The Best of Car Talk - #2482: How Not to Run a Radio Show

Episode Date: October 12, 2024

Apparently, erstwhile producer Doug Berman does more than nap at his desk all day. The evidence: What happens when he heads out of town for a while leaving the rest of us to figure out how this radio stuff works. Enjoy the mutiny on this week's episode of the Best of Car Talk.Get access to hundreds of episodes in the Car Talk archive when you sign up for Car Talk+ at plus.npr.org/cartalkLearn more about sponsor message choices: podcastchoices.com/adchoicesNPR Privacy Policy

Hey, if you enjoy the best of CarTalk Podcasts, you should try out NPR+. With NPR+, you'll get access to the CarTalk Archives and other perks across more than 20 of NPR's most popular podcasts. Give a little and get a lot in return. Good deal, huh? Visit plus.npr.org. Hello and welcome to Card Talk from National Public Radio with us clicking clack the Tappet Brothers and we're broadcasting this week from the division of Well Duh here at Card Talk Plaza. I mean is it a Well Duh or what? They have discovered.

They have discovered. It's always they. Who are they? Well in this case it's interestingly doctors. Who are they from? I don't know where they're from. It was the New England Journal of Medicine that they have discovered that there is a close correlation between talking on the cell phone and having an accident. They had to do research to figure this out. I mean, you were ranting and raving here

just weeks ago about someone reading the newspaper while she was driving, and talking on the phone is just as bad. It was the Spiegel catalog to be precise. It was. Maybe, and she was ordering stuff on the cellular phone. Yeah, I mean, I don't understand it. I don't understand it. Why do we allow it to happen? What we who's we if we don't know who they are? How are we gonna know who we are? Well, I don't count myself along with me, you know No, we know well with you well It's we use the phones that have allowed the majority rules majority of people isn't it don't remember the flap about the

Sometime ago, maybe a couple of years ago, about cellular phones causing brain lesions? Right. And the majority of people that had them already decided to ignore the warnings. That's okay. And they had decided to ignore them because they'd already quit smoking. That's right, and they figured nothing could kill them now. Right?

So, yeah, something's gonna kill you. Well, I mean, the curious thing is that democracy is stupid. That's the curious thing. Because you get millions of people who decide that this is okay to do, and they're what? Dummies. And what are they gonna do? There are more of them than there are of anything else, so I guess that's the way it's gonna work.

Is this another thinly veiled attempt to insinuate yourself as philosopher king? Yes! I mean, we're supposed to have... That's what laws are for, aren't they? Laws are supposed to be made not by dummies. Laws are supposed to be made by people, hopefully, with some brain power. Wisdom. Wisdom, exactly.

Speaking of which, Montana. Oh, no. Well, it's the same situation what has Montana decided they gotta have speed limits because you can't trust hundred thousand people or whatever number of people live there to set up their own rules about how good how fast is good and how good is fast. You can't do it. Also they're going back now? They're going back now and they say we got to put a number up there. We can't just say prudent and rational and reasonable to you. You can't let everyone decide what's reasonable. We call that anarchy. Or Montana. Anyway, if you want to call us

about your car, put down your newspaper and your coffee, turn down your radio, pick up your car phone, dial 1-800-332-9287. Hello, you're on Car Talk. My name is Linda and I'm calling from Flower Mound, Texas. Say it again? Flower Mound. Flower Mound? F-L-O-U-R or F-L-O-W-E-R?

F-L-O-W-E-R. Flower. And what, is that near anything that we would recognize? Dallas. Dallas I would recognize. Barely. Dallas you would recognize. From the air maybe.

So Linda, what's up? What's up? We have a 65 Ford Falcon. Got it. We've got a problem with the carburetor. Uh huh. What happened was well we came down and we saw you guys when you were in town about a year and a half

ago yes and you talked to my husband and the original problem was that the engine bogged down on an acceleration from stop and you suggested replacing the accelerator pump i remember talking to your husband you do yes good yeah uh, uh oh.

