The Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast - Almost Famous OG: A Golden First Date with Deanna Pappas Part 2

Episode Date: August 17, 2023

Trista Sutter and Bob Guiney’s conversation with Deanna Pappas continues, and we hear ALL the details about her meetings with ABC about a possible return… as The Bachelorette! Deanna opens up about her divorce and how it might change the way she looks at relationships forever. Plus, Trista has to clear the air about a misunderstood “whoop”.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Oh, geez. This is Bob Guinea. And joining me today, of course, my beautiful co-host, Trista Sutter. Hi. Hi, Trista Sutter. How are you? I'm good, and I'm so excited. I don't know why it is always good. Wait, what? I missed it. Oh, no, go ahead. I'm delayed. I'm still late again. Go ahead.

Oh, okay. Sorry. I love that you always say that, but may Ren part. But anyway, I just want it. I'm so excited to welcome Gianna back to almost famous O.Gs. We get to have another chat with her. You've been our most frequent guest, actually, I think. Oh, I'm so flattered. I know. I mean. Well, I feel like we've been trying to line this up for some time because every time I do come on, Bob is unavailable or he's traveling. the world where he's heading to New York to film something. Or he's like going from hotel to cab so he can't quite

squeeze us in. So this is... Totally. You guys are silly. I'm glad to have you here. Very glad to have you. Now, for people joining us, our first most recent episode with Deanna was the Mental Recap

and Deanna and Desiree were the guests of honor with charity for that one. So make sure you tune in to hear about that because that was pretty awesome. But this one, Trista, we're getting a little, we're getting a little twist here. We're going to a little twist here, aren't we? We're taking this a little different direction. Yep. So, um, we have some real hard-in-questions for you today, Deanna. Very subtle. Yes, we're getting questions. Are you ready? No. Um, so at Mental All, we were back behind,

behind the scenes, you know, chatting with a lot of the executives. And like you said, in the episode about the Mentel All, you were like pitching Millsy about doing a vow renewal for me and Ryan for our 20th and all these different things. And I know that part of the pitching was, hey, you know, I could be the next bachelorette. Nudge, nudge, nudge. In my defense, I had had a few cocktails. In between all of our girl time backstage, Bob, they were allowing us to have a few adult beverages. So I was allowing us.

Yeah. I was feeling no pain as I was pitching my life story to everyone. I mean, I was doing the same thing with the vow renewal. I was like, and I pitched the pickleball and they actually listened and I got to go do a pickleball date with Gary. So anyway, the reason we wanted to chat today is because we have it on good authority. We have a source that has told us that you have had some meetings with ABC and no, let me stop you here.

I have not had any meetings with anyone. I literally left set a couple of weeks ago and I'm not. heard from anyone since okay we we have heard yeah we have heard that they're taking it very seriously that they're actually so funny though you look at I was partially joking because I 41 I have a very different I have a career like I can't just take eight weeks off of work we have a job I have to pay rent I have things I've got to do it got children that I need to care for and love and and raise into good humans you know what I mean but there was a That was being pretty serious about it because they brought back Brad Womack.

They brought back Nick Viol three times. You know what I mean? So they do this a lot where they bring back these men, but they've never done it with a woman before. Claire. Now, they brought Claire. They brought Claire back once, right? Yeah. Now, I will say, no offense, Bob, but the success rate on the person is a little bit better than the Bachelor.

So I realize it is likely harder to bring the Bachelorette back because of, Most of them are still married and doing really well. Right. But I think it is, the thing that I don't quite understand, and you guys will know this because you've been on the show before, they had this built-in fan base that they really don't utilize and tap into. Do you know what I mean? They don't, about a billion shows that run through my mind

where I'm like, they really could have something here. Like, why is there not like a housewives of The Bachelorette? or, you know, the parent trap of The Bachelorette. Like, there's a billion shows that I run through and don't steal my ideas. I've pitched him a time or two. But I really think that there is this entity that they really should tap into. They did a really great job with Bachelor Pad. They really did a good job with Bachelor in Paradise.

I enjoy that, but I don't. I'm not going to Paradise. I'm not your girl that needs to be frolicing around in a tiny bikini. I'm 41 and I'm past that. And I like my curves. but I'm not trying to compete with those young girls. Yeah. My people will never look the same after breastfeeding two children.

