The Bill Simmons Podcast - Ep. 29: Thanksgiving/Week 12 NFL w/ Cousin Sal

Episode Date: November 23, 2015

HBO's Bill Simmons talks to Cousin Sal about the Cowboys' mini-resurgence (2:06 mark), worst NFL teams (8:12), Thanksgiving games (18:40), Cam for MVP (22:21), handsome QBs (29:47), are we sure Matt Ryan's good?(34:01), crossed-off NFL teams (42:00), Peyton Manning's demise (54:25, Cotto-Canelo (1:00:15) and WWE Survivor Series (1:07:15). Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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the best way to protect your home without writing huge checks or signing long-term contracts with no way out. I mean, seriously, why wouldn't you want a home security system that gives you 24 7 protection for just 14.99 per month that's less than half what most companies charge visit simply safe bill.com and get an exclusive offer for 10 off finally a home security system you can trust again that's simply safe bill.com The Cuz. Yes. For the first time in 2015, we are doing

a BS podcast after a Cowboys win. Congratulations! Unbelievable. Yes, we missed the first two because we didn't do it in September and yeah, it doesn't feel right. Doesn't feel like I should be here. Is there anything else you could be sad about? Because normally you're in a Monday fog slash sadness slash haze slash whatever.

Now you seem uplifted. I did all right with my bets, and Romo's back. And I would say even a below average performance for him, and still a double-digit win on the road. That's pretty good. He looked icy in the first half. He looked a little rusty. Didn't really matter.

Well, listen, we were suspended last year for the first three or four times we were suspended last year. We came back. We were rusty, right? We were calling Reggie Cobb, Randall Cobb and back. I'm still doing that. That's not fair. Yeah.

Yeah. But you're having ideas. If you beat the Panthers, you're four and seven. We'll have to talk about that you get to play the panthers on on thursday they have four days rest right you can't ask for a better time to play them right and we're at green bay otherwise we we should you know we should take care of business but we do have to win one or both of those games for sure you could get to nine and seven you scoffed at this last week yeah i still think there's a

loss in there somewhere but the giants tyron smith had his worst game of the year uh and we still we still like i said one by double digits the defense didn't give up any points in the fourth quarter it is it is exciting to have a full team back yesterday was actually a very interesting football day and and i enjoyed it from beginning to end which i can't say i did most of the time but there were good games all the early games we had a couple late enders that were fun green bed minnesota was an old school rogers performance that was that right you know for weeks i'd been waiting for him to be rogers and i'd been waiting for minnesota to turn into a pumpkin and then it happened and of course I had picked Minnesota. And thankfully not actually wagered money on them.

But you could kind of feel it. The last two minutes of the first half was when the game flipped. Bridgewater gets hurt. Rodgers comes down, gets the go-ahead touchdown. They had that play where it seemed like there was going to be a holding penalty, then all of a sudden it was offsetting penalties, and of a sudden they're throwing touchdown james jones is starting to really bother me you don't like i just don't understand how he's always open he's got a hoodie on can't somebody just yank him from the hoodie on in this day and age you get you get

fined for uh putting rip when your mother dies a day before he just gets to wear a hoodie he's rocky rocky three what happens when somebody tackles him from behind with the hoodie and basically decapitates him? Right, I know. Do they ban the hoodies? I keep thinking it's dreadlocks. Every time I look up, I'm like, what? He grew this hoodie dreadlocks?

Just over the week, he grew these dreadlocks. This is insane. But, you know, James Jones, Dayton Jones on defense, that defense was rock solid for Green Bay. It really just shows like it's like, okay, it's cold. We're gonna turn it on. Eddie Lacy. So what? He's 75 pounds overweight. He's gonna go out there. He's gonna run tough.

He's so fat. They had a slow motion at some point and his stomach was jiggling. He should just embrace it. He's Jerome Bennett at this point. It's like watching Refrigerator Perry. Call him the refrigerator. I was derisively calling him fat eddie during the game which i think should catch on fat eddie fat eddie lacy

yeah because we we did that with uh our dog olivia we just called her fat olivia and then when she we actually my wife actually started it started her feelings what did she tweet she tweeted that it was hurting her feelings or no, Olivia didn't tweet that. My wife was mad. She was like, don't call her Fat Olivia. She knows. It's like the dog's got an IQ of 10. There's no way she knows.

There's a lot of therapy involved. So she changed her diet and Olivia lost five pounds. Now we call her Not-So for Not-So Fat Olivia. I like that. So for Eddie Lacey, I think if we call him Fat Eddie right now, but then he loses the weight this summer. Call him Not-So Fat Eddie. Oh, that. So for Eddie Lacy, I think if we call him Fat Eddie right now, but then he loses the weight this summer, call him not so Fat Eddie. Oh, that's pretty good. Yeah. And then he beats the Patriots

in the Super Bowl, and you're like, oh, what have I done here? I just changed the whole system. I'm not that worried about the Packers. I gotta be honest. I think this is what we should have worried about. This is really, this is the time of year they heat up in the cold, and they're just they just showed, like, we're just tougher than everybody.

That's it. Not the Patriots, I'm saying, but the NFC. They're going to rise right there, and they're now competing for a bye. Rodgers, that was the best player on the field game yesterday, which I think happens from time to time. And Peterson had to be better than Rodgers was in that game. And Rodgers was just better. He made seven awesome plays that only three quarterbacks can make.

Peterson wasn't that great. Had a really big fumble at one point. I don't think there was ever a moment where we were like, oh my God, Adrian Peterson. Well, Lacey outrushed him 3-1. And I think you have to get to that point playing the Vikings where the Peterson 70-yard run is not going to hurt you. And the Packers always kind of kept that distance.

They refused to let it happen. Bridgewater, he's not terrible. He can do a couple things. He's okay. He made some good throws. He was under siege a lot, yeah. Yeah, I don't love him. I don't feel like when you shut down Peterson like that, that Bridgewater could be like,

all right, guys, I'm going to throw for 350 in three TDs. I got this. He's not there yet. He might get there a year from now. But once they fell behind, I just didn't think they were going to win. Did you? When they were down like 10, it was like, oh, man, they're not coming back from that.

I almost knew right away. Even in the second quarter, I thought this was a Packers game. The important thing, though, is Cordero Peterson showed Mason Crosby. Patterson. Cordero Patterson. Yeah. God.

Cordero Patterson, he showed Mason Crosby. Yeah, he did. I don't care about the 15-yard penalty. He proved his point. That was smart. His point was,

don't look at me after I just had a great run or I'm going to come over and headbutt you. Exactly. I don't know. I'm going to defend him there. We'll never do that again.

Yeah. Major Crosby might have been the best player on the field yesterday. He's pretty good. The other, there's some really fun things that happened yesterday and then some disturbing things and then just some inexplicable things. One of which was Case Keenum just got, basically was in as bad a shape as the guys in the undercard in the canelo koto fight the guy who just had to be carried to his corner right he his his lineman's trying to pull him up and it's like he's a dead body who just got fished out of the lake yeah he staggers to his feet and

they kept him in and the nfl's made all this big deal the last couple weeks about these guys in the stands with binoculars these spotters I know people have written about it but in the moment he was clearly concussed Nick Foles is already warming up on the sidelines right and then Case Keenum kept playing that was amazing I think Jeff Fisher was more way more concussed than Case Keenum at that point. I don't understand. First of all, the last two minutes of these Ravens games, it's intense. It's like the wire season three. What are you going to see? It's something cringeworthy you're going to come across. And so, all right, the Rams, I think they were up 13-3 or 16-3.

No, 13-3 and pretty late. And then the Ravens tie it. Fourth and five from their own 45, a minute left, it's tied. They go for it with Case Keenum under these circumstances. A concussed Case Keenum. A concussed Case Keenum. Your best case is that the Rams defense somehow wins this game for you. Zerline, who used to be good, missed a field goal.

I don't understand why they went for it, and of course they didn't make it. And then the Ravens and Joe Flacco, that might have been the best quarterback performance of all like leading them down you know he only needed him a first down but with the torn acl like not enough to set for that guy he never misses a game and now see i blame flacco you blame him for what because he knew he was hurt i think at that point he walks over the coach and says tell tucker to miss this i blew blew up my SEO. We should go for the first pick. I see.

But he didn't. He was selfish. He screwed up. Yeah, I mean, when it happened, it was clear something bad happened. And I was surprised they kept him on the field. They kept him in with no weapons. Like, who was it? They have Buck Allen and Kamir Aiken.

