The Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast - Ramona Singer, How an Affair Changed Her Tune

Episode Date: November 13, 2025

It’s Turtle Time! A decade after her divorce, Ramona Singer has learned a thing or two! She’s discussing the rise of “gray divorce”, where to meet men IRL, and how she approached dating after experiencing infidelity. Plus, Ramona tells women the one thing they should never rely on a man for!Email us at: [e-mail] or call us at 844-4-I Do Pod (844-443-6763)Follow I Do, Part 2 on Instagram and TikTokSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Ready to meet someone great, start your love story on Bumble. On an all new episode of IHeartRadio's Las Culturistas, Jennifer Lawrence is dishing. Jennifer Lawrence. Let's go, let's go! From her hilariously awkward run-ins with A-Lister's. I don't know what I was expecting, but he was just like, nice to meet you. To her unfiltered take on beauty treatments. I'm so upset I think the Botox before that.

And a jaw-dropping reveal you won't see coming. I don't know if I can announce this, but I'm just going to. Open your free IHeard radio app. Search Las Culturista and listen to the full podcast now. What up, y'all? It's your boy, Kevin on stage. I want to tell you about my new podcast called Not My Best Moment, where I talk to artists, athletes, entertainers, creators, friends,

people I admire who had massive success about their massive failures. What did they mess up on? What is their heartbreak? And what did they learn from it? I got judged horribly. The judges were like, you're trash. I don't know how you got on the show. Check out Not My Best Moment with me kept on stage on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, YouTube, or wherever you get your podcasts.

And she said, Johnny, the kids didn't come home last night. Along the central Texas planes, teens are dying, suicides that don't make sense, strange accidents, and brutal murders. In what seems to be, a plot ripped straight out of Breaking Bad. drugs, alcohol, trafficking of people. There are people out there that absolutely know what happened. Listen to Paper Ghosts, the Texas Teen Murders, on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, guys. It's your I-do Part 2 celebrity mentor, Jen Fessler, and today I am so excited because I get to share the mic with a legend, an icon in reality TV.

She's in her I-do part-2 era, and I cannot wait to dive in with her today. You guys know her from the Real Houseways of New York. She's the author of Life on the Ramona coaster. It is Ramona Singer. Hi. Jen, I am so excited to be here with you, too. I am so excited. So Ramona and I just, for the listeners. We go back a little ways, right? We've known each other for a bit. Well, I love the fact that you make these great comfortable shoes. F major. Thank you. And I actually got it right. See, I really want to get something right. I know the name, okay? Okay. We know that you get a lot right. But you guys, I just quickly want to just let you know, Ramona, and our listeners. I've been a fan for so many years. It is, and I know we've met before, but this is quite the thrill. So you guys, let's talk to Ramona about everything.

part two, but I'm hoping we could just kind of start with part one. Okay, whatever you'd like to do. Okay, well, I would love to talk, for the audience who doesn't know about, you know, your love and relationship backstory, can you tell us a little bit about how you and your ex-husband Mario met, how long you guys were married? I mean, so many people followed you on the show. What a gorgeous couple. But just tell us a little bit about how you guys met and how it all started.

All right, well, let's say, that was probably what I met him. Let's say, we were married in 1992. So I met him in the late 80s. And that was when you could meet men. Okay, I know today everyone has a problem meeting men. Then you'd meet men like drop fruit, hanging through at the gym. Because no one was wearing this AirPods. Go to the vertical club?

You got it. In fact, every boyfriend I had was from the vertical club. Right. And the wildest thing is, wherever I went to, I'd be an Aspen, a guy would say to me, you're from the vertical club, right? I've been trying to talk to you for the past like three months. You never look at me. And anyway, that's how I met my ex-husband.

You met him at the vertical club? Yes. How about how good am I? But outside. But outside the Vertical Club. So I'm at a hot restaurant called Chaubella. It was like kitchen. It was like the popular place. And he was standing next to me. And I see this good looking guy. And he looks at me. And he says, you work out at the Vertical Club, don't you? I go, yeah. And you wear that little black G string with the green ruffle. Oh, come on. Everyone was wearing G strings then. But with like leggings and tights. And I had a little acid green ruffle. And that caught his eye. My butt. And then what? He just asked you out immediately. Well, then we went out, but I had just broken up with a guy I was engaged with. Oh, wow. And the whole date, I was talking about The Ring, the Ring, the Ring. Never talk about X's on your dates.

I know that now is the rule. Why, it worked. No, it didn't, because we broke up for a year. Wait, you and Mario broke up for a year? Yeah, and then I got engaged to somebody else. I only went out with one date. Hold on. So you went out with Mario.

Okay, we had what? Okay, we had one, God, we had a date and, um, And then he was supposed to take me out that weekend. And it was a Saturday because I'm going to call you. I'm going to take you on my boat, take a change of clothing and blah, blah, blah, blah. So I'm waiting by the phone. And, you know, we didn't have cell phones then. And it's like now 11 o'clock, 12 o'clock.

I go, you know what, that asshole is probably in bed with some other girl. You know, I'm calling him up. And I called him up and he says, oh, I'm not feeling well. I'm just calling bullshit myself to him. And then a few days later, he calls me on my answering machine. And he says, hey, it's Mario. call me and like, you know, how about, hey, it's Mario, I'm sorry to get to see you. I'd like to see you again. And his version was like, that girl never called me to check up on me if I was sick or not.

