The Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast - S21, #4: Ben’s Parents and Ashley’s Cry for Help

Episode Date: June 13, 2017

Ben’s parents come for a visit and Mama Higgins shares a little TMI. A waitress pulls a fast one on Ashley and slips Luke Pell her number while they’re out together. A caller wants relationship advice…are we sure they’re the ones to be asking?! Plus…How did Ben and Ashley meet? (Hint: It involves a trip to a hotel room) Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is the Ben and Ashley I, almost famous podcast with IHartRadio. Ashley, I have some incredibly special guests with us today. My parents, David and Amy Higgins. Hi. They are sitting here with us. So excited to be around us today. They're here because I am running my very first half marathon. And so being the supportive parents, they are, they are coming out to watch us.

And as they come out to watch us or watch me, I guess run, because Ashley, I don't see you running. Do you run, Ashley? Oh, heck no. When I was in high school was the last time I actually had to run. And let me know if this is too crazy because I've always thought it was my high school, you didn't get an A in gym unless you could run 2.5 miles in 20 minutes. That's insane.

That's like 720. Isn't it? Something like that's 7.30? First off, Ashley, 2.5 miles in 20 minutes is not 7 minutes and 30 seconds. What is it? Like, is it 8 minutes? A little bit over, yes. But I'm running the mile right now.

My goal for this half marathon is to be under two hours. And so I think that's about a 9, a little bit under a 9 minute pace. And how long have you been training for? Oh, I'm just exhausted hearing about it. My whole life. My whole life, actually. been training my whole life for this moment. So my parents came out here today.

And then along with that, my mom, for some reason, another said she's so proud of me. And I think she wants to tell us why. Okay. Ashley, first of all, thanks for letting us hang out today. But I have the best story that I think that you will enjoy and the listeners will enjoy. After last week, listening about all of the viewers or the listeners that we're calling in about Ben's mispronunciation. of words. It dawned on me.

I have like something that is going to make so much sense to everybody now. Okay. And so here's just this quick little story. When Ben was just a toddler and started to talk, it was more gibberish. And it went through that way for many years. Many years. Wait, wait, wait, many years. When did you start talking?

Okay, let me finish. Okay. It's quite complicated. At four years old, like any good mom would do, I sent him to pre-K-4 to get ready for kindergarten. We went through the whole year, and at the pre-K graduation, his preschool teacher called us aside, his father and I,

and said, Mr. Mrs. Higgins, I would really like to have you consider having your son go through pre-K-4 again. I get held back at pre-K. She said he just does. not I have a strong command of the English language. Look at me now. I know. Look at him now.

Like he's just the master of talking. Okay. So we did pre-K-4 again, sent him off to kindergarten. And for the next six years, through his elementary years, he did speech therapy, like twice a week, all through sixth grade. And so I got to laughing after last week, and I'm thinking, there's nothing unusual about him receiving like advice on how to speak because he's done his whole life and I'm so proud of the fact that after all those challenges look at him now yeah that is so funny because Ben is just

known as the best spoken bachelor you know the most well-spoken bachelor and when I think of Ben's radio voice it's just it's wonderful it's like he was made to speak publicly well I think a lot of that comes from all the years of him being so intentional about the way he spoke. That must be it. That's the story my mom wanted to share. So mother and father, thank you for joining us today.

Yeah. I used to say, just for anybody to know, it's, I used to say Tweed, Wabit, you know, anything with an R was a W to me. And so if anybody out there else is struggling, please message me or tweet about

your issues with the English language. and make sure you hashtag Almost Famous Podcast because I would love to read your stories. Wait, Ben, before we go on, I have a question. What is something that, like, you grew up thinking the word was different than it actually is? Like, I used to think it was girl cheese, not grilled cheese because only girls would eat girl cheese, grilled cheese.

Girl cheese. So, maybe especially. Okay. Honestly, I don't know if I ever realized that's not how you say it until, you know, recently, as I said, when people started really pointed out. So I think that's probably a good example of that. Speaking of something especially good, you told us last time that you were going to the new kids on the block concert right after we filmed this podcast with Luke Pell from Jojo's season of The Bachelorette. Chris Stranberg from Caitlin's season The Bachelor who you and I both are really good friends with

and we're still trying to figure out if you maybe are a little bit more than friends this storyline has seemed to exist through the last four weeks of this show and I'm excited to see how this goes down and then Amy Sugarman who is a producer on our show or on this podcast all of you went to the New Kids on the Block concert

in Los Angeles and I'm excited to hear how did this go down? How was it and was Chris showing signs finally of a little bit more than just friends all right well let me start off just talking about my passion my love new kids on the block I have been to over I'm gonna say over 25 new kids on the block concerts within the past eight years

we're getting reactions in the room it's like it's undescribable what happened I don't have words to me or what happens to the whole arena the entire thing is crazy Ashley and her sister know every word to every song every dance move, then the new kids on the block are somewhere between Chippendales and singing and at one point, this sums it up, Jordan from New Kids on the Block saying an entire

song with his creepy tank top pulled up to his neck. Yeah, that is where Jordan loves to one show off his vocals. Like he will never let a show go by where Joey's the only one with a solo. It's like, no, if you have a solo, then I have a soul. And I'm going to be super dramatic about it. I will take off my shirt. I'm going to like wiggle my hips. Like he does the exact same moves for legit the past 28 years of his life. And they're still on point. He looks great.

