The Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast - You've Got a Friend in Me with Ellen Goltzer
Episode Date: December 22, 2023Ashley is hanging out at the Bachelor Mansion with Ellen Goltzer from The Golden Bachelor! Everyone gets choked up when Ellen shares the story of her close friend that helped her sign up for the Gerry...'s seasonAnd, Ellen spills to Ashley her secret to being fully booked for dates for the next month!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Hi, my name is Enya Eumanzor.
And I'm Drew Phillips.
And we run a podcast called Emergency Intercom.
If you're a crime junkie and you love crimes, we're not the podcast for you.
But if you have unmedicated ADHD...
Oh my God, perfect.
And want to hear people with mental illness, psychobabble.
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Everyone thinks they'd never join a cult.
But it happens all the time to people just like you.
And people just like us.
I'm Lola Blanc.
And I'm Megan Elizabeth.
We're the host of Trust Me, a podcast about cults, manipulation, and the psychology
of belief.
Each week, we talk to fellow survivors, former believers, and experts to understand why
people get pulled in and how they get out.
Trust me.
New episodes every Wednesday on Exactly Right.
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Hey everyone, it's Ashley and I have the lovely Ellen from the Golden Bachelor here.
Ellen, your storyline to me was probably like one of the ones that made me feel the most.
Because right off the bat, we hear about your friend who passed away.
And I think that was like the first time I cried during the Golden Bachelor.
Oh my God.
And then maybe you at the reunion show was probably the last time I cried.
Oh, God.
They really just brought it out of me.
I mean, like he really pulled me out of my cover in zone because I'm not good with that.
And, you know, first I had to see the rejection with Gary, which was hard.
And, you know, I've come to terms with it and everything.
And I really have it really helped me.
But we finished that.
And then he was like, but we can't like go without leaving without talking about Roberta.
I'm like, oh, no, this is going to be a double whammy.
I mean, it's really going to get to me.
And the truth is when he started bringing that out, it started like saying, well,
I probably would never have had this experience if it wasn't for her and Roberta.
And then when he said, I said, you know, I miss her a lot.
And I sort of got teary, which I usually I'm okay with that, you know, I was,
usually controlled, but then when he said, like, there's someone here that wants to see you,
and I was like, who, like, don't freak my kids are here or somebody.
I mean, it's just Courtney.
And I said, oh, my God, I wasn't even supposed to leave the stage.
I wasn't supposed to get up.
I said, I don't, I'm making the rules.
And I went down and I just like, it was amazing.
Oh, what was the last time you had seen her?
I see her a lot.
I do, but not in California.
Yeah.
You know, I mean, I'm staying at her mom's house, Roberta's house, for the summers,
because she had bought a condo in my community and was her wish to live near us with our fiancé,
and he bought her a condo in my community.
She said, I'm retiring so you can use my office of the bedroom.
You know, Roger really well.
It's just going to be for the summer, like camp.
You know, and we had one summer together, and it was done, so I'm still there, and she's not.
So it's really freaky.
But Courtney's been coming to visit and go through stuff with me and, you know, stuff like that.
So she's like a daughter.
I mean, we know, Bert and I know each other since we're 10 years old.
So it's been a whirlwind.
It is very high emotions, low emotions, feelings all over the place, which is so not like me.
Oh.
You and Roberta, when did you sign yourself up for the show with her?
I think she sort of started.
thing, right? Well, it wasn't team at all.
Oh, it wasn't? She just did it completely.
No, she did. No, I did it, but she gave me such guilt that this is my life right now.
You're my best friend forever. We watched The Bachelor 20 years together. I need to see this first.
That's why the first episode was so meaningful. Because I need to see this first episode with you.
I need to get there, have a destination, have a desire to keep going. And how are you going to get me?
I'm so sorry.
But I just want you to do it for me.
And I said, no, I can't do that.
She said, you're going to tell someone that you love since you're 10 years old with stage
four cancer that doesn't have a really good prognosis that you can't do the one thing.
Just apply.
So you didn't even want to go.
No, I don't want to do it.
No.
So I just apply.
