The Bill Simmons Podcast - Ep. 128: Week 4 NFL Lines With Cousin Sal
Episode Date: September 29, 2016HBO and The Ringer's Bill Simmons brings on Cousin Sal to guess the lines for Week 4. Topics include: Carson Wentz's big week (5:00), Vin Scully's farewell (8:30), the struggling Bengals (17:00), Matt...hew Stafford's garbage-time magnificence (24:00), Tom Brady's vacation (28:00), the top-tier teams (36:00), Mike Mularkey's coaching record (41:41), Chargers-Saints (49:30), the stout Minnesota defense (56:00), and Ryder Cup best bets (1:01:00). Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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Don't forget about any given Wednesday.
That's my HBO show.
We had Abby Wambach and Charlamagne this week.
It was a good one.
Watch the re-airs on HBO, HBO Go, or HBO On Demand,
another new show coming next Wednesday.
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Don't tell anyone.
For great reads in sports, pop culture, tech, and politics,
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And I hope you subscribe to our new podcast, Ringer University,
which covers college football and college hoops.
Chris Vernon makes his debut this Friday.
Cousin Sal is going to make his re-debut right now.
Let's go.
Yeah.
Clear enough for you.
All right.
All right.
We're taping this on a Wednesday at 5 o'clock p.m. L.A. time.
So if there's any more massive injuries like J.J. Watt just getting knocked out for the entire season,
don't blame us.
Unbelievable.
What is a terrible five days for the Texans? They played your juggernaut team without a quarterback.
They sure did. Proved that they can't
compete long
run with the AFC's best.
And then just a few days later,
now it seems that they can't even
win their miserable division. I don't even know
what's going to happen there. Or can
they? Here's my question.
Is eight wins
enough to win the AFC South?
It might be, right?
By three, it might be enough.
I don't like any of these other teams.
It would be easy to discount the Titans.
But I don't know.
They're in not a bad spot.
And they lost 17-10 last week to a Raiders team that might be good.
We don't know.
Week before, they came back.
They beat Detroit.
The week before that, who did they came back they beat detroit the week before
that they play the vikings they had the lead there yeah they're in the they might be a sleeper
as we're talking i'm gonna have to look at the titans and then they play the texans this week so
because you figure i i know this point's been made i'm not claiming that i originated it
i don't see how and Andrew Luck gets through the season.
I wish no harm on the man, but the amount of hits that he takes,
and it's like he's one of those quarterbacks that every hit you just kind of feel on your couch.
Some guys, they take the hits, and it's like they roll with them the right way,
and then there's other guys like your guy Romo.
Sorry.
It's all right.
But Luck, I don't see him lasting with that offensive line.
You know, they should invent a couch that provides the shock that you'll feel your quarterback getting hit.
Wouldn't that be cool?
Wouldn't you be like, we do this fantasy football nonsense anyway because we want to feel like we own a team or run a team.
Right.
How about if we felt like we were in the game?
They had...
Sack couch.
Don't the movie seats have that, right?
They do, right.
Didn't they make movie theaters where the seat would shake as you're watching Fast and Furious?
Yeah, and they have the simulators with the Simpsons if you're in Disneyland or something.
That's a great deal.
If I said eight wins will win the AFC South, would you go over or under on that?
Or would you nod at me and say that's a pretty good one?
I like that one.
I think two teams will be 7-8 going into the last week.
Yeah, I think that sounds about right.
Seems right, right?
Yeah, I don't think anyone's going to have 10.
I really want to cross Jacksonville off,
and I just don't see how we can do it.
Are you ready to be on any given Wentz day?
Oh, boy.
Oh, boy.
Oh, yeah.
See what I did there?
We're taping.
You love him, huh?
He's pretty good.
What did you think?
Yeah, I think he's pretty good.
Some of these other guys I need to see more of.
I don't think I need to see a lot more out of him.
I mean, you know, there's still the thing that we discussed last week where you want your team down 10-0 and see how they respond.
But he seems to have all the tools, everything.
I do think with quarterbacks, certain things you just kind of know right away.
Like I think baseball pitchers are like that.
I think women are like that.
Just say beautiful woman, like she's beautiful.
Wentz just seems like a good quarterback.
He is.
Just the way he carries himself
the way he moves, he's got a bazooka
seems really smart
it's really hard for me to imagine
a scenario where this is a fluke
I know
somebody's going to solve this and he's going to fall apart
I just don't see it
do you think the NFC East is the most improved
or most surprising division
or not so much
I think you need to settle down.
Who?
Me?
I don't think the Giants, you know,
they barely beat that crappy Saints team that just got annihilated on Monday night.
I don't buy the Native Americans.
I'm not positive I buy Philly.
Everyone will be around.
Everyone will be around, don't you think?
I think you're in good shape.
You mean the Cowboys? Yeah, I think you're in good shape. You mean the Cowboys?
Yeah, I think you're in pretty good shape.
So the AFC South, Texans minus 110, Colts plus 160, Titans plus 800.
And they already played the Vikings.
So here's Titans' rest of the schedule.
Can't believe we're doing this already.
At Houston.
Uh-huh.
At Miami.
Cleveland, Indianapolis, Jacksonville.
Back to back to back.
Wow.
Jacksonville Thursday night.
At San Diego.
Home for Green Bay.
At Indianapolis.
At Chicago.
Mm-hmm.
Bye week.
At KC.
At Jacksonville and at Houston.
That can't be right. I must have written one of those down wrong. KC, at Jacksonville, and at Houston. That can't be right.
I must have written one of those down wrong.
KC's probably home, but not a lot of tough games on that schedule.
Easier conversation if they go to Houston and win this week.
I say we put down 8-1 on them.
If Houston beats them, they have a two-game lead, right?
Right.
8-1, though.
8-1 is nice for that because I really do think 7-9, 8-1 is a nice one.
All right, I'm going to write that down, because I'm going to tell you something, Bill Simmons.
We need a winner.
We do need a winner.
Joe House and I, we were going to hold an intervention for you, because you've led us into a 12-car
pileup the last two, three weeks.
No, just last week.
Just last week with the Steelers.
We won week two.
No, we had some clunkers in there. No, we won week two.
Week two was the winner.
Oh, we won week two.
Week one we lost.
I put the Steelers with a couple of our parlays this week,
and they lost by 30 points.
Yeah.
All right, we'll delay the intervention until I'm sure next week.
So the Eagles are now the favorites in the NFC East.
Plus 180.
Giants plus 200.
Cowboys plus 250.
Redskins plus 800.
Wow.
The division winners.
Pats are minus 600.
Let's congratulate.
So before we get to week four, we have this Pats AFC East Hillary Clinton bet
that is now looking pretty good.
Yeah.
After Thursday and then after Tuesday.
What was the debate? Monday? Yeah. After Thursday. I feel pretty good about that. And then after Tuesday. What was the debate?
Monday?
Yeah.
What is she, minus 200 now?
She's pretty solid.
220 in some spots, yeah.
Hard to imagine him bouncing back.
It turns out you need to know facts and to tell the truth.
There are debates.
He's pulling out the big guns, though.
That's the only thing.
If he makes her cry, I guess he loses, too.
But if he makes her scream at him and swing her purse at him, maybe he can climb back into this.
She was a rock.
I was really impressed by it.
She just looked at him with that kind of half smile on her face the whole time.
Never cracked.
There's a lot of eye rolling.
You know she wanted to say something.
