The Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast - Catching Up with Sarah Herron

Episode Date: September 19, 2023

DISCLAIMER: This conversation covers sensitive topics (child loss, infertility). Ben and Ashley sit down with Sarah Herron from Sean Lowe’s season of The Bachelor for a raw and real conversation about her new marriage, her IVF journey, and how she’s finding healing after a devastating loss.  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is an I-Heart podcast. Hi, my name is Enya Eumanzor. And I'm Drew Phillips. And we run a podcast called Emergency Intercom. If you're a crime junkie and you love crimes, we're not the podcast for you. But if you have unmedicated ADHD... Oh my God, perfect. And want to hear people with mental illness, psychobabble.

Yes, yes. Then Emergency Intercom is the podcast for you. Open your... free iHeartRadio app search emergency internetcom and listen now I just normally do straight stand-up but this is a bit different what do you get when a true crime producer

walks into a comedy club answer a new podcast called Wisecrack where a comedian finds himself at the center of a chilling true crime story does anyone know what show they've come to see it's a story it's about the scariest night of my life

this is Wisecrack available now listen to Wisecrack on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Every case that is a cold case that has DNA. Right now in a backlog will be identified in our lifetime. On the new podcast, America's Crime Lab, every case has a story to tell. And the DNA holds the truth. He never thought he was going to get caught.

And I just looked at my computer screen. I was just like, ah, gotcha. This technology is already solving so many cases. Listen to America's Crime Lab on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. What would you do if one bad decision forced you to choose between a maximum security prison or the most brutal boot camp designed to be hell on earth? Unfortunately for Mark Lombardo, this was the choice he faced. He said, you are a number, a New York State number, and we own you.

Listen to shock incarceration on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcast. podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. Before we start our interview with Sarah, we just wanted to let you guys know to warn you that the subject matter discussed will be sensitive in nature, some of it pertaining to child loss and infertility. This is the Ben and Ashley I, almost famous podcast with IHeartRadio. One of our favorite guests, somebody that comes back, Not enough, but often, one of our favorite people who has some very excited things going on in her life, Sarah Heron.

Hello, and welcome back to the Almost Famous Podcast. Hi, guys. I know I love, love catching up with you. Thanks for having me. Sarah, you have had a year that no one should ever have. I'm just so, so sorry for everything you've gone through. I've been following every into story that you've ever posted in the past like seven months. have watched. You are literally like the strongest person I could ever imagine. And I know that last,

I mean, just for anybody who's listening who doesn't know, you lost your baby at about 20 weeks. And I'm so sorry. I just don't even want to like, I know. I don't think, I don't even want to like go there. You know, it's okay. I mean, it does just mean so much to talk to you, Ashley, because you have been so sweet and so kind through the whole experience. I'm sorry, I'm very emotional apparently at 9 a.m. on a.m. on a.m. on Monday morning. But, yeah, I do just want to express my gratitude to you, Ashley, because you have, like, you've checked in, you've stayed in touch. And that's really all that someone needs when they go through this, you know, is just to know that people are thinking of them. and oh my gosh i'm always thinking about you um so i like how willing are you to talk talk about

oliver right now oh i i i mean i love talking about oliver and i'm happy to um to share my story you know i haven't really had the chance to really talk about it too much i've only really like publicly talked about our lost journey once so far and I didn't even realize like when I was doing it was like oh this is the first time I've really kind of you know publicly talked about it and it's it's cathartic and I also think it's a perspective of pregnancy and loss that many women unfortunately go through and feel very isolated in so I mean truly I see it's the same way I've always been. I'm an open book and I just hope that by talking about Oliver, I can spread his legacy and, you know, and just help anyone else who hears like that they're not alone.

And unfortunately, like, this happens more than we talk about. And yeah, I just want, I want women to know that they're not alone. Well, sorry, I don't know. I'm like coming in super emotionally charged. No, we love it. And like you seriously just, you and Dylan

getting through this together just is a testament to how strong your relationship is. Yeah. Because you hear about how baby loss just a lot of the times drives the parents apart. And it seems to have bonded you guys

and now you just got married in the Grand Canyon a few weeks ago. It was a beautiful ceremony. It was so Sarah Heron. I could not imagine you to have a more you ceremony. And I mean that in like the most beautiful way. Yeah, totally. I know, and you're absolutely right.

