The Basement Yard - Crippled Joe's Inspirational Thoughts

Episode Date: August 16, 2016

I'm all alone with my half working leg & my inspirational thoughts... hold on to your damn seats. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome back to the basement yard. It is Monday, August 15th, and I am by myself today, and I'm also crippled. I am crippled. My fucking leg is completely fucked. Well, not completely. It's actually not as bad as, uh, as it appears to be. But, um, I, um, did this thing over the weekend where it was like, it's called, like, the Olympics in Long Island or some shit, and it's just basically, like, you go there and you play all these sports all day, and you represent a country, and then, like, it's like the Olympics. Like, you know, if you come in first, you get these many points, and, like, at the end of the day,

whoever has the most points gets the gold medal or whatever. And, uh, there was a football game that we were playing, and I was playing quarterback, and it's like a four Mississippi rush. So, like, the guy at the line after four Mississippi can run after me and try to tag me. So, the ref goes, says, four Mississippi, the dude starts running, so I throw a pump fake, right? I get this asshole off his fucking feet. He's in the air. I'm running around him. I don't know why I'm yelling, but I have pump fake. He jumps, so I take off, and I'm running, and then there's some guy in front of me, and I start trying to be Reggie Bush in USC, throwing juke moves at him, and in the midst of that, my knee goes, whoa.

What? And fucking comes out, and I feel like, like, my thigh, like, how do I, my knee and the rest of my body went completely different ways. I juke so hard that my body got confused, and I hurt myself, and I went straight to the floor. My fucking whole leg felt like it was on fire. And, um, I was really sad because I thought that, uh, I tore my ACL, but apparently I didn't tear my ACL. I haven't gone to the MRI yet. I, you know, I went to the doctor yesterday, but we'll get into that. But anyway, so I, I was really upset because, you know, I just got over this fucking ankle injury, and like, I just started being able to run recently. Like, I was like,

two and a half weeks that I was out of commission because my ankle was really messed up. I rolled there pretty bad. Two weeks? What the fuck am I talking about? It was like a month. I was out of commission, uh, because I rolled my ankle pretty bad at one of my football games, and then we had no, no games, like, after that. So I didn't, I wouldn't care, because I didn't miss any, I didn't miss any games because that was the last, uh, game of the season. And now I'm missing the entire season because of this fucking knee thing. And I don't know what it is. I'm wearing this big ass cast and I'm icing it and I'm doing all types of shit. It just sucks. Like, I can't bend it all the way and I'm limping around and shit. Oh, I hate it.

I hate it so much. It's terrible. But anyway, I went to the hospital and, um, you know, I, you know what? I tell jokes. You know, that's what I do. I'm a, like, uh, people call me a comedian. I wouldn't give myself that, uh, that much credit, you know, but people call me a comedian. So, you know, I'm a funny guy. I tell jokes, haha. So I go to the fucking, uh, the, wow. Okay. I need help. Jesus. All right. So I went to the emergency room and the lady's like, what's your name? And I tell her my name. And then she starts to ask me all these questions. And then she's like, do you have any allergies? And as a joke, I said, cats. And she meant allergies, like, to medicine. She was like, do you have any allergies? I said, yeah, cats. She looked at me

and then looked right back at her clipboard and probably wrote down fucking asshole on it because she did not laugh, smirk, blink, breathe, nothing. There was no movement out of this woman. She was just like, I was like, okay, no one fucks around here. And then, um, the complete, complete opposite side of the spectrum. Then one of the nurses comes in, she starts taking my, blood pressure and, you know, all the standard stuff, like whatever. And, uh, she goes, okay, just go on the other side and just go pick a room and just stay in that room to a doctor come, comes and get you, comes to get you. And, uh, I was like, doesn't matter which one I'm in. She's like, no, you know, pick whatever one you want. And I was like, wow, big decision. She laughed

like I told the funniest joke. I was like, oh, wow, big decision. This guy, he's got something. I was like, okay, Jesus, like it was crazy. That place was very confusing. Um, but the doctor, you know, he was pulling on my leg. He was pressing on it. He was doing, I was terrified. I thought he was going to rip it out of its socket and take it down the hole because he was really going in. He's like, yeah, you don't have a torn ACL because I, you know, I would have ripped your leg off if, you know, you did. So, uh, hopefully it's just like a meniscus. I really hope I don't need surgery because then I'll just be in pain for the next two months and I'll probably do my videos, fucking laying down on a couch. So they'll get even more