They're really, this is like, I'm going to do this. They lost Perriman, their first-round pick. They lost Steve Smith. Forsett broke his arm. Forsett goes out. Ray Rice is still out. I don't think we're going to see him either. Oh, we're not?

I'm sorry. And then Flacco, suddenly the worst team in the league. And that win was really bad for them. Because I think there's two two-win teams left. Tennessee and... Not San Francisco. Who is... San Diego.

Well, San Diego's not going to win again, I don't think. I apologize to you, too. I mean, you liked the Chiefs yesterday. I did. I liked the Chargers. And I said, they just can't keep losing every game at home. It's sort of a revenge game. The Chiefs locked them out of the playoffs week 17 last year.

And I apologize. They're just garbage. They just really are. They're too banged up. They have no home field advantage at all. And we were talking about it yesterday. It seems like that is now the most depressing home game in the league. Yeah.

Because there's always fans from the other team. The team's moving. You know, who do they have the rest of the way? They're going to have a game where they have maybe 100% fans from the other teams. It's one thing that I have. They have Broncos. Right, okay. Broncos week 12.

How many Bronco fans are at that game? Sure, a lot. 40,000? Yeah, but if you have the Bears coming to town or the Steelers, I understand those fans travel well. The Chiefs? The Chiefs. I saw the crowd. Someone sent me a screen grab. It's's all red it's a sea of red

did they fly the fans out there like what is going on now with the chargers organization it does seem like fans are just spread everywhere that was one of my big takeaways from last week or yesterday was you know we've talked about a home field advantage doesn't matter but you would have thought like all right minnesota green bay it's gonna matter for this these viking fans are gonna be crazy meanwhile there's like 25 000 packer fans right it just doesn't seem like it matters anymore and for every reason i thought that was going to be a good home field advantage it wasn't like yeah put them out in the cold and green bay old star winning and by the way you just said we talked about i've come i've come to realize it's impossible to have this hour-long discussion without saying we talked about it.

I'm sorry, Phil Simms. We owe you an apology. We could say we've discussed or we threw around. One thing I've noticed, this is a new thing that I've gotten excited about, is how they talk about how they met somebody the night before when he came to their meeting. It got me thinking if we met with Gambler, like somebody from Vegas, he came to our meeting for the podcast. And then we brought him up today

and we'd be like, wow, we talked to RJ Bell in our meeting last night. They're always very excited to tell us that there was a meeting and that this person passed through their lives briefly and they talked to him. I don't really ever understand the... Yeah, we arrange it. can we talk about talking about the greatest pay-per-view moment of all

time what was that and i missed it for a second but then it was sent to me like 25 times afterwards better than howard stern's butt bongo fiesta or when hogan slammed andre was when you were caught when you were acknowledged by the hbo cameras during the Alvarez fight. And no one was ever happier to be on camera. Do you remember this at all? I didn't know what to do. Yeah, no, I do. All of a sudden, there was this cameraman next to me in the aisle.

And they're like, we're going to show you. I'm like, okay. And then they show you. And it's like, all right, do I look at the camera? Do I look away? So apparently what you do is you look, you do like a thumbs up, and then you just turn. it's like all right do i look at the camera do i look away so apparently what you do is you look you do like a thumbs up and then you just turn is that what you do yeah but i didn't do that i just stared at the camera halfway most of the guys right i mean you're supposed to you're supposed to be annoyed that you're there

like you're you're that i think that's really happy to be there that's the cool way to do it like pretend you're in line at the dm. That's what the camera's on you. But that camera, I think, how long would you have smiled at the camera? Like I think well through the fight. I think if they kept it on. I didn't know what to do. I froze. They're reading the scorecards.

I think you're still smiling at the camera. It was probably four seconds and it felt like 140. I was just like, oh, please stop filming me, please. That was so good. So good. Yeah, we're going to talk about that when I get to, there's a specific point in the podcast I want to talk about that. But we should mention the Bills play the Patriots tonight.

And I think the line is seven. It's probably going to creep to seven and a half before the game. And I had a parlay. You did Alvarez, the Seahawks, and the Panthers. Money line, right. I did Alvarez, Seahawks, Patriots. And now I have to decide whether I want to try to hedge with Tyrod Taylor and Buffo and all this stuff. We do have our offensive line back for this game.

It's a tough one. Do you think it's going to be a close game? What do you think? I do. I picked it as my best bet on ESPN. So you think it's a to be a close game? What do you think? I do. I picked it as my best bet on ESPN. So you think it's a 3.4 point game? I thought they shortened the game, the Bills, and they run the ball, and they're doing all the right things right now.

And even better than all that, Rex Ryan is underplaying everything. He's almost giving the Patriots way more credit than they do. No, I know. Screw Rex Ryan. I know, but he's done stupid things in the past where it blows a game before it starts. If we win this at Denver Sunday night next week, Brock Osweiler wasn't terrible. I didn't think they really asked him to do anything. Right.

It's fine. He's playing Chicago. Chicago is missing their 17 best skill guys. Listen, this is how we have to get used to three backup quarterbacks won yesterday. We have to be like, yeah, he wasn't bad. He was good. So at Denver, home for Philly. At Houston, this is like week 14.

But at Houston now, not a gimme, because all of a sudden their defense is playing really well. And J.J. Watt's out of his mind again. A lot of like 10 points a game for the last three games. Yeah. So, you know. They're in okay shape. Home for Tennessee.

At Jets. At Miami. Well, those are the last two. I think that's where you run into trouble if you get by tonight. You're going to be favored in every one of those games. For sure. And then Carolina has... Hold on.

Carolina is... At Dallas Thursday. We're going to talk about that. We'll get to it. At New Orleans. Not an easy game. New Orleans is at least going to score points with them. Home for Atlanta.

They stink. At the Giants. That's a tough one. Week 15. Giants need it. New Orleans is at least going to score points with them. Home for Atlanta, they stink. At the Giants, that's a tough one. Week 15, Giants need it. Giants will definitely need it. At Atlanta, home for Tampa. I think Carolina's got a much tougher chance of going undefeated. They do have a tougher chance, but they're not getting respected by anybody. You know, they score 30 a game.

Yesterday they had 44. It's something else. Most of their games by double digits. I don't know why. I don't know why. Because they don't have any sexy players aside from Cam. You know, you have Ted Ginn Jr. and Funchess. And we talked to them.

Well, here we go. We talked about it. Yeah, but here's the thing. And this is why they're not getting respect. This is a fantasy football thing. Yeah. Because we've all had Ted Ginn Jr. And we've all had Jericho Cotcheri, and we've all had Jonathan Stewart.

Yeah. And we look at that offense, and you go, well, I've had those guys. Those guys suck. Right. But actually, they don't suck this year. Yeah. They're putting up points. And Greg Olson doesn't suck either.

He's never really sucked. But he was never like a gronk Jimmy Graham type tight end, who now is like basically the second best tight end, other than the Cincy guy. Eifert. Eifert. Eifert, Eifert. Yeah, I traded for him after week one. Just three passes and they're all touchdowns.

And he always gets just crunched. Dalton always puts him in a position to just get annihilated by somebody. That Cincy Arizona game quickly last night, Palmer sucked in the first quarter then they come back then it looks like they're gonna win by 20 and then they remembered oh wait a lot of people probably bet on us minus four and a half let's let's get really stupid here and settle for a field goal and then just let them drive down and get an easy touchdown and it's weird how our heads work they're up seven they're driving're driving. You're like, oh man, they're going to go up 10 and then give up a touchdown because

why play defense when you're up 10? They seem like a team that should score 45 points a game with that offense. They're so loaded. Took their foot off the gas. Andre Ellington can't even play for them. No. He can't play. Is Lou Rawls the best? I call him Lou. Is Lou Rawls the best

running back in the league now? That killed me. I played against him yesterday in fantasy. He had like 37 points. That's awful. Thomas Rawls. Come on. Is Thomas Rawls one of the five best running backs? I don't know what that was yesterday.

When you watch the games, it's like, who's this guy? This guy's amazing. Yeah, everything's like a seven-yard carrier. Yeah. If you told somebody who just got out of a coma nine months ago, they were like, who's that Thomas Rawls? I was like, oh, that was the number one pick in the draft. Right.

He's, he went to LSU. Yeah. He's amazing. They would believe that. This is why the Cowboys keep getting their backups. Uh, the Kristen Michael didn't work out,

but we have Turbin now and, uh, we're hoping you should add Lou Rawls. Thomas Rawls will be on the team. 2018. You might've got lightning in a bottle with McFadden. McFadden. Yeah.

