The Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast - The Green Flags You NEED In Your Next Relationship with Ashley Hebert & Whitney Angel: Will You Accept This Advice?

Episode Date: May 21, 2026

Bachelor Nations Ashley and Whitney discuss the green flags people should look out for when dating, and Trista shares the key elements that have made her marriage long lasting. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Well, we didn't invent it. We just contributed to it. We're the first people to do podcasts. We get to ask other people questions because we're sick and tired of being asked questions. Well, sick and tired is a strong way to put it. But, you know, tired and sick. Listen to Hey Jonas on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. Just listen. We don't care where you hear it. Another podcast from some SNL late-night comedy guy, not quite.

Unhumor me with Robert Smygel and friends. Me and hilarious guests from Jim Gaffigan to Bob Odenkirk to David Letterman, help make you funnier. This week, my guest, SNL's Mikey Day and head writer, Streeter Seidel, help an a cappella band with their between songs banter. The worst singer in the group? The worst? Yeah.

Me. Is there anything to the idea that because you're from Harvard, uh, you only got in because you're, Parents made a huge donation. The group. The yard birds, right? That's the name. The Harvard Yardt Yardt.

They're open. Do you have a name suggestion? We're open. Since you guys are middle age, one erection. Listen to humor me with Robert Smygel and Friends on the I-Heart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. Humor me. I need some jokes to make me seem funny.

Hey, I'm. I'm Dr. Maya Shunker, a cognitive scientist and hosts of the podcast, a slight change of plans, a show about who we are and who we become when life makes other plans. I wish that I hadn't resisted for so long the need to change. We have to be willing to live with a kind of uncertainty that none of us likes. You can have opinions. You can have like a strong stance. And then there's your body having its own program. Listen to a slight change of plans on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

This is the almost famous podcast with IHartRadio. Hi, everybody. It's Trista, and I'm back with Ashley A. Bear and Whitney Angel. Can I say something else? Like, this might be controversial. And I don't know if you feel this way. Think of everything that's been going on lately. Like, think about, like, sorry, not to get political.

I'm not trying to, but I'm just going to say. The Epstein files. Like, look at, like, all the men spending so much money on OF. Like... Wait, what's OF? Only fans. Oh. I know that thing.

No, like, there's, like, this... Or the feet picks. I feel like there's a lot of these underground things with men. Like, weird things with men. So there's part of me as a woman's like, oh, hell no. Like, you don't know what you're getting into. No, no, no, no. I'm being serious. Like, there's a part of me that I know you're not supposed to generalize all men, but there's a lot of men doing some weird stuff.

Anyone else? Anyone else thinking when they're dating? I'm thinking about that. You go on a date and you're worried. You're like, what? Are you in the Epstein files? Are you on only fans? Like, how are you spending your money?

Like, I don't know. Maybe it's like conspiracy theory, but like for me, I'm like, men. there's something going on like with men. You're, you know what? Okay, we've got to get you back. We're going to rein you back into, you know, kind of how you were before. Like, men trust issues after seeing all this stuff. Yeah, I mean, I get that.

But also take me and Whitney as people who you can, you know, be assured there are good men. There are good men. Yeah. They're good men, Ashley. I promise. I bet you guys have good men. I do. But, but.

You never know. I see Ricky staring at my feet tonight. You're going to be like, where do that money go? It's like, what's this payment for not just joking? JK. J.K. J.K. But there's part of me that has like this weird feeling. I don't know.

Hopefully it'll pass. There's just too many like men things happening. right now. Yeah, I mean, I hear that. It's a lot. It's a lot. Like, it would be like a safer. I feel like maybe you should be. I think we are just going to be smarter. Is that what you Yeah. Right. So you just have to be smarter, Ashley. You just have to be like, you just have to be like, listen, I'm not dealing with this and I'm not dealing with this and I'm not dealing with this. Let me see your credit card. Let me go in your dresser. Right. After the first day, you're like, so to get on a second date, these are the things that have to do.

Let me check your secrets on your phone. Yeah. Okay, Whitney, so next year is 10 years, right? With Ricky? 10 years. Yes. I don't know where the time has gone. That's great.

That's amazing. So what are the green flags that you saw in your husband and still see to this day? Oh, I have so many. I mean, I just, I don't, want to be that girl, but I really do. I mean, he just... Oh, come on. Be that girl. Yes, be that girl. From the very beginning, I think the number one thing was the steadiness, as I mentioned before. No games, no questioning, emotional stability and safety. That to me is important because I was coming out of something that I felt completely out of control and in-state plan. So that's number one.

number two is that he is a great dad and you know i see him when we're talking about having fun he's always the first person out there like having fun with the kids i i almost look up to him i'm like wow i look up to how you are a dad like because i didn't have that growing up i didn't have a fatherly figure so i see that in him and that is something that fills my cup but more than anything is that he he listens to me i think that's another thing even when things are not necessarily like going swimmingly in life. You know, I feel that I can confidently sit down and be honest about how I'm feeling and he listens.