They sound great. And they're so self-aware. They're very self-aware. They know exactly what they're doing. They know there's an element of silliness to it. But all of us in the crowd of 20,000, they're going nuts. We buy it. We love it.

We are screaming because we are actually feeling, you know, I didn't know whether to smile, laugh, or cover my eyes. By the way, if anybody out there is wondering who the young lady chiming in the back is, that's Amy, who also went to the concert with Ashley, the New Kids on the Block concert. Ashley, I'm, first off, can we slow down for a second? Because you've been to 25 New Kids on the Block shows. Yeah. Oh, just I had no idea they had done that many shows in the last day.

All right. Well, I'm going to give you a little brief synopsis of why I am a 29-year-old new. because I'm the block fan because I kind of missed the ship you know I was I was like really born during their heyday their heyday would have been from like 88 to 91 and um I lived in boston which is where they were from when I was three and I'm still angry at my mom for not taking me to concerts during like their peak at the Boston garden like that would have been the best first concert experience ever at three years old anyway it would have been two oh three yeah yeah So there was a boy band drought during the early to mid-2000s.

Is this real? Oh, boy. In sync had basically, you know, broken up, even though they pretended like it was just a hiatus. And Backstreet was on an actual hiatus. They came back. So my sister and I were watching VH1, and they kept trying to reunite the new kids in the block. But they were like, no, we're not going to reunite for this show. But my sister and I had these songs stuck in her head forever.

and that went from downloading their entire catalog on iTunes to buying every single piece of vintage merchandise on eBay and then... Oh my God, what's happening? Living in our world... You're the one that kept them in business. You're the one that kept them in business. So wait, so wait, I'm going to speed this up,

but I used to live in my own New Kids on the Block world with my sister. During 2004, I would go to high school my junior year with an orange New Kids on the Block lunchbox. and this amazing acid wash jean jacket that I actually got so much attention for the other night at the concert and I lived in my own little world and we never thought we'd ever be able to experience

New Kids on the Block but four years later they reunited and now I've been to 25 concerts since and I'm like and I'm friendly with the band too. We were going to try to find you a date today like that was something we're going to try to do that may be impossible now I think you might have shared a little bit too much. That was crazy.

This is why I'm single because I share too much of everything. Ben, I just like that she said it was a boy band drought. Drought. Like, this is a sad time in Ashley's life. This is not 2008. The markets didn't collapse. Like, Ashley's big moment that changed her life was the boy band drought. Well, you know, in 2008, actually, it's when the drought was replenished with water with the Jonas brothers and the reunite and the reuniting of.

of nuke is on the block. Is it a boy? It was a big year for me. Is it a boy, ban drought currently or no? Well, now that we have been without one direction for over a year, yeah, we're getting, we're going to need water soon. There's that show on ABC that you're

going to be able to watch called Boy Band. I told them, I was like, if I don't have a role in the show, I'm going to be very disappointed in you ABC. Rob Mills, totally, he totally knows what's going on. I just want you know. I just came up with a show idea. Ashley, I am still on board with Ashley I as the next Bachelorette.

Thanks, Ben. I believe, here's where you're going to get really excited. Here's my idea. Every single suitor is a part of a boy band from the late 80s to today. Oh, that's a good show. Wait, I'm getting sweaty. Somebody copyright that really quick because I actually really like that. I have to say, Ben, you know what's really funny is that on, you know, your intro card,

like they have three facts when your blue pictures come out for The Bachelor of the Bachelorette. Wait, can you explain that? Yes, yes, okay. So on Facebook, or at least with my season, on Facebook, when the cast was announced, they had the blue pictures up on, you know, 25, 30 different Instagram posts. And then next to our faces on the blue picture, there's three interesting facts about the person. One of my interesting facts was that I had been to over 25 Jonas Brother concerts. I had a lot of fans immediately though

a lot of girls are like I'm gonna like this Ashley I So let's hear about this new kid on the block Yeah yeah I'm sorry We've lost last track I just wanted to tell you the meaning of new kids We're pretty far deep into your history of boy bands And I think it's time to move now into

Okay How did this concert go? Was it this special for you? How was the people around you Did you and Chris happen to lay one on each other? No so I'm very. very particular about who I bring to these concerts because they are sacred events. So it was like quite something that my sister and I brought Luke and Cupcake and Amy.

