The Bill Simmons Podcast - Another Saints Collapse, a Patriots Maybe-Funeral, Bad Coaching Galore, and Round 2 Lines With Cousin Sal | The Bill Simmons Podcast

Episode Date: January 6, 2020

HBO and The Ringer's Bill Simmons is joined by Cousin Sal to recap NFL wild-card weekend, including another painful Saints postseason exit vs. the Vikings, Seahawks-Eagles, Bills-Texans, Patriots-Titans, questions surrounding the 2020 New England Patriots, and more (3:05). Then they Guess the Lines for the divisional round (1:08:20). Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Today's I'm glad this wasn't last night episode of the Bill Simmons podcast brought to you by ZipRecruiter. Finding key players for your team can be challenging. Just ask the Patriots. Would have been nice to have a deep threat this season. Cafe Autor, COO, Dylan Miskiewicz. Well, he could relate. Needed to hire a director of coffee, posted his job on ZipRecruiter,

found the best person for the role in just a few days. Four out of five employers who post on ZipRecruiter get a quality candidate through the site within the first day. Right now, my listeners can try ZipRecruiter for free at ZipRecruiter.com slash BS. ZipRecruiter is the smartest way to hire. Wanted to tell you about two pods that I have coming this week. One is the rewatchables with Quentin Tarantino,

who won a Golden Globe tonight, and Chris Ryan, the with Quentin Tarantino who won a golden globe tonight. And Chris Ryan, the second of the Tarantino trilogy on the rewatchables. We did unstoppable Tony Scott's last film. There's a lot of reasons for this. We dive into all of them on the pod. That's going up late Wednesday night.

And then the book of basketball is coming back this week. Steve Nash. We're going to be talking about game four, 2007 sun Spurs. This is probably, this is one of my top two favorite book of basketball podcast so far. That's going to be going up late Monday night. It's really good.

So there you go. Check out all this stuff on theringer.com where we broke down football, the Golden Globes, and a whole bunch of other stuff, as well as two, we had Ringer podcasts about on the Ringer Dish feed and the Big Picture feed, breaking down the Golden Globes. Nobody takes the Golden Globes seriously, but it's such a fun night. I think that's why it's fun to do content about it. But it would be the equivalent of like if the NBA had an award show and the MVP went to like Bogdan Bogdanovich

and he'd be like, oh, that's cool. I'm happy for Bogdan. The Golden Globes are drunk, but it's always a fun night. It's fun to see all the stars together. So there you go. Coming up, Cousin Sal and I are going to break down round one of the NFL playoffs and play a guest line for round two, as well as an epic parent corner.

But first, our friends from Pearl Jam. All right, Cousin Sal's on the line. Neither of us won a Golden Globe tonight. It's too bad. Rocket Man, we're taping this. It's like 7 o'clock on Sunday night West Coast time Rocket Man

somehow has two Golden Globes they have two? yeah even my even my son didn't like Rocket Man he's basically the target audience

so we have a big football weekend to discuss I don't want to start with the Pats let's just talk about Rocket Man I'd rather just talk

about Rocket Man let's start with Saints Vikings let's go there alright I can see why Man. Let's start with Saints-Vikings. Let's go there. I could see why you'd want to start with that. Yeah, let's go there. Two other games. That blew up a lot of parlays. It blew up a lot of

teases. It blew up the playoff picture. It made the path for the 49ers suddenly look a hell of a lot easier. Did you do the Niners? I did the Niners 4-1 right before lot easier. Did you do the Niners? I did the Niners 4-1 right before the playoffs. Did you do that or no? I did Niners Chiefs for Super Bowl.

But Saints was the biggest favorite. And like you said, a lot of people had it on a teaser or Moneyline Parlay, including me. Let's start here. The Saints have had five really, really dumbfounding, terrible playoff losses this decade since they won the Super Bowl. But the irony is they won the Super Bowl. So Breeze and Peyton, they kind of have the permanent immunity pass.

If you're just judging them by the past 10 years, they've blown games in every conceivable way. I actually shot, so 2011, that was when they were 10- point favorites against Seahawks, Hasselbeck through four TDs, beast mode, the whole thing. One of the biggest upsets of this century in the playoffs. The next year was the one when the Niners, they were three point, three and a half point favorites over the Niners. They took the lead member. And then Alex Smith came down. Yes. Go ahead. Touchdown to Vernon Davis in the last 97 seconds of the game.

They got the ball back. So that was awful. Then in 2018, the digs miracle TD, which is really probably the worst loss of this decade. All things considered other than Seahawks bats. Then last year, that Rams game,

which everybody blames the terrible non-pass interference call, but they also blew that game 19 different ways. And then what we had today, eight-point favorites against Kirk Cousins at home, and they don't take care of business. Why do we continue to say that Sean Payton is such a great coach? Let's start there. Well, yeah, I mean, to crystallize what you just said,

three playoff losses on the last playize what you just said, three playoff losses on the last play of the game, the last three playoff losses, and their last six playoff losses were one score. Yeah. And Sean Payton, I feel come to Dallas. This sounds perfect. It sounds like a perfect

push him out. What are we waiting for? Just do it. I joke that the loser of this game, Vikings Saints, the coach should come to Dallas anyway. You know, coach Zimmer started there too, but yeah. And I was also thinking the other way,

like if they don't win against Peyton, if they didn't win against the Colts and that onside kick Superbowl, this is, this is the most tortured fan base. I know you have losing teams for decades and decades, but every loss like this, this would be a number one at the top. Yeah.

You watch a few minutes and you're like, okay, this is all of a sudden, this is just two good teams and the Vikings have the better rushing attack. Yeah, and Aikman clearly had ideas because you can always tell the announcers the confidence they have and the

people they talk to the day before the game today is for the game. Yeah. And about halfway through the quarter, he's like, Mike Zimmer, he thinks they can win this game. Right. Every, all 53 guys think they're winning. And it was one of those things where if you were like us and you had the saints in a, in a tease, you're like, Oh, Oh, I didn't, it wasn't kind of that.

But back to the, speaking of Aikman, Aikman, and I love Aikman, but not a great Aikman moment when Taysom Hill is taking the snap. And he's like, any play without Drew Brees on the field is not a good play offensively for the Saints. And Taysom Hill throws the 48-yard completion to the three. And then everyone's like, then Brees fumbles, and he throws the pick before the half. You're like, maybe Teddy Two Gloves should come gloves should come in or, or a little more taste

some Hill. What are we doing here? Yeah. Taste some Hill was in the running for best quarterback. We watched this weekend. Yes, for sure. He was really good. And it seemed like every time he was in the game, the Vikings didn't really know what

to do. I, regardless, they kind of laid a pseudo egg, the saints, and yet still had a chance to win the game. They get a stop. It's like about 2.45 left, something like that. Minnesota's punting to them. They have one timeout left. They don't use it.

Right. We've seen this over and over again. This is actually the most egregious version of not using the timeout because by the time the Vikings actually punted and the guy caught it and started running it back, it also went over the two minute warning. So then they lose that timeout. Yeah. So they keep a timeout instead of just saving the 40 seconds, but then they also blow the two minute warning. They finally get the ball at 155. They ended up running seven plays. They have the stupid penalty with the runoff and then somehow keep the timeout. They accept the runoff. Like, wouldn't you want 21 seconds instead of 11 seconds, like 21 seconds,

you could run any play, get to the line of scrimmage and spike it. Any play, even a sack, you can get everybody back. You'd be able to figure it out, but they accept the run. They kicked the field goal with a timeout left. Especially because you have Drew Brees, who's allegedly one of the best 12 to 15 quarterbacks of all time. Wouldn't you trust him to throw an out? Three shots at the end zone or an out, get closer, whatever. They made the field goal. That didn't matter really.

But not being able to cover Adam Thielen did matter. Yeah, I thought the Saints stunk. And I thought they got outcoached and outplayed. At the same time, if I'm playing Minnesota in a playoff game, nobody's beating me deep. Kirk Cousins can pick me apart 8, 10, 11

yards for the whole game. Fine. Keep it going, but you're not throwing over the top of me because if I'm making you dink and dunk and go 8, 10 yards, eventually you're going to throw the ball to me or fumble or something. Are you talking you personally or you- I'm saying if I'm running the Saints.

Oh, I thought if you were on the- Okay. And me personally. But I'm just, that's the one way you're not beating me. And then Cousins beat them over the top a couple of times. Yep. I mean, Lattimore looked lost on Thielen and I don't know. It was a weird game.

And on the other side, Diggs is freaking out. You know, they're winning the game. But Thielen's catching everything his way. And Diggs is throwing a temper tantrum. And then, as Aikman pointed out correctly, he's like, I don't know if Cousins needs this. This is a tough spot for him as it is. Now he has to look for Diggs when he's not open. They're getting him involved in reverses and stuff.

Yeah, when Diggs is behaving like that, I'm sure you felt the same way. My default is just to think about how my son would act exactly the same way if he wasn't getting the ball. Exactly. Which your youngest kid probably is throwing a tantrum like that. Yeah. The five-year-old. Oldest, everything.

Yeah. All of them. Yeah. I'm not sure the right team won that game, but I thought the Vikings absolutely deserved to win it. And I thought they out-coached and out-played them. Yeah, I'm not sure the right team won that game, but I thought the Vikings absolutely deserved to win it. And I thought they outcoached and outplayed them. But the Saints have to be kicking themselves. Absolutely.

Kamara had 15 touches total. And it seemed like every time they got him the ball in space, it was at least five, six yards. And I don't know. Breeze, do you know what his playoff record is? Lifetime? What's your guess? A little over 500.

What is it? Well, now he's eight and eight. Is it eight and eight? Yeah. I remember running the stat this week. So Brady is 30 and 11 now. No, he's 30 and 12. Or 30 and 11.

That's right. Manning was 14 and 13. Favre, 13 and 11. Big Ben, 13 and 8. Joe Flacco 10 and 5, Kurt Warner 9 and 4, Wilson is 9 and 5, Rodgers 9 and 7. All of those guys have more playoff wins than Brees. Eli's 8 and 4, Phil Rivers 5 and 6. And it goes back to that 09 thing. You think about, you have that one run and you're just exempt for life. And this happened in Dirk Nowitzki in 2011.

It completely changed the course of his legacy. Yeah. You know, we, we've seen it over John Elway in 97, 98. He went back to back, but. Well, it's why Mike McCarthy is getting an interview tomorrow from the Cowboys, you know? Right. Yeah. But think about the Superbowl coach, if it's within the last decade or whatever.