We don't always have all the answers. We don't always see IDI. But just having someone that say, I'm going to listen to how you're feeling and then we can kind of conquer this together. And I feel like I truly just have a teammate in life. Again, it's not always perfect. It's not always rainbows and butterflies. I'm not sitting here trying to pretend that it is.

But I do feel confident that there's nothing that I couldn't come to him with or bring to him that we couldn't attack together, unless it's feet picks. That is I think that we would not be able. That would definitely not work. Sorry, I shouldn't have brought that up. I love it. I do like what you're saying, there are good guys out there. And I have, yeah. Are there though? Are there? Yes, there are. Maybe not in Miami. No, I'm just kidding. That's my problem. I'm living in Miami. Ashley, I know. I was there for seven years. I had to leave to find my guy. Yes, exactly.

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Huge news. We created our own podcast called, Hey, Jonas. We invented a podcast? Well, we didn't invent it. We just contributed to it. We're the first people to do podcasts. Pretty, yeah, pretty wide range of podcasts throughout there. But this one's extra special.

So how do we actually come up with? the name hey Jonas guys. I honestly don't remember. I think it was on a call about what we should call it. We were thinking I'm originally calling it one of the early names of our band before Jonas Brothers was... This is how you guys remember it going down? Yes.

I have a very different memory of this. We were talking about a thing, a bit for the podcast where people could call in and say, Hey Jonas. And then I wrote down on my little notepad, Hey Jonas, Jonas, and offered it up as a potential title for the podcast. But thanks for remembering that, guys. Listen to Hey Jonas on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast.

Just listen. We don't care where you hear it. Another podcast from some SNL late-night comedy guide. Not quite. Unhumor me with Robert Smygel and friends. Me and hilarious guests from Jim Gaffigan to Bob Odenkirk to David Letterman, help make you funnier. This week, my guest, SNL's Mikey Day and head writer Streeter Seidel, help an Acapella band with their between songs banter.

There's the worst singer in the group. The worst? Yeah. Me. Is there anything to the idea that because you're from Harvard, you only got in because your parents made a huge donation. The group. The yard birds, right?

That's the name. The Harvard Yard. But they're open. Do you have a name suggestion? We're open. Since you guys are middle-aged. One erection. Listen to humor me with Robert Smigel and Friends on the I-Heart Radio app,

Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcast. Humor me. I need some jokes to make me seem funny. What about you, Trista? What are your green flags? Trista, let's hear it. I mean, I feel like very similar to yours in that he's just a good guy. You know, I was very attracted to how genuine he was and his integrity and his willingness

to do the right thing. I mean, he's a firefighter, so like, that kind of comes with the territory. So I wanted someone who was a good person. And because I had been hurt in previous relationships, I really wanted to protect my heart. So looking for those flags of like someone who, you know, isn't going to hurt you that you feel safe with, like at your core you feel safe with. He was kind of my, not kind of, like I think I even said it in my wedding. Val's like, he just made me feel safe like a safety blanket, you know. And we have so much fun going back to the fun. We, you know, he is my best friend and he is somebody that I have fun with. He makes me

laugh. I think that's the one of the biggest green flags is if someone can make you laugh. Like I, I need that in my life, especially now. And it's, it's just so important to like, be able to find joy because there are going to be hard days. In everyone's life, there's going to be stuff. And just being able to laugh is so important. Obviously, being in love is a big thing and not wanting to be with anyone else and trusting each other and respecting each other and communicating. You know, all of the things, like you said something about cliche, Whitney, and

I feel like cliches are there for a reason because there's truth to them, you know, and the cliche is, you know, find someone that you can't live without is, is, you know, a big part of my, my green flag because I didn't want to live without him. So I feel like your personalities also like your pack, since you're more like outgoing social, like he's a bit more calm personality. I feel like that's a really nice balance for you guys too. I feel is that you too, Whitney? Is that you and a needy?

Oh, absolutely. I mean, I'm definitely, I love, I get energy from going out and being social. And he definitely is fine with, you know, let's just stay in. And we do balance each other. We're a lot similar in some ways. But I think that is one that we are different. Yeah. I have recently been talking to people about that, like the opposites attract thing.

There's something to it that, you know, being able to like not be kind of against each other in energy. if you know what I mean, like fighting each other's energy, if you are like similar in personality is, is great because, yes, you're right. I can go out and I can be with my girlfriends and I can go have a good time, like Whitney when we were in Mexico or Ashley when we were at the Bachelorette reunion, like, you know, you go have your girl time and you fuel up with that kind of energy and then you come home and you're able to like just chill and enjoy. what you enjoy at home with the person who, like, is okay with enjoying just being on the couch and watching a movie.