I mean, Amy's allowed everywhere. But, you know, Cupcake, a love interest to a boy band concert, didn't really know how I felt about that. And I have to say, like, I'm pretty darn sure that Chris and I are just friends. And I'm pretty sure I'm totally fine with that. I think our chemistry is very friendly. It's not romantic. And I just happen to think that.

I don't know. I really don't know. I just vibe that. I'm like, I have no urge to make out with him. I do have an urge to make out with Luke, though. Oh, well, apparently so did other people at the concert. Apparently, so did others. So get this vet.

I don't know if you've heard this yet. It's very, very funny. So I was staring at Luke. All the girls around us were staring. it, Luke, including our waitress. So we had a little box at the Hollywood Bowl. And she was with us for the night, the waitress. And at the end of the night, during the last round, during the last few songs, she slipped this little note in with, I think, our check. And it said, you're hot. And she handed it to Luke. So then it said, you're hot. My name is this. Here's my number.

Hmm. Really? In front of all of you? Yeah. I thought it was a little, I thought it was a little aggressive. Oh, I would have done it too. I was going to say that seems like a pretty bold move from a female. I want to ask my mom actually this. I want to know what they think. Yeah.

She's from a different time period. Not that long ago, but have you ever, or would you ever pull that move on somebody? Would you ever come up, approach a man and hand him your number if you had no clue who he was and he was around four other women? You know, that's interesting. I was a cocktail waitress and a waitress. in a pretty significant area of this world. And that never crossed my mind. No, it seems like a lot.

I mean, my only thought is that she possibly believed Luke was single because she saw Ashley and Amy and Ashley's sister drooling over new kids on the block the whole time. So they thought there's no way this guy has a chance. Like, he's mine tonight. It was a little rude. Like, how does she know that's not my boyfriend or my husband or yours or something?

I don't know. Well, because none of us are wearing rings. That's why. So I normally am pretty timid when it comes to, like, making moves, if you've ever watched The Bachelor or The Bachelor in Paradise. Like, I can be either very aggressive and obsessive, or I can be really scared and nervous and in a shell. But if I were to see Luke and I was, like, tending to him all night, I would have probably done the exact same thing the waitress did, to be honest. Yeah. And can I throw in something?

because there was one time. You know there's like that misconnections thing on Craigslist and like other apps now? I had a misconnection. Wait, time. Hold up. There's a connection page on Craigslist that you've been a part of? Not that I've been a part of.

There's a page where if you have some sort of romantic connection, whether that's a glance or like a nice conversation, but you didn't ask the person their name or number, you can go and talk about. your experience on this message board on Craigslist and then if that person felt the same way and they thought of the same thing to do, then they go on Craigslist and they find you. What the heck? Ashley, stay away from this stuff. It is becoming clear and clearer to me why Ashley does not have a boy.

Oh my gosh. I bet. I'm going to say. Wait a second now. I have never ever gone on this message board. I'm just aware of it as the other people are in this room are, Amy. Right? Okay. We're nods. All right, but I need to tell you this story. Okay, keep, yep, I'm listening. I'm listening. Okay, so I was at this sandwich place on Melrose. It's called Sack. This was back in October. There was a very beautiful man. He looked like Aladdin. He was so my type. And I would never think, you know, oh, I'm going to like give him my number. But then he started kind of talking to me a little bit, just like a little bit. I had my dog. He had

his dog. So we're just like, what's their name? How old are they? What breed is it? You know, like that. And then I'm texting my sister. I'm like, there's the hottest guy and he's talking to me and I don't know what to do. I don't know what to do. And she's like, I don't know what you do either, you know? So then I, sorry, it's a long story. So then I walk away. I leave the sandwich place without, you know, engaging further. And then she's like, turn around and give me your number. Go and turn around and just say, this is so crazy of you, but you think you're really you think he's cute and this is your number and then you walk away so I sat on the block for like four minutes trying to decide whether or not to turn around and do

this but then I chickened out and I didn't do it but then guess what I did guess what I did I went to the lady the cashier I went back to the sandwich place and I said do you happen to know that guy's name and his name was Gabriel so this is my misconnection Gabriel who lives in West Hollywood and goes to Sackle on Melrose. I thought you were really cute. You had like a puggish dog. And if you're listening to this, I like to meet you. I mean, Ben, how do we help her?

I have a great idea on how we help Ashley. Later on in this episode, I've came up with this master plan that I'm super excited for, right? Okay, we're going to have a segment now called Awkward Ashley. And Awkward Ashley, we'll speak more about. this later is simply this. We're going to try to put Ashley in the most awkward situations every week from here on out to the end of this episode. And the first awkward Ashley segment is going to be about finding Ashley a blind date. So before we get to the awkward Ashley segment where we're going to try to find Ashley a date, we need to give a quick shout out to one of our sponsors and just

tell them thank you because Ashley and I actually both really like this sponsor. The sponsor is zeal. So you can either download the Zeal app, which is the easiest way, or you can go to zeal.com, which is zeal.com to help you get started. Our listeners can get up to $25 off their first massage by using the promo code, almost famous at checkout. Do it. It's worth it. You can get a massage in your house. We both love it. And I wonder if our next caller loves it. So we have a caller in the line, who I believe is a fan of Ashley I and the Bachelor and Bachelorette, Mike, are you out there? Indeed.

