The Basement Yard - #540 - We Were Nominated

Episode Date: February 2, 2026

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CBC News. Welcome back to the basement. Welcome back to the basement yard. How's it going? Good. Right. You? Better.

What? Better? Did you answer for me? He said, great. Yeah, I guess I also said better than innocent. Then good, yeah. All right, too. Start again.

Take and go. How's it going, Frank? All right. And? Good. I don't even, what are we doing? What's happening? All right, let me start it.

We're done with the opening. Come on. What's that hat, by the way? This is a minor league team. They're the hops. Oh, that makes sense. Yeah, isn't that cool? It's kind of cool.

I like that. Oh, they're so pumped right now. They're getting free plugs. Yeah. How's your butcher going to feel about this? Because you love promoting that. You know what? Listen, I am.

Wasn't the butcher's shirt? Like, it was like a Bullwood's balls out? Yes, it was. Yes, it was. Yeah, there were. Big fat, ant-sized balls. No, not that big. Yeah, yeah, nothing is.

Nothing is. Nothing. I mean, now, I wear that pretty much exclusively to the gym. Is that better or worse? You're putting balls on your back in public? So worse. Is it on the front or the back? It's on the back.

So the front is the front of the bowl, and he's just like... Oh, the back is his asshole. And the back is his balls. Yeah. His ass and balls. Yeah, I'd say that's pretty bad. Really? It feels like an indoor...

It feels like an at-home shirt. I feel like that's worse because I have young kids. So where am I going to wear the shirt if not at the... If I have a shirt that has balls on it, I'm wearing it somewhere. we have a different opinion we have a different opinion have you ever had like a crew I'll do you one better

probably wouldn't wear it at home either yeah that's what I just said because I don't so I pretty much don't wear it ever just on the show well where else I mean if I'm going to express balls no

I you know I said express then I thought like what am I trying to express here if I'm going to get a shirt that has balls on it where else am I going to wear it but this comedy podcast where the people wash they also they also don't see Frankie from the back too often on here That is fair.

Why'd you say it so sexually? Yeah, that was... You don't see Frankie from the... Oh, this is a guy who's... You're still in a heated rivalry the way he said that. He's just like... Who you think's got a better ass?

Me or Frank? Come on now. Come on. Don't swing. It's probably Frankie. Okay. Look, I'm just... I'll let you be your person, make your decision.

It's probably Frankie. All right. Why are you saying probably? Be a man. It's Frankie. Thank you. Fuck! But why, though?

Yeah, tell us why. Tell me something negative about my ass. There's nothing negative about your ass. His ass just a little more volumptuous. Okay. Volumptuous. He's making up word. Yeah, volumptuous isn't a word, buddy.

But how would you describe my ass? Give me like two adjectives. It's there. Yeah. Yeah, get him. Get him. What the fuck! You heard that shit, right?

That was crazy. He just body shamed his boss. It's there. You know, where else would it be? It can't be over there. It's got to be here. What happened to the respect that kids used to have for their employers? What happened?

Back in your day, which I think you and I agree, that was the greatest generation. Which the second greatest. The greatest was World War II. Like, what are we talking about? Which part of World War II? The generation of good people. They call themselves a greatest generation. Yeah, they were self-programmed.

Yeah. Into saying they were the greatest generation. Yeah. What? cocky bitches. Yeah, it's kind of crazy. Just being like, well, that was the greatest generation. Was that after the Depression?

Yes, it was. I mean, it's easy when you do contrast like that. I mean, you can just look at pure numbers and see that like, I guess U.S. got involved in 41. If we start getting into this stuff, we're going to embarrass ourselves. I think that was when Pearl Harbor was bombed. So 41 and then 45 it was over. So, yeah, and then after that, boomers. That's the baby boomers.

That's what our parents' generation is because they came home from war And guess what they did? They fucked God after it like rabbits Like absolute jackrabbits I mean these Like Rosenoff and Hollander

Bang Bringing it back Well I'm trying to capitalize on this audience As much so I can Clearly You keep bringing it up It's interesting

And then you're asking an to rate your ass This is a weekly still This is a weekly Where do you think I measure up to? We're going to have to record That I was open a third time now This is a weekly Everyone take it easy

All right? We're not talking about it. Yeah. By the way, I don't know if we, I don't know why I'm bringing this up now, but yesterday I got the shit scared out of me because I was like in my living room and I live on a high floor, not a flex, but just reality for me. Definitely a flex, but also a flex. Giant, like movie style drone outside my window.

Scare the fuck out of me. I mean, that's illegal, brother. It wasn't like right outside my window. Like it was kind of like, but it was mad big. I thought it was an animal or I thought alien little ship. I felt like you. Like, you know, in Jersey, remember when you guys

had all the drones or whatever? Oh, I didn't see any personally. Oh, really? No, I didn't see any, which it's still, that was a year ago, and it feels like it was fucking decades ago.

It does. But, like, personally, I didn't see any, and you best believe that because I didn't see any, I said everyone was lying. Got it. You know,

and not with these eyes, didn't fucking happen. Did you not get in your car and drive around and try to see? So we did. Becca and I did. And she was just like, you know,

like, she, she subscribes a little more to like conspiracies and stuff like that. It's like a cloud. What is that? Yeah. Well, there was, no, there was one night where her and I drove around and she was just like,

there it is. Oh my God. You know, like it was like she was excited and they're like, oh no. They're seeing. Yeah, but. Yeah, the drone scared the fuck out of me. Dude, that, that is like legitimately creepy because windows, brother. Yeah.

I mean, it wasn't like, you don't have a terrorist, right? No. That'd be so cool up there. It would be. But so dangerous up there. Bro, it gets windy up there. I can hear the wind against my windows. I'm like, who the fuck is out on their terrace right now?

Bro, once you buy like a home on like, flat land? 300 acres, you're going to be like, yo, this is so much sicker than living fucking 95 stories in the air. I do like it. I mean, I'm not on the 95th floor. That's a little crazy. 93rd, whatever.

No. Not going to say the number. But, no, but it, like, scared me. Like, it was probably like a good 200 yards away. So it wasn't like at my window. Was it like interacting with you? Like were you like... No, it was like there.

I think I took a video of it. So you can see how far away it was. But... You saw it before you heard it. Like you saw it? I didn't hear it. You didn't hear it. Yeah.

So look, you see the size of this thing? Like, it was like a big one. Yo, how far away is that? I zoomed. It was like there. So it was like kind of in front of the next building over. But I was like, what's going on? Yo, that's scary because like...

It was there for a while. What if you were naked? I don't care. I mean, if they were like spying on me... I mean, who's to say they weren't? Those drones have pretty good camera and zooming capabilities. You know, maybe they were just like,

it's TMZ. They're after you. Why are you talking about Zoom? What, you're trying to disrespect me or something? I mean, I'm just saying, like, sometimes you need a little help in order to see something from a distance. Like a, like a binoculars? I mean, you know, like a telescope.

The Hubble telescope. Now we're getting even further away. I mean, I'm not saying the Hubble telescope. You shut up over there. You see how he spoke to him? First my ass, now my dick. You're fucking, you're beating both those to shreds today, Ann. Sorry. Yeah. I think like that, you know, it would need just to make the distinction.

If they can't zoom in on you, then you're just white guy number 48 that they're spying on. But then once they zoom in, you know, as close as they could get, and they go, that's Joe Hey buddy I do your face dude I've been I've been

double body shamed and we are nine minutes into an episode maybe eight minutes let me just be very clear about something shamed my body I am not shaming you in any capacity I did I did this like

looking at your face if you feel that me making that what a weasel you're weasling out shaming your body and maybe you have something to be ashamed of maybe you're projecting

the shame that you have for your body upon me. He's straight up shamed you. He's throwing you under the bus and he's weaseling. I don't want to be this guy but you did just point at him. Thank you. Whatever, run it up. How much dollars are we at?