lazy in my videos. Anyway, last night went to the movie, saw a sausage party. Pretty funny. Uh, the ending took me by surprise. I'll be, I'll be honest right now. If you go see it, you'll know exactly what the fuck I'm talking about. It was however, like genius. Like there's a lot of like innuendos and just like hidden messages within this movie. I thought it was really well done. Um, but it was just funny because yesterday, one of my friends, Frankie, he also recently had surgery and he has a cane and a cast. So then I have this cast and we're fucking limping around the movie theater and people are probably like, what the fuck are these guys escaped from a hospital or something. Like we just looked bad as like, you know, a unit. We

was just really, it was really fucked up. And like Keith has like a fucked up knee and back and whatever. So it was just like, we were all broken. Who's fucked up? Anyway, um, my first ever live podcast is in two days and I have no idea what the fuck I'm doing. I'm going to be honest. I have no idea. I'm really not prepared. I haven't even talked to anyone from the comedy club. I haven't talked to anyone. I know it's going down. I know, you know, somehow miracle. We sold out two shows, which is unreal because I'm not even like trying to use very humble. No, I'm not trying to fucking do that. I'm being serious when they brought the opportunity to me to like, oh, we should do a live podcast at Carolines. I was like, uh, yeah, I guess.

And they were like, yeah, it holds like 280 people or something like that, or like 300. And I was like, I'm like, wow, well fuck. And I was like, these people are going to be completely, um, upset when I don't sell this thing out because they're like, oh yeah, you could sell it out. Don't worry. You got like a couple million people on Facebook. And I was like, dude, these people are like from like Ohio and Hawaii and shit. I'm like, we're not selling out a show. What are you, psychotic? And then we sold out two and I was just fucking blown away. I was like, Jesus, they like me. They really like me. Sorry. Sorry. Um, but yeah, this should, this should be fun. Um, I have an idea of what I'm going to do for the first one, which is at seven o'clock,

the first show, uh, the first show is at seven o'clock. And I'm just, I just said that like nine different times, but, um, the first show I'm going to have, I know there's two people that I'm going to have. I'm not going to say who they are because I want to keep it a surprise, but I have two people that I know we're going to be on it. Then the second one, I think I'm going to start off by myself and then maybe bring a guest in like halfway through or some shit. Um, but I really don't know what to expect. I hope, uh, you know, I entertain some people there. That would be nice. Cause, uh, you know, I have dreams of, of, of just like, I get up there and I'm like, so fucking penis, right? And then people are throwing like heads

of lettuce and tomatoes at me. I'm like, I'm sorry. Much funnier on the internet. It's not, but like just like my Twitter profile, it says I'm very underwhelming in person. I still think that's true. This sucks. Now I got a shave and shower to this thing. God, I don't even know how I'm going to get up the stairs. I'm going to have to like go up backwards and just, I don't know. I really hope, I really hope, man, that I don't need surgery because I'm just going to get super fat. This is going to suck. Oh God. Oh dude, you don't understand. Like my body was just, I think my genetics, like my family really, if I work out for two weeks, right? Two weeks is nothing. It's really nothing. But if I work out for two weeks straight, my body

looks drastically different. Like it looks like, wow, you guys been working out for months. Like it just, I look drastically different. But if I don't work out for two weeks, you're like, wow, what the fuck have you been doing for the past year? Like I, it's so, it's crazy. My body so quickly can go from, wow, this is really to what the fuck were you, you gave up? Are you do have a house? What's happening? It's so quickly that can happen. Like I could, I could turn into a piece of shit at like that. It just overnight it could happen. I don't even know. Some days I wake up and I feel nice. Other days I wake up and I'm like, we have to do something. And then, you know, that's what usually when I usually go to the gym. But now I can't even do that because I could

barely walk. I mean, I could hobble in there and like fucking do some bench press. But then that's a really piece of shit move. That's a douche baggy thing. It's like, yeah, fucking torn my ACL minute. Just fucking, I guess I'll just do arms and fucking chest then. Whatever. I'll just build this fucking chest, you know, brick house. Look at these wings. I'm not going to do that. I'm just, I'm just going to wait. Maybe I'll get fat. I don't know. You know what would be cool? This is so dumb. You know what would be cool though? Imagine I get to like 190. I've never been 190. The most I've ever weighed was 186. And I was just like, this is a problem. I, my jawline started to go away. Like my face started to get swollen and look like a grape.

