The Bill Simmons Podcast - An All-Time-Dumb Pats Loss, Dallas Stumbles, Detroit’s Thriving, and More NFL Weirdness With Cousin Sal

Episode Date: December 19, 2022

The Ringer’s Bill Simmons is joined by Cousin Sal to discuss the Cowboys’ overtime loss to the Jaguars, the Patriots’ puzzling last-second loss to the Raiders, Commanders-Giants, AFC/NFC playoff pictures, Colts-Vikings, Lions-Jets, takeaways from Dolphins-Bills, the Chiefs barely surviving the Texans, Bears-Eagles, and more (1:24). Then they guess the lines for NFL Week 16 (40:39), before ending the show with Parent Corner (1:11:54). Host: Bill Simmons Guest: Cousin Sal Producer: Kyle Crichton Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hey, I know we're entering a big holiday week, but The Ringer is not going away. We're going to be publishing stuff on TheRinger.com. We're going to be publishing podcasts. I'm going to be publishing my podcast on Tuesday night and Thursday night, like always. And then on Sunday night, Christmas night, Sal and I are still doing a pod. Week 17 games, got to talk about them. So The Ringer is not going away. This episode is brought to you by my old friend, Miller Lite.

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Have new rewatchables coming on Monday night. It is a Will Smith movie. That is your hint. And then that's the second to last rewatch of us. Then we have one last one on December 26th that is an absolute banger. I cannot wait for that one. Ending the year with a bang, actually,

with a couple of good ones. And then in January, we're going to be doing a really fun gimmick that I'm excited about. So there you go on that. Coming up on this podcast, the cuz, his team had a terrible loss and then my team said, watch this, and had one of the worst losses in regular season history.

We're gonna talk about that and a whole bunch more. First, our friends from Pro Gym. all right cousins house here we're taping this at 840 Sunday night. We've done a lot of podcasts since 2007 on Sunday nights and Monday mornings. And I don't remember a night where both of our teams took it in the chin in the worst ways possible. I thought yours was going to be bad. Just the chin? I think it was other parts of the body, too. I feel sore. I feel really sore.

Well, you went first. Jacksonville-Dallas, big comeback, and you blow it in OT. And then the Pats were like, hold my beer. Where do you want to start with, Pats or Cowboys? We can get the Cowboys out of the way because it wasn't that big a deal. I mean, we're not going to the Super Bowl or anything. But, you know, Dak Prescott kind of sucks right now. We don't have a second receiver. The defense plays hard when it wants to.

We had Trevor Lawrence dead to rights, and, you know, we lose a dumb game. And you know what? I have to be honest with you. Now I don't have to curse out my family on Christmas Eve watching that Eagles game. So if we can't win as a five seed against Tampa Bay, fine, whatever. Terrible loss, Typical loss. We can move on. What was

your biggest lead in that game? 18? I think it was 17-0? 17? 20-3? Something like that. That's nothing. That's nothing in this day and age. There was one part after the Jacksonville one and they

cut to McCarthy in the sideline and he was just kind of wandering around. Like he just missed his bus. Yeah. I didn't know where it was going. It was like, I think he forgot he had to go shake the coach's hand and then he had to do one 80 and walk out.

But, uh, it was pretty brutal. I, my big lesson from that Cowboys Jags game is just, I don't know who the third best team in the NFC is anymore. Because after Philly and then San Francisco, from what we saw from Minnesota on Saturday,

I certainly wouldn't give them the three spot. I wouldn't give you guys the three spot. I wouldn't give the two teams we just watched on Sunday night the three spot. So it might just be a two-team conference. Yeah, I'm not going to argue with you. I think, although I do like the way, I think the Vikings are going to get upset as a two-seed. And then, well, either way, the Vikings are going to get upset,

whether a two- or three-seed. And then the Eagles are going to have to play with Giants, Seattle, Washington, whoever's in there. And so the Cowboys will be able to avoid the Eagles in the second round. I'm getting way ahead of myself here. I'm thinking we're going to be Tom Brady who looked awful today. I don't know where you want to start, but I'm getting way ahead

of myself here. But I somehow made this into a positive. Well, who's playing better, Detroit or Dallas, the last month? You would say Detroit, right? Detroit's quarterback is playing better. Detroit's, I think, won seven of eight? Six of seven? Six in a row.

Six in a row, I think, right? They were one in six? Yeah. Yeah. I'm not sure they're a playoff team. I felt like the Giants were a playoff team despite the way that game ended. I felt like that...

If you would have told me they were the team that lost and didn't have the week off, it seemed like they were much more prepared for Washington than Washington was for them, which was weird because Washington had just played them and then had the week off. But I know, I thought that was going to be such an advantage for Washington.

You play a team, you get a bye week, you play them again. The giants were so much better coach. We have, we're in a little fantasy matchup right now in the playoffs. Yeah. And I had Bryan Robinson.

Every time they gave him the ball, he ran for between 8 to 12 yards. And the last time they gave him the ball with like four minutes left, he ran for 18 yards. And then they took him out of the game. And they had first down, second down, third down. Heineke fumbled. They lost it. We never saw him again.

He finally comes back in on third and one because somehow Heineke didn't score on that scramble where it just seemed like all he had to do was put his shoulder down and he probably would have barreled into the guy. So third and goal from the one, they bring Robinson in. And then there's this goofy penalty where the wide receiver wasn't all the way on the line of scrimmage. Not goofy. Good call.

Good call. I saw it right away. I was like, why are they called? Let's set the table here. First of all, you call me out on Saturday like a wussy little sissy girl. You call me out. It's game two of 16 of the weekend. You're like, Sal's team sucks.

I'm getting screwed. Jefferson's hurt. All this stuff. It was the first game. Oh, it's second game. You're right. It's the second game. Thursday game.

Yeah, Thursday game. I know I had a good game from Kittle. I was the first game. Oh, it's second game. You're right. It's the second game. Thursday game. Yeah, Thursday game. I know I had a good game from Kittle. I was getting lucky. Your team is better. But now I have an 11-point lead going into tomorrow night, and you have Christian Watson. You're going to beat me with Christian Watson again. So none of this matters.

No, you have a 13-point lead because you got the Washington fumble that they haven't counted yet. Oh, is that right? I'm watching the Minnesota game on Saturday coming off Kittle, who I thought, I didn't even know was still in the league and had two touchdowns, did his whole thing. Jefferson gets hurt.

But yeah. By the way, they shouldn't have let him back in that game. That was irresponsible of the Vikings to let him back in the game, which was a blowout. Should have arrested everybody. But yeah, he came back. You made up 50 points on me with Burrow and Chase in the second half. I was losing my mind. I was like seething.

And then you still have the nerve to complain. I'm going to complain right now. You were 6-8. You snuck in in some weird loophole. I don't even know how you got in the playoffs. I won my last six. I was a three seed. And now my whole season comes down to Christian Watson. You have Brian Robinson

and Zendonovan Knight or whatever his name is as your running back. How far should your team go? Honestly. Two guys you picked off the waiver wire. Can we just say that fantasy football every year, whatever, now it's week 15 used to be week 14. It's just

a reminder how stupid all of it is. Speaking of stupid, my team, I can't believe we went seven minutes without talking about one of the worst losses. Let's get into it. In football history. But it really wasn't because nobody cares about either of these teams.

They're not... Oh, come on. But they're not ever going to... Neither of these teams was a threat in the playoffs. I was talking to my dad after, and we were kind of upset about the game, but also we suck. So we were going to be a seven seed and we were going to lose to a two seed. But regardless, it was the dumbest Patriots loss of my lifetime. I think it's on the short list

with Jim Marshall, Leon Lett, Gary Premian, all these things that we grew up, Joe Pasarczyk, all these things that we grew up listening to, the dumbest losses. And this I had never seen at any level. Had you ever seen a lateral intercepted for a touchdown and a tie game to end the game? No, which made me think, is there any chance that he thought you guys were losing by one or losing the game? Because if I'm him, I think you save a little bit of face at the post-game press conference if you say, I'm sorry, I thought we were losing. I think that's a little more admirable than, no, no, no, I was going to throw this across the field and see if we can get a touchdown out of this.

Well, he said he didn't see Chandler Jones because Chandler Jones was 40 yards away from the player, 30 yards, whatever. And I think he just saw Mack and he whipped it back, but he just should have gone down. The thing that sucks, he's one of the best Patriots just like as a as a story as puts

the work in and it was like why couldn't this have been Nelson Aguilar who screwed up and had two more drops again today listen he was gonna I was thinking he might be cut but they just announced he's been promoted to starting quarterback give me a drum roll there Kyle give me a drum roll there, Kyle.

Give me a drum roll after that. They said it was a fumble touchdown. I don't know why that's not an interception touchdown. Oh, really? What did you want to call it? You had some fun names for this play. The lethal lateral in Las Vegas. Lethal lateral, maybe.