So, yep, mine neither, which is why I had them fixed. You feel me. Like there is this whole concept, you know, surrounding The Bachelor franchise that they have done themselves a disservice that they don't tap into. There really is a billion ideas for spinoff shows that they could just make a lot of money off of, to be honest. You know what I mean?

Especially with the strike going on. right now like there's so many options for reality television where scripted is you know not able to do anything so i totally agree with you now if it if it worked out you just said like i can't take eight weeks away from my job is there is there a chance that you would consider it's always a piece of me that will toy around with the idea of ever doing you know for the longest time i said i i would never do it again you know what i mean but i when i came off of the bachelor with brad you know i know i know i said this in the previous episode, but like, why wasn't I given therapy? Like, I needed therapy after that because you talk about, like, trauma on the most basic level. I was rejected and abandoned

by the person that I trusted most in that process on national talent. Like, I should have been in therapy, and they should have provided that for me. Now, once I came off of The Bachelorette, like, I had a pretty, well, I didn't make good choices, apparently, but. even the breakup from that really did a number on me because it wasn't that a relationship just ended and I'm pretty good at grieving those things when they happened. But it's that this guy ran my name into the ground and went on television crying like he didn't know that it was happening. But you know what I mean? That's not for me to take on. That was his manipulative behavior that I allowed. But they're just for a long time, I didn't want to ever go back on the show. It was not always

this really great experience for me. Like I had this really painted view of what my time on The Bachelorette was. But I also look back at that girl and even though I was really strong back then, I'm a different human being now. Right. If anything that the last couple

of years have taught me is that I've always been really strong, but I'm fucking resilient. I am resilient and not so more now than when I did when I was 26 and I was the Bachelorette that like who I am. And I'll never let another person in my life take that from me or make me feel less than

or not worthy. I've loved and accepted for who I truly am at my core. Somebody out there is going to do that. You know what I mean? I had a really wonderful 12 years with Stephen and we have two beautiful children, but I don't see this as the end of my story. It's not. For sure.

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Yeah. You know, getting divorced after being on The Bachelor, you know, became one of these things. It was like, I just felt like the biggest, there was a period where I was just like, I must be just the biggest loser in the world. I mean, I can't seem to get it right. Then you realize, no, you just put the wrong person

for who you are, right? And there's nothing wrong with that. I mean, now it's just about you thinking about where you want to go from here, which is, you know, obviously your family's first. We know that. But like you said, you're very different from when you were 26. And what if you were the bachelor? Like, let's just kick this camera around a little bit.

You know, let's just play. Let's just talk about, like, you know, because I think one of the things that I know for sure is you'd be able to walk in there. And from a format perspective, I'm sure you'd be in the driver's seat. So, like, you know, hey, that's not. I'm relatively attractive. Come on, Bob. I'd say, I'd say more so, more so than relatively.

I think you could walk in. I know you're going to command a, you know, just a swaree, a gentleman. Like, would you say to them? I mean, I'm just putting it out there. I want this range of guys. Like this is, you know, I'm willing to work within this ballpark. Or I want to get to the fantasy suites faster. Instead of doing three, I want to do six.

I mean, I'm just curious. Wait, but can I add to the same? that question because when we were hanging out before we went out to men tell all we were saying this we were like there needs to be not a golden bachelor because they're like you know in their 70s but what did you call it a like midlife or what did we call it I said there needs to be a midlife crisis bachelorette who doesn't need anyone's money who's not looking to get married again I don't want any more children I'm just a really great time like a really awkward

to a four-night stand, but that's not what I'm looking for either. Oh, no. But would you? Would you, if you, if you were just playing, like, hypotheticals here, if you did The Bachelorette, would you consider getting married again? Ooh, um, um, um, you know what? I don't think that I am in the right headspace for that to be married again. Again, Stephen and I, you know, we,

we separated a year ago. And we had a few rough years. Like Bob, I realized Tristan and I are super close. So everything that I'm saying, she has heard twice over. But we've had a really, we had a really difficult few years.

