The Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast - The Boys and Girls Tell All with Rachel Recchia, Michelle Young, Clayton Echard, Bob Guiney, Dean Unglert, and Caelynn Miller-Keyes

Episode Date: March 10, 2023

Ben and Ashley lead a confessional for some of our favorite guys and girls from Bachelor Nation!  Hear “what could’ve been” from Michelle and Rachel with the guys from their season, and you get a front row seat to all the drama when they’re reunited with Clayton! Plus, Clayton opens up about life since his break-up.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is an I-Heart podcast. Hi, my name is Enya Eumanzor. And I'm Drew Phillips. And we run a podcast called Emergency Intercom. If you're a crime junkie and you love crimes, we're not the podcast for you. But if you have unmedicated ADHD... Oh my God, perfect. And want to hear people with mental illness, psychobabble.

Yes, yes. Then Emergency Intercom is the podcast for you. Open your... free iHeartRadio app search emergency intercom and listen now this is the ben and ashley i almost famous podcast with iheart radio this is a very special episode of the almost famous podcast we are in carmel by the sea we are here thanks to hunday the hunday tucson hybrid plug-in evi is an incredible vehicle that's been with us all weekend through this journey and hunday's been with us for a lot of this year as we've had some great experiences

Ashley, I want to quickly say and tell a little story, if that's okay. I love that. So this weekend, last weekend I was at Indiana University, I brought Jessica to my alma mater for a basketball game. Kilroy's is our college bar there. It's a very popular bar. It was packed. A lot of just interaction with some incredible people, some incredible Hoosiers.

I want to give a special shout out to Michaela, Lexi, Sydney, and Jaden. They came up to me. Fans of the Almost Famous podcast. since the beginning, and they come up to me. They're like, Ben, we really love you. We love the podcast. I was like, thank you. It's so nice of you.

And they say, but we really love Ashley. It's like very sweet. I love Ashley, like obsessed with Ashley. And I said, okay, that's great. Ashley needs to hear this. I do. She needs to hear that she is so loved and that people are coming up to me telling her how awesome she is.

So we FaceTime Ashley. Ashley answers. It was like 11 o'clock on a Saturday and Dawson was in bed. Ben was calling me. I was like, what could they? Just be, you know, a call from Ben is always something. He's not calling to chat, which is totally fine. Like, we don't, I does never call people in chat.

Yeah. And Ben doesn't call me to chat either, which is, I like that. Yeah. Save our voices. Yeah, yeah. You know, we would chat on the podcast. Yeah. So this girl came on the line and she was like screaming and telling me how much she's

like loving me from the beginning, particularly in the badlands. And I'm like, this girl's in college. So that means like pretty much she's 22. below. And I'm like, were you 12 during that episode? Close to it. Probably. Yeah, close to it. But that really did make my day. No, and they loved you. The enthusiasm was unmatched. And it's nice for me. I love I love fan girls, you know, because I am a fan girl. So it just makes me feel really cool. Well, and just the fact that they've listened to the podcast. You know, we, it's a podcast is a unique medium where there is a lot of separation between us and people listening. We don't get a lot of contact with the listeners.

because we sit on a microphone. It's not like we're doing a live show or we're on stage or whatever. And so anytime you get listeners coming up and saying, I listen to your show, I love your show, it's really meaningful because we put a lot of time into the show. And as a co-host of yours,

it's incredible for me to hear them come and say, I love Ashley. Well, people come up and tell me about you being their favorite bachelor all the time as well. Yeah, but they're not saying I love him as a person. Like, he was just a good bachelor. No, they're talking about him as a person.

He was decent on TV. No. But it was awesome. So special set out to the four of them and all the others at Indiana University. It was a really special weekend. We had a great time. Got a tour of the facilities. My buddy Brandon, who is somebody I talked about a lot, who has ALS.

You can follow him at Conley Cause in his story. He's a massive IU fan. So he was able to get the tour with his wife. Is that where you met? who Brandon I know we're in high school same high school but we went back to Indiana all together had a lot of fun

again we have a big weekend in front of us thanks to Hyundai the Tucson is an incredible vehicle spacious you love the heated seats I also love the roof it opens all the way yeah that in the version that we have this week yeah that's a nice one so anyways great weekend

great vehicle great times all together again By the way, the heated seats are in the back, guys. They're back, too. I mean, that's a luxury. Come on. Luxury. We have our first friends here for the weekend. It's Dean and Kaelin. We're going to sit down with them together.

