When You Fall In Love...And He's Not Divorced Yet with Dolores Catania and Paul Connell
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03:05Today is going to be so much fun because I'm going to connect with a couple that we have that have both gone through divorce and found love in each other in their chapter two.My guest today, you know, because you've seen their love while watching Jersey Housewives.So here we go.Please welcome my friends, Dolores Catania and Pauly Connell to the podcast.All right, my loves. Hello.Hi.Hi, you guys.Hi, dog.
03:35Dog's here.Hi, dog.Hi, baby.Books are part of part two also.Oh, right.Very true, right?This is dogs part two.What was dogs part one?
03:46A backyard, a junkyard, actually.Oh, better part two.It's a happy ending.And they're in love.They're in love.I'm a third wheel.Listen, I mean, you guys already know this, but this podcast is about,second time, third time.
04:01I'll have you asked my family,fourth time around.There's my parents.Oh, you know, we're going to talk a little bit about your,we're going to call it second time around.Listen, you guys met.How old were you guys when you met?Well.
04:1412?No, what was I?I was 50?And you were.Yeah, 50.So we're four years apart.Four years apart.Younger men.
04:25This is at first for me.I don't like it.But Paul's a man.Yeah. Honey, you can say a lot of things about Paul O'Connell. He is all man. You have no feminine. There's nothing feminine about Paul O'Connell.Paul's a man. Yeah. But he typically dates 28-year-olds. So let's go there. All right. So a little bit, you guys, about relationship history.I talked to something good, right? The second price had to be better. Oh, honey, this is good to our listeners. We want to know.We want to know it all.The good, the bad, the ugly.
05:02Okay.So just tell us a little bit, Polly, about,we're just going to touch on it about your relationship history pre-Dilores.And after, well, okay, so you and your wife separated, broke up.And did you have, what kind of,do you have a lot of relationships between the time that you guys split upand the time you met Dolores?Yeah, yeah, absolutely.
05:21I definitely, you know, met a bunch of different people, you know,sometimes somewhat serious, not so serious.because you're finding yourself, right?Yeah.It can't be serious until you find yourself.So by default, you know, you go through these patterns of being with people and thenthis relationship's not working out until you find the right person.Do you think there was something that a common thread in terms of like the women that you were dating
05:46that where it just didn't work out because, I don't know, they all dot, dot, dot.Yeah, I think the biggest common thread was I was immature.Really?Yeah.Definitely. So I matured when I met the right person.I love that.Well, it makes also somebody.Sometimes you morph into the person.
06:08You kind of adopt to who you're with.Like if you were with a girl who wanted to go out every night and drinking every night, you're going to stay in that.I love that.But I'm just thinking like also there is, there was something about Dolores from the get-go.When you first saw her, met her, tell us a little bit about that.Tell us about, I think you guys met in the Apple store.Yeah, she, yeah, that's, so I was a friend of ours, neutral friend that introduced me by text to Dolores.And she's like, my friend is, you know, recently single and is, you know, would you want to date with her?
06:47And I'm like, of course.I'm like, you know, didn't know what she looked like.And I honestly, people keep on saying, oh, he's followed her.I never knew Dolores from the show.People say that you follow it, right?No, because he's bitter because she's a housewife, blah, blah, blah, right?So, yeah, you follow me, by the least.Wait a second.
07:07So, Paul, had you ever watched the show?You know, my ex-wife used to watch this show.I think she liked Dolores.Yeah, everyone likes Dolores.Look, Dolores.I think she, you know, I used to look at her and go,what the f-you-watching?Watching.
07:21It was the time, Carol Amanzo,trees of Judeis was turning over tables.so when I was like in and out going to workyou know whatever it was kids running aroundand I couldn't understand that I was likeI don't understand what that is so yeah so it wasobviously then I got to see a photographwith Dolores and I'm you know of course I'm like yes
07:38I will absolutely go on a date with this personand then we yeah it's justit's a small silly story ball I went to Apple storebecause my phone was broken we were texting at this timebecause there was like a message about us all goingfor like a double date to meet everybodyand Dolores, like, I don't fucking do that shit.I'm not going on a double date.
07:58My girl.Here's my number.I don't do double date.Here's my number.Especially for no, first dates.No.No.Man up, baby.
08:08Man up.She goes, here's my number.This is my pass code.I don't know.She goes, here's my number if you want to, like, reach out.So we start talking.So I just put them to say to her, my fucking phone is broke.I have to go to the Apple store.
08:22Jen, I'm not bullshit.I'm sitting in the Apple store at a mask on.I wish the mask could just cover my whole fucking existence.In walks, this chick with fucking hair hits everywhere.It was like everybody in the store turns around looking at her.And I can hear the bracelet jingling.I'm like, please don't fucking tell me that's Dolores.Get the hell out of here.
08:46She walks literally.She walks right up to me and she goes, hey, such a car outside.Get the hell.Hold on. Hold on. Hold on.back this up hold onyou saw her coming and you thought let thatnot be Doloresoh my pants oh because she was
09:02oh because you were sitting there feel oh because shewas so gorgeous you're saying you like we're flusteredshe was a billboard for lulu lemonsthere were like I was likewith the bodyright block box the body the legsright like there was aI mean there was just so much going on at one moment
09:18that I'm like sweat wasdripping down to somethingthe guy was likeCan I help you, sir?And I'm like, yeah, where's the exit?I need to stop.Oh, so this is for a different podcast, but I'm just going to say,and Dolores, you've heard me say this before.
