't that like a restaurant? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It was like a restaurant bar. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I just found out. It had the stucco. Stucco. On the outside. You go ahead. Just go.

I don't know. but I just found out it's like a cross from that salon yeah yeah yeah it's on the corner on the corner yes yes yes so it's the opposite corner of that but like I just found out that my grandma would go to church every Sunday and then her and her friends would go right there dude that would just drink Manhattan's

first of all Sunday at 1215 having to Manhattan that's where that's what praise God praise God they were they were they were Yeah, they were praising something at that day. Yeah, that's like a well, that was like a well-known place for people outside of Astoria. Really?

Yeah, like I knew other people that were just like, oh, we'd love to go into Astoria because of Just Arthur's. And I, like, I had to do like a triple take. I was like, that place? Yeah. Like, I've never set foot in it. I don't know if it's even still there. No, it's not. I mean, it like, it left like years ago and then it was something else.

And now I don't even know what the hell is there. I think it's like a store, not a store, but like a place of business or some shit. I don't know. I think what you're referencing is Dittmars. That's not 21st Avenue. I am thinking Dittmars. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Because I was going down more.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, those are delis. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I was thinking Dittmars. You're right. But, yeah, I just found that out. I was like, what? Because I remember, I was like, what was that place? Like, I remember being in there, like, once or twice when I was younger, but it was like a bar slash whatever.

I saw Santa Claus there. You know what I mean? They had a Santa Claus. What? What was he doing there? He was there to see your grandmother and her friends. You watch it. Okay.

Do you remember the first Santa Claus you ever saw? No, but I do remember that my grandmother and her friends had a place, too. Grandparents? Where? The place that your grandma used to go. No, that was where she worked. Oh, she worked there? I thought that was like an old Greek hangout.

It was an old Greek hangout. But, like, she also worked. there. What'd she do? Something. What do they do there? Honestly, I don't fucking know. I'm not even, I think she like did the books. She was an accountant? I don't know. Your grandma with dementia.

Was the accountant? By the time the D rolled in, she was way out of there. She had retired and then that's when the dementia started to like really show. That's when that D train came into the station. Take it easy. I don't like how you're talking about my grandmother. All right? I'll talk less about Santa and your

grandma. If you start to stop talking about my grandmother in the D-Train. All right, no problem. But no, I would go there and she, you know why I know it had something to do with, like, keeping records or books or something? She had so many of those rubber fingers. I love them. I love them so much.

I'd turn them inside out and I'd just, I'd look at it inside and shove my finger in it. I would kind of do the same. Oh, yeah. And, like, my grandma had one for, like, just turning pages. Yeah. And then also, like, uh, sewing? That would make no sense for sewing because. Well, it's just protect your finger.

That's a thumbnail. Thimble. Thimble. That's it. That's what they wear. The metal ones, the caps that would go over your finger. Oh. Yeah.

Thimble. Thumbail is not that. YouTube. Always work on the brain. Yeah. It's always, I'm thinking about work. Can you buy those rubber fingers? Can you look up?

Of course. Can you look up how much you think, do they sell them by like the hundred? Probably. Too much. Watchmakers have them too. They're like little ones though. They're like only coming up to here. Well, those that you like roll down.

They're like finger condoms. I've seen watchmakers with those. These were like, it was like a full hood. Yeah. Are the ones you were speaking of ribbed for your pleasure? Yes. Got it. Costco, we can door dash it right now for a pack of 12 for four bucks.

12 for four. It feels like that's expensive. This one says 12 for 6 bucks, so I feel like we're getting a deal. Whoa, dude. Costco, I mean, Costco pretty much has the best deal in the nation. Yeah. It's a first plug for Costco, I guess. There you go.

But back to Tom Brady. This is weird, right? I would do it. Would you like to know how much it cost? To what? To clone a dog? To clone your pup. Let's give a guess.

Is this with insurance? Insurance doesn't cover this. Yeah, I mean, I mean, I'm sure Tom Brady insurance covers it. Maybe, but there are different prices for dogs and horses. Cologne a horse. Oh, forget it. The next triple crown wear. Yeah, it's going to be like, this is a,

clone of fucking American Pharaoh. Yes. Secretariat. We can't name. Sea Biscuit. Name another horse. War horse. That was just a movie about a war horse. Which one did you say? American Pharaoh. And then I said Secretariat.

Right. No, I said... Oh, Jack's Revenge. That's a real horse? I don't know. It sounds like. Pio my. Sopranos. You like that one. Frankl. You're just looking them up now, you're cheater. You're absolutely cheating.

I would say, for a dog, since we're talking dogies here, buck 20, 120,000. I'm so below that. It's not even funny. What are you below it? I will say, 12 grand. That seems, see, that seems, if it's that hot, that low, that seems crazy because then more people are going to start doing it. I haven't heard anyone else do this.

