The Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast - Hey High School Seniors, Rush Starts Now!!
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Welcome to Dirty Rush, The Truth About Sorority Life, with your host, me, Gia Judice, Daisy Kent, and Jennifer Fessler.
Hi guys, welcome back to another episode of Dirty Rush.
I am your host, Jennifer Vesler, joined by your other host, Gia Jude Ice.
Today we have a very special guest.
This friend of ours made history as the very first bachelorette and is basically Indiana
University royalty.
Trista Sutter.
What about things that I hear you can get dropped from a house for doing or not doing?
So I guess like not registering on time, but like, also.
Also, you can't tell people what your top sororities are.
You have to follow every sorority on Instagram.
Gee, is that true?
I do not really recall this when I was rushing,
but they are saying now that you have to follow all of the sororities
prior to rushing.
Otherwise, you will be dropped.
I understand that to an extent,
just to show that you have an open mind
and that you do have interest in all of the sororities
and you're not being selective.
I mean, listen, we didn't have computers back in the day,
so I didn't have to worry about any of this.
Yeah, I really don't think I followed all of the sororities before rushing.
I don't even know if I followed any of them.
I think it was, let me rush and whatever sorority I get in,
then I'll follow you after.
Do you think the part of that for you was because you were already famous and like...
I was going to say that.
Yeah, I mean, I just think they were probably all just vying for you.
They all probably wanted you.
Yeah.
Like I don't think they gave a shit.
You followed them or not.
That's how I would think it went down.
I don't know for sure.
I mean, I still went through the process like anybody else.
But I do.
I'm not going to say that I don't think that had an advantage to it because that would just be naive of me.
Yeah.
I mean, well, you weren't just famous.
You're also Gia.
So, of course they wanted you.
But I mean, you know, I think that like that's, yeah, it has to have.
I remember when, I don't know if I'm allowed to talk about this or not,
but when Antonio, because Rachel and Antonio both went to Delaware,
and Antonio ended up rushing, she ended up joining Rachel's sorority, so Alpha Phi.
But I remember that when she was getting there, they were all just in a,
it was just a whirlwind.
Everybody wanted.
Talking about her.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
So, um, which is nice.
I mean, listen, I don't think we're, I don't, I don't, I'm not going to be naive to it.
I don't think that.
it put us at a disadvantage.
Yeah.
Listen, it's okay.
You have it.
Good.
Guess what?
You've been through enough
being on a reality TV
should show your whole life.
There should be some advantages.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Right.
I'm comfortable with that.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I guess that was the one advantage.
Yeah.
Oh, my God.
So you guys,
what do you guys think?
Does legacy status even matter anymore?
Because I'm hearing mixed things.
It should. I feel like it should. I'm sorry, but if your family has a connection to a sorority, why, because I'm hearing that it's used against you. Why is it used against you? I have heard people say that they don't want to put it on their, on their resume, because before they even get to rush, some girls are set, they're not invited to the sorority for the first day or whatever based on their legacy. Is that?
It's very, it's, it's very tricky.
So with legacy 100%, it should be valued.
And even when I was in Zeta at Rutgers, when I was rushing the new P&Ms, there were many times,
I guess when you put the girls list through nationals or whatever that portal they use,
because now obviously it's technology-based.
So it's a little easier to figure out which girls are legacies or not.
There was a girl who was a legacy of Zeta and she did not get Zeta.
She got dropped like within the first round.
And this had to have been my sorority making a mistake, not realizing that she was a legacy.
So when that does happen, it does get messy because obviously the girl who gets dropped
who knows that she was a legacy, gets upset, and then it's this whole thing.
But after that, odds are this girl doesn't even want to be in the sorority, knowing that they dropped her.
So it's like, I'm good.
But I would say a lot of the times it is a mistake, but it does happen often that sororities are not, I would say careful enough to really seek out who is a legacy.
that is rushing and who is not because a lot of the times girls do get dropped.