You know, it's interesting as I obviously have followed your story as well, Sarah. You know, you said something a second ago that sat with me for a second, took me back. You know, this is your year has been emotional in so many different. different ways. It seems like from an outside perspective that has great loss and also some great joys and some, you know, it just, it feels like it has been, you know, a very hard year because sometimes those two things combined make it a very difficult year when you're all celebrating, but you're also grieving. But you said something that said, you know, you haven't talked about it publicly, only maybe once, and then on your socials.

You know, because I guess you can answer to why. Maybe you haven't talked about it publicly. Maybe you haven't been given the platform or been asked the right questions. But within that, then you said that so many, this isn't uncommon. Other people go through it. And as a result, when they go through it, they feel incredibly alone, isolated. And so if you can speak to that, if you don't mind for a second, of that kind of starting with, you know, the start of this year and that experience and what you want to tell to other people who are

going through this. And then we can move on maybe at the end to something that is a joy-filled ceremony, something to celebrate. Yeah, totally. And I mean, Ben, you're absolutely right. Like, how do you summarize a year that has brought some of the best joys of my life and some of the hardest walks? I mean, it's the year that I got pregnant. And it's the year that I got to experienced pregnancy and I ultimately did deliver my son. Those are beautiful things. And then they're also laced with loss. And so it is the grief of that and navigating the grief of amazing experiences laced with grief is just it's the hardest walk that any parent will have to go through. And to answer your question, I mean, I really haven't spoken. I've written a

ton about my loss. And actually writing about loss has been extremely helpful and cathartic. And at times it just like flows out of me. And I'm like, I don't know who wrote that. But writing has been a great outlet. But as far as like speaking or giving interviews, I just haven't really had the opportunity. I think, you know, out of respect and just bereavement, you know, no one came forward wanting to have me on the podcast or anything like that until recently. and I can completely understand why. So that's what I meant by, you know, that I haven't really talked about it publicly. I hadn't really, like, used my own voice live to talk about my experience.

But through everything and prior to even becoming pregnant with Oliver, I was in this club of infertility. And anyone who has gone through fertility challenges knows that there's this. kind of like untrademarked saying that it is the worst club with the best members. And I think truly like going through our loss, the only thing that really helped Dylan and I both survive and get through it was community and connecting with other women who have gone through this, other parents, other dads. There are so many great organizations out there that we have been put in touch with to help us just get through some of the hardest hurdles of this.

And then, you know, we worked with a grief counselor as well. And so I think, you know, what I would love to convey to anyone listening who has experienced pregnancy loss or infant loss or I don't know if you come back and listen to this podcast, if you experience it someday is just that. There are women who've gone through it who know how to walk this road and you do not have to do it alone. I think infertility alone, we're still kind of destigmatizing infertility and we're still breaking down some of the shame around infertility, pregnancy loss, miscarriage. But as we continue to move that needle forward and pull back the curtain on it, there's just so much connection.

and resources that can be shared between people. And like I said, it's just, I've been connected to thousands of women now who are like, I've been in your shoes. It might seem hard to believe right now, but joy does come back. It does not get easier, but it gets different. And you'll regain strength. The most important part is to stay connected to your partner. Seek support.

Get grief counseling. if you have the means to. And I think just like keep an open line of communication with your family and support team. Sarah, one thing that I don't know that you've broached on your social media is what exactly happened because you delivered Oliver. It wasn't a miscarriage. He was 20 weeks? He was, so he was 24 weeks.