I have a really important topic to bring up. i have one more important topic to bring up how much of the country
actually cares about vince gully oh yeah no no wow not downy vince gully he's an amazing announcer
but if you're in kansas city do you care no if you're in houston do you care houston yes
no you have to care about something when i was in boston i never thought about vince scully ever
other than he did a couple of the nbc games right so is is this la people are driving this vince
scully thing or what's going on here i think he's been so you got your who's who's the celtics now you
have the ernie most you have johnny most you have ernie harwell for detroit chick hern i get it i
feel like he's put 15 he's plus 15 years on these guys though isn't he yeah that's it that's that's
pretty and the fact that he worked alone was good but yeah do people care i don't think they care
but i also don't think i can i mean, the LA thing, it's a...
Sure.
I can't understate how big of a story it is here.
Very, very big.
I just wonder if anyone else cares because it's being covered like it's this gigantic
national story.
Right.
In Boston, they don't care.
No, they don't.
In New York, they claim to maybe care, but I don't think they do.
Well, he did Brooklyn for a little bit, but yeah.
Why are you nervous? Why can't we talk about this? I don't care. do. Well, he did Brooklyn for a little bit, but yeah. Why are you nervous?
Why can't we talk about this?
I don't care.
No, we're talking about it.
He looks nervous.
It does feel a little sacrilegious, but I do think people need to appreciate more than
the way he could spin a tail and everything else that he did this alone.
Nobody goes in the booth alone when they're 80 years old or 60 or 50 years old.
It's pretty great.
I never really appreciated him in any way until I lived here.
And sometimes I would put Dodger games on just cause it was just relaxing.
It was nice to have him in the background just doing Vince Gulley things.
And just listen there.
And I also think like to do anything at age 89.
Phenomenal.
I mean, think about how old our dads are.
Our dads are, behave like 89-year-olds, but they're not 89.
He never screwed up.
And even you, here it is 5 o'clock on a Wednesday.
You're ordering coffee.
Your assistant just dropped off coffee.
I just had a coffee.
What do you need coffee for?
I needed a little rush for the lines.
To start the day at 5 p.m., you need a coffee.
So you don't think this Vince Goully thing was out of whack at all?
No, I didn't even think of it in terms of the rest of the country.
But I think it blew up in L.A. and deservedly so.
Yes.
This is like the most safe I've ever seen you play anything.
Really?
What do you want me to say about Vince Scully?
I've never seen you tiptoe.
I'm mad at freaking Time Warner who didn't let us listen to him for the last two years.
That sucks.
Yeah, everyone's like, oh my God, Vince Scully, we're going to miss him.
It's like, you know who else missed him?
Yeah, everybody.
Everyone with DirecTV.
Those assholes that couldn't give us the last weekend of Vince Scully.
Go back to your feuding on Monday.
I said goodbye to him three years ago when he wasn't on DirecTV.
I have friends who are stealing cable.
Remember when you used to steal cable?
Yeah.
I have buddies doing that just for Vince Scully.
I think you know who they are.
I so desperately wanted somebody to try to do a Vin Scully swimming against the stream take
than just get annihilated by the internet.
He wasn't that good.
It would be funny to set up one of your Ringer writers to do that.
It's almost like a suicide mission.
It would have been a great April Fool's prank.
Vin Scully should have left 15 years ago.
No, it is going to be, you know, it's always weird when these iconic announcers leave.
Like when Johnny Most left the Celtics, it was just completely discombobulating for like five years.
It just didn't make sense.
Yeah.
I didn't like hearing anybody else.
Yeah. Remy's not going to be as big. I didn't like hearing anybody else. Yeah.
Remy's not going to be as big.
I'm going to miss Vince Goey.
You know what I think Vince Goey's
in Dirty Moment's going to be, though?
What?
For Love of the Game.
You think so?
Yeah.
Because the Gibson Homer, whatever,
everybody's seen that, the Buckner era.
But like, For Love of the Game
is just on cable all the time.
And he's amazing in that.
He is good in it.
He's really good in it.
And most times when announcers are in a movie or a TV show,
they're awful.
And they seem super scripted.
He's solid.
I think Vince Scully might have thought that game actually happened.
That's what they had to tell him.
Yeah, it's like Costner's pitching a no-hitter.
It's really happening right now.
I'll do you one better.
I think you say Boston fans don't care.
I think they're angry at the Vince Scully thing.
When you equate a certain, you know, he called the Buckner error.
And, you know, that's Vince Scully behind the bag.
I mean, that's the real thing with Vince Scully.
Well, that's why I never was really able to let my guard down with him.
Because he was the voice of the worst sportswoman of my life.
Yeah, exactly.
And it's tough to.
It's like the last few years
I equated, you know,
Collinsworth and Michaels.
I couldn't take it
because the Cowboys
couldn't win on Sunday night.
And thank you, Collinsworth,
for basically
Tony Romo's obituary.
Like, enough already.
Let's, please.
Al Michaels,
try to reel him in a little.
And I know you love Collinsworth
and I do too for the most part.
But you sold the game.
People were watching the game.
People were watching the game.
We get it.
Dak Prescott's good.
I'm really the only Cowboys fan that's so torn I can't root fully for Dak Prescott.
I hate it.
It seems like the Cowboy fans have just moved on.
Yeah.
For almost like, guys, it's too risky.
You see.
You'll be like, oh, Tony, all right, well, we'll see you later.
Can we drive you to the airport?
I'll tell you what, Simmons.
I'm going to take the bait here.
I don't care.
You can get me.
But Romo is 2-1 or 3-0 with this team.
What are people thinking?
He doesn't beat the Bears.
He doesn't beat the Redskins.
Did you see that Giants defense that Prescott couldn't beat?
He could be 3-0.
Let's everybody relax a little here.
I totally agree.
Just relax. I know you have your coffee, everybody relax a little here. I totally agree. Just relax.
I know you have your coffee, but relax.
It doesn't make any sense.
Who are you going to miss more,
Vin Scully or Leo DiCaprio at the end of Blood Diamond?
I didn't cry when Scully left.
Yeah, maybe, maybe, you know.
He did sing that one, Beneath My Wings,
which is selling on iTunes right itunes right now he sure did uh last question before we get to the last michael irvin had an incident on social media that i mailed you where he took a selfie stick
and then made a sexual joke with the news anchor right and it got me thinking that
there's just not enough of michael urban with social media
i feel like we we haven't even really tipped the potential of it yet right i need more we need him
snapchatting we need him instagramming right need him around people in the office i just want more
he's entering anthony wiener territory like last week was the lombardi trophy and changing to
belichick all right that's fun and now it's like taking pictures with hot reporters and being inappropriate.
Let's do the lines.
Let's do it.
And let me tell you something.
I'm playing this week on the protest because you didn't send me your lines this week.
Just didn't send them.
Oh, well, I never.
You just didn't send them.
I never saw them either.
All right.
Now I have to trust that you didn't just look at these two minutes ago.
I send you mine Monday morning.
And look at this, a blank column for Bill.
So I'm going to have to figure these out on the fly.
Hey, quickly, let's talk about NFLSundayTicket.tv.
Oh.
If you're a diehard NFL fan who can't get DirecTV where you live, we have good news.
You can still watch football games on Sunday, even without a satellite.
Stream games using your favorite device.
And if you're a college student, there might be an exclusive deal for you.
Right now, our listeners get 10% off when using the promo code RINGER.
Go to NFLSundayTicket.tv.
Use promo code R-I-N-G-E-R today.
I just want to say, I was trapped at my daughter had two soccer games. Go to NFLSundayTicket.tv. Use promo code R-I-N-G-E-R today.
I just want to say, I was trapped at, my daughter had two soccer games on Sunday.
And for the first time, I was able to watch the football games. Nice.
As I was trapped in Norco from 8 o'clock till 2.30.
So the second game started at 12.30 and I knew they were going to
win both games so I wasn't that stressed out.
But I kind of had it
and I think she knew what I was up
to so she's playing and kind of looking over
and was doing that whole thing.