So he never went out again. And I got engaged to somebody else. And I always see Mario at the gym and we'd flirt. And he said, we should go out. I can't go out with you. I'm engaged. And my fiance doesn't know you. And then the day I broke up with my fiance and I moved back into my apartment, the phone rang. I go, who could be calling me? No one knows I'm here. here. I just found out I'm here. And he said, it's Mario. And I think we should, you know, I'd like to see what your status is. I go, funny, you should ask me. I just broke off my engagement. It's fine. Let's go out. Oh my God. I said, I'm not ready to go out. I love this story. See, I'm sorry, I have this whole thing about playing a little hard to get. I kind of, I mean, some people think don't play

games. But like the way you just described this, like you were not. And he's, I know you listeners, if you watch the show know, they were a gorgeous couple. He's a tall, very handsome man. Yeah. People use a mistake come as an older version of John Kennedy Jr. Oh, I can see that. I can absolutely see that. So, but you like, you were, you were moaned him. You were not kissing his ass. I love it. But then we went out and I broke up with him again. Really? Yeah. And then we got back together again and we got engaged and married. 22 years, right? Yeah. And we had a beautiful marriage until it wasn't. But I would, if I had to do it all over again, I would. If I had to do it all over again, I would. You said that to me. You've said that to me. Um, which I love. Because I've made plenty of mistakes in my life. And I think I would not enjoy doing them over again, but they got me to where I am now. So. You know, worth it, sort of. But anyway, okay, you guys were married 22 years. Tell us a little bit about when you knew it was time to actually, you know, pull the plug. Well, I found out my ex was cheating on me with this horrible girl. But I remember going to my therapist and she said, you have to realize, this is even before I knew he was having an affair, that he's having a midlife crisis.

And I started laughing. She goes, don't laugh. This is a serious thing. And he was. And most of my friends thought, as soon as I found, you know, he was. And most of my friends thought, as soon as I found out, he was cheating on me, I'd be so out the door. But I said, you know, you can't really figure out what someone's going to do if you're not living in their shoes. And I believed in marriage.

I believed in our relationship. I believed he was going through something. And I believe maybe we can work through this. And after one year of trying, I realized I couldn't make it work. I don't know if someone gave me this advice, but I think the best advice is you never leave a situation, whether it's a friendship, a lover, a job, anything you're doing. until you're absolutely sure. Because you don't want to have any regrets. I have to tell you that it's so interesting because I, they say that you know it's right

to get divorced when it just nothing matters. It doesn't matter about the money. You don't give a shit because divorce is hard. You don't care about the money. Not that you certainly care about the kids, but you just feel like, listen, this is something that I absolutely have to do. It's such a trauma. And I don't think I've ever shared with you, Ramona, but I actually was separated.

I also, my husband also had an affair. we were separated for like a year and a half. And like you, I was, you know, I was able to forgive him. I mean, we had this year and a half that was crazy and I kind of made it up. So to it, like I was. I know, I heard of a few flings on your song. Yes, definitely. So, but, but, you know, it's hard.

Divorce is a bitch. It's like losing your arm. I felt like I was losing my arm. Yeah. You know? And when you're in a really good marriage after a while, it's like, it's like a comfortable shoe, you know, it's just comfortable. And I have no family.

You know, and I remember he was pushing for the divorce, really, and I still, you know, and it was just, and then we tried to recognize it. It was tough. It was the toughest thing. And I lost so much weight. I remember visiting my daughter at college. I wasn't telling her that he was having the affair then or anything. And she was, mommy, what's wrong with you? I was emaciated. And I said, I had the flu, you know, and I was covering for him. Yeah. Wow. I mean, it's so funny because I didn't tell my kids either until they were, I mean, I never sat them down and told them, but they kind of figured it out also because I went on Jersey and talked about it. there, but before, I mean, they knew before that. But it's an interesting thing because I always wanted to protect them, you know, and they have a great dad. He's wonderful. And we're back together. So, anyway, it's not about me. Some really good advice.

It doesn't work well to hold onto anger on your ex. I remember when I was going to a therapist, I was convincing my daughter to make up with my ex-husband because she wouldn't forgive him. And my therapist said, who are you? No women do that. They're thrilled when their kids don't want to talk to their spouse. I go, no, she needs to have a relationship. And, you know, it just creates angst and anger and aggravation.

And you know what? We're like best friends now. You know, it's so, it's just, everything you're saying resonates with me. Again, I mean, I, Jeff and I ended up getting back together. But I was so, I think part of it was because even when we were separated, like my daughter would call and, you know, try to badmouth him. Oh, Daddy's doing this. I was like, honey, you dialed the wrong number. Right.

Don't call me to bad mouth Jeff Fessler, okay? He's the bad. And I think that was so great for them. So I love. No, I think it's very important. Yeah. So, okay, I want to talk about something called gray divorce. Have you heard of this? No, I really haven't. So please educate me. Okay. I hadn't heard of either until very recently. Apparently couples are splitting up after long marriages. So like Nicole, Kidman and Keith Urban, right? They were together for like 19 years. And of course, like everything else, they have to give a term to describe it or whatever, saying to describe it. And it's gray divorce. when you have a long-term marriage and you get divorced, like, after around 50. So apparently it's on the rise. And I don't know why that is. Why would you think that? Oh, because they have gray hair, you mean? I know, which actually, it's kind of offensive, right?

Okay, because that usually happens. A lot of people get divorced once the kids go to college. Like, you know, and that's actually what happened with my ex-husband. Once my daughter was going to college, people start reexamining their relationship. Do we have anything in common? I actually, I had dinner with this woman who's a therapist. She said, this couple came in. the man said, I'll stay married to you, but I want to be with other women.

And she didn't want to leave the marriage and leave her life. And she goes, okay, she accepted that. So people, I think we're all living longer. We're married longer. That's actually what, yeah. I mean, I've been reading about great divorce and they say a lot, they talk a lot about the fact that we're living longer. How about people in their 70s are getting divorced together for 30, 40 years?

Correct. Yep. So they say that like this, our demographic, over 50, is actually calling it quits more often, like baby boomers and older adults, like, are three times more likely to be divorced than they were in the 1990s. So, I don't know, it was a study by Bowling Green State University. And the trend of getting divorced after 50 has, whatever, been nicknamed grade divorce, but... Because the kids are probably, I would imagine the statistic that they're saying that kids are in college.