Then, Ashley, I'm going to talk to Bob and Clayton, kind of a voice chat, catch up with them. And then you're going to sit with the girls and have a talk with all of them. My boyfriend's professor is way too friendly, and now I'm seriously suspicious. Well, wait a minute, Sam. Maybe her boyfriend's just looking for extra. credit. Well, Dakota, it's back to school week on the OK Storytime podcast, so we'll find out soon. This person writes, my boyfriend has been hanging out with his young professor a lot. He doesn't think it's a problem, but I don't trust her. Now, he's insisting we get to know each other,

but I just want her gone. Now, hold up. Isn't that against school policy? That sounds totally inappropriate. Well, according to this person, this is her boyfriend's former professor, and they're the same age. And it's even more likely that they're cheating. He insists there's nothing between them. I mean, do you believe him? Well, he's certainly trying to get this person to believe him because he now wants them both to meet. So, do we find out if this person's boyfriend really cheated with his professor or not? To hear the explosive finale,

listen to the OK Storytime podcast on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. All right, Dean and Kailen are with us right now. They are two of our favorite people in the world. Dean is just always glowing. Like he always looks

like he is like just a happy guy his eyes always bright yeah our favorite golden retriever yeah I ran 10 miles this morning you guys Dean you look like you've been hit by a truck what's going on buddy well I want to blame you for this

we were at the bar at the hotel last night and you just kept making me drink more drinks this is a hangover we're watching right now I wasn't sure whether he was sick or whether or not he was just sad I was worried about your dog. Is that how you remember? I was making drinks?

I woke up thinking I was the problem, but Rachel texted me saying Ben Higgins is the problem. Goodness gracious. Ben Higgins can be a little... He can be a bad influence. He seems like an angel, but... That's great.

So I've got some reinforcements on my side. Oh my gosh. I feel like this story is not true. I think I met you guys. I think you were already there when I got there last night. You had drinks already in front of you before I even got to the hotel.

No. This is correct. No. So let's just blame me. It feels like the easy out. And I can take it. I can handle it. I would say that the amount of tired you are and how you're feeling is the sign that you had a lot of fun yesterday. Kaylin, I know you went to the spa. Yeah. I had a great spa day. Great girls day. And I'm going to have another great day. We're going to go shopping. It's a lot of girl time, which I love. I feel like we don't get that a lot. We but we're not like away from our spouses and significant others. That's so true. Yeah, it was like when we went to Tahoe. We had a great time and, you know, sometimes I need like the mommy break, you know? I don't think I need it though in the moment.

Well, yes, I do and yes, I don't. Whatever. That's another topic. I'm more concerned about Dean right now because he looks like he's going to just, I don't know what we should do with you. Well, just a couple things to catch up with you two about. Her ring is on her finger. Her ring's on her finger. Actually, I have a bone to pick with both of you guys.

Both of you guys didn't show up at our engagement party. Oh my God, they're doing it on air. I literally just talked to her about it. I just talked to her about it. And she was like, it's all fine. Oh, it's a podcast bit, guys. No, no. My wife went and I feel like when you get married, you're a unit.

And Jessica left. Yeah. Okay, Ashley, what's your excuse? Well, we already told you what our excuses. We have a child. And it would have been a long three plus days without it. Yeah, no, I get it. Nick's more important.

No. It was a certain thing, you know, the thing. You know what I mean. No, I'm totally kidding. It's actually really nice for us because it frees up some spots at the wedding. The Jessica did go to your engagement party. She said it was spectacular. She got to meet a couple of your friends.

She was really happy that she made it out. So you did have your engagement party. Yeah. And she is wearing her engagement ring. So how did you find it? It's a moisten. get a new one. This is not the one.

This is not the one. You said it's a what? Moistenite. A moistenite? A moistenite? Oh, it's like fake one. Yeah. But guess what?

They look real. I can't tell. I am all down for these moistenites. So let me ask you, why did I spend so much money on a real one? You can just get a fake one. I didn't know that it was a thing before he bought the other ones. I didn't know this was a thing until like two months ago. And now I've been seeing them everywhere.

And I'm like, oh, I would have totally rather bigger and less money. I mean, not that we had to pay for mine, but you know. The question. Thank you, Neil Lynn. yeah that's special ash but real quick before he gets upset he got a truck out of this so you're okay

you got a great truck yeah yeah okay anyways so are you done looking for the other ring have we given up hope there's one more spot I think it might be it might be in the the filter of the laundry machine you know there's like a catch all

on the laundry machine I think it might be in there like the vent cleaner that you haven't cleaned out recently haven't touched it since we moved into the house I just found out we were supposed wait like under it but like not the actual pullout

Oh, no, we do that all the time. Oh, like the vent underneath. Do you think it might be in there? Yeah. Okay. Okay, but what leads you to that belief? Just, I think it might have been like one of my pockets or something. And Caitlin might have washed it.

You don't remember taking it out of the drawer and then putting it into a pocket and then losing it? No. Why would you put it in your pocket that day? I was going to go get it mounted because it was just the gem. That's right. And yeah. We, just to clarify again, we've been missing the stone, not the actual setting. Right.

Yeah. Yeah. Which is obviously the most like, expensive part. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But that's okay. it's okay it'll turn up hey kaelin why don't you stay around and we'll bring michel and rachel in and we'll just do a little girl chat great i love the girl time girl chat just like the uh just the show do you guys are get your mics do you guys remember when you first heard what a girl chat was you're like

what's that and then you're like oh it's traumatized you reveal yourself reveal your feelings about the same man to each other okay so i actually so because i came in late right so like you know that learning that all the girls go through together after the first night and you kind of like figure out what reality TV looks like behind the scenes yeah I came in there like we all need to go for a girl chat and I remember being like what the hell is that that must have been sucky for you you weren't able to like learn together no and they hated me that's because you're so beautiful I was like why would we do that I always thought when I watched it that those were like organic conversations that people just had with each other yeah absolutely not no

Absolutely not. Did you talk to your girlfriends, though, in the house about that stuff in non-orchestrated ways? I did. Because I was really close with Cassie. And I would be like, I think I like him. She's like, I think I like him. And, you know. Yeah.

