The Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast - Wedding in Paradise with Chris Randone & Krystal Nielsen

Episode Date: August 29, 2019

Ben hangs out with Chris and Krystal to relive their Paradise wedding down in Mexico. They share secrets about what went on behind the scenes at their wedding, including a HUGE problem that went down right before Krystal walked down the aisle. We break down all the drama at their reception and Chris & Krystal offer some words of advice for Blake. Plus, we recap last nights episode of Bachelor in Paradise. Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is an I-Heart podcast. Hi, my name is Enya Eumanzor. And I'm Drew Phillips. And we run a podcast called Emergency Intercom. If you're a crime junkie and you love crimes, we're not the podcast for you. But if you have unmedicated ADHD... Oh my God, perfect. And want to hear people with mental illness, psychobabble.

Yes, yes. Then Emergency Intercom is the podcast for you. Open your... free iHeart radio app search emergency intercom and listen now why are tsa rules so confusing i'm manny i'm noah i'm noah this is devon and we're best friends and journalists with a new podcast called no such thing where we get to the bottom of questions like that why are you screaming i can't expect what to do now if the rule was the same go off on me i deserve it you know lock him up Listen to No Such Thing on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

No Such Thing. Betrayal Weekly is back for season two with brand new stories. The detective comes driving up fast and just like screeches right in the parking lot. I swear I'm not crazy, but I think he poisoned me. I feel trapped. My breathing changes. I realize, wow, like he is not a mentor. He's pretty much a monster.

But these aren't just stories of destruction. They're stories of survival. I'm going to tell my story and I'm going to hold my head up. Listen to Betrayal Weekly on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Dr. Joy Hardin Bradford, host of the Therapy for Black Girls podcast. I know how overwhelming it can feel if flying makes you anxious. In session 418 of the Therapy for Black Girls podcast, Dr. Angela Neil Barnett and I discuss flight anxiety.

What is not a norm is to allow it to prevent you from doing the things that you want to do, the things that you were meant to do. Listen to therapy for black girls on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. The Super Secret Festi Club Podcast Season 4 is here. And we're locked in. That means more juicy chisement. Terrible love advice. Evil spells to cast on your ex.

No, we're not doing that this season. Oh, well, this season, we're leveling up. Each episode will feature a special Bestie, and you're not going to want to miss it. My name is Curley. And I'm Maya. Get in here! Listen to the Super Secret Bestie Club on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. This is the Ben and Ashley I, Almost Famous Podcasts with IHeart Radio.

Yo, yo, yo. Do that sound cool? Is that pretty cool? Yo, yo, yo. No. Oh, okay. Hey, it's Ben here. Ashley is making her way from the East Coast back to the West Coast.

She'll be joining us very soon, and we'll be getting right back into it together as co-host. We still love each other. We're still together. This podcast is bigger and better than ever. She just had to take a little lover's break. But as you heard from her here recently, as she recorded in New York City, she's coming back soon. With that, we're going to be bringing Chris and Crystal, who just got married on last night's episode of Bachelor in Paradise. into studio today.

They're going to be co-hosting a lot of this show with me. But before we bring them in, I want to break down a few things that are happening. Last night's episode was, I would say one of the most entertaining episodes we've seen this season. Entertaining in sometimes a not-so-fun way, though. I want to hear from Chris and Crystal about this,

but I have some very, I would say, concrete and confident thoughts on their wedding. I didn't love being at that wedding and having people argue around me the whole time. That wasn't fun for me to hear. It's actually so bad that Jess and I actually got back to our room after it was all and said and done. And Jessica and I said, wow, what a beautiful wedding.

But what a weird experience at times. I mean, there was a moment. I'm telling you this. Jessica and I were sitting, literally sitting. in the reception and there is eight different groups of people arguing there was multiple people having tears there is makeout sessions going on this is a wedding this is a celebration and finally jessica and i just said this is too much we've got to go um yeah i want to hear from chris and crystal beautiful wedding super pumped for them i'm glad they're coming in the studio but i'm sure there's some

things that they'll feel did not go the way they wanted or maybe not maybe they'll prove me wrong but before they get in i want to break down a few things that are happening there's some main points from night episode outside of their wedding that we need to talk about. J.P.J. is on one. The guy is fired up because he now loves Tasia. And I think for me, and I want to hear from you, please email us at Ben and Ashley at iHeartMedia.com or use Twitter and hashtag almost famous podcast. I can't quite understand where his love suddenly blossomed for Tasia. I think I would be feeling this way and feeling for him if up to this point i had ever seen a sign that he was super into tachia i know he had said and mentioned it but then he goes on these two dates

because tasha kind of told him to but these two dates it wasn't like he was holding back it wasn't like he was thinking about tasha on both of these dates i felt like he was entering into new relationships with new great people i know i know the ferguson twins well they were on uh our season of the bachelor and Haley Ferguson is a tremendous, tremendous catch. I think as her sister has now found somebody that she loves, Haley has starting to venture out as well. I see JPJ go on this date with her. And the only thing I can think about is this relationship could work.

It could literally work. They're very similar people. They both are very fun to be around. They both are intelligent, even though sometimes when you watch him, you go, hmm, are they a character of themselves? But when you talk to them, they both have really, really good thoughts. They process things well. But all of a sudden, we see this whole new JPJ come into play. This J.B.J is mad at Derek because Derek is now into Tasia. And maybe I'm wrong here. Maybe I'm alone. Please tell me if I am. But I'm celebrating Derek.

Like, it's a good thing. He handled the Demi situation well. He didn't give up on the pursuit of love. He said, I'm going to stay in this thing. And then all of a sudden, before his eyes is this beautiful lamentation. Derek says, I'm going to go after her because she's interested in me as well. I don't think he did anything wrong. And I want to know what JPJ thought he was doing wrong. We have Tori in studio with me right now before we bring Chris and Crystal in. I got to get Tori's opinion.

What did JPJ actually feel like Derek was doing wrong? And did Derek do anything wrong? It sounds like the classic. he's not here for the right reasons scenario and he saw Derek talk about his podcast too much where he thought oh he just wants us to get more content I mean trust me I'm all for it they gave me content well I also feel like what Derek was saying was no I was doing that as it's really cool the opportunities we have available to us after the show like after going on we do have a podcast we can have opportunities with and I do want you to come on and chat about

Bachelor in Paradise. So I feel like it was kind of just work talk. But then JPJ took advantage of that and manipulated it kind of to make it seem like see Derek's here for the wrong reasons. It's interesting. There's a comment that was made by JPJ says Derek is on this show and using his bachelor profile to hook up with girls. And that's one of, so there's a few things that JPJ has said Derek is doing

One, he's using the Paradise Show to enhance his podcast content. The next is that he is using his Bachelor fame to hook up with girls. And then also he is deceiving everybody in the process. Right. I think as a viewer, it's hard. I haven't seen that yet. And I don't know if many people had. Like, even the people that were on the beach with Derek were confused by what JPJ was upset about.

We saw at the wedding. I understood at the wedding. I saw him getting mad at Derek at the wedding And everybody's like, I don't know what's going on I think this is maybe Let's say in the most Beautiful sins JPJ really does love Tasha

And he's losing his mind Because Tasha's slipping through the cracks Do you believe in love at first sight? Yeah, sure Because I swear this is what happened to him I don't know I don't think he loved Tasha as much until Derek started liking Tasha.

No, because he pursued her beforehand. A little bit. And then Tasia said, hey, seek out other options. And then he went on a date with Haley and Tajwan. It's all of a sudden become one of the most dramatic storylines that we're seeing in Paradise. I am interested to see how it plays out. I want JPJ to pull it back together. I like the JPJ.

