The Basement Yard - Welcome To Sex Factor

Episode Date: May 31, 2016

I'm joined by half of the Veteran's Minimum podcast to talk about a new show called "Sex Factor." Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome back to the basement yard. It is Friday May 20th. Yeah doing it fucking early I usually do it late, but today I'm doing it early, and I'm joined by two of my friends Nick and Tim. Yo, who I actually do the sports podcast veterans minimum with not just any sports podcast the number 86 sports and recreation podcast Right number 86. But yeah the reason why I uh have them Uh on this podcast is because Tim actually brought something to my attention And it's fucking great and everyone needs to hear about it and if they want to watch it they can watch it You know whatever it's up to you

But the shit is called sex factor Right sex factor sex factor which you know it's like a game show for amateur porn stars I don't know how how did you stumble upon this by the way? I was just scrolling through facebook and you know That you stumble upon things. Yes, you do. You see some crazy shit on facebook Yeah, do you remember when facebook used to have the porno like you'd be scrolling and it'd be like a dog a dog and then like some like

Asian weird porn Like thing do you remember that but they cracked down on it. They got rid of it I remember every once in a while you'd get like a just a dick flapping and you'd be like what the fuck is this? I didn't ask for this one today, please. You're like, yo, I just want to see how my high school friends are doing There's a dick waving in my fucking timeline But yeah, so this thing it's it's like a game show, right? So these amateur porn stars people who have never shot porn before they show up to this house and uh There's two

actual porn star judges who judge everything and they have like Fuck-offs. I guess the like there's challenges immunity idols For example, the first one was You had you had three minutes guys versus girl challenge and you'd have to blow a guy He'd come in already, you know hard. Yeah, right blazing ready to go blazing blazing locked cocked and loaded Probably got the puffer backstage and then you guys know what the puffer is Austin powers thing where you stick it over and no, it's there's a person that blows you to keep you hard in between scenes

Right. Yeah, that's the puffer the fuck are you talking about someone's job is to just blow soft dicks wait time the fuck out You're telling me so in porn in the industry, right? Right There's you the person you're having sex with and then there's just a random check who sits in the back like a makeup artist And when you need it like some mascara, she comes over and she blows you you know what I mean? Yeah, like a make-up make a make-up artist for your penis, right, right? That's amazing gotta keep I thought you meant like a Penis pump like awesome powers. What do those do by the way? Don't ask me

So I'm trying to imagine like you put your dick in a pump and then you start pumping I don't even know what like your dick gets thicker. I don't fucking do I was so young when awesome powers came out And I remember seeing that and just scarred my life. I'm like, why would anyone use this? Yeah And then you got older like I understand completely now Yeah So wait hold on so it was it was guys versus girls Oh, yeah guys those girls three minutes three minutes and if you popped You lost if you were the dude, right you didn't you want you won right who won?

Uh, I don't want to give away the first episode. Listen. Listen Can we just establish let's establish something. I think they're all winners in this situation They say that they say that after the all winners Well, I guess that gives it away after the guy gets eliminated. She's like, well, you know, at least she's just got a great blow job She made you come in three minutes. It must have been amazing. Dude. Hold on three minutes is a is a is not a long time That's a very short time. I know So I'm saying like the girl's gotta be I mean these are working. You're supposed to be professional artists of the beige Oh my god

BJ sandwich, hold on real quick, you know before we go any further fastest What was the fastest I need to know I've ever blown No I mean like popped. I mean like, you know, where does this pop to like how like what is it 1980? They use that lingo in the show. I gotta do the line. Yeah, they're like, we gotta pop Yeah, the guy's like english. We gotta pop So like what was the quickest like ever like embarrassed like like usually people when they lose their virginity

It's like, oh, I was like 15 seconds. It was sick. I didn't even come when I lost my virginity So you didn't lose your virginity. Is it sex if you don't? No, I don't think so You didn't come the first time. No, no No, and I find that like an hour First time let me tell you something. It was wait. Why it's it was a sign of things to come. This is my mo man. I don't You don't it takes me a long time. You probably just beat the hell out of it. Then now it doesn't know what to do Only you can do it now you hold the sword I just say no, it just takes me a long time. I can't use I can't even use ultra thin condoms