He's at 40 bucks. That's not bad. That's $40 I didn't have before. That's how that works. That's exactly. Wait, so you didn't call because brother, I would have been on the phone with the cops. Who am I calling? Karen. What do you mean Karen? You would call the cops?

This kid's Karen. Karen. Oh yeah, yeah, you are. Karen? Yes, reporting a crime. How the fuck are we getting to a place? Oh, my food was soggy. You order food at fucking 30 miles away.

How are we getting to a place in society where reporting a crime? Put that fucking phone down. Excuse me, cop. There's a couple of kids outside. They're making a racket. That's you. No, that's a difference between, excuse me, police. Guess what?

There's a drone at my window and I'm fucking 100 million feet in the air. There's a different. different. Reporting that doesn't make me a Karen. You know what you're doing? You see what you're doing? Now you're, now you're, now you're ethically shaming me. He's body shaming you, so you're ethically shaming me because I have standards. You're creating terms. Put the phone out. Police. Someone is violating the airspace. This is not allowed. And I heard a firework back there. Maybe we should put some kids in jail. Bro, do you remember what happened in 2001? What are you referring to? We grew up in a time where it has been pushed upon us.

see something, say something. That communal camaraderie in New York City has potentially prevented numerous attacks from happening. We don't know, we don't see the numbers, but I respect that seeing something, saying something did something. They were probably filming a movie or something. So then you should get your paycheck.

I'm not in it. I mean, if they were filming me. Maybe they weren't. That's what I'm saying. How do you know they weren't? I guess I'll send them a cease and desist if I see the movie and I'm like, hey, that's my ding-dong.

Although I wasn't walking around my... So what, you're going to split the profits with, if it's a movie from a Disney because you're in the back, just fucking dick in the wind in your apartment? Is that how that works? You'll just send it... Like, you get to split the profits,

like now you and Disney make 50% of this movie. 50 is crazy, but I think that, like, if you're going to use my yang, then I should get something, for sure. How much is your yang worth? it really depends how close I got you know what I mean see now you're doing it

no I'm saying like if it's that visible and I'm in a movie like if they can make out the scar tissue on there the scar tissue what do you think has happened to my I don't know what happens I mean you clearly so ashamed of it I don't know if you take like a bamboo stick

and just fucking whack at it or something a bamboo stick how did how what did you grow up masturbating Bamboostick, a panda? I'm saying that you are clearly projecting the shame that you have for your indiscriminately sized wiener. I also was not walking around naked in my living room.

I don't do that. Do you guys walk around? Well, you don't walk around naked. You hate being naked? I do hate being naked, but I got a house. So I use, like, I explore the space naked sometimes, not a lot. Your bedroom. Yes.

Yeah. Do you walk around naked? I'm pretty, much always in my underwear. I can't really be naked because I got other people in the house that just barge in. You're always in your underwear? Pretty much. That's all of us. Oh, just underwear. Yeah. Do you walk around barefoot or do you leave your socks on? I leave my socks on for everything. For everything is so crazy. We have to throw that in there. We know what you're talking about now. You referenced it. Wait, you're sleeping your socks? Yeah. I sleep in my socks too. Don't worry about it.

What? We're together. We're together. Yeah. You guys sleep in your socks? Yes. Double sock sleeps? Yeah. Yo, what are we doing? You guys don't get overheated? No. Actually, if anything, I feel it regulates my temperature better because if they're off, I'm more likely to get cold than if they're on being more likely to get hot. Forget regulated. You guys should be medicated in a psych ward. I actually, I have heard that it is like conducive to sleeping better wearing socks because like I said, it regulates your temperature when you sleep. I also live with, oh my God, I love Vegas so much. Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, my God. She likes the room cold. Oh, so your feet get. I mean, it could be, I get a little, I mean, I'm a heat rock, but like, yes,

It could get a little... You'd rather be hot? I would rather be hot than cold. No. But you could always be more hot. Like you can't... Like you can't... You can't...

You know what I'm saying? Yeah. No, but then I can just put on clothes. But if you're too hot... But if you're too hot, you can't take off more... You can't take off skin. You can't take off more. Yeah.

I mean, if I'm too hot, then I just take off the clothing I'm wearing. Yeah, but what if it's continuously getting hot? Now what? Well, then there's a fire in the house because... We have a working air conditioning. I love sleeping in a cold room. If it was snowing, I'd prefer that. I mean, that's crazy. We know someone that is like that, like,

legitimately like Espos place. I remember his bedrooms. Yo, not even kidding. Don't even. 50 degrees. Espo's parents, the fact that their energy bill is not through the fucking roof. If you know about the energy bill, how are they alive? How are they surviving in that house? Well, there's got to be some science. With the AC on 13. There's got to be some science behind. A lot has come out about people doing cold plunges and stuff like that. Yeah, I mean, being in their house is a cold plunge.

The closest thing through a cold plunge that I've ever. Their cottage or whatever we're calling that. And I would come in from jumping in the lake and then I get inside and be like, I have literally instant hypothermia in this house. It gets cold. It gets cold. Maybe a colder, maybe colder conditions are better on the skin. I don't know.

Yeah, I think it keeps you skin tight. It keeps it tight and hydrated because, well, maybe it dries it out. I'm not sure, but I'm saying that there's possibly some, Someone can tell us. Do you have a face routine? Like, what's that called? The hell was that? Not a face routine.

Skin care? Skin care routine. I don't have a routine. I have been provided some products by some lovely companies that every now and then I'll be like, you know. Oh, but you don't do it every single night? No, no, no. Do you? Sometimes.

So same answer as me. Yeah. What do you got? From the PO box a few times, I've gotten like a bunch of skin care stuff, like face masks and like the under-eyed pasties thing. Oh, you get like the... You know? You put them on?

I'll be honest. I actually pretty much like never use the face stuff now that I think about it. It's more of the hand stuff. I'm more worried about my hands being dry. You are big on your hands. I am.

You lick them like a cat. We've gone over that. We don't have to. I know. But I just... I don't like use much of the face stuff. Really? I use a...

I use a... A moisturizer. There's some stuff that I have that I used to use a lot, but I stopped using it because I don't know you guys noticed back there. I mean, I did talk about it on the show, but my eye was fucked up for like a month because I got some cream in it and then I got it like a little thing and it took

forever to clear up and I needed steroids. But also my dog had something wrong with his eye also. He needed steroids. Twins. Why are you guys smiling? It's him, not me. What do? Why are you laughing? Because I said steroids? Yeah, that's why I'm laughing. I'm not laughing at all. I'm just, I'm listening. I appreciate you. You looked at him like wait till I say something. I'm a little sneaky little... No. No, I'm just... You expressed that you had something get in your eye

and it fucked it up and you needed medication. Oh, I see. I see. I see what's going on now. And you're laughing. Strike three for you, buddy. I'm telling your dad literally in person the next time I'm seeing him, which would be in a year, I think.

But I'm going to tell him. No, less. A couple months. Maybe. We don't know. I don't even know what he meant by that. That's another point, unfortunately. That's another point. Yo, the ice that you're on is literally...

I think this episode is just dedicated to rage-baiting Joey. We're just getting him at every. I can't even talk about using eye cream without you being like... Oh, yeah, you creep! No, I didn't. I looked over... Is it eye cream or a guy's cream? I know that's what you're saying. I did not say that.

You're insinuated. You're projecting your insecurities about your sexuality upon me. Stop using therapy speaking. I am affronted. Gather yourself. I have been sitting here trying to establish decorum and speak with a plumb on this episode. And you're sitting here doing all this. That's another one.

I'm going to come over there and snap the computer in half. I looked over an ant and I saw him going like this. That's what he did. That's what he did. Josh. That's something you do. No, it is not. That's another one.

Josh, show the clip. It's a lot of point. Let me find out that. That's another one. I'm a prisoner in my own studio. This place sucks. I hate this place. I looked over at him and my laughing was more of a sense of that's inappropriate,

be respectful than it was like, yeah, he maybe did get a load in his eye. Shut up. And you shut up. And I'm pointing at both you. Mark it down. I don't care. What else do we have to talk about? I don't know if this will upset you or not,

but one of the Sanagado Studios videos, we lost some monetization. Well, actually, we're giving it to somebody else right now. Oh. What does that even begin to mean? Also, why are we talking about this on the podcast? Oh, I was going to explain that the reason is because you guys sung Backstreet Boys so well that it was flagged.