That doesn't have to be goofy all the time. He doesn't have to make anybody laugh all the time. He doesn't need to gag after everything he puts down his throat because that seems to be something he's doing. but the J.B.J that just lifts people up. The joyful JPJ that is confident in himself, loving, caring, fun, exciting, and very secure in who he is. I don't like the JPJ I'm seeing. I want JPG to come back to normal because I think if he does, my prediction is if JPJ can wrap this up and get his head back, right, him and Tation could actually make things work. Do you know what I didn't like?

What's that? How he kept interrupting Derek and wouldn't let him speak. It happens. It was weird. It was monologue. It was weird. Derek was very calm and collected. And like I said, I've never seen a freak out like that.

Even on the show, like it was a uniquely dramatic freak out that had no sensibility to it. We can oftentimes on this show, I'm going to go back to some of the most villainous people we've ever had in this show. I'm not going to mention their names because some of them don't deserve to have their names mentioned on this podcast. But sometimes they're arguing things and you're like, oh, that kind of makes sense. Yeah, it's wrong. and it's aggressive and you're not saying the right things but like it kind of makes sense this one didn't make sense to me it was a lot of talking uh very little conversation and it completely lacked any sensibility derrick couldn't give it a word out i don't know what

happened to jpj i want it i want jpj to sit down on this podcast at some point and tell us what happened because it was a breakdown of all breakdowns that's one we'll go back on i think and watch years to come hey uh chris and crystal are getting warm up. They're getting a vocal cords ready. We're going to break down their wedding with them, all the good, bad, ugly, and excitement that came from it. But before we do, let's take a break to talk about one of our favorite sponsors. Hi, my name is Enya Yumanzoor. And I'm Drew Phillips. And we run a podcast called Emergency Intercom. If you're a crime junkie and you love crimes, we're not the podcast for you. But if you have

unmedicated ADHD. Oh my God, perfect. And want to hear people with mental illness, psychobabble. Yes, yes. Then Emergency Intercom is the podcast for you. Open your free IHeartRadio app. Search Emergency Intercom and listen now. Hi, I'm Janica Lopez and in the new season of the Overcover podcast, I'm taking you on an exciting

journey of self-reflection. Am I ready to enter this new part of my life? Like, am I ready to be in a relationship? Am I ready to have kids and to really just devote? myself and my time. I wanted to be successful on my own, not just because of who my mom is. Like, I felt like I needed to be better or work twice as hard as she did. Join me for conversations about healing and growth. Life is freaking hard. And growth doesn't happen in comfort. It happens in motion, even when

you're hurting. All from one of my favorite spaces, the kitchen. Honestly, these are going to come out so freaking amazing. Be a part of my new chapter and listen to the new season of the Overcomfit podcast as part of the MyCultura podcast network on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. The Super Secret Bestie Club podcast season four is here. And we're locked in. That means more juicy chisement. Terrible love advice.

Evil spells to cast on your ex. No, no, no, no. We're not doing that this season. Oh. Well, this season, we're leveling up. Each episode will feature a special Bestie, and you're not going to. don't want to miss it. Get in here!

Today we have a very special guest with us. Our new super secret best see is The Deva of the People. The Deva of the People. I'm just like text your ex. My theory is that if you need to figure out that the stove is hot, go and touch it. Go and figure it out for yourself. Okay. That's us.

That's us. My name is Curley. And I'm Maya. In each episode, we'll talk about love, friendship, heart breaks, men, and of course, Our favorite secrets. Listen to the Super Secret Bestie Club as a part of the Michael Tura podcast network available on the IHeartRadio app,

Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast. I'm Dr. Joy Hardin Bradford. And in session 421 of therapy for black girls, I sit down with Dr. Afea and Billy Shaka to explore how our hair connects to our identity, mental health, and the ways we heal. Because I think hair is a complex language system, right? In terms of it can tell how old you are,

you are, your marital status, where you're from, you're a spiritual belief. But I think with social media, there's like a hyper fixation and observation of our hair, right? That this is sometimes the first thing someone sees when we make a post or a reel is how our hair is styled. You talk about the important role hairstylists play in our community, the pressure to always look put together, and how breaking up with perfection can actually free us. Plus, if you're someone who gets anxious about flying, don't miss session. 418 with Dr. Angela Neil Barnett, where we dive into managing flight anxiety. Listen to Therapy for Black Girls on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your

podcast. Get fired up, y'all. Season two of Good Game with Sarah Spain is underway. We just welcomed one of my favorite people and an incomparable soccer icon, Megan Rapino, to the show, and we had a blast. We talked about her recent 40th birthday celebrations, co-hosting a podcast with her fiancé Sue Bird. watching former teammates retire and more.

Never a dull moment with Pino. Take a listen. What do you miss the most about being a pro athlete? The final. The final. And the locker room. I really, really, like, you just, you can't replicate, you can't get back. Showing up to locker room every morning just to shit talk.

We've got more incredible guests like the legendary Candace Parker and college superstar A.Z. Fudd. I mean, seriously, y'all. The guest list is absolutely stacked. for season two. And, you know, we're always going to keep you up to speed on all the news and happenings around the women's sports world as well. So make sure you listen to Good Game with Sarah Spain

on the Iheart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Presented by Capital One, founding partner of IHeart Women's Sports. Bachelor in Paradise this year has not missed its drama. We talked to Wells last week, and we both were feeling like the drama is out, kind of weighing the love right now. I do think we're taking a turn, but we're getting pretty far in the season. There's a few couples that we're celebrating right now.

I know that we feel pretty confident in Hannah and Dylan finally. Blake is still out there pursuing love, the best of his abilities. I think we've seen successful couples kind of blossom late in the show. But at this point, I feel like, tell me if I'm wrong, we're getting a little late in the game to really be cheering for any of these couples like we want to.

I mean, I'm thinking back to the Astrid's and Kevin's. I'm thinking back to the Joe and Kindles. I'm thinking back to the Tanner and Jades. I think the closest thing we have to that right now is honestly Hannah and Dylan. And their journey has not been perfect. I don't know if we necessarily expect it to be. But even after this episode, and we'll get into it later, the Clay and Nicole's are even breaking up, it feels like. I mean, we see Kalin heartbroken during the wedding because of Deaners. But we also see Connor step in as maybe

the hero. These are all things we want to tease to talk about later in the podcast. But quite honestly, I believe this. It's been a great season. It's been fun to watch. It's been at times hard to watch. But there are very few couples that I am fully behind other than Hannah and Dylan. And that's sad to me because I think a lot of them are on their edge. I don't think they're going to make it. Really? Mark my words. I don't think I think Hannah and Dylan make it. And I think a lot of the other ones that we're watching right now, I think it gets, it's, it's not looking good. Christian and Demi.

I think, oh, yeah, Christian and Demi will make it. I kind of, like, feel like that's like, like, I don't know if this makes sense. I feel like they're like above Paradise now. Like, it's almost like, you of course they're going to make it. Yeah. Like, it just feels like it's such a good and healthy and positive thing. I don't know why I watch this now. Like, they're a Paradise couple, but they feel like so much more than a Paradise

couple. Right. Like, they're out of the drama. That's true. Like, there's not a lot outside of their own relationship that could blow up in their face. Side note. Did you see how Jess had a little cameo? I did.

