The Bill Simmons Podcast - Aziz Ansari on 'Master of None,' Hosting 'SNL,' and Kanye Studio Session Stories (Ep. 212)

Episode Date: May 12, 2017

HBO and The Ringer's Bill Simmons is joined by Emmy Award–winning comedian Aziz Ansari to discuss shooting the second season of 'Master of None' in Italy (5:00), taking intense Italian lessons (15:00), directing modern Woody Allen moments (24:00), improvising scenes in auditions (29:30), hosting 'SNL' for the first time (33:00), stand-up at the Comedy Cellar (38:00), living outside the internet outrage cycle (43:00), working with Lorne Michaels (48:00), the untimely passing of Harris Wittels (53:45), shooting the 'Otis' video with Kanye and Jay Z (1:04:00), listening to Kanye albums before their release (1:08:00), Kanye and Jay's humorous side (1:12:00), the first time meeting Dave Chappelle (1:19:00), and the 'Girls' series finale internet controversy (1:25:00). Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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souse but you might enjoy the podcast anyway anyway larry wilmore and cousins out check those podcasts out we're also brought to you by the ringer.com i actually wrote a piece uh with a whole bunch of ringer staffers this week about the last uh second season of billions so if you love billions i would check out that piece we covered all the angles all right coming up aziz ansari here we go Aziz Ansari, part one. Part one. How are you? I haven't seen season two yet.

Yeah, you were supposed to get it. The second part of this, I will have seen it. So we'll do part one. The irony is I had nothing to watch the last couple days. I just had to watch the same Billions episode four times. Oh my God. So I'm catching you early, pre-promotional fatigue oh my god yeah you just do a ton of interviews and you tell the same things yeah a bunch of times a bunch of anecdotes

i want to become like what's his name like uh like kendrick lamar and develop a reputation for being press shy oh pressure is good yeah it's a good corner for you kendrick lamar's press shy i want to i want people to say that about me. Aziz Ansari's Press Shy. No, I just do everything people ask. Louie's done a good job of, he doles it out. He tries to keep interview mystery. Yeah. Why can't we do that, Melissa?

Yeah, what about interview mystery, Melissa? Melissa's part of the evil cabal of people that make me do every podcast. She's deep on her iPhone. No. She's probably signing me up for some kid's podcast tomorrow. He has 100 listeners. You really should do it. I mean, you don't have to do it, but, you know, Emmy voters might be listening.

I'm just saying. Master or none, you did a lot. Master or none. You had to. I your friend totally joking i don't mind i i i don't do a ton of stuff i'll you know i i'm very excited to sit down here i've heard your podcast before and we have a lot of mutual friends yeah a lot of mutual friends and and look i uh you created it with a red sox fan alan yang he's a red sox fan i don't know anything about his yeah they play baseball in boston yeah I don't know anything about his. Yeah, they play baseball in Boston. Yeah, yeah. I don't know about his preferences that much.

He's a Red Sox fan? He talks about sports like Mike Schur and those guys. And my brother. It's like this whole little side lingo thing. And they're talking OVP. All these different crazy baseball stats. Red Sox fans are a lot. And we're in much better moods these days

because we've won three World Series in nine years. Oh, okay, that's good. If you tried to create the show with Alan, if we had never won the World Series, it would have been a much darker show. There probably would have been a murder in episode nine. Alan's a pretty upbeat guy. I'm telling you.

You know, Alan is the, here's some mild bit of sports information I know. Alan broke both Achilles heels. Tore both Achilles heels. Oh, tore both of his Achilles? Like playing basketball? Yeah. He tore the first one because he was playing basketball,

and a racquetball randomly just went into the basketball court, nailed his Achilles heel, tore his Achilles heel. And then he had a walker, and it was a very long ordeal. Alan is the most upbeat, you know, always sees the bright side of things kind of guy. But this was very hard to see this because what happened was he then, a couple of years later, the other one tore when he was playing basketball. And he said, like, I could feel it. I felt like it's happening again.

I think the only two people, he said his doctor was like, it's you and Kobe Bryant that tore both Achilles. Seriously? Yeah. I mean, there's other people, I'm sure, somewhere, but that's a pretty rare injury. Double Achilles. Have you heard of that, Tate?

Tearing both Achilles heels separately. Jesus. Yeah, so he's not really hitting the courts as much i don't think but how'd your life change after you won the emmy after i won the emmy well people refer to me as emmy award winner aziz ansari that's that's probably the biggest change that was very it was a very fun night and it was cool to get recognized like that you know we made the show and we thought it was good. I don't think either of us anticipated the level of reception we got. It was such a, it's so nice when you put everything

into something, like really put your heart into it and, and for it to be received well is a great feeling. And, uh, you know, winning an Emmy was cool. It was something I didn't expect to happen. I hung out with your brother that night. My brother? Yeah. He's the best. Yeah, he was taking credit for everything. He's our number one joke man, I'm telling you.

You watch season two and if you pick certain jokes, I'm sure he had a hand in them. Him and Alan were both kind of shell-shocked. Shell-shocked by the Emmy thing? Yeah, that night. There was a shell-shocking. Well, Alan had a speech ready, so he couldn't have been that shell shocked.

Well, I think he was prepared. He was, yeah. I was not, and luckily didn't get a chance to say anything anyway. That's right. I forgot about that. What was so bad

was I was literally just going to, so for people that didn't see it, Alan spoke and said a hilarious, great speech, and then I was going to go on and say, I was literally going to go on and say this. I was literally going to thank my parents and then dedicate the award to our friend Harris Whittles that passed away.

That's all I was going to say. I just want to thank my parents and dedicate this to our friend Harris Whittles who passed away when we were writing this series. They cut the mic. So were you mad? Was there any point over the next five days where you got mad about it seemed a little crazy that they couldn't let me even speak for two seconds but what is there to get mad about what alan said was a hilarious great speech and we won the award so it doesn't

be mad about were you mad when moonlight took the cut the mic like confusion thing to a whole other level with the oscars yeah that was that was bad that was a different level of of uh mix up that was pretty bad they for kimmel though he now goes down for posterity as the host of the oscars i was trying to explain it to him three days later he didn't totally see it he is the best man i always see him in the backstage of those things and i you know and i'm about to like run some bit i'm like hey man like what do you think you know he's i was just emailing with him today because he loves pizza right and uh i love pizza and he has a pizza oven and i have a pizza oven and we're just like emailing about like pizza pizza oven yeah he takes it very seriously he loves pizza and he loves making pizza.

So we email each other about like really nerdy shit. Like, where are you getting your tomatoes from? Really? I was like, where are you getting your tomatoes from? One of his best friends is like the best pizza guy in Phoenix. So I think that got him. And now he knows how to make the Bianco pizzas. Yeah, he told me he took like 29 lessons with the guy, which is very respectable. Yeah. And now he knows how to make the Bianco pizzas. Yeah. He told me he took like 29 lessons with the guy,

which is very respectable. Yeah. Uh, I was in Tokyo. I was living in Japan for a few months earlier this year. And there, the pizza is incredible because these guys have went to, this one guy went to Naples and like learned how to make Neapolitan style pizza.

Then he went back to, um, he went back to Tokyo and opened up a Neapolitan-style pizza. Then he went back to Tokyo and opened up a Neapolitan-style pizza place in Tokyo and kind of applied the Japanese work ethic towards making pizza. And then now he has all these disciples that are opening up all sorts of pizzas.

So there's this huge pizza renaissance in Tokyo, and it's some of the best pizza in the world, some of the best pizza I've ever had. And I was emailing him, I was like, you've got to get to Japan and eat this pizza. Oh, he's probably going to go in like a week. He gets super competitive if other people have had pizza. Welcome to the podcast, rich assholes.

I was in Tokyo eating pizza. Well, it seems like you do a lot of traveling, though. I like getting away. You know, whenever I finished season one, at the end of season one, my character goes to Italy to learn how to make pasta. So after season one aired in November, in January, I took three weeks of intense Italian lessons. And then I moved to this small town called Modena. Intense Italian lessons? Yeah, two hours a day.

What is that? Just people screaming Italian at you? Under high pressure situations? Yes, it's intense. They put a big rock on you, and then you have to yell for help in Italian. Just figure it out. Come on. Aiutami!

We'll take it off you now. No, this woman would come, and would do like two hours a day. Because my thinking was basically this. I was like, I probably waste about an hour, minimum two hours probably on internet every day. So I dedicated that time to learning a skill like a language in over three weeks. That time would not have been lost. It's not time I would have been doing anything productive. I probably would have wasted time on the internet or whatever.

So I did that and then I was not great but I was shaky but I went to this town called Modena and I lived there. I went there by myself, made friends there

and I worked in some You soloed? Yeah, which was very scary for me but I wanted to kind of do what the character was doing so I could see what that experience is like

to kind of go somewhere and not know anyone. It was kind of a weird, it was weird because it was i was doing it for the show and for research for the show but it ended up being a very good thing for me and a very uh it was really uh it was a really amazing experience for me so whenever i finished season two i was like i want to do that again just kind of live somewhere else and it's kind of nice to just get away from New York and uh you know I if I'm there I just kind of I fall into a pattern of this going you fall into a pattern anywhere right you end up eating at the same places seeing the same people doing the same stuff so it's kind of nice to just kind of put yourself

in a different environment and I was writing and so I I I like the idea of being somewhere else when I'm writing away from kind of the distractions of New York and everything. And then just the cultural experience of kind of just living somewhere else and getting to know the culture. I love Japan. I've been there a few times, but I'd never spent like a long time there. So I tried to learn Japanese a little bit and then I stayed there for a few months. And it was really good for the writing and everything because. Well, you know why?

