The Best of Car Talk - #2633: Hacker Heaven

Episode Date: April 25, 2026

Larry’s 14-year-old kid wants the two of them to find an old car to rebuild so kiddo can drive it when he gets his license in a few years. What a great father/son bonding experience, right? You’d think our two hosts -who used to run a DIY repair shop years ago- might be all for it, but maybe not. Find out what Click and Clack think on this episode of the Best of Car TalkSee pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for sponsorship and to manage your podcast sponsorship preferences.NPR Privacy Policy

Hello and welcome to Car Talk from National Public Radio with us, Click and Clack the Tappert Brothers, and we're broadcasting this week from the Department of Foreign Language Translation here at Car Talk Plaza. Somebody named Dave Newton from Thousand Oaks, California sent us this handy little translation guide, which he pulled off the internet, which means what? He stole it. Yeah, well, and we don't know who the author is, but people will write to us and tell us. They always do.

Well, this is sort of in the spirit of our never-ending effort to keep harmony and good relationships. Domestic harmony. Domestic harmony, that's it. Yeah. I mean, what it says here is wife speak and English equivalent, which means your wife says this, and here's what it really means. Okay. And I just picked out a few here. One is, we need, and what that means is, I want.

Ah, yeah, we need. She says you're so manly, which means in English, you need to shave and a shower. This kitchen is kind of inconvenient, which means I want a new house. That's how your wife started. There wasn't this kitchen a little, those kitchen's a little small, isn't it? No, dark. Dark. If she says no, it means no.

If she says maybe, it means. it means no. If she says, sure, it means no. And here are a couple of, if you say to her, what's wrong, if she says nothing, it means everything. Oh, everything. Everything. If she says nothing really, it means just that you're a complete jerk.

I this is Dave Newton I don't know who wrote this Why is it that I knew all the answers already Well so did I What is that mean? Well it means we're tuned into our wives Well we've just heard the same thing over and over and over again That it's finally sunk in what they really mean

Well I mean someone knew it enough to write it down So maybe it's just common knowledge And the only people who don't know it are the boars and Yahoo's Not sensitive men of the thousands of the zero-zero's as we are. We're going to have a tough time for the next couple of decades. Yeah, saying zero-zero-zero. The zeros and the tens.

Zero's in the ten. Well, the tens is the teens. The teens, yeah. That will be all right. But the zeros. The zeros. Nothing's going to happen for at least ten years. Well, nothing we can refer to.

Right. Nothing of... Oh, no, we'd be able to say, I remember back an aught six. Art-six. Art-six. But I don't know what the whole decade will be known. But that's going to be a problem for you, because you're going to remember two-aut-six. Anyway, if you'd like to translate your car speak for you, call us at 888 Car Talk.

That's 888-225. Hello, you're on Car Talk. Hi, this is Andrea from Dublin, California. Hi, Andrea. How are you? I'm doing great. And where's Dublin? Dublin is just east of San Francisco, about 50 miles east of San Francisco.

Oh, really? Really? Beautiful Bay Area. Is it just past, are you ready for this? Is it just past Hayward? You got a lot. Do I know my geography? You do, don't I?

All right. I have a 92 at Accurant Integra. It has 120,000 miles on it. It's a couple of a little over a turn a corner or change lanes on the freeway and go over the freeway bumps. I hear like a rattling in the steering column. And at first it sounded like just metal kind of clashing together. Yeah. And my friend Mary, she said it sounds like a bike chain rattling in either the dash or the steering column.

Are you missing a bike? No, no, I have a bike and it's got a chain on it. You hit a bump and you hear once or continuous. Yeah, it rattles quickly and as soon as I smooth out of the bump, it stops. And it sounds like it's coming right out of the dashboard. Or the steering column. Yeah. Is it something to be concerned?

concerned about? Yeah. Uh-oh. Uh-oh. Uh-oh. What do you think it is? How concerned should she be? Well, I don't think it's really something that's going to cause you bodily harm.

What I think it is, and your car is just the right age to have a broken stabilizer link. Broken stabilizer link. Yeah, which is right under the dashboard. They stabilize the radio. It is behind the dashboard, but it's about three feet away. But travel, sounds travel. Sounds travel. And what you think is coming from behind the dashboard is actually coming from either the right front or left front or both front wheels.

