The Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast - Should I Hook Up With My Neighbor?

Episode Date: July 25, 2026

Mr. Right is back to answer YOUR questions!  Should you be worried your husband has a female best friend? Is it a good idea to hook up with your hot single neighbor after your divorce? Mr. Right is giving you the honest single man perspective you need! Email us at: [e-mail] or call us at 844-4-I Do Pod (844-443-6763)Follow I Do, Part 2 on Instagram and TikTokSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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We're launching Podlandia, AEO rewatch, our brand new podcast where we revisit every episode of Portlandia together. breaking down sketches, going deep on our iconic characters, and pulling back the curtain on how it all got made. And we'll also be joined by the people who helped bring it all to life. Guest stars, collaborators, and friends, including director Jonathan Chrysall, the mayor himself, Kyle McLaughlin, legendary musician Amy Man, and many more. Kyle is going for it here. You fully improvised, not just words, but a song about it.

Well, I thought you were all going to write a song. I remember you thinking that. Listen to Podlandia. A.O. Rewatch on the Arch. IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. What's up, fam? I'm sports journalist Ari Chambers. Hey, what's up, y'all?

It's your girl, Sam Jay. And we're the host of everyone watches women's sports, a new podcast from Together and I Heart Women's Sports. We're breaking down the biggest headlines. Naomi Osaka, showing out. Shoutouts to you, Naomi. The viral moments. I've been obsessed with Kashan Rock's boxing journey. She looks good.

Her combos are swift. And the stories everyone's talking about across women's sports. Because everyone watches women's sports. Listen to everyone watches women's sports on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. I'm Nick Totoro. You probably know me from NYPD Blue, The Longest Yard, or Spike Lease Black Klansman. And on my new podcast, delivering happiness with Nick Tatourl, I deliver pizza to a new guest. I've shared a slice with everyone from Seth Rollins.

What are you doing, my belt? To Bill Burr. I don't think I've ever met somebody so exactly out of their mind as I am. And now, we even have more great guests coming up, including the great church. John Tuturo. It's called happiness. Delivering happiness. And many, many more. Open your free high-heart radio app. Search Delivering Happiness with Nick Totoro. And listen now. Here I do, part two. It's your real life. Single divorce guy, Mr. Wright. And I'm back because we've gotten so many calls into our hotline. And if you have any questions, you can always call us at

8444-443-67-6-3 and leave a comment, leave a question. But we've gotten a lot of incoming voicemails asking for some advice. So today I'm going to dive in and give you an honest perspective from a single male divorce guy. And I'll give you my perspective on things. All right then, let's quit wasting time and dive right into our first voicemail. I have a question. I got married about a year ago and everything's going great. But my husband has a really good best friend from childhood, that's a female. And they hang out one-on-one a lot alone. And I feel like ever since we got married, it's kind of inappropriate. I love her, but I also have always had this feeling that she has feelings for my husband, but nothing's ever been acted on, they say. So I don't know,

what are your thoughts here? Thank you so much. So this is a really good question. And I guess the first thing is was that relationship there when you started dating? So did you kind of know what you're getting yourself into? And, you know, was this relationship present when you started dating and falling in love? And then it then get, you know, uncomfortable for you because, you know, you guys started falling in love. So I think that's the real question. Because if that relationship was there beforehand, that's probably something that you probably should have taken notice of. But I can totally understand.

and, you know, the way that it feels when you see somebody else with your significant other, whether that's a, you know, girl or a guy, whatever the case may be, it can be uncomfortable. And that's one of those things can start to fester and get complicated. And if you don't talk about it, it can get worse. So, yes, I think that, you know, that your old friendships do and should change and respect the new relationship, especially when it's dealing with love. But you have to be honest about it. You have to be able to talk about that with your significant other.

Tell them it makes you uncomfortable. Maybe they can convince you that it's nothing to be uncomfortable about. Or maybe they don't even know that you're uncomfortable about it. But at this part, especially we're talking chapter two later on in life, communication, openness is everything. So talk about it. All right. What do you think we go into our next voice? male and start to listen a little bit about talking about dating after divorce.

