The Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast - S5 #4 Bachelor Couples and Annual Sass-holders

Episode Date: April 16, 2018

This week, Ben and Ashley hear from a previously unknown relationship success story from Bachelor Nation. They get down to the real reasons why Arie and Lauren were meeting with Dr. V from Marriage Boot Camp, by calling up Dr. V herself! And shots fired between Amanda Stanton and Robby Hayes! Ben and Ashley are here to break down the public Disneyland drama and Robby’s creative compliment.  Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is the Ben and Ashley I almost famous podcast with IHartRadio. You know, it's weird, Ashley. Every time I hear the inserts or a podcast, I get a little hype. I know, right? I'm pretty hype, too. I think it's actually a very important aspect of a podcast to have a little theme of the beginning that gets you really excited. I get really excited when I hear Krista Leah's start theme. I get really excited.

I'm like, yeah, we're going to go in for it. We're going to do it. He's a comedian. He's a comedian. He's the best podcast ever. Oh, really? Well, I mean, well, besides ours, of course. It brings me back to high school when it was Friday night light. It was a little chilly out.

The fall weather was hitting, and the eye of the tiger would come over the stadium, and I'd run out ready for the game. That's kind of how I feel now for the Almost Famous Podcast. Everybody out there listening, Ashley and I want to tell you hello. We've got a very special podcast for you. uh one uh that i would look i'm kind of looking at what we're going to talk about and it's us kind of just covering up a bunch of mistakes that we've made last week by by not talking about some couples uh ben why do you have to keep everything so on point because of course you ask that you talk

about how you're running out of the locker room and now i'm like what would be your hit your batting song if you were a baseball player today you like move everything so along quickly and i'm like Wait, I had a great question. Oh, Ashley, that's why we love you. If I had a song today, it would be Tennessee whiskey by Chris Stapleton. Mine would be Long Live by Taylor Swift. Really? I'm not surprised.

It's something by Taylor Swift. But you don't even know Long Live. Oh, it's such an epic Friday Night Light song. I really don't. I'm not surprised that I don't. That's the beauty of having you. as my co-host, you teach me so many things in life that I never really thought I ever wanted to learn. And I'm so good, you know, not really sure I want to learn them.

Oh, well, something I do have to learn. And I hope you've educated yourself because maybe I'm a bad host by saying that I didn't exactly dive deep into this controversy this week. However, the headlines were quite interesting. Amanda and Robbie, they broke up nine months ago and they're still feuding. It has something to do with a Disneyland annual. pass. I believe Amanda tweeted something saying that an ex of hers had emailed her because

the credit card that was attached to like automatically renewing the pass each year, which I guess she bought for him back in over the summer, had expired. She had changed credit cards or something. So it wasn't automatically renewing. And he seemed to be

assuming that he would get his season pass just automatically through his exes financials. And then he ended up exposing emails and now I'm all lost. All I know is that I think he expected to get a free Disney

pass this year. I've never have, Amy and actually, I've never had anybody care about me enough to buy me a season pass to Disney. That is a huge purchase first off. That's just what I want to start this thing. Is they're only together for a few months and they're buying each other

passes Disney? Amy, you'll know. And cars. Remember there was some car. he bought a car. What were they thinking? Crazy. They were dating for not only two, for two months. And then they were buying things for each other like that. I will give you guys the play-by-play.

And then you discuss and take your side. Okay. First of all, I'm trying not to have too much judgment, but why are they having this fight publicly? Like, can't you just email each other or pop a tech? Well, I guess because she got an email that infuriated her so much. Correct. But then he's got his old.

side, which was, hey, I got a note saying they were going to take you to collections. So I was trying to say, so collections is when you don't pay a bill. Oh. Like Disneyland or whoever can take you to collections. I love that Ashley doesn't know what connect collections. Yeah. You know why? Because I've always paid my bills.

But she pays her bills. That's right. Ashley, that's right. I've had all my automatic deductions in line. So I'm okay. First of all, the fact that it's public I hate. It's just so stupid. But I'm okay with his response saying, wait, I tried to email you because you're going to go to collections. So I wanted you to know to pay your bill. But then here's how he ruins his entire goodwill. Here's my standpoint. Why they're fighting publicly, I don't know. I actually bet if you ask both of them right now, are you glad that you let this few get public? I bet they would both say, no, this was ridiculous. Right. But here, okay, and I'm on his side. When it comes to, hey, I'm just caring about you. Your card looks at you, like something's messed up with it. Understand what you're saying, Amy.

I'm on his side. I get that. But he ruined it for him. He ruined it, by the way, he, he ended the email in something that is completely vulgar, disrespectful, should never be used against anybody ever. He ends the email by saying, oh, by the way, nice new. Oh, my God. No.

no no yes he ended his tweet he put that on his no no that's even worse oh my gosh and the email oh really no no oh my gosh who is he who is he that's insanity okay okay okay okay calm down take too depressed because this is a podcast and people need to like be able to hear us okay here's my question because this was even discussed amongst my my guy friends who are not Batchel fans. They didn't even watch my season, but they saw this feud on Twitter, and they were researching and looking up, they asked me about it. They called me, we all were talking about two nights ago at dinner, and they all said, like, is this something, like, how is he not, how is Robbie not getting more track for this? Like, if I said that,

and I never would, and I would never even think about saying it. But like, how did this pass without anybody kind of standing up and saying, Robbie, that is completely incorrect. Like, I don't care if you've had the worst breakup possible. I don't care if you hate this woman. I don't care if she did something to hurt you. Like, don't criticize a woman's look on an email that you're claiming was you being nice. Yeah. Right?