Yeah. And now people are, you know, they're rethinking their life. Okay, my kids are in college. They're taking care of. Is this really what I want for my life? I know for another 30 years. I know people, I know people who are like having affairs. And they were like, well, I'm going to stay with him. That was always, or I heard like friends of mine who are whatever having an affair. And the guy would say, I'm just waiting for the kids to be in college. And then I'm going to leave. There was a lot of that. Right. Sure. Lots of times it didn't happen. But yeah, I think it's, I think it's interesting. So what do you think is one thing that people don't anticipate about marriage? Like, you know, you and Mario, at least as a viewer, you just looked like the perfect. couple. Now we were very male in love. In fact, we were already divorced and during COVID, all my

girlfriends would say to me, okay, you must have been making love to Mario. You must have had sex with him at least once. Because our sexual energy was so intense. I mean, you could see it. You could touch it. Right. We just, our chemistry was great. Right. Right. But I think, you know, what people don't realize in marriage that, you know, a lot of times they get married for, like, say, sexual attraction or whatever it may be, but it's really important. You have to have the same goals and morals in life. You have to think about money the same way. You know, if someone's a big spend or you don't want to spend, that's going to be a problem. You know, you have to have something similar philosophy with raising children.

You have to have common values. If you don't have common values, it's going to really, you know. I always say that because although it doesn't seem like it with you and Mario, but I feel like so often the spark that people talk about, right, that initial attraction and spark.

And never went away. Yeah. Never went away. I mean, at least from what I know and the people I spoke to you, that's very unusual. My therapist told me that. When I first, this is before

I didn't do that in fair, I questioned my marriage when my mother died. And she says, you know, I was only in my, I think I was my early 40, 50s then, maybe late 40s? And so you're thinking about your life and your marriage because your mother died. You think about earlier. She goes, tell me about your sex life.

I go, we have a great sex life. We make love like three, four times a week. She says, are you kidding me? She says, most couples, I stop after two, three years. I go, are you kidding me? So all of a sudden, because I love sex. I love making less. I said, okay, I was sticking with this guy.

Yeah. Yeah. Well, I honestly, like, I think that the part you, when you were talking about having common values as well, that's so important. Do you feel like the common values you had with Mario changed? I mean, obviously the, the attract. The physical traction didn't. Well, my ex-husband, I don't really talk about it much.

First of all, he gets very depressed. And when he gets depressed, he gets a bedridden. And that's very difficult to handle. That's hard. I'm a very positive person. I look at the glass is half full. Right. Because it's half empty.

So I had to spend, he had like clinical depression. Mm-hmm. So I would have to always like, I didn't know when he's coming through the door is going to be happy or sad, you know? Yeah. And that was a lot of pressure on me. Like I had to just always keep him happy. That was tough.

You know, and that happened in our later years of our marriage. not in the beginning. It sounds like though, even at the end, it wasn't, you describe it at least as it really wasn't you. Like you would have gone on like that, you know, I don't know. And he wasn't happy with his career. He never liked his career when we were, he had his own company.

And when I was first married to him, I said, listen, if you don't like what you do, do something else. And then his business was failing and he goes, look, all our friends are so successful and, you know, look at me. I said, well, you know, you like car. So why don't you like buy old cars, refurbish them? and do it. And he's like,

well, I don't know how to do. Well, just figure it out because that's what I would do. That's you. Well, I'm not like you. I don't know how to reinvent myself. So he just wanted to just pack his bags and move to Florida permanently.

And I go, I'm not moving to Florida permanently. This is probably when you're on the show. Yeah. Right? He wanted to just like... Did he like doing the show, by the way? He liked it in the beginning and then he didn't like when I got all the attention.

You know, in the beginning, he'd be the one to take the photo because I never was one to like photos. I don't, you know, people get the wrong idea. They, okay, I loved doing the show it. I enjoyed doing it. I was good at it. And I enjoyed making the money. And it was like something different for me. What I did like, which is like kind of a paradox, I didn't like the attention. I didn't like being written up in the press. I never wanted to sit at the front

of the restaurant. I had people come over to me and give me all that adoration. I didn't like it. Wow. Are you guys, I mean, this. It made me uncomfortable. So I don't know you guys, our listeners, if you're surprised to hear that, but I am very surprised to hear that because your personality, you're such an extrovert. And at least on the show, you were always at the center of everything. You're certainly not a shrinking violet. No, I'm very social. You're a people person.

Right. But I don't like strangers interrupting my conversation with you. And I remember before people did selfies, I remember going to the wine festival in Newport, or no, in Nantucket. And these people come over, can I take a phone? They go, I don't like it. Take it again. I don't like the phone. Can we take it again?

And then thank God for selfies. I'll just take a quick selfie. Or I be in a restaurant. I'd be gracious to take one photo. Then 20 people come over. And I like my life apart. I mean, even my ex-husband said, you know, we have a life with the TV, but we have her life apart. My friends never changed.

I was never, you know, I'm very consistent to whom I am. I looked at as a separate life and as a business. And I didn't, you know, and some people, like, I'll tell her right, and she knows it. Like Jill Zarin, she would, she didn't know how to divide the two. Yeah. Her social life was her, her TV life. She didn't know how to separate the two. Right.

I had a total separation. Yeah, yeah. Like church and state. Like church and state. In the heat of battle, your squad relies on you. Don't let them down. Unlock elite gaming tech at Lenovo.com. Dominate every match with next level speed, seamless streaming, and performance that won't quit.

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What is their heartbreak? And what did they learn from it? I got judged horribly. The judges were like, you're trash. I don't know how you got on the show. Boo, somebody had tomatoes. I'm kidding. But if they had tomatoes, they would have thrown the tomatoes.

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What? Check out not my best moment with me, Kevin on stage on the Iheart radio app, Apple podcast, YouTube, or wherever you get your podcast. Let's get back to the whole second part or your second, right.