From the front wheel. And the stabilizers are little bolts with a bunch of rubber, thick rubber grommets that go between the stabilizer. and the lower control arm. Okay. And when one of them breaks, it can cause the stabilizer part of it to bang against the other part when you go over bumps. And also to interfere with the axle so that when you do that when you're going, you're driving along and you hit a bump, the broken piece of the stabilizer will actually hit the axle and go, for a few seconds and then go away.

And the rest of the time, you hear nothing. Exactly. This is brilliant, isn't it, Andrea? So what is it going to cost me? Oh, cheap. Short money. Short money. As we say.

Yeah. Short money. Yeah. You probably need both of them replaced. And of course... Yes. They're just on the front. And while they have it up in the air, they're going to discover that you need brakes, ball joints, a muffler.

Tie rod ends, everything. Yeah. But basically, a broken stabilizer link on both. Which is going to cost you, the short money is going to be $1,000. Are you serious? No, no. I mean, it should cost you $100, but it may end off costing you a $1,000. thousand when they find all the other things wrong with your car.

And, of course, it's time for another timing belt and all that. I would see $1,600.80. I'm glad you called. I didn't have my timing belt replaced. But you're going to need all this stuff, and a lot of it is safety-related, and you will thank us for saving your life, even though it's going to... Well, that's why I'm calling. I just want to keep ignoring it.

No, that's right. And your wife is worth at least $1,600. I hope so. Yeah, sure. Okay, well, I appreciate your help. I enjoy listening to you guys. Thanks, Andrew. Thanks for calling.

Bye. Bye. One 8888 Car Talk. That's 8882278-8-2-55. Hello, you're on Car Talk. Hi, this is Tom. How you doing? Tom.

Where you're from, Tom? Trenton, New Jersey. Trenton. You know, I was in Trenton just the other day. No kidding. And I was standing on the train, the Amtrak platform. Okay. And I struck up a conversation with a guy next day.

Yeah, it was the basis of it was this. Got any spare change? That was the kind of conversation. you'd have at the Trenton Railroad Station. But he said, I used, after we started talking, he said, I used to live in Trenton, and I never come back here if I don't have to, because it is the worst city in the country. Oh, that's mean. Yeah, I'm just, I'm just telling you what the guy said.

He said, I moved out of Trenton when I got mugged five days in a row. Oh, God. The poor guy came home from work, five contiguous days, and every night, on his one, way home from work, somebody beat him up and took his money. You know the Trenton's wallet? Because of the second day, he didn't have a wallet anymore. Anybody's been to his understreet. You know the Trenton used to be the capital of the United States? Yep.

Get out of here. It was. It was for a short period of time. A week. They mugged everyone and they left. All right. So if you have a serious question, come on. We're killing valuable time here. And nobody won't visit Trenton now for the next 20 years.

What's up, Tom? Well, I drive a 1994 Honda del Sol, SI. Yeah. It's got 102,000 miles on it. About six months ago, the car had been sitting in my driveway for about a week. My wife and I were away on vacation. And I got in the car to start the car up to go to work and nothing. Battery's dead.

It's not doing anything. So I called somebody to give me a jump. Got it. Started up fine. So I took the car to the dealer because I was concerned that maybe there was a problem with the battery. And sure enough, the battery was gone. It was dead. They replaced the battery, and I went on my merry way.

About a week and a half later, I'm driving to work, and my engine light comes on. So, call the dealer. Brought the car down. Yeah, yeah. You need. He said your ECU is bad, which, yeah, exactly. Bummer. That's the car's computer for those that don't know.

The economic control unit. Well, the price of the part is about $1,200. And then with the labor, it's probably $1,500. He also said these things don't go bad very often. He said it's very rare. That's true. I think we've replaced one Honda computer in forever. Okay, right.

And it started making me think, is it possible that getting the car jumped could have done something to the ECU, even though it didn't show up as bad until a week and a half later? Well, see, the mind is a terrible thing. I know, isn't it? More importantly, is it possible that you can blame this on somebody else and get your $1,500 back? People at work thought that's the reason why I was going to call. And I really, it's really not. It's just educational.