So I was like, okay, we need to, you know, diet. And like, I like was, uh, what's that? Oh, I was paleo for like a month. I had like no process anything. Like it was the worst ever. Like I would drink water and have salads and like chicken. And that's it. And like fruit. I ate nothing else. It was the worst time. Every single day, I just wanted like a skittle. I was like, please, I just needed something with a taste. I need it so badly. But I lost, I lost a bunch of weight and then I gained a bunch of muscle because I was in the gym every day for a couple months, but that all went downhill after Vegas. As you know, if you're an avid listener of the baseman yard podcast comes out every day, every day, every Monday on iTunes

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everyone does this. They want you to say the, uh, the, um, website three times, right? That's why I go me undies.com slash basement. That's me undies.com. Like Mike, like I gotta say it three times because I think they think that you're all fucking stupid and you can't comprehend one, one round. Like you can't just say the thing. Once no one can fucking comprehend that, throw it in their face five times and then they'll get it. Maybe those idiots. Are you offended by that? I need to know because I'll, you know, I'll get back to these people like, Hey, listen, you know, I have really smart listeners. They're good with one. They're good with one. They got, they got this site me undies.com slash basement. That's four now. That might be eight. I don't

know. I've said it a bunch of times. I'm going to be honest. Um, okay. Oh God, it's getting hot in here and there's fucking fly. So I don't know what the deal is, right? Like I, there's the windows in here are locked. All of them are locked and there's no holes in the house. You know what I mean? There's no like whatever, but somehow there's always these little net fruit fly. Look, there's no fruit in here either. No, these little nets things are flying around and I guess they're all fucking cause I kill a bunch. I come back and there's still a bunch of them. So this is probably just like a whorehouse for these nets and flies because every time I come in, they're just reproducing. They're all fucking like in my recycling bin apparently cause every time I touch

that thing, it's like, you ever see green mile when, when, uh, the guy opens his mouth and all these fucking flies come out and like disappear into the fucking, uh, overhead light. Dude, that's exactly what it's had. When I kick my recycling bin, that's what it looks like. Okay. I'm exaggerating. It doesn't look like that, but you know, a good seven fly out. That's a shit ton. Seven fruit flies when there's no fruit. It's ridiculous. And so you know what I did? I bought, oh my God. Thank you. Thank you. God. I remember this because I need to know if this happens to other people. I ordered a dust buster, right? Then I get an email from Amazon and they're like, yeah, we tried to deliver it, but you know, we tried and, uh, yeah, you can go pick it up in

your post office. What the fuck do you mean? You tried. You tried. What was hard about it? Was there a moat? Was there an alligator in the moat? Was my lawn on fire? How did you try and fail? That's what I want to know. And I know some smart ass is going to go, it's not that they fucking couldn't do it. They needed a signature. It's a fucking dust buster. It was 20, I think it was $18. What the fuck do I have to sign for that? What the fuck? I don't understand that at all. We tried. I don't know. I didn't know. We tried. You know, we walked up to the house. You know, I don't know. I tried to knock on the door. I missed. That was it. I went home. The fuck? And now not only was that ridiculous, but then I had this fly fuckfest going on.

So I had to buy those strips. You know those strips, like you hang them and like they smell good to flies apparently. So they fly into them and then they get stuck and they die on there. It's really barbaric, but you know those things. So I bought a pack of them and now I just got an email from them. Yeah, I'll try it again. Dude, what the fuck? What is going on? Is my gate that hard to open? There's a lever. You just click it and you go in. That's it. Jesus Christ. My house is a rupees cube for these people. We try to do it now, man. I don't know where it is. Just pick it up in your post office. I'm like, come the fuck on. Can't even get the fly strips. By the time I get these strips, there's gonna be thousands of these things. They're fucking at

a crazy rate. A ridiculous rate. I probably walk out this door. There's 20 more. I need to get an iguana. Start shooting. It's tugging all over the place. Get three at a time. I'm sorry. Anyway, on a serious note, I had this talk with my friend the other day and I just wanted to bring it up. It was just about like, okay, this is gonna sound so cliche and shit, but I don't care because I mean it. But just basically like doing what you love, right? And I know a bunch of people just want, here we fucking go. But I swear to God, listen, I'm being serious. If you have listened to me ever, you're an idiot. No, I'm kidding. No, but like if you know me, you know, I don't, I'm not about this bullshit, but I'm serious when it comes to stuff like this. Because in all honesty,

