The Bill Simmons Podcast - Ep. 159: NFL Wild-Card Weekend Lines With Cousin Sal

Episode Date: January 2, 2017

HBO and The Ringer’s Bill Simmons is joined by Cousin Sal to discuss Week 17 (1:22), the NFL MVP odds (9:43), who should be coach of the year (15:35), and the new coaching vacancies (17:22).They also cover this weekend's playoff matchups: Texans-Raiders (26:45), Lions-Seahawks (34:09), Dolphins-Steelers (40:15), and Giants-Packers (49:00). Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Today's episode of the BS Podcast, the first one of 2017, brought to you by SeatGeek, our presenting sponsor, the only fan-friendly app for buying and selling tickets for sports and music. Drop your old ticket app. Use one built for 2017 and beyond. You can even do absolutely everything on your phone. Download the free SeatGeek app or go to SeatGeek.com. We're also brought to you by Channel 33.

That's the Ringer's pop culture podcast that just launched our new show, the Sports Movie Hall of Fame. I am the host, along with Chris Ryan. We inducted Jerry Maguire and Moneyball already. We have another one coming this week. Subscribe to Channel 33 right now to hear every episode. Sal, what Sports Movie Hall of Fame show do you want to do with us? Oh, you name it.

What's your favorite one, though? Or what's one you just have a lot of thoughts on? Oh, vision. Is that a love story or is that a sports movie? I'm not sure. I mean, it's both,

but no, it's a sports. Okay. Yeah. All right. We'll do a vision quest. Check out the ringer.com. Not just for all of our great content,

but because I have a new column coming this week, later in the week. All right. This is it. The playoff round one podcast. Here we go. I'm here with a traumatized cousin, Sal. I've never been this bad. I don't know what was the worst idea.

Me naming my show any given Wednesday. Stop that. And being unable to move the show off of Wednesday if maybe it wasn't the right day. Yeah. Or you naming your thing the Cousin Sal Sure Thing and leaving yourself no leeway in case it turned out not to be a sure thing one of these weeks. You're doing this on Facebook. You're in an 0-6 slump.

Well, Wednesday's a definite day of the year. A sure thing could mean, you know, just fade me. That's a sure thing. Oh, necessarily? Yeah, right, right. Okay, so now you go the other way. Yeah. You can get this back.

Oh, I've been awful. I don't know what it is. I would compare this to a boxer, maybe a little like Rousey. Oh, yeah? After the first fight when Rousey lost her way, but then didn't get it back. I think you can get it back. Rousey, what do you mean? She's got it back?

No, no, she didn't get it back. I think you can get it back. Oh, I can get it back. Rousey lost. She disappeared for a year. Yeah. And then came back and fought somebody who had a similar style to the person who knocked her out the exact same way. And got pounded even worse.

I think you can adjust. All right. I think you may have had a couple missteps. One of which was you put the Raiders in a tease. Yeah. You put a bad quarterback in a tease. You don't like that usually. That just told me that you just lost your fundamentals a little bit.

Really? I thought getting a touchdown against Denver could be a close game, but Denver doesn't score that much usually. You didn't think that was one of those if they're down 10-0, the game's over, though? Yeah, I thought that almost immediately after I saw a couple minutes of the game. You didn't get it back. That was bad.

It's a confidence shake. What you need to do is what Aaron Rodgers did. Just run the table? Aaron Rodgers was like, my team doesn't seem confident right now. I'm going to say we're. Just run the table? Aaron Rodgers was like, I don't like, my team doesn't seem confident right now. I'm going to say we're going to run the table. And then he told Peter King, now who knows if this is bullshit or not, but he's like,

I thought our team needed some swagger. So I threw that out there. And if it didn't happen, it was on me. Interesting. I think you need to throw it out there that you're going to go 10 and one in the playoffs. I'm going to contact Peter King.

You should call Peter King and tell him you're guaranteeing 10 and one. the problem is these round one playoff games are terrible which we're gonna get to but uh should we talk about rousey just as long as you were to go from bad to good we we did win that we had our lions bet which we've discussed many times in this podcast that they would not make the playoffs along with the browns and niners who want to combine three games somehow the lions did make the playoffs along with the Browns and Niners who won a combined three games. Somehow the Lions did make the playoffs winning nine. And they made us sweat it out. It was a vicious trick the gambling gods played on us.

We should have been done with this bet. We should have lost it a month ago, but the Lions kept losing. The Packers kept winning. We just needed another wild card team to sneak in there, and we needed it to be Washington. We had a chance to hedge and we could have hedged with the redskins against the giants although i don't know really how we even would have hedged that just bet the giants no so yeah like the redskins to make the playoffs

was about even odd so you could go you could we could have taken the other side of that oh yeah that's but then we also would have had to sweat out the packer game but we were both pretty confident in the packers right i will say though i didn't hear one person like the lions all week in any walk of life either people in my life people i read people on tv never heard anybody like no don't sleep on this lions team at home everyone's like the packers packers packers and then the packers actually won and covered, which doesn't happen that often. Everybody won on that Packers game. Yeah, and that they moved it to the night game.

People maybe had lost money. Like, this is the one you're going to double up on. It was like free money. So there were three potential teases in Week 17 yesterday. The Chiefs, the Redskins. Everyone who needed to win won except the redskins everyone who needed to win one except and then the falcons yeah right but i think the redskins probably killed some people you could say your patriots were in there too it was a pretty high line yeah i think what everybody forgot and thomas boswell

wrote a good piece about this last night in the washington post is that the giants and the redskins just hate each other and the giants were like screw this we're not rolling over so you get in the playoffs. And they played as hard as just about any team yesterday. It's amazing. They really wanted it. They benched Odell in the second half and that was it. Yeah.

That could have sat their starters. No reason. No, they're locked into the five seed, except that they knew we bet that. And they will screw us every turn we make. They're going to screw us, the Giants. The team that I keep looking at, you know, you think like there's 12 playoff teams. All right, who should have made it that didn't? I think the Cardinals were the team that just if you play the season 10 times,

I think they make it like eight as the sixth seed. Right. And then maybe one, everything goes wrong. And then there's one where they had a season late they had this time. They lose in week one to the Patriots. That's it. If they get up for that game, maybe it changes everything. Maybe if they didn't just take your Patriots for granted.

Well, that's so tight, but they miss it. People forget that they missed the field goal to win the game. Right. The guy had a field goal. He just missed it. And then they had another field goal from like 25 to beat the Seahawks in the tie, which they missed. Right.

So those are two wins. So now they're nine and seven instead of seven, eight, one. And then they had the Rams, i think in like week five at home they lose to case keenum 17 13 on a late uh tayvon austin punt return case keenum gets the go-ahead thing but palmer got knocked out was in the concussion protocol right but really they played the rams and niners four times and they somehow ended up with seven wins total, and that team had a lot of talent. To me, it's like, how do you not win 10 games with your schedule?