I have no chance. I use the ultra thin condom. Okay. You're the new Trojan ones. They're like super thin It's like putting cellophane around it cellophane. Yeah, it's crazy cellophane. Like, you know the clear wrap Oh, like like Like reynolds wraps That's the word I was looking for I was gonna say silicone, but that's the wrong fucking thing. But anyway, so on the show uh It's more like the real world actually we're like they're living in a house all together First extended period of time. They're not like on a desert island or anything and they're all just fucking and just it's amazing

I think it's a great idea. I'm gonna watch every episode before we move on Mine my first experience yo I might be giving myself your virginity. Yeah, I might be giving myself too much credit like 90 seconds for real it was bad I think I lost my virginity late. I was I was 19 about to be 20 when I lost my virginity So I think I was so happy about being in there. I didn't even have time to think about like this feels good

I was just like I can't believe I'm having sex right now. That's what that's for me my Everything was tingling And the first time that I got the first time that I got a cock touch without my hands I looked at my hands You're like, yo, what do I do? The nice nice thing that we have going on over here But everyone's had an experience where it's like, yo like Tops a minute. I'm sure there's if it happens often. That's a problem. Yeah, that sucks and unfortunate

But there's been times yo foreplay might get a little crazy. You're foreplayin for like Yeah, hold on. Yeah, I'm a foreplayer. It's happened to me because foreplay it turns into like 87 play and then by the time we do something. I'm like already I'm already there, bro. Can't have that. I don't know. Do you remember your first boner? No, I remember the first time I ever came though It was the first thing you ever jerked off to because I don't mind. Oh my god You don't even want to know wrestling. Yeah me too sable playboy Nice. I was mine was uh, desert heat

Tristratus desert heat that sounds like a war. Yo, who is that? That uh, the wrestler she was a black girl. She had jacklyn jacklyn. Oh jack. Got the whole thing Yeah, when she had the handprints on her on her boobs great girl That was the shit Yeah, jacklyn. It's funny you say her because There was a match once where she was like on someone's shoulders. Yeah Let's go grab her and the whole top came off Pits her out and you know, it was great about her. All the fucking nerds in the crowd went insane

This is how you know, she's a team player too. She didn't even cover it right away. No, she was like, I'm down Hands were just out like what? Oh, and then she put so you got like a good like four mississippi four mississippi's all you need really Especially when you're that young when I was super young it wouldn't even matter like I've said this numerous times There was like in the in my bathroom like sometimes there's like random magazines Just like chilling when you're taking a shit whatever and there was a magazine of like He's talking about like home improvement. Yeah, I'm not talking about like a playable like a tv guy Yeah, yeah, I swear to god like tv guys when they were a thing and I'm not even trying to sound cliche because of stepbrothers

But like good housekeeping my mom has it so like and on any page yo, it could be a woman With a turtleneck on but if I see the curvature of a boob, I'm like there that's it That is a tit and that's all I needed I was like well that is a tit and that's it because yo when you're little you do the weirdest shit does not matter like, you know like I'm gonna die laughing for this but like, you know Yo, just the head motion that you're trying to attempt they can't see this but that's like when you're younger And like you didn't even know about the grip yet like you grip it and just like you're you just kind of like pushed on it Or just like moved it around. No, I just like pressed it up against. I used to use two fingers and like rub the bottom

Yo, you gotta be kidding but like just pressing it up against things like the wall The ground laid down flat on your stomach on the couch. No, I wouldn't but what? I don't wait. What is that weird for me? What'd you do? You flipped it up. You laid down a little you laid down on the couch You like oh side to side. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No, I honestly Like dry humping. What's the weirdest thing? This got weird quick. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No, it's yeah weirder. I used to Here we go. Don't you made a pinching? Yeah, I used to pinch the top What was that gonna do? Like I don't know man, but I did that the first time y'all