you know, I honestly, I love doing, you know, comedy and just stuff like that and making people laugh. But on a deeper level, I think the reason why that I really like doing that is because I like helping people and just making sure other people are happy. You know what I mean? Because even when I was younger, like if my sister was upset, like I would literally sit there and just do whatever, like act like a cat or just do some stupid shit until she would laugh and I'd be like, okay, and then I would walk away. And she would yell at me the entire time, be like, can you please go away? And I wouldn't until she laughed because then I was like, I got her and I'd leave. But I think that's, you know, exactly what I wanted to do. And another thing that I really wanted to do was

just inspire people because I don't think that people really understand how like great they can be because a lot of people, especially, I don't know if it's my neighborhood or anything like that, but a lot of people are just completely okay with either the bare minimum or just like an okay thing. You know what I mean? And I don't think you should be. And you know, some people that's totally fine and they have other aspirations and like, you know, they just are okay with that. And I'm not talking to these people, I'm talking more to, you know, people who are very creative and artistic and, you know, have these talents, but don't really see a future in it because either it's, it's been, you know, they think it's outlandish or they just think it's like just

impossible for it to happen. But, you know, one of my friends, I was just talking to him and he's like kind of unhappy with his job and just stuff like that. And he's only 21 years old. And I told him like, listen, you really, especially in this day and age, you can really actually do whatever you want. Like I know, fucking 20 years ago, a cartoon named Mickey Mouse probably looked into the fucking camera was like, oh, I don't even, does that good? That was my first ever Mickey impression. I think it just sounded like a bunch of pigeons. But you really could do whatever you want now because we have these crazy apps and platforms where you can talk to people in China and fucking Germany and just like weird countries like Chile, like why is that country

named Chile? It's so weird. But yeah, it's, it's almost like, to me, crazy that you wouldn't pursue a side project because literally everything makes money. And, and you know, the famous saying like, if you're great at something, you should never do it for free, which is like, I don't like the wording of that because it sounds like you're like a greedy piece of shit. Like, I'm not doing this for free. I'm really good. But you know, from that saying, it's, it's true that if you master something, it's only a matter of time before someone, you know, offers to pay you for it. You know what I mean? Because if you're really good at something, and you're passionate about it, eventually you're, you're going to master it and you can get paid for it. So if like, if you're

into fashion, or you're into design, or you're into, you know, comedy, or, or just whatever you're, or you could draw, or you could do whatever, there is so many things you can do as a side project from your regular job that maybe you could turn into your full-time job eventually. You know what I mean? Like this YouTube stuff that I did for a while, and I don't mean to sound like I fucking know everything here, because I know I'm just a 24 year old dickhead who got lucky, and you know, whatever, take this over to grain assault, or whatever that fucking saying is, but what the hell was I talking about? So when I was working, when I first started this YouTube thing, I wasn't making enough money obviously to support myself, and I never really thought about

it being a job. It was just kind of thing I like doing, and I did it because, you know, it was fun. You know what I mean? I wanted to show people something. Hey, I made this from scratch. You know what I mean? It was just fun to me, and when I was working for Lee Daly, I was an editor and producer there, and I would work there at 9 to 5. I would get up for the gym at 5 a.m., go to the gym at 6, come home at like 7, whatever, and then get to work by 9, and then work 9 to 5, then I'd go uptown to a comedy club and do podcasts, and then I would go home, and I would work on videos, and I would sleep like four hours a night, and I was totally okay with that. I never felt like, you know, because there was no deadline, there was no person who like, get this done. You know,

there was no, there was none of that, but I was totally ready to lose sleep and just like, just do whatever it took to do this shit that I wanted to do. Like, I didn't see it as work, and it sounds like a lot of work when you're like, oh my god, you went, you did this, this, and this, and this, and then, you know, you barely slept, but it's like working, when you get into a rhythm like that, which I'm not in now, by the way, I'm not in that rhythm right now, and I, you know, whatever, we'll get to that in a second, but when you get into a rhythm like that, you almost feel like crazy when you're not working, like relaxing feels weird, and I don't think that's a bad thing if you're chasing something or just like developing something, because for instance,

there's times where I'll get into a good rhythm, and you know, the gym helps in the morning, like, you know, for some reason it helps, it sounds like it would tire you out, but when you go to the gym really early, and then you go to your job, I feel like afterwards, I have more energy than if I just woke up and went for whatever reason, I don't know, and I don't even drink coffee, hate the shit, it tastes like, you know, I don't even know, like, this is like, tangy shit, I don't know, it has a weird aftertaste, I don't like it. Um, what the fuck was I talking about? Anyway, so I was working that job and doing all these things as a side project, because I really enjoyed doing them, and I didn't really know what I was doing,