Do you think that that's partially because like after, because it used to be so,
so important, right? And it could, it would get you in, right?
Well, yeah, it's basically a token to get you in. Like,
but say my daughter rushes, she should have legacy to Zeta no matter where she goes.
And she should get in no matter what. Right. But what I was going to ask was that,
do you think that after all these years, like people like, well, guess what?
the mother was great, but the daughter not so much.
And now we have to take her.
And there's like a revolt against that.
Like, you know, like legacy.
You don't know what you're getting.
I think people, I'm sure, you know, committees on sororities and I'm sure they have their fair share of saying that.
Like, okay, this girl's a legacy, but I really don't think she fits in with our sorority.
Too bad.
If she wants to be in your sorority, you have to accept her.
Yeah.
that's so right so that's right like I feel halfway through so or I kind of feel like in between
I feel like so when I was rushing if you were a legacy and you made it on your own accord like based
on your personality based on your experiences based on what you've accomplished based on the
potential you had right that if you made it on your own accord to pref night so the very final
night of rush, then if you still were, if you still had that sorority that you were a legacy at
on your list at pref night, then you were in no matter what. So I was a legacy at Caio and I made
it to Cairo Pref night. So if I had chosen Caio, then I could have, then I would have
100% gotten in. Right. But I chose to go Alpha Kai. So I feel like they should at least not
make it so that it's harder for you to get into the sorority because like I'm
like I'm saying I'm hearing that people are are discounted for having that legacy I don't
think they should be discounted but I do still think that they should like mesh with
the sorority that they should show that they're they have a great personality that they're
going to fit in with whatever this sorority is yes and then make it to pref night and if they
make it to preff night than they then they're in you know what i mean yeah i totally agree i agree with that
i think that i wonder if part of this whole legacy thing started because sororities are expensive we know
this right you spend a lot of money and you're i don't know maybe you feel like if you've spent
thousands of dollars you know not just sometimes not just you know during the four years but
you're giving to your sorority let's say you know for years you're you're right you're going or you're
running for whatever it is and
And there's an expectation there, right?
Like I'm giving all this money.
I spent so much money.
I want my daughter in.
So I think that's probably, yeah, hard of it.
It totally makes sense.
I think kind of what you were saying, Trista, like,
if the legacy who is rushing does not want to end up in that sorority and they choose
to not be in that sorority at the end of the day, so be it.
but the sororities should never kick them out before they have the choice to choose.
Yeah, I mean, before they even show who they are as a person and, and like you don't even have
the chance to get to know them, that's what I have a really big problem with.
I just don't understand why sororities don't give legacies a chance to even get to know you
and they cut you before they even meet you.
Yeah, I think that's kind of bullshit too.
Yeah, it doesn't make any sense to me.
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What's up, everyone? I'm Ego Vodom. My next guest, you know from Step Brothers Anchorman, Saturday Night Live, and The Big Money Players Network. It's Will Ferrell.
My dad gave me the best advice ever.
I went and had lunch with him one day, and I was like,
and dad, I think I want to really give this a shot.
I don't know what that means, but I just know the groundlings.
I'm working my way up through, and I know it's a place that come look for up-and-coming talent.
He said, if it was based solely on talent, I wouldn't worry about you, which is really sweet.
Yeah.
He goes, but there's so much luck involved.
And he's like, just give it a shot.
He goes, but if you ever reach a point where you're banging your head against the wall and it doesn't feel fun anymore, it's okay to quit.
If you saw it written down, it would not be an inspiration.
It would not be on a calendar of, you know, the cat.
Just hang in there.
Yeah, it would not be.
Right, it wouldn't be that.
There's a lot of luck.
Listen to thanks dad on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast.
A silver 40 caliber handgun was recovered at the scene.
From I-Heart podcasts and Best Case Studios, this is Worshack, murder at City Hall.
