The Bill Simmons Podcast - Ep. 105: NBA Finals and Internet Deep Dives With Joel Solomon, Brendan Lynch and Pat Barker

Episode Date: June 10, 2016

HBO and The Ringer's Bill Simmons brings on 3 'Any Given Wednesday' writers to discuss Stephen Curry's Finals no-show (so far), Kevin Love's trade value (16:00), 2016 Team USA options (28:00), J.R. t...echnical foul goading strategies for Draymond (37:00) and Brendan's fetish for bizarre internet deep dives (52:00). Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Today's episode of Friday Rolling on the BS Podcast is brought to you by SeatGeek, our presenting sponsor and the only fan-friendly app for buying and selling tickets for sports and music. Other sites have the nasty habit of showing you lower prices and charging you huge fees at checkout. At SeatGeek, the price you see is always the price you pay. Download the free SeatGeek app or go to SeatGeek.com. Today's podcast is also brought to you by Starry Station, the world's best touchscreen router for blazing fast Wi-Fi.
Starting point is 00:00:30 Lord, I wish we had this in our Any Given Wednesday ringer offices because we do not have blazing fast Wi-Fi. It's designed to give you a better and smarter way to stream and surf throughout your home. It even has parental controls. God, I need those too. And easy ways to make support calls. Say goodbye to Wi-Fi problems and blinking lights. Control your Wi-Fi on your own. Learn more about Starry Station at starry.com. Don't forget to check out theringer.com. We are in day 10.
Starting point is 00:01:03 Could not be happier with this site. We're still hiring people. It's been awesome. Check it out. Check us out on Twitter at ringer. Any given Wednesday, my new HBO show, which they're just not promoting enough in my opinion. I don't feel like they're running the ads enough and I haven't seen any billboards. That's launching Wednesday, June 22nd, 10 p.m.
Starting point is 00:01:27 No Joe House today, but we're still going to Friday roll with Adam. Let's go. Yeah. Clear enough for you. All right. All right. As I mentioned, I have a show launching soon. Can you picture us rolling?
Starting point is 00:01:47 We have to hire writers when you have a television show. I have three of them in my office right now. Two of them are going to be on the podcast. One of them is just going to stare at them and we might bring them in at one point. But on the podcast right now, Joel Solomon and Pat Barker. Joel wears a Yankee hat to the office every day. It's like you're trying to deliberately defy me and everything I stand for, but that's fine. We'll get into that. I have to have my thing, I feel. Yeah, you do.
Starting point is 00:02:12 It's your thing. You're like, I'm a Yankee fan. I'm not going to change for you or anybody else. I'm not going to dance for the man. I get it. I'll be consistent. Season two, maybe. We'll see.
Starting point is 00:02:21 All right. And then Pat Barker, a diehard Philly fan. Somehow we ended up with like six Philly fans between the TV show and The Ringer. Although you hate the Eagles. Hate the Eagles. Yeah. Yeah. Strong Philly sixers.
Starting point is 00:02:35 How are you a Philly fan, but you hate the Eagles? Because I grew up surrounded by Eagles fans. Yeah. And they're just, they're awful people. Wow. Okay. They're just, yeah, hot take number one. Eagles fans are just, they're just awful people. Wow. Okay. They're just, yeah, hot take number one. Eagles fans are just, they're brutal.
Starting point is 00:02:47 Well, I think what it really was is I was a baseball fan prominently in a football town. Okay. And, you know, I would go to Phillies games with 15,000 people in the vet. It's empty. They're getting their asses kicked. And the fans are chanting E-A-G-L-E-S, Eagles. And I just built this disdain for the the eagles and and specifically their fans and many of whom are my friends my
Starting point is 00:03:12 family and i just i hate that aspect about them i hate eagles fans collectively wow it's the it's a scorching hot take uh we also never gonna be welcome back we have brendan lynch here who wears uh one of two giant hats every day. He does not have a mic because we only have three mics. We're going to bring him later as a closer. So you have like 35, 40 minutes to think about a great story that you want to tell. He's nodding. He doesn't have a microphone.
Starting point is 00:03:38 No Joe House today is playing golf. Huge shoes to fill. This is... God. Yeah. Come on, Joe House. It's Friday rolling. We're Friday rolling here.
Starting point is 00:03:45 We have game four of the NBA finals tonight. I want to talk about that first, and we have some topics we want to hit. The Warriors are getting points tonight. The Warriors are one and a half point underdogs. They won 73 games. They came back from 3-1 against OKC. They have a better team. They killed Cleveland in the first two games.
Starting point is 00:04:06 They didn't play well in Game 3. Cleveland's the all-time front-running team. And now the Warriors are not favored in Game 4. Your thoughts? Well, I mean, the line doesn't reflect what Vegas actually thinks as much as what they expect people to bet. And if you watched Game 3, it's easy to think that this is a brand new series.
Starting point is 00:04:28 Kevin Love is out. They're in Cleveland. The momentum alone made it look like they looked like two completely different teams. It was like a body switch. What do you think, Joe? Home court has been crazy throughout the NBA playoffs. It's like different teams when they're at home. But I've never seen anything like the NBA playoffs. It's like different teams when they're at home. But I've never seen anything like the NBA playoffs
Starting point is 00:04:46 where between two days, the media, fans, just completely pivot. It's unbelievable. And that is why, I mean, yes, these are still the Warriors. Steph is definitely someone that I would worry about right now. What's wrong with Steph? Is it injuries? Is he just hitting a cold streak?
Starting point is 00:05:03 But they're still the Warriors. It's still the same same team they could easily come out tonight and win by 20 probably not but well and Cleveland also has because of just something about them when they're up 15 they look like one of the five greatest teams they basically turn into the Showtime Lakers crossed with the 2016 Warriors but it always happens when they're up between 15 and 22 points, and J.R. Smith's just firing away. Kyrie's doing his thing. It's funny because the Warriors sometimes play better when they're down 10. Not when they're getting blowed out, but when they're in that 10-minute... Yeah, they need to get slapped in the face when they rally.
Starting point is 00:05:41 They just didn't do it in game three. The Cavs have a lot of momentum guys. When momentum is on their side, Kyrie looks unstoppable. J.R. Smith. Even LeBron. LeBron gets passive, I feel like, when they're behind. And when they're ahead, he's in attack mode. He's going to the basket.
Starting point is 00:05:55 And when they're behind, you know, he'll get the ball, hold it for six seconds, and then give it to J.R. Smith. Coming out on that 9-0 run was, like, huge for the Cavs. A little bit of confidence that swagger they the Cavs need it where sometimes the Warriors just don't doubt themselves but the Cavs I think really need to come out strong have a lead yeah well so a couple things just historically you know the Warriors have been in the conversation with the 86 Celtics you know the 96 Bulls the 87 Lakers some of the all-time great teams the 86 Celtics were never know, the 96 Bulls, the 87 Lakers, some of the all-time great teams.
Starting point is 00:06:26 The 86 Celtics were never underdogs in a playoff game. I'm just throwing that out there first. Never happened. Never would have happened. Same thing for the 96 Bulls. I don't remember in Seattle in the finals, the 96 Bulls like getting two points. Well, they didn't have Timothy Mozga.