I am here. And I'm a Zeal fan too, yes. We all love Zeal. Well, but that's perfect. Okay, Mike, I have to hear something from you. You've probably heard bits and pieces so far of this story that Ashley and Amy, you know, our producer, is so flustered over. They went to a concert this weekend with a guy named Luke Peel. Luke Peel was on The Bachelorette last season with Jojo.

And the waitress at this concert they went to gave Luke. Luke, her number, in front of all the girls, okay? So they're claiming this is in a very aggressive move on the part of the waitress and a little bit disrespectful to the girls around him. What's your thoughts? I mean, frankly, I kind of applaud the waitress. I do, too. Yeah, I don't have any problem with that.

I think that a guy like Luke doesn't come around every day. You do not see that. He's beautiful inside and out, really. He's just like he's walked out of a Nicholas Bark. movie he is the war event he went to west point he went to war he came back he's a cowboy and he's a country singer like that is a nicholas spark's book i'm just breaking it down let's say it was just you and luke you're the only two people at the concert in the box and she did it she wouldn't have done it yeah that's a little rough that would have been a date that would have been that would have looked

like a date yeah she might have still done it maybe give her more credit for that she's really stepping out there i'm so sorry you only live once and can i tell you this story i'm so sorry i have so many when it comes to stuff like this i was on a cruise in january and i was sitting at one of like the karaoke bars and this guy came up to me he gave me a business card or what looked like a business card and it said you won the most beautiful girl in the room award because of this you get a free lunch on me here's my number and email and I actually thought that was super cute did you give him did you text them Amy's got a gross out face so creepy I think it's actually cute I mean I think it's cute because

the guy was nice looking I mean he wasn't a stunner but he was definitely attractive and I was like he was good enough for a free lunch I thought it was kind of a nice way to hit on someone without being super super aggressive I hate it when a guy comes up to me and they kind of like expect that I should want to give them my time of day. Mike, what's your thoughts so far on this season of The Bachelorette? I really haven't watched too much of the show. I've spent more time listening to your guys' podcasts than I have. Oh, you're flattering.

Yeah. You know, so frankly, I watched the show, both of them, the Bachelors and Bachelorette, watch it with the whole family, you know, mainly the daughters, the two daughters that I have, Emma and Lucy. Lucy, is that a dog? That's his daughter. Two daughters. Sorry, my dog's name was Lucy.

If you remember, she was in the clouds in paradise. Well, that's his daughter. Yeah, so I get two daughters that I watch with. And then I have an older son who frowns upon it, me watching it with them. And then I don't think my wife's very pleased with me watching it either, but Together, you know, we're, we're into this. We watch it. I think there's a lot of teaching moments in the show, frankly.

A lot of dads have told me this. Yeah. Please explain. Let me put it to, I like to be a little bit more optimistic and positive. So, like, I look at Ben. I, you know, it's like I thought Ben, in his shows, I thought he was a very real, honest person. And I thought that was, you know, so you're sitting with your daughters. It's like that's the type of person that you should look after.

You should go after somebody like that. You know, kind of what you see is what you get. And then if you see somebody, you know, creepy or a dumpster fire, you know, you can sit here and say that's not something we want to seek out. You know, there might be some attractive he or she may be good looking, but you go a little deeper, you know, run away type of thing. And so that's kind of the way we look at the show. I'm a big fan of dumpster fires, and there certainly are their fair share of dumps or fires on the show. But I also think that there's a lot of good things you can get out of it, which I try to focus on, especially, you know, with the younger daughters. Definitely.

How old are your daughters? Well, Ashley met him the other day. They're so cute. It's 16 and 14. Okay, so yeah, they're perfect age to watch. About 14, I would say, is the most, when I talk to people, is the age they pretty start. They start watching this show. It's about 14 years old.

I think that's when Chris Harrison started letting his daughter actually watch them. Yeah. So they, I mean, they were, they had a really good time. They all, as I mentioned, they all got their deal massages. My wife was there. And there was a couple other, Evan was there, and Chase was there at this viewing party in Arenda. It was very nice place. Jason Evan and Carly and then Lace.

All these bachelor people, former and bachelor and bachelor and bachelor. So anyway, it was the family had a really nice time. That's awesome. You know, I think it's always, I admire somebody like you who can admit, hey, I watch this show because a lot of times I get this reaction from guys. They'll come up to me like, hey, man, can I get a picture for my girlfriend or wife? I don't really watch the show. And then right when the picture's done, it's always the same question. So, like, is it really that real?

