The Best of Car Talk - #2536: The Felix Unger Noise

Episode Date: May 6, 2025

Car noises can be tricky things to describe. Paula's Ford is making an annoying, whiny, nasal sound that reminds our odd couple of hosts of another 'Odd Couple' from the past. Check out this episode of the Best of Car Talk.Get access to hundreds of episodes in the Car Talk archive when you sign up for Car Talk+ at plus.npr.org/cartalkLearn more about sponsor message choices: podcastchoices.com/adchoicesNPR Privacy Policy

This is Ira Glass, the host of This American Life. So much is changing so rapidly right now with President Trump in office. It feels good to pause for a moment sometimes and look around at what's what. To try and do that, we've been finding these incredible stories about right now that are funny and have feeling and you get to see people everywhere making sense of this new America that we find ourselves in. This American Life, wherever you get your podcasts. Before we start the show today, you may have heard that President Trump

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I have, yeah. This isn't cruel, but it certainly is unusual punishment. Listen to this description. Okay, give us the sound effects. Ho, ho, ho this prison is for you do don't you? I do yeah, read the clip read the clipping news article right here from the Boston Sunday Globe April 12th 1998 in Japanese prison traffic offenders are shown errors of their ways Says this is not a place for hardcore criminals Ichihara prison is reserved for dangerously irresponsible

hardcore criminals, Ichihara Prison is reserved for dangerously irresponsible drivers. And they go to jail. That's good. See, the Japanese, they don't fool around. And that's the way it ought to be. I am moving to Japan because I realized that both the police and whoever else is involved in whatever kinds of law law enforcement enforcement are supposed to be taking place in this country have given up they've given up they the police have thrown up their hands and the judges have thrown up their hands

and said we give up you guys win do whatever you want they go so I am moving to Japan hey get this God it says it says that isiyama, who's I guess the warden, says, the Japanese way of thinking is that one must never cause trouble to others. Yes, that's kind of the Japanese golden rule. You must never cause trouble to others. I'm beginning to talk to you about this. I guess they won't let me in, will they? Well, if you want to cause trouble for us, you can call us at 1-888-CAR-TALK, that's 888-227-8255. Hey, wait a minute, stop, stop right there.

I stopped, I'm dead, I'm dead in my tracks. I got a letter here from somebody. Where is it? You're going to love this. Dear Tom, this is from Ed Druitz. I've devised a few additional quick and easy ways that you can use to announce your new car Talk telephone number one eight eight eight two two seven eight two five five for example Did you know it is the anti log of ten point two seven six oh five four three nine three two four Did you know that it is two thousand six hundred and sixty two point eight seven nine one nine four one seven two cubed? Do you know that it's the cosine of seventy nine point one one five nine degrees times ten billion? It's the anti-log

of ten point two seven six oh five four three nine. Is it really? That's the way to do it from now on. Okay, well you'll be in charge of the higher mathematics department. What is the number? 18882278255. Okay, hello, you're on Car Talk. This is Matt in Prescott. Prescott. Arizona. Matt, Prescott. Arizona. What's up, Matt? I got an 83 Toyota 4x4 pickup and it only roll starts. Uh-huh. I'm thinking it's the starter but I want to know if I should get one or refill it. Sounds good. You turn the key and what does it do? Nothing. Nada. Nada. This vehicle, if I'm not mistaken, is it a standard shift? Yep. It has a switch on the clutch pedal that prevents you from starting it unless you depress the clutch.

Is that true? Yes. It's possible that that switch is no good. And if that switch is no good, it would behave exactly the same way as a bad starter or a broken wire someplace else. If you stick your head up under the dash, you will be able to see that there is a clutch pedal, you'll see where the clutch pedal pivots, and attached to a bracket in the vicinity of the clutch pedal is this little switch.

Looks like a little silver cylinder that's maybe about three quarters of an inch in diameter and has two wires connected to it. When you step on the clutch, you physically depress this switch. And then this allows current to go from the key to the solenoid which turns the starter motor which starts the vehicle. Okay. But without this part working correctly nothing will happen. It would be the equivalent if you're trying to start it without stepping on the clutch at all. Okay. So what you must do is take these two wires, disconnect them from this little switch, stick a paper clip into where the two wires would have connected to the switch.