Starting point is 00:06:41 So, I mean, the game changer. So that was one thing the other thing is i think there's some i don't like the hot take culture and the people overreacting this stuff i think it's weird that steph hasn't played a good finals game yet we are now a week into the finals and i think it might have been game two and he just got in a foul trouble and he was never able to get in all of a sudden they're 20, and he just never got in the flow. But in a weird way, this is kind of a statement game for him. I think he has to play well tonight.
Starting point is 00:07:11 I agree. I mean, the thing about games one and two is that they won by such a large margin that you're able to look at it and be like, wow, they won, and Steph didn't even have to get going. Right. And then in game three, when you lose by 30, it's like, well, they lost because Steph didn't get going. But he was, I mean, his body language was terrible.
Starting point is 00:07:27 He had a weird look on his face. He's been awful. Steve Kerr was asking him on the bench, are you okay? Right. Which is troubling, you know, with a back-to-back MVP that you even have to ask that. But yeah, he did. Like, you guys saw me on the test show on Tuesday. My body language was great.
Starting point is 00:07:42 It was on point. None of you guys were like, is he okay? Is he alright? I was ready for the test show. Steph Curry, it's like, this is the finals. There's 20 million people watching. What are you doing? So here's my theory, because I know one of the things we want to talk about today is what's wrong with Steph Curry and is he overrated?
Starting point is 00:07:58 Was that one of your... Certainly not my take. Pat's our hot take artist. I'm the hot take guy. I don't even think Steph Curry is that good at basketball. Okay, great. Cut his mic. Just cut it. I believe the question was, is he a choke artist?
Starting point is 00:08:13 Is he unclutch? Here's a hot take, internet. Steph Curry is the Peyton Manning of basketball. Are we ready to go there? He won a title last year. Yeah, so did Peyton Manning. They both won we ready to go there? He won a title last year. Yeah, so did Peyton Manning. They both won. The parallels are eerie, Bill.
Starting point is 00:08:29 I have a theory. The new shoe that was coming out, The Chef, which took a beating on the internet yesterday. Do you think he saw it? Maybe he didn't see that shoe until like a week ago. And they sent him like,
Starting point is 00:08:42 hey man, here's the shoes, man. Here's what it looks like. And he was like, oh my God my god i'm gonna take a beating on the internet he's playing just got in his head he's playing like a guy who knows that that is his shoe yeah and like that i'm dead serious is it possible he's freaked out about the shoe between that and the uh instagram girl sitting row one he has a lot on his mind that the wife didn't like that there's no way that had to have come up at the curry house there's no way well the other thing they quietly mentioned last round that he got a shot in his elbow before game six so that tells me his elbow is actually like really bad because my whole philosophy on um when somebody injects things
Starting point is 00:09:24 into your body, either they're doing it as a preventive measure or because you're in pain. Those are really the two, unless you have a heroin problem. Brennan, is there any other reason to get injected? No. Brennan says no. Dynamite dropping. It's great.
Starting point is 00:09:42 He's here all podcast. But yeah, that tells me he's hurt and he's got, what was the other injury he had? Well, he started with the ankle and then he had the knee. Oh, the knee. And then the elbow. But I thought last round, because I was convinced he was hurt. And then when I went to game five against OKC and I was watching him cut around the picks and say, he's fine.
Starting point is 00:10:03 Like, his knee's fine. But that's where I think is the problem in this series. Steph usually can create his own shots. With Klay, you get him on his spot and he's a marksman. With Steph, so far, I just don't think he can create his own shots. These are long guys. LeBron's quick. Jefferson's playing him tight.
Starting point is 00:10:25 And maybe that. Jefferson. Which him tight. And maybe that... Jefferson. Which is insane. Which is crazy. The Warriors had to give first round picks to Utah to take Jefferson away three years ago. And now he's like the third best player in the Cavs. There's always someone in the...
Starting point is 00:10:39 Iguodala last year, someone always steps up. Now this year, Jefferson, who who by the way luke walton played with at arizona and now is going to be the head coach of the lakers i know they were like buddies there were weird yacht photos of them remember there was that one sports blog moment like eight years ago they're on yachts wearing like weird rich guy clothes they took like a two day beating pat remembers pat remembers all sports blog moments. I'm a big yacht guy, so anything involving yachts is pretty much my wheelhouse. Do you think Curry, like everybody's been chipping him for four rounds? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:11:12 You know, and I was watching it. I really noticed it just being at that one game, and it was like anytime he came around to pick, somebody was throwing the elbow out, throwing the knee out, banging him, hitting him on picks, trying to blindside pick him. And I do wonder, maybe he's not built to take that kind of beating. Like MJ, LeBron, guys like that, they're like battering rams. LeBron just comes in, he comes in, he's never hurt. Maybe Curry's just breaking down.
Starting point is 00:11:37 Yeah, well, I don't think that teams played him particularly physically during the season. A couple teams, the Clippers did, the Celtics did, and that was really it. Yeah, and the Celtics, other than Oklahoma City, had probably the most success against them this year. So yeah, I think it's a cumulative effect of getting bumped around for four series, suffering legitimate injuries, and not being able to get a rhythm going. He just hasn't played the kind of minutes that you would during the regular season. Every night he was, you know, he was for the first three quarters getting a rhythm going.
Starting point is 00:12:12 And I just feel like he hasn't been able to do that in the playoffs. I feel like you have something sarcastic to say and you're holding back. I don't want you to hold back, Joel. You have a comment. This Curry hate. Oh, that's what you're mad at, Pat. He did it all all season tonight he could very well drop 40 and and that and that's why you're he's probably banged up it would help
Starting point is 00:12:32 if clay if clay showed up in this series that would that would certainly help so here's the case for the warriors just the way they're built they're constructed that if they play five games in one of those five games clay is going to be awesome and in one of those five games, Klay is going to be awesome. And in one of those five games, Steph is going to be awesome. And then there's like a 50% chance that in that third game,
Starting point is 00:12:52 Steph and Klay together are going to be awesome. So just law of averages say one of those guys is going to be awesome today. And this is what we said. I think it was House before game six. And I was saying like, OKC is a better team, but with Golden State,
Starting point is 00:13:06 the one variable you can't predict is, are those guys going to go off? They're just due to go off in this series. The fact that Clay or Steph, nor Steph, nor Steph? Clay nor Steph? I think it's nor. Nor?
Starting point is 00:13:19 Clay nor. Clay nor Steph has gotten hot in the finals yet is kind of an anomaly. Yeah, but didn't we say the same thing after three games last year? Specifically about Steph? After three games, everybody was like, oh, he's due. Game four is the one he's going to go off. And then he's due.
Starting point is 00:13:35 Game five is the one where he's due. And he never really, I mean, you know, game six, a little bit. So you're really convinced he's the Peyton Manning of the NBA, even though he knows how to win a title. I mean, that might be a little hot takey, but I think it's a fair question. I think it's a fair question to ask where there's smoke, is there fire? If it was just this year, you could chalk it up to the injuries. I feel like last year he didn't have that excuse.
Starting point is 00:13:59 It's not just Peyton Manning. There have been athletes historically who do not perform as well in championship games. He could be one. I'm not saying he definitively is. I'm just saying it's not unreasonable to ask. They're just bored in Cleveland, guys. Let's be honest. This is a long road.