I look at the AFC, and I look at the Texans right now, and I say, and even the Raiders, even though it's not their fault, but how much better are the Broncos and Ravens than that game that we're going to see on? The Texans-Raiders. Yes. I mean, I would even throw in the Bengals. Cincinnati?

I was going to say possibly. How many teams? That's a good one. How many teams would be favored over the Texans or the Raiders who didn't make the playoffs? Yeah, hold on. In the AFC or just overall? I'm going to go in general.

Would the Cardinals be favored over either of those teams? I think so. Tampa Bay? Tampa Bay, definitely. Washington? Yeah, I mean, sure. Tennessee would. The Colts, maybe.

I mean, it's at least a pick-em with any of these teams. I don't love that Colts team. I know, but there's a half dozen. Who would you rather have, the Bills or either of those playoff teams? Probably the two playoff teams. I don't know. The Vikings? The Saints definitely would be favorite.

Chargers, Saints for sure. Saints and Bucks definitely. Cards maybe. Eagles? I mean, those two teams are about as good as the Eagles. They're all pick-em games for sure. And that's the thing with the Raiders. They lose Carr, and then you think, well, there's enough there.

And then you actually watch them, and it's like, well, their receivers are now out. They have these two good receivers who are now useless because they're quarterbacks. Anybody can stack the run against them, and their defense was kind of a little smoke and mirrors-y all year except for Khalil Mack. Well, everyone's got a very definite opinion about MVP this year, and it's very strange to me because you shouldn't.

And if that Raiders game showed you anything, it's like maybe Derek Carr's the MVP. Maybe Matt Ryan, 35 points in the first half. Thank you for only scoring three in the second half and the worst backdoor cover in the history of the game. Do you want to talk about that? What was it, 38-13? They scored 19 points. Yeah, because they scored 19-0 in the fourth quarter.

I did not put the Falcons as one of my super contest picks because that 7 and a half points in the Drew Brees garbage time touchdown, I just kept looking at it. It was the only reason. I was like, boy, you could be up 14 with two minutes left and the Saints would have the ball and I would feel like I was going to lose. So I stayed away. God bless Drew Brees, but he did get an onside, right?

He had the onside kick and that's the way to do it. Did you see it? It was kicked to the first level of guys who don't even look at the ball they're just trying to block they really don't look at it the hard line drive to the legs it was kicked at their feet they didn't and even when it hit their feet no one even scrambled to recover but drew breeze is a hall of famer he's got great numbers he's got a super bowl win but he's getting dangerously close to 50 of his yards being meaningless garbage time. He was kind of quietly our garbage time MVP this year.

Every 7-9 year. Normally it's Matt Stafford. Every 7-9 year he gets that percentage goes up and up. Last year was Bortles. This year was probably Breeze. Had to be Breeze. Yeah. I would agree with that. You couldn't kill him. So, MVP.

Let's talk about that. I'm the biggest homer you know. Yeah, I would agree with that. You couldn't kill him. So MVP, let's talk about that. Yeah, so. I'm the biggest homer you know. Sure. Especially post the flake gate. It briefly drove me insane. And you don't say Brady.

You don't think Brady. I think he had to go 12-0 to win the MVP. Wow. Yeah, I think if he went 12-0, you'd have to be like, all right, he's the MVP. So Ryan's plus 120. Rodgers 2-1. Brady 3-1. Zeke Elliott 3-1. Brady 2-1. Brady 3-1. Zeke Elliott 3-1. Brady 2-1. Elliott 3-1. Prescott

then 75-1 and Le'Veon Bell 75-1. I had a I checked the sportsbook odds. Matt Ryan was plus 140. Uh-huh. And Elliott and Dak were like 30-1. Check it again. Hold on. Or maybe that was a mistake? I'll look right now. But Matt Ryan's definitely the favorite.

Right? Yeah, I'm looking at it. Ryan, 120. Rodgers, two. Brady, two. Oh, Elliott, 30 to one. Yeah. Oh, so it's...

Right, you're right. So it's really those three. I gotta say, I think it's absolutely... I said it last week. I think it's absolutely Matt Ryan. You do? Yeah. They...

310 yards a game. Mm-hmm. 38 touchdowns, seven picks. He missed Julio. I was wrong last week. He only missed him for two and a half games, basically. Much tougher schedule than the Pats played. Really? You think so?

He basically played. Yeah, he played a lot of good defenses. They just beat the Rams and Niners down the stretch in the Saints defense. Yeah, but I mean, during the season, I think they played a tougher schedule. Brady just kind of lucked out with those 12 games that he had, like Landry Jones instead of Roethlisberger. That Steelers game was kind of the big litmus test game, and then Roethlisberger doesn't play. Seattle was the one really good team they played,

and that's not even a top-five team. I don't know. I love Brady, but it's just hard for me to believe 12 games wins the MVP. What if you did win above replacement thing and you just took the most average quarterback? And that's probably like Andy Dalton at this point, right? If Andy Dalton's on Atlanta, what's their record? I like this game. Yeah.

Well, but if you're doing this game. We'll do it for every team. But then Dak's the MVP if you do this. Well, let's do it. Because if you replace Dak with any other backup QB, they're a three-win team. Not backup. I'm saying average, like the 15th best quarterback in the NFL.

But with Dak, you'd have to replace him with an average backup. No, just put Andy Dalton on the Cowboys, put him on the Patriots, put him on the Falcons. What are those teams' records? So you're saying if dalton was the falcons quarterback they go eight and eight they maybe i think they go like nine and seven if caroppolo was the pats quarterback the whole year yeah i think we go 10 and 6 or 11 and 5 yeah i do right do as awesome as brady was i just think that i think the whole the team and the coaching

and the schedule you know i give it to aaron rogers i do so you think if whole team and the coaching and the schedule, you know. I give it to Aaron Rodgers. I do. So you think if Dalton was the Packers quarterback, the thing is they only won 10 games. They're going to go 6-10, 7-9 with him. Yeah. Yeah, I think that's a good enough difference. Let's just say it's a shitty MVP year.

I don't know. I think it's pretty compelling. No, I mean, it's compelling, but there's no, oh, that guy's definitely. Ran away with it? Everybody's got some sort of piccadillo. Like, Rodgers didn't look good the first two months. I guess, but now he's throwing passes to Geronimo Allison and finding him like. I know.

It does seem like every five plays, Rodgers is good for a 19-yard pass play. You know? Yeah. Well, he had that one play in the red zone when he just scrambled around for nine seconds and did Rodgers things. You knew it was going to happen, too. Yeah. He's still the best at that. Brady was great.