In other words, you're going to jump the switch. You know what I'm talking about? And then you're going to try to start it. If it starts, you need to replace that switch. Or get a stronger paper clip. And you do have to replace it because that means you'll be able to start it without stepping on the clutch Which is dangerous. Well, we did we did we did do it for 150 years. I know that but in the new

Mentality we have of doing everything for morons make everything so that the stupidest person can handle it We've got to have this switch Right. We're gonna have cars to talk to us and remind us to check the oil. And despite all the lobbying by the RGDA. I'm tired of parking on hills too. What's the RGDA? The Replacement Garage Door Association. This technology has prevailed. It has, yeah. So if the switch is bad and you don't think you can deal with having the switch out of the circuit, don't leave it jumped, replace it. Okay. Yeah, that sounds like it.

See you, Matt. Okay, thank you. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye. 1888 Car Talk, that's 888-227-825. Hello, you're on Car Talk. Hi, this is Cameron.

I'm calling from San Francisco. Cameron? Cameron, that's right. Cameron. I have a serious problem. Speak to us, oh great one. Okay. I'm writing a letter to you.

I'm writing a letter to you. I'm writing a letter to you. I'm writing a letter to you. I'm writing a letter to you. I'm writing a letter to you. from san francisco camera and camera and camera and that's right camera and i have a serious problem speak to us all great one okay i'm writing a book called the bad girls guide to the open road it's due to my publisher next week and i still haven't figured out how to burn rubber now this is something that i think women really really need to know how to do and the men in my family have disappointed me and i thought i'd call you guys and see if you could help me out. Well, what is this book, The Bad Girls Guide to the Open Road? How girls could behave badly behind the wheel of the car just like boys have done since the

beginning of time. Exactly. We don't need this book. Oh we do need this book. We don't need this book. Well did they give you an advance? Absolutely. Take it and run. Don't deliver the damn book. Let them chase you. Well, you know, it's interesting because I have noticed, and I was in the process of writing a little R&R, as we call them, a rant and rave about the fact that more and more women are testosterone poisoned. I have found more incivility, is there such a word? Oh yes. Among women, more aggressiveness on the road among women lately. Maybe it's just directed toward you.

To me. Well I'm hoping that women who will buy my book and there will be even more of them out there on the road doing the same thing. And you'll be rich and you won't because because you'll be living on the Amalfi coast and you won't care what goes on here but that's okay it's a fun book it's a humor book yeah yeah we understand I hope so all right how you do it how to burn rubber first of all if if you have an automatic transmission car it's kind of hard to do and not impossible and if you have traction control it's hard to do because

it won't permit you to burn rubber right i think that might be my problem one of the cars i've been trying well back in the old i remember when i was in high school my pal ed green convinced his father to buy facility is he in now i don't really know all your friends from high school seem to be but he convinced his father to buy a brand new I believe it was a 65 Chevrolet what was it called at that time in Palo probably yeah with a

stick shift no so he buys his car with a big yeah. With a stick shift. No. So he buys his car with a big V8. And a 350 engine. And a stick shift. And this was a car for burning rubber. In fact, the great deal was to drop someone off at his house an hour after his curfew. And as he was trying to sneak in to, as they said, lay a patch of rubber by doing the following. Putting the gas pedal about 90% of the way to the floor and popping the clutch. While your foot is still on the clutch.

Yeah, your foot's down on the clutch. You're in first gear. You put it in first gear, you floor the gas and you let that clutch right up and it is accompanied by screeching tires and smoke. The smoke is burning rubber. Yeah. And all the neighbors of course would turn their lights on and it would be pretty exciting. So that's the classic way to do it and you have to figure out how to do that with littler

cars which isn't so easy anymore. It's not so easy. Yeah, I was not getting the desired effect. It was sort of sounding like an embarrassing problem. Well what are you trying it with? Are you doing it with a stick shift? I've tried it with a stick shift and a... Automatic.

