The Best of Car Talk - #2631: The MechanXfiles

Episode Date: April 18, 2026

The 'Speed of Darkness', a 'laying on of hands' and paranormal activities in the Pentagon parking lot. This episode of the Best of Car Talk is definitely ‘out there’, somewhere.See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for sponsorship and to manage your podcast sponsorship preferences.NPR Privacy Policy

Hello and welcome to Car Talk from National Public Radio with us Click and Clack the Tappert Brothers, and we're broadcasting this week from the physics department here at Car Talk Plaza. Is Professor Las Lodzza here today? He may be. See, something that we, not just we, but I mean the entire world thought was impossible, may now be possible. Now, you may have read about this a few weeks ago in the newspaper, scientists in Princeton, New Jersey, using a combination of atomic and electromagnetic manipulation, have made light travel faster than light.

Get out of town! I mean, Einstein postulated that nothing, nothing can travel. Including light, can travel faster than 186,000 miles a second. Which, in my opinion, is plenty fast enough. Well, interestingly, these guys have gotten light to travel so fast. You ready for this? Yeah.

That the light comes out of the machine before it goes in. All of this, of course, raises a fascinating, practical question here at Car Talk Plaza. A few years ago, Bugsy, who's in charge of procuring and delivering cars to us, had to deliver a test car to Tommy. And he called Tommy up in the morning and asked when he would be at his office. And Tommy said, well, I'm going in a little late today. So Bugsy said, well, that's okay. I'll come in the afternoon.

Tommy said, well, I'll be leaving on the early side. Well, I had stuff to do. To which Bugsie replied, Well, don't leave too early Or you'll pass yourself coming in. So now, it may actually be possible for me to do that. You may have been doing it all the time. You may have been on the brink.

As always. I'm on the cutting edge of technology. Indeed. As always. Man. Now, look, if your car is not traveling at the speed of life, or even the speed of dark. Call us and we'll try to help the numbers 888 car talk.

What is the speed of dark? Dark is faster than light. Isn't it? Maybe. I mean, I think so. The speed of dark. Again, see, on the cutting edge, no one has even mentioned the speed of dark before.

Does it seem not important? Not anymore. The speed of dark. 1888 car talk. that's 888-22-25. Hello, you're on Car Talk. Hi. Hi.

I'm Carleen from Alexandria, Virginia. Carleen. Hi, Carline. As in C-R-L-I-N. Almost. E-E-E-N. I had E-E-E-N. Carline.

From Alexandria, Virginia. Right. Got it. What's going on, Carleen? Well, I have a 1985 Toyota Corolla that six years ago had problems steering. It was making this. terrible noise when I would steer it. Took it in, told me I needed a new rack and pinion system.

I said, fine. Three years ago, the same thing happened. When was the first incident? How long ago? Six years ago? Six years. Mm-hmm. Now, three years ago, we got the same thing.

Same thing. Yeah. So I took it back, and they said, you need a new rack opinion system. Uh-huh. I said, I put a new one in. Oh, yeah, that was a rebuilt system. It's only guaranteed for a year. Okay.

So I put a new rack opinion system. A new one or another rebuilt? Another rebuilt. Okay. Yeah. And what happens in all cases? Well, now actually what happens is when I turn the wheel, it'll stiffen up. It's almost like it gets stuck, and then it'll release, and it'll stiffen up, and then it'll release. Oh, really?

Which is different than what? Oh, yeah, and you know what? That's not the rack. Good. Well, is it something better? It's something a lot cheaper. It's cheaper. Oh, okay. Yeah. If every 90 degrees, it's getting hard to turn, and then the subsequent 90 degrees, it's getting easy, and then the next thing.

90 degrees it gets hard again. This is cheap. This is relatively cheap. It's the steering coupling. There is a coupling that goes between your steering column and the rack. See, if the rack were bad, it in all likelihood would be difficult to steer over the whole range of the steering. Okay. So if you tried to turn it left or right, you'd find it equally difficult in both directions, but also you wouldn't find easy spots and hard spots in the turning of the wheel. Right. And this coupling is like a little universal joint. And it's a It freezes up. It gets crutted up.