I don't know if anyone has the answer to this. Do you know how much it costs to do IVF? Not cheap. I know that it's expensive. I just don't know how much. I don't know the exact price. And maybe it's similar to that. I don't know the exact price.

And I don't want to sit here and even try to guess because it would be... It can range from $15,000 to $30,000 for IVF. Oh, okay. Oh, you looked up IVF? I just did it quick. That's expensive. Yeah, yeah, crazy. But I imagine it's probably a similar price range.

And if it isn't, what are we doing? It's $50,000. $50. And to clone a horse, it's $85. Dude, those are huge animals. I don't love an animal enough to pay $50,000 to get them. You know that the people who own, like, racing horses are going to do this. Well, because they're multi, multi, multi-millionaires like fucking Tom Brady.

Yeah, bro, 50 Gs to clone a fucking dog. I'll be honest, even with pet insurance, like a dog surgery, like on a, A leg could be 12 Gs. Like, it can. So, like, once you rack up a couple surgeries, like, I'll just clone my dog and start from a pup, get a normal. I mean, again, you have to think from the perspective of Tom Brady. Tom Brady has fuck you money.

He has, he, he, he, I think, what was his Fox deal? Like $300 million? Yeah, it was like $350 or something. $350, okay. A fucking $50K is, a drop in the barrel. It's probably nothing when he's on the board. They're like, yeah, just do it. like let the paparazzi take photos.

When are we going to, listen, Tom Brady, I, and you know how I've been slighted by Tom Brady as a Jet fan, okay? When are we going to admit that outside of football, weird dude? Why? Weird dude. Why? Kissing his adult dad on the mouth. Didn't he do that?

Yeah, he's Super Bowl kissed him. Kiss of a winner. Dude, if my father even tried to kiss me on the mouth right now, which he probably would. He will. MSG. What if he just won the Super Bowl? I mean, we're doing MSG. That's the Super Bowl that we're getting to. That's true. That's true.

If my dad tried to after the show come up to me and kiss me on the mouth, I would say, I'm not kidding. I never want to see you or speak to you again in my entire way. Oh my God. I'm going to literally getting his dad's ear. Be like, yo, kiss Frank. It won't happen. You won't even know what's coming. I absolutely. Now I know if my dad comes up to me that he's going to try to kiss me. You won't remember.

It's my dad. He's going to kiss you. No. Don't kiss me, Daddy. Whoa That feels like an invitation If I've ever heard one Yeah You ever kiss your dad

On the lips? Yeah I don't think so Maybe as a child Yeah When my kids were real young They'd kiss me on the lips Yeah

But When did you stop? Like Ruby turned like three And stopped there She stopped or you? She Full transparency Like she's just like

I'll be like Can I have a kiss And I'll go like this And she'll just give me her head and I'll kiss her on the head. Oh, she got sick of the... Yeah, I think she... I was the problem there.

She's like, all right, yeah, yeah. I'm cutting you off. Yeah, I was, I was the problem. To have the wherewithal. You're gonna be kissing your kids until fucking puberty, probably. I know Joe.

Joe is gonna love his kids so damn hard. Because it's not like, like, you're not, it's just like a, like, uh, uh, yeah, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, You're going to kiss your kids.

And you're going to, too. I will. You're going to name your kids like Twisted tea. Oh, true. No. You're going to kiss your kids. And you will too. I will.

You're going to name your kids like Twisted tea, Jameson. You ever think about what you would name a child? Yeah. Like, is it Antonio? It's my dad's name. What's his name? Ferragamo. Neil.

Neil? And yellow, technically, yeah. Neal? Yeah. That's what it would be. Neal. You would name a kid, Neal. Isn't that your brother's name?

It is my brother's name. Oh my God, he's Neal's. Well, he's, he's junior, I think. Wait, what was the other? Wait, wait, wait, so your younger brother. Yeah. What's the end after your father? Yeah, we ran out of like, that's how it goes.

It's like, after the grandfather. And then yourself and then your dad. Oh, it was like a traditional... Yeah, that's how it goes. I'm going to go the route of... They liked your kid brother more than you. No, I was named after my dad's dad. Oh.

And then I would name my kid after my dad. It's like alternating. Like, my grandfather's name is Antonio. And what was the other name? And yellow is the actual name. Yellow? Like, yellow? Wait, hold on.

Yellow? Is that what you said? N yellow. Like A.N. The way you said... Wait, hold on. What am I hearing? What are you saying?