In the cocktail hour? Yeah, it's funny. I watched it before Jessica did. And I said, Jessica, you had a really good moment during this show. You're talking to Clay. And I was back to an interview and she was introducing herself to some of the people that were at the wedding. And I remember I came out and she's like, Ben, I felt so awkward. I don't know any of these people.

when I was just like spinning in circles, and like everybody was trying to mingle with each other and meet each other. And then we get to see it on national television where Jessica is talking to Clay. There's like an argument or somebody or some girl's trying to flirt with Clay and she comes up and Jessica just like stands there,

smiles and like spins in circles like, I don't know what to go. But this is a crazy part of this. And I think I mentioned it a few weeks ago on the podcast. I was at this wedding as well. And in this Bachelor Word, I've been in it for a long time, right? I mean, I don't know a lot of these new people.

So I was excited to meet them. Right. But I would say I'm a veteran. Like there's not many things on this show that is going to throw me off. Right. But there's two scenarios. One, I'm sitting at the wedding and I look behind me and there's Connor. I said, Connor, Ben, nice to finally meet you.

And he's like, oh, man, he's like, I want to talk to you right now. But I'm going to go talk to that girl. And just like, yes. Second one. Mike they go Mike I'm talking to him and he goes

dude I want to talk to you right now but I go to go talk to this girl two different occasions I got completely ignored dumped walked past because I was at that point I realized I was in the middle of a television show

I was just hanging out like I was at a wedding my final point before we take one last break before we bring Chris and Crystal in I know they're warmed up there listen to this this is crazy

we met Connors really tall good looking dude right hannah b season hannah b season we see him come into the episode at the end this time and i'm like connor you've been on the show like are you down on the beach i didn't know who's there and who wasn't he goes no man i've been in my hotel room for the last 10 days it's like hotel room for last 10 days why because i don't know he literally came down to paradise and he was just chilling until the beach opened up for have one more man walk in based on how people were going home coming and going there wasn't room for another man so he had to literally sit in his hotel room is that how it works you just sit in the hotel room i guess i've never been on paradise wow is that

wild that is like being in jail poor poor guy all right hey um let's take one more break and then we're going to bring on chris and crystal live to talk about their beautiful wedding that was a celebration of all sorts of love of a commitment to each other but also had its own drama let's take a break Hi, my name is Enya Umanzor. And I'm Drew Phillips. And we run a podcast called Emergency Intercom. If you're a crime junkie and you love crimes, we're not the podcast for you. But if you have unmedicated ADHD...

Oh my God, perfect. And want to hear people with mental illness, psychobabble. Yes, yes. Then Emergency Intercom is the podcast for you. Open your free Iheart radio app. Search Emergency Intercom and listen now. The Super Secret Bestie Club podcast season four is here. And we're locked in.

That means more juicy cheesement. Terrible love advice. Evil spells to cast on your ex. No, no, no, no. We're not doing that this season. Oh. Well, this season, we're leveling up. Each episode will feature a special bestie and you're not going to want to miss it.

Get in here. Today we have a very special guest with us. Our new Super Secret Bestie is the divo. the people. The people. I'm just like text your ex. My theory is that if you need to figure out that the stove is hot, go and touch it. Go and figure it out for yourself. Okay. That's us. My name is Curley. And I'm Maya. In each episode, we'll talk about love, friendship, heart breaks, men, and of course, our favorite secrets. Listen to the Super Secret Bestie Club as a part of the Michael Tura podcast network available on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast.

Hi, I'm Jenna Lopez, and in the new season of the Overcomfit podcast, I'm taking you on an exciting journey of self-reflection. Am I ready to enter this new part of my life? Like, am I ready to be in a relationship? Am I ready to have kids and to really just devote myself and my time? I wanted to be successful on my own, not just because of who my mom is. Like, I felt like I needed to be better or work twice as hard as she did. Join me for conversations about healing and growth.

Life is freaking hard. And growth doesn't happen in comfort. It happens in motion, even when you're hurting. All from one of my favorite spaces, The Kitchen. Honestly, these are going to come out so freaking amazing. Be a part of my new chapter and listen to the new season of the Overcumper podcast as part of the MyCultura podcast network on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast. I'm Dr. Joy Harden Bradford, and in session 421 of therapy for black girls, I sit down with Dr. Athea and Billy Shaka to explore how our hair connects to our identity, mental health, and the ways we heal.

Because I think hair is a complex language system, right, in terms of it can tell how old you are, your marital status, where you're from, you're a spiritual belief. But I think with social media, there's like a hyperfixation and observation of our hair, right? that this is sometimes the first thing someone sees when we make a post or a reel is how our hair is styled. We talk about the important role hairstylists play in our community, the pressure to always look put together, and how breaking up with perfection can actually free us. Plus, if you're someone who gets anxious about flying, don't miss session 418 with Dr. Angela Neil Barnett, where we dive into managing flight anxiety.

Listen to therapy for black girls on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. Get fired up, y'all. Season two of Good Game with Sarah Spain is underway. We just welcomed one of my favorite people and an incomparable soccer icon, Megan Rapino, to the show, and we had a blast. We talked about her recent 40th birthday celebrations, co-hosting a podcast with her fiancé Sue Bird, watching former teammates retire and more.

Never a dull moment with Pino. Take a listen. What do you miss the most about being a pro athlete? The final. The final. and the locker room. I really, really, like, you just can't replicate, you can't get back.

Showing up to locker room every morning just to shit talk. We've got more incredible guests like the legendary Candice Parker and college superstar AZ Fudd. I mean, seriously, y'all. The guest list is absolutely stacked for season two. And, you know, we're always going to keep you up to speed

on all the news and happenings around the women's sports world as well. So make sure you listen to Good Game with Sarah Spain on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcasts. Presented by Capital One, founding partner of IHeart Women's Sports. All right, we're coming back up. Chris and Crystal are in the studio.

Hello, Chris and Crystal. What's going on, man? How you doing? Man, you guys are glowing. Trying, man. You know how it is. Looking good. Looking really good.

All right. So we've been talking leading up to getting you both in the studio. about kind of everything leading up to your wedding. And so we broke all that down. Now I want to talk about your wedding. First off, let's start at the beginning. Why did you want to do your wedding on television? So this was actually a long process for Crystal and I,

months of talking, months of negotiations, and, you know, weighing the pros and the cons. We knew that doing a televised wedding would have some risks because we knew that, you know, not everything could be perfect when it comes to reality TV. However, though, we thought of all the positives and some of those being getting married at a place where we first met for the first time ever, had our first conversation, first I love you, first date. And it was very symbolic for us because we would be able to bring a new element into that, and that was our friends and family, to watch this chapter of love

that has evolved over the last year really come to fruition in front of their eyes at the place where we met. And I think it was also a thank you to the franchise because without all of this, we would have never found each other. And so I think that really all played into the decision making that allowed us to move forward and go ahead with the decision of having a televised wedding. Yeah, I think that was really well put. I will say that as we were going through this wedding planning process, a lot of fear from our past seasons really started to come back to the surface. And for us, I was just exposing just some areas. We were still hurt. And ultimately, like, as we got closer to the wedding and kind of making that decision, we ultimately had to decide

that these wounds were areas that we were going to not let us, let us, you know, be defined by them and, and instead choose to step forward into the future and become better. But it was areas where we said that this actually requires real work. What was those things? Like what things are you speaking about? You know, I'm talking about like when I was on The Bachelor and feeling I just felt so afraid to be myself. And I think I was so, as I went through that process, I was so scared of showing people who I really was that I wouldn't be accepted. I wouldn't be loved.