Yeah. He always seems like he's going to be hurt after the play, which gets me nervous. It'll happen. But he probably this week. He ran out the clock yesterday. That was big. Well, let's talk. This is one of our favorite podcasts to do because we have the three Thursday games.

Three Thursday games. And your team is always involved and really single-handedly determines what your mood's going to be like on Thursday night. Sure. Along with the 15 pounds of food you eat. Yeah. Yeah. At least by Monday, I'm kind of over it after they lost.

But there are two very strange lines in the first games. First one is Philly at Detroit. What did you think here? I had no feel for this. Philly is the most confounding team of the year. I was fortunate enough to have picked against them yesterday. Smart. Just because Philly's reached a point where they just shouldn't be favored

by more than three points over any team in the league. Five, five and a half. But they also shouldn't be getting more than six points against any team in the league. Sanchez, sadly, I think it's over. Even I have to admit it. He beat us in a playoff game. I've been afraid of him for five years since.

But he's just not good at football. Yeah. I was surprised their defense was as bad as it is. So what happened? So they signed Kaepernick over the spring? Is that what it's going to be? They try to rejuvenate him for... And then if they don't chip kelly just goes back

to college or does he go back to college now um i think he could do both okay you know a lot of these games are played on saturday and then the pros are on sunday so wow that's a great idea yeah do both is there a school could he coach like temple he doesn't sleep bill he's he's constantly looking and scheming between two. Yeah. Coach's Temple and the Eagles. What other schools are in the Philly area? Villanova. Yeah, like a Div 3 school. Yeah. I think you could do it.

If anything can't do it, it's Chip. I had the Eagles by two and a half over the Lions and I can't explain it. Why? I had the... You win because it's Eagles by one. I had Lions by two. Why are the Eagles favored there? Four and six's Eagles by one. I had Lions by two. Why are the Eagles favored there? Four and six at three and seven.

I think the Lions are really bad. And it turns out the Raiders are really bad, too, because you watch Lions Raiders and the Lions are terrible and they're winning. The Lions are the only team to score 18 points in consecutive weeks and win both those games. And I think they uh hanging a banner at halftime on thanksgiving for that it's a really i mean these are numbers we've just never seen before 18 points silly silly all right caroline at dallas here we go yeah i had a line i had the panthers by two and a half all right i had the panthers by four, and it opened at Dallas minus one and is now a pick. So you get that one as well.

So, all right, let's talk about this. So three days rest for Carolina. Not good. Road game after three days rest. Must win for Dallas. Season's over if they lose. Carolina could probably afford to get rid of it. If they have some banged up guys, maybe just sit them this week.

That's all I can think of. It should be at least Carolina by two and a half. This is not. I think basically you're saying. Okay, what if Whedon was a quarterback here? Was Carolina be favored by eight or nine? Like Romo's worth like eight or nine points i think he is though i think he's worth eight or nine points why isn't it i just everyone says it's on the road

after three days isn't dallas also on the road they're they're traveling from a place they're playing in a place they weren't playing last week so you basically have three days to get to this other place and then play and in that sense it's I love that they make such a big deal about caring about player safety and all this stuff, and then they have these guys play two games in five days. It's completely idiotic. Yeah. Like, why not have the bye weeks before Thanksgiving? Yeah, they could do that.

That would have been the last bye week. They're so stupid. Yeah, but this is a 10-0 team that won by 17 touchdowns yesterday. It's not a fluky Carolina team. They should be favored here. That's dumb. I don't appreciate it, Vegas. You've made a great reverse jinx case against the Panthers.

I really appreciate it. All right, Chicago. One last thing. Cam has really been really, really fun to watch this year. Dynamite. Really great. You watch those highlights i was watching primetime less than i could sleep and uh just over and over again he's just making the

right play the ball's in the perfect spot for the guy to keep running with it when he catches it he's been out of his mind he does that ball or that thing where he slings the ball he slings it doesn't even look like he's stepping into it and yeah and the guy always catches it on the right uh right right before the uh out of bounds there it's i don't know it's spectacular i think the knock on him was that he gets a late start every time he had four touchdowns like midway through the second quarter i think yesterday he's good and the other thing with the mvp is you have to ask all alright if you put different quarterbacks in this guy's spot the whole season how would it have turned

out and I just don't think there's a lot of quarterbacks that could have dragged this team to 7-3 or 8-2 much less 10-0. It's definitely him versus Brady. I think it's probably a little too early to say who's ahead it's those two and then

it's everybody else and now it's going to play out. Let's see if Vegas has any say in this. The thing with Brady, though, is now you're moving Edelman and Gronk. He's had 20 different offensive line combinations. Yeah. But the schedule's been really easy. It's Brady, though. If you go that win-above-replacement thing, I think

it's Brady. Yeah, I don't think any other quarterback would go 10-0 with the team he's had. Newton, could Rodgers have done this in Carolina? I don't know. Maybe. Could he have done it in New England? Maybe. Chicago, speaking of Rodgers, at Green Bay,

this is the night game. I like the Thursday night game on Thanksgiving. Good night game. I went high on this because I watched that Broncos-Bears game pretty closely yesterday and the bears have just no skill guys at all and forte might be back for this the same but they're down 10 in the fourth quarter like it's over cutler's been really good this year i enjoyed cutler don't you get a good sense of him with the two minute drill like at the end i i figured for

sure he was gonna score or make it close i like, I have a good feeling about him driving this team 70 yards. I don't know why. They dominated that game. I think they were in the red zone at least five times. They just couldn't score in the red zone. We bet the Bears, and that line flew all over the place all week. It wasn't like Manning

was ever going to play right after we did last week's podcast, but Denver was favored by one, then Chicago was favored by one and a half. And then who didn't play? Jeffrey didn't play and Forte didn't play. And it went to two and we got it at two. And it ended up at two and a half. But we knew they were going to score and not get the two-point conversion, right?

Were you hoping that they would get the two-point? I was happy with the push. Yeah, I was. I was. The way that game played out,? I was happy with the push. Yeah, I was. I was. The way that game played out, I was like happy to grab the push and get out of there. Yeah. Because it just seemed like they were snake bit.

Right. They should have had 25 to 27 points in that game. They ended up with 16. They screwed up a lot there. What do you have for this line? I went high. I went Packers nine and a half. Yeah,

that's what I said. And it's nine. So we tie there. All right. Before we get to the sunday games yep um sal i know you have trouble finding shirts that look good untucked what yeah that's been one of the biggest problems of men's fashion for years not anymore untuckit.com solved that problem by making shirts that are specifically designed to be worn untucked. Long enough to comfortably cover the belt buckle, but short enough to keep a portion of the pant pocket exposed. Impeccable craftsmanship and attention to detail make Untuckit shirts the only choice for the untucked man. I'm an untucked man.

So visit Untuckit.com and learn why GQ called them, quote, perfection, unquote. You can even use the promo code BS15 for 15% off all your purchases. Untucked.com. Pretty good. I never tuck in my shirt. That's one of the reasons I love living in LA. You wear these. I don't like this about you.

You actually, the products you endorse on here, you actually wear them around the house. I'm not. You wear the Untucked. You do the, you probably, here, you actually wear them around the house. I'm not, you wear the untucked. You do the, you probably, I think you have the stamps thing. If you send me something, I'm wearing it. I'm wearing the MeUndies jacket pants right now. The MeUndies, like, I don't like that. So Sunday, normally Sunday Thanksgiving is usually a terrible Sunday football day and really an excuse to spend time with your family.

I know both of us don't ever take that excuse, but there are a couple good games on Sunday. There are, but the NFL screwed us again. I mean, here you have three, and there are no buys, I get it, but there are three Thursday games. You could not maybe have nine early Sunday games. Can you spread that out a little bit? Is that true? Yes.

So what is there, one late game? There's two late afternoon games. Oh, Jesus. Stupid. All right. New Orleans at Houston. I don't know what to make of this Houston team. J.J. Watt can't be

this good. He can't be the only reason that this team that that defense is that good. I have Texans by one. I don't feel good about it. Plowney's been playing well, too. Minus one. I said minus three. I hit this one exactly. don't feel good about it. Plowney's been playing well, too. Minus one. I said minus three. I hit this one exactly. Houston minus three over New Orleans.

Could this be the game where Drew Brees throws like five picks and there's stuff leaked that Sean Payton is going to the Raiders? Oh, interesting. This is when the Saints officially fall apart and Jay Glazer's on right before the game starts saying, Guys, I'm hearing that Sean Payton is looking at the Eagles if Chip Kelly leaves. I can see it.