Like, did you really like that, girl? It's like, no, you've watched a show too. So I admire you for admitting you like it. Or maybe not even like it, but watch it. I do like it. And then you talk to your daughters about it. You use it as a platform to speak about topics, which I think it does allow that.

Like you said, you know, you can speak about topics like sex and drugs and, you know, dealing with somebody that maybe doesn't exactly treat a woman or somebody that doesn't treat a man correct. you can bring that up based on it being shown on the show. That's why I like you, Ben. You're a straight shooter. If I had a daughter, I'd be wanting her to watch a guy like Ben and then say, like, that's the kind of guy you want to find.

Yeah. This segment is not about me, guys. This segment's about Mike and his amazing parenting skills. Mike, thank you for joining us today. Thanks for telling us about the way you. you watch a show, please tell both your daughters that they have a great dad. Thank you. And when you guys have kids 15 years down the road, you give Uncle Mike a call back and

I'll give you some more advice. Well, I definitely can't wait 15 years. I'm going to freeze my eggs next year. Okay, sorry. Hey, thanks, Mike. Bye. So, see, Mike. Thank you.

So Ashley asking Mike if his daughter, if Lucy, if Lucy, if Lucy, if Lucy, was his dog is the perfect example of why we're having a segment now called Awkward Ashley Jew the music and here's this week's segment okay so we've talked over and over and over again

about Ashley's love life we have talked about former Bachelor contestants that she's been so attracted to from Jared to Chris Dramburg to Luke Pell now we can continue to go on that I am such a desperate bitch no no no no no that's not what we're saying we're actually we're actually going to help you out here

actually i think so we've set it up today where we have callers who are on the line now at least i hope a couple callers called in um to set you up with somebody they know on a blind date that will happen this week i'm hoping these dates go really well and that they're never awkward but i know there's some viewers out there that maybe have a little darkness in their heart And they're hoping next week, you share a story of complete awkwardness. So we do have our first caller. We have Marissa and McKinsey online four. Marissa and McKinsey, are you out there?

We are here. Hi. Hi, guys. Hi, Ashley. How are you? Good. How are you? So good.

We are so excited to talk to you. Oh, my God. This is insane. And Ben's there too. Hi, Ben. Hey, hey, everybody. Okay, so let's just dive into this. We need to set Ashley up, don't we?

Like, she's too good to be single right now because she desires to find a man. She desires to be in relationship right now. So Marissa McKenzie, you have somebody in mind, correct? We do, yes. Please don't be like, he's cute, we promise. And then I look at his Instagram, and then I have to be like, oh, yeah, he's cute. And I'm really just lying to you.

No, no, no. He is the cutest. Yeah, he's a model. Oh, all right. Keep talking. It's not Luke Pell, is it? No, Luke Pell. Yeah, unfortunately, we don't know who that.

We never really met him. We almost met him. He was at the View House the other day to watch The Bachelor. When they do a viewing party, we almost went to meet him, but we got two tires. All right, so who do you have in mind here? The boy we think that you should be set up with. His name is Seneca. Seneca.

It's Marissa's brother. Okay. He looks like Aladdin. And I know that you like that because you have the jazz. Thanks. So right now he's getting his master's in musical performance. He's a professional opera singer. Wow.

Yeah, he has a year left. He's in Italy, but he's going to be back this month. So, I mean, that's kind of, I don't know, what else do you want to know about? Is he Italian? No, he's not Italian. We're half white, half Mexican. Oh, my God. I'm, like, really into Mexicans.

Yeah. That's my type I was one time told I was fetishing them So it's like not appropriate to say But like just want to let you know That like my track record includes Ashley this could be your future daughter-in-law Or sister-in-law

This could be your future sister-in-law And you're telling her that you're fetishing over Oh my God, cut it Okay so Please tell me his Instagram where is he live? So right now he is... Well, he lives in Italy right now,

but where is he going to live when he comes back to America? So he has one year left. He's going to be in Houston and then he comes back to Colorado. Oh, my God. So when I visit Ben, I can go see him.

Exactly. So he has no set plans after grad school, like where he's going to go, wherever his talent takes him. So that's kind of all up in the year. So let's lock his love life down with you first.

Okay. How old is he? He is going to be 27th this year. Okay. That's doable. I'm into it. So what's a sign? Oh, God.

It's January 18th. I don't know. I can't follow a whole zodiac thing. Would he have a problem with the virgin thing? No. No, I can't. I can't. He would not be a set.

He would have set. Okay. Yeah. Good. Okay. So here's the deal. We have Cynica, who is cultured, good looking, and talented as our first candidate. Ashley, I think you're going to get, like,

very hot and bothered here, and you're going to keep asking them questions because I think Seneca sounds really great. I think so, too. But we have other callers in a line to try to set you up with some people. Like, this isn't just first caller, let's go. Tweet me his name and then we'll DM. Okay, I'll tweet you right now. Okay, thank you.