And the two interceptions thing is out of its mind. But I think he had to go 12-0 to win it. I think he'll get votes. But I think Matt Ryan's going to end up winning it. Because as we said last week, 11-5, they got boned over on the Julio call in Seattle. They should have won that game, the interference. They didn't get it.

And then the two-point reversion, which was his fault. Right. But I don't know. I think they were actually better than an 11-5 team. I'm okay with any of those four even getting it. But not Andy Dalton. You're not okay with that. No, not Andy Dalton.

But even if you put, like, even do the replacement with Zeke Elliottton. You're not okay with that. No, not Andy Dalton. But even if you put like, even do the replacement with Zeke Elliott, put like Spencer Ware. Let's say he's the most average running back. What's a Cowboys record with Spencer Ware? Right. I think it's like nine and seven. If we're going to do this,

you could say maybe Le'Veon Bell is the MVP. Yeah. If you replace him with, I'm trying to think of somebody. Well, the problem is D'Angelo Williams had a couple of good games before Bell got there. Oh, yeah, you're right. Maybe there's no MVP.

Maybe we roll it over. Let's skip it this year. We've had NBA years like this where I thought they should roll it over like in skins and the next one's worth two trophies. As long as we're talking about getting rid of awards or skipping awards, how about that Sam Bradford record? Let's throw that out the window. He's the most accurate passer of all time in single season.

What does that even mean? It just throws the most accurate check down, three-yard completions? Yeah, we've seen it all year long. That was a rough trade, man. What are they going to do? Because they made that trade. They were really adamant. Like, we think this is a Super Bowl team.

Right. We think this team, we have the pieces. And it was like they completely that trade. They were really adamant. Like, we think this is a Super Bowl team. Right. We think this team, we have the pieces. And it was like they completely fell apart. Hey, I want to talk about MeUndies really quick. They sponsored the first podcast we ever did. They sent me a big box of comfortable underwear. I've been wearing them ever since.

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For a limited time, every BAS podcast listener gets 20% off their first order. Go to speciallyurlmeandys.com slash BS again, 20% off plus free shipping, 20% off your first order at meandys.com slash BS. All right. Coach of the year. Yeah. I think it's,

I think it's your guy again. It has to be right. Yeah. And I hate to say it. But then why don't you say Brady? You'd say because he could have done it with Garavalo. Yeah. 12 games is tough for me.

Interesting. I like this. It is. I just feel like I already feel like I'm enough of a homer. But to argue that somebody's 12 games are better than Matt Ryan's 16. Doesn't feel right for me. Brady is, you know, what can you say about him? He makes you pay, though.

He really does make you pay if you screw up. Look at the Dolphins, and I needed them to cover yesterday, and they didn't. You know, they were driving with eight minutes left and fumbled the seven. But he just makes you pay. He'll find Edelman, he'll be patient and he picks you apart. And that's nothing we haven't heard about Brady before. Here's the reason that if I had to vote,

I would vote for Brady because it wasn't his fault that he got suspended for four games. So if you're going to make that case and be like, why should this guy be penalized? Because he got railroaded by the NFL. What do you mean by that? Well, he cheated. What are you talking about?

He did not cheat. He was exonerated in every step of the way. I thought we agreed on this. Is there anybody else you would vote for coach to the other than Belichick? Um, Jack Del Rio. Del Rio. They usually go for whoever kind of came out of nowhere versus the Popovich

Belichick guy who just every year is awesome. But the Pats went 14 and two, which I don't think we've had the highest wins total in like five or six years. Is that right? Yeah. Wow. Yeah.

Usually they... How does Belichick fare? Do they just usually skip him or does he get it? I think that media just doesn't like him. But has he won in the last... How many times has he won the coach of the year? I think only like once. Let's look this up.

Let's talk about coaches really quick because there's six open jobs. Denver, San Diego, Jacksonville, Buffalo, Rams, Niners, and possibly the Saints if Sean Payton gets traded. Which job would you want? If you're a coach. Denver. You're a hot candidate.

Of course, Denver. You'd want Denver. Sure, yeah. They're the closest, I think. You're working for John Elway, though. Yeah. Who does seem like he has a healthy ego at this point he's running out a couple coaches he's running a couple qbs he went against tebow he murdered tim tebow's career right i don't know i'd be a little scared to work for him well

i don't think you're going 3 and 13 so i think you're getting you're not getting chip kelly you're not going to get canned your first year. True. Right? You don't have a quarterback. What kind of injury? I would want San Diego. You want San Diego? Yeah.

I want them to talk, by the way. I'm playing in Carson, California for two years in front of 27,000 people, which I actually think is this crazy experiment that's going to work. That would be awesome. 27,000 people would be incredible. Just packed in. What happens when they don't pack it? How can they not. 27,000 people would be incredible. What happens when they don't pack it? How can they not get 27,000 fans?

Watch. Are you going to Carson? No. But there's a bunch of people over there that would. I guess so. I don't like this whole San Diego thing moving because you talked about it last week and how they're going to have to pay

whoever's going to the Rams, you think maybe Gruden, $60 million. You have to do the same for the Chargers. Now you're spending $100 million on two L.A. coaches on bad teams. I don't think you have to do it with the Chargers. You don't? Because I think they're closer than that. Closer to winning.

I think they have good players. Yeah. Because next year, they'll have Keenan Allen back. Gordon will be healthy. They have Bosa. They have a quarterback. They have more players the fans could be excited about. The fans are already done with the Rams.

Another number five pick, number five, number six, whatever that is. I think that's a good job. Yeah. I would much say the Rams thing, I look at that. I wrote down some Rams quotes that I read yesterday. This is from defensive end William Hayes. We just need to change the culture, man. We have to create a winning culture around here.

That's what we're lacking right now. And then tight end Lance Kendrick said, we just need to really have someone that can motivate us. That's right. Not that Jeff Fisher didn't, but we need someone to motivate us. So we need someone to be on our butts

when we mess up. Not that Jeff Fisher didn't. Crazy. They didn't mean no motivation. I think that team is too scarred. Dinosaurs don't exist. Right. That team lost 20 plus points,

six out of their last seven. Wow. I think that's the worst job because not only that, but you have, I mean, how many people went to that game yesterday? They said 55,000.

No way. That wasn't 30. That wasn't 30,000. No way. That's what I mean. The LA doesn't care about these teams. They're going to feel the same way about the Chargers.

No, and I actually think, could you see the Chargers, if they don't sign a lease, stay in kind of San Diego, Orange County, LA limbo for two years and then just jump to some other place that needs a football team? You could bet now that you have to lay three to win one that the Chargers come in LA.