Ari was getting all that crap the other week for the fake pregnancy, but he's not getting much heat for this. It's weird to me. So this isn't normal, right? Like, my guy friends are great guys. A lot of them are not all. They've made them mistakes in their life. like we all have. But, like, for the most part, these are really good guys. And we could not comprehend how a man would say this to an X. Like, unbelievable. And then publicly, it's like

it gets worse. It's like, it's so crass and vulgar and inappropriate and uncalled for and every word I can think of. And then he's not bright enough to not put that into writing and publicly. Like, what? So he, so yeah, she brought it to Twitter because she was like, Did she maybe overlook the fact that he was trying to help because of the collections comment? Or did she just do it? And then he got so fired up that she would refer to an ex that was pretty obviously him, that he decided to also take it to Twitter. And then what did he say in the tweets to retaliate besides the nice t-a-part?

So here's the, yeah. I mean, so here's what happened too. When I first saw her tweet, I did do the original tweet that she tweeted. I had no clue she was talking about Robbie I thought actually she was probably talking about her ex-husband who was a part of like they got a pass together because he was taking the kids and she was taking the kids and so

it just worked. See I would have could have thought it was Josh Murray. Yeah so we didn't know that. Now was Amanda wrong for her reaction towards Robbie? Yeah she should not have been, he was trying to do something nice at least that's what he's claiming and so she should not have jumped on him like she did. But maybe with

the ending nice t-hast it's it's worthy of actually going off on. So I have a question, Ben. Are you sure that he wrote that in the original email? I actually, now you're making me question myself. I'm going to look it up while you guys talk. You guys talk and I'll look it up. Okay.

But the point here is too, and we have to remember this with every relationship that we ever hear about, this is a big story. It's not uncommon for X's to be mean to each other. That makes sense. It is very uncommon for it to be public. But we don't know the back story, right? I mean, maybe this is a theme of communication between them. Maybe they aren't very nice to each other typically.

So when Robbie did send the email, maybe Amanda just assumed that was coming from a bad place, and maybe Robbie was assuming that Amanda was going to jump on him for anything he did. We don't know that. We don't have the backstory here. But what I do know is that, and I don't care who you're at this, I don't care what they've done to you. there's no benefit to you personally to continue to keep any type of anger, resentment, or unforgiveness there. That's just completely inappropriate.

And then to kind of make this public like they did is just weird to me altogether. And I'm sure they would say the same thing. I would have a hard time believing either of them would be happy that this is now a public feud. Yeah, it's pretty ridiculous. Can I also call out something that's ridiculous about Robbie now that we're on this? And I like Robbie. Go ahead. I just want to say that.

So one of us is defending him. I like him. He's cool. But he always gets himself into hot water. Yeah, yeah. Well, he has his Instagram, uh, bio, like his pick. Like, you know, his Instagram pick, the little circle picture. Um, he has an extra ring around it.

And you may wonder why the ring is to symbolize that he has an Insta story up, but he has two rings around his. And the reason is that way it looks like he, always has a fresh insta story up so that he gets as many views on his insta story as possible so he has people looking at his insta stories over and over again i don't know if that makes sense you guys out there i'm going to put two circles around mine that's genius you understand what i'm referring to yeah i don't get it but i mean i mean it is it is crafty i will say that it is crafty but that way people are always like oh new story new story even if it

isn't a new story. So interesting, right? Well, he's giving us new stories for this week's podcast. I think this is one of one that is one of the most interesting stories of the off season. Don't fight publicly. It's not worth it for anybody. And we also have to publicly announce as a podcast that we're, you know, we think we're experts at this whole bachelor thing. But last week, we found out that we are not there are some couples out there that we're going to have on the phone today we're so excited about that we actually in all honesty either forgot about or we just got too carried away in the breakup that we didn't even stop for a second stage is there any other couples out there today on the

podcast we're going to have Derek because Derek and Taylor are still together and doing very well so we're going to talk to him to catch up on their relationship there's also one other couple that Ashley and I had no idea came from the bachelor world And we, Amy, we've tried to track them down. Do we have them on the podcast today? So no, not yet. It's Holly and Blake. And they're actually married.

And I have been Facebooking her, texting everybody from her season saying who has her number, like hitting contact on her website and trying and trying. And I'm going to keep trying. I will find her, but I haven't yet. Well, guys, that just explains why we don't even know that they're married because they're apparently very private. We did forget one other couple who will be on next week, I hope.

And that is Peyton and Chris Lambden. Who are they? Who in the heck are you? So they go way back in time and they were not on the same season. They met on like Bachelor Pat or somehow they met on one of those cruises. I don't know. And they got married and now they do shows on HGTV. No way.

They're like remodelsers, landscapers. Yeah. They will come on soon. So probably next week. Wow. All these hidden couples. Awesome. The Chris Landon actually reached out to me a couple times here.

as since the bachelor and it would just share some really good advice and information with me so i i don't know to know him personally i didn't realize that he had met somebody uh from the franchise but he has reached out i want to know ashley and amy yeah okay i you are the the bachelor experts on this podcast i is definitely more of an encyclopedia than i am okay how did we miss and how have we never heard of this secret couple that is married from the franchise like how did this get beyond us Apparently, they're just very private. I mean, she's not responding to any calls and texts.

I think they're from yesteryear. Do you know what I mean? So they're sort of dropped off the face more. Yeah. I'm sure she'll be happy to come on. I mean, I'm speaking for her, but it's just hard to track her down. Crazy. But how do we not even know they're together?

Like, that's my question is how did we miss them as a couple? Because even when it was brought to our attention that we missed them being together, none of us even knew about. How did that happen? I can fuzzily remember them. Okay. They were back in the, uh, Jake Pavelka type era. Yeah, but that's like only one generation below us.

Like the last article I can find written on them was from 2011. Okay. Hmm. Okay. That's a bit now. That is a bit now. Uh, well, I want to get to Derek and Taylor. We don't have Taylor on today.