Why? Because when you're a writer, it's good to get knocked out of your element and be uncomfortable yes i write the best on airplanes i get so much done on a six hour flight when there's just chaos and people walking around it's uncomfortable and you're just kind of trapped yeah those are always great especially when there's no wi-fi yeah if i'm writing i have to i have to leave my phone in my yeah leave my phone at home and i have to go to a cafe that i don't know the wi-fi password if i learn the wi-fi password it's done what was because then i'll just start checking shit yeah you have because what happens is this is you know sometimes people like ask me like do you have any advice

this is my advice do this and the reason I think is what happens when I'm writing and tell me if you find this I will hit a point where I like don't know where to go and in those moments I will then be well maybe check my email or check New York Times real quick and then I'll go back to it right but when I don't have my phone and I don't have internet I hit that moment and I'm forced to kind of stay in that moment and when you stay in it you can come out you'll come up with an idea yeah that idea is gone when you when you take the break to go on the moment you're on amazon the moment you're like well let me just see what text i got or

whatever yeah it's it's the worst um i used to call it when i was running grantland i would had like five jobs i used to call going in the bunker i'd be like i'm gonna go right i'm not i'm not checking my email for like five hours. Like don't email me when I'm out. So when I would get out of it, I would always be scared something terrible had happened while I was like not looking at anything. Nothing happens. Nothing happens. There was never one time where I was like, oh, if I had only checked two hours before.

It's kind of amazing how nothing happens. There's this false sense of urgency. Whenever I do Master Gun, whenever we're filming, I never keep my phone on me. And I remember there was one time we were doing season one. There was this whole crazy drama that was happening about the cover of the book. About, like, we're not going to meet some deadline or whatever, right? Yeah. And there were just frantic emails, just all day.

And I opened my phone up at the end of the day and i saw this whole chain of crazy emails huge exclamation points all caps and then at the end it's like all right guys we figured it out we got the deadline pushed and that was all i experienced right now imagine i open that up while we're shooting i'm trying to shoot this show where i'm like acting in everything right couldn't be more required to be present completely to get the job done yeah and then i'm saying they're worrying about this thing then and then you know at the end it's all figured out you're knocked out it's so nice to have it away because it's just it's there we our whole everyone's kind of work atmosphere is creating these false senses of urgency i think and it's taking people out of

being present and doing a good job kimmel's the only person I've ever seen who can do everything all at once. He can answer all emails. He's answering my pizza emails. He's writing jokes. I've gotten emails from him and it's like 5.15 and then I know he starts taping the show at 5.20 or whatever. I'm like, how is he emailing me about this stupid Steve Garvey photo I sent him or something? But yeah, he's just able to. I can't do it.

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All right, back to Aziz. So when you did Mask the first season, when you're creating it, you're creating all the characters and all that stuff. It's just you and Alan, right? And little Harris? No, no, Harris isn't involved. He's not involved yet. Yeah, yeah, he's not. He's not he's not right just my brother my brother is a writer um but in the first season we had it we had the same first season harris whittles yeah yeah yeah harris whittles was around

um so what's the team what's the team heading into year one okay so season one me and alan created the show together right i we were finishing up parks and rec i go to alan i go hey i think we should do a show and alan and i had kind of lightly always talked about doing a show together. You know, it's kind of weird. I don't know if I've ever told Alan this, but I remember, I think I told him, but whenever we first started Parks and Rec. Is this going to be emotional? No, it's not that emotional.

I didn't. I was going to get it. All right. Man, once we get into the Harris stuff, though, you better get them Kleenexes ready. I was supposed to talk to some lady about Harris for like an hour one time. And we got like 10 minutes in. I was like, I can't do this. Oh, for the Guardian piece.

Yeah, it was really hard. Alan talked to her forever. I was like, man, how did you do that? I have a Harris connection that you don't even know about. But we'll do the Master or None thing first. OK, so Master or None. So the thing I was going to say is Alan and I started Parks from the get-go. Yeah.

He was a writer. I was one from the get-go. Yeah. He was a writer. I was one of the actors. And, you know, we were both the kind of young single guys. You know, everyone else was a little bit older, married and whatever. But Alan and I were both about the same age and he really loved food and we just started hanging out and whatever.

But I remember thinking, oh, you know, often when people are on these these shows they find a writer that they get along with and they end up creating their own show together and i was like oh i could see myself doing that with this guy like we get along really well and he's very funny and he's really the best partner yeah you could have because he kind of he's so disciplined he's really hard on stuff he he kind of just we kind of complement each other in really great ways and um you know we decided we were going to do this show together we'd always talk about like let's do some show together where because we were on parks and rec which is filmed in la it's 22 episodes it's so much and we're like let's do 10 episodes and do

it in la i mean i mean in new york. Is the Netflix binge stuff really started yet or no? No. Like that wasn't on your radar? We pitched Master of None to Netflix. The only shows on Netflix were House of Cards and Orange is the New Black. They didn't have anything else. Right.

And then now it's like they have a new show coming out every day. We're on a Netflix show right now. They're filming one. Is there a camera? We're doing press for that show too. It is true. You go to folks and it's like new releases and it's like 17 new things a billion shows it's good for yeah

they still spotlight the the major ones well luckily we got in early and so we got in early you know one of their more uh premiere titles or whatever you want to call it but anyway so so you knew you didn't want to do 22 cause you knew the grind was many. It's, there's no reason for that many episodes of anything. I don't think there needs to be like seven seasons of all these things either. They're, you know,

anyway, so that's different story. But so, so you would take the six season of girls back if you could. I didn't, I, to be honest, I didn't keep watching.

I, I don't watch anything. It just ended. I know. Yeah. Yeah. It's just ended. You know what I did? We'll never know what happens to them. I, I know them. I don't watch anything anymore. It just ended. I know. Yeah, yeah. It just ended. We'll never know what happens to them.

I know them. I know Jenny and Lena. They're so nice. And whenever I run into them, they're very sweet. And, you know, Lena is so nice. Like when I started Mastering, I called her and asked her some stuff. And like, you know, do you think I should direct and things like that? And she was very nice about it.

But everyone in comedy is very nice and very giving. A lot of times, sometimes. Do you ask that question a lot to people? Do you think I should direct? Well, I asked her like, Hey,

like, cause some people were like, Hey man, it's too much to like direct and be in it. Like, or, you know, if you do it,

like do the last block, you know, it's not an easy thing to do, but she was like, you'll be fine. It'll be fine. Um, I can't imagine.

I mean, and I did way more this season than I directed last season. I mean, and I did way more this season. And I directed, last season I directed, first season I directed two. This season I directed four. But one of them was a double episode, so it was really five. And it was a lot. But it was really fun.

And I was way more confident as a director and kind of knew what I was doing a lot more. I could never tell how hard directing was because I'm a huge 90210 fan. And Jason Priestley started directing episodes. i'm a huge 90210 fan and jason priestly started directing episodes i'm like is is he is this easy like or is he like the next orson wells or it's got to be one or the other you know jason watched a lot of uh bergman and antonio and before he went in to do his episodes same as i did in master gun i really did do that as pretentious as it sounds but when when I was in... You dove into the 70s.

You did a lot of that on thing, right? Well, and the first season was watching a lot of, like, the Woody Allen stuff. And it was like, okay, can we do a modern version of this stuff? But then in between the seasons, when I was living in Italy, I'd work in the pasta shop during the day. In the afternoon, I was kind of going to a kind of film school in my apartment. I was just watching all this stuff I hadn't seen. I was watching a lot of Italian cinema because it a kind of film school in my apartment i was just watching all the stuff i hadn't seen i was watching a lot of italian cinema because it seemed kind of appropriate

so i was watching like you know a lot of the you know some of the fellini stuff i hadn't seen or antonioni and you know random things like scenes from marriage uh which you you were mentioning the link later stuff and uh i i got that i watched scenes from marriage because they said when they were writing before midnight they referenced scenes from Marriage, which is really incredible. I'm older than you. How old are you? Me? I'm 34.

So I'm basically the exact same age as Ethan Hawke's character in the trilogy. Oh, wow. That's interesting. It's weird because when I saw the first one, I was just as idealistic about love and all that stuff as the character was in that movie. So you kind of hit the same beat. And then you hit the second one, and it's like, I'm a little jaded now, but I still believe. And then the third one, it's like, love sucks, I hate everything.

Kind of still in the second one. Yeah, I feel like I'm still in the second one. I haven't hit the third one yet. I'm not dark yet. I've been married for a long time. I don't feel like, but I can see the third one. I see the third one coming. This is the key of the third.

No, you can see it. It's a shadow that's looming down but I think that's what's brilliant about it though I'm in the fourth one where he's like by himself just living abroad all the time and avoiding having a life god that's a dark analysis of what I'm doing or you're in the second

and a half one or the first and a half I'm in the I'm in I'm in the i'm in i'm in in the in i mean i'm like right before he got married to the lady i'm about to meet that lady and get divorced um well but i liked what you were saying about um no we're talking about lick later yeah and i was watching scenes from marriage yeah i was watching scenes from marriage but the first season i you Before Sunset's one of my favorite films ever. And I love that kind of very, kind of talking about relationships.

It just felt so real. And I remember reading interviews about like how they would write and things. And one thing they would do that I also read Kubrick did as well, where you would improvise dialogue with the actors and record it. Yeah. You just kind of improvise the scenes and record it and then use those recordings to kind of write your script. And so I would do that a lot.

I did it a lot with Eric in the second season, especially I did it even in the first season, I would do it like with Noel a lot. And then the second season, I was like, that really worked. It helps the dialogue feel a little more natural. So I did it a lot with Eric. I did it a ton with Alessandra, who plays the love interest in season two.