And yellow. and yellow yeah oh and yellow yes what the fuck is that angelo it's a great question

it's angelo brother it's not angelo but like the way that you said Neil Neil but yo and yellow

yeah I thought he was saying Neil and yellow and I'm like what Neil and yellow such like a like a classic name and then yellow

my God is yellow like an italian name or something Neil apparently was so fucking Neal this is not a name you're here I had an uncle Neil my dad's gonna see these TikToks and getting very upset

Is he really? No disrespect to your dad he's a cool guy, met him and he could probably whoop the shit out of me and according to you he's like a trillionaire I said that There is something funny about You have a beautiful child and you're like Neil

I mean Listen My name's Joe Like it's not like I'm not defending or arguing Well I'm just saying I wasn't expecting that Wait so you're gonna follow the like

The like naming my children You gotta do it It's very possible Okay what about like do you think your brothers And or sister if they have children They'll do the same thing It's very possible So like they'll just be like five kneels

And Antonio's running around you That's crazy What's what's what did you get the other name Which? Aniello. That's like the name. That is his name. That's the Italian.

We call him Neil. Like, oh. That is his name. Bro. You got that? Yeah, 100 million percent. Your dad's name isn't Neil. No.

It's Aniello. I just didn't think I didn't want to cause this whole yellow. But the Americanized version of it is Neal. I didn't want to cause the whole yellow thing. Which we caused. Oh. What about a girl? It's Aniella.

It's Anna. Aniella. And it's Neela. Neil? That's crazy, dude. I mean, I would definitely stick with the cool version. Which one's the cool version? I'd go with a different name.

Not Neil. Not going to the different name. Yeah. On yellow. That sounds like a fucking, like, Hispanic name almost, you know? So. We're close. I mean, Italian and Spanish is, you know, right there.

They're neighbors. On yellow. You know, they share a fence. Neil and Yellow. I was like, those are on different planets, those names. Oh, man. That is my pipes, TikTok. Like, the way you said Neil.

Yeah, I, yo, I just, I was not expecting Neil whatsoever. I don't know. Yellow. You were, that was such a who's on first moment for you. It really was. Absolutely. Like, you were so gone. End yellow?

Yeah. You were just on another planet. I also thought there were two separate names for the, the longest. That's fair. But I get you. I'm sure it's going to be a lovely child. Well, thank you. That's all.

I'm tapped out. Yeah. Yeah. All right. If you had another kid, do you have a backup name? You know, I've had enough names that I suggested that Becca was just like, let's try something else. Can you tell me a name that you thought of that Becca was like, are you out of your fucking mind?

Out of my, out of my fucking mind? Or just like, no, like an immediate no. Yeah. I honestly don't think there were any like that. Okay. There were some that we came up with and, like, talked about, and we're like, this is going to be it.

And then as the reality of having another child came in, we were just like, all right, we're not going to do that. Right, yeah. Like, this is not a joke. these are three names that were actually like in contention for both of my daughters yeah or before we knew the gender uh loki was seriously on the table i knew there was going to be one uh Thanos was seriously on the shut the fuck no you were going to name your child Thanos yeah what would you call him her Thanos

Thanos It was on It was considered It was in contention I feel bad for laughing And Eel Thanos is bananas And

Uh Valky I remember Valky For some reason Well it was because The summer of 2018 Um I had played the God of War game

And I then read a book On Norse mythology And I was captivated by it I loved it so much And Valkyrie I thought It was just such a cool name

Because you can go with Val You can go Kyrie You know So Valkyrie was You have a daughter named Valky And you call her Kyrie So Valky So Valky was seriously on the table

And then literally As we like found out That Becca was pregnant With both Ruby and Mave it was just like okay we're not doing Valky

how how Thanos is so is that are you serious I swear to God Frank Thanos is so funny

I swear how like what was the process so you think it just sounds cool so Loki

Thanos and Valky you were just watching Thor one day he was watching Endgame I mean Well, no, I explained where Valkyrie came from.

Loki, I think, just sounds cool. I like Loki. Loki sounds cool. And also, like, the god of mischief. Like, it could be like a little, he could be like a little prankster. Yeah, I like Loki. I think that's, like, a popular one. And then, uh, Thanos, I think just sounded sick.

That's a- It's just a giant. That's a tough one. I mean, fuck you, Neil. You can't compare those things. Neal! Yeah. Neil and Thanos

It's my son Vortex I mean There are people that do that I didn't I didn't I mean I think it's like Those people that do like This is my daughter Calisi

You know And it's just like a blonde hair Blue-eyed kid that was born in 2016 Yeah You know That's a prettier name Thanos And there's also Greek meaning behind Thanos

I think it's the Like Everyone is going to think of a giant No it's like A god of something it might be now that I think about it might be a god of death which is why we might have pivoted away also because it's the god of death too like oh what is your name mean it is the god of death right immortal and and the person phonification of death of death yeah yeah that word

beat me well that's a rough name yeah there was other like we looked to mythology for like I think um at one point we looked at like Venus Venus was on there Athena I think was on there at one point. I think I had suggested Scarlet. But then Becca was just like, we're not, there's only one Scarlet, and it's Scarlet Johansson, and we're not naming our daughter after Scarlet Johansson.