And I said, okay, what's big deal?
I'll apply.
Nothing's going to happen.
I mean, literally.
I mean, it's 30.
thousand people applying. I'm just going to apply. So I didn't care. And I cared enough for her,
but I just did it. And then when the casting producers came on and I was like, go, go for it.
Ask me whatever you want. I don't care. And I was so relaxed because, you know, J.R. was so cute.
And it was just really nice. And he said, wow, you're so naturally, you're so calm. I'm like,
oh, okay. I want to say to him because I really don't want to do this. You're like, oh, no,
I was too comfortable. I was too comfortable. I was too.
comfortable and he sensed that and then one thing led to another the next thing i know i'm being
fingerprinted and getting a background check i go oh my god i hope they don't find out about what's his
name was i was kidding and they thought it was funny but i was just trying to be funny just to do it but
it was really a lot of fun so when you found out that gary was going to be the golden bachelor
had you had already been casted cast no as a matter of fact i was yes i was really casted without
knowing if i remember correctly
I was anticipating his back being turned around.
So we saw that one poster.
Knowing that I knew I was going, but I wasn't sure if I was definitely going, I was waiting for the call to come.
They said, get ready.
This is going to be it.
But I didn't know until he turned around.
And when he turned around, I was like, ooh, yummy.
He's cute, you know.
And I didn't mean yummy, you know what I mean.
No, we like it.
We like it.
But he was really not hard on the eyes.
And I was like, oh, he sounds really nice.
And he's got a cute personality.
And he turned out to be a really great guy.
He just wasn't a guy for me.
And I wasn't the girl for him.
And it taught me a lot.
He made very good choices tonight.
He did exactly what he should have done.
So I am really happy for her.
I was her roommate also for a month.
It was a crazy month.
But I sincerely was happy for her.
I'm happy for her and a family.
they have a whole plan, you know, the whole exciting thing about the way.
It's just going to be really fun.
What would you do if one bad decision forced you to choose between a maximum security prison
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know what to expect in the morning. Nobody tells you anything. Listen to shock incarceration on the
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My name is Ed. Everyone say, hello, Ed.
Hello, Ed.
I'm from a very rural background myself.
My dad is a farmer, and my mom is a cousin.
So, like, it's not...
What do you get when a true crime producer walks into a comedy club?
I know it sounds like the start of a bad joke, but that really was my reality nine years ago.
I just normally do straight stand-up, but this is a bit different.
On stage stood a comedian with a story that no one expected to hear.
The 22nd of July 2015, a 23-year-old man had killed his family.
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So what do you get when a true crime producer walks into?
a comedy club, a new podcast called Wisecrack, where stand-up comedy and murder takes
center stage.
Available now.
Listen to Wisecrack on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
I'm Dr. Joy Harden Bradford, and in session 421 of therapy for black girls, I sit down with
Dr. Ophia and Billy Shaka to explore how our hair connects to our identity, mental health,
and the ways we heal.
I think hair is a complex language system, right, in terms of it can tell how old you are,
your marital status, where you're from, you're a spiritual belief.
But I think with social media, there's like a hyperfixation and observation of our hair, right?
That this is sometimes the first thing someone sees when we make a post or a reel is how our hair is styled.
You talk about the important role hairstylists play in our community,
the pressure to always look put together, and how breaking up with perfection can actually
free us. Plus, if you're someone who gets anxious about flying, don't miss session 418 with
Dr. Angela Neil Barnett, where we dive into managing flight anxiety. Listen to therapy for black
girls on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast.
When you found out that you were officially cast and that Gary was the bachelor and you saw
his picture, what was the conversation like between you and Roberta?