I mean, it must have been my brother that was talking to your husband. Actually, you told us about the dart. Oh, yeah, it was me. Yeah. So the accelerator pump solution didn't work, huh? Well, my husband decided to rebuild the entire carburetor instead of just replacing the pump. Oh, so now it runs worse. Um, now it runs worse. Now it doesn't run at all. Well, what happens is it idles really slow and rough, but the idle will speed up if we

physically hold the choke in. Yeah. Okay, then the idle smooths out. So it runs better when you choke it, when you cut off the flow of air? No, it runs better when we increase the flow of air. Ah, okay. If we push the metal plate on the top down. Yeah, okay, gotcha. It runs better. Yeah, well that's the way it's supposed to be. That plate is supposed to be vertical when the engine is warmed up. Okay. So that's good, it runs better when it's supposed to. Okay. After the engine warms up, does it run good? Um, no.

No. As soon as we put it in gear, it dies. We can back it out into the driveway and then it dies. When your husband did this carburetor rebuild, how many Polaroid snapshots of the pieces on the table did he take? More importantly- How many pieces did he have left over? And does he have enough to build another copper ring?

Well, we've already got to the point where we can take it apart and put it back together in half an hour. Oh, good. So he's done it repeatedly and you've helped him. Right. And no matter what, you can't get it to run correctly. Right. I mean, this is not rocket science here.

This is only 65 falconry. Right. But I sure is not rocket science here, this is only 65 falconry. Right. But it sure feels like rocket science. I mean, you're sure that you've got the mixture adjusting screw in sort of the right place? I mean, did you do that correctly? You know, there's a mixture screw that's at the base of the carburetor. As you turn that in and out, it will dramatically change how the thing runs. Right. Theoretically, if you turn that thing all the way in,

you'll shut off the flow of gasoline through that circuit and the engine will not run at all. And as you back it out, you will increase the amount of gas and the engine will run better and better and better. And then as you continue to back that out, it'll begin to run worse. And if you continue to back it out from that point, it'll fall out on the street. Now, which screw about six-cylinder isn't it's a two-barrel but the two-barrel okay but it's got uh...

uh... so that the things that the excellent and that's a two-barrel but it's got the top out of the vacuum-piston automatic choke fleet piece on the side yeah i I it sounds to me like an adjusting problem I mean have you ever done this adjustment before we've just gone through the instructions on the but on the rebuild kit sounds like it's too lean that's why when you put it in gear it conks out because it's not getting enough gas yeah I think what you did is you adjusted one of the barrels and

didn't really adjust the other one very well and Maybe the other one is turned in all the way So you're running on only one barrel instead of two which would make it idle beautifully But as soon as you put it into gear bingo, it's gone dies Okay, take those two screws and back them out a couple of turns and call us back. Yeah, we'll wait right here Call us back today Is the car there? Here but the carburetor is not on it the carburetor is on the counter turn and call us back will wait right here call us back today is the car there

the car here but i'm ready to come out of the car for a different kind of uh... it's on the car you know i thought that we'll have to wait for next week then yeah put it back on back off the back out those two screws i don't know two or three turns it should at least run reasonably well you should be able to drive it Okay, right back out two screws and call us in the morning

1-800-332-9287 hello, you're on car talk. Hey guys, how you doing? This good Jeremy Cohen from Beckett, Massachusetts Jerry Beckett. Yes, that. Jeremy Beckett? Yes. That must be out west. Yes, it's right near Pittsfield Mass. Ah. Yeah, far end of the turnpike. Yeah, really? I'm better known around the garage as the bolt breaker.

The bolt breaker, huh? I just seem to have this fantastic ability to every time I have a real simple repair on my car, I'll go out and try to do it myself you know no case in point the last one was the water pump I think the water pump on my truck cost about 90 bucks yeah and I bolt I broke a bolt way back it's an 88 Ford f-150 is the bolt went way back and of course it broke in such a way I couldn't get it out I wanted to have to have the truck towed this is a long bolt?

Was this one of the long bolts that goes through the timing case cover? Exactly. Oh, you're stupid. That's V1. Every other bolt came right off, no problem. Did you have to pull the engine to get it out? No. But he got it for a couple days.

And then of course it's one of those ones where they get in there like, well, it's all the way to the timing cover. The truck's got 130,000 miles on it, I'm already in here. Oh yeah, they did the right thing by putting a new chain on. A new chain and a new pulley or... Gears. Two new gears and a chain. Yeah.