And I like what you said, Bob. And again, I appreciate that you have been where I am at currently because I've done a lot of just soul searching and I'm still me and I'm finding me again. But I'm a new me at the same time.

meaning I don't at all regret my time with Stephen. And I look back to our wedding day and I still think that like that was one of the best days of my entire life. Like early on there were there was this piece of that and you've seen it Trista and Bob, you've been around us. You've seen it too that we loved each other very much. Oh yeah, very much. We loved and respected each other enough to bring two innocent human beings into this world to love and to cherish and raise to be good humans hopefully.

So but I like what you. said, Bob, that it doesn't mean that you have to hate each other, but you can be two people who are simply not compatible for each other. And I will never ever, I didn't do it when I was 26. I'm a no BS kind of girl. I don't deal with bullshit. I don't have a radar for it. I don't deal with liars. I don't do well with betrayal. And I have a no BS radar for it. I am a come as you are. This is what you get kind of person. And I always was like that. But I feel that, more now than ever because I don't know if I will ever get married again. I joke around to all of my friends and say,

I never want to get married again because I'll tell you what divorce is. It's awful. And Bob, you know this. It is awful. It is awful. I have literally survived the most difficult few years of my entire life. You know, and we're talking about abandonment issues. I'm an anxious attachment.

I've learned a lot about myself through thousands of dollars of therapy. Yeah. But my whole point was that I wanted to ride every wave of grief. And if you've never seen the grief cycle, there's a lot of waves. And you can ride them multiple times a day. And I have. I've rid them until I can't straight. And I have cried more tears than I have ever felt.

And, you know, I'm really thankful for my group of people who literally carried me on days that I couldn't carry myself. But I say that so that everyone knows that I have come out of this, this new woman. I, there is this new version of me. And Bob, because you have been through divorce, you understand this, that when it all started to happen, you keep all of that stuff close to chest because I felt, and I don't know if you felt the same way, Bob, but I felt so much shame surrounding us. And I felt like such a failure that I wanted this marriage to work so bad. I wanted Stephen to love me and choose me.

And it's not his fault that he can't. He's just not the right person to do so. And I believe that there has to be someone else out there. that will eventually be able to do that, but that means that I get to come as myself in my whole. And I will never live in a place where like my vulnerability is used against me and I am made to feel less than or not worthy of someone's real love. So right. So long story short, Trista, I really don't know if I ever have the desire to get married again because I I don't know that I need that piece of paper for companionship.

I desire companionship, and I'll tell you what, being single for a year and finding yourself again, it is some really, you know, there are some lonely spaces in that. There's some really lonely spaces. You have to get really comfortable in yourself and in your pain and in your process and in your joy, too. I live on my own now. And I'm telling you what, there are some nights I will drink two glasses of wine and dance around naked in my living room. And it is so horrible. I love it.

You're so funny. You know what? There's not a whole lot that you've got to read in between, but... I like it. A lot of places where I'm finding to just be joyful in me and be joyful in my own space of who I am and what I desire in the world. And so I would say what I desire is to be truly and deeply loved by someone. Like, I like companionship.

I feel a deep desire to be genuinely accepted by a man and to be appreciated and to have someone that is willing to walk through the really hard stuff. I am a very imperfect human being and I have my things. I am a very bold personality and I am loud and I am kind, but I'm also like I don't take any bullshit and I have no problem saying this is what I want, which is why I don't date because I don't want to play the games. I'm like, oh, it's been an hour. Can I text him back yet?

Like, I don't want any of that. That's not time for that. You know why? Because I'm okay being alone. So, yeah, I desire companionship and I desire to be fully loved and holy for who I am. But I don't know that I ever need that sheet of paper ever again because I'm a loyal human being. And if I choose to be with someone and spend my life with someone, I am 100% committed in that way. So I don't want to say never.

Everybody keeps saying that to me. all my divorced friends they're like don't ever say never you're totally getting married again your young yeah like maybe maybe well when i got when i got divorced i said the same thing i said yeah maybe it's just the trauma and aside maybe i'm a little bit raw right now to say that i'm ready to jump into another marriage you know what i mean because i just you know divorce is awful trista like splitting up your things sharing your children yeah even if you want it even if you I mean, even your family, like your, your closest friends, the people that you hung out with, you know. You lose friendships.