I first I told her I hated her and then I said I'm going to go what happened was I
developed a this is I never told anybody there's a lot of podcasts I never did I developed a abscess on my
cheek and it was like three weeks before I was supposed to go and I said oh my god I can't go
I mean it was really like like a golf ball and I said I don't know what to do and the doctors in
Florida couldn't help but I said I'm going home to New York to my dermatologist so I really
had a lot of faith in and she said I'm getting you on that goddamn lien if it kills me there's no
way I'm not letting a patient of mine be a golden M bachelor rent there's no way so she there's no way
that I'm not allowing my patient she has to go she has to go and dr. D thank you so much because
it wasn't for you and Roberta kept saying to me the whole time that's what I get this from
never say never so you'll meet somebody it may
not be your guy, but whatever, never say never, you're going on that plane, you're going to get to
go, you are not going to look like a monster, you'll be fine. And sure enough, it cleared up like
enough to cover it with makeup. Yeah. And now it's much better, but it was, it was really scary. And I
knew that I wasn't going to go. That's how bad it was. So, but she kept motivating me. And she said,
I said, how much you really want me to go? Look at me. My boy said, my, you can't go with it like
that. No, you can't. And she.
She kept saying to the boys, stop, she'll be fine.
And I was.
And I was able to go.
So there was like somebody, a higher power that was way above Roberta or me that really made it really special because I just felt her presence the entire time I was on the show.
But she was still with us then.
She was.
When I got home and I couldn't communicate with her because she was like in a semi-coma state, it was really difficult because I felt her like squeeze my hands.
hand and the next day I didn't feel anything and she was still with me and I said it's okay
this is when it got me at women tell all it's okay go it's okay um I want you to watch it will
watch together different places that's all and that got me because I you know and then I then I
see Courtney right after that and was like oh you're kidding me you know because Courtney was
with me the whole time with all this you know at the hospital this hospice
with everything and I'm just so glad in a way this is terrible to say but I'm really glad I didn't
get it because I wouldn't have been there for her for the last few days and it it wasn't a good match
anyway where we probably would be great friends because we had a lot of fun like he said like
Gary did say to me that he felt we'll sit to everybody I always felt the most comfortable with
Ellen. Like, it didn't, I want to see if there's a romantic, you know, part of this, but I
always felt I could be myself with Ellen. So I knew there would always be a bond and a
friendship, but, yeah, I wouldn't, if I was with him and he picked me, it probably wouldn't
have been a good match, and I wouldn't have been able to say goodbye to her. So everything happens
for a reason. Your friendship is seriously so special. It was very, it feels like, 60 years
a long time. It feels like you guys were, like, so.
I lost my go-to person.
You know, I mean, I have a lot of very good friends in Del Rey.
I have a lot of good friends in New York.
I visit them all the time.
My family is in New York.
But it was something about Roberta that was just, it was a true, honest to goodness, sister friendship.
It really was.
So if anybody ever is lucky enough to have something like that, they are blessed.
So treat each day like it's a gift.
That's what I said during Thanksgiving.
I'm sorry.
she did put you on a path that that like changed your life for sure because
totally you didn't want to go on the show no on the show I know that you took so much
goodness away from it I did and you took a lot of hope from it I did and now you really feel like
you can find love again and I got three dates signed up next three Saturdays in a row
tell us about these men I don't know I wish I did they were like blind date well not blinders
either someone that knows somebody or somebody's grandpa that, you know, I was a teacher of long
time ago or it's just, it's a drink. It's a drink. It's a hello. It's a meeting chat. You know,
that's it. It's an hour. If it's longer than an hour, it could be a dinner date one night,
but I stop at an hour all the time. I haven't dated a long time, but I remember stopping at an hour.
If it really works, then there's time for another date. If it didn't work, it wasn't meant to be
anyway. So the hour is like a healthy hour. I love that because my mom's always taught me leave
when you're having fun, leave them wanting more. Exactly. And I feel like an hour day is the
perfect amount of time because then I think about them or I think about thank God I have to spend
another minute with them. But I'm excited about it and there's a lot of sexy, great, fun, pickleball,
golfing, crazy people, men out there that will be a lot of fun to be with. And I just hope the fact that I was
on the Golden Bachelor, doesn't freak them out a little?
Because it means like, hi, I'd like to be serious.
Well, I'm enough to freak out anybody because I'm crazy and fun nutty.
But the fact that it's part of the program makes them a little bit.
I want them to be themselves.
I don't want them to be like someone they're not, you know.