Oh, that's not bad. I was thinking it's the Hail Scary. Hail Scary is good. Hail Scary is good. How about Choker las vegas well that's good that's all right too how about uh failing in jacoby oh nice all right jacoby's listen yeah how about uh uh jacoby my Myers is a fucking idiot. That could be what the Vegas vomit. Oh,

nice. All right. Well, either way, Hench wanted to call it the hail moron, but I thought that was, that was too strong. Regardless,

the short list of worst Patriots losses ever, because I know people want, want to hear the good stuff, like my dumb list. So a couple of years ago, the Miami lateral play where Gronk was playing free safety and they had like seven laterals and then Gronk was in the wrong spot

and that guy scored. Remember that game? I think Brady's last season. We were 17 and a half point favorites that game. And we lost and that screwed up the whole thing and then they ended up losing the playoffs. Joe Ferguson. So I'll put this on Twitter after I post the podcast

and I'll put this clip under. 1981 Patriots who were terrible. Buffalo has the ball. There's 35 seconds left. They're on their own 20. They throw this long pass to Roland Hooks who catches it on the 40. They come back down and they do one of those

35-yard blue pale Marys that gets bounced right to Roland rolling hooks again. So we lose. That was the year we got the first pick and somehow took Ken Sims. There was the 2004 game near and dear to our hearts when we think about our worst gambling losses. The year that the three-team teases won like 10 weeks in a row.

Oh, Monday night, right? Monday night. A.J. Feely is your Miami quarterback. They come down. They score with like two minutes and 10 seconds left. So they cut it to five. Brady gets the ball. Brady's getting sacked and just kind of wings it.

Do you remember this play? Just kind of throws it up for grabs. Miami gets it. Miami ends up winning 29-28. And that's the last game the 2004 Pats lost. So that was a bad one. And then the 4th-2 game when they went for it on 4th-2 from their own 28

and caused a riot. And then all the advanced metrics and the nerd community was like, no, no, it was the right idea. And it's like, well, it was the right idea because we didn't get it. And it turned into this whole debate. So I think those are the worst of my lifetime. I can't even do it for the Cowboys because the Leon Lett one is terrible. And it was Thanksgiving.

Romo snap is the worst one, right? I don't even know. Yeah. I don't even know if I put the Romo snap. You're going to make me cry again. I think Blood Diamond is like 16 years old last week. But even really the Dak one where he couldn't line up for the snap against the 49ers and the Plebs. I don't even know if that's top 10.

It's embarrassing. You just don't want to lose in an embarrassing fashion, right? Even if your Patriots aren't going far, you don't want people hounding you all week about this loss because it was so embarrassing. So I wrote down Jim Marshall, Leon Lett, the Deshaun Jackson when he dropped

the ball before he scored, which was one of the great fantasy football moments of all time too. Remember that was a Monday night. It swung a bunch of fantasy matchups. Dwayne Rudd, remember the Cleveland Browns linebacker? They stopped somebody in fourth and one and he whipped his helmet off and he got the

unsportsmanlike conduct and it led to the field goal. That was a great one. Pasarczyk. I think this has to count, the butt fumble, even though it wasn't like a boneheaded play, but it was so weird. It's like a cousin. And then that fake Colts punt that Chuck Pagano called

when all the guys went to the right, and it was just the center, and there were three pats, and they were kind of like... Snapped immediately. And they just sacked him. I think those are the dumbest there were three pats. They just sacked them. I think those are the dumbest plays we've ever seen. Then Jacoby Myers, I think, has got to be near the top, right?

Those are good. Is there a dumber play than Jacoby Myers? Honestly, I'm truly questioning if he thought they were down a point. It's like fouling in a tie game in basketball. Who would have thought I would have bring up basketball? It was like the J.R. Smith play.

No, that was like the J.R. Smith game, one of the 2018 finals. Same kind of thing. Was there a guy behind Jones or was he throwing in front of Jones? He saw Mac Jones and I think he was throwing it to where, so he would run forward for it.

And I think he was just blocked. Chandler Jones, he was just hanging out. And then, I mean, on top of it, see the Myers play, whatever. He's trying to do too much. It's in the moment. But Mack Jones' tackle was one of the worst tackles in the history of football.

Right. I mean, it's not like Chandler Jones, he wasn't even running. He was standing there and then he just kind of went over him like he was six years old. Grab onto his leg. Hold onto him. If he stole

your wife's purse on the street and you were grabbing the guy, would you just let the guy just run you over and keep going? You'd grab some part of his body, right? It's so terrible. Okay, worst, top five worst purse snatchings in history. Let's go.

I got three. Well, there were so many bad things about this game. First of all, Mac was 13 for 31 for 112 yards. He had one of the most abysmal inside the five-yard line in the first half sequences we've ever had. They called two timeouts, they had to delay a game. He had the worst tackle I've ever seen. And then Belichick after the game said

they couldn't throw a Hail Mary because Mac Jones can't throw at 55 yards. Wow. That was the actual thing he said in the press conference. And then all these people, Pat's people were like, look at this playing college when he threw at 55 yards. So who the fuck knows what to believe.

They're two and 13 on third down. They are last out of everyone in red zone efficiency. They are 32nd, and it's one of the many reasons they lose other than all the dumb fumbles. This game, they had the ball. They're up seven with 3-09 left. They have the ball. They go one-yard run, false start, another two-yard run,

third and 11, and they do this design rollout for Mack, which was a great play if it was third and one, but it run third and 11 and they do this design rollout for mac which was a great play if it was third and one but it was third and 11 so he gets chased down they punt the raiders get a fourth and ten to freaking mac collins and then they score a touchdown where the guy's foot is out of bounds right and they're like we didn't see enough to overturn and it's like you mean the part where where half of his foot's out of bounds? So that counted, and then we blow it in the last 30. I mean, this was an awful loss. But he's, what, 32 wins away from Halas or something?

Yeah. From, sorry, from Shula. But this might make you want to quit. Your name is now associated with one of the worst walk-off losses ever. And you're a situational football guru. Let's take a break because I want to tackle that.

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Okay, give it up. Give what up? Really? Really, really. This message is brought to you by Metrolinks. All right, Sal. Kyle, turn the TikTok camera on sadly. Uh-oh.

There it is. It's time. Belichick needs to retire. Oh, no. Yeah, he does. He needs to retire. And I actually went back. I wrote this column in 2006 after that Bill Parcells season when the Cowboys lost. And Parcells, remember he just kind of lost it?

It was kind of sad. I was like, man, remember Parcells when Parcells was an awesome coach and now it just looks like he's taking paychecks and he's out of it and you're doing dumb stuff and it's uncharacteristic and the game management's bad. And I had this speed limit corollary where it was like after coaches turned 55, it starts to get dicey. And I went through all the history and pointed out all these different examples.

Now people are coaching when they're a little bit older. Him and Pete Carroll are the oldest coaches in the league. Belichick is 69 and Carroll is 70. The third oldest is Andy Reid, who's 64. And Lovie Smith is 64. But for the most part, once you get in the 60s, it's pretty unusual. But then you think back to like, remember Tom Landry when he got old? How old was he when they let him go? He was only 64. But remember those last few years? It was like,

oh man, Landry's so old. He's just lost it. He's five years younger than Belichick. Shula, same thing. I was like, oh man, Landry's so old. He's just lost it. He's five years younger than Belichick. Shula, same thing. I was like, oh man, this is kind of sad. Don Shula, it's ending this way. He was 65. Parcells, that 2006 example I gave you, he was 62. It's like our dads are in our 70s, right?

They're not throwing 100 miles an hour anymore, our dads. How old's your dad? He's 82. But but listen this is nonsense because you know some guys get a break right brady bray well that's maybe not a good example after today but brady shouldn't be in the league last year or the year before the year before that you almost have to add 10 years to brady's longevity and belichick's longevity and okay i added the 10 years now he's's going to be 70 next year. Okay.

But he's not going out on this note. He's going to win two of the next three and you're going to fall just short of making the playoffs, right? I would much rather see him retire. Right now? After that play? No, after the season.

Then watch this for four more years because the thing about this Patriots season, this is not a Patriots team. This is a team that fucks up every quarter over and over and over again. Delay of games, stupid penalties, dumb decisions, bad game management. They never would have blown a game like this 10 years ago. And at some point, look, I don't really blame him as much as the coaching staff he's assembled. There's no coach on that coaching staff that's getting poached. None. Zero. So he's getting older and then he doesn't have that reservoir

of these awesome guys who someday they're going to be Brian Flores or McDaniels or whoever. And the team is just sloppy. They're disjointed. Their offense sucks. They do dumb shit game after game. And I tweeted today, the announcer at one point was like, man, it's hard to get

used to seeing this from the Patriots. And it's like, it's actually really easy to get used to it. I've been watching it for over three months now. It's a really sloppy team. And that goes to the coach. If this was a normal coach, any other person, we'd be like, man, like Ron Rivera today. Washington was terribly coached today. It was like, oh yeah, of course, it's Ron Rivera.

Belichick's the greatest coach of all time. I just, I don't want to see him go out like this, Sal. All right. But because he's the greatest coach of all time, he probably feels he should have the most wins out of any coach ever, right? So he's 20 behind Shula. And so, all right, even if he doesn't think

that they can win a Super Bowl, the Patriots, I think he thinks he could scratch together seven wins a year for the next three years, right? And that puts him over. I bet that means a ton to him. Sal, this is the greatest coach of all time. This isn't how it's supposed to end. People still say it's Shula. And by the way, I think you're right.

