The Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast - Dirty Rush: Tell me Lies: The Truth About Sorority Life
Episode Date: September 27, 2025We’ve assembled a group of sorority women to address the rumors, the misperceptions and the flat out lies of sorority life. Call us at 844-278-RUSH (844-278-7874) or email us at DirtyRush@iHeart...Radio.com. Follow Dirty Rush on Instagram and TikTok.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Welcome to Dirty Rush, The Truth About Sorority Life, with your host, me, Gia Judice,
Daisy Kent, and Jennifer Fessler.
Okay, everyone, welcome back to Dirty Rush.
And today we're talking to some anonymous sorority girls that we're.
have here. Would anyone like to say their actual name or do we want to keep it anonymous?
Hmm. I'll say my name. I'm kidding. I'm going to go with the word. No. I'm the producer. She's the
producer. She's the producer. So I think I'll say my name. I'm Lauren. I'm Gracie. I can say a
fake name. Okay. I was thinking you all were going to be like no and I'm. I'm Gracie. I'm Gracie. I can say a fake name. I was thinking you all were going to be like no and
But I'd be like, we have so juice to smell.
Explain why.
Here's why we're being so mysterious.
Okay, so we are going to be talking about some myths and, like, all the tea around sororities and being, like, actually real with all of you.
And so some people are saying anonymous just because they got a lot to say.
It's very interesting because even, like, 30 years later, I still always want to protect my sorority.
Yeah.
You definitely feel that in my school.
So I'm always like, I better not say.
I know.
No, for sure.
It is.
I feel like it's such a special thing.
Like sororities can get like bad.
People can have bad ideas about them.
But also like it was such a great thing for me and such a good time in my life.
And like, even the crazy stories, like I love them.
It just like it makes college that much more memorable.
We had an interesting question when we were preparing.
Okay.
So there's six of us here.
Would anyone say their sorority's password?
publicly. I wouldn't.
Wait, what password?
I didn't have a password.
What do you mean you don't have a password?
Oh, like you say?
I think this is a secret
handshake. The secret word. You don't have a secret
password? No. For what?
Like, to get in the door?
Yeah. To get in this, the chapter room
door. Oh.
So, and like,
we had, we had a knock. We had a
Greek names. So, like, everyone was assigned
a Greek name and you had to say that when you got into
chapter and that's how you, like, got in the door
and you had to do the handshake. Yeah.
Yeah, so I'll tell you my Greek name.
What was your name?
I just put my fingerprint in and then I walked through the door.
Your fingerprint?
The chapter room door.
You had to put your fingerprint in the chapter room door.
Well, our chapter room was our room.
It was like, it's cool.
So two of us who will remain nameless are in the same sorority here.
And we will say the password to each other and give each other the handshake,
but we wouldn't say it to you guys.
Like you wouldn't tell me when we're off air?
No.
Offer.
That's kind of seem.
But I would say it to the other person that was in my story.
No, like, I get that.
If I had one, I would have to keep it sacred.
I get it.
I don't know why you guys don't have one.
I think because technology.
Times have changed, clearly.
I think I have changed.
Okay, Daisy, hit us with the more questions.
Okay, well, here we go.
So I know we've talked a lot in past episodes about how it's expensive to be in a sorority.
Do you guys think sororities are paid?
friends.
Oh my gosh.
Wait, say that again so I can really take that in.
You're paying to have friends?
Do you think sorority in a sorority you are paying to have friends?
No.
What an interesting take.
I wouldn't say so either.
You're paying for the full experience.
You have formals, all these events.
And it's like, I don't know.
My sorority was paying to live there and have food.
Yeah.
You're also paying dues to live in the house.
I think it goes so far beyond having friends.
I don't think that's the reason you're paying.
I wouldn't say it.
I think for me, like my freshman year, at least I wanted to find a community.
And so I felt like, sure, paying for my friends was like an easy way to do that.
But also like living in the house too, like our rent in the house is cheaper than any rent in my college town.
That is so true.
That was like the same with me.
So financially the smarter decision to make.
I feel like so many people have that, have said that same thing.
It's cheaper to live in.
Grace, how much was yours?
Because you were at Ole Miss, which is like a huge school.