Automatic, yeah. Well, with an automatic you can load it up, you know, you can floor the gas pedal practically while holding your foot on the brake. You know, get it up right past that red line. Get it up to like 7,000 or 8,000 RPM and then pop the clutch and you'll burn rubber. Yeah, if you get the RPMs high enough you can do it with even the Honda Civic Yeah, now one one other question. How bad is it for the car? That's bad. It's bad Oh, yeah, you know every now and then you know yeah, I mean Ed Green did it with his father's car. What did he care? Yeah, it's better to do it with someone else. It's better to do it with someone else's

Borrow a car and borrow a friend's car. Good luck Cameron. You're welcome. Thanks a lot. Oh our pleasure. It's always good to help. Bye. Now before we give the answer to last week's puzzle we have to take a short break. Yeah I mean Dr. Frankenstein warned me to be sure to let my brother's brain cool off every 20 minutes or so or he'll get afraid of fire and we don't want that to happen. We'll be back in a minute. This message comes from WISE, the app for doing things and other currencies. With WISE, you can send, spend, or receive money across borders, all at a fair exchange rate.

No markups or hidden fees. Join millions of customers and visit wise.com. T's and C's apply. Are you like me suddenly using words like conclave, cardinal, and papa billet in casual conversation? Well, friend, you too may be pope-pilled. I have a whole list. I was starting with like 25, 30 names

and I was like whittling it down. I'm imagining you like Claire Danes in Homeland, like the full board, like some strings connected. For everything you need to know about picking a new pope, listen to the It's Been A Minute podcast today. Does the idea of listening to political news freak you out? Well, don't sweat it. The NPR Politics podcast makes politics a breeze.

Every episode will break down the day's headlines into totally normal language and make sure that you walk away understanding what the day's news might mean for you. Take a deep breath and give politics another chance with the NPR politics podcast available wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, we're back. You're listening to Card Talk with us, click and clack the Tappert Brothers. And here is the answer to last week's puzzler. What was the puzzler? Ah.

You're going to tell us. No, I'm going to tell you because this is not the kind of puzzler that you'd remember. Most aren't, actually. No, yeah, it doesn't matter. A customer who shall remain nameless called up the other day and said that a brake job we'd done had gone awry. We'd done a brake job on his old Volvo. We had put on new pads and new disc rotors on all four wheels.

Oh yeah, the bad rotors. And it was all right for several months. And all of a sudden, Dick calls and says, oh, Dick, and says, gee, now when I step on the brakes, I get a rumbling. In fact, when I step on the brakes really hard, the worse it is. If I step on them gently, it's hardly noticeable,

if at all. But when I really step on that pedal, boy, those things rumble and shake like crazy. Geez, I don't know. One of those discs must be warped, he says. He brings the car in, we drive it around, and sure enough, he's right. It is rumbling. Classic symptom of a warp disc. Anyway, you put the dial indicator on this thing, you determine that there's nothing wrong with any of the new discs. So we check all the bushings, the tie rod ends, the ball joints, you name it. We check everything, figuring that any one

of these front end components could be wobbling and causing this, this problem because there are interesting dynamics set up when you slow the wheels down. Sure, sure. But we find nothing. So since Dick has a pain in the neck. What's his last name?

Was he supposed to remain Dick? We put four new discs on, figuring that maybe the dial indicator's off. Who knows? I mean, why not? The guy's a good customer. Even though all evidence is to the contrary, the customer is always right.

He says he's got bad discs. He's got bad discs. Right, and he spent thousands on this job anyway. Thousands. We drive the car. Guess what? The same thing happens. He's got bad disks. Right, and he spent thousands on this job anyway. Thousands. We drive the car, guess what? The same thing happens. Back on the lift it goes and hours go by.