But then we can't say that on camera. We're like, I definitely like him, you know? Yeah. What about you guys? Yes, definitely. Once you got used to things. Once we got used to it. And there are times where we'd sit down on a girl chat and you'd actually have reflections that you'd go through.

sometimes but they definitely happen more organically off the camera or like off the couches let me just say off the couches yeah and then you're whispering and you're being really honest I think I only whisper good things I don't remember oh you know what I talked about with my girls was just to other girls

I don't think I talked about Chris Sol so much did you guys talk more gossip or like actually about your lead oh god Like off the, you know, I have two bachelorette here. So I mean when you're a part of The Bachelor. I feel like for mine, I would always talk about how I like felt more. Like obviously there's gossip. Like you're always talking about everything.

But I was super invested. And I feel like I was talking to women who are also super invested. And it was so weird because I remember feeling like we were talking about different people. It was almost like you know you're talking about the same person. But you're so delusional at that point in that journey that you're like, it doesn't feel like that's hilarious that's good stuff thanks for letting us know that i am delusional though no but i think that's the only way that you can like be friends with you know as close as you are with the girls you have to be like you're dating someone else you just have to like put that in your mind

you know well especially with you and cassie being you know first and then fourth you guys must have like really been in a weird spot because you knew he was taking you both so seriously and then i guess rachel you too yeah like with your three girls girls. Yeah. Yeah, we would always all talk. I don't know. It just, I don't know. I just go. Michelle is so different. Why does she like, why is everything so cringe? It's so it's not cring. No, it's, I'm not, okay, I'm not cringing. It's, it's just, I had such an abnormal experience. Because you came in late? Because it's all because of that. Honestly. Okay. So to kind of like paint a quick picture, right? You come in late. There's a natural barrier, barrier right off the bat. I come in late. I get the one-on-one. Okay, so right away.

Yeah. Target. That target, right, instantly instilled as I'm seen as this like B squad of a group that really was supposed to be part of the A squad. We were there since night one. Lee just was very overwhelmed. And so it had that natural barrier. I was so close with Ryan Claytor, who I came in with.

But then she was sent home a few weeks later. Eventually down the road, I did. I became close with Bree Springs. But then remember our season finale, it was all about this race scandal. So it's like the people that you become close with, it was just a really weird situation where there are all these intense barriers that I'm close with them now. But as far as like opening up during the entire season, I really, really was guarded because I felt that target from night one and it really didn't let up.

The only time it led up is when shit hit the fan and Matt found out that people were saying some really nasty things across the board about everybody and that's when people kind of like reeled it in quite a bit. But it's so funny because it's like the camaraderie and that people talk about, I... You didn't have. It wasn't there.

It wasn't there. And the people who really did. And it was there with Ryan. It was there with Bree Springs. But it was very much turned into like a nasty girl fight. kind of concept and then moving forward once it was checked then it was all about race and screen time and all these like major major issues diversity issues that as it was you know we bonded but we bonded over different things than the typical season that's why like sad about that when

you hear other people's stories um honest i can't change it so no i have to accept what it is like you're given the cards that you're given and so i can sit here and feel upset and i yeah i get salty about not being able to travel the world but but other than that that's the one thing that's the one thing that I will joke about I'm salty about but really essentially like I can't change any of it so if I sit here and feel bad and sorry for myself it's like I'm only hurting myself I'm wasting my energy nothing I could do really like you just kind of handle it as you go I forgot that you're but it's just weird I mean Chris was yeah Chris was that whole thing with Chris and Lindsay or sorry Chris and Rachel Lindsay that all took place like

my yeah but I'm talking about your bachelor's your bachelor's you were a bubble season I was a bubble season I was a bubble season I was the one person me and Katie Thurston which okay but me

you know oh give us the no it's not a detour you know we were the two people who didn't travel and Tasia Tasia Tasia but she traveled as a contestant so she got the great places

Nemacolin and Minnesota and Mexico baby redo for Michelle. I'm calling it now. No, no. I'll trouble myself. Well, Michelle, why am I drawing a blank? Where did they take your season place, your own season?

I was in Palm Springs. The desert is 110 degrees. But it was the craziest shit I've ever felt in my life. I've never been out there. I was out there for Taceous for like five days. I've never felt anything like that before in the summer in August. Oh, my gosh. Yeah.

And then they brought me back to Minnesota. Oh, that's right. And that's it? But you said Mexico too. And then Mexico is where I got engaged. Yeah. But you had a couple little spots. Yeah.