One of those reports. This is when they start scrutinizing you after your bye, four and six, can't make a move. Sean Payton won't be the coach next year. And I don't know if Drew Brees is their quarterback next year. It's so strange. Where are these guys going? Imagine Brees and Kaepernick not starting next year.

He'll have to start. But let me ask you this. Is it possible an AFC South team gets a wild card? How is that possible? You're saying like if it's a 9-7 orgy? Well, who are you saying? Houston's 5-5. Colts are 5-5.

They play each other. They play bad teams the rest of the way. It could happen. You're going to look at – I mean, don't knock yourself out looking. You're penciling Pittsburgh in, right? Well, you're penciling the Chiefs in, right? I'm not penciling anyone in. Everyone likes the Chiefs, and they have an easier schedule.

But this is insane with the South. It was so bad. And now they're going to have, like, probably two 8-7 teams going into Week 17. I think the Chiefs can get to 10 wins. Yeah. At San Diego, home for Buffalo, at Oakland, home for San Diego, at Baltimore, Cleveland, Oakland. Yeah.

The Chiefs? Yeah. They don't have San Diego twice. Yo, you're reading yesterday's game. Oh, yeah, I'm reading yesterday's game. They have Oakland twice. They have San Diego and they have Cleveland. Yeah, Buffalo, at Oakland, San Diego, at Baltimore, yesterday's game. Oh, yeah, I'm reading yesterday's game. They have Oakland twice. They have San Diego and they have Cleveland. Yeah, Buffalo at Oakland, San Diego at Baltimore, Cleveland, Oakland.

Right. There's not a tough game in that whole stretch. I know, but they play the Bills this week, and what if they're 5-6? Then they're on the outside looking in. I agree. Look, ESPN stats. I know you love ESPN stats. 73% chance of making the playoffs, the Chiefs.

But watch this Texans team be around. Here's the other thing. KC and Pittsburgh, I like both of those teams more than whoever is getting the three and the four seed. Yeah. Brock Osweiler in a playoff game, we have a chance to bet on this? Right. I'm excited. Very great hair and great general look on that guy.

Brock? Yeah, one of the more handsome quarterbacks we've had in a while. Look at you. The handsome quarterback I always feel like has an advantage because that's a guy who, from high school on, has just been the handsome big man on campus

who's just getting any girl he wants. He's got a little swagger to him. Yeah. You know? You don't like that theory? Andrew Luck. Maybe not. You know, he's no fly balling.

Andrew Luck. Andrew Luck's. Is he? He's a good looking guy. I don't know. I don't know these things. No, but you're right. If the Chiefs went to Denver in their first round after having beaten them, that's Broncos by minus two and a half.

Two and a half, three, right? Yeah. And if the Chiefs are going to Indianapolis for round one, they might be favored. And same with Pittsburgh. With that said, it's Andy Reid, and he could blow any of those games in the worst way possible. And you know he will.

You know he'll blow one of those. He just will. It's in his blood. What a jerk. All right, St. Louis at Cincinnati. Should we officially pour one out for our Rams bet? Are you kidding me? Are you kidding me?

I don't even want to see what that is now. We got it at 20 to 1. You know what it is? It's DOA. But listen, I have something that I think we should do to make up for it. What is it? I don't want to chase the money we lost on the Rams bet. All right.

I still defend the Rams bet. 60 to 1 now. Well, it should be. We have LSU at 60-1. Yeah, we bet on Ben Simmons. Yeah, we bet on Ben Simmons. That's going to be about 10-1 after these two NIT games. I think that's a good thing.

It'll be between a 3 or 5 seed in the tournament. 60-1 would be good. I have a question. Go ahead. What are the Giants to win the NFC? I'm not doing that with you. 9-1. To win the NFC?

9-1. If you had to bet your life on. To win the NFC? 9-1. If you had to bet your life on a team winning the NFC, who would you bet on? Three teams better than them. Arizona, for sure. Giants can score, man. I don't know. I'm not even in this conversation. You're saying Giants at Arizona, NFC title game.

Arizona's six-point favorites, and you would just lay the six with Arizona. You'd be like, oh, I'm not afraid of the Giants at all. No, a little bit, but I don't think that's a good matchup for them. Like Giants, Packers, I think that's better. I love this Arizona team. I'm irrational about how much I love them. All right. They're going to make it a good Super Bowl against New England.

St. Louis at Cincinnati. Bring it on. St. Louis is going to be getting eight and a half points at Cincinnati. That's what I said. And it's nine. It started seven and a half. Even after since he lost, it went up a point and a half. You know what? One of the things that happened with the Rams is they haven't

had Robert Quinn for the last couple weeks. Right. And they lost Ogletree. I thought he did play two weeks ago. Or last week. No, he's missed at least the last two. I think he might have even missed the last couple weeks. Right. And they lost Ogletree. I thought he did play two weeks ago, or last week. No, he's missed at least the last two. I think he might have even missed the last three. All right. But I don't know if it's the same defense anymore. I think the defense, they had those first four weeks.

Whatever. They held the Ravens to three through most of the game. You know what it is? The Rams' destiny. I think I wrote this last year. They're the best ball team. Like in best ball, you play golf. Yeah, you have four good holes out of 18.

But if you're the guy who you're playing with somebody who's better, and all you really need to do is have like four birdies and you get to carry those four holes, and then the other guy you're with carries the rest, you're going to win a best ball tournament. The Rams are a best ball team. They play four great weeks a year. Where they go in, they go into Arizona and they beat Arizona.

It's like, oh, we're the Rams. And then they freaking blow the game next week to whoever. They need to score more, that's for sure. There's Todd Gurley. I mean, who's Offensive Rookie of the Year now? Is Winston number one now? I feel bad for Todd Gurley, though. I mean, he's Case Keenum's quarterback.

Yeah, yeah. I don't know. That's a tough race. tough race right now all right minnesota at atlanta i'm not giving up on minnesota yet i just think they had a bad game and had some dumb stuff happen i think the packers were fired up i think atlanta is atrocious all right uh minnesota minus one and a half over atlanta that's what i said i said my i said minnesota minus two. Atlanta's favored by two. So you're getting that. You were less atrocious. Hold on, Sal.

I have a new episode of Are We Sure They're Good? Oh, we're sure they're average. No. Matt Ryan. Yeah. Are we sure he's good? Are we sure Matt Ryan's good?

I think Matt Ryan's good. We're positive? I think he's good are we sure matt ryan's good i think we're positive i think he's good yeah really would you look would you want him as your qb for the next 10 years well how about in this game who would you want as your quarterback you want bridgewater i don't i'm not sure matt ryan's tate is matt ryan good that takes his head he says no all right that's it we're not talking about it's that good throws interceptions and is from his own end zone you're not good that was bad

that was terrible that changed the game and he is Julio Jones and he's Julio Jones as Tate points out and now Freeman who knows who's concussed

he left early yeah it's bad for them who's betting on them at this point that they're favored I think this swings during the week how many games in a row has Atlanta not covered?

Oh. One, two, three, four. Were they 5-0 or 6-0? Five, six. They haven't covered since week four. Yeah. When they killed Houston. How do you explain week four, Atlanta 48, Houston 21?

Right. And Houston now gives up 10 points a game. That was outrageous. Yeah, the Texans defense just woke up like two weeks ago. But that line, that Atlanta Colts line, like I wasn't taking Atlanta anyway, but it went from six, went down to three and a half yesterday. Like what happened?

Why did that? All that happened during the week is Hasselbeck got older. Like I don't understand why that line goes to three and a half, and they still don't cover. I don't understand it either. All right. Giants at Washington. It's a good game.

Would you rather have Cousins or Matt Ryan? I think Matt Ryan. Tate, would you rather have Cousins or Matt Ryan? Matt Ryan. Yeah, I think I would, too. Thank you. All right, so Kirk Cousins is the line for Matt Ryan. He hurdled that.

It's probably right or about right. Yeah. I have the Giants by three and a half. I like the Giants. Although I will say this is the type of game when the Giants fans are feeling good, they're feeling confident, Eli on the road, and then Eli just has a stink bomb and they're panicking in the fourth quarter because they're down 10. Yeah. We've seen that

that happens what twice three times a year for sure. Oh we're good now we got it we're going. Oh wait Eli what's Eli doing? Two weeks to prepare for this Coughlin and you saw some really encouraging tape yesterday on the Redskins and Vegas made it

Giants by two. So I guess I said three. Vegas is sniffing it out, man. That's too easy to take the Giants there, right? Yeah. They're, they're baiting us. Maybe they know Eli's going to suck in this game. Yeah.