Like, it seems like it's a done deal for next year. That they're coming to LA? Yeah. I don't understand it. I don't either. I don't understand how they're going to fill that giant stadium every week. There are 16 home games a year in LA,

and I don't understand who's going. No. Even if the team is 13-3, I think it would be dicey. But does it matter? I mean mean from an owner's perspective there's a franchise increase in value so much that it doesn't matter if you fill the fill as long as you don't read the articles about yourself if you don't fill the stadium is your net value going up that much so it doesn't matter and well for crocky it's great he doesn't care right he's he's the number two market i don't understand the point with the chargers right and if what's weird is maybe they should go to oakland because it seems like oakland should have a football team the

oakland chargers that'd be weird yeah at that point you just change your name right you do like what uh the tennessee titans did right from the houston where there's the tennessee titans you pretend you don't even have a legacy were you surprised chip kelly got fired a little bit like i don't i don't love the guy but that is kind of that's a great f you if he actually had a chance to go back to oregon and told them no and then they canned them two one year and out coaches i don't think we'll ever see again in our lifetime. No, right. I was thinking, I'm trying to put this together in my head, but Colin Kaepernick won. Does every team do this?

They vote on the most courageous player on the team or something? He won for the Niners. The Niners, the teammates vote. I wonder if upper management is like, Chip Kelly kind of made a hero of this guy. We didn't even want him starting and all of a sudden not only was he decent but now he's well liked by the teams like we need to start everything over it was a mess that's interesting i didn't think of that i i was just thinking that they hired this guy who was supposedly innovative yeah and when you watch them play it was one of

the least innovative teams that's the part i didn't understand. Like when he came to the Eagles, it was really fun for like three weeks. I didn't necessarily thought what he did was going to work. Right. But at least he was different. And the way they looked was different in the plays they ran. And now by the end of the San Francisco thing, they were just conventional. I think they needed to do something. Kaepernick never scrambled or did anything.

Right. But there was also like the leadership thing. I mean, they came off like a season, an off season, where three 25-year-olds retired, you know? Right. They needed somebody in that clubhouse, like, make it exciting to play for you. And he didn't do that.

Would you rather be the Browns or the Niners? I think the Niners. I think I'd rather be the Browns. Oh, they're just so cursed. They got the first pick and the ninth pick. In really good draft i'm gonna get my cough out of here they never get they don't have a quarterback still aren't they gonna take miles garrett he's gonna be the number one pick i do this every year i know nothing about college football and every year i know who the number one pick is gonna be everyone tries to be oh maybe this guy maybe

this guy it's like you know what's gonna be is the guy who's the best quarterback. Right, right. That's who it is every year. They're getting excited. Their ninth pick is going to be the tackle for Central Michigan. Like, who cares at this point? But, you know, how do you get the fans excited now? Did you see Tennessee has the fifth pick from the Rams?

Right? Yeah, from the Rams. Yeah. They have fifth and 18th. That's pretty good. To go with, I don't know, a pretty nice team. Do us a favor. Win the division next year, Tennessee.

Put us out of this misery. They were definitely the best team. Where your division leader is locked into that Saturday early game. Just in the playoffs. Yeah, we're going to talk about those games in a second. The one other thing I wanted to ask you was, what was your favorite Georgia Dome memory that's it huh

that was it do you remember can you name three things that happened in the Georgia Dome Thurman Thomas forgot his helmet against the Cowboys I feel like there was a bad Morton Anderson field goal or something I don't know

that was in Minnesota they don't call the minnesota georgia dome michael vick when he beat the packers and cost everyone a lot of money including us that was in lambo yeah that was in lambo i was in lambo wow i don't know i mean uh wasn't there like matt ryan didn't he come back to beat russell wilson like four years ago i think he did russell wilson. Russell Wilson took the year I was like when Russell Wilson was a rookie. I was totally into him.

It was like a running thing the whole year, but I actually kind of believed it. There had to be a SummerSlam or a WrestleMania there or something. Nothing? The Olympics maybe? Mike Vick? PETA protests? I can't think. They were like, we're saying goodbye to the Georgia Dovers. Oh, okay.

It seems like it's a new state jesus yeah new thing 25 25 uh years of the georgia dome and somehow we're ready for another one hey are you hiring sal yeah do you know where to post your job to find the best candidates well posting your job in one place isn't enough anymore for the perfect hire you need to post your job on all the top job sites, and now you can. ZipRecruiter.com. Post your job to 100-plus job sites, including social media networks like Facebook and Twitter, all with a single click. Find candidates in any city or industry. Post once.

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Once again, ZipRecruiter.com slash BS. All right. Well, ZipRecruiter is nice, if I may just jump in for a second. You think they should open the NFL coaches or no? Yeah, why not? But, you know, if you can't do that, our friend Daniel found the CFO for his company on Facebook. Oh, that's true. Yeah, just as a backup.

He goes ZipRecruiter first, but then. Daniel did send an email to all his friends looking for a CFO. That was great. He got Cody points for that. He did. He ended up third. Yeah. You did the character of the year awards last week.

Right. Yeah. Yeah. My friends, Ken and Harry are at the top. They're just monsters. Our agent, James Babydoll Dixon, he's also a monster. Brad Mulcahy is great. Brad's great.

Yeah. So I would say this is the worst Saturday of playoff games we've ever had. Saturday. Oh, yeah. Round one. I'm not excited is the worst Saturday of playoff games we've ever had. Saturday. Oh, yeah. Round one. I'm not excited about the whole batch. You knew right away that Raiders-Texans was going to be the first early Saturday game. I've never been more convinced of anything in my entire life than that was going to be what we call the Shakey's game.

Right. Because we go to Shakey's. That's where our banquet is, our fantasy banquet. Our fantasy football banquet. And there's always a terrible game on. The one year there wasn't was Pittsburgh-Denver when Tebow did the overtime touchdown. That was good. So you compare it to that,

which is like the best you can do with the early Saturday game. And it's usually Cincinnati at Houston or Kansas City at Houston, but that Houston team usually has J.J. Watt. There's something to be excited about. This is McGloin or or connor cook against osweiler or tom savage i can't ever remember a worst quarterback battle in the playoffs and i'm gonna go this far i like to bet on every playoff game put things in teases i'm staying away you're skipping it staying away right we're running out of games though is the

problem you gotta bet everything i i mean i'll pick it but i can't imagine putting money on this i'm sure i'll talk myself into it but this is a play-in game basically this is unc nashville against uh mount st mary's oh like the tuesday yeah this is a tuesday march bad the winner plays kansas yeah it's really bad we were robbed of our freebie all year since week four we We're like, all right, Houston or someone bad is going to win a division. We'll take Kansas city or Oakland, whoever's on the road. They'll give a touchdown. We'll put them in a money line parlay with one of the other three favorites.