Yeah. No, I'm grateful. But Mexico, did you go to Salilita? You went to, like, where Paradise is built. She's so bitter and I love this ass. I'm not bitter. I'm not bitter. It's just like, it is okay for me to acknowledge that it's unfortunate, you know,

because it's like, shit, I didn't come out with a relationship. No, it's not, I don't want to use the word bitter either. It's just like. I laugh about it. Rachel and I laugh about it. No relationships, no stamps in the passport. Like, damn. Hey, I'm speaking for myself.

I did to get to travel, but I was on a boat and I didn't really get to get off that boat. That cruise looked awesome because I'm a huge cruiser, but like, was it? Oh, really? Then it wouldn't have been cool. I don't think it would have been cool for your first one. See, I think of cruises where I would be like in my early 20s and have cruise boyfriends for a week and I'd like pretend to be Jack and Rose. Basically, we would just be like run rampant and like, it'd be like such a whirlwind romance

and just knowing that I was going to end at the end of the end of that. the week kind of like made it even more romantic. But you did have a lot of those boyfriends. You thought it would last, but then they'd never text you afterwards. And hopefully you both make it out alive at least. Yeah, exactly. Watch the sunrise as we pull into final ports and you make promises about face-timing each other.

Oh my God. And then you realize that they have a girlfriend back at home and they don't tell you about. Well, that also happens on the show too. Oh my God. That's so true. Okay. But like what was that experience like being on the

ship did you like yeah was it just did it feel like if you're about a hotel um it was just different because like we did get to travel on clayton season so we would go to these amazing places and have rose ceremonies in these historical buildings by the water and for being in the boat which it was amazing it was awesome we didn't have to go through the airport but we didn't really get to see as much because we're so far away from these cities so we really i feel like only got to explore paris because we did stay in paris but then we got on the boat there and then it was kind of more centralized on the Virgin Voyages valiant lady shout out listen guys you both have like made me think this and I'm dying to have an answer why am I scared right now I'm like I'm scared

we're joking now about how you guys ended up with no one and you didn't travel enough and all that do you look back at your cast and ever wonder what if with someone. Come on, please. Yes. Okay, yay. Absolutely. For me, a hundred percent. Both of them. Hell no. Oh, no. Who am I going back to? You tell me, who am I going back to? Pull up the rasta. Who am I going back to? Okay. I'm sorry. Do you, are you now giving us tea that you weren't down for, you were upset with the cast? I would, no, I wasn't, no, I truly, I wasn't upset with the cast. I had a lot of wonderful guys on my season. I truly, truly did. But I figure, I, I definitely figure out whether someone is my person or not so quickly or whether they're if they're just

flat out not my person you know you can go on a first date with somebody and you instantly know in the first 10 minutes sitting down yeah right like by the time I got to the end of it I knew the relationship I wanted to pursue and all the other ones it's like all doors are closed on those ones it's not like I would go back like how did you pretend no it took me it did take me a minute to figure I didn't pretend necessarily but But it took me, I kept everything open, but like when I shut the door, like what I really did accept that proposal from Nate, all other doors were closed. Oh, yeah. And I'm not at a, I don't ever seeing any of the other doors opening.

I guess is what I'm saying. Okay. But I had a, no, I had an awesome, awesome, nice guys and everything like that. But, yeah, no. I get it. Like, you could tell immediately. Like, so there was. Yeah, not an, yeah.

Not immediately, but like. You're going to door, close doors. Closing doors. Yeah. Once the door is closed, the door's closed. Okay, great. I was torn. I was very torn.

And it was like a very hard, like, I mean, it's a hard decision for everyone. But I remember looking back, like, there were so many different avenues and different lives that you could have with each person. And obviously you look back and you think that, but I also think it might be different because, like, you and Nate obviously did have a relationship after the show. My relationship was over very quickly before my show was even over. So, of course, you're watching these relationships back and thinking, like, what would my life be with each

different person? Because I really did have some great amazing men on my season too. So obviously don't regret anything, but what happened with Avin after you guys had that moment on after the final rose? I know. Everyone always asked that. We just were friends and it really was coming from a place

I think of him just wanting to like be there and support me and we'll always support each other. But I mean as far as relationships go, I think the show is already starting off on pretty rock ground. So to start off already kind of on the foot you're on, I think we'll always just be friends. So did you have hopes at all that you would be more in that moment? Or did you kind of know

it was a stage moment? I don't think it was a stage moment. Like, I mean, I think a lot of people want to say that. And I don't know, I think it was him just wanting to be there and support me. And honestly, like I would have, like I always said, I would have ran off that stage with Jesse Palmer with anyone. I really wanted to get off that stage. It was just a really hard moment. moment. So to have him there, it was, it was really, really nice. Did you feel any guilt in that moment for Tino? Because I feel like a lot of us out there just maybe not guilt. Did you just like have empathy for him in that moment? Because I think a lot of us just didn't like the way not you, but the show handled that. Yes. I think all around it was what I just want to believe is a

miscommunication. But like what I've always said is I had absolutely no idea that Avan was even there because that was a week after I spoke to him. All I knew that day was that I was talking to Tino and I was getting off the stage. The way they went about it, I don't think was right. I don't think anyone should ever be in a position where they, exactly. And I think coming off of that, a lot of people put that blame on Avin and me. And it was, I don't know who you could blame at the end of the day, but it was no one's intent to ever make him feel like that. And I know even now Avin and Tino, I've seen that they're, they're friends again.