Desert heat was on Trish was looking fine. She was pinching your shit Yeah, and then all of a sudden like like some you know something leaked out and then that was it Yeah, like the little uh, little like dog. They call it they call a dog breath or a dog something like that The fuck are you talking about dick? That's what they call it the first time. Yeah, I'm starting to get worried about you The first time you ever come they call it like something but it has a dog in front of it. I can't remember what I'm I know but I still remember a second still remember Trish looking fine as hell First time first time ever came I was playing who he's not my roommate, but I was playing catch with a with a

Baseball my friend nick and we decided Hold on. Hold on. This gets This gets better. Oh, so we decided we're gonna play football. He's like, all right I'm gonna go to my house real quick and I'm gonna get the football. I'm like, all right I'm gonna go inside and uh, guess I'm gonna eat or something. Well, I guess I'm gonna drink and like my computer was on So I'm like, oh, let me look at a picture of a naked wrestler So I look at a picture of a naked wrestler and in the middle of baseball and no, no, he's at his house. Okay, and Back then jerking off before I could come was just like, okay. I'll just rub it for a while

Yeah, and then like I was rubbing it for a while and all of a sudden I was like, whoa, this feels like intense Whoa, this is right. Whoa That little came out and then literally as soon as it came out my doorbell rings I got the football jimmy. Yeah, what'd you do? Give me a second. I'm bleeding Oh my god, I don't remember uh that But you know, I've done a bunch of weird shit like I remember I remember one time in the shower I I more I used shampoo As uh, I had a clean dick that that week. Let me tell you

Listen, you you jerk off with shampoo. You're good for like a month. Your shit just smells like panting forever Oh my god, that's thing Yeah, I mean if you if you get dude if I get air in the tip of my dick, it'll sting That definitely I was taking a risk there So, uh, but I was good. I don't know. I just you know What's the what's the count on in a day? Oh, the most in one day. Yeah So I see I'm not a lot like I tell people like this dudes have asked me this like dude

How much was the most you jerked on one day and I think for me it was like uh four Which is like, you know, most girls would be like what? Because four is like four but like tuss we're like, dude. Yeah, you've had you've been you stayed home sick from school Yeah, cool. Yeah, you know what I mean like dude in a three hour time window in between each one. Yeah But here's the thing But here's the thing. I don't think I could physically go for five. I could do five. I did five

What was there's a five five was my record. What was yours six? And I stayed home from school. We got a four five y'all dude. I it might have been It makes like I didn't even stay home from school Yo, now that you said school I'll get to that right after this but yo, I once I once uh, not once like matt I will cut because like yo, my parents are out the even till this day My parents are out the house until like five o'clock. Yeah, so I would stay home from school and just jerk off sessions Like once every two months. I'll I'll do you one better And with the volume up because no one was coming home

Yo, that's yo, you know, it's crazy about that that you say that I can't even do that guys It's a game changer if I'm home by myself. I still can't have the volume up. I can't do it I get nervous. I'm like, what if the neighbors gave me through the walls? I don't I don't put the volume up at all It kind of freaks me out. Dude, you know what's crazy It does like like you hear the the moans and you're usually home alone when you're jerking off at least I am and then You hear the moans and then they echo and you're like, what was that now? I gotta go in the you get paranoid. I gotta go in the living room with a hard dick and check what was in there What if someone's actually in there? I'm going in there with a hard dick now. Yeah. Yeah. Let's leave it on a reasonable level

Yeah, I hate that I hate that yeah, especially because my roommate's right next to me too. He could hear everything Yeah, he probably knows you beat it all the time. But yo, I've I've I got a girlfriend now. So I have to I've scaled back. Yeah, I wanted that. I am not This this story I'm about to tell you right now. I am not bullshitting you and you can ask Dominic as he was in my class Yo seventh grade Right. There was this kid He would like wear long sleeve shirts and he put like his hands, you know through his shirts where it's like, you know

Like you're so harmless kind of my god. Yo, no joke This kid was sitting in the back of the class and he would jerk off Every single day Every at the same time he would just put his head like in his shirt And he would go ham and then every day he would get up to use the bathroom with a closed fist And like the first couple times like yo, why is this kid always? And then eventually it turned out that that's what was happening and this kid was a savage He did not stop. He was we all knew he was beaten off in the back of class. This kid was doing it. Yo