Well, Derek's going into a meeting. So now we're trying to track down Taylor. Oh. As of last week, uh, we did speak very openly about some breakup and vaccination. You know, Ashley and I, this is the, off season for us. We're all across the board right now. Ashley, can you just give our listeners a little bit about what your kind of bachelor off season looks like today? Like, what exactly does your week consist? This week is a little bit lighter. I have this today. I already

pre-recorded. I don't get it podcast for this week. I am going to a scandal event for the finale on Thursday that I'm super stoked about because it's one of my favorite shows. I don't think it's been that great this season, but in the past, I've just been enthralled, and I have such a daddy crush. Ooh, yes, the epitome of a daddy crush on Tony Goldwyn, who plays the, well, the former president now. But last week was intense. Last week, I recorded two I don't get a podcast. I did a thing called Swapped. It's a new series on Clever TV, where I swapped lives with another guy, an actor.

So I had to, like, do an audition tape. I had to go to Juzitsu and just like live his life. And I don't like Juzitsu. I'll tell you that. You have like a stranger's. I feel like you're a fighter. You have a stranger's feet in your face. You're like, hold it on to their sweaty body.

And you don't know them. I don't like it. It's too invasive. But they said that that's, they said that there is something to that. Like being in somebody that you're not, you're not familiar with personal, space bubble. Like, it's good for you on some level. Yeah, so I had that. And then I also had actually a photo shoot with FabFit Fun for the spring box and the summer box. So that was my week. Well, so actually, you're bringing up some of the podcast. I want to take a second here.

We're just talking about Amanda and Robbie. Amanda will actually be co-hosting help I second dating this week with Dean and Jared. So I'm going to say, I think this is a good topic for Dean and Jared to discuss with Amanda on the podcast is what is it like to have a public feud with an X. I want to hear her opinion. I want to hear her thoughts. And I also want to hear kind of some more detail about what exactly happened. You know, from what I know Amanda is typically an open book. I'm sure she's not going to want to share everything, but possibly get a little info on what exactly is happening between her and Robbie. Actually, you ask what I'm up to these days. I'm actually sitting here right now at a double tree in Columbia, Missouri, overlooking

the Missouri University campus. I'm here to speak at an event for Missou for Malawi. And what we're doing tonight is we're trying to raise enough money to build a secondary school in the poorest country in the world, which is Malawi. And so I'm speaking here on behalf of generous, generous coffee. is partnering with this organization and try to make this happen. And so I'm at a double tree right now. Just getting ready to... I love double tree.

Did you get your chocolate chip cookies? I didn't. They're called welcome cookies? I had to run up here and get ready for this event because as soon as this podcast is over, I am sprinting across campus to the theater. And I'm going to do a nice little speech on what it means to be socially responsible in business.

That's amazing. Do you know what I'm doing tomorrow at UCLA? I'm talking about sex. No way. Yeah, I'm going to be, it's sex. Do you know anything about sex? It's Sex League at UCLA. And they wanted to get people who've been open about sex on reality TV.

So I'm on that panel. That's interesting. I'm going to say, you've gone from, I mean, you've really gone from the version of TV to now the sex for expert. And I guess I need to be caught up on your life. I think it was like, I think it was sex or lack thereof, but it's a whole panel about the topic. And I have no idea what I'm going into tomorrow. I will be sitting up there and just taking life as it comes at me. Well, just answer you can.

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She says, Ben, Ashley, love your podcast, only wish the both for you. So sweet. Secondly and most importantly, thank you for introducing me to bio clarity without it. I would have never been able to handle going into work without makeup. Two years ago, I turned 25 and my skin turned into something. I didn't even recognize. After trying so many different products, I decided to give bio clarity a try,

and I'm never looking back. My skin hasn't looked as great in years. I honestly can't believe what it looks like. In my wildest dreams, I would have never thought I could go for a full day of work with naked skin, but today I did it and I'm confident. I will do it in the future.

So thank you. And thirdly, she loves Ben, bitches. It's the best segment of any podcast I listen to currently. Let it out, Ben. You'll find that more people agree. then disagree. Keep up the good work and live your best lives. I've been Cassie. Speaking of Ben Bitches. I have two quick updates before we do Ben bitches. Number one, Ari and Lauren were spotted with

the marriage boot camp therapist. Oh. I was curious why. So I got Dr. V on the phone right now so we can find out why they were spotted with her. Okay. Next, I tracked down Holly of Holly and Blake. How does this all happen in 10 minutes? I don't know. I just have been over. over here working hard. So right after we talk to Dr. V, we can talk to Holly and find out who the heck she is. Okay. And then, I hope you have time for Ben, bitches. Okay. Maybe we start with that. Ben, are you ready to bitch right now? Um, yeah, I can. So today, in today's age, I'm, I like to connect. I like relationships. I like relationship. I like relationship of friends. I like relationship in romance. But I just like to get to know people. It's fun for me. I don't

know what else we're doing here on earth unless we're really investing into each other. But what I've noticed recently is that people can't get off their phones. And I'm not just saying like an old person complains like your face is in your phone. I'm saying like literally today we've evolved the place where we can multitask by texting and have the same time. I'm not that talented. I can't do it. And so what I see when I'm trying to talk to somebody and I'm trying to invest in somebody,

I'm trying to tell somebody my life story. And they're just picking up their phone glancing at it. I see a level of disrespect. I see a level of they don't care that what I'm saying. They're never in the moment anymore. I'm saying today that I'm bishing about technology because I'm sick and tired of us all being consumed by our phones and never being consumed by each other. What happened to the good old days when we could sit down for dinner at night around a table or amongst some friends and share life together? Instead, now, we have to share life together every second of the day.

exhausting. It's humiliating to be sharing your life story with somebody and have them checking their computer screen or their phone screen the whole time. And I'm sick and tired of nobody taking the time to get to know me or letting me take a time to get to know them. I agree. I agree, Ben. It is a problem. You know, you go to dinner with friends and they're on their phones. I think that my friends are pretty good about it, though. I think like we keep it in our purse and I usually don't see him when we're like sitting down to dinner. I think the worst time is normally if you're sitting around a

family room, then you're not talking to each other. Then you're just all on the couch on your phone. What do you do you find that? I think you just came up with a t-shirt line. I think the new generous t-shirt for generous threads is going to be keep it in your purse. That's going to be the tagline. That's cute. With a little with a little picture of a phone.

