The Ben and Emil Show - GREENLAND: The Fart of the Deal

Episode Date: January 22, 2026

It never ends with Trump, does it folks? This week we're breaking down the entire Greenland fiasco from start to finish, keeping you informed. Pull up a chair and a nice cup of coffee because it's a good one. This week's bonus is a BANGER. Support us and get bonus content, ad-free versions and more plus your first 7 days free at https://benandemilshow.com WATCH THE LATEST EPISODE OF EMIL'S NEW SHOW! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PHG9iIjhXvI OUR NEW CREDIT CARD SITE IS LIVE!!! Go get that AMEX personal card before it's gone! https://thecreditcardlist.com Give this video a thumbs up if you enjoyed it! And please leave us a comment! It helps us! ***Ben's new movies and tv podcast with Dillon is OUT NOW! GO WATCH the latest episode on our TOP MOVIES OF 2025: https://youtu.be/tbC-cMqcby8?si=tO0NK0PmpN2187ir **CHECK OUT EMIL'S LIVESTREAMS HERE: https://www.youtube.com/emilderosa __ SOME OTHER VIDEOS YOU MAY ENJOY: That's Cringe of Cody Ko: https://youtu.be/dTbEk0pVh2w Our AUSTIN VIDEO: https://youtu.be/yGSs56bFzRU Our episode with Kyla Scanlon: https://youtu.be/cIHWkY35cuc Big Tech is out of ideas (ft. ED ZITRON): https://youtu.be/zBvVGHZBpMw Arguing with a millionaire (ft. Chris Camillo): https://youtu.be/1ZUWTkWV_MM We bought suits HERE: https://youtu.be/_cM1XqA9n2U ***LINK TO OUR DISCORD: https://discord.gg/CjujBt8g ***Subscribe to Emil's Substack: https://substack.com/@emilderosa ***Trade with Ben at https://tradertreehouse.com __ FABRIC: Join the thousands of parents who trust Fabric to help protect their family. Apply today in just minutes at https://meetfabric.com/BAES FACTOR: Head to https://factormeals.com/baes50off and use code baes50off to get 50% off your first Factor box plus FREE BREAKFAST FOR ONE YEAR! __ Follow us on instagram! @ benandemilshow @ bencahn @ emilderosa #podcast #comedypodcast #coffeezilla #robinhood #dailyshow #profg #scottgalloway Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Learn more at Adobe.com slash do that with Acrobat. Trump, he announced that he's imposing 10% tariffs starting February 1st on Denmark, Finland, France, Germany, Netherlands, Norway, Sweden, and the UK, with those all increasing to 25% if the U.S. isn't allowed to purchase Greenland by June 1st. World peace is at stake. China and Russia want Greenland, and there is not a thing that Denmark can do about it. They currently have two dog sleds as protection, one added recently. I just McCrone suggested it's technically called the anti-coversion

instrument but it's known as the trade bazookas. You don't hear about bazookas anymore man. You really don't. Oh and by the way, this trade bazooka was originally designed for China, not for allies. Yeah, because that's the weirdest thing. We're doing this to our allies.

All these things Trump is complaining about, NATO, the UN, where we basically have veto power over everything, except for maybe a few, minor things. If you just told Greenland, hey, we need to station some people there. It'd be like, okay, sure, whatever. Can we add a couple dogs, Liz, to the group? The dogs like to play with the soldiers. He's spoken.

Did you see that guy, Stephen Flo? Yeah. Yeah, I've been on the internet, bro. Not everyone's seen Stephen Flo. Oh, man, folks. Welcome back. It's going to be a... heck of a week. Boy, it's the longest short week of the week, huh? Of the year of the, of all time. We had some weeks here. This is, uh, what are we three weeks into the year? We are two. Just about three weeks into the new year. We are three weeks. This is the third week. Actually, technically it's the fourth. Because January 1st started on a Thursday. It's the 20th.

Club going up on a Tuesday. With Nick Fuentes in it. Nick Fuentes. And they're playing his favorite song. That's going to be in the bonus. It's going to be a great bonus. We've got so much to get to. We're going to be talking about clavicular and Sneco and Nicholas Fuentes and all of Ben's favorite guys. All my favorite guys. I have posters of them in my bedroom.

Alex, Alex Honnold's climb, we're going to make some... He was texting me going wouldn't it be so cool to be in this club right now? Oh, I thought you're going to say, wouldn't be so cool if Alex Honnold fell? No, because that wouldn't be. He's not going to... Do you think they would cut away real quick? We'll talk about it.

That's a good question. And then some Russia's got a bunch of snow, and that's kind of fun. Like dangerous amount. Like way more than you would think. It looks fake. Think about a lot of snow. It's more than that. It's more than that.

Think about too much snow. Yeah. And then double that. Maybe triple it. Hey, just as a reminder, if you go to thecreditcard list.com, which is our website, just for you, our curated list of credit cards. there's some pretty sweet cards you ought to get you cash back freaks you know you got the chase freedom unlimited thing and that's got a killer cashback thing one and a half percent on everything everybody do be asking

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check out our respective individual new shows. There will be links in the description. Links in the discreppy. But what's the name? What's the name? Last chance to see. And mine's cinema. Like cinema, but men. Because we're men. Anyway,

green... I was going to say green. Day. Green Day is back. Green Day is back. Billy Joe Armstrong and Trey Cool. Whoa, I forgot the bass player's name. Holy shit. Mike Dirt. Mike Dirt. I'm getting Derned. They're wearing so much

they're wearing so much eye black now and eye makeup they're being accused of doing blackface. So that's a big those are some shenanigans. We've got a fun one for you guys. We really do. I'm just trying to delay the inevitable.

I've, I figured it out. We, we've had this problem. The news has become a weird thing where it's, it's getting difficult to make it funny. But I got it now.

All you have to do is imagine them all naked. Pretend you're Chinese. And this all becomes very funny. Yeah. Chinese or, or North Korean or Russian or any, any. Because a lot of people are like, this isn't funny.

And it's like, it is. It actually is. pretty funny. Yeah. So yeah, in this episode, we're going to be diving into everything you need to know about Greenland and what's going on with that. And even before, like, up to the minute of us recording today, there's been all sorts of stuff coming out. Oh, it's all because Davos is going on. It's like there's a new, there's a new statement like every 15 minutes. Yeah. So we are going to try to. And we'll even do a little, we'll insert somewhere Donald Trump's. damn, dude. You know he's going to say something loopy. Hour long press conference today. Did you see any of that? The one where he's talking about like,

I could have been a baseball player. I was very good. And my mom said to me, you could be a baseball player son. And I said, thanks. He's on Joe Biden level. It's kind of crazy that we're going back to back,

watching our, the nation's leader, disintegrate into dust right before our very eyes. But his heart and his entire vascular system is just, Yeah, it just keeps chugging. It's like an old Toyota. Yeah. Or an old Volvo.

It just, no matter how many cold starts, you put that thing through, it will, it will turn and it'll, it'll kick. And fuck, goddamn, man. So, oh, and the market, the market tank today. It finally happened. Yeah, kind of. And I was very well. It finally happened. I mean, it finally wasn't priced in.