Wait, when did we sing Backstreet Boys? In the misheard music video when you were singing in Simish, Oh, when we were like, What is that word? Yeah. It's the language from the Sims. Oh, bro, I thought that was like a... You ever played The Sims?

Like you were singing in Simish. I thought that was like a word. Bro, I used to play The Sims. I've loved games. I've never played the Sims, but you can like build a house and people die. And then like, yeah, you like, don't put a door in a room and then they sit there. They cry, they die. I've seen people like put their dogs in a fire.

I'm like, what is this game? Yeah, I mean, that's the bad parts of life that you don't want to interact with. Don't love that. Wait, what? So wait, we're giving money to the Backstree Boys? So the Backstreet Boys flagged you for singing their song in Simmish. Shut the fuck up. I swear to, I swear to.

Wait, we sing it in a made-up language, and then we got flagged, and then we have to give them the money? First of all. What's going on? One, speaks to how good we are doing things. Singing that song? Not just singing. Did you put like a music in the background? I did not.

It was all you. They flagged it. I, I mean, this might be the pipeline that we get to the Backstreet Boys. I'll tell you what. If we do get to the Backstreet Boys, I'm showing up with a big document. and an invoice being like, getting me it back. They're at residency at Vegas at the sphere.

They can afford. They can afford to give us. So, but we would have to go in and inflate the numbers on the video and just be like, yo, this video was supposed to have made,

supposed to have made like $20 million. $150 million. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So just give us, you know what, just give us a third. That's what you asked for. Give us 100K.

Let them believe that they're getting a deal. Yeah, yeah. You know, that's how you do it. You're still reading the art of the deal, right? I don't even know what that is. You would just tell me it's your favorite book. I don't know what that is.

Oh, well... I'm reading a book about mushrooms. Actually, I've switched. I put the mushroom book down, and now I'm reading a book about, you guessed it, childhood trauma. So in the episode where you... So in the episode where you project your discomfort with your tiny penis,

you tell us that you're reading a book on childhood trauma and then you had previously been reading a book about a mushroom. Let's unpack that. Thinner ice than him. Actually, that's not true at all. What am I said? Don't even say yes. Wait, hold on.

So the Backstreet Boys are getting some of our money. Yes. So in addition to not only supporting them by literally being drug mules for their fucking music, now they want to take us, they want to bend Joey over. Wait, wait, are you, what are you saying? We sing their music all the time. No, no, no. What is the drug mules thing?

I don't know. Or like we're mules for them, basically. Oh, oh. You know. So now what they're doing is they're bending Joey over and taking his car, cold hard earned cash from him. First. The scorebed app here with trusted stats and real-time sports news.

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please go to Connixonterio.ca. First of all, we'll take free tickets to a show. Dad, I'm on board for. If we get to come to the sphere and sit in any seat we want... But not even just that. Like, if you're gonna...

If we basically... We want to sing the song. Basically. Power talk. Thank you. Get us up. And they're just like, yo. J.C.

Nope. Nope. Wrong band. Fuck, fuck, I got it. I got it. I got it. Kevin.

Yeah. AJ. Yeah. Brian. Yeah. Howie. What? Nick.

Yeah. Like, you saw what we can do. Right. And we did it so well that we're paying you. We're basically, literally. You've put people on stage for free. I assume. Yeah.

You pull a fan up and be like, hey, sing the song, Rusty. Yeah. Exactly. And he sucks. Yeah. Yeah. And then like, you're like, all right, sit down. Yeah.

Yeah. All right. okay, you know. But like, we have literally paid into this opportunity. Yeah. Let us get our money's work. Yeah. You know, just go up there. And you guys could do your whole thing. Like, I've seen there's like videos. Are you guys going through like the Matrix and shit like that? That's all, you're a boy band. I'm going to need to be harnessed to the floor if we're going to do that. Also, watch this. We'll work on it. We'll work on it for sure. Yeah. We'll work on it. That's a different band. That's no, it isn't. That's also, no.

No, that's Marionette. That's in sync. Yeah, that was that was in sync. No, but like, go look at the, the, uh, everybody, backstreet's back. Go look at the music video. I guess everyone was doing that. Pull up the fucking music video. Don't show it on here because they already take it enough of our money.

We can't. We can't have them. I'm afraid of saying to be word now. But if you see, I believe it's AJ. He goes in the video and he's just like, oh my God, we're back again. Like, oh, because he's the mummy. Because he's the mummy, dude. It was a great Halloween music video.

Oh, no. I think he was. the Phantom of the Opera. Oh, that might be true. That might be it. Regardless, if you're going to take the money, we want to sing the song on stage. Not the whole song. Just want to get a couple notes in.

Also, like, I think we are both coordinated. I think that we both have, I'm starting to get nervous, though, combined fair amounts of cardiovascular health. Frank. We could learn choreography. And I'm not talking for like a whole song. I'm not even talking for half a song. Give us this.

Give us this. That's all we need. That last clap. Holy shit, that ring my ears. I heard it bounce against the back wall. We don't need much. We're simple. We're Backstreet Boy fans.

Yeah. You know. We're boys. We're not Backstreet. If anything, we're more from the back street than you. We're basement. Backstreet boys. The basement boys.

I'm sure that everyone in your crowd would be confused and that's okay. Because our fans would like it. No press is bad press. No press. Who are these idiots? No press is bad press, especially in today's world. Let's be honest, okay? So what they could do is they could just be like

the Backsheet boys bought up who? Yeah. And then TMZ gets it along with your pictures from the drone and they run away with it. I will say it is obvious that we would be getting more out of this than you guys, but I think you need to be okay with that. Also, they already stole our money. They've taken our money.

Yeah. If anything. Also, Backstreet Boys, you should be in a part of your life where you're being generous with your time. They're doing a bunch of shows. Like, you should be spotlighting young creators. Oh, you know what? I just thought about this.

Maybe it's not them and it's the label. The evil label. But here's the thing. That is. what's happening. And they're going to see this. But that's not fun to think about. Oh my God. Like, I didn't even know what I was happening. I don't think he talks like that anymore.

I think he does. I think he does. Can we cross-reference my Nick Carter impression? Who's your favorite backstreet boy? I mean, I was pretty cool with AJ. Dude is sick. Had a couple earrings. I thought it was cool. I was a Brian guy. Brian, you kind of looked like Brian, I remember. I think that's why I liked him. I was like, oh, what guy?

I didn't dislike any of them, Howie. But like, I just I just What? I just think that I'm kidding I love everyone All of the boys from the back street Have my approval

Right They're I mean They're legends Legitimately Legitimately legend Like not a joke They are legitimately legend I will say

We're like joking around here But if this did spiral out of control I'd be mad nervous Brother Also I'm not doing this just so if you guys are watching this and you're even considering this they're sitting around watching together you know how the boys like they do they're the backstreet boys they're also sitting on bleachers in like a studio for some reason you know what I mean yeah yeah oh my god this is so fun and then Nick's got his

foot up against a like a basketball yes um if you think Kevin's in the back and you think he's just sitting down but he's really tall he's really tall yeah if you guys are watching this and you do want to bring us on stage and be like oh it'd be really funny moment you guys you know could sing the song I'm not doing it with a handheld mic I need this You need this And I need that And I need sunglasses

That don't That are one glass One glass You need the This mic Yeah you know We need puffer vests And baggy pants

Baggy pants Baggy pants I'm talking I'm even going like What kind of shoe wear are we wearing We need some like Mid-90s Lugs

That's what I'm talking about Because Timberlands people have stolen Timberland culture from New York don't get me started on that Lugs Give respect to something with a fucking buckle Something that if I use during kickball It would be a cheat code

Yeah You know what I'm saying They wouldn't allow it in a league In a professional league It doesn't just be big sneakers Yeah And like Very very minimal

You can just give us a high five You know What? What? The way you gave you of a high five. Yeah. I'll also just go to a show too, though.