We have it. We actually have an email here from Susie. She goes, hi. Why not call? Ben's bitching, benting, like venting. That's kind of cute. Benting. No, I think Ben bitches is just our segment name. I literally have a list on my phone now of things that just really bother me, and I started

to write it down. I'm really excited each week now to continue to share what really gets me going. Technology is a big one for me. We've misplaced our ability to have deep relationships because we're too consumed with what's happening every second of the day or what updates we're getting. And I get it. It's exciting. And for a lot of reasons, social media helps us connect even better than we ever did before.

But, you know, Ash, I really do miss the ability to look somebody in the eyes and know that I'm going to get an hour and a half of undistracted communication with them. I think that is such a lost art, one that we need to get back. Let's get back to simplicity a little bit. I like that. If we could do an Ashley bitches for like 10 minutes, to 10 minutes, not 10 minutes. Sorry, sorry. Don't want to scare you. 10 seconds. Bikers, why you got to be on the road? You take up the entire lane and then you have to make

all the cars in that lane merge into the other lane and then you're really causing traffic issues and it just seems so selfish as me and they seem so smug on that bike. They're like, yep, the world revolves around me. There you go. That's it. I knew you were going to take over this segment at some point. This is too much down your alley for you just to let me. have my moment here. Sorry, darn it. Okay, hey, we have a special guest on. We've got to hear what is going on in the world of Dr. V. Dr. V, thank you so much for joining us today. Thank you so much for having me. And Ashley, hi, are you there? Hi, I'm here. Hi, great. So I wanted to start out with two things. Okay. One, Ben, you were saying in your last episode that it's hard

doing a podcast because you don't get a lot of feedback, you know, you, like, you can't hear the other side of what's on the other side of the wall. So just want to tell you guys, I love your podcast. I think it's so great. And I think you're great together. Thank you. That means so much. I'm so happy that, uh, you guys are doing this. And the second thing I want to tell you is that, um, today is my first day off of coffee. So I'm not like I'm not, yeah, I know. I'm not at my caffeinated best. You sound, you sound like you are. Do I, really? Bright and perky.

Well, you can only imagine why I had to give off coffee. So I decided to go down that path. Does your head hurt? Like, in the event that I'm not 100% all there, I just want to, you know, you're just one of the excuse, really, at the end of the day. They say never, like, come up with an excuse as to why you're not at the top of your game because people probably aren't going to notice. Oh, no, let me tell you.

For me, it's like, set the expectations low. That's the expectation slow. And then you can exceed their expectations, right? So that's the place where I come from, which is just really a psychological game. So I'm here. I'm ready. And what are we talking about today? Dr. V, I just want to start by saying two things.

One, I'm upset to hear you're off coffee. I am a coffee guy now. I'm known best for us being a generous coffee guy. So that's sad for me. Second, as soon as you answer to the phone, there's just like this piece that came over me. I'm sure I actually feel in the same way I can just speak for. Your voice is very soothing. It's like this calming, no, so just to give the audience a little background here,

Dr. V, who are you and what do you do best in the world? You know, that is a very, like, let me do broad brushstrokes here. So my full name is Dr. Venus Nicolino, which is a big mouthful. So we just go by Dr. B. And what I do, I do a lot of different things. But what people mainly know me for is celebrity relationships. I had a show on Bravo called Ellie Shranks. And I came to Marriage Boot Camp Reality Stars, and now we have Marriage Boot Camp Reality Stars, and now we have Marriage Boot Camp Reality Star's Family Edition.

So it's been off of that show. So Marriage Boot Camp is in its – this is so crazy. in its 11th season, 10 is airing, and then season 11 will be airing in another couple months. You've had a ton of Bachelor alum on that show. We really have. And I have to say, there's some of my favorite couples. Jane and Tanner, Sean and Catherine. Did you have JJ and Julia?

Yep, yep, we did. We did. We have a lot of Bachelor couples. couples and bachelor couples. And again, they're like my favorite. And I think because they come on the show, it's almost like they come on the show and we get to see different parts of them than what we saw on The Bachelor or The Bachelorette. Well, when you get down to the nitty-gritty, we saw pictures of you hanging out with Lauren and Ari recently. What's that all about? Are they going to be on marriage boot camp?

You know, I'm just going to say this. I was annoyed that they seemed genuinely happy because I would love to have them on our show. I'm just going to say that. But wait, that being said, do you feel like Sean and Catherine or Jade and Tanner weren't genuinely happy when they did the show? I think everyone comes on the show for some kind of reassurance. Money? I think, I mean, do you do a show like that simply because of the money?

Like two things could be true. You could do the show for the money, but you also could be doing the show to get something out of it. And by the way, what I love about Marriage Boot Camp is that you cannot avoid getting something out of it. We put our cast members, no joke. I am not kidding you. Like, through the ringer, through a real, real boot camp. And people always get something out of it. So, I mean, there's multiple truths.

So, yes, you're probably, you're probably right. People do come on the show for money. But I think they also come on the show to get something else out of it. So, I mean, that doesn't, why were you with Ari and Lauren then? I mean, it's interesting to me, were you just giving a checkup? Do you do private counseling? What was going on? Well, I think that, you know, there's one person's miserable X is another's loving soulmate.