Shout out to him for having the balls to do that. But that's yo, that's that's out of control in class. Ruthless, man Literally and physically Where's the weirdest place I'm not I'm not a big I'm not a weird guy either. Yeah, I'm not a big weird place. I've never been like at a baseball game Like I got it I'm I'll tell you what the weirdest situation of jerking off of my entire life was I jerked off in the same room as two of my friends one time

Wait, so they were I was yeah, I was a little kid And we had just got the spice channel. Mm-hmm. That was a glorious day We had the analog one and if you kept going 65 65 65 eventually it unscramble and you got it and one day we magically got it So one of us went behind the couch and the other one went behind the other side of the couch This was like a plan thing. We're like, yo, we're we're gonna get boners. We don't want to see them And we all did it. We all were like, did you jerk off? Like, yeah Wait, hold on. I was like 14 time out. So someone went. Yo, you did you guys do that if you knew my friend

If you knew my friend that was there the the one dude like I don't even want to call him out Let's call him s. Yeah He uh He had no shame when it comes to this. He was talking about weird plays to jerk off He he worked at a at a italian meat store And he went in the bathroom and jerked off. This is gonna be gross. I'm just a warning and the guy was like You've been in the bathroom for forever. Get out here. He's like, okay. Okay. One second It's like no out here right now. So he could not wash his hands

It's like go make the breadcrumbs Oh, stop made the breadcrumbs No hand wash mad people just fucking tasted some of his dna They're just the breadcrumbs are a little salty that they a little bit God, that's bad. Yeah, that's bad. Why bad? It wasn't me I promise someone else my friend. It was s but that's hilarious Yo, that's story of you and your friends and then you guys like kind of met in the middle like Now we're done back then we couldn't even like we're so young. We couldn't even jizz. So like yeah

Jerking off ended when you were just tired of it I don't want to do this anymore So you're done. So you can check it like hey, I don't really remember much. I got you with a weird place Oh god, I uh Wait when I said school before you're like, yo, I'll bring I'll come to yeah, I was gonna talk about the kid that jerked off Oh, okay. Okay. Yeah, I think that's a fucking strange that is a strange place No, but yo, I uh, I once jerked off at the mall I was like, you know mad young and shop it with my mom and just went time out

This was like the peak of jerking off like what was like. Oh, yeah, it's the glory days minimum like 15 times a week Damn, so Yeah, like that's gonna be twice a day and one of those days you're like fucking three three. Yeah Yeah, yo went to the mall during she's like i'm gonna go try on some clothes. I was like, ah, yeah, cool With no no magazine is nothing. That's how you know, I was like the thought. Yeah, it's a thought one image of my head. Tristan is Once again, could you guys do that now? like no

In it like no phone just thoughts if I was in the shower I can do it. I can do it in the shower. You beat it in the shower. Yeah, that's just gross because you have a Yo, would you believe me if I told you I never in the shower? Why I've done it Do it like I don't baby oil. I've done it like less than six times so five Now you're never in the shower I'll do I'll do that. I'll do that. We're like i'm taking a dump jerking off Wait time the fuck out. What do you take a shit and jerk jerk it at the same time?

Dude, I want to eat a sandwich while I was taking this shit. Yeah, I know that that's fucking disgusting How do you beat it and take a shit now if you eat a sandwich beat it and shit at the same time now? That's a fucking feat. That's impressive That's shit going on Yeah, that's terrible, that's disgusting. Yeah, man, and then you just yeah, you're disgusting garbage can right there I don't want to be friends with you son. How do you take a shit and and jerk it like those are two separate moods I can't even if I smelled shit my dick would go limp right away. You're chilling you're chilling y'all listen Let me let me tell you something about Trish stratus. Number one all-time draft pick for me. She's my number one

