The Basement Yard - We're Washed Up

Episode Date: March 14, 2017

On this episode, @LambVM10 comes on to talk about how we're washed up when it comes to drinking. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome back to the basement yard. It's Monday fucking March 13th. I was Said may yeah, it has been a long day I had a bunch of people in My apartment today. There was like a photo shoot that went on Because I'm doing the pet the basement yard is becoming a show I don't know if I even talked about this on on my parking. I don't think you have I don't even know if I'm allowed to but I'm gonna do it anyway because fuck everything the basement yard is becoming video

It's gonna be available on this platform I'm actually like really excited about it at first when it when I first when they brought the idea to me I was like, yeah, cool. Whatever. I'm not gonna like change anything about the show, which I'm not anyway But it's just like it's mad cool. Like they're gonna make this room that we're doing it in look like a dope. I Guess like a dive bar sort of there's gonna be a lot of drinking I know that a lot of funky shit being put in a lot of funky shit a lot of funky shit and Yeah, so they were there. They were here today There was like 10 people in my apartment and thank God

I moved into this new place because the last apartment that I have is so it was tiny and if they all came in that would have been chaos The living room was the kitchen and the hallway at the same time So like that just gives you an idea of how small that place was. Yo, if all photo shoots are like that I wouldn't never guess that's how many people it took to put some shit like that together I know it was like a lot of a lot of people you got the people who got a setup Strike the set and then the photographer and then they have an assistant and there's some dude who just stands behind and fucking Just stairs and I don't like photo shoots either because it's awkward like you just got to stand there and they're just Pose are you doing a great job? And it's weird. I don't like it. I was pretty sick though watching you do that

It was like thanks dad Like a proud father. Yeah, no man. That was awesome though. No, it was cool, but I don't know man I don't I just don't like posing or just like I Don't know. It's just a weird feeling You were pretty happy when like they started leaving. Yeah, I was like I told them to because I came out like they were shooting in this room first and then We were in the living room and then I walked back out there and there was like a couple other people over there They also brought mad food too. Oh, yeah, that's a mess. Yeah, it was like an actual set like they had

The craft services, they had sandwiches a big-ass salad that no one touched Now you don't do that. They had wraps. They had a chicken and steak and all that and I got to go to that first I'm Nick by the way guys. Oh, yeah, I didn't do that Just skipped over that part fuck it long day like yeah, I know what time is it right now It's fucking 10 o'clock people are probably like where the fuck is a goddamn podcast. I Fucked up, but um Yeah, it was weird But it but it was fun

The photographer was hilarious. It was like this woman and she was just like tell me about sports Try and she like she was trying to get me to talk. I guess they get some like Candid shots. She's like talk to me about sports. Tell me a good joke. Tell me you want to hear a joke that I have I have a joke and then she was like I was like the fuck is going on. What do you think of the trade? How was the trade? Yeah, good The whole time I was like lady relax. Just tell me what you need. I got you And she was trying to prompt me on everything, but Whatever, but the show is show. I'm really excited about it's gonna be dope

You guys can watch Davino be really fucking awkward in front of a camera It's gonna be a hilarious. There's also gonna be like a extra Little show afterwards too, which will be drinking for sure Um Yeah, I'm actually really excited for that because now that I have like I see how many people It takes to like run the show like, you know, it can be good because usually I just shoot the shit What a tripod and do it myself and try to edit it and make it look cool But for the first time like ever

My production value and everything is gonna be legit. It's not gonna be like me in the basement with the bed sheet Because as yo, you remember that yeah, dude back in the day. That was when I first started it I was like I shot my first video Like with me against one of the walls of my basement, but I was like stacking fucking now I remember even more used to hang it up like in the back. Yeah Legit a bed sheet. It was that's a bed sheet, but like what how it first started was I Stacked I had bins of like where you put clothes in and I would just stack those and then books And I put this camcorder on top of all that so there was like kind of eye level with me

And then film against the wall and I hated the background so I was like, let me just get a solid background So I took a thumbtacks and I would every week I would thumbtack a bed sheet into the ceiling and if you go into my basement There's holes in the other's fucking holes everywhere in the in the in the ceiling and it would be you could tell it's a bed sheet Like it doesn't look good, you know what that reminds me of remember we're throw parties at well They listen to this but I throw parties and my grandma's house over the summer Oh, we will put the bed sheets with the with the The hangers the clothes pins hangers look at you hangers fucking mad greek long day, man