It finally made a move. Yeah. It was a bit of a, it was a bit of a, investor finally went. I don't know about all this. Yeah. There was a bit of an African-American swan that we had going. And shout out to the Trader Treehouse. Me and the crew in the treehouse been killing it.

So for the first few, this has been the best first few weeks of the year I've ever had. Oh, yes. And, yeah, today was no exception. That was nice. But yeah, man, this Greenland shit is... A lot's going to be coming out over the next few days. And I don't even know how to make a coherent, cogent prediction anymore because sometimes I'm like Trump has totally lost his mind. And then sometimes I'm like, he always wins.

So maybe there's a way that this will all work out. But then I've got this 10%. There's like a coli-ply market odds going on in my head. And it's like 10% chance that this could all end very badly. I think he's racking up short-term wins, but the long-term effects of this are going to be disastrous. I mean, as you've seen, Mark Carney and Canada has made a strategic partnership with China. That was a scathing speed. We'll get to that. Oh, I mean, it's worth it.

We're obviously not going to put it all in here, but go watch his entire speech, just talking. about the... What does he say? We're not in a transition. We're witnessing a rupture in the rules-based order, which he even admits that, like, look, they were always...

It was always a joke. It was, you know, it favored the West. We never actually held up international law. But you know what? A lot of rhetoric. The getten was good

because America opened up a lot of trade lines for us and all this stuff. But like... The bargain's not worth it anymore. And you're seeing other people talk about it. I think Macron was talking about. Markone.

Do you see the sunglasses he was wearing? What's the deal with? It might have been because the lights are bright. Okay, Mark Carney seemed fine to get in some of the lights. So maybe it was McCrone. No, no, he wasn't because then I saw him. I think he was actually Mark Carney and McCrone in some back room, like shaking hands with each other.

He had the sunglasses. Oh, wow. Maybe he just thought it was like, oh, I'm going to be cool and funny. Farted in his face in his eyes and he got pink. I was thinking hit him or something. Oh, I was thinking he farted in his face and he got pink eye. No, I know because you just said it. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But yeah, I don't know. I would like an answer. I feel like if you're going to go full aviator sunglasses, on a large world stage, you have to say, this is because my wife farted in my face and I think I. Oops, I wasn't supposed to say that part. You can't just show up. Yeah.

Well, so let's give you a quick recap of how we got here and what's going on. This last Saturday, Trump, because of this whole Greenland thing and because he's not getting his way, he announced that he's imposing 10% tariffs starting February 1st on Denmark, Finland, France, Germany, Netherlands, Norway, Sweden, and the UK, with those all increasing to 25% if the U.S. isn't allowed to purchase Greenland by June 1st. Also, they're so long, and there are so many that get attention, but I feel like we got to read just a little bit of this truth where he's announcing the tariffs because it's just shocking to see. It's just shocking to see the president. So he starts, we have subsidized Denmark and all of the countries of the European Union and others for many years by not charging them tariffs or any other forms of remuneration. Now, after centuries, it is time for Denmark to give back. World peace is at stake.

China and Russia want Greenland, and there is not a thing that Denmark can do about it. They currently have two dog sleds as protection. One added recently. The reason I always see the truth is because they end up on Twitter. And I always go, there's no way.

So I have to go to truth. Yeah. It's like, and we're going to get to the letter. The letter was the same thing. I mean, I saw it confirmed in the Atlantic and the New York. Well, I saw the... And I was like, there's no way.

That did not happen. The politician over there himself, the Norway PM, um, uh, confirmed it on his own website. But go on. Only the United States of America under President Donald J. Trump can play in this game. And very successfully at that, nobody will touch the sacred piece of land, especially since the national security of the United States and the world at large is at stake. On top of everything else, Denmark, Norway, Sweden, France, Germany, the United Kingdom,

the Netherlands, and Finland. Finland have journeyed to Greenland for purposes unknown. That's why he's doing it, because those are the countries that have sent troops to Greenland in a recent buildup after Trump has pushed all these tests, which is the right move.

Mark Carney himself also said, if Trump wants to play this game, we're NATO allies. That's what we're supposed to do if there's aggression. They're playing a various game, dangerous game. They put a level of risk in play that is not tenable or sustainable. Therefore, it's imperative that in order to protect global peace and security, strong measures must be taken. It goes on for so long. This guy is just so nuts.

I love that dog sled line, though. I know, me too. He said it in press conferences as well. So then on Sunday, the European Union had this emergency meeting, and Macron suggested what you guys will probably already be reading about and hearing about. It's technically called the anti-coercion instrument. But the trade bazook It's known as the trade bazooka. You don't hear about bazookas anymore, man. You really don't. The bazooka used to be an integral weapon

in make-believe, an army guy. Oh, when someone pulled out a bazooka, it was like well, shit, I didn't know. Is that even a viable? What would you even call that? A shoulder-mounted rocket launcher? Like, a rocket launcher has taken the place of bazooka. Hey, everybody.

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slash bays. Policies issued by Western Southern Life Assurance Company, not available in certain States, prices subject to underwriting and health questions. But anyway, this trade bazooka is essentially it would be a whole catch-all. It's blocking United States access to EU markets, export controls, company licenses, U.S. tax. They would tax U.S. services. There's, you know, getting companies all kinds of jammed up in regulations. Yeah, crypto agriculture, all that stuff. And basically, they just get to inflict economic pain. Well, not all. only that, but the European Union holds the most United States assets anywhere in the world. Which they're now talking about, I believe.

Liquidating. It was Denmark is already talking about liquidating there. Yeah, that's a small fund. It's like a pensioner's kind of fund. And I believe it was $100 billion worth of treasuries. Yeah. It's, I mean, it sounds, it is a lot, but it's a drop in the bucket considering the size of the U.S. Treasury's market. But the EU has eight trillion dollars worth of bonds and equities that they could start to, you know, if they dump those bonds, those bonds. I think that's just signaling like, hey, we're serious about this. Yes, exactly. They're also considering about $108 billion dollars worth of retaliatory tariffs that

were previously delayed since last July's tentative agreement that we came to with them. Oh, and by the way, this trade bazooka was originally designed for China, not for allies. Yeah, because that's the fucking weirdest thing. We're doing this to our allies. The whole thing doesn't make any sense. It doesn't make any sense. I mean, we're going to get to that, but I mean, we were trying to figure

out, we're like, okay, realistically, why do we even want that? We have everything we want. Yeah. That's what's so strange. We've done America, whether or not you like it or not. We won. And set up the world in a way where we basically

dominated the world. All of these things he's, all these things Trump is complaining about, NATO, the UN, where we basically have veto power over everything, except for maybe a few minor things. This is us controlling the world. You, like, you want access to Greenland? You have it. We have military bases there, military installations. I imagine if you just told Greenland, hey, we need to, uh, station some people there. It'd be like, okay, sure, whatever. Can we add a couple dog sleds to the group? The dogs like to play with the soldiers. But like all of these things, I mean, it just doesn't make any sense.

