The Basement Yard - This Is Not My Show

Episode Date: July 25, 2017

On this episode, @AntVino takes over as host & interviews me. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome back to the basement yard. I am All right, here we go one more time Do we have to take two no Welcome back to the basement yard today. I am joined by a very special guest some of you might know him He's all right Joe Sanagato, how are you? I'm very big fan of your show. I thank you for having me today. Thank you I'm Anthony DeVino. I'm what's your middle name? Excuse me your middle name. Um, my little name is Nicholas. Is that real? Yeah, okay? 100%

I just learned that I'm a kind of a fan of yours. I heard about you from a small child Right, and I said let me see what this kid's about and Welcome to my show. No problem. Did you like what you saw or no? No, okay? I just brought you here. I figured that yeah We're taking we can't take sips at the same time. There's gonna be a pause. Can't do that. That's a picture. You had a glass before Mm-hmm. Oh, yeah. Wow. My voice is cracking already. It's gonna be a long show. Let me tell you this is gonna be good, huh? Yes, anyway, what are we doing? So what are you doing today? What's going on? Who's phones ringing? So that was me. Sorry vibrate horrible host very so today. Um, I'm here to interview you

Okay, about your life and your upcoming You know, I'm all excited about this. Are you gonna do that? Yeah, we're taking them out We're gonna fuck around or what do you want to do? This is for real. I'll put this on the fucking ground I don't give a shit. I'm not mad Yeah, okay Put that on the ground. Um, I have a couple of questions that I um Accumulated over my past of two hours So that whole sense was a train wreck, but let's keep moving doesn't make sense

Okay, I'm gonna ask you a couple of questions sure and I'm gonna answer them very honestly as well. I hope so because that was my goal, right? That's what I'm gonna do. Great. So I'm gonna ask you the first question. That's kind of obvious We all want to know. Excuse me one second Thank you The first question is um, how did um, how did it be how how did it become a you? You know, how did I become a star? How did I become a star YouTube star just come to mind? You know, just you know, well to be quite honest, I think it's just

Consistency, I mean, I feel like when you start doing it, you know, when you start doing anything, you're not like You're gonna be a star one day I just did it every single week and in five years six years or something like that and then all of a sudden It's just like oh shit. It wasn't really like all of a sudden though It was kind of just progressively built Over time like a lot of youtubers I feel like just blow up out of nowhere They have one video where they do like a fucking prank where like some black eye punches him in the face because they grab their wallet

They make a bunch of money from all these millions of views. I never did any of that It was kind of just progressive over the years like I'm for two years I feel like I made videos and they were getting like 200 300 views, which I was psyched about by the way I used to I don't know if you remember I used to tell you remember I was like, yo It's definitely 80% looks 20% Like that's it. That's what I that's what I thought it was That's why you're you're big 80% looks 20% talent. I'll take it though. It'll take 20 20 is good enough for me Do you remember back in the day when?

We had the you know what I was just about get ahead. I was about to bring it up Yes, remember that what video that the very first video wasn't the very first I don't know you're talking about we're talking about two different things right now All right, you go first. Okay. I was gonna say do you remember when I would take my mom? It was a camera that would record on cassette tapes and I would fill remember I filmed all of us making a fire in my front yard. Yep. Oh, I had the infinity back in the day. I Remember that I remember that day clearly. I don't but like first time we lit a fire. Everybody was nervous like oh, no I was gonna burn down that was gonna put a lot of cardboard. Yeah in the fire

Yeah, it flew everywhere not not the best idea to do that Remember that that was good. That was I remember because you um you had the video camera And you would turn the screen around so we could see each other right very bad quality. Oh, it was really bad It was like on fucking VHS and shit. I remember back then this was one like jackass was like a thing So we would do anything to like like I remember I had two medicine balls and I would like giant ones not like medicine like No, like a yoga ball, I think there's a difference between those whatever not like the big one

Yeah, the bouncy the big bouncy ones and we just had Keith and Frankie just run at each other as fast as I could in my front yard and Just bounce off of each other and like there's so many like injuries and shit Keith almost broke his neck That would have been the second time that he broke his fucking neck Keith actually broke his neck for anyone who doesn't know that he actually broke his fucking neck. I was there for that Yeah, that was that was a pretty brutal one. We're playing that was a pretty brutal one We're playing football and he he like tackled something Keith was a fucking animal We were young like like people think we're making that up He was a fucking animal when he was younger when we would play tackle football. He would level everybody

He was like a first overall pick. He was like the best defensive player We had yep, and then one day we were playing these kids that were like much older than us And it was this big-ass kid that they brought I hated and Keith was like leveling all game And there's one time he went to go tackle him and his head like went up as he hit the kids and his neck broke and Then he was like yo, Joe. I can't play like my neck hurts. I was like dick We got we got a fucking you have whiplash like just get in the game We need you right it's like I'm not playing then he went to the doctor and they're like you're fine

Just like it's whiplash whatever a week goes by he's not fine He goes back to the doctor and the other doctor was like you got a broken fucking neck So he was walking around no support on his neck Just with a broken neck just walking around with it How does one doctor say yeah, man like they can't tell if it's a broken right then you you shouldn't have a job That's a broken neck. I feel like that's the easiest thing to diagnose you take one extra. You could see a break. Am I crazy? Yeah But like I don't know he walked around with a broken neck But yeah, he had a broken neck and then he I broke some kids hand that day by tackling him. Did you yeah?