09:33That's the best way for, in my opinion, for couples to start out.I like when the man just loses his shit.I feel that 100%.So, yeah, I do too.It disarmed me completely.And, you know, I think kind of as well for her,because she was like, you know, well, obviously she premeditatedbecause she knew I was there.
09:52But I didn't.But when you came in, it was, from that point forward, it was just...Everybody feels that way.Dolores has walks in a room and, I don't know, the air gets, everybody can stand still.Oh, this house, the air gets...Yeah.I don't know, sucked out of the room.Is that the expression?
10:09Wait, do a little bit, tell me a little bit about why you think the other relationshipsdidn't work out and here you are with Polly.Because, again, not the right person.Just not.not a lot of you know at the end of the day you both have to want the same thingand that's what keeps it going not every it's not always easy but if you're with theperson that has the same intentions as you there's something to work through an argument there'ssomething to work through a fight there's you know it's worth staying around what are the
10:45what do you guys think your common intentions are a little bit well we both were dating with apurpose? What's your comment for our relationship? Yeah. I mean, long-duty. Permanent. Yeah,longevity, right? Yeah, it's like it's, you know, I know there's a lot of criticism aboutput a ring on it and all this kind of stuff of marriage and we're getting a little bit far ahead now,but, you know, that's our goal is that, regardless to the piece of paper and regardlessto the piece of jewelry. Our goal is to that. Obviously, them things are all coming. Yeah.In due time, you know? Yeah. You got a lot of crap aboutbeing married when you guys
11:22were our first together. I knowyou're divorced now.And it's funny, I had my own opinions on itlike, we're not babies anymore.And for me, watchingDolores, like, who gives a shit?Like, I knew you were going to get divorced.How people, Jen, are buying
11:38and married men that are saying I'm still married?Like, give me a break.Amen. Amen. Amen, brother.Okay, so please, girls, settle down.Yeah, yeah. No, I felt like that too.I mean, Dole, did you have any trepidation just being with a man who was still married?I ask these questions, you guys, I know that a lot of, there are a lot of viewers who are goingto listen to the podcast, but a lot who haven't watched.
12:02Anybody should.Yeah, I did, but he had told me that his divorce was going to be sooner than it was.But as time went on, you know, time goes very fast.I wasn't, I wasn't keeping tabs.I was never going to force his hand on it.Eventually, yeah.Smart.I eventually, I would have made a stand on it.
12:29But it wasn't any time soon.I mean, it was like three years, yeah.But, you know, of course, that's not the ideal situation.But at our age, you're going to come across things that are going to be around.Listen, I agree 100%.Like, I was, when Jeff and I were separated, we both had.partners, other partners. We were married and we still had significant others in our life, right?And so we were separated at the time with the intention of getting divorced. And I didn't have any,
13:04I didn't feel any guilt about that. It just, you know, it was in my mind, obviously thingsdid not work out that way, thank God. But in my mind, we were separated. We were two separatesingle people. So I don't know.And I don't, I never sort of ran into an instance where even when I was first dating,anybody really gave a shit, like as long as you're separated, not living in the same house,blah, blah, blah.Right.I think credit to Dolores is that credit to, credit to Dolores, he took a lot of shit on the chin
13:35because there was no reason for it.And people will always look for a reason to like, you know, put the attention on it.I didn't look at it as that critical because of it, to me, it's ending of, you know,it's dissolving some paperwork and the relationship was already over.We've already moved on.We're all in different parts of our life.So to me, it was like the final frontier.By the end of the gen, it was bothering me so much.
14:04Like to the point of that, I was very, you know, upset to see that people would say thisto Dolores or Comato that way because now I felt responsible, which I think,should be because I should have, you know, I should have cleared that up beforehand, but I wasn'tat a position in my life where it was that top priority. And when I, when I, when me and Doloresbecame that, that item, that became a priority. It just, it took some, these things take time.And I don't care. Someone says it should really take one year or two years. I don't care.It took what it took. And that's what it took. Well, it's not just you, you know, trying to work itthrough. There's someone else in this scenario. Okay, so factor you guys out of it. But from,
14:42what you've been through, to our listeners who might be dating someone who's separated,do you think there's any absolutes, like, cut it off if this person doesn't seem to want to getdivorced? Is there any red flags in terms of dating somebody who's not fully divorced?If someone has no intention of getting divorced, do not stay with that person in a seriousrelationship, because at the end of the day, this was my problem. I had met his ex. I likedhis ex. It's not like this was like a real marriage, but technically, legally, if something happenedto Paul, I would be calling his ex to get my stuff out of the house. Like, that was my biggestproblem. And, and, or God forbid, something happened to Paul and there needed to be a life or death
15:30decision, I wouldn't be able to have made it because I wasn't his wife yet. I'm giving him my lifeevery day my family my job i'm sharing my time my youth with whatever's left of my my age with himand at the end of the day the important important things you are not a part of because i've beenin the hospital with my mom one time and the person in the next room choked on a hamburgerand his girlfriend he had never gotten formally divorced legally divorced and his girlfriend wasthrown out of the room and his ex that he had been separated with for so long came in untiltook over. So that always weighed heavy on me. And that's why I say not to let that drag outtoo long. If you're in a serious relationship with someone, that has to be done. I knew Paul
16:20was legally working on it because I was here for the conversations. I was here for the phonecalls with the attorney. At one point, his attorney got sick and had a heart attack. And that pushedit off. So none of this was Paul's fault. This was what was my fault?initially for getting back to your question is if you're out, you should be out.Yeah, he drives his feet long.My advice is, I wish I had it done it sooner, not because of anything to do with my ex,but because of the situation in my life.And really, if you're out, get out, put the paper together.
