The Ben and Emil Show - PP 33: It's all rigged and Taylor Swift is a Psyop

Episode Date: February 1, 2024

The whole system is rigged. Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce are Democrat plants, the stock market is at all time highs and the wealthy are laughing all the way to the new Four Seasons Hotel Yacht. Plus, they're even coming after your Zyn packs. Nothing is sacred. Everything is fake. Except us. We're as real as real gets. In this week's bonus Ben is on NUT NUT mode. So go sign up! https://www.patreon.com/PayPigsPod Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hey, what's up guys? Hey, everybody. Welcome to the next iteration of the Pay Pigs podcast. We got a whole bunch of shit for you this episode. We're going to be talking about, man, oh man, we got this yacht that's a new hotel yacht. It's not a cruise ship. It's something that basically you can't afford it, right? You can.

Some of you can. Some of you can. I know something you got it like that. Some of you can, but statistically a few of you can probably afford it. Chuck Schumer is coming for your Zen pouches. because, of course, the liberals just want to take away everything that's good in the world. And then, of course, one of our headline stories is, is Taylor Swift a Democrat plant sci-op? Spoiler alert, yes.

Yeah, that's true. And it's working on me. I feel hypnotized. And if we got time, we'll probably, yeah, we'll probably get around to it. We're going to be talking about earnings, layoffs, all that good shit. maybe a little bit talk about the neurolink guy first human guy It's a guy, it's a man

I don't know I mean it's probably a guy in a wheelchair for sure Who can't use his arms or legs It's probably a quadriplegic For those of you don't know Elon Musk's neuralink company Also stick around because I found videos of the monkeys Playing video games

You did? Yeah hell yeah Oh yeah so before we get into it Get signed up at the Patreon Patreon.com paypigs pod we're going to be doing another q and a next week uh i was going to call you elon emil just dropped his latest book review yo elan just dropped it i got uh i hope we picks it up i got my latest playlist it's really long hey also i've been getting a lot of dms from you

people about is the credit card website live and i honestly can't tell if people are just messing with me at this point because they know it'll get a response which it does but the credit card site the credit card list.com is in fact live and also ask ben if it's live sure some guy tried to get a response by saying he deemed me and said hey ben you'd probably know about this that's pretty funny it was a clever move uh but you got blocked for it gang uh if if you're thinking about getting a credit card i would hold off until next week because there is uh something big is coming like legit big and it's pretty much what we made this website for so be on the lookout and yeah so wait till you see the size of this fucking thing what that's coming down the pike the this is the

four seasons yet oh no the thing you're talking about oh yeah yeah that that oh yeah that that that oh before we get started i got a disclaimer you're going to love this you ever heard of a sun choke sun choke yeah is that a fruit no it's it a vegetable yeah it's it an artichoke No, it's combined with the... I think it's part of a... I think it's part of the sunflower plant or whatever. Huh. If you guys find yourself at a fancy restaurant serving sunchokes...

Eat it? Don't eat it. Oh, it tastes like shit? No, they taste fine, but they... I googled it after. They... They fuck you up, your stomach. That's rare for me to hear from you.

I know. And that's the thing. Someone said it. I said, I said, I would anyone serve this in a fucking restaurant? And I googled it after. I just googled Sunchokes stomach and they literally called them fartichokes. Man, oh man. Be careful out there, folks.

Yeah, that pisses me off. That sounds like some fancy restaurant type shit where it's like, oh, we're serving this thing that you've never heard of, but the downside is going to give you diarrhea. Farts. It was a fancy restaurant. Yeah. And then there I am waking up at 6.30 in the morning going, what is going on? I ordered pizza last night and I wolf it down and I ended up waking up in the middle

of the night just so. you know that thirsty you wake up in the middle of the night after you've had a really salty dinner oh man i had that and then 20 minutes later i had to piss so i couldn't get back sleep anyway there's four seasons yacht man these fucking rich people just keep inventing new ways to make the rest of us feel like absolute dog shit and uh for the audio listener you're just going to have to i mean there's not much to see i thought when you said the new yacht i thought uh we were going to be talking about the icon of the seas oh that that the the um the royal caribbean the yeah the brand new cruise ship yeah this ain't a cruise ship this is a yacht i know because that thing for those

of you don't know the icon of the seas is what it's a brand new oh it's incredible it's like they got a tennis court basketball court they're entire cities they call them neighborhoods this thing so big they have they have a golf course it's it's crazy And that's the thing. Then I started looking at this. After looking at this, I'm like, I don't want to go on that thing. The Four Seasons, yeah. You had to go on the icon of the Seas, baby.

Well, on the icon of the Seas, you're sharing it with, what, like 7,000 people or something? Dude, it's a neighborhood. Whereas the Four Seasons yacht, there's only 96 suites. Dude, who cares? Also, it's very, I was looking, I was looking up more stuff about the icon of the seas, and the CNN was like, not everyone interpreted it as a delightful vision of lavish fun and relaxation at sea. It got billed as a monstrosity, a pile of decadence, and one user suggested a better name

for it would be icon of disease. Damn, yeah. It was called intricately tacky and vulgar and compared to being stuck on a floating Walmart or a barely balanced stack of full plates of food, chaotic, messy, and possibly precarious. Many juxtaposed it to visions of hell, with one commenter suggesting, oh boy. It was some kind of infernal landscape. another gave a more contemporary culture reference saying the ship looks like the candy crush version of the

dystopian underground world in silo these people sound too snooty for the icon of the season I wonder if they serve fartichokes on the icon of the sea But this is the thing, then you really get, I bet they do it. Can you imagine if they serve sun chokes? Everybody get in diarrhea all at once. But they just call it fartichokes. They're like, these people are stupid.

We've got a meal, a fit for a king. The first course is going to be fartichoke. But that's what it, That's what the whole place is literally like. Have you ever been on a cruise ship? No, never. I would never. It's an entire industry that I never think about. I never consider.

