The Bible in a Year (with Fr. Mike Schmitz) - Day 293: Discipline Grounded in Love (2023)

Episode Date: October 20, 2023

Fr. Mike focuses on the theme of disciplining children, reflected in our readings from Sirach and Proverbs today. He clarifies that there is a crucial difference between discipline and destruction, and emphasizes that disciplining children should always be grounded in love and oriented towards their success in the future. Today's readings 1 Maccabees 12, Sirach 30-31, and Proverbs 23:13-16. For the complete reading plan, visit ascensionpress.com/bibleinayear. Please note: The Bible contains adult themes that may not be suitable for children - parental discretion is advised.

Hi, my name is Father Mike Schmitz, and you're listening to the Bible in a Year podcast, where we encounter God's voice and live life through the lens of Scripture. The Bible in a Year podcast is brought to you by Ascension. Using the Great Adventure Bible Timeline, we'll read all the way from Genesis to Revelation, discovering how the story of salvation unfolds and how we fit into that story today. It is day 293, and we're reading today 1 Maccabees chapter 12, Sirach chapter 30 and 31, as well as Proverbs chapter 23, verses 13 through 16. As always, the Bible translation I am

reading from is the Revised Standard Version, Second Catholic Edition. I'm using the Great Adventure Bible from Ascension. If you want to download your own Bible in a Year reading plan, you can visit ascensionpress.com slash Bible in a Year. You can also subscribe to this podcast by clicking on subscribe and receiving daily episodes and daily updates. If you did, you would know that today is day 293. We're reading 1 Maccabees chapter 12, Sirach chapter 30 and 31, as well as Proverbs chapter 23 verses 13 through 16. The first book of Maccabees chapter 12, alliances with Rome and Sparta. Now, when Jonathan saw that the time was favorable for him, he chose men and sent them to Rome to confirm and renew their friendship with them.

He also sent letters to the same effect to the Spartans and to other places. So they went to Rome and entered the Senate chamber and said, Jonathan, the high priest, and the Jewish nation have sent us to renew the former friendship and alliance with them. And the Romans gave them letters to the people in every place,

asking them to provide for the envoys' safe conduct to the land of Judah. This is a copy of the letter which Jonathan wrote to the Spartans. Jonathan the high priest, the senate of the nation, the priests, and the rest of the Jewish people to their brethren the Spartans, greeting. Already in time past, a letter was sent to Onias the high priest from Arius, who was king among you, stating that you are our brethren, as the appended copy shows. Onias welcomed the envoy with honor and received the letter, which contained a clear declaration of alliance and friendship. Therefore, though we have no need of these things, since we have as encouragement the holy books which are in our hands,

we have undertaken to send to renew our brotherhood and friendship with you, so that we may not become estranged from you, for considerable time has passed since you sent your letter to us. We therefore remember you constantly on every occasion, both in our feasts and on other appropriate days, at the sacrifices which we offer and in our prayers, as it is right and proper to remember brethren, and we rejoice in your glory. But as for ourselves, many afflictions and many wars have encircled us. The kings round about us have waged war against us. We were unwilling to annoy you and our other allies and friends with these wars, for we have the help which comes from heaven for our aid. And we were delivered from our enemies,

and our enemies were humbled. We therefore have chosen Numenias, the son of Antiochus, and Antipater, the son of Jason, and have sent them to Rome to renew our former friendship and alliance with them. We have commanded them to go also to you, and greet you, and deliver to you this letter from us concerning the renewal of our brotherhood. And now, please send us a reply to this. This is a copy of the letter which they sent to Onias. Arius, king of the Spartans, to Onias the high priest, greeting. It has been found in writing concerning the Spartans and the Jews that they are brethren and are of the family of Abraham. And now that we have learned this, please write us concerning your welfare. We on our part

write to you that your cattle and your property belong to us and ours belong to you. We therefore command that our envoys report to you accordingly. Further campaigns of Jonathan and Simon. Now Jonathan heard that the commanders of Demetrius had returned with a larger force than before to wage war against him. So he marched away from Jerusalem and met them in the region of Hamath, for he gave them no opportunity to invade his own country. He sent spies to their camp, and they returned and reported to him

that the enemy were being drawn up in formation to fall upon the Jews by night. So when the sun had set, Jonathan commanded his men to be alert and to keep their arms at hand so as to be ready all night for battle, and he stationed outposts around the camp. When the enemy heard that Jonathan and his men were prepared for battle, they were afraid and were terrified at heart, so they kindled fires in their camp and withdrew. But Jonathan and his

