The Best One Yet - 💩 “Smelly in Paris” — Olympics $1.5B river cleanup. James Bond’s spy business. Lululemon’s nightlife opportunity.

Episode Date: June 7, 2024

50 days before the Olympics, Paris is still cleaning up its river for the swimming events… And paying $1.5B to do it.A startup run by British spies consults 40% of the world’s biggest companies… it’s selling information.And Lululemon stock is down 35% this year so we think they should pull an Abercrombie… and own an occasion.Plus, Tokyo’s government just launched a dating app… but if you fib about your height, you go to jail.$LULU $NKEGet the Saturday Newsletter: tboypod.com/newsletter Social: Follow us: on Instagram Watch us on YouTubeSubmit Facts & Shoutouts And connect with us on Nick’s LinkedIn & Jack’s LinkedInAbout Us: From the creators of Robinhood Snacks Daily, The Best One Yet (TBOY) is the daily pop-biz news show making today’s top stories your business. 20 minutes on the 3 business, economics, and finance stories you need, with fresh takes you can pretend you came up with — Pairs perfectly with your morning oatmeal ritual. Hosted by Jack Crivici-Kramer & Nick Martell. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This is Nick. This is Jack. It's Friday the real Friday, June 7th. And today's party is the best one yet. This is a tea boy. The top three pop business news stories you need to know today. Now, Jack, you just had your first Dr. Pepper in lovely Los Angeles, didn't you? My first two Dr. Peppers.

But what about your first boba tea? Not yet. Yeah, you got to binge on some tapioca balls before you head to LAX man. We're going to stop at the boba guys before I get out of you, right? What we're going to say? We're going on to the boba guys? Boba Time. Boba Lounge. Which one should we go to?

I got great recommendations from the Yetis. And they'll have Boba in the name of the store. In the meantime, Yetis, we got three fantastic stories for you. Jack, what's on today's team boy? For our first story, Lulu Lemon Stock is down 35% this year because its yoga attire feels kind of unfresh. So Jack

and I got a plan for Lulu, and we got it from Abercrombie. For our second story, get this. The Paris Olympics, it begins in 50 days. 50 days! But the river, in the middle of the city? Uh-huh. It's not ready.

Because Paris is spending $1.5 billion to clean up the stinky sen. And Jack and I will tell you why that's cheap. Yeah, and tell you why it's important. Because people are going to swim in it. Yeah, including you. Our third and final story. One company is secretly consulting the world's top businesses with British spies. So Jack and I are infiltrating the business model of a company founded by MI6 spies.

The name's Bond. Yes. Duane. Bond. But Yeties, before we hit that wonderful mix of stories. Fantastic mix of stories to go into a weekend with, man. The coolest new dating app you need to know about. It's not Tinder, it's not Bumble, and it's not Hinge. No, no, no, no.

Yetis, the coolest new dating app is from the city of Tokyo? Here's the news. Tokyo's government just launched its very own dating app. Yiddis, this is the wildest public sector moves since Leslie Knope. I think I need to repeat it. Yes, Jack. Tokyo's government launched its very own dating. app. And now Jack and I, we are used to private companies launching hookup apps. But we're not used to taxpayer-funded hookup apps. Jack, can you sprinkle on some swiping context for us over there?

Here's the important part. Japan actually has the lowest birth rate on planet Earth. So a few babies in Japan, Japan's economy is literally dropping. In fact, we did a story earlier in the year year. Yes. On a Japanese diaper company that pivoted from baby diapers to adult makers. Because they sell more diapers to 60-year-olds than to six-month-olds. And Japan's popular actually peaked 16 years ago. The number of Japanese people has shrank every year since. It's the oldest country in the world, and that's a huge threat to Japan's economy.

So, Japan's government is now trying to play matchmaker with its own dating app. And apparently the Tokyo mayor thinks he is cupid, Jack. This Tinder-style dating app actually cost the government $1.3 million to develop. But here's what Jack and I find fascinating. The Tokyo Tinder... It ain't no Tinder.

It's a little different than the dating app you're used to. Because yet is Japan's government's dating app is stricter than your mother. Get this. To join this dating app, you must. Get your ID. And submit your latest paycheck. And reveal your precise height without lying.

And reveal your real job title. And then you must do an interview with a government worker to prove that your intentions are like good. But that's not even all. There's more to do. When it's all over, you put your right hand up and you must take a pledge. That you downloaded this. this app to get married, not the fool around.

