The Bill Simmons Podcast - All Hail Tompa Bay, Plus 2022 Best NFL Bets With Cousin Sal

Episode Date: February 8, 2021

The Ringer’s Bill Simmons is joined by Cousin Sal to discuss the Buccaneers' victory over the Chiefs in Super Bowl LV, Tom Brady’s seventh Super Bowl win, what went wrong for the Chiefs, review the prop bets, odds for next year’s Super Bowl champion, Parent Corner, and more. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Coming up, Tom Brady just won another Super Bowl, and I have no idea what year it is. Is it 2021? Is it 2015? Is it 2004? I have no idea. It's all next. It's the Bill Simmons Podcast presented by FanDuel. Football is in full action. FanDuel's highest rated sportsbook is the best place to bet it all. We've been doing pretty well on million-dollar picks this year. I love the first month of the season because you have to go into the season thinking, I think Pittsburgh's going to be good. I think the Chargers are going to be good. I think Seattle's going to be good. And then trying to back what you think in those first few weeks and then zag the other way. If you were wrong, you could bet on new and fun markets on FanDuel, like

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That's happening. The movie's on Netflix. If now the football's over, you want to catch up and watch that one. But that is coming on the Rewatchables Monday night. Coming up, the cuz and I are going to break down another Tom Brady Super Bowl title. I can't believe it. Here we go. Pearl Jam. All right. Cousin Sal is here.

We're taping this 8 o'clock PT Sunday night. Sal needed some time to calculate all the crazy prop bets that happened. For the fourth time since we've been doing this podcast together, Tom Brady has won a Super Bowl. We didn't do a podcast for the first three. They didn't, I think, have podcasts back then. But now it's 2021. He has won one third of the Superbowl.

So the 21st century, and we were pouring dirt on him a bunch of times over the past couple of years. And he's just never going to go away ever. Wow. Wow. Are you, I mean,

what the, what goes on like 31, nine? Like, I know we picked them on all these interviews and everything we did, but that was just like, I can't go against Tom Brady, but then it actually happens. And they didn't have a chance. Like at halftime, they didn't have a chance.

That last drive. I don't even know where you want to pick this game up. It's insane. We'll go to the game in a second. Let's talk about the Brady stuff first. So a couple of crazy things with that. He had never had an ass-kicking victory in the Super Bowl. That's true.

His seventh win, all six, the closest maybe was the Philly game where they were in control of that the whole time. But that still ended up being a three-point game. And they still had to make a play defensively in the last couple minutes. Granted, Philly was trapped there on 20. This is the first time start to finish his, his team dominated a game. And, you know, at halftime I had some chiefs fans in my life and I went on Twitter to see if people were complaining about the penalties.

Everybody was. And I'm thinking like, all right, there, there might've been a couple, couple borderline shaky calls, but the Chiefs were terrible. Their coaching was terrible. They didn't play well at all. Mahomes couldn't connect with anybody on third downs. It was like, I felt like that was the right score at halftime. The Bucs were killing them.

What do you think? Yeah, a couple things. If you want to bottom line this game, it was the Chiefs' offensive line was awful, right? And the Bucs' defense came at them, for sure. Not in a line was awful, right? And the Bucs defense came at him for sure. Not in a way we thought, right? If we went with the narrative, like this is the most decimated offensive line a Super Bowl team has ever brought into the big game, then it should have been just Mahomes running

for his life. And it was. So with that in mind, and you say this is the first Brady ass kicking, he's had a 520-yard game, right, passing. He's had a 466-yard game passing, I think. He has two of the three 400-yard games in the history of the Super Bowl. And it wasn't even a great Brady game, right? He did plenty enough for them to win, but 21 for 29, just a shade over 200 yards. So the ass kicking came with his best defensive performance maybe i know the

rant they held the rams to nothing in his last patriots win but for god's sakes it wasn't anything even with the offensive line being like it is you thought mahomes would pull off the magic and and a couple of these drives to land on nine points i don't even i really think they would have been better off with a healthy offensive line and ch Henney than Patrick Mahomes and these two. No, really? Well, I mean,

would they score nine points? They wouldn't have scored more than nine points. I just can't believe what I just saw. I did not understand people dismissing. Even I had Peter Schrager on Thursday, a million dollar picks and must've spent like 10 minutes going through the chief's offensive line. Like this guy,

their left tackle has been on eight teams. Right. Their right guard was on the waiver wire in late November. And, you know, the case for the chiefs. And I think why the line stayed at minus three was just like, it's my homes.

He's the best. He'll figure this out. And I think I even said this on the Thursday pod. Sometimes in football, we get into trouble by doing the, well, no, it's this guy. And it happens in basketball too, where you have all these obvious things that are

like red flag, red flag, red flag, red flag. And people just go, well, it's my homes. And that's kind of their case for taking the chiefs. There was really no other case. Tampa ran the ball down their throats. We knew that was going to happen because you could run the ball on Casey and Tampa had been running the ball really well in the playoffs. And then, you know, their defensive line, I,

I was glad boomer brought up bowls in the post game. The post game was pretty choppy, but, um, the fact that bowls didn't blitz the shit out of my homes and just trusted, you know, I have four good guys that can pressure him. I have two awesome linebackers, including David, who I have four good guys that can pressure him. I have two awesome

linebackers, including David, who I thought really did a nice job on Kelsey. And then I'm just going to use a bunch of D backs and I think I can get enough pressure. And that's what happened. And by the third quarter, he was running for his life. It felt like, yeah, I mean, he was a mess. He really looked like just a stumbling out of a bar, like three 30 in the morning at one point, like, you didn't know if he was calling a timeout or saying run the play fat. Like, you know, when he's doing that hand signal, like, oh my God, he's wobbly.

It wasn't even really hitting the head at all. And yeah, I mean, look, we're going to do some gloating because we had Tampa Bay, but no way we thought it was 31-9, right? But I guess, you know, when you have a magician and you take away his wand and his cape and the assistant that he's going to saw in half being the offensive line, there's nothing there. Like you said, they had a center that they benched and then they had to bring them back.

It was just a complete mess. And when you don't have a running game to kind of mix things up, this is the this is the product. Now, that said, Hill, maybe things are different if Hill catches that ball when they flooded the zone with Hill and Kelsey, when Mahomes like broke to the left and it was a little face guarding, but Hill could have caught it for a long touchdown. And to me, the backbreaker was that drive before the half. I mean, you could blame it on even my wife who doesn't care. It was like, my God, he's getting all the calls. This is ridiculous. I was like, ah, settle down. But the Evans thing, the feet getting tangled, that was weird. The pass interference that they had to call like almost immediately

because Brady threw on the interception, that was weird on the previous drive. Well, wait, let's go through that drive because that's probably where the Chiefs lost this game. I think so, too. Bucks get the ball back with a minute left. They run on first down and try to choose some clock. Chiefs lost this game. I think so, too. Bucks get the ball back with a minute left. They run on first down and try to choose some clock. Chiefs call timeout.

That was weird. Then third and two, heading into that one, they call timeout again. Third and two is weirder. All right, even if you guys get the ball back, you have no timeouts. You're going to have the ball on your own 25 seconds left. What do you think is going to happen? All you're doing is giving this team life. So then the bucks get it.

And then they get the long Mike Evans play. And I thought it was past interference. You saw that one clip, like first he tripped them and they weren't going to call it. But then the second one, he definitely with his hand hit his left foot. I thought Evans was going to score a touchdown. And here's the thing. He went, he fell down. It was because of the guy behind him,

I guess. But do you see where the ball landed? Do we see one uncatchable call? I call for, no, they don't call those anymore. Is that honest? I'm being honest.

Is that gone? Because I don't think I saw it all year. Did they take it out of the rule book? You basically have to throw the ball into the first row of the stance for the, my God. I mean, I do feel like he might've caught that post,

but the second one went through the goalposts and the second one went through the goal post and they called. Like, it was... Yeah, but I think they called. He bumped the guy as the QB. Like, it was like, you know, it was quick.

Yeah. I don't know. Look, that's not why the Chiefs lost. And I thought it was weird that their fans were going nuts about the calls. Like, you guys aren't

moving the ball at all offensively. And I really thought they lost the ball and lost the game in that first quarter because the Bucs had two bad drives start the game. Right. I have no idea why they weren't running. I was texting you and House and Hench like crazy. I'm like, what the fuck are they doing? Just reverse to Scotty Miller. Yeah. Dumb shit. Yeah.

They were doing like left, which is breaking out all his awesome, cool Super Bowl plays. It's like, just run the ball up the middle and do play action. This isn't hard. And then the Chiefs, you mentioned the Tyreek drop. They had another one where Hardman was wide open and Mahomes just kind of missed him. And it seemed like if he had just lofted it a certain way, that was a touchdown. Which brings me to one of my points.

