The Best One Yet - 🏋️ “$50 gym fee” — Marriott’s suck-flation. Robinhood’s price problem. Molson’s draught divide.

Episode Date: August 4, 2022

If you’re traveling right now, did you have to pay extra to use the pool? We gotta introduce you to… Suck-flation. Your beer choices are messing with Molson Coors: You either got a premium brew or whatever can is cheapest. And Robinhood is letting go of 23% of its workers because price isn’t a competitive advantage. $TAP $HOOD $MARFollow The Best One Yet on Instagram, Twitter, and Tiktok: @tboypodAnd now watch us on YoutubeWant a Shoutout on the pod? Fill out this formGot the Best Fact Yet? We got a form for that tooLearn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This is Nick. This is Jack. It's Thursday, the new Friday, August 4th, and today's pod is the best one yet. This really is a T-boy. But wait, Jack, did you hear the bad news about our avocado arbitrage opportunity? Our scheme? Yeah, the scheme. Did you hear about the scheme?

Where we buy avocados in Australia and then sell them for double here in the States for $1.59 margin? Yeah, one of the Yetis wrote in. We got a problem with this scheme. But let's just talk about it later. We'll deal with this later. We'll deal with it later. Jack, what's our first story?

Mulsing Coors just told us that Americans want. either premium beer or really cheap beer. Yeties, the last place you want to be in this economy is stuck in the middle with you. Our second story, Robin Hood announced, frankly, a bunch of bad news this week. So Jack and I are covering Robin Hood News for the first time in the T-Boy era. Our third and final story, if you're on vacation at a hotel right now, did you have to pay extra a fee to use the pool? And Jack and I have identified a new form of inflation.

It's suckflation. It kind of sucks. I'm sorry, Yeties, but better you hear you. hear it from us than from the hotel concierge. But yet is before we hit that wonderful mix. Just a perfect mix for the new Friday, Jack. I love the mix. Attention to all the interns, analysts, and summer associates listening.

Basties, if you're approaching the end of your rotational program this summer, Jack and I have an opportunity for you. Jump right over to the C-suite with a brand-new corporate role. The C-C-C-O, the chief candy officer. The C-C-C-L. A Canadian Candy. company Candy Funhouse wants an executive who's got Willie Wonka Vives. Yeah, they want you to crush candy, not cost.

Here's the CCO role. Consume and review 3,500 pieces of candy per month. Jack and I did the math, that's 167 candies for you to consume a day. Sorry, this junior man tastes two junior. These Kit Katz, they're missing the crunch? The M on the 7M, I'm telling you, it looks like a W to me. Jack, what is the pay for this chief candy officer roll? You get 78,000 a year.

That's in dollars, not donuts. And can you talk to us about the benefits plan? Oh, it's got an aggressive dental plan. But what are the job requirements if we're going to apply? Well, you must be proficient in chewing, digesting, and enjoy. Experience with Stevia and artificial food covering, that is a plus. Crappy trick-or-treaters need not apply. Bonus if you're lactose-tolerant.

And as an equal opportunity employer, we offer competitive calories. If you are interested in applying for the chief candy officer role, you got to do so by August 31st. Candy Funhouse. Send a resume and send a list of your most recent cavities. Because you better have a bunch in those molars. If you're a Yeti, we're happy to provide a referral. Yes, we will. We expect a referral fee. I'll make it Snickers. Let's hit our three stories.

Fifteen years before this song, two boys from the Northeast met in the dorm. They had an idea to cause a cultural storm. It's the 50%. That's a fat tip. Tea Boy City on your at list. If you know you know because we're ready to go, we can't wait no more. just start the show. Or our first story, Mulsin Khor stock just plummeted 10% because your beer habits,

they're changing. Like Moses, we're all parting the beer seeds. Oh, what's a decision you regret? Actually, that's not even saying that. It's kind of a depressing thing to hit on the pot. Well, when it comes to beer, the double stout chocolate ale, you never want to order that, unless you never want to get up again. You're going to regret that because it's like drinking of food.