I don't exactly.
remember, I'm going to be honest, my parents paid for it, but I'm going to be up front about it.
So like pre, so our, like I said in the other episode, our house flooded my freshman year.
So our old house, the dues were very, like, really low. I think they were like 1900.
Okay.
But then, and that was three meals a day and you use the house like at all hours.
Like you could have it at all. We weren't living there, but to be, to be fed three times a day, which was
way cheaper than the meal plans that you paid for on campus anyway. But then once we got the new
house, I'm pretty sure it was like in the $3,000 per semester. Like if you lived in or was that
no? Still really cheap. Yeah, just to like, yeah, okay, good. I'm glad I'm not. I thought that
was like crazy. I mean, we're going to live for $1,000 a month. That's like really cheap. I think it was
like $400 a month to live at the house. No bills. It was just like $400 flat. And then the three
grand like on top of that. Yeah. Okay, yeah. So it makes more sense to live in. Yeah.
Okay, this kind of leads into our next question.
So are you still friends with all your sisters, everyone?
Yes.
Yes.
And I'm 50, over 50 years old.
And I would say right now I could call 25 people in 10 minutes.
That's amazing.
I'm different.
I'm not.
You're not.
Okay.
Yeah, I have like two maybe super close friends from my sorority still.
I mean, I feel like I could if I was in a bind call any of them.
Not any. That's loose. Not any of them. I would say probably a handful. Yeah. I am not.
That's so interesting. Yeah, we did a calculation the other day. If we threw a party of just like six years of my sorority, we got to 150 people in like literally 10 minutes.
Yeah. That's how I feel.
My, I just got married a couple months ago. And all my bridesmaids were my sorority sisters, including my own blood sister who was then joined my sorority.
and then I had a house party
because there were so many of us
I couldn't have 17 bridesmaids
I was going to be the number and I just felt like that was a little crazy
so I did a house party and the other girls
besides Daisy and like three others
were my sorority sisters
yeah what about you Daisy
me yeah I'm like so at San Diego State
my roommate freshman year Christy
I was in Alpha Phi Phi and we both like
found our groups like within like she had her group
in Pi-Fi. I had my group in Alpha Phi. And then we kind of like morphed everyone together.
So like most of my friends, all my friends like outside of college were an Alpha Phi Phi. And then I have like a
couple friends that I did like stuff at school with. But like for the most part, I'm the closest with
them, I would say. We have that at my school, Kappa, DG, Pi-Fi. And everyone's still friends.
Yeah. Where did you go to school? Berkeley. Okay. So much for being anonymous.
I would, like, not to exploit you, but I have to know.
We should, like, have the logos of the schools, like, pop up in the face.
It's crazy.
This is shocking.
Okay, do girls fight over boys when you're in a sorority?
Yes.
Yeah, 100%.
No?
I never experienced that.
What?
I can say, yes.
I don't know a fight, but it's, like, like, girls, like, I mean, girls can be shady, and they're like,
They're like, oh, you're, like, hanging out with that guy.
Well, like, I'm, like, hooking out with him.
Yes.
I never had that.
We call it, like, claims.
Like, people would make claims on a boy.
Yeah.
And then if another sorority sister, like, even months after those two ended,
if another sorority sister started to date or like that boy.
Yeah.
There's a little dramatic.
Yeah.
I don't know if I find it that dramatic.
Like, I would never, you know,
start things with like a guy that my sorority sister had been with.
Oh, I would.
I don't know.
There's only so many boys.
That's what I was just going to say.
I went to a school that was 60% girls and 40% boys.
So it was slim picket.
You got to fight.
Everybody was fighting for themselves.
But I mean, seriously, like I feel like every week there was a new just drama.
Between girls because it was like, don't kiss someone that your sorority.
sister and kiss, but that's impossible.
You're in college.
Whatever.
Hi there.
This is Josh Clark from the Stuff You Should Know podcast.
If you've been thinking, man alive, I could go for some good true crime podcast episodes,
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I remember being like if older girls in my sorority, if like someone in my pledge class,
like started like talking to their.
And like you come in as a freshman, you don't know anything.