Eli, if you're listening, don't suck in this game. I'm going to bet on you. No, no, suck. No, no, don't suck on you. I'm going to do a nine to one NFC bet and I'm betting on you in this game i'm gonna bet on you no no suck so no no don't suck on you i'm gonna do a nine to one nfc bet and i'm betting on you in this game that's crazy don't do the thing where you suck in this game eli i'm not letting you do that wait till superbowl 50 to suck four teams better than the giants easily you're not rational about the giants okay it's giant seattle it would be like if i was asking you do you think think Colbert's ratings are going to go up? You're like, no, he's never, no way.

I actually do. All right, Tampa Bay at Indy. Tampa Bay at Indy. It's a good game all of a sudden, I guess. Hasselbeck. Yeah, they're going to keep it going with them. Colts by two and a half. I said four, and it's three.

So you get it. You get that one. Buck's looking frisky lately. Although they did just have a guy fail a PED test and then claim it was an energy drink. Oh, right. Yeah, yeah. Kwan Chancellor. I believe him.

He said he's appealing it, but he didn't realize that this energy drink he was taking caused the positive test. Right. We don't know if the he was taking caused the positive test. Right. We don't know if the test was for testosterone or stimulants. I'm guessing testosterone because what kind of stimulants would be in an energy drink? I don't know, but that whole team was on it yesterday. They were on fire. You know what you have to do to fail a PD test for testosterone, right? What do you do?

Your testosterone has to be four times the normal level oh is that right in your body to fail a test there's no energy drink that puts you over that right so then if it wasn't testosterone then it was stimulants which means he was drinking an energy drink that basically had like amphetamines in it or something yeah my guess they have those those are good my point is so he comes out today it was like it was the energy drinks fault well tell us what the energy drink is because i want to make sure i don't drink it or my kids don't drink it can we find out what it is right can i get this in a 7-eleven like where what is this drink the fda needs to know about this yeah children are in jeopardy yeah where, where's Adam Schefter and Mike Florio with the name of the energy drink?

I got it. Yeah. Well, that's a tough one. But I think Tampa. And now they're 5-5. What's the wild card in the NFC? 7-3 Vikings. And 6-4 Atlanta.

Is that the wild card? Am I missing somebody? Eh. Tampa's a game changer. Seattle's getting a wild card. Seattle. Seattle's getting a wild card. Seattle. Minnesota's getting a wild card. They're five.

I'm just saying. Same record. I'm not getting excited about anyone else yet. Buffalo. Go ahead. Tampa Bay. So they're at Indy, home for Atlanta, home for New Orleans. In one of those three games, Jameis Winston's going to be absolutely atrocious.

Yeah. Because he's on a nice run right now, but his history in college suggests that he's going to have games or quarters where he just throws the ball up for grabs a couple times. It hasn't happened lately. I'm just red flagging it. I'm with you. At some point, he's going to

burn a group of gamblers here. He could be rookie of the year, but last week he dove and fumbled the ball at the goal line against the Cowboys. If it wasn't a dumb penalty, they'd be asking for his head. You might be right. Buffalo, Kansas City. Good game.

Good game or Buffalo might lose by 40 points tonight and then suddenly not that good of a game. I have Chiefs by five and a half. Oh, you went high, huh? Yeah. I said four, and it is four. Okay. I guess we'll learn more tonight. I guess we will.

We're going to learn something, all right? They've won four in a row by over 20. We're going to learn that Tom Brady is the man. Listen to you. You're confident.

I am confident. Belichick's not losing to Rex Ryan. Let me ask you this because you have the Patriots money line. Yeah. It might...

Put the bills on a three-team teaser plus 17. Nah. No the bills on a three-team teaser plus 17. Nah. No? Nah. No good? Here's the problem with doing anything like that. With Green Bay Thursday night and Cincinnati over St. Louis? It's so not fun

to have money against your team. I know. Because it's in the back of your head the whole time. I know. I'm going to ride the Pat's bet. Can I read you something? We got a tweet. This guy Nicky T at Nicky T T at Nicky T, T27. Bill Simmons, Cousin Sal, I went 0-3 in a three-team teaser. Washington, Philly, Minnesota. Is there a name for that?

The Corolla? I was going to say the Sal, but maybe like the disease tease or something? Who's the worst gambler that you know that we're friends with? Daniel's getting up there. Oh, let's call it the Kelson. All right, we'll call it the Kelson. He doesn't traditionally do teasers, but... Let's take a week to think about that.

All right, let's think about it, because I've definitely been in that position. Oakland at Tennessee. Poor Raiders fans. Such high hopes, right? Three weeks ago? And I almost started Derek Carr yesterday over Aaron Rodgers, and then the rosters froze before I actually had the decision to make to see what it looked like.

And there was like an 18-point difference. The lesson is don't bench Aaron Rodgers. Just don't. No, you can't. Just don't ever do it. I have the Titans laying one and a half points to the Raiders.

Wow. Yeah. I had the Raiders by two and a half and it's Raiders by two. Can we do cross-off teams quickly? Because this reminded me that we have to do cross-off teams. We can't put the Raiders in there yet.

Cleveland and Tennessee, two and eight, crossing them off. Good. Baltimore, San Francisco, Detroit, three and seven, crossing all of them off. Right. At four and six, Oakland, Miami, Rams, San Francisco, Detroit. Three and seven. Crossing all of them off.

Right. At four and six, Oakland, Miami, Rams, New Orleans, Tampa, Chicago. I'm crossing off Oakland, Miami, Rams, New Orleans. I think those are all cross-offs. When Chicago goes four and seven after Thanksgiving, they're in there, too. Yeah, I guess we could cross them off unless they somehow win on Thursday. So you're crossing Oakland off, huh? Crossing Oakland off. They suck. They could be five and six.

I'm so mad that I got talked into them. It's so funny how we give up on teams. Minnesota's great. Oakland's great. Well, I know. That's what we have to do. If you go back and you actually look at Oakland's wins, it makes a lot more sense. Right.

They beat the Ravens by four. They beat the Browns by seven. They beat the Chargers by eight. And they beat the Jets during the week when Fitzpatrick got hurt and Geno Smith came in, whatever happened in that game. Those are their four wins. Yeah. I thought they hung with some teams that they lost.

They hung with the Steelers. They lost a little bit. Hung with the Broncos a tiny bit. Yeah. Hung with they hung with some teams that they lost. They hung with the Steelers a little bit. Hung with the Broncos a tiny bit. Hung with the Bears but lost that. But I mean, it's not like they have a good win. And AFC South, you didn't cross off AFC South teams, right? No, the whole

AFC South is in play. No, I crossed off Tennessee because 2-8 I think is insurmountable. And they blew that Thursday game. I thought that was a weird, weird line. Jacksonville minus three and Tennessee to blow the the cover I mean just the fact that it wasn't a push they were up late in the fourth and uh just bad teams find the way this Indianapolis team they they snuck out that Broncos win and then really shouldn't have beat the Falcons that were I think they were down 14 to nothing in that game.

Hasselbeck looked like a 40-year-old guy. You told me. I forgot that they did that. Yeah, I guess they did beat the Falcons. They also snuck out the Jags in week three. Remember that one? Overtime? Right.

And then week two, they snuck out that Titans game. They have five wins, and those five wins are by two points, three points, seven points, three points, and three points. I'm not sold is my point. Well, let's just hope that, I mean, so who do we want to bet against? I guess it doesn't matter. As a four seed.

Guaranteed four seed, the AFC South winner, right? Oh, Blake Bortles. Isn't Blake Bortles the dream scenario? Yeah. That's going to be a disaster. The Jags with a four seed? So Jags, let's say, against the Steelers. Houston at least has a decent defense at JJY.

And Indianapolis will have a healthy look at that point. I guess it's Jags. It's got to be the Jags. Those receivers scare me a little bit. Hearns and Robinson when they're healthy. I don't know. But they do not look good Thursday. I'll tell's Jags. It's got to be the Jags. Those receivers scare me a little bit. Hearns and Robinson when they're healthy. I don't know. But they do not look good Thursday. I'll tell you one thing.

The Jags have played better than their Colts the last five, six weeks. Well, they're going to be five and six because they're home against San Diego. And I want you to just kick me as hard as you can in the nuts if I bet San Diego for the next four years at any point. I have the Jags by four and a half. kick me as hard as you can in the nuts if I bet San Diego for the next four years at any point. I have the Jags by four and a half over the Chargers. I probably went too low. No, you went high. I had three and it's four, so you get it. You're closer there.