16:54That's it.And if you're serious, listen, people meet other people and that's the reason they split upand they move on and that's the direction.If you're with somebody, I think the best advice somebody can have.if you're with somebody who is still married,as long as you, the person that you're datingand the person that they are married toare all on the same page
17:12and you understand the process and the goal is,hey, we're getting divorced,this is my new life, blah, blah, blah, blah.It doesn't always work that way.If that's a scenario,then everybody should be comfortable,then the noise on the outsideshouldn't really matter.
17:23First of all, that is what you just said is so keybecause the truth is when I was separated,Jeff did not want to get divorced.And the person I was with at the time,knew that and so we would go around about that but I think that's so interesting thatDolores you know knew that that's where you were both headed because Dolores beingDolores of course became friendly with your ex yeah like only Dolores could in thesescenarios yeah but knowing that you were both that everybody was on the same page I think
17:55that's probably huge right that's to me it was a big part even though listen there's sometricky moments of that as well like it's not a walk in the park right how longit's being separate or not, it's still like, it's, it's the pressure, right?Attorneys get involved.There's money involved and that's always, obviously.And then there's also then there's like you as a person for Dolores, I felt guilty.I felt bad.I felt like this is not going fast enough.
18:20But I have to ask you, did you feel less bad because I didn't fight with you?Would it have been?That's a great question.Would you have done it quicker?No.Had I put pressure on you?No.Because I went as quick as I could actually.
18:34go i did not so i didn't go slow because of any reason listen unfortunately the attorney had a heartattack going to court with the documents that's so crazy i was like that's a sign but get better let'sgo back at it again because we have to we have to finish this you know actually her attorney calledthe hospital called the ambulance for him was a very yeah on yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah so like what wasi going to do but he's getting fuss but he's healthy now he's back yeah he's fine but but i was i i was gettingfrustrated, but I held my tongue because of a couple things.Number one is pride.And I feel if I have to ask someone to do the right thing, it's already too late.
19:14And the other reason is because there's a lot of things to fight over.And I did see that he was moving along with that.My boyfriend's professor is way too friendly.And now I'm seriously suspicious.Oh, wait a minute, Sam.Maybe her boyfriend's just looking for extra.credit. Well, Dakota, it's back to school week on the OK story time podcast, so we'll find outsoon. This person writes, my boyfriend has been hanging out with his young professor a lot.
19:44He doesn't think it's a problem, but I don't trust her. Now, he's insisting we get to knoweach other, but I just want her gone. Now, hold up. Isn't that against school policy? Thatsounds totally inappropriate. Well, according to this person, this is her boyfriend's formerprofessor and they're the same age. And it's even more likely that they're cheating. He insiststhere's nothing between them. I mean, do you believe him? Well, he's certainly trying to get this person toleave him because he now wants them bothto meet. So, do we find out ifthis person's boyfriend really cheated with his professor
20:10or not? To hear the explosive finale,listen to the OK Storytime podcast on theIHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or whereveryou get your podcast.Hello, it's Daniel Fischel, writerstrong, and Wilfredel from Podmeet'sWorld. And we're bringing you VivaLas Content. That's right.
20:26We are back in Las Vegas,the city of sin, andgiving the people what they want.A full week of Y2K.content. Wait, we're back in Vegas? Tell me why. Well, for the Backstreet Boys residency at Sphere,of course. We sat down with Kevin Richardson and A.J. McLean just minutes before they took the stage,and our very own Wilfredel basically became the newest member of the band. Boy band, please.Plus, the man who has the longest running comedy show on the strip joins us and gets his props.
20:58It's carrot top, baby. And finally, we all L-O-V-E-Hur, Ashley Simpson-R. Ashley Simpson-R.joins us to talk about her upcoming sold-out Vegas residency.It's a full week of nostalgic interviews you don't want to miss.Listen to PodMeets World on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.My name is Ed. Everyone say hello, Ed.From a very rural background myself, my dad is a farmer and my mom is a cousin, so like it's not like...What do you get when a true crime producer walks into a comedy club?I know it sounds like the start of a bad joke, but that really was my...
21:34reality nine years ago.I just normally do straight stand-up, but this is a bit different.On stage stood a comedian with a story that no one expected to hear.The 22nd of July 2015, a 23-year-old man had killed his family.And then he came to my house.So what do you get when a true crime producer walks into a comedy club?A new podcast called Wisecrack, where stand-up comedy and murder takes center stage.Available now.
22:12Listen to Wisecrack on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.What would you do if one bad decision forced you to choose between a maximum security prisonor the most brutal boot camp designed to be hell on earth?Unfortunately for Mark Lombardo, this was the choice he faced.He said, you are a number, a New York State number, and we own you.Shock incarceration, also known as boot camps, are short-term, highly regimented correctional programs that mimic military basic training.These programs aim to provide a shock of prison life, emphasizing strict discipline, physical training, hard labor, and rehabilitation programs.Mark had one chance to complete this program and had no idea of the hell awaiting him.
23:01him the next six months. The first night was so overwhelming and you don't know who's next toyou. And we didn't know what to expect in the morning. Nobody tells you anything. Listen to shockincarceration on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast.Hi, I'm Janica Lopez. And in the new season of the Overcover podcast, I'm taking you on anexciting journey of self-reflection. Am I ready to enter this new part of my life? Like, am I readyto be in a relationship? Am I ready to have kids?and to really just devote myself and my time.I wanted to be successful on my own,
23:36not just because of who my mom is.Like, I felt like I needed to be betteror work twice as hard as she did.Join me for conversations about healing and growth.Life is freaking hard.And growth doesn't happen in comfort.It happens in motion, even when you're hurting.All from one of my favorite spaces, The Kitchen.