And so I think there's no bad blood, hopefully, across the board. Yeah. I don't even think Tino thought that way. I think that a lot of the viewers also have enough blinders off to know that that was like a production move and not anything on your part or Avin. Well, you'd be surprised. But I know I would be surprised. It was like they really thought me and Avin just had this plan.

I didn't even know he was there and just saw him out of the corner of my eye. And I was just like, whoa. Like what is happening? Everyone was just really shocked. So. Yeah. All right. Ben is going to take over with the guys, and they're going to talk about some serious stuff.

My boyfriend's professor is way too friendly, and now I'm seriously suspicious. Wait a minute, Sam. Maybe her boyfriend's just looking for extra credit. Well, Dakota, it's back to school week on the OK Storytime podcast, so we'll find out soon. This person writes, my boyfriend has been hanging out with his young professor a lot. He doesn't think it's a problem, but I don't trust her. Now he's insisting we get to know each other, but I just want her gone. Now, hold up.

Isn't that against school policy? That sounds totally inappropriate. Well, according to this person, this is her boyfriend's former professor and they're the same age. And it's even more likely that they're cheating. He insists there's nothing between them. I mean, do you believe him? Well, he's certainly trying to get this person to believe him because he now wants them both to meet. So, do we find out if this person's boyfriend really cheated with his professor or not?

To hear the explosive finale, listen to the OK Storytime podcast on the IHeart Radio app, podcast or wherever you get your podcast. One of my favorite things that we ever get to do is get together in person and we're doing it right now in Carmel by the Sea. Thanks to Hyundai. I got Bob Guinea. I got Clayton with me here. We played a little golf yesterday.

We took the Hyundai, Tucson, plug-in hybrid EV to the golf course. I mean, Bob, I want to talk to you first. Yes, sir. talk to you about Clayton okay okay let's not just be mindful this is right next to you so uh this is the first time I've ever been with Clayton in person we did take the car to the the golf course yep um Clayton is a massive human is a big man and I mean did that vehicle give him enough space so here's what's really interesting Clayton and I are in the back seat together we're both tall I'm

six three I'm gonna say you're about six six six six six five but I'm gonna be honest now Yeah, yeah, it was a little bit of... So, with the hair left. Yes, yes. I swear we both had tons of leg room. And, by the way, all of our clubs were in the back. The trunk space was unbelievable. Yeah.

And outside of the vehicle, which was an incredible experience when we got there. Clayton, your golf swing, okay? Yeah, beautiful. We were watching you on the range. You've got muscles in your back. I think Bob might have them. No, I do not. I've never seen those.

Bob does have, but he has a ton of charisma. It's just a beautiful thing. And he brought the muscles out. Like, I was flexing extra hard just to... I did so see you kind of. Yeah, because I'm like, I got to match up to this guy somehow. But your muscles in your back, Clayton, I believe, are restrictive for the golf swing. In fact, I like to stay limber loose and have, you know, lack of muscles.

That's how I work. So that, yeah, so that we can really get that club back with the through. Full swing, full extension. Yeah, I would actually say your muscles are restricting you from getting that golf club. Yeah, okay, what kind of interviews this? I want to say this, too. Hold on now. Clayton showed up here.

I mean, it's 54 degrees yesterday. Not what you would expect in California And Clayton comes out to play golf He's got on shorts And a short sleeve shirt Yes I did So I loaned him Some of my apparel

Because I overpack I'm on Victoria's over there And my stuff has never looked so good Honestly God I was like I almost didn't even want to take it back Because Clayton's like Here you go here it is back

I'm like no I don't think I should wear that anymore Because you've now been seen in it And clearly I don't make it look like that Like the arms on me When I put that jacket on it It looks like there's tons of room You saved that story You say that I really thought

you're going to say was my lack of judgment coming out here with no oh not at all and you saved it i mean you just saw you're going to california i hear you didn't realize that california is pretty much north to south when it comes to the west side of the united states we're pretty north yeah and i listen i was talking to when i was coming to san francisco not even close yeah monterey so man from the midwest i'm just going to go ahead and claim that you know it's 20 years my life in missouri now i'm getting shown new things wearing bob's sweaters it's a beautiful day yeah well i'll never never look the same Clayton, you know, obviously you are a very recent bachelor.

