The Best One Yet - 💻 “MacValue Meal” — Apple’s $599 laptop. Soulja Boy’s AI phone. Iran’s bull case. +Taser Alarm Clock

Episode Date: March 5, 2026

Apple launched its cheapest laptop ever… we think repeats a mistake Tesla made.Soulja Boy is the 1st rapper to clone his voice with AI… to sell B2B software.Stocks are actually up since the War with Iran began... We explain investors’ bull case.Plus, tasering, squats, math problems… say hello to Extreme Alarm Clocks.$AAPL $META $SPYBuy tickets to The IPO Tour (our In-Person Offering) TODAYArlington, VA (3/11): https://www.arlingtondrafthouse.com/shows/341317 New York, NY (4/8): https://www.ticketmaster.com/event/0000637AE43ED0C2Los Angeles, CA (6/3): SOLD OUTGet your TBOY Yeti Doll gift here: https://tboypod.com/shop/product/economic-support-yeti-doll NEWSLETTER:https://tboypod.com/newsletter OUR 2ND SHOW:Want more business storytelling from us? Check our weekly deepdive show, The Best Idea Yet: The untold origin story of the products you're obsessed with. Listen for free to The Best Idea Yet: https://wondery.com/links/the-best-idea-yet/NEW LISTENERSFill out our 2 minute survey: https://qualtricsxm88y5r986q.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_dp1FDYiJgt6lHy6GET ON THE POD: Submit a shoutout or fact: https://tboypod.com/shoutouts SOCIALS:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tboypod TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@tboypodYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@tboypod Linkedin (Nick): https://www.linkedin.com/in/nicolas-martell/Linkedin (Jack): https://www.linkedin.com/in/jack-crivici-kramer/Anything else: https://tboypod.com/ About Us: The daily pop-biz news show making today’s top stories your business. Formerly known as Robinhood Snacks, The Best One Yet is hosted by Jack Crivici-Kramer & Nick Martell. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This is Nick. This is Jack. It's Thursday, the new Friday, March 5th. And today's pod is the best one yet. This is a T-boy. The top three pop business news stories you need to know today. Well, first, it is Jack's birthday, and you are glowing over there, my friend. You know what Alex got me for my birthday?

What you did? What you did? What you do? A Rawlings baseball glove. Classic. Top of the line baseball glove. I haven't had a glove in like 10 years since I lost it. You got to grease that thing, even though you're never going to use it.

I'll put it under my mattress tonight. One other big. announcement besides Jack's birthday. Jack, should we share with the Eddies? Wednesday, next week, March 11th in Washington, D.C., our special guest for T-Boy Live, it's the Duchess of Disruption, the sultaness of Scoops, the queen of asking questions, Kara Swisher. We got Kay Swish, she's coming on the show live. Still got tickets, by the way. Link in episode description, buy him now. Just a few left. Jack, three fantastic stories for today's pod. What do we got on the T-boy? For our first story, Apple just launched their cheapest laptop ever. The

The Macbook Neo is just $599. And it tastes like McDonald's because this is Tech's first value meal. For our second story, Soldier Boy is the first rapper to clone his voice with AI. So why is Soldier Boy doing it? Well, naturally, it's for Enterprise Software. And our third and final story. Why are stocks actually up since the war in Iran began? Well, it's because investors see a bull swimming in the Persian Gulf.

But Yeties, before we hit that wonderful mix of stories. Whoa, stuck the landing. Love the mix. Fantastic mix, Jack. New trend alert. Extreme alarm clocks. We're talking about alarm clocks that will not let you snooze under any circumstances. Not just the loud noise or big vibration alarm clocks. We're talking alarm clocks that will shock you, scare you, and take your money if you don't get up.

Get this. There is one startup that makes an alarm clock called the sonic boom. It physically shakes like an earthquake on your side table. It'll give you a headache. Another, it's called the shock clock. Because this thing will literally shock you up to 300 volts of energy. Another, it's called alarmie because it makes you complete a task to get the alarm to turn off. I think I love this one the most, Jack.