But I'd like to be in it. I'd like to sing a note. I would like, or you know what, bare minimum, acknowledge us. Bro, first of all, obviously this is hilarious, but we're going to shoot a shot on a podcast now. Our lives have gotten kind of out of control

and this feels a little bit possible, so I'm going to say it. Listen, you know. Frank, hold on. Just for one second. Just think. Can you imagine that that happened? if they were like come on stage with us and we sang a song with the Backstreet Boys First of all that's not happening Second of all if it did happen though

That's better than MSG I'm glad you said it I'm glad you said it That's way better I mean I was on stage with the fucking backstreet boys I mean we were on The fuck are you gonna tell me

I'm real a pack Real a pack you were on stage with Frank Alvarez At Madison Square Garden That's pretty fucking great too Yeah I almost said it I almost let the B word go Oh oh you You were going to call me a bay.

Oh, boy, was I? Yeah. That would be up there. That'd be crazy. That'd be up there. And like, again... My sister would kill me. Oh, my God.

My sister would bring her fucking dolphin starter jacket out of retirement that she bought just because she wanted to impress Nick Carter at TRL. And she would punch me in the mouth. That's a real story. My sister became a Dolphins fan because she heard that fucking Nick Carter was a Dolphins fan. So my parents bought her a Miami Dolphins starter jacket in the 90... It's probably fire. Yeah.

You ever seen a starter jacket and said, Ew, that's ugly? Yeah, they're all sick. They're the best. Yeah. Every single design. Let's shoot another shot. Hey, starter.

You know me. I'm fucking there, baby. I'm ready to go. We squeeze out of this show. I mean, listen, also, yeah, we've made our pitch to the backstreet boys. Yeah. If they don't do it in sync, this is the perfect time to swoop in and get some good press. Not on the same episode.

I mean, listen, listen, listen, listen, listen. We can reignite the boy Ben wore. we can bring back the triple B, baby. 2026, the re-emerging of triple B. Boy band beef. All right. Everyone talked about Drake versus Kendrick, Drake versus Kendrick, Drake versus Kendrick.

Let's bring back and spark the fire and flames of Insync versus Backststst Street Boys. And they are fighting over us. Take it easy, boys. We've officially gotten ahead of ourselves. We have. Yeah. I just think that there is,

Because like what if in sync Our fans are so supportive Thank you guys so much And what if they rally behind us And they start tagging the Backstreet Boys Which Maya What if like everyone cut a clip?

Everyone cut a clip of us Just like what if someone What if we What if someone use their hard skills And valued time To find all the clips of us Singing about the Backstreet Boys And they make a fucking clip

That goes mega viral. What if people worked really hard to help us, too, who are already spoiled, get more out of this? What if that happened? I mean, if their life is not to help us, then what's going? Why be a fan? Be a better fan. Do what we want you to do. Not what you want to do.

I feel like one of those, like, preachers now, lock the door. I need to collect $100,000. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Those fucking mega church pastors that are just like, I need a, new g6 in order to spread the word of god speaking of we do have some sponsors for today the first one being how you doing i'll keep going after uh how you doing square space okay is it square space yes it is it is square space square space uh is a platform where it's going to help you create and run your website so if you make content or you have a online business or you sell things you're

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And it's about the state of our nation. And our nation is Patreon. Patreon.com slash the basement yard. What's the state of it? It's going great. It's incredible. There's stuff on there that maybe you want to take a look at. Maybe you want to gander. Okay? Maybe Patreon is inviting you to come take a look under the blanket, so to say.

Well, you're not going to get the chance if you don't go to patreon.com slash the basement yard. That's the blanket. I'm showing you the weight of the blanket. And all you need to do, lift it up, take a look. Patreon.com slash the basement yard. You've got these weekupsteads. You've got these weekup episodes a weekend, man.

Whatever. What the fuck is happening? I can hear even Ann over there going, what does he do? Second tier? Weekly episodes. every single Friday. Right? Yeah.

Also, Hey, Joe, I've got a question for you. If I join Patreon today, do I only get to see the episode that come out after my joining? No, you get access to all of them. All of them? All of them.

Wow. It's a good question. I've gotten that before. It's a good question. Thanks for your approval. This guy. This guy over here. I'm telling your dad.

Oh, my God. I can't wait. Well, listen, go to Patreon. com slash the basement. Jokes aside, we love the fact that you have joined us on this ride, and we want you to keep joining us. or if it's your first time watching or listening or you're thinking about maybe you need a, you know, a little, a little nudge in the right direction to check out what's under the blanket.

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We'll talk with you later. Last pitch I'm going to say about this. That's not a saying at all. Last thing I'm going to say about this. About the backstreet boys? We have made our plea and made our case of the backstreet boys. The balls are in their court. It's not just one ball now.

There's five of them. So you need multiple balls for them. If they chose not to do it, it's okay. Also, other boy bands, I think I can speak for both of us. We're not opposed. In sync? I mean, listen, sounds like Justin Timberlake could use some good press.

Maybe we can help. Don't ruin this. I'm not ruining anything. I'm just saying. But you're already bringing up other options. We have one goal. We have one goal. But that doesn't mean that we can't be bought.

Yeah. We're paying. I know. We can't be purchased ing. I'm just, I've said what I had to say. Yeah. And I think, you know, I think I could speak for, anyone would be lucky to have us. I could. I don't know. I don't know. I mean, I might throw up on that stage, to be honest.

It looks like it would get me dizzy. I mean, if I looked back and I saw like, you know, like, do, do, do, joo, she's like, oh, my God, we're flying through a black hole. I'm going to throw up on the stage. Yeah. That would be, that would be tough, especially like. everybody. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Some of those rooms, like, I remember when we were, like, first time on stage, first time, actually, boys, you hear that,

first time we were on stage at Radio City, I remember standing on that stage and just seeing the curvature of the room and just be like, whoa, this is, I'm feeling a little dizzy. Really? Yeah, a little bit. You know, it could have been also in addition to the weight of the moment for our first time of two nights on stage it sold out Radio City. And it was intense.

So, like, I can imagine getting on there. and should be like, this is also intense. Yeah, that would be a crazy one. I don't know. But they've done like stadiums. So like, balls are in your court. If you're getting one song to do with them, and they're saying, you can hop on one song,

here's our set list. Which one is like that one right there. That one. I think, everybody. I do want to do the dance. Or I at least want to do the part where they just go, Everybody, yeah. You know?

What? There's a part of the song where it's like, Everybody. Oh, I didn't like, everybody, everybody. Yeah, I want to, or that part. You throw your hands up in the air. Wave around and like it just donkey. That was pretty good.

Be careful how good it gets. Oh, yeah. Now we're going to owe them. They take money from us in two videos. I'll tell you what. Now we have to upload this early and make sure it doesn't get. We have to make sure that this doesn't get. That much?

That much? I don't know anymore. The rules are so crazy with YouTube. Dude, call up the CEO of YouTube. Just be like, Ong, don't know. Yeah. What are you doing here?

What should I say? I'm going to the office. No, well, yeah, I guess I said you'd call him. So, like, oh, him. Oh, yeah. You know what? Oops. Him or her.

Women can't be CEOs? No, they can be and should be. I believe that the CEO of YouTube is woman. If I'm not mistaken. cancel him of all the things you're going to look up now to make me look like an asshole I'm pretty sure

I'm pretty sure she's a I am a victim of a patriarchal society I'm a victim here that's a good narrative that's a good way to spin it you like that I've done something wrong but it's because the world made me this way

it's because the world made me into the monster that I am okay oh it's a it's a man now so she was fired for a man even worse she stepped down stepping down is great Her own accord, we love that autonomy and that choice. That's how you girl boss.