Seven, three, six. Poor Phil Rivers. You're up by one. Him and Gates had words. They did, right? You know what? Whenever people have words, they always do the thing like,'re brothers brothers argue which I totally get yeah but I'm always waiting for the one time for they're like what happened there look Antonio's a dick everyone

on this team knows it he's been a dick for 10 years and sometimes he makes me mad but we're brothers can you imagine like if if your show if you had reporters after every show like when jimmy's snapping at somebody or something they have to talk about it after i like it listen i love jason shift he's been here for 12 years sometimes brothers argue uh these damn should we should we give a hearty shout out to uh new Jill Lederman. Oh, yeah, yeah. Jill Lederman, executive producer of Jimmy Kimmel Live. I want to bet. I bet 500 to 100 she'd name her son Rocket. Rocket.

Yeah. I like it. Rocket. I thought it was for sure going to be something over the top Jewish, but it was not. Rocket's not. Rocket Lee. It's just over the top. Rocket Lee.

After the Civil War general, Rocket E. Lee. I like it. Yeah. It's a good one. It's good. It's good. It's. Rocket Lee. After the Civil War general, Rocket E. Lee. I like it. Yeah. It's a good one. It's good. It's good for my character of the year rundown. The character of the year is going to be incredible this year. I might just say Jill Lederman, Rocket, dot, dot, dot.

Is the character of the year, is there any way anyone overtakes Corolla at this point? It's pretty much impossible, right? He's doing great. Corolla tried to tell me a story. He was drunk yesterday about how Mike August gets character points. You don't need to say he was drunk yesterday anymore with Carolla. I'm sorry. I apologize.

It's patronizing. But I may have to give him Cody points for how he told the story. It took him 40 minutes to tell a story about how August should get Cody points. It's weird. It's very strange. Listen, Carolla taking 40 minutes to tell a story is not breaking news. Let's go see Creed Friday, all of us, after Thanksgiving. I would love that.

I've already seen it, but I want to go see it again. Yeah. Oh, you jerk. Where'd you see it? Well, I have Michael B. Jordan on my podcast, so they sent me a screener. Oh, you son of a bitch. An iPad screener. I watched it on my iPad.

Oh, it's good. It's good? It's good. It's good. And I don't want to get carried away with Slash Stallone's performance because you know how I feel about the man. But I do think he can get nominated. I heard that from someone less crazy than you, even.

Yeah. Yeah, it's really affecting. crazy than you even yeah yeah it's really affecting really you leave it thinking like man i'm just glad slice the loan's been in my life for 40 years that was my takeaway from the movie and michael b jordan's really good the girl's good it's a good movie i'm looking past thanksgiving now i'm excited for that we should go again all right miami at the jets we have a lot of four and sixes versus five and fives why it's interesting i i read an abnormal amount of football articles the last 24 hours for research because i wasn't happy with my performance last week the dolphins seemed confident after that game even though they lost yesterday that they did some good things and they're still feeling they're still in the

playoff front it's like you guys are terrible they fell apart if you if you rush your quarterback he just throws it up for grabs how does miami feel good about anything and they have no home field advantage they have no what we call in the business identity bill are you gonna run the ball with lamar miller or are you gonna pass what what is your thing here landry your receiver for that i don't i don't know what what their deal i would uh i would give lam Lamar Miller the ball every time and do everything possible not to have Tannehill have to do anything with anybody running at him. Try something. Well, the Cowboys left him a minute in the second quarter, and he came down and scored. I said, oh, that's it.

Now we're going to fall apart. But he doesn't capitalize on momentum so much, Tannehill. It's like you could get your first quarter, Tannehill. It could be the same as your third quarter, even though they're driving. Yeah, you rooted against him yesterday. Once you hit that guy like three times, he folds. That was it. So that's one of the reasons I like the Jets this week,

because I think they can just blitz him and send dudes at him and get in his head. I have Jets by four and a half. You went too high. I said four, and it's three and a half. That's too low. And the Jets' defense might be the one thing that we're all wrong about. I mean, Revis got beat a lot yesterday. They're just, they're not lights out like they used to be.

I know from Little Birdies that the Patriots felt like they sold high on Revis. They did. Yeah. He secretly got torched in that Baltimore playoff game. Mm-hmm. And they really like Butler. I don't think they were too concerned. I guess that's all we needed to know.

The Patriots always make the right decisions. Yeah, just find me the guy who's come back to haunt them. Right. Doesn't really exist. They usually, when he cuts the cord, they usually don't look back you didn't think jonas gray was going to be a standout for dolphins but how have you not picked him up yet the one move move he made that i where he got too smart for himself i think was seymour

when they traded seymour for the first round pick but that turned out to be like the seventh pick in the draft yeah i'm trying when they him, it was, he had two really good all-pro years left in him when they traded him. Right. That was probably the one they didn't sell, but they got a great pick, so.

One move is not signing Pollard was the worst thing they did, I think. Yeah, but he would have hurt somebody in practice. That's true. You're right. Arizona,

one of the two late afternoon games, thank you NFL. Arizona at San Francisco, if this even counts as a game. Cards by 8.5. Yeah, you're going to get this. I don't know why I said

7, but it's 10.5. It opened at 9. Now 10.5. I have a confession to make. Go ahead. I don't think Blaine Gabbert's that bad. They showed a little fight in them. He's, compared to some of the other guys we're watching, like if you just switched him and Tannehill,

I don't think either team's different. Second quarter, they take the ball to the 10-yard line with a minute left, and they're running a play, and I'm like, what are they doing? Run this clock out against Seattle, and he almost gets sacked in the end zone, and then takes them down the field, and they score. Yeah. It yeah it's like wow they're kind of in this game but then I think there's about 15 different quarterbacks that are all right around each other from a talent

standpoint and he's on the higher end of those guys right and now does Kaepernick get shut down if he's playing well like his non-throwing shoulder well I think what happened is I think he got the surgery maybe i'm wrong but the way i read it then they put it no he elected to get the surgeon i think they weren't happy about it oh i see okay i think he was like f you guys i'm getting i'm getting my shoulder fixed so i can be ready for next year i want to find out what happened because they claim that three teams are niners claim that three teams approached them last week about trading him. I can't imagine what was offered. He's still on the

team. He's salvageable. You think so? Yeah, I think right coach, right system, moving him around, doing stuff. It can't be forgotten that he completely demolished Green Bay in that playoff game. For somebody who's allegedly washed

up at age 26, 27, I can't get that game out of my head. who's allegedly washed up at age 26 27 like i can't get that game out of my head right he's got to get another chance somewhere there's talk about like it's not even and i said there's talk about so that's different than we talked about but there's talk about that his head's not in the game like he might be a johnny manziel in terms of who knows if he wants to play football anymore yeah he's never been the same since we did our podcast. That's right. Pittsburgh at Seattle. All right, this is a good game.

This is a good late afternoon game. It's a good one. Yeah. I'm a little afraid of Pittsburgh. Of course. I always say this, but I'm always afraid of teams that can score with the Pats. Yeah. Round two, if they came in, we'd be laying nine and a half,

but I'd be nervous the whole time they'll have come off a win against Jacksonville or somebody bad Seahawks minus four over the Steelers do we split this? no you get it it's four and a half I said three and a half did you win the week here? yeah I have a

I'm going to parlay the Steelers along with the over 50 and a half of the times Collinsworth calls Roethlisberger Ben. This isn't an NBC game, is it? No. We talked to Ben. Isn't that an NBC game? No, it's a late afternoon.

There's no NBC game? No, your Patriots-Denver is next. That's NBC. Oh, they flexed it. That's why. Right, yeah. Oh, okay.'t. Oh, they flexed it. That's why. Right. Yeah. Oh,

okay. Yeah. What do you think of that line? Did it. Did it. Did it. Did it. Did it. Did it.

Did it. Did it. You love it. Yeah. Uh, you guys ever lost on Sunday night? Yes. The short answer is yes.

Pat's minus five in Denver. We split this. I said, I said six, it's five five in Denver. We split this. I said six. It's five and a half. Do you think Peyton Manning, should he hang it up? Or who are we to tell him when he should hang it up?

What if he just wants to keep playing football? I think it's both. I think he should hang it up and who the hell are we to tell him he should hang it up? If our podcast is are we to tell him he should hang it up? If our podcast is terrible 20 years from now, these Monday pods, we're like in our 60s talking about gambling lines and it's just terrible.