Most guys aren't going to be coaching at 75 anymore. And so that if he gets this 348 wins, that's almost insurmountable at this point. I just find it hard to believe having studied this guy and watched him and followed him and read the different books and watched the documentaries about him and all this stuff. He cares so much about his place in history that I don't see him doing the thing where he just... First of all, this is year three now of depressing whatever. Brady's last year. The Cam Newton...

Actually, it's year four. Brady's last year, that was awful, even though they made the playoffs. The Cam Newton year. Last year, they got annihilated in the playoffs. And then this year, they're not even going to make the playoffs. That's four years now now that's a presidential term I'm sorry

this is what a lot of teams and a lot of fan bases go through I'm sorry Bill you gotta lose I'm just looking at him historically why would he want to keep doing this he's going to go 9-8 then next year he'll go 7-10 it's like oh now I'm 14 away

you're the greatest coach ever go out on a high note go nine and eight. Then next year he'll go seven and 10. It's like, Oh, now I'm 14 away. Like you're the greatest coach ever. Go out, go out on a high note. This is not a high note. It's going to piss you off. If he gets that record with the Texans, you will, you know, you're going to be upset. Although that'll probably take like nine years, but you know, that'll upset you. I think there's a chance this could be his last year with the Patriots because I don't think Kraft is up for this. Interesting. And I don't know what's going on with those guys,

but Wickersham's done some awesome reporting on this that I doubted at first and he was right. But the Brady piece of this and how that got screwed up and then you watch this team. The Patricia thing is the most inexplicable thing in the history of the Belichick era. The fact that they have this guy who has no business as an offensive coordinator calling the fucking plays week after week, and he's awful every week.

Everybody's worse. There's not one person who's in a better spot because Matt Patricia is the offensive coordinator. It's like our cousin Jimmy. If he just made fucking Guillermo the head writer, and he'd be like, oh yeah, Guillermo knows everybody and Jimmy's comfortable with him

and then the show goes in the fucking tank. After a while, we'd be like, man, maybe Guillermo shouldn't be the head writer. Right. But it's not in the tank. You still can make the playoffs. Guillermo should host the Oscars. I think that's what you're saying.

Well, the Pats are a game behind the Chargers. Chargers have Indianapolis next week, the Rams at Denver. To me, the Chargers are in. I thought the game they won today was huge. They're 8-6. They'll probably get to 11-6. Miami's got Green Bay at New England and the Jets.

And then Baltimore is the interesting one because they looked like crap on Saturday. They're playing home Atlanta home Pittsburgh at Cincinnati by the way I have more bad news for you Kyle forgot to turn on the TikTok camera that was all for nothing

that whole thing was for nothing good going Kyle I think you're right the Ravens are 7-7 they're playing Jacksonville at Seattle at Miami yeah they have to get someone Baltimore that resembles a quarterback I think you're right. The Ravens are 7-7. They're playing Jacksonville at Seattle at Miami. Yeah, they have to get someone, Baltimore, that resembles a quarterback who can move the ball. And if he's not back by Christmas Eve,

they're home, right? Who do they play? They have a winnable game. Oh, they're home against Atlanta next week. Otherwise, they're going to be... I have to say, if I could bet right now, I think the AFC ends up exactly as it is right now. One through seven. I think not even the teams.

I think the rankings and the seeds and everything are exactly as they are now. So you're saying even the actual seeds are exactly the same? Yeah. I don't agree. I don't think Baltimore is going to be there. Really? You don't think they stay at five? I think they drop because

I think they lose one of the next two and they lose that at-Cincy game. Cincy's at a whole different class than them. Don't you think? Cincy's got my stupid team next week in New England. Home Buffalo. Home

Baltimore. I think out of those three out of the top three Buffalo, Kansas City, Cincinnati they're only getting back I like the way Cincy's playing the most and I don't even think that's a hot take no they're going to win that division I don't know why we didn't jump on it

it was minus 120 last week they win the AFC North now it's up to minus 195 we blew it scared of it failing in Jacoby. So in the AFC, if the playoffs ended today, we get Buffalo Phillies,

the buys. We would have Chiefs Chargers as the 2-7. That is a tough beat for the Chiefs. Dangerous. If you can't get the one, you might want the 3-seed. Cincy Miami would

be the 3-6. And then, right now, the 4-5 is the shakiest of all shakiest pizza games I think we've ever had. Tennessee-Baltimore. Yeah. Just cue that up for Saturday at 1 o'clock ET

and then in the in the NFC so it would be Minnesota versus Washington San Francisco Giants Tampa Dallas and you just hit the lottery with freaking Tampa

I keep saying it but you know what's going to happen. That's when he comes alive. I love Romo, but I want them to strangle him. He's like, I saw some things out of Brady. I'm telling you.

I'm telling you. I was like, this was a terrible Bucs loss. What did you see out of Brady? It was horrible. He says the same stuff to me. He's like, you don't want to play him a second time.

I've not watched a lot of the Bucs because I've been really betting against them almost every week. They completely tried to Jedi mind trick since seeing that first half. They were doing a ton of play action. Tampa's whole thing is we're the most predictable offense that's ever existed.

We're running first down, short pass, second down, and then out pass in third. And they play action, play action, play action. And since he was kind of, since he had an interception, but then in the second half, they just, it was an absolute demolition. And Brady was turning the ball over, but I

mean, since he's so much better than Tampa Bay, it wasn't even close. It was like news traveled slow. They got news that the Falcons and Panthers lost in the early games like an hour and a half late. Like, hey, we could fumble. Yeah, we could fumble every possession now. We're good. Since he's way better. So we have

this really interesting situation in the two South divisions. The NFC South is 21 and 35 combined. If you take out all the division games, they're 12 and 26 against the rest of the league. Wow.

So you're like, man, that's terrible. Well, let me introduce you to the AFC South. They're 18, 36, and two combined, and outside of the division, they're 11 and 29. And if you take the two Souths together, they're 23 and 55, not playing their own divisions. So over and over again,

these situations where they play outside the division and we're treating them like, you know, like Tampa-Cincinnati, that line was three and a half. But really, that line probably should have been like six or seven in retrospect. But if you look at the Tennessee as a four seed is going to luck out if they play the Ravens.

Aren't the Ravens the least scary team you would want to play? It's coming to you. They seem the most broken. You don't want to play the Chargers, right? You don't want to play. Wait, who's the sixth? So Miami would be the sixth seed right now. I wouldn't want to play the Chargers or Miami before Baltimore.

And then the Tennessee just can keep losing. It's weird. I thought that was kind of a good loss for Miami. They showed me some cold weather stuff that I didn't think they had. Tua is who he is. I think every guy in the Bills secondary touched a pass that Tua threw. But for some reason, he's like interception proof. He's got like

I don't know, Crisco oil on the footballs. They just seem to hit guys' hands, go through hands. Guys will collide into each other. But for the most part, I thought they hung in that game. They had a lot of speed. That was such a fun game. Oh my god. So great. Let's go to Saturday.

So we had that Minnesota game, which I never stopped watching because I think Indianapolis stinks. At the same time, it seemed like Minnesota was going to come all the way back and then blow it anyway, but somehow they didn't. The odds were 90-1.

90-1 was the highest. It seems light and then you see teams up 30 or more points are 1,458 and one all time. I'm like, so shouldn't the odds be 1,458 to one, not 90 to one? I know that the idea is to screw the gambler with anything but true odds, but I knew 90 seemed a little light, but go ahead. What are we going to say about Nate Burleson? I think I know what you're going to say about Nate Burleson. Well, first of all, somebody needs to tell Nate.

I like Nate Burleson, but somebody needs to tell him don't talk when the play-by-play guy's talking. He thinks he's on the couch. He's like, oh! He's just making it for Ian Eagle's son, which is like, can I call the game? I got this huge assignment. But Nate Burleson at one point is like, this would be the greatest football comeback I've ever seen.

And it's like, Nate, this would be the greatest football comeback anyone's ever seen. This is the new record. But he said it like three different times. It's like, I've never seen anything like this. Like, no, no, none of us have. I love Nate. But he also said when they fake punted Minnesota on fourth and one and the punter threw the ball to a well-covered receiver and it was knocked away.

And he's like, I like the call. I don't know. You texted me that. I was dying. I like the call. It's like you like the call with the putter, putter overthrew a covered guy on fourth and one. What'd you like about it?

I was, you know, I was all set with the Saturday. Can't be beat on Saturday, you know? And, um, but I don't even know what the deal is here. Like some people we know in the industry and football, like people would respect, like think the Colts need to tank. And that's not the kind of game you want to lose, right? That you're up 30, but is he going to be, if he wins that game, does he get the job?