How could this have happened in City Hall?
Somebody tell me that.
July 2003, Councilman James E. Davis arrives at New York City Hall with a guest.
Both men are carrying concealed weapons.
And in less than 30 minutes, both of them will be dead.
Everybody in the chambers ducked.
A shocking public murder.
I scream, get down, get down.
Those are shots.
Those are shots, get down.
A charismatic politician.
You know, he just bent the rules all the time.
I still have a weapon.
And I could shoot you.
And an outsider with a secret.
He alleged he was a victim of flatdown.
That may or may not have been political.
That may have been about sex.
Listen to Roershack, murder at City Hall,
on the IHeart Radio app,
podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts.
So this is apparently a thing as well.
So you have to do certain things if you're going to rush in SEC school, right?
And you have to like do them now, right?
So you have to submit letters of recommendation by May 1st, polish your social resume, heavily prep,
script your P&M video, clean up your socials.
I mean, is SEC such a different thing than other schools?
I mean, I feel like you don't most schools want that at this point or most sororities?
Yeah, because SEC, like, yeah, it lets you like have your parties.
Everything's ran by them.
Yeah.
But I think that it's, it's just a lot more competitive, the whole rush process.
I feel like because of social media, you know, like, or, you know, especially TikToks,
I know there are sororities that have gotten famous off of.
Right, all those right.
They put on, you know, like, it's crazy.
I get.
Right.
Me too.
It is so embarrassing.
even like when Daisy went to go visit.
So like you watch one and then you watch a million.
But I'm watching these 19, 20, 21 year old girls dance in their sorority house.
I'm like, Jennifer, get a life.
Why am I watching one after the other of DG?
What am I doing?
Exactly.
Yeah.
It's nuts.
It is.
It's crazy.
And they have to like perform, you know, to like bring girls in.
Like they want the best of the best.
So they need to actually show, you know, that they are the best of the best.
the best. It's just so competitive in the southern schools. And I think actually that's part of why
these southern schools are so popular because they have put out this, you know, these huge platforms
on TikTok and Instagram. Right. People are drawn in. Even people like you and me who are not rushing
anytime soon. It's a joke. Right. I know. Yeah. It's crazy. Yeah. At sorority rush coach
talks about ways that, well, people like you now, Chista, can support your daughter going through rush.
Not this fall for your girl, but next fall, right?
You have to be her recruitment secretary and track down the alumni, help plan outfits, practice conversations, be there 24-7.
I should be there 24-7 to prep my daughter for God.
You are a shit out of luck.
Yeah, definitely not.
I'm sorry.
They also need to, like, spread their wings and do it on her.
Get that hell out of here.
Connected with resources.
like a rush coach. This is not how, again, this is not how we roll here in the Fessler household.
But, but I guess maybe it's good advice or people to go going to SEC schools or Southern
schools. Yeah, I'm going to be my daughter's secretary. She's my fucking secretary.
Yeah. Her secretary. Yeah, I am my parents, secretary. Yes.
Oh, man. I mean, I will say I probably will do all the things. I'll be your secretary because
I am actually so sad that my kids are going to be.
going to be leaving and I'm going to be an empty nester. So I am going to extend that as long as possible
and I will be there. Blakesley, I will be there for you 24-7. You just call me a two in the morning.
I am not surprised. I am not surprised to hear this. I'm not even a little bit.
Okay. I feel like you're saying it though because you're about to be an empty nestor.
So you want you want to cherish every last moment. I do. Like, I mean, I totally get that.
Yeah. I mean, I get it.
My mom, yeah.
No, like right now, Adriana, she's 16, so she's about to get her license, which is like sickening.
Yes.
But my mom is like her does everything for her.
Adriana says, boom, my mom drops everything.
And she's like, but I want to.
Like, this is my last time driving her around.
Oh, my God.
You know, when you drive your kids to school and I understand what she's saying, that's like your time to bond and talk and catch up.