I'd want to hang on for that extra year. We would. Tate, you'll tell us when it gets bad, right? Tate, tell us. He's sleeping. Wake up. Tate will be leaking to Adam Schefter. Bill's podcast performance sucked yesterday because he had a strained vocal cord

it might need surgery I don't know I think Denver's right to start Osweiler and I don't even know if Peyton's back but it is getting nitpicky with these injuries it really is like the torn plantar fasciitis that's all it could be is torn it's little tears

all these guys are they all have seven injuries come on all these guys are hurt all the time Brady plays It's little tears. So if you say something's torn. They all have seven injuries. Come on. All these guys are hurt all the time. Brady plays with broken ribs one year. He never said anything. It's sad because he's not getting the Cal Ripken, the Mariano Rivera,

I'm going to go on tour and everywhere I go they're going to honor me kind of thing. It's like he can't do that without throwing three picks a game. So it's sad in that regard. We noticed, well, first of all, we joked about how he should have just played a half season like Clement style. And they actually probably should have done that. They should have played Brock Osweiler for the first eight weeks of the season and then just brought Manning in for week 10. But we noticed yesterday.

But they did win every game of those. I know, but you don't want to peak in september and october like they could have peaked later but we noticed yesterday that it does seem like the torch has been passed to jj watt from a commercial standpoint oh interesting yeah and there's that one commercial what is it papa john's tape manning and uh manning and jj water in commercial. It's a little bit of a torch pass. J.J. shines in that one. But I keep waiting for Manning to hit him over the head with a Papa John's box so he can keep his title.

Load the boot. But is J.J. Watt the guy now? Maybe. I don't know if a defensive player could do it, though. I just think in terms of kids watching and the fantasy perspective, J.J. Watt is undraftable and that's always going to hurt him

kind of thing. Yeah? Yeah, I think so. I like him. So who is it then? Don't tell me Russell Wilson. This little guy wears number nine in Dallas

named Tony Romo. He's 36, though. He's making crownies. Never played in a Super Bowl? What do you have to say? Is it Eli? Oh, no. No, no.

That's interesting. Rogers? Hold on, hold on. Discount double check? Omaha! I guess it is Rogers. It's Rogers, isn't it? Well, maybe it's your good-looking quarterback, Brock Osweiler. He's a very handsome fellow.

Handsome man, that Brock Osweiler. Easy on the eyes. I don't know. Maybe Andy Reid. Andy Reid. I'm Andy Reid for Sonic. All right, last one. Monday night. This is talk about hanging it up.

The Monday night franchise might be done. Baltimore, Cleveland. Ugh. The three-headed monster of shob buck allen and kamar aiken versus manziel isaiah crowell and travis benjamin the nfl really stuck it to espn with their schedule this season they really did really you got out because you knew this this game was i think i knew i think it might have been a response to certain things that happened. It was on the schedule. I have Browns

minus three over the Ravens. I thought it was a pick because my head was hurting trying to figure out a line for this, so I just said pick. And it's minus two, Cleveland. So Matt Schaub is starting for the Ravens. There are going to be no fantasy games won and lost in this game, right? Oh, I like where you went with that.

What is it? Maybe Justin Tucker you have as someone? Justin Tucker. The Browns tight end. Maybe a Travis Benjamin start for somebody who's got a bunch of injuries? Barnage. Yeah. Barnage, maybe?

It's rough. That's rough. That's incredible. They should flex this game. You know, you don't have to watch this game, Bill. There's a new show that actually streams on the Waze app. I didn't know about this. What is it?

It's called The Sextican. And it's Mario Lopez and Selma Hayek. And it's a remote city in Mexico. There's only two cell phones in the whole city. And they're kids. It's like Saved by the Bell, but they're kids. And they just sext each other back and forth. sexta kin the sexta kin yeah it's just on the ways app just on the ways app just the two of them back and forth as youngsters sexing it's

pretty good our friend brad told us about an actual show called the river or river oh yeah right he was all he was is gushing about it lovesves it But is against every other show That's on any platform I get mad because It's like you're never done with homework Getting dumped more and more shows on you I'm sad about Last Man on Earth Just kind of

Falling off a cliff What is going on They can't really keep it going They can't It actually it they can't right it actually probably should have just been a movie the more my son laughs at it i'm like my 10 year old i was like yeah this that's what this is this is like a beer commercial for 30 minutes yeah uh hey we have to do um one more mention one more thing good on saturday night hbo will re-air last weekend's fight

between Canelo Alvarez and Miguel Cotto. You can watch it after that on HBO Go, HBO Now. Scout Canelo to see if you should bet on him or Triple G when they finally have their super fight, because you know it's coming. You don't need cable or satellite to watch HBO anymore. Just download the HBO Now app and start your free one-month trial today. I went to that fight.

I was talking to my friend Brian. What do you think it would be? Minus 160? Triple G or higher? Higher. Higher? I met Triple G before the fight. Oh, you did?

It's always awkward to meet somebody when English isn't their first language. There's just so much pressure on the one-minute interaction. You got to carry it. You had a meeting and he came by or you met him. No, I actually just went over to his seat and talked to him. He was like in the fourth row watching it.

And I guarantee he left that fight going, I'm going to kill Canelo. Yeah. Because Kodo. He was rooting for Canelo more than even we were with the bet. Oh, I don't know if Canelo will fight him though. Really? Yeah, I don't know if Canelo will fight him though I don't know if that's happening But if it does Cotto

It was interesting being there And having no idea how I was being scored We were texting I had no idea I was worried Cotto was going to steal rounds Because he was a little more active Canelo only does the one punch, two punch That's it, he never throws flurries

Or series of punches or anything and uh but koto's just too old like his punches had no steam but the angles were there and i think that's what triple g must have saw as seen as he's watching canelo landed flush though he landed a few times koto's a tough bastard you know he landed it looked like he was 20 pounds heavier in person like it was one of those things where as soon as they took off their clothes and they were in there it was like oh my god yeah he's gonna kill this guy he gains like 18 pounds yeah weigh-ins yeah but um koto not six years ago i think probably beats him pre-margarita with freddie roach yeah i think roach has made a difference but they they handpicked they did a nice job hyping this fight.

It was good. It was very entertaining. It was one of those Canelo controlled the fight, but I never felt like he totally had the fight. And I had it eight rounds to four. Would you have it? Yeah, I think I had it eight, four. But, you know, there's always those first two.

There's a tie round in there. I was nervous. Yeah, there's like the throwaway round. It's like. Yeah, there's like the throwaway round. It's like round one, it's like, who won that round? I have no idea. 11 punches landed to nine. I thought it was one round, one good flurry exchange away from maybe a rematch.

You know what? Some of those fights are just close. Like, oh man, this is good. Well, Canelo, I guess, beat him decisively, so there's not going to be a rematch. But Cotto maybe could have stepped it up one or two rounds, and that would have been one. He ran out of gas around the eighth, ninth round,

where the way he was circling and moving, and it was kind of keeping a distance, but his legs just couldn't do it for the whole hour. Right. And once he kind of got sunk, that was it. Canelo could just kind of close in. Canelo, something's missing with him, and I don't know totally how to describe it,

but it's almost like he's like a robot boxer. He gets up for some of these fights somehow. Yeah, maybe that's part of it. It just feels like he's a robot, like he's one, two. Yeah. One, two, but there's no artistry to it. I think he's still depressed over mayweather i really do i wonder if he'll ever shake that but after watching koto yesterday like

yeah he was young yeah but after watching koto yesterday it made total sense why i mean mayweather's like yeah koto on acid pick you apart yeah but uh it's really easy to move around and hit him, which I think guaranteed Triple G was just rubbing his palms together. Like, oh, my God. So you think minus 250 or more? I think it would be minus 250. But it does seem like Alvarez generates action because he's popular. It's almost like how the Packers line gets skewed.

He should have been a 2-1 favorite in the Cotto fight. He ended up being a 3-1 favorite,ers line gets skewed. Yeah. He should have been a two-to-one favorite in the Cotto fight. He ended up being a three-to-one favorite, right? Yeah, right. Yeah. It bumped up by an extra hundred just because he's popular. Very popular with the Mexican community. Like the show The Sextican. Almost as big as The Sextican is on Waze.