Starting point is 00:14:13 They got through Oklahoma City. That's a good theory. Maybe just on the road at OKC, fall away on the road at Cleveland. You just get sad. That's a rough stretch. What are you going to do? That's a rough stretch. Hey, guys going to do? That's a rough stretch. Hey, guys, you want to go to Morton's again?
Starting point is 00:14:29 There's not a lot going on in Cleveland. And there's less going on in OKC. It's possible. The other thing I do actually think, no joking, I would worry about tonight. I'm curious to see what you think. If Draymond gets a technical, if somehow the Cavs rile him up
Starting point is 00:14:45 and they lose, going back to Golden State, or if somehow Draymond does get that second technical and gets benched a game, I mean, that would be trouble. Now you have Brennan's attention because in a sports movie,
Starting point is 00:15:01 they would send like the 12th man out. James Jones. Or Dante Jones. One of the Joneses just goes out and just tries to hockey fight Draymond, basically. Yeah. That's a good move. I think that's brilliant.
Starting point is 00:15:16 Yeah, that would be a great move. Is Cleveland smart enough to do that? I mean, when they sent in James Jones at the end of game two, which was a blowout, Steph was still in the game for some reason there was about six minutes left and the first thing James Jones did when he got in there was knock Steph down on a hard screen yeah and that's not a coincidence and they pulled Steph out immediately so yeah I think uh if if James Jones has to be the enforcer of the team I I say go for it absolutely do you still have Tyronn Lue's number in that cell phone? Tyronn Lue, I guarantee KG, who is, I think Tyronn Lue is either his best friend or his
Starting point is 00:15:51 second best friend. I bet he's in Ty Lue's ear being like, go and stay there, pussies. Gotta bang them around. Send James Jones out to get Draymond in a fight. What a spot for Ty Lue, though. This is huge. Hold on. I want to talk about 5-4 Club.
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Starting point is 00:16:21 Yeah. I didn't know I had the option. Yeah. Oh, you have the option. Are you lazy? Would you say you're lazy shoppers? Look at me. I was late for this podcast.
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Starting point is 00:17:05 Get 50% off your first package. You get $120 worth of clothing for $30 for your first month's package. They mailed me some. Actually, I think on Wednesday, I wore a little 5-4-Club in the office. Yeah, so check that out. 5-4-Club. Let's go through your topics. We hit Steph Curry a little bit sure what was that the next one
Starting point is 00:17:27 was kevin love yeah i we were we were talking about the other day what would you do if you're the calves and kevin love is cleared to play game four what how do you use them what do you do joel what's your answer i which is what's gonna happen you know come come off the bench which is probably lucky for the calvess right now. Shockingly, they didn't do it in game one. Pat has a different take. I don't let him in the building. I tell him to just stay away.
Starting point is 00:17:55 You tell him the time of the game has been changed? Yeah, absolutely. We need to tear it in the stadium. We're going to play this tomorrow now, Friday. I would go all out on whatever lie it takes to keep Kevin Love away. Maybe have his limo driver just make a wrong turn and end up in Cincinnati or something. I don't want him. If I'm the Cavs, unless he's the guy who's going to come in and mess with Draymond Green,
Starting point is 00:18:18 unless you want him taking the James Jones role, I have no role for him. They're a better team without him on the floor. But we knew this before the finals. Well, what's done is done, Bill. I have no role for him. They're a better team without him on the floor. But we knew this before the finals. Well, what's done is done, Bill. I don't coach the team. I'm telling you. I was saying, I was tweeting a little bit during game two. I was just like, they're going to get swept if they don't emphasize defense a little more.
Starting point is 00:18:39 And you can't play Kevin Love and Kyrie at the same time in this series. Because the Golden State, the ball movement, they're just going to keep getting open threes. They won both of those games by 20-plus, and they didn't even play well. So you have to fix that. And you had the litmus test of two games in the regular season. Last year's finals, even Stephen Adams, Oklahoma City, if Mozgov could be Stephen Adams light,
Starting point is 00:19:00 or without the tattoos and the mustache. You love Mozgov. I really do. He's running around like Frankenstein. He's like Drago. He said a nice cheap pick on Klay Thompson, though. Oh, that was not cheap. Everyone was like, oh, that's not cheap.
Starting point is 00:19:15 That's basketball. It's like, that's not a place on the court where you said a pick. By the way, how much do you love at one point in that game? It was four Knicks and I believe Kyrie Irving on the floor. Oh, yeah. It was like Shumpert, Mozgov, J.R. Smith. It was like, yeah. And there's one more.
Starting point is 00:19:33 There's Knicks spread everywhere. But this was, I mean, it is weird. Like who was the better general manager, Phil Jackson or LeBron? Because LeBron is now winning with these guys, whereas Carmelo, not so much. Well, so that's the fundamental problem with this team is, first of all, that LeBron's the GM. I'm pretty sure he's not qualified to be a GM. But he also, when he went there, he put together a team
Starting point is 00:19:58 that was based on what was succeeding from, like, 2007 to 2013. He put together, like, a past tense contender. He didn't realize that the league was changing. So you trade Wiggins for Love. I think LeBron, in whatever iteration of basketball this is now, he has to be a four. To play him at small forward is idiotic. Actually, you could talk me into him being a five.
Starting point is 00:20:25 Yeah. You can't have him and Kevin love on the court at the same time. And then also play Tristan Thompson. It's like, that's basketball from 2009. So this love thing and Jonathan jerks did a good job of writing about it in the ringer yesterday. This love thing pushed LeBron to the four,
Starting point is 00:20:41 which is where he should have been playing against a team like golden state anyway. And that's, I don't feel like this is Kevin Love's fault as much as it's just the team he's on. They have too many power forwards and not enough perimeter guys. Here's why I feel like it is at least partially Kevin Love's fault. We know what Kevin Love is as a defender. So I'm not going to blame Kevin Love for being a poor defender.
Starting point is 00:21:02 He's always been one that's, you know, not his fault. You blame him for getting concussed? Absolutely. Get your head out of the way. No, I blame him for, in games one and a half, not doing what he's capable of offensively. He was taking the ball to the rack. He was the biggest player down there, and he wasn't finishing.
Starting point is 00:21:21 He wasn't hitting threes. He wasn't finishing from under the basket. So it's like, if you don't offer me anything defensively, and on top of that, now you don't offer me anything offensively, seriously, what good are you? I don't understand what the argument for having him in the game at any point is. Well, this is where maybe coming off the bench, and I do like your theory, keeping him out of the building, but if they need him, coming off the bench, if Cleveland is struggling scoring, it is a lot to ask of these guys.
Starting point is 00:21:50 When they're scoring 70 points, they're not going to beat Golden State. So maybe coming off the bench, you're right, if he can put points on the board, that's where Love maybe does help in these games where Cleveland can't get offense going. Well, especially if they put the ball in his hands. I've been thinking about this a lot because I'm worried that the Celtics are going to panic trade for him. And then I talk myself into the panic trade, and then I talk myself out of it.
Starting point is 00:22:15 And, you know, the guy was so good in Minnesota a couple years ago. You wanted him in Boston, right? I still kind of want him in Boston because I think about all the shots that Jared Sollinger took and missed on the Celtics. These wide open threes at the top of the key that the Stevens offense slash and kick just creates these great shots for big guys. And none of the big guys in the Celtics could make them.