And a lot of that trails way back to my childhood of, you know, being on welfare. government assistance and my dad not being in the picture and not letting kids at school know that because they would tease me and make fun of me. And so kind of carrying this image and I realized that I'd been doing that my whole life. And when I went on The Bachelor and watched it back and went through all that scrutiny and getting this fill and edit, I mean, really, that's who I was. And so just becoming confident in who I am, the woman I am today and owning my truth and unapologetically, but lovingly being me was a journey to get through. I want to sit here for a second, Crystal, with you because I think this is an interesting

point that oftentimes we can't answer on this podcast. I want to start one and remind everybody that when Crystal was on the bachelor, your journey was not easy. It was not one that I would say you probably walked out of it feeling the most love, but you came on paradise and it was a completely, it was a complete redemption story, right? So, here's my question for you as somebody and you're not anymore you're not viewed this way you're loved you're celebrated obviously you just had a wedding on national television i can't wait to continue to talk about it but you were the villain after your season you went down to paradise known as the villain for anybody that comes on this show and maybe doesn't know themselves fully and isn't

doesn't have the greatest time on the show they don't represent themselves well or they watch you back and they go, wow, I didn't realize I was such a jerk or such a egomaniac or whatever. What would be your advice for them to have their redemption story? How do you then kind of turn the table? And then also my follow up to this and I want you to kind of like is what does it feel like to be completely loved now when at one time you felt isolated from this world? Yeah, I'd say right now there's still every now and then that little voice that just kind of doubts like am I enough like do people like am I am I good enough to get this love and and do I feel

worthy enough to receive this and I do and it becomes this like daily practice of reminding myself that it's not about other people validating me to be happy to feel worthy it's about loving myself and just owning that and embracing that and knowing that all those hard times that I went through weren't anything to be ashamed of because they actually gave me my strength and they defined who I am today and I think just honestly my relationship with Chris is what really gave me that confidence because there was a moment on the beach when we were in the pool like day two and he's like you're a business woman and I never even though I had a business I had never viewed myself as this entrepreneur as this business woman and I was like wow like you see something in me that

I couldn't even see for myself and I think that's why our relationship has evolved and that's why we got married is because we bring out these sides in each other that But maybe at one point, we didn't feel worthy. We couldn't see it. But we're continuously devoted to growing and pushing each other to really demand more of ourselves. And, you know, we're just being surrendering to love, really. As great as that sounds. I think one thing that we don't ever really focus on is how this show, for those of us who go on it, it's kind of like a blueprint.

And what I mean by that is, is you might have not the best of journeys going on this show. But that was you in the moment. A lot of people go on this show and they blame producers. They blame edits. But at the end of the day, it was your behavior. And whether that's ever happened to you before or it just finally came out, those were hitting qualities or characteristics that you saw that you didn't like about yourself. So instead of deflecting those situations, it's better to look at it in a way of

taking full ownership and embracing it. And what I mean by that is, is use that as fuel to understand that there are things that are deep and hidden that this show can bring out, but it's a good thing because that is a time where you can work on yourself and have self-development and work on a new blueprint for yourself to become a higher, better version of who you are. Yeah, that's awesome. And my advice, going back to your question, Ben, would be when I was on The Bachelor, there was the moment where I was blaming and I was pointing the finger and then ultimately I realized hey I'm a coach

like how I grow is through feedback is through constructive feedback so then I started going on Instagram and then I started reading all the comments and sifting through the messages and there was a lot of death threats there was a lot of really angry things but there was also like nuggets of love and attention and admiration that people had and I chose to read those without getting myself involved in that emotion and instead chose to see it as feedback and it was if someone kept continuously saying the same thing then that was obviously like something that I needed to look at within myself and grow so know that particularly we're speaking about Blake you know hard times don't have to define you you can grow and become better as we did and I really hope that and

that's another reason why I think we decided to get married was because we went through this journey of into the dark but came out because we were together because we leaned into this franchise and because we just we just surrendered the expectations and just stepped into who we were and I wanted that to be an inspiration story of that would inspire others that you know you can become anybody you want you deserve anything that you know you deserve happiness and love but you got to do some work to do it together what I would want to sit here for a second because Chris and Crystal, you've just said something that's never been said in the two years plus that we've been doing this podcast. I've never, and I want to tell

you, and everybody out there listening who has listened for a while will know that they're probably screaming like saying, oh my gosh, this is what Ben's been begging for. But we've never had a villain, air quotes, come on to this show and ever say, take ownership in your actions because if you do, you'll be a better person for it. Chris, you said it. You're brilliant and I'm learning from you. I'm just going to repeat what you said. You said, don't deflect what you're seeing. Instead, use it as growth. And when you do that, people respond. We connect through our vulnerability. We connect through our weaknesses. And I'm literally just repeating what you said. So this isn't my own thoughts here. But what I want to say is I want to remind listeners that what has happened here

And what the beauty of the show is it does bring out things that we don't always see. And when you use those as fuel to better yourself, amazing things can happen like these two. Guys, I'm telling you, we've never had that. Nobody's ever done that. And it is, it is such a breath of fresh air for me. I've been waiting for that. So with that, you guys are really smart people with great advice here. I want you to tag team this with Blake.

Blake does listen to the podcast. Blake's going to hear this. What is your advice to Blake right now? I think my biggest advice would be to really process this. Don't act out of emotion. Know that not everyone's perfect. And I think the biggest thing is that it's so hard to take ownership because we know the truth about ourselves. And we don't want the truth to come to life because we know that we'll be judged.

But this is a moment where coming to truth will set you free from the bondage that you're, that's holding you back. Because the longer you continue to hold on to that bondage and, you know, you can't break through. You'll just continue to have these issues to have these demons over you. And so for Blake, I mean, he's a great friend of mine. I love him. And I don't, my perception doesn't change of him. However, though, I do want to rally behind him because I know that this will be a great stepping

stone for Blake to become even a better man than any previous world. was through this journey on the franchise. So I would say to Blake, don't worry about what people are saying. Know that you've done what you've done. These actions were done from you, no matter if there was an excuse or reason, but just know that this is not what's going to define you. What's going to define you is how you respond and how you react in the action that you take moving forward.

Ooh. Yeah, that was fantastic. I didn't expect to get preached to today, but come on, Chris. Yeah, that was good. I'm going to go into, I think my advice as a life and fitness coach to Blake would be to shut off the phone and make sure you're taking time every day to better yourself. And, you know, I know people are saying a lot of things and a lot of opinions about him, but he can't listen to that. You know, he can't find his worthiness in what other people are saying. And what I have found to be

most transformative for myself and for my clients is setting aside time every morning and just waking up with purpose and a plan that is solely focused on on developing you. So I love waking up and drinking my lemon water, pulling out my pen and my journal and just writing out whatever is going on in my mind. And I think for Blake, it might be easy to blame things, but just writing these letters just to get out the emotions that could be consuming him in his head. And exactly like Chris said, just kind of reacting out of emotion and a lot of fear that I'm sure he has right now is going to really help him get that clarity on the steps that he needs to take to move forward because he's got the answers he knows what to do sometimes we just give other people

that power but it's until like we begin to look within and understand it's it's not about what's out there it's about what's within me yeah seek uh internally not externally because no one knows what's best for blake on the inside besides blake and so blake needs to shut everything down and listen to himself on the inside and that will allow him to begin this new path of moving forward. And when in doubt, Blake, just watch my season of The Bachelor and Chris's Season of the Bachelor and know that that doesn't have to define you. You can move on in a happy, healthy way with a beautiful wedding.

Hey, guys, I really want to talk about your wedding. I want to celebrate this wedding. I want to talk about how beautiful it was. I also want to talk about any of the behind the scenes things that maybe we didn't see that you were both feeling. But I want to break that down in total. So before we do that, let's take one more break. We'll get back talking about Chris and Crystal's beautiful wedding.

Hi, my name is Enya Emanzor. And I'm Drew Phillips. And we run a podcast called Emergency Intercom. If you're a crime junkie and you love crimes, we're not the podcast for you. But if you have unmedicated ADHD... Oh my God, perfect. And want to hear people with mental illness. Psychobabble.