We have Ralph chained to his toolbox until he figures a thing out and he's standing there underneath the car, right in the middle of the car with wrenches in hand. And he's ready to remove something and I say, what are you doing? And he says, I know what's wrong with the car. What what's you're gonna remove that's right in the middle of the car that's gonna solve the problem no break parts in the middle when you said this I I said the hanger bearing you said no I said the transmission mount you said no but you were close you were close shaft! Yes, Dick had a seized universal joint. So when you step on the brake, what happens is this,

when you step on the brake at low speed and all, when you step on the brake gently. Got it, of course. The angle of the car doesn't change much with respect to the ground, but when you step on the brakes hard, the car does something called nosing or diving. The front bumper dives to the ground

Half-gainer half gainer and the driveshaft has universal joints on it, which must flex But if one of those universal joints is seized when you're asking it to flex to accommodate this new angle of operation It begins to shake like crazy. Yeah, it was only doing on a hard breaking Ralph figured out that it was because the thing was nosing and causing that that C joint to have to try to bend. And it couldn't that was causing the vibration. Pretty nifty, eh? He took out the drive shaft and sure enough, you found that to be true. No, it was all right.

Actually. We saw them do you join? And rear struts. No, that was it. And it solved the problem. Who's our winner Tommy of our 10th anniversary car talk t-shirt this week? I got pieces of paper here it is. The winner is Dan Vissenton, Vissenton, Vissenton? Okay. From Oyster Bay, New York and for having his

correct answer chosen at random from among the thousands of the correct answers that we got this week Dan from Dan Vicenten from oyster Bay, New York It's a t-shirt that says celebrating ten years of bad car advice How come everyone who writes to us says PSI wear an extra large does that say something about our show everyone says I wear an Extra no, you know why they want one extra large if you're gonna clean windows with this You want you want a small you want as much as much material as you can get there you go And the extra large ones are the same price as the small ones. Yes indeed Which is if you win the puzzler free now, we have a brand new automotive slash logic

Puzzle coming up in the third half of today's show. So don't touch that dial I think it's kind of nifty in the meantime We'll take your calls. Of course at 1-888-CAR-TALK. That's 1-888-227-8255 Hello, you're on Car Talk. This is Ted. I'm in Chicago. How you guys doing? Hey Ted, we're doing great. What's up, man? Well, here's the deal guys. I bought I don't know you I don't know how you guys are gonna feel about this I did take your recommendation on never buying a new car. Yeah, however You want to flip the auto trader and I saw one of those auto auction deals?

Oh, yeah, it's a federal auto auction. Yada. Yada. Yada. Yeah. So anyway, I I picked up a Ford probe It's a 1991 GL four cylinders five-speed. Wait, let me get this down Ford probe Yeah, GL four cylinder five-speed correct got what year ninety one ninety one that's it wasn't paying attention uh... i'd i think that the auction twenty six hundred bucks i looked in the car the interior is pretty good at a hundred thirty four thousand miles on it to which i said walk away i start walking away and by the time i turned around some guys in my face going you want it for

five hundred bucks so i said what the hell let's go to vegas and i did it why not five hundred dollars exactly for a 91 I figured even if it's completely spent I could trade it in for at least that of course so I take it over to one of these shops it's a national thing I'm not gonna advertise for them they take a look they put it on a diagnostic machine they say the compression is good the

engine seems good it needs new brakes and you know some other minor things so I invest about 800 bucks in brakes a new timing belt new struts did you have the pep boys do the work or not that was them yeah yeah they did do the work yeah and they were good now I get home I park it in my garage I come out the next morning it's about 35 degrees I start the car and it is it's as if I work for a special effects house in a movie Because it is just smoking down the street man. I mean it was just just blue gray white I don't know what color smoke and it would go for about five minutes. Yeah, really heavy Yeah, and then it stops. Yeah, and you didn't notice this when you first started it Well, see the way they auction it off is they drive it up in front of you it's

already running all their warm in the mopping the room up outside so i take it to my closest mechanic is just privately owned little thing and the guys looks into it and he goes could be about them feels could be the head gasket could be the rings and you know i series uh... what is that exactly unit engine okay it's mean we'll cut right to

the chase here. Exactly. You need an engine. You don't have any bad valve guide seals. You got those plus you got no rings left. Really? Yeah. How much am I looking at investing? Because again I only I've paid maybe 1600 for it and I don't know how far I should continue to go. You're looking at another 2k. Yeah. Unless you want it to get a used engine. Okay. I mean, if these Pepboy guys have checked it out and it really doesn't need any more stuff... Okay. ...except for an engine...