I never, it's fucking bizarre to me. In my mind, it's like if your parents weren't cruise people, you're never going to be a cruise. You know, you know, it's like, uh,

someone has to bring you on there so you can, I just would never have the idea to go on a cruise. I think of all, my grandma used to go on cruises when she was with her boyfriend. I also feel like they're like for America. who want to leave the country but don't want to see a foreigner. That's pretty good. I would do a riverboat cruise, like through Europe.

They're more quaint. Yeah, yeah. Riverboat cruises through Europe? Also advertised to old people because I hear it on the radio and it's like, hey, if you're over 65, you get a special senior citizen discount. Riverboat cruise. I don't know, fucking the do noob. Okay, so this thing, this thing has 95.

only 95 suites. Okay. Well, the icon has 20 decks. It's 20 decks high. Yeah. This thing's got, the biggest one is 9,500 square feet. It's a four-level suite. It's got a private spa, a personal waiting pool.

I mean, if you're able to afford this, why not just fucking abscond with a couple of your buddies and not, well, well, answer me this. Does it have a Thrill Island, a Category 6 water park? No, it doesn't have any of that shit. Okay. I will say, I guess part of the thing that rich people do like is... The largest water park at sea? Shut up.

It's being in the hierarchy. So it'd be like the cheapest one, the brokest of the rich, is only 500 square feet on this mega, on this yacht. But man, it would suck if some sort of tragedy were to befall this yacht, this four seasons yacht. Yeah, you know what they say? Safest place to be on the ocean, icon of the seas. really no oh i mean i i i would believe it but yeah they've got all sorts of stupid fucking a man they've got a 20 meter pool do they have a three-deck chill island no they got a beach club that's home to four of icon seven pools along with ample loungers to catch some sun or chill in the shade i'm

getting real pissed off i'm getting pissed off at the rich people for their four seasons yacht and i'm also getting pissed off at the icon of the seas you want to hang out on this thing with these people? I mean, they got the innovators here. Isidore Sharp, the founder and chairman of four seasons. I'm staying at four seasons in China. You know why? Because it's like $170 a night. You know what the first thing I'm going to do when I get there is, which is what everybody should do when they check into a hotel, putting my bags in the bathroom, and I'm checking the bed for bedbugs. Do they have a bed bug problem?

You just never know. Oh. Yeah, always check for bedbugs. Oh, yeah. Cool. Fun vibe on vacation. I, when I went to Barbados with my old roommate in New York for him to renew his visa, he was in the upstairs and I was in the downstairs like guest area and I swear to God, I checked the bed. And I am sure that there were bedbugs riddled in that thing. And he got kind of annoyed with me because I was like, hey, man, I got to sleep up here with you on the couch. And he goes, man, you got your own bedroom down there. And you're really going to do that? And I was like, dude, I'm telling you there's bed bugs. Did you see something? I saw all the, all the characteristic thing, the, like, feces, the feces on the, on the wood and stuff. And I just was like, I'm just going to sleep up here if you don't mind. He's like, I don't mind. I just think you're kind of being paranoid.

And maybe I was, but we didn't take home bed. Dude, you saw feces all over the. Yeah, but like bug feces. So it was teeny tiny. Trust me, I'm a bed bug expert. That thing had something. And I just didn't want to fuck with it. Thank you.

Dudeer stains all over it. Yeah, yeah, well, bug doodoo stains, not human doodoo stains. I've never seen them, but I've never seen that on anything that's not. Somebody should send, maybe I could buy some bedbugs online and get the cheapest thing. Get the cheapest, that would be fun. That would be a fun headline is the Four Seasons's yacht gets a bedbug infestation or like a diarrhea overflow. It'd be fun to like, you're just going to bring a bed bug on to the four seasons yacht not one several oh you're

so you're going to breed bed bugs yeah i'm freaking i'm breathing them at home and i'm bringing them yeah i did see i saw a video of these girls whoa what kind of girls were there so many of these women they were on a on a like a uh they were on like a a a pleasure cruise on like through some fucking like maybe the icon of the scenes shut the fuck up it was like it was like through the Venice Beach canals or something

and they had charcutorian stuff and the caption just said some boy emptied out a gallon of milk on them as they went underneath and I'm just saying wouldn't it be tragic if a similar tragedy

were to befall the Four Seasons's yacht but with diarrhea a gallon no you'd need more than that man you'd need way more. All right, let's move on. No, no, I feel like, can I tell you one thing about this? Tell me one more thing about the

icon of the seas. Maybe a couple things. Christ. It's got a towering pink flamingo statue. Right at right at the entrance to Surfside, the lion's first neighborhood designed for young families. Is that doing anything for you? Do you think that there's the equivalent of the TSA for cruise ships?

I hope so. Parents can kick back at Waters Edgeport. I just imagine a lot of really red German tourists and old people. Oh, it's awful. Yeah, it sounds awful. So can we move on? No, they have another deck above that. I'm sure they have so many. They've got a fucking shopping mall.

I didn't even get to tell you about aqua theater. Is that where they do like high dives and aqua performances? It's the striking new aquedome, okay? It's an enclosed steel and glass structure at the front of the ship. And it will host the Aqua Action Range of Emotion Show. Range of Emotion? High diving aerial dance. skateboarding and more okay all right now can we talk about something else there's also an escape

room on deck oh jesus i i the whole ship is a damn escape room i'm just which one would you rather go on i would rather go honestly i'd probably rather go on the icon of the seas because you know some some people are going to be getting in fights and stuff but i i just wouldn't want to be there's all sorts of fucking miserable shitty people who are probably on that thing having diarrhea. No, I think I'd actually... I'm just imagining everybody's seasick.

I think I'd probably prefer the old the four seasons one, honestly. And it's also crazy because I've seen people tweet about cruises and talk about like, oh, Royal Caribbean,

well, that one's fucking garbage. It's all about the crown... This is where a season five, they're doing season five of White Lotus on this one. No, they're not. They're doing it in Thailand.