Scarlet fever. That is the fever. Were there any name suggestions that had nothing to do with Marvel? Well, they're named what they are. Ruby and Maeve had nothing to do with Marvel. There are others. I think those are great names, too. I think Avera was on there.

I love Ruby. What is Ruby? Ruby what? Ruby Willow. Oh. Fucking. Incredible. I mean, yeah.

And she's such a Ruby. Mave Robin. Robin. Oh, you snuck one in there. Well, well, no, that wasn't even done.

It wasn't even, he's like, oh, Mave Bruce Wayne. Mave, poison ivy. He's like, oh, it's Mave James Gunn.

No, that wasn't even done for that reason. And that was done because, like, we were going back and forth. Becca is very much so, like, I need to, like, we can have the names figured out. But, like, once I hold the child, the feeling of the name is going to be like, this is a Ruby. Right. Yeah.

So, she, uh, I think, I think, I think, um, at the time we were going back and forth on a couple from, well, Ruby, because, um, Well, Miles is Miles Robert after both of his grandparents. Both of his grandfathers were Robert. And then Ruby Willow was, Beck and I bonded over, like, we love willow trees, like, weeping Willows. And when she was pregnant, we went on, we went to, like, Lancaster, Pennsylvania, and we drove by, and we found, it was literally, like, out of a fucking Hallmark card. It was like a bench under a beautiful willow tree. We pulled over, we sat under it. And we were just like, Willow's a nice name.

We thought about it as her first name. And then Maeve was Maeve Robin, because at the time we were watching a lot of Robin Williams movies. And it just brought a lot of joy into our life. And then Miles one day had like, he was like learning to read and he had a book on birds. And it was like, oh, this is a swallow. This is a dove. And it was like, it got to Robin. and we're sitting in bed

and we have a picture of him holding up the book because we were like we couldn't believe it and he was like Robin that's a really nice name and that would go he said something like

that would go good as a first or middle name and we were like well that's the end of that yeah so then after that it was like it was either Robin as a first name or middle name

and we went with that nice it's cute it's cute names good names great names man I'm really glad you didn't go

with Thanos be honest yeah no I probably like my reaction would kind of be like no it isn't you know until Becca introduced them I wouldn't believe

I wouldn't either like I think he's fucking not even if I sent you a picture of like the birth certificate no that wouldn't do it this has been doctor yeah I wouldn't do it by a doctor Thanos

Thanos Ironman Alvarez yeah like I mean where do you even if you said that your kid's name is Thanos I would I wouldn't I don't know Becca has a list in her phone.

I wonder if she still has it. She had it definitely of, like, potential names. She was in on Thanos? I think, I think that was one where she was just like, I don't know. I don't know about it. Yeah. Well, let's just, like, think of others and then we'll come back. Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly.

Like, okay, we all have ideas here, you know. Let's open up to. All right, no idea is terrible. But, like, we tried to go with like V's and R sounds because they work really well with Alvarez, you know, like, yeah, yeah. You want it to be phonetically. Yeah, we liked it. So, like, Santa Gato, like, is going to be, like, T's and G's and S's, you know?

Yeah. You got to think of, like, the punchier letters in there. Prisco. P's would be good, like, Priscilla. That would be a nice name for a girl. Prislo Prisco. It's too close. Really?

Priscilla Prisco. P-R-I. That's tough. It's like Julia Gulia. Okay. What's that from? Excuse me. Oh, wedding singer.

I thought you would get that. wedding singer i pulled that out of no i know i'm right i know what you're referencing i'm just saying like excuse me like you're fucking shooting down priscilla take it easy on priscilla only when it's close to prisco prisco would be like prisk so p rs and c's would work best i'm confused with this sister Catherine Catherine prisco would be nice catherine neil a yellow a blue oh man well That's all I got You said that twice now

Yeah, I did We got more in you Let's squeeze some more out of you That's kind of crazy It's all you No I was gonna I'll watch you

What Jesus All right well Frank where can they find you Leave Frank Alvarez at all forms And social media Go check out the Patreon Patreon.com slash the base vineyard And yeah

We're happy Yep You can go follow me at Joe Sanagato And go follow the show At the base me yard And You can find me at Aunt Priscoe on

Instagram. Yeah, and that is all. We'll see you guys next time. Nice. He got it in. I'm always like the...