We spent a lot of time doing that and it was very helpful. So I read one thing from a while back when you talked about that and I was fascinated by how you did it. Because I've always been fascinated by how they did the Ethan Hawke, Julie Delpy, all that stuff. And it sounds like the same process. So they put them in positions in scenes? I would just say. Fake scenes and they just go? No, real scenes.

Like, okay, so I would just go... Whenever we auditioned a Sounders character, we did improv. I would just say, like, okay... Well, like in the first season. You're making pizza at Jimmy Kimmel's house. The first season, right? The very first scene is a condom breaks

and we have to decide if we're going to get a pill, right? And so we wrote one version and then I just wanted to know, I was like, hey, let's just improvise this. Let's treat this like this is real. Like let's just play it very real. And she made choices that were interesting and more interesting than what we'd just written. And so I used that to rewrite the script and we did that with a bunch of things.

So she makes the choices, you go back, you rewrite it, and then she goes back and she acts off the lines you gave or does she still improv at that point well no it's kind of like we so i it's improv written and then it's scripted we would do it like okay so i would uh you know if the scene is like uh let's say it's that scene with the condom right yeah so i said all right no well let's just do that scene and we both just kind of make the choice to play it very real not go for jokes at all and just play very real something funny happens great but it's really just about playing it very real and treating it like a real situation to get very natural a performance and so we would then improvise it

and we would do that like a few times and then i would go back and remember okay which bits were really funny or which things were really interesting that we landed on. We would, you know, sometimes I might say, okay, this time you don't care that it's broken and you just want to keep going again and I'm very nervous. Or, you know, this time you're nervous and, you know, we would try and then just kind of see, you just do a bunch and you kind of see what feels right and use that to kind of, all of those, I mean, this is at least what I do. I don't know what those other guys do, but that's what I would do.

I would just do a bunch of things. Are you getting feedback from anybody? Like is Alan saying use take two, use take eight? No, I just do that with the actors. I kind of just do that by myself. And it's not a rigorous thing. It's like you just kind of feel what feels right. And you remember, oh, that thing when you said that, that was funny.

We should try to put that in. And then we read it again and just see like, okay, this feels pretty natural. And we hit the right beats and it's not too long or too short or whatever. How similar is that to what like Curb Your Enthusiasm does? Because it seems like they put them. I don't know what they do. It seems like he puts them in structure. They ad-lib, but there's some sort of structure with it.

I think they ad-lib while they're on set. I mean, this is like almost like kind of rehearsals that we would do, you know? And I think that's closer to what uh link later and what i've read about so what happens if you cast somebody who's not good at improvving everybody we cast you're like the big rule big roles part of the audition is like an improvised scene noelle's audition she did a thing where uh um we uh we just improvised that kind of breaking thing and And in Lena's audition, we did an improv about some scene that was in one of the episodes. So everyone that we cast in the big parts,

they're comfortable with that. Claire Danes? Claire Danes we didn't do that with. You just kind of trust her because she's Claire Danes? She's a legend and just handled everything. She's good. Her stuff, we didn't do that kind of improv. I don't do that with every scene or anything it's only with like certain scenes that are really for whatever reason lend

themselves to that process you know so it's not another reason why this couldn't have been 22 episodes you would have had you would have been like completely you told me how to do 22 episodes of master not i'd be like i can't do it i'm quitting i can't so when you sold the idea to netflix they were just like yeah we'll do 10 we'll put them up all at the same time what did they tell you well we pitched it

around everywhere and everyone was into it they liked the idea of just you know some sort of Aziz show and Netflix was the only one

that was like don't worry about doing a pilot or anything 10 episodes let's do it and this was before Netflix was like you know

really doing a lot of original programming but I knew them from doing the stand up specials with them And this was before Netflix was really doing a lot of original programming. But I knew them from doing the stand-up specials with them. And it just seemed like where things were headed. I would not have guessed it would be as crazy as it is right now. But God, it's been years since then. What are we talking, like 2014 or early 2015? It may have been 2014, I guess.

Yeah, you were early. We were really early. I think you should, you were early. We're really early. I mean, I remember when we did the meeting. I think you should brag about this more. Whenever we did the meeting, there was just a poster for Orange is the New Black and one for House of the Cards. It's all they had. I think when you do the- And Lily Hammer.

And Lily Hammer. An American gangster? In Norway? How do we all know Lily Hammer? Everyone that knows Lily hammer is losing it on the list of the pockets like this motherfucker's coming in with the lily hammer jokes i like it and then there's other people like what lily hammer gets gets lost in that first wave brag more about seeing the future of netflix and streaming content a super, super prescient thing to see.

No, before, as you're doing your season two promotion, you'd be like, look, I looked at the landscape and I just felt like, I remember I said to Alan, the sun was shining on us and I was like,

this is where it's going, man. We got to get in now. I had no clue. We are cowboys. It was fun though. We, yeah, we were in there pretty early. But by the time the show came out, they had other things, too,

because we took a while before it came out, because we ended up getting another season of Parks and Rec. And so we did the half season of Parks and Rec, and then we started making the show. But during that whole time, Alan and I would have talks and things, and we came up with a few scripts and ideas before we even officially started writing. We came up with the Parents episode and the Claire Danes episode,

the one that's called The Other Man. And, yeah. So, we were still talking. You know, Alan and I, even when we're not working on a show, we're always, the show's always in the back of our minds and we kind of talk about things.

Like, in between season one and season two, we kind of talked about, we'd just kind of talk on the phone, like maybe an hour or so and just kind of, like, what would be something exciting to do in Master of None? Because it was the first time we kind of knew on the phone, like maybe an hour or so and just kind of, like what would be something exciting to do in Master of None? Because it was the first time

we kind of knew we had the show and what it was and everything, so. Do you have an end game? Like some people going to this are like, this is six seasons

and I'm out and I know how it ends. I mean, I might be two and out. I don't know. Yeah. I always like when people say they know how it ends. There's no way

they actually know how it ends. I don't know how it ends. You know, I was texting with Alan the other day because we were watching the girls thing and oh, what I was going to say know how it ends. I don't know how it ends. You know, I was texting with Alan the other day because we were watching the girls thing and oh, what I was going to say

about girls is, so I don't watch any shows. I don't. And the only thing I watch, I watch Game of Thrones but I don't watch any comedy stuff because it feels like,

it feels strange. It's like if you were, you know, if you were, if you made coffee tables and then you went home and watched a show about a guy

making a coffee table. It's not, it doesn't feel, it's not, I don't get the same thing out of it um wait i don't understand why it's just like it feels like it's like a doctor watching er yeah i guess my coffee table analogy no no because my stepmother i was always a pain in the ass pretty clear bill my stepmother was a doctor you couldn't watch er were there because she was just like oh no it's not like that because i'm not like oh i'm not like watching the show and criticizing it it just you just yeah it's a different feeling yeah i got you so uh but uh i just i was curious what they did at the end you know because i know that's it must be a big moment for them and

you know i know them a little bit and uh so i watch i just saw the previously on for and and i saw the previously on and and and i saw the previously on and then i fast forwarded to see what the very last shot was so i just saw it was a very weird way to watch the show i was like what the hell's happening she's dating an asian guy why you got a black baby what happened in the show there's too much diversity here i remember when it was just four white girls now she's got a black baby one guy a girl's dating an Asian guy they went too far it is true the first season they were just like

two white two white two white it was about four white girls in New York City so I called Alan I was like what's up with that baby and he was like well she starts dating Riz Ahmed and it's his baby and I was like I don't know man neither me or Anis were that brown.

We were full Indians. Riz is from where? Do you know him? I never met him. I don't know him, but he was great on The Night Of, which you probably didn't see. I watched an episode of it. I thought he was good.

That one was really good. That was a good one. He had a nice little HBO run. Dude, that guy's in everything, man. He was good. Let's get Aziz in some of those parts. I didn't get to even audition for some of that. That's what's annoying, man.

Sometimes, you know, him, Dev Patel, all respect, but at least let me audition for him. You can't even call me to just read for the thing. Lying. Just give him one call. I could have just went in and read. I didn't even get to read for it. A cup of coffee.

I can't play serious? You've seen the show. It's a dramedy. It's drama scenes as well. Take out the comedy. Imagine that. That's Aziz and Lion. It's fine.

See, Melissa, this is going well. You were worried. I knew it would be fine. He was like, you haven't seen the show yet. We're not going to be able to do this. Well, it's different if you haven't seen the series. Now we're just talking about random stuff. But anyway.

Yeah. Yeah, I never get, I didn't, what are the big Depp Patel movies? I never got to audition for Lion. I didn't audition for. Well, the big one was Slumdog. Slumdog, I didn't audition. What's the other one? The Life of Pi.

That's not Depp Patel, but they didn't even call me. There's like five Indian guys that are major Indian actors. You're like, you're not going to see me? You're not going to give me a shot? You're not just, let's not, guys, we don't have 10 minutes to let Aziz read. What are the chances he could possibly pull this off? He's only been on eight seasons of television. Right.

Wow. You guys think I'm doing a bit. I'm just serious. No, I don't think you're doing a bit. You listening, Sharon? It's my agent. She's like, I tried, Aziz. How do you do...