24 and 5 days. So almost 25. weeks but um he just um you know actually I think that is kind of an area I'm not quite ready to talk about yeah of course but yeah it was just unexpected and I was able to deliver him and he was he was alive for about 20 minutes with us which was amazing and we didn't expect him to survive birth, but we did have 20 minutes with him, and we both got to have skin-to-skin contact with him. And he was just right at that viability cusp, and unfortunately just didn't, his little heart

couldn't survive it. So, yeah. There's a few elements I would love to touch on here. one would be if you're comfortable with it and please only answer things you're comfortable with what what were those 20 minutes like and then you obviously said earlier you want to spread his legacy and share Oliver's legacy so obviously that 20 minutes had a huge impact on the two of you so what did you take what are you taking from that well the 20 minutes he spent with him I mean it was surreal because my labor was very long and so we were told you know

because he because of his gestational age and how long the labor was progressing that he could be potentially still born alive or he might pass during labor and so we didn't really know what to expect but we prepared ourselves for what whichever outcome and so you know it just like I said it was progressing very slowly it took a very long time and so when he was born it just takes you like I just the best way I can describe it is like I don't know I felt kind of euphoric and kind of in a dream state and I was scared honestly because you kind of get hit with this emotion of like you didn't know what to expect and now you have to kind of shift I don't know just your perception and so immediately the nurse is just like odd at him like he was

such a perfect little angel and immediately was he's so long and looked a lot like Dylan and they were just like would you like you know would you like to hold him skin to skin and I said of course and they put him on my chest and he was so tiny and just making all the little baby noises that they do and then I my instinct was just like I want Dylan to hold him like I we don't know how long we have I want Dylan to hold him now and so he went to Dylan's chest skin to skin and he you know quietly just stopped breathing while Dylan was holding him and we found a lot of like comfort and strength and knowing that he got to be held by his mother and experience the unconditional love of his mother and then he got to be held by his father and

experience the ultimate form of protection and safety from his father and kind of just a symbol that it was okay. He didn't need to be afraid and that we were there to carry him through that journey for his little spirit. So it was a dream state for sure and it went by in the blink of an eye and I just, the nurses in that room were, I can't describe them any other way, besides just angels. I mean, they were so loving and doting on him and us, and it was remarkable. My boyfriend's professor is way too friendly,

and now I'm seriously suspicious. Wait a minute, Sam. Maybe her boyfriend's just looking for extra credit. Well, Dakota, it's back to school week on the OK Storytime podcast, so we'll find out soon. This person writes, My boyfriend has been hanging out with his young professor a lot. He doesn't think it's a problem, but I don't trust her.

Now, he's insisting we get to know each other, but I just want her gone. Now, hold up. Isn't that against school policy? That sounds totally inappropriate. Well, according to this person, this is her boyfriend's former professor, and they're the same age. And it's even more likely that they're cheating. He insists there's nothing between them. I mean, do you believe him?

Well, he's certainly trying to get this person to believe him because he now wants them both to meet. So, do we find out if this person's boyfriend really cheated with his person? professor or not. To hear the explosive finale, listen to the OK Storytime podcast on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. Hi, my name is Enya Umanzor. And I'm Drew Phillips. And we run a podcast called Emergency Intercom. If you're a crime junkie and you love crimes, we're not the podcast for you. But if you have unmedicated ADHD, ADHD, oh my God, perfect. And want to hear people with mental illness, psychobabble. Yes, yes. Then Emergency Intercom is the podcast for you.

Open your free IHeartRadio app. Search Emergency Intercom and listen now. What would you do if one bad decision forced you to choose between a maximum security prison or the most brutal boot camp designed to be hell on earth? Unfortunately for Mark Lombardo, this was the choice he faced. He said, you are a number, a New York State number, and we own you. Shock incarceration, also known as boot camps,

are short-term, highly regimented correctional programs that mimic military basic training. These programs aim to provide a shock of prison life, emphasizing strict discipline, physical training, hard labor, and rehabilitation programs. Mark had one chance to complete this program and had no idea of the hell awaiting him the next six months. The first night was so overwhelming,

and you don't know who's next to you. And we didn't know what to expect in the morning. Nobody tells you anything. Listen to shock incarceration on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, sis, what if I could promise you you never had to listen to a condescending finance, bro, tell you how to manage your money again. Welcome to Brown Ambition. This is the hard part when you pay down those credit cards. If you haven't gotten to the bottom of why you were racking up credit or turning to credit cards, you may just recreate the same problem a year from now.

