The Biggest Problem in the Universe: Uncucked - Bonus Episode 12

Episode Date: June 7, 2018

Welcome to the biggest solution in the universe, the show where we discuss every solution in the universe from boxes to cans With over 4 million downloads This is the only show where you decide what should or shouldn't be on the big list of solutions I'm Maddox with me as dick Fuck boxes and Sean our audio engineer All righty All right canvassing guys we did it This is our one year Solutions anniversary

Whoa, yeah, whoa 12 episodes of Solutions Yeah, nobody thought we could do it we started Did we fix all the world's problems? Let's honestly look at our list of solutions. Okay. Do we have a shot? Because now thinking back, I'm wondering if we fixed all the world's problems,

I'm thinking of the solutions we brought in, and I'm thinking, absolutely not. I think we missed a couple big ones. Well, you know, I think we should have been a little bit more rigorous on what is a solution. We got to know for sure what is a solution. Wait, that's the right grammar, isn't it? What is the solution?

No, that's right. That one's right. I know it's the format of the joke, but it is right. But we need to know what the solutions are. We need to know all the list of solutions that we can find out the biggest. Look, guys, the show's going to go on infinitely. So over the course of time, we'll converge towards that solution. We'll become asymptotically close, and we'll find it.

And it's only going to go on infinitely because of you guys. Yes. Thank you for buying the episodes. Thank you for supporting the show. Thank you for making it possible for us to bring in bits, for us to pay Sean. Sean, you really owe everyone and thanks more than anyone else. You know what? I was going to say that without your prodding.

Well, I mean, maybe we'll never know. Yep. We'll never know. Unless that clip, that segment magically gets mysteriously gets deleted. Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. It could, no, seriously, thank you, though. It does allow them to pay me. Yeah, Sean, by the way, Sean.

And if you like what we do at all, or what I do at all, thank you. Yeah, Sean, that's a sincere thanks from all of us, guys. We didn't think that the show would be as wildly successful as it is. Well, they didn't. I did. You did, of course. Of course I did. I predicted every success I will have ever had or have had.

Oh, wait, so much weight. And you must be on your shoulders. All these successes. Heavy lies ahead, buddy. That's right. Crown. Heavy lies head with the crown. Oh.

Baring the crown, yeah. Is that the saying? I think so. Okay. It's along those lines. But you get the idea. Guys, we're paying our illustrators. We're paying our transcribers.

We're paying Sean. We are keeping the lights on. We were doing this in the dark before. No, that's true. No lights. That's true. Actually, that is true. We were doing it in the dark.

Yeah, we're, look, for season two, if you guys resubscribe, we're going to do an additional episode. Yes. Yeah, we're going to give you guys an additional episode. So it's 13 episodes for the next season. season. We are going to cure cancer in our next season. Yeah. It's going to literally be the biggest solution in the universe. But only on the 13th episode. Only on, no, only on the 24th episode. Yeah, I'm at the 13th for this year. Oh, no, no, you mean for the next year? Yeah, only in the next

season. Guys, yeah, so thanks a lot. This has been great. If you like what you're listening to, resubscribe, tell a friend, buy this for a friend. Buy this for an enemy. Buy two for yourself. You know? Double fist. The Solutions episodes. You know what? Send one to another email address in case you lose the other one. Pay twice. Pay with Bitcoins. It's fun to spend Bitcoin. Look, Bitcoins are totally worthless. You can't buy anything with them. Spend them on our episodes. Give them to us.

And you finally get to use them and prove all your libertarian principles correct. Right? That's what they're for. Like the two weirdos like in South America working for the CIA who are listening to the show who don't want to like use credit cards. They're paying us with Bitcoins. So, okay, guys. You know what, can I tell you a funny story about that? Yeah, what's up? So this kid, I don't want this to get out on the regular episode,

but this kid sends me this big email sob story about how he's broke and he's young, and he doesn't have a credit card and he's in Argentina. And so he can't. Like, he doesn't have access to buy the bonus episodes. He's like, ah, dude, here. I'll give you the bonus episode. That's cool. Yeah.

I've done that too. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, okay. You know. Every now and, you know, if someone's really hard on their luck. Yeah. I'm never going to do it again, though, now that that's out.

Wait, how many times has this been done? Sean. You're still getting paid, Sean. Don't worry about it, Sean. So that kid... With a C-H. Oh, I should get his name. I wrote it down for the other episode.

Let me get it real fast. Javier Marco. So he sends me this email out of the blue that he wrote... He did a remix of the song for the Problems episode. You want to hear it? Hear a little bit of it. Yeah, it's really cool. Let's hear it.

That sounds awesome. Yeah, here you go. This is from Javier. Right? Oh, I get it, yeah. Yeah. How cool is that? That's badass.

Wow, that's really cool. Huh. It's like a chip tune version of our intro. I mean, it goes on forever, so. Yeah. Yeah, you can't stop it. I want to hear it all throughout this episode. For real.

It's awesome. Hey, Javier, I got some work for you, buddy. We should work. I need some chip tune stuff, actually. Cool, this is really cool It's pretty cool Yeah, really cool stuff I also have a song Dick

This is from Some smart-ass song It's from Waterboy All right Yeah I love him Yeah He's provided several

Several songs we've played on the show He lives in Vegas You should meet him at your game show I'm going to So what Waterboy did Is he took this podcast And then created a trailer For a fake buddy cop film

Starring you and I Dick And Sean You make a Well, you know, I'll just play the club. Listen to this. It's our buddy cop trailer for the movie. Here it is. This Christmas in the LAPD.

Listen to me. So I'm assigning you a new partner. What? Why? You need to start following the rules like the rest of us. Say hi to your new partner. Hey, what's up, buddy? This is bullshit.

Together, they attempt to fight crime. What's going on? You're like that moron who joins a counterstrike server and just spins around, shooting everything with a shotgun. I'm there with a fucking sniper, buddy. One bullet, one kill. Uh-oh. But they're about to come across one of the most heinous criminals the police force has ever seen.

One story the guys told me the story I believe was from his days in Turkey. They realized that to be in power, you just needed the will to do what the other guy wouldn't. We have some breaking news. Five people killed over the past nine days. Sexual assault. Armed robbery, assault, and theft charges. Unexpected gas! What?

Maddox. Dick Masterson. Asterioskoconos. What did you say? What the hell? Oh, my God. I'm seriously asking what's wrong with you, moron? Are you talking to me?

Faye the fucking police, or we'll kill you. How soon do we get to total chaos? The more power I have. That's it, yeah. Where was Sean? Oh, I mistook a serious for Sean. So easy to confuse. How did that happen?

Sean's the IT guy behind the scenes. You always have the hacker montage there. Also, he used some clips from Kung Fury, the Kung Fury trailer. Oh. That chief at the beginning is like, we're signing you a new partner. That's from Kung Fury. I see. I heard the usual suspects in there.

Yeah, I did. Yeah. That's my buddy David Sandberg made Kung Fury. Yeah. I actually helped write a little bit of that short, the trailer. The movie? Yeah. Kung Fury?

Who blinded you write? I helped write some of the Nazi dialogue back and forth. You know they were talking about the mustaches. David Sandberg is funny. He sent me an email. Well, like, we talked back and forth, and I, like, as soon as I saw the Kung Fury trailer, even before it started going viral, I sent the guy a message. I'm like, dude, huge fan of this. I almost never do this.

I want to work with you. I rarely reach out to people I want to work with. And I'm like, you're one of these guys because, like, tone, the tonally, it was perfect. I wouldn't have changed anything in that trailer. And he reached out to me. He's like, yeah, man, I'm a huge fan of your stuff, too. So when he came out to Los Angeles, doing all his meetings and stuff, we hung out. And, yeah, we talked about this.

And so, like, seven days before the trailer came out, he's like, hey, I need some help with this dialogue, let's punch it up a bit. So, yeah, it was really fun. It turned out great, too, right? I wish you would have got to write a love scene. I did, actually. I did write, I did write, I wrote a script, like, kind of a spec script for him to show him, like, what a scene would look like.

And I did write a love scene with, like, a robot, a cybernetic ninja. Did that get into the movie? It did not, no. Okay, okay, this is what I'm begging you, please, for the next season. can we get someone to read the lines of your love scene from the movie Bags of Sand, the romantic, erotic journey. Please, let's have somebody read that scene, please.

Dick, as a great lover of many women, I wouldn't know what a bag of sand feels like, all right? I've only felt breasts. You don't know what a bag of sand feels like? No, I've never held a bag of sand. Every time I want to hold a bag of sand, it turns into a boob. Unbelievable. Whenever I'm helping people with floods, they come by, you're like, hey, Maddox, come here, and they instantly just turn to boobs.

Right in your hands. Get this guy out of here. Everything you touch turns of tits. It's like water to wine. Big old saggy tits blocking the flood. Do you want to open this package or should we get to the solutions? Well, we got a package here. Who's it from? Someone sent Dick a package.

Yeah, this is from Rauno Kengis. We read his comments a number of times. Yeah, he's a commenter, a big fan of the show. Gentlemen, I was supposed to send this parcel to you in order to celebrate the announcing of Maddox's new book, but unfortunately I suffer from NGSDS, not getting shit done syndrome. Oh, damn it.

So I just got to it now. That's okay. Maddox is the same way about his book, so it's fitting. Shit, fucking... In this package, I've included some spicy treats for you guys to enjoy if you happen to be coming down with some late-night munchies to find yourself in a long drive and don't want to resort

to guzzling gallons of hot sauce and making the car smell like piss and vinegar because you do do that. You guzzle hot sauce to stay awake, right? Do, do. Yeah, I do. Yeah. So here's what he sent us.

They're spicy candies. Maddox, you want to pop... They have a skull on. That we'll describe them. Oh, yeah. It's a manalan, make a set? Oh, it's a different language.

He's from the other side of the world, Rauno. Where is this made? This is from... Oh, it's finished. It's finished. This is a Finnish. It's called Maniland Mechisad, I guess, eritaine, telisia, caramelia, I guess, is how it's pronounced.

I'm going to eat this stuff. It's spicy candy. It's going right in my throat. This episode's going to sound great. Give it a shot. Yeah. I don't want to do it first because I'll embarrass myself. Oh, man, this is awesome, guys.

Holy cow. I got one. So this looks like, almost like those fruit candies that you find in your grandma's bowl. But it does. Yeah. Right it does, except it's coated with death. It's coated with death, apparently. There's like a raspberry one, a lemon one.

There's one that looks like an orange, a lime. You know, just like those old hard candies you find in your grandma's bowl. But I'm going to pop one in my mouth right now. I picked one that looks like a giant coffee bean. I'm going to put this in my mouth. Get those munching noises right up close to the microphone, too, so we know you're actually eating it. Sean, you got one too? I got a lemon one.

Is it spicy? Is it spicy enough for you? There it is, the kick is coming. It's got a nice kick. There it is. Yeah, it's got some cake. Is it good? Mm-hmm.

All right. Passes your test. He says, also, I've taken the liberty of including in a manuscript, which if studied with vigor and meditated upon, will help you guys avoid fuck-ups with bags. We'll help you guys avoid fuck-ups with bags of sand, three-inch dicklitz, piss, dribblets, and antibodies. The gummy bears are habanero infused, and the rest of the candies are spiced with various other chilies. Oh, Sean, did you get a gummy bear? Oh, I did. I got the gummy bears.

You want to taste the gummy bear? Yeah, here you go, here go. Okay. I'm spinning this one out for now. Let me try one of these gummy bears. There you go. So it starts out sweet. It's kind of interesting.

It's almost like the opposite of a sour. What are those? Sour Patch Kid. Yeah, Sour Patch Kid or a warhead. Yeah. Where they start out really sour and then they get sweet. This starts out sweet and gets really spicy. Oh, really?

Yeah, I don't know how they do that inside. Usually it's a coating. You know what? You're right. They start sweet and then they get spicy. They probably have, they probably mix the pepper in with the syrup that they make the candy with and then coat it with sugar. So that's probably why that happens. Oh, these gummy bears, they all look.

yellow and there's this gummy bear on the cover that has pierced ears. It looks like King Cooper. Yeah, he looks like King Cooper. He has Mohawk and he's shooting lasers out of his eyes. All right, let's try one of these guys. It says napalm Manali is what the covers, whatever that is in finish.

Oh, these guys are tiny too. It's tiny too. That means it's dangerous. Because the tiny ones have to evolve more power so they can fight off natural predators. Yeah. Okay, it starts out sweet. Here, Sean. We've got to try one of these since you're You can endure it if it's too spicy. I'll pass.