You know, they wanted to get... How do you do... How do you work on your stand-up if you're also working on the show? Does it have to be one or the other? I don't. I don't do any stand-up when I'm doing a show. It's impossible. I'd be doing the working on the show do you have to be one or the other i don't i don't do any stand-up when i'm doing a show it's impossible i'd be doing i'd be doing the show

the show you know i'm the first you know i'm there uh from like you know six seven in the morning till seven eight at night so if i did that and then when i did stand-up afterwards i'd go crazy it's too much but whenever the last time i did stand-up was when i did the snl monologue yeah and for that that i really did more stand-up than i'd ever done because so i had uh what does that mean like a lot of like you kept going like five six seven weeks practicing the material well i only had i had a month so i finished master of none season two finished shooting yeah and uh i finished season two and i stayed because i wanted to so i i directed episodes nine and ten and last week you know we were only supposed to shoot till like before thanksgiving but

because we did episode nine as a double episode and um because of some extra time that was involved in pulling off the italy episodes it um it took uh it took us all the way to basically like before Christmas, like mid-December. Yeah. And so we finished shooting and I was like, you know what? I want to edit my cut of the episode 9 and 10 before I leave and send it to those guys as a, you know, kind of a Christmas present. Like, here you go. I finished my cuts. And so I stayed and edited the episodes

and I finished like kind of right before Christmas holiday. And I was like, wow, I'm like kind of done for a while. This was great. And it was the hardest I worked on anything I've ever done. I'm going to go to Japan and eat pizza. Not quite yet. Okay. I still had to come back and edit in January, February.

But I was done for a while. And I was like, I didn't know what I was going to do. But I was like, I'm going to go somewhere for Christmas, just somewhere and do something. And then I'm not even exaggerating. The night of that, when I finished the cut, I went to some Christmas party, and I ran into one of the people in the talent department at SNL. She's like, I've been trying to get you all day. We want to have you host. And I was like, oh my God.

You never hosted, right? I'd never hosted. And as a comedian, as a New Yorker. That's a pretty big invitation. That was always been. Yeah. And you know, as someone that's been in New York, you always go to the show and you go.

Oh yeah. You know, when friends host and things like that. So it was something I'd always really wanted to do. And I, you know, of course I was like, oh that. So it was something I'd always really wanted to do. And I, you know, of course I was like, oh yes, I forget everything else I planned. I'm going to do this. Yeah, you're doing this.

But I was like, okay, it's a month from now. It's a day after the inauguration. I haven't done any standup. I've read something about Chappelle talking to Louis like before he did that snow. And I had a run in with him as well at the Comedy Cellar. That was a really crazy month of stand-up comedy because Chappelle was dropping in, Louie was dropping in, Rock was dropping in.

Everyone was working on stuff. So you would go to the Cellar. I mean, there was one thing. They wrote a whole New York Times article about it where it was Seinfeld, Rock, me, Schumer, and Chappelle. And it was really crazy. But there's so many nights where it was like someone would go to the Comedy Cellar and it'd be like me, Louie, Rock.appelle. And it was really crazy. But there's so many nights where it was like, someone would go to the comedy cellar

and it'd be like, me, Louis Rock. Like, that happened all the time. But they'd have no idea. They'd just go in the seat. But that night when they wrote the New York Times, that was the craziest thing I'd ever seen. Even as a comedian, you know, I was like, this is crazy.

It was really crazy. Does it foster like a little one-ups, Chip? Or are people just so happy to be there that they're not even thinking you want to i i think you don't want to look back look if rock is there and he's like hey man what are you working on for snl like i want him to see it and be like this is good right you know but so i had a month to like get this set ready and i knew it was going to be so i saw louis and i was like all right man what, what do I do? How do I do this? How do I pull this off? And he said, all right, this will be the stand-up set.

No one will watch any stand-up set you do more than this. This will be your most watched stand-up set you've ever done. And he said, you don't try to write a set for this. Just do your best stuff, and you'll be fine. And I said, Louie louis i have no stuff i've been shooting my show all my stuff is in my last special and he's like oh well you need to be here all the time and i was like yeah i know that's my plan yeah and so i just i had never went so hard so you went whirlwind i did i would do like so the comedy cellar has three rooms they have the main kind of room that you've seen like in louis or whatever and then they have these two little satellite rooms one one is like a little

bigger version of the comedy cellar another one is kind of this kind of lounge kind of thing it's a little weird and they the comedy cellar had all these shows for holidays so they would do three shows a night in all those rooms and i would just do do as many as I could. I would do like, I would do eight, 10 a night, just like running back and forth. Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. I came to LA and I did the same thing at the comedy store. I was here for a few days and I would go boom, boom, boom, just, just go one after another at the comedy store. Like someone would just grab me and like, all right, quick, quick, quick, quick. And I would just do all the rooms. And the key, any standup that's, you know, that you're trying to get really good, the key to it is just repetition.

Just like finding little new moments, running it over and over, trying different things. And it's very inspiring to see guys like Rock or Louie or whoever who have that same level of dedication. I mean, Rock, he's on tour right now. You would not believe how hard he worked on that tour. You would not believe it. I mean, he's had, he could have done that tour whenever,

but he worked so hard to get it to the level it is now and would just keep doing sets. It seemed like his was personal too, right? Yeah, I mean, I haven't had a chance to see the show yet, but I'm sure it's excellent. He worked so hard on it. But anyway, so I was like, all right, I'm going to make this set really good.

And I knew it was going to be a big stand-up set because it's the day after the inauguration. Right. And it's tricky because you don't know what, it's a huge spot

and you don't know what's going to happen because it's so, it's so weird. I mean, the day before was the inauguration, right? I mean,

everyone was just so down. I mean, on that set. Yeah. I'd never been there. It was like something truly awful had happened. Everyone was so sad. It wasn't even like something truly on that set. Yeah. I'd never been there. It was like something truly awful had happened. Everyone was so sad.

It wasn't even like something truly awful had happened. Yeah. Something truly awful had happened. Honestly, I could, it was, yeah. But. Yeah. It was so bad. And everyone was down.

I was like, oh my God, like what's going to happen here? And then the next day, that women's march just boosted everyone's spirits. And I changed a few things because of that. I had to change it the day of because everyone's mood was totally different that day. But that said, I worked on it. And again, there was a time where after I'd been working on it like two weeks,

if you're like, Aziz, you have to do SNL tomorrow. I could have done something that probably been fine. But I kept working, working, working, working to just keep, I probably wrote about maybe 30 minutes of material and then pulled it down to that eight. That was like the best stuff. But, you know, I was constantly like talking to Rock and would send him files of things.

He was super nice and very helpful. And, you know, he sent me a text that I will never forget. I did a set early on and I was like, yeah, I'm going to keep pushing and try to just beat this stuff. And he was like, look, it's the day after the inauguration you're doing the monologue be big seize the moment and that really inspired me to like work really hard just that idea of like be big seize the moment you know it's it's always amazing how you always hear like rock and Seinfeld and Louis CK all these guys there's there's like a community of stand-ups that,

and I even see it with Jeff Ross, or you see it sometimes when a comedian dies and everybody rallies. It's a community that, Ross and I have talked about it. I don't even know what you would compare it to. It's like you're all bonded by something about that gig and doing things and some of the scars you have and how hard it is.

It's a very specific subculture. Yeah. You only have each other to talk about it. Look, if I do an arena tour, who am I going to talk to? There's only so few people. Before I did, I think at some point I was doing an arena thing. I texted Kevin. I was like, hey, man like do you have a sex talk

he's like sure you know like but it's not cutthroat it seems like you guys are all you everyone's rooting for each other it's not like oh that guy got this and that girl got that I don't know any of the people that are mean man I mean you know like if you know everyone

calls everyone and asks them about things you know Rock was trying to get his, like, stage set up. He was like, you know, what did you do for years? Like, do you know people I can talk to? It's like, no one is like, I don't know, man. I don't know if I can give you my guy. You know? So I'd be like, what the fuck do you mean?

Right. Sorry, Hannibal. I can't tell you any tips on becoming a theater act. Fuck you. And now Netflix is blowing out the market for stand-up comedy. I mean, it's insane. They have like an evil monopoly now. Jesus.

That place is evil, man. They just throw the cash around. It's a good thing for you. Well, I didn't get anything like those checks. I didn't get the Chappelle check. I got the Aziz check, which is a great check. It's a great check. Chappelle check I got the Aziz check which is a great check it's a great check

the Chappelle rock checks are a little bigger one more break to talk about Blue Apron or as my son calls them Blue Apron because he loves eating Blue Apron but it's really called Blue Apron what if you stopped wasting money on expensive takeout orders what if you signed up with Blue Apron for less than $10 per meal Blue Apron. Don't listen to him. What if you stopped wasting money on expensive takeout orders? What if you signed up with Blue Apron?

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I wish Joe House was here, beef teriyaki stir fry with sugar snap peas and lime rice, baked spinach and egg flatbread with sautéed asparagus and lemon aioli, three cheese and baby broccoli stromboli with tomato and oregano, I can't speak, oregano dipping sauce and crispy salmon and roasted potato salad with pickled mustard seeds and creme fraiche sauce creme fraiche creme fraiche creme fraiche they always throw in one thing i

can't pronounce they know i can't read right now you can get your first three Blue Apron meals for free with free shipping. Just go to blueapron.com slash BS. Do not go to Blue Apron. Go to blueapron.com slash BS. Blue Apron. A better way to cook. Back to Aziz. Have you found that doing stand-up and

I hate this question, but I always find myself asking it whenever I have somebody to stand up. In 2017, how uptight everybody is with everything and the coyotes that come after you. Not you, but just anyone on social media. Oh, they said this and everybody comes at you. Does that scare you at all? I'm off the grid on that stuff. Okay.

And if you're off the grid and you don't know about it or don't engage with it, it doesn't exist really. Good way to handle it. Not everyone can do that. I'm happy to have a conversation with somebody in person about anything. But a lot of that stuff is people taking things out of context and just not having a thoughtful discussion about something. Grabbing like a tiny excerpt and blowing it out. Yeah. I mean, I've seen it with other people's stuff, my stuff, whatever. And it's, I don't know. discussion about something grabbing like a tiny excerpt and blowing it out yeah i mean i you know

i've seen it with other people's stuff my stuff whatever and it's i don't know it's not a i kind of got off i kind of i'm pretty off the internet stuff uh because i just started realizing even like the new even like new york times sometimes i'm like i'm reading this trump stuff i'm like what am i reading these like reading wrestling rumors or something. It just doesn't even seem real anymore. It's this kind of cycle of, he just said this crazy thing. Two days later, still hasn't apologized. Some other people are saying it's pretty fucked up. Then it's like the third day, it's like, all right, it kind of said he's sorry, but not

really. And that cycle, how many times can you read that cycle before you're like, I don't know if this is really making me a smarter person. I don't know if I'm learning or becoming more aware of something in the world. I think I'm just following this weird soap opera that it's just strange. You're right. It is like a four-day cycle. This is why I muted.

I still like Twitter because I get news from it, but I muted everybody on my feed who talks politics. Oh, really? Yeah. And it's a much nicer life. You know, I. It really is. A few years ago i unfollowed everyone on twitter and instagram i took them both off my phone and i remember at

one time i was like wow i'm really gonna not know what people are up to or whatever and it's fine then after okay oh wow you realize like oh i don't i don't need to know in this stuff it doesn't affect me to not know it trump it's like oh we might get in a war with north korea like i'd like to know that oh as it's happening that's going down yeah it's like is this going down now i'm in japan eating pizza we have a submarine over there yeah this sounds bad like i'd like to know that but for the most part like the four-day cycle of trump said this yeah can you believe it you know that's why would he say really, I really happy about master of done. The second season is that everything was written before he got elected and

there's no mention of him at all in the whole series. And I feel like he's so mad and everything. He's got to be pissed. Yeah. It's like, really? I'm not in the season two. Yeah.

There's yeah. It's, it's, I feel like he's so omnipresent in every piece of culture now that it's it's nice we were able to make something he's kind of ruined saturday night live for me so i've been watching saturday night live since 1975 and this is the first year that i don't totally care if i watch it because i'm like i just i can't do trump anymore you're having trump fatigue yeah oh it's beyond fatigue's like, what's worse than fatigue?

PTSD? I don't even know. It's overload. It's something. And I can't discern between Al Baldwin and Trump anymore. When Al Baldwin's doing the imitation, I don't even know. I can't even tell the difference.

I don't even want to talk about it right now. I don't even. Yeah, let's not even talk about it. I'm like, I'm getting fatigued about you talking about the fatigue. This is where Tate's going to throw in a commercial. It's like, I get it, Bill. You talked about how there's so much of it around on every medium for a long time. What was the hardest? There's people with Trump fatigue like, no, Bill.

Yeah, literally, we have Trump fatigue from this conversation. What was the hardest thing about hosting SNL? The thing you didn't expect. For me, I am very used to being in control of everything. Yeah. And there you really

have to trust them. It's their show. They're dressing you. And yeah, they're literally pulling your pants off and putting new pants on yeah it was very fun and silly but i was like okay aziz don't go in here and try to control everything let them do their thing and i feel like i did that in a good way and didn't um overstep any boundaries but it was such a delight because um you know sarah schneider who's one of the head writers she writes on master or none and it was cool to like be there when she is there and other people i know from the cast and stuff um and they were all just so nice and they're always really um nice comedians that host i think they like when comedians host and stuff and um so it was really fun do your imitation of lauren

interacting with you and do Lauren's voice. I mean, that just seems like a setup to do something mean to that guy. Why? But everybody who deals with Lauren, they love him and they all imitate his voice somehow. I have so much respect for that guy. And he's like such a legend to me. And just like he... I've always been fascinated by him. I've been so fascinated.

Oh, you do what? I did a pod in his office it's probably my number one favorite pod I ever did I mean he's fucking Lorne Michaels he's also great he's also great at telling all those stories I loved him

yeah you know what he said that was really funny he's very funny so they have this dinner right you go and uh and some of the cast and writers come and i i was just very nervous right like my whole thing with doing the show is like i don't even want the show to be good as much as I just want them to be like, Aziz was great. Let's have him back.

I just wanted to end that week and then be like, you know what? We should have Aziz back sometime. That's all I wanted, you know? And I wanted the show to be good, but you know what I mean? So I was very nervous at times.

And so we're at this dinner and it's Lorne, Cass and writers. And you know, I can be a pretty quiet guy sometimes. Yeah. I'm very shy at times, you know? and so i'm sitting there and i'm not really saying much at this dinner you know i'm just saying little things here and there and whatever but i'm generally pretty quiet and then lauren goes uh i can't know if i do even do it you don't have to do the voice but he goes uh he goes uh hey you don't you know what I don't like about Aziz?

What did he say? You know what I hate about Aziz is he's always on. It was so funny. I just laughed so hard. Because I wasn't saying anything. You'd be like, this is the guy that's going to host? The quiet guy that's just staring at the bread? He's the host?

It was so funny. I butchered his joke, but it was really funny. So you think you earned an invite, a return invite at some point? Oh, I don't know. I mean, I hope so. It was one of my favorite things I've ever gotten to do,

so I hope I get to do it again. That's great. Did you, you grew up in, you grew up in South Carolina, but then you, when'd you move to New York? Or when'd you start living in New York? I went to New York in 2000 to go to college.

When did you start doing stand-up? Summer of 2001. Oh. So yeah, SNL goes on the radar pretty early. The first place I ever did stand-up was at the Comedy Cellar. First place I ever did stand-up was at the Comedy Cellar. And I remember I used to go

I used to go there, just watch. And one of the first times I went, Chris Rock dropped in. I don't even know if I ever told him this story. He dropped in and he just tanked. Like he was working on new stuff. He tanked. And I was like, wow, this is really cool. That's cool that you watched him fail. This is this art form. Yeah. That you're the best guy, one of the best guys that's ever done this,

and you can still have an awful night. That's a very amazing art form. It's like baseball. You can go for four. Hey, you can play baseball, you can go for four. You can go for four every day. Anyway, rock tanked. It was cool.

But, no. I'm sure baseball's cool. But he, I remember seeing him that night. But what was really cool was they were like, we have a special guest. And then you didn't know who was going to come. And they're like, Chris Rock. And I was like, what like i was this little kid it was like you know i'd been in south carolina knew every word to his specials never in a million years thought i would ever see him in a tiny club like

that yeah and could you imagine if you went up to that aziz and told him, hey, one day you're going to drop in and people are going to go nuts. That would have fucking made my head explode. I mean, I said this before, like to me, like when I did the garden, people were like, is this a garden like a big deal? I was like, yes, it's a big deal. But I think some reporter followed me when I was like working on the material and I dropped in like that. Yeah. the material and i dropped in like that yeah and i told her you know like doing the garden's great but honestly like the coolest thing to me is that i get to be one of these people that drop in at the comedy cellar that's like such an honor they only let a few people do that and you know when

you get to that point where you can go to any comedy place and they just want you to get on stage that's amazing because when you're a young comic all you want to do is get on stage that's you're you you would hope you get one spot that was good like a good spot like at nine o'clock on a thursday or you know or god if you get a weekend where there's a good energetic crowd and i remember going to the comic book seller just being crazy crowds all the time they were so good and now it's like oh i owe it to that young aziz to take advantage of that that privilege i have and use that as much as i can when i'm working on stuff and get up as much as i can and make my stuff as good as it can

be because i have this huge advantage that i you know to be able to go up like that so you're how far you went from another stand-up special? Oh, God, forever, man. Forever. I don't know. I haven't even started writing yet. You wrote with Young Aziz. You just said.

Oh, no. No, I owe it to the other Aziz that wants to direct and write more to work on that for a bit. The battle of the two Azizes. Yeah. You want to hear my Harris story? Whittles.

Yes, please. Yeah, you don't have a story about my cousin Harris. No. Yeah, I have a story about my cousin Harris no yeah a little story I wrote for Jimmy when he did the American Music Awards like two or three years in a row one year Jeff did it

God what show does Kimmel not host this is why he was good at the Oscars he hosted like a kajillion shows he was hosting roasts and all that stuff

but then one year he needed a writer and jeff couldn't do it and sarah was friends with harris and he jimmy was dating sarah she's like so harris comes in and he like barely says anything for like you know we're there the whole day on we had a writing thing and then the day of and he's just this quiet guy and i'm like what the fuck like wow like this is I can't believe you listen to Sarah in this like this guy and then he started sneaking him in and then it was like I get it yeah and it was just like these little thingers so fast forward to we're doing Grandland like 2011 and he starts to humble brag um Twitter account, which I thought was brilliant. And I loved it.

Very funny. And I can't remember if it came either. It came out that he was doing it or I found out that he was doing it. And I emailed him and I was like, you're the fucking humble brag guy. Cause he hadn't said who it was yet. And so then we started emailing. And when we did grant one the first month he was gonna be he was gonna be on great one every month doing the humble brag prowl rankings

oh yeah it's like the third week i think the second or third week you did do that right you didn't we did okay yeah i remember that yeah i think he did like eight or nine months in a row and it was like the the funniest things we ran every time it was like just great and then all of a sudden he went off the grid. And I didn't know he was having personal issues at that point. But it was like, hey, man, you're going to write. No response. Hey, what's going on?

Nothing. Yeah. And then it was like, well, Harris ghosted us. And I was like, that's weird. And then he comes back and he wrote like two more. I think two or three more. And then that was it. And then I knew after that I knew about the problems he had.

Anyway. So he died so then i think like two weeks later his brother-in-law emailed us and said harris bequeathed all of his wrestling figures to grantland and he gave us all of his wrestling figures whoa and then he also said he something about he had baseball cards and he's like harris wanted to build it you know do about he had baseball cards and he's like harris wanted to build it you know do you want the baseball cards and i'm like yeah so i have harris's baseball cards and the wrestling figures which we had at grantland i'm not sure what happened to because i got bounced but yeah that's yeah you know i uh does that sound like harris because it seems most of the people i know who knew him said that sounded like a Harris move.

Sorry. I'm just like, it's so hard to think about all that stuff. When you mention resin figures, it just brought up a really dark memory. How involved was he in season one this is weird when someone gets sad on a podcast because it's quiet and you're like but the good thing is it's a podcast we can edit it if it if you want to take a break or anything um yeah um how involved was he in season one yeah so whenever we got the show uh he was the first person i wanted to be a writer on it i had written a couple of movies with him that never got made

but they were always it was always so funny to read him he was my he was my favorite comedy writer my favorite just like just as far as it like jokes. It seems like he was everybody's favorite who worked with him. He was just, you would be in a room. I mean, I, my last memory of him was when we were working on Master of None when he passed. Yeah. And he, he, God, man. Why you gotta go down this path, Bill? You know this is gonna happen.

No, I didn't. You wanna get them tears for the blisters? No, no, no. We're not taping this. You knew this would happen. I had to tell you the wrestling figure story. How do I not tell you that? I haven't told anybody that.

That triggered a dark memory for me man no um it's fine um one of my last memories with him was we were sitting in the room and we were just like just it was near the end of the day and we're kind of tired and we're trying to figure out this one joke and i think harris was on his phone i created some you know i tried mastering on the writer's room i say hey don't keep your phones on. Like, don't check your phone. Put your phone in a drawer over there. Harris would just keep his phone. He didn't care.

Because he knew he was Harris. He's so good. Yeah. So I was like so tired. I was like, Harris, figure out this joke. And he just looks up and he says something. That was like the funniest thing. I was like, you're the best.

I just put it in. But he was there. Wasn't he supposed to be on the show he was gonna play one of my friends and oh god uh he was so excited he was so excited to act he really wanted to be an actor and um he was very excited i mean you know you know, he was moving to New York. We're going to, it was, yeah, we'd almost finished writing by the time he passed and it was right before we were about to go to New York and we're going to do some more writing in New York and then start filming.

And he, damn it. All right. What if you edited it and it sounded like I didn't get said? I was like, anyway, so he took out all the bosses inside. I won't. We won't edit it. Sorry, listeners.

He was our other, you know, whenever me and Alan weren't around, he was running the room. And he was someone we just trusted so much. He would only come in like three days a week because he was doing treatment. He was really fighting this thing. He was really open about it too. He was very open about it. And I was just so naive about it. I thought, well, he's getting treatment.

Everything should be fine. He wants to, you know, stop and he's getting, he's really being aggressive about the rehab. So I didn't think, I never thought something like what happened could have happened. I could not have been more shocked when I got that call. It really seemed to come out of nowhere. But he was, you know, he was a huge voice in the show. He, you know, a lot of your, you know of what would have been your favorite jokes in the first season were lines he came up with or moments he came up with. And he was pretty much there for the writing of most of it except for the last few, I think, after he passed.

We finished those. But, oh, God, it's a hard thing. He was one of those guys. He was one of those guys. he's one of those guys, you know, you have friends who are like, I should see that guy more often. He was always one of those friends for me.

Right. And we'd see each other and have a blast and then he's like, I should hang out with Harris more. And I just never did. Yeah. And I'd see him every now and then

and he'd live not far away from me. But we were working together so much. We were working together on the show and we'd work together on some scripts so I'd always see him i'd see him at parks and but yeah he was a he was a really incredible talent and uh it's not hyperbole the stuff people say about him it's all true all right i'm glad we talked about him yes i'm gonna leave in all the pauses yeah Yeah, whatever you want. It's a legitimate kind of... It's fine.

Yeah, I know it's all fine. But yeah, I'm sorry. I had to tell you the wrestling figure story. What else can we talk about? We're at the hour mark. Whatever you want. We said this was going to be a half hour. And now we've doubled it.

I like doing podcasts. This is a very long... It's an interesting conversation. And it's kind of the antithesis of what I was talking about earlier. About the kind of Twitter stuff where it's an interesting conversation and it's it's it's it's kind of the antithesis of what i was talking about earlier about the kind of twitter stuff where it's taking things out of context right it's actually a long you know thoughtful discussion when you do the when you do like the late night shows and stuff and it's like seven minutes that's fun in its own way in a different way and you know now i've done those things so much it's

so different now because i remember when i first did those shows i was so nervous and you know first one i did was kimmel kimmel was the first person that had me on a show and i i was so you know nervous and like had all my stories and like it was this tightly thing and now i've done those so many times i know these guys all pretty well at different levels and i mean you brought your dad on a show once what was that colbert yeah i brought my dad on colbert that was very fun um It was like two segments. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, he had a lot of fun. That was fun.

Yeah. And yeah, it's so different now doing those shows. But that's a different thing. You know, I enjoy, I wish I could have a long commerce racing like this with Conan. That'd be really fun. Did you ever think about hosting a talk show? You know, I would love to do a thing like this

and just talk to interesting people, but I don't have time. You know, you only have so much time. So you've thought about hosting a podcast, not a talk show? I mean, just some sort of thing where I talk to people. I enjoy just talking and I'm very curious about people

and different people who do different things than me. But you don't have any kids. No. So you should be enjoying this. Enjoying what? Well, because every time you have a kid, you lose like 15% of your potential productivity. Oof.

And if you have two, you're operating at like 70%. Sometimes I'm just like living my life and I'm like, what if I had a kid right now? Oh shit, where would I, I would just be at such a bad dash. I'm never around. God, I'd be bad. See you son, I'm going to Japan for two months to eat

pizza and write. Gotta get away from everything. Too many people asking for selfies. See you kid. Here's your nanny. Here's your check for the month. Bye. I'm going to Italy. Can I come? No.

I'm going alone. Yeah. Yeah, I think you've carved out a non-kid life. Yeah, I got to figure something out. I can't keep doing this, but I enjoy doing it now. It does help me write. You know what I've realized? It's kind of like, you know how you come up with ideas in the shower?

This is like taking my whole life and putting it in the shower. By living in different places. It's putting my whole life in the shower., you come up with ideas in the shower. This is like taking my whole life and putting it in the shower. By living in different places. It's putting my whole life in the shower. So I come up with different stuff. Were you actually friends with Kanye? Or is that like a... No. You know, I used to know him pretty well.

You know, I don't see him as... It's just like anybody else. I don't think anyone sees him now. Him and Jay-Z. Once they got married and had kids, I never see him anymore. But, yeah, I used to... How did I first meet him he saw some bit I did

and then he came to a show I did at Largo and then he came to Largo yeah he came to Largo in LA and Cunt is the most fascinating celebrity Tommy's nodding he's probably

I don't think there's any way to get a handle on him or describe him or what his passions are. He's such an interesting person. There's this whole view of him that some people have of him. I don't know. He is that. He's also a nice guy that I've met.

He came when I did Carnegie Hall. He can be a very sweet guy. But he's very... The most interesting thing that I experienced when I was... There was a time when I did the Kanye-Jay-Z video, when I was in Otis, right? Yeah. That's a big IMDb credit.

It's cool. It's pretty good. That was when I knew him and and jay-z the the most when i would see them a lot i just kept seeing them all the time in new york we would just go jay-z's like into food i don't know people even know that but he's really into food and so like i would just see him we would get dinner sometimes like eating at like cool restaurants like right and and uh then i started going when they're recording watch the throne so i was there for a lot of the Watch the Throne recording,

which is one of the coolest things I've ever gotten to see. Yeah. Just as a creative person to see how those two guys were making this thing creatively. I mean, it's one of the most iconic albums of this century. Yes. And I was sitting there listening to, like, I had Paris and songs like that stuck in my head like months before they came out because they would just play it all the time and like you know it was so cool to be a to be a part of it and so i think that's why they asked me to be in that video and spike jones

directed it who's you know i know him and we're friends and so that's why they asked me to do that that's how i ended up in that thing and uh so but yeah it was so fascinating to see them work with each other you know when kanye was on set of that video and he's like he's like you know i bought a ticket for a jay-z tour not long ago right and now i'm in a video with jay-z and and you know we made an album together i think that's why that album is special because it caught them at the perfect points of their career and it's also good he He put out that and Twisted Fantasy. Yeah. Same here.

I remember one time me and my brother went. He was in some studio. Not far from here. There's a studio somewhere here. And he played us all the lights, and that was the coolest thing. Sometimes I would see him, and he would just be like, yeah, I've been working on this. And he would just play all the lights, and he'd be like,

holy shit. Oh, my God. People are going, I've been working on this. And he would just play like all the lights and he'd be like, Oh my God, people are going to go crazy when they hear this. You know, that's amazing. One time when I played, I played gorgeous from, from twisted fantasy.

And I was like, Holy shit. They forgot about two things. My black balls. It's like, damn, that's good. Hurry up. You love this. This might be tate's favorite podcast moment ever you just you know i one day when i just heard all of yeezus i was like holy

fucking shit i heard like a long version of yeezus before he like whittled it down with rick rudman i heard it like a really long version. I mean, he does this. Like, Rock and all these guys have stories like this appearing in this stuff. And he plays this. You know, one time this was so fascinating. He's working on Twisted Fantasy.

And there's a guy comes in. He's got two vintage Hermes suitcases. Yeah. Travel suitcases. And he's, first off,

he's like trying to pick which suitcase. And he has like one of, he's like trying to pick which suitcase. And he has like one of his guys. He's like, yo, grab that one and like walk around with a little bit. All right, grab the other one. He's like, see which one looks cooler to walk around with. And he picks one. And then the guy's still there.

He's like from some delivery service. And he's like, hey, I want to play you something. Tell me which of these you like. And he's like, hey, I want to play you something. Tell me which of these you like. And he played them. And I was like, wow. It made me realize how much to value someone's opinion. Everybody's opinion is very interesting to have. Yeah.

And especially when we do Master of None, we screen the episodes and theaters when we're editing. Because it helps. Because you're the craziest person to watch and judge this thing because you've been living in it and when you wrote it and created it and filmed it and everything you're so you're too familiar when you're in too deep in a way that no one that watches the show will ever be so it's valuable to get these other people's opinions but i thought it was so fascinating he asked that guy what he thought about it um yeah see i want that kanye back and not the kanye who's like doing fashion stuff i mean

more power to him and i'm sure it clears his brain but i do i kind of miss the old kanye yeah yeah um but wow it's pretty you know it's so crazy to think about um you know how much you know think about rap tours before kanye no one had a fucking visual show before Kanye. The Drake tours and stuff, all those things, those are really all that stuff. He's the one that designed what, you know, arena rap is, you know, had a huge impact. I'm buying Kanye's stock. It's a little cheaper now. I'm buying all of it.

I haven't seen him in a while. He's brewing on something. Something will happen. He'll be back. You know, look, I know there's all those other stories, but during that period, it was, you know. Well, that Watch the Throne thing, that's amazing. That was the coolest thing.

You'd be like telling your grandkids about that. That was really cool. There was one time. Push her in Otis. There was one time they like, we were sitting in, so when they say like live at the Mercer they were really at the Mercer

there was in a room and we were just hanging out in the room and they had like it was like this it was like this setup there was a little white dude

on a computer the guy when he goes when he says what did he say on what's the song that's like this is something

like the what's the song called what's that song but that's not the name of the song that's like, this is something like the Holocaust. What's the song called? What's that song, Tate? But that's not the name of the song. That's just what I said. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Who Gonna Stop Me?

Yeah. When he goes, extend the beat, Noah. Noah's you. There's you. There's Noah. He's sitting at the, you know, he's the engineer. And it's just like them and, you know, this guy. And we were just sitting there, and we were watching some basketball game or something. And I looked at Jay-Z, and he was just kind of like,

this is one of the few times I've been known to watch sports. Right. So we were watching this basketball game, and Jay-Z's just kind of staring off. And then he taps like, taps Kanye. And he's like, very quickly whispers this rap. This is one of the raps in the song. And he'd just come up with it while he was, and it was long and so complicated.

It ended up being in another album. But he just whispered this. They were going to do a song called Living So Italian, which is weirdly all my stuff and they couldn't clear the sample or something but jay-z had a verse that he came up for it with there and it ended up being on another jay-z song on the the magna carta album um but he's like uh uh you know the one that's like um i'm just looking at some kid in here who's clearly a big jay-z kanye fan and is loving these stories uh he had uh he he

said the rap that's like uh something it's the one that like references de niro and and all the stuff it's in magna carta um but he just spit it all so quickly and and and i just looked and I was like, man, you're really good at this. You're right. And we all just laughed so loud. We would just, you know what people don't realize? Like, those dudes just love to laugh and they're very loved, just inspired by creativity. And, you know, there's a whole side of these people that you don't get to see, you know? Yeah. I mean, I think people know, like,ay-z's like a pretty you know he loves to laugh and he's like he's a very funny guy um but those were it was you know i was this is so

crazy you know i was you know when we're shooting that video he said kanye said that thing to me i was like dude i uh you know i'm a say i'm an indian kid from bennettsville south carolina and i'm in the biggest rap video. Why am I here? One of the most bizarre asterisks in my career. But, you know, that was just a cool time to just kind of be around these guys who were being so creative. And I was the biggest fan of this stuff. I mean, Twisted Fantasy, Watch the Throne, that was the time to be friends with Kanye.

That was a great time to be going to the studio and just hearing insanely good stuff. Was Kim around then? I don't even remember. No, it was before all that. It was before. I mean, I'm not saying like... Yeah, no, I got you.

I tried to get you in trouble. She banned me. She was right after Watch the Throne. That was Chris Humphries. Oh, yeah. She was in the Chris Humphries stage. No, but I saw him around like during Yeezus. I didn't hear any...

Life of Pablo was the first time since graduation that i heard a kanyam without hearing any of it before so this was really interesting because before i would i would go in i'd see him and he'd play like one time he uh he he was i i just he was like hey i'm leaving soon but if you want to meet me in in the uh in the lobby of the mercer oh we'll have a tea or something. He didn't say we'll have a tea. He's like, he's coming to the... Tea. Yo, man, roll up to the Mercer. We'll have a tea real quick.

He didn't say that. He was like, just come meet me in the lobby of the Mercer. Yeah. And he was like, I just came up with a song called New Slaves. And he played the beat on his laptop. Bum, bum, bum, bum, bum. And then he just rapped the whole song

for me, right in the middle of the Mercer. And he's just sitting there, I'm about to wild the fuck out, I'm going by me. And there's like someone eating eggs. They say we're the new slaves. Beaver's like, okay. Anyway, we'll have

the Eggs Benedict. This should be a podcast of, I always feel like comedians, rappers, athletes, they all like intersect because they're all fans of one another. And then like, just these interactions lead to all these funny stories. That should just be a podcast. People are very nice to comedians. What other celebrities have just said, hey, will you just come hang out with us because I'm a fan of yours?

You just meet randomly. You just run into them. You just meet. I mean, name someone. I'll tell you if I've randomly run into them or whatever. Name someone, Tommy. Do you just meet people? Michael Jordan.

Michael Jordan I've never run into. I don't think he leaves his house anymore. He lives not far. He lives in North Carolina sometimes. LeBron must have happened. LeBron, okay, LeBron, one time at the Comedy Cellar, he came with the full starting lineup of the Heat. Oh, really?

So I was at the Comedy Cellar, and so I said, hey, some guys might come to see the show. Do we have room for them? And then, you know, the manager's like, yeah, how many? I was like, oh, maybe like two or three guys. And then they're like, yeah, yeah, we'll just squeeze them in the back.

And I was like, yeah, one of them's pretty big. I was like, it'll be fine. Then the full starting heat, like him, D-Wade, everyone comes and they just, they stand in the back and there's this huge group of dudes just in the corner and i just did like you know like a 20 minute set and it was a great time you know i i mean i i would imagine people were just turning around going wait a second this is some tall guys wait a second yeah that LeBron James those are some tall guys wait a second yeah but yeah

people are just nice comedians and they like going to shows and stuff alright we're wrapping up when does season 2 come out? that guy's like what I want to hear some I want to hear a Drake story

we're at like the 120 mark oh let's do a Drake story alright quickly Drake quickly Drake and then we'll wrap up alright let's see a Chappelle story? yeah Chappelle story?

Do you have somewhere to go? I'm sitting here. I was thinking about you. Alright, Drake and then Chappelle. I don't have anything else to do. I'm just here doing press. I didn't make any plans. Wait, so a Drake story?

Let's do Drake first. Wait, don't want to hear it? I don't know if I have any good crazy story. He's very sweet guy. All right, we'll do Chappelle then. Well, Drake's, I don't have a crazy Chappelle story. Well, I'll just tell you his stories because they're boring. You just edit them out. Because we got enough stuff.

So Drake, when did I meet him? I met him like early on. You know, my brother was on to Drake before anybody. Yeah. And he had told me about Drake and then I met him like early on. Because he was on to Drake before anybody. He had told me about Drake, and then I met him early on. Because he was a Degrassi High fan? No, I just knew about him early on with the mixtapes and stuff, even before So Far Gone or whatever.

But yeah, I'm a fan. I was like, oh, me too, whatever. And we kind of became friends that way. And then, oh, God, this is so ridiculous. Okay, well, two stories. One story was he was in Chicago, and he was like, hey, man, I'm in Chicago. I saw you doing a show. Can I come?

Sold out show at the Vic Theater or something in Chicago. I'm like, yeah, sure. How many tickets do you need? 14. Oh, my God. how many tickets you need 14 oh my god it's like um that's a lot man uh 13 i said like hey man can you figure this out it's i told my tour manager like he figured this out straight and then my uh my tour manager talks his tour manager's like yep uh all right so we figured it out yeah i was like well yeah and let him know if he wants to come backstage.

And then they're like, how many backstage passes do you need? And his tour manager's like, 14. The barber can't go home. He's got to come backstage. I don't know if Drake travels with his barber. Kanye travels with his barber. He definitely travels with his barber.

Ivan. Who does? His name is Ivan. The guy's name is Ivan. Who does? His name is Iben. The guy's name is Iben. The barber? His name's Iben. You Google and look at Kanye's crew or whatever, Iben comes up. One time I went, I was like, hey, he's like, hey, I got to play some tracks.

I open the door and he's in there getting his hair cut. I'm like, what is he doing? He's like, get my hair cut. And I was like, this guy that's around all the time? He's your friend slash barber? Because I didn't know he was his barber. So imagine you're hanging out with me all the time, and there's one guy that's always around.

And then one day, that guy's cutting my hair. You thought it was his roommate or something. I just thought it was his friend. Yeah. I mean, he is his friend, but he's also Barbara. That's funny. It's so crazy. Yeah.

All right. What another, what was it? What do you want? Another Drake thing? The Chappelle stories are nothing crazy. I'm trying to think of anything silly that happened with us. The first time I met him, I remember I was really young. I just won.