So thanks DirecTV for that. You caused a dissension
with me and my daughter. I love you don't get any credit
for driving her four and a half hours.
Or baking in 100 degree heat.
And then she somehow got mad at me on the way home because Any credit for driving her four and a half hours. No, or baking in 100 degree heat. Right, yeah.
And then she somehow got mad at me on the way home because I don't even know what to say anymore. The father-daughter relationship.
You both missed out and you didn't miss out.
I know.
It's just a rollercoaster ride.
I'm so happy for you.
I can't even describe it.
But yeah, so I had the Red Zone channel on and then they have all these little buttons, and you could go to different games, and it was really great.
That's great.
Yeah.
I'm glad 2016, we've come a long way from the DirecTV suitcase.
All right, back to the podcast.
Under protest, you never sent me yours, but let's do this.
You know how insanely honest I am about this stuff.
I got you.
I also know that you've lost-
I have not seen any lines.
You've lost the first three weeks, and you'll get any edge you can.
Let's see how this works out. I've not seen the lines, but you know what I've been doing well on is the Don Julio shot of the week.
Oh, you are.
You're 2-1.
I'm 1-2, picking the Thursday game for Don Julio.
Every Thursday, we take a shot of the week presented by Don Julio and Dan Sanborn and his four kids.
Right.
I nailed the Jets in week two and the Pats last week.
I do feel like Don Julio should be sending me tequila-flavored chocolates
if I keep winning.
He's probably not even...
Does he even know we're doing this?
Does he care? Does he care about us?
He cares a little more than Vince
Scully retiring, but not too much.
It's not on his radar so much.
Miami at Cincinnati is the Thursday
game. What a terrible game.
Oh, I did guess the lines.
I have them here.
I did on Monday.
Oh, you did?
Yeah, I'll just read what I had.
How convenient.
All right.
I had the Bengals seven and a half.
Bengals are seven and a half.
Why would I cheat?
I said Bengals by seven.
And so you get it.
I have to do it. It's become a cliche of a cliche of a cliche at this point
what are you doing which one are we sure the bengals are good no we're not i was so mad at
them last week they might not be good i had them over denver it made sense the days by the way the
days of the bad or the new quarterbacks going on the road the gamblers always had some kind of
advantage with bad or new quarterbacks going on the road and losing you could bet against a trevor simeon
you could bet against a uh uh who's the rams credit quarterback case case keenum it doesn't
happen anymore i have i don't know if this is accurate the home teams were six to nine last
week yeah 21 and 25 overall against the spread.
That can't be right.
Maybe it's 21-27.
Well, there were 16 games, but yeah.
Yeah, 21-27, something.
They're definitely under 500.
Both teams played so poorly.
I don't even know why I look at the home teams anymore.
How many home teams actually affect your thought process at this point?
It shouldn't matter, right?
I guess, like, last week, idiotic going against Seattle and Seattle.
Like, I should know. Well, we had Green against Seattle and Seattle. I should know.
Well, we had Green Bay and Seattle.
Both offenses were struggling.
So you figured, I don't know, was that going to be the week?
And it did.
It was the week that they both woke up.
But one of these teams usually—
Pats and home have been pretty good.
That was nice.
Baltimore and home.
It's only like five teams.
Other than that, throw it out.
But it's not December.
You can go to Baltimore and win if you're a regular team.
Which one is more likely to go 6-10, Cincinnati or Arizona?
Oh, man, 6-10.
Well, because one of those teams is going to go 6-10.
I think Cincinnati maybe because the Ravens are good
and the Steelers I think will step it up too.
Palmer has – I feel good about that prediction from a few weeks ago.
That was smart.
Palmer definitely does not look right, and I think there's been some residue damage.
They can't throw the deep ball anymore.
No.
I mean, you called it.
Congratulations, Cousin Sal.
Sure thing on Facebook.
You did the—
That was my best bet.
Buffalo.
Buffalo.
I just thought they had a game where they'd break out.
I'm still not in love with the Lions. It was a kitchen sink game for bet. Buffalo. Buffalo. I thought they had a game where they'd break out. I'm still not in love with the Lions.
It was a kitchen sink game for them.
As soon as I watched it on Friday, you made that pick.
I loved it.
I changed my pick in ZFL to the Bulls.
I was like, that's great.
Everyone's written them off.
It's freaking week three.
Can't write anyone off.
Everyone's got one kitchen sink in them in the first four weeks.
Last year, here's what you should take into account for the three games.
Last year, the Super Bowl teams, both Denver and Carolina,
were both 0-3 at this point.
Now, that's not true.
No, that's not true.
No, but all right.
But what is true, Atlanta was 3-0.
They were nowhere close to the playoffs.
Houston, KC, Seattle, and Washington were 1-2,
and they all made the playoffs.
So it's still early still
early I think the uh the Philly could be the team we talk about like that I don't the thing I don't
understand with Philly and I have so many Philly fans in my life now that I feel like half my
conversations are with Philly not Boston but they they were throwing away this year yeah like they
had they they basically like were using this year year to erase all of their salary cap sins
to try to get the ship right for next year.
And it's just hard for me to believe that Carson Wentz and Jim Schwartz
would turn this into a 12-4 team.
It doesn't seem logical.
Too many holes.
Maybe it won't happen.
Maybe we're going overboard on that team, specifically.
And who knew Jim Schwartz was the second coming of God as a defensive coordinator?
I just remember him as a lousy NFL coach.
Right, right.
Because that didn't translate.
No, that was a good hire.
Sunday.
All right, well, hold on.
Don't we have to pick the game?
Don Julio?
Oh, we have to take our Don Julio shot of the week.
Let's do it.
I like the Dolphins.
I don't think the Bengals should be 7.5 over anybody.
Okay. I'm taking the Dolphins, too.'t think the Bengals should be 7.5 over anybody. Okay.
I'm taking the Dolphins, too.
I think in these Thursday night games, they're weird.
And Don Julio himself is a wise man, and he knew in these fixed games,
always take the points, especially if it's a touchdown.
Something's not right with that Bengals team.
I mean, until Eifert gets back, that offense is way out of sync.
Does Perfect Strangers premiere this week or no?
I think so, yeah.
It does?
The gas station monitor.
Congratulations on that.
All right, Sunday, Green Bay and Philly are off.
Well-deserved bye week for both teams.
Green Bay had to play Jacksonville and the Lions.
They need a break.
This is such a waste of bye in week four.
I didn't bet on the Packers.
It's too worldly.
I fully support your week four bye.
I didn't bet on the Packers, but I've been in the situation before
where they go up by 28 points and then somehow either push or don't cover.
It's incredible.
It's almost like Mike McCarthy does it intentionally.
That was a bad sign.
Has any team ever taken their foot off the gas more times than Green
Bay the last six years? No. It just finished
the game. Yeah. How is this
a one score game? You guys
were up 28 at home. It's a
crap team. I turned it off and God bless Matthew Stafford
because he's king.
I mean, what's above
king? That's what he is for garbage time.
Fantasy points. People
make runs at him every once in a while, like Bortles
made a run at him last year.
Tannehill, I think,
has it in him from time to time, but Stafford
year after year is the Joe Montana
of garbage time. If you're down 24 and you can
have one quarterback in the league, that's your
guy, right? He plays like
somebody who has himself on his fantasy
team. Right, exactly.
That's a pretty good quote.
Up, down.
Gronkowski's hurt.
I got to make up some points.
I like it.
All right, well, there is a game in London.
Yes, we love this.
Colts.
London game.
6.30 a.m. Pacific time.
Colts at Jaguar, technically at Jaguars, but in London.