I like this. He's happy. It's really good, actually. I'll try one later. Sean doesn't eat whatever you tell him to eat for the sake of a show. If he's happy with the candy he's eating, he'll continue eating that candy, you motherfucker. That's what we know about Sean. That's what we got out of Sean.

So this candy, this gummy bear tastes like orange and it's really spicy. It's the same kind of heat that's from the other one. And it's a very neutral heat. I'll say that. It's a very even neutral heat because it doesn't have any. additional flavors to it. It's just heat. He's got one more present. I'm gonna let you open this one. It says open me last. This is the book that he's encouraging us to study. He got a book here. It's a dummies book. It says anatomy and

physiology for two dummies and he wrote the number two in white out on the cover. I said so he's implying both of us and then he has a bookmark in here. It says for Dick. Here Dick, go ahead and read this. There's a bookmark in here. It's, oh, it's bookmarked on the immune system. Living in a microbe jungle, because I fucked up antibiotics and antibodies. Yeah. I only did that either. All right.

Kingis, Kingis is the name, right? Yeah, he's got one for you as well. Oh, really? What's one for me? Come down. Let me see this. I don't need this. I don't need.

I know everything in that book. I know enough to write that book from memory. Oh, I would love to see that. Yeah. All right. The section he bookmarked for me, it's the urinary system cleaning up the act. other mechanisms of excretion structures of the urinary system

yeah I think it's the urinary system because you were saying you didn't know if women could pee with tampons in oh I see okay dickhead look man that's a natural question any guy has right? I'm not at 30 something you know what man thanks roundo

yeah thanks what's his name Rano Kangus? Well a good gift man everything's good except for that shit book don't eat it I know everything about the women's urinary tract infections. I know all that shit, man. John, can you pull some questions out of this? Pull some sex questions.

Okay, Sean, you take a look at that while we move on. I want to talk about the solutions. By the way, I chewed this candy because I'm really impatient. And it makes it way hotter. Oh, cool. Yeah, it's pretty damn hot. That's like me. I get hotter with age.

You get how we get chewing on? I'll give you something to chew on. I'll get hotter. You'll get hotter. Okay, guys, I got to go over this real quick. I just want to talk about the top 10 solutions according to, as of our 12th episode, our 12th bonus episode.

Here we go. Number one, biggest solution. Nuclear power. Nuclear fucking power, baby. That's our number one solution. Big time. Dick, real sloppy defensive nuclear power. That was my first day.

That was your first day. That's okay. We'll give you a pass for that. You know, first day? You didn't like my plan to cover blanket the earth in 15,000 nuclear power stations? That was ambitious. That was a Trumpian plan.

If I've ever heard one that you should on. I'll agree that. I'll agree that it was a Trumpian plan. Then number two is kicking ass. Me. Yeah, I kick ass. And then number three is meat. Awesome.

More me. And then number four, critical thinking. Yeah. That should be number one, actually. It applies to a lot of problems. Right. And then genetic engineering. Dick, I'll give you that.

That's actually a good one. And I would say the genetic engineering is, you know, could be number five on the list. That's not bad. That's where it's at right now. Okay, I'll give you a pass on that. Then, income-based fines, more me. Bullshit. Yeah. Bullshit. Such a good. Communist. Fuck you, communist. Then, euthanasia. More me.

Yeah, the good kind of death. Kind of weird that that one's so high up, though. Well, people want other people to die. Yeah, but that problem kind of takes care of itself without that solution. I'm in support of euthanasia, but I don't know if it needs to be so high. It ends suffering, man. Then, soap. Yeah, that's a, that is, get out of here. So soap is not in the top ten.

Get out of it. Maddo you stinky fuck. Hey, what does my smelling have anything to do with soap? All right. Soap truther. We didn't start smelling bad until soap was invented. Yeah. You ever think about that?

Yeah, people, no one complained about smells before soap. Or soap. It's a big marketing campaign. Yeah, that it is. It's a conspiracy. You smell like, B.O. I smell like B.O. There's nothing we can do about it, bro.

Why are we going to come up? Now we got soap, now everyone complained. It's like herd immunity. If everyone smelled like bad, like a human, we wouldn't need soap. But as soon as someone starts using soap. So vote down soap, people. It's a big problem. All right.

And then refrigeration. Huge solution. Get out of here. Get out of here. Top 20. I'll give you top 20, not top 10. Way bigger than euthanasia. Would you rather have a refrigerator or someone killed?

Hey, where are you going to put that dead body? Huh? Yeah, exactly. Oh, shit. Okay, vote up refrigeration. Ben Malala, you sof'sai. Number 10, rounding out the top 10. That's bullshit.

Correct. She's a fucking hero, man. She's so fucking... She got like $50,000 for winning an award, and then she used that money to build schools in Pakistan. What a fucking hero. No one's doing this today. She's just so...

That's not very much money. Magnanimous. It's very much money in Pakistan shithead. It's a lot of money in Pakistan. Anyway, Dick. Speaking of solutions... The biggest solution from last one, month. What was it? Lenses.

Good. Yeah. Good. Lenses. But it was neck and neck with NASA. And then Cans and then Generosity. Generosity, you fucking shitheads. Generosity is why this show exists. What we're doing is charity. Well, no, this show exists the opposite of generosity. What I'm doing is charity. By giving you my time for any price.

Okay, Dickheads? All right. All right. I got a comment from Andrew Shulke. He says, as Dick kept calling Maddox a sanctimonious fuck for pleading a case for generosity and other virtues being a big solution he might as well have been Justin Long's character from idiocracy saying there's that fag talk again Yeah well I'm not allowed to say that anymore

So can't do that So you're saying that in lieu of uh... call me a fag huh? It's for mediocrisy people Watch the movie you've never seen it I would love to see the evolution of words you know, like that you can't use anymore. Because we do just replace like the most offensive terms with new most offensive terms that you sneak in for a while.

And it's like, uh, people are catching on to that one. Like everyone got in trouble for saying Richard Sherman was a thug. Right? Like people, do you remember that? Which one was Richard? Richard Sherman was a very boisterous. Coconut. Yeah, coconut. Coconut on the CL C-Hawks.

Sean, what was he? Was he a receiver or running back? No, no, no, no, he's defense. He's a, he's a cornerback. Okay. Richard Sherman is a cornerback for the Seattle Seahawks, who is a Stanford grad, by the way. And what's the, well, I mean.

What's the controversy? What's the controversy? He would get loud and yell about what an awesome player he was, and he's the best in the game. Sounds like me. I like that guy. Yeah, but a bunch of people went on Facebook and called him a thug. Because he's not crazy in the internet.

You're just using, that you're calling him the N-word, but you're using, you know, Yeah, I disagree with that, though. I disagree with what? If you listen to him talk, he's highly intelligent. He's very funny, too. He points out the hypocrisy that is the NFL time and time again. Yeah.

He's a really bright guy. It's funny the way Sean just said that is the NFL. I did a quick scan of that sentence two or three times, you know, a quick loop. See, I've infected everyone's brain. Now no one knows what's right and what's wrong. It's my paradise. Yeah, great, great, dick. I got a comment here from, uh,

Well, it's all written in some weird language. It's Bulgarian. So I actually put his name into Google Translate to find out how to pronounce it. And it turns out Google translated it correctly. I think it's Stefan Tupazov. Topazov. Yeah, Tappuzov. He's Stefan from Bulgaria.

He says, Dick did a splendid job at embodying the people who don't value science problem. Go vote it up while he fucks himself. Man, you were really on a tear last episode about NASA. But I got an email, too, from this guy. Well, I think he did a bad job of presenting. NASA, but I did not. What were their biggest inventions according to you?

They put a man on the moon, shithead. That's what I started with. Yeah. And then what are they done for us lately? A oven that's also a fridge. No, Dickhead. That's an invention. Yeah, I laughed at him.

That's a bullshit invention. And a remote control vacuum cleaner. It has its use. Power tools, shithead. They didn't invent power tools. Yes, they did because they first used them in space applications because they needed them to work without being able to plug it in.

It's a company. It's an organization. Oh, would you say it's a corporation? I would say all corporations, the legal entity is a solution, but not NASA specifically. Got another one, Garland Robert. He says, figures that Dick would shiddle over NASA because they're creating experimental technology that might help millions in the future, but isn't helping now instead of wasting all their money, buying cheap whiskey to impress hairy chicks at Burning Man, voter bless her minds. Cheap, first of all, wild turkey is not cheap.

It gets cheaper than wild turkey. It's not the most expensive, but it is not cheap. So I got an email from somebody who works in the aerospace industry. But before I get to that, I have this bit, Dick. It's a new bit. We've been doing. Here it is. Dick Masterson.

Instant amnesia. Okay. This is from last episode, Dick. I hate these gotcha bits. I know. I know you do. I don't think gotchas are funny. Okay, I know.

This is from last episode. Last episode. What, the one we just recorded? Yeah. No, no, no. Two weeks ago. From the last Solutions episode. Oh, okay. You say these things that make me feel like I'm losing my mind.

And then I turn to Sean and Sean's no help. I'm like, Sean, did you not just fucking witness what Dick said? Play the tape back. And then we never can because we're recording live and it drives me fucking nuts. And then I sit around like, I wake up at three in the morning stewing. I'm like, he fucking said it. I know he said it. I'm not losing my mind.

So I go back and listen to tape. And of course you fucking said it. Here it is. You are describing the symptoms of a stumping. Here it is, dickhead. That's incredibly offensive to blind people. You're saying they don't lead productive lives? No, it's the biggest disability on...

Oh, they don't leave productive lives at all, you're asking? Or they don't have joy from live? They don't get joy from life? What the fuck are you talking about? They just said they don't have joy from life. I didn't say they don't get joy from life. Okay. And then not even like 30 seconds earlier, this is exactly what you said.

Without glasses, these people would be completely useless. They couldn't enjoy life at all. They couldn't enjoy life at all. They couldn't enjoy life. likes it all. Dick Masterson, Instant Amnesia. Yeah, you remember what I was talking about?

You were saying that people, you know what, Dick, it's your way of rhetoric, where sometimes to make a point, you really exaggerated, to make it sound more impressive, I think, and I think that's what you were doing, and then you didn't really, you didn't really believe that.

I don't think you actually believe that. I think there's a lot of people who can't function with glasses. Sure, but not to the point of, Not to the point where they can't enjoy life. No, I think everyone in my family, like, so if you put their glasses, if you put someone's glasses on,

you're seeing what they see without the glasses. Right, right. If I put anyone else in my family's glasses on, I feel like I'm looking through a kaleidoscope. Yeah. So that means without their glasses, it's like their head is permanently underwater. Like, that's what they're seeing.

Yeah. Like, you can't function in the world with that kind of vision. Right, but you were making it, you didn't say that. You said that they get no joy from life. That's what you said. Yeah, I think if you're comparing those two things, like the ability to see 2020, have your vision corrected

from what is basically Vaseline smeared across your eyeballs versus like looking normally, which is what lenses. What are you saying? Words matter, man. If you say no joy in life, you can get a blowjob with your eyes shut. You don't need to see to get to enjoy a blowjob. You don't need to see to listen to music. What does you mean words?

matter. You said no joy in life. That's... Enjoyment. No enjoy. Out of life. Words matter. Okay. Well, okay, no enjoyment, no joy. What's the difference? Yeah, I think if somebody's got 220 vision, is that how you say it? If you've got really horrible vision? No, it's 2020, yeah.

No, listen, if somebody's got really horrible vision, like 220, how do they say it? Is it 2200? I don't know. Whatever. If they're maxing out the scales at being blind, I think the comparison between having perfect lens-fixed vision, and that is no enjoyment. I think life would be pretty shitty if you had horrible fucked-up eyes and lenses didn't exist. Well, I mean, I disagree, because you can listen to music, like I said, you can, I mean,

there's... So why are you sitting in a tower listening to music all day? Well, Beethoven went... No, that's a bad example. I'm trying to think of someone who... Oh, like, Ray Charles. Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder have great lives, or had great lives. Ray Charles died.

I mean, I don't know. I saw that movie. I don't know if I would call that a great life. But he had moments of joy. He enjoyed performing. There's a blind guy. I mean, you know, it's a nuanced argument. I don't think you really meant what you said, but you said it nonetheless.

And I'm not losing my mind. That's the important thing here. I know. I know. I knew you said you. I don't know. I think you need to have your eyes checked. Fucking shifty dick.