Perfect. Good idea. But the whole thing, one of them costing me 500 bucks. It was a blessing in disguise. Instead of 90. But every time I do it, I do brake, I went to try to do brake pads, I broke a bolt off in there and had to have it towed and I just keep doing so for and over again And apparently there's something wrong with me that I don't just stop

Do you break do you break bolts when you're tightening them up or when you're loosening taking them off? Oh, that's okay. That's okay Okay, yeah, see that usually is not your fault I mean for example you were taking off a bolt which maybe has never been removed in 20 years. Right. And so there it is, rusted away, and as I remember, that's not a very heavy bolt. Right. No, it's very... It's a 5-16's bolt and it's very long. Right.

And it's also all encrusted with rust in there. Yeah. So you're in a water environment. so I can make an excuse for that one. I'm not surprised that you broke that one off. Okay. Are there any others that you broke and maybe we can really help you to become a moron? And the brake caliper bolt you broke, you broke the bolt that holds the wedge

into the brake caliper. Right. Right, it does break all the time too. Yeah, see it may not be your fault. I guess what you'll learn eventually is... To take it to somebody in the first place. Well, I mean, is how hard to push and how hard not to push. Okay.

Are there any tricks or... Yeah. If you, for example, had a penetrating spray to put on there, that would be an alternative. And you would try to move it a little bit, you would try to loosen it, then try to tighten it, and try to loosen it, and try to persuade it out. You you would try to loosen it then try to tighten it and try to lose it And try to persuade it out you go loose tight loose tight right to finally you got it moving You'd spray some more stuff if you had a torch The break the break one was like that. I think it took me like three days to break it Spray it and I'd wiggle it a little bit and spray it and I think I think by day three

I finally got frustrated and put like a six foot pipe wrench. Well yeah, you have to resist that temptation. But I think Jeremy that you have a future here. Yeah, I mean, the sprays and heat will usually help you, but sometimes it's inevitable. I mean there's nothing you can do. Alright, great. Yeah, if you were breaking them when you were tightening them, then I'd tell you to give up, sell your tools.

Yeah. Okay. And then tell these guys who are calling you the bolt you to give up, sell your tools. Yeah. Okay. And then tell these guys who are calling you the bolt breaker that none of these is your fault. All right. Well, thanks for your help, guys. All right. Thanks for calling, Jared. Bye-bye. We'll be right back with the answer to the puzzler right after these very important messages.

One year ago, the event that changed a region. Heavily armed Palestinian militants in Gaza flew across the border. The October 7th Hamas attacks on Israel. Israeli ground troops have entered northern Gaza. How the war unfolded and where it could be headed. Pagers carried by Hezbollah members began exploding in cars. Listen to a special episode of the podcast, State of the World from NPR. Arizona is a swing state with a booming Latino population. Joe Biden flipped it blue once.

Could Kamala Harris do it again? NPR's Consider This Podcast is talking to Arizona voters all week. We have to go recruit our compadres, our compadres, our neighbors. How do issues like immigration and abortion play in the Grand Canyon State? Listen this week on NPR's Consider This Podcast. Once again, we find ourselves in an unprecedented election. And with all that's happening in the lead up to the big day, a weekly podcast just won't cut it. Get a better grasp of

where we stand as a nation every weekday on the NPR Politics Podcast. Here our seasoned reporters dig into the issues that are shaping voters' decisions and understand how the latest updates play into the bigger picture. The NPR Politics Podcast. Listen on Spotify. All right. Well, anyway, without further ado- I remember the puzzler. Aren't you going to ask me? Go ahead. Had to do with spark plugs. Listen on Spotify. Men in need of what? Softer underwear. And I explained that you bend over a hot engine all day and you begin to shave, shave, shave, shave. Yeah.

So we have these meetings from time to time to share advancements in underwear technology. Anyway, following a spirited discussion on boxes versus briefs, one of the guys, I don't remember who it was, it was Pete or Manny, Ashley says, gee, I have an observation. Yeah. You know, new cars are moving towards lower maintenance,

but it strikes me that newer cars should require spark plug replacements more often than older cars. Yeah, because in the old days, you had to replace your spark plugs every 15, 20,000 miles. Now, 100,000 miles. Well, maybe never. Oh, maybe never.