It just has to go down that way, right? And yet, what was fascinating about the season is that we never really see that on television. We never really see the transition. And I think that was traumatic not only to The Bachelor fans, that I think it was traumatic to Ari and Lauren as well. Do you understand what I'm saying? Like we never, like, for example, we'll be able to see a couple that's breaking up. And then they'll risk someone else.

We never really get to see an actual transition of what that might look like. Can you give us any dirt about wedding planning for them? Are they planning on getting married soon? Yes. Yes, very soon. Is this premarital counseling you're doing? You know, I, I, is it, is it, what we call it pre-marital counseling, or would it be like, guys, put on the breaks? You know what I mean?

Like, I don't know that. Like, are you, like, are, I think, part of being on The Bachelor, because the relationship started, in an open forum. The relationship doesn't continue in an open forum. You go behind closed doors, right? At some point, you have to press it, like the metaphor, you have to press the private button on your Instagram, right? I mean, you could open it at any time, but you're going to have to press that button.

You're going to have to have an intimate relationship without the cameras on you. Yeah, my question is, why do you think that they are rushing to get married so quickly? Did they open up to you about this? They genuinely feel that they are ready for that step and they want that step. It's not a way to prove to the audience that this is really the right situation. I mean, look, everyone has their own opinion about that. I mean, obviously, is that yours, Ashley? Do you feel that that's why they'd be doing it?

Sort of. I think it's kind of Ari's way of writing. the original wrong he made. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. And do you feel, I'm just curious. Do you feel that it's wrong because of the way that he did it?

Or do you feel that it's wrong because we got to see the transition of a relationship on television and that's normally not what we see? I was just curious. I guess I don't mean, like, I know it was right for his life,

but I guess it's a way to prove to the Bachelor audience. that he made the right choice and in the end, does it really matter if he was so villainized if he is happy with his soulmate at the end of the day? Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.

And we would, I'm just trying to get a sense of it. We would villainize him because of the way he... People did villainize him. I'm saying, I don't, I feel like he's fine. But I feel a lot of people, yes, they're very, very angry about the fact that he proposed to him. Billboards were going up everywhere.

I mean, I get, I got you. I'm just trying to understand in what way do you see this or others see it. I'm just trying to understand. Others are seeing it as he should never have proposed to another girl if he wasn't really certain. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. And then, like, it was an odd choice to propose to Lauren on after the final rose. Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm. Yeah. But I do want to move on to another relevant question now that. we have an expert here to answer the question. Last week, Ben and I were discussing how long is the suggested minimum to date before getting engaged? And then how long should a couple be engaged before heading down the aisle? Well, I mean, that is everyone, look.

I guess success rate was. I believe the success rate is three years. I'm not sure. I would have to check on that. Three years totaled together? Yes, three years totaled together and then engaged. For an entire other year? Or just within that year?

Oh. So you're engaged for three years, then you have one year, and then you're a married. Oh, so you date for three years and then you're engaged one year. Okay. All right. Very interesting. But that can move and change, right? Everybody is so different.

So I think people. need to do what is best for them in every relationship is so different and that's what's so unique about them is that they're so different you said that your bachelor couples have been your favorite on marriage boot camp i want to know is there a common denominator you see amongst all of them that you don't necessarily see with other couples not from the franchise yes so um what i see as a common denominator is that the bachelor couple's romance is very set in this petri dish of BS. You, the, meaning that the romance. Just a petri dish of BS? Yeah, yeah. Meaning that absolutely, that the romance is set up for

you, that everything is set up for the male, everything is set up for the female, the actual work of the relationship is set up for you. So what ends up happening is that the couples that come on our show, it's breaking down those walls of this, nothing's going to be set up for you now. You're actually having to be real and intimate with people. You're not going to be having dinner in an Irish castle. So how do you reconcile those two very different ideas of what a romantic relationship is and what an intimate relationship is. Like, how do you reconcile the day-to-day versus how you meant on a national television show? So that's the through line that I see with every single couple, on top of feeling that they have to manage their image. And that is

something that anyone can empathize with. You know, you're having to manage your image all day long, whether we want to admit that or not, I think the bachelor couples are in a situation on television where they're managing their image. And so they bring that to their lives, and they bring that to my show as well. So having to break down those walls isn't easy. And yet, you know, there's some of my favorite couples because of those reasons, because they're so relatable, right? Mm-hmm. Do you see heightened communication between the bachelor couples just because we were, the relationships were formed in an environment in which they had to, they were almost forced to communicate on very vulnerable topics early on? I see managed communication.

You know, it's not, I understand what you're saying, that you're seeing them being able to communicate on an intimate level. And they believe they're communicating on an intimate level. But there's different levels of intimacy. And often what I see in managing their image, they're also managing their vulnerabilities, what they reveal to one another, how they are seen to one another, and as a couple. So, you know, for example, a lot of the bachelor couples come in and make these packs as one another. Okay, we're not going to talk about this. and we're not going to talk about that.

And that just doesn't work on my show. It doesn't work because the show doesn't allow that. At some point, during the process, during the breakdown process, you're going to reveal the things you don't want to talk about because that's how the show is set up. So while I can understand why you would say, oh, you know, they're communicating on an intimate level and they're having these different conversations,

there's different levels of intimacy. So I encourage them to go even deeper with one another and not have to manage their vulnerability so much. Before we let you go, just to sum up the whole Lauren and Ari meeting, it seems like you are just doing some off-camera marriage counseling with them. Yeah. I mean, it's the, they, again, they seemed like really happy. and I was bummed about that because I would love to have them on our show. But the counseling is off camera

and not produced through ABC or such? The count, yes. Okay. Yeah. Did they come to you? Did they? Yes. Interesting.