Starting point is 00:22:36 We had a clinic, you had a mere Johnson, you had Sollinger. I like none of them were really great. Three point shooters. A linic was pretty good. That's about it. And then you put Kevin Love in that offense just in the Sollinger spot.
Starting point is 00:22:50 And you ask him to do everything they asked Sollinger to do. And I think he'd be successful. And I do think in basketball, it does matter your situation. Oh, sure. For sure. If you guys came to the TV show and you're comedy writers and we're like hey guys we want you to edit some bits that's what you guys are going to do in this show you'll be like i'm not good at this i'm i write comedy that's kind of what they've done to kevin love
Starting point is 00:23:16 they put him in the corner anytime they have him post up it's it's it almost seems like he's rusty like he can't oh he's like oh i got the ball i gotta do something and he's trying he's like he's rusty like he can't, he's like oh I got the ball I gotta do something and he's like he's trying too hard I think he's way in his own head and I think it's salvageable, I really do I think a change of scenery would be great for Kevin Love but I don't feel
Starting point is 00:23:37 like on Cleveland it's going to work you said before how bad he was just on the post-ups in the finals. The guy was a great post-up player in Minnesota. You put him on the block and he had a little fadeaway. He'd go baseline. He had a nice little running hook into the lane.
Starting point is 00:23:56 And now he's like a spaz. I don't know how you lose the ability to play in the low post. I think personally Kyrie isn't enough of a pass-first point guard to get him those shots. That's an understatement. Yeah. I mean, if LeBron was the primary ball handler, I think Kevin Love would be way better off because he could knock down
Starting point is 00:24:17 those shots. But I just don't think he fits into the LeBron-Kyrie mold. I just don't think... I think it's two really tough guys to play with when they're on the court together. He could end up being really good on Boston or even worse for the Knicks. And I'm rooting for the latter. How about Sixers? I love a good train wreck.
Starting point is 00:24:32 Sixers? No, we'll pass. You'll pass? Really? Yeah. On behalf of Jerry, we're going to take a hard pass on Kevin Love. The guy who comes out the best, by the way, is Jerry West. When Golden State, everyone's like, oh my gosh, of course you trade Clay Thompson.
Starting point is 00:24:48 And Jerry West reportedly gave such a hard no. He was like, listen, guys, you hired me to do one thing, no basketball. I appreciate that you're tech billionaires, but if you trade Clay Thompson, I'm out of here. I won't swear on your podcast. They spent like three months debating whether to do that trade or not. And there was like two camps. And Steve Carter was in the keep clay thing because the keep clay thing was like, this is like the most unbelievable advantage to have these two guys making threes.
Starting point is 00:25:20 And they're young and they're going to get better. And there's not a lot of two guards. But Kevin Love was one of the like 11 best players in the league on Minnesota. And they're offering them, you know, basically clay. The problem was Minnesota fucked it up. If Minnesota had,
Starting point is 00:25:35 because Minnesota wanted Harrison Barnes too. They want to play Thompson, Harrison Barnes and David Lee's contract. And Golden State was like, no way. I mean, if they had just been like clay and david lee for for love let's just do it right now that would have been an awesome trade for minnesota i mean
Starting point is 00:25:50 they would have had wiggins clay rubio towns a year later maybe they don't get towns i don't know well they they wouldn't have had uh oh yeah no i guess they will yeah i mean if they had looked down the lottery right and then you're here sitting with Craig Kilbourne talking about Minnesota Timberwolves in the finals. And not us. Have you seen his past on YouTube? The past? I hadn't seen it. When he brought that up, I didn't know what it was.
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Starting point is 00:27:22 Terms and conditions apply. Casper.com BS. You like your... I have one. You have one? Do you like it? It's great. Okay.
Starting point is 00:27:30 You know what? I figured out how to use Brendan here at the end. We asked him what his top, his last three internet deep dives were. Oh my God. That'll be great, right? I can't wait to hear that. That'll be great.
Starting point is 00:27:41 You think of that, Brendan. All right, what's next on our list of topics? Would you play for Team USA? I'm going to ask you first, Bill. Given the political climate and Zika virus and everything, would you play for Team USA? I'm a bad person to ask because I'm just terrified of viruses. And I'd be afraid to go. And I would come up with some fake excuse like Steph Curry did.
Starting point is 00:28:03 I'm banged up. I can't go. I'm not saying it was a fake excuse. But I'm saying it's the kind of excuse I would have used. Yeah, my ankle hurts. My knee hurts. I can't make it. I'm good, guys. I'm good.
Starting point is 00:28:14 Good luck. Good luck with the gold medals. Bring it home. Yeah. I'll be watching. I'll be cheering you. There's no way I would go there. The more people that are in one place, the more dangerous it is.
Starting point is 00:28:26 I think this whole thing's terrifying. There's probably not going to be many people at the Olympics. I went four years ago. It was the most people I've ever seen in my life, and they're all packed together. I don't know. It makes me super nervous. This is good for Spain. Spain is now excited to win the gold medal then.
Starting point is 00:28:43 Are we sure these guys are going to go? No. I'm just putting this out there. If nobody in the NBA wants to play, I will play. I came in prepared to discuss this as a hypothetical, but if it gets down to my spot on the roster, I'll go. I'm 5'8". I'm in terrible shape, but I could shoot 20% from three.
Starting point is 00:29:04 Pat got into wrestling take yesterday because he thinks if you are a Steph or I don't know who else dropped out. LaMarcus, I think. You're anti-American if you don't show up for Team USA. And that was if Tate had that. Virus or no virus? Virus or no virus. You're showing up. The anti-American Peyton Manning of basketball. One thing I was thinking,
Starting point is 00:29:25 if none of the NBA players want to go, we send the best celebrity players that we have, like Common, and the guy, Jesse Williams. The Biebs. Cameron. Yeah, Cameron. Like, we just, no Kevin Hart, because we won't win.
Starting point is 00:29:41 But we just send celebrities, and maybe that's the way to go. Or we just, like, maybe the just send celebrities and maybe that's the way to go. Or we just, like, maybe the worst team and maybe the Sixers have to go. This is your penance for tanking
Starting point is 00:29:51 the last three years. We're sending... I'd be excited to see the Sixers actually win a game. As a Sixers fan, that would be exciting to see Joel Embiid
Starting point is 00:29:58 beat up on Angola. I would get a kick out of that. First of all, you get hurt. Sure. You get hurt either in the practice
Starting point is 00:30:04 or it could be a Paul George injury, or you could actually get hurt during the game. Also, it's just kind of nice, especially if you're somebody who's played three or four rounds, like Durant, where you played for eight straight months. Why do I want to now go to the Olympics and compete and then rest for a month, and now I'm in the NBA season? I'd rather have the time off. Durant already won.
Starting point is 00:30:26 Unless you're like Westbrook who just wants to play. Westbrook's a cyborg. I'm not afraid of any virus. I'm going. I will play anywhere, anytime. Let's do it. Maybe we just send Westbrook and he just picks 11
Starting point is 00:30:41 of his friends. That's our Olympic team. If you're Anthony Davis, do you go? I go if I'm Anthony Davis. What else am I going to do? Does he have a bad shoulder? Yeah, so? And Carmelo.