If that onside kick in the colts game yeah in the super bowl if they just don't get it and then we spend the whole off season talking about how dumb champagne was through the onside kick and blah blah blah and this is the end of this bruce breeze thing this would be a really strange career to evaluate and i and i do think think he didn't make the NFL 100. And some people got upset about it, but it was basically between him, Favre, and Rodgers for that last spot. And in my mind, he was third out of the three.

I just feel like this has happened one too many times for him in the playoffs. And that's why you don't end up making that list. We talked about him. It's funny, Hanch and I, and you were invited, but you didn't show up. But Damoshek, we talked about the top 10 quarterbacks that we've seen.

Because I don't know. You can only go by really. I know you can't. You can go by a little more than what you see. We never watch Jim Brown. We see the same five highlights of Jim Brown, but his numbers bear out versus the rest of the league. But I like to be able to say,

hey, Dan Marino, I saw his receivers, you know, Super Duper and Mark Clayton. He should be held at a higher regard because neither of those guys were Hall of Famers. You know, I can't talk about that with Otto Graham, but Drew Brees was ninth on our list, best we've ever seen. I think he'd be in your top 10 too,

but he barely makes it. Yeah, he definitely wouldn't be top seven or top eight. No. And even with the great numbers. I mean, he's top two in any way you look at it. The numbers are phenomenal. When we were growing up, there was a lot of Marino, Elway, and Montana. And then after Montana won that last Super Bowl when he threw all the TDs when I was in college, whatever year that was, 90 or 91. Everybody was just kind of like, oh, Montana's the best ever. But then as the careers went on and on,

everybody took their different sides, right? Like Elway was like the most gifted. Yeah. But just didn't have the supporting cast and blah, blah, blah. Marino was the one that scared me the most. Yeah, man. What, 420 touchdown passes? I mean, you look at... I was looking like Marino.

I'm like, all right, who am I missing? Fouts or something? You look at Marino and Fouts. It's night and day. I know it's ridiculous how much better statistically Marino was than Dan Fouts. Yeah. We were all texting you, me, Damoshek, and Hench over the week about just how impossible it is to even compare

the passing stats. Because Staubach made basically the 70s QB spot in NFL 100. He got that spot over Bradshaw. When we were growing up, it was Staubach and Bradshaw. They were just kind of together. If you look at the totality of Bradshaw's career, four Super Bowls to two, you could argue he get it. I don't really care.

I feel like they mattered pretty equally. It was weird to have one and not the other. But then when you get to the 80s, it was really great how Elway, Marino, and Montana all carved their own way. And I felt, I was terrified of all three of them. Marino really, really just made me lose the feeling in my toes. If you're up three against him, two minutes left,

you just felt like he was going to come down and score. Then we move in this decade. I put Breeze and Favre to me are pretty neck and neck. Like guys who were from a lifetime record and all the stats and all that stuff. Really overpowering. But in the moment, it did feel like you could take them.

You know, like your team could beat them in the right situation or they might throw a pick at the wrong time. Yeah. The myth of Favre, especially because of Madden and, you know, some of the announcers who just loved him.

Right. He really was a little more up and down, especially, you know, especially after the late 90s. Yeah, I was going to say, you take those little more up and down, especially, you know, especially after the late nineties. Yeah. I was going to say you take those last few years, especially, I don't know,

last year or two with the Packers. And then add that Vikings year where, you know, and I think they, that was against the saints, right? Yeah. 48,

45 or something crazy. Like that could have, that was backyard football for like 32 games for him. But man, he's got Michael Thomas. He's got Kamara. He's got Jared cook. I said,

I've spent all weekend on 90, 90 different threads about how Brady didn't have enough help this year. Right. All three of those guys are better than any scope position guy. Brady had, but the thing that's amazing to me is just to have that in the dome at home where you would think like, if anybody has a home field advantage, it's the Saints. And they can't break Kirk Cousins?

Right. And I was talking about that. I was like, maybe this is the NHL first round. Maybe the Superdome is in home field. Big advantage. Foxborough certainly didn't seem like it yesterday. Seattle's playing on the road now. They're better on the road. There was seven and one. Is there anything? What's the biggest home field advantage? what are the big, you know, Seattle's playing on the road now. They're better on the road.

There was seven and one. Like, is there anything, what's the biggest home field advantage? What are the top two Kansas city? I don't know. I would say Denver only because of the altitude, but they're not even in the playoffs,

but yeah, we did five, six weeks ago. We did that podcast. We led the podcast with it about home field advantage. Just doesn't seem to really matter anymore i did i went 4-0 in my playoff picks this week my dream of 11-0 is still alive somehow i lost money but i went 4-0 with my with the four picks i didn't even really factor in home field in any of the

picks i ultimately like i didn't saints vikings i thought it was a tough line i could see it going a variety of ways but But the Saints at home, it just hasn't been reliable in the playoffs this decade. And it was not a reason to take that. One more thing about the Saints, though, before we leave it. Yeah. The way it ended. Did you think they were going to review that?

Yeah, we should talk about it. Because if they review it, they have to almost conclude it was a push-off. I'm not even thinking because they owe the Saints. Because it was a push-off is why they should have called was a push-off. I'm not even thinking because they owe the Saints. Because it was a push-off is why they should have called it a push-off. But if they choose not to review it, which was probably the easiest, less sticky way to go about it, then fine, the Vikings win.

But what did you think? I thought the right team won. I think that would have been a really flimsy call to overturn a game-winning touchdown that everybody already celebrated. You know, the only tight end who ever really got called for that push-off ever in the last 15 years. Here we go, Kyle. It was Rob Gronkowski. Oh, I remember him. Who was just officiated like Shaquille O'Neal.

There are different standards to him because he was so physically ridiculous. But normally, they just never call that. And there was a lot of hand-grabbing on both sides. For me, what was more egregious was it was so clear that that was going to be the play. They put Rudolph all the way in the top. I think Aikman even called it out. He was like, look at that.

They got Rudolph against a cornerback in the top. The think Aikman even called it out. He was like, look at that. They got Rudolph against a cornerback in the top. That was the Pats. The Pats invented that play with Gronkowski. And they had gone to that twice before and he had overthrown it. And I had said to Hench and Damoshek and Carolla, I was like, Rudolph's making a big catch this drive. And I didn't think it was going to be the last one.

It looked like they were going to have this amazing stand. And you're watching that game with the back history of Cousins. Just expecting him to do something dumb, right? Right. Even on that play, that would have been the classic Kirk Cousins. He throws the lob pass only. He underthrows it.

And the guy turns around and catches it for an interception or whatever. Right. He didn't do it this year. But whether we think he pushed off or not, I mean, I think the arms were extended. I've seen it called, you're right, more times than not. They don't call it. If they choose to review it and then show the replay in that stadium five, six times, whatever, and then don't over call it.

Now you're talking there could be an assault on these referees trying to get out of there. I kind of think they made the right move, the smart move. Did you think that it deserved to be overturned though? I don't know. Based on what the rule is or based on what they've called before? How about based on what we've watched all year? All right. Well, then no

call then. What they really need to do is get rid of that rule after the season because they have this dumb rule that they're supposed to be using. They're not using it. And then if they're ever going to use it, it would be this game and they ran from it. So they should just get rid of it before round two.

The cousins thing. And we've given him some shit on this podcast. Yeah. When the Viking signed him for a lot of money, our friend Joe house who lost his mortgage this weekend. He, him for a lot of money, our friend Joe House, who lost his mortgage this weekend. He was just laughing that somebody signed Cousins. He was like, good luck. This is the guy you want when you're down three or four minutes left and you want somebody to throw the gut-wrenching pick to the other team. Here's your guy. And just had completely written off any possibility of this guy

ever having a moment. Yeah. And Cousins was great. I think if you're looking at MVPs of the weekend, he's got to be the MVP of the weekend. For sure. Yeah. I think he's right up there. It really is. I mean, they had a running game.

That was nice. It opened up some passing lanes because Cook was running and Madison was running and they eased him into a pressure situation. But yeah, he was dynamite in a big game. And it really didn't make sense in terms of, you know, the, the saints played all their starters last year, maybe to a fault last week to a fault breezes in, I think in the fourth quarter last week and Viking sat everyone and look bad against the Packers the week before.

None of this made sense. Phenomenal, uhal playoff implications too, which we'll get to when we do Guess the Lines later, where now you have San Francisco gets to avoid Seattle. There's nothing worse than playing the team the third time. Well, they might play them next the week after. Well, that's true. It could still end up happening.

But you play that third game, it just feels like anything could happen. So they get to avoid that. Instead, they get Minnesota coming to San Francisco, feeling great about this huge Saints win they had. I think that's awesome. And then you have Green Bay-Seattle, where the history that those two teams have,

Seattle could absolutely win in Lambeau. Sure. And then if you're San Francisco, you go from their huge favorite this week, it's Minnesota. They might have this really strange Seattle team that could barely beat Josh McCown. Let's actually, let's take a break. And we'll talk about that game really quickly. Hey, did you know you can take a Sonos speaker anywhere you go? It's the Sonos Move, the durable battery-powered smart speaker for indoor and outdoor listening.

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Ladderlife.com slash BS. Ladderlife.com slash BS ladder life.com slash BS ladder life term policies are issued by fidelity security life insurance company, Kansas city, Missouri, not available in New York. Okay. Quickly, the worst game of the week was Seattle Philly, but it did feature what started to feel like a Disney sports movie. It was a sequel to the rookie with Dennis Quaid where Wentz gets hit in the back of the head. All of a sudden he's out. Now the Eagles have,

have pulled off the impossible. They've gotten every relevant player that they had was injured at some point over the last three months. Right. McCown comes in and actually looks pretty frisky and he's moving the ball. He's doing stuff. He's not like a disaster. This was not like, uh, you know, Josh Rosen coming in or something. This is like, he's at least competent enough and smart enough to tell what guys were to go. And at some point this became the classics dumb Seahawks game that they have every week. Kevin Clark does had a tweet that he always retweets when there's a dumb Seahawks game about how the Seahawks have never played a normal game. This one certainly qualified. Yeah.

But the Eagles are in this situation where they're driving 17, nine, and it seems like they might actually score setting up an incredible two point for not only the tie, but also swinging Vegas, which the line was between two and one all week, right? Where did it settle?

Yep. Where did it settle? One? It settled at one. Yeah. Right. Seattle minus. And then Josh McCown concert did a nice job of breaking it down.

He forgot that he was 40 years old. He thought he could scramble the end zone and clowny clowny from behind. But that was it. But well, they had some weird stuff like Sanders drops that ball on fourth and old. He thought he could scramble the end zone and clowny clown him from behind. Well, they had some weird stuff. Like Sanders drops that ball on fourth and five. First of all, they had three drives and they passed on the field goal. They had two drives and passed on the field goal each time.