That's season four. Oh, God. Okay. I wonder if something crazy is going to happen at that hotel. I wonder if someone's going to get murdered and we're all going to go, I bet it's that person. I bet it's that person. But then at the end,

it's going to be someone nobody thought of. No, I'm not a hater. I just, I'm fucking tired. I like it. I like the show. It's going to be good. I don't know.

I'm just tired of shit. I'm just getting pissed off lately. No, I'm just tired of it. Just a perfectly good show. All right. Everybody shut the fuck up. everybody if you're out there and you're on a cruise ship god bless you got to help you i hope you don't

get sick chuck schumer's coming for your zins if you don't know what a zin is mom it's a little uh it's smokeless tobacco all right you put it you you pack a lip it's a little it looks like the thing that you do to sniff it looks like it looks like the uh smelling salts it's like that if you don't know what a zin is what's it like being a no friend's uh virgin virgin virgin which it like to be a little gay boy because me and all my cool guys we all be packing's in i did try the three milligram one which i thought was going to be um mild and it made my heart race i hated it and then 20 minutes later i was like i got to have another i got to have one i got to get another's in so i put one in but so chuck schumer it's just boy if this ain't

politics in america distilled it's it's perfect so he's pushing the fdaa to investigate their marketing and their effects on teen health because he's convinced that Zinn is somehow behind the curtain pulling the strings marketing the shit to teenagers because as we've all seen there's a lot of memes out there about Zin's well it's also like it's like the jewel thing right

with any of these like easy nicotine things I mean the jewel was very it was like now you can you don't have to have cigarettes you can do fruity little flavors and it'll just be mango right and now these are just so so easy you'd be nicotineing all the dang time so they i believe they're owned by

philip morris and philip morris already came out and said hey we're not breaking any laws we are not marketing to teenagers which certainly may be true it's not our fault our products are dang cool and addictive and highly delicious so you know it's putting teens at risk not letting them have zen they're going to get bullied well you know who would probably prefer teens to be on zin is conservative Marjorie Taylor Green. Yeah, well, because you can guess, if you guessed that the people who are pissed off at Chuck Schumer are Marjorie Taylor Green and the Tucker Carlson's, you're exactly right. And I'm not necessarily taken aside here. It's just when I say it's exemplary of American politics is because Chuck Schumer isn't calling for like a full-on ban of Zins.

He's just saying, hey, maybe we should look into, because these are different than traditional like dip tobacco, which we know is harmful and can cause or. cancer maybe the same kind of thing could happen with these impacts we don't know yet also eating pussy so maybe stay away from that as well causes oral cancer yeah that's how we lost one of our all-time greats he died probably i thought michael douglas is still around he ate catherine dade of douglas you know my wife catherine i can't do it i can't do it it turned into jack nickle in nicholson you know my brain isn't fully operational maybe if i had a zin you know how much they fucking sold their their sales have like tripled in the last few years that if it from whatever it was 200 million something to 8008 million units sold in the u.s in 22 i also just don't know

how they did this the i think i said this last week but i just don't understand how they made smoking and nicotine cool again and it's not just nicotine like we did it single-handedly we we legitimately no we did played a tiny teeny teeny part yes because we're part of the we're part of the sphere we're part of the sphere of influence because now I got I got people in my idea I'm saying like damn you made me want a cigarette I'm not taking any part of it it's part it and then again I'm saying 0000001 percent I got addicted I got addicted to cigarettes the cool way the old fashioned way which was being 15 that's that's the only way it used to happen is you would be like a child and be like that looks cool I should do that and then you get addicted to

it and then you get in your 20s and I'm like oh I should have I stopped at like 24, 25, and then all the sudden, fully grown adults, which never used to happen. You don't, you're not like 25 and all of a sudden like, should I fucking smoke cigarettes now? No, it's because you have a light beer at a bar. You have two or three of them and you go, damn, you know what sounds good? A cigarette. And you know what? It does. It's good. That's like a social smoker. It is good. It is good. It's great. But then social smoking turns into the next morning, you're having a coffee and you're like, you name, you know what is good, go, go, good with this cigarette.

And then you shit yourself. Oh, man, yeah. Well, but now everyone I know is like, yeah, I don't know. I fucking, I smoke. You know who I bet is actually a much bigger slice of that pie are our friends over at Friday beers. They are, I would classify them as these quote unquote zinfluens who, because does this not sound like them?

I'm not pointing any fingers. They have helped with comedy sketches and memes. Interesting. And, yeah, Chuck Schumer is concerned that they could pull vulnerable teens into a nicotine habit. Marjorie Taylor Green called for a zinsurrection to protect the brand because, of course, they're only political, they're only guided by reflect, reflexivity. Just like, oh, you're saying that?

Well, okay, guess what? God forbid you have any kind of meaningful policy or anything to do. You've got to concern yourself with fucking pushing back on the other guy. And the RNC chair, Richard Hudson, posted a pic online picture with. his pack his impact and he said big brother schumer doesn't want us to chew or smoke now he's against an alternative that's helped many quit come and take it oh it's always come and take it i'll come and take it i'll come i'll come i'll come take it also i want to be clear i advocated for one thing and one thing only smoking a cigarette when you're outside of america it rocked it feels healthy

yeah you know how they they they talk about oh you can have donuts and eat like shit in other countries and for some reason it doesn't put on weight because everything's healthy over there you don't get you can't get lung cancer if you're uh in europe or something the same thing is true also i would like to apologize for the squeakiness of this chair if you hear it right now it's uh it's actually all in your head and i didn't just say that it's it's it's a hallucination on your part maybe you should go smoke a cigarette what my oh yours chair uh yeah did i ever tell you about the very first time that i had cigarettes it was new ports there was this mystery kid for mystery kid there was a mystery kid in my neighborhood you know

how mystery kid dude i swear to god one day one day i don't remember where this kid came from he's just like a new kid in the neighborhood and he was really tiny and he was half black old man that worked for big cigarette no no well because his name was Shane and he had a very deep voice he shows up in the neighborhood don't remember he said his he was living with his grandma like around the corner Oh, sure. And I was 15, I was 14 or 15, and my younger brother, Nate, was like 13, and we would hang out with him, and then one day he pulls out a pack of Newport's. And he's like, you guys have, you guys ever had a Newport before? And I'm like, I never smoked.