Starting point is 00:30:54 Carmelo needs the win. I feel like Carmelo is building now to be the greatest Olympian of all time. That's his path. Five gold medals. Just like, I'll go be the Michael Phelps of USA basketball. Oh, that's his path just like i'll go be the michael phelps of usa basketball oh that's great i like that so then when people talk about uh how many gold medalists it's like him carl lewis michael phelps carmelo anthony and kurt angle yeah the greatest olympian and bruce jenner that's's Carmelo's powerful.
Starting point is 00:31:25 He won. He was pretty good. He was on a Wheaties box. How many American decathletes have actually won the gold medal? Brandon, you know this. No? Did Dan or Dave?
Starting point is 00:31:37 No, Dan and Dave didn't. Neither of those guys won. Well, so I like the idea of Westbrook, a couple shooters and like nine rebounders send the globe truck and it's like kobe's farewell game every single game westbrook just shooting 45 times and yelling at everybody and just walking around with that westbrook
Starting point is 00:31:57 just being mad i like your idea too of using the olympics as salvation for people who just can't get over like maybe we just send like dwight howard and carmelo and all for people who just can't get over. Maybe we just send Dwight Howard and Carmelo and all these guys who just can't. Kyle Lowry. Kevin Love. Kevin Love. It becomes redemption. Or guys who never won a ring. Maybe it's like a retirement send-off.
Starting point is 00:32:19 Those are the guys that get to. We'll send Kobe, too. What do you think about sending all retired players? I love that. That I love. Like, what if Karl Malone was representing us and people like that? I mean, we wouldn't win, but it would be fun. It would be fun.
Starting point is 00:32:32 Just like the senior NBA tour. MJ would be fun. MJ is a 53-year-old MJ. Back, I'm back. The bat signal just goes off. If you put Barkley on the team, I'm in. Would you send the D-League champions? I'd rather see the retired players.
Starting point is 00:32:49 College? Would you go 22 and under? Because that's where I think they should go with this anyway. I think it's... 22 and under is all pros. Everybody plays one year in college. So on the off chance that your one year happens during the Olympics, then sure. But everybody's one and done.
Starting point is 00:33:04 So yeah, if you want to go 22 and under NBA players, I'm all for that. Calipari doesn't want these guys going. They could get hurt. They're about to make millions. Send Towns. Send, who else could we send? Simmons. Devin Booker.
Starting point is 00:33:18 Like a bunch of those type of guys. Send Buddy. No, Buddy Heald. Buddy's too old. He's 27. How old is he? There was a great article on the ringer.com the other day you guys check out that's really sweet yeah like what it what was the worst team that we could send and still win the gold medal i voted for kobe and all rebounders yeah i think that's a fun a fun game to play
Starting point is 00:33:41 like uh not hypothetically play it in reality. Just try to get away with that. What do you think of both Lopez brothers being kind of the backbone of the team and just being goofy? Stories about how the Lopez brothers have taken over Olympic Village. They're beloved. Everyone loves them. They're so goofy. They arranged a screening of
Starting point is 00:33:59 Toy Story 3. They have all the pins. People love them. That's my dream podcast for the Ringer Podcast Network. Are the two Lopez brothers? Two Lopez brothers with a podcast every week. If the Lopez brothers are listening, you can have a podcast for us. Just email me. What would they talk about every week?
Starting point is 00:34:18 Hailing cabs in Brooklyn, maybe? Have you followed the Lopez brothers at all? I'm going to be honest. I'm uninformed on the Lopez brothers. Brooke went to Comic Con. They go to Comic Con. There's photos of Robin Lopez by himself at Disney World the day before Lakers game.
Starting point is 00:34:36 Just soloing down there and going on the rides and stuff. This seven foot guy next to all these little kids. They're like little kids that... They're like little kids that, they're like Josh Baskin and Big. If Josh Baskin and Big switched bodies with seven footers, that's who they are. So if they want a podcast, they're more than available.
Starting point is 00:34:55 So we got the Lopez brothers, we got Carmelo, we got Kobe. The Lopez brothers, Westbrook, Carmelo. Westbrook. And eight role guys, we're good. Carl Anthony Towns. We've built a great team. Colangelo. Kevin Love. Would you bring J.R. Smith to role guys. We're good. Carl Anthony Towns. We've built a great team. Colangelo.
Starting point is 00:35:05 Kevin Love. Would you bring J.R. Smith to start an international incident? Yes. Yes. He would. He'd have to. You need a wild card like the Barkley. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:35:15 J.R. Smith would be good. That's one of my predictions for tonight. Like if we make predictions that we don't know if they're actually going to happen, but just throwing them out there like 10 to 1 odds. The Warriors being up by 20 followed by J.R. Smith doing something horrible. Like shoving somebody into the basket support or a trip or like the time when he knocked out Jay Crowder. Because he'll do that three times a year.
Starting point is 00:35:38 He'll do something crazy that would not be legal in real life. I'd love to see him and Draymond get into it. I'm fired up from all the recent baseball fights. Yeah, that's your Draymond guy. With Medidor and Manny Machado and everything like that. That's what I want. If I could pick how the game ends tonight, I don't care who wins. I just want J.R. Smith and Draymond Green to throw hands.
Starting point is 00:35:59 Tate, how easy would it be to get Draymond upset in a technical on him? Wouldn't it take like five seconds? It's like one insult, right? Well, he's trying to get you to do that. So you're combating. You're going back and forth. So what J.R. Smith should do is he should get all this intel on Draymond, find out one girl in Draymond's life in the last five years that's like a sore spot.
Starting point is 00:36:24 Either some girl Draymond couldn't get or somebody that broke up with him or somebody who also had sex with another NBA player who's not as good as Draymond. Any of that, and you just go. You just bring that up second quarter. And you just get in his head and make him mad. And now he turns into Alpha Dog Draymond. That's what you need. I agree.
Starting point is 00:36:42 You got it right. Psychological warfare. He's now going need. I agree. Psychological warfare. This is where Brandon is now going to find that thing. What if he found Draymond's current girl and actually had sex with her before the game? In Brazil? Is she in Brazil?
Starting point is 00:36:57 What was the last topic we had to talk about? We got to talk about my boy Sam Hinckley. Make the case for Sam Hinckley. The case for Sam Hinckley is you bring in a guy who you ask him to completely overhaul everything. You ask him to tank. You ask him to lose on purpose and rebuild from the ground up. And then after two and a half years, you panic and fire him. That's insane.
Starting point is 00:37:22 That's insane to judge him by the results on the court when that wasn't his job. Nobody wanted him to win. They brought him in with the specific instruction, you are to lose and then he lost and they're like, you're a loser. Get out of here. That's crazy. So you're a hyncheologist. Absolutely. When I look at some of the GMs who
Starting point is 00:37:39 have had 8, 9, 10, 12 years, like in Utah, the guy's been there for 9 years. How does he get 9 years? Or the like uh like in utah the guy's been there for nine years like how does he get nine years the orlando guy yeah the orlando guy's been in the top seven for a hundred years that's that's what i'm saying and hinky as a philadelphia fan um i saw five years in a row where they were like a seven seed and they would go in and lose in six games i got sick of it i enjoyed the last three years because there was hope. There was hope for the future.