I don't think Mahomes was healthy in this game. It came out today, he needs to have surgery on his turf toe after the year. His throws were sailing around in weird ways in this game. But the turf toe didn't help his running, right? His running is actually what kept him in the game for the first half. He had almost as many rushing yards as he had passing. Before that last drive, before Kansas City's last drive of the first half,

he was 3-for-12 for 23 yards. His completions were to Pringle, Kelsey, and Hill. It was like, oh, my god, that's really bad And then it started, and everything to Hill opened up in the middle for him But yeah, you can't do that at all At a 39.6 passer rating with three minutes left in the second quarter The Bucs, I felt this way going into the game I wasn't, you know, you almost want to see it But it did seem like

the type of team that had a chance to really match up with the chiefs where you had the super athletic, really gifted linebacker to put on Kelsey. You could get a push with the front four and you just have a lot of D backs that are just flying around. And that, and I thought that Bucks defense got better every week, you know, in the playoffs. In that Green Bay game, it was a deceiving 26 they gave up to the Packers because what did they lose? Two starting D-backs during that game, and it felt like they're kind of holding on for dear life at the end. I just thought it was a bad matchup for the Chiefs,

and on top of it, like their O-line, which wasn't great, you know, in the first three rounds, and then it just passed the point of no return. And I, I think like there's a couple of lessons from this game, please. One of which is the back to back thing, which I don't think we can sleep on. It hasn't happened since 2004. Right.

And you think like, we just kind of penciled in like the incentives, the same, you look at all the guys in the bucks, how many dudes, this was like the most important game they've ever played their entire life. And then you go in the chiefs. They just won last year with the, with pretty much the exact same team.

There's no way this was like a life or death, but you know, granted they're trying to win and it's a huge game, but they were definitely confident. They're the favorites. And the Bucs side is like, this is the most important three hours of my life. They're comparing it to Russell Wilson. Right. So he won that first Superbowl very handily against Denver. Right. And then against Brady, he's in there and he lost the second Superbowl. And now he's like, Russell's

great. Right. He's going to be top three or four MVP every year, probably, but goes to show you, it doesn't mean you have to get back every year. Right. And the way that makes me think like the way the Patriots did it, they had nine years in between Superbowl wins. Like my God, like the chief for them to keep Kelsey and Hill and all those guys for the first nine. Yeah. Like,

let's say it happens over 15 years that he wins six Superbowls. Now I don't even think it doesn't, it doesn't even matter. Now you have to get the seven. It's just, nobody's counting Brady. How about that? We're not going to live now to see a player

better than Brady. And you might be fine with that, but we're in our 50s now. I want to tackle this. Let's take a break. We're coming back talking about this. All right, let's come back.

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That's the feeling of fall. And it's only at Starbucks. All right. So you mentioned Romo made this point near the end of the game and I thought it was a great point. If Mahomes wins this, he's got two, Brady's got six. He's got his whole career ahead of him. We have no idea how long somebody

like Mahomes will be able to play. We never thought we'd have a 43-year-old QB win a Super Bowl and look confident and at times really, really good. So who knows? Mahomes might be able to play until he's 50. 7-1. Having to pass Brady down means 8. It seems so unrealistic.

And then I was looking, like we talked about this the last time, how Brady is now 34-11 in the playoffs. The next great QB, we mentioned this two weeks ago, has 16 playoff wins. He is 34. For Mahomes to have to put together the type of resume and career

Brady had. You would need a lot of luck from a health standpoint. Sure. And Brady, because he's a big dude who doesn't scramble a lot, who would, especially second half of his career, smartly gets rid of the ball,

um, stays in amazing shape. He's got, he's injecting avocado juice into his veins at this point. Mahomes would have to commit to some sort of crazy health side. And I feel like he would not

have to scramble as much. And he would have to pick his spots way more. But that's not who he is, right? He gets hurt more than... The guy's running around. Think about Brady at the beginning of his career.

Did he ever get this nicked up like Mahomes does Whether it's a toe or a head injury Or the knee from last year For the quarterback sneak He's not a lucky player In terms of injuries He's freaking fantastic

And the best physical specimen we've seen We had one bad one He had the torn ACL Eight minutes in the 2008 season That's really the only bad luck injury he had the, the ace, the torn ACL eight minutes in the two eights, 2008 season. That's really the only bad luck he had. Yeah. Brady at the hands of the chiefs. Right.

Yeah. Other than that, I can't even really remember like a really significant Brady injury. He had the durability he had, but I think he's six, five. He's not running around. He's not scrambling.

He, he was pretty careful about taking big hits. I think he had some concussions second half of his year, his career. He's a freak. He's not scrambling. He was pretty careful about taking big hits. I think he had some concussions second half of his year, his career at the Pats. He's a freak. He's a superhero freak. He's like a Marvel character at this point. Don't even, you can't even compare him to anyone. You want to go Mahomes against Joe Montana or Rogers against Joe Montana, but lump all those guys together. I hate to say it, but Brady, and you know, this is great. You're speaking fondly of him, but it's going to hit you. You're going to be very upset that Gronk scored the first touchdown.

You should have had that. That was 14 to one odds. You needed to do all the emotional hedging you could have this game. Congratulations. You won money on the bucks, but this is going to hit you. I don't know if it's going to be a three in the morning tomorrow, next week. Oh yes, it will. Now, you know what I did?

First of all, my million dollar picks, people will be telling their great grandkids about the success we had this year. Eight now in the big bets, when like almost 4 million bucks. One of the reasons was I rode breaking the box every week. I wasn't allowing myself not to root for it. I got to say, I was at peace with it a while ago. I was super happy. I was with my dad. My dad flew out for the game. He put on a hazmat suit, flew out to LA this weekend. Have you checked on him? He's crying. He's in your pantry crying right now.

No, we were, after the second TD, we were like high-fiving like it was a Pats game. We both love Gronk. I don't know about this. He's my favorite Patriot ever. I know you don't want to hear it.

I love Gronk. And to me, like a small piece of this game was the Gronk-Kelsey thing, right? And I know on the on the sports cards, nonsense podcast that we, we launched a couple weeks ago on Friday, there were,

he was, uh, Gio was saying, you know, buy your Gronk cards. Now he was like, Brady and Gronk are going to win. The Brady cards are now like Michael Jordan level,

but he's like, watch Gronk. Gronk's going to cement it as the greatest TD tight end of all time. And Kelsey was lurking on the other way, right? If the chiefs win and he gets the 10 for one 50 and two TDs, then it's like, Oh, it was Kelsey. The greatest Gronk. This was the last piece for him. Now. I, I already thought he was the best tight end ever,

but it's so funny. We come out of those games with those two guys that we'd already decided on. Now they've gone to another level somehow. You know, they're the same age. Am I wrong to say that? I think they're the same age, Kelsey and Gronk. Is that wrong? Is that possible?

No, Kelsey's only been in the league like eight years. I know, but let's look at this way. Oh yeah, Gronk, I guess came into college or out of college a little bit earlier. Kelsey's 31.

How old is Gronk? Oh yeah. Gronk, Gronk's I think like 30, Gronk is 31 also. No, he's 31 also. Wow.

Thick, right? Until May. Yeah. Yeah. He's the best. No, it was 31 also. Wow. I think. Right. No, until May. Yeah. Uh, yeah. Uh, he's the best. Gronk is the best. Brady is the best. And it's going to hurt you. You could say whatever. Your million dollar picks are fake. You're never going to be a millionaire. You'll be a millionaire, but the picks are fake. And, and I'm telling you, it's going to hit you. I want to, I want to be your first call. I want to hit you. It it's going to hit you. I want to be your first call when it hits you. It's not going to hit me.

He was never going to win another title with the Patriots with the team we had. And I think we probably blamed him a little too much last year for everything. The pretty disappointing season. And then you look at the talent they had this year. It's like, oh, my God. I thought start to finish one of the great decisions. I went from thinking this is the dumbest decision any major superstar has ever made since Jordan and the Wizards. Right.

Where it's like your legacy is at stake. You could have just been drafted by the same team you retired with, gone down as the best quarterback of all time and stayed the whole time like Joe DiMaggio and Mickey Mantle and Larry Bird, all these guys. And instead you're risking it. You're going to fucking Tampa to play for Bruce Arians and all of these dudes who've never won anything. Like this is, this is desperate. This is like an actress getting, you know, $200,000 worth of plastic surgery to try to look hot in some role when they're 58 years old. No, it was the opposite. It was a brilliant move.

And the irony is... He picked the perfect team. He moved them along at the right pace. It was brilliant. Well, I want to get into it because I think it is the perfect team. But could he have done it with other teams? Could he have done it with the Rams?

Or, you know, it wouldn't have been the Seahawks because they have... I think he could have done it with the Rams. I bet he could have done it with like five other teams. Well, there There was a rumor of Breeze retired last spring. Which I think was conceivable because ESPN

thought they had a chance to hire Breeze. That Brady was going to go to the Saints. I guess the question is, could he have done this with the Saints? I feel like he probably could have. Could he have done it with the Washington football team? Maybe.