We can't call you the current Bachelor any longer because Zach's season has started to air. Over the last year of being the Bachelor, obviously you have Bob here who is a good mentor, a good friend to many who have been leads, including myself. But you probably, I'm assuming, haven't been able to be around a lot of other Bachelor people in the last year, maybe, especially for a whole weekend like this. No, I haven't. I haven't, like, now I'm starting to get kind of hooked into all these different groups of individuals that, I mean, I kind of have a little fomo because I hear a lot of stories happening. And I'm like, oh, what's that? And you're like, no, you'll pick it up eventually. You know, so, yeah, it's like, yeah, I'm the rookie, right? I'm the new guy. No, no real hazing besides, not yet at least. I guess I still have no 24 hours. I think what's interesting about Clayton, and I mean this isn't a complimentary way, you have no ego about things, which I think if I had some of your experiences, I mean, you played in the NFL. You know, you've done a lot of, I'd probably have a lot more, I might be more standoffish to people than you are. You are so, you're like, I've never really played golf, but here we go, and crushed it. He had some moments yesterday when we did the scramble format that we actually used his shot and the guys played three times in his life. Yeah. She's a really good athlete. No, I would agree. The lack of eagles. You've been around. longer than I have but you know at this point I've been around a while in this world too ego is it feels like a familiar um characteristic of a lot of people that come off to show

big egos um a little bit standoffish uh expect to be given things right Clayton hasn't shown that at all no very gracious so for you Clayton how has it been now being around I mean Rachel's here obviously you did know Rachel yeah but a lot of people you haven't been around here with in person or probably ever met how has it been being around these other contestants just hanging out having fun there's no there's nothing that you need to do here other than enjoy yourself yeah well i think this is something that um we all can attest to and often uh you see people on tv and i had seen a lot of you guys on tv prior or heard of you and maybe i saw an hour or two of who i thought you were and um coming out here it shows me i won't say a

completely different picture but there's just so much more to us right we're multifaceted individuals and it's been really cool and everything that I thought maybe people might have been has been challenged when I sit down with them. There's a lot of great individuals that are kind-hearted,

have sacrificed the ego. I think we all have had in situations where we've come to that place where, yeah, people put us up on pedestals and then we realize that sometimes when you're on a large stage, like these insecurities, weaknesses can come out and you learn a lot about yourself.

And I feel that everybody I've met here has kind of went through that journey where they've struggled, then they found themselves, and now they're in this place where they're just very confident in their own abilities. And it's really refreshing to see that as the new guy that's just on the other side of it. I see that years ahead. And I go, okay, like, it's going to be okay. I'm going to be fine. These individuals have found their way, and I will too. So it's been really cool to see that. Yeah, Bob and I can do it. You can do it too. Yeah, there we go. Yeah.

You know, Bob, we had a great conversation on the way to the golf course yesterday. I'd love for you to speak to it. We talk about a lot within the bachelor world. And I think weekends like this have always been healthy for me because you do get to humanize and see people for who they are and maybe what they're about and maybe not what you've heard or what you've maybe seen on social media. But with this world or with even going to high school today and middle school today, comparison is such a prevalent thing. You're comparing yourself to everybody else. And if you're any type of critic, you're going to be your harshest critic. And you're going to compare yourself and say they're doing so much greater things than I ever will do or have done.

We talked about on the way to the course yesterday because everybody in that car, yourself, myself, Clayton, Blake, Dean, Wells have all felt this way before, right? It's a great advice. So, you know, when you look at somebody like Clayton, who's just new to this, what would you tell somebody like him who's comparing himself to all these people? Well, I think the biggest thing that we talked about too is that, you know, social media is is everybody's best part of their day right like you don't ever generally see people posting things like man i'm having a rough time today right they're always like this happened and this

it's always the highlight reel of what they're doing and sometimes the perception of what comes with that highlight real can make you feel inferior you know and we were talking about it yesterday we're like you know it's not what you think it's not what you've heard it's not the stories that you heard about this person and this person doing this and this and not exactly how it went But, you know, it takes a lot more energy to go around and try and correct everybody. So you just let the positive stuff flow and, you know, hope for the best. But it's really about being comfortable with yourself, staying focused on what you are already doing, by the way. Focusing on something that you know makes you special and different, you know, with your talk about mental health and your passion for that and your passion for your fitness and building your fan base and your following based off of those things and, you know, creating your own niche and then just really growing within that.

And, you know, I think you're going to do great with it. I mean, we talked about it yesterday. And we've all kind of got things that make us a little bit different. The common thread, of course, being The Bachelor, right? Which gave us a platform and gave us an opportunity to talk about stuff. But the stuff you're passionate about is going to be different than some of the things that I might be passionate about or Dean or whatever. But, you know, the way you talk about it, the way you embrace it and the way that you take the community that you've sort of been placed into, now it's on you, right? And whatever you do with it is your own.

And I think, I mean, from what we talked about yesterday, everyone in that car, I was very impressed with none of us were, you know, keeping up with a Jones type mentality. where I'm like, no, find your own place, grow, and you know, you'll get there. You know, it's just whatever you want to do. And you've got a voice, use it, you know. Yeah. And you're doing it. Yeah, and I think it was really refreshing to have everyone just kind of shoot straight. Because I think when you try to keep up with the Jones, then like that individual walks

out of that or leaves that car and they think, okay, here we go. Like now I just heard all this new information and now I'm going to analyze it. And social media has been interesting. I just want to share my story because I kind of, I want to show individuals from one side to the other. Prior to the show, I had a thousand followers or whatever. I'd get maybe 20 likes on a post. And if I got 80, I was like, oh, that's really cool. Now it's like I started to post mental health stuff. It wasn't getting the same response as when I was posting with my now X. And I thought no one wants to see this. And I was upset because I went from getting