Right. Well, certainly if you hook up the cables backward, you can cook everything on any car. Certainly you could cook the computer. Usually, if you do that, if you hook the cables up incorrectly, the car won't start. It may even catch fire. Something will usually blow up. So there's a definite sign that they did it wrong. Usually.

Yeah. I mean, you were there when who jumped the car, AAA or some garage? Well, it was somebody that AAA, you know, somebody that works with. And you were there. I was there. I watched them do it. You watched them do it. You turned the key and the car started right up. Right up. And how soon after that did the light come on? About a week and a half later.

I doubt they're related. So you don't think they're related. Almost impossible. Mm-hmm. So I don't think this guy did anything wrong to your car. I think it was just bad luck. Yeah. Yeah, and it runs all right now.

It's good. It runs fine. It's a great car. It's got 102,000 miles on it. Yeah. Don't go away anymore. One safer thing to do, by the way, for anyone who has a dead battery, is to actually disconnect the battery before you charge it.

Oh. Okay. It's not really jump starting. So if your battery were dead, you could take the battery out. You don't have the car towed to a gas station. They would disconnect the cables from the battery. and just charge up the battery. And then when the battery is charged,

they would disconnect the charger and hook your cables back up, and there's no risk whatsoever then. And that's the safest thing to do. I think. Now, if you had somebody come and give you a jump, would they be able to do that as well? No.

Unless you wanted to spend... No, they couldn't. No. Cables would have to be connected. If you wanted to spend the morning with them and have a latte and brioche. Right. You know. But those guys don't do latte and brioch.

So that's really the best way to do it. That's the safest way. Just connect the battery and have it charged. But I wouldn't worry about it. I mean, what are the chances that could happen again? That's the kind of thing I worry about. Say you. Good luck, Tom.

Thanks a lot, don't worry. Bye-bye. Appreciate it. All righty. Wait, minute. If the truck drivers don't do latte embryos, what do they do? They do, like, Miller High Life at 7 o'clock in the morning? Well, I don't know what they do, but I don't think latte and brioche is included.

1-8-88-car-taught-old. Is that some kind of a blanket derogatory statement about tow truck? No, it's just an observation. I mean, anything by it? It's just a sweeping generalization. We're not alienated enough people? Well, tow truck drivers, never mind. You have to screw up to tow truck drivers, too.

Yeah, you know, you ought not to mess with them. Don't mess with them. That's like the guy at McDonald's. Yeah. Funny man. All right, Tommy, now that summer's here, your memory must be warming up. Do you happen to remember last week's puzzler? I don't think my memory's up to operating temperature.

You know what you mean? A blockhead heater. Hi, we're back. You're listening to Car Talk with us. Click and Clack the Tappert Brothers. And we're here to talk, of course, about cars, car repair, and the answer to last week's puzzler. Okay, go ahead.

Anyway, this came from Rob, somebody or other, who used to work for applied logic because that's what his email address says. And I'd say used to because I'm sure he's since been fired for writing personal email on company time. Of course. Anyway, he writes, My wife owns a 92 Olds Achiever with a quad four engine

five-speed manual transmission and power everything. One morning, as she's headed to work, she comes back into the house and says her car won't start. I go out and listen as she tries to start the car and Zippo, not even a click. She's in a hurry, so she takes my car. So I put the battery charger on her car, and later in the day, I go out and I start it right up.

I drive it around a bit to charge the battery, everything's fine. The next day, the exact same thing happens. She turns the key, Zippo, I visit a website and I find instructions for determining if there's a drain on the battery and all that. I do the test. I find out there's no drain. So I go out and buy a new battery and put it in. Same problem.

So we push the car out of the garage and I jump it with my car. I turn the key and it starts right up. Yeah. And I drive her car to the dealership and she follows in my car. Hours later, they say they can't find the problem. So we leave it there overnight, figuring this is an overnight problem. The next day, my wife gets in with her keys, turns out of her. the key and it won't start at the dealership, even though they said it was all right.

At which point I asked her, did you just buy something for your car? She says, yes. And the question is, what did she buy that was preventing her from starting the car? I have to say that you obfuscated this one really beautifully. Well, I didn't. I mean, Rob did. You helped. A little bit.