23:56Honestly, these are going to come out so freaking amazing.Be a part of my new.chapter and listen to the new season of the Overcomfit Podcast as part of the MyCulturaPodcast Network on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast.I love all of this, especially for our listeners. I don't pretend to know what to tell. People,when I got separated and then back together, I told the story that like the entire neighborhood,all the women, people strangers started calling me to ask how that happened and how Idid it. I was like, I don't know how the guy did it. I got lucky. I don't know what to say.
24:34But I think that's so what you just said like Dolo about, if you have to make it happen,you know, if you're pushing, maybe that's key, right? Like for those of us, for listeners who aremaybe in relationships after having been divorced or one is still married, to not, if you're pushing,pushing, get divorce, get divorce, get divorce. Maybe that is a red flag. I think if you're with somebody.But also, Paul, some people do.need a fire lid under their ass.Like, I don't blame anyone for pushing that issue.Depends on the relationship that you're coming from,
25:10the marriage you're coming from.It's so...There can be manipulation on different sides.It is really, honestly, so different for each couple and each person.You just have to read the room.You have to read...Paul wasn't shady about anything.You know if a guy's shady at our age, part two.
25:28Right, right.You know who's being shady.Right.If you don't, then you're in trouble being out in this world.Is your head out of your ass and focus?And listen to your friends, listen to your mom.My mom wasn't happy.So you getting divorced?
25:42I had friends saying he'll never get divorced.We had...Very close friends, actually.Oh, he'll never get divorced.He'll never marry her.Now, I could have taken that and fought with him about it,but there's no way I let other people's opinions define my decisions in life, ever.Can I say something, right?
26:01People say he will never marry her.I don't think that's a reflect.That's a bad reflection on Dolores, not me.I know, I don't think they're, you know, if somebody says that,why would you, what makes you believe that?This is probably the best woman in the world to be with.She's supportive.She'll do anything for you.
26:19She does everything for everybody.She doesn't want anything back, right?So as, as perspective, that person who's writing that or who's saying that about her.It's insulting.Yeah, it's insulting to Loris.Right.You were stuck and you called, she would.right so i just kind of thought of it sometimes i'm like uh there there is that's why you don't
26:38listen to people paul i don't listen to some of them are close someone of are closer were you affectedsometimes by opinions that you read and think people that called you and got you worked upabout things were you affected i i i can't say to you to be the way i am i don't expect thatfor me the truth is the effect being effective is how it affects you not me to me to me iI don't care about reality lifestyle.It doesn't bother me in this light.I came into this, and a person that's already accomplished,I've done my thing, and I'm going to keep on doing it.
27:10Yeah.This is her position in life, and I'm going to support that.Yeah.Or not care less.I don't really care.No, I get that.I love that.I get that it is, like, insulting.
27:19Like, who wouldn't feel like they stepped in a golden pile of shit if they get Dolores, right?Thank you.So, like, of course, you want to end.Who would it?I love that you said that.What I want to say to couples.listening part two second time around there is by now a lot of people in your life that have a lotof opinions about how you live your life because there's times you've reached out when you're
27:45single and you don't have that person so you reach out to your friends you reach out to your familyand then that gives them the right to weigh in on the decisions you make in your life becauseyou've gone to them so I want people to also understand althoughpeople, you can allowthem because they've been therefor you to have their opinion, you don't haveto listen to them, because the real peoplewill be there in the end. You should
28:11hear them. This is the opinion.You should hear them, butthey're not always right.Listen, and especiallyif you're on your second time around or yourthird, you know stuff now that you didn'tknow when you were young and dumb.And you do things
28:27right at our age, afteryou've had this life experience and you'vebeen through the pain of going through breakup or breakups, right?You are wiser than ever and know it's better for you than anyone else does, at least, right?Because I had people say to me, don't get back together.You haven't really tried yet.Yeah.You haven't put yourself out there.
28:49And I'm talking about people that were my closer who loved me, said it to me out of love.But Jen, why would you do this yet?Even if it didn't work out with this first guy, you haven't given yourself a chance.And saying it to me out of, again, out of love and care, but I had to trust myself.And I had it as well, I knew what was right for me.I might not have if I was 25 going into my first marriage.And you may have been wrong too.And that would have been okay.
29:19But somebody who's been married for 25, 30 years is telling you, oh, maybe you should do some more.Maybe you weren't really out there.It's damn that wants to go out there.Yeah, right?Yeah.They want to live through your eyes because they know that they're miserable.At the end,yeah, why aren't you having a good old time, right?
29:37But it's hard being single.It's really fucking hard being single.It is agreed.It's hard being single as a woman.It's hard being single as a man.It's hard starting over.All of it is a bitch.It's true.
29:52Honestly, I can say this.Being single or being with the right person, there's no comparison.Yeah, being single.having fun, I get it. It's great. You go around. I bet you did. Amen.You go your own, you do what's well. Yeah.You have a companion, having that person, that's your, yeah, everything, right?There's nothing better than that. I agree with you.On the worst day, yeah. Well, so let's just get into for a minute to the kids of it all.