Okay. Well, first, tell me what you, learned about yourself going through divorce because we are going to get to our part two. But going through it, do you feel like you discover things about yourself? Did you find an inner strength? Did you feel like... It was the toughest time of my life. I remember like people would like write to me, how are you getting through this? And I say you just take it one step at a time. I would just make sure I'd wake up in the morning, put my sneakers on, put some, you know, workout, close it. And I'd go out and just take a walk. Get out in that fresh air and just do

something physical because that's good for your mind. I would, I would meditate, positive things. I love this Polynesian spa. It's a tape. And, well, I don't know what you call it now. CD, you can get on Spotify. It's the sound of waves and music, no words. Wait, let me write it down. Polynesian spa.

No, it's incredible. I love that. Yeah. Actually, I used it a lot when my ex-husband was very depressed. My girlfriend's laid down, light a candle. And it would just help lighten me up because I'm a person where I take the energy from people. That's why I like being social. That's why I like having friends.

So I call you an empath. You're an empath, sort of. Like, in other words, isn't that, right, where you take somebody else's energy? I don't know. I get energy. I give them energy, too. I mean, my friends say,

what do you mean you can't come to this lunch? What do you mean you can't come to this lunch? You bring the energy. Right. But I bring the energy because they give me the energy to give them the energy. Right. You know? Right.

I mean, my therapist says, well, who cares if your husband's depressed? Just go to another room. I go, no, he's sucking the energy out of me. He's making me depressed because he's depressed, you know? See, that was sort of the opposite. So I think Jeff and I, we lost that spark. but we always had the other parts of our marriage,

the parts that you were describing in terms of similar values and like we were just best friends it was always easy with him and it still is to this day comfortable. It was like breathing, very natural. Yes, it sounds like you guys were so attracted to each other

but there was that sort of chaos. Well, he wanted, you know, as we wanted the same things in the beginning, you know, in New York City, a beautiful apartment, the Southampton House, the social electrifications, but then as he was nearing 60,

he really hated what he was doing and he wasn't feeling good about himself. You know, you can't love someone unless you love yourself first. You can't feel good about somebody else unless you feel good about himself. He wasn't feeling good about himself. And he just wanted to escape and just move to Florida. Right. And I'm like, I'm too young to pack it up.

I think a lot of, a lot of midlife crisis men have the, let's move to Florida thing for whatever reason. But anyway, all right, what advice, Ramona would you give to someone listening who is just like in the thick of it, in the hard part of divorce? Is there anything that you could get it over as fast as you could. Get it over as fast as you can. I know I actually had to give my ex-husband more money than I should have, but I didn't give a shit. Because, you know, so what's an extra half a million, million? I know it sounds. Your mental health is most important.

Because if you drag it out and fight, I mean, I remember his mother gave to me some really gorgeous, gorgeous Bucillotti jewelry. And all of a sudden, he wanted it all back again. And my daughter's, who cares about the jewelry? I don't, just give it to them. Just get divorced. Who would ask for that back? Oh, he was just crazy. So the point is, you just have to just end it.

fast just it's like cut off the band-aid you know because it can you know otherwise it can go on for years and months and the lawyers just make all the money so you're better off just cutting it and making a quick settlement and just move i mean once we decided to get divorced we got divorced in 30 days come on yeah 30 days wow you guys really didn't you had we just wanted to move on we want to waste the money spend hundreds of thousands or millions of dollars on how did you split everything up so quickly no pre-nup i assume no right how did you do that well listen i gave up the building he sold the for a million and a half of that, but I gave it up. A lot of money to give up, my friends.

Yeah, he had more money in his checking it in his savings than I did because I paid all cash for the house in the Hamptons and paid up the mortgage, but he still was, just don't out. I just said, I don't care. I don't care. You've got to move on. You have to move on. I think it's great advice.

I don't know how many of our listeners will take it because money is a thing, but yeah. Well, you know what? As women, we should always have some kind of business on the side. I mean, I always tell my daughter, my mother taught me, you know what? You can marry someone who is just okay. someone richly. If you make your own money, you can marry just someone who's okay. My grandmother, you said it all, be independent. Because back in her day, you know, she, all they did was, not all they did. It was a lot, but they raised the kids. Dinner on the table. She used to say

a meat, potato and a vegetable, how to be on the table by the time you got home, the cleaning. And she was such a brilliant woman, my grandmother, but she didn't have means, you know. And I think that that is the advice that I give my daughter as well. You have to have some independence, whatever it is. And then look at you differently. And that's what my mother told me, because my mother was abused physically and mentally my dad. And I go, why are you with him? She was, I don't. I, you know, I had you.

I never went to college. I had you when I was 19. And what am I going to do? There was no domestic abuse centers. He threatened to quit his job. He threatened to kill her. He threatened all these things. She just promised me, get your education, make your own money.

God forbid your marriage doesn't work out. You have the means to leave. You have financial security. A lot of women don't have that. The men control all the money. You can't let the man control the money. You have to have money in your own account. Yes.

You know, they're a destitute without the guy. And that is a bad place to be. because then the man can take, psychologically, takes advantage of you. If he knows that you're, you're, that you're, that you're, you're in control of yourself financially a little bit. He's not going to be so quick to do nasty things to you. You know what, though? It's psychological. It's psychological.

Not all men are like that, no, of course not. But I see sometimes friends of mine who are going through divorce, who have been through divorce, and the men are like you're going to, if you don't agree to everything I say right now, I'm going to leave you with nothing. Like, this is what it's going to be, I'm going to divide it up. And if you don't want to go along with me and you want to try to get. to get a lawyer and do your whole. And I always say like, no, no, no, like he's not God. There's something called the law. Right. And there's going, you're not going to end up with nothing just because he is telling you that you are. So, I mean, you know, I hate the idea that I know a lot of women, a lot of friends of mine who were just so scared and agreed to things maybe they wouldn't have if they hadn't had that fear. You're absolutely right. Right. So, you know, we both experienced infidelity. But was it hard for you.

you, after that, after Mario, hadn't been faithful to trust guys to get out there, start dating? Like, are you overly cautious now? Is it hard for you still to trust? Well, when we first, when we first got divorced, I really was, I also say to women, you have to have a powerhouse of friends. And I, my girlfriend, I can't believe all these women who are married are inviting you to their house. I got divorced and a woman would invite me to their house with their husband. And my friends just rallied around me, my 50 girlfriends. And they did with their husbands. And I would see them every weekend. And sometimes both people, 10 people, 10 people invite me to dinner.