We were robbed. So I'm sorry, Raiders fans, but Derek Carr really screwed me and bill more than you guys. I don't know what to do with this game. Because you're taking out the quarterbacks completely so now it's running game defense home field advantage

Houston will have the home field advantage which is good that crowd is pretty iffy that crowd checks out pretty quickly and that crowd gets real quiet most football stadiums now aren't very good with the exception of a select few.

That's one of the ones that stands out for me is just super quiet. It's not good? Really? Yeah. Like you can see when you're flicking games and it's just like dead silence. Yeah. And they just don't like the team. They haven't had a lot to cheer about.

Not a time to be excited about. No, I don't blame them. Right. But I just think like if Osweiler starts that game and starts off badly. I don't want to watch this. The crowd checks out. Also, how many Raider fans are going to be there? The Raider fans travel for this.

Is it like a Raiders, Steelers, Packers fan situation? They do a nice job for that. Yeah. Could we have 25,000 Raider fans there? Vegas doesn't think so. Let's just put it that way. We were watching football yesterday and I said to the people I was with,

I'm like 20 minutes away from saying that Matt McGlynn looks pretty good. Like he was throwing nice pass. He has arm strength and he's not inaccurate. And then he got hurt. And then they just kept showing him with a sad look on his face. I had the Raiders by two and a half in Houston.

I had Raiders by three. You were off five and a half points, and you won. It's Houston by three. Oh, wow. Okay. Now you're betting it. Wow. Now you're putting Matt McGloin.

So that's just all home field advantage. Now you're putting Matt McGloin. So that's just all home field advantage. Now you're putting Matt McGloin in the teaser. Now you're doing what you told me not to do, plus nine. What's amazing is that we watched this game in Mexico City like eight weeks ago. Oh, right. And there's nothing to take away from it whatsoever because Derek Carr was in it. Osweiler was playing a little better back then. It was before he lost his confidence.

A couple bad spots in that game, but yeah. I mean, Houston couldn't beat Tennessee yesterday. You could say that they didn't have much to play for, but when Osweiler came in, I would say Osweiler had a shitload to play for. He was trying. Yeah. He had that QB sneak. He goes in. He gets hit by seven guys. I don't like this game. And I'll

tell you this. I don't remember a playoff of a wild card weekend where there are eight teams. Only one of them is hot right now. The Packers, the other seven either lost this week or last week or struggled to win this week. Right?

Like who else is, they're all like flatlining right now. So Houston's D they gave up 27 to the Raiders, 21 to the chargers, 21 to the Packers. That's pretty good. 22 to the Raiders, 21 to the Chargers, 21 to the Packers. That's pretty good. 22 to the Colts, 20 to the Jags, 10 to the Bengals, and then 24 to the Titans yesterday. So my takeaway from that is that it's a solid defense.

They'll keep people. Even without a lot. I would say they would keep a team with a bad quarterback under 20. Right? So that means we're looking at a 17-14, 17-13, 19-16, 13-10 type game. And that would favor home field and defense. Right. So maybe it does make sense. You're not going to give three, though. If you do have to bet this game, and that would favor home field and defense. Right. So maybe it does make sense.

You're not going to give three, though. If you do have to bet this game, are you giving three? Raiders defense, last few weeks gave up 32 to the Panthers, 24 to the Bills, 21 to the Chiefs, 16 to the Chargers, 25 to the Colts, 24 to the Broncos. Not a very good defense. And the advanced metrics back it up. Is this a case of first score wins kind of thing?

If Hopkins gets free for a long touchdown. This game makes you sad. I hear the sadness in your voice. I don't like it. It's a bummer. We're running out of games. It shouldn't count. We only have 11 playoff games to work with,

and this one's a throwaway. I'm telling you, Baltimore and Denver should be on the field at the same time. They should have all four teams on the field. Have one emerge. Do you think it should be like a WWE pay-per-view? Yeah. Where it's like, Oakland was scheduled to play today,

but in their place, the Cincinnati Bengals. They show up in masks. I like it. What a terrible game. I'd like to apologize to America in advance. And then the second one isn't good either. This is at night, Saturday night, Detroit at Seattle. That's the worst Saturday night playoff game I think we've ever had for round one. I thought they were going to steal Giants Green Bay for Saturday night.

They're giving that to Buck Aikman. They'd steal from Fox a lot. You and I could have guessed the exact sequence. Seattle goes Saturday night. Yeah, that Giants-Packers was a guaranteed Sunday game. All right. And your Patriots play Saturday night now. We know that for next week.

We're going to talk about that. Oh, we should talk about that now. Cowboys play late Sunday. The Patriots are guaranteed to go against Matt McGloin, Connor Cook, who looked terrible yesterday, Tom Savage, or Brock Osweiler. Or Matt Moore. Or possibly Ryan Tannehill with a limp.

Possibly. Those are the six quarterbacks that are going to be coming into Foxborough. It's amazing. We're talking, we're not going to guess the line now, but you have to put it close to two touchdowns. I think if Miami's in there, I don't think it gets that high. Tannehill is the best case, lowest number scenario. Is Matt Moore not bad or am I nuts?

No, he's okay. What am I? We'll get there. He wasn't great. I don't think they play Tannehill. I think it's going to be Matt Moore. Really? Yeah, unless Tannehill's healthy, I would play Matt Moore.

Not even this week? Talk about him playing this week. I wouldn't. I wouldn't unless he was healthy. I can't think of anything worse than a hobbled Ryan Tannehill. Well, you'll see it Saturday early. Detroit, Seattle. This is probably too high.

I do not think the Lions are a good football team. It was partially vindicated yesterday by that Packers performance. Seahawks by nine and a half in Seattle, and I don't even think Seattle's a good football team. I went seven, and it's seven and a half.

So you win. So I get that. We're tied going into Sunday. So they're just, they're begging for us to tease that. They are. They're begging us. Now you and I have to figure out, is Detroit done screwing us?

Or do they have one more, just one more gut wrencher in them? Here's the thing. Even though we lost that bet, we won big on the Rousey bet. or do they have one more, just one more gut wrencher in them? Here's the thing. Even though we lost that bet, we won big on the Rousey bet. Right. So I feel like it all evened out. We won on the Seahawks.

I know. I went a little bigger than you did on the playoffs. The Steelers, Rousey. I know. I know, but at least it tempered the blow for me. Why is Rousey not arm barring everybody to death now? Why is she going toe to toe? Rousey needs to get a real trainer. Yeah.

She needs tactics. Right. You can't just wander towards somebody like a walking dead zombie. She just was determined. She just got punched in the face. She's wobbling toward her. That note, Nunez will never lose to a blonde woman again. She was so angry.