Starting point is 00:38:08 If he gets Carl Towns a year ago, he's a genius and the plan worked. Is he? Yeah, because Carl Towns is going to be like a three-time MVP. Right. No, I agree with that. But if you put Carl Towns on this year's Sixers, how many games do you think they would have won? I think they would have realized pretty quickly, this guy's
Starting point is 00:38:25 great, and we need to start building around him now. So you don't get upset with Hinckley that he was terrible at evaluating talent? That's the thing. He didn't really make any great picks. I'm not giving him a good grade. I'm giving him an incomplete
Starting point is 00:38:41 because to me he needed more time. But if you're going to do this whole thing where you're going to take guys who can't come over to America for two years and take big risks and take guys with broken feet, why do you take 22-year-old Michael Carter Williams over Giannis, the Greek freak who everybody, he was like 18. He was a potential guy.
Starting point is 00:39:02 He never knew. Why not just take all potential guys? Why do it both ways? That's the part I didn't get. Yeah, the MCW pick was inconsistent with the rest of the plan. I agree with that. I agree. It's the one that didn't make sense.
Starting point is 00:39:14 But on the surface, it's the only one that seemed to work out because he won Rookie of the Year. But I agree. I didn't vote for him. Do you have a vote? I have a vote. Fantastic. Not only did I not vote for him, but his agent got i have a vote fantastic and i voted not only did i not vote for him but his agent got salty about it really yeah and i'm like why do i have to vote for
Starting point is 00:39:30 somebody who put up stats on a terrible team how do i don't know if he's good right i forget who i voted for but it wasn't him i'm not voting for somebody on a 12 win team give me a break no i could you could start on a 12 win team the team The team's going to suck anyway. Who cares? You don't think Nerlens is good, right? I think Nerlens could be an effective defender. Could he be Bismack Biambo someday? Yeah, I think he could be better than Bismack Biambo. There's no evidence whatsoever to say that.
Starting point is 00:40:00 Joe, what do you think? The Sixers need to trade this pick. That we know for sure. We need to trade it for two second rounders. That's our blueprint. There's no sure thing. So I always look at it like, what would Belichick do? I think Belichick has played this stuff as well as anybody.
Starting point is 00:40:18 He's always figured out how to move back, how to pick up more picks, how to get as many chances as you can. Why wouldn't they just move backwards two spots with the Celticsics who are just desperate to take all these dumb picks they have and overpay for something? Why not move back two spots? Take Jamal Murray, who's shooting the lights out and all these things. He made 79 of 103s in his Boston workout. You get 3, 16, 23, 31, 35. We just overpay for it.
Starting point is 00:40:44 And then you have all these chances to get lucky, I mean look at the draft last year, Devin Booker fell to 13 Miles Turner fell to 11 Justice Winslow fell to 10, like these guys are great NBA, are gonna be great NBA starters
Starting point is 00:40:59 I guess it depends on how you evaluate Ben Simmons if you're drinking the Ben Simmons Kool-Aid, you take him, number one. But for the team you have, he makes no sense unless you got rid of three of the guys you already took. And the Sixers need multiple players. Yeah, you need perimeter guys. The whole league has gone toward the perimeter. That's another thing with the hinky people.
Starting point is 00:41:20 The whole league went to the perimeter and shooters and creators and guys like Curry and Clay Thompson and all these dudes. And yet he's just taking these guys from 15 years ago. That makes sense. That's a part nobody's been able to explain that part to me. Except for Nick Stoskis. That's true. Give him credit on that one. We did get Nick Stoskis.
Starting point is 00:41:39 That's the hot sauce. So how did the hynchaeologist explain that part? If he was such a genius, why didn't he seem to have any idea where basketball was going? Well, I feel like you could argue that Dario Saric could fill that role. I mean, everybody looks at the picks that are here. It's easy to forget about Dario Saric. He's a forward, too. Yeah, but he—
Starting point is 00:42:02 He played the exact same position as Ben Simmons. Joel's making a confused face all these i didn't even know that guy sorry that says enough in itself i liked him in the we i did that draft that year for espn he was one of my favorite prospects because he's fiery he's one of those he's like uh you know those europeans that they make the shot and they look turn to the crowd and they do European bad guy things. He's got a little of that. But so did Andre Bargnani.
Starting point is 00:42:29 The solution at this point, you trade Okafor for D'Angelo Russell. You know the Lakers don't want to deal with the D'Angelo Russell headache anymore. So you get smaller that way. You keep Noel. You bring one of the worst locker room chemistry guys of the past five years. He's like 19.
Starting point is 00:42:45 That's your plan. He's 20. He's fine. He learned. He learned from that. He'll never use Snapchat to break up a teammate's relationship again. If he does that twice, I would be very surprised. If he does that again, then yeah. He'll never do that again.
Starting point is 00:42:58 I will come back on the podcast and admit that you were a genius. If he uses Snapchat to expose somebody's infidelity two times, then yeah, I'm with you. But otherwise, you trade Okafor for Russell, you draft Ben Simmons, and... Okafor for Russell's on the table? It's on my table. I don't have access to
Starting point is 00:43:18 their notes, but that's what I would do. Couldn't they have just drafted him then to begin with? Yes, they could have. It's called revisionist history. How much does the Porzingis thing hurt the hinky? Yeah, terribly. Porzingis is like if you were creating a stretch five
Starting point is 00:43:33 in a fucking lab, you would create Porzingis. He's 7'3", he's got 25 foot range, and he's tough. A stud. Future of the NBA in line with... Are you a forget uh it depends okay what if if if got dolan's just ruined basketball in new york like even like diehard nicks fans are like i i mean i hope they do well i just i'm just so being rude for a team run by by j. and the Straight Shooters.
Starting point is 00:44:06 Straight Shot? Straight. Do you feel like we as a society have failed to get the word out that James Dolan is in a blues band and sings? I know people know it, but I don't know if people know it. It is something that is going to have to be on our show. That's what our show is for. I've written several scripts. Everyone features J.D. in the straight shot prominently. They could be the house band.
Starting point is 00:44:31 They could write the theme song for the show. Yeah. Could we get them as the house band? I love that idea. J.D. in the straight shot? We want people to watch the show. I can't imagine they're busy doing anything else. First of all, it's always fun when a white person sings blue songs like that like you got bad luck and it's like no this is not you're
Starting point is 00:44:51 the fuck uh hold on i gotta do i gotta pay pay tribute to our friends at stamps.com which post office do you guys use i I can't even find stamps out here Glendale the answer should have been I don't use a post office using a post office is terrible it's a terrible place to be you have to wait in line
Starting point is 00:45:16 you have to be around all these people you don't want to be in the same line with little kids running around can't find stuff somebody's at the line for 10 minutes arguing about whatever like why go? I don't understand why. Somebody's at the line for 10 minutes arguing about whatever. Like, why go? I don't understand.
Starting point is 00:45:27 Why would you go to the post office? Every time I go, it's awful. You got to find a parking space. The post offices always have like seven, eight parking spaces for 17 cars. You got to stand there. Somebody might hit your fender. I mean, you might get in a car accident in the post office parking lot. Well, just go to
Starting point is 00:45:46 stamps.com at stamps.com you can buy and print official u.s postage for any letter or package using your own computer or printer sign up for stamps.com right now use the promo code bs you get a four-week trial a 110 bonus offer that includes postage and a digital scale. Digital scale you can use for more than postage. You know, you just weigh things. Weigh anything. Weigh food. Weigh granola. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:46:13 The post office situation is lousy. Stamps.com, not lousy. Go to Stamps.com. Click on the microphone at the top of the homepage. Type in BS. That's Stamps.com. Enter BS. All right. It's Brendan time. Come sit of the homepage. Type in BS. That's stamps.com. Enter BS. Alright, it's Brendan time. Come sit in the middle.