Even if you're stepping down from being the boss, still girl boss? She still, well, CEO of YouTube is now Neil. Neil? On Yale? You're back to this. Your dad is the CEO of YouTube? Neil what? Neil Mohan.

Neil Mohan? I think I got it. Spell it. M-O-H-A-N. That was how I thought it was going to be spells. Yeah, I mean, from Susan. Susan stepped down. Susan.

there's better names yeah well such a bad idea this is this is going to this is if anything now YouTube has like a double reason this fucking hit us you know we buried it we're 40 minutes into an episode

they'll never see this Neil's gonna be like Neil searches Neil Neil searches his name in all the videos that have been uploaded and he just scrubs through him and he's gonna see your pretty grin and be like I'm not gonna do anything

and he's gonna see my fucking ugly mug and he's going to be like, no, I got to do something. What is this? You always do this thing where you're like this big ogre who's disgusting. It's ridiculous. You act like you're just like, oh me, I'm just so, I'm like I got pimples and I'm like disgusting

and I stink. Like that's how you you talk. It's ridiculous. It's ridiculous. First of all, you're a good looking guy. First of all, let's start here. Who is to say that your beauty standards are pimply

is bad, get him, people that suffer from acne. Two, there is only one instance in popular media where we can point to an ogre, and that's Shrek, and Shrek is a corner of the internet fucking daddy. What point are you making? I'm saying that you always talk about your appearance negatively. No, I think I'm a relatively good-looking person. Except if we talk about your ass, then you go crazy. See, what a loaded episode we got.

Your ass makes him make up words. Don't put you a voice Like, do you sky What, what, what, what were, like, what is going on in this episode? What? First, you're clearly feeling away about how you look in the mirror.

First, what? We started there. No, what we started with was a double body shame. It was a singular body shame. No, it was a double. It was not even a, I mean, you guys, I mean, you guys dog piled me. You talked about my butt.

You guys dog piled me. You talked about my butt. And then you talked about something else that I can't remember at the moment, but I will, watch the tape. I think it was your tiny his words. Well that's what you brought up. His words. There was a lot of insinuating.

Then you brought up the eye cream, if you will. I laughed at aunt because I looked over at aunt and he went like this. That's what he did. And let's be careful because Neil's watching and we don't know what's going to happen and the backstreet boys. Yeah. I mean this could be one of the most

like celebrity viewed episodes because the backstreet boys. There's five of them. You think of the staying power of each of the individual boys of the back street. Then you add Neil in there. Neil's got...

Neil. The biggest media platform on the planet, basically. Yeah. Which I think is doing a great job. We're cool. We're cool, dude. We're cool, Neil.

We're so cool. You're good. You're really cool. Put your fingers down. Yeah, be careful. Sorry. I don't know. I'm just saying that, like...

Yeah. I don't think I'm ugly, but like... If you had a rank, yourself one to ten. Oh, we've done this a bunch. Yeah, but that was like years ago. I don't remember. So we're revisiting our personal.

Do you think you're higher or lower? Like, have you, do you think you've peaked? I think I am the best version of myself that I've ever been. Physically. Overall. I'm talking about appearance. Oh, just appearance?

What are we doing here? Well, I mean, there was an overall ranking. There's a bunch of that stuff. We're talking about how you have this thing you say you act like you're disgusting. I know I don't do that. It's a jokes and fun. One to ten.

On just looks. I would say I'm at like, see, this is tough because any answer I give, people are just going to be like, no, you're better, or there's going to be those dickheads

that are just be like, honestly, Frankie, I think that you're pretty cool, but like, you got to know you're ugly. So there's no fucking answer that I give if you're going to satisfy anyone.

So you know what? There is no winning. There is no winning. There is no winning. There's no winning. So I'm going to leave it for ambiguity. I'm going to let the world decide. And by the world, I mean, Becca,

because that's the only fucking opinion I need on that. And God and Santa Claus. That's right. God and Santa Claus. They're always watching. Yeah, that is correct. But, yeah, I mean, I know I'm not. Why do you got to make me break out a joke like this?

Why are you going to make me do that? I'm joking back. You're joking back? Yeah. Joking back? Yeah. I think you're both tens. That doesn't save you, buddy.

Yeah. You think I forgot about the last 45 minutes. Nice try. You're, you're, you're, I'm telling your dad. No. What would you do? Serious question. Yeah.

What would you? Oh, wow. You're enjoying that. What would you do if his dad actually saw that? And then he came into work when we were recording. He's like, yeah, guys, like you need to like seriously step back on those jokes. We're like, why? and he's like, my dad bent me over his knee and spanked.

First of all, that would be an insane thing to come in and say, too, if you think that's not resulting in a doubling and tripling down on the jokes, you are sadly mistaken. You look it to be like I said it. Yo, could you, like, if he was like, yo, you got to chill, I'd be like, literally not gonna. I just like, the picture of like, because I've met your father. Have you ever been spanked by your dad? Crazy out of context thing to say?

No. But, like, you know, like, across his knee and being like, ah. I think once and... I think once and, like, it was like a pivotal thing for my dad where he was just like, for that moment on, I never want my kids be afraid of me. So he like didn't hit us again, but he gave us the look, like... Really wish our parents hung out more because my dad, I think, got addicted to it. Wait, you got bent over like your fucking Pepe Lepew in a part-team?

No, I never got bent over. That never happened. Last couple of episodes. It was more of like a standing. It was, oh, so like you took it standing. Crail. Come on. I mean, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to do that.

But like, you know what I mean. Was it? Was it a bear butt? No, it wasn't my butt. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. Did you get across the knee?

I mean, your dad's Italian, dude. You probably like, you probably would have a wooden spoon. Anytime you had a wife be it around, you're like, you'll stay out of his way. You've seen Godfather. Jesus Christ. But like, he never, do you never? Not really. I don't think so.

Maybe when I was really little. I mean, you're the oldest of your siblings, too. So if anyone's getting their shit beat, it's you. That's a wild sense too. Come on, the double entendres don't count. Neil, take it easy on us, because we're just joking around. Well, both, both Niels. Yeah, yeah, yeah, all Niels involved.

I was talking about the big Neil. That's the other Neal. And then you're Papa Neal. That's what we'll call them. Yellow and Neil. Yes, that's right. Got it. Got it.

Yeah, I can't. I don't know if. I've ever known someone, or at least they haven't told me like that, like, just got like the legit, like, knee out, they like slumped over it and then just got like a... Yeah, that's like a real 50s thing. That's a real 50s way of abusing children. Yeah. You know, that's not really modern.

Yeah, now it's done through, like, tax messages. Yeah, now... Yeah, exactly. Now you, like, psychologically catfish your daughter and you just pretend to be other people and bully her until she's psychotic. Listen, if you plan on being a parent, there's two ways of rearing your children. The old-fashioned way, with a wooden spoon, with spanking on the butt. Or you can text them that they're a fugly slore.

Yeah, you can cerebrally assassinate them. And guess what? You also have the luxury of if you get caught, the world made you into this monster. Exactly. It's your trauma that made you do this. Just because you blatantly get caught doesn't mean that you can't change the narrative and be a victim too. Bingo. You know what I mean? If you get in trouble

for something that you actively do, you're not in trouble for it because you're doing it because something actively happened to you. Correct? I don't know. I mean, you know, I think like... What a crazy document. What a fucking... Did we talk about that?

Yeah, we talked about it ad nauseum. Yeah. That's a good word. I like that. It reminds me of museum. What does ad nauseum mean? Like, does that mean until we're nauseous? That's what it feels like. Like we talk about it until we want to throw up.

Like, oh, until like, but it's got to be, it's got to be Latin, right? Also, is it at, nauseam? Ad, AD. Oh. Yeah. And nauseam is like. Like mausoleum.

Good word also. Yeah. What is it? What is it? Is it one word or two words? It's ad nauseum. Ad. Used to say that something happens

or is done so many times for such a long time that it makes people annoyed disgusted. So similar. Basically what I said. Is it one word or two words? It's two words. Where does the word?