Yeah. ...why not? But now who would I go to to put in an engine for me? Your other guy that checked out the engine? Yeah. He may be willing to buy an engine for this thing and put it in. I mean, there are remanufacturers that ship all over the country right it'll sell him an engine And he dropped this baby right in there, or you can try to find a good secondhand one

You know something with low mileage like hundred and twenty hundred twenty five thousand No, in all honesty. What do I want to chase like forty fifty sixty thousand miles on this yeah? I mean, but if the difference in price is not significant. I would go for the rebuilt one. I would go for the rebuilt. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, for less than $4,000, you're going to have a car with a rebuilt engine and a new clutch, which you're obviously going to do when they do the engine. Right. And it's going to be a dreamboat.

It's going to be a dreamboat. Fantastic. Good luck, Ted. See you, Ted. Thanks, gentlemen. Thanks, McCall. Bye-bye. Hey, do you know what it's time for now? Time to order more filters from Universal Air Systems? Ha ha ha!

No! It's time to play Stump the Chumps! This is the part of the show where we bring back a previous caller to find out how good or bad our advice was. And we are on the continuant lies between useless and criminally negligent. Everybody's so picky these days. Anyway, today's contestant on Stump the Chumps is Kim from Charlottesville, Virginia. Kim as all our callers are is an art history major and even though she was very busy working on her friolator technique

She found time to call us about her 88 Dodge Omni. No, there's a work of art. Yes a timeless design Anyway, it was overheating in a very bizarre way I remember this call the temperature gauge would shoot up to the hot zone whenever she turned on the heat on on Jerry All right, I got it! Well, that doesn't make any sense. No, if the engine's overheating, the temperature gauge should go down when you turn the heat on.

Why? We were quite stumped by all of this until you, I believe, had a little brain drizzle. I did? Yes, yes, yes, I remember. It will. Please don't leave me over Hill Reservoir. Okay, I've got it.

You've solved it. I have got it. Go ahead. You are going to lo- I could kill you! This is going to be so good! Get it over with because you- No, even you are going to love- you're going to say, How the hell did

you figure that out? The longer you applaud yourself the harder the humiliation is gonna be to accept. Get this I'm ready. Okay. You have a leak such that it is squirting. Hot coolant is squirting. Are you ready for this? On to the temperature gauge. Oh no. Boy, when you go for it. I really go for it. I didn't leave myself anyway out of this, did I?

No, no wiggle room. It's a term up the river. All right, let's just get right to it. Kim, are you there? Hi. All right, Kim, before you reveal to the world whether I'm a genius or a moron Again, my brother has to read you the common Miranda warning Yes, have you ever worn fruit on your head?

Is it true that the answers you're about to give here on stomp the chumps have in no way been influenced by our staff? The staff of National Public Radio or the maintenance workers at Yankee Stadium. Yeah. All right was my brother right or what? He was completely off base So good though Did you ever figure out what it was it's the head gasket What they pressure tested it three times and it was only when the heat was on that they found that there was a leak In the head gasket. If I'm not mistaken, that was one of my suggestions.

Was it not, Kim? It was. And what happened? You know what happened? You got wowed by the flash. My answer was nice and quietly stated. I didn't mean it. It was no big fanfare.

He comes up with the, ooh, ah, ooh, I got it, I got it, ah. I thought he spilled a cup of coffee on his lap. I didn't mean it was no big fanfare. He comes up with the Ooh, ah, ooh, I got it, I got it, ah! I thought he spilled a cup of coffee on his lap. No, no, even you, when we discussed the head gasket issue, I remember even you saying, it doesn't make sense that she turns on the heater and the gauge goes flying up. No, no, I didn't make sense.

Still today doesn't make sense. I did remember, I do remember having said that I've seen it happen like that. Didn't I say that Kim? I think you mentioned that with somebody else who had a similar car. Yeah, I mean I just I mean he's my older brother Well, it sounded so good to me at least yeah well yeah well all of the Mechanics that I mentioned that to looked at me like I was Didn't tell them right and then I told them where I got

I was really not. You didn't tell them who said it. Right, and then I told them where I got the information. Oh. Oh, well. Well, so your car's all fixed? No. Now the engine is sputtering. Well, I mean, I hate to argue here,

but I mean, it's possible that you do need a head gasket, but it may not have anything to do with the strange behavior of the temperature gauge. I don't think so. I have to appeal. You ever heard the term, cut your losses? I'm sorry, I have to appeal this decision. Oh, the appeal was denied.

Okay, well, easy come, easy go. Kim, thanks for playing Stump the Chumps. You're welcome. I'm sorry that our answer didn't help you, but you will live to fight another day, I'm sure. Yes. Did you get a job yet? No, not yet.

I'm still working on that dissertation. Oh, okay. And are you practicing your verbal skills? Do you want fries with that? No. No. See you, Kim. You guys are awful. Good luck. RG3 is a noble profession. It is, I know. Okay. Good you, Kim. You guys are awful. Our history is a noble profession.

It is, I know. Okay. Good luck. Bye bye. Thanks. Bye. Now, before we get to the new puzzle, we have to take a short break. Take a haircut? Fortunately, just a trip. On the Indicator from Planet Money podcast, we're here to help you make sense of the economic news from Trump's tariffs. It's called in game theory a trigger strategy, or sometimes called grim trigger, which sort of has a cowboy-esque ring to it. To what exactly a sovereign wealth fund is. For insight every weekday, listen to NPR's The Indicator from Planet Money. Know that fizzy feeling you get when you read something really good, watch the movie everyone's

been talking about, or catch the show that the internet can't get over? At the Pop Culture Happy Hour podcast, we chase that feeling four times a week. We'll serve you recommendations and commentary on the buzziest movies, TV, music, and more. From lowbrow to highbrow to the stuff in between, catch the Pop Culture Happy Hour podcast from NPR. We're back. You're listening to Car Talk with us. Click and clack the Tappet Brothers, and we're here to discuss cars, car repair.

We haven't discussed either one so far. And the new puzzler. Now, which you said would be partially automotive and partly logic. Well, I said automotive slash logic. Yeah, okay. Now, well, they're all that. I gotta tell you that I remember having used this puzzler before,

but my compatriots, i.e. my brother and Berman, insisted I haven't. And our staff archivist, recent emigre from Southeast Asia, slong gone, says that she checked all the tapes and... And it's not there. It's not there, so I'm gonna assume that I didn't use it, and here it is.

I don't remember. Many, many years ago, I receive a late night phone call from my brother who tells me that his car has broken down. He says, I need help. Do you have a rope to tow with? And I say, yeah, sure. I'll be right there. So I watched Ted Koppel.

I watched The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson. I watched the right there. So I watched Ted Koppel. I watched The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson. I watched the late movie and then I just, I take a shower. Tom Snyder. Tom Snyder. Paid programming. And I decided to head out and give him a hand. And I arrived with my car, tow rope in hand, and he's of course asleep in the car, snuggled up with one of his pet raccoons, and I wake him and ask him what the story is. He tells me what's wrong with the car.

I say, I can't tow you, you knucklehead. And he says, no, we only have a few blocks to go. I can tow you. And I say, the Indian rope trick. And he's right. What's he talking about? You never used this puzzle. What's wrong with his car that enables him?

He's broken down now. He called me. Yeah. Woke me up yeah good made me come out there I he told me home I can't tell you and I say I'll tell you there you go now if you think you know the answer this is good all the bosses away this week and your cubicles near the stamp machine, send your answer to Puzzler Tower, Car Talk Plaza, Box 3500, Harvard Square, Cambridge, M.A.T. 02238, or you can email us your answer from our website,

cartalk.msn.com, just click on the Talk to Car Talk section. And if we choose your correct answer at random from among all the correct answers, you'll get one of our new Car Talk T-shirts featuring the slogan, Celebrating Tenis with Bad Car Advice. Well, you always have to do those disclaimers in a hurried fashion, otherwise people hate you. Yeah, it's the equivalent of small print. It's called fast talking.

If you'd like to call us, our number is 1-888-CAR-TALK. That's 1-888-227-8255. Hello, you're on Car Talk. This is Paula from Tulsa. Hi, Paula. Paula. 8255 hello you're on car talk. This is Paula from Tulsa. Hi Paula, how are you? Actually I've been waiting a long time to have a car problem just to talk to you. Really? Yeah. You have one now, cool. Well here's the problem, it's an 88 Bronco II and whenever we hit about 2,000 RPMs. We hear this sort of whistle and it goes up like perfect thirds

each every 500 RPM. So at 2000 RPM it goes like, like that. And you can't hear it outside the car and you can't hear it if you open up the hood. You can only hear it outside the car and you can't hear it if you open up the hood you can only hear it in the car right and it comes like it sounds like it comes from under the passenger area love it it sounds like it comes from the area where the fuel sensor or the heat of core is under the dashboard yes and when you let

up the accelerator it quits it doesn't like go down in thirds and it just quits immediately i love it! Let me just get the whole... The noise is coming from under the dash. It's coming from under the dash and it's constant? At 2000 RPM. So at 2000 you get the sound and then if you start to accelerate... It stays at that sound and then it jumps to the next third. Yeah. A major third or a minor third? I think it's a minor third.

A minor third. Yeah. It's almost like... It's almost like... And then it will stay at that third until you get to 3000,000 rpm, and then it will jump up to a higher third Well before we lose any more listeners than we already have lost I'll try to give you the answer okay the answer is coming from the device Which is the heater control device which is operated by vacuum?

Okay, you have a vacuum source that's coming through the firewall that supplies that heater control mechanism. And that's going to be broken somehow. There's a vacuum leak there and it changes when you increase the RPM because the vacuum goes down. The way you're going to isolate it is you're going to find that hose that comes through the firewall that supplies the vacuum to the heater and you're going to remove it. But when you do that, you can plug that thing with a little rubber cap and then drive the vehicle and the noise will be gone. I don't want to ask any embarrassing questions at this late hour.

Never stopped it before. But how does this explain the incremental thirds every 500 RPM? I don't! I mean... Come on, that's what I was hoping for! I mean, sure, anything you can say, anything makes a sound. She gave us some very precise specifications here. I do not know what peculiar dynamics are at work here.

I missed this course. Then don't waste our time with the rest of your theories because they don't matter. Of course they matter. That's the only thing that we're interested in is the physics involved in this quantum leap of thirds. That's all we care about. You can take your vacuum hose and stuff it.

One other thing, one other thing that I wrote, Dan, that I also forgot to tell you. Oh, good. Well, the fuel was low and then when we topped off the tank, the noise was still there but not as loud. Er. Ah ha ha ha ha. Oh, okay.

See? Now he's got it. Now he's going to go with the fuel pump theory. And I'll tell you why. Yeah. And I'll tell you why. And you're going to tell us exactly why the Thirds I would occur. I don't know why the thirds occur

But the but it is the fuel pump is the fuel yeah the fuel pump pressure does change as a result of engine RPM Because of the fuel pressure regulator, okay, which has a vacuum Which which is controlled by a vacuum source. Okay. And the noise would be, here's the noise it makes. Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn And I want you to pinch off that vacuum hose. So it's a pinch off the vacuum hose. That feeds the heater. Okay. Try that. I mean, I don't think my brother's wrong about this.

I was hoping for more. Something elegant. I was hoping for it elegant, explaining the thirds. Yeah. The thirds. I mean, that would really take... It's definitely minor thirds. Give me a minor third. thirds I mean that I mean that would really Hey Paula we will work on this this is not the end of this story Okay, you do your part you pinch off that vacuum hose and tell us if the noise goes away

And we will be working on a theory of minor thirds. Okay. Say it Paula We will be working on a theory of minor thirds. Okay. Say it, Paula. Thanks, Macaulay. Okay. Well, it's happened again. You've sublimated another hour listening to Car Talk. Our esteemed producer is Doug the Subway Fugitive, not a slave to fashion, Berman.

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