Well, Mulsincor has made a decision a year ago. it also regrets. Yeah, they cut a dozen of their cheapest beers. Pour one out for your ice house edge. Goodbye, Miller High Life Light. And then Jack, what happened to Molson Corses sales in the last three months? In the last quarter, sales fell a tad. And the stock dropped 10% because killing off those cheap beer brands was the wrong decision. Okay, yeties, here's what Jack and I found fascinating about these earnings. A new phenomenon is happening with beer buyers. We're calling it the great draft divide. when you're buying beer, you are going to extremes. Us U.S. consumers are either buying the cheapest beer or the most expensive option in Isle 6 has to offer.

You're either getting the $12.30 pack of Keystone Light or you're getting the $12.6 pack of the Blue Moon. Frat juice or premium Belgian white served with an orange wedge. Jack, I interest you in the Stella Artois? Or would you like the official beer sponsor of Sig Sig SIG-A. Is it served in a dirty plastic cup? That happens to be the only glassware we offer. It's served in a jello shot. Yet these sales of Morson Corr's high-end beer

experienced double-digit sales growth last quarter, like their imported Italian poroni. And sales of their cheapest stuff, like your Coors Light and your Millillight, that also jumped to an all-time high. That's why Moulson Coors is wishing they had even more of that cheap stuff, those dozen beers like they used to have. Rest in peace, Milwaukee's Best Light. We had a good run.

Well, guess what? Jack and I jumped in T-boy style and discovered that there's actually a Harvard Business School case study on exactly this phenomenon. The phenomenon when consumers shift to the extremes of the price spectrum. The official MBA term for this concept is extremness seeking. That'll cost you $100,000 yet,ies. We just saved it for you. It's when the middle options are really unclear.

So you say, you know what? I'm just going to choose one of the extremes. That's a whole lot easier. I want either the best one, the most expensive, or the cheapest one. That's going to save me money. So, Jack, what's the takeaway for our buddies over? in the beer industry. Can we talk about the Moses principle? Yeah, it is, this isn't a religious podcast, but we're seeing a biblical shift out there. Yeah, we're not trying to evangelize you here

on the T-Boy pot, but consumers are parting the seas. They're going for the extremes. And the middle brands, they're getting squeezed out. But here's the shocker. Pale ales aren't the only industry that are experiencing this Moses Magnus. Ferrari just announced this week, record car sales in the U.S., but you know what? So did Dollar General Store. Jack and I noticed Delta is selling more first-class seats, but Spirit Airlines is back to record highs as well. Yet he's, despite the stock market decline, the wealthy are still living their best life in America. And more in the middle are going down market as inflation hurts their wallets. That's why our spending is getting split, like Moses parting the seas.

If you don't believe us, just look at your pint glass. For our second story, Robin Hood just announced bad earnings, big layoffs, and another regulatory fund. And it reminds us that price is not a competitive advantage. Okay, Jack, before we jump into this story, we need to, we need to define the relationship. We need the DTR here. We know what you might be thinking. Didn't you guys work at Robin Hood? Yeah, we actually did.

We sold our first company to Robin Hood and then we worked at Robin Hood for three years. And isn't this pod still sponsored by Robin Hood? Yeah, you'd be right there too. Jack and I only have Robin Hood ads in this podcast in the T-Boy pot. But this pod is not a part of Robin Hood. We are an independent company. with Robin Hood as the exclusive sponsor. And since we're an independent company,

we have editorial freedom to cover whatever company, whoever we choose in the T-Boy pod. And since we're covering Robin Hood's news today, we're going to pause the Robin Hood ads in today's episode. That's our policy. The way we see it, we just don't think it makes sense to hit you with a Robin Hood story

and then hit you with a Robin Hood ad. So without further ado, let's turn to the news. Here we go. Robin Hood announced on Tuesday a hat trick of bad things. Okay, here's the lineup. We got users, revenue, and trading volume all dropped big all last quarter. Now, it is tough to compare Robin Hood's results this year to last year.

It is. Because do you remember the meme stock trading boom? It was huge for Robin Hood. Even that Wild Ride GameStop PR debacle, that couldn't stunt Robin Hood's rise last year. But in the year since then, monthly active users trading on Robin Hood fell by 34%. Okay. And then revenues, they fell 44%. And assets under custody, i.e. like, stock.

stocks in Robin Hood accounts, their value fell by 38% since last year. Ipsa facto stocks don't always go up and a market downturn has popped the retail trading. Well, that's the early takeaway. Now, one thing did rise for Robin Hood, but it was a legal fine. Yeah, New York State fined Robin Hood's crypto division for not having sufficient anti-money laundering programs and other violations. Add all that up, and here's actually the most painful news for Robin Hood of all. Robin Hood CEO announced yesterday that 23% of workers are getting laid off.

Now, despite that hat trick of bad things, Robin Hood stock actually rose yesterday as a result. Yeah, it's one of these shocking things that just kind of like happens with bad news, but stocks popping. It looks like Wall Street was focused on the layoffs and figures that paying fewer workers will hopefully improve the profitability situation at Robin Hood. But overall, Robin Hood stock has fallen 70% since its IPO exactly a year ago. It's been a painful decline. We've watched it the whole way because we own the stock. This is Nick, this is Jack. We still own the stock.

So Jack, what's the takeaway for our buddies over at Robin Hood? Price is not a competitive advantage. Yet he's nine years ago. Robin Hood took the investing world by storm with no fee investing. It was, aka free investing. But now, just about every brokerage and even some crypto brokers have dropped fees as well. The lowest price, that was a short-term advantage for Robin Hood, giving it millions of users and a whole bunch of momentum.

But now, Robin Hood's lowest price is the same price as everyone else. Yeah, so for long-term success, Robin Hood needs a new competitive advantage. New products, a brand people love, or superior user experience, those are all candidates. Because price is not a long-term competitive advantage. For our third and final story, hotels are charging more than ever for your revenge travel, but they're also seeing more complaints. That's why we have to introduce you to suckflation. But Jack, can we talk about the pivot back to experiences?

It's back, baby. Millennials are done buying stuff, hoarding style, pandemic style. We want to do stuff again. Q the Marriott Hotels earnings report, Jack. Yeti's Marriott International, publicly traded corporation, has 1.5 million hotel rooms. And they want to book them all. Well, guess what? Occupancy at Marriott? It tripled compared to last year.

Revenues doubled for the hotel chain. It's revenge travel. And the CEO of Marriott says there's no signs of a slowdown in global lodging demand. You're not just hitting Majorca. You're upgrading to the ocean view and then tear it through the mini bar. Ah, a key reason for the revenue surge at hotels, it's a surprise you get at the end of your trip. Okay, Jack, the Santa Monica Proper Hotel. Our favorite. favorite hotel in Los Angeles. Helton, right? I used the Peloton, I always used the Peloton there.

Except here's the funny thing. Like, love the design, very earthy tone. Yeah. But then they charged us a fee for using a gym at the end of this day. What? Yeah. A gym fee? Just wanted to use the gym.

Thought it was included. Apparently it wasn't. Yeah, it is. There are brand new resort fees like that. Heading your lounge chair like a falling coconut. Don't even ask about the towels. For example, Jack, what's going on at the Bellagio over in Vegas? The Bellagio in Vegas is charging you $200.

bucks to use the pool. Yeah, you can like put your body in the water for free, but put your body in the lounge chair. The lounge chair is going to cost you 200 bucks if you want to sit down. All right, Jack, let's pop on over to the Sheraton over in Waikiki on Honolulu, Hawaii. Now, of course there's a fee if you want to get your car valet parked. Naturally. But you're also going to experience a fee when you self-park in the big parking lot that the hotel has. Jack, are we talking about fee-tail? Is this becoming a feeocracy? This is fee-tale. We're being charged for stuff that.

should obviously be included free of charge. Yeties, here's the wildest part. It's not just the fees that are adding up. It's the hotel complaints that are adding up too. Sheets aren't getting made for like a couple days. There's no towel refresh. And you're like, hey, this dacry, I ordered a new dacery like 45 minutes ago. Where's the dacery?

The reason complaints are up is because of this. 97% of hotels in this country are experiencing a staffing shortage. There are literally just not enough pool boys to get you that virgin dacery refill. your own bed. So Jack, what's the takeaway for all of us who are just trying to have a relaxing vacation right now? The CDC has identified a new variant of inflation. It's called suckflation. Suckflation. Yet is the average daily hotel rate. It's up 17%. So we're paying more for hotels. And all those fees we just mentioned, they're new fees. So we're paying way more for hotels. But this worker shortage due to COVID sickness, vacation, struggle to hire, it means we're getting

less. So we're paying way more, but getting less. That is so. suckflation. And get this, traveler satisfaction, it just had its biggest drop in years because it all sucks. As the Wall Street Journal sums it up, hotels cost more, but don't expect any better service. So hotels, they're charging as higher prices, but for a worse quality product. It's not just inflation. It's the first ever suckflation. Jack, can you whip up the takeaways for us for the new Friday? Muls and Cores wishes they could resurrect the cheap beer brands that they killed off. Because like Moses, we're parting the beer seas. For our second story, Robinhood announced poor earnings, layoffs, and another fine.

Price isn't a long-term competitive advantage. Our third and final story is Marriott Hotels. Their occupancy tripled, and the revenues per room doubled. But those hotels, they're also a prime example of consumer suckflation. We're all experiencing it together. It sucks. I really wanted that tackery 11 minutes ago. Now, time for the best fact yet, which we just got from Mark Golden in Southern California.

Honestly, it kind of bummed us out. All right. The avocado arbitrage business. Nick and I schemed up earlier this week. Like literally have the tickets on the Qantas flight ready to book, Jack. Well, since avocados are so cheap in Australia, we can fly there, buy them, bring them back to the U.S. and sell them at a huge profit. Okay, but Mark just updated us that, like, legally we can't do that.

Please don't tell TSA. Apparently, you're not allowed to sell Australian avocados in the United States. Now, the legal reason is due to phytosanitary restrictions like bugs and diseases. we can't bring avocados from Australia to the United States. Now, this is kind of like, of course, because like the avocado companies would have done that if they could. Right. It also, Jack, means you and I've got to sell a whole bunch of avocados really quickly.

Orgy! Or have a lot of avocado toasts. Or start selling guac for not extra. Yeties, you look fantastic today. And if you want to help grow this pod, One thing you can do is you can drop down, rate and review us and follow the pot, like follow us every day. And buy our avocado toast. Please.

Get us out of this hole. We can use it. We'll see you tomorrow. Hopefully. And before we go, happy birthday to Andrea from Palermo Sicily, who is celebrating that birthday by swimming across Lake Tahoe. I hope it's the skinny part of Lake Tahoe. It's a six-hour swim, apparently. What?

Yeah. I had my honeymoon there. And congratulations to Anthony, who's playing golf in Pinehurst. in his first ever U.S. Kids Golf National Championship. And congrats to Andrea Siemannowski, who's graduating from Penn Law School and it's her birthday. And Linda Cruz is celebrating her birthday with her daughter, Aria, at the proper hotel in Santa Monica. It's the best hotel in L.A. It's a great hotel. If you want to use the gym, wait for someone to prop the door open.

And Hunter Daniels whipping up some sourdough starter for his birthday over in Maryland. And happy birthday to Carl Nelson from Bernie, Texas. And Garrison Whitaker, happy birthday in American 14. Utah. And congrats to Delette Kemper, who's celebrating her first birthday of their podcast, T-Over Interiors. And to anyone else celebrating something today, make it a T-boy. Celebrate the wins. This is Jack, Nick and I both own stock of Peloton and Robin Hood. Hey, Hyundai, Hyundai, Hyundai, Hyundai. Come on down.

Come on down. Come on that. Terrat tree four. Nobody does it better. We're going to get you a deal. We've got a deal. We've got to get him, Jack. My deals are so good. My wife's divorced me. My deals are so good, the deals are doing their own deals. My deals are so good.

I just declared personal bankruptcy.