Go, guess what? I'm having all 20 of you to my house for dinner. And then I hung out a lot with my gay friends and developed more gay friends because at that point, I didn't want to be with a man because I didn't want him to try to kiss me or touch me. And I felt very safe with male men that were gays because they would give me that, you know, attention that we like from a man, but they're not going to do anything. And I just kind of buried myself with close friends.

And then after two years, I started, you know, well, actually I did date a little bit in between. I did. I actually, I met this one man right away that actually forced me getting away from Mario because Mario would always kind of get me back in. And I remember one time he came knocking, he had been away for a few months. And he knocked at the door, honey, I'm home. Just like that. Honey, I'm home. Like in a normal voice. And I'm getting ready to go on a first date with a guy who I fell madly in love with. But unfortunately, he died eight months later. But he helped me get out of my marriage. He signed a $3 million mortgage for me, which enabled me to keep both homes. the Southampton House and the New York City apartment. So thank you. How did you meet him? A setup. Wow. And he was like, you know what?

You got to get out of this divorce. Well, I said, you know, he said he's going to stay in this apartment until I leave. Oh, because that's what he was doing. Always do a global settlement ladies. Don't do a fracturing. Oh, well, let's just sell the apartment first and then we'll figure everything else at first. Later.

No, no. It has to be a global settlement. Never heard that term. Would you explain? A global settlement. Everything. You settle everything. Right.

You know, your, your, uh, Keogos. your investments, your homes, your properties, whatever it may be, all, everything has to be done at one time. He won, like, just sell the apartment first. He was so anxious to sell something and have money, you know? Wow. Right. So, point is, this man signed for this. And, um, I mean, obviously, I was paying for, I didn't need him to sign it, but I didn't really show enough, even though I had, you know, unfortunately, you could have millions in the bank, but if you're not showing huge money and earnings, they're not going to get that. Right. Right. Right. So he loaned So that really saved me and got me away from Maury and broke the cycle.

Wow. And you felt like in terms of intimacy, it sounds like this guy was such a gem. No, because Maury and I is such a strong attraction. You have no idea. We just couldn't stay away from each other. We'd go away, come back, go away, come back. It was like a vicious cycle that wasn't healthy for me. Yeah.

And this man, I think he was really sent from God. No, from my angel. I have an angel up above there who really watches over me and pulled me away from that horrible cycle. And that's what broke my cycle and got me divorced. I met him like in April and I was divorced. by the end of August. Do you want to give us his first name or no? Mark.

Shout out Mark. Yeah. I love Mark. Yeah. I'm sorry that you lost him. All right. So then after that, I met, I was set up with another guy that I went out with for a few months, but then he wanted me to have a baby. Oh, God.

How old were you? A surrogate. He wanted a surrogate. Get the hell out of here. And I said, my daughter just went to college. Right. There's no way. Do you know how much work a child is?

I am not having a baby. So we broke up. And then my girlfriend said, listen, what are you doing? You were married for over 20 years. You had two boyfriends back to back. Went, wow, I have some fun. So then I had two relationships with men that were basically 20 years younger than me. Nice.

Yeah, it was fun. And so, okay, and I know you said at the beginning of this, you enjoy sex, you like sex, which, by the way, P.S., everyone out there listening, that doesn't go away just because you get older. I hate that shit. I want it more now. See that? Well, I can't say that's the same for me, but, you know, I'm a little jealous. Really? Yeah.

Look at how you're looking at me. Do you want to have sex with me? I mean, I never tried. What does Andy call him? Going down the Lilling Pond? Right? Very flirtatious. Wait, Ramona, I can't believe that.

Is it just, is it, can I, you don't have to answer this. But, I mean, for me, not as much. I think a lot of that as the hormones. Well, okay, I've always had a very high sex drive. And then lately I've done, I'm working with a doctor. And he's giving me testosterone and estrogen. Right. And I don't think that's to increase my sex.

The pellets? Yeah, the pellets. Yeah. But I don't think it increased my sex drive. I did it more for like, you know, When you get older, women get like vaginal dryness. Yes. And your walls kind of shrink.

Of course. And intercourse can be painful. Yes. So I kind of did it for that. Right. And just to be more useful. But it helps having that testosterone, right? Yeah.

I mean, I can sleep through the night. Yeah. He's not giving more energy, but I already had a lot of energy. Yes. I already had the high sex drive. So basically it makes me sleep through the night. It's like a youth thing. Easier sex, not as painful, all of that.

Right. Because I used to do the other thing. It's called the Mona Lisa. It's a laser. They put it in vaginally. How? rejuvenate your... Because Lays is the best thing.

I mean, one of the reasons why I look good is I go to Dr. Sobel. Hold on, I have to write it down. Hold on. I'm getting a lot. 2-8-0-60. Ladies, ladies,

write it down. Do you have room today, do you think? Yeah. Ramone, you have to call him for me. Get me in today. I'll get you in. I will. Okay.

So he does like clear and brilliant. So I do it every four months, three times a year. And it makes sure it actually builds college and makes your poor smaller. And it gives you... Just so listeners, do you guys know, I'm staring at this woman.

And, of course, I, Ramona, see you obviously. We've met, we've met before and I see you on social media, but you always assume with social media that there's some kind of a filter. I don't use filters. I don't even know how to use them. Okay. So, and Ramona, guys, I'm not getting paid for this. You look unbelievable.

I mean, I cannot. Is that why that 45-year-old tried to pick me up the other day? Okay. No, he was 40 and he thought I was 45. I was trying to pick him up for my daughter who's 30. He's 40. And he goes, what? What?

I thought you were 45. It's true. It's unbelievable. So when we're off air, you're going to have to make a list for me of every single thing that you do. All right. So, you know, tell us where, though, now. And I think you had, didn't you have a boyfriend for a while? I don't know exactly, but I feel like.