Is The Sextican, can you binge watch it? Or is it just you have to wait each week? You know what it is? The best part is afterwards it's called it's actually even better than the Sextican. It's called Talking Sexting with Chris Hardwick. Yeah, he reviews the whole thing. That's also on the Waze app. I meant to tell you this. I'm not making

this up. An audience channel, whatever the DirecTV channel that is. Right, I know what you're talking about. So there's some boxing show that they have or it's like i'm sorry an mma show that uh it's it's like in year two or and the ad was on and it's like mma meets there's cd stuff going on so it's a lot of like somebody's screaming that you're gonna get me that money by monday that's a lot of that and this guy's berating some bald guy and the guy's like kind of overacting and pretending he's scared and i realized it was jeff ross oh yes that's right yeah he told us about that yeah yeah jeff ross was played this guy who was just being screamed at

and i was like so then i went on youtube and I went on this deep dive trying to find the trailer to send to you and Jimmy and I couldn't find it. But yeah, it was Jeff Ross. Oh, I know he loves it. In one of those, I'll get you the money! They're trying to break his hand or something. Is Nick Carter in there? I think Nick Carter roughs him up or something.

I think it's Nick Jonas is in this show. Oh, Nick Jonas. Yeah, Nick Jonas is in this show. One of the Nicks, yeah. It actually looked like a pretty good show. I was kind of upset that I wasn't watching it, but I was so excited. Anytime Jeff Ross is doing anything, I'm excited.

I'm not going to watch unless Brad yells at me for not watching. By the way, HBO should do a 24-7 on Mayweather, Rousey, and it's really just Mayweather just laughing the whole time. The four episodes. Just to think, like, weeks ago, everyone was like, oh, maybe she could be Floyd Mayweather just laughing the whole time before episodes just to think like weeks ago everyone was like oh maybe she could be Floyd Mayweather I don't know I don't know that well that was the about the nadir of sports talk arguments I know but there was some like people you would respect it would kind of like I don't know yeah if she got him at the right moment you

know do you think she broke her jaw in round one that's one of my favorite internet conspiracies that's what they're saying? Well, then it got debunked But nobody's seen her And the way her face swelled She got beat up bad with the fists Let's just say that I wouldn't be surprised

Did you watch Do you know about Survivor Series last night? I watched the last match And I Always tough when you win the title And then it just gets cruelly taken away they did the exact same thing to daniel bryan they just ran it back shane realman reigns wins right he celebrates confetti then shame it seamus comes out and well boom it's kind of like survivor

it's funny you say survivor series but when when it's 49 minutes past the hour and you're a tribal council you're like oh there's gonna be a tie because they're going to have to revote. Yeah. It was like 1040 Eastern time and Reigns had won the title and a ridiculous amount of confetti comes down. Yeah. Blinding like the 94 Rangers and the ticker tape parade didn't have this much confetti. Like, oh, something's going to happen here.

So what do you want to say? What happened? Well, Triple H comes out and it looks like they're reenacting the Daniel Bryan thing right but then Reigns

actually gets Triple H knocks him knocks him down allegedly out the spear but then Sheamus came running in

and drop kicked and then that didn't even work at first didn't totally work yeah but Sheamus is our new

WWE champion. That's it. There's never been a better illustration of how much trouble the WWE is in short term with talent. They've gotten ruined. They lost Seth Rollins. They lost Daniel Bryan. CM Punk left. Orton's hurt.

Orton's hurt. Cena's out. Now Cesaro's hurt. Oh, he is? Yeah, he got hurt. He's out six months. They just got demolished by injuries. Oh, that's hurt. Oh, he is? I didn't even know that. Yeah, he got hurt. He's out six months. He just got demolished by injuries. Oh, that's bad.

And I think the top heel right now is Kevin Owens. Kevin Owens. Yeah. See, I thought what they were going to do yesterday, I thought they were going to have Ambrose turn on Reigns. I like Ambrose. I think he has some mid-80s Piper potential as a heel. I agree.

I don't know why they won't turn him. And it looked like they did the thing where they were almost going to right at the end, but they didn't. But he's better as a heel. I agree. I don't know why they won't turn him. And it looked like they did the thing where they were almost going to right at the end, but they didn't. He's better as a heel. Do they have too many heels? I don't know. Or are they hurting for a heel? I don't know. There's a guy they have on Next called Finn Baylor

who I think they should bring up. He's ready? Yeah, they're like two or three stars short right now. But not by their fault. It just seems... And then Sting got hurt too. That was the other one. Oh, right. They thought Sting Undertaker was going to be like their WrestleMania match. Do you know I played high school

football with Dudley, Devon Dudley from the Dudley Brothers? No. Dudley boys? I swear to God. That's impossible. Devon Hughes. Yeah, he was a year younger than me. Really? Yeah. They look a little long in the tooth these days. Monster defensive line. What does that mean? We're old? I'm old?

No, the Dudley boys. It's just 20 years of doing their stuff. All right, plug some stuff. Jimmy Kimmel Live. Tonight is our Star Wars tribute show. Carrie Fisher, Harrison Ford, J.J. Abrams. Harrison Ford? Daisy Ridley, Adam Driver, and John Boyega, right?

That's how you say that? It's going to be fun. Sal, I have a prediction. I think the Star Wars movie is going to be big. You do? Yeah, I do. I think it's going to do well. I have a prediction. I think the Star Wars movie is going to be big. You do? Yeah, I do. I think it's going to do well. They should sell some toys or something.

Make some money off it. I think you don't feel it yet, but I think people are going to start talking about it soon. $50 million in pre-sale tickets. It's amazing. Just tickets. And people buying Christmas toys of characters they don't even know what they are right now. And we spent our entire childhood making fun of these kids. We did.

Yeah. And feeling superior to them. I still think we are. And now they fun of these kids we did yeah and feeling superior to them i still think we are now they've had more kids they've had their own kids that's true and they're all gonna go see this movie and now it's somehow cool right i think you're right i was never in on star wars i just never i just i was okay it was fine average yeah but we the kids in the school saw it like seven, eight times. I never understood those kids. I don't know how much fun we can make.

We just did ten minutes on wrestling, but I don't know how much. Oh, listen. I have my own terrible vices. I just never understood Star Wars. I was making fun of the Star Wars kids, and meanwhile I'm buying baseball and football and hockey cards and playing with them. We all have our own picadillas it became six and seven now Disney's saying

they might do one a year for the next few years it's gonna be a lot I will say the third Star Wars in the theater when Darth Vader became Luke's father and that whole thing don't ruin it quiet I didn't see that that was a great moment in the theater. It's like, oh my God. Whoa. That was big. That was a big one. Yeah. That was a good face turn, as we would say.

Yeah. I don't know. You hear it. I was just about to plug my sports center. My best bets are seven and three. I have the Bills as my best bet tonight. And there's a dog barking in the background. Take the dog tonight. That's a bad barking in the background. Take the dog tonight.

That's a bad sign, Bill Simmons. I don't know. The dog barking as you're about to do your Bill thing? Yes, as I'm picking the dog. I don't know. And follow me at TheCousinSal on Twitter. I would also encourage you to go on Sal's Twitter feed on Thursday in case this Cowboys game goes horribly wrong.

I always love the thought of you angrily tweeting during Cowboys game goes horribly wrong. I just, I always love the thought of you angrily tweeting during Cowboys games as you're surrounded by 25 family members and your wife who just repeatedly looking at you for help when you're just not helping. I'm holding the family hostage with a drumstick. And we make fun of that line. I say it's terrible,

but I know the Cowboys be up 10 points in the fourth quarter and something. Sean Lee will drop an interception or something. That'll be it. You do. You go into this little zone when there's too much going on, when your brain kind of locks and you just get this. It's a little like what happens to Ryan Tannehill, actually.

There's family and you have responsibilities with the wife, but the Cowboys are blowing a game and it's like you can literally see you short circuiting. I've heard that before. Yeah. Have you seen his wife, though? I don't think we should feel too bad for Ryan Tannehill. Who's wife? Remember?

Great wife. Yeah. Listen, don't think Brock Osweiler's not doing well ever right now. Happy Thanksgiving to Ryan Tannehill's wife. Let's just say it. Yeah. Thanks to SeatGeek, our presenting sponsor, that just launched a new platform called SeatGeek Marketplace.

It allows you to buy and sell event tickets. Learn more at SeatGeek.com slash BS. And thanks to Untuckit.com for finally solving one of the biggest problems in men's fashion, fashionable shirts that are specifically designed to be worn untucked. If you live in Manhattan, go to their store on 129 Prince Street in Soho.

And if you don't live in New York, go to Untuckit.com, use the promo code BS15 for 15% off all your purchases. And that's it. That's it. Play us a good job. Good job by you, Sam. Good job by you, Billy.