No, Gia.
But by the way, it's because you have.
had such a special, wonderful, devoted mother.
Trista, you are such a special, devoted, wonderful mother.
Not so much, okay?
I got news for you.
Empty nesting is the greatest.
I'm sorry.
I know that's not what you may believe or think you want to hear.
Empty nesting is a gift.
And by the way, they come back all the time anyway.
I can't get rid of.
I got one upstairs right now.
She's 23.
Yay.
Okay.
So, I hope.
I mean, I don't know.
I was, I'm just not.
You had a bed.
mother Gia and you are.
You're a great mom.
No, stop that.
Anyway.
You're a great mama.
But going back to that SEC thing, I do think the southern schools by far put more pressure.
So, you know, Tristan, your daughter is, you know, she's thinking about going to Bama, right?
Or she is going to Bama.
No.
No, that's my friend.
Yes.
No, no, no.
Oh, you're from my daughter.
Yeah, no.
She's probably going to end up in California.
Oh, okay.
And I don't think that the rush, the Greek system where she'll be is as nearly as intense.
Yeah.
Okay.
Okay.
Awesome.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
No, my friend who's going to Bama and she probably is already in a sorority even though she's not because she's made all these connections.
She's, you know, had lunch.
She is friends with these girls now.
I don't know. It's just, it's just crazy that it happens so early, just so early. Why can't they get through high school and then worry about this stuff when they get to college or at least after they graduate? Like the day after they graduate, fine. But during their high school year, it is just insane to me that they have to worry about that. And honestly, now that we're talking, I'm like, gosh, if Blake's Lee is going to,
to rush. Maybe we should start thinking about stuff now.
That is not our message. And I'm saying that. I know.
It's still. That is not the message. No, it's making Trista nervous. Well, I mean,
but you also have a friend who has a business. So she'll cut you a deal. I'm sure.
I hope so. Yes. Jen, you better, you better help me out. Ask her, have the conversation with her.
If she really feels like she needs that and if you feel like she needs that as a mom,
then okay. But I'm telling you, I really don't think.
it is fully necessary.
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2%. That is the number of people who take the stairs when there is also an escalator available.
I'm Michael Easter, and on my podcast, 2%.
I break down the science of mental toughness, fitness, and building resilience in our strange, modern world.
I'll be speaking with writers, researchers, and other health and fitness experts, and more,
to look past the impractical and way too complex pseudoscience that dominates the wellness industry.
We really believe that seed oils were inherently inflammatory.
We got it wrong.
Many of the problems that we are freaked out about in the world,
are the result of stress.
Put yourself through some hardships,
and you will come out on the other side,
a happier, more fulfilled, healthier person.
Listen to 2%.
That's T-W-O-Persent on the I-Hart Radio app,
Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
What's up, everyone? I'm Ego Vodom.
My next guest, you know from Step Brothers Anchorman,
Saturday Night Live and The Big Money Players Network,
It's Will Farrell
My dad gave me the best advice ever
I went and had lunch with him one day
And I was like
And dad I think I want to really give this a shot
I don't know what that means
But I just know the groundlings
I'm working my way up through
And I know it's a place that come
Look for up and coming talent
He said if it was based solely on talent
I wouldn't worry about you
Which is really sweet
Yeah
He goes but there's so much luck involved
And he's like
Just give it a shot
He goes but if you ever
reach a point where you're banging your head against the wall and it doesn't feel fun anymore,
it's okay to quit. If you saw it written down, it would not be an inspiration. It would not be on
a calendar of, you know, the cat, just hang in there. Yeah, it would not be. Right, it wouldn't be
that. There's a lot of luck. Yeah. Listen to Thanks Dad on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcast,
or wherever you get your podcast. A silver 40 caliber handgun was where you're
covet at the scene.
From I-Heart podcasts and Best Case Studios, this is Rorschach, murder at City Hall.