Yes, yes. Then Emergency Intercom is the podcast for you. Open your free IHeartRadio app. Search Emergency Intercom and listen now. The Super Secret Bestie Club podcast season four is here. And we're locked in. That means more juicy chisement. Terrible love advice.

Evil spells to cast on your ex. No, no, no, no. We're not doing that this season. Oh. Well, this season we're leveling up. Each episode will feature a special Bestie and you're not going to want to miss it. Get in here. Today we have a very special guest with us.

Our new Super Secret Bestie is The Deva of the People. The Deva of the People. I'm just like text your ex. My theory is that if you need to figure out that the stove is hot, go and touch it. Go and figure it out for yourself. Okay. That's us.

That's us. My name is Curley. And I'm Maya. In each episode, we'll talk about love, friendship, heart breaks, men, and of course, our favorite secrets. Listen to the Super Secret Bestie Club as a part of the Marco Tura podcast network available on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts,

or wherever you get your podcast. Hi, I'm Jennifer Lopez, and in the new season of the Overcomfit podcast, I'm taking you on an exciting journey of self-reflection. Am I ready to enter this new part of my life? Like, am I ready to be in a relationship? Am I ready to have kids and to really just devote myself and my time? I wanted to be successful on my own,

not just because of who my mom is. Like, I felt like I needed to be better or work twice as hard as she did. Join me for conversations about healing and growth. Life is freaking hard. And growth doesn't happen in comfort. It happened in motion, even when you're hurting. All from one of my favorite spaces, The Kitchen. Honestly, these are going to come out so freaking amazing.

Be a part of my new chapter and listen to the new season of the Overcumper podcast as part of the MyCultura podcast network on the IHHHHHH Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. I'm Dr. Joy Harden Bradford, and in session 421 of therapy for black girls, I sit down with Dr. Athea and Billy Shaka to explore how our hair connects to our identity, mental health, and the ways we heal. Because I think hair is a complex language system, right, in terms of it can tell how old you are, your marital status, where you're from, you're a spiritual belief. But I think with social media, there's like a hyper fixation and observation of our hair, right?

That this is sometimes the first thing someone sees when we make a post or a reel. It's how our hair is styled. We talk about the important role hairstylists play in our community, the pressure to always look put together, and how breaking up with perfection can actually free us. Plus, if you're someone who gets anxious about flying, don't miss session 418 with Dr. Angela Neil Barnett, where we dive into managing flight anxiety.

Listen to therapy for black girls on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. Get fired up, y'all. Season two of Good Game with Sarah Spain is underway. We just welcomed one of my favorite people and an incomparable soccer icon, Megan Rapino to the show, and we had a blast. We talked about her recent 40th birthday celebrations,

co-hosting a podcast with her fiancé Sue Bird, watching former teammates retire and more. Never a dull moment with Pino. Take a listen. What do you miss the most about being a pro athlete? The final. The final. And the locker room.

I really, really, like, you just, you can't replicate. You can't get back. Showing up to locker room every morning just to shit talk. We've got more incredible guests like the legendary Candace Parker and college superstar AZ Fudd. I mean, seriously, y'all. The guest list is absolutely stacked for season two. And, you know, we're always going to keep you up to speed. on all the news and happenings around the women's sports world as well.

So make sure you listen to Good Game with Sarah Spain on the IHeart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Presented by Capital One, founding partner of IHeart Women's Sports. All right, we got Chris and Crystal in the studio whose wedding we just watched on Bachelor in Paradise. Chris and Crystal, I need you to lead me through this. I was not the ones planning your wedding. I had the opportunity to be there with my girlfriend, Jessica.

And it was a beautiful wedding from our perspective. But the things that you didn't see, I want to walk into this, because I did see this part. We all walk into this event venue. It's a beautiful place at the Vedanta in Porto, Mexico. And we don't really know what's going to go on, though, right? Jessica and I are going for your wedding. That is our purpose of being there. We don't know anything else at this point.

We flew down for Chris and Crystal's wedding. We go to a cocktail hour that we've been invited to. And at this cocktail, we're meeting Chris and Crystal's family, a couple of other people who were already there from Bachelor Nation that came down kind of with us that we had met at the pool earlier. And then the cast shows up. I mean, literally, they walked down this like venue space towards us, like a herd of animals and everybody's heads turned. And we all go, what is happening? We didn't realize. I know.

I saw your guys's reaction. I have no idea that you were so surprised. We had no clue. I had no idea. But all of a sudden the show literally came to us. And like not when this happens, right? How many cameramen we're following? That's what I'm going to say.

It's not just the cast that comes. It's the 15 cameramen that come up with him. And all their audio men. It's a huge group of people coming, charging towards the wedding. They come down, all looking fresh, all looking good, super happy to be there. You know, the one thing that didn't see on the show was everybody that got to the wedding. We're like, we're so glad to be out of the house. we're like feel like we're you know it feels like a different world that we've now entered into together we feel like we've like gone back into the real world for a bit they're super excited to be there to celebrate you all and to actually get a breath of fresh air

and air conditioning and air conditioning and very quickly and I don't know if how me you watch it last night on the show very quickly realize that the show really did come to us and this is a part that all of a sudden Jessica and I both started to feel weird about because there was arguing there was mingling of relationships and there was new people coming in during, you know, the cocktail hour. And Jessica very quickly looked at me and she goes, this is the show is like, this is like definitely about the show right now, right? And I said it did. And we, she started to get upset for you to,

but I will say it turned quickly once we walked into the ceremony because at that moment it really was about you two. It was a beautiful wedding that I want you to down kind of lead me through because we were nervous. The cocktail hour felt like it wasn't going to be this. But then all of a sudden, it all changed. It was a drastic shift. And your wedding was a wedding to be remembered. Was it everything you hoped it would be? Man, it's a tough question to answer because in a sense it is.

But in a sense, it isn't. I got to be honest because obviously we knew there could be some elements thrown into the mix of our wedding. And we knew that there were risks. Did we know the whole cast was going to come, not till about a day or two before the wedding. We thought we were going to be possibly giving out a date card to one couple to come down. So it was definitely a surprise factor, and we knew that there could be some situations taking place, knowing that that amount of people with that level of drama going on could interfere. But there were a lot of positives. I mean, Crystal looked absolutely beautiful. I almost fainted when she literally was walking down the aisle, because I felt such an array of emotions.

And, you know, it was a breakthrough for me to know that I was marrying my life partner, my best friend, and my family right there, my mom, front row, just crying and being so happy for me. And these are emotions and these are memories that will stick with me forever. And I'm extremely grateful and blessed, absolutely. And so for that, I am thankful. And I think 95% of this was actually everything that I envisioned. and we did get what we wanted out of this.

And I think for me personally, that 5% will dissipate soon enough, you know, because it's just short term. It's not long term. Everything that's sticking with me is all the beautiful memories, not the little bit of drama that occurred. Yeah, I would say that we knew going in that it was going to be incorporated into an episode, not be a standalone episode. So it wasn't going to be just about our wedding.

And we knew that there was going to be some cast that were. that would be coming in. And ultimately, we kind of looked at each other and we said, well, we're always down for an adventure. Let's type in. And what was important, the most important thing and the most special thing for us, especially for me, was that we got to bring our family

and our close friends onto the show and have them see what it's like to actually be a part of this franchise. Because there's a little, as you know, there's a little bit of a disconnect. I'm sure there was like that with Jessica, as we had talked about that she doesn't really know the world. so it's hard for her to comprehend and grasp like what goes on.