They'll never even put her up against a blonde woman. I already felt good about that pick. And then when they said that she made $200,000 and Rousey made $3 million, I was like, I texted you, I wanted to put more money

on Nubia's. It's like, oh my God. Yeah, she's going to be so angry. Or something. So Seahawks. What do you think

the Seahawks home record is without looking? They've blown three games there, right? Five and three? No, they're seven and one. But it doesn't seem like it, right and three? No, they're seven and one. But it doesn't seem like it, right?

You'd never think they were seven and one. I was about to come on here and be like, they lost their home swagger. It's a different team. Seven and one. That team's a mess. I've watched a lot of Seahawks. They have Richard Sherman returning punts.

They have no third down back. That guy Collins at running back is just not very good. I know. It's Collins or Rawls against Zenner. This isins at running back is just not very good i know it's collins or rawls against zinner this is a bad running back matchup you have a really bad quarterback matchup in the early game really bad running back in the in the late game saturday they have uh the offensive line is still abysmal i watched yesterday with danny kelly from the ringer who used to be the chief seahawks blogger in sb nation and knows the team inside out. And he's just so not confident in the Seahawks team.

Yeah, because they've lost too many guys. And their O-line wasn't good to begin with. But Wilson's still great. Yeah. And, you know, the Stafford thing, the middle finger, you know, when he's talking about it, he has to wear a glove to keep the splint in place. I didn't think he was very accurate in that game, Mr. Their defense isn't good.

I thought he threw some good balls. He threw some good balls, and then he sailed some other ones. I don't know. His best one was a Hail Mary. How about Al Michaels all over the gambling talk? That Hail Mary put the game over. He plays it up now. He must have people that mention it to him.

Yeah, it's so good. He's like, overwhelming uh pass the uh i don't know i just don't think detroit's good i can't imagine they would go into seattle and win normally there's there's a scenario where this is a this is an upset game to watch out for i don't think the lions are the team like if this was even if this was that piece of shit redskins team even them i would be like oh maybe they could score and it's like a 34 31 i know cousins cost us a lot of money i just hope he cost himself money too i hope he cost in his next contact contract hope he cost about three months once you tie that game you can't lose to the giants you can't throw an

interception on first down there. It was one of those QB interceptions you could see coming before he threw it. He's scrambling. He's throwing across his body. Had the guy open for a split second. So bad. I want to know what happened to their run game, though.

I know, right? If I'm a Redskins fan, I'm leaving that game going, what happened to Fat Rob? Fat Rob, we were running the ball down people's throats for like a week. And then all of a sudden, that guy Thompson was in all the time. And Fat Rob could only run for one yard to carry. Did they have three points? Did they kick a field goal to start the fourth quarter?

Was that their first points? I'm sick of that game. They were awful. They were really embarrassing. All right, let's move to Sunday. Before we do I want to talk about Vistaprint

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I'm gone. You could skip this. This is it. These are the glory times with my daughter before she turns on me. Oh, come on. She turned. She's got like a year left. I talked to her at New Year's.

She turned on you. We were fine. She said she turned on you already. She said she turned. Damn it. You can't go. You don't want to see Brad spill orange soda on the trophy and everything? I'm not going to be in the Los Angeles area.

Oh, man. That's bad. Can I send a proxy? Yeah, I think you should trophy and everything. I'm not going to be in the Los Angeles area. Oh, man. That's bad. Can I send a proxy? Yeah, you should send a proxy. Imitator? You should have to eat that terrible food. I should have to pay for the shakiest dinner because I didn't go. All right, Sunday.

That stinks. Miami at Pittsburgh. So all four Hope teams aren't winning because that never happens well let me show just it's funny you say that last year all four road teams won in the wild card round i don't ever remember all four home teams winning i'd have to do the i'll do the research before friday's podcast with uh lombardi in house but uh so somebody's gonna upset the cart. You think it could be this one? I mean, you can't even count that first game. I don't know.

Here's my question. A lot of people really like the Steelers team, and I don't see it. And I don't know whether I don't see it because they're on my corner with the Patriots or I don't know. I trust my instincts a little bit here. So Steelers have won. They were four and five and they finished 11 and five. They won seven straight. They lost to your team pretty convincingly.

You watched that game. Yeah. I didn't think they were in the ballpark with the Cowboys in that game. Since then, they beat the Browns. They beat that shitty Colts team. They beat the Giants, which was a nice win at home. That was evil Eli, though, that day. Right.

It was Eli just doing Eli things. He threw the pass. He was awful. They beat the Bills. They came back to beat the Bengals in a game that frustrated the hell out of both of us. I still don't know what the Bengals were doing the second half of that game. They beat the Ravens in week 16 in a game that if the guy doesn't get in the end zone and just gets tripped and falls on the two yard line, the Ravens win and the Steelers are fighting to get into the playoffs. And then they beat the Browns.

I don't see it. I get the Le'Veon Bell, Antonio Brown thing. As we've said many times, Roethlisberger, the ball to me doesn't look like it's coming out of his hand correctly. No way. I don't think their defense is very good. Pretty soft. Flacco had guys open that whole Ravens game. Shazier's great. They have a couple guys.

Mitchell's scary. He's a little TJ Ward-ish. But I think you can throw in that team. I think Miami can hang with them. So anyway, I had Steelers by, what did I say, nine and a half? You said nine. I said nine. I think the line's too high.

I actually think this should be like a six-point line. Well, that's what I went. I said six and a half. You said nine. It is nine and a half. Yeah, and that's like an extra field goal because it's the Steelers and it's Matt Moore. But I don't think they're going to bother Matt Moore.

Well, let me ask you this. They're not the kind of team that's going to be like, oh, my God, they've been in Matt Moore's face all day. That's not what the Steelers team is. But you used to do this playoff manifesto thing. I loved it. How many caveats does Matt Moore on the road violate for this playoff manifesto? Oh, a lot.

It's Matt Moore versus Roethlisberger. It's not great. I like Gase, though. And I think Ajay is good. I think Jarvis landry is good like i think miami is good yeah there's no guarantee that pittsburgh is going to stop this offense they have good cornerbacks they lucked out with this converted receiver that they put a cornerback he's been good uh sometimes there's an angry team that stuff like i said seven of these eight teams have not been hot at all uh sometimes somebody steps up and pittsburgh lost to

miami in a brutal game i don't know what how they remember it was shocking that they lost um maybe maybe they just explode that's the other thing so now the case against miami other than matt moore is um all-time cream puff schedule. The same schedule. All of their wins were... I think the Steelers were the only good win they had. They beat the Cardinals by three. They beat the Bill. That's a tough... That's the only thing I say.