The game starts at 6.30 a.mm and your wife's first stink eye will be at
6 31 a.m yeah like what is their football they get they get so mad when the when the football's on
let's just let me just a key this is a very big uh tip i'm gonna give guys the night before make
sure your volume is way down on the remote so that when you turn on the tv at 6.30 a.m. on the West Coast, you're not waking up the whole house.
And you can even watch for an hour and a half before the wife knows what's going on.
Yeah.
Really smart.
It's right up there with the load up your arms with gasoline before coming home from the strip club.
I'm telling you.
It'll add three years to your marriage.
The glitter, I don't know what to do about.
It's a tip from Don Julio.
Gasoline.
Oh, yeah.
Spilled some gasoline on my soap again.
Why are you always filling up on gasoline on Saturday nights?
You should get somebody to pump your own gas.
What do you have in the line out here?
That's great.
That's one of your best, cuz.
Thank you.
I have the Colts by three and a half.
Okay.
I had three and a half also.
It was two, and now it's three.
So we tie there.
I don't know what to make of this game.
I don't either.
And yet again, we've done it for London.
Here's another awful game. It's this master
plan to both introduce
England to football
while also getting them to hate it.
I don't understand it.
This is Brexit part two.
We'll never send them a Packers-Pats game ever.
Anything like that.
But what do we do?
Wasn't Miami in London last year
or the year before?
Don't teams fire their coach in London? They leave them
in London? It's a leave the coach
behind game. Yeah, it's a Queens problem.
But 170 coaches have
coached 50 plus games. Gus
Bradley is 12 and 39,
ranked 169 of 170.
Who's 170?
I don't know. I should
have wrote that back down.
Now we'll never know. I should have said that back down. That we'll never know.
I should have said 168, so you wouldn't care too much.
Wow, 12 for 39.
12 and 39.
12 and 39.
Jesus.
So they could leave him there.
Yeah, but I also don't get a feeling that they might step up this game.
I don't know.
I think the Colts are terrible.
Yeah.
And they should have lost last week.
Did you watch the end of that game?
I did. That was ridiculous. The guy, the Chargers think the Colts are terrible. Yeah. And they should have lost last week. Did you watch the end of that game? I did.
That was ridiculous.
The guy, the Chargers, the cornerback got hurt.
I think it was his replacement.
Yeah.
But I don't know.
I just, you know, in the last three minutes of a game when the other team needs to touchdown
and win, I'm pretty sure I would cover T.Y. Hilton.
Yeah.
It feels like that would be one of the things on my list.
No kidding.
I don't think either of these teams would discuss who's going to win the division.
What does Mike McCoy have to do to get fired?
Yeah, he should be 3-0 too, right?
That team loses terrible games all the time.
Every week.
Tate, who loses more last-minute games than the Chargers?
They've got to be the leader of the clubhouse, right?
Yeah, pretty much.
But it's Eagles, Burt Bell, 1936-1941.
Oh, Burt Bell. Was anyone better than Tate? That's great. They made him commissioner? us right yeah pretty much but it's eagles burt bell 1936 1941 oh oh burt bell burt bell was
anyone better than that's great they made him commissioner i thought burt bell was the
commissioner maybe yeah maybe all right buffalo at new england
i had i had i mean i did this on monday i had the pats by four i'm really sorry i forgot to
send this i get. I get this.
I said six and a half, and it's six.
I don't know who's playing quarterback.
But I got lucky because it went up from four and a half to six.
Yeah, I don't know.
Is it you?
Is it Sully?
Is it your dad?
Who's quarterback?
They said Brissette can play, but he's got a bandage on his thumb.
And they said Garoppolo doesn't have full movement in his shoulder.
I saw him throw like a 30-yard pass today on Twitter.
That's good.
Meanwhile, my real quarterback's in fucking Italy with his wife.
Isn't that nice?
Taking nude sunbathing photos.
This really worked out for him.
I went on a whole rant on my show about this this week.
I'm not going to spoil it.
You did?
Yeah.
About him going away?
I have some theories on this.
They don't let you in the though, that they don't let you
in the clubhouse.
They don't let you anywhere.
It's like when you're...
When you're suspended
in high school,
you should still be allowed
to come back
and smoke outside
with your friends, right?
Like, you can't go anywhere
near the place?
Like, what...
I don't know.
It seems like they're
causing more trouble
than they need to with that.
When are you going to put
two and two together
and realize that I have
some experience with this?
What do you mean?
I was suspended for three weeks.
Oh, you are?
Yeah.
Oh, I'm sorry.
I'm talking about school.
Yeah.
Remember when we couldn't do podcasts?
Right, right, right.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I couldn't go into the office.
It was fucking crazy.
You couldn't go into-
I couldn't exchange work emails with anybody.
Oh, that's right.
Yeah.
I'm sorry.
I forgot you were a renegade.
I literally could not talk to anybody, although I did.
I mean, I had a couple phone calls.
You can't just disappear.
You didn't go to Italy.
I had a show.
We were doing the Grand Plymouth Basketball Hour that was premiering like five days after
my suspension ended, and I couldn't plan it.
Produce it or anything.
Wow.
It was so bizarre.
Yeah. ended and i couldn't plan it produce it or anything it was it was it was so bizarre yeah but when i found out during the suspension because i had been working like crazy hours for four years
what i found out was that there was this whole other life out there not so bad yeah i was like
this is nice i'm gonna wake up today and just turn on tv right i think i'm gonna walk to get coffee
i'm gonna play golf today and i'm worried that's happening to Brady.
Oh, you think so?
I am worried.
He's never enjoyed a football season since he was like 10 years old.
Right.
Now he went to Michigan.
I don't know.
All right.
I don't want to ruin your rant on any other Wednesday.
I haven't ruined most of it already.
But yeah.
Well, so six.
Any given Wednesday.
You love it.
I am a little worried.
I don't like that my quarterback's in Italy.
It'll be fine.
Charlemagne told me it was going to be fine.
I'm telling you.
Look, Roger Goodell proved his point that Brady's replaceable.
He wins.
I hate when he wins.
Is this a teaser game?
Let's go simple here.
Let's find our teaser.
I'm not going near this game.
Really?
Yeah, I think this has all the makings of a Belichick just trying to squeeze out a win
in the ugliest way possible and just get to week five, four and oh.
All right.
Seattle at the New York Jets.
Seattle at the New York Jets.
I have Seattle by three, and I'm probably wrong,
but I couldn't favor the Jets after a six-interception game by their quarterback.
I just couldn't talk myself into it.
We're going to split this.
It's two and a half, and I said two, and you said three, so we split it.
And how unfortunate it is that six picks six and fits all rhyme for Fitzpatrick.
It's bad when your name rhymes with a negative stat.
I'm so mad that—
Six picks, fits.
Six picks, fits.
Yeah, Jacoby, when we used to do the Grantland Bad Quarterback League,
that was what he called him, Pickspatrick.
Pickspatrick, yeah.
But that was like, remember, that was the year he threw like at least 20.
Right, but to have six.
To have six for picks.
And that rhymes even with picks and fits.
Six picks.
Not good. Not good. Casey was an obvious pick last week. Well, but I think that. To have six for picks. And that rhymes even with picks and fits. Six picks. Not good.
Not good.
Casey was an obvious pick last week.
Well, but I think that was a screwed up game.
I think the Giants-Saints and the Jets-Chiefs were the two screwed up games.
It's too early maybe to tell, but I don't think either.
First of all, that Giants-Saints game should have been 47-45.
It was like 13-10 or something.
I don't know. So that was weird. And I don don't think the jets are that much worse than the chiefs they just they just got in
a bad fight i think if the pats and texans had played 10 times that's weird too yeah i don't
yeah i think that was the only scenario 27 nothing was not a fair representation of that matchup
maybe they fumbled like two kickoffs on their own 20. They ran some of the worst plays I've ever seen in my life.