Nauseous, I know, nauseous has to do with like the feeling of being sick, but I guess like if we trace it back to the early roots of what nauseous means, it's the same thing. No, you had it. It's a Latin phrase. It means two sickness. So until sickness. Yo, I'm a fucking genius. Frank, the word is ad nauseum.

I mean, but to be able to make the distinction that it's Latin, I think, is very impressive. Well, I'm just really excited to be. sitting next a Rosetta Stone. Thank God you're here to figure that one out. Literally my guess too. I didn't get any credit. Well, you don't deserve credit. Speaking of credit, though, you know who does deserve credit and is finally maybe getting some? No. Us. Oh! I had no idea where you were going with that. Yeah. I mean, the segue wasn't perfect, but, you know, that was actually a good one. You've had way worse in the past. How so? You have to hard pivot sometimes. I mean, yeah, sometimes you have to hard pivot.

pivot. No, but I don't know. It was announced, and I think we can talk about it now, but we have been... We're just going to do it, right? At this point. Yeah, who cares? Neil, turn this off. Neil, wait. Wait, can we get in trouble? Turn it on. I don't know. Well, yeah, why would you tell Neil the two? It's nothing to do with Neil. Yeah, why would you do that? Neal, he doesn't want you in the room. I do, because I think everyone deserves a seat at the table to have a conversation about what they feel here. There you go, Neil. No, we got nominated for I-heart. I Heart Radio Podcast Awards. Yeah, we got...

Yay! We want a lap track. I mean, not the lap track. A clap track. Aplaus track? Joey wants the clap, so give them it. Cut that out, Neil. Yeah, we got nominated for awards.

We got Best Comedy. Best Comedy podcast. And best overall ensemble, I believe it is? Which is wild. I didn't think that we were an ensemble. Pull them up. Pull them up, baby. Well, that's what it is.

Pull them up. What are you going to look at? What do you want to make sure that. I want to see who else we're nominated with. It's best overall ensemble, which we're an ensemble? That feels like we're doing a dance. Well, you know what I'm saying? I mean, no, an ensemble is just a group.

I know, but ensemble to me sounds like... Ensemble feels like more than two. Yeah. So like... Huh. I know. I know. I absolutely know.

I don't. Don't. Don't. Just more than two, you'd say. Yeah. Too many. now we're an ensemble because of this nomination now like I'm flabwe're we're very honored to be like legitimately incredible legitimately like all jokes aside we were just talking we started this episode

we started this episode talking about joey's tiny weiner and now we're nominated for awards yeah this is crazy yeah um I will say the fact that we because I just learned today I knew that we were nominated for best comedy podcast for a while now not for a while for like a week and a half or whatever and that that was cool I just learned today that we were also nominated for best overall ensemble and that is although very happy for that also not the best because I got to deal with this

now. Yeah so I didn't say anything. Hands over there going like you know ensemble isn't duo I mean you know I think that all the other the addition could have also

like taken us from being nominated elsewhere so he's viewing it as in the positive like maybe you have just fucked us So we better win, really, what that means. Yeah. Well, I was looking at the other people in the category, and it's all like trios.

The ensemble? Yeah, I'm just saying. Oh, wow. Sky. Sky. You know what you need to do, right? The people love him, man. You know, I mean, good.

He deserves it. Oh, my God. When it's like contract negotiation time, ah, this is going to come up. Can I be in? Only if we win. Can I be it on the talks? If we lose, then it's easy.

I get to blame you. Yeah. Yeah. If we win, you're going to... I mean, this is a classic scenario of just like, if the cake is good, I made it. If it's bad, your mother made it. It's the same situation.

So, I mean, listen, jokes aside, an incredible honor because the names in there are people that are, like, been in the industry. Massive shows, massive people, comedians, actors, actresses. So just even being in the conversation, it's cool. But then seeing that, like, you're nominated in the font that Batman Forever was typed in is really fucking cool too.

Why did they use that font? I don't know. That is so funny. It is a Batman Forever font though. Yeah. I mean, I'm just excited that we get to sit and go to an award show and just sit there. I just be like, yeah. I mean, I'm cool with losing, to be honest.

Yeah, I mean, it's going to be fun. If we're being honest, we are... Boating for flight 246 to Toronto is delayed 50 minutes. Ugh, what? Sounds like Ojo time. Play Ojo. Great idea. Feel the fun with all the latest slots in live casino games and with no wagering requirements.

What you win is yours to keep groovy. Hey, I won! Feel the fun! The morning will begin when passenger Fisher is done celebrating. 19 plus Ontario only. Please play responsibly. Concerned by your gambling or that if someone close to you, call 1-866-3-3-1-2-60 or visit Comox Ontario.ca. Nominated in Best Comedy category with some juggernauts. Yeah.

Amy Polar is one of them? Yeah. So, shit. No, it's the honor of losing to the great Amy Polar. And then, and the other one, again, Juggernauts, one of the people that are nominated, one of the shows in there is Smartless. Both nominated for Golden Globes this year.

Yeah. One was a winner. And did anyone else in that category get nominated for Golden Globe? Did we get nominated for Golden Globe? No. No, we did not. No. No.

Baby steps. I mean, listen. A nomination. I just being completely honest to you. and not joking anymore. I don't know if that's true. But not something that I thought was actually possible. Because when you go and you look at the names

who are nominated in our field, they're kind of like either have a really good relationship with certain companies or whatever. They're very famous people. Like, obviously we are not that. We're very independent and kind of do our own thing here in New York. So the fact that we're even nominated on this and the winners are decided by like their own

judges or whatever. So like the fact that we're even nominated by people like that is like fucking awesome. Yeah. You know, we're kind of doing something right. I mean, we're also hot off the presses of being the sexiest podcast on the planet.

Which is also a crazy thing. Like, like, you know, if we're, you know, what's happening? If we're letting you peek under the blanket,

we are legitimately in a place where we're just like, the things that have happened to us are crazy. They're just funny now. And now it's getting to a point. where it's just like that would be funny and then it's like it happened it's like like it's weird but also we need to approach it that way because if we don't certain people here that i can't point fingers too right are going to be like yeah you know yeah but we remain humble the byproduct there is pretty unfortunate but what what in our humbliety

is what is preventing us from winning two words that we've made up today Is that a word? No. Humbleiety. Our humbleness, humbleness, humility? Humility? That's it. That's the one.

Yeah. What if that's what's preventing us from winning in this stuff? Like maybe we didn't get nominated for a Golden Globe because we were too humble. I don't know what we could have done diff. I mean, what if we just made spitball in here? What if we just made shirts and just put our names on all the shirts? And, oh, you know what? even faces.

I've tried that. I've made that, I've done that before. Yeah, I mean, it's something, it's a thought. Yeah.

No, but that's, it's crazy. I mean, a lot of this stuff is just fucking funny now. And even like, we were joking before

about the Backstree boy thing, like, if something like that ends up happening, like, one, that's just like not, that's a dangerous thing to happen for us.

To know that we could speak something stupid like that into existence, get ready. Yes. I mean, do you remember there was a whole run of episodes we did where we were like saying that there was a bidding order out for the basement yard? We didn't do anything. You were like, oh, Taylor Swift, buy our podcast, whatever that means. I didn't say that. I said fund it. But also, I think that, you know, you know how I am.

I keep an ear to the ground with things in the entertainment industry. movies, TV, you know, comic books, stuff like that. The way that that industry works is when something gets hot enough, everyone wants it. What if we need to be hotter? Hotter. We got to get hotter. But like in the sense of like, you know, Backstreet Boys, backstreet boys, you could become like, you could have equity in this if you really want.

Ooh, don't use that word. Tough word. We're not giving out of equity. I mean, you know, you think about it. Like, they could. They could what? But they just need to give us what we want. And maybe they'll get equity.

What are you doing? I'm trying to do everything I can. We're campaigning is what we're doing now. I mean, you've got a campaign. You've got to start somewhere. I know. But what's the award again? I heart.