Hi. So what I want to know is when did you feel comfortable date again after divorce? I feel like, you know, I put so much emotion and so much everything into my marriage and then, you know, the divorce is a whole other thing. So I don't know if I feel comfortable dating yet, but curious from a guy's perspective, when did you feel comfortable dating again? All right. So I was married for almost two decades. So, you know, getting back out and dating was complicated because, you know, feeling that kind of nervousness about being across the table from one other person, it's awkward. And it's tough, especially when you haven't done it for a long time. And part of me couldn't help but seeing my ex across the table. And, you know, so it took a while.

And the way that I kind of got used to it was going out with a group of people and trying to kind of break the ice slowly in a group setting that when I did feel uncomfortable, and I did, I promise you I did feel uncomfortable. I could kind of back off a little bit. You can't back off when you're on a one-in-one date, but you're just another person because it's just, you know, obviously it's a lot more difficult. So for me, it was a little bit like dipping my toe in the water and then getting more comfortable. and then slowly over time, and I can't say it six weeks or six months, it's whatever feels natural to you. But the more that you get out there, the more you put yourself back in those social situations, those group dates, you know, those sort of settings, I think it does get easier, but there's no formula. It doesn't get easy immediately.

And you just have to kind of feel your way through and do what feels right to you. But that first date, no matter when it is, is going to feel awkward. expect that, get used to it, get ready for it, but it gets better. All right, it's time for our next voicemail coming in from another listener. Hi, I'm dating someone who is divorced, and I feel like he's constantly comparing you to his ex-wife. Is this normal? Did you ever do this? How do I not take this personally, or should I consider it a red flag? Now, this is a very touchy subject, especially if, you know, you haven't been, been married before and you're dating somebody that's newly divorced because there's going to naturally

be this inclination to compare and to contrast and to complain about an ex and to compare to an ex. And I don't think it's a red flag, but here's another situation in which you just need to communicate that it's making you feel a little uncomfortable because this other person that you're dating that's been married before, that might be all that they know for a long time. And so that's what they're comparing you to, to something that is known to them, that is comfortable to them, and ultimately was uncomfortable to them and didn't work out. So the comparisons can be both positive and negative. It could be comparisons for the things that that person found in somebody, that found attractive in somebody. But on the other side, that could also be comparing and identifying some of the things that they didn't like about that person.

So I think that if it's making it uncomfortable, if it's, you know, it's, you know, it's, obvious enough that you're noticing it, I think it's time to say something and remind that person, hey, hey, you're not dating your ex anymore. You're dating me. It's okay to, you know, to have learned from your past relationships, but at some point you have to move on and be the best version of you, you can be for me. So talk about it, communicate about it. If it makes you feel uncomfortable, let that person know. All right, we have another voicemail coming in from a listener. So let's roll that voicemail. Hi, my name is Julie, and I'm recently divorced and starting to date again.

I have this hot new neighbor who moved in across the street. Seems to be single. Should I even attempt to date someone who lives so close to me? Could this end up backfiring? Could you please let me know what you think I should do? Thank you so much. Dating the neighbor, the likelihood of this working out is very, very, very, small, the likelihood of this blowing up very, very high. The likelihood of this ending up on some

reality show, very, very high. So be very, very cautious. The old adage, you don't want to poop where you sleep. And this old adage, or this new ad is you don't want to date where you sleep. Because in the event that it doesn't work out, which it, you know, if you look at the odds, it probably won't, then from now on you're going to have that person watching who goes in and out of your house and in and out of your driveway or in and out of your parking garage forever. And, you know, again, if it's meant to be, it's meant to be. But that's what I'd be a little bit worried about. I wouldn't force that one.

I'd maybe take a pass. So I think when you're talking about being too close for comfort, I think it's any time that you might open your door and see that person that you tried to date, it didn't work out. That would make me nervous. That should make you nervous. So I think that, you know, if the person lives down the street or across town or near your coffee shop or place of business or whatever else, that's fine. That's totally fine because you might run into them. You might not. But it's going to be kind of an accident. But, you know, if you're living in an apartment building and that person is right across the hall, it just could get awkward. So get ready for it.