All right. Well, Dr. V, thanks for being so informative and giving us the dirt. Well, thanks for having me. And again, I love you guys. I think your podcast is great. And if you need anything in the future, just give me a buzz. Well, it's so nice to have a relationship therapist, psychologist at hand whenever we have a relationship issue arise in the future.

Okay. I appreciate that. And you guys have a great day. Thank you, Dr. V. Bye. All right. Bye-bye. Well, when your relationship's good, I've got a great thing that you can do together as a couple.

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slash almost famous. That is blue apron.com slash almost famous Blue Apron, a better way to cook. Hey, Holly. Hi. Hello, Bachelor alum that I've never met or heard of. I know, right? Well, Blake and I disappeared after the show. So what happened with you guys?

We did the opposite of what everybody else does on the franchise. And I actually lived in L.A. when I was cast for the show. And then after Bachelor Pad, I moved away to South Carolina to get married. And then most people moved to L.A. and tried to do something. But we snuck away and kind of hit out in the world. Which season of Bachelor Pad were you on? The second season. And what season of The Bachelor were you on?

Yeah. What was Blake on? I was on season 12 of The Bachelor. Who was The Bachelor? It was Matt Grant, the guys in London, but nobody remembers. And then what season was Blake on? Blake was on Ashley A. Bear's season. No way.

Like, I watched that season. Yeah. So he was the last one to go home right before hometown. So I think he left fifth. Well, tell us a little bit about your love story. How did you meet on Bachelor Pat? Had you met beforehand? What was it like when you first saw him?

Well, I immediately thought he was attractive. I walked in the door. And I told the producers, I said, you know what? The only thing I want to see when I walk in is just a handsome man. And when I walked into the house for Bachelor Pad, he was the only guy in there. And I was like, all right, well, this worked out well. I'm ready to go. And so we just got along really well.

but I had been in a relationship previously to Michael Stegliano, who was on. No way. Yeah, so we were engaged and we had just called off our engagement and then they throw us both in Bachelor Pad together, which was a little tough. Oh. Okay, so how did you meet Michael then? Just through the show. And you guys were engaged? Yes.

And then they threw your ex-fiance into the bunch in Bachelor Pad, too. where you then met Blake. Did you leave in a very strong monogamous relationship? Blake and I left the show engaged. Oh, you left the show engaged? Yeah, Blake proposed on the finale of Bachelor Pett, too. Do you have a Neil Lane Diamond? Yes, I do.

Wait, how in the world do we know about you? I know. Well, we really did, like, just give it all up and, like, sneak away and just lived our own life. And I know. I'm like, we're the only couple from Bachelor Pad. You're the only couple from Bachelor Pad. Yeah, I think that's how kind of Bachelor in Paradise started

because, you know, we got engaged and we fell in love and they're like, oh, well, this could be a thing. And so they wanted more engagements at the end. So I think that's, you know, kind of how Bachelor in Paradise has gone off of that. That's amazing. I love this. I love that we can add your name to the list of successful Bachelor couples. Right?

I know. And I won Bachelor. Pets, so I won double-time. Oh, my gosh. Yes, you got money out of it, too. Yeah. Yes. So you moved to North Carolina, but you guys have an H-D-TV show together, right? No, that's a different.

Okay, we live in South Carolina. There's another couple that came out of the show. They live in North Carolina. Another mystery couple. Yes. She, I know, was on Bachelor Pets 1, I think. or bachelor, yeah, that's what I think she was. But then he was just on Alley season, and I think they met and got together.

But yeah, they do all that stuff in North Carolina. And Blake and I just live the simple life in South Carolina. What do you guys do? And do you have any kids? We, okay, so Blake is a dentist. I think that's why they wanted him for Ashley a bear season because he was also dentist. And then I run a princess party company. And so I have a bunch of girls that dress up as princesses and go out to parties and stuff.

And then I also have a spray canning company. And then I ended up publishing my children's book right after Bachelor Peds. So I travel around and do stuff with that. So every day is different for me. So you have a children's book and you have a princess party company. Do you have children? Okay. So we started trying, we don't talk about this ever.

But I will open up to you. Here's a little inside scoop. Um, we started trying as soon as we got married, which was almost six years ago. Wow. And then within the last six years, you know, we've done everything to have children. Um, and we can't. So we, I mean, we literally have tried everything. We've gone through IVS, um, couple, several times.

And right now we just are at a standstill until we figure out what to do. I'm so sorry. It's okay. And I didn't realize that, you know, one and eight women are infertile. and then we're just watching all these babies. Yeah, one and eight. So I'm just watching all these women like pop out babies left and right. I'm like, what's going on?

Well, I have to ask, do you know what Ari did with Lauren last week for April Fool's? Yes. So how did you respond? Yeah. So people are very sensitive to that. And, you know, more I see things. I hate when people joke about that because it is such a sensitive subject. people and I did see that and I was I was a little cough guard I was like no way they would do

that that was such like her I don't know that was that actually her belly was she just did eat a lot you know I think I think she had a pillow in there but I'm not 100% okay yeah I that was pretty insensitive but I'm not one to get like I'm not one of those people online that's going to write all this mean thing you know all these same things so I just kind of let it go but it did kind of hurt it stung a little bit well holly thank you for opening up and i'm so sorry to hear that yeah i know we just never we never talk about it and everyone i i get asked every day on instagram like why haven't you had kids yet why aren't you having you know just every single day asking me and i'm like you know what

if i could i would oh that's got to be exhausting emotionally really yeah i know i have a whole album saved pictures of every time someone asked me when i'm having a child kind of want to do a little video to let people know like it's not okay to ask well holly thanks for calling and thank you for letting us in on that now maybe people will second guess before they ask a question like that right more sensitive about it bring i think not a lot of people are aware of infertility because there's just people popping up babies left and right and the people that are struggling with it just don't talk and i've been so afraid to talk and every time i like just open up a little bit to someone, I feel like God sends something my way, you know? And it's just like,

hey, thanks for opening up. Here's a reward. And so I feel like lately I've been wanting to open up more and more. And there we go. I just did. Well, now you have, you've just opened up to a lot of people. So hopefully God will send lots of little things your way. Wonderful. All right. Well, thank you so much, Holly, and say hi to Blake for us. I will. And we will shout you out every time. talk about successful bachelor marriages from now on. Well, I was wondering what was going on because all these people started tagging me on Instagram, tagging you too on my post. I was like, why are these two getting tagged on all my stuff?