Does he keep the job? I don't even know where he stands in the organization anymore. Well, he stands that he'll be back on first take and get up in about five weeks. Now he's got to go. That was awful. That game was great. And then the snow

game. God damn, the Buffalo snowballs. Just checked all the boxes. Josh Allen did a couple of Josh Allen things. But I thought Miami, I thought they hung with them. If I'm Miami, I come out of that game and I'm at least encouraged that I feel like I can hang with that team. Then you look at KC who, once again,

they're eking their way out against these teams that kind of suck, right? They don't want to care. They don't want to cover. They don't want to cover. The Chiefs and the Bills just have no care in the world to cover a spread. The Chiefs, Bills was what? Seven out of eight or something? They haven't. Is that what it is?

I think it's seven out of eight they haven't covered. By the way, next time you have, what's his name? Sharp. Iron Mike Sharp on Warren Sharp. Yeah. Teasers are great. You let him know teasers are great. We had the teaser. Iron Mike Sharp on Warren Sharp. Teasers are great. You let him know teasers are great. We had the teaser. We had Buffalo on the teaser. We didn't have to

worry if Singletary gave himself up at the two-yard line. We won. We paired it with another team that won but didn't cover, like the Chiefs. In real life, I did teasers galore this weekend. You did? I had a four-team, I think six and a half pointer

that was like two to one, but it was the Bills because I was trying to do stuff with the Bills and the Eagles. And then I was like, oh, who else can I put? So it was like, oh, the Bengals. I can get them to throw.

It was a seven pointer. I'll take the Bengals to three and a half and they'll take the Pats to eight and a half. Oh, there's three teams that didn't cover normally covered on the teaser. It's great. And then the Giants were another one that seemed like they might not potentially cover.

And then there was one other one too. The Jets probably, right? Yeah. And the Jets Lions, either way. Whatever way you went with that one was good. And then the Falcons was another one, but I guess they covered in real life. But the Bengals were my favorite, trying to get them the plus three and a half.

So a couple other ones. The Eagles, I was a little worried about our Hertz MVP. We were all over that. And then all of a sudden- Which we stepped in on. He was awful. His 37 fantasy points to end it. Now I think there's three games left.

It's kind of hard to think what would have to happen for him to blow the MVP at this point. He'd have to throw four picks to you next week. What does that game even mean? He could even sit that game. He's minus 150. Still worth it to jump on it.

We jumped on it a week ago. Was it minus 150 when we jumped on it last week? No, we got it at minus 130. Less? Okay. Yeah, it at minus 130. Less, okay. Yeah, I'm with you. Yeah, I mean, they're at Dallas, home New Orleans, home Giants. I mean, none of those games are like walks in the park. New Orleans' defense, I don't know what to make of them because sometimes they look like the 85 Bears.

And then in the second half, the Falcons were running all over them. I thought the Falcons could have won that game. Ritter was bad. Yeah, I mean, if the 85 Bears played a quarterback who was making his NFL debut on the road every week. But yeah,

they were winning pretty handily. Ritter, he had a pick six that the guy dropped that was just in the red zone was awful the guy the D back was running toward the end zone and forgot to bring the ball he threw a pick at the beginning of the second half that they overturned

and then he started the game with a pick but he I thought he was pretty shaky but it was his first game he's playing in New Orleans or whatever but I like that Atlanta running attack yeah I do think that's a hard team to play is playing in New Orleans or whatever. But I like that Atlanta running attack. Yeah. I do think that's a hard team to play.

So Philly has to play them at some point. It does feel like Philly is going to lose one of these games. I think they end up at 15-2. 15's still enough for him. 15-2 is a lot. Yeah, that's great. But then the other thing is, can San Francisco pass Minnesota? Because you just want to get the two. So you have that round two game.

You can control that in San Francisco versus going to Minnesota. I don't want to go to Minnesota. Yeah, there's no Chargers coming in as a seven in the NFC, right? So yeah, you definitely want the two in the NFC. It was looking like they were going to get it. The Vikings were so, so bad. I'm like, oh, the 49ers are going to jump them. The Vikings... I mean, the Simmons, I'm so nervous because they're like six teams I'm dying to bet

against in the playoffs. And you know what that means. We're going to lose a lot of money. 100% agree. Tampa leading the list. I think the Giants are a hard team to play just for one game. I don't think they're that talented, but they know who they are. I think Dimes is

you know, he's just he'll get some third downs. And Barkley, that was the first time he's looked good in a month. And then Thibodeau is a fucking monster. Mm-hmm. Yep. Oh, and I really like that Richie James. I gotta tell you,

the pixie dust is wearing off on Tyler Heineke right now. Well, hey, poor Brian Robinson for the rest of his life when he's doing a game, their announcers are going to talk about who got shot in a car jacket. Got shot in the knee. Now, how do you get shot in the knee? Where's the meaty part of the knee that you can get shot on, not hit a bone or a ligament or anything? Right through, right through, Mike. It just went

right through. And then Mike called Melissa Stark Michelle today, which I was like absolutely delighted by. Where is Michelle? What happened to her? If anyone needs to know that if the season is too long, yeah, Mike called Melissa Michelle. We're about two

and a half games too long. Also, Greg Gumbel, and I'm not kidding, called Mitch Trubisky, Darnold like five or six times during a half-hour stretch. They must have been screaming in his ear. He finally stopped. He didn't know who was who between Darnold and Trubisky. But Greg Gumbel

is another secretly old guy. He's like Belichick. I think he's like 75. Oh, I know. Old Gumbel. Yeah. They're both old. Yeah, so I think the big like 75. Oh, I know. Both come. Yeah. Yeah. They're both old. Yeah. So I think the big things left to watch. Can Tampa hold on the NFC South at six and eight? They're at Arizona next week.

And Arizona is a dumpster fire. Carolina. And then at Atlanta. I mean, that could be seven and 10. Have we had a seven and a seven win division champ before? I don't think so. Right. We must have had a seven and nine team.

Seven and nine. Yeah. We've had a seven and nine. Right. Seven, a 10 loss team. I have a bunch of saints fan friends that just like text me the, the name,

uh, Mark Ingram. They're so mad. If he goes out of bounds there, they win that game. Or if he stays inbound, sorry, that's the first down. Oh, right. They'd be leading the, they win that game. Or if he stays inbounds, sorry, gets the first down.

Oh, right. They'd be leading the, they'd be in the division, right? I mean, they'd be leading. Yeah.

And then in the, um, in the AFC South, Tennessee seven and seven home Houston, who's super frisky for reasons that were being on queer right now, your team. And then at Jacksonville. So Jacksonville is a game behind.

They have at the Jets Thursday night. We'll talk about that in a second. At Houston, Tennessee. So the most fun scenario there is that they could just be within a game or there's some sort of stakes for that week 18. But I guess my question is, would that be the Sunday flex game? Would they do Jacksonville, Tennessee if that was the title? They probably have to find a better game, right?

Cleveland, Baltimore almost has to mean something, no? Sorry, Cincinnati, Baltimore. Right. Is that a week 18? Unless since he's... If they're two games up, it's not going to mean anything, though. Since he's... Then they can't have two seed or three.

Yeah. Yeah. Right. Tennessee, Jacksonville. Trevor Lawrence. Oh, my. Trevor Lawrence. Tennessee, Jacksonville. Trevor Lawrence. Oh my, Trevor Lawrence. Oh my God. It's funny. You want to

flex into the Sunday night, Tennessee and it's almost definitely going to be the Shakey's game the next week, like six days later. Right? Well, you know what else was crazy we didn't talk about was we had the soccer game we woke up to today, which was probably the greatest World Cup final ever. So yesterday we have the greatest NFL comeback ever Can you imagine? I will go to Qatar myself. He must have been nuts.

And then we had really good games on both sides and then the Sunday night game was pretty good too. Pretty good weekend. We're spoiled. We're spoiled as fans, except our team suffered walk-off losses probably for the first time together since we've done this. Have we had walk-off losses?

Defensive walk-off losses? Defensive walk-off losses? Defensive walk-off losses, I would say no. I'm surprised you think Belichick's going to stay around for this for four more years. I think that record means everything to him. I really do. Why else? He doesn't think he's going to win the Super Bowl with this team.

I guess the worst case there is he leaves and he goes to like the Houston Texans. And then we get stuck with co-head coaches, Matt Patricia and Joe judge. That's when I might stop, stop watching football. Let me ask you this.

You seem to be in his head. If he could have any quarterback right now and think about it, who would check? Yeah. Who would he, who would he pick? Now you don't want to say my homes because then it's not Belichick doing it. Belichick? Yeah. Who would he pick? Now, you don't want to say Mahomes because then it's not Belichick doing it, right?

You don't want to say Brady because he doesn't get credit for that either. I would say probably Herbert because Herbert's technically so brilliant. Herbert's good. Herbert or Burrow, probably one of those two. That's the right answer. So could it be the Chargers?

Well, the thing is, Brandon Staley's probably kept his job with some of these wins he's had. Yeah. Because I think that was the Sean Payton team, potentially. I've come to the realization that Mac Jones probably isn't a starting QB. I know you like him more than I do. I don't know, man.