But yeah, we will put them up because she had no blinds in the house. Yeah We're like, yeah, we can't have people walk by and see a party. Yeah, so we would just hang those up there You know those parties you remember all right let's just I don't know if we ever talked about these But like there was one point Where me and Nick were like, yo, let's throw a crazy party Let's get a tarp and put it in the living room and then blow up pool and fill it up with like three inches of water Yeah, not our best idea for sure and we were so down and we told our friends We were super excited so I'm like, you know, you know, we're gonna do we're gonna make it like a pool party

In the house, they're like, yo, are you fucking dumb? This is also like fresh off project X where everyone thought that they would throw a project X party Yeah, and we did we had we had like a good we had a good party before that and it was successful No one got in trouble. We fixed the house. It was cool. And then we were like, all right Crank it up a notch like now we're gonna pool But and this is a house that has no TV. Yeah, no electricity. It's like it's hot as fucking there You just sweat your ass off. It was good times. Good fucking times shout out to Sparta the nickname of the place

Yo, what a disaster that was I can't believe you did that Anyway Sponsors today. What do we got? We're doing them early stamps.com. Oh God, here we go These days you can give practically everything on demand like our podcast Listen whenever you want when it's convenient for you So why are you still going to the post office and dealing with their limited hours when you can get postage on-demand with stamps.com? Listen, I just read that and I know like some in turn wrote it

But it's actually like really true. It doesn't make any fucking sense why you would go to the post office If you just need some fucking stamps or like you need print labels or some shit Anything you can do at the post office you can now do right from your desk with stamps.com Buy and print official US postage for any letter or package Using your own computer and printer and unlike the post office Stamps.com never closes Yeah, yeah, whatever What is this? Oh, yeah, it says talk about how you use stamps.com was about to read that

Talk about have you but I actually have you stamps.com. It's how I used to send The merch out which I haven't updated in a while. I know some people have been asking for it I gotta be honest. It's gonna take a while Got a lot of shit that I'm doing right now, but Yeah, if you want to use stamps.com right now use my name Basement for this special offer four-week trial includes postage and a digital scale. Ooh Or you could weigh your drugs on that if you need to don't wait Go to stamps.com before you do anything else click on the radio microphone at the top of the homepage and type in basement

That's stamps.com enter basement stamps.com Never go to the post office Again, that's a weird slogan. Yeah, the post office sucks. Yo, are they like there's always Some old-ass person there with way too many packages Mailing you're old. You know, who are you sending shit to it's the worst dude besides the letter like like it was I got a card for my birthday from my aunt and uncle. I was like, why did they send this? Why is a card exactly like dude? I'm sure you if you saw me you'd say happy birthday like whatever, but you you live in New Jersey

You sent me a card. There's no money in it or anything, right? It just says in script that I could barely read because my aunt has like an elf's handwriting It's fucking all over the place and Swirling and shit and she said dear Joey and then whatever the card says happy birthday. Enjoy your day. Love aunt Sonia and uncle Tom Why are you sending me that? What am I gonna do with it? Dude the post office is terrible I had to wait for about an hour and a half when I was trying to get my passport when we went to Toronto Yeah, how we were all running around to get it like expedited. Oh my god. Yo, there was one lady there for about

No exaggeration 40 minutes. I need to send this express. I need this could take you know standard This needs to be overnight It got to get weighed it got it. It's the worst dude I've never actually like went to the post office to mail anything ever not me either I don't think I've ever mailed anything. I just give it to my mom Yeah, just take it actually now. That's a lot of college credits and all that and transcripts. Oh, you had to send all those out I just put it in a mailbox or I go to the other guy. He charges ten dollars everything It doesn't matter if you're sending a feather. You just tend up ten bucks. My god. Yeah, whatever. Thank you

Fucking money, whatever. It's fine What else we doing here? Uh MVMT watches All right, here we go Where is this? I can't read it was founded on the belief that styles shouldn't break the bank the watch Makers goals to change the way consumers think about fashion by offering high quality minimalist products at revolutionary prices That's a fancy sentence there with over one million watches sold to customers in 160 countries

Wow around the world MVMT watches has solidified itself as the world's fastest growing watch company Hello, actually got a watch from them because when you do these things they send you free shit, which is awesome. Must be nice It is very nice the watches aren't in that expensive like I think the watch that I picked was like 120 bucks or something like that, but it's like a black on black shit was fire. I Still got it. I think it's here or I might lift up my mom's house But whatever the company was started by two broke college kids that wanted to wear stylish watches But couldn't afford them. So they started their own cup watch company. What?