You must type a famous quote or complete a math problem. So you wake up at 5.05 a.m. And it's like, what's the square root of three? I'll stop when you get it to within one decimal point. Okay, but Bessie's wildest of all is the nudge alarm that makes you scan the barcode on the shampoo bottle over in your bathroom. And if you don't get up and do that within three minutes, it withdraws $25 from your linked bank account. And then it gives that money to a charity. So if you snooze, you lose.

You lose cash. You lose literal cash. According to the Wall Street Journal, one user lost $999 from that specific alarm clock. Sleeping in was a really costly habit for that, dude. Sebasti's extreme alarms there, taser and torturing and stealing, stealing your money. And yet over one million Americans voluntarily use the. Now, honestly, Eddie, Jack and I hope that we are the ones who wake you up in the morning. Not by pinching you.

But with a little razzle, dazzle, sprinkle, dinkle. But if you still are not woken up, Jack and I have one remaining question for you. What is nine times five divided by three, rounded up to the nearest prime number? Multiply by the square root of 46. Jack, ten are three stories. Fifteen years before this song, two boys from the northeast met in the dorm. They had an idea to cause a cultural storm. It's the best one yet, but the best is an norm. Jack Nick.

That's it. I don't even think they need to practice. 50% that's a fat tip. Tea Boy City on your at list. If you know, you know because we're ready to go. We can't wait no more. So just start the show. Start the show.

First, a quick word from our sponsor. For our first story, Apple just created its first ever Mac value meal. That's what we're calling it. Because it's a $599 MacBook, the cheapest laptop Apple has ever made. But just like what happened with Tesla, we think this will lead to downgrades, not upgrades. Yeah, it's a funny thing Jack and I noticed. Jack, can you share what the upside is if you do not invest in AI? Like Apple?

Yeah, like Apple. It's that you have plenty of money left over to invest in new hardware. So this week, Apple unveiled their new lower-priced iPhone 17E, a new iPad, a new external monitor, all very boring. Yeah, they left the best for last. They did. Yesterday, they unveiled the MacBurface. Neo. Their cheapest computer by far. Yeah, Jack, can you hop on LinkedIn and read us the resume on this brand new Apple laptop?

13-inch liquid retina display, an aluminum body, 1080P camera, touch ID, and two USB ports. To quote Booboobie Miles, and he can pass! I mean, that's the core of what you'd expect in a MacBook. It is. It's kind of like driving a Jeep. It gets the job done. So Nick and I got to ask, what's the catch? How was Apple able to drop the price by 40% compared to a MacBook Air. How is Apple able to drop the price 60% compared to their MacBook Pro? Well, there are a couple downsides. The keyboard is not backlit, so it's tough to type in the dark. And this new laptop, it runs on a chip originally built for like an iPhone 16. But unless you're at home programming

like the next Zelda for your big Fortnite tournament, we don't think you'll notice that lower grade processor. There's some vintage parts under that chassis. It doesn't matter. You're not going to worry about it. So what is this really? It's a value meal. Textile. Or as Jack and I call it, it's a Mac value meal because it's coming from Apple. Apple sucked McDonald's and created a value meal but for technology. And just like McDonald's value meals are winning in this economy, we think Apple's Mac value meal is going to win too. But not how Apple expects. True. Because this laptop reminds us of Tesla's value meals. Ah, Tesla's value meals. We're talking about the Model Y and Model 3 cars. Those were Tesla's mass-produced lower-priced products. Just like the new Apple-Neo