He's like, you should try it. It tastes pretty good. And I was like, okay. And I tried it. Cigarettes, they taste good. Yeah. Newports do taste good. Menthol?

I don't like the way they taste. Oh, I love it. So I was like, wow, this is like refreshing and smooth. And then, uh, just like a 1950s tobacco commercial. Wow, it's refreshing and smooth. There's just children on a playground. Oh, my, I feel like I can breathe better. Well, it's, it was just funny because then there was this, uh, group of kids who lived right

across the street from me, and they always hung out in the garage, and they were like 21. And we went by to ask them if they would buy us a pack of cigarettes because Shane was only 17. And they were like, how old are you? And I said, I'm 15. And Nate was like. I'm 14, 13, and then Shane was like, I'm 17, because it was something that nobody could be, yes, he was tiny, and he was like, he looked like he should be in like fourth grade, but he's like, his calling card just kept being like, I'm actually 17.

He was like, whoa, he's older. How old am I? I'm the mystery kid. It doesn't matter. I'm 17. And then, yeah, he was just there for like a summer and then gone. And I don't remember. Shane, if you're watching, reach out.

no he probably went into the military or something if i had to guess why i don't know you just seem that just seems like is that's what happens to all mystery kids well let's let's let's let's go right into speaking of the government speaking of the government i literally just got a text from the government no i'm sure everyone's getting a lot of these barak obama is putting out an urgent call don't ignore i don't I just say stop. Oh, every time I say stop, but then I get a new one. It's a new fucking list.

Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Please. We need your help. No, you don't. Bitch.

You don't need my help. You made your bed. If you need my help, call me. No, don't do that. Don't call. No, call me. Barack Obama, if you're out there, call me. I saw your daughter.

Did you? I saw her. Where? I saw her outside of a restaurant. You know what? I didn't see any secret service either. What's going on with that? Be careful, man.

No, it's not a threat. I'm just saying. I noticed that she didn't have any security attache. Is that the right word? I don't know. Do you see when he got called out for, I think it was Sam Minajka. He called him out for like,

he was like, you don't actually like all those songs on the year end list you put out and the books. He's like, man, I'm cool. Doesn't he smoke? Yeah. If the coolest president in the history of the United States

smokes cigarettes. You think Barack Obama's the coolest person in the history of the United States? Coolest president? Oh, president, I guess. Yeah. I don't know. Coolest person in the history of the United States? I mean...

That's got to be Bruce Springy. No. I'm... Okay, I was just jerking you off. Who do you think is the coolest person in the history of the United States? Jack Nicholson? Coolest person in the history of the United States. Stephen Hawking.

No. That guy who blew up the whale. Oh, yeah, yeah, sure. Okay, but for real, though. Taylor Swift, a lot. A lot. We got... So, it's, it's, it's, it's...

There's many levels to this. The right-wing fringe idiots are, they're convinced now that she is a Democrat plant to get Obama, or to get, look what you did, to get Biden reelected. I mean, it is no secret that, like, the Biden campaign would love for her to come out. But it's also funny because,

who fucking cares if she does? I would say her millions and millions of voting age fans care. You really think it would move the needle? Yes. No fucking way. I do. Okay. She single-handedly got tens of thousands of people to register to vote in like a single day just because from an Instagram post.

Do you remember voter die? Yes. It was like, P. Diddy. Yes. Yeah, but he did not have. No, but it wasn't just him. It was every celebrity came out and was like voter die. And then what happened?

Did John Kerry over? What year was that? man 2004 they know oh oh yeah iPhone hadn't even been invented yet so that mean yeah so so so everybody it's way 20 years ago it's a way different time people are smoking now dude come on people who are smoking that i don't think anyone gives a shit i just don't like especially the biden administration is obviously like very scared about losing the young vote right now and what is the young vote most pissed about right now, would you say? Uh, not having a good candidate?

I would imagine he's losing a lot of people on the war in Israel. Oh, yes. And a new war with Iran, me. And, you know, there's so many clips of young voters being like, I'm not going to support this guy who continues to fund this thing that I don't agree with at all. That is awful. And I can't imagine Taylor. Swift coming out and being like, vote for Taylor Swift.

Vote for Joe Biden. Everyone's like, okay. What if she came out and said, vote for me? What does that mean? Like vote for, like she runs. I don't. That's just that ridiculous question. What's crazy, I think that she could do that.

But it's also like, it's not going to make anyone, I don't think anyone's going to be like, even before, uh, this, it's like people didn't like, people didn't like him before people are pissed that he's no one's gonna dude have you been seeing some of these speeches where oh he's at the incomprehensible yeah at the great lake's thing with the

brewing insane yeah I don't know this is like going to be one of the most he's a sundowner man what's a sundowner is a is an elderly person who when the sun goes down so too does their

capability to articulate themselves did you see the video Donald Trump posted the retirement home, the fake ad. It's like an early 90s commercial for a retirement home, and he used all Joe Biden clips. It's like pretty well done. It's pretty fucked up. Watch it in the bonus.

Well, so the right wingers are now saying that, so on the one level it's that Taylor Swift is like a shill and is paired up with Travis, which is funny because they're two stereotypical, like white people. You got the fucking blonde, blue-eyed. or maybe she's got brown eyes uh Taylor Swift and then you got Travis Kelsey another fucking white all-American NFL guy you'd think that they would cream themselves over this because it's kind of like oh yeah they're all about having family and and um encouraging people to go

out there and have kids but no they're saying that the the Super Bowl is rigged and it's going to it's this is all just part of the plan that they laid out in Davos that the that Taylor Swift and him after he wins the Super Bowl, she's going to come out and go like, and also vote for Joe Biden. Do you think it's already set in stone? They think it's set in stone. I mean, here's the thing from Rolling Stone.