They're like, yeah, I really want to wear watches, but they're mad expensive Let's just like make our own watches and start a fire. That is kind of fire, but I feel like that's like I Mean, I'm sure more went into that. They made it seem like this was like on a whim. They were just kind of like I kind of want to watch. Let's just start a company and just fucking did it. But anyway Yeah, you know, I'm all about that to broke college kids Starting a company movement watches Start at $95 at a department store. You're looking at 400 to 500 bucks, which what are you doing? Why are you buying a watch for that much?

What is that? Who's buying watches for $500 even if you have a billion dollars like what's the point? They all look the same unless you get three inches from it What's the point? Yeah from afar unless you have a g-shock like I do Fucking g-shock. Oh my god Yo, I bet you were one of those kids who had like five different People would get the g-shock to match their sneakers or their outfit. Yeah, I have about like five or six. Yeah, you discussed me honestly Ah

Whatever man, here we go get 15% off today with free shipping and free returns by going to MVMT watches comm slash Basement this watch has a really clean design. Seriously. I've been getting compliments ever since I put it on I think I wasn't supposed to read that like that. Now it's time to step up your watch game Go to MVMT watches comm slash basement join the movement Is it a movement though? Very interesting Gotta check it out. What do we like that's expensive, but we can we should start a company Hookers, they're not expensive. Are they?

Some cheap ones. Yeah, I mean, they're not safe. Yeah, dude. There was one time I'm not I'm not stay away from so I've never I've never been to a strip club in my entire life And there was one night. I was out. All right, so this is gonna sound way cooler than it actually is I Promise the I don't know if you even know this. I went out in the lower east side ready with two models Okay, but it sounds way cooler than it actually is so we went out to to hair the dog Nice gray bar gray bar, and we were drinking whatever and then they were like we should guys check We should guys check her

So I was like alright whatever at that point I was like kind of drunk and I'm not like a huge strip club dude I'm not like oh titties dude. Let's go get it But I was like cool So we went to Times Square, which I don't know why and then we just kind of walked around and she's like Oh, I know the guy who runs this strip club, and I'm like alright cool. Whatever. I you know Discounts. I'm in yeah, exactly the less I have to pay the better so we we were standing outside and And She's like oh, he's coming, and I'm like oh god this is disaster whenever like someone's like oh, I know this guy

And then he's like oh yeah, he's coming saying oh god this guy shows up sure enough the guy shows up He's 411. He's a tiny little Spanish slash Asian looking dude, and I'm like alright, and he takes our coats don't know where that went I think I might have left it there honestly. I had a sweater on So he takes our coats so we go upstairs this strip club was awful It first of all there wasn't a lot of oxygen like it wasn't like a casino where they pump oxygen. It was just kind of like Like must must eat dude all could all strip clothes are like that It was sticky. It was like a humid summer night in there

It was a winter. Those are all New York strip clubs It was bad dude and next door was like a Chinese shop like it was like in the middle of the block You would have never known it was strip club when you walked by that's a mistake right there Like I don't even know if it had like a cool name like starlets or scandals or a crazy horse. Yeah It was kind of just like Stan Lee's Stan Lee's you know whatever strip club. Yeah, and I'm pretty sure the guy was wearing a cheetah print Jacket which I was like this makes yeah now you connect the dots you want to strip club I know this because it's your jack cheetah prints a good indicator of right strip club and

You know I need I didn't get a dance either Like I just sat down and the girl one of the girls got a dance from a girl who like I Wouldn't want to get a dance from and it was some girl on stage who was dancing, but she had no enthusiasm She was kind of like I just she was going through the motions No one was excited to be there. The dudes are like, I don't know how I got here take take three dollars But it was weird. I didn't get a drink either. I was too afraid like if how much it costs I mean it's time square. You're in a strip club. You get a jack and coke. You're looking at 50 to 60 bucks That's that's the mistake Frank you made at