But like say like a girl starts talking to an upperclassman's like ex-boyfriend or something
like that and starts hooking up with them like it's like crazy and it's like you should not do that
like you like and it's almost like then like that friend group like will like not like attack you but
like you know what I mean they're like low down on you because like I said it's been 30 years but
I remember I kissed a boy that my big sister in the sorority dated yeah I don't think she was
too happy about it and now I'm totally still totally friends with her yeah I don't even think if like
we called her right now she'd even be able to name who the boy was yeah i mean i remember because it was
a little bit more dramatic for me we have a friend and she the upperclassman thing she yes i was like
who are we talking about she was like terrified to talk to this guy because an upper classman
i guess they claimed him yeah it's literally how she described it they like were like you are not
going to talk to him he's he's ours and he's older than you and you need to stick
stay in your lane and now they're dating but yeah because like in college it was like no and then
like they got out of college and they're like wait like like what's the only thing that I think
get a little sticky in the sorority very sticky yeah I even extended past college there was
a situation in my sorority that um our president at the time came to college with her high school
boyfriend he also joined a fraternity she went on a
semester travel abroad and while she was gone he hooked up with somebody from our sorority but she
didn't know and they got married very young oh no and she was convinced that she that they lost
a virginity together and like in their marriage she found out that this is giving like tell me lies
you guys seen that yeah found out in their marriage that he had cheated lost his virginity just
somebody else in the same sorority.
I think so virginity is the most important part of that.
Like the cheating, I mean, that's really messed up.
But like that's.
And so that's extended past college.
So it gets, it gets sticky.
Yeah.
Wow.
Scandal.
Okay, let's move on to the next fun.
Are mixers and like pre-parties as wild as movies and TV make them seem?
Oh.
No.
No.
Not like in the movies where.
where, like, people are jumping off the roof and stuff.
I mean, no, people at mine, like, jumped off the roof.
We have some pretty crazy things.
Not the girls the guys would be.
Maybe I feel like the acting is kind of fake,
where it just seems so out of touch.
It's also, like, I don't know about you guys,
but, like, when we would go to, like, fraternity parties
and say it'd be, like, okay, Alpha Phi,
we have a pre-party with Sigap.
Then we would go, like, with to Siget,
but no one ever had solo cups.
Like everyone would drink out of plastic vodka handles
And then have a like 7-up like chaser from like Trader Joe's
And it would be vodka the gods
And everyone would just be slugging it
Out of the same bottle passing it around
And it also haircuts
You remember haircuts?
They would pour both
So you'd like stand in the obvious
And they would dump it into your mouth at the same time
Yeah
I will say I went back to SAE as an old person
You know like during a fraternity part
on a football game day.
Yeah.
And I was actually like disturbed.
I was like, like it was so wild.
And they were doing all that sharing.
And all I could think about was the germs.
Like mono.
Yeah.
Like what am I catching?
And it was so hot.
And there's so many people that I was actually like as an older person was like,
I actually cannot do this.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But I think as a 20 year old, I would have been like, this is amazing.
It's also like you're away from like, you're away from like,
you don't have any rules.
You feel kind of invincible and you can go out and party whenever you want.
And you walk in and it's like, I don't know about you guys, but it was dark.
There were lights.
There were like people who were DJing.
Like honestly, how many frat guys are DJs?
Literally, every fat guys thinks they're inspired.
So bad.
Oh, my God.
These are great questions.
Keep going.
This is good.
Right.
Oh, they get good.
Okay.
Oh, this is, okay.
Do sorority girls actually have to earn invite?
to the best parties.
No.
No.
Well, I'm the social chair
of my sorority.
Oh, so you got it in everywhere.
I'm making sure
that we get the good parties,
but it's also kind of like
as dramatic as it seems,
like I want the entirety of my sorority
to attend these events
so that we can continue having
like a good relationship.
What about a date party?
That's so true.
What about a date party?
Yeah, well, I mean, like,
we have our own.
Yeah, that's kind of like
the frat guys themselves
will like seek out one person.