It's from this guy, Mike Crispy, some Dingleberry on Rumble video, which is the right wing YouTube. We're moving to Rumble soon, so stay tuned. He said the NFL is totally rigged. For the Kansas City Chiefs, Taylor Swift, Mr. Pfizer, Travis Kelsey, because Travis Kelsey is in a lot of Pfizer commercials. I do like that he knows that that's kind of like a deep cut and no one knows it. So he has to put his name in parentheses, Mr. Pfizer, Travis Kelsey.

All to spread Democrat propaganda. I'm calling it now. Kansas City wins, goes to the Super Bowl, Swift comes out at the halftime show, and endorses Joe Biden with Kelsey Ed Midfield. It's all been an op since day one. But my favorite is this, uh, fucking, this woman on one American network. America's pop star celebrity sweetheart joins forces with the top d'aws in the NFL. Playing for the team that's going to the Super Bowl.

This woman, like clearly. Three star. I want to hear her hit that forces again. She, uh, America's pop star celebrity sweetheart joins forces with the top. America's pop star does forces. What are you doing in L.A.? Why do you got the L.A. background? Get out of here. We don't want you here.

I keep playing it. I'm going to the NFL. Playing for the team that's going to the Super Bowl. I mean, let's be real here. This is bread and circuses on steroids. Major League sports in and of itself is nothing but a sciop. Get kids plugged into the cycle of going to public indoctrination camps, playing sports for their school, and go into games.

Many end up devoting their entire childhood to competing in various sports. only to be cut from the team at which point they become brainwashed into supporting professional teams because they know their dreams of becoming a pro athlete will probably never happen. That's true.

That's what happened to me. This is also so, like, just watching like the mental gymnastics is so exhausting of like, just even playing organized sports as a sci-op and what happens is you end up realizing you're not going to be one so you're brainwashed into watching it.

It's like, what are you talking about, lady? And I went for the high school baseball team summer before ninth grade. I had just hit my growth spurt and I was like six feet tall, but I was so skinny. I couldn't swing the bat because the bat was too heavy. No way. Yeah, I couldn't like fully give it a good. I was like, what the fuck? Why is this so heavy?

And yeah, so I didn't make the team. I didn't even continue. And now I'm obsessed with baseball ever since because that's the, that's the path. Cuck liberal. You don't even know what's good for you. Yeah, all I care about is baseball and drinking and Zen. Yeah, this is her fucking, you can tell that this is just someone fresh out of college who like may be majored in journalism and she just has no, um, she, she seems nervous to me.

She seems nervous. Yeah, she's kind of stumbled on it. So then they become obsessed with some grown man who gets paid millions of dollars every year to throw up. Who gets paid a million. of dollars every year to throw football around with other men I would imagine

football fans are just like normie no well because she goes in and makes one of the ball around while promoting poison death shots and child's slay wait wait what what was that she's referring to Travis Kelsey and how he yeah that's what they do

labor through various brand deals and endorsements so sad imagine being so brandy watched by sports, you actually show up to your team stadium to shovel snow for free so you can watch a bunch of grown men who are overpaid, tackle each other. That part I do agree with.

Showing up to shovel snow at their... They're in Buffalo. What else do they have to do? Stay home. They want to go out and watch their fucking team. It's just, oh my God. I haven't even scheduled the goddamn games. These fucking people man, they just can't... Here's another one. Here's one more from this

dip shit. King dipshit. D.C. Drano, dear San Francisco 49ers. I know we've all been roasting your city for years, but I am offering two-week truth. Oh, yeah. No more jokes about poop on the streets in open-air drug markets. No, calling out the record levels of homelessness

that magically disappeared for three days to welcome a communist dictator. None of that. For two weeks, 99% of America will be 49ers fans, but in return, you must defeat the chiefs. If you don't, Mr. Pfizer, Mr. Pfizer and his girlfriend are going to tour the country as world champions helping elect Joe Biden. World War III will likely follow in a second Biden term, and millions will die. The fate of the free world rests upon your shoulders.

Why not just assassinate Taylor Swift? You're not going to hit him with that no pressure? Oh, yeah, no pressure. Wait, how many likes does that have? Is that just some kind of friend shit or is that, like, blowing up? Let's see. Let's see how many impressions it's got. 28,000 like, two and a half million views.

Yeah. Oh, boy. They really do think, hmm. I will say, though, pull this one up. I'm sending you. It's Mattie, he might be joking, but everyone is so weird about this, like, entire thing. Oh, it's just, I love this photo because it invokes primal reactions in people.

They are the couple, everyone wishes they were in high school. they represent the summon of popularity and success. Those who fall short of this ideal cannot help but feel the sting of envy, a mirror into your soul. Yeah, I just look at it and I see Taylor Swift kissing Travis Kelsey. That's all I see. The only thing I see is the fact that he's still wearing his shoulder pads. The minute the game's over, I'm taking my shoulder pads off.

No, man, you put the t-shirt. Yeah, how did he fit that fucking t-shirt on over the shoulder my pads? Wow. Take the goddamn shoulder pads off. Yeah. Yeah. Well, and just to wrap up to Taylor Swift's shit, there's been, well, a couple things. There's been a lot of AI stuff of her, and she's already getting into litigation about it and like suing some guy who's behind it. Oh, with the deepfakes on Twitter? Yeah. And so Twitter, they've restricted certain search aspects with her. Like you can't search, I don't know, images of her or something. So people will figure out a way around it. But Elon is apparently pledging.

a hundred employees to help police content, which is funny because that's one of the first things that he got rid of. It's someone like pulled up an old tweet where they're basically like he's going to. He's going right back to what Twitter used to be. He bought it to get rid of all this stuff. And now he's just going to trial and error his way into being like, oh, it's just old Twitter again because it doesn't work unless you do that. Well, and this is one thing that kind of pissed me off because I do have.

beef with American Airlines. For those of you who don't know, they banned me from the American Airlines Advantage program for life, for taking advantage of their credit cards. Fuck them. But I'll still fly them sometimes. I'll keep drinking that garbage. These fucking animals, Kansas City to Las Vegas flight,

they're calling flight number 1989. And Las Vegas back to Kansas City flight is 87 because of Travis Kelsey's. I hope it works. I hope they get to complete the mission for Joe Biden. I hope they ritualistically make love on the 50-yard line, and he fucking cream pies are in front of America. And says vote. And says, vote for Joe Biden.