They should just glue them in. Some of them are glued in. And when he said this, I said, well, geez, I don't know. Then he explained it to me. And I said, geez, you could be right. So the puzzle question simply was, what observation had he made that led him to believe, and me too, that newer cars should require spark plug replacements more often than cars of yesteryear. I should mention that many newer cars come through

with platinum plugs, which will last longer. Yeah, but even if they weren't platinum. If they weren't platinum, they say, oh, change your plugs every 30,000 miles, but his argument was. Does it have to do with rotations? Yes. Does it have to do with number of sparks per mile?

Yes. Ha, ha, ha! But not the way you think. Yes. Ha! Ha! But not the way you think. No. Actually engines run more slowly now than they used to. See it say, oh. Yeah, they do.

Yeah, they do. But what happens, many cars have distributor-less ignition. Exactly. And let's look at a typical forstle in the car, if you will. If you will. Typical forstle in the car has not one ignition coil, not four ignition coils, but two ignition coils. And when number one spark plug fires on its power stroke on a conventional engine, number one would fire the number three, the number four, the number two.

So every two revolutions of the crankshaft, each one of the spark plugs has fired one time. One time. However... And only one spark has gone to it. Only one spark has gone to it. But with distribulous ignition, when number one piston is up on its compression stroke number four is up not on its compression stroke But up on its exhaust stroke exactly

But because there's one coil for those two cylinders spark a spark goes a waste spark goes to number four exactly Okay, yeah And of course it doesn't do anything because there's nothing for it to combust except wear out the spark plug That's what causes the electrodes to wear out the spark jumping from one electrode to another So in two revolutions of the crankshaft each spark plug doesn't fire once each fires Twice so they should wear out twice as fast every 10,000 miles you should need new spark plugs every weekend Instead you don't need them every 10,000 miles you should need new spark plugs. Every weekend. Instead you don't need them for 50,000 miles.

Explain that paradox. So actually the puzzler question however was what was the rationale that he used that made you agree with him? And that was the rationale. And that was it. So that's the end of the puzzle. That is the end of the puzzle. Doesn't mean we can't continue to discuss it.

Odd. Nausium. Because why is he wrong? So that's the end of the puzzle. That is the end of the puzzle. Does it mean we can't continue to discuss it? Odd? Nausium Because why is he wrong? It certainly does sound right to me. And the reason he's wrong is that modern ignition systems generate much higher voltages and are capable of jumping a much bigger gap so as the plug wears out It is no longer rendered ineffective as plugs of yesterday were. Sure, but you'd think that the 50,000 volts is gonna make it even wear out even faster. Well evidently it doesn't and when it does wear out it can still jump the bigger gap and still ignite the gas and there. But anyway it was an interesting observation wouldn't you say so? Very insightful.

Who's our winner? It's sighted a riot at the shop as a matter of fact. The winner is Camille Perrin from Kittery, Maine? Yes. Home of my father-in-law, mother-in-law, and all those wacko brothers-in-law? Holy cow. Kittery, Maine.

And for having her correct answer chosen at random here, Camille, you're going to get your very own Car Talk Sistine Wrench t-shirt. The creation. God, that's arench t-shirt. The creation. God that's a great t-shirt. Brand new, never been seen, never been worn. Usually remember we used to have a t-shirt and we would send it out to the winner, he would wear it, he or she would wear it for two or three weeks, send it back to us, we'd wash it. Those are the good old days. Send it back out again again now we have count them to teach

So Camille you will get the t-shirt as soon as we get it back from last week's winner. There you go Anyway, we have a new puzzler another Interesting I might add automotive puzzler coming up during your eyes and have interesting. I think it's an automotive That'll be coming up during the second half of Car Talk. In the meantime, if you'd like to call us, the number is of course 1-800-332-9287. Hello, you're on Car Talk. Hi, this is Brenda from Oakland, California. Hi, Brenda.

Hi. Oakland, huh? That's it. I have a car-related relationship problem. Ah, yes. Ah, we should have called last week. Sorry, we can't be bothered with this relationship crap this week. Call us next year.