The IMF, the World Bank, all of these things we created. I think that partly to blame is Stephen Miller. I think that he's the little goblin whispering in Trump's ear. And now that Stephen Miller legitimately has a lot more power and influence, his fantasies that he's probably had since he was a high schooler about what he would do if he were the president of the fucking world is coming to fruition.

It's all coming to fruition. Where he's like, no, we can do whatever we want. We're America, God damn it, and we're no longer respected in the world. And now he's having his way. I wish someone would... Imagine just one bazooka for that guy?

God, dude. Can you imagine putting a bazook straight to the back of that dome? Stephen Miller, you are sentenced to death by bazooka. Yeah, dude. Robocop shoots his dick off. I am Robocop. You are under arrest. And he's trying to let me see a citizen. Let me see your license. And he's like, oh, shit. I'm Stephen Miller. I'm part of the government. And it doesn't compute because he's too nervous. Robocop just blasts his dick off. Robocop feared for his life. Dude. And he is full immunity.

Yeah. Yeah. That would be the sweet irony is we've got this robocop. He's going to execute. He's execute every criminal and he's got full immunity. And then, yeah, late one night, he finds himself at the wrong place at the wrong time and gets his dick blown off. Sorry, Stephen Miller. So then Sunday, further later Sunday, the Norway Prime Minister Jonas Garstor sent a message to Trump to talk global security. And the message was signed Alex and Jonas. Alex is the Finnish president. Shout out to him because I am Finnish. and Trump

Yeah, I got some finish in me I also got some beginning too and some middle and doubling down Trump responded less than 30 minutes later and let's read Trump's response first

Wait, do we have his Do we have his Who, Jonas? Yeah, do we have his message? It's fine if not, it's just Well, I have his response after this It was basically a plea to like, hey, let's work things out. It's very funny with the...

It's okay. Here, yeah, go back to this. So this was Trump's... And by the way, these are like... I believe some of these... Because Trump ended up posting actual screenshots of text messages. Yeah, from all kinds of leaders. Which is such a...

Mark Gut, the... I'm saying all these names wrong. I don't care. The head of NATO, I believe. Yeah. Yeah. Just, just posted them straight on me. He's just acting like a fucking teenager in 2013. But it does not make...

Look at what they said. Just... It does not make them... I mean, the appeasement that is going on. Yeah. Well, so Trump responded, Dear Jonas, considering your country decided not to give me

the Nobel Peace Prize for having stopped eight plus wars, eight wars plus, I no longer feel an obligation to think purely of peace, although it will always be predominant but can now think about what is good and proper for the United States of America. Denmark cannot protect that land from Russia or China. And why do they have a right of ownership anyway? There are no written documents. It's only that a boat landed there hundreds of years

ago, but we had boats landing there also. I have done more for NATO than any other person since its founding, and now NATO should do something for the United States. The world is not secure unless we have complete and total control of Greenland. Thank you, President DJT. And then everybody was like, what the fuck is this? And then sure enough... Yeah, this one took me so long. I was...

Jonas confirmed it. I just could not believe it. I know. And there was so many MAGA people who, when it was first being put on Twitter, were going, wow, you guys will really fucking believe anything. And then truly, it's like an hour later, it's verified all across the board. and the same people are just going, I stand by this. This is exactly what we want out of elite.

Oh, they're fucking spineless, dude. I was checking in, as I do, I was channel checking some of the biggest conservative right-wing influencers to see what they're saying about this. And they're not talking about it at all. They are, their directive you can tell is just to keep the focus on illegal immigration and keep the focus on the crazy leftists who are, who are, you know, fucking blowing whistles at ice agents and shit. But anyway, Prime Minister Jonas Garstor said, I can confirm that this text message that I received yesterday after, I can confirm that this is a text message that I received yesterday afternoon from Trump.

It came in response to a message that I sent earlier. In our message, we conveyed our opposition to his announced tariff increases against Norway, Finland, and select other countries. We pointed to the need to de-escalate and proposed a telephone conversation between all of us the same day. The response from Trump came shortly after the message was sent, and then he reiterated, Norway's position on Greenland is clear.

Greenland is part of the Kingdom of Denmark, and Norway fully supports the Kingdom of Denmark on this matter. We also support that NATO, in a responsible way, is taking steps to strengthen security and stability in the Arctic. As regards the Nobel Peace Prize, I have clearly explained, including to President Trump, what is well known. The prize is awarded by an independent Nobel committee

and not the Norwegian government, said the prime minister. What a fucking schmuck-ass joke this man is. Well, you didn't give me to be peace-wise, which is bullshit, by the way, and I didn't even want it, but the fact that you didn't give it to me, I'm pissed at you. I'm saying to you that it feels like in Trump won, there was so much hysteria and it felt like Rachel Maddow would say these things where you go, okay, come on. He probably didn't do that.

But Trump, too, is him basically just admitting to these... Everything. Yeah. Just being like... No, I'm fully... I want Greenland because you guys didn't give it to me. I'm not going to negotiate because you guys did not give it to me. You didn't give me the Peace Prize. And then in the most... Because, you know, these guys' whole thing has been... Oh, snowflakes and participation trophies and shit.

And in perhaps the biggest... You know why, though? It's because Obama got one. of course he's never getting over the black one got one so I'm gonna need one to cancel his out

he's never getting over Obama no he really isn't god damn dude hey guys we gotta take a quick break to talk about factor we're talking to you we're talking to everyone who said in the new year I'm finally doing it I'm eating healthy I'm eating right

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for new factor customers with code and qualifying auto renewing subscription purchase. Make healthier eating easy with factor. So he needs to get his. Didn't, didn't Machado already give him Machado? Oh yeah, she did. That's what I was getting at. You have it. The biggest, um, participation trophy, uh, stunt in all of mankind was her being like, here it is. Here I'm giving it to you as if it has any. It'd be like me, not even being in a jiu-jitsu. championship and being like man I should have or getting knocked out in like the 10th round

or the early round and me being a big I'm a rich boy and I'm like man if they don't give that prize to me because I deserve it I'm going to fucking cut funding with this whole Jiu Jitsu fucking contest and then the winner is some guy who got it and

deserved it or whatever and then it's like okay I'm going to give it to you rich boy. It'd be more like if you you kidnapped one of the other participants who had also gone out early for some reason. And you're like, it's because you guys didn't give this to me. And then you grabbed another guy. And years ago

they gave it to a black guy. And you're like, that fucking pisses me off. Black guys getting Peace Awards? So then I... Which to be fair, Obama did not deserve it. He got it like very soon into his...

Oh yeah. Whatever. Who gives a rat fuck, dude? I don't care about the Nobel Peace Prize, dude. Shut up about that Peace Prize. It should be, we got to change it for the times. Make it the most, I don't know. What's the word that kids use nowadays?

Dank. Dang. Yeah, what's the coolest word? Are you describing a basement? The chill. The chill award. Help me, help me. Come on.