I was very happy about I'm not gonna say names Don't even remember like yeah, you're like I'm a superstar, bro I just broke his hand like he was running like remember we were playing with linemen that day Yeah, he ran up the line I tackled him and he ran off the field with a broken hand. I was like I don't remember this I do as Dylan he remembers. I Never broke anyone's anything. Oh, that's a lie. I When I was younger I was a pitcher like I hate playing I hate baseball now like I'm not good anymore But when I was younger, I was like a really good pitcher and it would pitch me like every game super illegal

My elbow is done because I could throw hard and this one kid I Pitched at and it just got away from me and hit this kid right in the face and we were super young We were playing like the midgets field. That's what they call it. Not actually not the Peeweez But so I had to have been like 11 maybe and I hit this kid right in the face And he was bleeding like crazy his nose his orbital bone or the audible Orbital orbital bone Shattered like his jaw was fucked up like his whole face got messed up And I didn't find out that it was that bad until years later when I saw him again

I don't even remember his name though. I met Dominic playing baseball Dom Stolz second And you were on to your playing second I was like, hey man nice deal and he was like, hey, thanks, bro That was it and then ever since then you guys been just making out make out hard hard Yeah, that was a good story Joe. That was a great story. Thank you. Let's carry on with my question Please. Oh, yeah, sure. All right. Excuse me. I'm Lock your phone Typing for no reason. So, um, let me ask you a question graduating high school, right? All right

What did you did you know what you wanted to be or you? Well when I was graduating high school funny story, you're supposed to submit your applications to college and I think in like December or even earlier or something and I didn't do any of that, but I told my mom I did I was like, yeah I submitted to all these tools and stuff like that didn't do any of that then Cuz I was very unsure about going to college I just didn't think it was for me and I didn't I didn't know what the hell I wanted to do so I was like, I'm not gonna go away and just

Fucking piss away 20,000 $30,000 exactly when I'm studying fucking nothing probably and have no direction Like I'm gonna go away and party and shit like I just didn't want to do it so like a week before not a week honestly like a month before I Graduated I went to my guidance counselor and she was like you could probably only get into a community college And I was like, I'm cool with that like whatever. There's a community college around here, which It's very hard to get in I submitted a month before and I got in you know That was a joke and you don't they'll take anybody they'll take anyone they could probably they'll take it doesn't matter It doesn't matter what your GPA is you could be five. They'll still be like fuck it put him in the class

Queensborough community college and I went there for a semester and at the time I still didn't know what the hell I wanted to do and then I Don't know why but I signed up because I signed up so late, too. I had Saturday and Sunday classes at 8 a.m At 8 a.m. Math classes and I didn't miss any of them and this was like 18 19 years old We're like you want to just go out and fucking party with your friends and shit You know what I mean because that's still the age where like that summer like before you're going to college and shit Well, like that semester like everyone's throwing parties and stuff like tax like I'm in college now I'm fucking let's drink a beer and I didn't miss any of those classes

So it wasn't even about like the actual school work. I just realized I'm barefoot again. Everyone's gonna fucking hate this I'm barefoot on your show crazy on your shoulder. You should go get sneakers. I'm not gonna get sneakers, but anyway Then I signed up for another semester of classes, and I don't know why I did I went to one class By the way, my first semester GPA was like a 35. It's pretty solid. That's pretty damn good. Yeah, so it was good Joey, I can't I can't even say I remember you going to school when we were young. You're like, I don't remember No, I went for but I was only a semester That's why everyone no one like really remembers because it was quick. I signed up for another semester of classes pay the money. I Don't know why it went to one like art class and I'm sitting there

And I was like, I'm getting the fuck out of here And it was literally like 10 minutes into the class and I was like I'm out and I just left everyone was confused the teacher It's like the fuck is going on but she didn't say anything I just left and I would just sit in my car and then for like a month I would drive all the way to Queensborough and park my car outside and just not have it in me to go in And I would just sit out there and just fucking I was like, I don't know why it would do that But I had no idea what the hell I wanted to do

I was working in a pizzeria at the time. Actually, that's not true when I was 18 that whole year of my life I didn't have a job But I had that one semester but after that semester I was not working or or going to school. I was just like The a piece of shit. That's the only way you can find it I don't even know like I can't when I think back on it I'm like, I don't even know how that's like Possible because that's not even possible for me now I can't like not just sit there and just not do anything. It like drives me insane. But yeah when I first

Graduated high school. I think that was the question, right? It was like what I want to do. I had no idea I was doing the YouTube to you. What what I like just started doing the YouTube thing then and At that at that point there was no such thing as a like a youtuber really besides like Jenna Marbles But everyone else it wasn't like you could make a living off. You're right The YouTube wasn't like a huge there wasn't any like yeah, there wasn't vloggers There wasn't prank videos or any of the shit. There was none of that It was just like a thing I did because I like doing it We I've been doing it my whole life when I was making those like videos when we were younger

So it wasn't even like a thing. I didn't I knew that if I posted on YouTube It would be just a good look and hopefully someone would see it and they'd be like, oh, you know, this is Meanwhile if they did see it They'd be like fuck that kid because those videos when I go go back on them are fucking awful. It's so bad No, they're pretty fucking bad, but I think that answers that question Do you remember our first video the interviews we were just like, yo, let's just interview each other Yeah, I had a bubble vest on remember that yeah glasses people still look for that They're like, you know, where's that video because I for private I have it still but it's private like no one could watch it

It's so bad. It's so bad. It's just like I want to meet you and Keith. Yeah, we're just acting like Guido's yeah Ricky turn around Ricky turn around. This is your name for some reason. I forgot mine, but it was so bad I remember making a joke saying that I lived in north vagina Yeah, yeah, like yeah, because I get so much like that's how you're editing though the cut scene like trap No, it wasn't that bad. That's why I was like, yo, this is pretty funny It was it was it was something that was like the third video ever that I made I was good on YouTube and then we did the The game show and Dylan was the host. Oh when it went a date with it When a date with a fugitive that was hysterical. I wasn't even in that video. I just shot it

Yeah, and like four of my friends were in it one hosted the other three were like these fucking fugitives or whatever It made no sense honestly All this stuff is private. You can't see it and I refuse to take I refuse to put it out because it's just embarrassing I mean it just you did take it down. Yeah, it's I still have it though So if I want to go back and watch it, I could go back and watch it. I want to watch it Yeah, yeah, I don't want to be around. I'll send you a link You go watch it on your own time All right, so next question here we go. All right, so

The ideas for like your podcast and videos is it hard to come up with I've said this on numerous occasions, I've run out of ideas two years ago and it's really just like I Don't even know it's like it's only because my backs against the wall And I'm like I need to figure it out that I figure it out because I try to tell people this all the time like it I Know that I have a lot of things that I do like I have the podcast and I do vlog videos and do the other the sports Podcast and other people's lives and stuff like that But I really feel like I have no work work ethic at all because I don't consistently Put in the time I feel like it's like when I put myself my back against the wall all the time