It's pretty serious though. It's serious? Alright, we'll take it then. Alright, what's up? Okay, I've always driven cars with automatic transmissions. I've never had any reason to learn how to drive a stick. But recently, I've been thinking about asking my boyfriend to teach me how to drive his car, which is an 83 BMW.

Oops, 83? However, I'm worried that if I let him teach me how to drive his car, which is an 83 BMW. Oops, 83? However, I worry that if I let him teach me how to drive a stick, it will introduce certain tensions into our relationship. You ain't kidding. We might just end up killing each other. Not might. But the other problem is that right now, my car is in the garage and his car is in front of, in the driveway.

So every time I want to go out, I have to ask him to move his car. Do you live on a hill? No. That can end the relationship real fast. Well I mean if the only reason you want to learn how to drive the stick is to back the car out of the driveway. Oh no no she has other motives. I mean you really want to learn how to drive stick shift don't you? It would be a good thing to know, I think. Well, I mean, you could, you could, if you mention this to him, if you ask for lessons. He's not eager to teach me, because he knows. He knows you're going to burn his clutch out. Yeah.

Uh, geez. Why don't you just pay him for the clutch in advance? It'll be a challenge to him to teach you to drive correctly. Now I have taught many people to drive stick shift. One of them was my wife who was a very good driver, but was reluctant to drive it. And in a half an hour, under my expert tutelage and guidance. She burned out a clutch. No, she melted the clutch of my Colt Vista.

No, no, she learned to become an expert manual shift driver. I've got a few simple lessons. Yeah? Yeah. Oh, that's encouraging. No yelling aloud. That was her first requirement. She said, you yell at me, I'm getting out of the car.

Yeah. Do you think I should let him teach me? Well, yeah, I think there is a danger I mean there really is a danger because some people have an aptitude for this and some people just don't but I think He would know if you have the aptitude for this within about the first minute Mm-hmm, and if you don't have it then he can cut you can call off the lessons Tell him you do a minute by minute thing. Every minute he's got the option of calling it off.

But to tell you, BMW clutches are usually pretty easy to work and if there's a car to learn on that's good. Yeah, there's a very good one to learn on. Yeah, BMW is a nice clutch to learn on. And the nice thing about it is you won't even know that you're burning it out. Keep windows closed smell it and I would save this for like just when you when you know You're getting ready to break up with this guy Save this little activity for those last couple of weeks And then he can have the op this is great as a matter of fact

Oh, this would be a good reason for him to break up with you That's right. You decide that you've had it with him've had it with him and you don't know how to say it. That's when you introduce this basic idea. Then you burn out his clutch as you're learning to do it. He gets royally ticked off, breaks up with you and you say I'm sorry you feel this way hun and off he goes. Isn't that good? Yeah, I can see the person, lad, now. Single white SWF knees, new BF with MS. Yeah, good.

Okay, well let us know how you make out with him, the car, the clutch, everything. Okay, I predict, I predict that within an, you'll be driving expertly. Okay. All walking back to your apartment one after the other. See you, Brenda. Thank you. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Be sure to stick around for more calls and the new puzzle are coming right up.

Hey there, it's Ian and Mike, and on the How to Do Everything podcast from the team at Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me, we will answer any question you have, no matter how ridiculous. Like maybe you want to get a haircut in space, and you're not sure how. Astronaut Frank Rubio has had a haircut in space. We plan for everything, right? And so it's not a pretty haircut for sure, but it's functional. Listen to the How to Do Everything podcast from NPR. Hey, it's Mike and Ian. We're the hosts of How to Do Everything

from the team at Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me. Every week we take your questions and find someone much smarter than us to answer them. Questions like, how do I safely jump out of a moving vehicle? How do I dangerously jump out of a moving vehicle? We can't help you, but we will find someone who can. Listen to the How to Do events. We don't just tell you world news, we take you there. And you can make this journey while you're doing the dishes or driving your car.

State of the World podcast from NPR. Hi, we're back. You're listening to Car Talk on National Public Radio with us, clicking clack the Tappet brothers, and we're here to discuss cars, car repair, and points to ponderonder or things to think about. Things to think about. Sent to us by JJ Rabinovitz. Jeffrey Rabinovitz. There you go. Just a list of things to think about. For example, it doesn't matter what temperature the room is. It's always room temperature. This is a good...