Starting point is 00:46:30 This is Brendan. No, sit in the middle. Joel, you stay. Yeah. Pull that mic over a little bit. You guys have to share a mic like your Springsteen and whoever in the We Are The World video. Who did Springsteen share the mic with?
Starting point is 00:46:45 Cindy Lauper? I don't remember. You got to move up a little bit. Oh, okay. Okay. On that, this really is like We Are The World. So, Brendan Lynch, one of our writers, stand-up comic. Yes.
Starting point is 00:46:58 Sports fan. Sports fan and podcast coach. I was coaching Pat and Joel yesterday about their hot takes. Oh, what to do? Okay. Giving them notes. Hot take coach. And I was like a proud father sitting there.
Starting point is 00:47:11 Right. It was beautiful, guys. Thank you. Brandon, when we do, we have a bunch of ideas meetings. And there's always one nugget from Brandon's life that skips out. Like, for instance, a couple weeks ago, you just casually in the middle of conversation confessed to going to the eight-hour OJ movie in Santa Monica
Starting point is 00:47:32 and how you brought a friend, but you didn't tell him the movie was eight hours. You're like, you want to meet at this movie at 1.30? You didn't tell him it was eight hours long. Yeah, he was mad um but everyone said no because it's a big ask because i i assume my wife was gonna go but she she's so sick of oj stuff like i took her on an oj tour right of brentwood i've you know we've watched every single oj we watched courtroom footage together yeah Yeah. And she just said no more.
Starting point is 00:48:05 Can you tell us more about the OJ tour in Brentwood? Oh, okay. So the OJ tour in Brentwood, there's a guy. His name is Adam. And he's a stand-up comedian. He offers this OJ tour. The original OJ tour was done by a screenwriter who wrote the cartoon Land Before Time. And then OJ killed him Before Time. And then O.J. killed him?
Starting point is 00:48:25 No. He started doing it during the time of the trial and then when all these new shows came out this kid Adam, he got permission to do it and I read about it and immediately bought a ticket and
Starting point is 00:48:41 you start out at the... First of all, he picks you up in a white bronco that's i i mean i feel like he should what are you doing this weekend that's fine i'm doing this the tour is on a sunday night like the same night we we meet at well you meet at the him at the school okay where there was the play that, um, what? Yeah. Okay. And, then he takes you up through, um,
Starting point is 00:49:10 uh, the Gretna green apartment. Okay. Fascinating. Yeah. You know, um, to find out,
Starting point is 00:49:17 you know, where that was in relation to OJ's house. Then you go over to the, the, um, uh, the restaurant, which is now a Pete's coffee.
Starting point is 00:49:25 Right. Uh, I've been to that Pete's coffee. I didn't ever knew which is now a Pete's Coffee. Right. I've been to that Pete's Coffee. I never knew it was a historic Pete's Coffee. It used to be Mezzaluna, where she left the eyeglasses. A tiny little, I don't want to step on this guy's tour, but. No, please step on it. Tiny little note. There were, I believe, two other waiters who were murdered who worked at that restaurant.
Starting point is 00:49:47 At the Mezzaluna? Yeah. Really? Two other. Yeah. Two more. Two more. Tate agrees.
Starting point is 00:49:52 All right. Yeah. Tate was at the eight hour. Yeah. Okay. I'm not surprised. Google the name. Michael Nigg is his name.
Starting point is 00:50:03 And there's a YouTube page. I mean, sorry, a Wikipedia page dedicated to this. But wait, on this OJ tour, how do you see the house? Because they knocked it down and they don't even have the address anymore. So you just drive by where the house used to be? Yeah, you just drive by OJ's house. Yeah, just, you know, where it used to be. And then you go to the Rockingham Estate?
Starting point is 00:50:26 Yeah. Do you go to the McDonald's that he went to with kato where he was always rumored to have no done god knows what at the mcdonald's that got him fired up i went to that on my own okay okay yeah that was a mcdonald's is still there um yeah it's been totally refurbished it's now like one of the really new style mcdonald's do you believe that story that him and kato might have done some done some uh substances that got oj a little fired up um so one of my favorite rumors of that whole thing who knows if it's true i i do think it's interesting that in the that oj and kato i always thought that they were close but they weren't close yeah he was like that house house boy living in the, that OJ and Kato, I always thought that they were close,
Starting point is 00:51:06 but they weren't close. Yeah. He was like that house, house boy living in the back. Yeah. Um, all right. So wait, um,
Starting point is 00:51:14 your internet deep dives, your last three. Do you remember what they were? Um, yeah. Um, I looked on my phone and, uh,
Starting point is 00:51:23 I'm getting really into, uh, chiropractic adjustment videos on YouTube. I have a specific guy that I want the listeners to search out. His name is Nelson Vitanzi. He works out of Colorado. This guy is a machine. Okay. This guy is. And my wife won't let me go to a chiropractor. It's one of my dreams, but her dad's a doctor, so she's totally against it. She said she would leave me if I went to a chiropractor. But this guy, Nelson, V-E-T-A-n-z-e yeah his videos are fascinating he has jake he adjusts jake plumber the snake jake plumber retired early yeah well
Starting point is 00:52:11 um okay so that's one yeah that's what's what's your number two deep dive so the number two deep dive is sort of an like a continuation of that I was getting really into chiropractic adjustment videos. They relax me. I like to just sit there, maybe a little cocktail, watch someone get adjusted. I don't know what it is. Then all of a sudden I click on this video, chiropractic stroke.
Starting point is 00:52:41 What is this? I click on it. It's Kevin Sorbo. That's the worst porn search ever. Kevin Sorbo, Hercules, look this up. He spoke at this medical conference about
Starting point is 00:52:54 how his chiropractor adjusted his neck and he was driving on Wilshire Boulevard. Kevin Sorbo is the most amazing storyteller of all time. And it's just him having a stroke
Starting point is 00:53:09 in his expensive car going from, and I have no, listen, chiropractors, I have no ill will. It's just Kevin Sorbo is not into it. He's totally against neck adjustments specifically um but please look that video up because kevin sorbo who knew kevin sorbo was america's greatest storyteller oh it's like because he he talks so he's like is he like a modern day mark tween like how would you describe him yes okay that's what he because he's's talking about the veins in the neck, right?
Starting point is 00:53:46 And then he describes Wilshire as the vein of Los Angeles. Oh, yeah. It's just beautiful. I don't know. But maybe he had too much muscle to be adjusted. Might have been part of the problem. Yeah. I think for people like us, it would have been fine.
Starting point is 00:53:58 All right. What's your third deep dive? Oof. I got a couple. I'm going to pick one. I'm going to go with... Let's go with Eyes Wide Shut. This is a movie I saw when I was younger.
Starting point is 00:54:14 I hated it. This is the worst piece of garbage I've ever seen in my life. I can't believe Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman spent three years with this maniac in england making this thing then on youtube looking around come across these people who analyze the movie i may or may not have seen one of these and it now it's my favorite movie i can't stop watching eyes wide shut my wife is like stop watching that movie. And it is, it's,
Starting point is 00:54:47 it like, I'm convinced like Stanley Kubrick. I mean, the guy was just, he's on another level. Cause people did this with The Shining too. Somebody made a whole documentary about all the things they, did you see that one?