When we went in Vegas. Oh, yeah, Vegas got a drink. It was like $60. He's like, wait, excuse me I don't want a bottle. I just want to drink. She's like, no, no. Yeah, if you want to look at the bottle, it's 20 bucks Yeah, that's ridiculous, but how the fuck did we get to strip clubs? I don't even know how we did that because they're a good time The I don't know Your birthday just passed. Oh, yeah, you turn 40 26 26, yes, 26 years old We didn't go to a strip club I feel like we should do that one night like I want to start going to more comedy clubs because I think that's fun and

Also, just like random nights go to a strip club But like not because you want to see tits because you want to see like the story is good, too Yeah, just like you see a lot of shit in them. You're like, what is going like it's just You know that the bus I want to see a stripper like Put her fucking asshole on some dude's forehead or something Well, when we were in Vegas Ahmed who's been on here several times this one stripper put like her her ankle behind her ear You would have thought like Ahmed saw the Holy Spirit He was blown away and I was just like dude, so the Holy Spirit. I was like, yo pick your draw

This is her job. This is what she's supposed to do. Yeah, it was supposed to stretch She's supposed to know how to do yoga Which by the way is the hardest fucking thing I've ever done in my life Don't ask how this happened, but there was one night, but that we were mad bored. No one's doing everything I bet it was at my house. I put Apple TV on my television. I fucking put on yoga. It was some lady. She's like Just stand and do dude, they just stand and somehow you just sweat. Yo, it's a killer workout yoga for sure I always say that I want to start doing it like once a week don't have the time for it

but even just like I'm a fan of stretching and No, I'm gonna get a big fan of stretching big stretch guy God, I love this touch your toes. Yeah a little bit of this now, but yeah, yoga's Oh, yeah, Nick, but yo, the stretch guy the the birthday thing the best part was we both text each other the next morning Oh, God, it's like we both didn't want to embarrass ourselves yet by saying like how little it took to get us drunk Yeah, but I was like dude. I probably had Six or seven drinks no shots no mixing. Yeah pretty much beers and I had an Irish car bomb Yeah, and I was just I I left my birthday early. I was like dude. I'm going back to your old place

Which is my apartment now. Yeah, I've been sleeping there. So I was like dude. I'm out That was it and then the next morning was when I texted. I was like, yo, this is crazy Yeah, I mean we went to a bar and we got we split a picture of Blue moon. Yeah, like a little more than the average beer I guess we had we had two beers at your house. Yeah, and then we took the cabs over to the bar Yeah, and then we had we had like a picture there and then we left one to another bar and then we did some karaoke and shit But I was like hammer like I don't even know how I was like Yeah, I do I have a headache or am I drunk like I was confused now how usually never I can't get drunk off beer

But I was drunk Yo, so what is it? Is it is it us becoming adults? No, I'm like mature or is it because I'm becoming a Bitch is I think that's what it is. So but here's the thing though when we go on vacations We're getting tanked like we're drinking all day all night. I know that's a lot of peer pressure No, do you think do you think it's the vibe? You're like, yeah, I'm on vacation I'm gonna just let loose and just yeah, I don't know what I'm on vacation. I start drinking like when I get drunk I just start thinking about survival I'm just like, oh fuck and like I don't know see I drink beer

90% of the time well not so much anymore like I've been drinking a lot of bourbon and shit, but Usually from for the majority of my life 9% of the time. I'll be drinking beer. So when I do switch to liquor Vegas, yeah, Miami and shit when we're there We I drink liquor and then I drink it like it's beer. So I don't like I drink it too fast Yeah, and it comes to a point where I'm like fuck. Yo, I'm blackout. I love beer If it wasn't for beer being the worst thing that you could drink I'd drink that all the time No, yeah, I know that's the thing with me I feel like I don't drink as much as I did in the past because I'm like taking working out serious

Yeah, I'll be coming a fat piece of shit. Yeah, you know like I was fat piece of shit. Yeah, you were a big boy Now I'm just a piece of shit, right? Yeah, so it's like it does so much damage where you're hammered. It's 3 a.m. You're pregnant or shit and then and then what happens or your boys are like, yo, let's go to the diner Let's go eat you get a bacon cheeseburger deluxe with french fries. You take that down and then in five minutes You're asleep. That's like four days worth of calories It in what four hours and then you just pissed away your entire workout and you gain three pounds. Yo, it's terrible Dude, and when I get hiccups, that's the thing that ruins me more than anything If I get hiccups if I drink like 10 beers