Okay, tricky dick. Here we go, guys. One more comment here. This is from Andrew Ross Adams. He sent this all the way from Australia. He says, hi, Maddox. This is a bit of a long email. He says, in the last bonus episode, you touched on the idea that science.

working in a commercial R&D environment might find their ability to innovate limited by the bottom line. You are quite apt in your supposition. A colleague of mine used to work at a world-leading innovator in Europe, which specialized in laser technology. They ultimately became disgruntled and left the company after a major project that they had been working on for years was shelved because management changed and the decision was made that said project was taking too long, even though it was acknowledged that the project was going to succeed. sidestepping the debate on the rectitude of the company's decision. The reason for this decision is plainly obvious. A company needs to make money. The project wasn't going fast enough, and the project got shut down.

All the acquired knowledge was, of course, the property of the company, so it was not shared, and as a result, all the work in that area was totally snuffed out. This is far less likely to happen with government-funded research, since the driving principles and motivations behind such research are not profit-oriented, and focused instead on pure scientific advance. So you can tell Dick that SpaceX receives billions of dollars in funding from NASA, and on top of that makes heavy use of technologies licensed to them by NASA, i.e., things invented by NASA.

Yeah. What? I'm sorry, we're stifling a yawn there, you fuck? Come on. Dude, that's exactly the point I was making. So if you have profit as a motive, you will not have these other things come up. And another example, excuse me, these technologies... I love how you stack them up like this.

Go ahead. What's the next one? What happens is when you have profit as a motive, you're always looking for something that could make the company money, but then you're going to miss out on these technologies that we discover just through the pursuit of scientific knowledge and advancement. Like, for example, the genome project, the human genome project originally was a government project.

And then companies found out that you could get these patents on the genome. And then they started racing against the government to decode the human genome so they could patent certain gene sequences. Well, if companies patent certain gene sequences, Dick, that's really detrimental to the human race because then other scientists who want to use those gene sequences to, I don't know, make life-saving drugs, can't because some shithead company

is sitting on the patent trying to make a buck off of it instead of letting some scientists look into that genome and work on it that's public domain. Anything government made is public domain. That's a really important distinction. Says the statist. I'm not a statist. You absolutely are.

You're saying that the government has to be in charge of research. No. You just said that companies, companies, because they're so concerned with profits, necessarily stifle their own researchers, which you have to think is not true. It's not always true, Dick. I'm not an absolutist.

I'm not saying that companies are always doing this or states are always doing that. I'm saying that sometimes I can see some value, some virtue in state-sponsored scientific research as opposed to corporate-sponsored research. Sure. Some. I just don't think NASA is a solution. That's all. I think space travel is a solution. Satellites are a solution. But here's what my definition of a solution is. Without this solution, how bad was the problem? So without the solution of NASA, you've got a number of other organizations that could have picked up to pieces. Yeah, but you're arguing could have. You're not arguing a did. But that's why I don't think it's the biggest solution. Then how, where are these, where are the private companies sending men to?

to the moon. Where are they? What do we need that for then? You don't know, Dick. What's the problem that it's solved? There was no flag on the moon? Well, we fixed that huge problem. Way to go. We put a bunch of footprints out in outer space. Bluh.

You dumb. You fucking you anti-intellectual Luddite. Why are you in front of me? Why aren't you in a cave somewhere? Scrolling and scribbling. Maybe you don't take everyone's money and build a cave for me. Like you're doing all your research with other people's money. Banging hairy chicks at Burning Man.

No, I just want to say this. If you go to the moon and you find out if you had gone there and you found out, oh man, the moon's made of gold and they brought back bushels of gold from the moon, then you would have been like, oh, okay, that was a worthy endeavor. But you wouldn't have known that had they not gone in the first place. So you got lucky. You were using the benefit of their work, their hard work to discredit their hard work. That's fucking bullshit. It's not a benefit. I wouldn't have said good...

You did a good thing. You went to the moon and you happened to find a shitload of methane deposits. It still's not a good thing to me. I guess it's not my favorite solution. I would rather have... I don't know. Better farming. I'd rather have more efficient transportation.

I'd rather have a Wi-Fi router that doesn't need to be reset every week than have been to the fucking moon. It doesn't get me hard. I don't know what to tell you. I think it's cool. I like rockets and everything, but it's just not that big of a solution to me. Well, Dick, we are still learning from the problems that we solved in tackling the monumental difficulty of landing on the moon. We are still learning from those problems that we solved,

and we are reaping the benefits of that research and technology and will for centuries to come. Well, I think the Air Force could have done it too. Or DARPA. Yeah, because they didn't get given the money to do it. So why is NASA the biggest fucking solution when any one of those other companies could have hired the same German scientists

to do the same fucking thing? Could have but didn't. Yeah, because they didn't get the money to do it. Because they weren't given a shitload of money by the government to do it. That's my whole point. They just arbitrarily picked an organization to give it to.

And now, wow, you guys are the heroes. You got a ton of money more than anybody else and you did X with it. Great. So that's why NASA specifically is not my biggest solution. that's all. Yeah, but if they had given it to the Air Force or DARPA,

would you have been happy with their work? What do you mean? I have no idea. Would there still state sponsored? Of course not. Of course not. All right. I'm just saying that's why NASA specifically not my biggest solution.

But you don't see any value in government. Okay. Okay, you just don't, you just don't like it. I just don't like what? My money going to things that I wouldn't have given it to voluntarily? No, that's the definition of what the worst thing that I can imagine. Taking my money, giving it to someone, I would not have otherwise given it to. That's a little thing I like to call theft.

The libertarianism. Yeah, that's where it becomes libertarian. Because where's, what next? Take it and give it to somebody who wants to go get humanities masters at Berkeley. Yeah, I wouldn't have done that. I'm not giving my money to any fucking millennials who want to go get educated more on something that's worthless. So how is it not theft? How is it not the same? I wouldn't have done it. Yeah, well, okay All right, Dick, I mean, this is a whole It's a whole thing, it's a whole thing, it's a whole thing

So what, you want to do a solution? You want to go first? I do want to do a solution? No, you should, you want to, do you have, do you want to go first? No, I don't really, I don't need to. Okay, I got one. I got a real big solution, Dick. Okay, it better not be bullshit.

No, my solution is not bullshit, Dick, it is Bill Gates. Oh, it sounds, almost sounds like bullshit, but it does sound like bullshit, but it does It's sound like bullshit. It's Bill Gates. Dick, Bill Gates is the man. He's the guy who brought affordable personal computing to the masses. Basically, he built the personal computer industry. The entire personal computers didn't really exist before Bill Gates,

not in an affordable way. The philosophy of his company is to make device agnostic software. That is an important distinction that is lost on all these dipshits who use Apple products or even Unix products that are not open source. or excuse me, agnostic, hardware agnostic. Hardware agnostic or device agnostic means that you can create any device

and interface it with the operating system. You don't need to go through some hoops. You don't need to buy some specific license from them. You don't need to, it works with different devices. You need to make the driver. Of course. You need to work on it, yeah. But you need to do that for Unix too. It's just harder because no one's working on it.

Well, yeah, that's true. It opens doors to a lot of manufacturers to create products for your operating system, not just a handful like an Apple or highly customized mainframe architectures. That's the problem with mainframe architectures and really specialized Unix systems is that they close it off to a lot of manufacturers.

And so, you know, people say Apple products work better, but they only... Work more better. Yeah, get it straight. Yeah, that's how they say it. They say they work more better. But the reason people say that is because Apple has very limited numbers,

of devices that work on their system. Well, yeah. It's a positive to us. Well, if you limit, no, but it's a positive to you, but it's shitty for the economy and it's shitty for manufacturers, it's shitty for jobs, it's shitty for employment, it reduces competition. It's a shitty fucking system. Windows

came along and changed all of that. Yeah. Apple, and by the way, Dick, Apple wouldn't exist without Bill Gates. In 1997, Apple was about to close its doors, but Bill Gates saved the company with $150 million investment. They kept the lights on at Apple.

Steve Jobs was grateful for it. And that's when Steve Jobs changed his philosophy from one that says, we need to stop thinking that Microsoft needs to lose in order for Apple to win. And that's when Steve Jobs changed his philosophy and changed it so that he was no longer necessarily competing with Microsoft.

Steve Jobs started to look into different areas that Microsoft wasn't doing. Like Microsoft had won the, the... What years is this are you talking about? 1997. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Microsoft had won the OS Wars. Microsoft had won the browser wars. Microsoft was king shit. In fact, I'm not going to say that this was an entirely altruistic move by Bill Gates

because Microsoft was under fire for antitrust monopolies. Yeah, I remember that. Yeah. And so part of the reason that Microsoft may have done this is to artificially show that, you know,

we still have some competition in the market. So I'm not going to say purely altruism, but Microsoft did bail out Steve Jobs when they needed it. What's important is that he believed in Apple. He knew it would be a good product and a good company. And Bill Gates, your

solution and his infinite wisdom saw to bolster them financially. Yeah. To ensure their success. Then Steve Jobs and Apple focused on the iPod. The iPod is really what saved Apple. The iPod was the most successful

product, and man, I really like to shit on Apple. And for years, I had always boycotted iPods and I thought I don't fucking need that shit I used Sansa I used anything Zun was terrible

Such a piece of shit Zune was terrible Zune was a disaster Zune is like Microsoft's Last Ditch effort to kind of compete with iPod total failure But I used all these different products Then one day

I was dating this girl And I was in her car And she was playing a bunch of songs On her iPod mini Or was it Nanopod? I don't know fucking anyway the iPod mini she said hey can you change a song for me I'm like yeah sure I picked it up

started cycling through the songs really intuitive that thing's cool really intuitive I went to the home menu everything just like worked seamlessly it's fun the user experience I'm sorry what'd you say seamlessly everything just worked seamlessly yeah on this one product okay yeah there's still there's still huge forums

of problems that people have with their max shithead and myself included I'm working on a Mac right now on this game show it's driving me nuts Oh, man. Anyway, this product, Dick, I used it, and I said, you know what? I hate Apple. I've been shitting on them for years. And, God, I really wanted to hate this product, but it's a good product.

I got a hand, I got to give credit what credit is do is a good product. But anyway, man, we're getting off base here. We're going back to Bill Gates here. So Bill Gates made all his money, right? And what does he do with all his money? He's the world's richest man. He's giving it away. He's giving it away.

His charities have saved countless lives with an estimated 41.3, billion dollars. Yeah. Billion dollars that he has given to charity. And his goal, part of his foundation's goal, was to eradicate polio from the world. We are about 99% for the first time in history. Thanks in part to the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation,

we are 99% free of polio. What does Steve Jobs do with all his money? He died. Yeah, he died. He buried it up his... Gosh. Yeah, buried it right up as a rough... Rough badge for him, I guess.

Steve Jobs is famously not charitable. Steve Jobs fired one of the founding people of Apple because he didn't want to give him any more money. Who was? No, there was another guy. It was in one of his many fucking movies. You mean the first one out of the three? No, they had another investor,

but that investor wanted the money back. The guy who'd be worth like $50 billion. It was Steve Jobs, Wozniak, and one other dude, and the other dude put in like five grand, but he wanted his money back. Steve didn't. No, no, no, no, no. This was, when they were trying to,

when Apple was first getting its IPO, the CFO of Apple, not Steve Jobs, the CFO, I think, was talking to Steve Jobs, and he said, okay, what percent share do you want to give to this guy? What percent share do you want to get of laws? And so on and so forth. And it came to one of the founding fathers,

the founders of Apple, he said, what percentage do you want to give him? He said nothing. No. Said, fuck him. I mean, that's... Gave him nothing. I don't think that's comparable

to curing Paul. Like someone's business decisions are very different than their generosity in a global scale. I'm drawing contrast. Well, we don't know. First of all, Steve Jobs, if he was charitable, we don't know. He's never, we've never, we've never seen any kind of charitable. In fact, people have looked at the tax filings of Apple and the tax filings of Steve Jobs, and they've never seen any huge charitable contributions ever.

So I'm just drawing contrast of these two CEOs because they're in the same industry. they're very comparable. They get compared a lot. And I think that, you know, not to detract from Steve Jobs' strength, which is marketing and Bill Gates' strength, which is, I'm not, I don't know, man. Bill Gates actually. Bill Gates' strengths? Well, he started out as a programmer.