You lose a family. I loved. And still do to this day, Stephen's family. And I still have a really wonderful relationship with his little sister and her husband and my nephews and my mother-in-law. Like, that will always be there. And I love them deep deep to my core. But there is this whole, it's not just separating from one person in a marriage and also the idea of what you thought the rest of your life is going to be like.

But there is also this separation of this whole other people that you truly love. You lose friendships. You lose family. You lose mother and father-in-laws. You lose that closeness. It sucks not going to family dinner on Sunday night. Like, I have to keep myself empty on Sunday nights because we've done it for the past 11 and a half years and to know I'm not included anymore.

Like, sometimes that still stings. Totally. And are the kids with him for the family dinners? So you're always alone on Sunday. No, not at all. No, no, no, no. We have a parenting plan. The kids go back and forth and, you know,

the new Sundays were really hard. You know, when Addison came to me and said, like, why aren't you allowed to come to family dinner anymore? Those times are hard. So because, you guys, my role, and again, Stephen and are trying to be really wonderful co-parents for the sake of our kids. And I'm a product of those two, y'all.

My parents did not do it with good guidelines. I'll promise you that. So I am trying really hard every day to know that, like, my children are innocent in this. And what they need to have at the end of the day is a wonderful relationship with their father and a wonderful relationship with their mother. And they are deserving of that. And I want that for my kids.

So we're pretty good. Steve and I are pretty good about sharing our kids. And, you know, I'm a flight attendant. I travel for work. This is what I do. We're really good about working that out and making sure we each get ample amount of time with the kids. And, you know, our end goal is to not come up on holidays and birthdays.

We would really like to like each other a decent amount enough to. continue to do that's important yeah that is i've seen people do it it works i do want to say um at mental all when you and watching back um you know obviously we were there in person and then watching it back on television i cringed both times so you mentioned you know that you're i'm cringing because of something i did not because of something you said i was like you're like oh god what happened i am totally knowing to stick my foot in my mouth trista so please tell me no no i was like Oh, maybe I should specify. Anyway, so you said, you know, I am single and literally, I watch it back because I was like, like, I yelled so loud.

And I was like, oh, gosh, that was really rude and disrespectful because I didn't want you to ever break up and have to go through all this trauma. But I was kind of like, in that moment, we had been talking about it, you know, getting you on, you know, the Bachelorette and whatever. And I was like, yes, let's get her a man. If she wants a man, I want her to have a man. If she doesn't want to have a man, she doesn't need a man. But I was like, I was trying to be supportive in that moment. And then I was like, oh, crap. You don't need to apologize for that.

This is the whole point of having really great friends is that they're meant to cheer you on every step of the way. And like, that makes me feel. And what wasn't shown Bob is that, you know, again, we've told you a thousand times that we hung out all day and talked. But we also do a late night dinner, just the three of us. And I say this all the time that like, I mean, I love all of the women. but I'm obviously closer to, you know, a few of the women because maybe we're in the same life phase or we just get each other, you know what I mean? And I, in the day, all of my girlfriends were like, well, how was it?

And I was like, the piece that I took away and that I loved so much was getting to spend so much time with Trista and Desiree because they are two of the women that I love so deeply and have no problem saying that I have a genuine friendship with the two of them. And they both just let me speak so freely, you know, and things that I will never say out loud or on a podcast for that matter. but they just allowed me to speak so freely and in a safe space and share my heart and my struggles and what I've walked through in the last few years. And there is just so much beauty in a friendship like that.

So I don't think you need to apologize. Trista, I would hope nothing more than you would be cheering me on every step of the way. I know, but I was like, oh gosh, I don't want people to look at that and be like, wow. She's really excited that she's single. Go ahead. Go ahead. Send them my way. Go ahead.

Oh, God. I'm sweet with you, though, Trista. I get that. I mean, you're in probably. I don't want it to look like you're like, oh, yay, she's divorced, woo. I know. I know. She loves Stephen, too.

You know what I mean? I know. There's nothing bad to say about Steven, so there's also that piece, too, where you're likely don't want to look like you're insulting him in any way, and I don't think you are. Exactly. He would take it that way. I just think that you're a great cheerleader, Trista, and I'm thankful to have you in my corner. Oh, you're sweet.