60,000 likes down to 3,000. And it's all about perspective, though. And that's what I think you guys have instilled in me and I've started to realize is, you know, if you get 3,000 likes on a mental health post, that's 3,000 individuals lives that you're impacting, plus whoever else just saw it and didn't click like. And so it's just been about reframing and shifting that narrative. And unfortunately, for a lot of us, compares to culture, it's rampant. We can see people across the world now. It used to be you could just see people in your own town. Now it's like over the entire world. And so every day you click online and you go down this rabbit hole and the algorithm knows how to show you similar things. So you click one person, it shows you 10 more and you end up

finding yourself not being happy because you're like, I want to look like that. So it's been an experience. but I think talking about it helps us understand that like we're not alone and you guys have went through this to some capacity and much of you guys to a greater capacity with the amount of followers. And so I think it's just the more we talk about it, the more we're able to make sense of it. And then it's just you don't feel like you're the only one going through it. There's a weird switch. I was given some really great advice a few years ago because you're right. You know, when you come off the show, you are very popular. Your social media is blowing. up. You know, you get invited to a lot of appearances. And then when that starts to fade away,

you start to maybe at that point, like, you are focused on things that you really care about. Okay, what do I want to do with this platform that's been handed to me for no reason other than the fact that I went on a dating show. I have this amazing gift now. What am I going to do with it? And everybody who's done it well, I think chooses a lane like Bob was saying. You know, that might not be the most popular lane. That might not be the lane that's going to get you on television or get you paid the most. But it's a lane. So you choose your lane. So you choose your lane. and that lane's typically a little more niche and the likes and the followers

aren't growing at the same rate they maybe once did. And I was struggling with that. I was having really hard time with it because I was feeling like what I cared about, nobody else cared about. And they only cared about me because of my time on the show and because of my ability

to date poorly. And somebody sat me down, a mentor from the show and they said, I hear all this. And it's true. Not as many people are interested in liking your picture or inviting you this because of these niche you've chosen. But, Ben, why are you doing it? I said, well, because I care about people. I want to sell coffee and give it back because I really love people and I love being a part of their stories. And I think in 40 years from now, what I want to tell my grandkids is not

that I was on a dating show. It's that I was involved in this story and this project. And he said, okay. Ben, you care about people if one person, if one person's life is better because of the work that you did. If one of those likes is one human that says, I hear Ben, I see Ben, and now I feel less alone, it's all been worth it. That's how valuable that platform is. And so for you, Clayton, you're doing this because you care about the mental health of others and yourself and the physical fitness of others and yourself. And if one person on there likes that picture because their life has been bettered because of the story you told, it's all worth it. Yeah. That's the biggest amount fame you could ever get that you change somebody's life in a positive way yeah and yeah and i'm seeing

that i think it's just uh it's just being able to will ultimately find uh that self-love and that self-belief that you know that i don't doesn't matter how many followers i have it just because i have a fraction of the followers of somebody else doesn't mean that my less my message is less important uh it can be even more it can be just as impactful and we're in different categories and i don't have to be this individual and i would post it first for what i thought people wanted and i didn't have that satisfaction when I started posting what I enjoyed and what I thought would be helpful and I got those one or two messages

that's what kept me moving. So, but it's just, yeah, I mean, I think you have to set those parameters in place where if you feel that looking at a certain account is negative, then okay, maybe I can block this. I mean, we have the ability to hide certain people's profiles, but be more mindful of what it is your intake because what's coming across our screens every day

is impacting us whether we're, you know, consciously aware of it or not. So I've had to take measures where I said, okay, hey, like limit the screen. screen time. Don't look at certain accounts. You're not that person, but you don't need to be that person. You're never going to be that person. You should just stay in your own lane and be yourself. But that just takes time. I think it's you put yourself in a foreign environment and you're just trying to figure out first how this game's played. I didn't know anything about social media. I got an Instagram just because all my friends finally got off Facebook. So I'm like, okay, I guess I'm like one of the last ones here. I need to like snoop now. I got to create an account on Instagram. So I created that. And that was all I knew. And then all of a sudden, all these analytics came with it. And you're just like, what is this? And it's a beast. Well, I would guess, too, I mean, being so fresh off the show, you're probably still very sensitive to critique and, you know, things people say who have no clue who you are. You know, I think I said it yesterday. And I don't know if I said it in front of them, but I was like, I was one time told. And I mean, it was the best advice I ever got about that stuff because I was late to social media. It wasn't even around when I was The Bachelor, of course.

But it was like, someone basically said to me, you know, you're living your life and everyone else is going to comment on you living your life, right? So what does that say? You know, it says that they're paying attention to how you're living your life, but they don't know you. So they're something they don't like that you do. Like maybe you found a puppy today and you were, you know, maybe they're cat people. So they think you suck because you like puppies, you know? I mean, it can be that sensitive. It's not that far off, right?