Something cool? What's something that, yeah, like clavicular would use to describe the Baste Award. Oh, sure. That's what Trump should want. We should just create a new thing called the Baste. awards and it'll be the first annual one and for the first five years we just already automatically trump you've won the first five based awards can you believe it sir and he'd be like wow i can what you know it's the first i'm hearing about it it's an honor to be based and that reminds me a baseball

they said i could have been they said i could have been as good as babe ruth it's a good candy bar they said i could have been as good as babe ruth yeah but not Hank Aaron because he was a black one So backing up a wee bit, last week we had some Danish foreign, man, now I want a Danish. I'm not going to say no. What's in that? Cheese and, like, it's like a little strudal, right? A little fruity strudel. I guess.

I haven't done that in a while. Yeah, cheese Danish, yeah. So these foreign ministers met at the White House, and one of them, Vivian Motsfeldt said Greenland does not want to be owned by, governed by, or part of the United States. We choose the Greenland we know today as part of the kingdom of Denmark. By the way, did you see that Greenland was the biggest protest in their entire history? There's thousands of people, which is crazy. There's 50,000, 57,000 people live there.

Right. So, I mean, if you get 5,000 people out, you've somehow gotten 10% of the population out there. 80s, 85% of these residents reject the idea of, being bought. I also didn't know this. They're the world's largest island. Yeah. How does that work? They just have the large landmass. What about Australia? It's larger that. That fucks with my head. I thought that Denmark was smaller. You just have an Arcader projection. Australia-centric worldview because you're a Wallaweeb. You vastly overestimate Australia's impact on the world. You know how if you have just like a sphere,

I'm familiar with spheres Did you say you are or aren't? Yeah, yeah. Let's say you've got just an orb, if you will. I've got an orb. You do? I got it in Mexico and it keeps spirits out of my house. Yeah?

Yeah. That's pretty cool, man. It is cool. There's no real top, bottom side. Anything, depending on your point of reference, can be the top or the side or whatever. Sure, flip the map upside down. See what I care. It's still the globe.

that that messes me up when I think about Australia or like the Arctic because when I think about the United States I'm like oh yeah we're right in the middle right in the middle of the fucking globe because there it is on the Mercator projection

on the map and when you see the way that globes are oriented in classrooms etc it's right there in the middleish and on the bottom is Australia but it's just a globe baby you could you want Australia on the up. Not even that, but I wonder how Australians think of it. Are they like, no, we're in the center and like their perspective of the United's. Because like my... I have to imagine as, that they probably identify with the West and I'm sure they are also like, well, down here. I don't know. I don't want to speak for Australians, but you know, they're referred to as the antipities, you know? And the down under.

Yeah, I think they probably have a sense that we're pretty far away from our, we're pretty far away from our, we're pretty far away from our, allies, our center of cultural reference and that kind of thing. Because the rest of their hemisphere and all of that is like... Asian. Yeah. It's quite different from what Australia is. Yeah, it's true. Because it's a bunch of, you know, it's a colonized land. Those are not...

So I guess it's bigger. But so, because like when people have been talking about the Arctic circle in Greenland and stuff. They've been showing maps with it front and center. And it's like, okay, I have no, it fucks me up. I'm like, okay, so whoa, there's America. Like, over there, it's not like down. Anyway, I just had a... Just a brief detour of maps. And understanding.

Also, I did not know this, that they've been under control of Denmark for 300 years. and so this is what's frustrating and in all of my reading about this there are many different ways that this can be resolved in such that

Trump can kind of get appeased and get what he wants like first and foremost we have agreements that were set in 1951 with Greenland whereby we can increase troops and presence

and our presence there I don't understand I don't understand what he's after. So he's like, oh, it's a security thing. Well, then fucking beef it up, dude. It's been, I'm going through the same thing I went through with Venezuela, where I'm like, okay, it's the strategic position. And then I'm like, ah, I don't know if this is all about defense, this feels silly.

And then it's like, no, it's about the resources. And I'm like, sure, they have a lot of, you know, they have critical metals. There might be oil and, um, and I guess with global warming, it's going to be easy. to get at those, but at that point, we're going to have bigger fish to fry. Like, I have, it's just all, it's not going to be easy to extract those resources. I know there's obviously a couple of companies, like I think Critical Metals is one of those companies that's talking about how, oh, we have this big Greenland project coming down the pike. But yeah, none of it.

And to be fair, China and Russia have invested something like $15 billion to to develop and figure out what trade routes and shit would look like when and if the Arctic kind of opens up a bit. Which is also funny because part of their whole thing is denying that climate change

is even happening. So it's like, okay, so you admit that things are changing in such a way. Well, I think it's more of a denial that we are speeding it up. I think it's more like, we don't really have to act because, sure, it's happening, but let's just keep the free market going, baby, and open up some trade routes. There's nothing we can do on that front. Because it is strategically

in such a place where I guess it's like a middle spot between all of us where it would increase our visibility to potential threats a lot sooner. So still, just fucking work with them. Northeast

Coast Canada with more than two thirds of its territory lying within the Arctic Circle, which has made it crucial to the defense of North America since the Second World War. When the U.S. occupied Greenland to ensure didn't fall into the hands of Nazi Germany and to protect crucial North Atlantic shipping lanes. And then after the Cold War,

it was largely just an area of international cooperation. But now... And we had 17 military bases during that Cold War, and now we just have one. They're talking about, yes, these Northwest passages for international trade. And, you know, competition between Russia and China. So according to the...

I believe it was the Wall Street Journal, they were saying that we could also have what's called a compact of free association, similar to what we have with the Marshall Islands, Micronesia, and Palau, which is financial assistance in exchange for security presence. Does sound familiar? It's like we're already kind of offering that, except they want to buy it outright. So just give them fuck. Denmark gives them, they subsidize them by about a billion dollars a year, I think.

So tack that on and get your security presence and respect their, their, sovereign to you or whatever. And it's not like, I also want to be clear, China and Russia have made their own, they are interested in this Arctic. In 2018, China called themselves a

near Arctic state and are talking about how they want more influence in the region and how they're announcing plans for the polar Silk Road. There's new fish that we've got to, there's new fish species we've got to wipe out. Going to be part of their global belt and road initiative. Yeah, belt and road.

And Putin has also come out, he's worried, you know, he's been worried about NATO. You know, that's what the whole Ukraine thing is. Yeah. And that's what Trump's saying. And after this meeting, he reiterated his position saying that he's worried China or Russia would just occupy them. So then fucking show up and back them up. They're a NATO member. Honestly.

If you're that worried about it happening, it's not like a U.S. presence there is going to be just that much. Well, I guess it would be that much more of a deterrent. But we would have plenty of lead time if they tried to put boots on the ground in Denmark. Or in, excuse me, in Greenland. And then we'd show up and we'd fucking put rocket boosters and machine guns on the three dogs led. Maybe some bazookas just for old times. Fricin lasers on the helmets of the dogs. Blast in them.