30:18So, uh, different second time around for you both, obviously, because you have these, these children,these adult children in Dolores's world and a little different for you, Paul. So how,was that, right? So was that difficult to navigate? Because I knowI know now that the children, no big shock here, lovethat Dolores' kids love you, Paul, and Paul's kids love youDolo. But was that ever hard? Was that ever tricky? Was it hard becauseDolores' kids were older or because yours were younger?No. It was meant to be. It's organic. Kids never had an issue,
30:53huh? My kids love, my Brooklyn and Cameron loveFrankie and Gabby and vice versa.hang out. It's so it's so rewarding to see how well they get on and the way they like they talk toeach other and they push each other up and it's so organic. But the thing about it is it you squareto have a really long-term relationship. You wouldn't think it's just like new like our relationship.And they're in the same circle of like understanding what they want in life. So it's so cool.How long did you guys wait to introduce each other to your kids? Very quick actually. Really.Yeah. Yeah. So, you know, I mean, that's, I guess, what do you suggest? Wait to me introduce somebody or?
31:39So I lived in the premise that keep everything away from your kids. Don't let them know.And plus you were still married. I was still married. The kid, my kids never knew me to date anybody. I never.You never introduced any other, any of the other women you were dating to your kids?Yeah, someone at a diner, like casually. There was no like, hey, dad's friends coming over.none of thatthat was a mistakeinterestingI do believe I try to protect my children
32:05but they knowthey're not stupidyou know what I meanlike some of the commentsthey made to me like that really seriouslylike come on thatbut I think if you try to protect your childrenactually I understand it
32:17but I don't think it really workslike would you suggest to listenersthat they should wait until theylike obviously you guys knew pretty quicklythat it was going to get seriousand that you guys had something.But other people that you date,would you suggest to our listeners to wait if they,
32:36I mean, is it just so individual?Is it depending upon?Don't forget.We'd probably be with different people, right?So Dolores had been with other people for long relationships.I had been with other people just not met my kids.I chose not to do that for the reason was because I thought the benefit wasthat my children would be less damaged.
32:56Yeah.right i guess there's so much guilt yeah there is so much guilt you want to know something actuallyi think by doing that penalized me to not force the divorce interesting because you know you'reliving this everything's cool this family's nice you know living two lives i don't want to say i wasliving two lives because i think that's a lot of attacks in your brain but i think i was livingI'm not two lives, but living alive.Interesting. Wow.You know, there's a lot of people culturally that say Irish people don't get divorced.
33:31A lot of Irish people don't even get married.They just live together forever, right?Well, listen, you know, we're brought up in a way to believe that no matter what, you make it work.Well, you feel like it's like you just kind of compartmentalize.This is, right.This is going on here.This is going on here.They're separate.
33:47And Ireland's like this size and you break up.They all talk about it.It's like, it's like, yeah.Do you think Irish people like are very, like,concerned about what other people say?It's like a small European.I think everybody's concerned about what everybody says.Well, what about, so speaking of other people as well.
34:06And again, I know a lot of listeners watch the show,but in terms of meeting the X and Paul,for you with Frank the first time, was that difficult?I mean, I know a little bit myself,but tell us the listeners that don't know.The first time I met, Frank, you know what the first time I went to have, family meeting?I was summons to a family meeting.No way.
34:28At the house where they look, Casson, and it was about bills.The kids were leaving the lights on.It was garbage or whatever.So I walked into a family feud.Get out.That about you, but I was invited to.Get out.You know, we still like, even the.
34:50we're divorced, we still parenttogether and we are on thesame page. He'll call me, like, to back me upon this. I'm like, it's like a, you know,yeah. It's a lot to understand.Listen, I mean, you have such aunique situation with Frank Deloresand it's been obviously the topic of
35:06many discussionsand on the show and off the show.So, butdo you think that that was easier for you, Polly,than because they got alongso well? At the beginning was thatmore difficult?I guess so again I didn't watch the show I didn't know anything about I didn't know who Frank was to me
35:26it was just another guy in the gym pumping iron right to me so when I met him I had to understand thathe was for ex right and I made people like troll comments on me and you know this this thisworld is great instigate people like to tell you close friends in a lot of by the way close friendsdid not want to see us all get along close friends waiting on both sides behindI'm, you know, I, I would never have allowed that.Like, I didn't hear it.They didn't win.So, they didn't win.
35:54I know that, Paul.But, like, people are like, bro, you're putting up with, bro.So anyway, so it wasn't that it was hard.It was just very unusual.And I really, and I, and I know I came off, I think it was like the first time I filmed.And I was like, Frank needs to, you know, maybe Frank needs to rethink the situation, right?Because I really didn't understand it.But I'm not the only person that didn't understand it.
36:17There's a whole fucking audience.didn't understand this.But you're also, you also get to be the person that's in love with Dolores and trying.So even more so than the audience, you're trying to reconcile the fact that, that it's adifferent thing than usual.But the weird thing is Paul works with his, his ex.They get along.Yeah.
36:35They've gone to family weddings together over all these years.I don't see a big difference.Yeah. Interesting.So the big thing was, and the big thing was, I think Frank seen Dolores in a different line from herpast for maybe relationships, right?And he may be seen a different trend in Dolores, right?And I think maybe Frank's an alpha male, right?And I'm kind of one of the guys as well to be like, hey, listen, this is, you know,
37:01I'm here now.See you later, bro.We're good, right?Right.You don't need to go and stick a dick on my head and drink and cocktails, right?We're good, right?But we can hang out.So I think Frank was having a hard time knowing that the dynamic of his relationship with
37:17Dolores may change, but not in a bad way, just in the normality of like, you know, what'shappening. And I think at that point, maybe we were feeding off each other and it kind of gotlike a little bit like different. Right. Because what's, you know, but at the end of the day,we're, we're all breakers.My boyfriend's professor is way too friendly and now I'm seriously suspicious. Oh,wait a minute, Sam. Maybe her boyfriend's just looking for extra credit.Dakota, it's back to school week on the OK Storytime podcast, so we'll find out soon.This person writes, my boyfriend has been hanging out with his young professor a lot.