I know it's a one score game, but are you thinking, isn't it a two score game with Josh McCown? Like, isn't that asking a lot for them to score and get the two point conversion? I don't know. If you can get the field goal with five minutes left. That's one thing.

But Doug Peterson, not sure he's got on second and 14 with 315 left. He runs from the 17 yard line. Miles Sanders gets a yard like you're really, really not trusting your quarterback here. And then, first of all, the coaching, I thought it was an homage to uh jason garrett how bad the coaching was all weekend long yeah all weekend long you i mean you name it i can't believe like mcdermott for o'brien save that one don't talk about that one ray but i'm just saying ever for for these teams to be so conservative and win is is insane and then then you got doug peterson the new philly special was running on second and 14

with three minutes left. It was bizarre to me. I didn't love the fourth and five call only because Josh McCown was the quarterback. And I probably would have gone for the field goal. But here's the thing. They had the perfect play. He just freaking flubbed it.

Dropped it. That seemed like that was going to be like a 15-yard play. Yeah, yeah. He was getting a first down. was going to be like a 15-yard play. Yeah, yeah. He was getting a first down. So they were obviously saving that play for that moment. Then they had it

and he just blew it. Which, by the way, I know we're going to talk about the Pats later, but not much different than Edelman dropping that pass on the final drive

but that was kind of the uh-oh moment of that game for the Pats fans. I got a lot to say about that. But you're right with Seattle. Like, every game has to be crazy. Once Wentz went out,

they were a seven-point favorite, Seattle, and they were only up 3-0 on the road. I was like, oh, they could be up 24-3 here, and that'll be it. But I think they let teams in the game only because they had such a fantastic record in one-score games, so they have to keep it at one score to win.

It's bizarre. But that DK Metcalf, unbelievable what he's become there. And Russ sealing the deal on third and long and just launching one from like 40 yards. What do you have? Seven receptions, 160. That's the most for a rookie in a playoff game. Incredible. I have a couple of Seahawks fans in my life who reminded me that we made fun of DK Metcalf

before the season. Yeah, I think it was definitely me. I think you were the other one, but talking about how he was like an... Maybe you weren't on the pod. I forget who it was. I was just talking about how he was soliciting, basically, people to draft him,

and he was doing the Instagram, and I called him an Instagram model. Meanwhile, he's like a hundred times better than Nikhil Harry was this week. A hundred times better. Maybe not better than A.J. Brown, but excellent. I think he suffered because

he was like a combine hero. He was like seen like, you know who screwed him like that? John Ross for Cincinnati who didn't really pan out. Yep. The fastest guy in the world and then just doesn't do anything. It doesn't translate, I think, you know, screwed him like that John Ross for Cincinnati who didn't really pan out. Yep. The fastest guy in the world and then just doesn't do anything, you know, doesn't translate. I think that's, he got a little backlash for that.

Well, what'd you learn from Seattle this week? Because to me, that feels like that's about as far as they should go from a talent standpoint. I think round one is about the peak for them. Right. I think they have trouble running the ball. I think Houston one is about the peak for them. Right. I think they have trouble running the ball. I think Houston has trouble running the ball.

It's going to be interesting to see how some of these teams survive. I think they had 64 yards rushing and 45 from Russ. And I think we could have fun talking about Marshawn Lynch, but he's just not going to be a factor against the Packers, and we'll talk about it. Well, I

think Seattle and Houston are very good comps where these teams that are obviously severely flawed, they're strangely coached at times. They rely a lot on a quarterback pulling a play out of his butt on third down because he's just great, both of those guys. And then the one big play receiver and running backs that don't scare you at all

and defenses that it feels like you can drive on them. A little bit of a frisky pass rush for both teams, but not really that frisky. And I don't know. I thought Seattle was lucky that Wentz went out, obviously, and that they were playing Philly in the first place. Houston was lucky that Wentz went out, obviously, and that they were playing Philly in the first place. Houston was lucky that Buffalo just didn't totally want to take that game. Houston was dying to give it to them.

They were like, here, take it. Buffalo settling for field goals. Meanwhile, Booger is making it seem like Josh Allen's having the greatest game any quarterback's ever played. Talking about his poise, and he's amazing, and they're just raving about him and they're just settling for field goals and they're letting them hang around. They finally get the turnover. All of a sudden, Watson, it's like he activates a switch, which Wilson can do too.

And then that game flips. That game was so much fun. That was the most fun game, not only of the weekend, but in a while. No, your game, you couldn't tell, but your game was the most, that game was so much fun. That was the most fun game not only of the weekend, but in a while. No, your game, you couldn't tell, but your game was the most. This game was the Irishman. Honestly, I was like, let this end. No one deserves to win. It went like an hour

too long. It's nice, Watson and Hopkins and Josh Allen. It's nice they get together for an ensemble cast here, but this is an hour too long and we were watching from shakies yeah and watching the so we have the subtitles with booger we didn't have the sound on oh what a treat that is what a treat when the guy bats it out of bounds to save it for the bills and i was like oh no i don't think you could do that and then you

say no harm no booger no harm no foul no all All right. That's the kind of know-how. That's what we want from an ex-player. No harm, no foul. He had some great moments. The highlight, I think, was when he said he called for a spike near the end of the fourth quarter with one of the teams. And it was like if the spike would have basically screwed them and they would have had to turn the ball over. But it was a lot of stuff like that. It was to me the perfect blend of hilarious announcing and really, really bizarre coaching.

You're being nice when you say hilarious and bizarre. I know you want to use other adjectives, but you're being very nice. Well, it's, you know. I'll tell you what was hilarious and bizarre is john mcdermott fourth and 27 with a minute 41 and all timeouts going for it uh i don't know maybe sure pass on the 60 yard field goal but really a fourth and 27 actually and he goes for it you didn't like you didn't like josh allen's chances no i didn't like josh allen's chances i didn't like Josh Allen's chances? No, I didn't like Josh Allen's chances. I didn't love

Watson on fourth and a long one, probably two. O'Brien calling for up the middle. You don't want that guy in space, right? He's got to do Deshaun Watson. He's got to go head first. The QB sneak against nine guys? What the hell was going on this whole weekend? It was crazy.

That was really bad. And also, the kickoff to start the second half, if they call that the right way, the Bills are up 20-0. He flipped them the ball.

Honestly, they got together. It's like, hey, we don't want people tuning out of this game. Let's leave it at 13-0. Let's see what happens.

But don't you feel like Houston's done? They call that right? I thought that was a spirit of the rule. Yeah. But yeah, they feel like Houston's done? They call that right? I thought that was a spirit of the rule. But yeah, they really... That game could have... If Buffalo

had protested the game, they would have lost, but it actually would have been a good thing for the Buffalo Bucks. I was looking at my notes when that Watson QB sneak, what does he weigh?

Like 190 pounds. Yeah. It's like fourth and a long one. Buffalo has like 3000 pounds of guys lined right up over the ball. And Watson goes into them and just immediately falls down. And Booger goes, I like the aggressive call though. It's like,

what? That was the worst call I've ever seen. And then it turned out it wasn't because three hours later, the Patriots did a fullback dive with a Landon Roberts on a something and one, which that was the new worst call of the day that I'd seen. That was pretty bad. But hats off to Watson

because that play that extended the drive leading to the game-winning field goal. Who was it? Milano and the safety. I mean, the one-two hit. It wasn't even like they hit him at once and he spun out of it. One guy rocked him.

He should have lost his balance there and then gets hit immediately after and still is able to come free and roll right and complete the pass. So play of the weekend. That's why I ended up, Russell and I, when we did Million Dollar Picks with House on Thursday, and I had a lot of trouble

with Houston Buffalo and Minnesota New Orleans. I just felt like I could see both sides of each case. Yeah. And it just came down to like, I just don't want to bet

against Deshaun Watson. I just don't. I don't care what the score is. I feel like he's going to pull these plays out of his ass, which is exactly what he does. And when you think about like the future of Tom Brady and even somebody like Breeze, these guys that don't have the ability to save plays like that, to save these

third and 11s where, oh, my first three things that I thought were going to happen didn't happen. I'm just going to save it and scramble for 15 yards or scramble around and buy time until somebody gets open. The older guys can't do that. No. And Watson and Wilson can do it. And that's why if I'm Green Bay and I'm a Packer fan feeling really good that all of a sudden I hit the jackpot, I have the Seahawks coming, the Wilson thing would just still scare the shit out of me.

Yeah, no, I don't think you are. I don't think they're excited about Russell Wilson coming there, especially after a win. And San Francisco is thinking the same thing. Like, hey, we played Seattle. I think they played them after they lost to Arizona, right? And they had a ton of injuries. Now you're talking about they win the wild card game if they

go in and beat Green Bay, and now they're coming to San Francisco. I don't want to say that's a toss-up, Green Bay, and now they're coming to San Francisco. I don't want to say that's a toss-up, but that's a really, really close game, and San Francisco doesn't want to be involved in it. It was so funny when they were really praising Josh Allen for like two hours. Yeah. And then he kind of lost control of the steering wheel

as that game got really tight. He literally lost control of the ball. It wasn't hit. He dropped the ball. He dropped the ball at one time. The other time, he was falling down in lateral to a startled third-string tight end. Right. And then

on the crucial play when they're trying to get in the field goal range and he took a terrible sack and then that led to the fourth and 27, but I still have questions about Josh Allen. I think that's fair. Yeah. Right? I think he could questions about Josh Allen. I think that's fair. Yeah, right.

I think he could win on the play. I think it's unfair to say he can't win a road playoff game because he was right there and that could have gone either way, but I don't know what spooked him in the second half. That was very strange. That was, I think, the Texans were like an 8 or 9 to 1

underdog at down 13-0 or 16-0, right? You missed J.J. Watt mic'd up, too, if you read Shakey's. I did miss him, yeah. It was a lot of, let's go! Yeah! Come on! Why is this guy mic'd up? You made a difference. You know what you missed, though, out of Shakey's Bowl? I want to give a shout-out to, first of all, it was only like four of us before Tall John and John Hamm got there. So when it's just four of us, this guy, I could see him eyeball me from across the restaurant. I'm like, oh, crap. Comes in. He's like, hey, I need to meet your Sal, right? I said, yeah. He's like, this is the Shakey's crew for the fantasy. I was like, yeah, yeah. He's like, I am such a huge fan of yours and Simmons. And, uh, you know, I, I just wanted to say like my

wife and I were coming in from Santa Ana and we're supposed to be the hot, see the Hollywood sign. And we drove by the Shakey's and I said, you know what? There's probably 30 Shakey's in LA, but let's just stop in. And she's like, Oh, come on. I don't want to stop. He's like, no, let's just stop in. I want to see if they're there. And he came in and said, hi. And he like, I introduced him there. He knew all the players. He's like, oh, I know this is Tony. Jesus. It was crazy.