So I don't think that there's a rule for this except for maybe make it far enough away that you know if you run into them, it's an accident, not an eventuality. So I think this is a little bit like dating a coworker, which in the HR Human Resources File Binder, Rule number one, no dating in the office. Because inevitably, when it goes wrong or if it goes wrong, it blows up and it blows up huge. And, you know, just like you're walking into an office every day and seeing that same person, if you live across the street or next door in close proximity to that person, it's going to be kind of the same thing. So, yeah, office romance, you know, apartment building romance,

across the street romance. It's very convenient. Make no mistake. It's very, very convenient to, you know, for a, you know, for a romantic affair with somebody that lives close by to you. But, Just think of the repercussions. Think of how awkward that's going to be the next time you show up at the door to your house and you've got somebody else there and that ex-lover, that ex-romance pops up across and sees you. Just trust me. Be careful. I am speaking a little bit from experience. When I was a younger man, I had an office romance when my first job out of college. and it lasted about two and a half dates. I won't get into the half date, but it didn't last an entire third date. And, you know, come Monday morning,

there we were in the same office, meeting at the water cooler, showing up and leaving, you know, from work. And we were okay with it, but it could have been awkward. It could have been awkward. It was a little bit, but it could have been worse. Don't make it worse.

You've heard the chaos. Now you can see it. Do we want to jump right in? Watch all your favorite podcasts from start to finish right inside the free IHart Radio app. Make some noise. Wooee! Catch every laugh and eye roll on shows like Bestie Listen, Hey Jonas, and Las Culturistas. Now with full video.

I'll just leave that there. It's the same hosts and the same chemistry with all the hilarious moments you've been missing right on your screen. Open the free IHard Radio app. Search video podcasts and tap watch. What's up, fam? I'm sports journalist Ari Chambers. Hey, what's up y'all? It's your girl, Sam J. And we're the host of everyone watches women's sports, a new podcast from Together and I Heart Women's Sports. Because let's be real. Women's sports is giving us way too much to talk about these days.

So Kelsey Finler, she became the first female solo rower to go from California to Hawaii. My first thought is, like, what's up with the snacks? Like, what are we eating? The highlights, the rivalries, the breakout stars, the moments that take over your entire timeline. in the conversations that start during the game and somehow keep going all week. Every week, we're breaking down the biggest stories across women's sports. Naomi Osaka showing out, she beat.

Sabalinka. Shout out to you, Naomi. You get the palm, Naomi. You get the palm for that. Because we're not just interested in what happened. We're interested in why everyone's talking about it. Because everyone watches women's sports. Listen to everyone watches women's sports.

On the I-Heart Radio app. Apple Podcast or wherever you get your podcast. Hey, Portlandia fans. Carrie Brownstein and Fred Armisen here. You know us, or rather you know them. Tony and Candice, Nina and Lance, Spike, and yes, The Chicken. We've played a lot of iconic characters over the years, but today we're showing up as ourselves

to tell you about Podlandia, AEO rewatch, our brand new podcast. Each week we'll revisit an episode of Portlandia from the very beginning, breaking down the sketches, exploring the backstories of our most iconic characters, revisiting the Portland locations you know and love, and opening up about our creative process. How did any of this get made? Why do we think that was a good idea? We're ready to talk about it.

And we'll also be joined by the people who helped bring it all to life. Guest stars, collaborators, and friends, including director Jonathan Chrysall, the mayor himself, Kyle McLaughlin, legendary musician Amy Man, and many more. Kyle is going for it here. You fully improvised, not just words, but a song, a melody. Well, I thought he was going to write. I thought you were all going to write a song for you. I remember you thinking that.

Listen to Podlandia. Ayo rewatch on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Nick Totoro. You probably know me from NYPD Blue, The Longest Yard, or Spike Lease Black Klansman. But I'm also from Queens, which means I know pizza. And on my new podcast, delivering happiness with Nick Totoro, I deliver pizza from Prince Street pizza to a new guest. Are you delivering pizza now?