Dream anything she's greek greek. You could take her home to mama. She could wrestle She could put me in any submission she wants She probably kicked the shit out of you. Yeah, good. I love you guys. I've ever been like uh in a submissive situation sexually No, but I've gotten spit on Oh, shit I did a podcast with divino and we talked about that so that some girl asked him to Spit in her mouth. I but this is the funny part so that he tells me that right? He tells the story on the podcast

He says that some girl asked him to spit in his mouth and he's like I didn't know what to do. I didn't I didn't know if she wanted like like, you know When a bully would hold on a nerd and just like do the the long line He's like or she wanted me to like spray spit like a you know what I mean? So he's like I was like so what you want you to do? He's like I did the line And he's like and I did it and she didn't say anything like she didn't say thanks. She didn't say like thumbs up Yeah, she didn't do anything. He's like she didn't say anything. So I don't think she likes it She bit off more than she could chew

That's intense man. Yo, I was spit in your face. I was up in buffalo college right coming back from a party and Hooking up with this girl. She's on top of me and I'm hammered like I'm like passed out You know barely function. It was terrible on my end for sure. I've seen you. I've seen you in that state That's that's the whole all in nothing, bro It's all in nothing when I'm drinking. So this girl's on top of me We're going at it and she spits and hits the right side of my cheek And I swear to you it knocked me sober right away

Wiped it off. I was like, what the fuck she's like, you don't like that. I was like, no That's a lot man. I was like, what is that? Honestly, like that that takes a lot of balls to like not ask someone if you could spit in their face Yeah, I mean it's it's better that it happened to you but like What I'm saying is like if a dude did that to a girl, that's like way worse Like you just spit in a random girl's face. Like that's that's insane. It's insanity I feel like it's more she went out of the she she like was swinging for the fence

And she was signing at the fender like you're not into that. It's like, no You just spit in my face Yeah, that's like sticking a ring finger in your asshole like the first time she meets you It's like dude, you got to like ask about that Nice and yeah, Tim. Why are you giving me that fucking luck buddy ring finger? Yo, you ever been With the ring finger with the ring on her off Yo, you've been you've been uh walked in on

Yeah, which on what on you and on the job Nick walked in on me. I did in Miami I think seem like getting caught jerking it. No, no like he was he like he got with some girl and He was supposed to go back to like her place So it was like three in the morning. I'm like, yo, I'm going back to the room I'm shocked. We had stopped by our room just so I could pick up the condom so you can go That was the plan. So I'm like, yo, no one's gonna be home. Everyone else was out chilling So it's like it's like 315. I walk into the room. I'm like eating something too. I have my head down

I open the door. I take a step in and all I hear is yo, man, get out I'm just like, yo, my bad and Tim is just Fucking hammered at this girl And I close the door and I start laughing my ass off And I just run all the way down Collins Avenue to meet up with your brother and everyone else I'm like, yo, I just walked it on too. It was fucking hysterical And then the next day I felt so bad though after I'm like, yo, my bad. He's like, no, dude, don't even worry about it Oh, yeah, don't worry about it. This shit happens. That's so funny. I don't think that's ever

Happened to me. Has anyone ever called you jerking it? Yeah, my mom God that is like the worst There's no escaping that And I did the weirdest thing too. Like I was so paranoid that she was going to tell someone You admitted to it No that I got I kind of like We're in you chase her down to make sure she wasn't we're in like this

We're in this place. Like it's like a beachfront spot in jersey. Great place and uh Like she she has limited access to the places you go So I just kind of shouted her to make sure that no one was she wasn't talking to no one So you followed her around kind of followed her around and then scalded at her No, I didn't even admit it. We just I just kind of let it rock. I'm like, all right So what happened so you were doing it? She walks in I I'd porn on the tv. I was jerking off in the bed and she just Door open I forgot to lock the door and what happened. It's my fault. She didn't she just acted like she didn't see anything I acted like nothing happened. We moved on

Oh my god, you both walked in we're like, okay, none of this we didn't this is not happening Wait, so she she walked in wait. She just opened the door saw and shut it Yeah, I mean she has every right to open the door if it's not locked. I should have locked it. No, no, no, no Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. So she but she opened the door. Did she take any steps in? Uh, so luckily there's like, uh, there was like a buffer It's the door and then there's this bunk bed And then I was in the bed that's like the bunk bed was In front of the door and then you had to go around the bunk beds to get to my bed