When you do feel like you are bleeding from these high interest rates, I would start shopping for a debt consolidation loan, starting with your local credit union, shopping around online, looking for some online lenders because they tend to have fewer fees and be more affordable. Listen, I am not here to judge. It is so expensive in these streets. I 100% can see how in just a few months you can have this much credit card debt when it weighs on you. It's really easy to just like stick your head in the sand. It's nice and dark in the sand. Even if it's scary, it's not going to go away just because you're avoiding it. And in fact, it may get even worse.

For more judgment-free money advice, listen to Brown Ambition on the Iheart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. There is the second element that I wanted to touch on, though, was obviously we're going to move in here to your recent wedding. And that's a very exciting time. It's kind of the emotion that we talked about, the goods. and the hards and the moments of life that are very probably confusing, I would imagine, to try to walk through. But you and Dylan stayed connected through this. And as Ashley mentioned, it is not unknown that these really hard situations can

oftentimes pull couples apart. But you guys stayed connected and leading up to a wedding. For myself, who's married, for Ashley who is married, for you who is married, for listeners who are in relationships, what are some of the things that you could teach us about that season of life on why you stay connected, why you grew stronger? Maybe you didn't grow stronger and maybe that's something you need to be honest about. I don't know. But like, just walk us through that season. Yeah, of course. So when we, I don't remember exactly who made the recommendation, but they were like, I highly recommend you seek a grief-specific counselor because I've been

in therapy weekly for the last four years. Obviously, we continued that. Dylan and I both got in to see my therapist, but someone said to work with a grief-specific counselor would be really helpful because they can help parents, couples, navigate loss. Because ultimately what I learned is men and women experience grief very differently. I mean, I think both you, Ashley and Ben, can probably attest to this, that grief is just handled differently. Men have sometimes a better ability to compartmentalize or get busy and kind of move on a little bit faster, whereas the birth mother or the gestational mother, it takes so much longer.

I mean, you had a baby that you no longer have. There's the physical component. There's the emotional component. And so, yes, couples going through infant loss, child loss, or any type of grief or loss, run a risk of it either making or breaking the relationship or certainly putting an insurmountable amount of strain on the relationship. And so for Dylan and I, it has brought us closer. And, you know, it's unfortunate that we had to have this experience that maybe.

us so connected but it really taught us our communication styles it taught us how we grieve how to respect each other's grief and mourning processes and it just reinforced that like we're in this together um so yeah i don't know it's like i think to go back to oliver's legacy like i truly believe his soul had big, big purpose. And even though his life was so short, I think he had a job. And part of that job might have been to connect Dylan and I deeper. It might have been to walk this path so that we can know how to help others. You know, I think Oliver continues to teach us things that we benefit from every single day. And I mean, it's a horrible lesson, of course, that no one wishes. But yeah, I'm, I've just, I try to see what Oliver has taught me through all

of this. So you guys were engaged before you conceived Oliver. Yes. What were the wedding plans before this year? Were you planning on having a full wedding or was it always sort of an elopement idea. The timeline to our wedding and just our whole relationship has been a little untraditional because we got engaged and then started IVF immediately because it was during COVID like we realized we really wanted to have kids but we weren't married yet and we had started trying to conceive naturally and it wasn't working. So we got started doing IVF like literally the same time that we got engaged and then because I was going through treatments and then I got pregnant. I was always like, I don't want to plan a big wedding because I don't know what's

going to happen. I don't, I don't know if we're going to have a wedding in Mexico and then I won't be able to go because I'm pregnant, whatever, right? So everything just kind of kept getting postponed. And then after losing Oliver, we were kind of like, I don't know, your perspectives and certainly your like appreciation for things change. And so a priority of like having a big wedding just wasn't important to us anymore. We wanted to have a commitment ceremony. We wanted to have our closest friends and family there, but like I couldn't get motivated to plan a wedding. I couldn't get inspired. I would look at wedding dresses and I wasn't even into anything. And so we were like, you know what, maybe we should just elope. And then about three