I got a dog and I named him Stay. Now I go home and I say, come here, stay. After a while the dog went insane and wouldn't move at all. Stay. That is a kind of cruelty, isn't it? Cross-country skiing would be great if you lived in a small country. Last year for Christmas I got a humidifier and a dehumidifier. I thought I'd put them in the same room and let them fight it out.

These are very interesting things to ponder. They are indeed. They are indeed. They are indeed. Well, talking about things to ponder, ponder this. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha that when he went away on business trips, his car would be dead when he returned a week or so later. Mm-hmm. But when he drove the car every day or every other day, as the case would be, it was satisfactory. And he took it into us and we did all the usual tests, testing for a current drain and all that jazz,

were unable to find anything wrong. Yeah. So we sold him a new battery anyway. Yeah. Right? That would be a anyway. And an alternator and voltage regulator and all that stuff. All the usual stuff. It was bolt pavement time. He goes away on another trip and he comes back and he's incensed that the battery has

been killed again. He said, there's something wrong with my car. please check it out." So we check it out and we find nothing wrong. Whereupon we attempt to return the car to him and he says, I'm going away on another trip. I want you to keep the car. And let it die on you. You miserable no good rock. In fact, we made the offer to him, whenever you you go on a trip leave the car with us for a week So he agreed to do that. He would leave the car for a week. We would not touch it for an entire week It would be parked. Yeah in one spot Because we insisted there was nothing wrong with the car and he wanted to prove to us that in fact

There was something wrong you that you might be morons He returns after a week the car starts starts right up. Turns the key. Yeah. We hold our collective breaths. Yeah, yeah. It starts right up. Yes, I knew it. He says, shucks.

Yeah, listen to what he's saying. What could I be doing wrong? What could be different? He accuses us, of course, of driving the car every day, charging the battery up on the slide, disconnecting the battery so it didn't run down. We pleaded innocent to all charges and in fact we had done nothing to the car. And then I asked him one question. One question. Oh, this is beautiful! Beautiful! I asked him where he parks. Yeah. He tells me where he parks when he's gone for the week.

Yeah. In fact, he tells me where he parks when he's not gone for the week. Yeah. Parks in his driveway. At which point I said, I know what's wrong. I know what's killing your battery. So if you think you know too, send it to us at Puzzler Tower, Car Talk Plaza, Box 3500, Harvard Square. I should add that all the information you need...

Of course, of course! You don't even have to say it! ...is right there. Right, of course! Because that's all the information I had. Box 3500, Harvard Square, Cambridge... Our first city. That's all the information I had. Yeah. Box 3500 Harvard Square, Cambridge. Our first city. Meh, 02238.

Or you can email us your answer from Cartalk.com by clicking on the Talk to Cartalk section. Now I'm getting sick of reading this other thing if we choose the correct answer. Everyone knows the rules. That's it. That's it. If you want to call us, the number is 1-800-332-9287. If you don't know the rules, email us or we'll send you the rules. And what if you don't want to call us?

Well then what's the number? Same number. Hello, you're on Cart Talk. My name is Celine and I'm calling from Hollywood. Celine. Yes. I should mention that the reason I didn't read that thing about the correct answer at random is because Berman isn't here this week. Yeah. Berman cracks the whip. Where is Berman anyway? Now get this. Wait a minute, Celine. We're sorry to have interrupted. I'm sure your question is... Hey, you guys keep on going. You might even know where Berman is. He might be in Hollywood.

Yeah, maybe he's in LA. The weather's great. Well, he could be. He could be. He gave us some bogus. He had to go on a business trip. Right. He said, your business is here in our fair city. He has to go to Colorado on a business trip and then to Taos, New Mexico. There is no business in Taos unless you're carving jackknives.

I'm making belt buckles. Yeah. What is he going to, mining for turquoise? What the hell is he doing in Taos, New Mexico? Trying to make a few bucks. Business Mike Foote. So while he's away, we're not going to do anything. We're not going to do anything he wants us to do.