I'm getting hiccups and I don't get them for like 10 minutes. I get them for like a 45 minutes minimum. I had hiccups one time. We were on dipmars. I walked all the way to my house I was laying in bed with hiccups. I thought I was gonna die. That's like what like I'm not like a half mile walk You say it's far. Yeah, and I was fucking like holding my breath. I was upside down and shit It was walking on my hands. Yeah, I remember one time It was actually when we woke up from one of the parties the sparta parties We were talking about before and we were cleaning up and you you you had hiccups for about 40 minutes And at one point I was like, you know, he's like my bad, you know, I couldn't I don't know what to do

Dude, I don't know. I like my body when I get hiccups they last for so long. That's why when I hiccup once I'm like so scared And sometimes you get you ever to hiccup but like twice you're like like a back-to-back. Oh my god, you know that hurts so much I'm like This is your fucking diaphragm feels like it's gonna explode and yo Going back to what we were talking about like how we can't drink anymore How how long ago was it where we were like this is another story We're gonna sound way cooler than we really are. Yeah, but we were crushing when we were going up to Connecticut

And even Highlands we go up to Highlands with the Petrops. Yeah, we would bring like a rack each a rat Yeah, 30 36 beers and we take those down in a day or two days. Yeah, something like that And in Connecticut, they don't serve alcohol on Sundays So there was a lot of times where we'd wake up not not even yeah, we'd wake up Sunday morning Like on a long weekend. So we'd be there for Sunday night Also, it'd be like yeah, we have no more beer and everyone's like dude. You guys had three cases You know amongst like three of us who me you and Espo would bring up the beers I remember the one time where it was more Memorial Day weekend and everyone brought

a case I think of Natty Lights, which is like water with a hint of beer, but with all the calories and That's we made a pyramid and it was like over 150 beers or something and then We were got there on Friday and they don't sell women. They do now. I think in Connecticut They were but at the time it was like you couldn't buy beer at all at any time on Sunday. So By the time Saturday came Saturday night, we were all like worried like yo, we're not gonna last like running out I was like crushing 20 beers in a night because that was when we were we were like 1819 and and that's bad But we're like 1819 and and we just found out about shotgunning beers and like oh, dude. This is sick and

So I was like That was when so I didn't know about it and we came back from the bowling alley one one night and I was on my patio And Johnny Petrop actually was like yo you want to shotgun beers? I'm like the fuck is that and he showed me and I did and I was like So when we got to Connecticut that summer I was like telling everyone about it I'm like yo, I switch God Do you take your key and just fucking pop this open and you got called so many different names if you Yeah, stop being a bitch you end up shotgunning like five beers in an hour

Yeah, I remember and then the twins were up there and I was like yo you guys want to shotgun beers This is how you do it like I felt like I was like a fucking teacher and shit over there Jam and keys what about when the one beer distributor told us that if you fill up a gallon Like a milk gallon with the tops of cans get a free keg. We're like, yo, we're gonna do that Yo, we must have drank honestly like in in one summer thousands of beers and it wasn't even close Not even I wasn't even halfway not even halfway Like that's an that's an insane amount. Why would that even equal? I don't even know why that even equals a keg, but

It's a disaster and remember one year for the Super Bowl. We got a half keg thought we finished it didn't got another keg Well, definitely didn't finish that. Well, here's the thing We asked Ralph to go check on the keg. Yeah, and he nudged it. He's like, oh, it's like yeah Yeah, that mind you this kid's fucking 18 pounds. So he probably couldn't move it if it was empty But he said it was fucking he said it was empty so we got another one and then I left those two I still have them in my garage. You know that yo yo you had them for a while This was the first time that you had those I've had them for three years Maybe three years four years, maybe my mom yells at me. Well, she doesn't anymore until you did your backyard

They were out there. They were in the same spot. Yeah I moved them the next day Because it was like cups and shit all over the floor, but I put them against the fence They sat there for four years. Don't you get you get you get your money back It was like 130 bucks and you get like 80 when you bring it back. I never fronted I still have a tap too like I just have I have everything you need. Yo, what's that? What's the drunkest you've ever been? Well, let's go with beer off beer cuz I know I have no idea we mentioned last time I was on I think we mentioned the

The fourth of July. No Vegas how drunk you got that's the job. I think I've ever seen you No, I don't know because I didn't throw up that was I was pretty fucking bad at Vegas, but extra ketchup Just a case just a case. Yeah, dude, the best was I Don't know if I said this on the last podcast with the best part of that whole thing is I don't know who he's on the phone with he called like the kitchen, maybe Then he gives you gives me the phone to say what I'm ordering and I'm like, yeah And he's like laughing and I'm laughing and He goes he goes, you know tell the guy that we're not gay