Blake and I, and you guys must have said, you know, talk about the successful couple. Yeah. Well, thanks for being a little inspiration for us. We will talk to you soon. All right. Have a great day. Bye. Bye.

If you guys didn't quite realize Ben is no longer on the line. This podcast is mine. I'm taking over. I'm so glad we just got to know Holly a little bit and that she was so open and sweet with us. What a sweet girl. I got to go follow her on Instagram now. Well, I love Holly. And you know what else I love?

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Enter our promo code, almost famous, and you're always going to have something new to wear. Okay, guys, we're going to do reader. Okay, guys, we're going to do listener emails. now, and because Ben's on here, our lovely Mark in studio. Oh, thank you. I love Mark. He's so great.

And you have the best radio voice. Oh, you're so sweet. I'm so jealous of it. Well, I'm very honored to be here on the almost famous podcast, reading this email from Lauren. Hi, Ben and Ashley. My name is Lauren. I live in San Francisco.

My boyfriend of four years currently lives in Meneffey, which is in Riverside County, Southern California. We first met when we both lived in San Francisco, but for the past year, he's moved back to Southern California to be with his family. I'm stuck in San Francisco for the time being. because I'm finishing up my degree. We've been making it work with lots of road trips back and forth. Your podcast helps me survive those eight-hour drives, but I need help.

It feels as if our spark is diminishing, and I'm not sure on what I should do to help us rekindle our love. Do you have any tips of her surviving a long-distance relationship, seeing as you might have had experience with this coming off the Bachelor franchise? Love you both so much. You inspire me on every road trip warmly, another Lauren. Aw. Well, I was in a long-distance relationship for three.

months I FaceTimed every day it didn't exactly you know turn out in the end so I don't think that I'm the person to be giving advice on this. Dirty FaceTime? No no dirty face time Amy's kind Amy dirty face time so she

might be able to help better in FaceTime no you send dirty videos sure and I'm totally open to dirty face time I like sent a couple like mild picks like in a sexy bra with like a lot of cleavage but I think

I think sexy picks are normally sexy when there's more to like imagine like the illusion not just like all out there nudies do you do nudies she does nudis but no face Mark Mark

okay as a man a married man and you've been married for like 19 years 20 no way sorry together 20 married 15 and I highly encourage my married friends to do it, even if they're not in a long-distance relationship. It's like, come on. Wait, okay. At first, I was going to ask Mark, how much do you love that? Does your wife do it? Did you ever do it? Look, I'm all for it. If your couple's into it, great. Neither one of us have ever done anything like that. And I don't think we'd be able to pull it off. I think it'd be

funny at this point. Yeah, it would be funny at this point. You're right. 20 years into it. I don't think that sexy pictures and videos can keep the relationship completely alive, though. They sure can. Yeah, in my case. Because you got to do what you got to do. If it's long distance, it's long distance. And you got to, you know, make the best of it. For you guys, I mean, you were together for four years.

So I feel like you're pretty solid. I think right now the only thing is the distance. And as long as you get to move and eventually, you're just finishing up your degree. I mean, you're going to be fine. That's the key. Just push it through. You have an end date. See, that's actually what Kevin always wanted with us and was one of the reasons that I was like,

this is the point where I need to, you know, put a halt to this because he kept saying, like, even if you tell me you'll move in a year or like I get a job and the job doesn't start for a year, that would be fine because I have an end day as to when this long distance will end. And it sounds like your long distance will end when your school ends. They're in the same time zone. She lives in San Francisco, this guy lives in L.A. It's like, that's a drive. They can meet in the middle.

So that means, hello, Paso-Robos. Yeah, you guys should do a lot of meeting in the middle. You know, just listen to Marin Morris. Just meet him in the middle. That song is on repeat and it's so annoying. I can recommend a wonderful hotel in Paso-Robles. Three years, I mean, three years, three hours each person. But I think, look, I think for all couples, I find a married couple.

I keep finding this with my friends. They just like let the fun die. And it's like, come on, people. Live a little. I would, I would, well, Amy, you and I can easily say that as like we, we haven't been in these like, you know, marriage long relationships. Right. I haven't been married for 20 years, but I've been in relationships for many years.

And it's like, send a little photo. It's fine. Yeah. I don't know. I don't know how it is when the magic dies. I can teach you. It kind of sounds scary. But.

You bring it back to life, and then it doesn't die. Yeah. I don't think my parents, my parents haven't let it die. My dad texts my sister and I on the daily. Yesterday, he sent a bitmoji that says, news flash, I love your mother. Like always. Just text my sister and I saying, I love your mom. That's cute.

We know, we know, dad. It's so cute. He still leaves a note on the kitchen table every day before he leaves for work. It's really adorable. How many years for them? They have been married for three. 37 and together for 40 they met with my mom was 20 that's awesome yeah so it's pretty what about just a dirty tech it doesn't have to be a photo like if you want to just start start light

that's good get your toe into the pool a little bit yeah sure yeah yeah you can google it too if you google tip but everything's on the internet but hey Lauren I'm thinking since you guys are in the same state how about you go to him one week then he goes to you the next week and then you meet in the middle of the other week and then then you take a week off that way you're seeing each other consistently every five to six days i mean that's pretty good and then you're spending really quality time because it's like on the weekend you don't have to even bother with work or any distractions look long distance relationships are hard i also read that experts say if you know the other person's schedule it really really helps and i find that to be true like if he's like hey

this is what i'm doing today i have a lunch meeting and then i'm going to going to, you know, play golf and then I'm going to do this. And then she knows it really helps because you feel closer to the person. It's super weird that helps. Oh, interesting. But it really does. It cuts down on anxiety if they're not responding or you're like, why haven't I heard from him in so and so hours?