No, now you're getting to this. Well, honestly, but we talk about it like, oh, here's the great irony of this. And it maybe just applies to this game, but everyone's talking about like, he went to, oh my God, when he goes to Tampa and gets those shiny toys, Mike Evans and Godwin,

and if Gronk comes over and, you know, Antonio Brown, like the team he didn't have, the offense he didn't have in New England. And it was the defense that stepped up. It was so crazy that it was the defense that won it for him to a point where, all right, great. He won MVP. By the way, cash is a two to one.

But what does a defensive player have to do holding the Chiefs to nine points to win MVP? Right. Like the Chiefs over under was, um, like 30 points and they held them to nine. The defense was great, but yeah, you're right. They had most of the toys there, but the three things that they didn't have that happened because he went there, Leonard Fournette, who looked like his career was over in Jacksonville, who got waived and I think passed through waivers. Anybody could have had him. They must feel stupid. A lot of teams must feel stupid, but Jacksonville especially.

He looked incredible the whole playoffs. So he gets between him and Jones, he gets 33 carries for 145 yards. That was the Bucks rushing offense. But then Antonio Brown, he finally gets to go there. And that was really why he fell apart with the Patriots. That was the last straw.

When they cut the cord with Brown, he was like, what the fuck? I don't have any of the receivers. Yeah, but they had to, right? They had to. But I think he's going to Guantanamo Bay at that point. What are they supposed to do? I think he took it personally. I think at that point he was gone. That's my sleepover, buddy.

Bring him back. Well, and then Gronk, who two years ago in that Rams Super Bowl, looked like he was the Bluesmobile trying to make that one less ride to downtown Chicago. Dated 40-year movie reference, everybody. Blues brother, yeah. But yeah, he just looked like he was done. And it was like, wow, that guy's had too many surgeries.

And this is over. How about this? He played all 21 games, right? Was it 20 games he played? What were the odds on that? It got better as the year went along. I think what Brady, what he was able to do with Tampa really reminded me of an NBA. Like when LeBron goes to a team and convinces like this buyout guy to sign and this guy,

like what do you have with the Cavs? And it's like, yeah, we'll grab Richard Jefferson. Then, then, uh, Oh,

Kyle Corver, come on over. And you kind of stack your team with the role players. You need four net who was only 16 for 89. I felt like he could have had 200 yards if they fed him in this game. Right. Breaking big ones for sure. Yeah.

That defense looked a little gas too early. It was the other thing for the chief little gassed too early was the other thing for the Chiefs. Well, here's the other thing. And by the way, the toys, the weapons, Evans had one catch for 31 yards. Godwin was two for nine. So I'm saying he only had 200 yards

himself, Brady. And it was the defense that won it. Devin White, eight tackles, an interception. Winfield, four tackles, an interception. Winfield, four tackles, an interception. You know, he had sacks all over the place. Sue had one and a half. Barrett had a sack. I don't know. I guess you get the

break. But you think about it. So you think about this team compared to the Pats. This team was not really this good for the last decade, right? And they're getting top ten picks. And you look at, you go through the roster and like Devin White, David, some of the D backs, they had a couple of free agent signings like JPP and Sue and people like that. Shaq Barrett, I think was a really smart signing, but the defense that they pieced together was a combo of the fact that they weren't good. And the fact that they had

a ton of cap space. Sure. Evans, I think was the seventh pick in the draft running back. They drafted Ronald Jones, but running back, it continues to be the most overrated position to address in the draft. It seems like every year you can find the four net type, but I, this team to me, I, I haven't seen like whether they have to cut cap, whatever, but I feel like they could run this back and this team would be pretty good. Whether they're the same incentives, I don't know. But I do think it's a really talented team, don't you?

Yeah, I do. But I felt the 49ers were talented too. So there's something, I don't know, is that just the losing team that has a hex on them? Maybe. Yeah, it's usually the loser. Yeah. Quickly on Gronk,

because I thought it was just awesome to watch him. And Schrager, who was a good luck charm for me on Million Dollar Picks, talked me out of Gronk in the Bucks to win, which was 5-1. Because I did feel like we'd hear from Gronk in this game. Gronk has a clutch tight end.

I think, you know, he was like we always compared him to Shaq on this podcast right it almost seemed like unfair in his peak but

I look back the 2014 Super Bowl when they beat the Ravens they came back 35-31 in the Seahawks he was 7 for 108 TD against the Ravens

6 for 68 against Seahawks the next year when they lost to the Broncos 2018 it's 4th and 10 they really have no receivers Brady I think was concussed for 68 against Seahawks. The next year, when they lost to the Broncos, 2018, it's fourth and 10.

They really have no receivers. Brady, I think, was concussed. And they just called a video game play of send Gronk down the middle and just heave it. And he fucking came down with it 40 yards down the field. And they missed a two-point conversion. Fourth down, touchdown,

catch back in the end zone. Right. He's good. Eagle Super Bowl is nine catches for 116 and two touchdowns. Chiefs game in 2019, he had that huge 25 yarder on the final drive to set up the tying score. And then he got the big third down catch in overtime.

And then in the Rams game, he made the biggest catch in that game, the 29 yarder. And in this game, I thought he probably had the two biggest catches of the game. Not to mention the one right down the middle, which was the old-school Gronk, but this guy,

there's never been a more clutch tight end. Not to mention a better tight end, but goddamn. You gave Brady stats. I think Brother Bri looked it up or something. 16-4 in the playoffs. I don't think there's a non-quarterback that's better than 16-4, right? Hensh said Charles Haley or something,. I don't think there's a non-quarterback that's better than 16-4, right? Hensh said Charles Haley or something,

but I don't even think... It's just all insane numbers. It's just a dumb... It's almost a time we shouldn't even count in history. Because no one will believe it. Speaking of insane numbers, I saw this on Chase Stewart's Twitter account. Playoff Lenny.

400 yards, four touchdowns, and one postseason. 400 plus yards. Only guys to do this ever. Playoff Lenny, John Riggins, Terrell Davis, Marcus Allen, Larry Fitzgerald, Thurman Thomas, Hakeem Nix, Jerry Rice, and Emmitt Smith twice. Wow.

Leonard Fournette, who was waived and available and seemed like his career was over. And now, what is he going to get? A $50 million contract this year from somebody? He might. I don't know. I mean, Derrick Henry kept the dream alive for running backs and I guess Fournette, too, after his performance tonight.

Although, I don't know what to think. I don't know. I don't know how you beat a team like the Bucs and Tom Brady. I get it. These teams will go away and teams look great and then they're not. But just phenomenal. I don't know how you beat a team like the Bucs and Tom Brady. I get it. These teams will go away, and teams look great, and then they're not. But just phenomenal. I don't know. And I'm getting a lot of people complaining about the penalty yards.

They did have over 80 yards, the Chiefs, of penalties in the first half. I just wonder if it was a little different, if we'd be gushing over the Bucs right now. But it wasn't. I don't think their line could have blocked for four quarters. Yeah, it was an asker. Do you? No, I don't. I mean't think their line could have blocked for four quarters. Yeah, it was an asker. Do you? No, I don't.

I mean, those two passes, I said, that one drive, I can't even remember what happened, but it was back-to-back passes where Mahomes had to retreat like 25 yards and throw it, and then one hit the player's face mask, and then one just out of the reach in the corner of the end zone. Both would have been great, but they could not get it together. One thing on Brady, 16 to 20 in the first half for 140.

Three touchdowns, no picks. 135.4 QB rating. I mean, one of the reasons I picked him this week was I really felt like he was going to at least come through from the standpoint of he wasn't going to lose the game. And he was going to, whatever the best version of him is at this point at age 43, I felt like we were potentially going to see it. He didn't turn the ball over. Ronald Jones was, and Ronald Jones is anybody who's ever had him on a fantasy team or roots for the Bucks knows is always scary

when he has them. I don't know how many times he's fumbled in his career, but I always feel like he might fumble. And then he did it on that third down after they threw. And we were arguing about whether you should ever throw to the fat offensive lineman. You didn't like that. I hate it. I'm on the record. I hate that play every time.

Here's why I like it. If it works, there's no way the team can lose, whether it's refrigerated Perry going in from one yard or a fat lineman catching it in the end zone. But the fact that that was, that was Chiefs' best two minutes of the game when they stopped them on that. I mean, Ronald Jones had insane momentum to not score.

I still don't know how he didn't score on that fourth down play. Yeah. So they stop him. Chiefs, the Bucs get another stop when it seemed like, oh, here we go. Tyreek's going to have a 99-yard touchdown, and the game's going to be tied. Nope.

They get the punt. There's a penalty on the punt. And it was a great punt. It sent them all the way back to the 30. And we were texting about it. I was saying, like, I think this could be really hard for the Bucs to win. They just gave away seven points.

Right. Right after I send the text, flag on the play, they got to re-punt it. And the- You never see that. The penalty on the, right? Yeah. Rarely see it. It's on the return team, the play. They got to repunt it. And you never see that the penalty on the right. Yeah.

Rarely see it. It's like, it's on the return team. Of course. And then the Casey punter with the long hair Townsend shanks, the second one. So all of a sudden they're back on the 30 and it felt, it felt like the Ronald Jones getting stopped.