months ago, we got invited on this trip. Well, it was, we want a permit to host a trip down the Grand Canyon and we were like maybe this could be a cool adventure elopement style wedding we can i can just buy like a cheapy dress online and like a veil on amazon and we'll just say some vows and that'll be it like it'll be epic and low budget and we don't have to worry about trying to get family in town or like you know just all the logistics of it and so we came up with that plan literally like two weeks before. And I called my parents and I was like, would you be sad if we do this and you're not there? And my mom was just like, oh, no, do it. Just go. I think you need to do it. Just do it. And it all turned out like magically. It was like so perfectly us. Well, so

the wedding ceremony was at mile 75 of the Colorado River. Yeah. Was that just random or is that a spot that has meaning to you? No. So, okay, when you're when you go on a rafting, trip down the Grand Canyon. It's 225 miles. And you have to complete that in about 16 days. So before going into the trip, your raft guides or whoever's leading the trip, we'll have to kind of assess that we need to do 20 miles a day, 15 miles a day, whatever, and you map out your days. So we knew we're going to be camping at this particular beautiful camp with epic views in ledges that we could, you know, like it would be perfect. And it's not so far into the trip that something might happen. We might get bad weather. Like all the variables that could have,

you know, swayed us away from actually going through with it. So we just decided day of, we're like, we're at this campsite. It's beautiful. We don't know what lies ahead of us. Bad weather could come. Let's just do it. And it was just totally spontaneous. So like I had never seen a photo of the campsite or anything, we just decided to pull the trigger. So I've done some rafting trips in my life. You just said you were guiding a trip. I'm assuming you had other participants with you, right? Yes.

Or is it just the two of you? What were, I mean, most of the time, you're strangers when you walk down to the river together, and you jump on these boats, what were they thinking when you were like, hey, we're getting married today? Yeah. So this was our river permit, which means we invited 16 of our best river friends. And so we knew everyone, but they didn't know what we were planning to do until the trip. And we were like, hey, we think we're going to get, or not engaged, we think we're going to elope if we find a good camp.

And then that just, you know, made everyone else so excited that it just elevated the energy. And we're like, okay, so we were all kind of scouting. for the first four days. Like, this would be a good camp. This would be a great ledge or look over. And everyone was super supportive. My boyfriend's professor is way too friendly. And now I'm seriously suspicious.

Wait a minute, Sam. Maybe her boyfriend's just looking for extra credit. Well, Dakota, it's back to school week on the OK Storytime podcast. So we'll find out soon. This person writes, my boyfriend has been hanging out with his young professional. a lot. He doesn't think it's a problem, but I don't trust her. Now he's insisting we get to know each other, but I just want her gone. Now hold up, isn't that against school policy? That sounds totally

inappropriate. Well, according to this person, this is her boyfriend's former professor, and they're the same age. And it's even more likely that they're cheating. He insists there's nothing between them. I mean, do you believe him? Well, he's certainly trying to get this person to believe him because he now wants them both to meet. So, do we find out if this person's boyfriend really cheated with his professor or not? To hear the explosive phenomenon, Listen to the OK Storytime podcast on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. Hi, my name is Enya Umanzor. And I'm Drew Phillips.

And we run a podcast called Emergency Intercom. If you're a crime junkie and you love crimes, we're not the podcast for you. But if you have unmedicated ADHD... Oh my God, perfect. And want to hear people with mental illness, psycho babble. Yes, yes. Then Emergency Intercom is the podcast for you. you open your free iHeart radio app search emergency intercom and listen now hey sis what if i could promise you you never had to listen to a condescending finance bro tell you how to manage your money again welcome to brown ambition this is the hard part when you pay down those credit cards if you haven't gotten to the bottom of why you were racking up credit or turning to credit cards you may just recreate the same problem a year from now when you do feel like you are bleeding from these high interest rates i would start shopping for a debt consolidation loan

starting with your local credit union, shopping around online, looking for some online lenders because they tend to have fewer fees and be more affordable. Listen, I am not here to judge. It is so expensive in these streets. I 100% can see how in just a few months you can have this much credit card debt when it weighs on you. It's really easy to just like stick your head in the sand. It's nice and dark in the sand. Even if it's scary, it's not going to go away just because you're avoiding it. And in fact, it may get even worse. For more judgment-free money advice, Listen to Brown Ambition on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. What would you do if one bad decision forced you to choose between a maximum security prison

or the most brutal boot camp designed to be hell on earth? Unfortunately for Mark Lombardo, this was the choice he faced. He said, you are a number, a New York State number, and we own you. Shock incarceration, also known as boot camps, are short-term, highly regimented correctional programs that mimic military basic training. These programs aim to provide a shock of prison life, emphasizing strict discipline, physical training, hard labor, and rehabilitation programs. Mark had one chance to complete this program and had no idea of the hell awaiting him the next six months.