It was a huge, huge moment for him. I was like, I don't know who's a bigger loser. Like you for stopping in or us for staying here because you're going to leave right after this. Or us for spending three hours in a shake-in. Yeah, we have to stay and watch and eat this food. Yeah, that brings us to the Crown Royal. The right call. Last year, Crown Royal

launched the first off-field water break to encourage fans of the game to moderate and hydrate, stay in the game. Whether you're watching in the stadium, watching at home,

or in a bar, have a great time, enjoy some Crown. Just don't be that person that ruins it for everyone. Make the right call and take a water break. Who made the right call

this week or not? I'm going to go here. I think the right call and take a water break. Who made the right call this week or not? I'm going to go here. I think the right call was whoever the person was in our league who lost the championship trophy. I thought it was a fitting way for this terribly dysfunctional, awful fantasy league to finally end. Somebody lost a trophy. There's a missing trophy.

And then we find out one of the people, one of the owners in the league, our friend Elliot. Yeah. He was a lawyer on the opposite side of the OJ Simpson memorabilia case when all of the trophies and stuff got stolen by OJ Simpson. Yes. So he's the lead suspect, in my opinion. Well, Damoshek, fortunately and unfortunately, has taken 99% blame.

He thinks he put it in his car. That later got totaled. Now, I don't understand how totaled did this car get? The trophy is bigger than any of his kids. I don't understand how it got destroyed. But he thinks it's in his trunk and his car got totaled. And that was that. Now, I owe him money and I'm going to buy a new trophy.

I don't know if he knows this. I'm buying a new trophy for the league and deducting what I owe him money and I'm going to buy a new trophy. I don't know if he knows this. I'm buying a new trophy for the league and deducting what I owe him from that. Right. I mean, it's, it's, we talked to him today. He's like,

I understand I lost it and we want to replace it, but who gives a good goddamn about a fantasy football trophy? I was like, you son of a bitch. Wait, can we go back to the part where his car got totaled with the trophy? His car got totaled and that's where car got totaled and uh that's where it got lost this sounds like even kyle i don't think would have told this story to his parents

at like his lowest moment in his late teens right kyle would you have used the my car got totaled and i lost the trophy no no for a human-sized trophy no i don't think so that's absurd well listen maybe we could put, because we have great reach here on this podcast, can we put out at all points, like if you run a junkyard and come across a trunk with a fantasy football trophy with stupid team names for the last 24 years,

please, please reach out to us. Well, that's kind of the bummer though, right? All the team names are right there. It is a bummer. I think it's a bummer. Unless it's a sign that we should just fold this terrible league. That's for sure a sign, but we got to keep going. It has to be a sign, right? All right.

What's your great call of the week? I don't know. Usually I like to give it to a coach, but it's impossible to give it to a head coach this week in the NFL. Ricky Gervais lost his mind tonight. That was fun. You know what? You know what I'm going to give it to?

The director of the movie 1917, which is the best. Have you seen it? I have not. It's the only one out of all the award contenders I've not seen yet. Well, I don't know.

I recommend seeing it in a movie, but it might be the best movie I've ever seen. I still don't understand what I'm looking at. I'm going to watch it again. It's phenomenal. It's one of those no cut movies, but they claim there's cuts in there.

I'm like, this is magic. I don't know how this is happening. It's hours and hours of different sets and picturesque backgrounds I've never seen before. And of course, it's a great war movie also. So I'm going to give it to that director Mendez. I think you might have just gotten on the poster this was magic, Cousin Sal the biggest podcast

well best war movie since Saving Private Ryan would actually make sense maybe it was Crown Royal reminds everyone this football season take a water break and moderate to stay in the game alright the moment you've been waiting for since

we've had this podcast since 2007. Yeah. It's your chance to have the official funeral for the Belichick-Brady era. Go ahead. No, I don't want to say anything. No, no, no. You should start it off. People are waiting to hear what you say. I told you

for weeks and weeks that this Patriots team was not good. And everybody thought I was reverse jinxing it and doing all this. I, I don't know what else I could have said, what other warnings I could have done. We, I told house, we were on text threads. I was begging you guys not to bet on the bats. We lost to Miami in week 17, Ryan Fitzpatrick went 80 yards down the field at us.

I use that as a negative, as a positive, as a fueling week 18 kind of thing. They just weren't good. They couldn't move the ball. And, you know, now it's turned, obviously shifts into this whole, what happens to these guys, which everybody knew was coming.

And is Brady going to leave? And I know you have the odds. Well, they have odds. Let's talk about the game first, though. Okay, go ahead. Did the right team win? See, that's the thing. I don't know if the right team won, but you could say we were bad.

We were bad. We were bad. And I told you so, but you could have easily won this game. You could have won this game. Zero points. Zero points in the second half. That was a problem. I thought they'd get

at least three uh I think you have coach Vrabel going out there and he's smiling he's beaming

he's like you know what I screwed Belichick over at his own game I had a tight end that nobody heard of a tight end the one position

they couldn't fix the Patriots uh what was his name Ferkser from Harvard the first guy from Harvard ever to score a touchdown in the playoffs tight end scoring he's gotta get under his skin the one position they couldn't fix the Patriots. What was his name? Ferkser. Yeah. Harvard. The first guy from Harvard ever scored touchdown in the playoffs. Tight end scoring has got to get under his skin. The fact that the,

the, they scored with two minutes left under two minutes left in the first half, that's Patriots football. And then that game with the clock, not going for it on fourth and four inside the 40. Again, we see this not wanting to put a team away,

but he does that thing with the clock that Belichick did, I think, to the Jets earlier in the season. And he's like, you know what? It all worked. Except I don't think it worked because within two plays of that, the Patriots were right where Tennessee punted. And Edelman drops the pass on second and six. If Edelman doesn't drop that pass, you're one first down away from kicking a field goal and winning the game. That's got to, you could say you were bad, and I thought that Dynasty would end on the road against Kansas City, but that's got to hurt.

That means you should have won that game. The play calling all year has been dubious, and then you saw that huge third and one or fourth and one. I can't even remember. Was it third and one or fourth and one, Kyle? Landon Roberts. Oh, it or fourth and one. I can't even remember. Was it third and one or fourth and one Kyle with Landon Roberts? Oh, it was fourth and one. Yes.

For the fullback dive up the middle of the Roberts. Yeah. Was I, I just would have, I don't even, if I, if I was Belichick and that was the play, I just,

I don't know what I would have done. You dump a Gatorade on McDaniel's head, but, but actually hit him with the bucket too. I just can't believe that was the play. Oh, this'll take them by surprise. First of all,

the fullback dive never works anyway. And then you're running with Roberts, but then the, the sequence inside the five yard line, if that didn't sum up the Pat season, they just couldn't, they couldn't score enough points in these games all year. It was such a struggle

for them to score it. And this is going to piss you off. I'm going to go to a soccer analogy here. Oh yeah. Go ahead. The way the pats were wired this year offensively. And it was partly because of, of the, some limitations Brady has at this point as a quarterback, but then also the skill position guys, the lack of a deep threat, the lack of a tight end who could run down the middle and catch a 20 yard pass, the lack of any running back with big play ability, all that stuff. They, they were like a soccer. They were like a possession soccer team. They start in the back and they just try to string together 14 straight passes in a row to get a shot. Whereas you see these other teams, you know,

like Seattle today, it's like, Hey, here's an idea. We'll just throw it downfield to TK Metcalf. Maybe he'll catch it. They just didn't have the ability to, to ever make a big play.

And all the big plays they did make. You curse Brady on text. And then you're like, when is he going to make an accurate throw? And then he threw a nice one down the seam. Yeah. 30 yards. And it got called back.

Well, another dubious call. Another stupid. What was it? Uh, an eligible downfield. Number 16. Yeah. I never know about that one. Um, but the, the, you know, they did another trick play in the game.

It's just, they didn't have the horses and Hench and I were texting a lot and you go, all right, so what happened? Is it, is this a short-term thing? Is this something that could be fixed? I personally think it could be fixed because you look at the Sanu trade, they gave up a second round pick. He's either a D minus an F or an F minus, depending on how you're grading him. Nikhil Harry over Debo, DK Metcalf and a whole bunch of other receivers. Whether he's going to be great or not, he just didn't help them this year. And you look around these other rookie receivers

help their team. Brady can never get on the same page with them. Sonny Michelle over Nick Chubb. Who would you rather have? They took the wrong Georgia running back in that draft. Waving Antonio Brown over just putting him on the exempt list. And now we have to carry his cap salary and that whole thing.

And just the whole Antonio Brown, everything about that, that was kind of a Hail Mary with a crazy guy. But don't you think, and I think I'm making the same point as you, but don't you think Belichick's like, okay, we have to get lucky between Jacoby Myers. He was a rookie, right? Fourth round, fifth round Jacoby Myers Nikhil Harry Josh Gordon

Antonio Brown Mohamed Sanu one of these has to pan out absolutely one we screwed up by not upgrading not upgrading

not replacing Gronk with anyone suitable so that was the other thing I was going to say no Gronk replacement well that's it and you look at all these teams

they have at least decent tight ends you know who we had was Hollister, who every week makes big plays for Seattle. Right. So I think everybody thinks the Pats are done and they're dead and it's finished

and let's move on. We finally got rid of them. I just think it was not their year. And I think it would be foolish to write off this team for the rest of eternity. They still have talent. They still have rest of eternity. They still have talent. They still have Belichick. They still have the ability to make some moves

in the offseason. I personally, I know we're going to do the odds with Brady. I think he stays. Oh, you think he stays now? I do. I looked at it from every angle. Did you change your mind the last six hours? I did.

I changed my mind. What happened? I think this is all an orchestrated PR thing that he's doing to try to put pressure on Kraft and Belichick to actually go get some real offensive weapons. Instead of just patching it together. I think he's... Why does he have to threaten to retire to do that? I mean, it's obvious. I don't think he's going to retire.

I don't think he has any intention to retire. Yeah. I think Tennessee is the spot. I don't know where they are on the odds. They have a quarterback who's... All their quarterbacks are free agents after this season. Oh, you're talking about where he might go. You're saying he might not stay.

Well, I'm just saying if you're him and you care so deeply about your legacy, you're already the greatest quarterback of all time. The only real thing you haven't done yet other than put some of these records away is to prove that you could win a title without Belichick. So if you're actually going to do that, you're not going to go to like, I don't know, Miami.