Oh, we'll come for your guns and your Zimpacks. And then everybody, you know. Then he activates the chips. Yeah, then he activates everybody's Pfizer chips. I'm waiting for mine to get activated. I can't wait. We're so far from the actual election. and everything's just going to get so much crazier.

Yeah, I still predict that Joe Biden is going to have a fall or, like, die. Oh, that, I mean, one of them's dead. One of them, either both or one. One and or both. Either of them or both will be dead inside of four years. God willing, inshallah, they will die. I just watched the pilot episode of Sex and the, city on the way back from Mexico so that's cute yeah what airline aero Mexico oh that's typical

i'm not saying that a bad way it makes sense but in the in the pilot episode they look at mr big and Samantha goes that's mr big they're saying he's the next Donald Trump and it's just so funny seeing it like it's such a different context you know that guy used to be like women want women want to date him men want to be him i wanted to date him did you want to date him yeah i want empty out into that gold toilet you know yeah my bussy i'll tell you what that boeing boeing i never get a number on themselves. Bowling? Boeing.

Boeing. I never get, Jesus Christ. Yeah, why? Because you were very nervous? I wasn't very nervous. It's just like on my mind. It's like I never, I've never thought about it before. And now I think about it.

And, you know, right before you get on the flight, you always like see a new headline, like Alaska found more Boeing planes with loose bolts. And like, Jesus fucking Christ. My Air China flight is a all airbus. A330 and then an A3.50. Do you see my Airbus tweet? Yeah, if it's not Airbus, I'm not, I'm putting up with us or something. You like that?

Yeah, pretty good. If it ain't Airbus, I'm making a fuss? Pretty good. Anyway, let's talk about earnings, huh? Sure. Have you heard of Super Micro? Come on, man. Have you?

No, you haven't. Yeah. No, that was the, mm-hmm, of a liar. It's the Micro Greens Company. Tell me what they do. Oh, no, nope. Oh, I meant microchips. Nope.

They don't want to do microchips either. Is it micro something? they is super micro and the ticker symbol is sm i and uh holy shit man this one pisses me off pisses me right off they uh they reported their can i can i pause to go pee real fast okay i'm back oh now i feel so much better super micro is is because part of what's going on now in the i super cycle that everybody's talking about is right now they're just building out the infrastructure for it and that's why you've been seeing invidia going fucking crazy because everybody's clamoring to buy invidia chips so that they can build their servers and build

everything out to create the because it's going to need so much computing power and memory and all sorts of stuff and super micro apparently has this i i think they do like cool like cooling, I should know this off the top of my head. It's like cooling racks or something. Isn't that what I said? No, you said, you said micro-greens. No, I said like micro-cooling racks. Oh, I thought you said chips.

I don't know. We can play it back. Maybe you're right. Yeah, you did. You know what you did. But it pisses me off because I heard about this thought. First of all, they've been around for like 20 years. They've been or longer than that.

They've just been under the radar, just a company doing their thing. and then like so many others the AI boom has just sent them to the fucking moon um but yeah there there's this guy on twitter who goes by the handle citrini seven who i really like and he tweeted about it i believe in 2022 and since then it's gone up a thousand percent and i think last week or two weeks ago uh super micro on a friday on a thursday after hours uh came out and said hey our our earnings in a couple weeks are going to be really fucking good, like better than we even thought. Stock spikes like 30% overnight. And then their earnings came out yesterday, aka three days ago for you guys.

Have you been getting in on this action? No. I bought some call options, but for the most part, I've just watched with my thumb up my ass firmly, just watching this thing go up. Like, it's just been insane. So they reported, and even though the market was already prepared, prepared for them to have big earnings, they still, the market rewarded them with another like 40 or 50 points. And I mean, good for them. It's great. And then today, two days ago for you guys,

Microsoft, Google and AMD. So AMD is playing catch up. And their stocks already like doubled over the last six months because their CEO has come out and said this, I can't remember her name, but she's come out and said the AI market is big enough. It's supposed to be. like a $400 billion market by 2030. And she says it's big enough for us to enter even in the fray. And is that the term? And take a good amount of market share. But all three of those are actually down after hours as of right now, Microsoft, Google, and AMD.

But that just goes into the theme of this episode. Everything's fucking rigged, man. I swear to God, dude. Joe Biden's already. been crowned president again it's just the the because taylor swift and her boyfriend want him fyser man but no really the the market is god he probably gets paid so much for those fyser commercial mr fyser well and and he's mr expeerian too oh yeah i see him on that hey everybody it's me Travis kelsey hey you know when i'm not getting my my new booster shop from fyser i'm

checking my credit score on expirion dot com oh what what do you look at that my credit score is perfect just like my girlfriend a touchdown that's that's going to be you know what that's going to be a slam dunk for me taylor travis is touch i said it's going to be an interception for me a touchdown it's the easy thing in the world to get you can intercept bad credit you know what won't be intercepted is your is your uh fucking girlfriend what's the line no immune system your immune system won't get commercial travis Intercepted by the COVID The crew's already packed up

Oh damn what the fuck He seems like the type to say What though Feezy? And it makes Taylor Swift laugh I did I did enjoy his You didn't enjoy his what His brothers Did you see his brother's tweet

Or not tweet His display of alcoholism? Yeah yeah yeah That's probably Yeah I saw that That's great. I would do that if my brother was chilling for Pfizer. He liked him to me stuff.

My boyfriend won't stop calling me a ton of pizza. Well, while you're looking that up, there's this new thing that's been introduced to the mark. Okay. Go ahead. This is a chaos episode. I got caught up in the magic of Bill's Mafia. It is electric. Jason Kelsey said on a Wednesday episode.

of New Heights, a podcast he hosts with his brother, Travis. The energy, the shenanigans, and I'm like, I got to have my shirt off at some point. He continued, and I didn't get to do it beforehand, and I can't just take my shirt off in the box. Like, who takes their shirt off in the box? So I'm like, you know what? I'm taking my shirt off, and I'm jumping out of this box. This is how my mind works after 40 Miller Lights.