He used to program, he basically wrote the basic programming language. Oh, basic? DOS is based on another operating system called CPM. Yeah. Microsoft was, both Apple and Microsoft stole a lot of technology from Xerox. They copied a lot of stuff blatantly, which, by the way, back to NASA, Xerox got a lot of their designs and their inspiration from technologies that NASA developed. That's a fact. So it all comes back to NASA.

Anyway, this is from the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation. Current number of foundation employees, so they have 1,300. 182 employees just in their charity foundations. The total foundation trust endowments, $41.3 billion. Total grant payment since inception is $34.5 billion. In 2014, direct grantee support $3.9 billion. 2013, $3.6 billion. A labor-intensive and coordinated campaign led by the Indian government, Rotary,

the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation and the Global Polio Initiative deployed 2 million staff to vaccinate 170 million children throughout the country in India on two dates to help finally wipe out the disease. They eradicated polio in India. Yeah. Yeah. Well, when anybody shits on rich people,

I always wonder if they even know any of this stuff about Bill Gates. Like, every... I feel like there is a general consensus or at least like a tacit one about rich people being greedy and how like the super wealthy are all just bad guys. like grubbing money and taking advantage. And it's like, well, this guy cured polio. Like, sorry you get to work on the weekend

at your life of bagging groceries, at your job that will one day be replaced by a robot. But this man, like, this man, this super wealthy man made the entire world a better place with all his money. What the fuck have you done? You know what I mean? Yeah, but Dick, I think these are the exceptions and not the rules. No, because Warren Buff, him and him and.

And Warren Buffett go on tours. That's two. How many more you got? Well, those are the richest. No, out of the list of the top ten. Bill Gates and Warren Buffett, they're among the richest men in the world? Yeah, they are. Yeah, definitely in America.

But in the top 500 billionaires in the world, it's a paltry few who are doing this kind of charity. None of them are giving a charity. I didn't say none, but it's a minority. I think they may not be publicized as much too. May not be publicized as much because these people are out in the public eye. we use their products every day. They're a lot more visible than a lot of other people. What are you talking about?

Bill Gates specifically? No, yeah, or Warren Buffett. I mean, you always read quotes by them. You see them on TV, that kind of stuff. So, you know, there may be other people who are giving to charity in large amounts, probably not up to the level of-Millanda Gates. They're probably giving to the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation, to be honest, because they already have the infrastructure to handle all that money.

That's a huge problem. Yeah, but the Bill and Millinda Gates Foundation didn't exist until, what, like, 6, 7-7, years ago. It wasn't a huge, maybe 10 at most, but for the amount of charity that happens, then you have the CEOs of WorldCom who bankrupt hundreds of thousands of people, take lots of equity away. You have the, what's that shithead from, oh my gosh, what's the stock market guy, the hedge fund guy who, Bernie, Bernie Madoff.

Oh, yeah. Well, he's a, no, he's a flat con artist. He made off a shit ton of money. Yeah. He's a, he bilked the New York Mets out of millions and millions of dollars. He's a straight criminal though. Don't confuse him with like a businessman. Right, but look at the amount of money that Bernie Madoff has stolen

and it's comparable to some of these charities, Dick. If you want to say dollar for dollar, rich people are altruistic, I would be suspect of that. Oh, I would, I will 100% say that then. I bet the rich give an overwhelming percent of I bet the rich rival the Catholic Church

when it comes to Philanthropy, which is it? It's philanthropy. Philanthropy is what you're saying. I don't think so. I bet they give a huge amount. I don't think so. Starting with Bill Gates.

Aren't those write-offs too? Yeah, a lot of them do that's right-off. Yeah. Do you understand what a write-off is? It doesn't mean you're getting free money. A write-off means you're just giving away the amount that you would have made anyway. Like you just get to write that, you just get to not pay tax on that amount. So you're still giving away a shitload.

but it's still, it's, it's, it's to avoid taxes. Like, it's almost like a bitter... It is. It's like, it's almost like a bitter. It's not how a write-off works. No, but it's almost like a bitter last pill. It's like, well, if I have to pay these taxes, then I'm at least going to give it to a foundation that I like. Your understanding of right-offs is 100% wrong.

Then go on and explain it. You get to not pay the tax on that amount. So if I gave away 10 grand, I don't have to pay tax on that 10 grand if I gave it to a charity. Yeah. And there's a limit. Right. So I don't have to pay.

in that tax, tax bracket, like $4,000. Right. So I'm still losing $6,000. It's not a bitter pill. It's not a last-ditch effort. I'm just saying, in addition to the $4,000

that I would have had to give to the government, I'm going to give an additional $6,000 and just give it all to charity. It's still giving away. You're still giving that money away. Okay. You're not making any. You're not, right?

You're not like... Or you're paying less taxes. No, you're paying more. You're doubling the amount you would have had to pay. except you're giving it to someone else. Yeah, I don't know. What else with Bill Gates?

All right. These are the goals of his foundation. In 2030, polio and guinea worm, these are things that are trying to eradicate. Polio and guinea worm, completely eradicated from Earth for the first time. Other possible candidates for eradication. So Bill Gates wrote this letter.

This is from Business Insider.com. Bill Gates wrote this letter saying that he was going to focus on four ills that are hurting people in humanity and they're going to try to eradicate them. Other possible candidates include Elephantitis, river blindness, and blinding trachoma, which are just horrible, horrible things.

But back to polio for a second. Dick, this is from the World Health Organization, says, while polio is a distant memory in most of the world, the disease still gets in some places and mainly affects children under the age of five. One and 200 infections leads to irreversible paralysis, usually in the legs. Among those paralyzed, 5 to 10% die

when their breathing muscles become immobilized. He eradicated polio in India, man. You think paralysis is a big problem? Well, Bill Gates is helping solve that problem. And we're 99% of the way to eradicating it globally. In 1988, when the global polio eradication initiative was formed, polio paralyzed more than 350,000 people per year. Since that time, polio case numbers have decreased by more than 99%,

with only 416 polio cases. reported in 2013, due in large part to the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation. Bill Gates, man, think of whatever you think of his operating systems and whatever you think of his products, which, by the way, I use Windows. I'm not a huge fan of it. I hate Windows and I hate OS10. I hate them for different reasons, but I use the operating system. My philosophy towards operating systems is to use whatever it takes to get my job done

as quickly as possible. And there is nothing that gets my job done quicker than the Windows operating system. That's not to say that it's not a flawed operating system. That's not to say that I like it. But whatever you think of his operating system, Bill Gates, very powerful man, very rich man, very magnanimous, generosity, vote up generosity, vote up Bill Gates. I don't understand why Windows got all the hate that it did back in the 90s.

Because it was a monopoly and it was awful. When they created Internet Explorer as an extension of the operating system where you couldn't uninstall it, where you had to use Internet Explorer, they were completely monopolist. You didn't have to. You could use Netscape. No, but you had to use, you couldn't get rid of Internet Explorer.

Microsoft intentionally crippled the operating system if you tried to uninstall Internet Explorer because they said they integrated it into the operating system Explorer. So that Internet Explorer was inseparable from the Explorer that you checked your drives from. It was awful, awful. That still sounds insane to me. Yeah. Like them trying to innovate on their own piece of software and you. You can't excise out a part of it for no reason.

And then they're somehow culpable for that. They were trying to make an experience. They were trying to make a unified experience. You were the biggest cynic I know, and why aren't you cynical of their motives, dick? This was purely a cash grab. They were just trying to, it was a monopolistic move. I don't know.

I just don't see it like that. It was. Because Windows 95 didn't have it integrated into the operating system. And then on Windows 98 and Windows ME, that's when they started integrating it and that's when people really started to bring down the banhammer they're like, dude, you guys have the complete market. It just seems like it's the same reason

like Google's all over Chrome. Like, yeah, like I can't do Yahoo stuff with Chrome. It doesn't let me... But that's Chrome hardware. No one's impugning Apple for having Apple hardware. No, Chrome the browser. What about it?

That it integrates heavily with Google. The search engine? Yeah. Well, yeah. It's a search engine. Well, yeah. But it's not also your operating system. not also your web browser.

Microsoft was near the point. They had this website I used to link to way back when I first started my website in 1997. It was the Microsoft Monopoly Clock, and it was always hovering around 1155 at midnight. And it was because there was a point where Microsoft, I think during

the court case, one of the prosecutors just turned to the court, and they said, ladies and gentlemen, who here uses Microsoft products on their computers? And everyone in courtroom, raised their hand, and he turned to the judge and says, uh, your honor, that's a monopoly. Yeah, that's like, that's the kind of stupid reason that I just don't understand why it works on everybody. Like, it's a great product. Nothing else works. What are you going to use?

No, it wasn't a great product. It was, it was, it was, no, man. Windows, so here's what happened with Windows. I hate that you're making me shit on my own problem here, my own solution. Well, I used it just as long as you did, and I never had that big of a problem with it. Like, it crashed all the time, but. No. I used Windows 95. Buddy for like 10 or 11 years. Windows 95? Because I installed it the day it came out.

Like you couldn't have used it longer. I did. How long did you use Windows 95? The day it came out. But when did you stop using it? Oh, shit. I have no idea. Yeah.

I stopped using Windows 95 way, way longer than its expiration date. I stopped using Windows 95, I think like five different versions of Windows afterwards. And it got to the point where Windows 95, for me it was rock solid. It never crashed for me. computer had uptimes of three months and uh you know i never turn off my computers so for me windows 95 became uh i kept using it to the point of obsolescence where even viruses wouldn't run on it because viruses were written for newer operating systems so i would like occasionally download something that was bad and it wouldn't run and i looked into it was like why is this crashing and i looked

and it was a virus i'm like oh it's it's incompatible with my operating system right so i had security through obscurity at that point uh excuse me security through obsolescence but um windows 9000 95, Dick, was, was, wait, what were we just talking about? You were telling me why Windows is bad and why Bill Gates is not a solution. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I hated, I hate that I'm like,

I'm shitting on my own problem here. But when Windows 95 was the primary operating system that everybody was using, and still, most people are still using Windows operating systems, but when Windows 95 was number one, Microsoft developed Internet Explorer version 6, and they stopped developing any more on Internet Explorer version 6 because they said, that's it, this application is done.

They literally, like, they closed shop for the developers who were working on Internet Explorer. Sure. And they said, that's it. So that's why it's bad, dick, because when you have a monopoly, you've already squashed the competition. The competition can't compete with you. You're too rich, you're too powerful.

You have too loud of a megaphone. No one can hear your message, and people aren't, you know, your grandma who buys a new computer from Best Buy, isn't going to go through the trouble of installing Netscape or Firefox or whatever. Yeah, but I did. Yeah, but you're a more advanced user. You were in college. I'm talking about most people, Dick.

But when I installed it, I said, this isn't that much better. In fact, it's kind of worse, so I'm not going to use it. Like, otherwise, I would get, I installed Chrome and I got everyone to use that. That's what I'm saying. It's like, well, is it an enforced monopoly, or did people just not make very good competitive product? No, there were definitely better products at that time. time that people just didn't know about because Microsoft took away their need to even use another product. Whatever you, whatever case you want to make? No, no, but not because no better product

existed. That better product exists. It's there. It's just nobody knows about it because you already have a monopoly. Like right now, if you want to take a faster train across the country, you can't because there's already a train that exists and it's using all the railways and you can't make a better train. It's using all the resources. Like cable companies. Cable companies have all the infrastructure built already. No one's going to be able to compete with them because they had these

lines put in place that pre-exist. They have a monopoly. Well, but what makes it monopoly is that they engage in kickbacks locally to prevent competitors from coming in. That's a big difference. That's part of it and that's not exclusively what makes a monopoly. All right, you got more for Bill Gates?

There's a solution. Bill Gates... Holy fuck. Yeah, no, that's about all I got. All right, here's my solution. Lifting. Lifting. Lifting. What do you know about lifting, Dick? Oh, please.

Do you lift, bro? I have been lifting. I've been lifting my whole life. Sean, do you lift? You look like you lift. I do. Do you even lift? Not like I used to, though.

Not like used. That's the best answer. I have trouble getting up the motivation. You have trouble getting up? Well, you should. No, that's fine. It's the motivation to go lift. Look.

Sometimes. You know the joke. Do you even lift? Bro. You know that joke. Is it a joke? It's not a joke. Because all the problems you have in your life

can be made better with this one thing. That's why they ask. What's your problem? Is it with women? Are you doing this? Are you doing this? Are you going here? Wait a minute.