I heart podcast award or something like that. It's South by Southwest. Yeah, so the show is in South by Southwest. In Austin. In Austin. I think it's safe to say, we could say we'll be attending. Yeah. and I fully plan on making...

I got to have a cool outfit. I was thinking about that. Should I wear a camel? Beck and I, first of all, I already have two. Second of all, I was thinking... Because Beck and I were like, what are we going to wear? And I was like, oh, shit, yeah, that's right. Like, do we do tucks?

Or is that like... You got to kind of... It's the podcast awards. You need to take it a little joky. Like, it's like a... I believe what they said was cocktail attire. I mean, you are so far this year. You're 0 for one for cocktail attire because you dress as the weight stuff.

Honestly, you want to know something funny about that? And I swear to whatever God is correct that I was when I put on the suit, right? Because I was like, I don't want to wear a blue or black suit. I want to wear something different. I put on the suit and I looked at myself in the mirror and I was like, this looks nice, but I look like a matri-D. And I'm like, it would be very funny if I'm dressed, like if the same, staff is dressed like that.

Called it. And when we walked in, I was like, I really need to stop manifesting shit. Well, I mean, that is what you do and what people do in general is like things only happen when they are manifested. Right, yeah. So you did that. Yeah. You did that.

Yeah. So I was like, oh, God. Can we? It wasn't that bad. No one made a comment. Just me. I mean, oh, my God. This is such a big momentous occasion that we need to like remember it by purchasing something

fucking stupid. All right, well, I almost pointed there. Yeah, after, by the end of the year, you might be able to afford yourself

them. We're at 90 bucks. I thought that he just pocket watch you and said you're a broke bitch. Oh, no, no. Maybe by the end of the year would be able to buy yourself

something nice. You stupid fucking peasant. We started at 40. We got 50 this time. We got 50. I mean, if we are, if we are, you know,

as of recording three weeks into the month, average, in $100 a month, I could be walking out with a pretty good chunk of change by the end of this year. That's what I'm saying. You know, and if I just keep rage baiting him, it'll get better. Yeah. But I don't, I don't point just for anger. I point because I talk with my hands and we're doing a thing, you know? I think, I think it's mostly anger that you pointed out of me. I think we're going to tape my fingers now. I mean, you could do whatever you want. You could put your fingers anywhere. Like this? What am I doing? Did we do, hey. Did we do an Edward 40 Hands episode? Oh my God. That'd be so

good. We didn't. I've done it at your house numerous times. I think the only times you've ever done it have been with me. And underaged. Neil? Does it make it worse that I... Stop, Neil. Does it make it worse that I did Edward Ford. For those of you guys that don't know what Edward 40 hands is, by the way, it was an inner city thing when 40-ounce beers were $3. Such a... It's the best deal ever. Yo, such a crazy deal. You know what, like, you talk to boomers and like, oh, I bought my house for $15,000. I still don't think that's a deal than the 40. Yo, that really is not. Getting

fucking eight beers for six bucks. It's crazy. And not like, yeah, you can get 40 ounces of like old English or like cobra, which is like, it's malt liquor, technically. It's not even beer. But you get a butt light. You can get a butt light, coarse light for fucking, like. Dude, you guys don't understand it.

And if you do, but you take two 40 ounce beers and you take them to your hand. You know what's funny? for 40,000 patrons 40, Edward Ford, no? Well, fuck that I'm pointing, I don't give a shit, but yes. 40,000 point at me. It was only point at me. Yeah, yeah, it's only a point. Whatever.

40,000 patrons, Edward 40 hand Patreon episode. Two 40s. Wait, didn't we already hit that? No. Well, we're getting, we're very close. All right, how about we raise it a little bit? Come on, guys. Do you not understand marketing? No, it's perfect. I don't feel like.

It's perfect. I'm going to make a statement. Do you not understand marketing? I'm going to make a statement right now, and if you argue against it, you're racist. For $42,000 for Jackie Robinson. Now if you say no, then you're... What is it?

What is it? Now you're racist. Because what? You're the one you're making... What are you talking about? What are you attaching 42 to? You got to bump it up a little bit. You don't.

We just want to do it. I'm going to have to tape one hand at a time. So I feel like I need my hand. Oh, let's also... You're going to do it, too? Yeah. I really don't want to do this. I really don't.

He did point. Why don't? Why don't? The idea of drinking six beers in a one-hour episode? It doesn't need to be like that. Let's mull it over, but I do have some sponsors and we'll get some. Oh, my God, we're late. Oddly enough, yeah, I didn't even think.

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Thank you. What were we just talking about? I don't know. Do you remember? Oh, the 40s. Oh, yeah. I mean, that's an intense... But...

If you don't want to do it, you don't have to do it. Yeah, we'll do it. Thank you. I know that. You made it seem like you didn't want to do it. Yeah, I don't. But, I mean, there's fucking drinking six beers and then having a drive home. I would have to wait like, fucking, you wouldn't drive.

How would I get in? You send in a car? No, no, I mean, you wouldn't. Oh, that's a good idea. Yeah. How about we have the picky boys pay for that one then? Oh, I mean, this guy. A blade?

Blade? You want to take a chopper home? No, I'm not. We're going to land it in your backyard? Flex, that's why his yard's so big. I mean, call me a broke bitch now. Maybe one day you'll be able to afford something.

Yeah, I mean, it would be crazy if we get, since we're nominated, like, we would have to, like, get something, right? We're in this together? I feel like you're convincing the wrong people here. Oh, yeah. I'm in support. Yeah.

If we win. You know what's funny is, There's no one I have to convince but this guy. Yep. Because every person, like, when it came to, like, buying, like, something for, like, Radio City and MS. I was like, yeah. Yeah. And I was just like, someone fight back.

I was doing the whole, like, no. You know. If we do the Edward Forty hands, then I'll send a car if that's going to do it. Yes. Fire, dude. We will talk offline and figure this out. We'll figure it. So we're not committing.

Not committing. Okay. What percentage? I mean, that's a, I'll be honest, that's a big part of it is like the idea of driving. Driving. Yeah, because I would have to sober up. Well, then the car. So 60%?

That's a big part of it. Well, the car. I mean, dude, I wouldn't say, you're not going to drink six beers and drive away from me. No, duh, no, duh. No, duh. No one's saying that you're suggesting that. What is happening? Why are you guys pressuring me live on air?

Whoa. Who's presch? I just said you didn't have to do it. Oh my God, he's yelling at me now. I said you didn't have to do it. He hit me. Oh! I'm saying if it's the driving, then like, well, it's in the car.

Yeah, we'll talk about this. Okay. No pressure. Ask for a limo. Oh, do I get to pick the car? There's a be a... Like, if he's like, I'll get you a car and it's like a 2002 Nissan Al-Tabah. I don't want that shit.

You know what I'm saying? Do you want like a limo with a cheese pizza? I would like home alone? I would like something that has... Oh my God. A cheese pizza right now. It's the beginning of the year, so I'm eating like a deer. Yeah.

So. I'm eating like a deer as well and not drinking. This sucks. Yeah. This is not fun. But I would like something that preferably would have like a bathroom, so like a bus. Because I'm going to need to piss like a fucking racehorse. Or just send me home with jugs.

First of all, I'm not getting a bus. That's not happening. I think a limo is fair. There's no bathrooms on a limo. Just take the four years old. But there's enough space that I could piss in a limo if I had to. Oh. You'd be paying for the cleanup.

But also, first of all, what? You're going to pee on the ground? No, but God forbid some pee got on the ground. You could just be like, pull over. And piss where? At a place? My guy, when I have to piss, I have to piss now. Right.

There's no like. I mean, you make it here. You pull over, I assume. Places. I mean, I don't, I've stopped drinking water or any. Oh, you. You're talking about the way home. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Oh, well, like, we kill some time, and then you let out five, six P's, and then you go. I don't know. We'll figure it out offline. We don't know. But 42,000. How are you committing to that then? Pump it up.

Pump it up. 46? Okay, you're getting crazy. You got to give them something to, like, crawl toward. We are. This is perfect. We'll hit at no time. People definitely want to see that.