Tennessee is not even on this list for uh I'm looking at like 17 teams Tennessee has they need a quarterback they don't technically have one under contract they're a top 8 playoff team right now they have weapons

Mike Vrabel it's very Patriots-ish so I think they would have to be on it. I think the Chargers would be the other one because that's the one team. If you're just talking about what NFL team would overpay for him. Right.

You think Brady's like, I want to throw to Ferkser. They got a tight end. I'm going to Tennessee. Brady's like, who's that Ferkser? Do you think he'll go to Cabo with me? I want to throw to him in May. The Browns are 11-2.

That's if he doesn't go to New England, if not the Patriots. Browns 11-2. Panthers 6-1. Las Vegas Raiders, wow, that's weird to see. 6-1. Chargers 6-1. Cowboys 7-1. I mean, that's, come on.

Colts 8. Tampa Bay 9. And then you got Denver, Minnesota 12. That's stupid. So I think the Colts are another one. That would be my third. My top three would be Titans, Chargers, and, 12. That's stupid. So I think the Colts are another one. That would be my third. My top three would be Titans, Chargers, and Colts. Here's why I say the Colts.

This is based on nothing. Colin Coward keeps throwing out the Colts for Brady. Colin Coward loves Chris Bowerd. I think they're probably friends. It feels like he's got inside info. You're going to have to corner him on the FS1 in the office. All right, I'll find him. I feels like he's got inside info. You're going to have to corner him on the FS1 in the office. I feel like he knows something.

Because that's such a random team to throw out. Like the Colts? That doesn't make sense. But then you think about it. You know, they have great offensive line. I don't know if their scope position guys

are markedly better than the Patriots. You know, if T.Y. is on the field, they are. But T.Y. seems like he gets hurt every year. But I think the Chargers are the... His one chance to get like 50 million for two years or something.

Yeah, well, that's come to California. Save this franchise. We can't sell any tickets. So that's... No, what you just said is the key part. Can't sell any tickets. Yeah. Because you're talking about seat licenses and all the stuff there.

That stadium's launching next year. Who the fuck are, nobody cares about the chargers here. Yeah. But are people that dumb to, I mean, Brady's not going to play six years in LA though. It's a LA is cares about stars.

It's going to be one year. Tom Brady's on the chargers. That's a big deal. Yeah. Well, it's not going to happen because first of all, to retire, the Noah's minus a deal. Yeah. Well, it's not going to happen because, first of all, to retire, the no is minus 1,000. Wow.

Belichick's no is minus 1,500. Win total with Brady is 10. For next year? For next year. If he's there. If he's a Patriot. The win total is 10. The division, you want to guess what the AFC East is if Brady plays?

Pats are probably still minus 200. No, wow. Good call. Exactly. Minus 200. And there you go. And then just that he stays in New England, yes, is minus 200. So I personally would rather see him retire than go to another team.

Sure. But just from a selfish standpoint, I also 75% of me wishes he would retire just because I think he's had already had the best career ever. He's made plenty of money. Um, get out with your health. Don't have that last year.

Like what Manning had with Denver, even though they won the super bowl that I, I didn't, nobody wanted to see Manning like't have that last year like what Manning had with Denver, even though they won the Super Bowl. Nobody wanted to see Manning like that that last year, right? No, I know. But don't you think part of them is... I know exactly what you're saying, but don't you think part of them is like

nothing could be worse than losing a playoff game on a pick six? Yeah, but the thing is, once the years pass, nobody remembers the last year. Can you name the last year do you can you name the last year for like any famous athlete like you always gravitate toward the good memories and the good stuff i'll remember this one depicts well because it's it's swung uh we'll get into

that that's part of my parent corner it's it's swung a lot of stuff i uh i 43 year old Brady next year. I just don't know how dominant that quarterback's going to be, no matter who the weapons are. And if the case is, well, if you gave him awesome weapons, it's like, well, couldn't you say that about 20 quarterbacks? Yeah. If you gave Ryan Tano some weapons, he'd be good too. Like you had Austin P on your schedule the first two months.

So consider that. So I think it's going to be a struggle to get to 10 wins, and the Bills are right there with you. Unfortunately, the fact that the Brady thing became such a soap opera immediately after obscured some of the shit that went on with this Pats team. The fact that their defense, I still don't totally understand what happened,

how this defense lost the ability to get stops. And, you know, Chung, who had trouble staying on the field all year, he goes out, the backup comes in and immediately gets torched by the Harvard Tannehill. That was the one good play Tannehill had. Right. What did he have, 72 yards otherwise?

And then you got superhuman Derek Henry running on you. Right. But, you know, a lot of people have made this point. When the guy's running all over you in the playoff game, a lot of people have made this point when the guy's running all over you in the playoff game, it doesn't necessarily ever lead to points. It just leads to them having the ball all the time. Exactly. But they only scored 14 points. We should have been able to beat that. Tannehill probably made three really good plays. I thought he was starting to get shakier and shakier in the second half on the line, but the team just didn't have

it. I think you needed to go up 10-0 to force Tannehill to throw. That's it. That's all. So it was interesting how I handled it versus how nephew Kyle handled it. Kyle's still devastated. It looks like he lost his dog, his car,

and our fantasy trophy. He's just in a complete funk. I was at the house money of this whole thing for a while this is two full decades of this this is incredible and you know if it's over finally then it's over

I never expected it to end that great I talked to Rosillo on Thursday's pod about how it was like the Bird Parish McHale Celtics it hit a moment where it's like oh Bird Parish, McHale Celtics. It hit a moment where it's like, oh, yeah, all right. The magic's not totally there anymore, but what a run. And I feel that way about this team. And I'm sure you think about those starback cowboys.

No, but at some point it ends. And then you have Danny White as your quarterback. I know, but it doesn't make for a good podcast if you're like, oh, well, we were the greatest and now we're not. So just, I would rather you be upset. We won six Super Bowls. How many Super Bowls are we supposed to win? Can't you pretend to be upset at least? This is so boring.

I knew this team didn't have it this year. Do I think they can come back next year and go 13-3 and be in the hunt again? Yes. Oh, all right. I do. Okay, well, that's foolish. I like that a little bit.

Why is that foolish? Not 13-3. Whatever. I really think your days of 12 wins are over. I do. I think that first part of the schedule was stacked so, you know, you had such bad teams on there the first eight weeks. I'm not betting against Belichick.

I think they had a couple shaky drafts. I think they played a couple moves this offseason that just didn't work. And that shit happens. And if anything, it shines a bigger light on how unbelievable it is to have the kind of success they have. So many things can go wrong. You know, 2008, they had the best team that year

and Brady goes out in eight minutes. And you would think that would have happened five, six, seven times over the course of this last 20 years. And it just didn't happen as many times as it should have. I just thought he was going to throw the kitchen sink at Tennessee. I just think that like, it showed me more about Belichick that he really didn't have answers. He really could have won this game.

It's definitely a winnable game. Throw the kitchen sink at it, fill it with deflated balls and spy cams and whatever you need to get it done. And he didn't. So you think more cheating? Yeah, yeah. Definitely more cheating. They didn't cheat. They obviously didn't cheat against Tennessee. The coaching

was really subpar and that was another thing that got swept under the rug. You were mad at McDaniels. You're like good riddance. The play calling was bad. It just was bad. But the thing and I think they would have lost anyway. The game was almost definitely over. But that thing where you try to block the punt and you put everybody in the line

and you have nobody returning it, and then the ball rolls to the one-yard line to officially end the game, I just don't get that at all. Well, I think we were very young the last time we heard an announcer say, they're bringing everyone. And then it was blocked. Right. It actually got blocked. The other thing is

Edelman wasn't even part of that pass rush. He was like in no man's land. He was at like the 35 anyway, right? What is he doing? It was terrible. It was just bad coaching. And I think there was some arrogance with how they put together this year's roster because one of the weird things about it was they didn't have a kick return coaching. And I think there was some arrogance with how they put together this year's roster because one of the weird things about it was they didn't have a kick returner.

And you watch, you know, the New Orleans kick returner today really kept them in the game. At the end of the first half, he has that great return, sets up the field goal that Lutz ends up missing, but he single-handedly pulled three points out of the sky for them. And the Pats had Patterson, you know, know the last couple years who was great at that and uh and didn't have that but you know you think about it's all the little stuff that just started to turn on them dumb penalties watson's 40 yarder getting called back because of that yeah like that's the stuff that usually

didn't happen with the belichick teams it usually usually happened to the other team. It was D4 jumping off sides or encroachment, whatever he did last year. They were relying on that. I would urge everyone. I'm sorry you're not upset. I really am. I would urge everyone, how can I be upset? I think we should have done this last night. I think it would have been more genuine. Kyle can vouch.

I was not that upset last night. Yeah, all right. Yeah. I was upset that you weren't upset, to be honest. Well, because I wasn't surprised. Yeah, whatever. If you lost 28-3, it's one thing, but that's not how you want to go out at home. In a game, you could win.

It would have been worse, in my opinion, to pull that one out and then get absolutely annihilated by the Chiefs. I would have hated that way more. Really? Good point. Losing to Andy Reid. You've lost a dynasty to what's probably going to be a Hall of Fame quarterback. Now you lost to Fitzpatrick and Tannehill back to back.

I don't feel like the dynasty's over. I do. I think. I can't do it. Everyone, I apologize. Everyone listening. I'm trying to get something out of him. I can't do it. Everyone, I apologize. Everyone listening, I'm trying to get something out of him. I can't do it.

Maybe I'm in denial. The way I... We're going to get to it in a minute, but I definitely took this loss harder than you, and I'll tell you why in the parent corner. Well, the only way this dynasty is actually over is if one of these two people leave. If Brady Belichick and Kraft are all there next year and they go and they spend money on a tight end, you know, like they,

is Kyle Rudolph available? I remember there was a split second during this, but after they drafted Irv Smith, when it seemed like Rudolph was going to become available, I was like, Oh my God, that's like the perfect Gronk. I don't think he really panned out, Irv Smith.

He was doing so. Didn't he have a big block today or something? He did. Or like a big pass interference or whatever? I think you need more than a big block on this thing. It was a great run, Sal. I don't know what to tell you. No regrets.

Congratulations on the loss. I'm happy for you. Disgusting. It's a great 19-year. You don't know. Congratulations. Congratulations on the loss. I'm happy for you. Disgusting. It's a great 19 year. You don't understand like the first 32 years of my life. They were an embarrassment. They were the jets. They stunk.

Well, they could have been an embarrassment this year. Keep that mental case, Antonio Brown on the roster. And you would have won. You would have been playing next week. He definitely would have made things more interesting. He's making it interesting.