It didn't matter, but that whole sequence was weird. It kept the field goal. Right. So they didn't get a touchdown. No, but it felt like it swung the momentum back. Yeah, I mean, just like you said,

those first two drives, the fact that Tampa or Kansas City didn't take advantage, like you were texting, like, I think they blew it there at Tampa by punting those first two drives. That didn't matter. And then the goal line stand didn't matter. I'm like, what is anything going to matter?

It's bizarre what's going on here. The punt over hit was six and a half. That was one of my smaller prop bets on million dollar picks. The seventh punt was the last punt the Bucks did with like three minutes. Oh, was it really? That was so mad.

Let's quickly talk. Actually, let's take a break and we'll talk Chiefs and then we'll break down the props. At Pennzoil, we have one job pioneering a motor oil so advanced. You don't have to think about your motor oil. Instead, you can think about how your engine sounds, how your stomach feels as the RPMs build, how your wheels hug the curves and how with the the Pennzoil Platinum up to 15-year, 800,000-kilometer protection guarantee,

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Score in-store promos, PC Optimum points, and more free time. And still get groceries. Shop now at pcexpress.ca. All right, so the Chiefs. This was a legitimate loss. You could argue they could have lost to the Browns. Sure. Guy fumbles out of the end zone.

Browns, whether that last drive, when it seemed like they were just going to take it down, and all of a sudden, one play, and they're punting, and then Chad Honey finishes the game. All of that, I'm sure if you're a Browns fan, you're watching the night going, eh, we might have been able to do better than the Chiefs. So the Chiefs, they lose the AFC title game, the D Ford game to the Patriots a couple of years ago, they lose this game.

And then last year, third and 15 and my homes makes one of the great plays in Superbowl history. Take the lead Garoppolo. I forget what receiver was streaking down the field. He misses him by a foot. If one of those two plays goes San Francisco's way, the Chiefs still don't have a Super Bowl, and we're

talking about Mahomes and Andy Reid, and we get to do the whole sports radio first take thing. I don't know. We get to do that whole thing. What would you say over or under for this Chiefs, Mahomes, Reid, Kelsey, Tyreek? How many Super Bowl appearances for them, not wins?

Didn't they, when he signed the contract during the pandemic last year, they had two Super Bowl wins over the 10 years? I think they had an over-under for actual Super Bowl wins. I'm of the belief that if every year they're six or seven to one, just keep betting them. As long as this unit stays intact, they'll win in the next three years. Although I thought this would have been one of them. But yeah, that was one thing that Brady wasn't going to allow, right? Don't you think he had that in the back of his head? Like Jimmy G lost a 10 point lead with nine minutes left in the fourth quarter. I ain't doing that. Right. I'm not turning it over. I'm not doing any of that stuff. But like, I think the big thing with the chiefs

is, and again, we're going to take a victory lap here. No one thought it was 31, nine, but I looked at their numbers and we talk about recency bias all the time and the game against the bills. It looked like their offense was back. They could have scored in the forties or fifties. So no one's as good or as bad as they looked the week before. I looked at it. Eight of their 18 games, they scored in the 20s. Brady could score in the 20s, especially if this team could score in the 20s, Kansas City,

if they don't have an offensive line and against this defense as good as it's playing. That's why I always thought it'd be close. So I think there was a lot of pressure on the Chiefs, even though they just righted the ship for really just one week against the bills offensively. Uh, they did okay against Cleveland, obviously until, uh, my homes got hurt, but there was a lot of pressure and a lot of like, uh, there's a no brainer. My homes is a better quarterback. He's, he's winning it. Um, what wasn't the case at all? Um, I mean, nine points was 200 to one odds. My a million dollar picks.

I had Tampa minus three. I had the under plus I had minus Tampa plus three. Sorry. Uh, I had the under, I had four net 60 plus rushing yards with bucks. Win was three to one. And then my big one, Brady under 296.5 passing Fournette over 80. He had 89.

Bucks win was plus 998. That was my big parlay. So I hit those four. And I gotta say, Gratuitous, Fandulpug, I really like their same game parlays. You don't get a lot of those where you can be like, I think

if this team wins, they'll win because this will happen. So I really thought Fournette was going to have a good game today. I'm like, if he has a good game, the bucks are probably going to win. I would like to team those two bets together. This is one of the fun things about the online gambling area is they're now allowing us to do stuff like that. Most bookies won't take bets like that. How many times have I been screaming at hand, uh, at Joe house, like the house, you can't bet Brady over two and a half touchdowns and Moss to score a touchdown and James white to have over six and a half for you. So you can't put that on a parlay. And now thanks to FanDuel, we have that. We can do all that. It's, it's the, one of the few advantages we have. So I was like, I think can do all that. It's one of the few advantages we have.

Right. So I was like, I think Fournette is going to be one of the reasons the Bucks will win. I would like to wager on this. Yeah, you work backwards. On FanDuel, you can. It's more. I lost a lot of my tiny props, but I won on one I was really excited about. There will be a roughing the passer call.

Yes. Plus 155. Oh, nice. That one hit. Figured like Brady and Mahomes that they would try to protect both of them. I had the JPP sack for plus 140. That lost.

I had the six and a half punts under, and then I had some tiny ones, but I ended up for the playoffs, I was a 4.653 fake million dollars this year. Unbelievable. What a fake job this year. So unbelievable. What a fake job I made. Didn't you lose it all? I'll never do that well.

I thought you lost it all in week five. I thought you don't, you have to retire it. I thought that's why you brought Schrader on. No, he tried to win it back. Oh, you just won it back. I told them, I told people heading into week 17,

we're going to win it back. And we won it back. I didn't know you got a marker. You got a marker like David Chang at the Cosmopolitan. You can make up the rules. For the season, I was $3.72 million up on the thing. But you know what this reminded me of?

You and I met. I get a job writing for Kimmel. I moved to California November 16, 2002. We start putting together the show. We're in San Diego. We drive back. It's the first night, Sunday night, Tampa Bay, Oakland. And you and I both love the Bucs.

Mm-hmm. And we had all these Bucs bets. We had defensive touchdown. And we hit everything. Yeah. We stacked the range for the total points and everything. We thought there would be a gigantic amount of points. I know.

That was a nice night. I had that. I had the 2,000 Ravens I know that was a nice night. I had that. I had the 2000 Ravens. I had it. It's happened a few times. It's really fun when you nail the Super Bowl because then some of the props and parlays kind of follow and you just be like, oh, I did it. And then you'll have another year where you miss it and you feel like the dumbest person

on there. I feel good about this one in particularly because I was losing my edge with Brady. I think I'm now four and six and Brady Superbowls. I was like, I can't, I bet on him for the giants games where you guys should have won. And, you know,

I bet against him for Seattle and Atlanta, two nonsensical games that I should have lost. But yeah, let me give you a couple of mine. I had the game would end on a kneel down minus one 55. That was a winner. Uh, clear.

That was minus one 55. That's it. One 55 on a kneel down. Yeah. Interesting. Yeah. Uh, clear. That was minus 155. That's it. 155 on a nail down. Yeah. Interesting. Yeah. Uh, clear Gatorade. It looked blue. I'm going to argue it. I don't know how far I'll take it. You know, I got Giuliani on the case, but I guess it was blue. I had clear. Um, I had, uh, what did I have at Kelsey under a hundred and a half yards. You talk about garbage yards that racked up, but good for Kelsey. Gronk's first under a hundred and a half yards. You're talking about garbage yards that racked up, but good for Kelsey.

Gronk's first catch over seven and a half yards, eight yard touchdown. That was good. Jersey number. Speaking of Gronk, our friends at FanDuel texted me after the Gronk touchdown and said that was the second worst case scenario. Mahomes was the worst case scenario.

Really? Gronk scoring the first touchdown was like an immediate seven-figure loss for Fandle. Oh, that's so good. People, they went Mahomes

on the one end and then Gronk on the other. Yeah, because it's a Hollywood story. Gronk catching the first touchdown. We should have seen it. Well, that might be the end of the same game parlay

is if Fandle's losing all this money. No, come on, Fandle. No, no., FanDuel. I had jersey number over 17.5 for first touchdown. That was a winner. I had heads. And I had a couple things from last night.

Aaron Donald to win defensive player of the year. Just looking at my ledger here. I had Tampa 30, Kansas City 23 as the final score, 170-1. Wait, what was it? 31-9. 30-23. You had a shot. I felt like at halftime I was kind of in it. It was 21-6.

I'm doing the math. I'm like, holy shit. And then I had Tampa defensive touchdown. Bucs win was basically 11-1 odds. Brady to score with the Bucs to win was plus 7-7-7. I had that as a small one, a million-dollar picks. I thought we were going to get it on the fourth and one. It was baby sneak territory.

I know. Where was it? That's the most unstoppable play in sports. I think it was like a yard and a quarter. Otherwise, they might have tried it. Maybe they didn't want him to take the beating. How about this, though? Over a half a touchdown for Kansas City,

you had to do minus 3,500. So if you had Kansas City, no touchdown, you could have gotten, I think on FanDuel, it was 20 to one. I saw it in some spots at 40 to one. No touchdown for the Chiefs between 20 and 40 to one. Bucks to score 31 exactly. Wait a second.