It russes up. Yeah. It gets, what happens is water gets into the joint, and the joint freezes in one direction so that it can't flex in both directions but can flex only in one direction. And hence, it makes the wheel hard to turn half the time. Okay. I hate to be suspicious, but I am. Oh. I think what they're going to do.

Oh. No. No. You'll think? No. No. I think they're going to, they know what it is. This is like wiping off the.

They're going to do both. They're going to replace the rack and the coupling. And, of course, your problem will be solved. By the same token, they could also replace your dashboard. And that would also solve this problem. So they could do three things. Yeah. But only one of them is necessary.

Tell them you don't want the rack replace. You heard it on good authority that the steering coupling is the problem. And that's what it is. I guarantee it. Okay, great. Sounds good to me. See it, Carleen. Good luck.

Bye-bye. 1-8-88-car talk. That's 888-227-8-8-255. A lawyer on Car Talk. Good-day. My name's John from Portland and Oregon. Hi, John, from Portland and Oregon. What's up?

Well, I got a 93 Volkswagen Fox. And when I first had it, I was out in Asbury Park, New Jersey, and it ran around just like a little sewing machine. Then I drove from Asbury Park all the way out to Portland, Oregon. And that's when the trouble. started. It'd be like about every three, 400 miles, all of a sudden it lose power, it has started chugging, and almost conk out. And we'd get out, show the people what was wrong, and they'd say, oh, you've got fuel in the engine. And I'd fix that up. And so every 400 miles,

I'm forking out like $100, $200, they put in two new fuel pumps along the way. Then finally, I got to Rapid City in South Dakota, and the man says, well, this is a fault in this car. You've got to get a special part for it because it builds up static electricity. Really? And it's called a harness, he said, harness for the airflow sensor. Ah. Anyway, they put it in. Then 200 miles later, it starts doing the same thing again.

Bummer. What I found, but this is the embarrassing thing of it, Now the only thing I can do is I have to get up, open up the bonnet, and touch it all over the engine. The laying out of hands? Yeah, and the thing is, I'm a Catholic priest. I'm always dressed up in my clericals, and I jump out of the car, lay hands all over. And this works. It works.

You can make a fortune, Padre. I can. Yeah. You can be out there on the freeways every day. Oh, man. That's all it takes, huh? You're wasting your time-saving souls. Yeah, and Snapp Warner's wasting its time-selling tools.

I mean, you don't need the tools if we have you. Well, I'm having sometimes more luck with my car than I do on some of the parishioners. But, I mean, does it still happen? Still happens. But does it happen every three or four hundred miles? No, no. It'll happen sporadically. Sporatically.

Well, let me tell you a little story. Our nephew, Matthew, who's also been known as pork chop boy, or into the fact that he couldn't get any dates and had to tie a pork chop around his neck, even to get the dog to play with him, had a late model Volkswagen, which also has an airflow sensor like your car. I forget what year it was. And he had exactly the same problem.

We tried a million different things, none of which involved replacing the airflow sensor because, as you may know, it's very expensive. But I suspect that that's the problem. And I'm not sure that even replacing it would fix it because if there's a design flaw, it may not get fixed because the same flaw will be in the new one. But I think that's what's wrong with his. And what finally fixed his car. Was he sold it?

Was he got hit by a bread truck twice? One of his friends arranged it. I don't know how that happened. The first time didn't kill it, but the second shot did it in. Yeah, when the Brenttrak had to back up to get them again. But I think that if you're going to fix this thing, you're going to have to buy yourself a new airflow sensor. Ah. And the harness, I think, was an attempt at solving the problem.

But if there was a static buildup, it may have damaged the delicate circuitry in the airflow sensor and been too late for the harness to do any good. Oh, I see. You know what I'm saying? In other words, the harness was designed to prevent further damage or prevent any damage. But once the damage had been done, then the harness wouldn't do any good. But now that you have the harness, a new airflow sensor may solve the problem. So you're not going to address the laying on of hands mystery?

I mean, there's got to be... Is there not a technical explanation for when Padre opened... opens the hood and lays on the hands that everything is okay. Well, I'm sure there is. I mean, within minutes, father? It takes like 30 seconds. 30 seconds. I have to turn the car off and lay hands on it.

Yeah. Cursing over time. Yeah. Yeah, I think the, I think... Come on, father. I think the 30 seconds is the crucial component here. You do this in the middle of the freeway. It's bloody...

Scary. Yeah, when there's no little side parts to put the car. Yeah. See if you can get a Parisian to ride with you and let them try the laying on the hands. Tell them they're going to teach him the art of laying on hands. And make sure that you don't get out of the car on those busy freeways. It's safer to get out on the passenger side anyway. So you tell the passenger, you get out and open the hood, and I'll let you know if it works.

Yeah, great. As soon as it starts, you just leave him there by the side. Good luck, father. Good old. Thank you. Sure, bye. Bye, bye, bye. Hey, the puzzler answer and more calls are coming up right after this. Hi, we're back. You're listening to Car Talk with us, Click and Clack to Tappert Brothers,

and we're here to talk about cars, car repair, and the answer to last week's puzzler. But first, the question. Oh, yeah. The sparrow. It's coming back to me. Is there a big truck involved in a bridge? Yeah, yeah, yeah. You remember the story of the bridge of San Luis Ray by Thornton Wilder? I read it.

When did you read it? A couple of years ago. No, you read it when he first wrote it in 1937. I read the... I read the galley proofs. Well, this is the story of the bridge of Tom and Ray. In Borneo, there's a bridge connecting two islands that's constructed of bamboo lashed together with hemp. It's been used for hundreds of years.

Pedestrian traffic and vehicular traffic move in both directions, and the bridge is four miles long. I'm with you. I can see it now. Is the old picture painted? I can see four miles of hemp holding up people and things. And cars. Bamboo. Bamboo, yeah.

And the bridge has a weight limit of 20 tons. So one day a truck pulls up to the bridge and the official stop him and say, we have to weigh you because it looks like it's going to be close to the weight limit. So he drives onto the scale and the truck is full of sedated pigs, pig iron, and dead chickens. With the driver in the truck, it weighs exactly 20 tons. Man. What are the chances of that? are the chances. So the guy at the other end of the bridge gets the signal, he weighs all the other traffic

off the bridge. Clearly, if the weight limit's 20 tons, they can't allow anyone else on the bridge. No. So now the bridge is empty, and this fellow is allowed to drive across. As he is crossing the bridge, a sparrow begins to follow alongside. No! What are the chances of that? Then it begins to hover over the truck, flapping his wings.

And just when he's a little beyond... This sparrow hasn't had, like, chili for lunch. They have. And just when he's a little beyond the halfway point on the bridge, the sparrow gets ready to land and does land on the truck. What does the driver do to keep the truck and the sedated pigs and the dead chickens from plunging into the abyss? The abyss.

Or the four feet of water that's below there. Over the, under the bridge. Wow. What a great question. What does he do? What does he do? Not what happens, but what does the driver do? What can he do?

What can he do? He could do a lot of things. For example, figuring that his shoe weighs more than a sparrow, he could throw a shoe out of the window. Yeah. Or he could jettison something else. Yeah. But he needn't do anything.

Wow. Trick question. What does he do? He does nothing. Because in driving from the beginning of the bridge, to the halfway point, a 20-ton truck is going to what? Consume fuel.

And it'll easily consume an amount of fuel that's greater than the weight of the sparrow. So when the sparrow lands on the truck, nothing happens. Oh, man. Do we have a winner? And you know what I would have done? I would have been already diving out the truck window

into the abyss. Exactly. Oh, man. The winner is Dave May from Cedar Falls, Iowa. and for having his correct answer selected at random from the thousands of correct answers that we got. Dave is going to get a $25 gift certificate to the Car Talk Shameless Commerce Division on our website, with which he can get a copy of our new book in our humble opinion, which last time we checked was rapidly climbing the New York Times list of books to avoid at all costs,

even if they're given away free. Good work, Dave. We'll have a new... While you were reading... I saw you reading paper. is there? Well, I'm trying to figure out which puzzle to you today. Oh, because you're going to say we're going to have a new something puzzler coming up in the third half. I haven't figured it else. We'll have a new puzzler coming up in the third half of today's show. It may be automotive in nature. And it may not.

And it may not, which is about the only two possibilities there are. So stay tuned for that. In the meantime, call and ask us questions about your car. The number is 888-car talk. That's 888-2-27-82-5. A lawyer on car talk. Hi, this is Zach from Philadelphia. Zach? Yep. Hi, Zach. With an H? With an H.

Sure. What's shaking? I have an 87 Toyota Camry four-door, four-cylinder, and I got it from my grandmother for a buck a year ago. Uh-huh. Did you do this while she was in some Alzheimer's stupor? No. Hey, Grammy, I'll give you a buck for your car. She said, okay, sonny.

But I don't have any more birthday presents for the rest of my life. Right. As a matter of fact, I think I still. lower the buck. I don't know what's going to be happening with that. I got it with 50,000 miles on it, and now it has 70,000 miles on it. Yeah. The problem is when I first got it, I noticed it was a lack of power, and it actually

felt like my grandmother was still driving the car. So I looked under the hood, and I found that one of the cylinders or the spark plug covers was a little bit raised off of the spark plug, and I looked inside it, pulled it out, looked inside of it, and there was oil covering the bottom of that, spark plug cover the wire. Right, right, right. And when I went to my mechanic, said he fixed that he cleaned out the oil, took the ring off, and I'll replace that little, he said there's little ring in there. There's a little, there were little four little O rings. Yeah, to replace that. Good. But when he did that, it ran better? Not really. I'm not so. I wouldn't have

expected it to run any better. Yeah, I'd never notice, like, wow, this is great power. I never really noticed that, plus the four-sill in the car. With an automatic transmission, too. Yeah. Now, the other situation, and I think it may go hand in hand, is that every time I start my car, doesn't matter if it's winter or summer, there's always a puff of smoke coming out of the exhaust. Blue. Bluey. And when you say there's a lack of power, how does it run it idle when you're sitting at a stop? It's not silent, but it runs fairly smoothly.

Right, you can feel a very slight vibration, but it's not. It would lead me to believe that it's not sinking up correctly. No, it's running on all four cylinders. The problem is the cylinders ain't big enough for you. And it may be that it's putting out as much power as it possibly can. Right. And you're just disappointed with it. What did you drive before this, if anything? An 83 accord, four-cylinder, but it was manual transmission.

Oh, yeah, and that would have more zip. Yeah, a little bit. It would have more zip with the stick shift. Mostly because of the stick shift. And it's probably a lighter car, too. Yeah. You know, so you're going to have to get used to it. I mean, you should ask this guy to check the timing.

The timing? Yeah. Okay. Because the timing could be off. I mean, there are a lot of other things that could be wrong with it. But what's up with any idea with the oil? Yeah, he put the o-rings in wrong. He put the o-rings.

Well, I didn't put him in wrong, but he didn't tighten. There were four big nuts on the top of the valve cover. Right. And that's what holds the valve cover down and squashes those o-rings between the cylinder head and the tube. Right. And if he didn't tighten those enough, they would leak. So if he fixed this twice, then it's time to go someplace else? Well, it's time to tighten him up some more.

Maybe he was afraid to over-tighten him. Okay. You know, but you can ask him to tighten them. It's not a big deal. You can have oil in there. and it won't impair the performance of the engine. That's what I was curious about. Yes, well, that's why I said I would be surprised if, when he did that, it ran better

because there's nothing there that make it run back. Yeah, there's always the off chance that Grammy knew what was wrong with this car, which is waiting for a sucker to come along. Exactly. And their highest offer before you showed up was 75 cents. Exactly, exactly. Don't worry about it, Zach. Okay, thanks, man.

I appreciate it. See you. Bye-bye. So-bye. 1-8-88-car talk. That's 888-227-8-8-25. Hello, you're on Car Talk. Hi, this is Gretchen, calling from Breckenridge, Colorado.

Hi, Gretchen. How are you? We're great. Breckenridge, Colorado? Yes. About an hour and a half west of Denver in the mountains. Yeah, what's shaken? Well, I'm calling.

I have a 95 Mercury stable, and it has about 85,000 miles on it. Yeah. I moved out to Colorado last summer from Michigan, and the day that I drove it into the mountains, my car proceeded to die on me. Any time that I went over any sort of a pass. That means when you were climbing a mountain. Yeah, when I was climbing a mountain. How about when you reached the top?

Yeah, it would die then. How about when you were coming down the mountain? Coming down was fine. Uh-huh. And the other time, as in warmer weather, it was in the summer going into the city and not going on any passes at all, but in stop and go traffic and warm weather, and I would usually have my air on.

Uh-huh. I took it in the first time that it happened last summer. Uh-huh. They did a complete diagnostic check on it on the computer system. I thought so. Yeah. And found what? Nothing registered.

Right. And I'm afraid they couldn't figure it out because they were looking at the wrong thing. Okay. And I'm going to ask you a question, and it would be wonderful, Gretchen. Yes. And might be worth considerable cash. If your answer was yes. If you're driving the car or even if you stop, but the engine is running.

Right. Do you hear a humming noise coming from the rear of the car? Think hard now. Do everything in your power. Think hard. Now, you might be able to intuit the answer. I know. I think the answer is going to be.

I really want to say yes. Well, good for you. All right. But I can't, I really can't recall that noise. It may be that it is sneaked up on you. Uh-huh. And lots of times things happen and you don't even know they're happening. So let's assume, at least, for the moment.

For the sake of argument, that in fact, Gretchen's car has this humming noise. Okay. And then we'll get back to it. Right. By sitting in the back seat. Okay. And if you sit in the back seat with the engine running, you may hear a... Mm-hmm.

Okay. Which shouldn't be there. And what I think is wrong with your car is you have a weak fuel pump. Okay. And that would explain why you lose power, especially on the hills. All the classic symptoms of a bad fuel pump, which they would never find on their stupid little computer because the computer is telling them about other stuff. Well, it doesn't check the fuel pump either. Now, you're going to tell us that they tested the fuel pump.

I am. I know. I have a little bit of history here I forgot to reveal. Yeah, okay. Okay. This did happen in Michigan once right before I left. Ah. Same situation sitting.

My mom was driving. It was in park. It was a really hot day, and it died. Ah. And then, to preface this, I also, I'd had a fuel pump, a brand-new fuel pump put in two summers ago. Oh, Gretchen, Gretchen. Okay. So, and I mean...

Well, the first instance with your mother, could well have been the fuel pump. It could also have been vapor lock. Okay. But I don't think it was. was. Now that's what people have been telling me around here. But I'm trying to, well, here's what you do. That's the other possibility. To put all, all the speculation to rest, I think you need to have someone test the fuel pump with a long test. In other words, if they just put the tester on there and run the car for a minute, they may in fact determine that the fuel

pressure is okay. Okay. But if they let the thing run and get good and hot on a hot day, you may see the pressure dropping as time goes on. And they can also do a volume test because there is a specification for how much volume the pump should pump. And I suspect you're going to find that the pump is no good. Okay. I have to say that even though you threw in that little red herring about your mother, that I don't like the vapor lock idea. I don't think it has anything to do with vapor lock.

And I'm sticking with my brother's analysis here, a diagnosis of the fuel pump. Okay. And I think you've just tried to obfuscate this entire situation, Gretchen, and don't call us again. And you won't be on stumped, chumps. See you, Gretchen. All right. Thanks very much. Hey, thanks for calling Gretchen.

You've been a lot of fun. Thank you very much. Even though you gave all the wrong answers. Yeah, and the wrong questions. So, see you. Bye. Bye, bye, bye. We'll be right back with more calls and the new puzzler after these messages.

Ha, we're back. You're listening to Car Talk with us. Wake me up like that. You're listening to Car Talk with us, Click and Clack the Tappert Brothers, and we're here to discuss cars, car repair, and the new puzzler. This was submitted by Ross Sukashima. He says, a friend of mine used to work at a Ford Assembly plant, and he told me the following story. A new model came out, and like anything, there were a few design bugs that needed to be worked out.

I have to add parenthetically that this was a while ago. Okay. Amongst these problems was one really strange one. One out of every six cars delivered to a dealership would have a dead battery. The engineers at Ford were perplexed. They did circuit tests for short circuits. None were found. They did extensive lot testing on incoming batteries to see if one out of every six was a problem right from the manufacturer.

And guess what? No. No problems. Perfect. They hired specialists and consultants, crystal ball readers and the like. Tarot cards. Experts on batteries and chemicals to try to pinpoint the problem. They could find none.

For three months the problem existed, and for three months the problem stayed exactly the same. One out of every six cars had a dead battery upon arrival at the distributor. Wow. He says, my friend was a quality control engineer and decided to take action and take things into his own hands. He walked the entire assembly plan talking to the workers as he went. He started out in components, wound up in the cafeteria, then went through chassis and electrical and followed the line all the way to final test. Without fail, each car would start up at the end and be driven away.

There were no dead batteries at final test. He was stumped. He watched the cars being loaded for shipment and then turned around to talk to the guy in charge of final test. He asked him if there were ever any dead batteries at final test, and he said, no, never. Wow. He then explained to the tester, the situation, and asked him if he could think of a reason why one out of six batteries were always dead on this particular model. the guy stared off into the distance. He pondered.

He scratched his butt. And then he smiled, and he said he knew what the problem was. Really? And my friend later checked and confirmed that the guy in final test was absolutely correct. What was the problem? This was from the old days. How old? I mean, we're talking just a few decades, not a hundred years ago.

No, no, just a few decades ago. I'll give you a hint, when cars were. Big. Yeah. Big. You got it? You got it? With me?

If you think you know the answer, write it on a postcard. Or on the back of an original oil on canvas Pablo Picasso, complete with a litigating documents. And send it to. We haven't been getting any of this stuff. No, the Carpathian Elm Burrell dining room set. Never arrived. Never showed. Oh, Berman says that's what you think.

Anyway, if you want, send all that to Puzzler Tower, Car Talk Plaza, Box 35. 500, Harvard Square, Cambridge. Our Fair City. Matt 02238. Or you can email your answer from the Car Talk section of Cars.com. If you'd like to call us, as always, the numbers, 1-888-8-8-2-2-7-82-55. Hello, you're on Car Talk. Hi, guys.

Hi. Yeah. I am Steve from Alexandria, Virginia. But I almost feel like I should say that I live in the Pentagon because that is where my car problem arises. Your car problems started in the Pentagon, or? Well, let me explain. First of all, it's a 1989 Honda Civic, about 135,000 miles. The problem I have is this.

I work in Alexandria about 10 miles from the Pentagon, and for over a year now, I got it. A couple of times a week, I drive after work to the Pentagon, and I park in one of their parking lots, which connects to the subway that I can take to Washington, to go to a basketball game, a hockey game. Four or five hours later, when I come back, every time I start the engine, the check engine light comes on.

And you suspect some scalduggery. I can't pronounce that word as well as you can, but yeah, I suspect that and other nefarious things. You're not a lawyer or a politician, are you? I am one of the two. I am a lawyer. Well, then we can't talk to you. We know exactly what's wrong with the car.

But is there anything different when you drive to the Pentagon parking lot? Is that a significant deviation from what you usually do? Is it a much greater distance? Ten miles versus, say, five miles. Steve. Well, you know, I mean, I know the answer you're looking for. Yeah. Yeah.

That there are some peculiar electromagnetic radiations. We know that there are, right? Or where else, if not there? I always feel like leaving notes on other cars in the parking. I like it. You guys don't believe me, right? No, of course not. We know you made it up.

The guy tells us he's a lawyer, and then he says you don't believe me, do you? Are your lips moving? And the car works fine, so I just ignore the light. I think it has something to do with you. You ready for this? I know the answer. I happen to know the answer, and I'll have to divulge it. It has to do with moisture in the air.

Boister in the air. Yeah. And a huge parking lot where it's just, you know, radiation. Why is that different from this driveway? Huh? Huh? Must live in a dry area in Alexandria. Where is the car now, Steve?

It's actually in the parking lot where I work. Where you work. Doesn't happen during the day. How far away from you is it? I think I may have to do a little incantation for it. I'm looking forward to doing this for so long. No, I think it's a unique combination of driving the next. extra 10 miles, parking it, and then coming back to it that same night.

Okay. And it's not the equivalent of... You're not watching Jane Leno and going out and starting the car up. It's different. Why? It's the same thing. He says he goes out. He's watching Jane Leno.

Hasn't driven as far. Hasn't driven as far. And I think you have a bad oxygen sensor. Bad oxygen sensor. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. And I would cause that light to go on. No. No. Yeah, it could. But it impresses me. I'm going to do the incantation. I think that might be more helpful.

I think I'm going to do it, and hopefully, and we can even do this, another stump the chance. We can see if the incantation works. When's the next basketball game? What, the season's over. It's over for weeks. Especially for the team in Washington. Yeah, we know that.

How often does it happen? Once or twice a week. Once or twice a week? All right. That's easy to test. I'm going to do the... What color is the car? beige, but I think technically they call it a gold.

Gold, and is it two-door or four-door? It's a hatchback, two-door. Two-door hatchback. And which way is it facing now? North, southeast or west? South. South. Okay, that's all I need to know.

Ready? Are you ready? Do I have to... No, you don't have to do anything? You have fuzzy dice anywhere in the car? It would be good if you closed your eyes. Do I have to hold onto my wallet? Hold your nose.

Close your eyes and raise your hands out in front of you, palms down. Try to repeat after me if you can because you'll be my channel to the car. Ready? Highway, Hawaii, that's it. That's it. That's it. It's fixed. I can feel it. Maybe that'll help the basketball team team.

It'll never happen again. It's fixed. Steve, when they can't come up with a code, have them test the oxygen. This may even have two oxygen sensors of this car. But have them test the oxygen. oxygen sensor output. And when they say, oh, it's no good, you'll have solved the problem. Okay.

See you, Steve. Thank you very much. Bye-bye. Well, it's happened again. You've wasted another perfectly good hour listening to Car Talk. Our esteemed producer is Doug the subway fugitive, not a slave to fashion. Cute, cute, cute, cute, Berman. Our associate producers are frau Catherine Fenalosa and Louis Cronin the Barbarian.

Our engineer is George Hicks. Our senior web lackey is Doug the old gray mare. and our technical, spiritual, and menu advisor now training for the European summer free lunch open is John Bugsy Lawler. Our public opinion pollster was Paul Murky of Merkey Research, assisted by statistician Marge and Overa. Marge and Overa. I caught it. Our customer care representative is Haywood Jabuzov. Our director of new product repair is warranty my foot, and our shop foreman is Luke Busy.

Our pseudonym consultant is Norm Deplum. Our dermatologist for teenagers is Don Pickett. Our staff tax preparer is Lionel Little. Our emergency room physician is Henrietta Bad Clam. And our seat cushion tester is Mike Easter. Our chief counsel from the law firm of Dewey Cheatham and How is U. Louis Dewey, known to the tenured bums in Harvard Square as Ui Louie Dewey. Thanks so much for listening.

We're clicking and clack to Tappert Brothers. And above all, don't drive like my brother. And secondly, don't drive like my brother. And don't drive like my brother. We'll be back next week. Bye-bye. And now, here is the first. Car Talk Plaza's chief mechanic, Mr. Vinnie Gumatz.

Thank you very much. Now, if you start out there, want a copy of this here show, which is number 25, you can get one on the web. Just head on over to the online store at the Cart Talk section of Cars.com. That's good. What if somebody wanted something else, you know, like the new book?

I mean, we've got a new book, in our humble opinion. Would I go to that same site, Vinnie, to do that? No, you dope. You go to www. Brittany Spearsfor-president.com. Of course you go to the same site. The Card Talk section at Cars.com or you'll order the old-fashioned way by phone.

You know, you call 8-8-8-Gar junk. Thank you, Vinny. That was Tour de Force. Hey, force this, will you? Car Talk is a production of Dewee Cheatham and Howe and WBUR in Boston. And even though Daniel Shaw wonders whether he should have listened to his mother and become a doctor after all, whatever he hears us say it, this is NPR National Public Radio.