So we were really excited for that element of it. And I would say everything was perfect up until we were in the reception. And it was at that point it did feel very much produced. And there was an element where Chris and I were standing there and the room was totally empty. And all the cast was in there, a little corner for filming. And I all of a sudden looked around and like my microphone was off. and no cameras were on us and we're like staying there alone

and I was like this isn't even about us let's go like let's get out of here yeah I mean I mean at the end of the day we left we left your reception early

we did we did yeah and my friends while my groomsman actually ended up staying there until till production shut down but I think Crystal made a great point it's just in that moment

as happy as we were we did feel a little bit down knowing that the night wasn't over yet and we just felt like the night ended sooner than maybe it should have. Yeah. I want to back check because the reception is something that we just have to talk about. It was wild. I have so many thoughts on that. Your wedding though will be remembered. It was beautiful. It was a celebration. Yes, I think watching it on television, there was moments that felt a little weird like when Angela walks down the aisle and Clay is looking there like he's fearful and we'll see you know i remember we were sitting right across from him

and i had known the scenario and how it was going to present itself and i was watching his face as she walked down and i remember when i was in person i tapped jessica i was like that that is wild like i know they captured that and watching it back is going to be rough i haven't tagged in so many photos about like a screenshot of that it was so rough side eyes like oh my god it was rough It was used so good. Here we go. But your wedding was beautiful. Crystal, you looked absolutely gorgeous.

I'm sure you've been told that a thousand times. I think you should be told that a thousand times and a thousand times more. Chris said it. He almost fainted. You looked so good. You did. You looked absolutely beautiful. But I do have to ask, what in the world is this smudge pot cleansing?

And why were they doing it on your genitals? Well, so if you watched Paradise when Chris and I were on and where we met, I mean, part of who I am is I love crystals and I love Sage. And a lot of that comes down to energy. And I smudge daily as part of my morning routine that I recommend Blake to do. And what Sage does is it removes negative energy and it just cleans the room. And it allows you to just kind of wash away. way any any negativity of the past and allows you a clean slate and I felt that was really symbolic for christeny because we wanted to let go of who we were of the past of those hard times

never forgets but let go of that trauma any of that negativity that we had been prior to now moving forward as a married couple so we really wanted to come into this marriage just clean cleansed and new. Yeah, I think it was very symbolic for us because we're very into, in tune with one another. And when it comes to our energies, this is one of the biggest breakthroughs we've had in our relationship is that we can feed off and understand each other's energy and someone doesn't even have to say something. And being in tune like that allows you to communicate more effectively.

And it allows us to not bottle up emotions. And it also helps us identify things within ourselves that we're able to work on rather than not being able to identify and to continue going down a path of not becoming better day in and day out. So this smudge ceremony, it was our choice. And we just wanted to kind of just show everyone that you don't have to bring negative emotions from the past into the future. And knowing that we can kind of shed some of that dead skin that we had. from previous seasons. This was a big moment for us to go into a new chapter, clean, refreshed, and fully confident of us being a couple and taking on the world together.

And honestly, it was also, like what I was talking about earlier, Ben, it was just showing people who we really are and not needing to try to put on this front and try to be someone we're not. We wanted to let people into fun little quirky things like having crystals and burning sage And some people think it might be silly, but for us, that's a part of our life. It's a part of our life. Yeah. A really important one.

Yeah. And we got to see that. Now, why in your genitals? Is that like a thing? You know, I'm not really sure. Okay. Todd is a really good friend of mine. I mean, we've grown together closely over the last year.

And, you know, he knew that he had this role. He was very nervous. He tried to back out of it, but we wanted him to do it. Todd is also one of the producers on the show. show and he was actually both of our producers individually and then on Bachelor in Paradise so he was has been a pivotal part of our relationship so i mean the direction of how he was sageing the smoke and with the feather you know for him i think he just wasn't even thinking he was just trying to do it and get out of there so i would say this i actually earlier that day because he was so nervous i was

like todd come over let me like practice on how you how you like wiggle a feather burst of smoke. So we came over, I gave him a whole tutorial. He was like, good. I was like, you know, this is a really serious role. I don't want to be a joke. This is, you know, my name is Chris. This is like, this, you know, a ceremonial gesture.

Like, and this is an honor for you. So please take it seriously. And then he walks out in flip flops and it told me in Baham and a shirt. And he's like, oh, hell no. And then he's trying to be all, you know, Todd. He's just like, oh, ho-ho-ho. Like, trying to be all like giddy and dorky. And we love him so much.

But you see me like go to Chris I go no laughing. I didn't want to be a joke. I want it. It's a very serious thing and it was our wedding ceremony. It wasn't a it wasn't a joke. But it turned out that way. I just got to roll the punch sometimes. Oh yeah. It was great. It was really great. I was just yeah. I'm glad you cleared it up for me because I have I've never seen that before and I thought out of anybody to to be cleansing genitals Todd is the one to do it. Well is there anything that we saw we didn't see maybe in your wedding in the ceremony portion because we're going to get into the reception here in a second after we take a break but is there anything else in the wedding portion that you want to mention to anybody out there listening i mean i think one of the biggest

moments i mean ben you saw this was i wasn't wearing a mic right before crystal was about to walk down the aisle uh you know audio came up to me and they're like you know sound check and i'm like like, I don't even have a mic on. And they're like, wow, they're like, okay, we got to, hold on, abort, abort. And they're like freaking out. And, you know, it was just funny because then we have Crystal waiting and she had no idea what was going on. Ben, I was behind that curtain for seven minutes by myself.

And no one was telling me what was going on. People just like, would walk up and like smile and give me a thumbs up. And I'm like, what is going on? Yeah. Well, and I all of a sudden I hear everyone in the crowd like laughing, like louder, louder, louder, and I'm just like, I'm so confused. Like, the music stopped. And that moment, I kind of started to freak out.

And then ultimately, I just had to, like, close my eyes, like, draw within. And I did this, like, mini meditation, said, like, 12 prayers. And ultimately, I was able to, like, pull into myself and have this incredible experience where I was able to get so present, so focus, so elevated, um, energetically. So that when I walked out, I just felt like I was beaming this aura. loved love. And I felt just this ball of energy encompassing who I was in that moment. And that was a really special moment because I know leading up to the wedding when we were talking about it, everyone was asking me, like, who's going to walk me down? And I brought up like, I don't

really know. Like, I think I'm going to go by myself. And people were like, no, you shouldn't do that. Or why would you do that? And it was this element where I started to feel shame about it. but my dad isn't really a figure in my life neither is Chris's and that's actually what brought us together and so for me to make that take that step to um you know make that walk alone I realized that it was an honor because I am self-made and I was raised by a single mom but she was really not at all in my life and um it was a real honor for me to do that um and I was really proud of myself so it was a really special moment. I think that's a point

that maybe I didn't even realize was you did walk yourself down the aisle. And that's a power. That is a very special, powerful moment. And you walked yourself up to Chris and had an amazing, amazing celebration that Chris Harrison officiated.

You wrote your own vows for each other that were beautiful. They were funny. They were unique. They were personal. And now, Chris and Crystal, based on your story of brought you here one of the most beautiful things about you too is the story that you tell about the life that you've lived up to this point the story that's brought you here is now on to celebrate your husband and wife and we are so excited to be celebrating you now on this franchise thank you

um you are a success story and one that will be talked about for years to come let's take a break and i want to talk about the drama though that ensued at your reception that caused you both to leave a little early let's take a break You got it. Hi, my name is Enya Yumanzoor. And I'm Drew Phillips. And we run a podcast called Emergency Intercom. If you're a crime junkie and you love crimes, we're not the podcast for you.