Now he's trolling you guys. All the teams that he almost played for are out now. Yeah, that's true. We'll take a break and then we're going to do guest lines. Here's a New Year's resolution that you'll want to stick to. It's time to stop wasting time at the post office and use stamps.com instead. If you listen to me dating back to the ESPN days, God, the BS report, 2011, 12, 13, whenever

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Shout out to the Titans. They did everything they had to do in that game. I thought Henry was absolutely terrifying. The one time he slipped in the backfield was really the only time you could keep him. It wasn't scary. When I was a kid,

the Pats made the playoffs in 1978. I think we probably had one of the three best teams, but then our coach Fairbanks, it came out that he signed a deal to coach for the university of Colorado, like right before the last game of the season. And it just like kind of fucked up the season, but we had a home game against Houston.

My dad actually took me to that game. It was me and my dad and my uncle Bob. I forget who else. And we played Earl Campbell and Dan Pastorini and the Oilers. And Earl Campbell was just running through us. And Pastorini had a couple of long passes, but I just remember like them being unable to tackle Earl Campbell. Right.

And just this horrible, uh, Pat's memory of just like filing out of the stadium, all sad. And the Derek Henry thing reminded me of that like filing out of the stadium all sad. And the Derrick Henry thing reminded me of that. Wow. Where it's just like, oh my God, this fucking guy.

Jesus, again? Oh. Well, if it makes you feel any better, Dan Pastorini has like a 1-900 number where he sells picks. Is that true? Shout out to Dan. So there you go. I'm doing this from memory, but Dan started the game with like a 70 yard touchdown really

and it was just one of those playoff games where the crowd's all fired up and then immediately they're like uh oh that was a good team guess the lines you want to talk about Garrett before we do guess the lines I don't know honestly didn't it seem like

Jerry saw the Eagles play for a quarter, albeit without their start. And it was like, Oh my God, we lost a division to this team. It was like, let's make it official. Jason Garrett's got to be out.

But what did they talk about for a week? What did we talk about? What do you mean? No, what did, Oh, they had three meetings. What did,

what did, what happened in these meetings? I think what happened was I have a little bit of insight in my mind, but I don't know who knows what's true these meetings? I think what happened was, I have a little bit of insight in my head, but I don't know. Who knows what's true anymore? But I think they're like, we want to put you in the organization somewhere.

And he's like, I want to coach. Like, all right, come back tomorrow. We'll figure out a better fit. And I think there was like two meetings of that. And finally they're like,

you're not coaching. Well, I don't know what to tell you. So you're part of the organization or you're not. And that was that. And then I'm in. I hope and pray he ends up on an NFL team next year so we can make more jokes about the Clapper. I know it'd be good. Just go to the Giants. Just go. It'd be great. I also think McDaniels on the Browns would be mesmerizing for a lot of different reasons. Do you think this is like NBA? This is the equivalent.

I was talking to our friend Alec about this. This is the equivalent, like Black Monday in the NFL is the equivalent of NBA free agency. Where it's just like a free-for-all? Yeah, and it's just exciting. It's a different kind of excitement, kind of away from the game,

but still part of it. And, you know, these guys are fired and there's all kinds of talk about where they're going to go because you don't get football free agency. You get it, but it's not like this. It does feel like that. And the other piece of it is that you're not just acquiring the coach.

You're acquiring some sort of philosophy, right? So if the Baltimore guy is going to get hired, the OC, Greg Roman, Mallory doesn't want to admit it, but it's going to happen. And whoever hires him, he has this proven track record now of creating these really great offenses for a specific type of quarterback. These athletic quarterbacks that can do a whole bunch of different things.

So if you're an owner and you hire Greg Roman, then I think you go after Taysom Hill. Yeah. I think you're like, hey, man, you know that guy who comes in in the Saints games and he's awesome every single time? We're building our team around him.

Yeah, right. I don't know what the fans would do. The fans would be like, oh, okay, cool. That sounds great. Why wouldn't it be good? We've discussed this since people compare him to Lamar Jacks. Like, well, he's no Lamar Jacks. Yeah, he's not the best player in football. Fine.

He can maybe still run an offense. There's a certain type of identity you could have with a quarterback like that. I would sign him. Sure. I think he's better than at least 10 starting quarterbacks, but if you sign somebody like that, it's got to be part of a whole bigger master

plan. that's what made it so funny about you know like when jacksonville signed nick foals but then they had four net it was like what is this why do you have why do you have this guy who does one thing but then you have this power running back and you see that over and over again where the teams put together almost like a fantasy team over how about this forget about philosophy i want a coach that could win a game jason garrett didn't win one game on his own in the last eight years i don't think right you know belichick i don't want to put him to belichick's name but he won belichick won dozens of games on his own you know jason garrett forget about like the one score

games he was oh and five and stuff like that but they cut his balls off too. He wasn't running the offense. Wasn't really running the defense. So what's he in charge of at this point? Like clock management? How much respect are you going to get from your team? How much motivation are you going to have? And how are you ever going to be able to win a game like that? You have to be, it seems like you have to be good at one thing.

Yeah. Like what's your one thing? Like Belichick ultimately defenses his thing. Yeah. Like, what's your one thing? Like, Belichick ultimately defenses his thing. And, you know, and obviously all the little things and all the stuff that he brings to the table. But at its heart,

he's a defensive genius. Mm-hmm. Like, what is Jason Garrett's thing? Nothing. I mean, he was a good quarterback's coach. He got along with the quarterback. And then the offense, you know, followed with...

He's a people person. Sort of good flow. And then that fell apart and they took that from him. So what, what's the point? Jason's in his giants interview. They're like, Jason, what's your one thing? And he's like, I I'm a people person. I like to clap, click, click with my players. Yeah. I can learn how to juggle if you want me to ditch the clapping or, uh, I don't know. It's like Freddie Kitchens. When you were the coach of the Browns, what was your one thing? He's like, I was the coach of the Browns, what was your one thing?

He's like, I was the coach of the Browns? I had no idea. I'd do Freddie for Jason straight up. Freddie for Jason. It was a horror movie. I didn't even realize that. It's a horror movie, literally. I hope the Clapper stays in the NFC with the Giants.

From a comedy standpoint, it is by far the funniest outcome. He owes the Cowboys that. And it seems like there's been enough stuff floated around that it seems like it's not inconceivable. No. Let's see it. Good shakeup.

Well, you know what else is inconceivable? Of round two, guess the lines where we have four home favorites all favored by more than three points, I'm guessing. Yes, you are correct. Yeah. Can't remember the last time that happened. Really? Usually there's the three big favorites,

but then there's the one that it's a field goal or two and a half. Was it? Yeah, well, last year, Kansas City played Indianapolis. Patriots were favored over the Chargers by at least four and a half, right? That was lower, though. Remember that line went down to like four.

Did it? All right. Rams were favored by a touchdown over the Cowboys. I don't remember New Orleans over Philly, but that had to be over four. Yeah, maybe. All right. You shot my point down. Well, you know what?

I will say this, as long as we brought up last year. I was always under the impression that one of these bye teams or two of these bye teams comes off sluggish, but it didn't happen last year. Casey put up 31. Your Patriots scored 41. Rams scored 30. Actually, maybe the Saints. The Saints ended up with

20. That was a back and forth game. Philly maybe should have won that, knocked them out before they lost to the Rams. So maybe there is one team you got to look out for here. I think we have four good teams. I'm going to list the four. Three of them had buys. The Ravens,

Chiefs, and Niners. I honestly think the Titans... I've been saying this for weeks, and everybody thinks I'm full of shit. I think the Titans are really good. I didn't understand why that Pats line was five. I'm sure the Titans line this week against the Ravens, they're going to be getting a ton of points.

Mm-hmm. And I think they're good. I think they have a good team. They are good, but what you said, what people are saying, it's true. It's like you have a great running back. It's going to take you a while to score. I think you in your head have the vision

of Ray Rice running 80 yards on you and just a bunch of those plays. It doesn't really happen like that. But I thought the Patriots defense, other than a couple of fuck-ups and the fact that they couldn't tackle Henry, but they completely took out A.J. Brown. He wasn't even mentioned in that entire three hours.

And that guy was basically doing what DK Metcalf did today. Well, that's what I mean. They ended up with 20, but they had 14, the whole, they really had 14. Yeah.

They really had 14. He had the last touchdown. Yeah. Although Logan Ryan did drop a pick six or whatever. That would have been bad. Um, all right. So we have four games.

What is the, I didn't look at the times of when the games were. What is the early? The Saturday is the same as this Saturday. It's a four 35 and eight 15 on the East coast, Minnesota at 49ers four 35 Saturday Eastern. Okay. We'll start with that.

I picked the Niners by eight. I probably went too low. No, I went higher. I said eight and a half. It's only seven. Oh. Vegas impressed with Kirk Cousins. Okay.

So, I don't know if Kirk Cousins is going to be done, thanking God, by Saturday at 135, 435. But I don't know if you saw the clip online of Kirk Cousins with his team after the game. I don't know if you saw the clip online of Kirk Cousins with his team after the game. I did. Where he ended the big speech by screaming, you like that? And the team went nuts. Seems like they

like him. Except for Diggs, who hates everybody. Yeah, Diggs was home already. They were like, hey, Diggs, congrats on the win. He's like, man, I didn't get the ball at all. He's like, no, no, we won. We the win. He's like, man, I didn't get the ball at all. Yeah. He's like, no, no, we won. We get to play next week.

Ah, man. I was open like five times. Diggs might appear on Parent Corner. What are you doing? Diggs versus my son. I don't know. I don't know who's more reliable. So you're scared to put the Niners on a teaser here. No, you know how I feel about the Niners.

I showed you with my giant Super Bowl bet on them. I think this is a nice spot for them, and I'm not afraid to put them in a teaser. Okay. That Vikings defense, that Danell Hunter always scares me. If they get hot, that's the only thing I'm thinking. The Niners top to bottom are better, but a little scary on defense.

They definitely got a really nice push from their front seven, but it does seem like you can throw on them. I just don't understand how Kamara's not involved in the game today. So bizarre. He had a nice last three weeks, month, and then... Just play the hits, man. We're in the playoffs. That guy's got to touch it at least 25 times, right?

Yeah. 25 minimum, 17 runs and eight catches at minimum. And then if I'm on the other team and I'm playing the Saints and he spreads out wide like a receiver, I'm terrified. I have to cover him with a linebacker? I don't know. The genius Sean Payton. Pretty rough. Nine or seven

over the Vikings. Alright, what's the late game on Saturday? Late game, Saturday night. There you go. Tennessee at the Ravens. It's a fun one. Oh, Lamar. Look at those primetime spots for Lamar. Two Saturday nights in a row for the Titans. This game will be cold. How cold do you think?