men did not know it until morning, for they saw the fires burning. Then Jonathan pursued them, but he did not overtake them, for they had crossed the Eleutherus river. So Jonathan turned aside against the Arabs, who are called Zabadeans, and he crushed them and plundered them. Then he broke camp, and went to Damascus, and marched through all that region. Simon also went forth and marched through the country as far as Ascalon and the neighboring strongholds. He turned aside to Joppa and took it by surprise, for he had heard that they were ready to hand over the stronghold to the men whom Demetrius had sent. And he stationed a garrison there to guard it. When Jonathan returned, he convened the elders of the people and planned with them to build

strongholds in Judea, to build the walls of Jerusalem still higher, and to erect a high barrier between the citadel and the city to separate it from the city, in order to isolate it so that its garrison could neither buy nor sell. So they gathered together to build up the city. Part of the wall on the valley to the east had fallen and he repaired the section called Shephanatha. And Simon built Adida in the Shephala. He fortified it and installed gates with bolts. Trifo captures Jonathan. Then Trifo attempted to become king of Asia and put on the crown and to raise his hand against Antiochus the king. He feared that Jonathan might not permit him

to do so, but might make war on him, so he kept seeking to seize and kill him, and he marched forth and came to Bet-shan. Jonathan went out to meet him with 40,000 picked fighting men, and he came to Bet-shan. When Trifo saw that he had come with a large army, he was afraid to raise his hand against him, so he received him with honor and commended him to all his friends, and he gave him gifts and commanded his friends and his troops to obey him as they would himself. Then he said to Jonathan, Why have you wearied all these people when we are not at war? Dismiss them now to their homes, and choose for yourself a few men to stay with you, and come with me to Ptolemaeus. I will hand it over to you as well as the other strongholds

and the remaining troops and all the officials, and will turn round and go home, for that is why I am here. Jonathan trusted him and did as he said. He sent away the troops, and they returned to the land of Judah. He kept with himself 3,000 men, 2,000 of whom he left in Galilee while a thousand accompanied him. But when Jonathan entered Ptolemaeus, the men of Ptolemaeus closed the gates and seized him and all who had entered with him, they killed with the sword. Then Trifo sent troops and cavalry into Galilee and the great plain to destroy all Jonathan's soldiers. But they realized that Jonathan had been seized and had perished along with his men

and they encouraged one another and kept marching in close formation, ready for battle. When their pursuers saw that they would fight for their lives, they turned back. So they all reached the land of Judah safely and they mourned for Jonathan and his companions and were in great fear and all Israel mourned deeply. And all the nations round about them

tried to destroy them, for they said, They have no leader or helper. Now therefore let us make war on them and blot out the memory of them from among men. The Book of Sirach, Chapter 30. Discipline of Children, Right Attitudes. He who loves his son will whip him often, in order that he may rejoice at the way he turns out. He who disciplines his son will profit by him and will boast of him among acquaintances. He who teaches his son will make his enemies envious

and will glory in him in the presence of friends. The father may die, but yet he is not dead, for he has left behind him one like himself. While alive he saw and rejoiced, and when he died he was not grieved. He has left behind him an avenger against his enemies, for one to repay the kindness of his friends. He who spoils his son will bind up his wounds, and his feelings will be troubled at every cry. A horse that is untamed turns out to be stubborn, and a son unrestrained turns out to be willful. Pamper a child, and he will frighten you. Play with him, and he will give you grief.

Do not laugh with him, lest you have sorrow with him, and in the end you will gnash your teeth. Give him no authority in his youth, and do not ignore his errors. Bow down his neck in his youth, and beat his sides while he is young, lest he become stubborn and disobey you, and you have sorrow of soul from him. Discipline your son and take pains with him, that you may not be offended by his shamelessness.

Better off is a poor man who is well and strong in constitution than a rich man who is severely afflicted in body Health and soundness are better than all gold and a robust body than countless riches There is no wealth better than health of body and there is no gladness above joy of heart Death is better than a miserable life and eternal rest than chronic sickness

Good things poured out upon a mouth that is closed are like offerings of food placed upon a grave. Of what use to an idol is an offering of fruit? For it can neither eat nor smell. So is he who is afflicted by the Lord. He sees with his eyes and groans like a eunuch who embraces a maiden and groans. Do not give yourself over to sorrow, and do not afflict yourself deliberately. Gladness of heart is the life of man, and the rejoicing of a man is length of days. Delight your soul and comfort your heart, and remove sorrow far from you, for sorrow has destroyed many, and there is no profit in it. Jealousy and anger shorten life, and anxiety brings an old age too soon.