But if you have unmedicated ADHD... Oh my God, perfect. And want to hear people with mental illness, psycho babble. Yes, yes. Then Emergency Intercom is the podcast for you. Open your free IHeartRadio app, search emergency intercom, and listen now. The Super Secret Bestie Club podcast Season 4 is here. And we're locked in.

That means more juicy cheesement. Terrible love advice. Evil spells to cast on your ex. No, no, no, no, we're not doing that this season. Oh. Well, this season, we're leveling up. Each episode will feature a special bestie, and you're not going to want to miss it. Get in here.

Today we have a very special guest with us, our new Super Bestie. secret bestie is the diva of the people. The diva of the people. I'm just like text your ex. My theory is that if you need to figure out that the stove is hot, go and touch it. Go and figure it out for yourself. Okay. That's us.

That's us. My name is Curley. And I'm Maya. In each episode, we'll talk about love, friendship, heart breaks, men, and of course, our favorite secrets. Listen to the Super Secret Bestie Club as a part of the Michael Tura podcast network available on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast. Hi, I'm Janica Lopez, and in the new season of the Overcover podcast, I'm taking you on an

exciting journey of self-reflection. Am I ready to enter this new part of my life? Like, am I ready to be in a relationship? Am I ready to have kids and to really just devote myself and my time? I wanted to be successful on my own, not just because of who my mom is. Like, I felt like I needed to be better or work twice as hard as she did. Join me for conversations about healing and growth. Life is freaking hard. And growth doesn't happen in comfort. It happens in motion, even when you're hurting.

All from one of my favorite spaces, The Kitchen. Honestly, these are going to come out so freaking amazing. Be a part of my new chapter and listen to the new season of the Overcomfort Podcast as part of the My Culture Podcast Network on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast. I'm Dr. Joy Harden Bradford, and in session 421 of therapy for black girls, I sit down with Dr. Athea and Billy Shaka to explore how our hair connects to our identity, mental health, and the ways we heal. Because I think hair is a complex language system, right, in terms of it can tell how old you are, your marital status, where you're from, you're a spiritual belief. But I think with social media, there's like a hyperfixation and observation of our hair, right? that this is sometimes the first thing someone sees

when we make a post or a reel it's how our hair is styled. We talk about the important role hairstylists play in our community, the pressure to always look put together, and how breaking up with perfection can actually free us. Plus, if you're someone who gets anxious

about flying, don't miss session 418 with Dr. Angela Neil Barnett, where we dive into managing flight anxiety. Listen to therapy for black girls on the iHeart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. Get fired up, y'all.

Season two of Good Game with Sarah Spain is underway. We just welcomed one of my favorite people and an incomparable soccer icon, Megan Rapino, to the show, and we had a blast. We talked about her recent 40th birthday celebrations, co-hosting a podcast with her fiance Sue Bird, watching former teammates retire and more. Never a dull moment with Pino. Take a listen. What do you miss the most about being a pro athlete?

The final. The final. and the locker room. I really, really, like, you just, you can't replicate, you can't get back. Showing up to locker room every morning just to shit talk. We've got more incredible guests like the legendary Candace Parker and college superstar AZ Fudd. I mean, seriously, y'all. The guest list is absolutely stacked for season two.

And, you know, we're always going to keep you up to speed on all the news and happenings around the women's sports world as well. So make sure you listen to Good Game with Sarah Spain on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcast. or wherever you get your podcasts. Presented by Capital One, founding partner of IHeart Women's Sports. For as beautiful as the wedding ceremony was, I would say the reception was, well, what would you rate the reception on a scale of 1 to 10? You know, I would say that the first half,

it was about 8, 8 and a half. And then I would say the second half was probably. Probably a one. I would say, I'm only given a point because we actually left at that point. So, but yeah, I mean, that, that's kind of how I would feel about it. I mean, here's what went down. A beautiful start. Great food.

A really fun dance. Some great talk, speeches. Everything seemed to be going like a normal reception does. It was great. Your family was there. And then all of a sudden, it did. There was a drastic shift where it felt like all of a sudden the reception was no longer the focus. You had Haley and Annalise and Ashley talking about Angela and how bright and glowy she was walking out.

She was. It made sense. Tation and Annalise are talking about Derek and J.P.J. Katie and J.P.J. are talking. People are, you know, kind of ragging on our buddy Blake a little bit more. All this stuff starts to get heated about midway through, I'd say an hour and a half into your reception. And at that point, I felt like there was no getting it back. We actually just kind of left.

I bet we were literally on elevators the two of you and Jessica and I like side by side. Yeah, we love yeah, right at the same time. Yeah. Because it did feel like something was missing. Was that? I mean, I don't know. Yeah, the bride and the groom.

Yeah, the bride and the groom was gone. I was missing. I think for me, and if anybody's out there, they're like, okay, you give up some of the stuff with the TV wedding. You understand that sometimes you're going to have a mic issue and it's going to have to pause and you're going to have to reset. and do this. Like, that's something you're giving up to have a wedding in Mexico with your family there so they can see all this go down. Like, that just happens, right? But there is, and then the reception, right? Receptions are usually wild. They're drama filled most of the time. In real life are on TV. There's hookups going on. There's tears. Like, it's people are drinking, dancing,

laughing, whatever. So I guess I'm leaving your reception going, it just felt like a little bit less than what I would experience in the real world. Like, I want to hear if you agree, like, you obviously left early, but it did feel like all of a sudden, you were gone, we were gone, and I'm, and we look back in the room that everybody was like supposed to be in, and it did. It felt like everybody was in a corner arguing, laughing, arguing, or crying. Yeah, I will say one thing that really stood out to me was that, and they didn't really show this too much, but they'd invited multiple, multiple.

cast that were not current cast or bridal party who were singles and trying to get a chance to go down to paradise. Yeah. And so a lot of them came not for the wedding per se, but to try to make a connection to pursue someone to come back to paradise. Or back on to paradise. Annalise and Bibiana, I know we're there that had been kicked off Paradise. We're back at the wedding looking to go back. Who were some of those people that from past season that were down there kind of looking to get on to Paradise? There was Brooks, Chase McNary, Danielle Lombard, that girl, Whitney, Whitney, I mean, Annalise. Annalise, Viviana. Yeah, I mean, there was quite a bit.

I'm trying to think of other ones, but I mean, those people were there too. And so you had, I mean, to be honest with you, it kind of felt like a rose ceremony, Ben. It really did. It seemed like there was panic. It seemed like there was a lot of sadness. People were scrambling because they thought that this was their chance to go down to the island. I remember people coming up and asking like, what should I do to try to get on the show? And I'm thinking like, man, this is my wedding.

Like, I can't be talking strategy right now. This is not where my focus is at. I felt deflated at that point. So it really did, you know, in a weird way, it felt like a roast ceremony. So people were actually asking you to advice on how to get onto the show at your wedding. Yeah. That's wild. That's like who I should meet, who I should hook up.

with and I'm like I don't I don't really know all the couples or the all the all the situations that are going on right now and you know it just it just for me I just I didn't anticipate that I guess it were you okay I mean obviously the wedding was important to you like the ceremony were you willing to give up the reception but I mean so here's here's where this is coming from I was in a car the next morning heading to the airport with a bunch of your family members and they we're so thrilled with how the whole thing went. So obviously the reception wasn't that important to your family. They really wanted to see a beautiful wedding.