We should get the thing, the alien from the movie and breed it. Like the Kurt Russell thing? Yeah, and because it starts out of the dogs. as a dog, the sled dog? Oh, sure, sure, sure. Yeah, can you... Imagine that. Imagine the Chinese

trying to fight that thing. And they're coming at you in a helicopter trying to shoot the dog, and you're like, damn, they really fucking hate that dog. And they're yelling in Chinese, you can't understand them. That's the beginning of the movie,

The Thing, Folks. Well, this is the new movie that we just made. Yeah, the thing, too. The thing, too. It's Chinese now. Yeah. And then Danish minister, Lars Lacharasmussen, said after this meeting,

we didn't manage to change the American position. No surprise. It's clear that the president has this wish of conquering Greenland, and we made it very, very clear that this is not in the interest of either Denmark or Greenland. He added that the United States, Denmark and Greenland would establish a high-level working group to meet in the coming weeks but declined to give more specifics. And then, as you can imagine, this was probably a very stressful, tense meeting. There's a great photo of these Danish ministers having... Oh, there's video of it. It's beautiful. It's... Smoking. I mean, I don't think a cigarette's ever hit harder than post-Vance Rubio meeting. Look at this guy. You know those things are Danish. You just had the worst meeting of your life. Can you believe this fucking shit?

Jesus Christ, they really might invade. God, that cigarette probably hit so hard. These poor guys, dude. What a shitty thing you got to deal with this. fucking loony, lune psychopath of a... I believe that's the leader of Greenland.

I've seen some videos of her getting emotional over what's going on. By the way, their entire economy is like 80% based on shrimp. It's just all fish.

Fish all the way down. They want some fish, but breakfast? Okay. Okay, guess what's for lunch? Is it fish again? Fish. Yes, yes.

You know what's for dinner? Is it fish, but... Shrimp. Some kind of... It's cold, it's cold cured. No, it's a little, it's just shrimp. And then we smoke cigarettes. And then, yeah, let's get to some of these reactions.

First of all, there's been a lot of troops deployed to Greenland. Last week, there were Danish, the Danish and Greenlandic governments and NATO allies increased military presence and exercise activity in the Arctic and North Atlantic. So that's concerning, I guess. if I were them, yeah, I'd be so scared because we could kick their asses if we wanted to. We could beat everybody. Yeah, obviously, I don't think we said it yet,

but I'm sure by the time people are seeing this, they're familiar with the image Donald Trump truth or posted wherever. Oh, yeah. It's North America and it's showing the United States, obviously, but also Canada. And also a lot of people, I don't think they caught Venezuela is also considered a part of...

Oh, and Greenland. If you go back to the dock, just above why we want it, that very last thing, trump truiting this map bullshit. Just the most trolley shit. Look at this. This AI thing of him sitting next to a map

where, yeah, it's all of Canada, all of Greenland, and yeah, down there is... You can see Venezuela down there, you can see Greenland, yeah. Jesus, dude. This is their dream. I mean, he's laid off it, but the beginning of his first term was, the big news was him talking about how he's desperate to make Canada the 51st state.

Yeah. What a fucking cock sucker, dude. I just. All right. So let's play this, Canada's new prime minister, Mark Carney, talking about this whole situation. The future of Greenland is a decision for Greenland and for the kingdom of Denmark. We are NATO partners with Denmark, and so our full partnership stands, our obligations on Article 5, Article 2 of NATO stand, and we stand full or square behind those. Not great.

Yeah, and he went on, he was talking also. Do we have that? Here, I have some of his speech from Davos. I'll send it in the chat. I think we should play a little bit of this. honestly I urge people to go watch the whole thing it's it's just wild this is forever our

closest ally yeah check this shit well because they yeah Canada just signed a massive trade deal with with China they're going to be allowing Chinese electric vehicles no longer have 100% tariffs

they've lowered it down to 6.1% which is a massive reduction and they're going to be bringing in a huge move by Canada yeah they're going to be bringing in Chinese EVs to Canada. They're basically going, hey, hey, this one mass of the biggest

world power is bullying us. And China's like, hey, we'll, don't let them walk all over. You'll partner with us. We'll treat you, right? And now... And that's... It's kind of where, what it's looking like we could be headed toward. The electric vehicle,

the electric vehicle thing really made the headlines, but it was part of a larger partnership of, there's all kinds of energy and infrastructure agreements and... and partnerships. So let's see what Mark Carney has to say at Davos. We knew the story of the international rules-based order was partially false. That the strongest would exempt themselves when convenient.

That trade rules were enforced asymmetrically. And we knew that international law applied with varying rigor, depending on the identity of the accused or the victim. Pause it real quick. It's just kind of... crazy to just come out and say that. Oh, yeah. At this event.

Yeah, keep going. It was useful. An American hegemony in particular help provide public goods, open sea lanes, a stable financial system, collective security, and support for frameworks for resolving disputes. So we placed the sign in the window.

We participated in the rituals. And we largely avoided calling out the gaps between rhetoric and reality. This bargain no longer works. Let me be direct. We are in the midst of a rupture, not a transition. Over the past two decades, a series of crises in finance, health, energy, and geopolitics have laid bare the risks of extreme global integration. But more recently, great powers have begun using economic integration as weapons. Tariffs is leverage. Financial infrastructure is coercion. Supply chain.

as vulnerabilities to be exploited. You cannot live within the lie of mutual benefit through integration when integration becomes the source of your subordination. That was... Yeah, he's been by far the most forceful leader. Yeah, man. Macron came out, but this is by far the most forceful. The world is sick of it.

And I'm, you know, I've been mocking a lot of people on Twitter. Not only the ways the world's thinking, it's very dangerous. Yeah. What we're dealing with. I mean, that fucking line that is so pervasive of like, well, I want my government run like a business is just, we got it. You know, we're, everyone's wondering what's happened. No, it's Trump thinking that this, the government does not operate like a business on purpose. And Trump thinks he can do what he did with Trump International and do all these ridiculous deals and try to bully people into stuff.

And if it doesn't work out, you just go bankrupt and try again and restructure stuff. And he has no idea what he's playing with. That's what I'm saying is even if he's running it like a business, this is bad. But you're going to lose fucking precious customers who ain't coming back, man. I think more than that. I mean, I was going, hey, buddy, you just lost yourself a customer. I think he's going to get himself in a very serious situation. where with some kind of brink,

I mean, we're talking about nuclear powers here. It's terrifying. This is not some, a casino deal gone bad. No. We're talking about eight allies stationing a bunch of troops because they don't trust us.

On our allied territory and then our closest ally that shares a border with us being like, yeah, I don't know. I guess we got to start preparing war games because we don't know what the fuck's going on.

Yeah. It's unbelievable. And it's kind of because we're in this age of something is happening all the, and I know I say nothing ever happens, that's aside from what I'm about to say, which is that we're so inundated with shit all the time. It's unprecedented every fucking day. It loses, you lose the gravity of these things that are happening. And what you just said is so historic. And it's, but it's, It's hard because it feels just a, it feels just like a fart in the wind. I know. It feels like, because there's 10 things going on at fucking winds. By the time this comes out, things could either be way worse or this all just dissipates.

And Trump goes, I'm joking. I've got to, my attention is, because last week it was Iran. Last week we recorded. Yeah, remember Iran? In Venezuela? Venezuela. So I don't know, you know, maybe the jokes on me for thinking that this is historic and we're fucking ourselves up. Well, then there's also something to be said for the algorithms.