Then we sit down for a real conversation. I've shared a slice with everyone from Seth Rollins. What are you doing, my belt? To Alex Rodriguez. Just to let you people know, we're talking to one of the goats here. To Bill Burr. I don't think I've ever met somebody so exactly out of their mind as I am. And now, we even have more great guests coming up, including the great John Tuturo.

It's called Happiness, Delivering Happiness. Mariano Rivera. Thank you. Oh, my God. And many, many more. Open your free High Heart Radio app. Search Delivering Happiness with Nick Tutro. And listen now.

Hi, it's Jenny Garth. host of the I Choose Me podcast. This week, Monica Lewinsky. Yes, that Monica, the one the world tore apart. She's still standing. She's back and done hiding. It really felt like it was one of those situations where you literally do or die. Monica stared down shame and came out the other side, and she is here to change what you thought you knew. And it's sort of not over until we triumph. A conversation that will inspire you to choose yourself, starting to. today. Listen to I Choose Me on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. All right. Now it's time for our next voicemail of the afternoon. Take it away.

Hi. So I am recently divorced. It was finalized last week, and it's been a long time coming. I'm ready to date. My question for you is, as I'm dating, if someone asked why my marriage ended, do I give the raw, real reason? or a polished version to not scare them away. I can't shame with you why we got divorced, but it's because of him, not me. So I feel like I can tell him the truth, but I don't want to give them too much info on our first date. What do you think?

Let me know. Thank you. So I will say that all of my advice, my most important piece of advice for Chapter 2 relationships, especially when they're young and raw and vulnerable, is to be honest, is to be open and be honest. But having said that, you don't have to go into the gory details. I think that you should be honest whether, you know, if you got hurt coming out of a relationship and that makes you extra vulnerable or extra raw, you should share that with somebody.

You should talk about, you know, what your past relationship history is and reasons why you might be apprehensive about getting into something. So I think that, yes, be honest. but I don't think that you have to go diving into it right on the first date before you know this is someone you're going to see for a second, third, or fourth, or fifth, or forever date. But as you start moving through, I do think that you want to be as clear and open and honest as you possibly can, especially as you move through a relationship and it starts to develop more and more. You owe it to that person. That person owes it to you as well. If you have scar tissue, from an incident, from something that broke up your previous relationship,

you need to make sure that other person knows it. So they don't inadvertently walk into something they just didn't know about, that they weren't clear on. And you hope that every divorce has, you know, a story that they just grew apart, a story about them wanting different things. But there are the occasions when someone just gets hurt. The other person hurt that person, cheated on them, lied to them, you know, all of those, all of those damaging things that can cause a divorce.

And if that's happened to you, you're going to be carrying some of that resentment. You're going to be carrying some of that hurt. And it's going to take a while to get through. And you're going to need that person that you're dating to help you get through that over time. And if you're not sharing, that other person doesn't know what they're dealing with. They don't know how to be sensitive. They don't know how to be helpful. And ultimately, you're keeping something from them.

them. So yes and no. Be honest, be open. You don't have to start off right away with all of the delicate details. But, you know, if you want to let somebody in, you have to let them know what they're getting into. All right, we've got another voicemail coming in. So let's take a listen. Hey, guys. I have a quick question for you. Any little help. My ex-wife and I split about three years ago, and now she's dating a much younger guy who's now her boyfriend. I don't know if I need to be friends with him because he's going to be around my son a lot or if this is something that I should just push off to the side and let happen organically seeing if you guys think I should go get a drink with him go golfing or I don't know just you know have a chat we really appreciate

your insight thanks well this is a great question and a great perspective in especially in this chapter two because there is a you know a large likelihood that you are going to find somebody that has kids. And you're also going to find that your ex is going to date somebody that has kids and somebody's maybe dating your ex with whom you have kids. And that delicate balance about when, not only to introduce the new love of your life to your kids, also, when is it time to introduce the love of your life to the father or mother of your children? And I think it's, you know, it's really case dependent because of course when you sit back and think about it, you want to have,

you know, a very modern family type of a relationship where you have the ex and the, you know, husband or wife and the new love and you are all, you know, together co-parenting, working together, balancing all these things out.