Jason Kelsey said his wife, Kylie Kelsey, had tried to talk him out of doing it. I gave Kylie a heads up. She said, Jason, don't you dare. I said, I'm not asking for permission. I'm doing this, he said. She was already telling me to be on my best behavior because we were meeting. Taylor. I was like, Kylie, the first day I met you, I was blackout drunk and fell asleep at the bar. This is part of the charm. This is part of the Jason Kelsey charm. That guy's

arteries are probably rock hard. I mean, just, I bet he probably can drink 40 Miller lights. You ever seen that guy? He's gigantic. Oh, yeah. They're both huge. Yeah, but he's, uh, he's not like, like, Travis Kelsey is fit. Sure. This guy's like a lineman. I, do you think that, do you think Do you think that if they win, Travis Kelsey will propose to Taylor Swift on live television in front of everybody? No, I don't. Yeah, that seems, that seems classless. I wouldn't do that. Everyone's so nuts.

Yeah. Oh, can you imagine if he said I'm going to Disney World? Everybody, every conservative's head is going to explode. Oh, and he's trans too? Fuck. Fucking shit. Disney's like, I don't know. They're affiliated somehow.

I don't fucking know, man. I'm just tired of everything. Maybe he'll down a bud light on the 50-yard line. Oh, yeah, dude. He should just lean into it and go full bore. Sorry. Oh, shit. That's a rare throwback.

That's rare? An actual audible one toward the microphone? Well, so the other thing is I found this very interesting. So Apple, Amazon, and meta are reporting as of today for you guys two days from now on us. and Mark Zuckerberg's apparent new goal for the company for meta is achieving AGI What's AGI? Artificial General Intelligence

Oh, okay. You want to explain what that is? It's just the, it's like the, it's a computer's ability to, or artificial intelligence matching that of a human being. I feel like that's everyone's goal at this point. Yeah, exactly. That's what's interesting to me about this entire.

I mean, They all got to get in on this race. Mark already shot himself on the foot and was like, we're going Metaverse. And everyone was like, um, okay, idiot. I'm fine with that.

No, no, because, dude, meta's share price dropped like a fucking rock. It was down like 70 something percent. And now it is back at all time highs. Yeah,

because they're getting into all this, all this shit everyone else is chasing. That's what, that's what's frustrating about it. But yeah. Everybody suddenly, none of these companies gave a shit or even talked about or whispered in their, so much as whispered in their fucking earnings calls two years ago about

artificial intelligence or AI and all that shit. And it just feels like blockchain 2.0. You remember six years ago? Five years ago, everybody's like, oh yeah, we're getting involved in the blockchain. We're going to, we're doing blockchain technology and blah, blah, blah, because it was the buzzword. It's what everybody had to say to. The contracts were smart, Ben. Yeah, smart contracts. Yeah. No, that's what I said. So they're, uh, it's different because they're smart. Well, so now they're doing, everybody's doing that now. And apparently, it's paying off, I think, mostly for the picks and shovel. Well, for, like, Microsoft, it's paying off.

They're, even though they're down after hours, they're saying that it's, uh, AI is already helping them. Service now reported their earnings a few days ago, and they said that AI is really helping them. So I think for a couple companies, it'll work, but I don't know, for, for the majority, it's probably not going to do shit. No, probably not. The bubble will burst.

I still, I mean, I had to call, I've, what was it? who was I calling the other day, Verizon. And it was like, hey, I'm an automated helper. I can understand complete sentences. What can I help you with today? I'm like, I want to renegotiate my contract. Okay. Renegotiating or like, month it's like, I'm like, no.

Would you like to talk to someone? Yeah, I would. Okay. Yeah. None of your fucking business. Yeah. So, anyway, in good news, Tesla tanked when they reported last week. Yeah, on apparently a terrible conference call they had.

They're striving to make an even cheaper model in the second half of 2025, but everybody's concerned because that's going to involve a lot of capital-intensive shit. Elon Musk said, well, it's going to require us to break even more manufacturing barriers. And they're going to have to do all sorts of shit. and that would hurt margins even more. They said sales growth is slowing despite their price cuts that already have hurt margins, plus Chinese competition. I'm going to have a thing or two to say about Chinese competition.

Dude, you've got to get in those Chinese electric cars. My friend has one. He's got a Lee in L.I. Whatever it is. Or a Neo, I can't remember. You said it's like head and shoulders above everything else. Take pictures. I want to see him.

No, I'm not going to take pictures. Why? I'm kidding. Of course I'm going to take pictures. Jeez. Take a video. I want to see what's like in there. Dude, they're, they, you know.

Yeah, it's going to be wild. Speaking of AI, Instacart, someone, a shout out to this person, whoever put this on our subreddit, but Instacart is apparently using AI generated photos, and they're just so bad. It's crazy. It's so funny. So for the audio listener, I wish you could see it. I will say, it's close. It's good enough.

Yeah, it's close. If you were just like scrolling, you're like, sure, that looks like a pretzel. Ooh, salted chocolate pretzels, looks like dog shit. Grilled hot dogs. It's like, this looks like one of those impossible figures where you're like, okay, what, what am I, is it? There's lime and avocado on the hot sauce. Yeah, there's like lime, avocado, a basil leaf. Chocolate chip cookies.

Close enough. Yeah, it's like, it looks fine. Anchovy-free Caesar dressing, it looks like a soup with caterpillars or some shit on there. hot dog stir fry what is dressing if not soup with some caterpillars that's a great point man also i got up what was that one hot dog what hot dog stir fry it kind of looks like that's not even a real thing already sure it is if you're a bachelor sure the grilled salmon caesar salad i mean it looks close i i want to apologize for my hair i had to wash it today please apologize to everyone for your hair i had to wash it and it falls flat and gives me bangs it fucking

Why'd you have to wash it today? Because my dandruff is back, full force, and the only way to take care of it, because it's, it's like, it's like a fungal. Your dandruff is? Yeah. Well, because there's dry skin and then there's like, you have a fungal one. Yeah. So I got to use keto connozol dandruff shampoo. I got to put it in for like five minutes and leave it in, or, and do it like.