So it's kind of like, yeah,
if us as a sorority,
we're going to make.
these great friendships or more with these guys, then that's how you can kind of like get
yourself into like a date party. I'm trying to remember like South Seas. Do they still have, yeah, yeah,
so how does that work? Is that essay? That's just a Dardy. So we just, I mean, like, social
charity. A dirty. What's a day party? But like anyone can show up. Like, if that's what the
question is that saying, you can't just get into South Seas. Wait, no. No. No. It's like, for me,
it was like my sorority. So like, alpha fee, like, we could get into like, like, the,
three like frats that like we mainly like hung out with we could go in there but if like another
girl like walked up and they were like not in a sorority or if they were in like a different sorority
and didn't have like a relationship with that frat they'd be like show me or group me
show me that's how you had to prove you were like they would like they would like they would
like I need to hear what you just said show me or show me or group me so it's like do you know what
group me no so it's like an app where like you can add everyone so like if we were all in the same
sorority, I would add all of you guys.
And then we would do like alpha fee, like times like SAE.
And then we'd all be in the same one.
So then if I showed up and I was like, okay, I'm Daisy, I'm an alpha fee, they would
scroll on it to make sure that it's like real and not a screenshot and make sure that it's
you.
And then like if Gracie showed up with me and she wasn't an alpha fee, like say she was like
not in a sorority, they'd be like, no, like she can't come in.
What if I was visiting you?
If you were visiting me, then it's like different than I like put in that I have.
a friend visiting me or honestly
I mean it doesn't sound horrible but like
if you walk up and the guys are like
oh like you're hot like they'll let you in
so how did I get into South Seas because
wasn't there a guest list
I feel like my name was on a list or something
what we do is we have like physical wristbands
and or an app sometimes
but that's just maybe because like now
there's a lot more people that will try and go to
the fraternies and it's not like a if you're
hot or not thing it's like a safety thing
of like there could be people around Berkeley
that are just like lurking trying to get
interprads that like don't go there and that's like a safety concern so now we have like wristbands
and like you have an app too where we can like add people if they're visiting ours was literally
you walk up you show your student ID and you walk in oh wow like their student ID didn't say your
sorority on it right they did not there was no none of that so like everybody but that's for that's for like
sigmanew had um what was there they had like this one yearly big party like there was no no rules for
like anyone could come.
Yeah.
It was the fraternity.
Even guys from other fraternies
would sometimes come.
They had like a friend
that was in Sigma Nu.
They'd be like,
all right,
I'm going to go.
Yeah.
Wow.
But like date parties
where it's just Katie
and just Sigma Nu
or just Katie,
just Sigma Kai.
Then you have to prove it.
But like,
that's crazy.
Yeah.
For us,
just regular parties,
anyone could walk in.
Yeah.
They didn't check a student ID.
They didn't check a group meet.
Nothing.
Like,
if you were a girl,
you could just walk in.
But then like you were saying
with formals or
date parties, then there's a list or there's a wristband that you need to have. But any old
fraternity party, especially a tailgate or something, anyone can get in. Yeah. No, San Diego State,
you got to show you. I don't know what it's like now, but the big city thing, like, I mean,
I was in Oxford, Mississippi. Like, there's nothing there besides the college. So I could kind of see
not being a safety concern, but if you're in, like, a bigger city, you need to, like, control what's
coming in now. But, like, San Diego State is kind of like, it's like not close. Like, if you think of,
like, downtown San Diego and stuff like that.
it's like it's like in its own little kind of world you know what I mean and the only one that like
the only people that try to go to the parties are like college students like for any old people
listening that still don't know what a group me is I'm totally with you because they've explained
it and I still am like it's just a group meeting me yeah it's like text messages it's like group chats
yeah it's a bunch of like a chat like a chat chat like an easy way to start like a text
thread without giving your number kind of yet you can only say it's fine it's fine I'm with you
I don't get anyone over 40s understanding that, but that's fine.
I'm over 30 and not getting it.
Okay.
Okay.
Next question.
Is there ceremonies for things like engagements, etc.?
Is the candle past tradition real or just a rumor?
It is real.
It's real.
Every single week.
a chapter would go like 30 or 40 minutes longer than it should have because we had a candle
pass because there were a lot of ring before spring girls in our sorority.
Wait, what is a candle bass?
Like you get engaged before you graduate.
Oh no.
Wait, no.
This is like actually engaged.
No, this is like they're actually engaged.
So they get engaged.