So funny oh man, and then I was getting into it like about how it's weird that Money is paper and how one piece of paper is worth 20 20 papers Yeah, you know, I'm real philosophical when I'm drunk, but when I was really drunk. I was probably like 18 19 this was like that was the summer where we were into Connecticut we crush all those beers Not like our prime drinking summer. Yeah Illegally, so remember we had like the starting five like the five people that drink Oh, so it's like me you Espo Josh and David. Yeah, that was like our starting five. Yeah, but um That's summer we drank a bunch of beers and then at the end of the summer

This kid Pete was going away to Greece so we had a like a going away party in his backyard and There was no there was beer, but he had pinnacle vodka, but it was cotton candy flavor. Yeah trash by the way No, I mean it's like super sweet. Yeah, it is but when you like I had some beers in me So I was like, you know good. I mean it does go down smoother. So it doesn't like yeah Yeah, if you have like a good buzz and you drink that shit like you feel kind of like it's kind of like fireball Wouldn't you say fireballs? Yeah, I mean fireballs like fucking syrup Drink that shit. I haven't had fireball in so long. Actually, someone made me take one

I think I was out of at a break and someone came up to me like oh, I got you a shot your videos are hilarious And it was fireballs like fuck yo the first time we went to Miami was the first time we heard about fireball down What was that other shit that Colombian shit? Oh Disgusting I got yentay. Oh Identity yo those girls brought it and they're like you got to try this. I'm like, what is this shit? I I smell it. I'm like y'all is disgusting. The fuck is y'all? It smelled terrible. Yeah, it was like rubbing alcohol It literally smells like that. She goes. Yeah, I'll go ahead. She's like drinking out of the bottle. My yo, you're fucking out of your mind Like you're crazy

But yeah, they made a strength that but I haven't had fireball in like a long time There was that one summer where we would the first time we went to Miami We came back and then I felt like everyone in our neighborhood after started drinking that like we were putting everybody on because That was the first time we heard about it down there No, the first time because I told you I told you guys to bite in the store because I went to the store and bought it because right before we left I went to Rockies, which is our local like dive bar and The bartender was like you want to do a shot Like just on the house whatever were her and I was like, yeah, fuck it and she goes

Let's do fireball. I was like that. I thought she meant like People like Fucking doing that. That's the first thing I thought of when I first heard. Yeah, she's like you want to do a fireball I was like fucking no I want to live and not pour this thing and like my clothes on fire and she's like no, it's a it's a Cinnamon whiskey and I was like, all right. I smelled it smells like whatever and I took a shot of it And I was like, wow the greatest thing ever because usually like at that point I mean, I was still underage at this point

But up until that point you're drinking Bacardi and like Svetka and like George Yeah, George $9 handle. Yeah, that's so disgusting. That's shit. It's literally like I'd rather drink a dick if that's possible That stuff is disgusting, but Yeah, then she she so up until that point you drink like the shittiest Stuff and like I hate vodka like how do you take shots of vodka? It's just gross, but then that was like And then I had Jack Daniels too, which is like kind of rough going down. I guess yo jack Daniels I could take like I haven't drank nothing all day if I was to take a shot of that right now

I'd throw up. I can't do jack. I'm like that with it's my only request anytime you guys are like, yo What are we drinking? I'm like anything but jack. I'm like that with a Jaeger Jaeger I could like I just don't know what it is. Jaeger. You got to be like 18 to Like 20 to drink it. I hate when you get any older. You can't you can't fuck with you Trash, I hate you. It's disgusting But yeah, man, that was but anyway going back to what I was saying before I was at that party and I had Uh pinnacle cotton candy vodka and I was just ripping shots of it because it was delicious

I was like, oh man, it literally tastes like you melted a stick of cotton candy into this cup And I was just like drinking that and then I remember tim actually tim Um, we never really hung out with but we know from the neighborhood and I was sitting On the side of Pete's house like on these steps And I was just sitting there with my head in my hands and I'm like, holy fuck. How am I getting home? because like I was pretty far and I had to walk home and He walks by me. He goes, what's up, Joe? And I just lifted my head up and he goes. Oh my god He's like, oh my god. And then later on he told me like days later. He's like, yo when I I looked into your eyes

there was no one in there like that was scary to see and uh actually, I think espo Who had just gotten to the party? He only had like one beer. He's he saw me and he's like, dude I have to drive you home. Like you're not walking home. So he like drove me home and when I got home I was sitting on my toilet and I threw up in a tub But I threw up like Dark brown like I could have it could have been blood I don't know. It looked like shit. Can you tell me he came in because he was still at the party and I left early