So I was she saw the porn on the television without a doubt though Without a doubt she sold one and it was like the softcore porn That was on like showtime on the man. No penetration. Just a lot of like body rubbing. Yeah It's like a whole bunch of like could be penetration when you're a kid You're like trying to convince yourself that it's penetration. Yeah, this is real like no, no, no, you see this like a dick Yeah, it was so funny when you would see the dick in the softcore porn and you're like, man the dick's right there You couldn't do any tricks With camera not to show the dick like there's clearly a soft dick and that guy's acting like he's putting it in something

Yo, that's gotta be the weirdest job to like fake have sex with someone Like in movies when you do sex scenes, it's gotta be the worst thing ever because they wear like socks and shit over their shit I don't know like Kyle Drogo got to doggie Amelie Clark I would

If I was him, I'd be like, all right, so I'm gonna touch the boob. I'm gonna get some ass In my hand and then I'm gonna go later and uh Yo, you're all about saving memories in the bank and just going home memories in the bank I've never done that. I'm always like a I'm a you know, I live in the moment Tim, you know what I mean when you're jerking off you live in the moment Everything bro. Hold on. So when you jerk off to nothing when you're just looking at your dick in your hand, you know No, I don't I gotta think of something listen. I don't jerk off to nothing because it's 2016. I'm not a fucking sociopath Fucking psycho

At the ceiling just like well, you seen this kid's ipad. He has 20 inch screen on that thing. Yeah, my ipad's huge high def virus free. We're doing a big forget about it My text messages are lined up on that thing and the group chats forget it's on fire Yo, I'm trying to I'm trying to have fun over here by myself the group chat wants to talk about all kinds of shit And I see the messages keep popping up. I'm like fuck all these kids iPad high def and all that. Yo, I never had someone walking in on me jerking it but remember when Frankie was in

in the room over In my closet and apparently I turned into triple h one of my best So listen listen listen to this story. Okay. We were super young. My dog just like flew down the stairs. I think he's dead So so yo crazy. This was like 10 years ago like legit 10 years ago. How old are you like I was 15 15 16 So we were we were mad young right so and he's older than me and Frankie. He's a year older than us So we're like, yo, we knew he was gonna have sex with some girl at his house So we're like, yo, let's Put someone Davino was the one who was in there. Yeah, which is funny because my my listeners know who Davino is

So we took Davino like yo go Into Nick's house and just hot We were all chilling at my crib and then I was like, yo, this girl's coming over at like six o'clock I was like, you gotta go so you gotta leave everyone left Davino went into my mom's room in the closet You know the apartment buildings. It's like the mom My parents room and my room are like literally right next to each other, you know So he went and like laid behind the bed and anyway, I'm chilling with the girl for like 10 15 minutes And you know, she was we knew why she was there. Hold on. Why this is happening

Why was this happening there in the room? Davino's in the closet hiding right and we have him on the phone because we called him and he picked up Just it was like a walkie-talkie and like only one of us had like a cell phone back then I forgot who it was but they were talking to him and he and I have the phone and I remember Davino going like I don't want to do this anymore. I want to get out of here. I want to leave We're like, yo, you gotta stay Another thing my parents are in Greenport like deep the end of Long Island like they're like two hours away So I know for a fact there's no one home

Yeah, so it's and then we're he's like, I don't want to I don't want to do this. I gotta get the fuck out of here So we're like, yo, it's fine. Just stay in there. We're like across the street now We we like left and walked up the block and around and then we just came right back and like sat outside and looked at his house Like we could see anything and uh, we're on the phone with Davino and Davino's like, I need to get the fuck out of here I need to get the fuck out of here and then apparently Davino heard him say Are you ready? So ever since then Frankie's like, you know, apparently this kid turns into triple H when he's about to have sex Are you ready?