MacBook is their lower-priced product. And like with Tesla, these MacBooks only allow two variations to keep the cost down. You can change the memory and you can change the color. That's it. Because in America, just 24% of laptops are actually made by Apple. Over 60% of the American laptop market is Dell and HP, which are much lower price than MacBooks. So you see what we're getting at here. Apple is hoping this new version tempts more people to join Club Apple. You know, take a bite out of Apple's friendly value meal. And here's an interesting twist. Given the shortage of RAM chips in this economy, Dell and HP are having to raise the price of their laptops right now. On the other hand, Apple's now flexing its financial muscle and doing the

opposite. It's dropping prices by 40%. So the next time you consider buying a new laptop, for the first time, the Apple option will be price competitive compared to Dell and HP. Honey, we're getting an Apple. Apple's going on the price offense while the laptop competition is on the price defense. Hey, Tim Cook, if you're listening, throw a happy meal in there. That's what Jack and I are thinking. So, Jack, what's the takeaway for our buddies over at Apple? Forget the upgrade cycle. We think this cheap laptop will lead to a downgrade cycle. Yeties, this $600 MacBook, it is designed to compete with Google's Chromebook. It's meant for students and lower-income customers. And it's clearly targeting kids because of the colors. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like the whole color's Skittl style of the rainbow.

But we think Apple's cheap laptop also was one last similarity with Tesla's. Model 3. It'll cannibalize sales of the higher-end models. Tesla's Model 3 and Model Y quickly became 95% of Tesla's sales. The higher-end Model S and Model X simply couldn't compete. Jack and I look back on that and we think it was a pricing mistake by Elon. Looking at value, the Model 3 and the Model Y, those were no-brainers to buy. I got one because the price just made sense. Sure, the Model S is a little bit bigger and a little bit nicer, but for double the price, it just didn't make sense. Well, it's the same situation for Apple. The new MacBook Neo simply has fantastic value compared to the higher end MacBooks. Sure, some will insist on the higher memory and the need to

support two external monitors, or maybe it's their work computer and they're expensing it. Nerd alert, Jack. Just like some Tesla buyers paid twice the price for a Model S car that went slightly faster. They needed zero to 60 and 3.0, not 3.8. But for most, when their MacBook hits The Fritz, we think they're going to downgrade, not upgrade. Value meal products cannibalized at Tesla. We think this laptop could do the same at Apple. For our second story, Soldier Boy just became the first rapper to automate his voice with AI. He's doing it, though, to boost an enterprise software startup.

You kind of love it. Because Spectacle always sells. Now, Jack, if we're going to tell the story, could you whip open the white pages over there and tell us the most famous phone numbers of all time? 1-800-Call-A-T. That's a good one. Dow right down the middle, and it's free, I think. What about 1877 Cars for Kids? Like, you can't get that out of your head right?

K-A-R-S-Cars for Kids. But, of course, there is a Jenny. You can always call Jenny at 867-5309. When I was a kid, my landline phone number ended with 5309. That is the best fact yet right there. But Yeties, add a new phone number to the famous phones list, 415-480-0-0-0-0. By the way, if you have a better famous phone number,

drop it in the comments. We'll say the best one tomorrow. But if you call that 415 number, Soldier Boy will tell him. Because that number goes to D'Andre Cortez. You know him as Soldier Boy. Soldier Boy, the 35-year-old rapper from Hotlanda, Atlanta, Georgia. In 2007, you tried to do that dance to the song Crank That. Yeah, 2007 Crank That in which he says the word crank 55 times in the song, we counted.

But Soldier Boy is not just a 2007 Billboard Top 100 artist. He's an innovator. He is, because Soldier Boy says he was the first ever run. rapper on YouTube. And he says he was the first ever rapper to use an iPhone. Actually, this is unconcerned by Apple's PR team, but Soldier Boy claims that Steve Jobs personally handed him an iPhone when he did a music video at his house. And it makes sense. In 2007, that song was the most viral song of the year and Apple would want to get that publicity. I believe it. Jack, apparently like the Apple team showed up while he was in the pool and was like he had a margarita in one hand and they're

like, just take this device and hand it. This is passing my fact check. But besties, we got to add one other first to Soldier Boy's resume. Soldier Boy is now the first rapper to clone his voice for AI. Because this rapper gave permission to a large language model to ingest his music, his interviews, his content, and create an AI clone. But the wildest part is how you access his AI clone. Because we've seen this before, but we've never seen this. 415-480-0-0-0-0. Call that phone number and you can speak with Soldier Boy. Sorry, Soldier Boy's AI. Yeah, because the system greets the callers in a near-perfect. recreation of Soldier Boy's voice and basically jumps right into the conversation with you. You can ask him about his life, his lyrics. You can ask him to sing his songs. Oh, oh, you want to talk

to Soldier Boy about 19th century Russian literature? Boom. He's got content for you right there. Because he's AI. He's read the entire internet. Oh, and Soldier Boy's second most famous song, Kiss me through the phone. But now you can for free, literally. Although we should point out, Jack, Solge boy isn't UNICEF. He's not doing this for charity, right? This is actually a marketing move for a Bay Area AI startup called Bland AI. It's a similar business model to 11 labs. Bland AI has raised 65 million bucks to access and license recognizable voices. Now you may remember last year, Matthew McConaughey tried to patent protect his voice. Yeah, all right, all right. And as recently as last fall, Soldier Boy was complaining publicly about AI stealing music and stealing famous voices. But Soldier Boy

must be figuring that resistance is futile. He may as well be profited off of that voice. So he's flipped his position. The real question isn't about Soldier Boy. It's about the question behind this marketing stunt. Because this isn't an entertainment business, is it, Jack? No, it's not. Jack, what's the takeaway for our buddy Soldier Boy and Bland AI? This is the Brooklyn Bridge Elephant Parade once again.

You see, Yeties, Blan AI is the startup behind this Soldier Boy move. They're worth reported $350 million, and they are a B2B Enterprise Software Company. Despite that big valuation, it's not a sexy business. That's sexy. to automate call centers with AI. So the whole point of this Soldier Boy stunt? No? Prove its AI is so realistic.

Humans will think it's not a bot on the other line, but an actual human. It's actually Soldier Boy. That'd be valuable if you were trying to automate call centers with AI. Yes, it would be. And you know what? Jack and I have seen this strategy before. 140 years ago on the Brooklyn Bridge.

Let me take this one, Nick. Please, you got it, Brooklyn Boy. When they finished the Brooklyn Bridge, New Yorkers were afraid to cross it. So the city hired the Ringling Brothers and Barnum, Bailey Circus and said, bring your elephants over. We're marching them across the bridge in the middle of the day. And Jack, what is the connection between those elephants 140 years ago on the

Brooklyn Bridge and our buddy, Soldier Boy? To convince skeptics that something will work, don't use reason. Use spectacle. That is why Soldier Boy is going viral for a phone number that's actually boosting a B-to-B business. New York used elephants. The AI industry used Soldier Boy. Now a quick word from our sponsor. For our third and final story, the war in Iran began six days ago, but stock markets are actually up? How could that be exactly? We know what Wall Street is thinking because we used to work there. So here's Wall Street's bull case for the war in Iran.

Now, Yeties, you've been with us all week. We've been covering the risks of the Iran war to U.S. markets, including our drone arbitrage story. Because buying defense missiles to shoot down drones, it's not the best way to grow our economy, is it? Despite the uncertainty and spike in oil prices, stocks are actually up since the war started. That's as of yesterday afternoon. Now, investors know the downside risks of this war. They're smart people. We said uncertainty gives investors the ick. But clearly, investors are giving the upside potential of this war equal weight in their calculation. So Wall Street clearly sees a bull case for the war in Iran that we think a savvy, ambitious, informed, interesting person like you should

know. So here's a taste of it. Let's sprinkle on some context. Let's do it, Jack. Because Iran has been an enemy of the United States for almost 50 years, there's a huge perception versus reality disconnect about Iran. All right, Jack, let's start with the perception. Iran, it's in the Middle East, deserts, burkas, a primitive economy, it must be just held together by oil. With the reality, though, actually, Iran has deep human capital, deep innovation, and a self-reliant economy. You see, before the 1979 revolution, Iran was a prosperous nation. Uber's CEO, eBay's founder, both of them, were born in that past Iran.

And Iran is still today, very educated. Get this, Iran ranks number 15 on the list of most academic papers published per year. And yes, Iran sits on the third largest oil reserve in the world. So they have both natural resources, but also really deep human resources. I mean, an example of this we're seeing in real time, just look at that Iranian battleship that the U.S. sunk just on Tuesday. A 300-foot modern military machine with weaponry? That's not a primitive economy, Nick.

The Iranians built that. Now, Bessis, we're not talking about the leadership or government here. We are talking about the people, the 90 million people in Iran who are industrious, well-educated, innovative, creative. But speaking of the government, Nick, Iran's been in the economic doghouse. Death to Israel, death to America, those were popularized by the first supreme leader of the country and have become the country's catchphrases. And Iran is the largest state sponsor of terror in the world, according to our CIA. But when you add all this up, what is this bull case? that Wall Street appears to be seeing right now. It's that the people of Iran don't want to be pariahs anymore.

They want to replace their government. The bull case, the optimistic case investors are seeing right now is that our government just took out the Ayatollah and a switch. So our government just took out the Ayatollah. But if you're hoping it gets replaced with democracy, history suggests you shouldn't hold your breath. Yeah, to sprinkle on some more context, the Kato Institute found 28 times the US military or CIA has caused a regime change,

in another country. And Jack, what are the results? Only three of those 28 resulted in long-term democracy. Two of them were post-World War II, Japan and Germany. Still, the bull case that Wall Street seems to think has potential is that we replace a repressive dictatorship with an impressive democracy that the United States can trade with. So, Jack, what's the takeaway for our buddies looking at the war in Iran and stock markets? The base case that investors are pricing in right now is regime change light, like in Venezuela. Now, Yeties, Jack and I mentioned when we worked on Wall Street, and here's what we were talking about. When stock markets decide the fair valuation of a stock, they create a bear, a bull,

and a base case scenario. Investors associate each with a stock price and then calculate the weighted average of the stock based on the probability of those three cases. Now, on Tuesday, we shared with you the bear case, the negative scenario, that a forever war will cost years and trillions of dollars to the United States government. Just like with Afghanistan and Iraq. And we just finished telling you the bull case, which is that Iran transforms into a prosperous democratic trading partner. But Jack, can we please define the base case scenario here the most likely outcome, which is something much less dramatic? It's that the head of state and Iran changes, but Iran's institutions remain in place. Just like we saw in Venezuela. Maduro's regime is

still in place, just without Maduro himself and less anti-American sentiment. So the base case, it's probably that the United States could exit Iran after destroying its nuclear and domestic missile programs, and that the Islamic Republic could remain intact just with new leadership that poses less threat to the United States. But besties, we don't know how it'll end. And investors on the stock market, they don't know either. But with stocks flat or slightly up since the world began, it looks like the base case we just described is what's being priced in. It looks like investors are thinking regime change light. Jack, could you whip up the takeaways for us for your birthday, the new Friday?

Our first story was the MacValue meal. Apple's new MacBook Neo is priced low to get people to buy their first Apple laptop. But we think it'll cannibalize and lead to downgrades from existing users, not upgrades. For our second story, it's Soldier Boy. He's letting bland AI use his voice, but it's to sell automated call center services. This is a Soldier Boy marketing spectacle, just like the elephant parade on the the Brooklyn Bridge. And our third and final story, investors' reaction to the warner-on has been a shrug. Yeah. Stocks were slightly up as we recorded this episode. So considering the bear case,

the base case, and the bull case, it seems investors are pricing in regime change light. But besties, this pod's not over yet. Here's what else you need to know today. First, pop the collars. Abercrombie and Fitch just announced earnings. Get this, 13th straight quarter of sales gains. Abercrombie, it's been getting spanked by tariffs, but consumers are still loading up on the moose. Oh, and what's the keyjack? This is interesting. Millennials who once wore Abercrombie's cargo shorts are now buying Fitch for their kids. Yeah, that cologne smells like... And second, the crypto ice age just warmed up a tad.

Coinbase and Robin Hood Stocks both jumped yesterday as the president threw his support behind a new crypto bill. In fact, the president called out banks for holding up the legislation because it hurts the banks. It might. The new crypto legislation would let crypto companies offer yield to their customers in return for stable coins, which poses a big threat to conventional bank accounts. And finally, congratulations to Michael Jordan on winning in yet another sport, but not basketball. Definitely not baseball. Michael Jordan, he owns a racing team. It's called the 23XI NASCAR racing team. And his hand-picked race car driver, Tyler Riddick, just set a NASCAR record. First time a driver is won the first three car races of the NASCAR season. Hey, Netflix and Apple. Yeah. It's time to start

making a documentary about Michael Jordan's last dance inside his car. Last dance around the loop. Now, time for the best fact yet, which, because Jack just traveled all the way around the sun again means he has the honors, it's Jack's best fact yet for his birthday. It's a T-Boy birthday tradition. Okay, so the World Baseball Classic starts today. It's a once-every-four-year baseball tournament. Because the Olympics don't do baseball, so we do the World Baseball Classic. Now, Japan has won three of the last five world baseball classics, Nick. But Jack, I believe your son, my pod son this year, is playing T-ball, which is important. And guess who's the coach of that team?

And guess who has a brand new baseball glove to be the coach of that team? Well, I'm not shocked, but it's definitely you, Jack. So youth sports is on my mind, which leads to this trivia question. All right, what do we go? What country has the most Little League World Series championships? All right, the T-Boy trivia. What country has the most Little League World Series baseball championship? Okay. Number three is Japan. Okay, that makes sense of you. Number two is Taiwan. Oh, I didn't

expect that. Number one is the United States. Right in our backyard. With 40 of the 77 Little League World Series championships. Yes, the bracket gives the United States a structural advantage, but no, that's not making me hedge this awesome trivia fact. No pressure, Wilder, no pressure pod sun on the Little League tea. You're going to be great no matter what. There's no strikeouts in T-ball. But you better bring home that gold. Yadis, you're looking fantastic for the new Friday. Jack, you are glowing for your birthday over there, my friend. Oh, I got

an idea for your birthday. You ready for this? Yeah, yeah. Bessie's as a gift, I think Jack will get a kick out of this. Can you just leave in a comment what you think Jack's ticker symbol would be? Like, if Jack was a stock, what would be his three or four-letter tickle symbol? I mean, you can't say Jack. That's too easy. So, Bessie, that's all we got to ask you today.

What ticker symbol represents? Jack. Can't wait to see what you say. Nick and I, we'll see you tomorrow. After I have some spaghetti meatballs for dinner today. There you go. It's not just Jack's birthday today. Congratulations to Roy Daniel down in DC. His birthday gift is tickets to our live show next week right down the street. We got some tickets still available. The link is in the episode description. And a happy birthday to Jeremy Hernandez turning 34 down in Denver. Jeremy, thank you so much for being a six-year Yeti. That's a double hat trick. And happy birthday to John Dell, who's turning seven in Charlestown, Massachusetts, just outside Mass.

This blazer skis faster than Spider-Man and is stronger than the Hulk. And Alex M. Happy 29th birthday over in Boston, also just outside Boston. Happy birthday to Frank Tabora in Sarasota, Florida. And Devin Ward, the AI superfan in Anderson, Indiana, has got the best birthday yet. Happy birthday to Xavier Chang. His wife is saying, I told you so, because now he's a die-hard Yetty, too. And Ty and Nick Mad Regal are twins in San Francisco. So, Ty actually saw me walk in with Maxi through the marina over the weekend.

Next time, Ty, you got to say hi. We love being the Yetis in the wild. Congratulations to Alyssa Schmidt, the first to successfully launch a pop-up store in Boston's Logan Airport. She's crushing it. And congratulations to Richard and the entire humanaut body scanning team. They've got a wild technology in a few cool places. You got to check them out. Congrats Richard.

And congratulations to Kristen and Oliver Tuffney in London, celebrating their first IBO. Their initial baby offer. their son, Heath David Tuffney, who's just born and he's looking fantastic. Ticker symbol, cute. This is Jack. I own stock of Netflix, and Nick and I both on stock of Apple and Robin Hood.