Wait a minute. Let's get down to brass taxi here. Do you even lift? What's your problem in life? What's your problem with your job? Let's go all the way back. Do you even lift? My car won't start.

Do you lift? All right, Dick Let's start there. All right, Dick. My family's estranged for me because they're assholes. First of all, lifting will cure that need to be validated by your family.

It has only huge benefits, and I'll go through some of them. Living longer. How about that one? Okay. Most forms of regular exercise can add years to your life, but strength training in particular

has big benefits. As we get older, the more muscle we have, the less likely we are to die prematurely. I'll give you that. Where's that from? What's your source? UCLA.

Sean and I both both are like, oh my gosh, it's a real source. We're looking at each other. We're like, yeah, that checks out. Good source. Yeah, because I found an article that lists all these reasons and had all these good sources from. No, I found a shitload of articles on what lift. Like I brought this in as kind of a joke, but when I started doing research,

there's like exercise. Yeah, exercise is good for you. But it's specifically lifting. That's better than like, Like little girl bicycle riding. That's true that burns more fat. Well, yeah, but that's only if your goal is to burn more fat. Like cardiovascular exercise is really good for you.

It's good for your heart, which is the number one killer of people's heart disease. Cardiovascular, I would argue, is more beneficial to people than just lifting. In fact, lifting can make you stocky and if you just build too much, if you eat too much protein and all you do is lift, you get no stamina. You know anyone like that, Dick? Everything that you said is false. It has Hugh, let me see this, recommends the American Heart Association, in fact, recommends adults aim for at least two strength training sessions per week.

What do you think about that? I think I would agree. That's pretty good. Makes you smarter? Lifting makes you smarter. I don't know, Dick. Lifting makes you smart. Do you lift?

Do you lift? Of course I lift. What do you mean, of course you lift? I lift. Don't lie to me. I'm not lying, Dick. All right. You know I lift.

Obviously, I don't. Bodybuilding forum. uh, just go there, read the forums. You want to talk about smarter? I don't know about that, buddy. Compared to what? Compared to the general populace. Like, you go to any other normal forum that's, that's, uh, not, not specific to, I don't know, just, just your average Facebook person who's an idiot. Uh-huh. Still smarter than some of those meatheads. Oh, see, prejudice. Very prejudice against lifting. Yeah. I don't think you do lift for that reason. I do. Uh, what? Dick, a lot of smart people lift, but they're not smart because of lifting. They're

smart in spite of lifting. That's not what this Harvard Medical School study says. Oh yeah? What do they say? Well, but the message boards are not indicative of the populace. No, but those are people who lift the most, Sean. They are the aficionados. They're the people who love it.

Yeah, that's probably true. But it's just like radio callers are not indicative of the listening audience. Okay, that's fair. Yeah. A study presented at the, let's see, Canadian Cardiovascular Congress, found that people who exercised better in terms of mental acuity the ability to acquire and process knowledge than those who did not exercise.

Okay. The study involved overweight, sedentary adults. This is what happened. They underwent a series of assessments. Does it, do the specifics matter? It makes you smarter. Yes, I'm going to read the specifics. For four months, they exercised twice a week.

Yeah. The exercise sessions involved both cardio and weight training. At the end of the four months, the participants had... They lost weight. However, the benefit... They were tested on their mental... acuity. That's not a very good argument for your...

That's not very good evidence to support your K-stick because aerobic exercise has been shown by countless studies to increase your mental acuity. I'm so glad you said that because you're wrong. In addition, although both cardio and resistance training increase the level of growth factors, there are studies

that show that more neurogenesis or brain growth occurs when you add strength training to your workout instead of just doing cardio. So if you're running, you're not getting smart, Everybody at the gym and on bodybuilding.com and lifting those weights, man, lifting, they're getting smart. They're also working out their mind muscles. Do you know what is an argument, Dick?

Okay, what you just said, listen to what you just said. If you add strength training in addition to cardio, it increases, of course it's going to increase because it's more exercise. Any exercise is good for you. Obviously not in excess, but if you're already doing aerobic exercise, that's good. Anybody has to worry about that. Oh, well, I actually... Right. Yeah, well...

Yeah. Yeah. Well, you're working out too much. You gotta stop going to the gym. Boy, not... You look way too good. Not the heifer who was munching on Funnions of my last bus ride from Vegas. Well, I just love that.

I love that comment because everybody says like, oh, I want to work out, but I don't want to get too big. Oh, it's just chicks who say that, man. No, that's true. And it's like, no, you don't have the... No, you don't have the testosterone that's going to build that much. That doesn't happen without some kind of outside help. There's this great meme on the internet, Sean. I saw it floating around on Facebook.

It showed the concern that women have with working out, with lifting specifically, any kind of strength training, it shows this really ripped female bodybuilder. And they say this is what women are afraid of happening by doing lifting because they don't want that male physique because it's very muscular, it's very masculine. Then it showed this is what actually happens. and it showed a picture of a woman who's perfectly tone

who doesn't have a lot of muscle, but she's also neither, she doesn't, she's not skinny fat. You know what I'm talking, you know what I'm talking about, Dick, skinny fat women. Skinny fat, like doughy with celluline. No, no, no, no, no. These are girls who are skinny, but not tone. So their arms are kind of just like. Yeah, they have horrible celluline.

It's disgusting. Yeah, it feels like you're grabbing bags of fat on bone. Bags of sand. Right off of the bone. Yeah, it's, it's, um, their skin feels very mealy, and you can kind of like roll it around. on their bone. And that's what skinny fat is.

And these people who have that can alleviate it just by doing a little bit of strength training. Trust me, guys, you have to work out really hard to get any kind of muscle growth or a definition. And I do, after my last breakup dick, around that time, I made a promise to myself

that I was going to work out every day. And I did for about 11 months. Every single day I worked out. And you could tell there was a huge difference in my physique. You could tell. I could Fuck, fuck you

Makes you younger This one It doesn't make you younger It does make you younger Might make you look younger No it These people are saying It makes your DNA

It makes your gene expressions younger Like it Because you know your DNA Like gets shredded in ages Let me read it Aging prize One on Do do do do do

A 2007 A team of American Canadian researchers Compared 600 aging-related genes of older adults to younger ones, as expected the older genes didn't perform well, then the older participants were asked to follow

resistance training routines twice a week for six months. So that's strength training. At the end of six months, researchers repeated the gene analysis, and they saw a significant improvement in gene expression among the older participants. To summarize their findings, increasing your strength by lifting weights

will make your genes younger. That is the same as rolling back time. Huh. Interesting. Yeah. Didn't know that. Pretty good, makes you younger. If only the gyms could make such a good sales pitch. Yeah, right. Man, people gotta fucking lift, Sean.

That's all I'm saying. Reduced depression symptoms? I agree, but that's all exercise, Dick. You're kind of glomming on to a lot of benefits of general exercise and saying it's due to lifting. What specifically can we attribute to lifting and lifting alone? You look fucking awesome. How about that one? I don't know, man. You know what, Dick?

You gave me shit about... I said... Testosterone increases incredibly when you lift. That's true. That is the fountain of youth. Testosterone? Hmm. Well, it's not good for your hair.

No. Who needs hair when you got fucking 24-inch pythons, Shams? What are you talking about? Gross. What were you going to say? Yeah, Dick, I gave you shit because I suspected that you skipped leg day, which I still believe.

I never skip arm day. Put it like that. Oh, I know that. I know that. But here's the thing, man. Lifting, like, guys, this is a problem with guys who lift is they tend to only focus on their arms. And they all look like big meatheads.

They just look like a little big meatheads. There's a meme on the internet guys who skip leg day. It's like Mighty Mouse. Yeah. They look like Mighty Mouse. They look like Mighty Mouse. Or what's his name of the blonde-haired dude? Johnny Bravo.

Johnny Bravo. They look like Johnny Bravo. It's ridiculous. But it makes you look awesome to a point because at some point you can see these guys in the bars, too, they look like big meatheads and they're all chest and no legs. They just look like they're top heavy and they're about to tip over, like an upside-down bowling pin. Yeah. So what?

Stop before you get there? No, have a balance. Have a balance in your routine. Can I tell, I want to say, I want to suggest this. People who don't have gym access or they claim they're too busy or they claim that they can't afford it. Guys, it doesn't take much to do any. kind of resistance training because just start out doing pushups. Do, do, try to start out, try to do 10 pushups a week, then 10 pushups a day, then move it up, try to start to do 50 pushups a session,

100 pushups a session. You'll notice a huge difference in your physique, in your tone, in your stamina, in your health, and you will think better and clear. And you'll, you'll, you'll sleep better too. No, no, go to the gym, get, do, get on an Olympic routine immediately, start doing deadlifts. Don't worry about form. Doesn't matter. You'll throw your back out a couple times, but you'll learn. It's totally okay. You can pop that spine right back in place.

Oh, what are you, a chiropractor? Yeah. Do you think chiropractor's real, by the way? No. No, they're all bogus. That's what I thought. Here's when I tested it at one time. I was at a vitamin shop,

buying some supplements or whatever. And there was this guy there who had a chiropractor stand, and he said, we can check your spine for alignment. And I went there. I didn't have any problems with my back, thankfully. I felt fine. No, no back pain whatsoever. But my girlfriend at the time did,

and I thought, well, I'll go through this routine and see what it's like just so I can give the suggestion to her. So she can come, right? So I stand up on this thing. It's like this big goofy thing, and they're trying to align your spinal other bullshit, and they're like,

oh, your spine's really out of alignment. They're like, you must be suffering terrible back pain. I said, no, actually, I was just doing this for my girlfriend. And then, of course, I told my girlfriend, do not go to a chiropractor. I don't trust those guys. Relief stress? You're always quoting stress

is such a big problem, right? I don't think I have, but it is a problem, yeah. You're always mentioning it on why the inconvenient problems are a big deal. It's because of stress. I don't think I've ever said that. Yeah, you definitely have. Your body produces more endorphins in a faster period of time when you're weightlifting than when you're doing your dumb-ass cardio.

There's so much vitriol for cardio, which makes people look good and makes them healthy. What's your problem with it? No, it doesn't. Cardio is bullshit. You're bullshit. You're bullshit. Yeah, you're bullshit, buddy.

I can run up these stairs two times and you're out of breath. Why do you have this idea that I have no endurance? Because I've seen it. When we go... What do you want to do? You want a box? Burpees. You want to do, you want an actual endurance test?

Do burpees. First of all, do you remember when you challenge me to the one-armed push-up? Yeah, I'll do burpees all day with you, buddy. Oh, yeah? I bet you couldn't. I bet you couldn't do 20 burpees in under one minute. I guarantee you can't. I work out six.

Six days a week. That doesn't mean shit. You can't do 20 burpees in under one minute. I don't think so. 20 burpees in under one minute. And under one minute. Uh-huh. How many is that?

One every three seconds? 20 burpees and under one minute. Let me count it out. One. Doesn't seem like a lot. By the way, guys, let me explain what a burpee is. If you don't know what we're talking about, a burpee is an exercise where you jump up with your hands up in the air, then drop down, do a push up. You kick your legs out, do a push up, then jump back up and jump up in the air.

Okay. So back to your original position. A burpee, so it seems deceptively simple. And everyone always thinks, oh man, I can knock those out, no problem. No, they can knock out 20 of them, no problem. They're hard you throw up. After around five, you are completely exhausted. I've been exercising doing burpees for a while now, Dick, and I have trouble doing 20 in under a minute.

It's really tough. And I feel like I know I have better stamina than you because I do a lot. of cardio. Okay. I can 100% do more burpees than you in a minute. In a minute? Yeah. What do you want to put on it? And I can definitely do 20. Maybe, you may be able to do more than me in a minute. Definitely 20 then. 20 and under a minute? Yeah, and more than you. That's the most important part though. More, more, what do you want to put on this? But more than me, you have to like set a time limit. In under a minute, yeah, 20 burpees. That's the bet. You want to do this right after this recording? No, no, no, no, no. I want to do it in the next

season. No, because you're going to exercise. You're going to portray yourself. Exercise all the time. But then you should be able to do it now. Uh, no, because I just got back from Burning Man. It's like, I took a couple weeks off there. Oh, guess what, buddy? So, I guarantee, look, 20 and under a minute. I know you can't, because you don't have the stamina. You don't.

The stamina to last one minute? 20 burpees in them one minute, you can't. You know, there's no way. What do you want to bet on it? I smell a bro-off. Yeah, what do you want to bet on it? It is bro-off. What do you want to put on this?