There's a guy, I forgot his username, but I've been following. But this is very real. Yeah, no, of course. No, I mean, I'm like convincing myself. I'm like, this is happening. This is. It is also just wild. This guy is starting a spreadsheet for the year.

And every single day, he's putting the main topic in like the secondary topics. And the main topics were like ice, ice, ice, then Venezuela, Venezuela, Iran, Iran. And now it's been, you know, Greenland, Greenland. And it's like, God, I wonder what other things are going to be the main topics the rest of the year. And it just speaks to, you know, my distrust in Elon Musk and his ability to put his finger on the tip to scale. And I also think it's just... It's what we've been programmed for. It's going to happen when it happens.

And there's going to be all these little things until the thing actually happens. It's just... And it's just... It's also, this is just such bad strategy because if our whole thing is under this guise of security, we are undermining ourselves and we are making ourselves more...

No, not at all. It's extremely weak. We're isolating ourselves. It strengthens our enemies. Everything we've... That was the joke of like, if you don't think this is funny, just try to picture yourself as someone

who is not American-centric. I did appreciate just speaking of Davos real thing. Living, walking, who's going to go to fucking hell probably. Larry Fink, the multi-billionaire, I think it's Black Rock or Blackstone that he's in charge of.

No one can keep track of him. Nobody can keep track. Nobody knows the difference. But he... Blackwater's the mercenary one. Who knows the other ones? Black guy was the president. He was saying at Davos,

He kind of did a little finger wagon was like, you people are out of touch and you're dictating things to the rest of the population, none of whom are here or have any say in what we are doing. And I don't know what his ultimate point was, but it was like, all right, that's kind of... Just a minor live... I'm sure none of them were paying attention. Just a minor live update from the New York Times one minute ago. President says, you'll find out how far I'll go to get Greenland. Oh, cool.

Awesome. Meanwhile, today, our lovely Secretary of the Treasury, Scott Best, is he the Secretary of the Treasury? Yes. He, yes. He was urging everybody not to panic because that's his job, is to go out and go. The president says, you better not get pissed off about this. This is actually not a big deal. So let's go ahead and play it.

Again, I would say this is the same kind of hysteria that we heard on April 2nd. There was a panic. And what I am urging everyone here to do is sit back, take a deep breath, and let things play out. As I said on April 2nd, the worst thing countries can do is escalate against the United States. Back then, only one country, China escalated. We ended up in an unfortunate tit for tat in tariff raises. We ended up at 145, 125, 125 through President Trump's good relations with party. chair she we have managed to stabilize that relationship there and given great certainty and the as far as your

question about the additional tariffs what president trump is threatening on green one is very different than the other trade deals so i would urge all countries to stick with their trade deals we have agreed on them and it does provide great certainty so you're saying to see stick with our current trade deals, but this is just a new thing that he's going to toss on top of that, that surely not going to fuck up those existing trade deals. Got it. Also telling everyone else to not escalate while you just continually escalate. Oh, I know. It's the most gas-lighting.

I just getting on TV and saying, do not escalate, go fuck yourself. It's just such a cop thing, you know. Fucking. Don't. Don't know what you're going to be freak out. It's like, okay, I'm just going to reach for him. wallet like you ask me too. Jesus Christ.

Do not escalate. Okay, we're pointing a fucking gun at your head, but do not fucking escalate. And now because they're so obsessed with every tick in the market, Scott Bessent was also saying, actually, all of this market action today is due to Japan's bonds and the way that they're moving and has nothing to do with Greenland. Yeah, that's it. Oh, yeah, sure, buddy. We're all worried about Japan.

You speak for the entire market, you absolute fucking income poop. Yeah, that's it. I'm watching the news and I'm going, Japan's bonds? Japan's bonds are freaking out. That's what I'm worried about. And remember, part of the whole reason that Trump was freaking out on Jerome Powell last year was because bond interest rates were climbing as bonds were dropping, because they move inversely to each other.

And guess what's happening now? The bonds yields are going up. And suddenly that's not an issue anymore since we've got to do our fucking debt crap. I just hate this man. It is a good time to point out. We will, Trump will be speaking tomorrow for us yesterday for you. And I'm sure he'll say something very, maybe we'll just leave a little space here for us to throw it in later. I know that they'd be there for us. They're not there for us on Iceland. That I can tell you. I mean, our stock market took the first dip yesterday because of Iceland. So Iceland's already cost us a lot of money. But that dip

is peanuts compared to what it's gone up. And then after the war, which we won, we won it big. Without us, right now you'd all be speaking German and a little Japanese, perhaps. So we want a piece of ice for world protection, and they won't give it. We've never asked for anything else, and we could have kept that piece of land, and we didn't. So they have a choice. You can say yes. and we will be very appreciative,

or you can say no, and we will remember. And that was Trump's speech at Davos. How did you guys like that? Oh, yeah, yeah. It's really good. Gee, I wonder if it's going to be long and rambling and... I think it's really going to...

I think it's going to ease the tension. I think people are going to feel good about... How do you even go off of what he says when then he goes in truth's shit that can be very contradicting to what he just said. Like these, the map, the map thing with the United States flag on the map

is not the only thing that he trothed either. There's another one that's AI of him planting a flag in Greenland. Do you see that one? Yep. And it says Greenland, a property of the United States. God, damn, dude. It's all just a little thing for him to win,

though. You know what I mean? He's got his sight set on it and he just wants to feel like he's won. I'd, maybe that is, maybe there is some deal they work out where, I don't know, Trump gets to feel like he's won. It's all these things. He seems to like not want to get bogged down in a bigger thing. The 12-day war with Iran or whatever. It's like, he's very reticent to go full bore. So I don't know.

He could end up doing it again where all of a sudden he's just like, swirves at the last second. I don't know. I'm just so sick of the spineless fucking partisan hacks that are part of the GOP and the Democrats. Dude, at this point, it's international, man. It's like everyone needs to step up. Can someone poison him? Honestly. Like, I know he likes McDonald's, so he's because it's, you know, nobody's going to poison.

him, but at this point, there wouldn't even be an investigation. The guy is, you know, what's his preferred meal at McDonald's? Like a Big Mac, a filial fish, a chicken sandwich and like washing a fucking rice in there. Or some, I don't, God damn, man. We'd all just agree to say natural causes. Yeah, good God almighty. His head blows up. It just, like you like to say, he just did that. So, yeah, the market reacted in a way that I was surprised by. I was spending a lot of time this weekend responding. Well, I shouldn't say I was spending a lot of time doing this, but I responded to quite a few people on Twitter over the last week who were trying to be all doom and gloom, and I was being, nothing ever happens, which I still kind of stand by,

because we do digest things a lot quicker than ever before. And if this starts to kind of, you know, over the weekend, when this kind of all washes away, what's that? the next thing going to be? And when everybody kind of forgets about this, what's the next thing going to be? But the market did drop precipitously today. How much? About 2%.