We just see a lot of junk every week. So he doesn't have to be top 20 to be a starting QB. You know what I mean? He was so bad today. Pretty muddy. Yeah. He overthrew at least six guys today. Can't really move. Can't tackle. Does dumb shit around the red zone.

I cannot tackle. Alright, we're gonna take a break. We'll do Guess the Lines. Alright, so Guess the Lines this week is the single weirdest week since we've started doing this in 2007. We have games Thursday night, all day Christmas Eve on Saturday. We have a Saturday night game. We have three Sunday games, including a Sunday night game. And we have a Monday night game. And I don't ever remember them doing this before. I don't ever remember four days of games in five

days like this. So because we're so dedicated and paid so damn well, we're going to be doing a podcast Christmas Day night, right? We're doing a Sunday night podcast on Christmas. The good news is

the Christmas games are Dolphins Packers, Rams Broncos, and Bucks Cardinals. So we can really tape that podcast whenever on Sunday. That's true. You're right. Maybe as we're opening gifts, we could tape those. Yeah, they got super aggro and they decided they were going to go head-to-head with the NBA in a big-ass way. And they stacked the schedule with the Superbowl champs against Russell Wilson with Aaron Rogers against the dolphins.

And then Tom Brady against Kyler Murray. And it did not work. No. And I, and they can't flex it either. I mean, if they were smart, they would flex at least one of these,

but I don't think they can. I don't think they could do it by now. So what does that look like? It's McSorley. McSorley. McSorley, Baker, if he doesn't get hurt tomorrow.

And who's Denver? Rippon? Yeah, the Rams Broncos is Mayfield versus Rippon. Yeah. And then Bucks cards is Zombie Brady versus McSorley. Yeah. And then you got Zombie Rogers against Tua. Interesting.

Who, by the way, if they lose tomorrow night, Rogers might just be like, I'll see you guys later. Yeah, you're right. That could be Jordan Love time. Alright, we'll start. What are the records? I don't know. We should just go right into it.

7-4-4, you have the lead. 7-4-4. The Thursday night game. You like this more than I do. I do. 7-4-4. The Thursday night game... You like this more than I do. I do. Jets-Jags. I think this is a really good game.

I like watching the Jets. I think they're done, though. I mean, I think what, Kornacki had them at 30%, 25%? I forgot what it was. Yeah, but that's factoring in, like Baltimore, you know, getting people back.

I think it's factoring in they have to win probably three games with any Zach Wilson, Mike White combination. And by the way, people went a little crazy with Mike White. Like, oh, if he has busted ribs, he should still start that game. It's like, it's Mike White with busted ribs. Zach Wilson was, he was the quarterback of the future a few weeks ago before he had a terrible game and then mouthed off at the press conference. Like, calm down. Mike White has broken broken ribs he was saying that at mike white are you talking about like just random everybody oh i'm not if mike white if he's not i'm not betting the jets here if mike white's not playing it's like well he has broken he went to 10 doctors that's

not an exaggeration 10 doctors wouldn't clear him for this i I immediately bet the Lions in real life after it was announced Zach Wilson was the starter. Because I think Zach Wilson is terrible. See? You're one of them. You're the same person. Well, he was terrible in this game, but he did this thing today where he just threw the ball

kind of up for grabs, maybe four times and three times the Jets caught it. And it got to the point where you're like, wow, are they going to actually win this game with Zach Wilson? But somehow the Lions held on. But the Quinton Williams going out, I think was an even bigger thing because I thought the defense maybe could have stopped Goff.

I don't know if they're getting either of those guys. So Mike White probably doesn't play in this Thursday night game. Right. They said he's probably not ready. Yep. Wilson's tough. You can tell the team doesn't really like him. I don't know.

It's a pretty good team. I think out of all the seven and seven kind of range teams, I think they're probably the most talented. Well, I hope Zonovan Knight has a big game for you, whatever the hell his name is. Is it 11 for 23 today? Zonovan Knight has a big game for you, whatever the hell his name is. Is it 11 for 23 today, Zonovan Knight? Yeah. What was your quick 30-second report card of the Jags?

I don't know. I mean, Trevor Lawrence's hair is beautiful in the sun. I mean, I don't know if you saw it. It was very shady most of the times they lined up. Now, I don't understand how some of these average players are just excelling. They're putting up numbers like we haven't seen before. And

you better cut Lawrence's head off early. Otherwise, he's one of those quarterbacks that think that'll come back. I wasn't that impressed with their defense. Dak, I was just really down on the Cowboys that game. But, I mean, this is now, I don't know, he's like thrown like 78% now, Lawrence, over the last six games.

So you can't count them out by any means. It seems like they have guys open the last couple weeks, that guys open deep over and over again. I don't know how they're pulling that off because it's people like Zay Jones. Yeah, Zay Jones. Where's he coming from? So I have the Jets as a slight, slight favorite at home against the Jags. I went

Jets minus one, but I got to say, I had a lot of trouble this week just trying to figure some of these out. This one, you could tell me I'm four points off either way. I would believe it. So I got Jets minus one. Well, I screwed up. You screwed up too, but I screwed up worse. I said Jets minus two, and it's Jacksonville minus one and a half.

So you get it. Off by two and a half. That's a tough one. I didn't feel good about that one. I don't know if that's as easy as if Zach Wilson starts, I'm going with Trevor Lawrence. I don't know. I just don't want...

You love these teal teams. You love these crappy teal South teams. If the Jacksonville or Carolina doesn't make the playoffs, I don't know what you're going to do to yourself. I know. I do love the teal. I'll tell you this. I finally stayed away from a Thursday night game this week

with the Niners Seahawks. I love the Niners. And I'm like, you know what? These games are too wonky I'm tired of getting burned it's short rest these guys don't have time to prepare people get injured last second it's always weird disjointed I'm out and then the Niners like killed the Seahawks and I was like oh my god the one week I stayed away it was the most aggravating game you didn't bet because you went against Kittle.

Right, and you had Kittle. So I'm going to also stay away from this Jags-Jets game. I don't trust this Jags team at all. But if Zach Wilson's the quarterback, it's going to be really hard not to bet the Jags. Really, really, really, really hard because he's bad. And every Jets fan I know like despises him. Like just like who's your least favorite

Cowboys quarterback ever? Mine was Tony Eason for the Pats. Well, now it's Ryan Leaf since he waged war on me. But yeah, I think let's see. Jason Garrett.

Jason Garrett. Across the board. Oh, we got a Saturday marquee game. Yeah. Eagles at Dallas. Mm-hmm. I wouldn't say this is a must-win for you, Sal. As weird as that sounds.

You're kind of locked into the five-state. Who's going to catch you? What's going to happen? Yeah, no one should get hurt. Just don't get hurt. It's a don't-get-hurt game. Kind of for everybody one should get hurt. Just don't get hurt. It's a don't get hurt game. Kind of for everybody. Mm-hmm.

I have the Eagles favored by two and a half. You are... Wait a minute. Where is this? I had... Wait a minute. I'm sorry.

I had Dallas one and a half and it's... Sorry, I had Eagles one and a half. It's Dallas one and a half. Who gets it? Oh, Jesus. You get it. 1.5. Who gets it? Oh, Jesus, you get it. Okay.

Sorry. Cowboys are favored in this game? Cowboys are favored by 1.5. Yeah, it shouldn't make any sense. Understand that at all. Are they just saying the Eagles don't care? The Eagles are better than you. They are better.

I mean, this does say that they're better. We would have been a three-point right with the Dallas tax and everything. True. They're usually a four-point favorite. Eagles indoors? That team's so fast. Eagles looking tasty. We stayed with them with Cooper Rush. Saturday, three

watchables. Chiefs Seahawks. Putting that on there only because the Seahawks seem to be in fun games. And I guess we're going to find out this Chiefs team. It's in KC though. And I think this has to get close to 10, but not totally.

I'm going to say Chiefs 9. I said 8.5. You beat me. It's 10. It is actually 10. Ooh, that's too high. Well, not if we tease it to nothing. Well, I wonder like because the teasers were hitting the last couple weeks, I wonder if they're going to jack these up

a little bit because we've seen that happen sometimes. Well, look how bad Kansas City was today and they still won by what? Six, right? Right. The extra point? Seven. Yeah. Six. This one's good. Vikings are home against the Giants. And I have

this in the Vegas zone. I have the Vikings by four and a half. Good call. I thought it was three. Vegas screws with these teams, both these teams line-wise. We saw the Giants were a big underdog. Vikings line was really screwy all week. It's four, so you get it. I said three.

I was basing that guess off of last week where the Colts were only four and So you get it. I said three. I was basing that guess off of last week where the Colts were only four and a half point dogs. It went down to three and a half. The biggest thing to respect them at all. The kickoff. It's crazy. They don't respect them.

The other one I have for watchable is Niners-Washington. Just because it's weird. Washington doesn't score a lot of points, but I do kind of enjoy watching them. And they also, they always have dumb coach stuff going on. And I don't know. They're oddly compelling.

It's in San Francisco. San Francisco is edging toward. We don't need any of these games. Territory. So I have the Niners by six and a half. Oh, come on. What is it?