Can you tell me he came in and he thought I shitting Just left it there He was just shitting in a tub. That's a whole new level of drunk Yo, I gotta say you're one of the better people to be drunk around for the reason that Anytime you're drunk, you're not like one of those people that like, yo, I'm not hammered like I'm I'm fine No, when you're when you get fucked up, you're like, yo, I need help I'm very responsible like I'll be having fun and immediately My body will feel drunk and I'll turn to one of my friends and I'm like, you know, I'm not okay. I need help

Yeah Which is good because then you have everyone like a lot of people they'll be like, oh, no, I'm fine. Yo Not a lightweight or you know, I'm not like that. I was like, yo, I want to I go into survival mode especially like unless I'm home like there's times where you know like on Christmas or Thanksgiving like we'll go to my aunt's or uncle's house and then we'll come back to my house and my whole family We'll just sit at the table and just like take shots of Jameson and like dance and shit in our living room And when I'm home like whatever, I'll just rip. I mean you're home. That's like, yeah

I know that's where you got it. Yeah, but like when I'm out. I'm like, yo, I'll die here No one cares about me here. Like I need to go I remember and there was there was another night where um Yo, this is such a weird thing, but I was out at sweet spot and I was with dominic and We were drinking jack and coax and then chasing them I'm not like chasing them, but like We would take a shot of fireball and then drink a jack and coke and then take a shot of fireball and then drink a jack and coke

You know, so we had like four so we had four drinks four shots. I was messed up and I forgot how I got home But I got home and I was just throwing up like this is one of the other times that I threw up from drinking And I was just throwing up into the sink and then Keith comes and he's trying to like help me or whatever and he gives me a Um Mouthwash and I just drank it I was like, thanks, and I just fucking shook it

It was disgusting But I remember before that dominic has a video of me And he's videotaping me and I said something this was right around the time that nelson mandela died And I said something like nelson mandela died and now i'm now i'm next up I don't know what the fuck that even means drunk talk. Yeah, I don't know And then I was going to this whole thing like yo, I love my friends and he goes. Yeah, let's go And he had it like so close to my face Yeah, well drunk me if you have videos of me my eyes are like dead

My eyes are just like you just you just pick up your head and yeah My eyes are low. I look high as fuck the lights are on but no one's home at all And then you on on fourth of july that one year was fucking hilarious That's so that's that's the first time in my life where I actually believed when people would say I got blacked out I didn't know what happened. Yeah that night Thanks a lot, Eric. Yeah, that was bad. I was in your pool Last thing I remember then everything else everything else I heard was was you guys Like everything that happened after the pool. It's everything that you guys have told me

So I was in the pool and Eric made me a Eric made me a drink And from what they all said was the red solo cup filled it up 85 percent Sarac and then put enough cranberry juice to change the color And then I was in the in the in the pool and I just chugged it. I was like, yo, I'm not a bitch I'll I'll chug this And then good night. That was all I remember and then I woke up at tim scribe shout out to tim again And they got you to tim like I was at my house and I was still like cleaning up whatever and I was drunk

Like but I was like when I'm drunk and I see someone else who's like super drunk I like I stopped drinking because I'm like no one's gonna take care of this person and nick was like bad and devino drove you to um fucking johnny's house and He said that you were like Hey, it's yelling at people outside of the window and devino was like trying to get you to fucking close the window When when I woke up well the next day when I woke up. Well, actually no

No, I tucked you into a bed like I put you in a bed And then I like So we went to this kid's house and there was like a party going on there But which we also I remember we bought beers and went there first because we're like, yo We don't want to walk from your crib to his this was like what 10 15 blocks holding cases of beer Yeah, July it's 110 degrees out. Yeah, so we were like So so nick gets there I show up after and nixon the kitchen just being fucking rowdy

He's he's telling people. Yo, you'll judge me like the fucking doing nick, but anyways, kid ended up throwing up on keith's back Threw up on keith's back no big deal keith was wearing a soft neck brace at the time broke his neck. It was sick Uh, then nick was in a bed. So I just like I didn't go to the party It was just like laying in the bed There was like two beds in that room and I was laying on the other bed Just making sure this kid wasn't dead because I was like, yo if he throws up He's going to die up here and we're gonna be in the news like You know, I'm gonna have to explain that to the fucking barba walters

Like I didn't know that he was facing up I I put him on his side. He must have rolled. I didn't want to fucking deal with that shit And I woke up at oh my god, and that was the best part. So you he was like could not talk out I was I could not talk and I left him. I was like dude. I'm going home now Like he's asleep. I was I sat with you for like two hours. I think or something like that like a while I was there for a while and then I went home and then like three hours later I got a call from tim because I told him I'm like, yo Periodically go check on nick and like just keep me updated if you need help

So I get a call from tim and I'm like, oh shit So I pick up I'm like, hello and it's nick and he just goes yo wow And he was like sounded completely sober. I'm like, yo, what yo, I just woke up I walked down into their into their backyard because they were all back there It was like uh johnny tim. I think that's what was there and like some of like their friends Yeah, and they all looked at me like they saw a ghost. I was like, hey, what's up guys? I was like, yo tim can I get your phone and he's looking at me eyes wide I'm like, what's going on? He's like, yo, how are you?

How are you functioning right now? How are you speaking fun? And and then divino goes to me. He's like, yo, you drove here. I was like, yo, there's no shot you guys Whatever, let me do that. No, I was just fucking with you. He's like, I can't even lie to you because we would never do that Yeah, that was fucking crazy when you I was so surprised you were like completely sober It was crazy legend. You must have threw up everything. Yeah Johnny said the last time I threw up was it was clear. So it was like no more Yeah, and also the Super Bowl two years ago. I don't remember. Oh my god I remember kissing your tv. Well, so I play I play fan duel and draft king

so I had a really successful day that day and uh I just I just let loose. I was like, yo, I'm just gonna hammer now It's gonna be a good game Carolina Denver, you know, turned out to not be a good game at all But uh, I just remember it was Super Bowl 50 and they showed all the MVPs and I'm a You know, we're big-ass giant fans I remember kissing your tv because Eli Manning came up and that was all I remember Espo woke me up at

1030 11 he's like, yo, we gotta go. I was like, yo, the game's over. He's like, yeah, it's like who won Denver I was like, oh cool. I just went right back to bed. He's like, no, we need to leave I told Espo. I'm like, yo, you better take this kid to your house. Like I just had all these people in my house And I have to sleep downstairs and so does Keith. That was when we were sharing it. I was like I'm not sleeping on my fucking couch. I'm like, just take him. He's like, oh, I guess I'll take him I was like, yeah, you fucking asshole, but this kid Nick wakes up Later on right now. He's back to being half sober half drunk or whatever and I'm like So someone threw up in the sink downstairs and didn't clean it

and then Nick goes Yeah He goes, yo, I threw up, but I don't I don't know about not cleaning it. I was like, I know About not cleaning it because I fucking saw a pile Of the inside of a person in the sink. What do you mean? I don't know about that I think I fished it out of the drain and put it back and you and you say you're like, y'all I'm not gonna have people with my house again. And then I was like, y'all my bad I'm just never gonna come through your house again. You're like, you know, that's a lie

I don't think I'm ever gonna come back to your house. I was like, yeah, okay. I'll see you next week. You fucking piece of shit And that's exactly what happened Oh man, good times. Let's wrap this up God, I hope we don't have to tell another one of these stories like in the near future Hopefully we come back from vegas alive. That'd be nice Speaking of which if you could book my room Nice I've been saying yeah, I'll book it. Don't worry. I haven't done it yet. Everyone asks everyone asks like yo

You guys I go to vegas. I'm like, yeah, I got my flight and then I just look at joey because he has to book her He has to book her room All right, uh, where can they find you if they can if they want to contact you nick? Uh lamb vm 10 on twitter and instagram I am one fourth of veterans minimum the sports podcast. Yeah, joey and I are a part of um, I have a Sports betting and a dfs podcast. It's called degeneration bets At degeneration bet is a twitter handle and if you're a wrestling fan, it's a wrestlemania season So at at scj pod on twitter. We are the squared circle jerks. Yeah me and our brown friend frank. Let's go

That's my line All right, that's it Thanks for listening you mother fuckers