I don't really talk about my boyfriends. And let's not talk about it. No. But I like relationships. Okay. I'm a one-on-one person. I don't like random sex. Okay.

That's not who I am. I rather use my hand. Right. Fair enough. Yeah. I like relationships. I'm into relationships. Okay.

So where do you find quality men in, you know? Not on dating apps. That's for sure. sure. Really? And not with matchmakers, that's for sure. Why? I just meet them out socially. Really? Like what spots in New York? Pardon? Like what kind of spots do you go to New York? Where would you tell our New York listeners to go? Well, I mean, where to go? It's just any, you know, okay, the important thing is, number one, you got to put your phone away, okay? If you're in a restaurant or wherever you are a party, you can't have your phone looking at your phone. I mean, who's going to talk to you looking at a phone, okay? Agreed. You have to make eye contact. You see, you see, just walk into a room and smile. Okay, look, if I walk into a room, I'm like this, or welcome

me like this. And on your phone with your head and your face. Who are you going to talk to? Who do you want to look at? Right. You make eye contact. And then when you go to a restaurant

with a girlfriend, don't go out with six girls or five girls. That's like a pack. No guy's going to approach you as a pack. Okay? They're too intimidated. Yep. Okay?

So you got with one girl. And then you sit at the bar and you order an appetizer and a drink and you know, and you make eye contact. I mean, I advise girls, get there earlier, get there 20 minutes earlier.

Oh, my girlfriend's like a person next to you. Yeah. Sit alone with the bar. Love that. Yep. Yeah. And just be, give out the vibe, just openness and just make a comment. Like the way I got these other guys talking to me at this party, they're all tall. I said, I'm going to guess you're high. I think you're six, boy, because oh my God, you're right. And you're six five because you're right. And that's sort a whole conversation. You just try to pick something from the air that's just, you know, is natural. Love it. Like we do on reality TV. Like we do on reality. Everything about reality TV is natural. So anyway, so what about a first date?

So now you've hooked the guy and he asks you out, How do you get it? What do you think in terms of like, first of all, I can't imagine a guy ever not asking you out on a second date. I don't know if that's ever happened to you. But, although you said Mario first, I don't know. But how do you hook them on the first date if you're interested, obviously? Well, I just think, well, first of all, I think with women, you can't put, when you're going out on a date, don't look at it as a date, okay? Look at you're going out to meet someone to have a good time.

Yep. You need to be relaxed, okay? You have to be relaxed. And whether you hit it off or not, maybe he can become a friend. maybe he knows someone. So just go out with a very natural feeling that you just want to get to know somebody. I say that to everyone all the time. I actually, by the way, I ran a dating service a million years ago as a director.

Remember, it's just lunch? Oh, yes. Yeah, you like I fixed up professionals on lunch dates. Yes, that was a good one. I know. I was director for a while. But I say this to people all the time, especially like with the apps, if people are not you and not going out and meeting people that way and they want to do the apps, do not look at it

like it's going to, oh, this is it. is so important. I'm going to go meet this guy and there has to be a spark. You're not going to, it's probably not going to, it's probably not going to happen. This is probably not your husband. 90%. Right. So you go out just to have a good time. You're meeting someone new. You're shooting the shit.

Maybe he knows someone. Maybe you, or not, occasionally, whatever. Maybe there is the spark. But like, it's not worthless if you don't love each other, if there's not attraction, right? You're out to the average. Everything's a low of average. I mean, I was in sales. Okay.

The more people you call, the more people come in for the appointment, the more people get the appointment, the more people would write an order for your company. It's a law of averages. Okay, you're going to have to give us at least one place in New York, though, because I know that my listeners are going to want to know where to go. Just one. It's just, just go in your local area. Like, are you, right, but do you go, do you sign up for classes?

Are you doing yacht clubs? I mean, anything. No, I do golf and tennis. Okay. Do you meet guys that way? Tennis, not so much, but golf, yes. You can meet men in golf. Golf is good.

I say girls get out there and just take lessons with a pro and, You know, because men are out there. But there were places in New York, I remember back in the day, like, you used to go to Beechay? Remember Beechay? Yeah. You sit at the bar there. Yeah. Well, my girlfriends go to Averra a lot.

Aver is a big place. Aver has a lot of locations. Okay. And it's, you know, they have big bars. Yes. Avra by Rockefeller Center. You have Aver on 6th Street. It's everywhere.

Aver that just opened on, I think, 10th Avenue. It's Greek food, you guys. So they have. So Aver is very social. People like, they're there to talk and mingle because they have huge bars. Any place that has a huge bar is a place to go. go to. Remember the regency bar? Didn't you guys used to go to the regency? Yeah, I still go there. You do? Yeah, and then you have uptown. If you, you know, like, I'm an uptown girl. You have the

crowded bar, like, Elyos. A lot of men go there. I love it there. Steak places are great to go to because it's been like steak. Okay. I just know what the listeners are going to want to know. So sorry, I had to press you on that one. So, all right. So have you ever Ramona been ghosted? I can't even imagine that. But that means when you, when you, somebody just didn't call you back. I don't think so Of course you don't think No I know this one guy Actually I'm thinking of this one guy recently

He's a really fun guy nice guy And I know he said like okay Let's go to dinner Sunday night And I go okay And then I remember I said to Okay so what time are we going to dinner And then he never answered back But then the next week he called me

And then we're still friendly We're just friends We go out as friends It's not like you know There's nothing romantic there So guys I think that's so much about the fact Because you're fun Like I don't even even if the guy

It doesn't necessarily think that you're the one. Of course, he's going to want to go out with you again. Because it's sort of what you said. You're just a positive force. You're funny. You're fun. And ask a lot of questions. Don't talk.

I mean, I do talk a lot, but you have to ask the person you're with questions. People love talking about themselves. That's so true. So, you know, ask them some questions, you know, and be interested in them and getting to know them. Yeah. And it's just a good tool to use, you know, in life to get, you know, to listen to people. Agreed.