Yeah, so if we choose the correct answer, you win. So while he's away, we're not going to do anything. We're not going to do anything he wants us to do. So if we choose the correct answer, you'll win. And if we don't, we'll let you win anyway. All right, Celine, what the hell do you want? Everybody's going to win this week. You send in an answer, we'll send you a T-shirt. 50 T-shirts. Celine is S-E-L-E-N-E.

It is. Goddess of the Moon. How'd you know that? Oh, he knows everything. Wow, I guess so. He's in touch with Ocio Parosus. Who's the guy you're talking to? It is goddess of the moon. Oh, he knows everything He's in touch with No, it's Omeon aspy avados, yeah, oh me on my channel man Goddess of the moon Yeah yeah. From LA.

Yeah. I have... Not just LA. Pardon? Hollywood, LA. Hollywood, specifically. Are you a star? No.

Not just the moon. No. I feed the stars. Oh, you do? Yeah. Oh, you're a waitress? No, I'm a production caterer. Oh, really?

Yeah. Oh, so you get to know what the stars like and don't like as far as food. Exactly. Any peculiarities we should know about? Let's see, who's picky? Yeah, who's picky? Who's the biggest pain in the butt? Um, gee, you know, if I say I might never work there.

Alright, who's the nicest? Who's the nicest? Michael Douglas is the nicest man I have ever met my life no kidding no kidding he's i guess you've never met us then saline have you that that that not yet not yet like that so that's nice to know things like a nice guy actually really really nice uh... i'll give you a uh... i mean when i think i'll ever work with her again shannon doherty

i don't know i'm sorry i know she again. Shannon Doherty. I don't know who she is. Oh yeah, no, she's meet everybody. Not nice. And she had to have a case of, I think it was Avian Water delivered to her trailer every morning so she could wash her hair. Oh God. Pfft. Pfft.

But I don't think she's gonna be working too much anymore. So, we can talk about. Who's the guy that we met that we liked? Martin Sheen. Do you know Martin? I think I may have worked with him. He's the only Hollywood person we know. And he doesn't know us. I mean we know him. We met him. He seemed very nice also. Yeah. Yeah. Wow. I shined his shoes for him. Nice job kid. Here's a quarter. Split it with your brother. Your brother. Half and half. We've been fighting over that for ten years. So what do you want, Celine?

I have, it's actually not mine, it's my boyfriend's. Which is a 1980 Cadillac Seville with a squashed butt. I have a 1966 Dodge Dart. Oh, now you're talking. Which Di-11, my mechanic loved it too, my mechanic won't work on my Cadillac. Anyway, when a car is cold, and only when it's cold, it won't start. So I put the key in the ignition and I turn the ignition and it goes, whadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadad Well, you don't have once it does start you don't have to rev it because I'm sure you've known Yeah, once it starts if I don't read it for a long time. It'll die That's a separate problem

All maybe not maybe we're misjudging here, huh? There are a million miles on this Saville No, there are 53,000 miles on the Saville and I put ten of those on yeah 53,000 miles on the Seville and I put 10 of those on. Yeah. Well, your mechanic doesn't like working on this car. Correct. And he doesn't want to work on it. Right. So you've got to get it to someone who does.

Well, I took it to Cadillac because he said take it to Cadillac. There you go. So I took it to Cadillac. Yeah. So they said you're going to have to leave it here overnight. That's true. So we can start it when it's cold. Good.

We can't give you a ride home. We're going to have to hook it up to a diagnostic. That'll be $180. It doesn't go towards the price of fixing the car. Sure. And that's why I'm calling you. But now something new has happened with the same problem. Now when I rev it up, recently I start revving it up.

And now it goes, BAH! laughter I just scared my cat. laughter Go get the cat from the top of the refrigerator, we'll wait. laughter And does it keep running after it goes BAH! laughter Or does it stop? Yeah, no, it keep, well see, as long as I keep flooring it, it runs.