Did they not score a touchdown? They didn't score a touchdown. Oh my God. Three field goals. Oh my God, you're right. I was telling you, it was like six to one that they wouldn't even score in the first score a touchdown? They didn't score a touchdown. Oh my God. Oh my God. You're right. I was telling you, I was like, it was like six to one that they wouldn't even score in the first half of

touchdown. They did not score a touchdown. When did you email me that the chiefs were plus one 84 when it was 10, three? No, no, no. It was,

uh, now I get confused. You said, tell me when it's 14, three, what it is. I'm like, I have to do this.

It's plus one 84. You know, it's funny. You thought it was like even'm like, I have to do this. It's plus 184. You know what's funny? You thought it was even, right? Every point last two years, if the Chiefs fell behind 10 like that, it was always around even. And this time, it was like Vegas knew. They knew, right?

Yeah. They do know. They knew. They knew something. They could probably tell from the 17-step drop back Mahomes was taking. Tampa by 19-24 was 18 to 1. Bucks, like I said, 31 exactly is 14 to 1. Wasn't Tampa minus 10 and a half was like, what was that?

Like plus 400? Yeah, that was like 450 or something. Yeah. I don't know what else to say. I mean, a lot of people lost. I got a lot of notes. 20 to 1 odds that an offensive lineman catches a touchdown so that was rough oof and uh there was no safety

no safety the anthem went over they paused that's just a great way to do it pause between home of the give it a five mississippi count and then say brave went way over to 17 and heads ruin the tails dynasty that tells it at five out of last six years. Heads one. Were there ads for M&M's having the best Superbowl commercial? No, I don't know. I mean, can you, isn't that subjective? That was the most popular one with my kids today.

Oh, was it? M&M's? They love the M&M's commercial. Let me ask you this. You have done it the right way. This was the first time in 20 years I've watched a Super Bowl at my house. I've either been at the game a couple times with you. I've been at Corolla's warehouse or Jimmy's party.

And I think the last one was Rams Titans where I was at my house. If you count it as my house. I was living at Jimmy's house. But anyway, I was home. I'm with my kids. And it was just, it was miserable. I have to say, I was home. I'm with my kids. And it was just, it was miserable. I have to say, I'm like, I'm with these people all the time. They're sick of me too. And they're like, hey, we should do a squares pool. I'm like, why? We're each going to

get 20 squares. I'm going to have to pay for all of them. Why the hell are we doing this? None of you have money. Yeah. They're like, oh, fine. We won't do it then. So, But yeah, we got to get back to where we can all get together again. It's driving me nuts. I was so excited that my dad was here because it's just like anytime you have a guest, it's like a special guest star in a TV series. It's like, today on the Brady Bunch, it's Cousin Oliver. Yeah, it's when Fonzie would visit Laverne and Charlotte.

Yeah, they don't, the reason we're going with old TV shows is I don't think they have special guest stars anymore on TV shows. This is a 60s, 70s thing.

Yeah, my dad was here. It was like, it totally livened up the same four people with the same dogs. This episode is brought to you by Prime Video.

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KC is plus 490. They're the favorite. Tampa Bay plus 950. You'd be betting on the first back-to-back champs. It's the Patriots in the mid-2000s. Buffalo 11-1. Packers 11-1.

Rams 12-1. Niners 13-1. Ravens 14-1. Saints 19-1. Seahawks 20-1. Browns 22-1. Titans 27-1. Dolphins 28-1

Colts 29-1 Any of those jump out at you? I gotta find out where Brady's going Brady said he's running it back In that press conference At age 44 Let me ask you this I was talking to DeGeneres Trifecta about this

If you could have Chiefs, Bucks And Packers for the field, I think those would be about even. Which would you take? Chiefs, Bucks, Packers. I would take the field. You would take the field. So that means you like the Bills or the Rams or the Ravens? Who do you like then?

I like the Rams. I think the Bills have to be taken seriously. They got a nice little taste last year. Right. Seahawks, I think they had a bad luck year and some dumb injuries and stuff like that.

Isn't Watson the X factor, though? Yeah, I know. It's too many. Too many moving parts right now, right? Because I was looking at Miami at 28-1, and I still feel like they're the logical Watson team. And Houston's like, we're not trading Watson. And Miami's like, we're not, we, we like what we have where we've are.

No, we're not even going to discuss that. I'm sorry. If Watson's on the table, you're trading for him. Well, what's weird about this is like, they're like, when's could be traded within a couple of days. I'm like, why, why what's the rush? Wait till the good quarterbacks are gone. Then see if you need him, right? Does Frank Reich really need to play with him? Or then I heard he might go to the Bears. It might be like Wentz for Foles would be hilarious. But why are we doing Wentz first?

It's a QB merry-go-round there. I think certain teams don't want to be left out, right? Right, I guess. But aren't they like four better than Wentz right now? It's all with Watson's like, are you going to play his out, right? Right, I guess. But aren't they like four better than Wentz right now? I, you know, it's all with Watson's like, are you going to play his bluff, right? Is this guy going to sit

in late August or September? If Houston really doesn't think he is, then they're taking a shot there. I hate doing this to you. I really do. I genuinely hate what I'm about to say. No, I hate doing this to you

because it's, you're like a recovering drug addict and I'm just bringing crystal meth into your house and being like, no, no, it'll be fine. I hate doing this to you. Denver is 80 to one. Oh, okay. All right. That's better. Denver. Oh, you thought I was going to do Dallas? Yeah, I thought so. No, I know. I'm not dumb enough to do Dallas. Denver's 80 to one. They have the fourth worst odds in the entire league for the Super Bowl. And I think you and I are both bullish on how much talent they have. They had bad luck last year.

And that to me is a possible Deshaun Watson team. Listen, I love that team. I always love that team. Yeah, we love that team. I can't quit that team and the Falcons either. But yeah, that's my AFC, NFC. I can't quit that team and the Falcons either. But yeah, that's my AFC, NFC. I can't leave. But Watson's born in Georgia, went to Clemson,

was familiar with the Carolinas, went to Houston. Don't you think he's going to end up in the South somewhere? I don't think he goes to Denver. You're probably right. I think he's- Carolina is 50 to 1. Carolina looked like should have gotten Stafford for what they offered. So they offered the number eight Bridgewater, right?

Yeah. And like a five or something. Yeah. That felt like they were kind of doing a favor for the Rams because the guy used to work for the Rams as the Lions GM. He's like, ah, we, we really value Jared Goff. Right. It's the first round pick. Plus the second, first rounder to take for the Rams. It was the Lions GM. He's like, ah, we really value Jared Goff. Right. It's a first round pick.

Plus the second first rounder to take Jared Goff. But they were like, no, no, no. We like Jared Goff. It's like, all right, good luck. I probably would have rather had Bridgewater in the eighth. They would have the seventh and eighth picks. Well, there's a chance they don't. Goff doesn't take a snap, don't you think?

No, I think they're playing them. I think, I think cause they're rebuilding next year anyway. I know, but they got what they wanted out of that deal. They got the picks. They don't have to be a, you know, a slave to Jared Goff being their quarterback. Yeah. But if you're Carolina and you're like, all right, hold on a second. Or I'm sorry.

Houston. And you're like, hold on a second. You offered Bridgewater and the eight for Matt Stafford. 33-year-old Matt Stafford has never won a playoff game. Come this way. Give us the eight. Give us two more first-rounders and give us Bridgewater. And let's have a serious Deshaun Watson conversation.

And if you're Carolina, it's like, I mean, he's from there. That would be the most, that'd be the greatest thing they ever did. I don't know why they wouldn't. Yeah. I don't know. They got to do it. They got that.

That's the way you shake it up. I think that'd be fun. Well, your team's 33 to one. The only other team I'm going to mention from an odd standpoint is the Colts at 29 to one. I think that's a really good value because we know they're going to address QB. I think all of us felt like rivers underachieve for them.

Even if he was pretty good in that playoff game, they have talent on both sides of the ball. They have a lot of blue chippers. I think they have a pretty good coach. Um, I don't mind the division they're in. And I like those odds. Let me ask you this, because I'm looking at that 20 to 30 range. Yeah.

Why wouldn't we believe in the Browns? They got pretty far this year. Odell's coming back. Yeah. Yeah, you're right. Coach wins coach of the year. Here's why you wouldn't believe, because they're the Browns. Sure. But not anymore. Really? Right. They're like a real team. Yeah. I mean, I mean, in that playoff game, if they had fumbled a touchdown out of the end zone

and then lost on a Chad Henney, right. Fourth and one play, I guess we would say they were still the Browns. Oh wait, they're still the Browns. But the way they beat the Steelers. All right. I'm going to upset you now. I got to do it. Is this Brady's greatest Super Bowl? No. The Atlanta one will never be topped. The Atlanta one was unbelievable.