I'm going to look this up right now. Saturday night in Baltimore. Right now it's 35 degrees. All right. Oh, wow. It's looking like 65 degrees next Saturday in Baltimore. Well, during the day. Yeah. Yeah. All right. So that still dips to like. degrees next Saturday in Baltimore. Well, during the day. Yeah.

Yeah. All right. So that's still dips. Yeah. That's great though. That's good news for. I don't know. Who's that good news for?

Who do you know? Derek Henry run killed. It's hard to tackle him in cold weather. Yeah. I had the Ravens by nine over the things we split this. I said nine, also nine and a half. It actually opened at 10.

It's down to nine and a half. That's absurd too much too much nobody believes in us here i personally think the line should be six i added a field goal because i knew the ravens lamar by week home all that stuff but i think the titans are good and this line's too high but if the patriots offense is a i don't know five or six you gotta give them that much what's the ravens i know you don't like that they don't know, five or six? You gotta give them that much. What's the Ravens? I know you don't like that they don't have a deep threat, but Ravens are still an

eight and a half, nine, right? I guess. I just think that's... We have to see if Ingram's playing also. You really said the Titans getting killed? Probably not. They better lose. I'm starting to get excited about being 4-0 in the playoffs.

That's good. I've never done the 11-0. I think 0-11 is just as... 0-11 is awesome. Yeah, it's just as a big accomplishment. Well, I would advise people not to tease

or partake of the Ravens. What is the early Sunday game? Sunday is Houston at KC. It's late. They're treating this like it's conference championship time. 3.05 PM Eastern

is the first kickoff Sunday. Houston KC. 3.05 Eastern. Interesting. So then the second one's 6.40. I think I might have gone too low on this. I had that Chiefs by 8. We both had 8. We both went too low. Chiefs 9.5. Oof. These are that Chiefs by eight. We both had eight. We both went too low. Chiefs, nine and a half. These are monster numbers.

The Texans beat them. Probably the best game they played all year. They beat them in Kansas City already this year. It's tough because it's one of those things where the Chiefs are up 20-6 early in the fourth quarter and you're feeling great. Then all of a sudden Deshaun goes off and it's 20-6 early in the fourth quarter,

and you're feeling great. And then all of a sudden, Deshaun goes off, and it's 20-20 or however it ends up. I think, though, if you're a Chiefs fan, I'm friends with Chiefs friend Trevor. Out of the three possibilities, you were going to play either the Patriots, the Houston, or the Bills.

Yeah, this is the one. I've talked to a couple of Chiefs fans. They're like, this is the best scenario. Yeah, no question. one. I've talked to a couple of Chiefs fans. They're like, this is the best scenario. Yeah. No question. Yeah. For the high lines with them, though, I do wonder with the weird running game they have,

whether they can run away. That defense has been so good. I mean, I think they've allowed like 11 points a game over the last six or something. Man, it's all set up for Andy. That's another thing we could have talked about today. Andy's got the worst team left in the playoffs. He's playing in round two at home.

Yeah. Although, how many times has he blown the spot gambling-wise? I hope he doesn't. I mean, I'm okay with any NFC result now. See, that's what a lot of people are complaining. Now that the Patriots are out, they have no one to root against. I'm kind of in the same boat. I can make a Minnesota-Seattle conference championship game. That could be interesting, even though it's not preferred by the networks. But don't deny us Ravens-Chiefs here.

I want to see that next week. Ravens-Chiefs is great. Niners against either the Packers or the Seahawks would be fun. The Seahawks, all the history they have. And then, you know, Rogers, won Super Bowl, hasn't been back since. Mm-hmm. Going against the team that passed him up. It feels like that's just kind of destined to be the game. Right. And then we have to see the clip of him at the draft for a month.

I want to see Jimmy G and then I don't really care. And then I want the favorites in the AFC. That'll be fun. Who do you want Tess Torenberger to call in the Australian television feed for the Super Bowl? What's the best one for you? We lost Boston Scott. There's no Boston Scott anymore. Can Boston Scott get picked up by the Niners?

It's too late, right? The Australians are going to be like, why does Booger keep talking about Jimmy G's poise? What is poise? I've never heard that word. The Australians are going to be like, we're rooting for your Iran in the war. What is this?

What a mess. Oh, my God. All right, last one. This is a fun one. Packers-Seahawks in Green Bay. Did you see that thing? They interviewed Wilson right after the Seahawks game. And Michel Tafoya broke the news to him that he was playing the Packers.

He intentionally didn't look at it. What? Really? Yeah. And he's like, so you're going to Lambeau next week? And he's like, oh. He's like, I didn't know who we were playing. I didn't want to know.

I didn't want to think about it. He's like, well, I wrote down the playoff scenarios on a pad. It's in my hair somewhere. His hair's looking great. I love it. I love it too. It's unbelievable. Yeah, so great history with them. You know this game's going to be weird.

The Kevin Clark rule that all Seahawks games have to be weird combined with the fact that all Seahawks Packers games really have to be weird. Yeah. I put all Seahawks Packers games really have to be weird. Yeah. I put this in the Vegas zone. I just add a principle. I have Packers by four and a half.

I had that. All right. I had to win this to tie. And I did, I said four and it's down. It's three and a half actually. Oh boy. One of these teams,

Houston or Seattle that can't run the ball. I know Russ can run the ball, but that don't have running backs that are prominent, is going to get blown out, I think. You know my theory about how I would never spend a high first-round pick on a running back unless it was Saquon Barkley? I would just never spend money on a running back

because there's five on every team. Yeah. And three guys get hurt and the four stringer comes in and then that guy's awesome. And it's like, why do we care about running backs? I think Homer might be the line. The guy in the Seahawks. I got, yeah.

Because I was rooting for the Seahawks because I wanted to go 4-0 for the weekend. Right. Every time they handed off to Homer, I thought something bad was going to happen. It just seemed like, especially because he fumbled early, but when they were inside their own 10 and they did that

pitch to him, I almost had a heart attack. There was some weird stuff. There was some weird play calling. Just a lot of wide handoffs. Even a Dalvin Cook pitching the ball to him left. He's scrambling. He's running through tackles and everything.

Homer's right there. Homer's a $1,200 daily fantasy player. Lynch, who every... And he had the TD today, but it's clear that he's got, what, 10 carries a game in him, max? He had six for

seven yards, right? Yeah. So. Yeah, that's the thing. He can't be on the field all the time either. The Packers, I think, are going to look at that tape and go, okay, they're not going to be able to run on us. We just have to

double DK Metcalf. Watch out for that stupid Hollister and those little crosses and then don't fall asleep with TJ Lockett put Spine Wilson and try to get a lead early and make it so that

that's it just put the heat on I just don't know how good this Packers team is I've been I've never seen them play four good quarters. Always seems like they're good for about a half. All the advanced metrics

on them all say that they should have won like nine and a half, ten games and somehow won 13. You know what's weird though about them? They haven't lost in a while. They win ugly, but their last loss was a bad loss to San Francisco. It was like seven weeks ago. Right.

Um, and the Ravens are the only other ones in the boat. That boat are still alive. 49ers lost to the Falcons. Minnesota obviously had their trouble last two games. Tennessee lost to new Orleans, Houston, right? They lost while they didn't play their starters. They lost the last week. I don't know.

I'm not ruling green Bay out. They, they could smack them up here. So if you had to say one of these four games is a blowout, which one would you pick? I'm going to say KC Houston. And you know why? Because I'm looking at the coaches. I'm like, who's the worst coach here? There's not an absolute worst coach, but I think O'Brien's luck runs out here. I think O'Brien's offended that you don't consider him to be a worst coach, but I think O'Brien's luck runs out here. I think O'Brien's offended that you don't consider him to be a worst coach. All right.

I'm sorry. I take it back. O'Brien's like, why are you giving me so much credit? I'm terrible. He somehow has won the division like four to five years. I've fallen behind by double digits in my last two home playoff games. What are you talking about? Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Before we do Parent Corner, from a gambling standpoint, I had an interesting situation today where I had a couple teases and the Saints just had to win by, I had the Saints teased to minus two in a couple different ways. You made the right call. You were probably a coin toss away

from winning both ways. I middled it for half of what I was going to win with the just Saints winning by two. So the Vikes were plus seven and a half. Let's call it what it is. You were about to win $50,000 and then you put 25 that, no, it wasn't them. So I'm rooting for basically a close game and I'm getting it. And then the Saints score at the end and I win the Vikings plus 7.5

bet so I have now won one half as soon as it goes to overtime you won the plus 7.5 for sure and then I freeze and I don't tell you going into the overtime I just want out I've already won my money on this Vikings 7.5 I just want out

give me another whatever on the Vikings to I just want out. I've already won my money on this Viking seven half. I just want out. Give me, give me another, whatever on the Vikings to win an overtime. And that way I will definitely not lose money. And guess what? I didn't do it. You know, it's interesting. Put this in your book.

You would've, I know you're right. You would've gotten plus money. The saints lose the toss, right? They lose the toss. The Vikings are getting ball. The saints may not touch the ball and ultimately didn't.

And the Vikings were plus 120. It's like, how do we not do that? We should have jumped on that. Of course, the team that may not have to give the ball over should win. The best man at my wedding, Jeff Gallo, huge Vikings fan. He's been on this pod before. What a gamut of

emotions for him during that game. Oh, yeah. And it got to the point where heading to overtime, he's just assuming this is going to be the worst Vikings loss of all time of the last three years since they seem to have one every couple of years. And then he was more impressed and excited that they won the toss than any other part of the game

couldn't believe it he's like oh my god we won the overtime toss yeah that's so un-vikings and then for cousins to come through but then to have to get stuffed twice and then have this touchdown in the end zone to win the game that all of a sudden seems like it's going to be reviewed and then that would have been the all-time classic Vikings loss where the touchdown gets overturned. They kick a field goal and then the Saints score a touchdown. They lose on the correctly interpreted bogus pass interference call, whatever. So anyway. Well, I'm happy for Gallo and I apologize to Stefan Diggs.

I know he wanted his team to lose, so he could have made a point. Stefan Diggs. What are you going to do? He should be a character on Friday Night Tykes to show my son watches where everyone just flips out on each other. He might be. He might be coaching one of those teams.