A man of cheerful and good heart will give heed to the food he eats. Chapter 31. Right Conduct. Wakefulness over wealth wastes away one's flesh, and anxiety about it removes sleep. Wakeful anxiety prevents slumber, and a severe illness carries off sleep. Wakeful anxiety prevents slumber and a severe illness carries off sleep. The rich man toils as his wealth accumulates, and when he rests he finds himself with his dainties. The poor man toils as his livelihood diminishes, and when he rests he becomes needy. He who loves gold will not be justified, and he who pursues money will be led astray by it.

Many have come to ruin because of gold, and their destruction has met them face to face. It is a stumbling block to those who are devoted to it, and every fool will be taken captive by it. Blessed is the rich man who is found blameless, and who does not go after gold. Who is he? And we will call him blessed, for he has done wonderful things among his people. Who has been tested by it and been found perfect, let it be for him a ground for boasting. Who has had the power to transgress and did not transgress, and to do evil and did not do it, his prosperity will be established, and the assembly will relate his acts of charity. Are you seated at the table of a great man? Do not be greedy at it, and do not say, there is certainly much upon it. Remember that a greedy eye is a bad thing. What has been created

more greedy than the eye? Therefore it sheds tears from every face. Do not reach out your hand for everything you see, and do not crowd your neighbor at the dish. Judge your neighbor's feelings by your own, and in every matter be thoughtful. Eat like a human being what is set before you, and do not chew greedily lest you be hated. Be the first to stop eating for the sake of good manners, and do not be insatiable lest you give offense. If you are seated among many persons,

do not reach out your hand before they do. How ample a little is for a well-disciplined man. He does not breathe heavily upon his bed. Healthy sleep depends on moderate eating. He rises early and feels fit. The distress of sleeplessness and of nausea and colic are with the glutton. If you are overstuffed with food, get up in the middle of the meal and you will have relief. Listen to me, my son, and do not disregard me, and in the end you will appreciate my words. In all your work be industrious, and no sickness will overtake you. Men will praise the one who is liberal with food, and their testimony to his excellence is trustworthy. The city will complain of the

one who is miserly with food, and their testimony to his miserliness is accurate. Do not aim to be valiant over wine, for wine has destroyed many. Fire and water prove the temper of steel, so wine tests hearts in the strife of the proud. Wine is like life to men, if you drink it in moderation. What is life to a man who is without wine? It has been created to make men glad. Wine drunk in season and temperately is rejoicing of heart and gladness of soul. Wine drunk to excess is bitterness of soul, with provocation and stumbling. Drunkenness increases the anger of a fool to his injury, reducing his strength and adding wounds. Do not reprove your neighbor at a banquet of wine, and do not despise him in his merrymaking. Speak no word of reproach to him, and do not afflict him by making demands of him.

The book of Proverbs chapter 23 verses 13 through 16. Do not withhold discipline from a child. If you beat him with a rod, he will not child. If you beat him with a rod, he will not die. If you beat him with the rod, you will save his life from Sheol. My son, if your heart is wise, my heart too will be glad. My soul will rejoice when your lips speak what is right. Father in heaven, we give you praise and glory. Thank you so much for this gift. Thank you for your word. Thank you for revealing your heart to us. And gosh, God, you are a good dad and you discipline us. Help us to receive correct and right discipline. Help us to offer correct and right discipline when it is our responsibility to do so. In Jesus' name we pray. Amen. In the

name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen. We're coming back to that discipline thing in just a second, because it was kind of a theme in both Sirach and in Proverbs today. So it's kind of like the Lord's trying to tell us something. But first, Maccabees. First Maccabees chapter 12 once today. And gosh, okay, again, once again, like we mentioned yesterday, is all the other narrative books of the Bible, all the other narrative books of the Bible, all the other historical books of the Bible. They tell us the point. Here is what you need to pay attention to. Here is how God is acting in this. And yet here in 1 Maccabees, it is just telling us the details. It's just giving us the data. And the data is people in power want to stay in power. And not

everyone in power who says they're trustworthy is actually trustworthy. And so we have not only, you know, the lines with the Spartans and renewal of the alliance with the Romans, but you also have Jonathan's death at the hand of Trifo. And you have Simon next tomorrow in chapter 13, Simon is going to take command of the Maccabeans, Maccabees. And he's going to, so remember where there's Judas and his brother, Jonathan and other brother, Simon are going to be the ones who are kind of continuing to lead this battle and fighting the people around them. Oh gosh.

Okay. So let's take the step. Let's go back to chapter 30 of Sirach, verse one. He who loves his son will whip him often in order that he may rejoice at the way he turns out. He who disciplines his son will profit by him and will that he may rejoice at the way he turns out. He who disciplines his son will profit by him and will boast of him among his acquaintances. He who teaches his son will make his enemies envious and will glory in him in the presence of friends. Now, one of the

things we have to recognize, and also Proverbs, Proverbs says what? Do not withhold discipline from a child. If you beat him with a rod, he won't die. Like basically, hey, it's going to be fine. He's not going to kill him. Now, let's keep this in mind that there is a difference between discipline. There's a difference between spanking someone, as we know this, with the rod. Here's all the things. And beating up, right? There's a difference between discipline and destruction.

There's a massive difference. And whenever it's kind of like the ways in which when the bible talks about again there's times of slavery in the bible and when the bible is talking about slavery it's not talking about this kind of chattel slavery where you own the property the person as property never talking about that well unless it's one of the oppressive nations around israel but even slavery in israel is not slavery slavery it is more like indentured servitude where after seven years, you get set free and you're working actually for a point you'd not owned by a person. You are simply working for them and they're caring for you. And so it's a whole different

kind of thing. So same kind of thing when it comes to discipline, when it comes to sparing the rod, spoiling the child, this whole kind of a situation, it is not beating a child. This is discipline. And we have to, if that's tough for us to wrap our minds around, then we just need to fight for it because this is the whole point. The whole point is offering one's child or one's children discipline, not beating them up. Okay, keep that in mind.

That is never the case, never ever the case. Because why? The discipline is oriented towards the child's growing up to be a good human being. This is one of the roles of parents is to help the children become a good human being. Now, it could be the situation where you say, okay, but in this day and age, we don't necessarily beat anyone or spank anyone. It might be a timeout kind of a situation.

Great. Phenomenal. That's awesome. That is great. And if that works, that is completely wonderful. Again, keep this in mind. The Bible's not encouraging beating up or injuring another human being, one's child, for the sake of discipline. But it is saying we have to teach our kids. We have to teach our children. Why? Again, the point is not so that you are able to vent your anger out on your child.

That's awful. The point is there are pieces in us that need to be shaped. There are things in us that we're inclined to do that we need to stop being inclined to do. In fact, there's a, this is for all of us, right? And so anyone who's in authority over me, they'll have to tell me things. For example, my bishop, at one point, a number of weeks ago, we had a meeting

and at one point he said, okay, Father Mike, I need you to do this. This is your priority this week. And I was like, okay, yeah. And he's like, no, no, no, listen. This is your number one thing you need to do. Basically making it very, very clear that it wasn't kind of a semi-request.

It was, this is, you need to do this. This is very serious. I am asking you to do this. I'm telling you to do this. This is not an invitation. This is a command. Oh, got it. Now, if I have grown up in such a way where I take when people tell me what to do the wrong way and I rebel against that, then I'm of no use to my bishop. I'm also of no use to myself. I'm of no use to the people around me if all I can do is my own will, right? So there's a sense of being needing to be trained in this way. Again, keep in mind, gosh, if your mind keeps going back to beating someone up, beating a child, that is not ever what the scriptures or the church is talking about at all. But it's kind of like what I've heard a

clinical psychologist, he had a rule. One of his rules was, he says, never let your kids do anything that makes you dislike them. He has a book and he has a bunch of rules in it. And never let your kids do anything that makes you dislike them. And at first glance, that rule sounds really strange. Like, wait, is that even possible? And he points out, he says, yes, in my clinical practice, I've seen very many patients or parents who end up resenting their children because they haven't corrected them. They haven't, they've let them get away with so many things that here's what happens. Not only do you dislike your children, but here's the next thing is if you let your child

get away with things that make you dislike them, what happens when they are out in the world where people don't have to love them, right? People don't have any natural affection for them. Here's what happens. He says, he says on the playground with their peers, they're isolated because no one wants to play with a kid who's a brat, right? No one wants to play with a kid who is incapable of thinking of someone else or sharing or whatever the thing is. So the goal is not just, I don't like this behavior in my child. I'm going to want, I want them to behave the way I want them to behave. It's, I will not let my child get away with anything that makes me dislike them because that will make it even more difficult for

them to make friends. Secondly, is with other adults. What happens is if one's child is unlikable, right? Because they just get away with whatever, then other adults will smile at them, pat them on the head and can't wait to get away from them. And the child will see, oh, that's what adults are like. They're fake. They just smile, but they don't really care. On the other hand, if you help your child to be the kind of person who gets along with other kids, who actually knows how to interact with adults, then the kids will be happy to see them come. We'll be happy to play with them, even if there's disagreements and we'll want them as playmates and we'll actually invite them into a relationship, which is so important. And same thing when it comes to other adults, other adults will see them and say, oh,

I want to engage with this child, this young person, because well, they're not, they're not a Ruka salt, right? I want a new Palupa now, daddy, that kind of situation. Cause we've seen those kinds of kids. And it's the job of a parent is to help them be the kind of person that can make friends and the kind of person that can interact with adults they can engage with the world around them does that make sense and that's the whole point and also to be a virtuous human being that's also the other point um gosh that makes i hope that makes sense because it makes sense to me. Um, and so whether that's through the rod or my, we had a paddle when we were growing up, you know, the paddle ball games, that's what my mom used to spank us with. It just stung a little bit, right? No damage

is done. It's just kind of like a little sharp little thing, but also it was the threat of that that was more than anything. She had the little paddle ball game, you know, between, uh, we had cupboards that had little, uh, knobs to open the cupboard doors and she put it in between those two knobs, like a little holster. And she'd walk when we were acting up during supper or something, she'd walk over to that area. She all, she didn't have to pick it up. She just walked over to the general area that the paddle was at. And she were like, Oh, here she comes. There she goes. You know, she's going to get the paddle and we just calm down. It worked for us, but I know my siblings, they have timeouts. They don't, they rarely, I don't know if I've ever seen them spank their kids and have really, really great kids because whatever it is, the point is discipline

is good for us. It doesn't have to be physical violence. It can simply be that timeout, simply be here's the consequences of your actions. Because why? Because I discipline you now and it costs you as a parent, right? As a parent, I discipline you now so that later on you can be the kind of person who, here scripture says, doesn't go to hell, but you can be the kind of person who has the virtue needed to help the people around you and help yourself because you recognize that discipline is oriented towards success in the future. That's what it's supposed to be, at least, even though many of us have experienced not that kind of discipline. Anyways,

I rambled on for not enough time here because I think I want to keep making sure that you don't think I'm advocating in any way, shape, or form beating up people, including your children. Don't beat your children. That is horrible. And here's the thing. I'm laughing at this only because I'm separated from it and I'm trying to say this is not what I'm saying, but this is a large community. And when we talk about things like discipline or sparing the rod or using the rod or discipline, I know many people who are listening,

this is your history, your experience of life has been to be treated horribly. That unlike my mom who had the little, you know, paddle, yours was something far, far worse, far, far worse. For me, spanking was unpleasant, but it did the trick. For you, what your parents might've called spanking was actually beating. you, what your parents might've called spanking was actually beating. And so this can be a really hard thing to hear. Just only let you know two things. That is not what scripture is talking about. It's not talking about beating. What you experienced was not godly. It was not of the Lord. And secondly, you're loved. What you experienced was not from the Lord. It was from a broken human

being, maybe doing their best, maybe doing their very best to quote unquote, raise you right. But that's not the Lord's way. And secondly, no matter what happened in your past, it matters and you matter and you're loved. Does that make sense? Again, kind of joking about the whole discipline stuff, but really also coming to the reality that my experience of spanking was like a good, it's probably the best experience of spanking you possibly could have. But that's not everyone's experience

and know that you're not alone. A lot of people walking with us who, yeah, you had different experience. And so we're praying for you because to get past that and to be able to heal and to say yep that was wrong but here I am I'm moving forward that was wrong but here I am moving forward you matter it matters and you're loved I hope that makes sense uh because we are praying for you and I'm please pray for me because uh yeah we're all in this

together even though we have very different experiences with each other, God is calling us all on the same road to get close to him as best we can. So I'm praying for you. Please pray for me. My name is Father Mike. I cannot wait to see you tomorrow. God bless.