You helped. Yeah, no, it's well. done. Very well done. In fact, I will say that you did throw in a hint toward the end there that was unnecessary. I did? You said she got in the car again with her keys and you didn't have to say that. You just said she got in the car and it wouldn't start. Oh, see, you could have been even more. I really obfuscated it because you got the wrong answer. Great. It was a red herring. What she had bought for her car on Rob's applied logic. Let me guess. Air freshener.

Floor mats. Floor mats. Yes, way back in the beginning, like about an hour ago. I mentioned that she had an old achiever with a quad four engine and a five-speed manual transmission. And because she has a manual transmission, she has attached to her clutch pedal. You didn't mention that she was short. I didn't mention that she was short. That would have been the hit.

Unnecessary. She has a starter inhibit switch, and that is a switch located on the clutch pedal. which prevents the starter from engaging unless the pedal is depressed all the way to the floor. Right. And when she put the carpet in, the new rugs in, it prevented her from pushing the thing far enough down. But when Manly Rob, who works, did I mention for Applied Logic? Used to. Used to work for Applied Logic.

Got in with his big legs. He had no trouble mashing this pedal to the floor. And it was the case, the guys at the dealership didn't have a problem either. Neither. Neanderthals. Right. Lucky they didn't go right through the floor. And when it didn't start, they just pushed a pedal even harder. Sure.

And the new floor, so all she had to do was cut a piece off of the floor mat or pull it back a little bit, and voila, the car started. All the hints were there. I think it's great. And Rob has a new career in the floor mat sales now. Installation. I think it's great. And who's our winner? The winner is Charles Gruber.

From where? Shappley? Shapley, Maine. And for having his answer selected at random, from among all the answers that we got, Charles gets a $25 gift certificate to the car talk store in our website. Charles gets a measly $25 gift certificate to the car talk store on our website, with which he can get five, six. Are you ready for this? Of a Dewey Cheatham and Howe embroidered polo shirt. We leave off one sleeve.

Well, congratulations. Congratulations to you, buddy. Well, anyway, we'll have a new puzzle from the train series. The Amtrak collection. That puzzle will be coming up in the third half of today's show, so stay tuned for that if you'd like. In the meantime, you can call us and ask us questions about your car or anything else. The number is 8888-2-27-8255. Hello.

You know what that number is in binary? Have we ever used this? we have. I had it in here, one zero, zero, zero, one, one, one, one, one, zero, zero one, one, zero, one, one, zero one, one, one, one, one, one, call that number. On your digital phone, if you will. Hello, you're on car talk. My name is Larry.

I'm from San Diego. Hi, Larry. How are you doing? I'm doing good. I was wondering if you could help me. I have a 14-year-old son who is thinking about driving. and he's saying, you know, Dad, let's buy a car and fix it up so that when I become a driving age, I'll have something to drive.

Pretty hard to say no to that, isn't it? I mean, it's a father-son project. It's what every man thinks about when he has boys. You do. Some point the boys and I are going to restore an old Mustang. I know. I kind of want to break into a Monty Python song about... Tommy had that same dream except the...

the Mustang head hooves. Well, I know, it does sound like a great time, and then the reality of my mechanical and ebness and budget kind of comes to play, and that's where I was hoping you could help me out. Well, this is good. I think I should tell you about is, you know, one of his things that he likes to do,

he likes to surf, and so, you know, having something that he can drive places with and maybe camp in or sleep in the back, So what do you have in mind, Larry? What do I have in mind? Yeah. Stalling. He'll get the job and buy his own car.

Well, I think the experience, you know, we think of the experience of this bonding as being the father and son working side by side, replacing brake lines and putting in new pads, new shoes, doing whatever it takes, and the father teaching the son. But that might not be the right lesson. Well, and it might require that you have something to teach. If you don't know anything, then... Well, that's the thing. Larry said he doesn't have any idea how to do this.

What do you do for a living, Larry? He's a computer programmer. I'm a biologist. Worse. Yeah. I actually... You're a marine biologist? No.

How unfortunate you live in San Diego. I mean... Go ahead. That's true. But I actually, you know, when I was in college, I actually had a VW Microbus, as you might like. Of course you did. I had a wonderful book called something like Volkswagen Repairs for the Complete Idiot.