But a lot of times there are complications to it. There might be some resentment. There might be some hurt. And a lot of times, unfortunately the children are can play kind of pawns in this game and which is incredibly unfortunate so I think it's important to be willing to meet your your ex-spouse's new relationship don't be too eager though because you know you want to make sure that that person is going to be sticking around you want it to happen yes organically you don't want to force the

issue you don't want to make it uncomfortable but you got to know that there is going to be else in your child's life at some point. But at what point do you want to then invest yourself and your time and your energy to meeting that person? So I don't think it's something that has to happen right out of the gate. I don't think it has to happen even soon. But I think you want to understand who that person is, obviously to be careful of the welfare of your child. But you want to, you know, you want to know, you want to know what kind of people are going to be around your kid. Do you need to be friends with them? Do you need to golf with them? I don't think so. but I think that you want to make sure that you're aware of who is around your child,

who could be, you know, that next person that's filling in some sort of a paternal or maternal role. And just don't force it. I think let it happen organically to a certain degree, but be vigilant. It is your responsibility as a parent to make sure that your child and your child's welfare is taken care of. Mr. Wright, tell me personally, would you want your ex and your new significant other to be hanging out without you involved? So this is something I have kids and my ex and I have a very good relationship. And we've talked about this before. What is the right time to start introducing or being around a new relationship?

And I think that, you know, we both agree that it has to be. somebody that it's invested because you don't want your kids, you know, having a revolving door of new relationships of people coming in and out because they're not going to know when to invest themselves in, in that person. So it is heartbreaking to think at any point that my kids would be around a new father figure, a new influence. You know, it does. It is probably the most difficult thing for me when considering my divorce. The idea that there's going to be somebody else throwing a baseball with my child that's going to be having an experience, travel, even something as simple as a dinner when I'm not there is the hardest thing about being divorced,

is being away from your kids at all, but then supplementing somebody else is there when you're not there. So, you know, in a perfect world, you know, you would, you would always be able to be around your children, but divorce doesn't, you know, permit that, doesn't allow that. It, and it's, it's part of the evolution of moving on. And the only way that you can make it any easier is by feeling good and comfortable with whoever it is that your ex is with. And hopefully getting to know them, maybe not personally, but through reputation. through their history, through their path, all those sorts of things

can hopefully build enough confidence to make you feel comfortable. I'll never be 100% comfortable. I can tell you that. But for the sake of the kids and the sake of your ex and moving on, you have to come to grips with it.

You have to find some peace in it. And the way that I've found peace in it is hopefully knowing who that person is, what their character is, and feeling comfortable enough to let that part go a little bit. I mean, today, so after spending, you know, five days with my boys down at the beach, you know, I turned the back over, you know, to my ex. And that's a, even that in and of itself is really, really difficult.

And you think, oh, it's, you get a break. You've been single dadding for a week and now you get to, you get a break. It's like, I don't want to break. And, you know, it's a release of, I don't know, responsive. It's a release of like, I don't know, it's a very, very difficult thing. And, you know, it has to happen at some point. There's an eventuality to it, but it doesn't make it any easier. You've heard the chaos.

Now you can see it. Do we want to jump right in? Watch all your favorite podcasts from start to finish right inside the free IHartRadio app. Make some noise. Catch every laugh and eye roll on shows like Bestie Listen. Hey Jonas and Las Culturistas. Now with full video.

up there. It's the same hosts and the same chemistry with all the hilarious moments you've been missing right on your screen. Open the free IHard radio app. Search video podcasts and tap watch. What's up fam? I'm sports journalist Ari Chambers. Hey, what's up y'all? It's your girl, Sam J. And we're the host of everyone watches women's sports, a new podcast from Together and IHart Women's Sports. Because let's be real. Women's sports is giving us way too much to talk about these days. So Kelsey Finler, she became the first female. solo rower to go from California to Hawaii. My first thought is, like, what's up with the snacks?