37:56He doesn't think it's a problem, but I don't trust her.Now, he's insisting we get to know each other, but I just want her gone.Now, hold up.Isn't that against school policy?That sounds totally inappropriate.Well, according to this person, this is her boyfriend's former professor, and they're the same age.And it's even more likely that they're cheating.He insists there's nothing between them.
38:14I mean, do you believe him?Well, he's certainly trying to get this person to believe him because he's.he now wants them both to meet.So, do we find out if this person's boyfriend really cheated with his professor or not?To hear the explosive finale, listen to the OK Storytime podcast on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast.Hello, it's Daniel Fischel, writer Strong, and Wilfredel from PodMeets World.And we're bringing you Viva Las Content.That's right. We are back in Las Vegas, the city of sin, and giving the people what they want.
38:45A full week of Y2K content.Wait, we're back in Vegas?Tell me why.Well, for the Backstreet Boys residency at Sphere, of course.We sat down with Kevin Richardson and A.J. McLean just minutes before they took the stage,and our very own Wilfredel basically became the newest member of the band.Boy band, please.Plus, the man who has the longest running comedy show on the strip joins us and gets his props.
39:10It's carrot top, baby.And finally, we all L-O-V.She-E-Hur, Ashley Simpson-Ross, joins us to talk about her upcoming sold-out Vegas residency.It's a full week of nostalgic interviews you don't want to miss.Listen to PodMeets World on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.The Super Secret Festi Club podcast Season 4 is here.And we're locked in.That means more juicy chees-me.
39:38Terrible love advice.Evil spells to cast on your ex.No, no, no, no, we're not doing that this season.Oh, well, this season we're leveling up.Each episode will feature a special bestie, and you're not going to want to miss it.Get in here!Today we have a very special guest with us.Our new super secret bestie is The diva of the people.
39:57The diva of the people.I'm just like text your ex.My theory is that if you need to figure out that the stove is hot, go and touch it.Go and figure it out for yourself.Okay.That's us.That's us.My name is Curley.
40:13And I'm Maya.In each episode, we'll talk about love, friendship, heartbrates, men, and of course, our favorite secrets.Listen to the Super Secret Bestie Club as a part of the My Cultura podcast network available on the IHartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast.A foot washed up a shoe with some bones in it. They had no idea who it was.Most everything was burned up pretty good from the fire that not a whole lot was salvageable.These are the coldest of cold cases.But everything is about to change.Every case that is a cold case that has DNA.
40:49Right now in a backlog will be identified in our lifetime.A small lab in Texas is cracking the code on DNA.Using new scientific tools,they're finding clues in evidence so tiny you might just miss it.He never thought he was going to get caught.And I just looked at my computer screen.I was just like, ah, got you.On America's crime lab, we'll learn about victims and survivors.
41:13And you'll meet the team behind the scenes at Othrum,the Houston Lab that takes on the most hopeless casesto finally solve the unsolvable.Listen to America's Crime Lab on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts,or wherever you get your podcasts.My name is Ed. Everyone say hello, Ed.Hello, Ed.I'm from a very rural background myself.
41:35My dad is a farmer.And my mom is a cousin.So, like, it's not like...What do you get when a true crime producer walks into a comedy club?I know it sounds like the start of a bad joke, but that really was my reality nine years ago.I just normally do straight stand-up, but this is a bit different.On stage stood a comedian with a story that no one expected to hear.The 22nd of July 2015, a 23-year-old man had killed his family.
42:06And then he came to my house.So what do you get when a true crime producer walks up?to a comedy club, a new podcast called Wisecrack, where stand-up comedy and murder takes centerstage.Available now.Listen to Wisecrack on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.Okay, so how about this kind of hotspot?Right now, we're hearing a lot about pre-ups.
42:40So I want to know your thoughts on pre-ups.I can just, let me just start out.I'll share my own thoughts.If Jeff and I were divorced and I was getting married again,I would absolutely have a pre-nup,but also I don't even know if I'd want to get married again.So that's whatever.Who cares?
42:58That's me.But how do you guys feel?Honestly, we haven't even spoke about a pre-nup,only because, I mean, it's not even a...People say it's a real conversation,but it's really not.I mean, you go into something with that mindset, you're already, you're in a different placealready.
43:18I'm not thinking like that.Are you?Like, and I'm not saying, and I'm watching what's going on in the world and all these thingsthat are happening.I'm not saying they're not good for you and they don't protect you, but I'm not, we'renot there.Yeah, I mean, the biggest thing that we have to figure out is, you know, where we go to vacation.That's, you know, we're not.
43:38We like that right now.I'm good.I do you think that's partially because, I mean,you both are coming to the tablevery independently, you know?Nobody, you don't, neither one of youneeds the other financially.At least that's what I know.
43:56So maybe that's also, do you think that makes a difference?When I met Dolores, I'm going to say thisbecause I wanted to be on record because this is what happened.When I met Dolores, another thing,Frank did a lot of stuff for her,and I wanted her to be independent of that.not because I didn't want Frank doing it,because she's able to own that herself.
44:14And I feel that a woman that's independentgets more confident within herselfto be able to like, you know, just be in a moment, capitalize them.Every woman should handle their own finances.Every woman should handle their own things that they own.They need to understand it.They really do because God knows what happens.I've seen it on.