and it's at the time, I just kind of, it was kind of just second nature, I was like, fuck it, I just like doing this, I'll just do it, and then after a while, I was able to quit my job, well, I kind of went on, I kind of saved up money, like I saved up, I think, 20 grand from my job, and I was, yeah, I was 22 years old, I saved up 20 grand, and I was like, I'm gonna leave this job, and just focus on all the things that I want to focus on, and we'll see where it goes, and if I don't land on my feet, then I'll try to go get another job, but if not, then, you know, it'll be dope, and thank God it worked out, and I put all my focus and energy into making these YouTube videos, and kind of creating this platform for myself,

and you know, it's really, I have no one to thank, except the people who are sharing this stuff all over the fucking world, it's really insane, but yeah, it was just, you know, I was never afraid to do a side, like a lot of people too, because I have these talks with people all the time, and a lot of people, what they tell me is that they're, you know, they admit that they're kind of afraid of what people would think, like, oh, this kid's making a clothing line now, what the fuck is this, you know what I mean, like, but dude, who cares, like, who gives a shit, and I know people say that all the time, but really, who fucking cares, there's too many distractions in this world, you know what I mean, we have all the tools to create things that we want to create, these cool

ideas, like, everyone has new ideas, everyone has probably great ideas, but they never act on them, because they're taught that they shouldn't, or they're just socializing to thinking that it's not cool, or it's just stupid, but, like, or they're just distracted, you know, because there's things, like, you know, Snapchat, like, dude, there's times, like, right now I'm in a funk, right, I know when I can be completely real with myself also, I know when I'm doing a good job, I know when I'm doing a bad job, right now I am doing a bad job, I am not in my rhythm at all, there was a time where all I thought about, I was obsessing with just the content, being good, you know, going to the gym every day, making sure I get everything done, not cutting corners, like, little

things, like, little, tiny things that I would never let go, to give you a stupid example, right, you know when you go and toss something into the, that's a stupid example, because a lot of people wouldn't do that, but basically, like, if I did dishes, right, and I put them into the washing, the fuck, what the hell is that called, Jesus Christ, dishwasher, god damn it, it's on here, so if I did dishes, I put them in the dishwasher, and I walk away, but I walk away in my mind thinking the sink is kind of dirty, like, on most days I'll go, fuck that, I don't get hair, I'll just go, but then, but when I'm in my fucking zone, this is so, so tiny, I'll, like, have to go back and just to do it just for, like, the karma, like, I need to get everything done,

you know what I mean, and that's just how I put myself in those certain, when I get into a rhythm, I have to get everything done that I know needs to be done, like, little things like that even, you know what I mean, it's like a stupid example, but, you know, that's just, you know, I don't know, it's just the only example I get to think of, honestly, it's just little things like that, that you know should get done, that sometimes you'd be like, I'll do it later or whatever, it's like, no, you got to do it now, you always got to do it, but there's so many distractions, like, people get called on Snapchat, like, right now I'm in that funk where, you know, I could sit on the couch and I'll just look through Instagram and Snapchat and Twitter

for like two hours, dude, two hours of what? Looking at Snapchat stories? I don't give a fuck what you, like, dude, what? Like, why do I give a shit? Why do I look through it? I don't even know, why do I even watch, I don't know, are people even watching Snapchat stories? Are they just clicking so that they don't have, like, you know, on Snapchat it says recent stories or whatever? Like, are you just clicking through so that you have nothing there? Like, you're wasting time doing that, clearing that out because you have like a weird OCD or whatever, you know what I mean? Like, why we, and if you are watching them, why the fuck are you watching them? Like, who cares what some fucking chick from your science class in high school is

doing now? I don't give a fuck? Jesus, look at that filter, who gives a shit? My god, it's so stupid, and like, it's stupid, and I know it's stupid, but I can't help it, I'm human, I get caught in it too, and right now I'm in that funk where I'm just not focused, and, you know, it helps that I'm able to realize that and then get out of it because it only lasts for like a couple days or like, a week is like, I would say five to six days is usually how long it lasts for me, like a funk, and then I'll be on a good schedule for a little while, but I can fall into these traps where it's like, what the fuck am I doing? And like, Instagram, right? Like, why are we so fixated on this fucking app? What are we doing? It's so stupid, like, think about