So were you two going into it willing to give up the reception kind of for the sake of the show? Or was that something that you really wanted? Honestly, we thought, I mean, we spent, I made a whole freaking playlist on Spotify of songs we were going to play that not one was played because they couldn't play it because they were filming a show. Yeah. And so, I mean, we thought it was going to be an actual podcast. party and it and it wasn't that later half that was supposed to have been the DJ on the floor dancing and you know get down we didn't have that element of it so for me I think that's what we were most excited about and we were led to believe that that would be absolutely a part of the

ceremony or the reception and it wasn't but ultimately like we knew there was going to be some give we knew there was going to be some take and is it worth the ceremony to not have the reception absolutely yeah the ceremony was so beautiful so gorgeous everything we wanted and something you didn't see was the night before we had our rehearsal dinner which was just an incredible experience so ultimately i mean our friends and family and us had a full vacation that was i mean it was awesome it was five star so yeah we didn't get that that second half of the reception and it was it was worth it i would say i'm kind of thankful for the reception because it allowed my friends and family um to see the element uh that no one really

and that's the show actually in full force taking place. And I don't know if Jessica can attest to this, but it probably allows her to understand you more now when you do talk about the show and she can now kind of be someone that you can confide in when you do want to talk about the show because she probably can be more understanding now. Just as my family and friends now

have allowed me to kind of be more open about the show and have asked me questions because now they understand and now they're not judgmental or they're not confused, which has really kind of helped my relationships with my boys as well because they've always tried, but they couldn't really pinpoint or understand and the same thing with my family. So in a weird way,

I am kind of thankful for all those things that took place at the reception because they got to see it. Yeah, there's two things that Jessica said to me after the wedding. One, maybe three. There's a lot of things, actually, she said. Crystal is beautiful. What a great ceremony, those things. And then she was like, I'm less intimidated was one thing she said by this world now, which was such a beautiful thing to hear.

She's like, for so long, I've kind of put the show up on a pedestal since I've met you and I've been intimidated by any person that's been on the show. And I'm less intimidated now because I realize everybody's like normal or just a little less than normal people. And then second is that she can relate with me better, that she can understand more when I talk about things. she knows me better because of that reception and because of the wildness that took place. A few last questions. I know we've got to get you out of studio. I really want to talk about real quick the Clay scenario with Angela. Angela was in the wedding. She's a good friend of yours. At all, did you feel bad about kind of setting, I don't, I don't even say setting Clay up, because I don't think you set Clay up. You didn't even know he was really going to be there.

But at all, was there a point in this that you felt bad for Clay, or was this kind of something that should just happen. I mean, then we see Angela show up to the beach. So obviously this was a scenario that was going to happen somehow, some way. What were your thoughts, maybe is the best way to phrase this on the Clay, Angela, Nicole scenario during this time in paradise? I mean, so Clay's actually one of my really good friends. I'm the one who got Clay and Angela together. They're both my good friends. And to believe it or not, I was going to have Clay v. in my wedding. And that kind of changed last minute because I didn't want to have have that situation and kind of, you know, take away from Crystal on her day. But the whole

dynamic is this, is that, you know, the reason why Clay and Angela broke up is because Clay was in a really tough spot with OTAs coming up with the NFL and trying to get a tryout. And so what took place is they really had some deep conversations and they were planning for the future. But Clay takes care of his entire family. I mean, down to his grandma, down to his brothers financially. And this can be a burden on someone, especially when they have. have the weight of all of that. And I think those deep talks that they were having in the time that they broke up allowed him to open his eyes and realize that right now, I need to figure out myself first with what I can do moving forward for my career in order to have these

talks that I'm having with Angela actually come to fruition. So in a way, he didn't want to let Angela down, I think. And I understand from Angela's point of view, too, because it is weird and it is shocking. However, though, from that, I would say that, you know, Clay did the only thing that he can do in that point of time, and that was to let go, even though it hurt both of them. And I think after a couple months went by, the whole career thing was now taking a dramatic shift because I think at this point, you know, the NFL is done for him, which is tough. And I think for any man, especially who has put so much work in to have that kind of slip out of your hands, it's definitely a shock. And it definitely affects who you are as a man.

because then you have to figure out what's next. And I think Bachelor in Paradise was a way to get away from this and really be open to the fact that knowing that he knows that it's over now, maybe love can now be something that he can work on and focus on because he can now kind of have it come back into his life. And what I think is the whole Nicole situation is they get along great. I actually love them. I think they were beautiful.

And I think that everything that we saw with Clay and Annan, Angela is exactly what we would have expected from the reception or from the ceremony to the reception. And to be honest with you, I don't have any ill will towards anything that took place with them because I think that this was important for them to have that talk. I think that this was important for them to see each other face to face because at the end of the day, we're really going to now and see the true answer if this is a couple that is someone that should be together or if they should be a part. Yeah, it's going to be a storyline we want to follow in paradise for sure yeah absolutely and I know I definitely was nervous and I spoke with

Angela prior to the wedding and I was like I know Clay's going to be there we hear he's dating someone I really don't want this drama to take away from the wedding yeah and she'd really reassured me that she was in a good place and you know it would it would be good so we were so we knew that we knew that we knew that there was going to be an opportunity for them to actually come together and talk since they had broken up and I think that that Angela was really needing some closure on this relationship. So we wanted them to sit down and have a conversation. So we were really supportive of it.

And we love Angela very deeply and we love Clay and we both want them both to be happy and to take the opportunity for them to explore what they want. And I think that for Clay, what is going to be really interesting that we're going to see play out this season is, I mean, he broke up with Angela because he needs time to find out who he is. What's his identity post football, which consumed who he, was and now he no longer has that so who is he now and he needs to take that time to to find himself and to create this new life and is he ready for a relationship or does he still need to take

take some time that's a good theme for the rest of paradise is clay ready for a relationship or just he need to take some time uh chris and crystal thank you for sharing about your wedding on this podcast um what a wild season of bachelor in paradise we hope we can celebrate couples from this season like we were able to celebrate you too. You are, the words of wisdom that both of you shared are things that I'll take with me, that I'll point other people to, I bet on this podcast for years to come when they are villains and they feel like they've gotten a bad edit or whatever. I'll just say, you need to talk to Chris and Crystal because redemption does exist,

but it has to exist within yourself first. And I think those are words that I'm going to take from listening to both you. I'm so pumped that I got to celebrate. Thank you for inviting Jessica and I to the wedding. Thank you for allowing us to be down there. Oh, no problem. Thank you. Being at the Vedanta.

Is there anything in your lives right now that you'd like to share with our listeners before we go? Yeah, I want to say that the work that Chris and I did have been doing on ourselves has really evolved so much are who we are as people as well as our relationship and then just elevated us into such as beautiful transformation. And so I've decided to now incorporate life coaching into my fitness coaching. coaching to be working with women on empowering their mind, honoring their bodies, and transforming their lives. So that's going to be coming up really soon. And I cannot wait to start just being, just speaking to women in their heart because I think a lot of us just feel unworthy and unhappy and we're really desperately seeking happiness.

But ultimately, it's within ourself. And we all have the tools. Sometimes we just need to coach to point us in the right direction to bring that out within ourself. Well said. So coachcrystal.com coming soon. Good for you guys. Hey,

thank you for sharing your wedding with us on TV. Fans and listeners of this podcast have already started to write in and just say how awesome it is to see weddings on this show and celebrate the two of you. Chris, you are the best doggy daddy. I know in Crystal, um, is that what you called him?

A doggy daddy. Doggy daddy. Yeah. Oh, doggy daddy. My boys. I call him daddy Yeah We've talked about that in this podcast

I feel all weird about it Hey follow my league guys Thanks again for co-hosting with me today Ashley will be back soon Listeners out there The Almost Famous podcast Is Moving and Grooving Make sure you tune in next week

To another breakdown A Bachelor in Paradise With that I've been Ben And I've been Crystal And I've been Chris Peace Bye Follow the Ben and Ashley I

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