Dummies. Yeah, well, they do have that same book now, except it's 27,000 pages. And that vehicle, that Volkswagen, was the only vehicle made, perhaps, that allowed that book to be written. Because it was a simple enough vehicle, and with rudimentary tools, you could add, and basic knowledge of physics. You could actually fix almost anything on that thing. Most cars aren't like that.

And, of course, the consequence of that was the car was a death trap. Right. You know, but... Which is why we pretty much ruled that particular car out. So that is out. Yeah. And any car that is made in the last couple of decades is going to be pretty much ruled out in terms of your being able to do much to it at all.

But because you live so close to Mexico, You have a unique opportunity to go down to Mexico and get your son a nice 57 ranchero. Oh, a ranchero. Yeah, now we're talking, huh? For those of you who don't know what a ranchero is, it's akin to the El Camino, which is basically a car that was cut off at the behind the front seat, and the back of which was a pickup truck kind of thing. Right.

So I think that should be. quest. I think you ought to go to Mexico for a few weekends and search out a ranchero. See that? Now, it turns out that the bonding experience is not, rather than being, replacing break lines and whatever else,

the bonding experience comes from the creativity involved in figuring out what to buy, trips to Mexico, who knows what else he'll learn on his way to Mexico. Never mind. Yeah. I like it. I say,

Go for it, Larry. Okay. That's the vehicle for him. His surfboard will fit in the back, and it'll be the coolest thing. When he sees it, he'll fall in love with it. Okay. See you, Larry. You're not going to do it, are you, Larry?

No, he's not going to do it, but that's all right. I mean, you did say thanks, and I know you're just being polite because you think we're nuts. Well, I knew that before I called. But just remember, it was my brother's idea, not mine. No, I actually think it's a pretty good idea. I knew that. And if we get it done, we'll send you a picture. I'd love to see.

All right. See you, Larry. Take it easy. Bye, bye. Bye, bye. Okay, our producer wants us to take a short break now and prepare for the rest of the show. He says it'll be better if we cram. He didn't say cram.

He said scramm. The rest of the show will be better if we scram. Oh, okay. We'll be back in a minute. Ha, we're back. You're listening to Car Talk with us, Click and Clack to Tapper Brothers, and we're here to discuss cars, car repair, and the new puzzler. Automotive in nature, folkloric? It's folkloric.

It's historic. It's... Lousy? It's locomotive in nature. Locomotive, but not automotive. Is it semi-automotive? Quasi? Automotive?

Yes, master. Yeah, go ahead. This came from someone named Tim Sullivan, and I don't know if the facts are correct, but the flavor of it is so good that it makes no difference if the particulars are right. And would it make any difference to the answer? Sure, of course.

He writes, years ago when railroad used steam locomotives, the Baltimore and Ohio Railroad, we remember well. The old B.O. Exactly. Had a busy freight line running south from Rochester, New York. Yeah. Okay. Hence the name Baltimore and Ohio, Rochester, New York. Well, you got to go through.

You got me? You with me so far? Yeah. Why do you have to go through? Never mind. He writes, a single locomotive of the 282 type, which has a locomotive, seen locomotives have two wheels in the front, which didn't do much of anything.

Yeah. Okay. Eight wheels behind those, which were the drivers, four in each side. Yeah. And then two wheels in the back, which didn't do much except support the weight. Hold up the train. They're holding up the train. Oh, really?

So that's how they refer to them as 282? Five minutes already. Two lead wheels, eight drivers and two trailers. wheels, could handle a train of 80 cars. Okay, a 282, 282, 80 cars. I've got that now. Okay. Fully loaded, of course.

Why would you bring them out empty and take them back? Well, sometimes you're empty, but most of the time they're full. But you're ready for this? Yeah. On this particular run, it couldn't make it with 60 cars. It had to have 80. Oh, I thought it was the other way around it. It couldn't make it with 60.

You had to have 59. Oh, no. Oh, no. It had to have 80. It had to have more cars. And the hint is there's something unusual about... Something south of Rochester. About the run between Rochester and wherever it was going.

Baltimore. Maybe Baltimore. Who knows? So it normally could figure that out. Now, if you think you know the answer, write it on a postcard or a complete set of 18. 169, Waterford Crystal, Rhone Valley Goblets. And send it to... Well packed. Put it in all that.

You can just write it on the box that you pack the... Packed the... Packed very, very carefully, because that stuff is very delicate. And send that answer to Puzzler Tower, Car Talk Plaza, Box 3,500, Harvard Square, Cambridge... Power Fis City. Matt 02238. Or you can email your answer from the Car Talk section of Cars.com. if you'd like to call us the numbers 1-8-88-car talk.

That's 88, 82, 27, 82-55. Hello, you're on Car Talk. I am Randy, and I'm calling from McCall, Idaho. From Idaho? From Idaho. Idaho. Do you end your name with an I or a Y? With an I.

Cool. So what's shaking, Randy? Well, nothing's shaken, but it sure is smoking. I have a 96 Ford F-2. 50 diesel. Wow. This is my everyday rig. Really?

We have horses and mules, and I need to drive a vehicle that I can haul either a trailer with or hay with, you know, et cetera, et cetera. Gotcha. And I've had it since September of last year. I bought it with 74,000 miles on it, and it has 90,000 now. And my problem is that it smokes like a house on fire when I started up. First thing in the morning. Is it worse in colder weather?

The colder it is, the darker the smoke. Because you didn't drive it for the first 74,000 miles, I'm afraid that whoever did didn't change the oil enough. Well, you know, I spoke with the gentleman who had my vehicle. Oh, you know him. And he promised me that he changed the oil every 3,000 miles. I don't believe him. I believe him.

No, no. I don't believe him. People in Idaho. They don't lie, yeah, that's true. It's not like the East man. Not like these. People out there tell the truth. They're honest.

They have that pioneer mentality. But it means more work for us. Because the obvious reason for it smoking is that the oil wasn't changed during those first 74,000 miles. And if we're going to believe Clem, then we're going to have to come up with a different answer. Yes. The reason I think it's smoking, obviously, is that the compression is low. And because a diesel relies on the heat of compression to combust the fuel, it's incomplete combustion that's causing the smoke.

They have to do a compression test. Okay. Because that's going to tell you all. And if, in fact, the compression is low, then whether Clem changed the oil is irrelevant, you will need to have the engine rebuilt. Wait, wait, did he say he changed the oil every 3,000 miles or at 3,000 miles? He may have only changed it at. Just once.

Just one time. Yeah, the word. Call him back. The wording is crucial here. I'll bet if you call him back. He's unlisted. So have a compression desk done because that's going to tell you everything. Should I sell my truck?

No, you should fix it. I should fix it. Well, it's almost brand new. I mean. And it's exactly what you need. It's exactly. And no matter what it costs you to. to fix it, it's going to be cheaper

than buying a new one. Okay. Plus, if you sell it, you're going to have to lie to somebody. Right. And if you become a liar, you can't live in Idaho. That's right. They'll kick me out, won't they? You'll have to move

to Fall River, Massachusetts. Or Boston. Oh, God. You have to move back east. Because the liars are I know where she's going to move. Washington, D.C. There you go. There are a lot of liars there. Well, maybe you could be, get elected senator from Idaho, and then

You can have your cake and eat it too. Oh, don't even start with the... We won't. No, we won't. We could do a whole show on that alone. Don't get me started, Randy. Don't get me started. See you, Randy.

Good luck. Thanks, guys. Bye. Bye. Bye. 1-888-8-2-27. 8255. Hello, you're on car talk. Hi, guys.

This is Greg from Washington, D.C. Hi, Greg. What a coincadink, as we say. Are you a liar or a truth teller? Oh, I am an absolute truth teller. I work for the government. Okay. What portion of the government?

What branch? Well, the branch is very important here. I work for the State Department. Oh. And my question relates to that. I'm about to go overseas to Yeravan Armenia, where they have no unleaded gas, and I'm shipping my 2000 Nissan Xterra. I wouldn't do that. You wouldn't do that.

Well, unfortunately, I think it's already on the ship. Well, how long will you be there? Two years. Two years, and then I'll be overseas somewhere else. But won't you have, as we say, in the... Diplomatic community? The civilian world. A company car?

Not exactly. No, I'm afraid the bottom of the heap. We don't get anything like that. This is my first assignment. How much will you drive? Do you have any idea? Not too terribly much, I don't think, but there's usually a shipping company who will remove the catalytic converter for us. But on post-1996 Nissan trucks, he won't touch them.

He says the whole converter system runs throughout almost the entire exhaust system, that it would be removing three-quarters of the entire exhaust system. Oh, you know why this must have more than one converter? I think that's what he was saying, that it's some kind of pre-converter and then something else. But now advice from my neighbor, and I believe what he says, because he can keep a jaguar running by himself. Oh, he's a genius. That's what I think. He said what you can do then is just cut it, cut it open, get to where you can get a straight shot at the converter at those screens inside.

And broom handle it out. And broom handle it out, exactly. Yeah. You're going to have to do exactly what this guy said. Uh-huh. You're going to have to broom handle out the honeycomb. Uh-huh. Really?

Yeah. And then should that, the other warning that we got is that that might damage the oxygen sensors. Oh, you're going to unplug the oxygen sensors. You won't be using them. You'll use the little piece of black tape on the dash. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, you know, you could refuse shipment of the Xtero when it gets there.

You could say, what Xterra? No, then they'll sell it to somebody. No, they'll just send it back. However, when you do disable this thing by broom handling out the honeycomb, you are going to incur a huge expense probably on the order of a few thousand bucks when you return stateside. That I already knew. And is there any other part of the engine that I'm going to be damaging with this? I do. I do broom handle it out.

Am I going to ruin my engine all into the whole thing? Yeah, but an engine isn't much more expensive than the converters. You buy one of those two. And you probably aren't going to do any damage to anything else. Okay. Right. And somewhere that you're going to go, they're probably going to blow up your car anyway. Thanks, good.

And if you're lucky, it'll be like just before you have to come home. Well, terrific. Thank you very much. Say you, Greg. Bye-bye. Hi. Well, it's happened again. You've wasted another perfectly good hour listening to Carthoff.

I certainly have. Oh, listening. Our esteemed producer has dug the subway fugitive, not a slave to fashion. Cute, cute, cute, Berman. Our associate producers are frau, Catherine Pickle Fenalosa. And Louis Cronin, the Barbarian.

Our engineer is George Hicks. We'll slow in the uptake, George. Our senior web lackey is Doug the old gray mare and our technical spiritual and menu advisor. Still celebrating his Tour de Fork victory is John Bugsy Lawler.

Toad the Fork. Our public opinion poster is Paul Murky of Merkey Research, assisted by statistician Marge and Overa. Our customer care representative is Haywood Jabezov. Our director of new product repair is warranty my foot, and our shop foreman is Luke Busy. Our pseudonym consultant is Norm De Plum. Our dermatologist for teenagers is Don Pickett.

Our Japanese chef is Benny Honda, and our staff tax preparer is Lionel Little. The Car Talk musical director is Donna E. Mobile. Our divorce attorney is Carmine, not yours, and our seat cushion tester is Mike Easter. And, of course, as always, our Russian chauffeur is beak off and drop off. Our chief counsel from the law from a duie Jean-in-Hawaz-U-Lew-Lewis-Douy. known to the pigeons with digestive problems in Harvard Square as Ui Louis Dooy. Remind me to tell you a story about that. Thanks so much for listening.

We're clicking and clack to Tabbert Brothers and Don't Drive Like My Brother. And Don't Drive Like My Brother. We'll be back next week. Bye-bye. And now we're here is Car Talk Plaza's chief mechanic, Mr. Vinnie. Gumbach. Hey, thank you very much. You know, if you want a copy of this year's show, which is number 27, you can get one on the web.

Just head on over to the Shameless Commerce Division online at the Car Talk. section of cars.com. And what if I wanted something else, Vinnie? I mean, what if I wanted like a car talk t-shirt or the new book that we just wrote in our humble opinion? Would I go to that same site or what? No, you dope. You'd go to

www. Vladimir Putin in bikinshore.com. What are you, a complete moron? Of course you go to the same site, the card talk section of cars.com, or you'll order by phone just call 8-8-8-car junk. Thank you, Vinny. That was

a real eye open for me. I open your eye, wise guy. Car Talk is a production of Dewey Cheatham and Howe and WBUR in Boston. And even though Shaquille O'Neill throws one into the mezzanee seats every time we say it, this is NPR National Public Radio.