I said six at seven and a half. Ooh. That you want to tease. You want to said six. It's seven and a half. Ooh. That you want to tease. You want to tease that. That's a tease. Yeah. December. Tease month.

Yep. Brian Robinson, 11 yards rushing that game. Brian Robinson, eight yards of carry. Kick it out of the field during the final draft. Just keep them off. Let's keep Gibson out there. You're a watchable. Are you not counting Cincinnati, New England as a watchable?

No. That's a watchable. Oh. I wrote that in the wrong spot. You're right. It is a watchable. Yeah. Want to do that now?

Sure. Cincinnati at New England. I think the Bengals have to be favored after the disastrous day today that we had. And I'm going to say Bengals by two and a half. All right. I got this exactly. It's three and a half.

Oh, Jesus. So is that what, so you're considered the same as the, ironically, you're considered the same as Tampa Bay's Buccaneers because weren't they three and a half? Yes.

It's not, it's not terrible since the A's seem to just be getting better and better. Yeah, this, this is not going to be a good game for us. Hmm. I don't see us putting up a lot of points.

I wonder if the Bengals will be ready for all of our screen passes and delayed it's a delayed handoff and then Mack whirls around and throws it to Johnny Smith for two yards I wonder if they'll be ready for all this well get more than that you got to get after him that's the one thing the Bucks was doing

the defense was right they sacked Burrow remember his fingers pinky was messed up like I was even going to make it through to the finish line here. That game could have been even worse because Chase dropped a couple. Chase had a couple long ones that one hit it like his

helmet that he usually catches. Another one on the sidelines. Saturday, fairly watchable. Bills at Bears. The Bears just have a way of hanging around against these teams and fields will do two things that are just incredible. That run was amazing. That would have been the best quarterback run we ever saw

if he didn't step out at the seven. They should have given it to him. Yeah, that was awesome. I'm basing this off the line for the Eagles game. I'm going to say Bills by seven and a half because they're not as good as the Eagles. I got it here. I got it eight exactly.

Stealing that one from you. That's a tease. Yeah, because Buffalo still needs to win here. Also, if you're the Bears. The Bears are so good, I think, in my eyes. I think they can play with almost anybody, right? They only have three wins. If the Texans weren't so

stupid, the Bears would be vying for the number one pick here. Well, think about they also traded, who'd they trade? They traded Roquan Smith and they traded one other guy, right? They traded two of their defenders that were two of their best defensive players. And they traded one other guy, right? They traded two of their defenders that were two of their best defensive players.

And they're still hanging in these games. Then they took Claypool on, but it hasn't done anything. But yeah, they were weird this year. Claypool has definitely become one of those guys. It just doesn't seem like he's going to make it. These guys, like basketball has these guys too that you think they're good,

but they've never actually done anything. And then all of a sudden they're like 29 years old. It's just never happening for you. Sorry you were sentenced to that miserable time with Ben Roethlisberger as your quarterback. Maybe we sure you could branch out somewhere else and

Juju Schuster and Claypool. All these guys can't do it. Yeah, he goes from washed up Ben to like Trubisky Rudolph, all those dudes. And now Justin Fields who can't complete passes either. Yeah. He's got to be watched like Herbert Burrow on a Sunday night. Just like,

Oh my God. Look at that. 20 yarder caught the guy in stride. Next one's lions, Panthers. I'm finally going to stop betting on the Panthers. Really? Yeah. You know what sucks about

betting on the Panthers? And I actually think they're out of the bad teams, they're one of the better ones. But if they fall behind by like seven, the game's over. It's over? Where it's like Sam Darnold at 17-7. It's like, this is insurmountable. What are they going to do? They have Sam Darnold. Is it Sam Darnold. It's 17-7. It's like this is insurmountable. What are they going to do? They have Sam Darnold.

Is it Sam Darnold or Trubisky? Whoever it is. He's 76, Greg Gumbel. 76. He felt it today as he kept getting the quarterbacks on either team confused. I have the Lions in Carolina favored by two and a half.

It's a smart pick. I said only one, and it's three. People must just be betting lines like crazy because they start off the week with a very healthy line, very favorable line every week for a 7-17. They've been pretty reliable. It's so funny. Dan Campbell, he just can't help himself.

They kind of win despite him with some of the decisions. Nobody in the league is more prone when you have the lead and it's like, should we kick the 56-yard field goal and we're up three? And if we miss it, the other team's going to get the ball in the 40. And most coaches go, no, actually, let's punt and we'll make Zach Wilson

go 80 yards for the tying field goal. And Dan Campbell looks at it and he's like, nah, I think we can make this field goal, man. Yeah. This is my ball. Yeah. Touch my ball. Yeah. Let's get aggressive. That's it. That 4-1 call was pretty great to the tight end.

Oh my God. They've had a couple really good 4-1 plays the last couple weeks, but that's the thing.-1 call was pretty great to the tight end oh my god they've had a couple really good 4-1 plays the last couple weeks but they'll that's the thing he just he'll have three weird ones the other fairly watchable

I got is Ravens Falcons only assuming Lamar's coming back if he's not coming back this is a poop fuck the game I have

Ravens by 5.5 oh man stop this already. I had five. What is it? It's seven. Seven? Yep.

Jesus. Six to three. It's seven when we don't even know who the Ravens quarterback is? Let me make sure. This is benefiting me. No, I'm just surprised it's that high. That's more of an indictment of the Falcons. I mean, they've been saying he's coming back Christmas Eve for a while, right?

Well, you know what? That ties into that Lions-Panthers game and that Ravens-Falcons game. It ties into that thing I read you before about the NFC South 12 and 26 outside the division, right? Yeah. Someone's paying attention to that, I guess. Yeah.

Right. Saturday, Poop Fecta. Brown Saints. This is Saturday poopfecta. Brown Saints. This is a poopy game. I love Deshaun Watson holding on to the game ball after that Saturday garbage. I mean, really, they're the only home team that covered, right? And they barely scored.

And he's like yeah I did it man this is a special game I'm holding on to this ball threw for 166 yards he looks terrible yep you have Chubb

so I'm sure you were watching a lot of that game yeah that sucked the Ravens were just loading up on Chubb daring Watson who the Browns gave 250 million dollars three first round picks daring him to beat them up on Chubb. Daring Watson, who the Browns gave $250 million.

Three first-round picks. Daring him to beat them. I have the Browns favored by three over the Saints. I can't beat you. I said four. I thought it should be a little higher. It is three. So you think they're even? And then they just gave them the home field. you think they're even and then

they just gave them the home field. I think they're dead even. Kind of like the Saints for underdog parlay though. Alright. Last one. Titans Texans in Tennessee. Tannehill looked like he was out for the year and then all of a sudden he was back. I had a smaller TV. I don't know.

Something carted off. Malik Hooker was running around like a drunk guy for 10 minutes. Is that his name? What's his name? Malik Willis. Malik Willis. Who's Malik Hooker? Malik Hooker's the safety.

Yeah. I feel like Greg Gumbel. Malik Willis was just kind of running around doing nothing. And then Al Santana was back. Yeah. And they need him back. Almost won the game. Yeah.

They need him, I think, to hold on to this division and then lose in the Shakey's game. This is one of the ones I just... You could tell me anything. I'd believe it. I have Titans by six. I have no idea. All right, we split it.

I said eight, and it's seven. Hmm. You want to tease that? I don't. I do not. The Texans look like a playoff team the last two weeks. Jesus, Lovey Smith, five-year extension.

What's going on? Saturday night. Steelers. Raiders. Raiders, somehow not out of it. And Raiders had, they not blowing that Rams game. I guess it all evens out, right? They win the dumbest game of all time today,

but they lose the dumbest game of all time 10 days ago. So maybe it evens out. It's in Pittsburgh. Steelers, Raiders. What's the Saturday night announcing crew for this? Because we have a Saturday night game, a Sunday night game, a Monday night game. Good call.

I would think it's... Is this NFL Network? Probably an NFL Network. Oh, Nate Burleson. It might be. I might be wrong. I don't know. I like the call. Fake punt over the guy's head. Who's covered? I like the call. I have Steelers by two and a half

over the Raiders. Oh, I'm going to get one. Finally, I said two. It's one and a half. Oh. Some friskiness with the Raiders. It's tough to bet against the Steelers. It's also tough to bet on them. Really, it's both. I think I've lost the last two weeks with them. I lost at Tom Brady, the tease game when Trubisky beat them.

I feel like I've lost on the Steelers at least four times. They were the only one I lost today. I think if you watch them for a quarter and a half, you could live bet them. You figure it out. I almost knew immediately they were going to beat the Panthers. The week before, we had to see a little bit of Trubisky to see that that wasn't happening.

Against, who was it? Cleveland? I don't know. Baltimore. Yeah. Well, I watched them last week. I had them over Baltimore. And Baltimore ran the ball

down their throats and had like over 200 yards rushing and just completely dominated them. Pretty smartly felt like, oh, well, Carolina can do that. They form in and they can really run the ball. That was all my analysis. The Steelers shut them down.