Because the goal is families and eventually babies, not flings and eventually booty calls. So besties, if you are looking for a man in finance trust fund, 6-5, Blue Eyes, we know where you can verifiably find them on the Tokyo government dating app. Because if that dude's actually 6-4 but said he's 6-5, then he's going to Tokyo prison. Lock him off. Jack, let's in our three stories. 15 years before this song Two boys from the Northeast met in the dorm They had an idea that caused a cultural storm

It's the best one yet But the best is an norm Jack Nick, that's it I don't even think they need to practice 50% that's a fat tip Tea Boy City on your at list If you know you know Because we're ready to go

We can't wait no more So just start the show Start the show First a quick word From our sponsor Our first story, Lulu Lemon Stock. It has been dropping and it needs a new growth opportunity. We think we found it.

Yes, we do. And we think we found it in a nightclub. Okay, Jack, you know that feeling at a yoga class when you're just not vibing with the teacher? You know what I mean? Yes. She wants you to say ohm shanti shanti. I'm not going to say om shanty shanty.

I'm just going to take a minute to myself. Namestay. I'm okay. I'll need to say it again. I'm all right. There is no led to me. Well, Yet he's Lulu. is giving that.

Lulu Lemon stock has fallen by 35% in the past year. Actually, isn't it, 35% so far this year? Yeah, so far in 2024. Which is even worse. Yeties, that is eight straight quarters of sales growth slowdown. Eight quarters ago, Lulu Lemon sales were growing by 32%. But last quarter, Lulu's sales grew just 10%. The class just started, and Lulu's CEO is already doing Shavasna.

Yeah. In fact, excluding the pandemic shutdown, Lulu just had its lowest sales. growth quarter since 2017. Lulu's like the Swami who fell asleep in the middle of meditation. You there, Swami? Somebody go shake him. Namaste. But Yeti's the number one reason for Lulu's slowdown right now.

What is it, Jack? Alt-athleisure. Alternative athleisure. Yeti's Lulu's core athleisure market is saturated with competition. Right now, you're probably wearing aloe leggings. Tomorrow, you're probably wearing Viori sports bras. From the day after that, sweaty betty spandex. It's all the alt-a-o-o-eathearts.

It used to be just Lulu. Now it's Lulu and a bunch of others. But yeties, here's what Jack and I find fascinating about this story. Lulu's real problem right now is that it needs to expand its practice. Lulu, you need to expand your practice.

Nick and I jumped in T-Boy style. We did. Every five years, Lulu Lemon's CEO announces the five-year growth plan. And the plan is always about doubling down. Yeah, Lulu's current growth plan is to double their e-commerce business, double their men's business, Double their international sales.

And their previous five-year growth plan was basically the same exact thing. But here's what we think. Instead of more of the same, Lulu needs more of something different. Instead of trying to sell more of the same stuff, Lulu Lemon should expand to new product lines. Now, we know what you're thinking, yes,

Lulu Lemon has a new line of office button-ups and a new line of golf dresses. But khakis and stretchy skirts, that's not bold enough to reignite growth. I mean, Jack, polo shirts, that's not big enough to pay off. power a whole Lulu long-term comeback, even if they're popped. So Yeties, instead, Jack and I think Lulu Lemon should actually borrow a strategy from another

turnaround company. Borrow a trick from someone else's practice. Someone... Colonie. Who smells Colonies? So Jack, what's the takeaway for our buddies over at Lulu Lemon? Great brands own an occasion, like Abercrombie. Yeties, last week, we told you about the top stock of the last two years, and that stock

was Abercrombie. The stock has nearly octupled in the past 18 months. And what was the key about Abercrombie's rise, Jack? Abercrombie and Fitch owned the wedding occasion. Yes. They launched a wedding shop with dresses and suits for bachelor parties, rehearsal dinners, and the big day. Now Lulu, they already own your mornings. You can wear yoga pants from Pilates at 7 a.m. to brunch afterwards. But we think now Lulu needs to own your evenings. Maybe Lulu Lemon attire can be rocked at the nightclub. Yeah, at nightclubs. Like, we think Lulu Lemon should become the fashion line for cocktail hour. Picture this. Lulu Lemon dresses and cute tops that you can wear from work straight to the bar afterwards. Just like you currently wear Lulu from the yoga class

to the brunch. Lulu lemon outfits for men and women that you can wear in the office that are also great for the club. So, besties, what Abercrombie's wedding shop proves is the value of owning a specific, clear use case. Because great brands own an occasion. And Lulu's next occasion should actually be the nightclub. For our second story, we are 50 days from the Paris Olympics, but Paris's

stinky river still is not ready for swimmers. But Paris has got a plan. Yes. And it shows the whole world how to fund the Olympics. Now, yet is historically the great cities of the world. They were built on rivers, or they were built

on oceans. From Rome to New York to Beijing. Yeah. They're by the Rio de Janeiro, it literally means river of genero. The reason, rivers or oceans are needed for transport and the shipping of boats. And also for the shipping of sewage. Yeah, because before indoor plumbing, people basically just pooped in the nearest water. Now, no, no, no, today we do have indoor plumbing, but rivers and major cities are still pretty stinky when it comes down to it. That's why this plan for the Paris Olympics are so bald. Yes. Paris is going to host their marathon swimming and triathlon events in the Sen River.

We repeat, Michael Phelps would theoretically be jumping into the Sen River to do the 100 meter swim and dash. Here's why that's a problem. Since 1923, Parisians have been forbidden from swimming in the Sen. It's that dirty. Jack, if you want to swim in the Sen when you're there this summer, it is not possible. True. Literally.

True. And according to environmentalists, the reason it's not possible is, and I quote, pollution of fecal origin. Yeties, the Sen is beautiful to look at, but it's less beautiful to digest. That's why Paris is spending $1.5 billion to clean up the Sen before the World's Olympians jump in there.

And that one and a half billion dollar cleanup of that Parisian river is the biggest expense of these Parisian Olympics. And guess what? They're actually not done, but they're confident they will be done by opening ceremonies.

Escargo, Escarneau. So Yetis, in 50 days, the Sen will be the river that runs through the Paris Olympics. Yeah, literally. And Jack said literally because the opening ceremony in Olympics won't even happen in a stadium like usual.

This is the first Olympic opening ceremony that will happen on boats. Get this, each nation is going to sail by boat through Paris on the Sen. That's the opening ceremony. Like a hundred boats going through the city of Paris. It's going to be romantic. And that's another reason why this river

is the biggest cost of these Olympics. But the real test isn't the open. ceremony. It's the marathon swimming and triathlon events because both of those require getting wet. In the San River. So Paris is building a massive underground reservoir, 100 feet under the city, to collect runoff before it enters the river. And that will cost Paris one and a half billion dollars to clean up the river. It's basically the most expensive toilet plunger ever. And that's not even the wildest part about this billion dollar cleanup. We love this move by Paris's So good, so good.

The mayor of Paris pledged to swim herself in the river before the Olympics as a demonstration of its safety. Plug your nose, don't open your eyes and just kick, baby, just kick. Marco! Marco! Where's Polo? But yet he's here's the big surprise of these Olympics. Despite that very high cost of the sewage upgrade to protect the river, the Paris Olympics is actually the lowest-cost Olympics inflation-adjusted.

In fact, Paris's Olympics are actually. expecting to profit. Most Olympics are a huge burden on public finances. Paris Olympics are going to bring a profit to the city. And how they did it is our takeaway. So Jack, what's the takeaway for our buddies over in the Paris Olympics? Paris represents the modern Olympic strategy. Use what's already there.

Yeties, the Beijing Olympics cost $40 billion. The Russian Olympics cost $55 billion. But the Paris Olympics this summer is expected to cost under $10 billion. Bessie's the Olympics and the World Cup, they've earned the unwanted reputation over the last couple decades. The dictator games. Yeah, because only authoritarian regimes can pay the enormous price tag necessary to host those games. On the other hand, Paris shows a different formula, an affordable formula. Use what's already there. And here's how Paris did it. 95% of the infrastructure is already built in Paris or will be built for temporary at low-cost use. So no

giant taxpayer-funded stadiums that will be used once during the Olympics, but then never again. And 96% of the Paris Olympics budget is actually from the private sector. $1 billion in corporate sponsors, huge TV revenue from the IOC, and very expensive tickets to watch live in Paris. So, we-wee, Paris is cleaning up their river for $1.5 billion, but actually, we think that's pretty cheap. Because Paris represents the modern Olympic funding strategy. What's already there.

Just use what's already there. It is possible. Now a quick word from our sponsor. For our third and final story, one of the biggest startups in the world is one that you've never heard of. Because this is the only Wall Street company run by British spies.

Before we get into the story, everyone knows the James Bond movies. But pro tip, read the James Bond books. Something Nick my stepfather have in common? Really? I didn't know David did that. You love those Ian Fleming novels. I love those. I've read most of them. And actually, Jack, I don't know I've told you this. It's a quick beat tree, right? A hundred pages? It's like 150, 200 pages. And actually, I collect them because they're beautiful. The cover of Goldfinger is a stunning cover. I've been collecting them

the last few. Cover of Goldfinger. I'm hoping their investments. So your collection. Yeah, he's getting on this market. Help my asset go on. Can you add that to your will for me? Yes. Jack, you get my first edition, James Bond, Ian Fleming, Goldfinger. I'm holding it to that. It's on the record. Yeties. But Yeties, here's the story. Jack and I just learned about a company that is basically the James Bond of financial firms. This company was founded by MI6 Spies. And who is MI6, Jack? M.I.6 is England's equivalent of the CIA. And Yetis, this spy startup is actually got the biggest market share in all of consulting. Because according to Bloomberg reporting, this secretive firm advises 40% of the world's life.

largest companies. And also, according to Bloomberg reporting, they advise 75% of the world's top 20 private equity firms. Yeties. This is the 007 of consulting. Yeah, it's like a bond worked at Bain. Or like a Moneypenny worked at McKinsey. Yes. Uh-huh. They work with the big money. They work with the smart money. They got 200 employees. They're in 13 different countries, and yet, you have never heard of them. They've been around for 30 years. You didn't know it. And I didn't know it. Because they're that good at their job. They were lurking. in the shadows. That's from Skyfall, isn't it?

That line. If I told you, Jack, I'd have to kill you. But Yeti's here's in the news. This spy business is launching a $50 million venture capital fund. That's right. This company is finally infiltrating Silicon Valley cap tables. But here's the funny thing. For the last 30 years,

this company's business hasn't been investing. It's been about connecting. The core service described in the website is market intelligence. Yes, market intelligence. Basically, the spies shifted from military intelligence to business intelligence. Yes, and a key asset is there, quote-unquote, international network of key people. For example, if an investor needs to meet with a startup for a deal, this company finds a connection.

If an executive needs to know how a key senator is leaning on an important vote, this company will find out. Besties, this company is setting up the meeting before the meeting after the meeting about the big thing. about the big thing that you didn't even know about. And the name of this company, yes, is not a secret. It's Hocklet. Are we allowed to say it out loud? Yes.

But your shushing just broke my ears. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. You should reveal the name of the company. I think it's safe. I think it's safe. I think it's safe. Hocklet. That's the name of this spy company. So, Jack, what's the shaken, not stirred takeaway for our buddies over at Hockland?

The greatest asset, not on a balance sheet, is information. Yeties, information is the advantage that every business wants and will pay for. And information that no one else has is the information they'll pay a premium for. Knowing how a politician is going to vote on regulation first, that is a competitive advantage.

Knowing that a rival is building a factory first, that's a competitive advantage. So, interestingly, a huge area for Hocklet is actually mergers and acquisitions. There are 200 people find out what the other side is thinking. The client may be wondering, should we up our offer? Or are they bluffing? Hocklet's spies will find out.

Because Hocklet's business isn't digital, it's actually physical. They make phone calls, they'll eavesdrop at a party to get non-public information that doesn't cross the line of illegal insider information. Because information is the greatest asset not on a balance sheet. Jack, can you whip up the takeaways for us for the real Friday? Lulu Lemon's sales growth has slowed eight quarters in a row. We think they need to expand their practice.

Because great brands own occasions. Lulu already owns the morning. Now they should own the evening. For our second story, the Paris Olympics are using their dirty river for two events. So they're spending $1.5 billion to clean it up. But Paris found a formula for affordable Olympics. Use what's already there.

And our third and final story is Hacklet. It's an incredibly successful consulting firm because they're staffed by former spies. And because information is the greatest asset not on a balance sheet. Put that on your LinkedIn today. But Yeties, this pod's not over yet. Here's what else you need to know today. First, the European Central Bank and the Bank of Canada, both just announced interest rate cuts in the past two days. It's a sign that inflation is easing in Canada and in the European Union.

It's a good sign for global inflation. And it put some pressure on the United States to follow suit. And second, SpaceX's starship, which could eventually bring people to Mars just completed a very successful test. After exploding a few times post-launch in previous tests, this starship went all the way up into outer space and then all the way down into the ocean. Right into the ocean. It's a big one-upping of Boeing's successful launch just the day before. And finally, Jamie Diamond. is the CEO of J.P. Morgan Chase, but he also may become a knight of England.

That's right, because the Prime Minister of the United Kingdom, Rishi Sunak, just proposed knighting America's big bank CEO, according to reports. And what's the reason for knighting J.P. Morgan's CEO, Jack? We were scratching our head, then we realized it. It's probably to remind the world that Britain is a financial hub despite Brexit. It's probably that. But the next time you walk into a J.P. Morgan meeting, Tell him to sheathe his sword.

Yeah, that's Sir Jamie Diamond. Henceforth, Fort Worth. He will behead you. Now, time for the best fact yet. This one sent in by Yeti, Aaron McConnell from lovely Mission Viejo, California. Bush and Platt. Here we go. Here's a fun fact.

Dr. Pepper's first slogan was indeed, drink a bite to eat at 10, 2, and 4. Does it make total sense now? Not really. But at the time, when an ad campaign request put out by the brand after research in the 1920s showed people generally suffered from a sugar low at 10 a.m., 2 a.m. and 4 p.m. Hence the need for sugary beverage like Dr. Pepper to get you going.

Cheers. Drink a bite to eat? Yeah, I think it doesn't make sense. I mean, the one thing it does make sense is they said that's when you're on a sugar low. And considering this has 65 grams of sugar, it would definitely solve the sugar law. I think they meant to say drink a sip to drink. Yeah, Jack is still fuming and filled up and running and bouncing off the walls from yesterday's Siparoo. Yeah, what happened after my first two Dr. Pepper's yesterday was wild, and we actually posted a video about it at T-Boy Pot on Instagram.

Check it out on Instagram. And tonight, Jack is having a boba tea made with Dr. Pepper. That's not what I signed up for. Well, that's what you're having. The tapioca balls are going in the Dr. Pepper. Yet is, you've looked fantastic all week. Los Angeles, you've looked lovely. My palate has been massively expanded while I've been here.

Jack had his first sushi hand roll last night. That's true. Did you like it? It was great, right? First Dr. Pepper. Yeah. First sushi hand roll. First bobatin.

It was aggressive. We had some tecumaki. Jack went with the salmon belly. Skin. Salmon skin. Salmon skin. Yes, he did salmon skin. It was pretty intense.

It was wonderful. It was delicious. It was very good. I'd like that one. Yides, if you haven't yet subscribe to our weekly newsletter, you'd get it tomorrow if you subscribe right now. We got a link in the episode description. And Nick and I,

We'll see you next week. Celebrate some wins, and we'll see you Monday. And before we go, a shout out to Gabriel Caputo, turning one year old in Santa Ana, California. Gabriel's mom was listening to the best one yet when she found out she was pregnant. And now Gabriel is having his first birthday. Congratulations to Mom and congrats to Gabriel.

And happy fourth birthday to Regan in Brooklyn, Wisconsin, who's on the way to daycare. Just going to crush it building those blocks today. You got this, Regan. Dalton Bo Pres in Honolulu, Hawaii is enjoying a Bachelor weekend in Kauai. That's a place I want to be right now. To Shavie. And happy birthday to Jeanette Pagan in Puerto Rico.

Your BFF misses you big time. And Wolf the Pomeino is turning three years old in Phoenix celebrating with Jessica and Corbyn because that's how Wolf celebrates. And happy birthday to Colleen Neuantz Fonder in Columbus, Ohio. Chocolate cake for breakfast, every breakfast of the week. Colleen, sorry if I overly Germanized that last name, but Noy and Schfander is a great last name. Donka, donka, Jack, and Joel Fernandez in Chicago. Isn't just doing logistics? That father, too, just passed his CPA exam. And congratulations to Robbie Dobinsky, in Annapolis, Maryland, who just graduated from Northwestern.

And Tom Wong, a faithful Yeti since 2020, has got a birthday in Denver, Colorado. Happy birthday, Tom. And congratulations to Savannah Westwood. in Orlando, Florida, who's celebrating her nine-year work aversary at the Savvy Sitter. The Savvy Sitter is going to hit the decade and keep on grown, baby. And to anyone else who's celebrating something today, make it a T-boy. Celebrate the wins. This is Jack. Nick owned stock of Lulu Lemon, and I own stock of Abercrombie and Fitch. They're hosting the marathon swimming and triathlon events.

Is it the sane? Send. Send. Like send? Without the day. Oh, my God. Thank you. Tames is even harder.

I don't know if I'm saying. That doesn't make sense. That's just stupid.