They were down 28 to 3. He won that Super Bowl by himself. He threw for 500 yards. But think about what this means. No, it's Atlanta. It has to be the Atlanta one. He gets the Belichick thing off his shoulder.

It's a little temporary for the most part. Most people will say, oh, it was Brady, not Belichick. He took a team with five losses, which I'm going to weigh in his favor.

He beat Breeze. He beat Rogers. And he beat Mahomes. You're never going to beat three quarterbacks like that. Ever. Maybe no one will ever beat those three in a playoff. And he whipped the crap

out of the defending champs. I think you could say it was his best start to finish playoff run. Because you forgot to throw in Heineke. Alright, that's funny. Beat Heineke when he did that. I think that gave him the confidence. I still think the Atlanta game is the greatest ever. That's the greatest comeback in the

history of the sport. It's a great game. I'm just trying to think of the one. He wins the game by himself and when the game ends, we're all like that is the greatest quarterback of all time. Right, but he's still tied. We've finally seen our savior and it's Tom Brady. I'm with you, but he was still tied

to Belichick at that. I think that means a lot. Wait, can we bring a nephew Kyle for this? Well, Kyle, go ahead. You're going to tied to Belichick at that. I think that means a lot. Wait, can we bring in Nephew Kyle for this? Well, Kyle, go ahead. You're going to have to say one of the Patriot wins. Kyle, what was Brady's best playoff achievement? It was Atlanta. It was Atlanta.

I was like, my stomach was coming through my butt before he started doing that thing. That was just amazing. And so that's it. That'll always be it. That's the single most heroic football performance of all time. At least for the NFL. I guess. But they were 13-point underdog to the Rams, too.

And it had no business probably even being in that Super Bowl. Yeah, but that was like the defense won that game as much as the Brady thing. It was literally all Brady for the entire second half. And by the time we won the coin toss, it's like it's over. I've never seen a guy go into the zone like that as an, in a football game. I bet if you inject, if you put some, some truth serum in his cauliflower and ginger soup and asked him what his best, most favorite and satisfying Superbowl performance was, it'd be this one right here tonight. Well, here's, so there's a couple of factors, right? One is that people thinking he's 43 and he can't do this anymore.

Yep. And that the league has passed him by. Um, you have Rogers winning the MVP and then it's my homes is league. So where does he fit in with all that stuff? Um, the bell check thing. I,

I know that he was really frustrated the last, you know, intermittently, definitely in the mid two thousands when during the Riche Caldwell season, all that stuff. Right. But then once we hit the 2015 and on stretch where they were, Belichick was always going to gravitate toward trading back,

not getting the blue chipper on offense to help Brady, kind of piecing it together and then building the lines and the defense. And I think Brady got really frustrated with that when the pick stopped coming through. Yeah. He was definitely bummed out last year. There's no question. Yeah. All right. So talk to me after Heineke wins his third MVP and then it'll look more impressive. What do you think Belichick's reaction was tonight? Well, I always, did we talk about this last week? I mean, how much would you have paid to watch with Bill Belichick, Bill Simmons, Bill Sr.?

Three in the room. What would you have paid to get that going? I mean, did he watch the game? Was he watching the whole game? Was he just checking in? What do you think he was doing tonight? I think he definitely watched the whole game. Uh-huh.

And I think he'll probably speak publicly about it at some point. I'm very happy for Tom. He'll lie. He wasn't rooting for Tom. No way. The Brady-Belichick thing was an argument for, I don't know, the last 10, 11 years. Who was more responsible for the dynasty? This is a pretty good checkmark for Brady.

I still feel like they both needed each other. I think the way they did it, they needed each other. Like I said, there was nine years in between Super Bowls, and you're not going to do that with just any coach, right? You're not going to do that even with an Andy Reid. I don't think you could do what he did. The bummer, and I've said this before, so I'm repeating it. The bummer is that they didn't figure out a way

to avoid this specific scenario tonight. And I think the only reason they got the Patriots slash New England slash Boston fans actually rooting for Brady and Gronk is because they love those guys. It's because we've won so many titles. And it was one of those things where there wasn't a vindictiveness about it because I think we just like those guys. They brought us a ton of joy. Yeah. But I still feel like they, this could have been solved three, four years ago. The same way it's going on with Rogers and Green Bay right now, where, you know, Rogers

is going to leave with his fiancee, Shailene Woodley. You know, they're going to move to a different city. His fiancee, he met a week ago. You know, he's going to leave. You know, he's not going to finish his career with green Bay. He will not. Why? He just got,

he just got a defensive coordinator. That's responsible for like the 29th and 31st defenses. He's got the worst defensive coordinator league. You know, he's going to leave. Yeah. And they could stop it right now. They could be like,

we've traded Jordan love. We are going to ride this Rogers thing to the bitter end. This guy's great. He's our guy. Here's a new five-year deal for 150 billion with a hundred guaranteed. And we're going to, we're going to run him into the ground one way or the other. They're not going to do it.

Well, here's what I, here's why he might stay. If you're Aaron Rogers and you see Jared Goff's in your division now, and potentially Carson Wentz is coming in to Chicago. Yeah. Trubisky or Wentz. Yeah.

It's like, maybe I'll stick around for a little bit. I might not get better, better deal than that. Can I say one of my favorite words or phrases ever in Belichick's defense? Yeah. In Belichick's defense. Oh. From four years ago, he was playing the math with Brady. It was inconceivable.

Somebody was going to still be good at quarterback at age 43. I Brady. It was inconceivable. Somebody was going to still be good at quarterback at age 43. I certainly thought it was inconceivable as great as Brady was. There was no track record of anybody even winning an NFL start at age 43. Right. And this is like what we're watching when LeBron now LeBron's in year 18 is going to win the MVP this year, unless he gets hurt and it's inconceivable. Nobody thought he would be able to do this in season 18, but he's doing it. So I think if Belichick made a mistake, it was not realizing

all the advancements we have with the food, dieting, the sleep, the fucking hyperbaric chambers, all the other shit that these guys do to try to basically fight off father time. I think he just played the odds and was like,

he now when he's 41, this will be done. And it wasn't. Yeah, but he did still win a Superbowl with them. He wasn't, we scored 13 points. Yeah.

It's still a good team. I don't know. The thing that with Belichick for me is if he could get, take it back, what do you have signed cam Newton, right? Like if you have if you have your backup guys in there and and go seven and nine it's like wow i don't know i give him a little more credit if he's doing it with stidham but um the fact that he went out there

and got cam newton on the cheap for sure uh that was a good gamble i don't think they realized that he was going to lose the ability to throw a completion. Well, you better be part of that carousel. Jimmy G to New England, what kind of odds you put on it? Oh, I think looking at what the Pats threw away this year, I think they knew it was headed that way.

They have, I think, the most cap space out of anybody except one other team. It's a COVID year. The Caps move. I've been reading all this stuff. The cap's moving backwards, and it's going to be like the fantasy draft where all of a sudden everybody has $32 left, and then there's all these good receivers left. You're like, oh, fuck.

Yeah, right. Ugh, Chris Godwin is going to go for $6? Like, what? And then there's that one guy in the draft who's got like, you know, $92. And you're like, oh my God. Yeah, of course he's going to top everybody's bid for the extra dollar. I think that's his plan for this year.

And then you get kicked out of the league at the end. Yeah, I could see that. Then I get kicked out of the league. I won my East Coast League, by the way. You did? Yeah, the one that goes through the playoffs. The greatest idea of all time. I don't know if that exists.

You're going to have to prove it. That's the one that goes all the way through the playoffs and then we redraft. The only four teams make it. It's still like the best fantasy idea. What did you have? You had like three players in tonight's game? I had Evans and Godwin and I had Kelsey and Tyreek Hill and Suckup. What? Those were my guys that I had left. And then someone else has

the other guys? The guy who went into it, who was the first place, who went into it with Mahomes and Brady and Russell Wilson and all these dudes. See, I beat him. This is dumb. It was fun. Well, I'll tell you this. Who was playing fantasy football five weeks later

than the other person? It was me. I guess so. It was more fun. So your team, Brady and anti-Belichick on this. I think this was his best win. It was more fun. So your team, Brady and anti-Belichick on this. I think this was his best win. Yeah, I do. I'm sorry. His best run, his best run.

Breeze Mahomes Rogers. You know, when they talk about like NCAA teams, like they beat Duke, Michigan State and Villanova. Like, wow, that's a pretty good run. Yeah, maybe they should be considered one of the best. Like this is doesn't get better than that. Unless you beat Tom Brady, which he can't do because he's Tom Brady.

So you think it was better than beating Flacco, Roethlisberger, and Wilson back to back? I mean, it was a good, I mean, you know, you laugh, but obviously that was great for the time. Can I just make a point about when there's a blowout in the Super Bowl? We want to see two things. We want to see, uh, CBS.

We want to see if someone runs on the field, please show them. Cause that's fun. Uh, and they don't do it because they don't want to encourage more people to run in the field. I feel the complete opposite. They should always show the person. They went to a commercial. They're like, well, our director's going nuts.