I think that's huge, actually. And I think that that's underrated. So, you know, on a first date or whatever it is, I think that's key because I think a lot of women out of nervousness, maybe men too, will just start talking, talking, talking about themselves as opposed to asking the questions and listening. In the heat of battle, your squad relies on you. Don't let them down. Unlock elite gaming tech at Lenovo.com. Dominate every match with next level speed, seamless streaming, and performance that won't quit. Push your gameplay beyond performance with Intel Core Ultra processors for the next era of gaming.

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Drugs, alcohol, trafficking of people. There are people out there that absolutely know what happened. Listen to paper ghosts, the Texas teen murders, on the online. I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. What do you get when you mix 1950s Hollywood, a Cuban musician with a dream, and one of the most iconic sitcoms of all time? You get Desi Arness, a trailblazer, a businessman, a husband, and maybe, most importantly, the first Latino to break prime time wide open.

I'm Wilmer Valderrama, and yes, I grew up watching him, probably just like you and millions of others. But for me, I saw myself in his story. From plening canary cages to this night here in New York, it's a long ways. On the podcast starring Desi Arnaz and Wilmer Valderama, I'll take you in a journey to Desi's life, the moments it has overlapped with mine, how he redefined American television and what that meant for all of us watching from the sidelines,

waiting for a face like hours on screen. This is the story of how one man's spotlight lit the path for so many others and how we carry his legacy today. Listen to starring Desi Arnaz and Wilmer Valdez That's part of the My Cultura podcast network available on the IHartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. What up, y'all? It's your boy, Kevin on stage.

I want to tell you about my new podcast called Not My Best Moment, where I talk to artists, athletes, entertainers, creators, friends, people I admire who had massive success about their massive failures. What did they mess up on? What is their heartbreak? And what did they learn from it? I got judged horribly. The judges were like, you're trash. I don't know how you got on the show. Boo, somebody had tomatoes.

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We failed. But this podcast is about that and how we made it through. So when they sat me down, they were kind of like, we got into the small talk. And they were just like, so what do you got? What ideas? And I was like, oh, no. What? Check out Not My Best Moment with me, Kevin on stage on the Iheart radio app, Apple Podcasts, YouTube, or wherever you get your podcast.

All right, let's talk a little bit about beautiful Avery. What kind of, look at your face just lit up. I love my girl. I know you do. I'm so excited. I'm leaving tomorrow for a wedding in Mexico. She's a bridesmaid of this girl who actually stayed with me during COVID. I took her in because her mom was stuck in New Jersey with her mother, grandmother.

Her dad was stuck in San Diego couldn't, like, you know, fly because of his health issues. So she was all alone, this big apartment condo and Boca on the ocean. And I just took her in as my daughter. And she was with us for three months. Love it. So she's getting married. Yes, I'm going to be with Avery. And Avery has this fabulous business called BAC.

I was there at the, I saw you there because I was there at the launch of that, a batch boss. That was amazing. And I'm so proud of her. She's some people, you know, like major people. And bachelor, bachelor, now she's doing major birthday parts. So it's your 30th birthday, your 40th, or 35th or, you know, girls, trip, guys. So, guys, she helps. So Avery's company plans the party, plans the bachelorette party, right?

Right. But what she does is, it's like soup to nuts because the big thing is, it's like it's the money. You may have a budget that you can afford a thousand night. I may have a budget of only 200 nights. So she'll say, what are you comfortable spending? So she takes out. Yeah. So it's that way, she sends out a questionnaire.

What are you comfortable spending in night? Because, you know, everyone has different budgets. And that's a sensitive question money. And then she collects the money. And then she'll, and she doesn't charge that much. I think she'd be charging more. But then, and then, but it's whatever she charges. It's worth it because she gets discounts at all the hotels and the clubs and whatever he does.

I think it's, that is brilliant. And it's not to stop fun. So she'll create the theme. Tonight's Green with Envy. Tomorrow's pink with passion. Leopard night. She'll have all the services, all the swag, all the decor. She'll arrange the yacht.

Or she'll may say, okay, you know, the bride wants the yacht. But you know what? It's not in the budget for these girls. So you're going to have to have your future husband pay or your parents pay or who someone pay, but they can't, we can't put it in the budget. Right. And then I know, I always, I never experienced what she did until she had her 30th birthday party and rented the largest, least the largest villa in Tulum, which she does for Bachelor

and Bachelor at parties. And I saw her in action. And, you know, the drivers were there. And then the itinerary was there for every day. And there was the chefs and the bartenders and the food. And she stocks of refrigerators, like everyone's favorite drinks and food. And it was just, and listen. Listen, when my daughter gets married, I always say 50 years from now, please, I'll be calling Avery.

But the thing is, I want to know in terms of you and Avery, what advice do you give her? So is she, I don't know if she's single or not right now. She's single. She's single. Okay. So I always say to both my kids, I don't want them to get married until after 30. That was always my, for whatever reason. I just feel like live and learn and get all of that out of your system and being single.

But what advice do you give to Avery? You've been through it. So as far as dating you mean? Yeah, as far as looking for a guy. She's very fussy. She knows exactly what she's looking for. Remember one time, because, Mom, what do you think of the guy I brought home? On paper, he looks great, right, but in person, he's boring. I go, you're right. He was boring. I mean, really handsome, graduated from a top college, top job, blah, blah, tall, good looking, polite, but very, like, flat. Like flat. Yeah. So she knows exactly what she wants, and she's going to get what she wants. So do you give her anything specific in terms of... I tell her don't go out with so many girls. And she said, oh, mom, the other night, I followed your advice. I said at the bar. food with my girlfriend. We met these guys next to us. We all went out after. We did something else after. Then we saw him the next day. We all went out as a group. So she was, you're kind of right, Mom. Yeah. But she loves her

girlfriends even more than I do. So she has, she's girlfriends all over. She has so many girlfriends. You don't tell her like, listen, a guy like this, N-O. Like if he, because I've done that to both my kids, right? Like, like, these are the things to watch out for. Well, I say to her, if a man doesn't like his mother, he's not going, he doesn't like women, so make sure he loves his mother. That's really important. Interesting. Interesting. And I tell She's like me, we like to take control. I said, when you go out in a day, can you let the man take control? Can you be a little more softer?