They went to Buffalo and won that game. But I'm just looking at who they beat. They only beat one team that finished 500 or above, and it was the Steelers that's what's wrong with these playoff teams this this first weekend we we have in the back of our mind or maybe not even so far back four games that we've seen all these teams play that were stinker absolute stink bombs like the Ravens slaughtered the Dolphins and that was like four weeks ago that wasn't that long ago right Steelers looked terrible against so many, even teams that they beat two weeks ago.

My only point is, I don't think the Steelers should be favored by that many points in a home playoff game against really anybody, unless it was like Matt McGloin or somebody like that. They've only, they killed the Chiefs in week four. They beat the Jets by 18. They beat the Browns by 15.

The Colts by 21. The Giants by 10. Those were their only double-figure wins. Giants was a good win. Giants was a good win. That was their best win. But again, it was evil Eli. It was one of those Eli games that you knew pretty much right away.

You just expect that Roethlisberger's in sync with Antonio Brown at this point in the year and he's not like that he waited the whole ravens game for it to happen you know it's just like rogers is coming out he has that eli rogers rogers has been pretty good bell is frightening sure yeah sue's gonna do stuff i think we'll be able to tell right away sue scared me about five minutes left something he got into with blunt oh yeah and uh blunt like ripped his face mask and it was a whole thing but they kept both of them in i'm like oh my god sue's gonna take out like edelman that's it like if there's no scarier angry guy than sue yeah right i was like he's just gonna break somebody's leg but i think because they were about to make the playoffs he didn't want to get suspended five minutes left in the season you're right if their season was over i

think he would have just taken out seven and eight they're 7-8, it's a different story. How about Aqib Tlaib ripping Crabtree's chain off during the game? That was unbelievable. It was like petty crimes going on in the middle of games. Aqib Tlaib, it's unbelievable

that he's been able to continue to stay in the field and have an NFL career. He shot himself. Right. He really seems like the sketchiest guy

in the league. Patriots are going to somehow sign him sometime this week. He was good for us except malcolm floyd scored for you oh michael floyd michael floyd rather yeah yeah i'm a little conflicted about that yeah did you see the video the video what the guy was asleep at an intersection he was so drunk he was like actually asleep no really cops like banging on his window wow and michael floyd's like not waking up for like 45 seconds and the cops like can you please wake up can you please get out of the car like that's how drunk he was right

and then he wasn't honest with the colts about it so they wait are the cardinals so they waved them but then you you know all the stuff was like what a good teammate he is all these guys in the cardinals vouch for him. Came to the Pats. He's been working his ass off. Yeah. And to be honest, we've never had a receiver quite like him. What do you care?

He's a drunk. So you have friends with 50 drunks. That's true. That's how I rationalized it. But yeah, he's this big physical. Right. The only guy we've ever kind of had like him was David Givens during the Brady era. Just a big big but he's

he's more physical than givens was we made brady's never really had somebody like this you had lafell but he didn't pan he wasn't physical like this guy no no all right so you like it sounds like you like the steelers you're gonna put them in a parlay i'm not saying anything i i'm okay i i kind of do i kind of do right now just probably to win but giants at green bay giants at green bay before we do this last one hit water you know you should drink eight glasses of water a day did you know that i did know that is that true yeah you should water is really good for you most people don't drink eight waters eight glasses of water a day because it's bland and they want something

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game. It really is. I'm really excited for this game. Giants Packers. Whoever I root for, I know I'm going to get screwed here on the Cowboys end. Who do you root for? Do you get the Giants out of there if you're a Cowboy fan? Yeah, he want the Giants out. You want Rodgers coming to Dallas?

Yeah. Because the Giants-Cowboys is probably, my friends and I were talking about, it's probably a 21-17 game no matter what. You get the Giants out. Maybe the Cowboys could score. Take the Giants out. Really?

Yeah. Okay. Actually, what you should do is you should be rooting for the Lions. Well, I know. But the problem with having to buy is whoever you play is kind of hot. They're coming off a win. They have momentum. So if the Lions went to Seattle and won, I don't know.

As much as I don't like that Lions team, I don't trust the Seahawks at all. And I could see like a 10-3, they're up, and you could talk yourself into it pretty fast. Right. But this one is, I don't know. I mean, you say Green Bay, sure. They've done great things to get to the playoffs. They're the only one of the eight teams that's hot,

but those corners are so banged up now. The Packers three and a half was my pick. I said six. And it opened at seven and a half, and it's now four. So you win. Wow. You win the week. Why would it open at seven and a half?

The giant money came pouring in. I think the Giants are legitimately good. They're built for Lambeau seven degrees. I think they're more built for Lambeau seven degrees than the Packers are. I'm excited for this game. That's a great game. It's going to be really good. So quickly on the Packers and everybody raving about how hot they are.

I just want to point out who they beat. Because they did lose to the Titans by 22. Well, you can't do this for every team and say nobody ever beat anyone good. There's got to be somebody good. All I'm saying is I keep hearing about how red hot the Packers are. They beat the Eagles. They beat the Texans. They killed the Seahawks.

They barely beat the Bears. They beat the Vikings. They beat the Lions. Congratulations. You have one win that I respect out of those six. They killed the Seahawks. They barely beat the Bears. They beat the Vikings. They beat the Lions. Congratulations. Well, they beat... You have one win that I respect out of those six. But they're the Packers. They're a December team.

They won all the games they were supposed to at the end. That's fine. But they were 10-6. And now their secondary is really banged up. I didn't feel they lucked out in winning any of those last games. I don't think they lucked out either. I think the Bears was a little lucky. They blew that game.

It should have at least gone overtime. I don't know. I don't think the Packers. I think Rodgers is really good. Then they can throw the ball. But I think this Giants team is really good. I think that line should be three. It's going to be fun.

Let's not forget, the Giants were awful two Thursdays ago against Philly. Well, evil Eli is always lurking. The other thing with the Giants is that, and it's weird because it's only happened twice, but Eli has gone into Lambeau and won in cold weather twice. I think he's 2-0 there. Do you feel any team has a coaching advantage seattle's first eight seattle's like the only one right now right i mean if you could say

seattle even pete carroll as long as something stupid doesn't happen they were pretty there i think their offensive play calling was really goofy this year. I have no idea why they don't use Jimmy Graham more. Right. When I watch them, I'm like, I was saying to Danny Kelly yesterday, I think they should use Jimmy Graham like the Pats used to use Hernandez, like as an H-back and move him around, and he's always in a different spot. When he's on and when they find him, they seem unstoppable. They seem unstoppable.

Yeah. I don't get it. I don't think there's a huge coaching advantage the last thing I wanted to go over with you does everyone in LA have a coffee? I think so Super Bowl odds

oh yeah I forgot to print these so the Pats are plus 180 which is basically you know round two two, they're going to win. So are they even to win the AFC or a little less? Are they like minus 120 or something? Yeah, something like that.