I think about 2%. Yeah, let's see. Spy. 2.04%. Yep. But you think when it's all said and done, that'll end up being a minor blip? It could be. I mean, it was a big gap down, which is not a good sign.

and it, yeah, but there were a lot of names, a lot of the, what you wouldn't want to see is a lot of the market leaders dropping too, but you didn't see much of that. Intel was up. A lot of shit that I have was up today,

which was a nice feeling. Netflix reported earnings today after hours and they're down like 4%. But who gives a rat fuck? It's Netflix. They're going to own the whole industry soon enough. Yeah. I think they're about to up their cash offer

or two. In fact, let me see. Netflix after hours. Oh, yeah, it's still down 4%. But yeah, just transitioning a little bit here to the markets. Man, oh man, there's the Chinese EVs is a big deal being in Canada. I'm curious if we're going to see more of these partnerships in the coming days, especially. as this rhetoric ramps up from Trump, I don't know why you wouldn't. There's been a lot of, there's been a lot of rejection of Chinese investment.

Even to the detriment of European, they were so loyal to Americans. I believe it was for some kind of like internet infrastructure. The Chinese were going to come in with a much better deal. And they were like, no, we'll take this slower, more expensive deal because we can't link with China. And I think people are going to start going, well, why the fuck would I be loyal in this moment?

Yeah, no kidding. And especially when anything is bound to happen. You can't build factories. Not only financially. I mean, your own security, your own national security. Yeah. He likes to make these threats and posture. And then when these governments and entities react,

he then uses their reaction to justify the threats. And it's just this oeroboros of... Well, you're not supposed to escalate. Yeah, when you see... Yeah, you're right. Escalate, okay? So we act. You say, thank you, sir.

Trump is... I mean, it kind of is the emperor wears no clothes. And Trump's walking around with no bottoms on. And people are going, whoa, look at his dick. And he's going, hey, don't you fucking look at my penis? don't look at it how dare you i'm just walking around like every other man and they're going no your your dick is out your dick balls and ass are out and it's disgusting that is offensive to me stop saying that my dick and balls and ass are out this is a bad example and then he goes to truth

and is like i'm being treated very unfairly as you can see i'm wearing clothes and it's just his shirt you you only see him from the waist up they're saying they can see my dick balls and ass but it's not true and then Ted Cruz is like, I think he's got a very great set of dick balls and ass. I don't know why they're complaining. I would love, some people would pay money to see the president's seat balls in ass. God, can you imagine how stinky, stinky Trump's dick balls and ass are? Why?

I don't know. I'm just thinking about it for a second. Why are you thinking about him? I don't know. I was just imagining. How often do you think about him? I never do. But, you know, after a long day, you take off your clothes to take a shower and you're like,

man, I can just feel how stinky my shit is. Damn, you imagine Mr. Diaperoonie? Have you seen the presidential toilet when he travels? No. Does it have a bidet? No. It is a special toilet that has no water in it. It's just like a foil.

Google Trump's or Google President Travel Toil. It's just a, no. That's insane that that that. Comes up when you Google that. Because they don't want anybody stealing the president's crap. What are you talking about? So that they might learn something about his genome so that they could manufacture, you know, a deadly poison or something like that. So it's this...

I'm going to start being very cautious about people getting my poop. Oh, you got to be, dude. Well, what if he's got to take a crap? He's visiting some elementary school. They're like, sir, you're like, sir, you got a shit in this special travel bucket toilet. where's the damn video of it? You watched a TikTok and got bad info, I think. All right, go on.

Oh, man. Presidential Travel Toilet, foil, I don't know. But it's like you drop shit in there. And when you press flush, it just kind of twists. And say, oh, I think that, nope. Jesus Christ. I swear to God, it's real. You have to believe me.

I don't believe you. Believe me. You got to believe you. Yeah. I mean, maybe it's not true, but I believe it. Anyway, so what do you think is going to happen? I don't know. This might de-escalate, but I think... I think they'll come up with a deal.

Trump will make it seem like it was his idea. He came out on top. It's a win for the United States. It's a win for the American people. It's a win for Denmark. It's a win for fucking Greenland. and it's probably going to be that thing that the Wall Street Journal was talking about where it's this kind of packed where we pay them a little bit instead of $700 billion

now it's like we could pay them $5 billion a year. Either way I think the damage is done and possibly yeah and yeah they'll mark it as another win among his many wins but I think the damage is done

people are still going to, you know, the Trump administration has made clear that it's a lawless administration and they're just they're operating not in accordance with any norms.

It's truly the whims of this guy. He could wake up tomorrow and be like, I don't care about Greenland anymore. That's just what... I'm setting my sights on California. We're going to make them, we're going to bring them into the fold. Sir, they are already a state. Make them

fuck shit kick him out and bring them back did you see Newsom talking about the oh yeah he was he was he was telling

the European leaders to get off their knees ooh yeah I was gonna bring knee pads for these Europeans I mean hopefully it will

force the Europeans to kind of grow a spine and stand up to him it seems like Macron's trying to but I don't know I don't blame them I'd be paralyzed

with like what the fuck do we do with this yeah i mean forever they've latched themselves on to this good deal uh and you know like mark carney was talking about and i think they don't know what to do in this new in this new era at least we got whole milk the war against whole milk is over have you seen the the thing everyone saying about how they thought it was probably a it was they were really pushing for a raw milk campaign oh and they were informed that they would have had uh like a massive fallout from that

And so they just compromise. And they were like, make it a whole milk campaign. And so now everyone's like, hmm, whole milk. Milk is back with your stupid fucking almond milk and oat milk. It's not even, it's not even, they're not even against all milk. They're against low fat milk. I need like 2%, 1% whatever skim milk. Gives a flying fuck.

I hated all those milk ads back in the day. Again, it's an Obama thing. I think Obama made it so instead. The black one liked milk? No, no, I think it was instead of whole milk in schools, he did reduced fat 2% milk or something like that. Let me be clear. And he's like, whole milk is bad. We're no longer going to have these queer kids in middle school drinking 2% milk.

It must be so nice to be in Trump's inner circle and just be able to manipulate him so easily. I would say it's probably not as easy. He's such a mercurial guy. True. I imagine it's quite stressful. I know everyone says, oh, you just have to. to like stroke his ego and that's the end of it. Give him a gift.

But it's probably fucking stressful. Yeah, that's true. Like, who knows what he's going to be tweeting? Just the way he flip-flopped on, you know, he's done it with so many people. Mamdani is a perfect example. That meeting of Mendonnie going to gather. When he actually sees someone in person, he's chicken shit.

And he doesn't follow up, unless it's Zelensky. I don't think so. I think he genuinely, like, I think he can be one over. And I think he just like, same thing with, he used to be a big balsonero guy. And then Lula was talking to Trump

and was just like talking shit about Bolsonaro. And he's like, you like, you like Bolsonaro. The guy he's like always laid up in the hospital, sick with some kind of like raw meat poisoning. You're right. He sucks,

he's a loser and he stinks. He smells bad. His breath smells. Imagine being Marco Rubio and being like, well, shit, if Stephen Miller just starts talking about how,

I don't know, I'm part of some, Cuban conspiracy, I'm fucked. I saw Marco Rubio walking around with his dick balls and ass out. Everybody saw it. I mean, there are no... What an ugly penis. They're no different from the...