44:37I think that is so key.I love that you're saying that out loud.I think that is so important.And I can tell you, yes, I could tell you before Jeff and I got separated,he put a paper in front of me and said sign, I signed.Not that I don't, and I trust Jeff implicitly, but I'm an adult.And I need to know, factor out everything else.It's my responsibility to know what I'm doing, what I'm signing, what my finances are.
45:04100%.And you have the right to know and it's not wrong to ask.Right. I think, you know what? And I'll just, I'll just say, Dolores, you said to me many times how much you, like Paul really supported you being independent and financially responsible and which I think is so great, you know, like that he wants that for you. And I think it's easy for women to give up that power and it's dangerous, regardless of prenups or anything else. You know, it's very dangerous because it also puts.them on the on the back door right so spurred a moment deal or anything a scenario comes up she'swell capable of handling that situation more than not that she couldn't but now she's morereassured that now and also god forbid something happens you know if a million years from nowsomebody's partner passes away or my like i need to know what happens next i'm gonna surviveyou can only depend on yourself amen that is yeah it's not that you're not there for me
46:08but no listen i'm all for you yeah listen you guys are so on the same page with so much what do youthink it is if you were just to name a couple things the reason that your relationship works so welllike you're going to pinpoint it's this really stands out there's a there's a lot of compromisei feel like in every relationship compromise is so important because if it's just one personalways bending over backwards bending over it there's always one person that does it more thanthe other, but it has to be both, give and take on both. It really does. Like, what do youthink, like give us an example, like, Dolo, tell us something that you feel like you guys havecompromised on. The thermosicle, no, but there's, yeah, that's true. Is it true,
46:56is Loris? Because you are always complaining, you're too hot. You pour, and I'm like,it's Jeff and I fight. That's like one of the main, we can go to war over that. I can't take it.It's war. It's war. I don't compromise.well on that it's day to day you know even on on the things that we like to eat there wascompromise on sometimes how we spent the holidays or you know just listen everything is a compromisebecause it's new right like he hates Italian food but I want to eat it sometimes so I'll eateight five nights a week and then when I finally say I want Italian food he has to go and eat withme I don't want to eat it alone who hates Italian food what does that even mean it makes me so
47:38There's no, what, pasta?Violetly sick.Really?Sproop it out.I eat it.I look at her and I'm going to go,we need to go out.Are you serious?
47:50But no, but even if there were different things in our relationships or our lives when we cameinto it, that wasn't ideal for us or that we didn't love.There's certain things I had to put up with and then he would, you know, he would say,okay, well, you did that.So let me come and do this.Then I don't want to do it.You have to do it.I believe.
48:08the biggest thing is letting it go straight away.Oh, that's the, yeah.So we, so if something comes up and it could be anything,and it could be absolutely fucking anything,you have that moment.I love that because I'm stubborn.I, and I have learned to be less stubborn.It's just so much easier if you can let it go.
48:27But do you think in terms of the hurdles that you've had,well, I have two questions.First, was the show a big hurdle for you, Paul?And, and also just outside of the show,what would you say is, was one of the major hurdles for both of you?I think for me, the show was because I didn't know what I was getting involved inbecause I never taught it true because I was just for horror.So I was just like, oh, I'm just with Dolores having fun.
48:52And then it becomes reality.You're on a TV, right?And you see all these things that come out and you listen to all the knives.So did it.That was a problem for us.It did play an effect because I think that emphasized with the whole Frank situation.so now does it you knowthen I've got these guys friends of mine
49:11people I don't even know oh my Godhow could you let this guy be in her lifeso disrespectful because they don'tknow this scenario right soit's like anything manyou can you imagine talking to somebody like thatwho's happy going about their businessand then you got to call
49:26well it's it's aboutlearning right so you have to learn the processso the show was a big learning curve to menow water off my backnow it's wateror if it's back, but when it wasn't, it wasn't easy.Well, it wasn't easy.We piled through that.
49:43Listen, the show is, and I've only been a friend of for two years, it's all encompassing.It changes, it definitely changes everything.The biggest part of that is well is letting go.At the start, I couldn't figure out how to let it go.And then as you realize, wait, this is, this is just the show, this is, then you start,then you go, okay, actually, you know what I think the show helped us become much better couple.Really?yeah in the wow what do you think and then on the outside i mean sorry again on the outside i mean
50:14everywhere i go people come out to me like you know we love dolores we love dolores oh my god likelike i facetime all the time of people coming up to me everywherei mean i'm not going to say yeah no it's pretty cool and i do like it you know i mean you getsome other i like i like it too i like to know that i want people to know that dolores and i areare not only friends, but such close friends.I'm very proud of that.We're very close friends, yes.Tell me about you, Dolores.
50:41What is you, you think one of your biggest hurdles was?What in the relationship?Paul was very temperamental in the beginning of filming regarding, like, what would people think?What, what they said?I felt like he was definitely influenced by something he read, saying one comment.There'll be 25 good comments.comments than one bad comment. He would harp on. So my biggest hurdle was patience for that.Yeah. It really was. That was my biggest hurdle. You were teaching me. You were also advising me not to fall into the trap.
51:18But the fact they saw on the other side of it, sometimes I didn't think that you would.I will tell you, Jan, people very close were the worst of the comments than people far away.I am very sad. I know that to be true. And it makes me sad.and confused, really?It's depressing a little bit.It just goes to show you how money people are really unhappy for someone else's happiness.So when you see people happy, they try to make an unhappy situation.And that's the part about the second part of being I do.