Maybe that's the bet. No, I think their odds are better than that. There might be like minus 200. We can look this up. It's got to be, yeah. Your computer's dead to be. Yeah. So. Computer's dead. Your,

your computer died. So the Pats plus one 80 Falcons plus nine 50 and the chiefs 10 to one, I think are the three best Superbowl bets. And I, I wouldn't recommend any of them cause I don't think the odds are good enough, but I think the chiefs 10 to1 is a really good bet because they win round two.

They probably have the Steelers coming to them. They'd have to go into New England and then they'd have to win the Super Bowl. So the odds aren't even that good. But I think those odds are better than the Steelers at 9-1. The Steelers have to go to Kansas City and beat Kansas City. I don't understand why their odds are worse than

Kansas City's. I love the Chiefs. But don't understand why their odds are worse than Kansas City's. I love the Chiefs. But don't you wish those odds were like 18-1 and not 10-1? Yeah. I think people know that. So then the Falcons are plus 950, Packers plus 950. Your team's plus 375, which seems about right. For the whole thing?

Yeah. Giants are 18-1. Steelers 9-1, which is ludicrous. And then the Seahawks are 14-1. So, okay, you're right. The Patriots are minus 200 for the AFC. Right. So, let's say they're going to win that first game. So you're basically

just betting round three minus 200. So what would there be at round three? If they're home against They'll be like six seven point favorites. Worst case scenario against Pittsburgh, they'll be six seven. Kansas City? I think it's going to be the Chiefs. So they'll be like minus 300. Yeah, I guess they get you. It's the same way.

I think go heavy on the Pats to win the AFC and then have some money on the Chiefs to win the Super Bowl. And then when the Chiefs lose in the Super Bowl, it'll be hilarious. I think Vegas has completely figured out these future bets. Really? And they made it so that there's no value whatsoever. The best value I saw was the NFC is now 3.5 in the Super Bowl. Plus 3.5?

Yeah. What's Atlanta? Did you say they win the Super Bowl? They're plus 950. So that means- Those odds aren't even that good. So are they 4 or 5 to 1 to win the NFC? I can look. No, they're going to be-

4 to 1? I can look. No, they're going to be... They're going to be plus 340. That doesn't make a lot of sense. So they'd be home for Seattle. So maybe those are their best odds. That's not bad. Because basically, they're guaranteed to be... I don't think anyone stops that offense,

and they don't have to go cold weather. That's not bad. So do you want to go cold weather. Don't a place. No, that's not bad. So do you want to make that or Don Julio shot of the week? Or do you want to do it? You don't want to do Oscars. I don't know.

Okay. I haven't announced the Oscars yet. All right. We'll do Oscars next. Nothing against my beloved Cowboys, but I think Atlanta, I think that's the best value, NFC, plus 340. And let me just say this.

Good job, Tony Romo, yesterday. Oh, yeah. You know? I think if that game, people say it's meaningless, I think it proves something. If you want two field goals and two and a half quarters, Mark Sanchez is your guy. If you want one field goal for four drives, Dak Prescott's your guy.

If you want to score every drive, touchdown. Tony Romo. You're still in the Romo camp. Antonio Romero Romo. That's your man. I love it. I thought he looked great. 134.4 passer rating. His arm looked great. His arm strength was everything you'd want.

That guy next year is going to go to Denver or Houston or wherever the hell he goes, and he'll be one of the seven best quarterbacks in the league. Do you think he should go? Do you think he should retire or go? No, I think he should go's going to go to Denver or Houston or wherever the hell it goes, and he'll be one of the seven best quarterbacks in the league. Do you think he should go? Do you think he should retire or go? No, I think he should go to a team that's relatively close. You think he should? I think he would have helped Denver.

Denver or Houston. I think those are the two. Denver or Houston. There was one more. I thought maybe Arizona, but that offensive line's not great. Not great for him. He wouldn't want to be able to win a division in one year. What about the Chargers if Phil Rivers retires?

I feel like Phil Rivers could retire if they moved to LA. He's got eight kids. That could be fun. Imagine moving eight kids. Yeah. Or try to live in San Diego and commute to LA every day, which he probably would do, or get a helicopter or something. You have eight kids. You never want to retire.

If I had eight kids, I wouldn't even live in the country. I wouldn't even live with any of them. I'd be living 3,000 miles away. You can't even skip a soccer game. What are you kidding me? I know. I only have two kids. So our Don Julio shot of the week.

We like the Falcons plus 340 to win the NFC as the best odds. Don Julio, the world's original handcrafted tequila with multiple unique tequilas, including Don Julio 1942, the best luxury tequila you'll ever drink. And Diageo's Dan Sanborn loves the shot of the week. He's the best. He really enjoys it. I'll tell you what's not the best.

Cousin style shirt thing. Winless last two weeks, but I'm going to get it back. You heard the confidence in my voice this last hour. I'm going to get it with these games. We're going to do it. Have you gotten any death threats or anything? Lots of them. I can't even look.

I can't even. Thank God these are free. Thank God these are free, yeah. You know, I think I need to do what Apollo Creed and Duke did for Rocky. I need to bring you back to one of the downtown LA gyms. Oh, interesting. Get your roots back. Right.

Why don't you look around and be like, you see the hunger? You see the hunger in those eyes, Rock? You haven't had that for some time. I like that. Yeah. If my wife gave a shit about anything I did, she'd take me to the beach and scream at me like Adrian.

She did. No, she doesn't care. That was Adrian's only great moment. It was really good. She was, for the most part, really a wet blanket and a horrible wife yeah uh and not supportive at all but in rocky three she was supportive for about an hour why you're human aren't you what do we need we got buddy we got

cars what are you afraid of oh man i'm afraid too uh all right jimmy kim alive bachelor special tonight check it out joel McHale is a guest and Nick Vial. What's his name? Nick Vial. Vial, right? Yeah. The Bachelor himself

at The Cousin Sal on Twitter. All that good stuff. And on Channel 33, Julia Lipman is bringing back Bachelor Party, her podcast for The Bachelor season. She's fun. And there's going to be

some great guests, including my wife. Oh, nice. There's a lot of rumors about a Dave Jacoby comeback for one podcast, which has everyone in a tizzy. I might go on there once, but yeah, Bachelor Party, definitely check that out. Check out theringer.com. Don't forget about the Channel 33 podcast, the Sports Movie Hall of Fame podcast, which has been really fun to do so far. And also I have a new column coming up at some point this week. Thanks

to SeatGeek. Thanks to everybody. And we'll be back on the BS podcast later this week. Good job, I.M. Good job, I.M. I don't have