your, what you're doing with your time, okay? And I promise this all makes sense, I know I'm just like, rambling, and like, I wrote some notes down on a thing, so I wouldn't do this, but I am rambling anyway, and I'm all over the fucking place, but I promise it all means something, but Instagram, right? We are all on Instagram doing what? Constantly trying to impress people, or trying to prove to people that we are a certain way. And it's completely counterproductive, because you shouldn't have to prove who you are, or, you know, if you're cool or, or anything, but that's what we do, and I don't know why we do it, but we do it, and it's just like, when you start to realize that you can take the time that you spend on, you know, with these

distractions, and you can put it into useful things, like these side projects that I was just talking about, like things that you're passionate about, and it doesn't even matter what it is, because like I said, you get paid for anything. People are getting paid to play video games on the fucking internet. There's professional video game players, and like, you know, there's people, people made every, like people make everything, people who are, think about tires, right? The first person who made a tire, right? So, now think about the second person who made a different tire, right? He saw a tire and he was like, wow, tires are dope, and he just was focused on this tire until he finally came up with one that was better, right? And I know that sounds

like a stupid example, but think about it, it's a fucking tire. Who really gives a shit about tires to the point where you're like, this guy's spending day and night thinking about tires? But think about it, if you are passionate about something, and you put the time in, you can either make a better version or a cooler version, or just something new, you know, with your, if you apply yourself, and you'll be able to make a fucking new tire and shit, right? Michelin's got all these things, all the grooves, it'll never slip into fucking snow. We always slip, dick. Make some fucking tires where we don't slip. Sorry. I don't really know if this all makes sense, and I hope that you're able to take all my rambling and kind of piece it together

for it to make sense, but I'm being completely serious. I'm not trying to be a fucking idiot here, and I'm not trying to like, patronize anybody. I just, you know, I'm just speaking my mind. I'm by myself here, but I'm serious. It's just so easy, and I'm just all about creating things, and like, you know, when someone is like, yo, I really want to do this, like, I'm all about it. I want to help, you know what I mean? I want to do this. I want to help you, you know what I mean? Like, especially with my friends, like, if any of them have like a dream that they want to chase or something, like, dude, let's fucking do it, you know what I mean? Like, I will obsess about it until I'm ready to blah, blah, blah,

to do whatever the fuck it is. You know what I mean? I think, I just want people to think like that. I just hate, I don't know why it bothers me so much, and people just, people always say to me like, why do you care? I don't know, but I do. I do care. I care that people are blind, in my opinion, you know what I mean? I'm stupid. I don't fucking know. But I'm saying, like, I'm just, I'm just, I just want people to be aware that there is so much they can do and that they can offer. I bought a bunch of artwork for this place that is only done by, you know, these random people that I find on Twitter who are good, who can fucking paint and make crazy art. I'm like, dude, I'll buy that off. Like, this is amazing, you know what I mean? Because

I'd like to think that, you know, unfortunately, a lot of people need to see a little bit of success in order to continue chasing their dreams. And if buying a painting is going to, you know, kickstart you, I'm all about it, especially if I enjoy it. You know what I mean? Like, if you're really good and I like this painting, I'm fucking buying it. I don't care how much it costs. You know what I mean? I'll buy it because I like looking at it and I appreciate the fact that it's, you know, just, I think I'm just like all about art in the moment. I don't know why, but I just, I like it for some reason. It's just amazing to me because I can't draw. I'm like, just not that artistic in that way. So I'm just all about it and I just love it.

So I buy it and I, you know, try to talk to these people as much as possible. I'm kind of like, it's just awesome. I just think that's fucking cool. And like the people that spend their time doing that, you know what I'm saying? Like that's exactly what I'm talking about. You, you have this talent, like there's no reason that you should, like, I don't know how you could be an artist, but be passionate about your cashier job. And that's not a knock on cash, cashiers. I'm just saying, like, if you have this creative part of you, like, I know you're not passionate about being a cashier because you have so much shit going on in your head. If you're able to be that artistic and creative, there's no way. And it's like, I don't want you to think that you have to

do that all the time. Like you should always be pursuing a side project at all times, in my opinion. You know what I mean? That's just me. And if you're the same kind of person I am, that like, you should always have a side project because eventually it'll work out. Like I'm not special. I'm not fucking, that's why I really hope you don't, I'm not trying to like be like, oh, follow your dreams. Like I did it. You can do like, I'm not special. There's nothing special about me. The only thing that's different is that I did it. Like I tried. You know what I mean? I didn't even like, I didn't even call it trying. Like I just did it. That's it. I was doing it and I had no, I wasn't thinking of a dollar amount of how much money I wanted to make