Like, let them order. Like, I'll have this for my meal and order. Can you order me a glass of white wine, please? I mean, men like to feel like men, you know? Can you help me with this, please? You know, let them feel like a man. Yeah. I'm just curious.

You want to get married again? I don't know. Because I know, you're living your best life. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I like being in a relationship. I like being monogamous. I don't know.

That's a very interesting question. and I don't know how to answer that. I say, never say never. Yeah. So who knows? You'd be open to it. Who knows? Okay.

All right. It's a really good place to be where you don't feel that you have to get married or need to get married. Right. I mean, I'm financially independent. Yep. I already have my children. Yep. My child.

Right. So there's no need for me to get married. Right. Would I like to have a life partner? I'd rather say like a life partner. How's that? A life partner. Love it.

It's like being married without being married. Yeah. Goldie Hahn and Kurt Russell. Absolutely. Right. I'm like a Goldie Hawn. You really are? But I always come around myself more to come on camera, D.S.

All right. So, I can't help, but I have to ask you a little bit about reality TV. I'm not going to ask you about a Roney reboot because I feel like everyone asks you about that. But would you go back to reality TV? For short stints, like, I would not want to film for four months straight because I love my life. And I think that's one of the reasons why I look good because I'm not stressed. No one realizes how difficult reality TV is. It takes a lot of stress.

Yeah. Because I'm so unfiltered and I'm so open with my face expressions. I'm always being, I was always being attacked because you don't attack Ramona and you'll get more screen time and you'll get a reaction. So it was very stressful. It really wasn't being in the press, getting negativity from the press. That wasn't true. That was very painful to me. So now I look good because I'm really happy and I have no stress.

So I would love to do something like a two-week gig, a three-week gig, maybe traders, maybe something else. I don't know, like a short gig, you know. I love doing when I did the ultimate girls trip. That was, like, perfect, five days, four days. That was wonderful. I see it. 100% I see you doing all of that trade, like any kind of a spin-off, ultimate girl's trip. All right.

What about the love hotel? What is it, the love hotel? The one, oh, no, or the Golden Bachelorette, any of that? Well, that's the thing. I don't know, because that forces you to be with men to have a relationship with and you have to start maybe kissing them. And I don't know. And I don't think that's for me.

Yep, yep. I can't believe they never asked you to do Love Hotel, huh? That's not, they know it's not for me. Yeah, not for you. It's a great show. Yes. And I think Luan did do it. She was great at it.

It's just not for me. Right. Is there anything in the works in terms of anything? You never know. You never know. That's my coy girl. So speaking of Roney, I did hear also that there's a group chat that goes on. You guys still have.

Oh, yeah. We're all, we're genuine friends. All. Who's in it? Who's not? We're all in it. Is Bethany in it? Well, no.

Of course Bethany's not in it. Come on. Yes. Bethany is her own. Her own thing. Island. Yeah. It's true.

It's very well said. I mean, Bethany's a lovely girl, but she likes doing Bethany. I think she's a lovely girl, really? What do you want me to say? I don't know. She can be. She can be. She's a lovely, okay.

Friends on the day. I say she's like a cat. You don't know if she's going to scratch your eyes out or put up next to you, you know? Yeah, I don't want to get that close. Anyway, like who is the, of all your former cast members? Who's the last one you spoke to? Because I know people want to know this. Well, no, I speak to Luana a lot.

Luana and I are close because she lives in the Hampton. She lives in New York. You know, she lives in my daughter's building. Oh, okay. And that's like two blocks from me. Oh, that's right. Yeah, I kind of remember I dropped off shoes that you're building once. Yeah, right. Yeah. Yeah. What else can you tell our listeners, my friend, is there, in terms of advice, I'm telling you guys whatever Ramon is doing. Oh, finances, because no one knows about finances. Actually, on my way over, I'm with someone who helps me out with my social media and other things.

And he said, I don't know what to do with my money. I go, you're young. Put it in the SP500. It's all you have to do. Put it with fidelity. They don't have any fees. I said, or if you want to do something a little riskier, take the top five stocks. They made like, like, in the past five years, they went from like, if you put 10,000

in, they went to like 200,000. That's riskier. Or I would do half. Half in the top seven stocks and half in the SMB 500 and put it in fidelity and your And every month put in 200, 100, 100, 300, because that's what you need to do. Write it down. I'm telling you guys, whatever Ramona's doing, she's doing it right. I have a last question for you.

Do you ever think of changing your last name? No. Well, you're Ramona Singer. I feel like you're an icon. There's no reason. I know a lot of women after they get divorced, they put their name back to the maiden name. But no. It's too much work.

Yeah. And also, I have my maiden name is my middle name. So my name is Ramona, Missouri Singer. Okay. Yeah, I can't. I, I'm glad that you never did. I feel like. And it kind of goes well. Ramona Singer versus Ramona Mzor. Romona's singer sounds better. Agreed. I was Jennifer Gutterman, which I just hated. Oh, yeah. I don't like that at all horrible. Gooder face all the way through junior high. Terrible. Yeah, I like Fessler.

Much nicer. Anyway, thank you so much. Thank you so much. We love you. We adore you. Please come back. Absolutely. Because you have a lot of good advice. I feel like we've only sort of scratched the surface. Yes. All right, guys. So, Ramona, it's just, it's been a. It's just, it's been a blast. You are thriving and we're so happy to hear it. As anybody out there started dating again but not having much luck, we are here to help you guys. So call or email us. All the info is in the show notes. Follow us on socials. Make sure you rate and review the podcast. I do part two and IHart podcast where falling in love is the main objective. your squad relies on you.

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