The first night was so overwhelming and you don't know who's next to you. And we didn't know what to expect in the morning. Nobody tells you anything. Listen to shock incarceration on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Sarah, I see your dog behind you. And I know we're backtracking a conversation a little bit, but I can't help to ask if you can tell everybody what he has been for you as a comfort over the past seven, eight months. Yes, yes. Rio, my love, my witness.

miss my he's like my soul may I swear Rio um yeah I don't know they say when you go through grief like you just need to have your grief witnessed um it it means like someone who isn't going to try to point out the silver linings of it someone who isn't going to try to minimize it or make it something that it isn't but someone to just sit with you in the pain and witness the magnitude of your suffering and I think that was my dog um because Because he sat with me every single day and, you know, obviously leading up when I was pregnant, he would sit on my lap and sit on my belly. And when I lost Oliver, he didn't skip a beat. And he is attached to my hip and it's probably a little bit unhealthy, the relationship we have now.

But he's just, he's my everything. I'm obsessed with this dog. And so being away from him on the Grand Canyon for three weeks was like the hardest thing I've ever done. Yeah. I think, you know, it's funny, just a little tangent this morning in my daily devotional, the title of it was Mereed Suffering Leads to Compassion. And I think that's exactly what you're speaking about. You know, having your witness and then having people rally around you. As we kind of close up here, obviously there is now this thing that you've entered into marriage. And, obviously, as we said, this year has been a wild year for you.

One that I can't put words to, but one that, you know, obviously has been a year. And it feels very much like life has hit you in the face. So as you enter into marriage now with Dylan, is there anything you're scared of? I was scared entering into marriage personally. I was like, I don't know what kind of husband I'm going to be. I don't know how we're going to get through difficult times. I don't know how she loads the dishwasher or how I live the dishwasher and what's really going to piss each other off. But obviously your year has been a year.

And so now you're married entering into this commitment. Is there anything you're nervous about or how do you feel personally? Oh, that's a really great question. I obviously know how we'll get through difficult times together now, which I think, yeah, I mean, anything could happen. but I'm not really afraid of anything in terms of marriage. Like I have never felt so good about a life partner. I love Dylan so much. I know he loves me so much.

I think the biggest thing that going through what we've gone through now is, and it's still fresh, right? Like our loss was only eight months ago. And so this will be forever with us probably, but I think it's the fear of more loss. It's the fear of losing each other. And when you go through something like this, I actually just shared a video on Instagram,

this amazing poem that was written by a young woman who obviously has experienced loss, but it kind of teaches you that everyone and everything around you is impermanent. And so I think that's like just my biggest fear now is this is life. is short and it's impermanent and just how to like savor every day together. And so I think Dylan and I just try to, you know, we're not big into material things. We're more into experiences and creating memories together. And I just, I just look forward to like maximizing our life

experiences together. But not a lot of fear. He already sucks at loading the dishwasher. So I know that's like past us. Yeah. Another thing you're entering in on right now is another round of IVF. Mm-hmm. You announced this yesterday on your Instagram, and you said that the first one you kept secret, does that mean that you have recently undergone one? Yeah, I went through one.