And that's the only reason why shit gets put out because I know I got to do it But if I would just sit and take a whole day and just bang out a bunch of stuff I could relax and like have things just release and I can't do that. I don't know why yeah I was gonna say why don't you just plan ahead like yeah, I know I that's the most logical thing to do And I'm pretty sure that's what everyone does and I don't I just can't literally Nothing is done in advance The only time it's done in advance is if I have to because it's some

Person sponsored the video and they need to see it before it goes out Even then they'll get it like two days before and it'll kill me. Well, you're doing a great job. That's crazy I mean, I fucking hope we'll see the ship is gonna sink eventually, you know Then we'll figure that out. I had a I had a question about one of your podcasts other people's lives Yeah, you talk about other people's lives, right? Right. We'd like interview strangers and shit. What's the craziest story you've gotten? It depends it's all like It's interesting because when we started the show I do the show was this kid Greg Dibac and he kind of had this idea where he's like You know, we should talk to strangers

But his original idea was like let's just call random numbers and see if we can talk to people I'm like no one's gonna fucking talk to us more like hi. We're doing a podcast Can we and they're just gonna fucking hang up on us? So I was like we're not doing that so we kind of were like scouring the internet like on Craigslist and looking for Just like these random very specific Fetishes or stories or things people are into that people don't necessarily know about and then we would call them So we did a season and right now we're like in the middle of seasons

We dropped season one and now we're working on season two and I think the most interesting I would say is Recently we just had this woman who It's not gonna come out for a couple months, but it's gonna be in season two this woman is a She she works in she calls it sex surrogacy What is it? It's just basically like she So listen the how we found her is we saw an article on vice and it says I give disabled people orgasms for a living Wow, right, so you're like what?

right, so she works for this company that basically Helps disabled people meet their sexual needs whatever that means if whether it's through education or You know helping them like being there while they're with their partner and like helping them move around or actually Having sex with them, you know, like that's what they do. It's like sex work technically It's just it's like a lot

But it's very it's very interesting because first of all this woman rambled like you would not believe like she went off She excited about talking she was full of information like she takes it very seriously. It's not just like yeah Fucking blow dudes. It was like very scientific and like thought out like she was on top of her shit So like I think that was probably the most Interesting one, I don't know. There's been there's been I can't wait. I am a fan of that show. I love that show I'm a fan of your show. Thank you. I appreciate it. No problem. Yeah, hopefully you come back on one day I don't know about that. Yeah, I'm maybe I get your number after this show because like I said my friend That's sitting outside met you and I said, yeah, bring him on. Why not? He's probably nothing, right?

He's probably nothing Joe, how much money would it cost? How much money this question was just how much money you are pulling in there, Joe How much money, you know, we'll save that question. Um, okay, let's go coffee cake or Ralph's ICs What season Ralph's Isis is only open in the summer. I Know but it depends what time because it's usually coffee cake like throughout the year, but if it's like hot out I'm not gonna eat a fucking coffee cake. I'm not a psycho. I can't tell you the last time I had a coffee cake. You need to grow up and eat a fucking coffee. I could first of all crumb cake

Excuse me The what about the chunk one the one with the chunks of crumb ultimate crumb cake? That's what's great It's fucking incredible, but I would pick Ralph's Isis any day. I do like Ralph's I have a tub of that shit money. No, you don't you ate it all the other day. No, I have I still have Now you're gonna lie on my show. I still have first of all whose house are you talking about? I don't know. I don't live here my studio. This is true. I did this. I brought some I drink all these beers, right? So summer Ralph's rest of the year coffee cake What's that company that makes them

Antiments, oh that makes the crumb cake, but the little I'm talking about the two-pack No, we need that. No, it's like blue and yellow. There's no ultimate twin-pack crumb no dick The fucking the coffee cakes coffee cake and crumb cake are different. I don't really know the difference to be honest with you but softer crumbs We can go with that Believe you I dip it in the coffee you dip hard crumbs and it gets everywhere to the mess I don't drink coffee. I can't do it can't drink coffee. I

Recently stopped drinking coffee recently means today. I So you didn't stop I started just haven't had it today. No, I started drinking green tea today green tea literally tastes like no But I have dirt stomach problems that hurts dirt mixed with water You know what you're mixed with dirt. It's disgusting. It tastes like a lawn like a No, like rain water. It's just passed through on me somebody am I wrong? It's not up. Yes. It's healthy I think I mean, I don't know the science behind it or anything like that good for you Yeah, well up until fucking two days ago

I thought eggs were fine, but apparently if you watch the documentary what the health it's like having five cigarettes or whatever Don't fucking watch that. Are you serious? Divino? Don't watch it. I've been eating two hard boiled eggs in the morning every day Don't do it. No, don't do do that eat your fucking shit Chicken also cigarettes. They compare everything to cigarettes on this fucking doctor. Where's the cigarettes come from who the carcinogens? It's a lie, right? Do you think I know that's a lie? Divino? I don't know if it's a lie It's on Netflix's documentary. It must be true, right? Are you kidding? Which one with hard-boiled eggs is there's nicotine in it? I don't get it. No No, I don't know I have no idea

But I but there's a documentary that people are talking about right now and I watched some of it I got like half hour in I was like I'm fucking done First of all, I felt like I was currently dying while watching it because They literally they talk about carcinogens, which is a fancy word for shit. That's not good for you. I think right? So don't eat exactly. I don't need anything. They're like, okay chicken's bad Coffee cake is probably terrible. They didn't mention it, but I'm assuming there's a couple cigarettes in there. That's crazy They're like if you have an egg a day you're fucked. I'm like, what do you want to do go vegan? I'm just supposed sometimes I have to got a drink green tea and eat a eat a carrot every fucking day

That's it. I don't know. That's all you can eat fruit and vegetables. That's horrible. I'm not doing it I wouldn't I wouldn't watch that show. I'm right on the cigarettes. I'm not doing that Definitely not ready for this one No If I rub my whole body and maple syrup and pancakes, how much would it take for you to eat me? I Come up with that It's all right. Yes with a magic if you rolled around. What do you mean eat you how much would it cost for you?