They were able to run nothing. They did nothing the whole game. It's like, where was this a week ago? It's fucking J.K. Dobbins on one leg. I think we have to remember that no one's as good or as bad as they were the previous week. Yeah, it just zags the other way. You're right. Christmas Sunday.

The first of the triple header. Ooh. Hold on to your seats for these three. This is going to be tough, though. Think about this. So 10 a.m. West Coast. What's the NBA game? You're going to be wide.

We're going to get in trouble. We're actually spending a lot of time with the family. Celtics just lost to Orlando twice in three days. The Celts are falling apart. You think they'll win their play-in game? The Celts? Yeah. My dad is really starting to freak out about

Gumchoo and Joe. Our coach. He doesn't call timeouts. So you have the Lakers staging this amazing comeback. Crowd's going nuts. Joe's just chewing his gum on the sidelines,

just watching. He's like, ah, we're going to play out of this. It's like they're in a 31 to 5 run. They're not playing out of this. So I don't know. We're a little worried. We don't like the vibe right now. Did you see, by the way,

you know who's going to win the MVP? Fucking Jokic. He's going to win it again. Oh, he had a big night tonight. Yeah. A big night. He did. Only Wilt Chamberlain has done what he did today.

He had 40, 27, and 10. He had triple-double. 40 points and 27 rebounds. It's the first 35-25 since Wilt. Well, that's good. I bet six guys to win MVP, and he's not one of them. Well, I'm looking at Fandel right now. He is, he's down to 11-1.

Is he? Yeah. Tatum's odds have dropped to plus 250. Booker is now 20-1. He's kind of climbed and beats 10-1. And the one who I think is the one people should actually be looking at is Durant, who's 30-1. Really?

Well, it's anybody. And Brooklyn's record's pretty good. But he's kind of lurking all of a sudden. He was awesome today against the Pistons. I can't keep betting, guys, for MVP. I really have everybody. Back off. All right, we have Dolphins Packers in Miami Dolphins by six

for me I hit this exactly it's four and a half oh man really that's a lot of respect for the Packers I bet it's

I bet it swings I bet something weird happens tomorrow night you're right well we think the Packers beat the Rams tomorrow, right? I have the Rams. I've been a couple

tiny teases. Do you? Be careful. Just tiny ones. I was going to bet the Rams plus seven. Why should the Rams be plus two sixty five?

They're kind of even that, you know, the Packers aren't magical at home anymore. They already have three home losses. I mean, it could be I know Aaron Donald's

not in, but yeah, I get it. Well, Rams playing on Sunday. We have no idea who's going to be playing, but they're at home against the Broncos, which I'm sure for the Denver fans

was a big L.A. trip in May, June, July. We'll go to L.A. for Christmas. We'll see Russell. I have Rams pick them. This is stupid. You're going to get it. I had Rams minus two.

Denver's favored by one. Why? Why is that? Brett Rippon. What? What am I missing there? They're four and ten. They're on the road.

Awful coach. Well, I'll say this with the Broncos. Their defense, week after week, has been pretty good, right? That's true. And you think like, oh, no, they don't have Russell Wilson. Well, he's sucked all season. So is it that much of a downgrade? But they're a four-point favorite without the home.

I guess it's not. Do they anticipate having a lot of fans? All right. I'm not going to bet a big one way or another. It's funny you talk about people saving up money. Hench and I were talking about imagine the father that saves up all this money to take his kid

or the mother to the Vikings game and sees them lose 30-0. He's like, we're out of here, kid. They leave at halftime. Go in the shop. Daddy, I want to stay. I don't care what the score is. No. We're cutting to stay. I don't care what the score is. No. We're cutting our losses.

I hate car cousins. Last one is Bucks Cardinals in Arizona. Colt McCoy concussed today. Probably mixed sorely. Yeah. And if the Bucks can't win this one we might have to ban them from the playoffs I have it's either three or two and a half I

have bucks by two and a half all right I got it I said three and a half it's four oh geez okay I don't know that Brady deserves to be a favorite that I either but the mix orally is the other guy well now they're three ten and one against the spread the Bucks Wow and they cover the. Well, now they're 3-10-1 against the spread, the Bucs. Wow. And that's the worst. And they cover the first two weeks, so they're 1-10-1

the last 12 weeks, and the only one they covered wasn't in America. So they haven't covered a game in America since mid-September. That sounds right. Yeah. That sounds right. It feels that way, too. Somehow we lost on multiple ones during that streak.

The one they covered was weird weird too, wasn't it? The one in America that they covered. I can't remember. Was it the Saints? One of them was weird, yeah. I don't know. Monday night, last one. Chargers at the Colts.

Jeff Saturday against Brandon Staley. Mm-hmm. I think this is Chargers by three. Yeah, you got it exactly. I thought five. I mean, this is just lose by something. Well, I got killed. I got killed this week.

Six, nine, ten to seven. Yeah, you win. Eight, four, and four. But the Chargers should put them away. This shouldn't be a thing, right? Jeff Saturday, just don't get embarrassed. And Chargers, don't you lose this game. And let's just get to the playoffs.

Well, the thing with the Colts is they do hang around week after week, no matter who they're playing, right? You look like... There's no sense. Jonathan Taylor goes out in the first drive and still up by 30. Even your game would take loose 54-19, but wasn't

that a two-point game with like a quarter left? Yeah. Head in the fourth quarter, it's 21-19. Week before Steelers, seven points. Week before Eagles beat them by one. They beat the Raiders. The Pats were the only team that really spanked them. Lose to Washington by one.

Hang around Titans by nine. Beat the Jags. Beat the Broncos. Titans by seven, they lose. But yeah, I think that's what it is. They're always kind of hanging around. Well, what have they been outscored in the last two fourth quarters?

50-0 or 70? Oh my God, like 100,000 and nothing. Wow. How did you finish with World Cup gambling? I did all right. I took a bad beat with Messi to have the golden boot. That was the only thing I lost because I bet a South American team to win the cup.

I bet all the 0-0s first half, and I did well with that. But Messi at 11-1 to win the golden boot, he was up going into this game because they were tied on assists, and he scores a goal. So that means France has to score two goals. It's like insurmountable for you almost.

Right. Mbappe has to score both of them. And he does. But then Messi goes ahead again in the added time and then Mbappe scores again. So, but I can't complain. 11-1? I did well.

It was 11-1 Oz. I was so mad. But I did well. Did you bet it otherwise? Did you bet it? I stayed away. I wanted Messi to win and so mad. Did you bet it otherwise? Did you bet it? I stayed away. I wanted Messi to win and I didn't want to bet it because I knew I was going to root for him anyway. They lost the first game, remember?

Yeah, Saudi Arabia. They looked like crap. What were their odds after they lost to Saudi Arabia? Overall, I think it went up to... At least 30-1, right? 20-1? They were still expected to qualify even after that. Um, overall, uh, I think it went up to at least like 30 to one, right? No, no, 20 to one. No,

because they were still expected to qualify even after that. Uh, they was like close to eight or nine or something. I really, I was racking my brain

trying to think in football or basketball, have two all time greats ever actually played that well in a final game. And I was going through all the basketball seasons and I don't think it's happened. Right.

You'd have to go back to like Jerry West and Bill Russell in like the 60s basically. But other than that, like even like the 84 finals, Bird and Magic. Yeah.

They weren't awesome in the game. You know, like Curry and LeBron in 2016. Curry was terrible in that game. You go on through 2013, Duncan, LeBron. Duncan was great in the first half, but it was kind of like an older version of Duncan. LeBron was good in the second half.

Were there two great quarterbacks, I'm trying to think? No, I couldn't really come up with one. The closest was probably Elway and Favre. Yeah, Staubach and Bradshaw or something. Yeah, one of those maybe. But even Bradshaw wasn't that good in some of those games. But there's been some good like Brady Mahomes and Brady Manning and stuff like that, but never as the final game.

Right. It would be like if Jake DeLome was awesome and then you would say like, oh, Caroline and the Pats in 03 when DeLome and Brady went toe-to-toe.

It must have been probably like pitching duels when we were... Our fathers were growing up and stuff like that. The Bob Gibsons of the world. Well, what was the Jack Morris 1-0 game?

Oh, yeah. Was that against Smoltz or something? When we were in college. Yeah. Wasn't that Jack Morris against Smoltz? That was a good one. That sounds right.

But I mean, those guys weren't Messi and Mbappe. Like, Messi is, I think now, probably the best soccer player of all time. And Mbappe is going to be the guy that replaces him eight years from now as the best soccer player of all time. Did you say Russell Wilson, Brady? Oh, that's pretty good. But I mean, Russell Wilson wasn't like Mbappe.

I'm with you. No one's Mbappe. It's just fun to say. Mbappe. So there's rumors that Messi might come to Miami. Messi might come to Miami? Yeah, that's the rumor. How old is he though now?

Is he 37? 35. I think he and Greg Gumbel are the same age. All right. Let's take a break. We'll do Parent Corner. Today's Parent Corner is brought to you by CarMax. CarMax has upfront pricing and their stores are committed to a hassle-free shopping experience

so you can find the right car for you and your budget. Learn more at CarMax.com. CarMax. Car buying. Reimagined. All right. Parent corner time. What do you got?