How could this have happened in City Hall?
Somebody tell me that.
July 2003, Councilman James E. Davis arrives at New York City Hall with a guest.
Both men are carrying concealed weapons.
And in less than 30 minutes, both of them will be dead.
Everybody in the chambers docks.
A shocking public murder.
I scream, get down, get down.
Those are shots.
Those are shots, get down.
A charismatic politician.
You know, he just bent the rules all the time.
I still have a weapon, and I could shoot you.
And an outsider was a secret.
He alleged he was a victim of flatdown.
That may or may not have been political.
That may have been about sex.
Listen to Rorschach, murder at City Hall,
on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
But the other piece, G, you remember because you just did it a few years ago, but like the pressure of senior year, there's so much.
I remember senior year, just the prom dress alone, right?
That is a 24-hour, fucking day job, right?
We already, so she's got prom in like two weeks.
And of course, all of the dresses that they want to order now are all on TikTok, right?
Okay, so these are the only dresses that girls want to order now.
And they all have to say, that's so crazy.
Right.
You don't go to a store.
I'm like, we live in Denver, Colorado. We don't live in Vail anymore. Like, we can go to plenty of stores and look at dresses. And she's like, no, mom, that's not how you do it. You have to like, look, you have to find the dress or whatever. And then as a mom, you have to make sure that these websites are actually legit. You know, that they're not like scamming you out of your money. So we bought this dress. And I think it came from overseas, of course. And then we get it and it doesn't fit. So I have to return it. And, and it. And,
I think I returned it to Kazakhstan or something.
Crazy.
Yeah, and it probably costs you more than the dress to return it.
Right.
Right.
We did just find one, but oh my gosh.
And how about like you have to do the bed, right?
You have to do the freaking and have that.
Nobody.
Oh, the beds are so cute, though.
I love the bed.
Get the hell out of here with this.
No, I love the bed.
One of my friends did that.
Yeah.
You did.
Oh, I'm not going to have great.
Of course.
I mean, all of this stuff you do, right?
So I'm just hoping that that, well, I really don't care now because I'm out of it.
But like for someone like you, Trist, that you have to like hire $5,000 coach.
Maybe it's the, maybe that is the way to go.
I don't know.
Gosh.
Anyway, I don't know.
I just, yeah.
I mean, I'd rather that $5,000 go toward something else, like a trip that we make
memories at, you know, or something like that.
I don't know.
Or a bracelet for me.
Oh, yeah, a bracelet for me.
Anyway, all right.
So what about there are apparently P&M video tips that will help you to stand out.
And if you go to At Sorority Rush Coach, you can find them.
But it says be specific.
Tell your story.
Check your lighting.
Practice.
Show your unique non-academic traits.
I mean.
I mean, okay.
I understand that.
I think recording yourself is a lot more intimidating.
than just having that like person to person connection and in person connection,
I think recording yourself can be intimidating and you're trying to be engaging
and peek somebody's interest through a video.
I think that's definitely a little challenging.
I do agree with the good lighting, you know,
get one of those ring lights that you see all over TikTok and on Amazon.
And then, yeah, you have to tell your story.
I mean, obviously don't go through your whole academic portfolio and be boring because
then that's a snooze fest.
But I would talk about, you know, if you were on the cheer team and what you enjoyed most
and if you were in sports or how involved you were and, you know, maybe tell a funny story.
I think that is my best advice, but I do understand how it can be a little awkward just
trying to, you know, show somebody your personality through a video.
I think in person connection is a lot better.
Yeah.
Did you do a video, Gia?
No.
I so I'm is this a thing like that everyone does because I have not even I didn't even know what this was until right just this
Rachel had to do one oh did she okay I didn't I believe she did I remember well she also it was different things she rushed during COVID but that's probably why definitely had to put something together yeah that's definitely right right so it was different I wonder if that's what started it you know because they had to do videos it could have no but I remember maybe narrowed down like
around or something or some, I don't know.