Like, what are we eating? The highlights, the rivalries, the breakout stars, the moments that take over your entire timeline. And the conversations that start during the game and somehow keep going all week. Every week, we're breaking down the biggest stories across women's sports. Naomi Osaka showing out, she beat Sabalinka. Shout out to you, Naomi. You get the palm, Naomi.

You get the palm for that. Because we're not just interested in what happened. we're interested in why everyone's talking about it. Because everyone watches women's sports. Listen to everyone watches women's sports. On the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast. Hey, Portlandia fans. Carrie Brownstein and Fred Armisen here.

You know us, or rather you know them. Tony and Candace, Nina and Lance, Spike, and yes, the chicken. We've played a lot of iconic characters over the years, but today we're showing up as ourselves to tell you about Podlandia, AEO, rewatch, our brand new podcast. Each week we'll revisit. an episode of Portlandia from the very beginning, breaking down the sketches,

exploring the backstories of our most iconic characters, revisiting the Portland locations you know and love, and opening up about our creative process. How did any of this get made? Why do we think that was a good idea? We're ready to talk about it. And we'll also be joined by the people who helped bring it all to life. Guest stars, collaborators, and friends,

including director Jonathan Chrysall, the mayor himself, Kyle McLaughlin, legendary musician Amy Mann, and many more. Kyle is going for it here. You fully improvised, not just words, but a song, a melody. I thought he was going to write. I thought you were going to write a song. I remember you thinking that.

Listen to Podlandia. Ayo, rewatch on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Nick Totoro. You probably know me from NYPD Blue, the longest yard, or Spike Lease Black Landsman. But I'm also from Queens, which means I know pizza. And on my new podcast, delivering happiness, Nick Totoro, I deliver pizza from Prince Street pizza to a new guest.

Are you delivering pizza now? Then we sit down for a real conversation. I've shared a slice with everyone from Seth Rollins. What are you doing my belt? To Alex Rodriguez. Just to let you people know, we're talking to one of the goats here. To Bill Burr. I don't think I've ever met somebody

so exactly out of their mind as I am. And now, we even have more great guests coming up, including the great John Tuturo. It's called Happiness. Delivering Happiness. Mariano Rivera. And many, many more. Open your free high-heart radio app.

Search Delivering Happiness with Nick Tutor. And listen now. Dancing with the Stars is looking for a new pro. And since last season, I came in eighth place. I'm basically an expert. Easy there. I've spent my entire life in the ballroom. So maybe you could use some help.

I'm Danielle Fischel. And I'm Val Schmikovsky. And we have a new podcast called Stepping on Toes with Danielle and Val. Every week, we're breaking down Dancing with the Stars, the Next Pro. To find out who I'll be sharing the ball with next season. I'll be asking the questions every fan is thinking. And I'll take you behind the choreography, the judging, the performances,

and what it takes to compete in front of millions. Plus, we'll be joined by some very special guests. It's time to crown a new Dancing with the Stars Pro, so let us be your guys through this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. Do you think I could win? No. Listen to stepping on toes on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Okay, let's go to the next voicemail. My name is Sarah. I'm a single mom and I'm trying to date, but I keep meeting guys who are single dads. They don't have good relationships with their ex-wives who are the mother of their kids. My question is, is it up to me as the new girlfriend to help them bridge that gap? Yeah, this is a difficult question. And when you enter into a relationship, and let's take a step back here, even before talking about, you know, their relationship, and helping them, when you're getting into a new relationship with someone and they have been

divorced, there is a natural kind of, I don't know, like a caution flag that goes up if they don't have a good relationship with their ex. Why don't they have a good relationship with their ex? Is it really all the other person's fault? Is it all the ex's fault? Is it, do they carry none of the responsibility? So right away, that makes me a little bit nervous. And I will have some red flags start to poke up a little bit. And, you know, you want someone that, you know, in a perfect world, I think, that has a decent enough relationship with their ex to be able to co-parent, to be able to put the child first. And I've heard horror stories where, again, that the child is kind of a pawn in this game. And they're used as, you know, as a weapon against the other co-parent.