So I always say, like, I live my life. Like, I am a very, like, let's see, very type A. Like, I, my blood pressure is always all over the place. And he's just like that steady balance. Like, nothing gets him to, you know, anxious or down about anything. He's just always kind of like level-headed. And I need that because I can't imagine if I was with someone that was as chaotic as my brain sometimes. Right. Right. All over the place. What are the one last question, Ashley,

what are the green flags that you're looking for, like as someone who has been divorced and not just about your particular divorce, but I feel like just at your age, since you're older with kids, what are the green flags that are important to you? Good question. For sure for me, like I'm not a serious person at all. Like, I can't be too serious for a long period of time. So I need someone like that. Like lighthearted, likes to have fun. Like something happens, like just kind of let it blow over. Because, you know, JP's a very serious person, very, very serious. So for me, being lighthearted and fun and prioritizing fun, obviously all the things that I was telling you about, like all the reservations I have about men, like in terms of their trustability and

being a good person. Like, I feel like on a day to day, you can tell if someone's a good person when they're put in situations where they have the choice of like making the right, like doing the right thing. So good person, having fun. I also think somebody that is willing to put you first. Yeah. Just like. Yeah, for sure.

Willing to put you first. Yeah. Prioritize you. I have a lot of other things I could talk about, but I think those are great. Those are good. Yeah. Those are great. I feel like they're important.

I feel like for anyone out there just prioritizing, making priorities because that's, That's kind of how I exist is whatever is my priority for that day. If something is on the calendar, like just, you know, an hour ago, I was like, okay, I have to do the podcast. And then I have to go do this and that and the other thing. So I need to prioritize those things. But if my kid is calling, which when I was looking at my phone early in this podcast, my daughter was calling.

So I was like, okay, well, the priority is at least I have to just let her know that I'm doing a podcast and I can't answer her phone. But yeah, yeah, it's all about priority. and I feel like that that I feel like a priority in Ryan's life. And I'm sure Whitney, you feel that that way with Ricky. So, uh, you guys are the best. You are the best. Ashley, it was so good to meet you.

Nice to meet you too. I'm glad that we, we got to kind of get to know each other this morning. I know. I feel like I've always said I want them to do a reunion of everyone, not just, not just leads, you know, like we've been lucky enough to experience a couple times with Bachelor. but I would love to get in the room. I mean, it would be, it would take hours and hours and hours. Like, I would be physically drained afterwards, but it would be so much fun.

And where would we even do that? Can you imagine? Like the space? I can't. Miami, baby. Miami. That's right. On the beach.

I love you both. Thank you so much. Bye. Everybody. Have a great day. Follow the Ben and Ashley I, almost famous podcast on IHart Radio, or subscribe. wherever you listen to podcasts. Hey guys, it's us

and the Jonas Brothers. I'm Joe. I'm Kevin. And I'm Nick. And guess what? We created our own podcast called Hey Jonas. We invented a podcast? Well, we didn't invent it. We just contributed to us. We're the first people to do podcasts. We get to ask other people questions because we're sick and tired of being asked questions.

Well, sick and tired is a strong way to put it, but, you know, tired and sick. Tired and sick. Listen to Hey Jonas on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. Just listen. We don't care where you hear it. Another podcast from some SNL late-night comedy guy, not quite. Unhumor me with Robert Smygel and friends.

Me and hilarious guests from Jim Gaffigan to Bob Odenkirk to David Letterman, help make you funnier. This week, my guest, SNL's Mikey Day and head writer, Streeter Seidel, help an a cappella band with their between songs banter. There's that worst singer in the group? The worst? Yeah. Me.

Is there anything to the idea that because you're from Harvard, You only got in because your parents made a huge donation. The group. The yard birds, right? That's the name. The Harvard Yardt. But they're open. Do you have a name suggestion?

We're open. Since you guys are middle-aged. One erection. Listen to humor me with Robert Smigel and Friends on the I-Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. Human me. I need some jokes to make. me seem funny.

Hey, I'm Dr. Maya Shunker, a cognitive scientist and hosts of the podcast, a slight change of plans, a show about who we are and who we become when life makes other plans. I wish that I hadn't resisted for so long the need to change. We have to be willing to live with a kind of uncertainty that none of us likes. You can have opinions. You can have like a strong stance. And then there's your body. having its own program.

Listen to a slight change of plans on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Here's something that should not be as complicated as it is, getting a racist statue removed. And here's something that should be a whole lot easier than it is,

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Listen to Rebel Spirit Season 2 on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. This is an IHeart podcast. Guaranteed human.