We went through it about a million times that video.
So I have to admit.
I mean, honestly, that would be like the pressure situation is coming up with a video
where you're not going to be cringy and you're going to be, you know, come across as somebody
who they want to have in their sorority and coming up with something super unique.
It's kind of like the videos that like you guys didn't, but didn't have to do this.
but when I applied to be on the bachelor,
you know, like coming up with a video that these people send in,
they submit to be on reality shows,
it's like coming up with something like that,
that you show who you are,
you showcase your personality in a unique and fun way.
But gosh, the pressure for that too.
But you're right.
Lighting is a girl's best friend.
I always say that.
So make sure that you have really good lighting and a great story.
I agree.
All right, ladies.
So lastly, things that get you drop from sorority recruitment,
bad talking of any of the houses, being mean to any of the girls during rush.
Hallelujah.
I like that one.
Talking about the bees.
I'm thinking that means boys.
Gee, is that boys?
Boys, if you are going out and drinking during rush, that is a big no-no.
Basically, during your entire rush process, it's called dry rush.
Like, that's what you're doing.
You are not going out.
You're rushing in the sorority.
And if that's what you want to do, that's what you want to do.
I wouldn't fool around with any boys that you don't know because odds are they're probably talking to one of your potential sorority sisters.
So I would just not do anything until after you're in the sorority.
Or you can not do anything, period, which is what I told my daughter before she went to go.
Right.
Don't do, don't drink, don't do drugs.
And no boys.
That went over big.
Yes. Oh, I'm sure. I'm sure. I'm sure. I'm sure she listened to her mother. Oh, yeah. She always does.
Whatever I say, it's gospel. For sure. I mean, I think those are probably good. Those are, I don't, I have no problem with that, right?
Yeah. No, great tips for life in general. Just, just whatever you would do. Like, if you're going to do something where I'm standing right next to you and you think that I'm going to be judging you, that's what the girls are doing. So just assume.
A hundred percent. That is the best.
advice ever. Assume your mom is standing right next to you.
Don't do anything of that sort during rush.
Rachel, you hear that?
Yeah.
She never listened to me.
It's working.
Anyway.
All right, ladies.
So listen, that's it for this episode of Dirty Rush.
I loved this episode.
I loved the three of us together.
This is so fun.
Yeah, this is a very natural threesome, I feel like.
And wishing you be the best of us.
luck with blakesly blakesly yeah max is max is actually going to he's a senior so he's graduating
in about a month and so we're trying to figure out what he's going to do i don't think he's going
to be rushing and fraternity rush is a whole different thing that's a whole different podcast yes yes
definitely i will definitely be listening to the podcast if i don't come back and
these come back all the tips for when blakesley wants to rush because honestly the the
rush experience and the Greek life experience was the most special part of my college experience.
Mine too.
Right? Right? I still talk to my girls. Right? You still get together. We still text each other.
We're on a big group text thread. And they are some of the most important people in my life.
So I would love for my daughter to experience it too. It will depend on the college that she goes to.
But, you know, I think for all of us, it's just, it was a special experience.
And that's why we're talking about it.
Yes, exactly.
Exactly.
We want everyone to experience what we did.
Yes.
So, guys, please make sure you follow us on Instagram and TikTok at Dirty Rush Podcast.
So you don't miss new episodes, exclusive clips and more.
We, again, love this episode.
We love you, Trista.
Gia, I love you.
And good luck to you moms out there.
Better you than me.
Thanks for having me. I love it.
Bye, guys.
2%.
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Listen to the girlfriends. Trust me, babe.
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You related to the Phantom at that point.
Yeah, I was definitely the Phantom in that.
That's so funny.
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This week, an interview with OpenAI CEO Sam Altman.
I think society is going to decide that creators of AI products bear a tremendous amount
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An in-depth conversation with a man who's shaping our future.
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