Cousins just has to be like, how did I get into this? Yeah. All right. We're going to take a break. Then we'll do Parent Corner. As always, Parent Corner is brought to you by CarMax.com where you can explore 50,000 CarMax certified vehicles

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And there you go. CarMax. Check it out. We'll talk about them in one second. Let's do parent corner. Sal, you have the floor. All right. So let me start by saying my middle kid's a little quirky 12 year

old boy but really wasn't meant to be a middle child we're looking for new schools for him for uh for middle school we think he needs smaller classes i don't want to get into it too much but you know he'll probably need a little more attention so he doesn't want to get uh swallowed up in like a big junior high school, middle school. So we, uh, we take them out and we, he does an interview. They interview him first, the intake person, then we have to be interviewed. And so when we go in the first thing, the woman asked me, she's like, so Jack told me about the two of you, me and my wife. And it's like, and you, she looks at me and says, you are a gambler who is on TV. I was like, oh, wait a minute.

She's like, do you care to explain yourself? I really felt like I was on the stand. Thank God. This is a few good men. So I explained myself. I get to a point where I think she's okay with it and she should be whatever. I'm making a living talking about gambling on TV and on the podcast and everything else. So that's okay.

But you could tell he's just a little upset anyway, or a little confused about what the hell I do for a living. All right, fast forward to this Patriots game. Now, I know you want the Patriots to win. I'm actually okay with them losing 14-13 because I have them on an adjusted line parlay. I have the Bills plus nine already in, Patriots plus three and a half. I adjusted that a little more. So 1413 is fine. I'm really okay with that. And it's looking like it's going to be 1413. And in addition to that, on locking in, I go up against Todd Furman and Clay Travis and Clay's big bet. And if this doesn't hit, I win the week. His big bet is the Titans over 19 and a half points. Okay.

Which in the second half, you're not even going to sniff a touch. It's like nothing even close to 19 and a half. So even if they go 17, 13, I lose my adjusted line parlay, but I'll win the week. Unlock it in. And then that miracle punt goes down to the one. So then the punt's in the air and you're like, hey, where's the kick return? Oh my God.

And I'm like, there's no kick return in this. And now I know. Now we're going to see 47 laterals and it's going to end up in the Patriots end zone. I'm going to lose. No, no laterals. Just one terrible pit, whatever, bounced off the receiver into the hands.

And I scream. And I'm pretty good. I know you think I'm bad, but I'm, first of all, most of the losses are like in Corolla's warehouse. I'm watching, I can run to a different room and let out my emotions. Um, or if it's the Cowboys, you know, the, the, the, you know, the, what do you, what do you call it? The, uh, blood diamond game was very upsetting. There's a few others, but I let out three solid, loud, scary, blood-curdling F-curses in a row, running throughout the house and locked myself in my office.

And here comes our middle child, 12-year-old. He's like, what happened? We lost everything, didn't we? Dad lost everything, didn't we? And mom's like, no like no no no dad just didn't want clay to win and clay had 20 points because of that touchdown and he was no we lost everything he's like he's arguing with her he's worried that we lost everything i then have to have a conversation with him like this is it this is rock bottom for me he thinks i'm a loser and i

know he's gonna go telling people that we we lost everything Saturday night. And we did lose almost everything, by the way. Not everything. There's some left. On that parlay. So that's it. I had to have a talk with him. And then my oldest one is like, this is why you don't bet the Patriots. Why couldn't we just enjoy the end of the dynasty?

You have to now lose money and everything else. So that's my parent corner. I have a very bad problem. Gambling problem. So the Patriots one more time cost you money. They that's my parent corner. I have a very bad problem. Gambling problem. So the Patriots one more time cost you money. They won more time. Yeah, that was it. Danny back to it came full circle.

The Rams Super Bowl was the first time they really stuck it to you. You're right. Shit. Yep. There should be a chapter in your book. Yeah, I know. I'm just, uh, I'm over 19 and a half points. Come on.

That's, that doesn't, that's awful too. What the hell? Also, wasn't that, it was an awful play by Ben Watson, Gronk's replacement. Was it? Was that him off, who had bounced off him? I thought that was him. Yeah. Maybe.

So he was supposed to start all the lateraling. I don't know what that, what was the design there? I, what if the lady during the interview had said to you, your son tells me that you're a terrible gambler. Would that have been more offensive or accurate?

I think that would have been bad because then she would have been like, how are you going to pay for this school? Yeah, I know. I don't know. I should just go to her and tell her, look, we're out. He's going to public school. This is it. Well, speaking of degenerate 12-year-olds, my son, he was still on break this week. He's finally, thankfully, going back to school.

Got a skateboard for Christmas that he's been on every day. And it's just a matter of time before some sort of terrible injury happens. But he also got some Amazon gift certificates for Christmas because he still has one, two, three. He's got five grandparents still alive and decided to go on amazon and make an order the backstory is we banned him from playing video games because he was playing this game madden ko which is part of the madden where it's like this ko it's it's basically like playoff overtime and you're going back and forth against whoever and he's been playing all the time and he gets really upset when he just throws tantrums

when things go wrong. And we would just hear him screaming in whatever room he'd be playing the game in and all of us had it. So we took his controllers. One of which was broken pretty badly. The other one, like one of the buttons didn't work. So he decides he goes on Amazon to buy two controllers,

but they're not for him because he's not allowed to play anymore. He's buying them for me. That's where he started. He said, dad, I bought you new controllers. I don't need a new controller. Well, you might need them. I'm like, I know these are for you. I'm not an idiot.

So then the full Amazon order comes in today, actually. And there's more than just boxes for the controllers. Here is his entire Amazon order. Two controllers. Oh, no. He bought a fancy headset that allows him to talk to whatever

weirdo on the internet he's playing the game in. A new iPhone case, which is apparently made by Bape. He said this is important. What's Bape, Kyle? Is that bad? It's like an expensive brand. You could say streetwear or something.

What is that, Babe? B-A-B-E? B-A-P-E. Oh, B-A. All right, now here's where it gets really good. He bought himself MMA gloves. You are in trouble. Because he's been thinking about MMA, and he's's doing moves and he wants to wear the gloves.

He's been watching the videos on YouTube. Nice. And he thought it was time maybe to get some gloves. You're not going to believe this, but he put them on today and just started beating the hell out of me. So that's going to go great. That's going to lead to my first child abuse case. Yeah. We're not done yet.

He bought the world's largest gummy hot dog. What? Apparently there's this hot dog made out of gummy bear. And my daughter said he wanted to buy the world's largest gummy bear, but it was too expensive. And the world's largest gummy hot dog sold me $15. So he bought that. And then last but not least, he bought himself an MVP trophy.

Okay, so why did he do this? And this was like a $50 trophy. For our fantasy league? No. That would have been a great, great thing. He plays football on the trampoline. He brings fantasy league? No. That would have been a great thing. He plays football on the trampoline. He brings the football in there.

He plays hip-hop videos. And he pretends he's in the NFL playoffs and throws the ball and dives and jumps and has these whole long games in the trampoline. And he decided at the end he needed a trophy

because he wanted to accept the trophy after these games. He wanted to have a trophy presentation. Wow. That's great. So now he is in the trampoline for an hour. By the way,

he's in amazing shape from this freaking trampoline. And finishes whatever bizarre one-man football game is happening. And then presents himself the backyard trophy. Were you watching it? Was it a big ceremony? I haven't seen it. He just explained it to us why he needed an MVP trophy. Now, was there a chance that he lost and would not present himself with the trophy?

So I don't know if the other side of this imaginary one-person game, if that side wins, whether that person gets a trophy. He didn't explain that part to me. So to recap, two dual whatever controllers for the PS4, a headset, a bait-by-phone case, MMA gloves, the world's largest gummy bear hot dog, and an MVP trophy. Those were his Christmas presents to himself. That's great. I don't know. I think it should have been an MVP trophy for being the MVP of Parent Corner this season because he really took it to another level.

He's a winner. He's completely insane. I would say the over-under on when he punches either me or Kyle in the balls accidentally with his MMA gloves on. Yeah. I wouldn't be, yeah. The trophy presentation's fine.

You just need, you can't have him have the gloves on. That's great. We were watching the Pats yesterday and Ben is just out of control and he's yelling and Kyle turns to him and goes, Ben, I am so tired of your voice. 12 yearold boys.

You're asking for trouble, Kyle. That last year before puberty. There's no way to get a trophy. That last year before puberty, they really go off the rails. And then all of a sudden, they're going to, you know, nine months from now, they're just going to disappear in a haze of 45-minute showers and locked bedroom, whatever the hell is going to go on. That's good. But for now, we have one-man trampoline football games and MVP trophies and kids thinking that their dad has lost everything on one gambling game.

Yeah, that's right. Yeah, he won't be wearing those MMA gloves in the shower when he goes through puberty. That's for sure. Yeah, we're a mess. We're in trouble here. All right. Well, that was it for Paracorder don't forget at CarMax the price is based

on the car not your negotiating skills there's never any haggling or pressure to buy just ask Kyle that's how he ended up with Maxine

the new love of his life CarMax has Kyle covered with a 7 day money back guarantee he had a full week to make sure every little thing about the Mustang

that he got was just the way he liked it. He decided it was. He also had a limited warranty, which covered the vehicle's major systems for 90 days and 4,000 miles. And then he also got the max care service plan for additional coverage. You could be the next person who's as happy as Kyle is with vaccine. Just go to carmax.com and explore 50,000 CarMax certified vehicles nationwide to get started.

Cuz, what do you have to plug this week? I don't know. Lock it in 430 to 530 Eastern on FS1. Jimmy Kimmel Live is back every weeknight on ABC 1135. And against all odds, we're going to go over all four playoff games and pick winners. Is Clay, Clay's in Tennessee,ennessee right yeah he is nashville yeah so what's he going to be like this week it's terrible like bonetta says i'm like we have to root for the patriots and she's like no no no it'll be fun to keep it going i was like no this is going to be unbearable unbearable with with this shithead

sorry so i'm gonna wear headphones i think the whole week every time he speaks titans texans Unbearable. Unbearable with this shithead. Sorry. I'm going to wear headphones, I think, the whole week, every time he speaks. Titans, Texans, Vikings, or Seahawks, what underdog do you feel the best about, money line-wise? I hate to say it, but the Titans. Yeah, I agree. Damn. How did this happen?

I agree. We know four favorites aren't winning. Right. So it's only a matter of time. All right, cuz. First podcast in 2020. Good job by you. Good job by you! All right. Thanks to ZipCruiter. Thanks to Sal.

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Visit ladderlife.com slash BS. Ladder, two Ds, life.com slash BS. Back on this feed two more times this week. And don't forget about the rewatchables and the book of basketball as well. A lot of podcasts for you this week. Sorry. I'd like to give you great content every once in a while.

Until then. I don't have feelings with them. On the wayside, on the way so I never say I don't have feelings with them.