We had an embryo transfer in June that was not successful. Mm-hmm. So we did keep that one private because we were like, let's just try and see what it feels like to keep something of our lives private for once. And I'm sure, you know, you guys can relate. Like sometimes you just want to keep some things closer that don't need to be shared every inch of the mile. And so we kept that one private. But again, going back to the community component, it was like I felt then. that when the embryo transfer didn't succeed, it was kind of like, well, you know, it really made me realize how much I appreciate the collective support from people who are coming along on this journey with me. And I don't know about you guys, but I love, I love all of my followers and everyone that engages with me. And I truly feel, even though we have maybe never met in person sometimes, like we're in it together. And so going into this embryo transfer, I was

like, I want to feel the collective support. I want, you know, the collective prayers and good energy and thoughts. And I want to be able to provide that for people, too. So for me, I'm like, okay, come along. We're going. We're starting this again. And, and I think it just helps keep positivity and morale high, you know, which you need when you go through something like this. Yeah. There is, there's so much that we can learn from. you, Sarah. So much we can learn from Dylan. And I'm very thankful that you have given us the time. Now, here's the commitment that we need you to make, though. You got to come back. You've got to keep this updated. I know, I mean, I don't know. I imagine doing this is like a little daunting,

maybe a little very difficult. But we're thankful that you're using your voice because, as you said, as you speak openly about it, then other people will feel less alone. And that's something that's vitally important for us as humans. So thank you for using your voice for so many. Of course. Hopefully, at least one person listening can listen to this and be like, hey, I feel less alone. And then it's all right. Yeah. And Sarah, nobody is rooting for, like, you are the most rootable person right now. Like, I love that you shared what you're entering into because I truly like am emitting positive energy towards you and I know there's so many women out there who are thinking about you through this all like we're just rooting for you so hard and you're going to be

the best mom one day and we hope it happens now but like we have faith that it'll it'll happen whatever way it's supposed to thanks guys and I you're already a mom you are yeah thank you thank you thanks for saying that and I just want to say like I think part of why you know maybe I just like immediately broke down in tears at the beginning is because it's um it's also special to talk to you you guys like i know you both personally and i've known you've known me since before all of this and so it's kind of sometimes like when you walk into a room and you see someone that you haven't seen in a long time and you just like get overtaken by this wave of emotions and i felt like safe with you guys and i know you truly care and and so yeah i don't know it's like they're happy

tears they're authentic and it means a lot to share with you guys and um and to catch up with you and have you so invested in my life i really appreciate it because i love you guys and i'm invested in your lives yeah well you're teaching us a lot sarah you always have um you know as we close here i do want to just give uh you've done so much good work uh in your life um giving uh people accessibility to adventures and travels and you know amazing things is that still a piece of your life yes that's a great question so um there's been a bit of a pivot if you're speaking directly about like my organization with she lift that i was running a couple years ago we're not operating anymore um it's actually interesting because coming off the grand canyon i was very like re-inspired like

you know, accessibility in the outdoors is still something that I want to strive, you know, push for and advocate for and create experiences for people who might not otherwise get to experience them. So there's definitely still a pull on my heart to create that kind of work for people. IVF definitely kind of derailed all that for the last couple of years. So I would say I'm like doing that work from my heart and I'm still advocating for. for people to get out in the outdoors and experience its benefits, but as far as having an organization right now, not currently. Well, yeah, I mean, but you're, you're always involved and we're, I mean, that's a big

update. Hopefully we'll be falling up with you on is kind of how you're being involved. I know this week, one of my buddies, Brandon, I won't say his last thing even though I don't think he'd care. He's paralyzed from the waist down and he competed in the CrossFit game. nice and if you want to see something impressive you see a dude hang and do like 50 pull-ups with like a wheelchair tied to them like that is just amazing so that work obviously you started it it's still continuing it's not like it just ends for you yeah you're always inspiring well yeah because people have gone to the mountains and they've been on a ski or they've been able to do these height you know do these things that they did with you and then maybe that passion has continued within

them so yes the organization might have paused or stopped but the passion doesn't there's always that ripple sarahann you are somebody that brings a light to this world we're thankful for you thank you for coming on thank you for sharing your story we're rooting you on as many are we always will be and please come back soon yeah we love you so much always signing off okay i've been ashley i've been ben And I am Sarah, is that? Yeah, that works. You are Sarah. Yeah, you are.

That works for us. Follow the Ben and Ashley I, almost famous podcast on IHartRadio or subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts. Hi, my name is Enya Umanzor. And I'm Drew Phillips. And we run a podcast called Emergency Intercom. If you're a crime junkie and you love crimes, we're not the podcast for you. But if you have unmedicated ADA, Oh my God, perfect.

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