Hey, make sure you hashtag Almost Famous Podcast on there too, okay? Okay, no problem. You guys are the best. I'm so excited that I may have found my husband. And I can't believe that we're doing an Ashley I is the Bachelor edition on the Almost Sanis podcast. I'm into this. Yes. This is great. Okay. You can't see your sisters-in-law. Yeah. See you soon.

All right. Bye. See you all. Okay. Now, Ashley, we have to keep these a little bit shorter than we have been so far. I know you're excited, but we have a lot of callers, okay? We're going to have a Joe Rogan podcast, or it's four hours every day. Okay, so just pull it back a little bit, Ashley. We have Norie on line six. Okay. Norri, are you out there? Bye. Hi.

Oh, my God. This is so exciting. Well, we're excited to have you. Okay, I'm going to let Ashley take over here. She, you are trying to set Ashley up with somebody. You two need to talk it out for a little bit. I'll try them in when I feel like it's appropriate to move on because as we've figured out so far, Ashley gets very excited about the idea of being set up on a date.

Okay, so I want to know the guy's name, his age, and three interesting facts. Okay, well, I think you know him and you. definitely hung out with him, so I don't think I need to give you the fast. Wait, wait, do you know him personally? No, I wish. No. Who is it? Well, then how can you set me up if you don't know him personally?

Well, I mean, like, I've seen, like, your chemistry with him on screen, so I just feel like it could work. All right, go for it. Crisk, a.k.k.K. Cupcake. Oh, well, we were just talking about him. We're trying to get away from him right now. We're moving on. I feel like when some I don't know I feel like you guys have this tension and every time you guys are on TV it's like it's like I feel like he's just confused are you giving him like the wrong signal or something I don't think so I think he's just confused by his own self so when you guys hang out like does he not do not flirt with you or no he's really flirty but he's really flirty but like I really don't think I like him either like that like that really yeah I wish because I I really like Cupcake and I really like Ashley.

I wish she could work out. It doesn't sound like she's that into it and he doesn't sound like he's that into it. But, Noi, we're going to keep this in mind. But thank you. Yeah, okay. Thank you for calling in. Thank you so much. So after all this setting up and after going on all these dates, I'm going to need a massage.

It's going to be so stressful. I was telling my sister yesterday before I actually went another date. And you guys, I don't go on that many dates for some reason. ever since this podcast started I've been having a lot of situations to talk about but that's not normally the case anyway so yesterday I'm like going out the way

yesterday I'm like out the door on the way to another date and I said to my sister I go I'm going to go meet a stranger right now so that I don't die alone like I'm going to go talk to somebody for an hour in the sake of getting married at

some point and I'm like this is really stressful it's not fun fun like just it's not fun to go talk to a stranger and have four small talk so i'm going to reward myself with a zeal massage after this like i'm not even joking ben if you set me up with these guys and i go on a couple days next week i'm setting myself up for zeal massage at the end of the week to just totally decompress well maybe we'll find a a zeal masseuse to be your next date how good is that you get two and one calling all massage therapists that want to date me it's kind creepy that they'd know where I live though

so we've told you many times so far and we will admit they are a sponsor this podcast but they're a sponsor because we appreciate them and like what they do so much so we've told you about Zeal again it's Z-E-E-L dot com or you can download the app on your iPhone or

Android device and it gets even better than that right so if you sign up for a Zeal Massage membership you get 20% off all massages plus a free massage table and sheet set that's a $380 value yours free if use the promo code almost famous all right actually we have a couple callers on the line with just some general questions for us our first caller is on line 9 Johnston Johnston are you out there hey so my question was how

you and Ben met like what function when it was and then how you guys became close strength after. Oh, I remember vividly when I bet Ben. But, Johnson, your phone sucks, so we're going to hang up on you while we answer that question. Okay, I'm sorry. No, Johnson, hey, Johnson, thanks for calling in. Yeah, thanks for taking my call.

It's so good to talk to you. It's good to talk to you. Listen to the next podcast and you'll hear your answer because he won't know until then. Well, I was at Mentel All following my taping. of my first season of Bachelor in Paradise. It was going to be the day that I saw Jared for the first time since leaving him in Paradise.

And I was very nervous to meet Ben and Jared because, well, Jared, you know, that was going to be awkward. And Ben, because I thought he was the other most wonderful person on Caitlin's season. And we just talked a little bit at the party. And then he came back to my hotel room with 10 others. And then we just talked for a little while there. We had like a little after party in my hotel room until like three in the morning. It was fun.