You can't get rid of the fungus? Dude, it's a fungus. What does that mean? It feeds on, on moisture. and sweat so like every time I'm at the gym or taking a shower it's going and it grows and then the next day I'm like flaky again so the only way to take care of it is medicated shampoo I'm getting grossed out man that's abelist all right well what else do we have we just got a couple more things what layoffs

no well we have the monkeys playing with the video games we promised the monkeys playing video games so give me the monkeys playing video game because do you send it to me Elon announced that the first the first neural link has been implanted in a human

and you know all I've wanted is to see the dang monkeys playing the video games he says they got them oh yeah yeah yeah we taught monkeys to play video games but this is the thing remember we were like why are they not talking about this this is from two years ago

yeah all right I will say. What? Well, you tell me if you think it's impressive. Okay. If you think, uh... This is Pager. He's a nine-year-old macaque who had a neuralink placed in each side of his brain about six weeks ago.

If you look carefully, you can see that the fur on his head hasn't quite fully grown back yet. He sucks at this game. He's learned to interact with a computer for a tasty banana smoothie delivered through a straw. We can interact with the neuralinks simply by pairing them to an iPhone. just as you might he's how do he didn't get taught because of the neural link

oh so you mean it's another fucking lie by Elon Musk just like how he showed that robot two weeks ago folding a shirt but then it turns out that it's a human operator on the internet the neural link can do

might pair your phone to a Bluetooth speaker the links record from more than 2,000 electrodes implanted in the regions of pages motor cortex that coordinate hand

and arm movements set him free neurons in this region modulate their activity I don't understand what's the deal dude can you just give me a TLDR what's going on here

he's playing video games yeah but he's it's the simplest fucking he's operating a joystick and putting a ball I'm thinking he's got monkeys playing cars yeah me too he's a fucking liar god damn it dude

fuck him I'm pissed off well mr. beast posted hi me in five years three years ago I figured out what it is about Mr. Beast, by the way, that I just, that rubs me the wrong way. Tell me. He, his eyes are dead.

And also, every video of his is, um, not inconsequential, but all the reactions from him and his friends are all just, oh, whoa, that's crazy. Whoa, that's a big car. Whoa, that's a big car. That's what bothers you about it? it yeah it's just it'll be like him we got a big car it could be a big car it could be a big car gonna be drive

how it's like it's supposed to be for anybody to like turn on yeah but sure but he goes yeah we got a big car coming it's gonna be a big car and then his friend in the back with bangs his friend who looks like this goes whoa it's a big car you should start wearing bangs

and doing big car you'd be more famous yeah okay guy, we got a big car. It could go fast. They hit Mr. Beast chocolate in Mexico. Mr. Beef?

Mr. Bean's. Mr. Bean's chocolate. No, they call him Senior Beast down there. Senior Beast. I don't know what they call him. No, it said Mr. Beast feastables or whatever on the chocolate. He's international. Well, we're going to talk about layoffs a little bit just because of how everybody's getting

laid off in tech. Unity laid off. Not just tech. Fucking journalism. Oh yeah, yeah. Well, and it's funny because it makes it

sound huge. Like Unity is like, oh, 25% of their workforce, but then it's like 150 people. That's still a huge of course,

but it makes it, the headlines make you think that people are just getting fired left and right by the millions, but it's not the case at all. I guess, depending on how you read into it.

But like, I'm not saying it's good or anything. A lot of community jobs are getting like just fully decimated. And gaming. Microsoft fired 1,900 people in their gaming. Right. I also think that's a big story. Like after they were like, you know, if we consolidate, everyone's jobs are safe.

We're not going to change anything. Like, don't look into our merger. And then all of something, they're like, psych. Oh, that's another part of the conspiracy, by the way, just speaking to these in Amazon, because Amazon fired hundreds of people on prime video in their film studios. but you know how they introduced ads on the default prime prime tv yes well you're going to be able to watch uh you're going to be getting joe biden ads probably on your prime tv it's all a

conspiracy who saying that fucking the smart people dude the playmakers the tastemakers the elites are people worried about that they're gonna yeah actually yeah that's part of the thing is like Oh, and you wonder why Amazon was rolling out the commercials so they could air Joe Biden commercials. We got to maybe make some like strategic mutes on your timeline. It's, okay, so in the bonus episode, we're going to talk about how Twitter has become virtually unusable and why it's making me so angry. Yeah, I think this, we're watching in real time you, what Elon Musk's new algorithm is doing to you. Yeah, and we'll just talk about some other shit. We got a pretty good

This tall-ass building That they're going to be building A deaf kid All kinds of shit All kinds of shit This attitude is carrying over Into the bonus No it's not

Yeah it is He's gonna have an attitude adjustment No I'm gonna yeah I'm gonna tweak it I'm gonna make it worse I'm gonna do small insults Small insults Yeah we're gonna do small insults What did you say?

Oh smelling salts Make sure you guys tune in Because these insults are tiny Tiny little baby insults Also, everyone wish Ben a nice trip and the merry, no diarrhea. Yeah, but please everybody, for all the witches out there, light me a candle, boil me a stew, and make it. Let me a candle, boil me a stew, make sure I don't have a bad poo. Poop, poop, damn.

But he's fucked either way. You know, he's going to be. That's, come on. He's going, he's going to text me going, the apartments are so small here and I farted so loud. I'm an hotel room, right, in an apartment. I farted, so... Wait, what was that from? When did I do that?

When you went to... Oh, yeah, when I was in Spain. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I accidentally just let one rip with the door open. It's a quiet-ass house. And they knew it was me. Oh, geez. All right, everybody.

Thank you so much for tuning in. We'll see you next time. Bye.