Starting point is 00:54:58 Yeah. In 237? Totally. Yeah. I saw that. That's a, that's like, yeah.
Starting point is 00:55:10 So you think the Eyes wide shut, deep dive, seeing things beyond the movie is even better than it was for The Shining? Yeah, the theories are... Give us like two theories. Two theories are... Well, Red Mask, the character, if you've seen it there's a sex party and there's this Red Mask guy and when I was watching as a kid I was like
Starting point is 00:55:34 wait you're talking about Eyes Wide Shut not the show party we had yeah sorry and there's a theory just about there's all these theories on who red mask is it's just a lot about how like stanley kubrick was is telling us that you know the illuminati exists yeah and i and and i'm i have no opinion on it i'm just fascinated there's all these symbol uh masks
Starting point is 00:56:02 stuffed tigers these are things to look out for people yeah stuffed tigers always you always heard that um isn't the number 33 an illuminati number because i love that number because larry bird and i've gotten weird emails from illuminati people like hey dude i i get the 33 thing man you're one of us of us. I'm like, no, I'm not. I just like Larry Bird. I'm not in the Illuminati. Yeah, the 33, you can look up, there's all these people online, like Walt Disney's, his club at Disneyland. 33 Club.
Starting point is 00:56:34 33 Club. And I want to let it be known, because sometimes I pitch these out-of-the-box stuff, and I don't preface it with, I'm fascinated by the Illuminati. I don't preface it with like i'm fascinated by the illumina i don't believe in conspiracy theory i am more fascinated that i just love passion if you're into something i want to be around you yeah so like you know that's why you love pat pat loves sugar-free red bull yeah sugar-free red sugar-free red bull and all the ph sports teams except the Eagles. And Stamps.com. And Stamps.com.
Starting point is 00:57:22 But, yeah, I just love – so that's what's great about the internet is that you just find these people who are just, you know, while most people are out worrying about a job, they're watching eyes wide shut frame by frame just trying to pick up the nuances. And I want to be a part of it. Well, this is why we've picked the writers on our staff very carefully. And we love passion more than anything. We have a bunch of passionate people. If you learn anything today, Bill, you have to have the Lopez twins and chiropractic Kevin Sorbo on the pod. Talking about eyes wide shut. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:57:41 Brendan, I think we're going to create a podcast for Channel 33. Illuminati number. Channel 33. Didn't realize it. But I think we're going to have a podcast that we're going to create called The Writer's Room. Because we have not just you three, but Kathy and we have Trayvon, who's been on this podcast. And I think we just need a place for these things to be discussed. Because it seems like your deep dives change every week too.
Starting point is 00:58:07 Oh yeah. I mean, it's, it's, it's, it's based on mood. It's based on how much often do you sleep? Um,
Starting point is 00:58:12 not often. Last night I went to bed at three. My wife is in Maryland with her parents, so I've just been, my clocks. Before we go, can you tell the story about when your wife's purse got stolen? Oh my God.
Starting point is 00:58:24 Okay. Yeah. So, um, we were doing lawn. I was doing laundry. Uh, my wife is a dentist, so I was washing her scrubs. Um, and she, and so I said, Hey, do you want to walk around the block? Well, uh, you know, it's, it's in the dryer. She says, sure. So we, we walk around our block, our block, which is an, an, just a normal area of LA called palms. We're walking around our block our block which is a just a normal area of la called palms we're walking around the block and this guy on a skateboard runs up behind and i just move out of the way because i know most skateboarders are just have nothing to lose right uh like why even create a problem so i just move up and the guy grabs on like tat like doesn't tackle my wife but just
Starting point is 00:59:06 bear hugs her and starts and and i have never been in a fight in my life right yeah um so i say i start pulling them off of her and she's screaming right and then i go and i can't think of anything to say to the guy i'm face to face with him, fist balled. And this is what comes out of my mouth. Do you want to bang bro? Because there's a, I'm a big ultimate fighter fan. And there's, there's a guy on the ultimate fighter who, who just look up. Let me bang bro.
Starting point is 00:59:43 Yeah. Cause there's this guy who got drunk in the Ultimate Fighter. That's why Google Let Me Bang Bro. No, no, no. YouTube it. YouTube Let Me Bang Bro
Starting point is 00:59:50 because there's this guy, I forget what his name was, but he had a mohawk, but he got drunk in the Ultimate Fighter house and he just wanted to bang. He just wanted to fight. So I said,
Starting point is 00:59:57 do you want to bang bro? Then these neighbors came out, they surrounded him, tackled him. We called the LAPD. They came like two hours later. My wife would not talk to me she the only thing she said to me she looked me in the eye and she said do you want to bang bro what was that and the other guy and then the cop nothing really
Starting point is 01:00:18 happened the cop said you should have punched him and uh i didn't and my wife accused me of not wanting to break my hand because it would affect my right which is totally not true like i would have punched her what was that weird movie that where there was the avalanche and instead of saving his family the dad ran out of the way snow dogs no no uh no there was a movie this is the whole point of a movie and i can't remember the name of it it was like norwegian or something but uh the dad instead of protecting like they're sitting have at a ski slope having lunch and this avalanche is coming and the dad runs instead of you know trying to figure out what for yeah force majeure i gotta look that up and the wife oh my god this would mess with you for like a week and the wife is so upset that he didn't protect
Starting point is 01:01:19 the family instead of just protecting himself that they that then the movie ensues after that i mean i would recommend that might be a deep dive for you i'm a team player and let me just say that the reason the guy grabbed onto her um the cop said is that he smoked uh synthetic marijuana which i you know so just uh stay away from that stay away from that yeah well i think we're gonna launch uh the writer's room next week on channel 33 because we need more of this. Thanks again to today's sponsor, Casper Mattresses. Obsessively engineered American-made mattresses at a shockingly
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Starting point is 01:02:08 Sign up for stamps.com right now. Use the promo code BS for a four-week trial plus a $110 bonus offers that includes postage and a digital scale. Click on the microphone at the top of the homepage. Type in BS. Thanks again to 5-4 Club. It's a $60
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Starting point is 01:02:45 Learn more about Star Station at star.com. Please check out theringer.com. We've done some great stuff. Check out our podcast network. We have eight podcasts going. They're all awesome. And my show launches June 22nd, HBO, Wednesday night, any given Wednesday. Give your Twitter handle so people can follow you on Twitter.
Starting point is 01:03:03 Joel? It's Joel W Solomon S-O-L-O-M-O-N Brendanzig B-R-E-N-D-A-N-Z-I-G Pat Barker Comedy yeah
Starting point is 01:03:17 follow those guys it's fun having you in my life this has been good we got our show launching soon and we have a good time here in the office
Starting point is 01:03:24 so thank you for being on the podcast thanks for having us and bent the wires thing you in my life. This has been good. We got our show launching soon and we have a good time here in the office. So thank you for being on the podcast. Thanks for having us. And bet the Warriors think. Enjoy the weekend. Anytime y'all want to see me again, rewind this track right here. Close your eyes and picture me rolling.

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