But didn't Davino try to like run out in the middle? So what happened was Frankie comes up to my door and I hear keys And the girl's like, oh my god, someone's here. I'm like, yo, there's no way like my parents Like even when they're they're out of the house for work, they never come home like an emergency or nothing They put their hours in they no exception. So anyway, I hear keys. I'm like, yo, what's going on? So I go to the front of my house and all I see is all these morons running up and down chasing each other and then all I hear is This girl starts yelling and I turn back around and I look at the door and

Davino's over there and he does one of those things like you see in a movie where he looks to his left Right looks at me and then sprints out of my house So he's out the house and then like this girl's like old paranoid and shit I'm laughing my asshole because it's Davino and I'm just like y'all the fact that I don't know where he was in the house I find all this out after And then they're running all over the place and then Frankie went into my closet Right, it was Frankie that went into the closet. I don't know. Just like just keep in mind. By the way, this girl We were all friends with it. It wasn't just like

Yeah, like they knew her. Yeah, like we knew like it was funny because we all like we're friends with her But Frankie went back into your closet. He went back in and he was like, yo, I saw this kid's asshole Yo, and there was another time with the same girl We were chilling in her car and she had picked us up from somewhere and dropped us off I like Frankie's crib and Frankie was in the back of the trunk And it was just me and her sitting outside of St. Francis Yeah, and I was just kind of like, you know being flirty with her and they all make fun of me for how I talk They'll be like, damn, you know

I'm like spinning game to her and Frankie's in the trunk and then he goes, yo, that's fucking terrible It just gets out of like, wait, why are you still here? Wait, you heard him in the trunk. I didn't know he was there So I was just trying to play with him like, yo, so what's up? But we're gonna do something, you know, this and that and he's in the trunk and you're back and you're here Those jeeps, you know, so it's not he's not really in the trunk. Oh, he's like in the back back of the car And uh, he's like, y'all that's fucking terrible. Get me out. I was like, yo, you were supposed to be here Yo, that's amazing. I didn't know that story. I gotta say what I'm on beautiful girls. I've ever seen in my life Your eyes are like the stars and shit, you know, this kid took my phone when when I met this girl in Vegas

Oh my god, dude, this is the best story We went to a bar in Vegas called coyote ugly Obviously, it's like a bunch of girls dancing on the bars and shit So we go in there and there's these two women that are just standing there and they were just like they were older They were like 40 something like that and they weren't like the most attractive people but they were like talking to us or like whatever we were just having fun and um Him and someone else Frankie were talking to them and just whatever and We left and they stayed with them

So we left and then later that night and it comes back to the room. It was me and him in the room And um, I'm like, yo, whatever happened to those girls. It's like, oh, they left Like we were supposed to meet up with them or something like that. Yeah, but they lived they lived deep So like imagine like from here to like lyc is where their hotel was It was far. So you're talking about like a two mile walk. You know, I mean, so we're like, yo, fuck it So I was like, can I have your phone and I'll text her and if they want to meet up we'll meet up with them And he's like, all right, so I take his phone. I'm like, hey, what's up? No answer. I'm like, what are you doing right now? No answer. It's like four in the morning. Yeah four in the morning. Could it might have been five. Yeah

And I was like, you guys want to go to a club? No answer So then like 20 minutes goes by no answer and then I just write back I think I love you I was like, yo, I hope we see them tomorrow. Yo, I knocked out immediately. So the next morning I was like, yo, it's my phone. He's like here and then I looked at it I was just laughing my ass. I just said, I think I love you Yeah, man God damn, let's wrap this up because it's a lot of jerk off stories a lot of jerk off stories

A lot of dicks. Do you guys have anything you want to plug? I was going to and then it got gross. So I'm just gonna stay out of that Now we'll plug we'll plug the the podcast Yeah, you guys minimum. I know Joey doesn't enough but headed over to a veterans minimum It's the sports podcast that we run. It's a lot of fun. We do even we even throw in some jerking off bars there too We do it all we talk. Yeah, it's mostly about sports with Some of this shit thrown in there, but it's like it's like high school sports with a sprinkle in some jerking off. There you go Yeah, and that's all and uh, thanks for listening you motherfuckers