Hi, my name is Enya Yumanzoor. I'm Drew Phillips. And we run a podcast called Emergency Intercom. If you're a crime junkie and you love crimes, we're not the podcast for you. But if you have unmedicated ADHD... Oh my God, perfect. And want to hear people with mental illness, psychobabble. Yes, yes.

Then Emergency Intercom is the podcast for you. Open your free IHeartRadio app. Search Emergency Intercom and listen now. Imagine that you're on an airplane and all of... a sudden you hear this. Attention passengers. The pilot is having an emergency and we need someone, anyone to land this plane. Think you could do it? It turns out that nearly 50% of men think that they could land the plane with the help of air traffic control. And they're saying like, okay, pull this,

do this, pull that, turn this. It's just, I can do it my eyes close. I'm Manny. I'm Noah. This is Devon. And on our new show, no such thing. We get to the bottom of questions like. these. Join us as we talk to the leading expert on overconfidence. Those who lack expertise lack the expertise they need to recognize that they lack expertise. And then as we try the whole thing out for real. Wait, what? Oh, that's the run right. I'm looking at this thing. Listen to no such thing on the Iheart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Everyone thinks they'd never join a cult. But it happens all the time. to people just like you.

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and how they get out. Trust me, new episodes every Wednesday on exactly right. Listen wherever you get your podcasts. The Super Secret Festi Club podcast season four is here. And we're locked in. That means more juicy cheesement. Terrible love advice.

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I'm just like text your ex. My theory is that if you need to figure out that the. The stove is hot. Go and touch it. Go and figure it out for yourself. Okay. That's us. That's us.

My name is Curley. And I'm Maya. In each episode, we'll talk about love, friendship, heartbreak, men, and, of course, our favorite secrets. Listen to the Super Secret Bestie Club as a part of the Michael Tura podcast network available on the IHartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. So I shared this story recently. There's an organization called First Descent. It's a charity that we help support. And Ryan was really involved in them like 10 years ago.

And we went to their camps. So they're like they put on these adventure camps for young adults with cancer. And they give nicknames to every single person who either works at the camps or donates or is part of the camps. And so the very first time I went, they were like, okay, what's your nickname? And it's me and, you know, maybe a handful of other people around me. And I was like, well, what's another name for like a cheerleader, like a supporter, you know, whatever? And the way you asked me, my friend was like, jockstrap.

And of course, that's exactly what Trista wants to be known as. This is a jockstrap for her friends. That's so nice. Everyone around the O-J number one bachelor's jocet jockstrap. So that's my name for first of sense. Isn't that horrible? Yes.

I don't want to get to you at all. I think that's so funny. I got to be honest, when you said, you know, like a supporter, that went through my head. I was like, a jockstrap. I never thought a lady would say that. keep them nice and close and snug and protected. I mean, when you think about you,

just start describing those things that is, ooh, Trista, is. You're free to move, you know, giving you your space to you. I'm very protective. Like a cradle, like a cradle, you provide a cradle of friendship. It just took a hard turn.

I know, anyway, sorry. That I don't think. My mind also just went to a foul place of where I'm like, when they are getting down at night, is Ryan like my little juxtrap? Oh my God. Can you tell him I'm lonely for far too long? Diana, I think you're proving that you need to do that. That's right there. There's such a humor.

Who is telling you these rumors because I'm apparently the last to know? last to know. We have a big source. We have a source. We have a source. We have a source. We can't feel our sources. We have a very popular podcast. We got people on the inside. We got people, Deanna. We got people. People even have people. I forget how well known and popular the two of you are, you know, and to be sitting in your friends. I feel it like I'm starting to sweat just being in a inside deal here. We got some stuff. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. We're real important. They haven't had me near the show since 2003. So I don't think I'm that important.

At least, Trista's at least getting back in the grind, which is nice. Yeah, well, I mean, maybe we can change that stuff. Because I feel like what the executives have said is, like, we do want to kind of get back. Like you mentioned it, I think on the other episode, is just getting back to really the core of the show. And I think that Gary and the Golden Bachelor are going to do that. They're going to get back to the no drama, the, you know, it's not. not catty between these women, like, at least that's what I feel like is going to happen because they're in a place in their life where they don't care.