And I don't know.
That game should have been close.
We should have eked it out.
I'm with you.
All right, Detroit at Chicago.
I have Detroit by three.
Yeah, we both had three, and it is three.
So it's our third tie.
Yeah.
The Bears, I talked to Mays today.
Big Bears fan.
But objective.
He's just mentally and emotionally moved on to the Cubs completely.
Really?
Not even the Bears are going to be happening.
He's going to acknowledge it.
And just mentally he's done.
He's out.
Well, the Cubs score more than the Bears.
Why not?
Yeah.
The Bears, I got to say this,
Cubs run is the best thing that could happen to the Bears.
Because normally I think the Chicago fans would be,
all right, I'm saying, let's get rid of Cutler.
And now it's like, who cares?
We got the Cubs.
It doesn't matter.
I'm going to make a prediction
because I'm not picking any of these games on Cousin Sal.
Sure thing.
Jacksonville or Chicago win this week.
Maybe both.
One of these 0-3.
It's not that big a prediction.
All right, Carolina at Atlanta.
So you think kitchen sink for both of those teams?
Yeah, I think so.
One's in London, so it's a little weird.
Who are our kitchen sink candidates this week?
Jaguars, definitely the Bears.
Well, you wouldn't even say Cleveland, right?
Because they're trying to lose.
Cleveland's like...
Arizona.
Cleveland already threw the kitchen sink and it bounced off the ceiling and hit everyone in the head.
Arizona?
Arizona?
They're 1-2.
I don't know.
They can go 1-3 in that division.
They'll be two back of the Rams.
I don't know.
Saints-Chargers is
kind of the kitchen sink bowl. For who? Both?
Yeah. I mean...
Yeah. Yeah. Probably.
Alright. Alright. Carolina-Atlanta.
Really good game.
Better now that we
saw it Monday night. So is it...
Atlanta? Is there a chance they're decent?
Yeah.
So let's figure this out.
They beat the Raiders, which that destroyed Vegas.
They lost to the Bucs.
They lost to the Bucs.
Threw us off their scent.
Right.
Beat the Raiders.
Destroyed Vegas, as you said.
Crushed the Saints.
Really did.
And without Julio Jones.
He had like 11 yards receiving or something stupid like that.
The problem for them is they go Carolina at Denver at
Seattle. They have a bad stretch
coming up. They also have at Tampa, at
Philly, at the Rams, at
Carolina, and at
home for New Orleans.
They have a pretty tough
schedule. Yeah. What do you think of
the line here?
I think of the line
as going to be Panthers by three and a half yep all right we
both had that one and it is three and a half wow you're good when you don't send me the lines
oh really really good all right i'll get you here now you're gonna get this one oakland at baltimore
panthers anything well i'm throwing away last week because of all the shit that was going on in charlotte kitchen sink game but um but throw away last week right you throw away but that's a game that they
normally you know i think 2015 even 2014 late hold on to that too much off-field stuff going on
yeah the whole city's you know oh yeah i i think it was totally explainable yeah it's true there
were protests yeah shootings kyle it's totally explainable. Yeah, it's true. There were protests outside the stadium and everything.
Yeah, shootings.
It's like everything that's going on.
People asking Cam Newton, everyone in his life, how should we handle this?
I don't know.
Such a bad situation.
Up 10-0, though.
That's the weird thing.
Okay.
All right.
Oakland at Baltimore.
Is Baltimore in your elite?
I have three top tier teams.
Who are your top tier teams?
I'm going to do that in a second.
I want to tell you what my line is.
Ravens by two and a half.
Oh, you're okay.
You get this.
I said four, and it's three.
I'm going to give you my tier after we do this ad for our friends at Squarespace.
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Top tier. Top tier.
I have Pats, Steelers, Broncos, Vikings.
I didn't
have the Steelers in there.
I want to. And if
they beat the Ravens soon, I don't know when they play, I would
put them in there. But I just have those three.
Pats, Broncos, Vikings.
You talked me out of it.
You're right.
The Steelers lost by 30 points.
They shouldn't be in Tier 1.
I just threw it away.
I thought it was a weird game.
They fell behind.
It was.
The crowd.
I think they threw it away once they won.
Yeah.
But you're right.
They should have been more into that.
That's a nice state rivalry.
Pats, Broncos, Vikings.
And then next level is a little
swollen with the steelers panthers packers seahawks giants cowboys and eagles no ravens no
three and oh ravens wow and if they win this week they're if they win this week they can move they're
in your second tier but not top tier if they win schedule it's a schedule three now yeah i don't
feel really that good about i think we're forgetting how good they were in 2014.
Last year was the anomaly.
But maybe this is the good team.
They weren't on my radar at all until Jake Lazor on my show
picked them as their sleeper.
And then I looked at their schedule and I was like, oh.
Yeah, so they beat the Bills.
They suck.
They beat the Browns.
They suck.
They beat the Jags by 2. They suck. This will be a They suck. They beat the Browns. They suck. They beat the Jags by two.
They suck.
This will be a good win.
They have backfield issues.
They're celebrating Terrence West might start this week.
Their wideouts aren't scary at all.
Although Steve Smith is actually scary, but I don't think, you know.
He's literally scary.
Yeah.
Their last four games are at Pittsburgh Monday night,
home Philly, at Pittsburgh, at Cincinnati.
That's tough.
I'm sorry, at New England, home Philly, at Pittsburgh, at Cincinnati.
That's easier.
All right.
Yeah.
They'll be trying to stop us from going 13-0.
That'll be good.
You might be trying to stop them.
Tennessee at Houston.
Here we go.
Here we go.
I'm excited for this one.
Winner takes the division.
It's over already.
Wait, Tennessee at Houston?
I wrote this down wrong.
I think so.
You wrote something down?
I don't know.
You wrote something down because I never got anything.
I wrote this down wrong.
I have Texans by seven.
All right.
I had that also.
It was six and a half.
It went down to five after the Watt news.
So he's the only defensive player worth like a point and a half.
I feel bad.
I made a joke during the Pats-Texans game about how he had a good rest during the game.
Some joke about how he didn't show up for it.
And then it turns out he's got a broken back, basically.
You can't keep that guy off the field unless he's in traction.
Yeah, because he didn't do anything in that game, which was weird.
And it wasn't like we were triple teaming him or anything.
What a mess that situation is.
All right, last early game.
We still don't have a teaser we like, right?
We even have one team.
Maybe this is it.
Cleveland at Washington.
I'm not throwing Kirk Cousins in a tease.
That ain't happening.
I have the skins by seven.
I'm probably low.
You get it.
It's seven and a half.
It went from nine to seven and a half.
I had it at nine.
But like I said,
seven and a half.
You don't... I have Terrell Pryor
on both of my fantasy teams. You do? Yeah.
I beat Damoshek by two points. What's that?
Yeah, you what?
You got a win. What? You got a big win.
Have I heard my name?
Yeah, I beat him by two points. He had Drew Brees. Let me look at a big win. Have I heard my name?
Yeah, I beat him by two points.
He had Drew Brees.
Let me look at that.
Something weird happened Monday night, right?
Yeah, Drew Brees threw some weird interceptions to help me beat him.
Right.
But in all the makings of the Drew Brees garbage time something,
and I was going to lose by one point because it's been that kind of season.
And you continue to get zeros from Gronk, although he did play, right? Well, I started him over Kyle Rudolph, and he played 14 snaps.
I kind of like my team now.
I think if Terrell Pryor can be the new Jim Thorpe, I think I'm in pretty good shape.
Well, I'm 3-0 here.
You are 3-0.
Yeah, but let's talk about your team.
No, I want to hear about your team.
No, it's 3-0.
I'm not going to jinx it.