Well, it's because he's been doing this. Exactly. You know what's going on. I'm in a meeting. I'm at lunch. I'm taking a shower. I mean, I'm a little too much. I'm taking a shower.

Amy is a very communicative woman. I like a lot of communication. All right. Let's take the question on the Broadway show. Janelle. Yeah. After we do a little bit of a word from FabFit Fun. You guys, I did a photo shoot for FabFit Fun this week.

And I got a sneak peek at the summer box, which is pretty darn intense. It's worth hundreds of dollars. It's so good. there's tart makeup uh there's just some amazing brands in there that you're like wait a second there's no way you're only getting this for 39 99 it's pretty impressive but let's talk about what's actually in the spring box which is what you can get now there's a rachel pally reversible clutch it's super cute what i love about it is that you can stuff anything in it because it has a design that can hold way more than your average clutch then there's a free people and under

understated leather eye mask. What I love about this eye mask is that you stick in this little cooling gel element so that it's a sleep mask and it's also, you know, an ice pack for your face in the morning because we all know that I like putting ice on my face in the morning because it depuffs my eye area. Then there's also an Anderson Lily candle. Everybody needs a new candle. I truly believe that candles are one of the things in life that you can't get enough of because they burn out and you're always going to need another one. Then there's Murad Skin Perfecting Lotion. Murad is such a high brow brand,

and you're going to get it in this box that is only $39.99 when you use our code almost famous. So here's what you do. You go to fabfitfund.com. You plug in our code, almost famous, and you save $10 making your box, only $39.99. Again, Fabfitfund.com, almost famous.

And treat yourself to a box, that is loved by Chloe Kardashian, Bethany Frankl, Ashley Simpson, Nikki Reid, on and on and on. And it also loved by me. All right, let's talk about that Broadway show, Mark, because I have some things to say about it. I'll bet you do. Janelle says she is so curious to hear Ashley's thoughts on dear Evan Hansen. I saw it last year and it truly changed my perspective on the relationships I have with the people surrounding me. The show has a great message and opens up an important dialogue about human connection and the effects of social media.

Ashley, did you feel this way? Okay, so I thought that there was a really good message in the show, as she just says. The message is that you have to be really aware of all the people around you, even if you're not really directly friends with them. But if it's somebody at your school who seems lonely or even someone at work who seems very disconnected and lonely, like you have to kind of realize what that person is going through and always reach out and be friendly and nice. and there's a whole message on, like, anti-bullying in the show. What I didn't love about it, and it, you know, it's the Tony winner. It is just pretty much everybody's favorite original show on Broadway right now. But what I didn't love about it is that the whole storyline is based on lies.

So instead of concentrating on the important message, I found myself frustrated because I knew that Evan was going to get caught in these lies and the entire time just dreading, oh, is this the moment? Is this when it all falls apart? And I was less concentrated on the good message. I just wish that they could have somehow made it less about lying. Yeah. And then I have to say, wasn't totally blown away by the music.

I don't get, I don't get it. It's kind of like something I should do on my I don't get a podcast because I don't get the hoopla that surrounds your Evan Hanson. Was it a good show? Really good. Did you see it with Ben Platt? No. And everybody keeps saying this.

So the guy who played Evan was very, very good. But now every time I say that I liked it, but I wasn't blown away, people are like, oh, it's probably because you weren't watching it with Ben Platt. Yeah? Yeah. I've heard such extraordinary things about him and people just love him so much. And then he was at our jingle ball and everybody was just freaking out. Okay.

So maybe that was it. I think that's why. So guys, don't kill me. I liked it. Probably not going to see it again. See, I'm a big Broadway fan. I saw hairspray 10 times on. Broadway. I saw one of my favorite, like, lowbrow musicals is called Bloody Bloody

Bloody Andrew Jackson. I saw it five times in three months. It was a parody about Andrew Jackson's life. And it had the most millennial humor. And I get angry at Hamilton because Hamilton is what Bloody Bloody Andrew Jackson was, but somehow was able to find the audience that Bloody Bloody Really struggled to get. Yeah, I closed after four months on Broadway. but it's very Hamilton-like. It was a rock musical that just made fun of Andrew Jackson. It was so great.

Are you going to see mean girls? I will see mean girls. I want to see kinky boots because my favorite American idol, David Cook, is in it for a very limited time. So I'm going to go see that on May 4th, I believe. What else did I see a zillion billion times? Oh, my God.

I saw Rock of Ages seven times. Yeah. So anyway, guys, I saw Aladdin, 3,000. times. I see all. I see it all. I see it all. But I had very, very high expectations for dear Evan Hansen and I was just left liking it. It was no greatest showman, guys. No greatest showman. All right. Well, that's enough of Ashley's critique on Broadway. I appreciate you guys listening to me, especially when Ben isn't around to really carry the podcast and make it sound smooth and sleek. Until next time, I'd love to hear your thoughts in comments, whether you've

seen Dear Evan Hansen or... About Amanda and Robbie. I need to know what people think. We need to know what you think about Amanda and Robbie. We also need to know how to spruce up a long-distance relationship, how to keep the spark alive when you don't get to see each other on a daily basis. All right. So you can send those thoughts and comments to Ben and Ashley at iHeartMedia.com. And until then, I've been Ashley. And I love you. Follow the Ben and Ashley I, almost famous podcast on IHartRadio, or subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts.