The Bill Simmons Podcast - Ep. 100: Joe House and JackO

Episode Date: May 19, 2016

HBO and The Ringer's Bill Simmons and Joe House celebrate Episode 100 by discussing last night's Thunder-Warriors game, the NBA salary cap and contract extensions (18:00), and the NBA draft lottery (25:00). Then, JackO joins to talk Trump and the Yankees (35:00), and House closes with thoughts on D.C. sports (56:00). Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

today's episode of the bill simmons podcast the 100th episode of the bill simmons podcast is brought to you by c geek our presenting sponsor the only fan-friendly app for buying and selling tickets for sports and music you see each other house i do use c geek of course i do good answer yeah other sites have the nasty habit of showing you lower prices and charging you huge fees to check out at c geek the price you see is always the price you pay. Download the free SeatGeek app or go to SeatGeek.com. Today's episode is also brought to you by Stamps.com. Stop relying on the post office. Buy and print official U.S. postage using your own computer and your own printer. Do you have your own computer and your own printer, Jonas? I have both of those things. Great. You should sign up

for Stamps.com. Use the promo code BS for a four-week tryout plus a $110 bonus offer. It includes postage and a digital scale. Go to Stamps.com, click on the microphone at the top of the homepage, type in BS. Do you have HBO, Joe House? I do have HBO. Well, my

HBO show is called Any Given Wednesday, and it launches on June 22nd, Wednesday, 10 o'clock. Nice. Yeah. We also have a new start time for After the Thrones on HBO Now. Do you have HBO Now, Joe House? I do have HBO Now. It's been moved up to 1 a.m. ET, late Sunday night, right after the West Coast airing of Game of Thrones ends. Sources say.

I'm in bed at 1 a.m. ET. Sources say. Yeah. Well, you're not always in bed at 1 a.m. Sources say. Yeah. Well, you're not always in bed because sometimes you might have indigestion. Sources say that apparently this week of Game of Thrones is an all-timer. Really? Yeah. Last week was pretty good.

All-timer has been thrown around for this week. I particularly enjoyed the ending of last week. We can talk about that. And let's not forget about The Ringer. We are launching next month. Subscribe to our newsletter at theringer.com. You subscribe to our newsletter, Joe House? Of course I do.

You can listen to podcasts like Channel 33, Keeping It 1600, The Watch, The Ringer NBA Show, The Ringer NFL Show. All of them are on The Ringer Podcast Network as well as... Check House! Check House, presented by Callaway. That's Joe House's golf podcast. We have seven podcasts. We have I think we have the highest batting average of good podcasts of any podcast network.

You should think that. We're seven for seven. You should think that. We're batting a thousand. Yeah, I like it. I'm almost afraid to launch another one. We have seven good ones. And speaking of podcasts, let's go. And in person, Wednesday rolling with Joe House. Keeping it 100. We fed last night.

We went to Sugarfish. We took Sugarfish takeout and watched basketball in my office, and we were hoping for a good game. And then Steven Adams. Azili just landed on his back, and Steven Adams got hurt, and then he said, today I'm fine, mate. I'm okay, mate. Couple bumps and bruises, mate.

I'll be okay, mate. I didn't think the Thunder were the same after that happened. They need him. They need his energy. They need him. They need his energy. They need him. They need his energy. They also need Russell Westbrook. I didn't know Russell Westbrook was going to not show up.

You know who did know, by the way? Very happy to see you on my little voyage out here to California. Juliet Littman. Juliet said to me, I don't like Russ tonight. I think he's only going to be 17 or 18. I'm like, come on, Juliet. Russ is going to be 17 or 18. I'm like, come on, Juliet. Third. I lie. Russ is going to go crazy.

This is their chance to seize the series. Russ was not good last night. He didn't have that alpha dog feel to him. I thought when Curry got gone, Russ, at the very least, would do the, oh, okay, I'll try to match you and either be great or a disaster. And now there's a narrative where, because Klay Thompson played him more this game than the previous game, and now Russ is two for 10 when Klay Thompson is guarding him.

So there's a narrative that Klay Thompson could shut down Russ. The thing that was so curious to me about Russ's performance last night, his game, his alpha dog comes from him pushing the ball. Him going up the floor warp speed, you know, he's fastest or second fastest in the league. Got to give a little nod to my boy Johnny Walb. So you're taking John Wall over Westbrook in a speed race? It's neck and neck.

I'm not ready to concede that race to Russell. But Russell finishes in a more explosive way than John Wall. That is for sure. We just didn't see it. We didn't see Russell taking the ball and running up court and creating Russell Westbrook type of offense. He wasn't generating offense through that kind of aggression last night. I don't know why.

I thought that they would. I believed them when they said they were going to come out and try it. And they thought game two was a must win, all that stuff. And it turns out it wasn't totally a must win. But they had a chance there to at least if they had gone toe to toe. Curry got hot. And I wanted somebody to step up. But Durant was trying.

Durant was shooting on the first half. He had a lot of turnovers in that game. And the tech kind of took him out of it. It seemed like it took his head out of it, the tech that he got. And yelling at FU at Dion Waiters. Did you see that? They say that they're friendly that way. Those are the kinds of things they do with each other.

That's part of their, uh you know shtick i don't ever remember just yelling fuck you at you in a friendly way i don't know i think maybe you have maybe you're pretty sure i don't remember that girls or food or all right so with durant i haven't loved how he played i thought he was amazing in the second half of Game 4 San Antonio. He was obviously fantastic in Game 6. But for the most part, hasn't shot threes well at all. Postseason,

six threes a game, he's 29% from three. A lot of turnovers. Four a game, he had eight last names, got 13 in this series. they just seem sloppy to me and i wonder it's weird because golden state has the same problem golden state's super sloppy with the ball for such an unbelievably efficient offensive team and uh i just wonder like if this gets to a game seven is sloppiness gonna be the thing that undoes one of these teams?

Undoes? Undoes? What did I say? Undoes? Undoes? What am I? Dumbass. Undoes one of these teams.

Sloppy? I don't know about sloppiness. Okay. The thing that one of the— Why don't you vehemently disagree with me then? I don't— Why don't you tell me fuck you? Fuck you, Simmons't why don't you tell me fuck you fuck you simmons i don't agree with you it's not that rapid port owns f-bomb corner by the way i'm not he he's he's he's so destroyed that he slayed f-bomb corner i want to just stay off of it i want to stay away from it yeah he bought f-bomb corner like chris sack about all

that twitter stock he bought it off his secondary it's like wow 18 of f bomb corner he knows for sale he's got 90 of it and and there's not i want to stay away from the remaining 10 um i think you know that the the both teams have such a similar style of um play this incandescent offense is the thing that distinguishes them through the season. I know Golden State's defensive metrics, all the analytics, support them as a top five defensive team. And that's because it's well-founded. But they can get beat, right? They're compromised when they go up against good guards portland showed it boston showed it so i think they feel more beatable

than they did three months ago i still think they're gonna win the title oh you you oh that's interesting because we haven't talked about cleveland that who is now nine and oh last time we talked they were eight and oh and i liked it now they're nine and oh and i still like it i don't know what to make of Cleveland because the competition, the three best teams were in the West. That's true. Right? San Antonio would have easily been the second team in the East.

OKC Golden State, you look at the guys that were in last night's game. Klay Thompson's been the best player game in, game out in the entire playoffs. I don't think he's the best player in the playoffs, but I think he's been the best player of the playoffs. That's interesting. He didn't have a great shooting game last night. No, he didn't. I just like what he does.

I think what he does defensively for them is so underrated. I mean, he's certainly been in the top five. I think LeBron's been in the conversation. You think he's had a better playoffs than Kyrie? Kyrie's had a pretty good playoffs. Kyrie's on one end, though. He's a DH. I don't know.

I just think if you look at most indispensable guys to their team for all the stuff they've asked Klay to do. Actually, Draymond, you can say the same thing. I was going to say, Draymond might be mad at you right now. You're going to put Klay ahead of Draymond? I just love the way Klay's playing. Okay. Yeah. I guess maybe I shouldn't decide on a number one. I think if you made an all-NBA first team for the playoffs, he's unquestionably the two-guard.

Both of those guys would be on, Draymond and Klay. And I would put LeBron and Kyrie. You'd put Kyrie over Curry because he missed so many games? Yeah, Curry missed games. And then the fifth is your choice of Russell or KD. I think Russell's been a little better. Who do you give more credit for the San Antonio series? Well, the Game 5, it's tough because it vacillates.

You know, I was thinking, I've always wanted the NBA to have, you know how hockey has the three stars of the game? Number three star, number two star, number one star? Yes. I really wish they did that for NBA, and I wish we kept track of it. Because I would love to know, just after the playoffs, who is the best player in every playoff game? You know what? You have a staff.

You have people that... Let's just do it. Because game one, I would have given it to Westbrook. First star Westbrook, right? First star Westbrook. Game two, unquestionably Curry. Unquestionably Curry. But it would have just been fun to go through all the games.

Like game six of Spurs-OKC. Yes. I would have given it to Durant. I would have given game four Durant. Game five is easily Westbrook. Yeah. And you just go on down the line. Kawhi was...

Let's start doing this. Kawhi was game one. I do feel like somebody should be keeping track of this. Well, so look, you're going to have a website, I hear. Lillard had a couple first stars. Yeah, sure he did. You're damn right he did. LeBron got the Cavs.

Like LeBron will be one one game. Kyrie will be one one game. Kevin Love's had one. Yeah, Kev's got one. For the Celtics, like, you know,aiah had that one game and then i don't know it'd just be a fun thing to look back on i'd love to know who's leading the league in first star games it's not a lot of characters what would you call it uh gold medalist stars of the game gold silver bronze well why do you have to change it stars of the game first star to the you know

overwhelming mvp of the game and then a second star and a third star to recognize uh the contributions of all the dudes out there yeah i'm fine even just doing it one star you just want to do the gold star yeah or you like a star and a runner up but i'd be most interested because every game has a best guy and that's what this series is going to come down to like you had westbrook game one although really nobody was the best player in that game it was like westbrook by default curry definitely game two it's going to come down to. Like you had Westbrook game one, although really nobody was the best player in that game. It was like Westbrook by default. Curry definitely game two. Durant's going to have a game in game three or game four.

Durant will be the best player in one of those two games. So you'll have a Draymond game. We're agreed, we're agreed. You'll have another Curry game. You'll probably have a full-fledged Westbrook-Alfredo game. I still think this goes seven. Yeah, you've been saying that. I can't come up with a way to

argue and you know what i really don't want to argue i want i want this to go seven because i want to watch all these games between these two teams this that game yesterday felt like it was going to be really good and then curry started hitting threes okc got super lazy on defense and uh unless adam is going adams is going 110 percent i don't think they can beat Golden State. I hope he's healthy. The two things that happened yesterday, and it was very encouraging to see him come back. And he was sort of effective. He moved up and down the court.

We didn't say, oh, my God, he's limping or, oh, my God, he's holding his back. But the two things that happened yesterday, the game was neck and neck, and then Golden State closed out the second quarter on an 8-0 run. And then they came out in the third quarter and got hot. And I have no idea what was going on with the switching defense. And maybe that's why KD yelled F you at Waiters. The number of uncontested shots that Curry had in the third quarter, it's like, you know, the Warriors have played 85 games now. Maybe there's some tape of Steph Curry,

and he ought not to be left alone under any circumstances. If you were Cleveland, would you rather play OKC or Golden State? Golden State, 1,000% Golden State. Over OKC? Yeah, you want the rematch. And they just won 73 games in the regular season. That's who you want to go up against. That's the history show. You want to go up against. That's the history show.

You want to be up against. And by the way, think about that legacy for LeBron. If they went out, they sweep the East, right? They go in there 12-0. And we're kind of rooting for that for a couple different reasons. 12-0 would be fun. Oh, yeah. We have a vested interest in the Cavs going 12-0 now.

Oh, yeah. We've got a vested interest. There's a plus 180 sweep bet. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. We got a mess in interest. Yeah, Daddy. It was a plus 180 sweet bet. Oh, yeah. After we lost that Spurs bet. That was okay. That was a good bet. Great odds.

But we should have gone against it, as usual. Should have been a little hedge. We had the Spurs 10-1 last summer. It never worked out. There was an easy hedge to make before the OKC Spurs series started, and we didn't do it. Yeah. Because we're dumb. We're dumbasses.

Yeah, we are dumbasses. But think about all the narratives. If Cleveland sweeps through 12-0, LeBron, this will be his seventh consecutive appearance in the finals. Which is one of the great stats. Unbelievable. Unbelievable. I don't even think...

I guess Russell. Russell was obviously in seventh straight. Probably Sam Jones. All those guys who were on the 56 Celtics through. Wilt made it in 67. So if you go after 67, I'm not sure anyone's done that. Seven straight. Magic didn't do it.

You know why Magic didn't do it? Because he didn't show up for the 86 finals. We sent him an invitation. We sent him an invitation. He RSVP'dp'd yes i'm plus 11 didn't show up you always got to get in that ass you're always in that ass we sent him an invitation the thing that i think of when we talk about historical legacy stats like that is again um what david stern did to michael jordan interrupted that run for the bulls uh because

because we might have had yeah you know could have been six or seven for the MJ I wonder if the 94 Knicks could have could have beaten them if MJ came back just from the attrition on the bodies of the Bulls from game 7 and 90 eastern finals then finals finals finals you're talking like 400 games over the course of three and a half years. And at some point they would have had injury, bad luck with one of those guys. Yeah. That's what's so interesting. And, and, and I don't know, compelling about LeBron. He changed teams and he is now, I think it's legit to posit. You can make the argument that this is the best team he's played on perhaps in his whole career. I think you can make the argument that this is the best team he's played on,

perhaps in his whole career. I think you can make the argument. I still think that 2013 Miami team. I know. I don't disagree. Wade, for me, Wade's in the top. I don't know. I did my book when I had the levels. There was the Pantheon and then the level right below it.

Yes. Wade's on that level for me now. Sure. Hershey, I saw our friend Hershey on Monday and we were kind of redoing the top 30 just for fun. Oh, sorry, I missed it. Wade has crept into the top 30 pretty easily now. He's somewhere between.

I'd have to really look at it and look at all the numbers, but he's in that 23 to 27 range and nobody that lebron is playing with right now is on that level i i don't uh disagree one bit um it's it's just that this calves team has waves of of players they do i i'm i'm just i'm cautious with them sure i really think the east is terrible and And I think, like, you know, I was on this Boston radio station, Toucher and Rich, and we were talking about Durant. Everyone in Boston thinks Durant's coming. What?

I know. Boston's the best. F-ing Boston is the best. So absurd. And with, you know, OKC, if they had lost to San Antonio in Game 5, I really think we had a chance at Durant because I think it would have combusted. I'm so surprised to hear you say that.

Here's why I think. Remove Boston out of it, right? Boston and Miami, because if Bosh retires, Miami's going to have all this cap space. If I'm a free agent like Durant, and I don't think I can win with the team I have, I want to go in the East.

It's a clear path to the finals. I'm just looking at the Cavs and that's it. Who else is in my way? I don't disagree with the thesis. It's a no-brainer. I'm going to Miami or I'm going to Boston. I have a chance to put together a title team and be in the Final Four every year. It's a fun hypothetical, but they won that game.

And now they're in the Western Conference Finals. But if Golden State kicks their ass the next three and all of a sudden it goes bad and they're yelling at each other like Boston, that's our only chance. The only way that it goes bad in that way is if somebody, one of these important guys gets hurt and they get, you know. There's not going to be now all of a sudden some kind of internal dissension. I mean, I'm already in the record. I know how you're dreaming. Yeah, right. Exactly. It's okay to dream. I've told yeah right exactly it's okay to dream i've told you before it's okay to dream you dream

durant would be he i mean he would really have to want to leave if he didn't just do a one-year extension right he's gonna do a one-year extension we've been saying it since october you know what i found out and i look forward to this being a transcript and multiple blog posts with people getting traffic from it this is great so apparently and it's never really been activated before because um nobody's ever been in a cap position to do this but the cap is going up to such a crazy amount this summer yes yes so the Warriors this is what i heard the warriors if they let barnes go and they let azili go they could give the extra cap money to steph they could pay him a year early oh yeah i didn't know nobody nobody knows about this rule but it's in

the cap it's like buried in there it's in the whole cba yeah this is one i'm gonna i'm gonna he's in the last year of his thing they could they could literally just give him a raise next year over spending the money on someone else we should i'm gonna tweet at uh nate duncan i want i want some some cap you know insider larry coon we need larry coon break this down for us because this rule exists. Somebody swore to me that this, that, and the Warriors don't want anyone to know about it because then if Steph Curry finds out, they're like, I won't get paid. Well, they should pay him. I mean, for the love of God, you know, he gave them a title. He gave them 73, you know.

I don't feel bad for these guys. Curry's going to make, what, $40 million off the court this year? I'm not talking about feeling bad or anything. I'm talking about getting paid what he's doing. If there's room under the cap and his employer can reward his excellent performance, then the employer should do so. Are you ready for a world in which Harrison Barnes signs a four-year deal for $120 million with the Lakers? You forget we were in that world 15 years ago. Not like this. Juwan Howard signed a seven-year, $124 million...

To ruin your team. $124 million deal with the Miami Heat. To ruin your basketball team. So you just mentioned a number for Harrison Barnes. There's not, you know... The numbers are irrelevant.

They ebb and flow. They constrict and expand based on the deals the league's able to cut. And I don't care. So I think the Lakers get Barnes. Oh. I think somebody overpays Azealy. Oh. on the deals the league's able to cut and i don't care so i think the lakers get barns oh i think somebody overpays azili oh and the warriors make a run at the rant okay and if it

doesn't work out i think they just give the money to steph interesting they still need two players by the way but uh the problem is and people have talked about it, but I don't think the average basketball fan really understands what's going to happen this summer. Dion Waiters, for example. Kind of like Waiters. I'm on the Waiters Island. You and Zach have been on Waiters Island. You're alone on there, by the way.

At least I'm not on that island. He's been playing hard in the playoffs. Congratulations. It's about time. He's probably going to make between $ $12 and $15 million a year. Somebody's going to sign him for between $60 and $80 million to play for their basketball team. It's just a function of the money that's available because the league has been so successful. And all credit to the guys that paved the way for this.

And they hit a great moment in broadcasting sports rights history and signed this super rich deal. I'm glad you believe that. There's a long and storied history of great NBA teams screwing themselves up by overpaying somebody who wasn't as good as one or two of their best players. Oh, I live in Washington. I'm familiar with this technique you're describing. It will happen one or two times this summer where somebody on a team is going to get a ridiculous contract and it's going to completely screw up that team. It will happen.

I can't wait. It's one of my favorite dynamics every year. For instance, let's say Barnes says, I'll stay. I want a five-year deal for like $150,000. And all of a sudden, he's making more. And Harrison Barnes is making way more money than Draymond Green and Steph Curry. And everyone's like, no, this is great. We need to keep Harrison.

There's no way Draymond Green is going to be okay with that. He's too competitive. He won't like that. He just won't. Deep down, it's going to bother him. So that's interesting for a lot of teams. That's going to happen in Washington because they're going to sign Bradley Beal to an extension. And he'll make more money than John Wall.

It's going to drive John Wall crazy. Yes. It already makes John Wall crazy that Reggie Jackson makes as much money as he does. Yeah. It's going to make him very crazy. This is a real thing for these dudes. They measure themselves by all MBAs and respect and seating in All-Star weekend on Saturday, how close they are to the best dunks and who makes the most money in their team. It's a real thing.

They're fucking competitive. That's why they're great at basketball, because they're competitive guys. Yes. Fascinating. I remember when I re-signed with ESPN and then they gave Riley that ludicrous contract. God bless him for getting as much money as he could get. But in the moment, I was really bummed out. So I can't even imagine how Steph Curry's going to feel when Harrison Barnes triples

his salary. They are going to let Harrison go his way. To the Lakers. Wherever Harrison wants to go. Are you excited for Mike D'Antoni to coach James Harden? Because that's in play. That is incredible. I bet they get along really well.

I think D'Antoni is a, what do you want to call him? He's a whisperer. But I don't know, how would you characterize Harden? A scorer whisperer? It's the worst defensive player of any good player in the league with one of the worst defensive coaches in the history of the league. Yes, a match made in heaven. And they're going to join forces.

A match made in heaven. It's going to be great. Somebody's going to score 110 points on them. And Dwight— A single player. Dwight will be gone. Dwight will be gone. Dwight's going to end up on Dallas.

He'll end up in the rejuvenation program that Dallas is put together. It really does. Because that's what I'm calling it, a rejuvenation program. Oh, I like that. Yeah. Sure. Yeah. I'm looking at you.

It is fate. Rejuvenation. It is fate that he ends up in Dallas. It's great. It really is. Cube's history with signing washed up centers is unparalleled. He's not quite washed up yet. Oh, he's close enough.

They're going to throw him in the Darren Williams laundry machine and let him bounce around in there for a little bit. He'll come out and he'll look great. They're going to put anything inside that machine? I don't know. Probably some detergent. Something to freshen him up a little bit? Yeah, a little detergent. A little freshener.

It's going to be awesome. And I think he's going to sign there. The lottery we should talk about quickly. So we got to commercial. I mean, we did this. I don't know if you guys saw it. I was on Facebook Live and we did Periscope and I had a bunch of people in my office and we just had put the cameras on us

watching the lottery. And when it gets to like, you've been there. You won the John Wall lottery. Yes. You want to get to the John Wall lottery. Yes. You want to get to the commercial. Yep. The commercial means top three.

If your name hasn't been called and you make it to the commercial, things start to happen. They do the lottery for the first three spots of the draft. So if you get to the commercial, you know that your team won one of the first three spots. They actually won. One of the Pink Paws went their way. And at that point, who knows?

It could be anybody. So it goes to five for the Celtics. Nope. Four, I'm just petrified. I don't want to see the Celtics, and I want to see the Lakers. And the Suns popped up, and I was like, I didn't even know what to think for a second. And then you realize, oh, we've made it.

There's two kind of can't-miss guys in this draft, allegedly, and we have a chance here. Commercial waiting, panicking, come out, and somehow we got the third pick. What are the odds of the team, of the order going exactly how it was supposed to go? That is, I wonder, I'm sure somebody's written about what the odds are, but it was kind of amazing.

It went exactly chalk. What is your team going to do? That's what I'm sure somebody's written about what the odds are, but it was kind of amazing. It went exactly chalk. What is your team going to do? That's what I'm interested in. So I've had two days to think about it. Yes. Tell me who doesn't make this trade. These are always my favorites. Yeah. pick and the number 23 pick with Avery Bradley to the Chicago Bulls for Jimmy Butler and

the number 14 pick. So we move up from 23 to 14. We swap them Bradley for Butler and they give us the third pick and they end up with the third pick, Avery Bradley and number 23. That's my offer chicago i'm not sure they take it because what in the hell is chicago gonna do it doesn't seem like it's the moment to hit the you know destructo button because butler's still young and where is he he just signed that contract so they have him under contract at a good price not if i were

them i would i would dump eric rose's contract i don't think he's ever gonna be healthy i agree with that that's one important um starting point uh joe noah's got to go somewhere um other than chicago i think he ends up in atlanta that makes sense too that's very cool right nice little al horford reading yeah i like that that would make That would make Atlanta 3% more interesting, which would bring them all the way up to 8% interesting. One other scenario I was thinking for OKC, if they didn't win and Durant came back. Oh, you never gave me my thoughts on the Butler thing.

Hold on, let me do this and then give me the Butler thing. All right. OKC trades a Baca to Minnesota for the fifth pick. Yeah, I like that one, by the way. They sign Al Horford and Joakim Noah. And they put him with Billy Donovan. So it's basically Al Horford, Joakim Noah, Stephen Adams, Kevin Durant, Russell Westbrook, all those dudes. Pretty cool.

It'd be interesting. There's no chance of it happening. Basically, I want Al Horford and Joe Kim Noah to be reunited somewhere. I hope it happens. Yeah, that would be cool. Boston would be a nice place for both of them. And while we're at it, Corey Brewer's got to be available, right?

He's out there somewhere. Oh, he's so available. He's here. Corey, come on in. So I just don't think Chicago says no because they're not, they just brought in Hoiberg. He's had one year with a team that is in transition,

but you can't move your best player. When did he sign that deal? The extension was last year, right? We don't disagree. Something bad has happened there, though, with him. Something bad has happened there. Bad juju. There is bad juju.

I don't know what it is. I don't have any insights into it. It was evident from the way they played. Here's the other trade I think could happen. I think the Celts are going to trade the pick. If I had to bet my life on it, I think they're going to trade it to Philly for Jaleel Okafor. And I think it makes sense for Philly

because they have too many big dudes. Ben Simmons can't really shoot either. I don't understand how he makes sense with Okafor and Bede and Noel. It's just ridiculous. They need to do something anyway. Trade Okafor to the Celtics for three. You take Ben Simmons at one. And you take either Murray or Chris Dunn or Buddy.

Probably Chris Dunn or Jamal Murray or Chris Dunn. You take one of those guys at three. And now you have a basketball team. Then you go spend a lot of money on somebody. They need a point guard. Yeah, go get Chris Dunn. Go overpay for a shooting guard. You put Ben Simmons there.

You still have Embiid. You bring Sarich over from Philly. That's a basketball team. I think that makes much more sense than keeping Okafor. And for the Celtics, I think Okafor would be the third pick in this draft. The whole thing hinges on Embiid's foot. My man hasn't played competitive basketball in two and a half years now. And he was like in Qatar.

It's just a strange—that's a documentary. I was going to call it a 30 for 30, but you know. Do you— a documentary. I was going to call it a 30 for 30, but you know, do you, uh, the, the, the strange journey of Joel Embiid from the moment he was drafted to like, you know, the, uh, October of, of 2016, what has he been doing? What's been going on with him? It's like one of the great documentaries that nobody will make. So out of those two, you think neither of those trades are realistic. Am I going to be stuck with the third pick? I'm not dismissing the Philly trade.

I just think they need to hold on to Okafor until they've confirmed to their own satisfaction that Joel Embiid can play basketball again. Which seems like still a little bit of ways away. I mean, I keep seeing these reports of progress and he'll be ready and all that kind of optimism. But I'm raising my eyebrows a little bit over here. Would you trade third, 16, 23rd, 31, and 35 and Amir Johnson for Boogie Cousins? Of course. Of course I would. Yes. Of course. Yes. You don't think there's been too much stink on Boogie?

I think there's been too much stink. I don't think that. Six years of complete dysfunction. Yeah. Well, that's welcome to Sacramento. I mean, Kevin Johnson, by the way. The irony of you thinking the Celtics should trade for boogie cousins for how long we've known each other and the type of woman you were once attracted to. What? You were attracted to the boogie cousins of women.

I've been happily married for 10 years. No, I'm saying way back. I know, way back when. That's you were like, oh love a lot of boogie cousins Back in the day You did you loved your boogies My boy Brad Stevens If there's any coach in the league

That is a crazy person whisperer He rehabilitated Isaiah Evan Turner Before that even Even crazier. And he was in Washington. God, I'm blanking on him.

Chris Humphries? No, no, no, no. The Guard. And he has a funny nickname. Jordan Crawford. Yeah. Yeah, we did. We did save Jordan Crawford.

You got something of value for Jordan Crawford. It is amazing. I mean, if he can bring down Crawford, then he can handle Boogie. House, you love to eat so much. I do. That's true. Once upon a time, we created the House Eats video series for you on Grantland. You did that.

It was so fun. And I know you love to eat takeout. I love takeout. Yesterday, we ordered sugarfish. Takeout. You had two nizawas. And then you had a whole, like, ten other crab rolls. And you ate a whole bunch of stuff.

And it was, and you were still hungry. And you asked if there was a burger place near your hotel. It was a sushi feast. And sometimes I'm a little hungry afterwards. Well, what if you stopped wasting money on expensive takeout? Yeah. And what if you just signed up with Blue Apron? It's kind of a good idea.

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and sautéed spinach. Right now, you can get your first two meals for free with free shipping by going to blueapron.com slash BS. Blue Apron, a better way to cook. And since we're talking about some of our favorite sponsors.

Hey Callaway, thanks for sponsoring the Shack House podcast. Oh wow. You did two last week. You did the Players Championship preview and then you did the Players Championship post game. Yeah, we did. And this is the time for Sh house because u.s opens coming up yeah we have this is golf we're in the golf stretch yeah we're golf matters now and not just that we're in a a season where the um schedule is highly compressed because they're squeezing in

the olympics in august uh you know for the first time in 80 years there will be golf in the olympics i'm sure people are going bananas for it um but the uh um all of the majors will be golf in the Olympics. I'm sure people are going bananas for it. But all of the majors will be done before the Olympics. So it's an incredible stretch coming up here. And then we have the Ryder Cup after the Olympics. So yeah, it's a great time to be a golf fan. And the reason you're in LA is because Callaway decided they would fly you here because they wanted to fit you for equipment and put you on a bunch of Callaway videos. You're becoming like a Callaway guy. I fly you here because they wanted to fit you for equipment

and put you on a bunch of Callaway videos. You're becoming like a Callaway guy. I love it. I'm deep. I'm Callaway deep. I already love Callaway, but now that they've adopted you, I love Callaway more than just about anyone in my life

other than my wife and kids. Well, let me tell you about a Callaway product that has me extraordinarily excited. And I was not, there's no script here. We haven't been prompted to talk about this. They came out with All Blacks. They blacks this week they launched it you can uh pre-order them they're all blacks apex pro apex and apex pros i think and the the shafts the grips the irons themselves all blacks do you think that there's any chance in the world that joe house is

not going to go all black 100 yeah i mean come on people thought you were black on the podcast for five years of course you're doing the all blacks uh yeah so calloway thanks for sponsoring the shack house podcast it is doing very well all of our podcasts are crushing in itunes thanks to everybody that's listening thanks for spreading the word for us and And we couldn't be happier with our podcast. Started at the bottom. Now we're here. And speaking of podcasts, one of our original OG BS Report guests back in the day, now the BS podcast. We're going to call him right now.

He's finally out of his emotional coma. Maybe. We're going to call Jacko. He's waiting for us. Yeah. Started at the bottom. Now the whole crew's here. Hello? He's waiting for us Yeah Started at the bottom Now the whole crew's here Hello Johnny

What's up buddy I'm here with House Yeah Hi House Yeah Johnny What's up baby This is a good thing Because you know

People always claim That House and I Sound exactly alike So this is definitive proof That we're two different people People are amazed That you know each other, and I'm like, are you kidding? They've seen each other probably naked.

They know each other so intimately. My favorite thing is on Twitter, anytime you come on, Johnny, and folks want to get in that ass a little bit about your political point of view, I get a lot of tweets at me about, you know, jamming up your ass, Republican asshole,

that kind of stuff. Now Johnny's like, he's wandering the earth like David Carradine in Kung Fu 50 years ago. He's a man with no affiliation to anything. He did renounce. You renounced on Twitter. It was an official resignation?

I did. I did renounce. And that's only really sealed the deal for me in the past couple weeks with Rents, Prebys, and the rest of the Republican establishment bowing and scraping before that orange asshole who's going to be the nominee of the party and take it down and play it. So it's good to watch it all blow up from a distance and not really be concerned about it anymore. I mean, the two things I never thought in my life you would turn on, other than me, were the Yankees and the Republican Party. And now you're just wandering Connecticut.

A man without a party. Yes, indeed. We joked about this last year happening. You advised us to bet on Rubio. We did. Sal and I put a big bet on Marco Rubio before we realized that maybe it was a bad idea to bet on somebody who got nervous during debates. Just hold on one second. Talk amongst yourselves.

I have to go deal with something. Hang on one second, okay? All right. We're going to talk about ourselves. Yeah. We're calling Johnny at work, so he has to... He's got a business. You know what was interesting? That was not

his usual complex litigation. This is John. He's on the rise, man. He's moved up in the ranks. I think he's forming a third party. Is he sitting on the bench? Is that why he had to go away right now? He has a ruling to make? I think he might be a Supreme Court justice possibility if the other guy falls through.

Well, Trump put out 10 names or 12 names yesterday. Johnny, maybe Johnny's in the 13 to 15 slot. Can we bet on those names? Was one of them Omarosa? Who are the names? Was Vince McMahon on there i i didn't recognize any of them but i'm not you know a master of uh the conservative um jurors the bench i did five and a half hours with mike frances on monday and there was a 10 minute stretch where he talked about why he thought

trump was going to make for a good president i just just stayed silent. I didn't really know what to do. Well, New Yorkers, there is a strong sentiment among New Yorkers who have observed him get public things done, public works that could not get done. Trump intervened and got those things done. So I understand that. I heard the Frances a bit. I get it.

But why did he have to offend so many people? I don't have any answers. That's the part I don't get. You're not going to have me come up with any answers as to what the point is of the wall and keep the Muslims on our list and all that other kind of stuff. Did you get excited when Chris Sacka predicted that Mark Cuban was going to run for president? I, you know, he knows things, right? Hey, it's Johnny.

Johnny, we were just talking about whether Mark Cuban would make for a good president or not. Yeah, I didn't understand that. Like, these never-Trump people were out looking for a candidate, and they were like, well, we have one crazy billionaire, so maybe that's what the people want is, like, a billionaire that tweets late at night, so we need one of our own. I didn't understand that at all. I thought that they would go out and get Romney

or get Paul Ryan or get this guy Ben Sasse, who's a senator from Nebraska, but the Mark Cuban rumors were shocking to me. The Ben Sasse, that one kind of gained some steam over the last couple weeks. Yeah, because he's been like a fervent never-Trump guy and gone against the party, even though he's the senator and said Trump is unfit to be president

and doesn't want him anywhere near the Oval Office. So he's been like a rare profile in courage in this whole thing. So people have hopes for him. So what happens in Cleveland in less than, I guess it's two months away. We're two months away. Yeah, what happens? Tell us what happens. I don't know. I think it's going to away. We're two months away. Yeah, what happens? Tell us what happens.

I don't know. I think it's going to be like a big Vegas extravaganza with Trump there. I think there'll be showgirls and a lot of gold plating. And there's rumors he's going to give a speech every single night and whip up his crazy crowd and scream about the wall and scream about whatever conspiracy theories he has in his head at the moment and call Hillary crooked Hillary. And it's going to be a fiasco. Would you rather—

He's going to get nominated. I mean, there's no—you know, I had hoped for a broker's convention, and the Cruz got killed in Indiana, and he, you know, got out. He's not going to understand. He didn't see a path to victory. I mean, he was hoping that Trump—you know, the first ballot, Trump didn't get 1237. And then on the second ballot, people weren't beholden to him. And they turned for a conservative alternative.

And they say, well, they look at the polls. And if Trump was getting murdered in the polls, they would be like, we can't nominate a guy to get murdered. So, but then Cruz folded up his tent and that's what she wrote. Would you have rather Trump became the Republican nominee or the owner of the Yankees? If you had to pick. Wow. I think I'd rather him as the owner of the Yankees because basically Steinbrenner

kind of was Trump. That's good. That's patriotic of you too. You'd rather have the Yankees burn to the ground than the country. I've seen the Yankees win the World Series. I don't want to see my country end up in, like, the Great Depression with riots and civil wars. You know, the dollar worth nothing. So, yeah, I'd rather him burn the Yankees into the ground.

That is true. What are the differences between Steinbrenner and Trump, other than, like, the offensive stuff Trump said, but just from, like, an egomaniomaniac, center of attention type of force of personality thing? They were similar. This first occurred to me when, in late March, there was a Mike and the Met reunion at Radio City Music Hall. Leading up to that, they played their greatest hits on the way. One day I was driving home from work, and they had an interview with Steinbrenner from 1991 or 1992,

the late year of the Yankee years. And so Francesco was kind of raking him over the coals about mistakes the Yankees had made and terrible trades and firing managers after three weeks and everything else. And Steinbrenner sounded exactly like Trump sounds now in this campaign, where he, like, deflected blame for anything bad that happened. It was always somebody else's fault. Everything was good. He was responsible for.

He was, like, you know, Francesco's like, well, you know, you drove Lup else's fault. Everything was good. He was responsible for it. He was like, you know, Frances is like, well, you know, you drove Lupinella away. He hates you. And he's like, no, no, he loves me. And I called Mark Schott. She's wonderful. And I gave him a wonderful recommendation. And I'm like, my God, he sounds just like Trump in this campaign. It's really scary.

It must be a thing for like, you know, New York egomaniacs with billions of dollars. How would you compare donald trump jr to hank steinbrenner well i don't know i don't know which one's hank and which one's hal i think eric trump he may be hal he seems like kind of the uh the loser in the family yeah and uh you know and then well i don't know yeah i guess I guess maybe Hank is Donald Jr. because that was the firstborn. But I think unlike Steinbrenner, Hank wasn't allowed to really run the Yankees. Hal took over.

He was kind of the brains of the operation. I'm not sure that Donald Jr. might be the brains of the younger generation to the extent there is any. What do you got, Hass? The Washington Post actually had a very nice treatment of the two Trump boys. They didn't really talk about Ivanka very much, but as their own men and had a nice little interview with them. It's in today's paper.

I was actually kind of impressed. I was impressed. What it talked about was how they were raised by their mother, and they went to the Czech Republic for summers. And over there, they kind of learned from their grandparents. They got a certain grounding. They learned how to hunt. There was no television in the place that they visited. So I had a little bit of a—it was an eye-opening moment for me with the Trump boys.

They're going to have to learn that. I was going to say those hunting skills are going to come in handy during our civil war. Everyone has to get their own food. I will say this. I've seen the daughter, Ivanka. Ivanka or Ivana? Ivanka, I guess.

Ivana was the wife. Ivanka is the daughter. I've seen her on TV and she's fairly impressive, basically. She has more brains than her father and is better spoken. Like I feel more comfortable with her as the candidate, frankly, than him. So to the extent he had anything to do with raising them, like that's one plus in his favor. But I'm not sure how much he did. I can't believe we're getting into here are the positives about Trump.

But I mean, one of the things is his kids did turn out pretty well. Like you got to hand it to him. And he has done a couple really smart business things over the years. The USFL not being one of the things is his kids did turn out pretty well. Like, you got to hand it to him. And he has done a couple really smart business things over the years, the USFL not being one of them. Well, to be fair, let's give credit to the mom. I'm not sure we should give them credit. The story says he was pretty much like, you know, he would check in once in a while, you know,

oh, school's over, come down to the office, come see me. It sounds like me. Part of me wished we had had four kids, because I think it would have been fun to have the one kid that all these rich families have, like the Fredo, basically, that's just got home until they're 42. And then I realized, like, that might just be my son. I might have accomplished it in two kids. You might not have to have four to have Fredo.

At the soccer game on Saturday, my son is eight and a half. He had a hole in his shirt at my daughter's soccer game. There's hundreds of people there. And my son's like, Dad, watch this. And does the Hulk Hogan, just rips his shirt off. And is shirtless the rest of the soccer game. And I'm like like he really might be living home till he's like 43 why did he do that i don't know he's eight and a half it's not like

he's four right this is what i mean and then the ice cream man showed up and he did this dead-on imitation of eddie murphy's ice cream man routine which apparently started on serious which i blame my wife um but started going, ice cream, ice cream, the ice cream man is coming. And people were just like, is this kid like for real? Is this an actor? Are there hidden cameras? That's my son.

So I might have accomplished it. I can't believe we've now devolved into like Kathy Lee talking about our kids, but I'll join in too. Please do. At the age we are now. So on Monday, I was the chaperone on my 10-year-old daughter's fourth grade field trip to the home of the Pilgrims, Plymouth, Massachusetts. So that required me to be on a bus for five hours, two and a half hours each way with 40-odd fourth and fifth graders.

And these nine and 10-year-old boys are completely insane. When I got off that bus, I would have started to take heroin. Alcohol wasn't strong enough. Because the PTSD I had from being on a bus with these boys that are completely out of control. Completely out of control. And that's all boys, Johnny. That's all little boys. Oh, my God. They are crazy.

Now, I'm young enough to remember being on field trips in fifth and sixth grade. I'm like, we were never that crazy. We weren't angels. But these boys are crazy. I came home and talked to my wife, and I'm like, I said, I'm like this old guy, get off my lawn. I'm like, I think it's the video game. It's the video game. We weren't like that.

So it may not just be your son. i just think it's like young boys are like getting crazier or something i don't know what it is yeah the best way it's insanity i've had this conversation with all of our friends every friend i've had who's had a boy at some point thought there was something seriously wrong with them and you have to have this oh no no don't worry it'll it'll even out i mean i i have ahalf-year-old. I feel like I need to chime in a little bit here. He's in the pull his pants down at every moment stage. As soon as I walk in the door, his pants are down and his ass is in my face. Right.

Daddy, I'm going to rub my ass on you. He sees his ass. No, no, no, son. You can't say ass. That's so dumb. What is wrong with you? They hit six and they become like a little bit less dumb. And then from like six to nine, it's kind of they're half dumb.

I think at some point it levels out. As soon as they get interested in girls, I think it finally maybe levels out a little bit. Maybe that's it. Johnny, since we're here, Yankees quickly? They're awful. That's all. No comment. No, they're awful that's all no comment no um they're terrible and you know i had hopes that maybe they

could be competitive or be decent this year just given their pitching but severino who's a great prospect has been awful yeah and you know the other option if they weren't going to be good is they just have to write out bad contracts they have to write out they have to write out sabathia's contract and they have to write out the Sheriff's contract and A-Rod's contract next year. And then they'll have some money to play with. And then, sorry, House, they're going to go make a $500 billion 10-year offer to Bryce Harper. Makes me very unhappy.

Very unhappy. I love their bullpen. I mean, their bullpen was everything we thought it would be and more with Chapman and Potanis and Miller. So that's been great, but everything else has been awful. Johnny, I have an announcement to make and you're part of it. Yes. Oh. We're launching the

Ringers MLB show next week. And you and I are hosting the first one. Awesome. Yeah. This is exciting. Yeah, we already have the Ringers NBA show and the NFL show and we're going to also have a baseball show. And we're just going to do it by committee for a little while

until a person that we're waiting to hire is going to join the staff. And so House is going to get to talk Nats with somebody. Who do you want to talk Nats with, House? Maybe Mallory. Oh, Mallory would be good. You can talk Nats and Orioles. She's got a Phillies thing and an Orioles thing, two teams that I hate. I hate the Orioles 10. Two teams that I hate.

I've come to hate the Orioles 10 years ago, and I hate the Phillies now. We're going to have Fantasy and Sam Shuby talking about the Nats, all this stuff. But next week, we're going to go old school Red Sox-Yanks. Because I really like this Red Sox team. It's one of the most likable Red Sox teams we've had. And Johnny, this Ortiz season, to watch him do this, 40 years old. Yeah. It's a miracle. Just naturally being awesome like this.

And the guy just, he took care of his body. He stayed in shape. And it's fucking incredible to watch. It really is. It's incredible. He's really one for the ages. He's really better living through chemistry. You know who I heard was a pen pal of his?

I heard that Peyton Manning's wife and Poppy are pen pals. There's never been any evidence that he did anything. Did you hear that, Johnny? They mail things to each other? Did you guys ever read the Mitchell Report or what it was about? It was just people that tested negatively for some sort of substance. Like it could have been amphetamines. It could have been like Sudafed.

It could have been anything. We don't know what it was. Smear campaign. Just like Tom Brady. Johnny, have you ever been more scared of a Red Sox player than David Ortiz? No, that's the truth. No. Okay.

Because Francesca said the same thing. No. Okay. Because Francesa said the same thing. No. And there's been guys that killed the Yankees over the years. George Brett, Edgar Martinez. They could never get them out. But Ortiz has been the scariest guy in my lifetime as a Yankees fan. The guy you don't want up in any situation. Certainly a big situation.

Yeah, it's brutal. Before you go, do you have any uh mike francesa questions for me how many diet cokes did he drink during the course of the day he only had two and i made fun of him about it i was like he was so i was his i became his caffeine for the day he was so happy to have a live body in there he's been desperate for one yeah it was it was almost like the dude in lost who was trapped in the cave. What was that guy's name? The guy with the accent? Desmond?

He was in there. He had to reset the clock every year for years and years. And then he finally saw people and he almost didn't know how to react. Francesca's been in that studio just taking dumb calls for like really ever since Dog left. He was so happy to have a back and forth with somebody. It took him like two and a half hours just to remember how to have a back and forth it's true he did have 10 words to every one of yours he was then but the last two hours became a real radio show and i don't mean that as a criticism yeah no he just he was so used to just pontificating right

and so i just kind of laid back and waited for him to figure it out again. And then we had like an awesome NBA playoff segment. We did like 20 minutes on the playoffs and we were arguing. It was back and forth, bringing up things. And I don't know. I know it was a better financial situation for him to do it alone. But I still think the guy's great at radio and he's good at backing for us. Well, here's why the world is funny. Here's an ironic story. I was on the

aforementioned chaperone field trip on Monday. I was bummed out because I wanted to listen to you on Francesa. I'm on the bus and there's a little kid there and he's wearing a Kevin Durant Oklahoma City Thunder shirt and an Oklahoma City Thunder

hat. The kid says he's talking to somebody and he goes, yeah, and an Oklahoma City Thunder hat. And the kid says, he's talking to somebody, and he goes, yeah, big game tonight, OKC. I'm on the OKC train or whatever. And I go, oh, yeah, you like the Thunder? And he goes, yeah, my uncle's the coach. And I said, your uncle's Billy Donovan? And he says, yeah. And I go, oh, that's cool.

And so the kid looked like Billy Donovan. His uncle, you know, he was dedicated to his uncle, but coach of the Thunder. And then I get off the bus at five o'clock and I get in my car and I'm driving my daughter home and I turn on Mike and the Mad Dog. And there you were bashing Billy Donovan as a coach. There it is. Circle of life. It really brought the whole day together for me. Wow.

So that's really a special moment. We've told this story before, but we went to see Chip Cain and the Jersey Shore once, and our old roommate Brendan, and we listened to Mike and the Mad Dog in traffic. Was it Jersey Shore or Washington? No, Jersey Shore. Well, I don't know. We probably both. No, Jersey Shore, because we kept doing Mike and the Mad Dog impersonations that whole weekend.

Yeah, because we were just trapped in the car listening for four hours, just imitating their voices, and then did it for the rest of the weekend. And needless to say, no romance for either of us that weekend. No, no. But we were like, that is a huge, that is a huge, huge bar right there. That is a huge, massive, humongous bar. I mean, I would get to drink. All right, Johnny, next week, the Ringers MLB show.

We'll host the first one. I'll try to force myself to watch the Yankee game between now and then. All right, Johnny, next week, the Ringer's MLB show. We'll host the first one. I'll try to force myself to watch the Yankee game between now and then. Johnny, don't make him keep it in his pants for the Sox. I mean, it's a little embarrassing right now. Johnny, I'm going to say I'm concerned about you. You know, a bad Yankees team in the fall of the Republican Party, I'm worried. I feel like you might have to just fly out here and come hang out with me for a week or something.

Well, I've got my wife and kids. This is. You leave them behind for a week. That's true. You got a family. Get that going. I got to look at,

look on the bright side. All right. I'm good. That's good. That sounds good, Johnny. All right. We love you.

Talk to you later. Take care of fellows. Bye bye. All right. Bye bye. Well, I've got my wife and kids. You know it's been a bad year. It's been a good year for The Ringer.

Three months ago, we launched our new newsletter, and it's been a roaring success for us. House, you're reading it, although you're ready for the real site at this point. I am. But the newsletter's been fun. Yeah, I mean, it's good. You know me. I'm impatient. I've had enough appetizers.

I'm ready for the main course. Would you like some more pigs in the blanket? No, I'm done. I'm done with those pigs. Well, we're well over 200,000 subscribers. It's been a great place to showcase our writers. For instance, we've had two newsletters this week that featured pieces on the NBA playoffs. Facebook, Chance the Rapper, Manny Machado, Game of Thrones, and Meghan Trainor. That's the stuff you get in our newsletters. Best of all, it's free

and it looks cool and it would not have happened without our buddies at MailChimp. And if you are just getting started like The Ringer was, because we are started, we're approaching 50 employees, or if you're building a growing business like The Ringer is, please trust me, MailChimp makes it super easy to connect with your customers and sell more stuff. It's free to get started, no expiring trial, no credit card required. Go to MailChimp.com. Oh, and if you don't subscribe to that Ringer newsletter on MailChimp,

then you won't know when we start selling Ringer swag, dope T-shirts, dope baseball shirts, house caps. You don't, don't think for a second. I'm not getting it for free. I don't, I'm not worried about the payment. I'm getting in the closet today. I'm not walking. I'm not leaving here without some ringer swag. Well, when those are available, we'll be putting those on the newsletter as well. Uh, including a Tate special t-shirt that we're going to make fun. Oh no,

no, we're not going to do it. Thanks again, MailChimp. Again, go to MailChimp.com. They've been an awesome partner. You want to talk about Bryce Harper really quick? Sure. Is this the most fun athlete Washington has had in your lifetime? No, because Ovechkin, for a stretch there, until he was the leader,

the identity, the public face of a team that continues to lose in the second round of the playoffs. He was extremely exciting the first like five years of his arrival in Washington. And he is, you know, now has a legacy as a tremendous goal scorer and an all-timer in that category, just not able to get his team past the second round. I understand hockey is a team sport, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. But the first half of Ovechkin's career was very exciting in Washington. And on top of that, RG3's first year was extraordinary. And Washington is, more than anything, a football town.

So RG3's rookie season was stupendous. But Bryce is up there. Bryce is up there is one of your worst takes. It's terrible. Well, he's the National League MVP. Bryce is up there. He's 23. In his fourth year.

He's 23. He's the National League MVP. Bryce is up there. He's 23. In his fourth year. He's 23. He's already won an MVP. His OPS in 15 was 1.1. He's over 1,000 this year, too. Gets on base 45% of the time. Hits homers. It's fun to watch. He's trying to make baseball fun again.

Great public ambassador for the game. He's pissed off the old guys. He's breaking baseball code. I mean, I love the contrarian. You said, is he the best? I'm not ready to put him on a— I didn't say the best, but I mean, you know, I've had some good players. Have you ever been more excited about an athlete that you've had?

You're more excited for Robert Griffin than Bryce Harper? I mean, they made the playoffs in Griffin's first year year it was like i have 10 years of fun football in front of me now like after so griffin being in a football desert you have to understand yeah but you but you're basically saying the redskins being the most that's true the dc grudens do mean the most but um the thing about harper that is um so easy get behind, he has come through in the playoffs. He has big balls. He and Rendon were the only guys in that San Francisco series a couple years ago that really came to play, really showed up in that series. And he's always up for the moment, Harper.

That's something that makes him very easy very easy to love about him i really like him and i think the difference with baseball in 2016 versus what we grew up with in the era even like well it was like when we were young adults i would have assumed bryce harper was going to leave for the yankees red sox dodgers whoever now Now the way the small market teams, the medium market teams, and the non-gigantic teams, you can keep your player. You just give them a contract two, three years early, like what you did with Strasburg. Yes.

And I think Bryce Harper spends his first 15 years in Washington. I mean, maybe at some point they'll decide it won't make sense. But at some point they're just going to give him like 320 million dollars for 10 years right oh i i they could give him 500 million i'd be fine with it that's just gonna happen i don't care i look you know from your from your mouth to scotty boris's ears you know this is the thing that's really interesting about washington and the free agents you know that the the learners the learner family who owns the franchise have a relationship with scott boris yeah and now you know they they they got the payoff for um sitting strasburg out of the playoffs in 2012 i'll never forgive the franchise for doing

that because i think it did compromise uh their legitimate shot and winning the world series pursuing the world series but you know um at least they got the payoff for it. And you were okay with that contract? Well, the local writer. Oh, the contract's great. What are you talking about? For Strasburg? Yeah. It's a great contract.

It's cheaper than Price and the dude on the Cubs. Right. Yeah. Lester. Yeah, Lester, right. I mean, it's a market comparable kind of contract. And he was a free agent this year? After this year.

Right. He's in his walk year. So basically he grabbed the security of the 175 over getting all the way through the season, hoping you stay healthy, and then whatever. I feel like I would have done that. Well, you know, the real risk for somebody like Strasburg, he's been having an awesome season already, would be like another catastrophic injury. That's the only sort of risk. And I'm sure he's insured out the wazoo against that.

It's so tough to get big contracts like that insured because the insurance company, I mean, people have been writing about this you'd be like oh i'm insured for 100 million and then oh my knee got hurt pay me the 100 million the insurance well you have a predispose and they tried all these ways to get out of it well i think bryce is interesting though because bryce it's so it's so much harder for an everyday player to get seriously hurt right and he could he could just say, you know what? Oh, they're offering me 320? I'm just going to wait it out.

I think I might be able to get five. I don't think he's there. There's no question in my mind that they've had some chats, that Scotty Boris and the learners have had some chats. What number would you lock up Bryce for right now? 500. I would give him 10 years, 500 million. 12 years sure 12 years 500 million i just lock him down 50 million dollars a year i you know the baseball economics continue to trend in in one direction and it's up up all of the local tv deals continue to um prove out that people like to watch regional, local baseball.

Your interview with Bud Selig on Monday, all credit to him in terms of the increased interest that's been generated from the wild card. So to me, the economics, I don't pay him whatever it is. I don't care how much it costs to pay the kid. I want him around for 10 or 15 years. I like when we talk Washington sports because sometimes the Washington Post writes about it on their sports blog. Because they like when national audiences talk about Washington sports. They might leave this one out.

So, no, we're ranking the Nats first. In what? Just like in the power rankings. Okay. Nats first? Sure. Yeah, of course. Yes.

Did D.C. Gruden second? They're second. They're second? They're second because... Is there optimism with the D.C. Grudens? I'm mad at the Caps. The Caps by performance and record... You knew it was coming.

Mother F me. You knew it was coming, though. Stick it right in my rear hole. You knew it was coming. I'm so bitter about it, though. How did you not know it was going to happen? That's the Caps. That's what they do.

My boy Danny Steinberg has a Mad Libs version of Washington. I love that. I saw that. It was great. And this one, he needs to add in a line for the failed Russian player. The Russian player who was great all season long and then came in and sucked in the playoffs. This year it was Kuznetsov, the leading scorer for the team, scored two points in the playoffs.

I mean, seriously. Yeah. So they're third. They're third. But your guard's up with them for life, though. With this current iteration. It's always up. No, you talked yourself into it.

They were dominant during the regular season. There was no great East team. You were talked in. There was no great East team, and then there was. And then the Pens. Pittsburgh has been unbelievable. When did that start, and how did we not have money on it? Yeah, the latter question is the important question.

I thought we had hockey friends. Where the hell is Weinberg when you need him? Weinberger? Yeah. I knew after the San Jose beat the Kings that I should bet on them to win the cup, and I didn't. And I'm kind of glad I didn't because I think Pittsburgh is just going to roll unless Crosby gets another concussion or something stupid happens. No, Crosby isn't even the one. They have this stark line that's been dominant.

No, I know. But they're great. Pittsburgh's great. They're great. Speed is where it is in hockey now. Speed kills. The Kings weren't fast enough. You need speed, you need four defensemen, and you need a competent goalie.

That's really, for the Caps, what happened. They had a combination of injury, and Orpik got suspended for the cheap shot in game one or two. The Kings had two defensemen, and that's what sunk them. It's just too hard because you can only play your best two, 30 to 32 a game. You still got the other 28 to deal with, and they just had bad guys. So in fourth place is the Wizards.

And you just spent $7 million a year on Scotty Brooks, which is a good way for us to go out on. Why? So I can curse? $7 million a year on Scotty Brooks, which is a good way for us to go out on. Why? So I can curse? $7 million a year. You went from Randy Whitman to Scott Brooks. You'd have an entire decade of terrible NBA coaching on your team. I don't really care about the money. It doesn't affect the salary cap. It's Ted Leone. It's his money. He can spend it however he likes. The thing that I find challenging in terms of my fandom is they signed up Scotty Brooks before knowing what was going to shake out with the rest of the teams and the teams in the playoffs. The Frank Vogel type of guys?

The coaching market. Dave Jaeger and Frank Vogel both came available basically a week after. And the number of texts on my phone right now that say, would you like, do you think that Frank Vogel would be a good coach in Washington? How do you feel about Dave Jaeger? And it's like, well, we're going to roll with Scotty Brooks. We're rolling with Scotty. For $7 million a year.

Jaeger got four a year in Sacramento. Come on. Scotty Brooks must make twice rolling with Scotty. For $7 million a year. Yeager got four a year in Sacramento. Come on. Scotty Brooks must make twice as much money as him. I mean, he's not a terrible coach. I shouldn't have said that. No, no, no, no, no. But, you know, I've kind of seen that play before with old Scotty. I guess the only thing I would feel half decent about is just that I thought

Billy Donovan was terrible all season and actually became confident during the playoffs and some sort of light bulb went off and maybe that'll happen with Scott Brooks. I don't know. Fingers crossed. Bradley Beal banged up. Max deal Bradley Beal. He's going to get a max deal anyway. He can't stay in the court.

They're going to give him a max deal anyway. He's 22. Like five years, 150. Yes. Really? Whatever it is. That's going to go so badly with John Wall. That's what's going to give him a max deal anyway. He's 22. Like five years, 150? Yes. Really? Whatever it is. That's going to go so badly with John Wall. Well, that's what's going to happen.

Do you worry that John Wall goes to Cavs games with Rich Paul? Look, John Wall, this past season, for the first time in his time in Washington, started expressing, it was very sort of quiet. Subtle, yes. But a little bit of dissatisfaction with the direction of the team yeah and his role on the team why would he not like the direction of the team you you have an incompetent front office and they've overpaid coaches that aren't that good and don't really make any great trades what's wrong why is he complaining

is the nay coming back this is hurtful to me complaining? Is Nene coming back? This is hurtful to me. No, Nene's not coming back. They have six players. You have a farewell for Nene for us? You know what? I will not miss his missed fourth quarter free throws. That's one thing I am not going to miss with Nene.

So long for that by Nene. But he did restore an air of professionalism at a moment when the franchise was at its all time. I love Johnny's use of nadir. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, you know, we had Swaggy P, Nick Young, The Clown Show, McGee. And who was the other? Jordan Crawford was also part of that mix.

You had a whole bunch of those guys. Yeah, right. We had a whole bunch of... And Andre Blotch. Yeah. Oh, Andre. I'm calling him Blotch. I know it's Blotch, but I'm calling him Blotch.

He's a Blotch on your Wizards decade. That was a bad time. And then they came and John Wall arrived and there was like a semblance of professionalism. You had a gun incident in your locker room. We're not talking about it. I'm done. Gilbert had a nice... I think Gilbert's gotten shortchanged in the history of the NBA.

He had a nice little two-year run there. It's going to be a great... Really fun two, three years. A great look-back story. I mean, he was right on the brink of becoming... So good. He was incandescent. So good.

He was. He was really fun to watch. I enjoyed him. And then he hurt his knee. You're probably in the lottery again next year. Probably. Did you have a lottery pick this year um phoenix got it for what trade uh marquise oh no you don't like that look now they got the 13

slot so who knows who's available at 13 and whether that will good dude will translate into somebody i like i kind of like marquise but why not give up a first-round pick for him, and yet Tobias Harris was just sitting there for free? It's a great question. You know who I've been on this podcast 50 times begging for Channing Frye, begging the franchise to look at Channing Frye, the franchise that wanted to rebrand itself as a space and pace, pace and space.

Do you like a professional three-point shooter? A 6'8", 6'9", 6'10 guy who's awesome at the pick and roll. Demonstrated proven expertise at that. And, you know, anyway. So would you rate this? Is this a typical Washington sports season? Slightly better than usual? Slightly worse than usual? Typical.

Typical Washington. Although, you know what? The Nats, we had the Caps in the playoffs. The D.C. Grudens made the playoffs. I like the trajectory for the Nats this upcoming season playoffs-wise. And the almost bullets were right on the brink of making the playoffs. It was never really serious, but they weren't that far out. But I'm just saying,

we might have a season coming up here where all four teams in Washington, that would be a nice nut to crack. Congratulations on almost making the playoffs. Thanks to Stamps.com. Stop relying on the post office.

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and we're going to have some good people on that one too we'll be back tomorrow thank you podcast 100 oh and thanks to Joe House podcast 100 we kept it 100 And we're going to have some good people on that one, too. We'll be back tomorrow. Thank you. Podcast 100. Oh, and thanks to Joe House. Podcast 100. We kept it 100. Started from the bottom. Now we're here.

100. October the 1st to May 19th. Started from the bottom. Now we're here. Started in the back of my house. And now we're actually in an office with a cardboard cutout of Patrick Swayze from Roadhouse staring at us. Yeah, bring it. So we made it. All right.

Thanks for the first 100. Thanks for everybody for spreading the word. Talk to you in a minute.