There used to be a comedy festival in Aspen, and I just won like young comedian, best guy. Best young guy. Yeah, and then like Chappelle was there, and he just dropped in on some show and was just doing a set, and it's like everyone was just enraptured. It was just one of those like random Chappelle sets that are just so captivating.

And I saw him at some party. I was like, man man like i just got some award saying i'm like this is a good comedian then i see you do that set i want to throw this in the trash he's like oh you'll be all right man and i was like what you know when i was talking about comedy a little bit and uh his advice for me which was very good advice was he was like be very he's like be comfortable with silence that's very amazing advice to give to people. He is probably the best at that. Yeah, it's incredible advice. Yeah, he loves it.

Lots of him or Tal or someone there, they don't care at all. It's very good advice. That's a good one. Yeah. You just got silent because you said that. Yeah, you use the silence. Very comfortable. You use the silence to emphasize the point of silence yeah he's so good

man i mean whenever that night when all of us went up you know he went on at the he went on the very end because first of all so he gets the hammer like chapelle doing like 15 right he's gonna go along so so you know when we were like coming up with the order or whatever we were like yeah like dave will go last and uh he went on at the end, and it was great. He just, you know, and me and Rock were sitting at the side, and Rock is always in awe of him. Yeah. And Rock is like, you know, I can write a good joke, but that is something else. And I think it's true.

He's very, very good. But he's always doing, he's very very good but he's always doing he's very dedicated to the art form this dude's doing stand up all the time he's always touring he's always been touring for years now he's just been always doing hours always like on the road

he's so dedicated to the craft do you think you're the last generation of stand up comics who do it the way that it's been done these last 40, 50 years? I don't think anyone's doing anything different now. I mean, look, here's the difference. I wonder if the internet generation that's growing up that got able to get jokes off on Twitter, all that stuff, does that change it? I don't know what you can do because the financial model of it is still, if you put out your jokes before they're in a special,

if someone comes to use you live, they're going they're gonna be like well i've heard this stuff so you kind of still have to have that model of like i'm gonna tour all this material and then put it out on a special or whatever and then you know maybe write new stuff someone might be like well i'm still gonna do also i don't know but um i mean i don't i don't notice i don't also don't know any of the younger people now. Like, I'm weirdly, like, one of the older people. Like, you know, even, like, you know, when I was coming up, like, Hannibal was the young guy. You know, Hannibal. I remember when I did a show in Chicago. It was, like, a 300-seat theater.

And someone was like, you know, this guy Hannibal that lives in Chicago is very funny. And I was like, let's have him open. And he opened, and he was great. But it was such a different Hannibal he was you know he was like he you know he was very quiet and like he you know he hadn't really found his delivery and stuff and then like I remember just watching Hannibal grow and just seeing like you know how he just developed this huge stage presence and just like, you know, was just so much more emotional on stage. It was so different than what the young guy saw in Chicago, you know? So what do you think it is, mid-30s when you totally figured out earlier?

Or it depends on the comic. I didn't figure out anything. I mean, even if I did the, I was just thinking the other day, like even if I did the Master or None episodes that we just are about to put out, I would do them a little differently because I've gotten better in some way. I mean, because I made that stuff, but you're never done. I mean, you know, the stand-ups that I did on SNL I was pretty happy with, but yeah, I still don't know if I've done a special.

I don't know if I've done the Aziz special that I want to be like the special that i have good news netflix just offered 40 million dollars for it 28 28 million they went straight to dev patel they didn't even they didn't ask me is there they're seeing if riz Ahmed can do stand-up he's such a good actor why couldn't he he fathered lena dunham's baby fathered lena dunham's black baby fathered lena dunham's black baby the baby was neither of us that dark that was a dark baby but also it's like all right so what are they supposed to do right like let's say let's say you're the internet person who's like that's so fucked up

all right so they gotta go on a baby scouting are you ever tried to cast a baby right hue they're not a lot of babies that are in the game so you're gonna try to catch so it's like all right we're okay we need to we need to find a baby that's half pakistani half lena lena lena's jewish white i don't think she's jewish i don't know what she is yeah so you need to find half pakistani half white baby that wants to break into showbiz you can't find it so you can use this black baby

he's like hey I'm in I'm right here the black baby's just sitting there like hey man you go look for that you look for that half Pakistani

half white baby you'll come back to me that's how it always goes I'm the black baby that's everything that was my favorite internet that's one internet That was my favorite internet. That's one internet controversy I wasn't aware of.

Because I Googled it because I was very curious. I was like, wait, so why does she have a black baby? Oh, that was an internet controversy? I didn't know that either. I Googled it afterwards because I was confused. People are upset about the baby? Well, some people were like, why is it? And then someone was like, it's not even a black baby.

Oh. Because I almost got involved in the controversy. Baby truth. Fucking Aziz was on the podcast. It's a black baby. It's not a black baby. i almost got involved in the controversy baby truth was on the podcast it's a black baby it's not a black baby the baby i forgot the ethnicity but i i was very curious about this so i was i was very curious and so apparently the baby did you look up where the baby's from? The ethnicity of the baby?

I'm finding the mom. I can't remember. I will say lighter than I expected. I'm finding out. No, but look at the episode. It looks very dark. Yeah. But the ethnicity of the baby, I can't remember the ethnicity.

But it's not, this is how stupid internet shit is. Let's say it's like Puerto Rican and something else. And something like that. The baby has 120,000 Twitter followers now. The baby's huge. It's blowing up. Puerto Rican and Haitian. The baby is doing an auteur style show for Netflix.

She's got a deal. It's coming out. The trend is really getting out of hand. That baby has no show running experience. Never directed. just got a deal it's coming out the trend is really getting out of hand that baby does not has no show running experience never directed twin baby boys

what's the ethnicity it always has to be twins what's the ethnicity Puerto Rican and Haitian Puerto Rican and Haitian yeah and then so the mom said like hey my baby's not black

it's Puerto Rican and Haitian and then someone's like there's black people in Puerto Rico what the fuck is your problem I was like God this is so silly. Like, why are you getting,

for just a second, all the internet controversies, for just a second, before you like start yelling at someone, just maybe give people a second and think. Is this worth it? No, we're just like, well, maybe their heart was in the right place

and that is not what they meant to do you know it's gonna suck maybe that lady wasn't trying to offend black people by saying hey my kid's not black it's Puerto Rican and Haitian maybe her goal wasn't to offend you you know maybe Lena is casting a baby and she couldn't find a

half white half Pakistani baby and she got this baby that seemed like the closest skin tone they probably had a row of babies and they're like god damn none of these babies look beige enough shit can we can we lighten the baby yeah they could have they could have color corrected the baby to make this skin tone a little bit lighter you know it's gonna suck a bit it should have just been like it should have just been a normal episode you never never met Riz Ahmed's character. Nothing. It's just like one of the normal girls' episodes,

and then it cuts to a black baby sucking on her titty. You're like, wait, what? You know what's going to suck? It's the blog post when it says, Aziz rips on Lena Dunham's black baby. They don't have a fun time reading it. I won't. That shouldn't happen.

There's enough context. The internet's the worst. I'm gonna be out there saying stuff for a couple weeks before I go away again. I think we got through this pod without anything. I really do. You never know. Usually I'll look at Tate after and be like, eh, should we cut the part when

Aziz talked about Blank? I don't... We're're fine can when is season two come out uh it's may 12th may 12th yeah is that right yeah may 12th is that like a friday night midnight type thing it's friday oh it's strange i like when they do that it was because you just spend the weekend and just watch the whole thing well they go they go right for the stoners they go right for like the 11 p.m. I just got bathed. I just bought chips.

Oh, it's easy to show drop. I spend, you know, me, Al, and our team, we spend a year making a season of the show. It's about a year. Yeah. To write it, shoot it, edit it, you know, then even, you know, the promotion, whatever. It's about a year.

And then everyone watches it on the weekend. Yeah, Bob's watching it at 4.30 in the morning. When's the next one? When are you making the next one? Dude, we just took a year to make that one, man. Give me a minute. Good luck. So come back after I watch it,

and then we can talk about it. Yeah, if you want, I'm down. Yeah, you're here. It'll be a three-hour episode, but I'm down if you are. And I still have, what was the one we didn't tell i didn't tell we could put this up before we can put this up before may 12th four and then put up another one after we'll put it up like whenever we do the next one and maybe you can hear the story what's this what's your name tate tate tate maybe i'll tell

you a story about the time i was in a club with Drake and some girl lost her contact lenses. It's true. We never talked about David Cho. David Cho, my good friend. I don't think we should. I think we should intentionally not talk about him. Yeah, let's not talk about him. Because he listened to this for 91 minutes waiting for me to bring him up and i never did and we have a mutual friend anyway so what was the thing that happened with uh yeah

yeah whatever thanks for coming on thanks all right thanks to stamps.com they bring the u.s postal service right to your fingertips buy and print official u.s postage for any letter any package any class meal using your own computer and printer. They'll send you a digital scale, automatically calculate exact postage. Never go to the post office. Again, sign up for stamps.com. Use promo code BS for a four-week trial plus postage plus a digital scale with no long-term commitments. Click on the microphone at the top of the stamps.com homepage. Type in BS. Thanks to the ringer.comcom don't forget to check out that billions piece we did this week I might have a piece on there today actually go check that out and uh thanks to Larry Wilmore's black on the air podcast launched this week subscribe to it now don't forget to subscribe to that and cousin Sal sure thing our new oh no that's not what it's called. It's called, that's his Facebook thing.

It's called Against All Odds with Cousin Sal. Sorry, Cousin Sal. Against All Odds with Cousin Sal, our new gaming podcast. Subscribe to that wherever you get your podcasts. Enjoy the weekend. We'll be back with you. I wanna see them

On a way so I can say I don't have A few years with them I don't have.