They're no different from the... I didn't think the leopard would eat my face there. Yeah, yeah. They're like, okay, I'm on in the inside. I'm on the inside. All of a sudden, who knows how you can be left out in the cold so easily? I'm on the outside. I'm looking in.

Lastly, just speaking to the EU, man, for a brief moment, I got really nervous because, you know, the market, the futures market opened on Sunday and was down a lot. And I saw a few tweets that were alluding to and suggesting that disclosure is imminent about the existence of aliens. And that's what's happening and what's going to happen. Because these tweets were fucking getting tons of hits. Aliens confirmed. Because if you click the Bank of England, and the headline was like, the Bank of England is preparing for disclosure by the Trump administration. Like, look, here's the article. Because they're assuming that people don't have the...

Either they themselves don't have critical thinking skills and good reading comprehension. Or they assume that others don't. But I clicked the article, and it is very recent. it was published on Friday, but the headline is Bank of England must plan for financial crisis sparked by aliens.

A former analyst at the Central Bank has urged Governor Andrew Bailey to put contingencies in place to prevent collapse if alien life is confirmed. So it's basically just these guys, you know how when you read, like, if you've ever had a contract,

you know, the lawyers be like, lawyers do be like... And if Jesus Christ comes back, we don't owe you anything. Or a warranty can be like, this doesn't cover against weather and acts of God and something, something in perpetuity throughout the universe. It's just language that just fucking in case. If a snowstorm happens in Miami and they get three feet of snow, we're fine. I always thought the act of God thing

was interesting. And I remember asking someone about it when I was like teenager because I had a warranty on a CD player and it said, oh, this doesn't cover acts of God. I'm like, what would an act of God be? And my mom was like, I don't know, a gust of wind causing it to drop. That enables the manufacturer to say, that counts as an act of God. Or the devil comes and steals your CD player. They don't say act of the devil. They should call it an act of the devil. Well, he was an angel.

That is true. What was his name? I don't remember. Lucifer. Lucifer. Lucifer. You know that song? Yeah.

It's fucking awesome, dude. And they just list the names. All his names. It's got to be so cool. That would be my intro song if I were a Major League Baseball pitcher. That would be scary as hell. Wouldn't that be fucking cool? You know what?

I don't even want to say it because we'll have, I'm sure Phil will be back on at some point. We should just have him do it. But he always had the funniest bit about if he was a UFC fighter, he would come out to to happy birthday and he would do this very good like he'd be like shadow boxes like happy birthday it was so funny

and he was doing the jumps like you know how sometimes they do the jump and play yeah yeah next time fell out I'll have him do the UFC fighter coming out to happy birthday

but just in case if you've made it this far first of all you're an absolute freak and we adore you but if you've seen those headlines about like oh the Bank of England is preparing

this is that type of shit that that Ian the guy who's good friends with Candace Owens, he's got the mustache who's like, Mr. like, check this out. I read this and you're going to want to see this. This is a type of shit that fools him. I actually don't know who that is, but...

Oh, you're so lucky. He's just a fucking moron. I'm not familiar with the Candace Owens. Ian Carroll, that's his name. Extended universe. But did you see her latest shit that she's like, Charlie Kirk might have been a time traveler kind of shit?

I saw some shit. I know. I can't, I can't even... Yeah. You know. she's so pretty and so stupid those are always a is she stupid or is she

taking advantage of everyone oh yeah I mean yeah is she stupid or is she evil I would say evil because taking advantage of money so much money which is so crazy just I know but

don't worry there aren't aliens coming imminently And it's also funny, this new Steven Spielberg movie coming out this summer. Dude, the movie looks, there's something up with that movie. It looks terrible to me. But also, people are like, they're prepping us. They're preparing us. They're like, and I'm like, brother, there have been so many fucking alien movies over the decades.

Yeah, why is this one? It's because people are stupid and they're, they're fucking, they're just so fucking dumb, man. I hate this trailer. Emily Blunt looking like But it looks so weirdly filmed It just looks something What's it called? Uncanny Valley or something Something just looks off

No, I don't play the trailer I don't want to see it I don't want to hear it So yeah, aliens aren't don't worry They're just planning They probably also have contingencies For if it starts raining Fucking

It starts raining men Now that's a contingency I'm planning for Yeah, can you imagine What a song I would love I would love cloudy with a chance of

5 foot 9 Latinos skinny twinky We also have to talk about in You saw the Robin performance on Stephen Colbert No

Okay we're going to the bonus Gay icon Robin Okay we're going to the bonus Where can they find it Ben and Amil Show.com Ben and Amel Show.com I got a show Ben the Robin

Okay I love Robin we all loved Robin I don't know what's going on with Robin but we'll be talking about it so hey anybody out there listening or watching

live in Greenland give us a shout or if you're a Danish and you live in Denmark give us a shout we'd love to hear from you yeah please give us a shout maybe we'll somehow

zoom you in or something we need some boots on the ground yeah and don't lie don't say that you aren't but you aren't okay okay love you Bye. Coming up on this week's episode of Ben and Emile show.com.

15 hours a week, manager. Now, the reason why I'm showing you all this is simple. If I can become one of the only few. It's so weird, though, because they're like... They're base instincts. You want to drive a Lambo? I only work 15 hours a week and I make a ton of money. I know.

But they're like simultaneously like, I'm a workaholic. All I do is business. And they're like, it's actually 15 hours a week. Yeah, what the fuck? They're like, yo, I actually don't hang out with women. I only work. 15 hours a week. The rest of the time, I'm having my boys take pictures with me in Miami. Yeah.

Child endangerment. You've never been in an ER? What? You've ever been in an ER? I've been in an ER. Oh, you've ever worked in ER? No. What kind of shit you see in a day?

But my neighbor who's in ER, well, she's now... Wait, does it happen on New Year's Day? Did I make that up? No, it doesn't happen on New Year's Day. Must be thinking of Los Anios Nuevos. There's a racist white guy. There's a gun control. There's a gun thing.

There's, it really is... Is it New York City? Pittsburgh. Pittsburgh. Hence the pit. That'll run the gamut. That what? That'll run the gamut.

Yeah, a lot of things happen in Pittsburgh. You'll see a lot of things in Pittsburgh. You got all kinds of guys in Pittsburgh. There's all sorts of things going on in parts of the country that we don't even think about. That's what's so crazy. I was thinking about it basically with this whole thing we were talking about in the main episode of just like, there's so many different kinds of Americans. It's so weird. We're all just like locked in this fucking country together.

What's that? What's the correct kind of American? Describe him. we all know describe him white Anglo-Saxon Christian God-fearing

straight virgin man stamp it sign it seal it deliver it from my mouth to God's to God's ears

to your butthole to your butthole to your dick hmm man dude that that's uh so what we were gonna part of what we were going to talk about speaking of that what I just did in