All right. Well, listen, as you pointed out, this was a huge sports weekend, right? Started with the Vikings-Colts. That was a big, big game. Two crazy games with our teams today. The World Cup in the morning. The Jimmy Kimmel Bowl yesterday.

A lot of fun. I did bet Fresno State. That was fun. It's interesting to be at a game and bet on it and win. It really hasn't happened to me in many, many years. So with all this going on, my middle son, Jack, was only excited about a game that took place tonight featuring the Coachella Valley Firebirds. It's an AHL hockey league. They started tonight. It's a brand new franchise in Palm Springs.

Tonight, they dropped the puck at Accresure Arena, which is the same as what Pittsburgh's called. And I'm going to have to go to one of these games. I mean, he is obsessed with this Coachella Valley Firebirds. And he's texting me like during the Giants-Commanders game, all this Coachella Valley Firebirds stuff. Like, oh, they're winning 4-2. I'm like, okay, great.

And I think he's just doing it to just like needle me a little, right? He's like a little, just because he's the middle child, so he doesn't want to do what the older one does or the younger one does. But anyway, I'm going to have to take him to a Coachella Valley Firebird game in February after football ends, I promised him. And almost all his Christmas gifts are Coachella Valley Firebird related.

He's a peculiar kid. That's all I have to say. Coachella Valley Firebird. So what league are we talking about? The AHL Hockey League. I don't even know. But my friend Harry talks to him about it. And I was like, all right, stop.

Bring him to the NFL for a minute. Look at this. I'm on my computer. He was on my computer looking at the standings here for age. Yeah. It's bizarre. Are they televised? No.

He like watched them on YouTube or something. And where does the Coachella Valley team play? What is the arena in Coachella Valley? It's called the Palm Springs. Yeah. It's in Palm Springs. It's called the Akershire Arena. He has 14.

I'm on my computer, there's 14 windows pulled up and they're all Coachella Valley Firebird related. Amazing. Do they have hats? Yeah, they have everything and they're not cheap either because I have to get them for Halloween. What's this thing coming up? Christmas. Christmas. Send me some Coachella Valley Firebird stuff if you work for the team. Good Lord. I have, instead of parent corner, mine's going to be uncle corner.

We had Kyle's dad was in town and Kyle's brother was in town. And they were leaving today and we had dinner last night at my house. We're going to like the football game was on. We ordered some barbecue and Kyle's coming. Kyle shows up. Kyle had been at the frolic room for, I don't know, Kyle, feel free to pop on the zoom. If you want to join us on that, Kyle's going to pass. Kyle shows up. He's had a few. Had a fight with his fiance and has just had a few. And we're having barbecue and he's

just got this glazed look on his face and he's telling us that he got in a sub-sort of argument with his fiance but doesn't want to tell us what they argued about but they're going to make up when he gets home and was just kind of... It was quite

a night. It was our last night all together, and I'm not sure how much Kyle remembers. Kyle, how long had you been at the Frolic Room? Like seven, eight beers. I don't know. It was shots in between. I don't know. But we were playing. We were all jamming upstairs. That's what I thought you were going to talk about. Me and my dad were jamming upstairs, and I was't know. We were all jamming upstairs. That's what I thought you were going to talk about.

Me and my dad were jamming upstairs and I was the singer. Right. I was leading there. It had a fun ending. His dad who plays... He was playing guitar and Ben was playing bass and then Kyle was

singing and they were doing songs upstairs. It was like karaoke. That was one. The other one I had was a paracorner. My son was supposed to come on and do his list of his six most important people of 2022. He was all excited about it. Then the time came to do the podcast and he's at his friend Henry's he just no-showed

he no-showed Paracord, yeah he was gonna come by he's just gone, I don't know where he is at one of his friend's house we know Henry's one of his most important people on the list, so we just need five more and then the last thing is my daughter's been dating this new guy

who we hadn't met and I finally got mad who we hadn't met. And I finally got mad. No, I finally got mad because we hadn't met him. And she's very defensive all the time. She's 17 and a half defensive age. And I was like, listen, that guy's got to come over and I've got to meet him and shake his hand. And if I don't meet him before Christmas,

I'm taking your car. Wow. I was really mad. I was like, you've been dating this guy now for like five weeks. Bring his ass over and I want to meet him. Right. So anyway, he came over today. I met him, handshake.

Then I went back to the Giants game. It was great. He has no hands. She actually listened. I thought you were going to say he has no arms. Nice, good eye contact. Nice handshake. And then that was it. That's all I listened. I thought you were going to say he has no arms. Nice, good eye contact. Nice handshake. And then that was it.

That's all I need. I'm not hard. Just come in. If you're, the advice out there for the people listening, if you're dating somebody, go to their house and go meet their parents and shake their hands and just let them know that you're a normal person. That's all they need. They don't want to hang out with you for an hour and do a podcast with you.

They just want a greeting. Not too much to ask. We're not going to sit down and interrogate you. We just want to make sure you're a normal person. He doesn't want her to lose her car either. But what time did he come over? Like six o'clock. So this is right after the Patriots.

Yeah, but I wasn't that upset about the Patriots because we suck. What are we? We're going to win the Super Bowl this year? No. The team's terrible. You're getting rid of your coach now. We score 16 points a game. Not getting rid of them. I love Belichick. I don't want him to go out like this. This is terrible. You know what? I don't want to go out like this either. That was a nice story with your daughter and her boyfriend.

And you're right. I just thought it was like right when he came by was when they lost. That wouldn't have been good. Nobody loves Jay Leno more than you. What? Watching him on,

what shows is he on now? What's the word? Make a deal? You'd think I would know that as much as I love him. What's Jay Leno's game show now? To Tell the Truth? I have no idea.

Tell the Truth. Oh, is it really? Yeah, he hosts To Tell the Truth with Kevin Eubanks as his band leader. And it's like, this guy hosted the Tonight Show for 30 years. He's on the syndicated game show at 11 o'clock at night. This is terrible. I don't want Belichick to be Jay Leno hosting to tell the truth.

Oh, I forgot what we were talking. I thought you were talking about your daughter's boyfriend. Go out on top. I gotcha. Yeah. All right. Yeah, and make sure the car doesn't backfire. I would not be surprised

over the next week if some questions started to arise of how long he's going to last. Really? Yeah. He's breaking that record by you. He's doing it. Might not be with New England. Maybe he goes back to Cleveland. Wow.

No, I don't know. No, I don't know. Yeah, I don't know where it would go. He's going to be 71 next year? Mm-hmm. It's really hard to coach a football team. I know, but he's Belichick.

He's Belichick. He's wired differently. You're going to be fine. You're going to be fine. You're going to be fine. You can have a year where you don't make the playoffs. Sal, I thought we handled this podcast pretty well considering all the trauma today. It was highly anticipated. I hope we stepped it up and lived up to

everyone's expectations. I feel like there's a little more meat on the bone with you and Dak, though. I think you're genuinely disappointed now. I'm not happy about it. This guy ruined Romo's career. He was supposed to be the anointed one, and he just has not come through, and it doesn't seem like he's getting better.

Well, I'm moving. So if I rank him 1 to 10, right, and anything above 7, he's got to stay as our quarterback, and 6 and below is consider Cooper Rush. I'm at seven and a half now. I'm at seven and a half and it dipped. I didn't want to be one of those guys, but now

I'm almost there. Throw a good ball. That's it for Parent Corner. Today's Parent Corner is brought to you by CarMax. The CarMax Love Your Car Guarantee means you get to find your car on your terms with confidence. So be sure you find your favorite ride with the unraveled CarMax. The CarMax Love Your Car Guarantee means you get to find your car on your terms with confidence. So be sure you find your favorite ride with the unraveled CarMax 30-day money-back guarantee

and buy your car with peace of mind up to 1,500 miles. Learn more at CarMax.com. CarMax, car buying reimagined. Sal, what do you got to put? All right, listen, I told you about this last week. Monday, January 9th, Extra Points Live pregame at Jimmy Kimmel's Comedy Club. Buy tickets at TicketmasterinVegas.com.

They're available now. It's from 2 to 3.30, right before the College Football Championship. Then stay and watch the game with us. We're going to be giving away betting slips, and we're going to have a parlay pinata. We're going to hang Harry upside down from the ceiling, and're going to have Parley's put in his mouth and people are going to hit him with a wiffle bat and he's going to spit out Parley's. Isn't that nice? That's amazing. Is he going to have a

shirt on or no? I don't think he should, right? No, I don't think he should either. I think he should put some body butter on him and just go shirtless. Really beautiful. Parley pinata. Sounds great. All right. Good job by you, Sal. Good job by you, buddy.

All right. That's it for the podcast. Thanks to Kyle Creighton for producing as always. Thanks to Sal. And I will see you on Tuesday on This Feed and on the Rewatchables

on Monday night. I don't want to see them on the way so I never say I don't have feelings with them. I don't want to see them on the way so I never say I don't have feelings with them.