I'm like to school in the self.
Yeah.
Are they southern together?
Mm-hmm.
So it's like they get engaged but they keep it a secret and then they have a candle and they put
the ring on the candle and they pass it around and you sing a song and then you sing a song and then
at the very end the candle ends up with the bride and it's like oh my gosh we had that they tell
their entire love story for like way too long oh my gosh we only had like three a year so that
is crazy we had one like every we only had one pinning in four years I don't do that oh
wait what is a thing like you're like oh we're dating or is this
And pinning is like you're, it's a step before getting engaged.
So it's the same candle.
And the candle's going around and you don't know who it is.
And then it stops.
I don't remember how there was some sort of singing.
And then that person who's, maybe the friend blows out the candle so the person knows they're getting pinned.
And then all the boys come in in suits.
And then, but it's just a pinning.
I think they give their, it's very old-timey.
They give their fraternity pin to the girl.
Oh.
And then it's like engaged to be engaged.
So do they insane like they're kind of hinting like you're getting engaged soon?
It's like a promise.
Oh, it's like a promise ring.
Honestly, I'm thinking of like frat boys like all of my like frat guy friends who I'm still
friends with love them all to death.
But like they were total frat boys in college.
Like I like you cannot marry any of it.
Yeah.
Maybe it's like they would never do that.
Like they would.
Well, they just like there's no way they possibly could.
they were just like animals
I'm sorry
it's true
there's a school in Minnesota
it's a private school and if you get
engaged before you graduate
you get school free
no
yeah
like I heard of that
that feels made up
yeah it's called Bethel
I'm pretty sure I'm like actually
Google it at the end
give us another question while you
yeah okay let's do
do you think Bama
rushed TikTok made sororities seem more extreme than they really are.
Yeah.
Not for Ole Miss.
Not for Ole Miss.
Well, that makes sense because they're both in the South.
I think like the TikTok, I think like social media has opened up like a whole other aspect
to it where other people can like watch it too.
But even my friends, I remember in our group chat, we like sent like our sorority Alpha Phi
at Sandeoia.
Say like they do all those dances before and they like sent it.
And I was like, all my friends were dancers.
And I was like, you guys.
I'd be that girl with just her arm showing in the back, holding the sign.
And then, like, my friends were like, oh, we'd be in the front dancing, like, eating that shit up.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
So, I don't know.
It's definitely changed.
Yeah.
Over the years.
And we need to get, like, a grandma in here from, you know, when they were in school in the 60s or 70s, because that would be interesting, too.
Imagine showing them one of those TikToks.
They'd be like, what the hell is this?
My girl has become a deal in competition.
Do those.
Yeah.
My girl was in a story in the 60s and she had said to me recently being like,
so what is work week and why do I keep seeing you on the Instagram?
What's happening?
And I'm like, I don't even know what she was doing.
Yeah, we need to do a grandma episode.
We'll do that sometimes soon.
I love grandma's if you want to be on the pod call in.
Yeah.
Next question.
Do sororities secretly keep hotless during rush?
Like, meaning like, do they keep like tabs of like girls that they like want in the sorority?
Of course.
Yes.
Yeah.
I feel like that's no secret.
Yeah.
I think social media plays a part in it.
like we were saying, where they see online a girl that has like it in her bio that she's
going to go to the school. And I feel like they kind of like keep tabs. Yeah. Like someone joins
the Facebook pages and is like scouting. Yeah. Do alumni ever pull strings to control who gets
a bid? Totally. 100%. 100% if they try. Yeah. Definitely. I know other sororities. It was like,
it was kind of crazy. I don't know if it was like this for you. Was Rush Week like super drama
for y'all.
It was a little.
Just like tiring.
So for us like every day there was like a rumor.
There was something about this house was doing this.
This house was doing that.
And I remember alumni being a huge part of one of the rumors.
Actually like every year that this house's alumni was keeping this girl whose grades were below the requirements.
And they or they have these like crazy past things that they've done that they like shouldn't be put.
Yeah.
It was crazy.
guys we have so many more juicy questions that people ask and so come back for the next episode
because we are going to do a part two we didn't even get halfway through the questions so
come back for that and thanks for being here love you guys
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