Like, they're like, I don't want to cause drama. I just want to have fun, enjoy my life. And maybe if I meet somebody that I fall in love with, awesome, you know? I feel like I'm a rare person, though. I didn't like drama when I was on The Bachelorette anyway. Like, I totally, if girls were being catty, I was like, no, I don't want any part of this. I'm going to go, like, take a nap. Like, I don't never live in my life.

like that anyway. Trista's season was that way, too. We were all buddies. I mean, he liked it that way, which actually, so then I filmed mine right after that. I'm like, hey, I don't want any drama, because I just got done with the show and we had zero drama. We really liked each other. Yeah. At the end of the day, it comes down to the lead, I think, really putting that out there. And I know Trista was, like, she loved that we were all buddies. Like, she loved it. It made me so happy because, honestly, that's a big part of what I wanted after the show. Like, I don't want to live with someone who likes drama. I want to live with someone and spend my life with someone and share it with someone who actually likes for people. We are not looking to be like traumatized

forever. Yeah. Yeah. You know what is so funny. I think that we say that they bring us back enough. You know what I mean? Because look at us. We could do this for another four hours. I mean, I think the three ways are really great. We're doing really well. There's this other piece of the show that like you understand the concept that they bring back the newest contestants because they're young and fresh and they've got 400,000 followers or whatever that looks like, you know what I mean? And obviously, the show is successful for a reason because the popularity is still driven. And like, let's be honest, if they bring me back to speak to someone and give them advice, it's not because I am boosting ratings in this show.

Like half the time people don't even know who I am anymore. You know, so I get the concept, but I am always really thankful that when they do bring us back, because, come on, there's this other selfish piece that still makes you feel special. Well, totally. And what I do want to say to that is that I, you know, our seasons were, I don't know what the numbers are now,

but the viewership back then was in the double digit millions, you know, like I think our, my engagement with Ryan was 31 million people were watching. And now I wonder if they even get three. And so there were like 31 people, watching back then and all of these people have aged 20 years and I feel like they're missing out on that demographic of the like mid age midlife um whatever you want to call it um women especially women and men who watch the show raising their kids whatever and now their kids are watching the show

or their grandkids are watching the show and I feel like why not bring back the demographic of the people who like watched our seasons. So I feel like if you are the Bachelorette, Deanna, if you decide to be the Bachelorette officially ask you, then I feel like it will bring all these people back who actually really, really supported the show originally, like back in it. How fun would it be for every single episode to be my OG friends? Like, don't bring back the 20-somethings, bring back my Trista, bring back my Bob. Yes. I love that. You know what I mean?

So fun. Like, let's do it. Like, let's do it. bring back all the old people who like none of us have any fucks to give. You know what I mean? Right. We're all in it for like the the genuine love aspect of the show. And that the other piece is like we all genuinely like each other. So who better to let have back?

And again, in this dream scenario of if I was a bachelorette to allow people like us to come back and be like, listen, y'all, this is how the show really is. This is how it should really go. this is how far in-depth you should allow yourself. This is the piece that's really beautiful of this show, and this is what you can take away from it. You know what I mean? Let's do that.

Let's do that. And you come away with a relationship, and there's not, there doesn't need to be a tag on it. You know what I mean? It doesn't, you can give a Neil Lane promise ring or, you know, whatever it is.

It was a different person back in the day when I trusted I were doing it, but, you know, I know who it is now. So you can give that ring still as a simple, of an ongoing relationship if you want to. And if not, you close a box and you know what they're going. Let's see where it goes. Let's do real life together.

So maybe you guys, maybe the dates are not these over the top helicopter over volcanoes dates because those aren't real life. Maybe it's me taking them to the park and seeing if they can clean up dog shit because I have a dog. You know, let's see how well they feel about that. Or maybe it's like me taking them and they're driving me to work and then I don't see them for two weeks and see how they sit in that. are like sitting watching you watch a real housewife marathon and not talking

no i'm yeah let's think more around outlander let's make them sit down and watch there you go with me outlander yeah claire and james fraser vibes like in my next life that's what i want claire and james right i know me too what episode are you on what episode are you on She'd be really, honestly, but you're going to ask me, I'm in the middle of this. Oh, sorry, sorry. So, yeah, I'll go to the other room. That's love in real life. Yeah, yeah, exactly.

At the end of the day, in our own element with, like, I mean, I feel really pretty today, but, like, this is not every day. Like, let's see each other where I haven't washed my hair for four days, and I don't have makeup on in my malasma showing, and my pants are too tight because I have a really big rear end. You know, I look back at that. I look really, I do. I look back at that season four girl, that batch.

Lorette, and I thought, physically, I felt the most beautiful that I ever had. But emotionally, I wasn't quite me yet. You know what I mean? I was welcome my way to being me, but like now I look at myself and I feel so deeply secure in who I am as a person, both outside and inside. And I'm, you know, that's being the realist that I've ever been. Like, I am broken. I have been broken, not completely broken, but I've put myself back together.

And I'm not 120 pounds anymore. I'm a grown-ass woman and I've nursed two children and I've burr of two babies. This body is a warrior. You know what I mean? Like me for that. Love me for that. That's real. That's who I am.

Love it. Preach. I'm great, ladies gentlemen. I'm fired up. I want to see it. So I'm going to. You're going to call your people and then you're going to call me and you're going to tell me all the insides that I don't know because I feel a little in the dark, but I'm, I am super flattered.

I just keep saying you're thinking, like, dumb and dumb are like, so you're telling me there's a chance. There's a chance. Always a chance. There's honestly. I'm not going to, I'm never going to get married to. You're telling me there's a chance. There is always a chance. I really was, Bob. I'm not lying. I was had a few cocktails. I was really joking when I was pitching my coming back as The Bachelorette. And then the more I thought about it, I was like, they'd be really stupid if they don't jump on something like that. It doesn't have to be me, you know what I mean? But they seem really stupid if you don't jump on that. And the only other thing I was going to say,

and Trista, you probably can relate, is when I look on my social media, I am literally followed by like 98% women. And most of the women who message me, you can imagine, because I was on 15 years ago, they had been watching the show, and a lot of them will say, even today, right? They posted yesterday that Trista and Desiree and I are on,

and so many people wrote me and said, I just love that it's the three of you. I've been watching as Trista was on and I love Trista and I love Desiree and I love you and I wish the show would be that again and there's this right that's what I was saying that that night there is this beautiful piece that like you can take this and you can bring it back to where it started to what it was and when it was really good you really can do that it can see a great full circle moment wouldn't it yeah I think it's a good idea I do too I will I love it.

I'll just email some people as soon as I hang up. All right. Keep us posted. Come here first. Come here first to make your announcement. That's all that. When the announcement is made, they've got to have me back on because it would make no sense to have me on any other podcast. That's right.

Especially if I'm so much. And listen, we're OGs for a reason. It has to be released here, don't you think? That's right. I do. I love it. I love. So you're telling me if there's a chance.

All right, Deanna, thank you again for coming on again. and letting us kind of talk hypothetically and in Dreamland. And who knows, maybe Dreamland will come true. Maybe there is a man out there who can handle this strong, independent woman. Maybe he's out. Oh, there is. I know there is. All right, I love you guys.

Thanks so much for having me. Love you too. Trista call me as soon as you hang up. I will. Bye, guys. Bye. she is so awesome thanks for joining us for almost famous oh geez uh i love talking to her i you know like she said she is you know such a close friend and um it's heartbreaking what she went

through um just you know like anybody else and going through divorce when you are when you are truly in love it's it's heartbreaking and so um i was asking her about sunday nights if she was alone on Sunday nights because I want to like put a reminder in my phone to just text her or say you know I'm thinking about you you're so thoughtful like to have with your friends I love that about you but anyway so I love having Deanna and who knows maybe it'll come to fruition I hope it does I'm so fired enough about it I think it's the greatest thing ever I agree I would love to see it I I wonder if she would actually be able to make it work But maybe they can, maybe they can, you know, do it in installments or something so that she can actually, you know, do a couple weeks and then be with the kids for a week and that, you know, who knows. But anyway, it was great to chat, as always.

Yes, me. Thank you for joining us, everybody. We appreciate it. I'm glad we're back together again. We had a couple weeks where we're doing the show, but, you know, not together. So I'm just glad we're back on. Agreed. Agreed.

Love you, Bob. Thanks for doing, everybody. And we'll talk to you soon. Bye-bye. Bye. Hi, my name is Enya Emanzor. And I'm Drew Phillips. And we run a podcast called Emergency Intercom.

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