We got to get out of here. We got to, we'll, we'll, we'll re we'll regroup after this. And we want to see the color of the Gatorade. How do they miss the Gatorade? There should be one camera in charge of the Gatorade the whole time. Couldn't agree more. How do we miss that? I didn't see it till like 40 minutes after the game.

When Sal and I were growing up, there was somebody who used to run on the field and baseball Morgana, the kissing bandit. Yeah. Who had, um, I I'm just going to say it. The biggest breasts probably of anyone of that era. Sure. And she, um, I I'm just going to say it, the biggest breasts probably of anyone

of that era. And she would run out, no bra and run out and kiss this kiss whoever. And it was the single most exciting thing that could happen during a baseball game. Like somebody could have five home runs in a game and it was not as exciting as Morgana, the kissing bandit. I missed those days. So when did they decide to not show it? Cause they showed it back then. We saw it, right? We would see it on the telecast. So what year, what year did they stop? Cause no one really runs on the field anymore, right? Like you see when Hank Aaron passed away, they showed his 715th home run over and over. And these two hippies are accosting him. Right. They're running with him. And this guy had death threats, you know, for the,

a month leading up to the record-breaking home run. He's like, hey, guys, what's up? He's like, oh my God, how does that go on? But that stopped, I think, around 82, 83, right? You don't see fans charge a field. It stopped with fever pitch with Jimmy Fallon and Drew Barrymore when she, first of all,

jumped out of the center field bleachers, which anybody would die if that happened. It's at least 20 feet. And then ran across Fenway and navigated this whole they got back together thing for like two minutes and everybody, the game stopped and they just let it happen. After that, they were

just gone too far. You would have hated it if it wasn't Boston. I hate that movie. Oh, you do? Okay. I hate that movie with every ounce of my body. I was going to say, the person who wrote that movie came up with the idea for your playoff fantasy league. It's the same person. It has to be. That's bullshit.

All right, now it's time for Parent Corner brought to you by CarMax. Don't just buy your next car. Love your next car with CarMax. Love your car guarantee. Our friends at CarMax know that buying a car is a big deal. And with their new Love Your Car Guarantee, you can take your time to make sure it's the right car for you. Starting with a 24-hour test drive,

drive it to work, to school, to the grocery store before you buy. And if it feels right, you've got a full month and 1,500 miles to keep on driving with their new 30-day money-back guarantee. It's the new Love Your Car Guarantee from CarMax. Learn more today at CarMax.com. All right, cuz you're on the clock. Well, first of all, before parent corn, I want to hats off to Ricky Seals Jones, who was a pregame scratch. He was my Gary Russell prop

of the year. I had him to catch the make the last reception for the chiefs and he was a healthy scratch or some kind of scratch before the pressure was too much for him. Sorry, RSJ. We'll come back next year. Once he heard he was the Gary Russell pick, he just couldn't handle it. I can't do it. It's just enough. You're about to die. It's too much being in this game.

My parent corner happened about 10 minutes after we stopped recording last week because we recorded before the Royal Rumble. And I came out, and then the Royal Rumble was about to start. And for that thing, my family did pick numbers for the Royal Rumble pool. So there's five of us and there's 30. So we each got six names. And my littlest Harrison, who was the only one in the family who hasn't won this and just ends up in tears every single time he loses because it's him down to the last two. And not only is it him down to the last two,

he'll have like three wrestlers left. And my oldest will have one and it'll just like nickel and dot one, one, one, and then it'll be one-on-one and a lose. So this time he had edge and my wife had Randy Orton and edge. God bless him. He lasted to the very end.

He somehow sat in the corner for 45 minutes. It's amazing how they do that with the old guys. They either sit in the corner or they just go backstage with a fake injury and come back. Well, Randy Orton, they thought it was a fake injury, right? They said, yeah. So he was legitimately gone for the hour or whatever. So it ends up edge is the last one in the ring, but we know Randy Orton hasn't been eliminated because they walked him to the locker room. Here comes Randy Orton, RKO. That's my wife's guy. But somehow, Edge recovers and throws Orton over the top rope.

The little one wins. I posted on Instagram. He's going crazy, high-fiving everyone. My wife is just relieved that she didn't win because the little one would have had a little conniption. And anyway, as he's celebrating, I lower an elbow onto the little one's head and he goes, he gets, he has a running start into the chair and the hard part of the chair. And now he's crying and now I'm the big asshole in the family. So I need two things to happen.

I need him to recover quickly. Right. I need, it can't be a bad injury. I need the family to not hate me. Right. So this is, this is a tall order. So the injury is not, it's not subsiding anytime soon, but he's taken to the offensive. He's now punching me. He's now

going to chase me. I'm like, okay, in a way, this is good for me because he's not just writhing in pain. So he punches me and I'm at the height and he's at the height where every punch is either to the base of the spine. I was going to say that's such a bad age, right? Balls are spine every time. And I'm not tall. If I were a little taller, I'd be okay, but I'm not right. Base of the spine. And he is cracking me with all his might and I'm trying to sell it. And I'm like, I don't even have to sell these punches. He's really beaten the hell out of me. So he won the Royal rumble. He got everyone, all on the family to get, uh, be mad at me. And he got the best of his old man, all three in one. Good job by you, Harris.

Yeah, great job, Harris. Yeah, the pay-per-view that could never happen is a six-year-old against their adult father. And the six-year-old gets all the punches for the first five minutes. Yeah. And if the dad can survive, then he can fight back. Right. Because I do feel like in five minutes, the kid would finish off the dad every time.

It's too many ball spine hits. I think that's smart. I would need like four protective cups on. Yeah, I wouldn't be able to survive otherwise. I do think when you think about nature and God and stuff and how they create things, I do think they know if you have boys, you're less likely to keep having kids

when one of the kids is now six and punching repeatedly in the nuts. Right. Yeah. It's a, it's a weird way of controlling the population. I say that to my wife. I'm like, yeah, you had to give birth three times and that sucks. But, uh, I get grazed in the nuts and I'm out of commission for three minutes, like, uh, you know, seven to 10 times a year for, you know, 45 years. How many times each son with the dad, if it's kind of the kind of son we have, how many nut punches do you think you take over the course of like that whole run? I would say it's at least 40. Oh, yeah.

40 is what? What run are we talking about? I'm saying like from age five to age eight. Yeah, yeah, yeah. One a month? Sure. Yeah, one saying like from age five to age eight. Yeah. Yeah. One a month. Sure. Yeah.

One a month. Easy. Yeah, I think so. And also like the hard punches in the back when you're not looking, my son now who's like, he's probably five. I think he's five,

six. His voice is somehow deeper than mine. He's starting to size me up. I feel like he, he's starting to think like I could probably take him in a fight. Uh, there's been a couple of times where he's just like called up and punched me and I'm like, hey, I'm still going to kick your ass. I'll call child services.

It's like, so wait, your punches hurt. You're five, six and strong and I just have to sit here and get the shit kicked out of me. You know what? How great would it be if you hired a bodyguard? Just follows you around the house. Maybe it's an ex Celtic. Like it's a, it's a chief chief it's Robert Parrish or somebody he just hangs out with you and protects you from Ben well what really sucks for me is with no with the COVID Kyle can't come

over and hang out because I feel like he would completely beat the hell out of Kyle oh yeah it's like this big lovable teddy bear and I wouldn't be taking the same kind of abuse uh my parent corner. So as we've mentioned many times, I have the puppy Murph, who's now three and a half months old, who has the biggest feet, head, tail. We think he might end up being 80 pounds. My wife's starting to break because he just can't stop the accidents. And it's like, you have to constantly be on it.

If you don't walk him for, if you don't let him out for an hour, all of a sudden he'll just do like the, uh, exorcist pee right in front of you. Remember the exorcist when she pees in front of, and he'll just stare you right in the eyes. He's doing it.

It's just kind of, you know, like just boom. And it's loud now. Cause he's tall. It's, it sounds like thunder. So my wife's been losing it. And it's loud now because he's tall. It sounds like thunder.

So my wife's been losing it. And Thursday night, she goes in the guest room because my dad is flying in from Massachusetts. And she's getting the guest room ready. And it's dark. The door's open. And she walks in. And then all of a sudden, I hear this screaming. And I think she's getting murdered.

Like that's how upset she is. She's screaming. The dog has taken just this massive shit in the guest room and it's dark. And she steps in it with both feet in these slippers that she loves. And I go up and it's like the smell it's like, it's like Amityville horror. And so now it's like, we,

we have this thing, the Bissell, which by the way, anybody who has a puppy, it's like these water vacuums that can kind of get rid of stains and stuff. So I bring the Bissell up, bring the thing. She's got her slippers are ruined. She's going nuts. She's yelling at us.

Ben's laughing, which is making it worse. And it's just this 25 minute, just a nightmare. She's like so mad. She's like crying, but not even crying. It's like anger crying. And she's like saying, keep that puppy away from me. Keep him away. Keep him away.

I will kill him. Keep him away. So now I'm keeping him down. So whole meltdown. How you're not laughing? Just Ben's laugh? Everybody in my house would be laughing at this. I'm scared.