Now, whether that's with scheduling, whether that's with drop-offs or pickups, you know, or giving permission to do things or helicopter, all these different things. And it's really, it's a tragedy for the child and for, you know, for the family. So now you're, the question that Sarah had was really about what's her responsibility. You know, should she be trying to step in and help out and give advice and counsel? Well, yeah, I think as a partner, as a, as a partner, as, you know, you know, if you're dating or, you know, in a relationship, you're always wanting to give, you know, advice. But this can be a very, very touchy subject. How someone parents their child, how someone disciplines their child, how someone co-parents is very, very personal. And I would be cautious about trying to step in too much in giving your opinion. Now, you want to be supportive. You want to give, you know, as much, you know, guidance and counsel as you can, but just be careful about not being seen as meddling too much. Because, you know, that, that relationship that created that child and ultimately ended in a divorce, it has history. It has scar tissue. It has, you know,

it has a lot of, you know, a lot of history that you may not be familiar with. And to wade into it unknowingly, even with the best intentions, even because you just want to help, you might end up really making it worse. And this is one of those times when you almost have to kind of sit this one out until you're asked to step in, which I know can be so difficult when all you want to do is help. Okay, that was a great question. And we're now to our final voicemail of the day. So I just started dating a guy and he's pretty off the grid, like he doesn't have an Instagram and he's just more of a private person. But he's weird about his phone. Like, we'll be driving and I'll, like, be asking him for his phone password to put on some music or whatever.

And he gave it to me. Later, he mentioned that he had switched his phone password. Like, should I be concerned? Why is he being so weird and secretive about his phone? And this is a really, really great question and a really good comment and a really interesting perspective, which is the phone. The phone. The phone has become such a huge part of our lives. and mostly our dating lives and our relationship lives.

And once upon a time, you know, someone who used to hide a diary under the bed or something like that. But now all your secrets are held inside of a phone, who you're in talking to, what you're looking at, who, you know, what pictures do you like? All these stuff that is really very, very personal is hidden in this phone. And the expectation is this is just, you know, that's mine. It's my private space.

I am the only one that gets to know what goes on in my phone. But as you get in a relationship, of course you're going to have, someone's going to have questions about it. What are you looking at? Who are you talking to? Are you talking to you an ex-girlfriend? You know, are you, you know, are you, you know, carrying on multiple relationships? And it's almost impossible not to be suspicious if someone's not willing to share that.

Now, where does it become an invasion of privacy versus where? does it become, you're just right to know what the other person's doing, who they're talking to, and where they've been. And I, you know, I'll say like, I'm, I think that hiding a phone is hiding a secret. That's my personal perspective. If someone isn't willing to share with you what they're looking at and who they're talking to, they're probably hiding something. You know, unless they're, you know, a CIA agent, or they have. the nuclear codes, there probably isn't something important enough that they should be hiding from their significant other. Now, I get it if you're in the early stages of dating and you're just

kind of getting to know each other. And you should probably think there's probably a high likelihood that there are other people in his life or her life that they haven't let go of. But if you've been dating for a while, if you're moving on to those next logical steps of a relationship of moving in together or committing the rest of your lives together, yeah, you should know the password to their phone. You should know who they're talking to. You should know where they've been that, you know, if you're suspicious about that, you know, it's just a matter of time before that relationship ends up dissolving and falls apart. So yeah, I'd be suspicious if a phone is so important that they're unwilling to share a password and let you know what they've been up to.

Well, thanks for all those voicemails. And, you know, if you're really going through it, need some advice, you know, you're feeling lost in your divorce process. You can send us an email or leave us a voicemail. And all you've got to do is call us at 844-44-4-4-4-3-6-3. Leave us a voicemail. We'll listen to it. We'll answer it, you know, and record it, and hopefully give you a little bit of clarity. So I Do Part 2 is an I Heart Radio podcast where falling in love is the main objective. On Raiders of the Lost podcast,

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