How many pancakes at least 12? I can't even eat 12 pancakes if it wasn't connected maybe that covers my whole body That covers the important parts You want me to eat a pancake off your dick? Yeah, I don't know if I'm gonna do that Maybe actually may if you're covered in maple syrup and I can take like a plastic fork. I don't want to hurt you And I and I could just jab it off your dick and then eat it For money. Yeah, I'll do that. I'm not like, you know, but I'm not gonna like Not use a fork and just I want you to let straight up like my forehead. Oh I'll do that. I was gonna throw that in for free. Honestly. It's fucking syrup

Literally if you covered human shit in syrup like it has to taste good for at least a site, you know Shitting bacon all taste bad, you know, like if you cover anything in syrup It has to taste good at least for a second. Yeah, and then it'll be like, oh, no, this is shit, but it'll still be a little sweet Yeah, I don't know where that question came from. Here's another money's question How much would it cost for you to suck a dick? Oh, God now we're starting this you just open up can worms. Yep For me, I wouldn't I don't think I could I'll get 500 million dollars It stays here that and then I get upset every day. It's

Right here. He's pointing to his head for those who can't yeah, I'm sorry It stays in my head. Yeah, but whatever you can you'll get over it 500 million dollars. I you don't get over it at that point. You're like how many dicks You know what one is a blessing at that point 500. So you're saying you would do it for 500 million questions out on me God, I'm the captain 500 All right 500 million Easy easy what? I

Agree. All right. That's like what is that gonna do them like what do I just don't like are people gonna be like, dude, you're gay Riches shit like and I'm not gay too. By the way, like I just 500 million sorry Like I'm richer than everybody Most people all your favorite celebrities. I'll just buy their house without them knowing Shit like that You know, that's great. Here's the thing too if you have 500 million Anyone who calls you like anyone who makes funny was like, oh, you're gay or whatever

You can offer them like dude. I'll give you one million dollars to like Jerk off a dude and they'll do it and then you're like that's then you're neutralize the situation You have 499 million dollars. No, oh no offering anybody money I'm just saying that's an option when you have 500 million you can do that you can do a ton of stuff You could pay people to not say that. I don't know. Can you make that like illegal? I don't know. Can you buy a law? Is that possible? That would be sick To just pay money to make a law Here's here's 400 million

No one can say No one can mention that I sucked at dick for five now you have a hundred million. You're not going anywhere What are you talking about? We're talking about a hundred million dollars. What are you gonna do with a hundred million dollars? Divina, I probably won't make a hundred million dollars in my lifetime. I Can't so what do you mean? What am I doing with that? I'm living the rest of my life and giving money to my children Probably not actually I'll probably spend it wait All right That's good 500 million light work

We start getting lower. I don't know what's the lowest you're not fun. No 50 mil We're really flirting with But like what do you mean like to completion or just like like you have like a 15 second finish. Oh like Where on your face? Oh, okay? Back up. Yeah, that's 50 because we're gonna that's 50 mil Yeah house for three. Who is the guy? Can I pick the guy Keanu Reeves? John Wick, oh man in in matrix uniform Keanu in matrix uniform

God that is so bad. How about misty tea after a workout? No shot he trains hard you ever see Rocky's always sweating. Yeah, it's a lot to lots of handle I don't know. I feel like people are learning a lot about me right now. Be honest with you All right, I got another question Going back to the upcoming YouTube. How did it feel when like your first fan approached you for the first time? Oh, I remember this. I want to know cuz I don't know. I was like Super shy. Were you there? You might have been there cuz it was at Rockefeller Center. Nope. You weren't there

Okay, so we went family no when we used to go to Wo-Hop every year in the city and go see the tree it's a Chinese restaurant and We went and for the longest time all my friends are always like even with like my space and like Well, you're Joe from my space and I don't even know why because I wasn't like agent zero I wasn't making YouTube videos. I wasn't like doing anything. You know what I mean?

They're just calling me Joe from my space and I'd be like, do you know who this is like your fuck with me You're Joe from Facebook, bro. Yeah, and then it was Joe from yeah Facebook also I graduated to that and then when I was making the YouTube videos It just became oh, you know who this is like my friend Eric would do that Nonstop for my entire life for no reason. Yeah, and then we were in Rockefeller Center and we were walking by these girls and then Eric goes you guys know Joe said wait. What do you say? He goes, oh my god, is that Joe Senegato and the girl turned around like is it and then and then like knew who I was and like Wanted to take a picture and shit and we were all like what the fuck like this happened just now

Because he's been doing it for like fucking seven years and you know what I mean like as a joke And then it just it happened, but that was the first time. Yeah, I remember that but I remember being like super shy I'm still kind of like that It's I don't know really because I don't it's it's cool when You can just have like a conversation with someone and it's not weird and it's just kind of like Normal, but I don't like when people I Don't I don't know I watch people cry When they met you yeah, like that makes me super uncomfortable because I got there happy

I looked at you and I said yo, I can't believe you could do that to somebody like that's awesome I just don't feel that like I don't feel you make them happy the importance. I Almost feel like they are kind of nuts for crying for me what you do makes them laugh. So no, yeah, this is key Wow You're killing this show. Let me tell you on fire today. This is great Jersey and award right great Jersey We're in a Dennis Rodman Jersey trying to live the life trying doing it I could it'd be better if you had 500 million though. You gotta do suck that dick. Yeah, no reason Yo 500 million Keanu Reeves fucking well, I would tip him three million

What about um? Yokozuna who the fuck is that? Do you know who's that? Why are you staring at me? I have no idea who that is I said his name right right? Yokozuna is this is another person from the Matrix. Oh My god blanked out. Yeah. Yeah, I forgot his name who Who are you talking about a wrestler who wasn't your wrestler who's a wrestler Yoko Yoko Yokozuna, I

Don't know Whatever Yokozuna, I can't believe I blacked out. I'm trying to think of his name What does he look like he's a wrestler black now black fat and and Chinese Like Rikishi, maybe he's not no, it's not Rikishi. He's like yeah, I'm pretty I'm right right now. Am I right? I'm right I don't know. I Believe you excuse me. The answer is no Can't go from Keanu Reeves to whoever the fuck you're talking about Well, we'll follow up with this later. I'll look for the I'll look him up. Okay

Thank you died in 2000 making me look stupid in front of millions of people I said who and you never explained it. He died because you shut off fat That's it. That's what happens. I'm gonna eat a lot of eggs All right before we move on with this disaster, let's get to the Sponsors the first one we have here is zip recruiter. Are you hiring? Do you know where to post your job to find the best candidates post your job in one place isn't enough to find quality? I'm not gonna read this guys. Basically zip recruiter.com. You can post your job to like

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You can get like the subscription thing you get underwear every single month You save time and money with that and if you're not ready for a subscription, that's okay You can still save because me on these is offering you 20% off your first pair Just use our special URL me on these comm slash basement and that's 20% off your first pair once again, that is me on these comm slash basement and Let's move on here What age did you have your first girlfriend? What age did I have my first girlfriend? You know what scratch that first kiss age?

Well, I was like eight. Wow. I was super young dude like Yeah, holy shit. I could tell you about mine. No, but like nothing happened for like yeah I wasn't like I started a and I was just crushing it. You know what I mean? Like I hooked up with this girl Like and I didn't even like enjoy it really I did it cuz I'm like, ooh, this is something Hey, who are you in like listen? I don't know if I was a round I know I was super young because playing it was this girl who lives on my block her name is I'm a setter full fucking name, but this girl used to live on my block. She I

Don't know how this happened, but does she still live on your block. I Don't think so her mom does I want to say her name. Then you don't know who she is. I don't either But yeah, we we we made out underneath the deck in my backyard Did you know how? No shot, where do you guys eight is eight eight eight is eight is very I'm pushing it there It might have been like cool like 10 11 that's fine. I Mean I would a girl in high in junior high school

Maybe like fifth grade. I think it was sixth grade and I ran to the bathroom. That's elementary. Oh fifth grade fifth grade is I was definitely strong wait. How old are you in fifth grade? Like 12 Yeah, right, I think so I feel like you turn so you turn 16 yourself from a year But you're 15 and then you're 14 depending on when you're 13. Yeah, you're like 12. Oh, no 12 8th grade I made out with a girl and I ran to the bathroom. I washed my mouth out with soap more. I was scared I thought I was gonna get like a disease or something really. Yeah

I was scared, bro. You know, it was out staff infection was going around stars So Sars I remember oh to this day Asian people freak me out. Yeah with the mask when they wear a mask I'm like, what do they know? Yeah, like they know something. You know what I mean? Like they like what is going on like? Yeah, they like they watch CNN. I'm not watching it. So like they know something's airborne. Yeah, like I don't like it I don't know. I don't know what's going on. That's hysterical. I'm serious. What do you know? I'm that's exactly how I feel when I see something here like all right

What the fuck's going on here? Like what are you guys Joe when they shake them like shake them down like tell me what is it? Is it the birds remember bird flu? Yeah swine flu. Yo, everyone remember swine flu My high school was the epicenter of swine flu our friends kids and who are seniors in my high school when I was a junior They went to think it was can't cool or some shit and just brought that shit back Hey, man, let's and everyone was getting it. They shut down your school. I remember they did They did I couldn't like school like I got one got it. He was on the news. I might have had it I was so scared. I was like, I'm gonna die like because one dude died from it or something But yeah, but I had a fever

I had like 101 fever and I was like shit like am I I'm done. That's it I had to go to the doctor and the doctor takes this q-tip. That's on a big-ass stick and he jams it in your nose I'm telling you right now. You've never felt pain like this before I believe like because when they jam it like when it's in there It feels weird because like tickles, but once they hit whatever they do hit back there your whole face catches fire It hurts so bad. I really ripped this fucking guy today. Did they did they did you have it? I? Don't remember. I don't think so like I don't think they called and let me know That's crazy, but yeah, I'm still going so They I think they make everything a big deal with like when Ebola came here

It was like a scare for like three months. Oh, no, it's in the city and then now look no one had it I was not Concerned with you know, I was kind of no one in the eye. I didn't want to die, but no no no one in like The general population had it. It was all people that were in direct contact with people who had Ebola in Africa I think it was So I was like everyone's like oh he took an uber and he went bowling and everyone's like I'm not going bowling ever again Fuck ubers and the e-train or whatever it was. It's a Manhattan on the sixth train, which everyone takes so I Don't even know man. That's crazy. Fuck any Bola

Yokozuna, huh? Alright, I was right Good for you. I think this is a good question. That means it's probably you know, we'll save that one for later All right, um Joe I'm gonna ask you a question about like what's your favorite pizza? Oh toss basic as fuck my favorite pizza This is tough Like I don't want to say

Honestly my mom's my mom makes she makes banging pizza I've been telling her for years like she does will open up a shop And you just crank out pies all day and I'll just fucking serve everyone So my other garage I would be the cashier when she makes pizza. It's it's unbelievable. It really is. She makes white She makes pepperoni. She makes plain. I never tried the white I tried the white is fire cuz I don't like white slices At all like a pizzerias, but when she makes them I think the next day when they're cold in the fridge fucking Keith makes pizza now, right?

Keith does not make what Keith makes good taco salad and Dip I can't wait for football season. Hmm We're doing it here at your place. No, yeah, my place Or we're doing it over by you. Yeah, I don't know We'll figure it out. We'll cross that bridge when it comes when it gets there Can't wait. Yeah, Joey this next question is good. Okay. If you were an ask our driver. Oh boy What would your number be? I was really excited about that question really that's not the question I want to ask him before though. You're really excited about what number what number would you choose?

And who would you race for go who would I race for pay me right? Wonderbread Wow Is wonderbread still like doing well cuz I feel like they're not yeah Cuz once this whole whole wheat thing came out everyone's like, oh, no Cuz white bread's literally like poison. I think like wonderbread's fucking terrible for you like you eat it And like you have days before I don't eat white bread. I usually eat. Um, I never eat white bread I always eat whole wheat bread. There's not a difference. The only difference is I feel healthier With the whole wheat shit or multi-grain multi-grain, which I think is whole wheat, right?

with seeds I Guess so I don't know What was the question my favorite pizza was that oh no the NASCAR NASCAR number Can you go three digits or no You'd be the first I would what if I went no number? Oh Or a zero because you called yourself agent zero once once Numerous times. Thank you. So our agent three p.k. I Had a lot of nicknames grown up three agent zero X factor. Yeah, three pk the three point king three point

That was your mice rate that I have yet to lose a three point contest. Yep. All I do is bang threes You used to call you used to make your MySpace name everything that nobody called you Literally everything nobody and no one ever called you these things, but you made it your name somehow That's what I do. You know what I mean? That's what I do. Oh, here we go. Oh god. What's your favorite body part? On myself or like on we'll go yourself and then we'll go on the female Why'd you say it like that my favorite body part on you go I think I mean, I feel like it's got to be dick, right? Although I just like This is a tough question. It's a good friend right there

It is I feel like you you're like you have to say it You know like if you're getting married you have to make your brother your best man Even if like you're better friends with your friend You kind of have to depends varies what like if I'm closer to my best friend than I am my brother like you are I am so well if you got married today, you're not gonna make your brother your best man He's gonna be one of the groomsmen He lives in a different state though. Like I barely see him sweet. He's very busy guy. Like he's living his dream So it's hard. I know I would make my best friend my bet my best man. I

Think I'm gonna go dick I think so like I'm gonna I'm gonna go dick Because I can't really pick out anything else that I'm like I would pick super psyched about You know, I would I think I would agree with you Joe Ooh, can I pick like facial hair because I think without that I'd be nothing Yeah, right some people cannot grow facial hair. I know if I Listen if I'm telling you right now, and I'm pretty confident in this if I shaved my face Right shaved it down. No facial hair

Everything would go to shit. I would look stupid everything would go to shit. It would be bad I could never play for the Yankees is what I'm talking about because they have to shave their faces They do I remember Johnny Damon. Yeah, I had a famous fucking face beard and hair was gone I had I would be like I can't play for this team trade me may he rest in peace He's alive, but Oh God this guy Joey Yes, if you had to pick one professional sport to play for the rest of your life like I just said hey man

You're so funny and your YouTube channel rocks You know what pick whichever sport you want man, and you could just totally play it and we don't give a fuck if you suck Okay Am I actually playing like I'm starting a starter, bro Holy shit with my current body or am I like current status so okay? My ACL is seventy five percent torn seventy five percent or it is I'm thinking about getting the surgery But I don't know if I want to my boy has to get it six months See that's why I don't want to do it, but anyway

So clearly I'm hurting the team right we'd say anything I do Are we doing it for like the money or we doing it like just for love like what we're gonna get paid 10,000 a year Regardless of where I go Not 10,000. Yeah, I'll give you six figures. Okay, so we'll say 125. That's good. We'll go veterans minimum. How about that? Whatever that is in the sport, whatever the veterans minimum is I'll take that. All right, um, that's not bad. I will say Like I want to say football But I know that's where I'm gonna get the most hurt

Yeah Especially with my size and their size I'll probably die But it's the only sport that I feel like you only play 16 weeks You know well like depending on how far you guys go in the playoffs like obviously there's like training and stuff But you get a time off play baseball you play Basketball like that seasons are so long. How hockey? Maybe hockey

You're like a for I would hurt the team. Yeah, I would definitely hurt the team I would also definitely need to get surgery if I'm fucking skating because it's that's pretty impossible to do with an ACL That's torn Yeah, well, and I can't really skate that worse Joe Thornton played the playoffs were to tour the ACL Maybe I wasn't it. I think I yeah, I got that update tour the ACL Jesus Christ or MCL whichever one psycho, but Either hockey or football But probably hockey is good probably probably football honestly tennis Absolutely not

the fuck So it's calling me. Who is it? It's Steven Esposito Not picking that up fucking Is that one of your friends? That is one of my friends. Is he coming over my house? I Don't think so Interesting. Yeah, it is. Are you ready for the next question? I'm very ready. All right, Joey Now I got it. I got a look for one here. What's the most embarrassing moment you ever had in your life? I think mine was today, huh? Yokozuna. Go ahead

Most embarrassing moment um, I Don't know I feel like I Don't really get embarrassed and it's not because anything and nothing embarrassing happens to me It's just that I feel like that's something like you have to get embarrassed I don't I'm not really embarrassed easily Like something crazy would have to happen to me

But even then I'd probably just try to own it as much as possible. I don't know most embarrassing thing I Can only one thing pops into my mind and it's so not like embarrassing. It's just like a stupid thing that happened to me Icy yp playing baseball Oh, are you ran up for the fly ball but ran back that is an embarrassing moment That wasn't what I was talking about, but that was another thing that happened We I was coaching that team and Joe goes yo, I need to play center field. I'm really good So I have a can and I'm going all right Go to center field Joe ball is hit as soon as the balls hit Joey runs full speed forward

I wasn't left. No, I was in center center because it's the captain of the outfield Full speed forward and the ball was right and you just see Joey go shit It turns around runs backwards. You're supposed to step back first step backwards. Yes. I know but This particular time I was playing second And a ball was hit up the first baseline and our first baseman was like this doofy kid and he goes to scoop it And I had like run over there to like just back him up Which you're supposed to do when you play second base So he it rolled off of his shoulder into the air

And I like dove and caught the baseball with my bare hand and then landed on the base and got the kid out And like everyone was cheering which never happens at this place Everyone was like cheering whatever and I was walking back to second base like I was the fucking man And they were throwing the ball around and the kid on third base Thought I was looking and I wasn't through the ball. He'd be right in the fucking face And then I just like I hit the ground and it was like such a high and a low And I remember being like, yo, I just like that just felt like Embarrassing, I guess they're like, you know, you think you're like the man and he's got crushed

There was no time when I was younger. I was playing pitcher and I strike some kid out Uh, I had like the bases loaded and it was like the end of the game And it was like a really poor and I bet and I struck the kid out And the catcher threw the ball back to me and I was I was looking at third and the ball hit me in the face We ended up losing that game because of me and I got the game ball for getting hit in the face So that was embarrassing that I got that game didn't hurt. Did you cry a little bit? I probably cried. I'll fucking I would do that all the time. Keith was the catcher Thomas was the umpire as well

Wow, I see yp. Yeah, Thomas was umphing. Keith was catching. I was pitching Ow Thomas and we lost My fucking brother was the ump Fuck well, he's not gonna cheat. He's not. So why would you even bring that up? He almost would root against me to be honest I love tea gotta love him What else you got here? Where do you see yourself in 10 years? I'm excited about this one

um I have no idea my bell just rang twice So I don't know what the fuck's going on right now. Do you think it's steven esposito? Not really. I don't know what he'd be doing here, honestly uh Let me check my phone and see if he texted me. Nope. He's not coming. Um I don't know I a couple years ago when I first started youtube. I was just like well, I meant

When I first started youtube, I always thought like I'm not gonna do this forever You know what I mean? Like I don't want to do it forever Uh, but it's interesting to see where the world is going because now people are going to youtube and having You know long careers on this thing like making content and Just making money off doing that so I'm not gonna say I'm not gonna do it forever, which I still don't think I am like I think I'll just it was a big hit So why wouldn't you want to do it forever? Yeah, I mean when I first started it wasn't

It was always just a stepping stone to the next thing and now I guess I just gotten kind of comfortable where I'm at doing this stuff so I don't know if I enjoy just like hanging out home and like just waiting certain days to like do your videos and then just Hang out like you have like a great job. Like, you know, you're home. You're clean. You don't hurt yourself Like, you know, like I'm relating yourself to me because like I'm an electrician. Right. So like you're you're you're not a podcast host um No Yeah, like you get to wake up whatever you want. Like it's great. I wake up at 5 a.m

I mean, I try to I'm not like you're productive though. Yeah, I don't want to I don't want to be one of those people's like Oh, yeah, I could just do whatever the fuck I want. So that's what I'm gonna do. Um, do you do a lot of drugs? Uh No, no, I don't do any drugs if you know, I know I'm just kidding Imagine I did a lot of fucking drugs. I wouldn't be here today. I'd be dumb. You wouldn't be friends with me No, I don't like that shit. I kept our friends away from drugs for the longest time Yeah, let me you you act like you're some god

Maybe our friends just have the right minds. Listen I'm not saying you don't But what I am saying come to my show is that when we were younger come on my show When we were younger and there were kids that did do drugs that are like hanging out for us for a little bit You got away We would kind I would kind of try to put it in everyone's ear and hit there here that like you're not fucking hanging out with us because like I didn't I was so paranoid about I we didn't start drinking until like

I was like 16. Yeah, which is like 16 for sure. Oh like that's like old for some people drinking at 14 14 13 like start drinking or whatever like it's crazy. I was in high school. Everyone was partying I did not drink at all like at all until I was like a junior Then I was like Give me a beer. Yeah, then I was like, okay. Yeah, I don't even think our first drinks were beers

I think we went straight to vodka. My first drink ever was New years at Frankie's house. We were stealing Mike's hearts from his mom and I remember feeling so cool Because I would drink whatever I had and then keep the bottle cap and put it in my pocket And then the next morning I was like, look how many I had You know, I was like, this is sick I hate when people do that like count their beers. Dude, what do you want? I'm on nine. I've had nine. I was like, dude I don't fucking care

You're 25 You're still doing this your first time drinking wasn't um, wasn't in Connecticut when I broke my lip open Remember we were playing beer pong for the first time. No, that wasn't the first time I was I was young But like I I drank that time and then didn't drink for a long time. We also drank at Dominic's bird Dominic's birthday. Yes. There was a lot of beer there I don't really remember. I remember hating it Chris was it was Heineken. I still don't like Heineken to this day. Chris was his mom was like, no drinking you guys shouldn't be drinking I think it was like Dom's 18th birthday

Yeah, or 19. I don't know. Was it 19? I don't know No, it was not 19. He was like 18 17 18. Yeah. Yeah, and we had a birthday party because that was the coolest thing in the world Yeah, man. I'm at my birthday party in the backyard. We cleaned that place up. I remember it's crazy I had like Two and a half. I played like three games of beer pong and I had to walk home. I was like, dude, I'm kind of fucking drunk That was fun. That was a good time. I remember that I don't even remember the first time I was like actually drunk though

No, I don't either but like everyone in our neighborhood would when they were like 13 14 they'd like sit in the park at night and just get drunk of like Bacardi Razz Or like um dragon fruit, whatever that shit's called. Malibu sprite, you know something hypnotic was big. Oh hypnotic You know, I've never tried it, but I've seen it like it looks like the neon. Yeah, the blue. It was blue It was in a cool bottle. It looks like a potion. Yeah, it looks like it's good cold It looks like it could Like it's used in I don't even know sci-fi movies like it's very it's like glows. It's weird

It doesn't look safe to drink Have you tried it because I've never tried it. I heard it tastes like blueberries and hugs. I don't think so There's another one of those drinks that is escaping me right now, but Oh, man, fuck. There was some drink that everyone used to drink was like pink You remember it? No, I'm trying to think about that. But hypnotic was big Bacardi was huge for locals. Oh, you tried one. I've never tried one dude. Are you kidding me? I have a heart condition. So I can't I heard it's like caffeine and drugs. They literally I literally saw a uh

An article where they were comparing it like before they got recalled because they are recalled. It was like, okay This is fucking psychotic stuff that you're selling because it's like two two dollars 50 cents You could have one can and just be good for like the entire night Like you're good like don't drink anymore because you'll get fucking right you won't you'll black out and They compared it to a small mountain of cocaine. That was their word. They're wording small mountain of cocaine And I had two of these in one night ones I was on a mission. Was it good though? Does it what is it? No, it's it's fucking horrific Even if you get like I love watermelon flavored shit the watermelon uh

Four loco It tastes like watermelon for like a second and that's just like oh It tastes like straight like someone's pissing in your mouth And you're still drinking. Yeah, I just I shoved it down It was gross though. I hated it and I was black out. I like I was just fucking gone Espo did it. He was a stone did not stand up the whole night just stood there sat there This isn't Connecticut Yo, I'm I'm I'm till this day. I'm scared to drink those things. Don't I mean now

I think they're safe not safe, but I mean, you know Like jungle juice is another one. They're kind of like interchangeable. I feel like yeah But jungle juice is different for everywhere you ghost Pete depending on how people make it Like it could be really good or it could be like I don't know. I'm not into that. I'm not into energy drinks Like I don't want to like red bull and vacas like an upper and a downer at the same time I drink red bull vacas I'm scared. I don't like it. I don't I don't like that like

Alcohol is a depressant and then you have red bulls a stimulant. It's like if you got both that going on You're right. It's not good Your heart's probably like what the fuck's going on here. I have a heart condition. So like I try to like I also get when I get I get nervous. You know when you become conscious of your breathing and you're like I have to do it like you have to manually start breathing for yourself or like your heart You feel like is my heart pounding or is my heart even pounding? I've done that multiple times in my life where I'm like, is my heart even pounding right now? And I'll put my arm on my chest and like find my heartbeat like I'm just I'm like a little bit of a hypochondriac

Than that that's kind of it's kind of psychotic. I know there's a lot of weird things that I do That people don't know about Joe, I'm going to hit you with something hard. I don't know Out of all the podcasts that you have this Mainly the baseman yard Ready for this Who's your favorite guest?

My favorite guest Why are you looking at me is there an answer to that? It's a good question. I don't even remember who's been on the show. Yeah, I don't even know It's hard I just I like talking to anybody honestly I've done podcasts alone. Do you know how fucking psychotic you have to be to do that? Well, you did them on the Soundcloud alone, right? Right

What do you look at you? I don't look at anything I write stuff down like just bullet points of things I want to hit and then I just go And I just fucking just talk to myself. Sometimes I even laugh Like how fucking crazy is that that's a little psychotic if you go back some of the episodes It's like yeah by myself when I just I would just do it like I have no idea why sometimes I would do on purpose like I wouldn't call anyone. I'd be like i'm doing this one by myself. I get like there's some stuff

I want to talk about but you prefer someone else, right? Yeah, I prefer somebody I also feel like I'm funnier when I have something to play off of So maybe you because you're fucking just easy, you know Fuck you Joe, right? I'm the captain now All right, Joe, so I'm gonna pick another one Let me see what I got here in my book of notes Let me say I had a good one. I said I wanted to say for the end. I'm looking for it right now

You know what everyone's waiting to be enough. All right, here we go. This was it Joey Yes, if you had to pick a food to eat every day for the rest of your life Yeah, what would it be? That's a good question. I have a cheap answer here Like you're not gonna get the answer you want but literally whatever my mom makes Phenomenal cook. That's not the question Um, she's a great cook taco salad a plus plus I don't know if I could do that

Like I don't know if I could because I go through phases right now in my sweet potato phase Oh my god, Joey, I went to I went to chicken shack on steinway and got a super-sized sweet potato Listen to me. This thing was like I'm not exaggerating Like a grenade wide and I'm sitting there with Dylan and I'm like, yo, this is fake. This is not organic And I'm peeling it sweet potatoes are enormous You want to talk into the mic or have you done this? How many times you've done this? Listen I've done this show way too much I love sweet potato anything sweet potato. Let me ask you something. Let me ask you something. No get that after the show

Let me ask you something What color of your shit's been? I don't look But they're pretty bad. You don't look. I don't look sometimes. Sorry. We're back to shit. I know they're gonna be upset here Maybe like brownish green. No, no Because when I have sweet potato, I can it's like That color. No never. Yeah When I have sweet potato, it is like reddish not reddish like orangish

It's like, uh, I'm not a fan those babies that people used to buy their kids. They used to shit orange What my cousin Jackie used to have like it was like a baby doll And it was it would take shit and it would take shit in the diaper and it would be orange green you know They sold dolls that took shits This is unbelievable. This is news to me. I never got one of these dolls because you're not a girl But I would have put up my type of sister who didn't get one either I promise the guy he took shit

That's awesome. You had to wipe their ass and everything. I didn't touch the damn thing. I'm just saying What would they shit? What did just come out like it was out of their B like one of those like Air fresheners you plug into the wall like every 30 minutes. It just sprays You had to fill it up with something too so that it could throw up or shit It would throw up and shit It was trying to be buying this they were trying to make little kids realize. Hey, you know Having a kid isn't really a good thing

When you're at fucking four when you're this age, maybe you should breathe pretty short four. They're not thinking about Taking a dick Hope I don't know today's generation. Yeah, you never fucking never know They're all on twitter seeing god knows what kids have cell phones in their eight. You know, they're playing clash clans some crazy Real quick before we wrap up here, excuse me. I was real quick before we wrap up here. Uh, yeah, sorry carry on I was on youtube and I was going through my feed Right because they just have like a feed there and I clicked on this one thing because it said clash clans, right?

It was an entire like live stream Of an event Where there's a crowd it looked like who wants to be a millionaire. You remember the crowd? I was like a circle crowd and then two people in the center and they were just had two iPads And they were like attacking each other's villages and people were in attendance And there was a live stream and a host who was wearing a suit clash of clans How do you make a show? I because you act once and you got to regenerate troops

Like there was like a tournament going on. Am I the only one who's concerned? That's fucking weird. Oh, is it weird? Mr. Pokemon fucking Trainer, I remember that you act like we never played pokemon. I'm I never went to an event like you. Oh, yeah, that's right Was there a crowd? It was first of all. It was yugioh stupid. Oh, all right Next no, it was just a lot of people Okay, might be the last time you're on my show. I'm sorry. I'm sorry about that Do you mind if I plug something real quick? What are you gonna plug? That wasn't the question. Do you mind if I plug something?

What the answer is yes. No, the answer is no. Do you mind if I plug something? No, okay If you guys aren't watching this you can go to fullscreen dot com full scream You heard me go to fullscreen dot com slash basement yard and sign up using the promo code basement You get a free month and it's only six dollars month after that Also on the actual yard Davino's Extra show I'll do this part. Don't worry. Uh, Davino has his show. It's called the extra yard

It's like 15 minute show afterwards, you know, so if you sign up you also get to see that Exclusively on fullscreen only so Definitely check that out sign up What were you saying? um, so before uh, we wrap this up, um, if you don't have fullscreen and um, you know, you kid, uh, I forgot everything he said I can't do it All right, we're gonna wrap this up. Yeah, joey. Where can they find you? Uh, they can go to my twitter at joe santa gato

Yeah, you know That's it my space my space dot com slash Uh slash joe mud. That's actually it mine was i'm dead fucking sexy D. E. D That was mine. Um joey listen, um, well you can reach me at ant vino on everything It was really nice. I had a lot of fun. I'm happy you came here, you know, and um, it's a nice place Thank you. I paid a lot of money for it out of my own pocket I hope I wish success for you. Thank you and I hope you come back

Can't promise that Well, thank you. No problem So that's all for today. See you later, mother fuck