I'm scared for the puppy. Because I'm like, she's so mad. I don't know what just came up. Right. And then we can't light a candle either because Zoe almost burned down our house candle four weeks ago. So now all the windows are open. So anyway,

um, so then Friday, my dad's there and he's sitting at the kitchen table and Murph, of course we forget. Murph does the exorcist pee right in front of us. Great. All right, so she runs upstairs and gets the Bissell. She's mad.

My dad has just gotten there. He's so excited to see his grandkids. Spend their 20 minutes sitting there. She's yelling. She comes back down with the Bissell, and it's like a water vacuum. Cleans it, and then as she pulls it off, she kind of trips, and the water spills all over the carpet.

And it's like the shit water from the night before it needs to be drained. It doesn't. So now it's this giant shit water thing. Oh, another meltdown. And then it's like, get that puppy away from me, get them away.

So now I have to take him. And it was just, my point is don't get a fourth dog. That's my final lesson I love that the parent corners Have become about the dogs now You give the kids a break And the kids don't help They all lied

The kids are liars No It's like Me and my wife Doing all this The kids are fucking useless And don't I know it's a pandemic

And you need some light In your life And I do love this dog, but, uh, it, it, it's been a nightmare.

The dog just shit. Everyone pack your things. We're moving to house number 11. Here's a map. Uh, I, uh, I,

I don't know what to do. I think I'm really worried about this dog. That's rough. I don't know. I thought he I think I'm really worried about this dog. That's rough. I don't know. He's really got to make it through this. Does she want him to be an outdoor dog now or he can't? I don't know. He might be a leaving dog.

That was our final paracorn. Oh, man. Sad. I'm really sad about this. And I want to, I don't want to get mushy, but I want to thank football. And I know you hate Roger Goodell, but my God, they did it. They did it. So what?

The Broncos had to start a wide receiver at quarterback. And we had to see a couple of Tuesday games. But they got through this. You and I are screaming, oh, they got to move week 17. They got to at least move it two weeks. They freaking did it. And I know it was because of arrogance. And I don't know what to say, but thank you, football, for getting through it.

I mean, we're almost one barbershop visit, barber visit, away from not having a Super Bowl, which is insane to me. Incredible arrogance. Yeah. A complete disregard for safety and health. And they just plowed through and they got it done. And I got to say, like, Goodell's been more impressive than Adam Silver

the last six months. Yeah. What were the odds of that? Like, 20 to 1? Right. Adam's like, he's like, hey, we're going to have the All-Star game. Who the fuck wants an All-Star game?

Don't have an All-Star game? Nobody wants this. What are you doing? That's like Goodell would have done that. Yeah. You know what? Especially now, because LeBron is the favorite to win MVP.

And I don't know if you remember, but last year, Giannis, it was like up in the air and then everyone got to see Giannis dunk during the All-Star game. And it's like, oh, now he's minus 450. So LeBron's like, nah, screw this. We're not playing an All-Star game. Yeah, it's smart. And LeBron will squash it

single-handedly. But honestly, Adams got to start looking at some of this stuff. Like, would Goodell do this? And if the answer is yes, maybe reconsider it. He's probably like, what am I supposed to do?

We bubbled. We did everything right last year. The NFL didn't bubble. And they did it. I mean, the fact that it's once a week actually ended up helping because once they utilized

Wednesday and Tuesday, it worked out for them. I am also very relieved and delighted that we had football, that we were able to do our Sunday night pod every week. We got Brady Mahomes. We didn't miss any weeks. At one point, it seemed like this will take 19 weeks to finish the season, and by the time we finish the playoffs, it'll be March.

That didn't happen. Yeah, then we got Brady Mahomes. Brady won his seventh and God only knows what he's got left in the tank. Yeah. All right, that was Parent Corner brought to you by CarMax. Don't just buy your next car. Love your next car with the CarMax.

Love your car guarantee. Check them out today. CarMax.com. Hey, one last thing before we go. So we had a lot of people help out with your book trying to... Yeah, I want to thank everybody. Everyone really knocked it out of the park.

Get it on the bestseller list. We don't understand the bestseller list anymore because you definitely sold a top 50 in most amount of copies, but then the New York Times gets to look at the list and go, eh.

And there seems to be some creativity with the list that isn't just books sold. So somehow you missed by a spot. You want to get into this because you're going to write more books and I know you don't want to piss off the New York Times. No, I'm never in New York. Oh, you're not? Because I'm not either. So let's just tee off here. But no, I think it's supposed to be top 15 and I had more sales than two in the top 15, but I was out of the top 15. So it's not,

it's just a book club. It's not a bestsellers list. Right. But I do want to thank everybody for contributing and, and everybody who bought, uh, I did 59 interviews and, um, thank you everyone for having me on.

It was, uh, it's a nice little run. It was an excellent book. You can't lose them all. Uh, available at Barnes and Noble. People can still buy it.

And Amazon. I probably shouldn't even mention Amazon. Cause that was one of the things that apparently sunk me too many amazon uh yeah what are these rules it's like the challenge when tj lavin starts making up these new rules before the uh elimination it's like what well yeah i mean you did everything you could you even went on part of my take to try to promote it he did whatever it it took to try to get there. Yeah, I didn't send them a book, though. But yeah, they were

annoyed at that. Yeah, no, thanks for everyone. And again, it's still out there if you want it. Well, if you want to hear Sal, he's got his Extra Points podcast. He's still with the Against All Odds dudes, which I never get invited on.

I really, like, once a year I get invited. Nah, like, I don't know. I feel like I could be invited. Can you add to this gimmick? So I put up $5,555 to anyone who could produce a FanDuel ticket, a losing FanDuel ticket that demonstrated the worst beat of the week. So if you had, like, an offensive lineman on a parlay at 20-1 and you went 4-5 on the parlay if you had like that, an offensive lineman to on a parlay at 20 to one, and you went four to five on the parlay, you show me that. And if it's legit, I'm going to fly Harry

out or Harry's going to drive to wherever and hand you $5,555 in cash. Am I missing something? Is it, should Harry be wearing something or carrying something else? You've seen Harry. Harry, well, what if the person's in like Maine? Well, it can only be like seven states, right? Oh, yeah, you're right. Colorado, West Virginia, you know, Illinois, all those. You know, he told me he doesn't have anything to wear.

He has no cold weather clothes. I think you should make Harry, make him wear like a Halloween costume. Yeah, which one? Dress him like a Lord of the Rings character or something. But we need to do that. I will, I guess like a Harry Potter character. Right.

He's like a wizard. I'm worried he's never going to get there with the money. Like this isn't a, this isn't a sociological experiment here. I give him the cash. Does he get all the way across country with the cash to hand to the person at their door? Well, he's going to eat like what? Four or five times a day.

Yeah. And if there's a native American casino in that town or within 40 miles that that money's gone, he'll be doing that. When are we going to go to Vegas again? You think what's the over under for that? I am. Uh, the plan is, boy, we talked to our guy, David Chang, by the way, I'll be on his podcast on the ringer. Uh, I believe Thursday. Um, yeah, we talked to our guy, David Chang. By the way, I'll be on his podcast on The Ringer, I believe, Thursday. Great. Yeah, he kind of shied us away from Vegas a little bit, right? He basically scared me from Vegas. That was my takeaway from the long text that he sent.

It was, don't go to Vegas. Yeah. Yeah. Well, my 50th birthday is in July. That's the plan to have a big bash there. So maybe, um, maybe we're vaccinated by then. Who the hell knows?

I think, I think maybe that will be enough time. That's the first one. July, right? Yep. July. Don't you think? Let's do it.

I might go no matter what. 50. I've had enough. Yeah. So another great season. This was our 14th season together on the Guess the Lines podcast. Unbelievable. Six.

How many? Six less than Brady? Will he ever catch us? I don't know. We should say we're retired when Brady retires and we'll still get to go another nine seasons. That's good. Thanks. It's been a great year.

And yeah, I'm with you. I'm glad we got through it. And I still can't believe it. When you wanted to start that fantasy league, I'm like, oh, you on a world of hurt. There's going to be 47 lineup changes at 12.58 p.m. Eastern time. And you're going to have to be responsible for them.

But no, it all was pretty smooth. And thanks to FanDuel for giving us all the lines and all that stuff. And thanks to CarMax, who we might be hitting up because you have a son and I have a daughter who is about to get a driver's license this summer. That's right. So we might have to figure out some gimmick with CarMax. When does your dog get to drive? I hope the dog makes it through the summer. It really might. My wife just moved out.

I mean, that might be where it goes. She might just try to get away from all of us. She might be moving in with you. That's crazy. Well, she's welcome here anytime. That'll be an extra Royal Rumble number for her. All right, Sal, last time this year. Good job on you. Good job on you, buddy. All right, that's it for the podcast. Back with two more on this feed this week, plus the rewatchables. Stay tuned. Taxi Driver.

Me, Sean Fantasy, Bill Hader. That is coming Monday night. See you then. We saw that I don't have. I don't have.