Yeah. It's been a long time since we were drunk on an episode. Has it been? I think that the last one was the... Oh, I drank, though. You drank her in the yardies. Those cameras went off and I saw Joey just like, I have this concept.

And Aunt and I were just sitting there like, I have this concept. But I think the Scorpion Ball episode was the last one we got drunk for. Yeah, that... No, no, no, the brunch one here. We were drunk for that? What I mean, we drank?

Oh, the beer tower. The beer tower. I used NAs. You did. You didn't. I didn't. But I wasn't like drunk on that. No, well, yeah. I may have been. I don't know. The brunch one, I think that we were. We were drinking champagne the whole time.

Yeah, probably. But I don't think I was drunk. I think I maybe had two. The Scorpion Bowl was definitely like... That was crazy. You've had Scorpion Bowls. You, of course. I mean, you're the king. Thank you. But, um... You've had Scorpion Balls? I've had one. Oh. Okay. Not, not... A plethora. Plethora or plethora? Yeah, you just made it sound like a dinosaur. What was that? It's cooler. Is it?

Yeah. Dinosaurs aren't cool? Crazy. I love dinosaurs. That's crazy. Yeah, we're bringing it back. Should we bring it back? We'll do like Patreon goals.

We'll do 40, then 45, and 50. We should put out a poll seeing if people want us to do that. Because we have like... What's the point? What's the point of that poll? It's going to be... Oh, you mean bring back the goals? Oh, I thought you meant the 40 hands.

Yeah, I think they would like that. if we put that, you're talking about the 40 hands put that on a pole? No, the goal. Oh yeah, why wouldn't they like that? Some people just be like, no, I don't really care. I wish for thinking over there. Yeah. No, I think that when we did those, did I ever tell you the story of the first goal that we did?

So it was the first goal when I first came on as co-hosts to get to 5,000. Okay. And it was, Joey will pelt me with eggs. By the way, not my idea. Yeah, I. I am like, we grew up in the jackass era, which by the way, they announced a new movie's coming out in June. What? They're still doing them?

I'm there, brother. Yeah, you're there. I am there. But I was like, Joey will pelt me with eggs. And he was like, all right. And we filmed it in his bathroom. He just climbed into my tub. And he, like, from standing through them.

And whether it be because I'm a little more doughy than he is, they weren't breaking when they were hitting me so it was fucking hitting me in the chest and it was just not breaking yeah so he would throw it and it would only break when it like hit like my arm and like the tub

where it met and then we film it it hurts he's like it's unusable footage it's no point it like you know there was way less of a budget back then

so like to video just looked horrible and I'm like the eggs weren't breaking like it's stupid and he's like are you fucking kidding wait I do remember actually I saw the clip recently on TikTok where you were like if we hit this thing I'll come in in a

tape suit yeah that was a crazy one because what people don't know about that and I did that that was painful I looked ridiculous and I had broken out with a rash after because of the adhesive oh right

this part of my body had broken out with like an intense rash and it fucking sucked. Damn. It was not good. I remember taking that tape off was interesting.

By interesting, you mean painful. I felt horrible for you. Yeah. Well, I think what we'll do this time around is like how I was on the receiving end of all these like,

I deserve it. You deserve something. Yeah. And I think it should be up to Ant to decide what that something is. Yeah? Okay. be careful

okay no actually leave it up to me oh no no I already said yes no but you said an idea you didn't say yes you said oh okay well I didn't expect this power he's gonna be oh a shot caller I don't expect this power

I'll think there is an episode I want to revisit that we did that included the shot callers I was thinking about it the other day do you remember the episode we did where it was like you should know like and it was like you asked me questions about things

that you like and I ask you questions about thing that I like All right. And like, if you didn't get it, I got shocked. Yeah, I mean, I don't trust you. I certainly don't trust them. Oh, I'm fair with that. And he's better to use more.

He's better to have the fucking shock button than I am. There's nothing I hate more than that besides a tarantial. Hey, how about this? I also bought new shock collar, so. How about this? No. It's weird that you bought them and you haven't used them yet. What do you use them for?

I've used them. I don't, not here. Where? Other places. In my underwear? Yeah, yeah, yeah, in my underwear. And my socks, don't forget. Yeah, it's socks.

What are you doing? Yeah, it sucks. Yeah, it's underwear. Can you do me a favor? Can we put out a poll? Just ask people what kind of stuff they want to see. Oh, don't let them do that. Oh, yeah?

Yeah, don't give them the power. Okay. We're going to be skydiving. See, this is why we need you. Would you skydive ever? No. No. I used to be like, yeah.

And now I have kids and I'm like, no. If I die skydiving, that's so stupid. That's so dumb. It's so dumb. Yeah. It's tough. Kids, I keep your feet on the ground, literally and figuratively. Yeah.

That's an incredible line I just came up with. That you're impressed with? So I'm bringing the shock colors in next week? Is that we're saying? No. I also... No. I'm always down to get shocked.

I have no problem with it. I don't like it. That was a pretty hard now, so... I don't. don't like it. We could throw one on him if he's like. Okay. We could also put one on your arm. Grow up. I don't like it. Grow up. You could do it. Oh, now who's pressure and who?

Yeah, pressure guy. You're a pressure washer. I'm not a pressure washer. Yes, you are. You're washing me. I'm not, stop that. You can't start the episode being so ashamed of your microdick that now you're going up with me micro-washing it. The term is micro-penus, one. Oh, sorry. I apologize for your condition. Two, I don't have a micro penis, although it's fine if you do have one. I don't know how he feels about it. You could mark me down for 10 more dollars, I just pointed. Oh, I missed it. It is fine,

but I'm not going to do it. Neil's still watching. Yeah, Neil, I really hope Neil checked out. And the backsheep boys. Yeah. It can't be involved with micro penises. Yeah, I can't.

I don't like the shocking. You could eat like spicy shit. That doesn't really, but, I mean, that sucks, but like, bothers me way less than the shock. What about a... It's the anticipation, I've made that mistake. I know what I could do with. I know what we can get them with.

If we mix a shot of olive juice and malort. What does that do? You hate olives. Oh, oh, I don't know why I was thinking olive oil. Is there anything that really makes you gag? I really don't... Like, tuna fish? No, you guys are...

You guys gotta grow up. That's the thing. You guys got to be grown job. I looked at Ann, and you know what he did? I know what you did? up. Thank you. I'm not on your side. And I'm getting bullied.

There's bullying going on. Hey, did you not do this? I sort of did that. Oh! I sort of did that. Now who's being the lying teller? I'm sorry, I'm tired. I feel like we are getting drunker. I know. We just talked about in the air. And I'm like,

if I hammered or something, what's going on here? All right. We'll figure it out. We're going to figure it out off there and we'll get back to you guys. But we're closing in on 40. And we'll see what happens here. Yeah, we'll be good. See what happens. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Thank you guys for joining us. Boy, I appreciate it. And I think is happy about it too. And- about me. You tell me.

Yeah. Yeah, what? I'm happy. it sounds like you're trying to convince me more bullying before we leave no we are jokes aside like the nomination for the iHeart uh podcast awards is because of you guys and uh we are truly truly appreciative and like humbled this all is like very crazy to us and just getting the opportunity to do this is amazing and then getting the chance to you know be validated by you guys is is unreal so thank you guys from the bottom of my heart.

Yeah, it's really cool to get that recognition because it's not something that we ever really expected, to be honest. I mean, all of this is pretty old. I'm not expected, so it's, but it's a really cool thing. So hope we win, but if we don't, no need to feel bad for us. We're just happy to be in the building, all right? But, uh, yeah, you guys can go follow the show at the basement yard on TikTok and Instagram and you can find, thin ice, baby. Thin, thin thin ice. You should know that. After all the bullying about his...

You're in with him! I'm in... You're not with... You're not on the same time as him! You know I can't ice skate, so I'm not anywhere near thin ice. That is all. We'll see you guys next time.