51:51When you've been true, that kind of stuff doesn't really affect you.Yeah.Because during the second part.And the second part of I do is the insecurity of the exes, right?They're the least threat in the room.They're talked aboutIt's old newsKeep your eye on the new people around
52:10Not the X'sI hate to say itBut I actually think that's good adviceThat's so fucking goodThe X's know them better than youGet them know the XNo one knows the exThe new Snoopies
52:22The new what does that meanSnoopy SnoopiesDo you know what that means?What does that mean?Noopin, Snoopin' SnoopOh, I'm picturingCharlie BrownMe too, no
52:32The new people snoop aroundTell me something, guys, and then I'm going to let you go, but, and I'm sorry to ask the questionbecause you just get asked all the time, but I know that listeners want to know.So you think you're going to get probably hitched sometime soon?Do you have a time frame?I mean, I'd say we're having to get engaged first, right?Yep.I have to ask because I know what people want to know.
52:57And I've heard you asked so many times.It's not like, you know.Oh, my God.It's not mad at me and watch what happens in diabetes.like, so what's that? I said, he goes, what's your goal? I said, getting married isn't thegoal. Peace and harmony is the goal. And I could tell you, we've never been so good. No.We've really, I'm ready to go, would it? I need time.Listen, there's no backing out now. I look at you guys and I can't imagine one without the other.
53:24But there's always like the Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell of it. You know, I mean, look how longthey've lasted. People do believe in that. Yeah. You know, not needing toactually sign a paper we're good and we're going to get better that's all yeah I mean what Ilove to say Paul's my husband I slipped yesterday and I said that who was I talking to I said my husbandI'm like oh oh I mean my boyfriend you know I say that I say that sometimes to Paul I'll be like yeahI spoke to your wife and maybe even to you Dolores it's just like for me it just makes senseyeah um I just couldn't love either one of you any more than I do it's a nice title to have but I wishanybody the second time around
54:02all the best it's so hardbe careful who youwind up with don't makedecisions at a vulnerable timegoing through divorce is veryvulnerable very scary beingsingle is very scary very vulnerabletake off
54:19you know look at the red flagstake off the rose colored glasseslearn from your mistakeslearn from your age and your experiencesdon't be afraid of beingsome of privatewith some of your stuff.I love that too.
54:34Boundaries.That's interesting.Don't rush for anything.You know, I want to impart,I'm sure you feel like this too.Frankie just got engagedand I know how much you love your soon-to-be new daughter-in-law.And I find myself with my kids wanting to control
54:48who they're dating,seeing things that I know that they don't see because they're too young to see it.I have to give that up.That's what therapy is for.I give up that control.Who knows?I don't know everything.You know, I have to trust that they're going to pick partners because it's so important that will, you know, enrich their lives and make them happy and peaceful and feel good about themselves.
55:10It doesn't always work, though, as we all know, the first time around, but I want them to know what I know and they just won't and they don't.I wish they did.I wish that I could go back and, you know, they can know what I know now, right?They need to hear it.Don't stop saying it.Yeah.No, it once.You say it's one.
55:30and it's in their head.And when those times happen where they're like,does this seem right?And then they hear your little voice in their head.That's great.I love that because they both get really,really pissed at me.They want me out of their business
55:43when it comes to their love life.Say it and drop it.Stop it and drop it.Yep.Thank you.Both of you.I love you so much.Thank you.
55:53I love you.All right.Bye you guys.Bye, bye.So are you in the midst of a divorceor feeling stuff?on what to do when it comes to your love life, call us or email us or follow us on social.All of the information will be in the show notes.
56:09Make sure to rate and review the podcast.I do part two at IHeartRadio podcast where a falling in love is the main objective.Hi, my name is Enya Jumanzor.And I'm Drew Phillips.And we run a podcast.podcast called Emergency Intercom.If you're a crime junkie and you love crimes, we're not the podcast for you.But if you have unmedicated ADHD...
56:42Oh my God, perfect.And want to hear people with mental illness, psychobabble.Yes, yes.Then Emergency Intercom is the podcast for you.Open your free IHeartRadio app.Search Emergency Intercom and listen now.Every case that is a cold case that has DNA right now in a backlog,will be identified in our lifetime.
57:02On the new podcast, America's Crime Lab,every case has a story to tell,and the DNA holds the truth.He never thought he was going to get caught,and I just looked at my computer screen.I was just like, ah, gotcha.This technology's already solving so many cases.Listen to America's Crime Lab
57:21on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts,or wherever you get your podcasts.I just normally do straight stand-up,but this is a bit different.What do you get when a true crime?crime producer walks into a comedy club.Answer, a new podcast called Wisecrack, where a comedian finds himself at the center of achilling true crime story.
57:40Does anyone know what show they've come to see?It's a story.It's about the scariest night of my life.This is Wisecrack, available now.Listen to Wisecrack on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.Hi, it's Honey German, and I'm back with season two of my podcast.Grazias.Come again.
58:00We got you when it comes to the latest in music and entertainmentwith interviews with some of your favorite Latin artists and celebrities.You didn't have to audition?No, I didn't audition.I haven't auditioned in like over 25 years.Oh, wow.That's a real G-talk right there.Oh, yeah.
58:15We'll talk about all that's viral and trendingwith a little bit of cheesement and a whole lot of laughs.And of course, the great bevras you've come to expect.Listen to the new season of Dacias Come Again on the IHeartRadio app,Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast.What would you do if one bad decision forced you to choose between a maximum security prisonor the most brutal boot camp designed to be hell on earth?Unfortunately for Mark Lombardo, this was the choice he faced.
58:46He said, you are a number, a New York State number, and we own you.Listen to shock incarceration on the Iheart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.This is an IHeart podcast.
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