I remember that night because I learned something for the very first time. What was that? So when I walked into your hotel room, you all were so incredibly nice to us, right? We were all kind of shell-shocked. We were just getting off a mental all. None of us had really been a part of this Bachelor family yet. We really didn't know what the world was going to offer. and you invited us back

and it was a great time but I remember something sitting on the floor in your hotel room that totally threw me off and this was a box it was a box full of makeup I've never seen anything like this

can you please explain exactly what that was because I'm not saying it's abnormal now I'm learning that that exists and that you have to travel with certain necessities when it comes to makeup and lotions and product but your box has like lights it's a whole get up yeah people saw it on paradise and i got so many tweets and emails about this box i don't remember the site i got it from but they

were very sweet and sent it to me because i reached out to a couple makeup box companies before paradise and i said hey the lighting in the bachelor mansion was the very worst plus all the girls are fighting over mirrors in the mansion because there's really only like five mirrors, right? So I said in paradise I'd love to avoid this problem and have my own mirrors in lights

and something to carry all of my makeup in for all of my different paradise looks. And they sent me in this wonderful box and yeah, my whole collection's in it. It's like a vanity box. It's you open it up and then it folds out with all your makeup. It is a suitcase.

It looks like, carry-on suitcase. And it's a really professional makeup artist box. And then the top flips up and it has a mirror and six lights. It's wonderful. It's great for traveling. No, it's great. So anyways, that was my first interaction with Ashley.

Ever since then we've been friends. We've ran into each other off and on then at different events or when I've been in L.A. And every time Ashley has, and I said this on the first episode, done nothing but be incredible. incredibly sweet to me, make me feel better about myself than I deserve. And so it only made sense for us to sit down and talk like this on a podcast. And really, that's where our relationship exists. And it's still growing. I want everybody know that Ashley and I are still going to know each other.

It's funny and fun talking to her about her dating life, about, you know, her sister and family and about her sweet dog that's now up in the clouds. Oh, we have another. Because I'm learning all these things we go. Yeah. So speaking of, Ashley, we need to team up here. We got a big caller coming in, and it's going to take both of our efforts. So I'm going to let you handle this at first because you always seem to give better advice than I would.

No. But we have Lara from Philly on line 7, and she has a question for us that I think we'll both have to really think through. So, Larry, you out there? Hi, yes I am. How are you guys? Hey, we're great. How are you? I'm okay.

Oh, you're okay. Yeah, I'm okay. How are you? Like, what's going on? So I've been dating a guy for a little bit over four years now. We met in college freshman year and have been together ever since. So I just, I don't know if the fire is out or what. I don't know. He's my best friend. You know, I love him as a friend. I feel like more than a boyfriend at this point. And I just can't tell if it, you know, I'm in law school. So I'm busy. I'm in my first year right now. I just finished and so I don't know if maybe the last year of being super busy has just made my you know attention not be right to him and so I lost some of the chemistry or maybe we really are just kind of lining down and I don't know what you know what to do or how to think about it and I'm

just so confused and you guys are like amazing so you guys I want your advice oh man this sounds like a question better suited for Ben to answer you think okay well Well, I can give it a good shot. Okay. So here's the deal. First, let me lay out some things that you already know. And I know our listeners already know. Relationships start out, and there's this kind of euphoric feeling, right?

Everybody's very excited. It's new. You're learning things about each other. You're still kind of like trying to impress each other. You don't want to, you know, embarrass yourself in front of the other person yet. And that's a really fun time. I'm not going to claim it's the best time of the relationship, but it's a really fun time because everything's new.

Right, the honeymoon period, kind of. It's the honeymoon period, exactly. Over time, it's natural for those feelings to kind of fade. And not that they ever completely go away, but the euphoric feeling, the honeymoon feeling, the newness does go away. And don't be scared of that. Don't run from the idea that, oh, I'm just getting comfortable here.

That could be okay. I think that I'm past the comfort because I have thought about that, and I feel like maybe like three years in, I was like, okay, obviously, you know, we're comfortable and this is just it. The honeymoon period's over, but at this point, I almost don't even know if I, like, am sexually attracted to him anymore. Oh, you guys are done. You're done. Our sex life is, we barely have sex more. Be completely honest. I feel like I find myself, like, I would obviously know.

never cheat on him or talk to another guy, but I find my eye wandering more, which has never happened in my life. Oh, my gosh. And I, so I feel like I know the answer, but I'm scared of the answer because, you know, you obviously can't be friends with an ex, you know, I always run away. But I don't know. I'm super confused, so I don't know how to, you know, he would be, I don't want to hurt him either, but I guess staying in too long is hurting him also.

Is this your first serious relationship? yeah yeah i mean i'm sure just the thought of having to deal with a breakup and having to initiate it is probably very painful for you yeah and like what ben was saying you know biologically there's like something in our system that after two years the relationship that passion has to cool off or then like people society just wouldn't be functional right because we'd all be like running around with like those hard eye emojis like all the time right but it sounds like for you it runs a lot deeper than that it's yeah yeah yeah so ashley i think lara if you don't mind uh you haven't heard this yet but we have some special guest with

ashley and i today my parents who have been married for 36 years oh great so they've been listening and and i think i'm going to allow both of them to just to give their short advice to you right so if they've been married for 36 years they've been through this so i'm going to start with my dad Dave, Dave, do you have any advice for Lara in this situation? You know, the love, whatever you had initially, I assume it's still there because I know each year for 36 years between my wife and I, it has continued to get deeper and deeper and deeper. You'll get there. Right. Yeah, so I think, you know, I've seen it with them.