25 bucks. $25, please. Yeah. $20, $1 per burpee. Something, $25 is nothing. Something embarrassing, at least. You know what, Dick? Here's the bed, okay?

for every burpee that you do you owe me $20. I have to blow a guy. For every burpee that you do, you deduct a dollar from what you owe me. No, the money means nothing, no. It's got to be better than money. Then Dick, you come up with it. You're always challenging me to come up with a bet. And everything I throw out there, you're like, no, I won't get a tattoo,

no, I won't shave my head, no, I won't do it. Then you tell me, what do you want to bet? Hmm. I don't know. I'll think about that. That's why I want to think about it. I want to do it right after this. No, but regardless, do the challenge, and then you can think about what we owe each other. Yeah, but that's not the same then. This is a weasly way of getting out of it.

Burpees are tough, man. I don't think you can do 20. This is trying to make the show better. This is trying to sell season two. It's not trying to get out of his stupid burpee bet for $25. Look, whatever the win is, we can do it later, but I don't want you to train, because as soon as you train, of course you can do it.

If you focus on burpees, you'll be able to do it. I'm not going to focus on shit. Yeah. All right. Well, that's my solution, Louis. Lifting, bro. Insomnia, bone health. It's better for strokes.

You've got a shitload of testosterone. Oh, it makes you more selfish. You want to hear something interesting. Yeah. Upper body strength was linked to politics. So across the board, you can't predict where people are going to be politically. Whether they're wealthy, if they're going to be liberal or conservative, Republican Democrat, if they're broke, whether they're going to be Republican Democrat, right?

You think, well, you're wealthy. You're probably more Republican because it serves you. If you're broke, you're probably more Democrat because it serves you. But still, it can't be predicted. Not with 100% accuracy, but you can get in the ballpark, yeah. Like 60% right? Okay, well, everyone disagrees with that statement. That's not true.

You're just like 60% right. It has been, you can link it to upper body strength. Measuring, like, biceps and upper body strength. The more upper body strength, the more likely you are to vote for Donald Trump The four self-serving principles

No, if you're broke and you're and you lift You vote Democrat Huh If you're wealthy And you lift You vote Republican

Like it makes you more Self-serving I don't know man It's great I would love Good effect of lifting I would love to Believe that

But it's also one of those goofy things Where it's like causation Does not Correlations is not causation In this case specifically Because it also sounds like One of those goofy things Like oh

the mask that sells the most on Halloween of the presidential candidate is usually determining of the president. It's like, yeah, okay, maybe, but there's no evidence. Oh, there you go. That's an interesting correlation. That's an interesting correlation. I wonder if you looked more into those stats

if you found that people who Lyft also happened to do something else. Like, for example, there's a study that came out a while back that said vitamin supplements don't have any effect on people. And that was the headline. That was the big headline. Everyone's like, oh, don't take vitamins. They don't do anything. But I looked into it, and the study was they looked at people,

who take vitamins and looked at their rates of cancer and rates of heart disease and rates of things that kill people generally. And they said, well, they don't have lower rates of heart disease and cancer, et cetera, et cetera. And it's not where we're taking vitamins. Yeah. And they also neglected to take into consideration

to control for the variable that people who do take vitamins are generally already living healthy lifestyles. So they didn't control, like, a group that smokes that takes vitamins versus a group that doesn't smoke and takes vitamins, et cetera, et cetera. Like, it's hard to control for you. shit like that. That sounds kind of goofy.

Anyway, man. Rectal dysfunction also. Helps with that. Yeah, lifting helps with a rectal. Strength training has been shown to reduce almost all the major risk factors for erectile dysfunction. Unless you take steroids. A bunch of juice heads. What's the testosterone again?

Yeah. Yeah. I got another solution, Dick. This is a little bit longer, but I got another solution. How's this for a solution? 3D printing. Yeah. Ha! Ha! There's a solution. Look at those sonics. Yeah.

They look so great. Yeah, they look. What a big solution. They look great. You know what? I can sell those. I can sell those in a toy shop right now. Make a million dollars.

Can you give them away in your game show? No. No, they're too valuable. The producers can't insure anything that high. They tried. All right, man. 3D printing, dude. 3D printing when it first came out was called additive manufacturing.

Other names for it is Ravis. Rapid manufacturing, rapid prototyping. Now, that right there, that name, rapid prototyping, should tell you everything you need to know about the benefits of this technology. You know I hate 3D printing, right? I mean, you know I think it's hype, right? Dick, you hate the best shit. You hate NASA, you hate science, you hate technology, you hate advancement,

you hate things that are good for mankind. Why do you hate fucking, why? It's just a bunch of hype. Like, what are you printing sonic? No, it's not. It's not a bunch of hype. You get a print you a wrench? Oh, I'm so fucking mad already.

This is a record. I'm so mad. Dick, it's not a bunch of hype. Here, look, I can print this action figure. Fuck you, listen to these stats, okay? These are things you can print. These are things you can print with 3D printers. Oh, this is going to be great. Good.

You can print a boggagged shove your fucking mouth. Wasn't a prosthetic leg just printed? Yes, Sean? Yes, everything. You can print weights of any size, any weight you want. Can you print a CNC machine so I could actually make something used for? C&C machine. What a fucking nerd. C&C machines are from the 90s shithead.

We've moved on to 3D printers, buddy. That's the Rolls Royce of technology. Of manufacturing technology. You want a C&C machine? Wait, which one's the Rolls Royce? 3D printers. You can print way more complex designs. You can manufacture way more complex objects with 3D printers

than you can make with a C&C machine. Is that true? Yes. Like what? You can make, like, for example, a rhomboid. You can create any kind of like complex, geometric, geometric figure. Here's something. My car's fucked up.

I need another rhomboid. Dumb shit. Listen. You can create... Your rhomboid's busted. Oh, boy. You guys, if you manufacture, okay, here's some... Here's a...

There are complex objects that you can create in a 3-D application that you cannot manufacture in real life due to limitations of design and materials. For example, if you wanted to create, the most rigid structures in the world are ones that have lattices built in them. Like honeycombs and cardboard. If you look at the ridges of a cardboard, it goes zigzag back and forth, and it's just basically like scrunched up paper, but essentially they're making little trusses.

And those trusses are geometrically strong. They're powerful. But you could make an improved truss if you created a little, it's almost like a hexagonal shape that has interlocking hexagons inside of it. That's tremendously difficult. It's trivial to create in a mathematical application, but it's tremendously difficult to manufacture and engineer something like that. You can't do that with a CNC machine. because the tips can't go inside the machine to create little holes where it needs to.

The only way you can do that is through 3D printing manufacturing. So you're making what? Better cardboard? You're making better everything, buddy. Listen to this. Here are the applications. Construction, industrial design, automotive engineering, aerospace, military weapons, military vehicle, military armor, dental industry, heart valves, bone replacements,

biotech, human tissue replacement. You can 3D prints human tissue. Fashion, footwear, jewelry, Highware, education, geographic information systems, food, et cetera. You can make everything. Food? Yes.

Where are you 3D printing food? They're starting to create 3D printed food. They're making, actually, they even have 3D printed makeup. It's a replicator, buddy. Yeah, it's a magical 3D printer that doesn't exist yet. No, no, no. They're starting to already work on 3D printers that create food because there's a stuff called Soiland, right?

This Soilent stuff that they're starting to make. It's basically a paste that makes any kind of, it's nutritionally balanced. everything you need in food. And you can feed this through a 3D printer and then add different flavorants or whatever you want. Basically, we're moving towards the Star Trek replicators where you can make any food you want with a 3D printer. Listen to this, man.

This is from Mashable. A Chinese company harnessed 3D printing technology to build 10 one-story houses in a day. It's cheaper, faster, and safer alternative to more traditional construction. And I looked at how they built this? Yeah, what do they print? What do they print?

What do they print? The houses? What comes out of the... Yeah, what's the house? building concrete walls. It's a giant 3D printer. A 3D printer's building. Yep.

That's not a, that's a 3D printer, a mechanized concrete pouring machine. Yeah. And the way that it doesn't dick, normally, look, look, if you wanted to build a house without a 3D printer. You'd have to hire a lot of Mexicans. Well, say you wanted to build a house the traditional way. Right. You pour concrete into, basically, you put up two slats, like two pieces of a plywood so that you

could hold the shape of the concrete. You put eye beams in it to give it a little bit more structure. And then there you go. There's your house. There's your concrete wall. And that takes a lot of time. It takes a lot of labor. The way this does it, it creates those ridges, just like in cardboard, inside the concrete

walls. So basically, it's creating a wall that is way more fortified and stronger than anything that a human can build in the same amount of time. It is absolutely phenomenal technology. So where's the, what is a 3D printer then? Like what, because that sounds like a house building machine. A 3D printer, I mean, it is. That's the beauty of 3D printers.

You can make it as big as you want. Yeah, I guess. I always thought it was those stupid plastic things where it's building one layer of plastic at a time. If we're talking about anything that you can build that comes out of it. Yeah, anything, Dick. It doesn't seem like it should be called a printer.

No, it doesn't seem like it should be called a 3D printer. Well, what it is is it's taking a design that's a 3D design and then just adding line by line by line. And by the way, Dick, when you're welding, the strongest welds are the ones that build little lattices like that. I don't know if you know much about welding. My dad was a welder. See, he's still welds. His welding certification, I forget what it is, but it's basically Navy-grade.

And Navy-grade welders are the best in the world, man. They make welds that are stronger. Like, if you had a car, a plane wreck, whatever, and you had these welds that might, the type of welds that my dad makes, those are the only things that stay rigid and they survive any kind of wrecks usually. They're the strongest points and the way they work is by creating little lattices inside the weld.

They melt the metal into certain shapes that create lattices, and lattices are really strong structures in nature. 3D printers, by nature, by the way that they print things, create lattices that are exactly like those of strong welds.

So it's creating products that are incredibly strong and durable. What else you got besides the house? What's another example of something that I don't think a 3D printer is? So the Sonic the Hedgehog that they sent that our fans sent last episode or a couple episodes ago,

that one is made using a traditional 3D printer which is just doing lines of some plastic or something, right, in certain granularity. So you can see little ridges on it. This is like first generation 3D stuff. This new company is working on this 3D printer that can create objects in under an hour of any complexity with holes inside them, any number of holes, any number of...

Like, basically down to almost... You hooked me with holes. Almost down to the atomic level, almost. Where they can throw... It's really interesting technology. It's basically like a sonar that shoots waves into a fluid, and this object comes down into this plastic mesh or whatever the material is that you're printing.

and just pulls out this incredibly complex object as complex as you want, no manufacturing limitations, and the weakness of traditional manufacturing is you have two parts of a cast, right? So you want to make... It's almost like an egg, like an Easter egg. If you wanted to create an egg-shaped thing in manufacturing

and you wanted something inside of it, you have to have a seam because you have to make two parts, fill it with a cast, glue those together somehow, and then put the object inside. then glue them together somehow. With 3D printers, you don't need to have that seam. It's way more structurally secure. I still don't know what I'm going to make with it.

Guns. You can make guns with 3D printers. You can make... Whoa. You can make headphones. You are right. You can make phones. You can make any object you use, buy or need, you can make in a 3D printer. You can't make guns, though. Yeah. And by the way, Dick, I'm working on a huge video about the gun debate. Yeah. And this is one of my central arguments. The gun debate is over. It doesn't matter what you think about guns. It doesn't matter if you think your country is all high and mighty. If you think that you guys are above us in the United States, we have a big gun problem here. But if you think you're above us because your country doesn't have guns, guess what? Guns are coming. Guns are going to be in Norway. Guns are going to be in China. Guns are

going to be in Japan. Guns are coming everywhere. So we need to solve that problem, not by banning guns because it doesn't matter anymore. That argument is irrelevant. 3D printers. They're also good. guns do i mean we talked about that we had to have a whole episode about guns there's guns there's a complex issue where there's good and there's bad but regardless of what you think about guns the argument is now irrelevant because we now live in an age of 3d printers well i know i've heard that argument a lot i've read it and i when i first thought i totally agreed with it like what argument the argument that 3d printers is just a gun machine like how can you have any laws on guns when you've got a printer that can print out guns.

Sure. Right? But then I was thinking about it, and we already have that. Like, you can build guns that are illegal, right? Like, I got that AR-15 I was talking about buying with my life coach. It has, because we're in California, it has this stupid bullet guard around the magazine release. Right, right? So that you have to, you can't release the magazine with your finger.

Sure. You have to get a bullet that something's thin enough to stick in there, or like your dick or something, and stick it in there. Your dick. You're right, right, right. You have to stick it in there to release the magazine. Right. It's illegal.

I don't know if it's a, I don't think it's a felony, but it is illegal for me. I think it might be. It's illegal to cut that guard off. Right, right, right. So I can just press it. Yeah. It's illegal for me to put a magnet on the button inside so that it sticks out so I can just press it. Like, it's illegal to subvert.

that in any way. So what I'm asking is, we can already have illegal... Like, it's already illegal to have these things that are readily available. I don't think the 3D printer is going to change the gun debate for that reason. You know, I wish

it would. Dick, I get to ask you a question. So you brought in lenses as your solution last episode. Right. Did that include rhetorical or metaphorical lenses? Like, the ones you need for your metaphorical myopia that you're suffering from? Because here's what you're not seeing, Dick.

I'm agreeing with you. I don't know. I mean, go ahead. What the difference here, the difference I think that you're glossing over is that 3D printing is democratizing manufacturing. We are no longer talking about people buying parts on eBay and modifying their guns and making guns and their kits at home that takes weeks. We're talking having a fully functional gun or product or shoe or whatever it is in under an hour. And here's the other thing, Dick. You think that made in China is a big problem, right?

We talked about this in the last couple episodes ago. 3D printing is going to start the end of manufacturing in China. China's a big superpower. They're starting to become a superpower now because they monopolize manufacturing. They make it cheaper than anyone else. But if you put 3D printers in people's houses and they become as common as regular printers and you're able to just print out any little trinket or device that you need, guess what's going to happen to China's industry?

Guess what's going to happen to China's industry? manufacturing industry. The rubber dog shit factories will close. Yeah. Yeah, that's true. I'll be printing those all day. This from Bloomberg. Of course, not everyone is sold. This is an article.

This is what 3D printing could mean for the world's manufacturing industry. Excuse me, for the world's factory of China. Of course, not everyone is sold on the big promise of 3D printers, which builds objects by laying down thin layers of molten plastic, one on top of the next. In June, South China Morning Post

reported that billionaire Terry Gou called the printing technology a gimmick. This is a guy, a huge manufacturer in China. No, he's saying that because he sees the writing on the walls. You might expect that from the founder

of the world's largest contract manufacturer of electronics, the Foxcon Technology Group, Han High Precision Industry, which has huge factories in China. The company didn't respond to a request for comment. So China sees the riding on the walls here. Not just China, but this is any manufacturing that we do anywhere.

It's going to democratize manufacturing, Dick. It seems like a stretch. It seems like it'll always be cheaper to just make a bunch of shit in the same place. You're not qualifying that with anything. Why do you think that? Instead of printing it out of thin air? Why do you think it'll be cheaper?

Are you kidding me, Dick? You're not paying any... You're not paying anymore for overhead and inventory and shipping costs. All you need is the raw materials. How is that going to be any cheaper? Like, you cannot possibly make it cheaper. In fact, they have a 3D printer

that 3D prints makeup. And this is a huge... huge, huge thing in the makeup industry in the cosmetic world, because this girl, this woman designed this makeup printing device, and it takes the same exact raw materials that all the industry uses. Doesn't matter if it's Clareol or Revlon or any makeup manufacturer, any cosmetics manufacturer. They're all using the same stuff to give you the same makeup because it's really hard to get FDA approval for your own unique thing, right? And it's very costly. So they said that the only reason, the only thing that makeup manufacturers have are

colors. They said that they have monopoly on colors, they have a patent on colors, they trademark certain colors, right? With her 3D printer, you can take any color, literally by taking a photo of it, and then just clicking on it in the software, and it will print out

makeup, usable makeup, in that exact same color that you print, that you take a photo, took a photograph of and it's usable in under 10, 15 minutes. That sounds cool. How can you compete with that? How can anyone compete with that. It is democratized manufacturing.

Well, one, is it going to be tough to get some of the materials? Yeah, you have to have all of these materials. And number two, tell me something. If you're going to have to have neodymium on hand. Neodymium, and no, you don't, that's for magnets. But you can just buy magnets. Let's go back to guns for a second. Doesn't that steel have to be

tempered and all that kind of stuff? Like, how's that going to work out of a printer? Obviously, obviously, the 3D printing technology is not 100% there yet, but we are rapidly approaching that. And I'm thinking within the next two years, we're going to have that technology to be able to provide any raw materials. So the same exact raw materials that these manufacturers are buying in China,

guess what, they're going to start selling on Amazon. You're going to be able to buy a pouch of copper, a pouch of cobalt, a pouch of phosphorus, or whatever materials you need, or a blend for whatever, they may create a new polymer that is super powerful plastics that are as powerful as steel or metal, or you wouldn't even need it because you can create microstructures inside these. these objects that make it as strong as steel. Hmm. How far in the future are you talking about now?

I'm thinking two or three years, Tops. I think that's ambitious. Maybe. My guess is two or three years. We're going to see some, we're going to see a shift in manufacturing. We're going to start seeing 3D printers. Right now, 3D printers, you can already buy them.

Go to Best Buy. You can buy a 3D printer for like 900 bucks. But you can only print Sonic the Hedgehog heads. Like, honestly, what can you print with one you buy right now? That's today, Dick. But what can you compute with a computer you bought in the 90s? Not much. But look at computers today and look at computers tomorrow.

Like, look ahead, man. This is incredible technology. Yeah, no, it seems kind of interesting. Yeah. Like, I've seen Star Trek. I know what a replicator can do. It just seems so expensive to have a box that prints cell phones. Three little words for Dick.

You know what? Synthahol. It's going to make alcohol? Yeah, they call it synthahol, don't they? Yeah? In what? In Star Trek. Oh, I didn't know that.

Yeah, it doesn't have the kick of real alcohol, but it's free, I think. No, they banned alcohol in their society. Star Trek doesn't have alcohol at all. No, they have synthahol. But it's not alcoholic. I don't know if it's not alcoholic. I think you can get fucked up with it. No, I think some asshole came back from the future or for the past.

He got frozen in time, and he was like this real bombastic capitalist kind of guy. He didn't understand what their motive operation was in the future. And he was talking about alcohol. I think. I'm not sure. I don't know. I'm so sorry I mentioned Synthol. Yeah, me too. This took such a horrible turn.

I like replicators. I just don't have a lot of faith in the 3D printing movement. Well, I don't know why you don't dig because, like, all technology, it's only going to get better. It's not going to get worse, except for fucking cell phones with touchscreens. I fucking hate those. But anyway, even touch screens have gotten better since their first inception. Look, man, every new technology has two hurdles. First, it costs a lot.

Second, it's limited in what you can do with it. But every new technology that's global in scale like 3D printing or computing or anything that we use every day that we will find a use for gets better over time and cheaper over time. Just like music did with CD technology over tapes, et cetera, et cetera, it gets better and cheaper and more usable and more accessible to the masses. And we're not far from a future where everybody has access to 3D printers. I mean, right now you can go to Best Buy and buy a 3D printer. for under a grand for less than most computers.

Are you kidding me? This is the first generation of 3D printers for less than a grand. We're rapidly approaching a future where 3D printers are going to become accessible to the world. I still think there's probably some unforeseen roadblocks. Yeah, cost is never going to be cheaper to make a cell phone. But also those materials like phosphors,

you could potentially make a bomb with some of the pouches of shit you could order on the internet. So I mean, I think Homeland Security is going to have something to say about that. It's already, it's illegal to have we, and you can just throw seeds outside and have that. Having 3D printers, I really don't think... I wish it would solve the gun debate, but I don't think it's going to have a big effect on it.

Well, just because of that. That's fine, Dick, but you can't outlaw data. Like, you can't. Well, yeah, but... Look, they've been trying to tackle the issue of copyrighted movies. They can't even get us to stop downloading copyrighted movies. How are they going to stop us from downloading data? We can download the prints for a gun,

or you can download the prints for a phone, whatever you want. And by the way, Dick, it doesn't have to be all or nothing. We're not talking about printing a phone from scratch at home that's usable. You can buy a base component that still has the circuitry and stuff that you can't print at home. Like Google is developing this phone. I think it's the one, the Google One or something like that. It's a phone that is modular. So you can add any modules that you want to it, and you can 3D print those modules if you wanted to.

I saw that. Cool idea, but it's like, what the hell would I ever use this for? That's why I feel about 3D printing. That's what Apple uses say. Like, oh, what would I use it for until it comes out? And everyone's using it, and you're like, oh, I get it. What, Apple 3D printer? No, any new technology.

With iPhones, like you point out something that iPhones don't have, like the task killer, like I pointed out a couple episodes ago. And we got on this huge Twitter debate with this moron. Not we. I don't get in Twitter debates with people. Yeah. Anyway, man, it's something that is exciting. It's on the horizon. And I think that it's going to change the world in ways we don't even foresee.

I hope so, because the world sucks Well, I hope it changes for the better Alright, my last solution To round out the season Yeah Actually, now that I say that out loud I wish I'd brought in a slap dick solution But this, because this one's actually a good one

Okay. Flight. Flight? Oh. Flight, flight, flight. Dick, I think for the first time in a solution's episode I'm gonna give you one of these. Yes. You earned it, buddy. Thank God. Yeah. Oh, fuck, we should have brought in porn savers.

Oh, shit. You want to just do porn savers? We can throw that on as a bonus. As a bonus to this. Yeah, as a bonus solution to this. Okay. So do you flight first and then we'll do porn savers? I don't even, do I really need to prove flight?

Imagine spending three months sailing a ship across the Atlantic Ocean with a bunch of dudes who are probably all assholes. Like this is the 1800s, remember, to do what? So you can go work at a farm in a place that's pretty much the same as the place you just left? It's really disrespectful to slavery. I was talking about indentured servitude, Sean, but if you want to imagine it that way, that's fine. I know what you were talking about. Today, you can fly across the Atlantic in a matter of hours to spend time with a bunch of assholes that are just like the place you just left.

Right? Come on. Change the course of human history. The start of space exploration and space flight because of the airplane, because of flight in general. What was the first airplane? The Wright brothers you mean? No, it wasn't the Wright brothers. Who made the first airplane? Well, that was my answer.

What was the correct answer? Actually, the Wright brothers, too. So a lot of people credit... I was the first successful flight. That was the first airplane. There was a number of gliders before that, but that was the first airplane. No, it wasn't.

That was a glider, though, wasn't it? No, it took off. It took off. The Kitty Hawk took off? So I looked into this, actually. I looked into the Wright brothers, their claim to fame, because it's actually really controversial.

A lot of different countries disagree that it was the Wright brothers. First of all, it was... Oh, who? But I forget which countries. But specifically, the Wright brothers. So around the time the Wright brothers were working on their plane, there were lots of planes, actually, lots of planes that people flew.

The only problem is they couldn't really steer them. They could fly in straight lines. So Wright Brothers specifically created the first plane with this design where the wings would kind of bend, and that was just enough to get them to turn in the air. Oh. Yeah. And then they were able to make planes that could turn in the air, but only in one direction. So they had all these, like, goofy planes that would just turn left.

A Zoolander. Yeah, they were just flying circles or they would fly in straight lines. But the Wright brothers were the first to create a plane that was steerable in the air. And that was a huge innovation. That's actually what they're accredited with. But that's controversial. There's a lot of people who disagree with that. Huh.

Yeah. Well, I'll tell you who the first guy is who fucked it up. It was King Blued. An English king, Bladood. He sounds like your man. Bladu. He's a cool guy. I'm sure he'd have been fun to hang out with.

But he was killed. He also practiced, in addition to being a king of England, apparently, he practiced necromancy and communication with the spirits of the dead. Legend said he used necromancy to build a pair of wings attached to his arms, and he made an attempt to fly at the temple of Apollo while wearing the wings. That's funny. But he fell to his death. That's the funniest thing ever.

Is that the guy who fell off the, what's it, the Eiffel Tower? No, this is in 800 BC. Oh, long time. I remember the guy you're talking about, though. There's nothing like a failure of flight, right? That's tragic, man. They filmed that. That was like one of the earliest recordings, like first recordings in human history.

Yeah. This guy jumping off the Eiffel Tower because even back then, they nailed it. People in like the 30s, you know, the late 20s and early 30s, Like when they, the camera is really rare and difficult to use and difficult to come by, but they're like, oh, we got to record this. We got to film this shithead. Yeah. Yeah.

They all know it's not going to work, right? Like this is, we got to throw this on YouTube. Yeah, we got to throw this on YouTube in like 70 years or 100 years, whatever. Yeah. Real quick, I was thinking of the right glider. You're right. It's the predecessor to those powered flyers. Oh, what?

Is it different glider? Are you looking shit up now? Yeah. Sean, you motherfucker. I wanted to see. No, we're not, we're not going to call, uh, we're not going to call blackout I'm looking up facts. Facts help research and research helps evidence.

I just want to see for my own, you know, for my own sense of China invented the kite. How about that? I guess not everything that comes out of China's bad. Yeah, apparently. Last year, three billion people flew safely on 36 million flights,

and there was only 81 accidents. You believe that? All those flights? I remember a teacher of mine in, I think, fourth grade, said we were talking about a big plane that crashed. I think it was like Pan Am or something, way back in the day. And he said that the reason people talk about it so much,

like the Malaysian flight, what was it, 79 or whatever, the Malaysian flight that got lost. The reason people talk so much about missing flights is because it happened so rarely. Flying is pretty safe. That's interesting. It's really uncommon for a flight to have any problem. If you look at the sky map, like look at the radar,

there's a website that tracks. all the flights going on in the United States domestically in real time, and you can see at any given time there's thousands of planes in the sky. Every single day, every single hour, there's thousands of planes and very, very few of those have any problems. So that's why a plane

issues are big news. It's still the safest method of transportation, they say. It's safer than being at the airport. Wait, I brought in stats for this. I watched this documentary on air travel, and just like you said, the thousands of zigzagging planes in the sky every day. They said something like the odds of being...

11 million to 1. Well, check this out. They said, if you flew in a plane 24 hours a day, it would take something like 56 years before statistically your number was up. And 96% of people survive plane crashes. How many? 96% survive plane.

Because they're counting like, well, it is a plane crash if the landing gear fails. Like that dude in Hudson, Captain Sully Sullenberger, who landed it with the fucked up landing gear, that counts as everybody survived a plane crash. So, and that happens when that, like, sorry, go ahead. I was just going to say I have an interesting story on one of these famous plane crashes. So you remember seeing that video of the plane that had a problem with its landing gear

at landing in LAX. This was probably about 10, 12 years ago, something like that. This plane's landing gear was crooked. So instead of being parallel with the runway, it was perpendicular to it. Like a 90-degree angle. And so it was, they were watching it for some reason they caught this. plane coming down on camera at the right time because the pilot was in a holding pattern around the airport and they were trying to frantically figure out how to solve this problem because

these passengers are in the air they know their flight their landing gears fucked how are they going to land this thing and so they quickly came up with this plan uh to solve this problem they said well just try to land on your back wheels and then just kind of ease on the i saw this live yeah no i was watching this with a friend of mine whose dad was a pilot. Yeah. Yeah, it was awesome. You remember that video. Oh, yeah. We'll link to it on the website, but this video, this plane landed,

the pilot did this incredible job. He just barely touched down on the nose and just like eased onto it, and it like started burning the stem that the landing gear was on to the point where it was like oh, so close to like touching the cabin. Turns out my friend's wife, a good friend of mine,

his wife was on that flight. and they were like... So sometimes a good thing is a bad thing, you're saying. What do you tell? What? Oh, no, no, Dickhead. But they said that on the flight, they were all watching CNN,

so in real time, they were watching themselves land. It was crazy. Yeah. Getting high on oxygen. You know, Dick, I got to ask a question. This is kind of a philosophical question about flight. Oh, wait, let me get to the stats first.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Do you do it. Because I brought them in and I don't want to waste the stats. One in five thousand. 0.01 deaths per 100 million passenger miles in airplanes. Cars is one fatality per 100 million. So it's 100 times safer than cars. Yeah, and bikes are 100 times safer than that.

I don't have stats on that because no one cares about bicycles. What's your philosophical question? My philosophical question about flight. So when you said flight, I was thinking spaceflight, does spaceflight count? But I'm not even sure in space if that counts as flight. Because flight, when we think of flight traditionally, you think of an object flying through or passing through or permeating through our atmosphere. So we're talking about atmospheric flight. I think if you don't have like the Bernoulli effect in place, it's not flight.

Flight is like you need air pressure, you know, you need to have a wing. It needs to be, I agree with what you're saying. But what is air other than a less viscous medium than water? So then I started thinking, well, does it count in water? because the propeller of a boat works just like, you know, very similar to a propeller in the air in that it's pushing this medium behind it through the spiral, you know, the Bernoulli effect or what. It's not the Bernoulli. It's like something different, but it's pushing water.

So then I thought I started just thinking on a very philosophical level, what do we count as flight? Is it just atmospheric flight? Air. I don't think it counts in space. If you throw something in space, it's going to continue in that direction forever. Okay, here's the difference. Space, all you need is propulsion. That's your number one concern, right?

You need rockets, you need them more efficient, you need them bigger, that's what you need. Well, you don't need that. You could have propulsion in space through just physical, like, throwing. Still, you still, that's the mechanism you're concentrating on. Underwater, you're trying to stay underwater.

Like, the buoyancy is, if you're cruising around on the top of the water, you can go fast as fuck, right? You can have a speed boat that goes fast as hell. Submarine ain't gonna go that fast. right? You're working on a whole new set of problems. Your main concern is not the ability to stay underwater.

You know what I mean? In the air, the only thing you're worried about is staying up in the air. So it's different set of concerns. That's where I would draw the line. That's my philosophical difference. I don't know. But without flight, you wouldn't have any kind of space travel. It's not a coincidence the shuttle looks like a big plane.

Air-assisted launch is a big deal. You know? Yeah. It was a stepping zone. I'll give you that. There you go. So the first flight was Kites, China. You have China to think.

And rockets, actually, the first rockets are China too. Yeah. Oh. Shipping. Air transport carries 0.5% of the volume of the world's shipments. However, that cargo is 35% of the value of shipped goods. That's a lot of value. That's such an obfuscated way of saying that there's a value. I mean, man, you don't have to sell me on flight.

I think it's great. Wait, you don't think that's interesting? That, like, such a small amount of shipped goods are worth so much? I mean, 35% relative to what? Like, what's the rest? Ship with cargo? Okay. Ship with boats?

All right. How do you know? That's not interesting at all? That's not impressive at all. So, 0.5%. That's not even interesting? Uh, I mean, nah. You could have said 60%.

Would 60% be more interesting than 35? I don't know. It doesn't mean anything to me. I don't have any context. Well, imagine the goods that are being shipped around. Electronics. I don't know. I don't know.

I doubt it's electronics. I think you have, you've had, like, stronger arguments for flight. Okay. Yeah. I think that's a weird one. I thought it was interesting. That's so small amount of goods is worth so much. 0.5%, 35%.

Yeah, I guess. That's kind of interesting. Yeah, well, there you go. Yeah. Well, flight's a big solution, guys. 80% is the average occupancy of aircraft globally. 80% filled It's people.

So better than cars. Way better than cars. I wonder what that was before 9-11. I bet it was lower. Because there were way more flights available. Flying was more lucrative, was more profitable for airlines. And I remember I went to China one time

on a flight that was half full. And I had a whole row to myself. I slept great. It was awesome service, everything. Those days are gone, man. You are lucky. Every airline, there's such dickheads. oversell every fucking flight,

hoping that someone will show up late so they can resell their seats, and then they'll bump you to the next flight. Flying's awful now. Flying's awful. Yeah, flying's awful. Yeah, it is a pain in the ass. I hate it. I hate it. I think the TSA fucked us over quite a bit. And bailing airlines out fucked us over

10 times that amount. I mean, flying has gotten so bad now that I would rather take a bus back and forth from Vegas than fly, because flying means, oh, I got to plan I get a plan ahead for at least an hour to get to the airport, then another hour to get through security and check in, then another hour and a half in air, and by the time I land,

I've already spent about four hours, four hours of my day. I 100% agree with you. You could go to Burbank, and the flight is like 45 minutes to Vegas, and get on Southwest. It's an hour. That's true. It's about an hour. 50 minutes, I think. Yeah, Burbank's better, but it's way more expensive, Sean.

It's like twice as much as LAX. Charge it to the production. No problem, Sean I'll just do that No, I Here's a bill I agree with what you're saying though Like I used to fly a lot out of Van I's

Like I just fly the little planes The Sussnas And I would show up Sign a book Grab a key Go get in a plane And just take off And it would be like grabbing a car

It would be great If that's what flight was to everyone Dick I'm curious You just show up with a pilot And you're like all right let's go Like this is a bus Yeah. You could do it with Enterprise.

Like, it should work the same way. But I think we're, I think we invented something great that we're not using as well as we could be. Dick, I'm curious, do you know of any kind of service that you can just go to, I know, I know this exists. I just don't know how to do it. But just go to small airports and then just find a pilot who's flying to a place and then you just give them $100 and they just hop on with them? No, because little planes are really expensive to fly. Like the little ones that you'd be able to find. Like if you went over to Van Nuys and just cruised around, like,

looking for guys. Van Nuys is a city in, uh, in, uh, yeah, it's a, it's a big hub for like FedEx. Yeah. Um, you'd be able to find them, but they'd have to fly there and back and you're looking at a price tag like, like, the wet rates on a plane, even a little plane is the what rate? The wet rates, they include fuel. So you only get charged if you run a plane on how, on how long you drive it. Huh. How long you fly it. Oh, it's like 120 bucks for an hour. It sucks. You know what you could, uh, you could build with the 3D printer as a plane, Dick. Yeah, well, you're going to build fuel to pop them off. No, you buy the fuel. You're not making everything through 3D printing, but you're making a lot.

You can make a lot. I would bet you could make 80% of everything on a plane through 3D printers alone. 80%. That's pretty good. Yeah, it's just aluminum. Yeah? They're making a little... I know it's around the corner, man. We're going to have aluminum 3D printers, titanium,

all these all these alloys. I can't wait. All right. No, flight's a big solution, Dick. Good job. Good job, guys. Go vote up Bill Gates. And what's our final? Our final mutual... I hate when you bring in a person as a solution. Like the things that he invented, the personal computer, whatever, that's a solution. Change industry, yeah.

Yeah, but he's a guy. Eradicated polio. Guys do things, dick. But another guy would have done the thing. You keep saying this argument. It's such a hollow, shitty argument. Like, oh, someone else could have. Someone else would have.

But they didn't. Bill Gates was the guy who did. Yeah, but he's not a solution. He is a solution because he... He's a guy. But he came along and did. it. Like, regardless of your hypotheticals, I don't care about these hypothetical

people who don't exist who could have done these things. They didn't. Let's talk about what is, not what isn't. We talked about that a couple episodes ago. But he isn't the solution, Windows is. He didn't, he isn't the solution to polio, the vaccine is. Dick, Steve Jobs, right, was a, uh, people,

people lionize him as a great CEO. But there are things that, that are unique about Steve Jobs that I don't think that many other CEOs have those qualities. And same thing about Bill Gates. People don't have these qualities. Bill Gates was that guy who did. Look, there's lots of millionaires and lots of billionaires in the San Jose, in the Silicon Valley, in industry, but they're not doing the things that Bill Gates did.

Bill Gates is unique. All right. Yeah. There you go. That doesn't really address my point about the man being a solution, though. Why not? He did it. So is Orville and Wilbur right the solution for plane flights then?

Yeah. They did it. Okay. Go vote up Orville and Wilbur Wright then. It just seems like a weird way of looking at solutions. Well, in so, look,

only insofar as they are unique. If they were doing something that everyone else was doing and they just happened to be the first, right? That's not that impressive. But if there is something unique about the way they solve that problem or unique about the way they approach that solution, then they are the solution.

Because they have that, they have that ingenuity that most people don't possess. Well, it's your solution. If you want to vote up people, then good for them. So Dick, we got our first ever mutual shared solution. Porn savers? Or should we save it? Should we bring it? This is a long This is already two hours, man. Is it really? Yeah, let's bring it in a new season. Oh my gosh. Let's bring it into the new season. All right, ushering in the new season, guys. There you go. So we'll end it on that note. So for our final episode of the first season,

thanks again for subscribing. I have Bill Gates and 3D printing. I have lifting and flights. Awesome. Okay, great. A flight. Flight. Excuse me. Flight.

All right, guys, thanks again for supporting the show. We really appreciate it. Tune in next season. We got a lot of exciting stuff coming. Go to the gym, you fat fuck.