Well that's good. I've been getting the feeling, as you were talking, that the timing on this car is way out of adjustment. Now this is a simple thing, and I think that's all it's going to take to fix it. The timing? Ask you, what's what all it's gonna take to fix it the timing ask you What's your dark guys name my dark guys name is John and he owns John's truck in auto in North Hollywood And his wife's name is Sora and they are so wonderful. They also work on the catering trucks Oh, I trust them with my life. Yeah, they are marvelous Asked John and Sora with if they if they have someone someone else nearby that's not the Cadillac shop that can work on your Cadillac, another gas station perhaps or a repair shop, independent repair

shop. You don't need a Cadillac dealer to do this. It sounds to me something simple. I think it might need some spark plugs or timing. When it finally does warm up completely, does it run great? It's fine. No, it's perfect.

Does it take off, have pretty good power? Yeah. Yeah, or does it go poof? Not as good as the Dodge, but yeah. Not as good as the Dodge. Not as good as the Dodge. That says a multiple. Take it to another garage.

They will figure it out, and I'm telling you, it's gonna be bad ignition timing. Okay Oh me on us be overdose has spoken to me from the other side Uh-huh, and he knows that that's what it is. I am getting yes message. Yes daughter of the moon Yeah, daughter of the moon. It is Omeon and it is timing and I'm getting messages about a bad camshaft. Camshaft. You don't want to know. No.

I don't. If you're lucky, it's my brother's suggestion. Okay. But I think I'm right. Okay. Let's give a bad camshaft. Uh-oh. Just a guess.

Yeah. All right. I have an intuitive feel for these things. Good luck. Say hello to your boyfriend. Well, that's great. And say hello to Michael Douglas and everybody else. But don't say hello to that.

You know what Thanks guys for the advice. Hurry up and go pick up those sandwiches they're waiting for you. Don't forget the Evian water. Uh oh never. Bye. A case so she can wash her hair. Excuse me.

Speaking of pulling up on a light. You just said when you pull up to a light and step on the brake does it stall? Remember a couple of weeks ago now we did the Valentine's Day show, the relationship show and we asked a question and the question was how do you really meet somebody in traffic? If you happen to be in traffic, you get the scenario, you pull up and she pulls up and you look across and there she is, the girl of your dreams. Ugh! What do you say?

So we got some really bogus suggestions. I mean, I have to say, men, I don't have a clue. I mean... Whew! Well, let's hear a few of these. I'll give you a few here, hold on. Could I buy you a drink or should I just give you the money? I like that one. My favorite, Bond, James Bond. From then it gets worse.

It gets much worse. Pardon me, I have some Camembert. Do you have any Grey Poupon? And that's sort of the idea. We'll put the great ones up on the website and we will vote on, we'll have everyone vote on which ones are the best ones. Sometimes no words are better. Especially when you only got words that we know.

1-800-332-9287. We're gonna have some words with a caller. Hello, you're on Car Talk. While you've wasted an otherwise perfectly good hour listening to Car Talk, our esteemed producer is Doug the Subway Fugitive, not a slave to fashion bourbon. And the work fugitive, too.

Work fugitive, right. Our associate producer and dean of the the work fugitive, too. The work fugitive, right. Our associate producer and dean of the College of Autonomous Ecology is Ken Babyface Rogers. Our assistant producer is Catherine Cathode-Ray. Our engineer is Karen Given. And our technical advisor, who's currently ranked number one in his weight class in the Celebrity Pro-Am Free Lunch Tournament of Champions.

He's the only one in his weight class. Well, that's why he's ranked number one. He's John Bugsy, milk carton man lawler. Our public opinion pollster is Paul Murky of Murky Research assisted by statistician Margin O'Vara. Our director of new product repair is Warranty My Foot. Our staff butler from the Car Talk Bombay division is Mahatma Co. Our head of used car purchasing is ULB Puffinit. Our director of speed bumps is Slow Me Down Milosevic. Our head of used car purchasing is ULB Puffin' It. Our director of speed bumps is Slow Me Down Milosevic. Our director of listener support is All Noah Fun Drive.

Our director of country music is Stan Byerman. Our director of cold weather starting is Martina Never Turnover. And our manager of automotive accessories is Francis Ford Cup Holder. Our chief counsel from the law firm of Dewey Cheatham and Howe is ULUIS Dewey, known around the square as Uee Louie Dewey. Thanks so much for listening.'re clicking clack the tapping brothers and don't drive like my brother don't drive like my brother we'll be back next week we hope bye bye

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