or or anything or anything like that. I just liked doing it. I just did it. That's it. That's all I wanted to do. I wanted to do this and that's it. It didn't fucking matter who the fuck said anything. I don't care. You know, you don't think all my friends are like random people that like knew me from high school. Like this kid's fucking gay. Nice videos, you fag. I didn't care. I was like, dude, I'm fucking like doing it. I'm fucking doing it. I don't care. And I don't care who sees it and put it up on YouTube, Facebook, everywhere. Everyone's going to see it. You can hate or love it. And thankfully it worked out. Thankfully, I got better at it. And you know, I would love to use this platform to inspire people to do the same and you don't have to make

YouTube videos or you know, and I really hope that I'm not saying like, if you see a money making opportunity, go after it because that's not what I'm saying either. Like something that you're really passionate about. Like I don't want you to think of like something, because you know you have those conversations with your friends, like you're like drunk and you're like, dude, what if they made like a car that could park itself and just, yeah, like dude, that already fucking exists. And it's like you have these ideas. You're like, they're just money making opportunities. I'm not talking about that. I'm talking about just really things that you're passionate about because if you chase money, then I think it's harder to build something.

Like you have to love it in order to be able to build it. Because if you're only thinking of money, then you're, man, I don't know if this makes sense, honestly, because in my opinion, I really feel like if you're chasing money, you're doing it for the wrong reason. Like you have to be doing something because you love doing it, because then you're not even going to realize that you're fucking doing it. You know what I mean? It sounds like a lot of work. If you have a side project, you're like, already worked nine to five. When I get home, I just want to fucking relax. I don't want to just start working again. I want to take a shower and watch fucking, I don't know, what do people watch nowadays? Game of Thrones is over. I don't know. The night of, I don't know, I got to start watching

that. My friends love it, but ADD is kicking in. Yeah, but it doesn't sound like a lot of work, because subconsciously, you do these things anyway. If you're really interested in them, you do it anyway. You know what I mean? Maybe you make little fucking jewelry, or you like, you customize this, or you're good at drawing, or you can turn anything into a business. And it's not about it being a business. It's just about being able to pay the bills with doing what you love. And it's all really fucking possible. I swear to fucking God, it's so crazy. And that's why I started renting this place, because it's just a space for me to be able to do that. And I have to start creating new things, because everything that I'm doing now is eventually going to burn out, and I'm going to

have to fucking figure it out. And I'm sort of excited for that, because I'll have to be at my best, because I've done that to myself so many times in my life. And that's when everything starts to work out. I dropped out of college. I had no degree, no money, and no job. I was like, I need to figure something out. And along the ways, you figure things out. If you really just believe in yourself, seriously, and I'm not trying to patronize anybody, or just be Disney, if you really just believe that you can do something, if you can just envision doing it, and envision yourself at your most successful point. If you can do that, there is no way that you can't be successful. If you just believe that you can do it, you're going to do it.

There's really nothing that someone can tell me, like, yo, you can't do that. And if I had nothing else to do, I would fucking do it. It doesn't matter what it is. It doesn't matter. I'll figure out a way. You know what I mean? That's how you have to think. You have to think that. You have to think that you could do anything. You have to think that. You can't just be like, I don't fucking, what do you mean? What do you mean I could fucking do that? Like, I remember my friends were like, yeah, but you got fucking lucky. I did, but I also fucking worked my ass off. And like, dude, my videos in the beginning sucked. Horst tick. Oh my God, those were bad. I'm sorry for getting all inspirational. I know

people like, ah, tell us a joke. Give us the dumb tweets. But, dude, I'm really passionate about this, man. I really want to inspire people to make cool shit. And if possible, if I think it's really cool, I want to be a part of it. And I want it to be built here in this space. I really do. I really, that's all I want to do. I really would love to, you know, to do that. And a lot of people are afraid to even tell people like their biggest dream. Because they think it's stupid. Or they're like, you know, that I don't know, they think people will laugh at it. Or they're just not brave enough to say it. You know, and I'm not, I really, I just want to make people happy. I want to make a lot of money,

obviously. So I can be in a, you know, a position where I can help people, you know, help my family, help my mom, help my friends, whatever. Because I don't need a lot of money. I don't really. Like I don't need a lot of money. I like, I don't need nice things. I don't have anything nice. I dress like an idiot. Like there's nothing special about my wardrobe at all. I have a pair of Yeezys, but you know, that's it. There's nothing else. Like everything that I have is like from Odell's and like H&M. That's it. Forever 21. T-shirts like $13. Like there's nothing special about it. But I really just want to make cool shit. And I want to inspire people, other people, to make cool shit too. And I want to be a part of it. I want to help. I think I have, you know,

I could contribute to anything in some sort of way. And if I can't, then, you know, I'll find someone who can, I just, I just really, I just really like creating new things. I really do. I'm really passionate about that. And I'm not afraid to like say that. And I don't want anyone else to be afraid to say what they're super passionate about, or what they want to do, or just whatever. Dude, I don't care what it is. It's not crazy to me. It doesn't matter what it is. And I know some people are closed-minded, and they're probably listening to this, and they're going like, what is this kid fucking talking about? But, however, there is someone listening to this right now that knows exactly what I mean when I say that you're afraid to say exactly what it is

that you want to do because your friends will make fun of you, or your parents will be like, shut the fuck up and go be a lawyer or something, you know? But dude, I'm telling you right now, you can't be afraid to tell people. Not even to tell, you don't have to tell anyone, but you can't be afraid to do it because you can't, anyone's capable of doing anything. Anyone is capable of doing anything. No one's special. No one's special. That's the moral of the story. No one's special. Okay? No one. And you have to put that in your brain forever, and all you have to do is just keep envisioning yourself on top. You know what I mean? I was never starstruck by anybody because I figured one day these people are going to want to hang out with me. I'm telling you, they're going to want

to hang out. They're definitely going to want to hang out. Taylor Swift's going to call. She'll be like, hey, come on my birthday party, but I can't make it. I'm playing checkers with a fucking, I don't even know. Someone, I'm losing it guys. I'm out of my mind. My fucking throat is sore. I've been yelling this whole time. God damn it. I hope that this doesn't sound as crazy as I think it is because it really does sound fucking crazy to me now that I'm thinking back on it. But seriously, don't, just don't be afraid to do whatever it is the fuck you want to do. Like, like I said, especially now, it's like we have the cheat code. We have more distractions, but we also have more resources. Like we have distractions like the Snapchat and all the fucking

bullshit, whatever it is, which can be, which are good, can be used in a, you know, a productive way, but we all choose not to, you know? We could, we could use it for the good, but instead we'd rather double tap titties and fucking upload stories that no one gives a shit about. God damn it. But seriously, I'm really, I'm done. I'm done talking. I'm sorry. Like I said, believe in yourself. If you can envision it, you can do it. Okay. I'm not crazy. I'm also not special and neither are you. All right. Just remember that. You're not special. Robert Downey Jr. Dude, whatever the fuck his name is not special. Channing table, chatting tables. Channing Tatum, not special. Great looking guy, not special though.

These people just did it. Just fucking do it. This sounds like Nike now. Jesus Christ, there's sponsorships all over this fucking thing. Just fucking do it. In Shia LaBeouf, he was onto something. Do it. That was really good. It sounded just like him, but just seriously, there's no, just fucking, just do something. Who cares? And it's going to suck at first. By the way, let me just let you know, let me, let me, let me have a, okay. Let me let you in on a secret. Anything you try doing for the first time sucks. It sucks. Okay. It's going to suck for a year probably. Okay. It's going to suck all the time. And it's not going to be successful at first. Maybe it will, but most likely not. But that

doesn't mean you stop fucking doing it. If you like doing it, just keep fucking doing it. Eventually you're going to get good. You're going to get great at it. And then people are going to be like, wow, this is great stuff. Whatever the fuck it is. God. All right. That's enough for my inspirational thoughts here. But if you're coming to my show on Wednesday, please laugh. I'm trying my best. And I'm also crippled. So I'll be hobbling all over that stage. So that should be nice. But anyway, and if you did buy a ticket to one of those shows, then thank you. That really means a lot. You were part of the first ever live show that I'll ever, that I ever did. So that means a lot. So thank you. And also,

I will see you guys next Tuesday, which is tomorrow. Have no idea what the fuck I'm doing then either. The only reason why I started doing this podcast today is because I was procrastinating, procrastinating, coming up with an idea for tomorrow. So I'm completely fucked. Who knows if something will come out tomorrow? Probably will, but you know, whatever. Anyway, thanks for listening. Yeah, motherfuckers.