And that's one thing.
I just always was genuine, I hope.
And I just hope that they are too.
And if they are, then I'll see it.
If they're not, I'll see right through it.
so you are making it sound as if now you have a lot of clarity that you and gary weren't compatible
but when you're on the show you were you were very quick to start confessing your feelings
oh yeah they were real the first one so why the clarity now well what happened was i felt like
he felt very comfortable with me i felt extremely comfortable with him because he was very
attentive and really listen to me and funny and jokes. And he was just totally like not what
they portray as crying machine on television. He was really a lot of fun to be with. And the more
I made him laugh, the more comfortable he got. And I felt comfortable. So I felt the natural
attraction for him because he was very nice to look at. He was a lot of fun to be with. And I said,
I haven't felt this way with a man at a long time.
It's like I'm having these feelings come out.
And then the more I would say after the princess state, oh my God.
I mean, I felt, I mean, this is so out of my comfort zone.
If it's not sneakers and a ripped T-shirt, I'm not happy.
So I walked into this room with these gorgeous gowns and then the earrings.
Hello.
Ooh, pretty.
Thank you.
And it just turned my life.
I saw the sensitive part of me that I never saw before.
You know, I was always the one cracking jokes and being funny.
Ha-ha-ha.
But the truth is that I didn't want to be just funny jokes this time.
I mean, I really dug him.
I mean, I really thought he was really, really cool and nice and funny.
And he brought out a side of me that I didn't know still happen.
And there is that person inside that does want to be that serious, nice, romantic side,
and there's still the fun, silly craziness.
So I would like it to work with someone else.
And someone local would be nice.
I don't want to sell my beautiful.
Oh, no, I love it there, you know.
And I want to make it work.
I mean, I was willing to do 50 and 50, but I don't know if he was because I wasn't
the right person for him anyway.
So Teresa is definitely perfect for him.
They'll be happily ever after.
Aw, that's so sweet.
All right.
Well, we are rooting for you.
And we want updates on these dates.
Can we, you be our golden bachelorette on the almost famous podcast?
And we're going to send you on dates every week.
You're going to report back.
That would be so fun.
I will, but I will not mention names in case it's a.
real dud or something you know i don't want to save the anonymous embarrassment of uh hopefully i will not
have to kiss a lot of frogs just a couple and maybe the one of those frogs will turn into a prince
wouldn't that be nice yes thank you ellen you're such a lady thank you so much for having me
bye follow the ben and ashley i almost famous podcast on iHeart radio or subscribe wherever you
listen to podcasts hi my name is enya umanzor and i'm drew phillips and we run a podcast
called Emergency Intercom.
If you're a crime junkie and you love crimes, we're not the podcast for you.
But if you have unmedicated ADHD...
Oh my God, perfect.
And want to hear people with mental illness, psychobabble.
Yes, yes.
Then Emergency Intercom is the podcast for you.
Open your free IHeartRadio app.
Search Emergency Intercom and listen now.
I just normally do straight stand up, but this is a bit different.
What do you get when a true crime producer walks into a comedy club?
Answer, a new podcast called Wisecrack,
where a comedian finds himself at the center of a chilling true crime story.
Does anyone know what show they've come to see?
It's a story. It's about the scariest night of my life.
This is Wisecrack, available now.
Listen to Wisecrack on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts,
or wherever you get your podcasts.
Everyone thinks they'd never join a call.
But it happens all the time to people just like you.
And people just like us.
I'm Lola Blanc and I'm Megan Elizabeth.
We're the host of Trust Me, a podcast about cults, manipulation, and the psychology of belief.
Each week we talk to fellow survivors, former believers, and experts to understand why people get pulled in and how they get out.
Trust me, new episodes every Wednesday on exactly right.
Listen wherever you get your podcasts.
What would you do if one bad decision forced you to choose between a maximum security prison
or the most brutal boot camp designed to be hell on earth?
Unfortunately for Mark Lombardo, this was the choice he faced.
He said, you are a number, a New York State number, and we own you.
Listen to shock incarceration on the iHeart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
This is an IHeart podcast.