You know what?
Nobody wants to hear about anyone's fantasy team. Russell Wilson a... No, I want to hear about your team. No, it's for you now. I'm not going to jinx it. You know what? Nobody wants to hear about anyone's fantasy team.
All right, Russell Wilson.
Russell Wilson or Eli.
I'm in trouble there.
You have Zeke Elliott and Yeldon.
Is that your second running back?
TJ Yeldon.
I'm looking at your bench.
It's really your second running back, unless Rawls comes back.
Well, I spent $29 on Thomas Rawls, who has...
It's just Thomas Rawls, parentheses, shin.
Yeah, that should be good enough. What could happen
to his shin? Would he get severed
with a machete? Yeah.
Who has a shin injury? What's that mean?
Alright, you have Baldwin. It's good to have Baldwin
and Rawls. That's a good strategy to have the best
running back and receiver. I loaded up on the
Seahawks offense. Yeah. Pryor
and, what is that, Devontae Parker?
You have to have a better receiver.
Devontae Parker's good have to have a better receiver. Devontae Parker's good.
What's going on here?
I told you I didn't do a good job this year.
This is my last year in fantasy football.
This is really the year when I quit.
Just don't care.
Next year I'm going to come in and try to get every quarterback.
I'm going to get 10 quarterbacks
and then just $1 guys.
Right.
Late afternoon games. Denver or Tampa Bay.
What was our game of the day for the earlies?
I think Carolina-Atlanta, right?
Or Seattle Jets?
I'm not ready to give Atlanta a game of the anything.
No?
Yeah.
I'm not ready at all.
Then it's Seattle Jets, I think.
Titans-Texans.
I'm most interested in Titans-Texans.
Yeah, I got to say, I want to see.
It is for the division.
It's a January game.
You might as well.
Yeah.
The one thing with the Titans that we should probably consider before we put too much on
the Titans, Mike Malarkey.
Yeah, right.
He's really way, way up there.
I don't know who the worst coach in the league is, but I know that if he's not mentioned,
it's insulting to him and to us.
Yeah.
He's up there.
He's in the top four.
He is. he's not
who was that belt tate bell what'd you say bird bell the bird bell word he was also the owner of
the team so he couldn't fire oh yeah yeah see malarkey's gonna buy the team malarkey 18 and 39
as a coach yeah it's pretty good it's actually higher than i thought he's lucky he has gus
bradley in the division he can't he can't get
fired until gus bradley gets fired it's like the younger sister can't get married until
until the older ones engaged i don't think i don't think it's easy to coach a team but i do
know when i watch football on my television the sloppy teams jump out things don't look right
just the teams that just look askew and And Tennessee always looks like the penalty at the wrong time,
the play call that they shouldn't have called.
So right now we're looking forward to,
and this might be the very next bet we win,
Malarkey to make the playoffs somehow and then to bet against him.
That'd be great.
That's what we need to root for.
I think he's going to be like an 11-point underdog.
He'll be going against...
So be it.
It'll be against like Pittsburgh or Kansas City or something.
Those will be the wild cards?
Yeah.
All right.
I'll do it.
I'll take it.
Denver or Tampa Bay?
I have the Broncos by four.
It's weird.
I can't quit Tampa Bay yet.
Yeah.
All right, you're going to get this.
I had four and a half, and it's three and a half.
All signs are that I was off on my Tampa sleeper pick.
I had them, too.
And I can't quit them yet.
I feel like they're going to grow into something.
I don't know what I see, but I just.
Yeah.
I drive myself batty with that.
At Tampa Bay, I said, who did they play last week?
The Rams.
It was the Rams.
We had the Tampa Moneyline should have been a winner.
Right.
Tampa had lost 40-7 Arizona.
The Rams had just beaten Seattle.
Doug Martin, they're all pro running back, went down to injury,
and they were favored by six.
I was like, I love Tampa.
Let's just go with it.
And then they're struggling.
They're doing so... And what was that? Not that it
mattered towards the spread. What was Jameis doing
at the end there? He had
long... After the lightning storm,
he had long passed the line of scrimmage
and he was just dancing around there.
Go for it. Well, I would say
the last five minutes of that game was
a coaching catastrophe. Yeah.
Jeff Fisher was up 11 and went for two.
Oh, man.
Which I didn't even understand it.
I thought I was online Googling trying to figure out what my brain couldn't comprehend.
We're asking our 11-year-old kids about the new math of this.
Like, what's going on?
What's wrong with being up 12 with four minutes left in a football game?
Yeah.
You need two touchdowns.
Right.
Eight to three doesn't get you to 12. up 12 with four minutes left in a football game yeah you need two touchdowns right eight three
doesn't get to 12 it's like what does he think there's gonna be a touchdown and two field goals
in four minutes i was so that was so then tampa gets the ball and they ended that game with two
timeouts they called one of the two like before the last play but he threw 40 seconds left he
gets down to like the 20 yeah and it takes 20 seconds to set up.
And then it's like, just call timeout.
What are you doing?
Right.
They left the timeout.
The whole thing was crazy.
It's bad news.
Oh, and I left out the rims.
Come out of the thunder delay.
And third down in like 15, they called a pass play and complete.
Right.
Keep that clock on.
So they gave the Bucs 40.
Oh, my God.
That was the worst.
But I will say. Unbelievable. Who's your can't bet them, can't bet against them team?
Like, you lose them at a—I think Tampa Bay is my can't bet them, can't bet against them team.
I think they've just passed the Chargers, who are also in that boat.
I won on Tampa in the first week.
You did?
Well, who's your team like that?
Like, I feel like if I go to a sports book and I place a bet,
the clerk calls Jameis Winston.
He's like, all right, Sal's betting with you.
Oh, no, he's betting against you.
Like in casino when they call up.
All right, go ahead.
Go rob the diamonds now.
I would say... San Diego still?
I would say all of them.
All of them's a good answer.
This is a really good question.
It is good because it is like seven or 18.
I would say the Cardinals.
I would have taken them last week, too, and then you switched my mind.
But it's either every way I'm on there that I lose.
Maybe the Seahawks, too.
All right, let's get to that game.
Rams at Cardinals. The
first place Rams, I wrote them off. We went
over the teams who we think are out of it
and I said the Rams and now they're in first place.
I'm still writing them off. I have the cards
by seven and a half.
I said seven and a half. Yes, it is seven
and a half. Wow, you are so good when
you don't send your lines at halftime. Oh my god.
Really, really. I hate when you think I cheat. Very
impressive. Just send the lines. How hard my God. Really, really. I hate when you think I cheat. Very impressive.
Just send the lines.
How hard is it? I just forgot.
I did it, and then I forgot to send it to you.
All right.
I'm mad.
All right.
This is a teaser game, though, right?
Yeah.
Come on.
We got one, and you don't like Washington.
I could see us putting the cards in this game,
and I could see Tavon Austin running back a punt,
and all of a sudden we're down six in the fourth quarter, and you and I are texting each other like,
what do we do?
Right.
Maybe even before the fourth quarter.
When was the last time you watched Kiss of Death with David Caruso and Nick Cage?
You know what?
I knew you were going to ask me this question.
I don't know.
Forever ago. I don't know. Forever ago.
I don't know.
There's a scene in there where...
First of all, it's a great cable movie.
But there's a scene in there when Nick Cage, they go for a ride to meet somebody to pick up something.
And he brings Caruso, who's kind of like in his new crime group.
And Caruso goes to get something.
And Nick Cage comes from the other side and shoots the guy.
And he doesn't realize Caruso's wearing a wire.
But Caruso's like, what did you do?
What did you do?
So then they play it again.
And as I was watching him say this,
I was thinking to file that away for the next time we make a terrible bet.
I was going to text you, what did you do?
Because that reminded me of all of our terrible bets. Right. And that's how I feel with the Cardinals tees. I got you, what did you do? Because that reminded me of all of our terrible bets.
Right.
And that's how I feel with the Cardinals tees.
I got you.
It feels like, what did you do?
But we have to do it.
We have to.
Nick Cage leaving Las Vegas.
We're going back.
I think Caruso is my favorite cable movie actor.
Is he?
In Proof of Life.
Do you watch Proof of Life?
No, no.
He's amazing in Proof of Life.
He is?
He's flat out incredible.
You like bad movies. I do. I love bad movies. I'm doing Carolla's podcast tomorrow. less than much proof of life he's amazing in proof of life he is like flat out incredible you like
bad movies i do you love bad for bad movies i'm doing corolla's podcast tomorrow yeah wait what
was that a was that a fraudulent connection there what do you think he does bad movies i've heard
rumors not that he oh that he's oh okay i thought he's saying he's in bad movies oh
i like the hammer all right good okay no you guys do discuss like all the uh
all the crazy i haven't done a pod with adam in like two years i don't know what kind of bad
habits he's who's left to suspend you now i just that's true we're gonna find out i just picture
sitting there across from him and just his eyes rolling in the back of his head not listening to
and not even knowing i'm there i did uh what's
supposed to be an nfl sunday wrap up on facebook live uh sunday at two o'clock and he jumped in
and he did about 20 minutes on his childhood garbage can no he didn't yes it made it entertaining
did it involve race shitting in it no well that was a little after i'm getting like
comments like holy shit corolla hijacked the sports recap here we go that's the best he's the
best um 20 minutes feels like about the number of minutes i would have guessed it's perfect
it's not like you can come in for four minutes i should have had a prop on it. New Orleans at San Diego.
Chargers by three.
All right, I said three and a half.
It's four and a half,
so I get that one.
One, five, six, seven, eight, nine.
One, two, three.
We're tied somehow.
We're tied.
This seems like a great time to talk about our friends at Sonos.
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Sal, maybe they should send the Sal family a Sonos
Yeah
I'm gonna get that for you
Send it to the Sal family
You would love it
The Sal family would love it
Play different songs in each room
I like it
Every room could have a different song going
At your parties
You have parties
You have a Halloween party this year?
Yeah
You could have Sonos
Could be playing the music
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Go to Sonos.com right now.
Right now?
Like literally right now.
We'll stop the podcast.
We still have games.
All right, the night games.
Well, Drew, no, we have one more.
But the Saints, referees checking their arm.
I think it dropped twice.
This is it.
This is it for them, right?
I think it's been it for them for
two years. So you say Saints are done?
You say the Browns are done?
Anyone else?
Sean Payton's another guy who fits
my suspension theory. Really? Yeah,
got suspended for a year. Got a taste of the good life
away from football. He's never been the same.
When's that team win a playoff game?
But this is a weird theory because you wouldn't say that you've never been the same. When did that team win a playoff game? This is a weird
theory because you wouldn't say
that you've never been the same, right?
I've never been the same.
I've written like 10 columns.
Alright.
It's true.
I'm another example.
You wrote three columns and went right to Corolla.
I did the Eye of the Tiger.
Dallas and San Francisco. Speaking of the eye of the tiger.
Oh, my God.
This has all the makings of just a terrible loss for you.
Yeah.
It really does.
I can just see it.
I have Dallas by three and a half.
I definitely think you don't cover.
And you probably lose.
And it's going to be in the stupidest way possible.
I have three and a half also.
It's Dallas by three.
Yeah, probably.
No Dez, it looks like.
So what's wrong with Dez?
I don't think Jason Garrett was supposed to say anything,
but Dez has like a crack in his foot.
And it's one of those things where he might tough it out,
but he might miss three weeks.
A crack in his foot sounds bad.
Yeah, some kind of weird fracture in his foot.
Supposedly he reeked of gasoline.
Many, many
years now. That's a Michael Irvin move.
I don't like this spot
either. This is tough. Des is dressed like a
gas station attendant.
Yeah, that's a tough game.
If you win, you're supposed to win.
If you lose, you feel like shit.
There's nothing good about that game.
So our best late game, I would say, is Broncos-Bucs.
One thing I will say with Dallas, they play Cincy and Green Bay in the next two weeks.
I don't want to say this is a must win, but it would be nice to beat 3-1 after that.
So what did you say?
The best late game?
I said Bucs-Broncos, I think is the best one.
I want to see...
I'm both foreign against Trevor Simeon. Best late game? I said Bucks-Broncos. I think it's the best one. I want to see.
I'm both foreign against Trevor Simeon.
I like the way he carries himself.
I think he has poise.
I think he's made good plays.
On the other hand, I've personally witnessed like seven dropped interceptions. I was just going to say, at least three.
How many underthrown touchdowns has he had?
It's like Manning took all of the weird Manning old guy karma that he had
and just gave it to him.
I know.
And I can't tell if he's good or not.
Bengals are so bad.
It does seem like he has a game in him where he's going to have like six turnovers.
Like all of the karma that he's been able to get away with
at some point is going to come back to haunt him.
But I don't know when.
Doesn't matter.
Bradford, Simeon, Wentz.
Defense is so good.
None of this matters anymore yeah
kansas city of pittsburgh
steelers by four i don't feel good about that pick you shouldn't i said steelers by six it is six
exactly this you i'd be i want to i don't think this is our teaser game i think we're done with
teasers we can't find two teams i think the Chiefs could win this game.
Yeah.
The Chiefs had one bad half, right?
No.
They got killed by San Diego.
Yeah, that was...
Oh, right.
Okay.
Who was the second?
And then they came back...
Oh, they lost to the Texans.
Yeah, right.
That was not a good game.
The Chiefs have had three bad halves out of six.
Only 50% of their games have been miserable.
I can't get a feel for the Chiefs.
This is tough.
That's a stay away.
It's a tough one.
Monday night, Giants at Vikings.
Where do you stand on the Sunday night football song these days?
I don't even know what it is.
What is it?
That's not even the song, right?
Whatever.
I told you, it feels like a cowboy loss.
I still can't shake it.
All the Sunday stuff.
Night stuff.
Giants at Minnesota.
Vikings by four.
I like this spot for the Giants.
They're just not meant to be favored.
They're not meant to be favored in any game. My new strategy is take the Giants. They're just not meant to be favored. They're not meant to be favored in any game.
My new strategy is take the Giants as an underdog and go
against them as a favorite. I just think that's
a safe bet. What's the line?
It's four and a half, but we both had four.
Let me
tally these scores real quick.
One, two, three, four, five, six, seven. We had eight
ties. Besides that,
I won four to three.
You beat me again. So you can continue
not sending your picks. That's fine.
That's good. I feel like you might
have cheated. Here's why Minnesota's scary.
They've been down...
Have they been down two scores in every game?
Or the Packers were up 7-0, I guess.
But they were down 10-0 to Tennessee.
They were down 10-0 to Carolina.
If this team gets used to being down and winning,
and that defense is as dominant as it is, they're going to be unstoppable.
Phenomenal start for them.
That's all.
They win at Tennessee.
They beat Green Bay.
They beat Carolina.
If they get through this one, they have Houston at home,
bye week, at Philly, at Chicago, Detroit, at Washington,
home for Zona, at Detroit on Thanksgiving, home for Dallas, at Jacksonville,
home for Indy, at Green Bay on a Saturday, and then Chicago.
That's a lot of road games.
That feels like 13 and 3.
What did it have, 12 road games?
What was that?
You know, when we did our wins pool, I had a choice between the Giants and Minnesota,
and I just couldn't talk myself into Sam Bradford.
And I had the next pick, and you between the Giants and Minnesota and I just couldn't talk myself into San Bradford and I had the next pick and you took the Giants
but I knew you wouldn't take Houston
I had the pick before you and I took Minnesota
and then you emailed me like
you fell into my trap
and now who's winning this wins pool
you did
I really wanted to take Houston
but I knew you weren't taking Houston
so it was between the Giants and Minnesota.
And I thought I got all smart and cute by taking the Giants.
Meanwhile, you ended up with the best team out of three.
Which proves yet again that I'm an idiot.
Well, watch the Giants win.
It won't matter.
Minnesota's D is great.
So good.
I don't think they're going to miss Peterson at all.
Isn't it weird?
Eh.
Running backs.
I guess. Unless it's a bad running back like the patriots when they lost yards you're giving up right there now you have to go between
mckinnon and asiata and it's probably gonna work but but on the other hand it's 1600 yards but you
feel like you have to involve him all the time yeah you know it's it's almost like a basketball
thing when there's a guy who has to get his 20 shots right right it kind of maybe that's what part of it is i don't know the karma of getting him off
the team yeah oh that defense is solid it's really good i hate it the vikes man it's all happening
um what do you have to plug that's it jimmymel Live tonight, Thursday. Army Hammer Piper Bernabo
I didn't write that. And Damian
Marley. And Matthew
Cousin Sal on Twitter. Cousin Sal
sure thing on Friday. Yeah.
9 a.m. Pacific
You're like even for the week?
I went one and two. I hit my best bet.
Oh, but money-wise I was about even.
Money-wise you're like even for the year, right?
I'm up like seven700 or $800.
Oh, there you go.
We gave away $1,000.
We had everyone guess how many drop passes and fumbles there would be in the games.
And after six days of studying, figuring this out, we arrived at a number.
So someone won $1,000.
I'm not sure who.
You know, drops is not an official stat.
So you have to go.
That's ludicrous.
It's crazy.
Yeah.
So it changes throughout the year.
So that's it.
This week we'll have another 1,000 to give away.
I have something that I think we should do with the Sunday games.
What is it?
I think we should bet Europe in the Ryder Cup.
I went on Shack House, the House Shackleford podcast.
Love it.
And the U.S. is favored to win the Ryder Cup.
They've lost five of the last six.
I looked at the team.
I don't know.
There's a million props.
I have to send them to you.
I think we just go against it and either try to buy the win for America or profit off their
loss.
It's one or the other.
Are you watching
no TV?
Are you excited
for TV to come back?
The Affair's coming back.
Oh, that TV.
Yeah, I don't watch that.
Westworld?
Westworld,
the Ringer staff
likes Westworld.
Do they?
Yeah.
I'm going to have to
load up on that.
Bullish on Westworld.
I think the new
It's a Ratio
is going to be good.
I'm finishing Narcos.
What else is there?
Something else is coming back,
right?
Survivor's been good.
Yeah.
I like Survivor.
I like it.
Yeah, the millennials, they chose not to build.
How lucky.
You did a great thing.
I love that Jeff Probst thing.
Thanks.
And I think I was the only one.
No, no.
It was like five other people.
No, it was great.
How lucky is Survivor after 32 years, 23 years, whatever it is, that they need like six days of miserable weather and 25 days of great weather.
And they almost get it precisely in that ratio every time.
And then this time, this year, just a horrific storm that they had to evacuate.
It's interesting.
There's a lot of luck involved.
You know what else they evacuated is trying to load the cast with attractive females.
They've just given up.
You're right.
They've just given up.
I don't know.
I don't know what the strategy is anymore.
They never had.
Yeah,
that's not great.
Every year,
just have the aspiring actress on there.
Right.
And have like the one meathead.
Like those,
those two characters always work.
Come on survivor.
Yeah.
Um,
I would encourage you to watch
atlanta on fx god that's my favorite show right now i hate this that's my favorite tony says to
watch gamora you say atlanta well someone else told me atlanta too on fx atlanta's good and i
think westworld's gonna be good at the buzzes let me ask you do you trust the ringer watch
these shows with your wife or do you yeah you do so they have to be awake
like i could watch a show but i have to watch with the wife too and i can't knock them out like
three at a time because she goes to bed at uh 8 17 we talk about like netflix cheating yeah yeah
that's it there's a new amanda knox i know the guy who did the amanda knox documentary that's
going to be on netflix and supposedly that's amazing too really i think there's this is going to be a really nice tv runway and the
sarah jessica parker show is going to be good you just can't ever stop watching i love tv yeah i
talked to um i at the emmy's party more tyranny from the affair nice was with our friend daniel
and they were talking it was two in the morning and i went up to them
he introduced me whatever and then uh and then i whispered to daniel i went on a date with her
sister 20 years ago oh what do you think daniel's reaction to that was he's like just stays between
us thanks for the information. Nope. Wrong.
Wrong.
Ah, Bill Ayers.
Hey, Bill Ayers.
What?
Hey, Bill Ayers.
Drags her over and it turns into a whole conversation about the date.
Yeah.
Just classic.
Why tell that guy anything?
Well, he had probably 16.
What'd you do?
What?
Kettle one and tonics in him.
It was great. That's your fault.
Well, now, I mean, he's living the high life now.
Josh said to do a time life. Yeah. Or was great. That's your fault. Well, now, I mean, he's living the high life now. Josh signed a deal
with Time Life.
Yeah.
Or Time Inc.
Josh and Bob.
Time something.
Mm-hmm.
Bob.
They got part of Bob, too.
Oh, they got some Bob?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I didn't realize
Bob was involved.
Of course, yeah.
Josh and Bob.
Thanks to Sonos,
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that streams all your
favorite music to any room
or every room
at South's house
on Halloween because we're getting one.
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Go to Sonos.com right now.
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Don't forget about my new HBO show, Any Given Wednesday.
Every Wednesday at 10 p.m., please watch the one this week with Charlemagne and Abby Wambach
I tried to say pro women's soccer in this one
you tried to stay pro?
why?
pro women's soccer
the professional women's soccer league doesn't work
it's failed
so I had an idea
that we kind of fleshed out
which I was excited about
extra clips on HBO Go, HBO On Demand.
Don't forget to check out TheRinger.com or our eight other podcast feeds, including Ringer
University, which launched last week.
And don't forget about Cousin Sal's Shore Thing on Facebook Friday.
What time?
Friday, 9 Pacific, noon Eastern.
You don't really miss the ESPN guys.
No.
I don't either.
I miss the guys.
You miss Neil Everett.
Yeah, I miss Neil.
I miss Stan.
You don't miss going to...
It's more fun to go to Bristol
than the LA Live studio, probably.
I haven't been,
only to visit Bristol.
I mean, not Bristol,
Vegas.
Oh, Vegas is better.
Yeah.
How many?
You've done two Vegas?
Vegas is better than Bristol, too.
You go to Vegas?
I'm there all the time.
It's too much.
This is your dream come true.
Yeah, it's good.
Your whole life
has been leading to this.
Except when you have to go every week it's great because as always a pleasure oh we never came up with the teas it's just not there you know what we're gonna we're gonna end up throwing Cincinnati
on something you know we are Tate don't let me do that you know we are don't let me do that please
for the love of god all All right. Thanks for listening.
On Friday, we're going to have Mike Lombardi, Joe House.
We're going to do The Callaway Part 3.
And I'm going to make Jacko come on.
He's in a really raw place right now.
But I'm going to have him come on to say farewell to David Ortiz
and also give his thoughts on the debate.
So we will see you on Friday in the BS Podcast.
Thanks, Sal.
Good job by you.
Good job by you, Billy.
Anytime y'all want to see me again,
rewind this track right here,
close your eyes,
and picture me rolling.