It's not that far off because people comment on everything. Yeah. And I will tell you with time comes perspective, right? and obviously I've got a lot of time in between the time I was on the show and now and I think that you'll find that because I think you talked about this too I'd see like 20 nice things

I wouldn't even, it would go in one ear or not the other I'd see one negative thing and it would stick with me for days and it would literally drive me crazy like a thorn in my shoe or something I'd be like oh my God, you know, a pebble my shoe and you'll get to the point as you grow further away from the show

where it won't bother you as much because I don't know if it's if it means we're desensitized to it or what? Yeah, I mean, that's, you're right. I don't want to say you become callous, because I think callous means hard-hearted, and I don't think that's a place you want to get, but there's a period where you'll probably feel that way,

but you just get perspective, you start understanding your own intentions more. Like, why did I care about this thing? Well, I want to bring in somebody now who is also a part of The Bachelor World, my wonderful co-host, Ashley. We've had a great little guys talk here with Clayton and Bob. Ashley is joining us.

And Ashley, I mean, coming on hot. I didn't want to jump in. Hi, Clayton. Nice to meet you in. You know, we want a little time down here with the boys. We want to bring Ashley in now because this is a weekend.

Thanks to Hyundai with the Almost Famous podcast. We've had an incredible weekend. The guys and the girls spending time together. Ashley, we're just talking about mental health and criticism. And I want to bring you in. But I also, before I do want to ask. Clayton, you know, when did this become the pursuit that you wanted to have? I mean, I'm really interested because we saw you as The Bachelor. You obviously went through a public

breakup. That's not fun, not ideal. But everybody in this room's had one. You're not alone there. So when did it hit for you that this next lane, this lane was the one that you were going to jump into and really focus on? Yeah. So for me, I've been pretty open to talk about my struggles offline. I started doing that in college, talking about body dysmorphia to my friends, and we were just having these mature conversations, and I felt very comfortable doing so. And so when I went on this show, I was open to the women about it, was well-received. And then when everything happened and the ending occurred, and I was in a really bad spot, I at first was very defensive. Any criticism that came my way, even if it was constructive, I wasn't willing to listen. And I was

just thinking like as we were meeting in person i'm like remember the last conversation we had uh it was tense for me because i was on the defense uh and i heard uh gaslighting and that term just like i was like worst connotation of it trigger word yeah and i'll never forget as i as i was thinking about okay we're going to be you know having this talk again and i realized i just wasn't in a position to um be able to set my ego aside i was so defensive and i just wanted to rid myself of any negative commentary. And so I was in defense mode, but because I was defending myself, I wasn't allowing myself to accept impact for what I had done. And I started kind of going through after the show where I was just becoming really reflective. And I said, okay, maybe there is some constructiveness amongst the

criticism that I can take and find my insecurities and weaknesses because people are saying things about me. Not all of them have to be true, but maybe there are some things that are. And I found out that yeah like a lot of my insecurities were rooted in being a people pleaser since being a kid when I was bullied and I had body dysmorphia and I was trying to please individuals I didn't like the way I looked physically so I was like if I don't like the way I look why would people like me for who I am so I attacked my physicalness and then I started to attack the emotional side of it but there were things that I lacked that were online that I saw and unknowingly I was doing I wasn't purposely trying to be malicious I wasn't purposely trying to hurt people but I did and so as I

became started to accept all this i found this sense of peace washed over me i wasn't looking at first i was waiting for people to apologize for me instead of just forgiving myself for what i had done and i started to feel this growth and this just like anger be released i'm like i no longer have to wait for someone to apologize i will forgive myself for that interaction and it just started bringing this this happiness to me and so i thought well okay i can just share my journey as i'm going through it with others and if they see how I was able to get out of this situation and I'm happier after everything that I went through then maybe others can go okay if he can do that I as well can similar to like what you guys said earlier that's great and I just I'm like why not to share powerful you know

document it show it to other people and hopefully it'll get individuals to have the conversation yeah and that's what it's all about the more people talk about it the more they can relate uh I think the more that people the less they feel alone more connected they feel and the more likely they're able to better manage their mental health as they build that support system. I think everybody's got insecurities too, right? And sometimes when you're put in this situation, people don't think that you would have them, right? Because, oh, he's the bachelor guy. He did this or whatever. So being that vulnerable, I think, is a great thing to do. Yeah, we're excited about your pursuit, be encouraging you on your pursuit. Great things you're

up to. A lot of cool things ahead. Well, Clayton, thanks for sitting with us. Bob, obviously, part of the Almost Famous Family. You're a great co-host, great friend. You're a great boss. I'll tell you that. I mean, just discipline. You and Ashley are two of my favorite bosses I've ever had. We just forced discipline.

And that's what makes us great. Well, with that, this has been the Almost Famous Podcast. I've been Ben. I've been Ashley. We'll talk to you very soon. We have some great content coming your way. So, hey, keep downloading. Follow the Ben and Ashley I, Almost Famous Podcast,

on iHeartRadio or subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts. Hi, my name is Enya Yumanzoor. And I'm Drew Phillips. And we run a podcast called Emergency Intercom. If you're a crime junkie and you love crimes, we're not the podcast for you. But if you have unmedicated ADHD... Oh my God, perfect. And want to hear people with mental illness, psychobabble.

Yes, yes. Then Emergency Intercom is the podcast for you. open your free iHeart radio app search emergency intercom and listen now this is an iHeart podcast