Every year they invest in each other more in a different way, that you fore. feeling might not exist anymore, right? That newness doesn't exist, but the depth of it continues. So mom, what's your, what's your thoughts? Well, it's interesting that when Laura was saying that, you know, their best friends and the honeymoon part is over, I remember probably midway through our 36 years. I remember the night vividly, we were getting ready to go somewhere and I stopped and I looked your dad and I said you know what we have got to quit being just best friends we need to get back to being lovers yeah we are we are just really great friends we like to hang out we like to do the same things but we aren't lovers anymore and not that like there wasn't any sex you know

sexual chemistry you can say that mom that's weird and awkward for everybody but you can say it yes but we had to try harder at it we had to get you know we had to to spice it up a bit or you know right and because it does you do you get comfortable you get you do you like the person that you kind of uh just prefer to hang out with you know and right you do lose some of that the hot steamy so you kind of have to be then intentional about it yeah so i mean for for you know you're still dating this guy right right yeah we're together yeah you're still dating you're in this boyfriend girlfriend part of the relationship where there's is you're in still the exploratory stage.

Okay, so there is a pressure. We did live together, though, for two and a half years in college. Like, just us, no roommates. Like, I feel like I've already been married to him. And then when we graduated college, I went to law school, and he went home. So we were long distance for a year, and now we're here. So I feel like because we genuinely lived together, I mean, we were in college living together, but we had an apartment, you know, just us for two and a half years.

And, you know, I feel like we've already been through so many stages of relationships that 24-year-olds don't always go through that I, I know, you know, I'm debating, like your mom said, do I need to just put more effort in and try again and, like, make the time to make some of that fire come back? Or is it really just done? Because I just, and I don't want to drag it out longer and it's a mess. Girl. If you're not missing him and you're living further apart, you just shouldn't be. with him anymore. Like my mom and dad. Ashley's ready to break up with your boyfriend for you. I'm sorry. It's just like my mom. Can you break up with him for me? I look there to like support me. Like we need to do it together. Okay. I can, I don't know. I've never broken up with anybody either. Well, hey, Lara, we really appreciate your call. I think the before we move on here, um, the best question that I've ever been asked when it comes to situations like this, because they're so confusing and sticky is can you picture your life without him? And if you can, and that seems to kind of either release a burden or if being without him adds a burden to your life.

I think that's where you start. And so that would be my only advice is ask yourself that question. Lara, thank you for calling. Thank you for your honesty. I hope my parents and Ashley and I helped you a little bit. And if we didn't, don't tell anybody and still listen to the podcast. We need you, right? I'll be like they were the best, even though they weren't.

But you were and your parents are amazing. I love you guys so much. Ashley, listen to your I don't get it all the time. I love you all. Thank you for your time, and I appreciate your comment. Make sure to tweet at us, and you can DM us if you have any further discussions you want to have. Oh, I definitely will. We can catch up after the breakup if that happens.

Sounds good and bad and sad, but yes. Not a happy time, but it happens. Okay, thanks so much. We wish you the best. Thank you. Bye. Bye. So, you know, I think a lot of that touched the line of awkward a little bit.

I got to hear my mom talk about the hot and steamy. Thank you for joining us today. But before we go, we got to thank our sponsor, Zeal. We've brought them up before. We'll bring them up again. They're helping us out with this podcast, and they're helping us out with the back massages. I guess feet massages, leg massages, whatever you need.

So download the Zeal app on your iPhone or Android or go to zeal.com, Z-E-E-L.com. There's no initiation fee to join the membership. Just a great additional savings on top of $25 discount. You're going to get, when you use the promo code, almost famous. So go to Zeal, Z-E-E-L.com, or download the Zeal app. And we are talking to a girl next week who really, really is in need for a zeal massage. I think we should actually send a free one her way.

So her name is Olivia, and she's from your season. She was also known as the villain of your season, which is really just BS, in my opinion. But this girl was dating Derek from Jojo season of The Bachelorette. And he was just announced this week as one of the original cast members of Bachelor in Paradise this season, the one that's currently filming. And he broke up with her for a very interesting reason. But you're going to have to find out what that reason is when she joins us on next week's Almost Famous Podcast. Ooh, I can't wait. Yep.

So everybody, thank you for listening. This has been the Almost Famous Podcast on IHurt Radio. I've been Ben and I've been Ashley See ya Talk to you soon Follow the Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcasts on IHeartRadio Or subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts