The Bill Simmons Podcast - Guess the Lines Divisional Weekend With Cousin Sal (Ep. 311)

Episode Date: January 8, 2018

HBO and The Ringer's Bill Simmons is joined by Cousin Sal to discuss the up-and-down wild-card weekend (5:00), the Falcons' big upset (10:00), Blake Bortles's unmatched badness (14:00), Cam Newton's comeback effort (18:00), Jon Gruden's goodbye (24:00), Titans-Pats (29:00), Falcons-Eagles (35:00), Jaguars-Steelers (39:00), Saints-Vikings (42:00), House's defense of taking the Chiefs moneyline (46:30), and another edition of "Parent Corner" (1:01:00). Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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And finally, SeatGeek is the best app for buying and selling tickets for sporting events, concerts, and more for $20 off your first SeatGeek purchase. On any game or sporting event, I hope the Rams fans use this on Saturday for their farewell playoff game. All you have to do is use promo code BS, download the SeatGeek app, or go right to SeatGeek.com. If you missed it, I put up a playoff gambling manifesto on Friday. I stand by everything I had in there. Unfortunately, it did not work in round one. We're going to talk about that and more with our old friend, Cousin Sal.

But first, Pearl Jam. Cousin Sal is here. Whoa. I somehow won money this weekend, even though I went 0-4 on my column. Sunday. You loaded up Sunday. I loaded up. I pyramid schemed after getting killed on Saturday. I got to be honest.

So I was 0-4. I would do every pick again. I have no regrets. Well So I was 0-4. I would do every pick again. I have no regrets. Well, I'll say this. I think the Rams minus six was a bad pick. Everything else, no matter what you had, you either got very lucky or very unlucky. Rams minus six was not going to win.

They came out flat. Their offense came out flat. This is weird. We made money on week 17 when the Rams sat everyone against the Niners. Maybe they shouldn't have sat everybody. At least the offense. They need to be a little bit in sync. They're kind of coming off a bye that way.

They were down 13-0 at one point. Can I have a counter to this though? Sure, go ahead. They stuffed them three and out twice in the beginning. The kick returner basically fumbled twice in a row and it flipped the game. You know, and yeah, that's their fault.

And there's a young team that's playoff inexperienced, all that stuff. The Falcons didn't make any mistakes. But goddamn, if the kick returner just always has to do is two fair catches. And I just think it would have been like a three nothing at halftime. Goff was starting to gain confidence.

Might have been closer. Brockers going out was big. His ear was hanging off his head, Matt Ryan. He almost thought maybe he doesn't come back. I had no idea. I knew he was good. I didn't know he was that important to the Rams. Very solid pressure.

Rams got going in the second half. They were still doing their weird red zone stuff, trying to keep the Rams in the game. I'm disappointed. They only had like three, how many yards did they have total? I wrote it down somewhere. I thought that. 364 and like a lot of it, most of the game was garbage time for them.

I wasn't impressed. I know they had a few drops and everything. Their defense is good. Yeah. Their defense, I thought, did a nice job. Deion Jones, Keanu Neal, those guys are all over the place. We don't give the Falcons defense enough credit. I believe in the Rams, and I think they just played a shit game at the worst possible time.

I still feel like that's a really talented team, and I was thinking afterwards about playoff experience. Did we underrate that? Should we have factored that in more? But there's been other examples of teams that had no playoff experience do really well. The first Wilson Seahawks team, you could have made the same case for that team.

And that team, I don't know. They played really well in that 2012. The first one? Yeah, I think it comes in. Sometimes it could just be too big a game, I guess. I don't know what it was. But that's why maybe the Rams offense should have played in week 17. The funny thing, we were joking in the Slack.

Al Michaels was really feisty during that game. Yeah. Like, really getting mad about the reviews. Kevin Clark's theory was that Al Michaels had dinner reservations at 9 o'clock and was getting pissed at the date. He was like, I thought I'd be back in Brentwood at 9. This is bullshit. Don't review this.

Al eats dinner at 4.30. We all know that. That's crazy. So, I mean, Gurley had 10 targets, I think, and caught for – I know he had over 100 yards rushing, but 10 targets had 10 yards receiving. That was a big part. That had to work for their offense. He never got going. Watkins the whole year always seemed like he was ready to explode

and just never did and was just MIA in that game. And then, you know, dropped a really big – they didn't drop it. It went right through his hands. They threw a bomb when they had the ball where if he had just caught it for a touchdown, they would have been down seven with, what, two-plus minutes left? Yeah, it was a big play.

Down seven, down – why did the Falcons not go for two there? They were up 26-13. They scored back at 25. Or 25-13. That was weird. Yeah, and then they kicked the extra point. That didn't haunt them. I've watched a lot of Falcons games this year,

and I did not think they had that performance in them. So I'm happy to admit I was wrong on that one, but I would still make that pick again. I think the Rams are really good. No, don't make it again. It's going to lose money again. Don't make it again. Goff threw 45 times. You don't need that. Chiefs-Titans,

I don't know what to say. They're up 18. Marietta throws a touchdown to himself. Anyone who has gambled for a long period of time just knows at that point they're going to cover. We should have bet them live at that point. If you're betting on a football game and the

quarterback throws a touchdown to himself and you have the other side, you're done. Not a good sign. Pack it in. We should have live bet at that point. I know. I know. We're done.

But I don't know. I mean, Lord knows we say this after every Andy Reid playoff game, but I don't know what the F they were doing in that game. And he's a top five coach. I don't know what they were doing. Let's remind everyone he's a top five coach who continues to blow these games late or continues. And he was calling the plays.

I think Tate pointed out he had the giant menu up in front, the Barney's Beanery menu in front of him. And that guy started calling plays. None of them were to Kareem Hunt, who had like five carries after the first quarter. I don't understand. On third and two, like twice in crucial situations, they don't give to Kareem Hunt. I don't understand. On third and two, like twice in crucial situations, they don't give to Kareem Hunt.

I don't know what some of these teams are doing. And also, when they did give it to him, it wasn't the kind of runs that he's great at. Right. And they weren't throwing him little quick screens. It was weird. They came out, and they clearly had their first 15 plays scripted, and they were all great.

Ty Rico was involved in all these ways. He dropped a few. Everything worked. Yeah. And then Kelsey goes out, and it was like they completely fell apart. It was like, oh, my God, Kelsey's out. What do we do? And they had no plan.

That would be, if I'm a Chiefs fan, losing that game the way they lost that game, the only one I can remember that was worse was that 45-44 Colts game when Charles got the concussion and they just everybody in the team started getting hurt it was such a bad uh game plan by tennessee they didn't throw at revis for like the whole first half and then the second half they were like oh it's the real revis he was washed up three years ago let's start going running everything to his side that guy is heist junior if Oh, my God. He should give all the... Forget about it.

He definitely should not cash into these Chiefs checks. I think he signed them late November. For him to jog on that third and ten, he could have got there. He could have pushed Henry out of bounds. That was atrocious. Atrocious play. I don't think there was a right or wrong pick with that game. No, that's what I mean.

It was a stupid game. That was lucky or unlucky. But I would say this. I think we had two top five franchise gut punch losses in six days between the Ravens and the Chiefs, right? Yeah. Well, at least the Ravens won a Super Bowl, though. Right, yeah. I'm just saying as far as those games, for them to occur six days apart, it's insane to lose in that manner for both of them.

You know, my friend Connor was there. He's a Chiefs fan. Oh. in that manner for both of them. You know, my friend Connor was there. He was a Chiefs fan. And he said when the Titans started coming back, he said there was a 2002 Fenway vibe in the stadium. Like you could feel the sphincter just tighten. And I think that's part of it. And I didn't even realize. I mean, we know not to bet on Andy Reid ever.

And somehow because it was the first game, I ended up doing like a Flyer 14 teaser on it just because how do you not have action in the first game? Right. But it's just incredible. Like, he's lost six straight home playoff games. I don't know if we'll ever see that again. No, that's really tough because you should be—

Six straight home playoff games. You should be a good, you know, two-to-one favorite in all of them. You're at least between minus three and a half and minus ten for all of those. For the Patriots, I was in a weird position because I had money in the Chiefs and I had picked the Chiefs. I just had money in them to win, and I had picked them in the column. But at some point you watch that game going wow this is so much better for the patriots if the titans win

this course of course because i don't know derrick henry gained steam as a win along but i don't think that chief's defense is is even it is a mediocre very strange thing how derrick henry plays possum for half a game and then just he does gain steam man he's big he's six three two fifty yeah he missed he was terrible for the first two and a half quarters of that game he's missing blocks um i thought he was good he was hitting the line and just falling down and stuff like that and then all of a sudden he gained steam well the one thing you don't have to worry about is nobody will ever in the craft, Belichick, Brady era throw a touchdown to himself against the Patriots. That kind of stuff just never, ever happens. So if they don't get that, they're just down 15.

You kick a field goal, right? Yeah. And then Malarkey helped them out. He went for two really early. Right, yeah. That was weird. All they needed was three points. Kareem Hunt touched the ball.

I've always talked about it. He touched the ball 11 times. But it was the way, the touches that he actually got, I didn't understand. It's bizarre. It's bizarre. How does it get? So three quarters, five carries. Three quarters, five carries.

And you really just need, I know Butker missed the field goal. You need three points to win that game in the second half. What did we say the Falcons were for Super Bowl odds? We should have hashed that one out more. I was looking today. It's 11-2 for Falcons-Patriots rematch. Because I think it was at least 17-1

or 18-1. Because it didn't even dawn on me that if they got by the Rams somehow, all of a sudden they're playing Nick Foles in round two. And then round three, they're playing Nick Foles in round two. Yeah. And then round three, they go to Minnesota, which they could close the dome, right?

Yeah. So that's good for them. If I'm Minnesota, I'm keeping the dome open. And if you were the Falcons, and I know some of these teams I'm about to mention are better than the Falcons, but if you could have told them before the playoffs, hey, your road is going to be Jared Goff, Nick Foles, and potentially Case Keenum. Those are the quarterbacks.

Yeah, you're going to take those. And then Blake Bortles in the Super Bowl. All Rams, right? Those first three? Oh, yeah, maybe, yeah. So then yesterday, we had the Jags and the Tees, which I had to sweat out. We said enough of this. We're taking the favorites and the Tees which I had to sweat out we said enough of this we're taking the favorites on the Tees

that was my favorite bet the whole weekend was Jags Saints I just felt like if I had to bet my life that was the Tees and I thought Jaguars minus 9 that was my favorite best bet of the weekend and had I known that the Bills were only going to score 3 points I would have put everything

every single thing I own I wouldn't have had gas money to come out here. I was going to say, like, that's the right pick. Yeah. The home team gave up three points. I don't care what the line is. You should cover that. And somehow they didn't cover it.

They had one drive. We go all over Blake all the time as being bad. Blake Tannick. But he was a special kind of bad yesterday in the first quarter and part of the second quarter. He looked like he was just playing football for the first time in that first half. He wasn't sure if he was a lefty or a righty.

He had three of the worst passes, three of the worst 10 passes in the history of the NFL playoffs. On screens, too. And somehow none of them were picked off. Like five-yard passes. Yeah, I don't know. What's he doing? The Bills were in a goal-line defense.

If you're playing Madden and you're just in the goal line defense, eventually you just get torched. Smart. And the Jacksonville just couldn't figure it out. I don't understand how they couldn't have sent tight ends over the middle. The Bills are basically like, Fournette's not getting four yards ever on a carry. So if you want to throw, go ahead. But it's not happening.

Yeah. And then when we're down 3-0, when the Bills are up 3-0, I'm like, oh, my God. They have the better quarterback. Is he, though? Tyra Taylor was terrible in that game. He's better. Better coach. I don't know if he's better.

He was terrible. Comparable defense. It was scary. And meanwhile, it's all Kelvin Benjamin. It's all that play. Not that he called it on this game. And Aikman doesn't say a lot of great, memorable things the last few years yeah but first and goal from the one run the ball everybody just run the ball I don't want to accept the Patriots just run the ball you're gonna you're gonna get results

probably especially if you're Buffalo run the ball that pass interference call kicked them back I'm like they're gonna keep moving back I'm gonna miss this field goal they finally got it to go ahead three now that was huge McCoy was way better than I expected in that game I took him a little I think they played him right they weren't playing him all the time but yeah he had that one big run I don't know injury recovery is just outrageous though yeah and meanwhile I couldn't walk on Monday you said Fournette the other side Jacksonville's doing weird things like uh I think it was late in the third, second and ten at midfield. Fournette's out.

They hand off to Grant. And then third and seven, they bring Fournette back in and a pass play to somebody else. What are they doing? The worst thing I saw all weekend was Casey on that third and one when Tennessee had just everybody in the line. And they ran that little weird QB option with Alex Smith and he got tackled for a minus three. Slam. That was the worst play anyone's run all weekend.

I just don't understand how you have the whole season to prepare for a moment like that. Right. And you end up with a minus three. The reality is the AFC's terrible. We knew that. And somehow I talked myself into the favorites and we just all these teams suck I'm taking the points

Chargers would have been more fun yesterday Chargers would have been more fun I'm trying to think there's one other AFC team well the Ravens I guess not Ravens you think I think the Ravens would have been better than the Bills let me ask you this if Alex Smith is playing for the Jaguars

are you a little nervous as a Patriots fan The Ravens would have been better than the Bills. Let me ask you this. If Alex Smith is playing for the Jaguars, are you a little nervous as a Patriots fan? Yeah. He might be gone next year. It might be Mahomes. And, like, Jaguars need to keep up because you have Deshaun Watson and Andrew Luck coming back in that division. And Bortles, this will just be a one-and-done year

if Bortles is still there. So your choices are Alex Smith, Kirk Cousins. Yeah. Who else? Cousins, obviously, a nice fit. Eli Manning, maybe a long shot, a little bit. I don't think the Giants give him up for a year. Tom Coughlin, I think he's done.

So if Watson never gets hurt, the Texans are in one of those six. Sure. Six spots, and the point's been made. But if they take him over Fournette... The thing is, I didn't feel like Jacksonville's D was that great in that game. I think they're getting the great defense wrap, and it's a very good defense. I don't think it's a great defense. Buffalo had plays.

Guys were open. Runs were there. They were moving the ball. They threw a few over were moving the ball guys were putting their arms up they bring pressure but if you're going to bring that pressure you better get to Ty Taylor because he'll scramble for 13 did they even get a turnover in that game? well at the

Nathan Peterman I think Taylor threw a pick right? yeah they both did that's right Taylor pick, right? I had a reader. Yeah, they both did. I had a reader. That's right. Taylor did throw a pick.

I had a reader email me that Peterman, we have to name the Nathan Peterman hat trick, like the Gordie Howe hat trick. Because he came in and in four plays, he had a fumble, an interception, and an intentional ground. Oh, wow. That's pretty good. That's pretty good. That's a new club. Nathan Peterman hat trick.

That's a new club trillion for football. It was great. And that was the worst fourth down conversion I think I've ever seen. Yeah. Fourth and three, and he scrambled. He fumbled it out of bounds. When he went down, he still wasn't sure if he wanted to run with it. Can you imagine how scary it is to be just a backup quarterback hanging out,

watching this final drive, and all of a sudden you're in? Right. Yeah. Like, what the hell? I'm just holding the clipboard. That was a monster hit on Taylor. We saw some crazy hits yesterday, and Tate the Snake's Cam Newton is not...

I saw some plays like, how is he holding on to that ball? So that was the game of the day. Sure. I have no idea how the Saints didn't cover. They gave up McCaffrey's first big play of the entire season. Had no idea he had that in him. But it was 31-19. All we needed was the Saints to win in the tease.

You did that tease, right? And then Cam just kept coming back. I got to say, I thought Cam was incredible in that game. He was great. He needs a little help. He needs a little help. That Funchess is either injured or doesn't feel like playing. I don't see what it is with him, but he's the best target if it's not Olsen,

you know, and figuring out McCaffrey. But Jonathan Stewart, Tate, you're never going to get four yards of carry out of that guy. No. He won't be on the team next year. No, I don't think so. I think you're Mike Gillisley waiting to happen. Oh, my God.

Anything. Anything. Yeah. We talked about it. We said McCaff happen. Oh, my God. Anything. Anything. Yeah. We talked about it. We said McCaffrey. Hopefully, we'll move to the slot. I mean, he's a great receiver. Yeah.

Six catches, 101 yards. But I think they only give him like six carries or whatever just because he's tired or something. I don't know. I don't know what the point is. My favorite play was when Burson was wide open running down the sidelines and just fell down. Oh, yeah.

That summed up. And they were like, he's been waived five times. I can see why. The turf just tackled him. But they had Olsen on one leg. They had Funchess, who is just all-time trick or treat. You can watch him. He calls for the trainers before he's even down.

McCaffrey, who's kind of Alvin Kamara without the big plays, although he finally made one. And then just a bunch of scrubs. And Cam just willed them into that. Cam's a little trick-or-treat, too. But when he's on, he's terrifying. He was so good in that game. I thought there was a better chance.

And he definitely got concussed. I thought there was a better chance Kelsey came back. And Kelsey looked like a wounded, like a newborn doe right but when he when he stood up and it was it was scary as shit and i thought he would have a better chance than cam newton i mean the way his eye he had an eye injury his eyes were in the back of his head how could they even tell he had a he got poked in his eye even though he had a shield on oh man. That was a really embarrassing moment for the week. I tweeted about it a little last night. I just don't know why you have a concussion protocol on spotters if this guy gets racked,

he clearly got hit in the head, and then he's walking off the field and he falls to the ground, and three minutes later he's back in the field. Just stop. We're all going to feel terrible about watching football, and that's fine. But don't try to pretend player safety is important because it's not. We know it's not.

It's a fucking sham. And just stop. Oh, man. No more concussion protocol. Get rid of it. He was out of it. They added a rule a couple weeks ago that if you stumble or fall when you're leaving the field, you have to go to the locker room. Cam's out there three minutes later.

It's embarrassing. Yeah, he didn't go to the locker room. I mean, ugh. Unless they bring the locker room a lot closer to the field. I don't know. It's just the only way out. Did you think he was coming back, Tate? Yeah.

I saw it. Well, they showed him on the sideline, and he was like, I'm good. And usually, you know. He wasn't good for about two minutes. Yeah. Like they say, like boxers, boxers get knocked out, on the sideline and he was like, I'm good. He wasn't good for about two minutes. They say boxers get knocked out and two minutes later they're congratulating everybody.

Hey, great fight. That's how fast you can kind of regain your senses. Doesn't mean it's right. But I just think we should get rid of it. These guys know the risks now. If they want to come back in, fine. The NFL should absolve themselves of all whatever. And just let's call this for what it is.

Yeah, literally show the guy signing the release on the sideline. Like, yeah, I'm ready to play. Yeah, Cam's going to be suing the league in 40 years because he's going to have CTE, and it's going to be because he went back in three minutes after that injury. Well, I was worried. I'm like, oh, what's this hat going to look like, this postgame hat? He can't even get his hat.

It's going to be on backwards. Yeah, I don't know. But Tate called it, said Michael Thomas was going to be tough at 131 yards. He's excellent. Didn't you feel like he could have had a 15-yard seam route pass every time? It was funny how they decided that the run, they were more worried about the run than the pass, basically. The Panthers.

Yeah. They were like, we're fine giving up 15 20 30 40 you throw those they killed the run they killed it was like they wanted to have the ball back more often than just have these nine minute drives where they just beat the shit out of her right well i didn't even think it was gonna be close they've seemed they were happy to settle for a field goal every time and i'm like 21 9 21 12 how are they ever gonna get there and then they just then the defense just just stepped up and yeah but i still take fourth fourth and two is that the first field goal did you want them to go for i think you make a statement there right panthers on the road zero zero you're at the eight yard line or something yeah especially if you're gonna miss the field goal yeah right i mean that

was no problem yeah it was a basically a 14point swing. They would have been up if it was 7-0. Kalen Clay should have caught that pass. To go minus three on a kick like that is tough. Terrible. That is bad. I didn't like what I saw from the Saints defense in that game. No, not great. Even that last drive, Tate and I were talking about it before you got here.

Third down after the intentional grounding, Cam throws a perfect pass in the end zone of Funches. All Funches has to do is take one step to the left and reach out Randy Moss style. And that's a touchdown. And I can't believe he didn't even get his hands on it. It seemed like he could have adjusted. That was a touchdown.

That was an awesome pass. Or a pass interference or anything. That couldn't have been a better situation. One last thing on the weekend. Wait, did we cover every game? We covered all four. Oh, we did. Goodbye to John Gruden.

Another riveting performance by him. He said nothing. At one point told us the Titans have all these great skill players, which I thought was hilarious. Bullshit. They'd have to give him $200 million to coach the Titans. Refused to criticize the Chiefs for their play calling or anything that was going on in that game.

Told us that Alex Smith was a pro bowler at one point. It's like, if he's a pro bowler, which one of the top three is getting knocked out? And refused to acknowledge that he was taking the Raiders job, which they immediately announced after the game. After, yeah. Just admit you have the job. And then Sean McDonough, I mean,

I know Sean from Boston days. He's a nice guy. Felt bad for him because he had no chemistry whatsoever with Gruden the whole year. It's like, make jokes. Have fun with this. He's the Raiders coach. Say, hey, Joe, don't yell at that ref too much.

You're going to be dealing with him in a couple of weeks. ESPN's riding high. Everyone has to toe the line there. That Wicker Sham article, which I stress. We're going to talk about that. I stress Sham because I think that was all set up by Robert Kraft. Oh. Absolutely.

Interesting. Well, what did we learn from it? You read it. You were like, I don't care, right? You're like, what do we know? So Belichick likes Garoppolo, so nobody likes Guerrero, and Brady was unhelpful. What did we really learn?

We didn't learn anything. I did a podcast with Francesa about it Friday, and then I reread it Saturday morning. The first anecdote is all about how Brady yelled at McDaniels. Yeah. And it just dramatically tells this whole story. That gets you in because that's something everyone saw. Yeah, and then it's like insiders weren't surprised.

It's this whole cause and effect stretch that he yelled at McDaniels because this other stuff's going on. It's like, oh, maybe he just yelled at McDaniels. We have no idea. And then I continue. I've thought about it all weekend. I've talked to people. Kraft has been belligerent and adamant that this part of the story is not true,

that he told Belichick to trade Jimmy. I don't believe that he did. Well, then how does it go down, though, I wonder? It doesn't jive with anything that's happened in the last 17 years. There's no way he did that. No, so he just does it on his own and he's he's all right with it so my theory that espoused on friday was that belichick the one thing we know is he hates distractions and he hates when anything messes with where he thinks the season should be going and you have this situation with this 40 year old

qb who's who's too famous and is not really there that much. And then the backup who's really good, who wants to play, who's ready to be a starter. And he's buddies with all the offensive linemen and the receivers and all these guys. And he's kind of becoming the guy in the locker room. And Brady's like, that's my replacement right there. What if I get hurt? Are they going to shit cam me after the year?

And there's this little bit of uneasiness about it. Then you throw in the Guerrero stuff, and I think Belichick just looked at it and said, we can't pay both of these guys next year, which they can't. They could have franchised Garoppolo and hoped to get first-round picks for him, but I just don't think he wanted to deal with it. I think he just cut his losses on it.

Knowing that he's only going to coach for a couple more years. He's not seeing the next guy anyway, probably. Well, that's the big concern. I hesitate to say this, but he's only 65, which really isn't that old for a coach. He could do five more years. Then it would make sense to keep Garoppolo. I don't know.

For $20 million a year? Who does he care? So let's say they draft the next guy or they trade for the next guy. You put him under the Brady, have Brady tutor him, and you think he had three more years from Brady, and then I don't know. Well, the Brady tutoring him thing doesn't seem to hold any water. But some of that stuff got refuted from the piece over the weekend. Yeah?

Like that Garoppolo showed up at TB12. It's like, no, actually, he had a swipe card. He could go in whenever he wanted. There was a lot of little stuff that just immediately got refuted. I think it was nonsense anyway. I do. I really do. I do think light one more fire under the Patriots' ass.

Are you going to tell me that any team now is going to stay within 13 points? The Titans are going to stay within 13 and a half points now? The game after this article comes out? I was saying to my dad,'s for me it's a good thing sure just knowing how this patriot team loves distractions yeah it's a good thing you know what else is a good thing they get to play the titans this weekend which we're going to talk about in a second but first if you're trying online, odds are you've run into lazy text messages, dead-end conversations, and random matches that don't turn into dates. Well, eHarmony is unlike many other online dating sites.

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What game are you most excited about for the four? I think it would have to be Saints-Vikings. Bounty Gate rematch. Right. Bounty Gate rematch. Right. That's true. Week one rematch. That was Bounty Gate rematch. Right. That's true. Week one rematch, right?

That was one of the seven Monday night games. I'm like you. I don't know if I like what I saw out of the Saints defense. They played hard. They had some bone-crunching tackles and everything, but overall... A good defense closes up double digits. Yeah. And we saw that.

My fear with laying the nine with the Chiefs was that I knew their defense sucked, but I thought the Titans' offense would suck worse. Mariota, as bad as he is from an accuracy standpoint, I mean, how many throws? He had Corey Davis running down the sidelines that one time and literally overthrew him by nine yards. Yeah. That was a lot of that. As inaccurate as he is, he's still kind of a gamer.

He'll make plays and he'll kind of hang around, and it turned out he sucked less than the Chiefs defense. Against this Pats defense, I feel the same issue potentially. I'm not sure if their defense is good enough to kind of close. So I'm sure it's a high line, I guess. What did you guess for Titans pass? Well, this is the second. This is a Saturday night game.

Well, let's do this one first just because I brought it up. I said 15.5. Like I said, I think this article should have added two points to the spread. You said 14. It opened at 13.5, still 13.5. So you get that one. Because I think the defense. That's why. The defense isn't good enough. Even if they're up 30-9

with five minutes left, tights could still get a cheap one. It could be 30-20. Yeah, it could be like 30-15 or something. Well. I will say As our agent says, if you're betting the Titansans there i wish you a lot of luck well malarkey was so bad in the first half of that kc game i thought tennessee did some good

stuff in the second half that was the most well coached i've seen them yeah a lot of the adjustments they made were really smart and the stuff they were doing defensively was really smart and they really was once kelsey was gone they figured out like this team can't throw over the middle anymore and uh three points i look kelsey's great and he's perfect for that offense and he's a he's a wide receiver who wants to go over the middle yeah which which is rare yeah i know he's a tight end but he's basically a wide receiver and And they need three points to win that game. Three points in the second half. That's it.

I think it's almost impossible that the Titans can come back from 18 on the road against any playoff game. Yeah, shouldn't happen. It's probably the only time we'll ever see anything like that. So I think they have the we're happy to be here thing going right now, just like the Bills did this week. And does Andy Dalton have to give all that money back? Now that the Bills only scored three in the playoff game.

Oh, that's true. I didn't think of that. Good Lord. So a couple things worry me slightly. Yeah. Derrick Henry, I think, could – I'm still not totally sold on him as a good running back, but I think he could really... You're worried about that Ray Rice play in Foxborough.

We don't have a lot of size. And I do think there's a recipe for the Titans to just ball control, 40 seconds of play, run, run, play action, run, run, Delaney Walker, run, run, and just ugly game. Like every time the Patriots have ever lost a playoff game, it's been that type of game. Tate, how much of this do I have to listen to?

You know this is 34-13. Well, see, I think we can throw in their defense. Until Kelsey went out of that game, they had guys open all over the place. And then eventually they did the boa constrictor on them. Deion Lewis will be good. I think it'll be a little more high scoring than, I don't know, what's the over?

Over is 47. It's the highest one of the weekend. So the weather, it seems like it's going to be around 30. We'll get some good weather games, I think. Three out of four, yeah. Not too cold, though. Because I was looking at that Philly-Atlanta game. There's a weather threshold that I think would be bad for the Falcons.

Right. I think if it goes 20 and under, but I don't know if it'll happen. So we can't tease that game. We can't really have fun with that game in any way. Titans-Pats. Why? What do you mean i don't know the patriots are gonna kill them i'm gonna have fun with it you don't have to have fun

with it what are you gonna do i don't know i'm gonna take it straight i'm gonna tease it i'm telling you matt got that you don't even have to make a video this week i'm patriots that's a big that's a win dark Dark Matt. Dark Matt. Do we take anything away from last Saturday where the tease was so obvious that it's almost like you have to go the other way because there's no way everyone could win on gambling? Our friend Dave Tooley wrote a sport for VSIN.com. That's a gambling site.

The books were just terrified heading into Saturday. They were like, we need an underdog to win. And they got it right away. We're in major trouble here. Someone said something about how we have to bet every game because now there's 11 left once you get to the playoffs. But when you bet, even if you bet one of the Saturday games, that's betting half the games.

That's like betting eight games on a regular Sunday. And we would never win betting eight games. Right. Psychologically, we have to do it. And yeah, it bites you in the ass eventually. The whole week, I was like, I'm not putting money on this Chiefs-Titans game. I'm not. You are.

You put a Twitter poll up there. You're like, I need help. I don't know what this is. Keep me away from this. And then Saturday morning rolls around. You start getting excited. It's the playoffs. It's like, ah, ah, ah.

Right. Ah. And then all of a sudden you're putting it back. There's Andy Reid. Oh, man. 21-3 at half. What do we have? What's the early Saturday?

Early Saturday, 435 Eastern, Atlanta at Philly. Like you said, there could be weather. That's a good game. I like it, too. People are chalking up an automatic win for the Falcons. Not sure about that. I've been on a roller coaster ride with this Falcons team because I believed in them midway through the year

and picked them a couple times and they came through. And then they hurt my feelings in one game. Then they came through again. Then there was another feelings hurt. What was that, at New Orleans? Lots of feelings. The 20-10 when they had all those red zone plays and kept screwing up

and then they kind of rallied back again and now it seems like they have their mojo again I still don't trust them but you nailed this line you said three I said two and a half you said Falcons by three it is three

if Wentz is playing this game over Foles it's Eagles by six. Yeah, maybe. That might be a little high. It was Rams by six. Yeah. Yeah, and look what happened. I think it's a nine-point swing from Wentz to Foles.

Foles throws one interception. They could win a 17-14 game. From what we saw from Foles a couple weeks ago. I know. It's like he's starting from scratch. I almost don't know what you do if you're the coach. We saw it yesterday with the Jags. How do you instill confidence in your QB when he's having a nervous breakdown,

basically? What do you do at that point? You can't throw outs. You don't want to throw over the middle because somebody's going to tip it. You send them a TB12 with a swipe card. That's what you do. Basically, you have play action, and that's it.

And then eventually the team figures out the play action. So the one thing I don't understand why the teams don't do more is the 40-yard chuck down in the field. It's the nervous energy, just fucking wing it. I didn't understand why they didn't do that with Bortles. With Bortles, yeah. Just send dudes downfield and have Bortles wing it.

If it gets picked, it's picked. At least it's like a punt. Seems like you get a call every three throws, like a pass interference or a holding call. How funny was it that they interviewed Bortles after that game? I didn't even stick around. I changed. Did they?

Yeah, that was the Jaguar. He was the guy? Yeah. Blake! Yeah, you gritted that one out. It's like, Blake, you had 90 yards passing. No pie to the face, no whipped cream, nothing? No, no Gatorade bath.

What team is he on next year? I don't know the CFL team. Arizona? Yeah, Arizona. Tate, what team is Bortles on next year? Does the ArenaL teams. Arizona? Yeah. Arizona. Tate, what team is Borussia next year? Does the Arena League have an Arizona team? Yeah, someone will give him a shot. Why not Arizona?

Sure. I think he's going to stay in Jacksonville. I think he stays in Jacksonville. I do too. He's the leading rusher. Can we really say he won a playoff game? Ten points at home against that frisky Bills defense that gave up 37 of the bats?

Should we go to that one Sunday? Jacksonville, Pittsburgh. That's the early Sunday. You don't want to talk about the Falcons one a little more? All right. I just think that could be close. I do. I don't know.

I think eventually we're going to see the old Falcons, the new old Falcons where they score 14 to 20 points. Who wins the NFC? Vikings. Case Keenum, you're all in. Yeah. I still have Vikings-Patriots as my Super Bowl matchup. So you think the Vikings could host a home

Super Bowl? Yeah. I just can't see that happening. You throw in the Vikings DNA and something bad is going to happen. Peter King wrote an interesting thing. The Saints could play there three times this year. Because they played in Minnesota first week. Yeah, this week.

Oh, that's really good. Maybe February 4th. All right, Sunday. All right, Jacksonville or Pittsburgh. I said 6.5. I went way low. You said 8.5. Started at 8.5.

You were good this week. It's at 9 right now. Yeah, Bortles. They don't want you to tease that. I put an extra four points in because of Bortles. Yeah. Don't you think they're going to play a little better? Don't you think we're going to get zigzagged here? The team that doesn't... And remember, one of these bye teams is going to come out flat.

Offensively, at least. Is there a chance? I wish Jacksonville's defense was a little bit better. I think in our heads, we think it's this vaunted, awesome defense, and I don't know if it is. I think they had a really easy schedule. But against these good offenses, as the season went along,

I don't think they're a dominant defense. No, but Ty Taylor, I know you hate him, but he's not. Obviously, Roethlisberger's a better quarterback, but that might be a better matchup for Jacksonville. Doesn't move as much. I am a believer in if you beat the team handily like that, that you do have a lot of confidence. I didn't realize that the Titans won in KC last year.

That might have single-handedly swung my pick. Titans won in KC. Because they changed it 100 times. They won in Week 15 last year in KC. I do think there's something to that. Like when the Dolphins play the Pats in Miami, they really seem like they think they can win every time. Bortles had.

You have, who's Dallas's team like that? What, that comes in and wins? There's a team that comes into Dallas that's always like, we're very comfortable here. Might be your Panthers, Tate. Yeah. Because Cam's going to end up in Dallas at some point. Sure.

I think, though, Blake had 95 yards passing against Pittsburgh in week five. Yeah. In week five. Yesterday was bad, too. But this could be another game where it could be close and have nothing to do with Blake Bortles. I thought playoff Fournette was going to show up in that game.

We haven't seen – remember that – what was that, week four, week five? He had 181 rushing against Pitt. Was it against the Steelers, right? Yeah, pretty sure. And he had that one play when he challenged the safety and he just popped him. He doesn't seem like that anymore. No, he doesn't. I don't know whether he's nursing an injury or the season wore him down

or whatever, but I don't see the same fr nursing an injury or the season wore him down or whatever, but I don't see the same friskiness from him. He said football was easy, didn't he? I thought he said in the beginning of the year, football's so much easier than I thought. You think Fournette's the same? Tate? No, I think he said it was worn down. They said it on the broadcast, right?

They said he said it was a really long season. He didn't know how long it was. Well, maybe he shouldn't have said it was easy. He didn't expect it to be this long. It's a long season. I had no idea you played 16 games. I didn't know Jaguars were going to make it this far. Come on.

We played portals. And on the flip side, Derrick Henry kind of fresh. Yeah. Because he wasn't playing full time. Yeah, you're right. But are the Steelers the kind of team that scores 45 points? What Antonio Brown am I getting? It's interesting.

Yeah, probably 70%, 80%. I don't know. They have so many more offensive weapons. It's ridiculous. He's been training with Ocho Cinco. You guys didn't know that. Has he? Yeah.

Oh, wow. So I'd say 60%. Another thing with this, is the Steelers defense kind of the slam the door shut level without Shazier? Yeah, no. Probably not. No, I don't think so. Yeah, this feels like a stay away. Tough, tough one.

I may not gamble on anything this weekend. Well, the last one we touched on a little bit, New Orleans at Minnesota. Again, you nailed it. Three and a half. Vikings a favorite. I said three. Yeah, this is a good one. This is the best one.

So it's three or three and a half? Three and a half right now. Vikings 29-19 in week one. One thing I was thinking that maybe we should remember for next year, that NFC South, it was basically a playoff game every week in December. That was fun. There was was basically a playoff game every week in December. That was fun.

There was kind of a conditioning slash seasoning. All those teams had tough schedules as the year went along. Atlanta was in a lot of big games and a lot of nationally televised games and things like that. New Orleans, they're all playing each other. Maybe there's something to that, like just playing each other all the time and the quality of play, and then you go into these playoffs and you can yeah kind of play up at that level yeah two nfc south teams in the

final eight is pretty i don't know if i would have thought that in the beginning of the year because i you know after the fact i'm trying to think like did i overrate the rams and they really didn't have that many tough games this year you know they had they were like the classic easy schedule team that right whatever and i think i might have overrated or underrated that one but even their tough games were easy at seattle right at seattle they crushed them they went into tennessee and they won that one um they had the minnesota game that they stunk in but i thought they were going to learn from that minnesota game Obviously not. Philly was tough. Yeah.

Philly was tough. They probably had four or five. But the Saints, man, they've played a bunch of these now. Even early in the season, they started out with the Vikings and the Pats, week one, week two. Right. Yeah, I don't know the last time we had four on the dogs covering a weekend. I thought it happened two years ago.

Did it? Two years ago? What? All four? Well, the frustrating thing is when you pick the team right and they don't cover it. Because last year, all 11 teams won and covered. And then the year before, like four of them won but didn't cover. Wow.

Was it that? Yeah. Hold on. Let's take a quick break. Hey, January means three things. Cold weather, the NFL playoffs, and The Bachelor. Oh, yeah. The Ringer Podcast Network has responded by spinning off Juliette Lippman's Bachelor Party podcast into its own feed.

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Subscribe right now. Is Pittsburgh-New England Moneyline Parlay a lock? No. No. I don't think the Pittsburgh one's a lock. All right. Well, first of all, do we have any idea when Antonio Brown comes back? Well, when in the week, you mean?

No, just like what are we getting from him? Are we getting like, is he going to practice this week? Is he going to play Thursday, Friday, Saturday? Is he going to be 60%? Don't you feel like Bryant and Juju Smith-Schuster are better than anything the Jaguars have to offer offensively? Even Antonio Brown has a decoy. You still have to put Ramsey on him or something.

They still need their third and eight guy. They don't have. I don't think either of their tight ends are very dangerous. The crowd will get nervous right away. That's a nervous crowd. Yeah. I don't know. Pretty good. I actually't know. Be good.

I actually think three of these games could be decided in the fourth quarter. The one to make money on is Atlanta-Philly. And probably Saints-Vikings, too, if that line settles at three. But those three-point lines, those are the ones. You're saying take the favorite? Figure it out. No, just figure out which side you're on and go in on that. Yeah.

It's tough to load up on foals, but I do like that Philly defense. We also have to wait to see where everybody is. Everyone's betting? Yeah. You saw on Saturday that

it was teasers galore. Teasers and parlays all over the place. We're not even going to mention our rest in peace Joe House, what he did on the Chiefs. Uncharacteristic Joe House. I loved it. I almost intervened. House of balls.

Chiefs money line. God bless you. Chiefs money line. What a terrible loss, though, for him. That was so strange. He might have eaten himself to death. Have we figured that out? Do we have to call house?

Can we call house? Do you want to call house? Yeah, call house. We're trying to figure out why you did the Chief's Moneyline bet. We just wanted to walk it through with you. I'm just happy he still has a cell phone. I mean, the links I'm going to have to go to, you know, the first search on Google this morning when I arrived at work was sperm donor. Unfortunately.

Can you bet on that? Unfortunately, I'm a little, huh? Can you bet on sperm donor? Can we bet on your sperm? I'm sure you can. Like, how many blanks, how many good hits, how lively are the guys? I think I'm outside the age range, though, is the problem. Oh, man.

So then I went over to blood. Blood is fine, but you can't give enough money for blood. I think blood is a better bet for you. You don't want your seed out there. I don't know. I mean, who knows what I've been exposed to over the years. Listen, I went on Forum.com this week, so I'm not one to judge. I just want know. Who knows what I've been exposed to over the years. Listen, I went on forum.com this week, so I'm not one to judge.

I just want to know your thought process. Andy Reid had lost five straight home playoff games, and we get a text from you like an hour before the game that you're in on the Chiefs' money line. Walk us through it. This is exactly the point. You've hit the nail on the head. Andy Reid

had lost five previous playoff games. And in each of those instances, going back and looking at the history of his experience, it was my judgment that each and every time he was up against either a superior coach or a superior quarterback, this was the instance. There's always a regression, right? I believe in math. I believe in the laws of physics. This is a Kirk Goldsberry angle.

Looking at it, at some point, he will win a playoff game. It was my firm conviction and belief that this was that point, that we'd finally reach the moment when he was going to, you know, break through. He had, by all indications, the superior team and the superior quarterback. And, you know, I think he's better than Malarkey. The one thing that I will never forgive myself for is at halftime. Answering the phone. Go ahead. That makes me happy.

The thing I'll never forgive myself for is not sending a text at halftime val saying what is the andy reed insurance right now because the money line at halftime had to have been incredible right do you want me to even tell you i mean you're gonna get sick if i tell you do you want to tell me i mean i bet if I bet 50 bucks I would have had the whole fucking thing covered. Well, not quite. It was 15 to 1 odds. 15 to 1.

15 to 1. Easy way to cover. Easy way to cover. But still, I didn't have any reason at halftime. And this is it. I meant to text that I just didn't have the heart because I was so disheartened.

I got butt-fucked by Butker. This Butker's motherfucking kick doesn't hit the goddamn fucking upright. I would have been a winner. I know. He was my fantasy MVP, Butker. I know. It's bad.

Let's not get on Al's case. 2018, off to a bunch-buck start. Well, 21 to 3. I was looking into throwing House a parade for doing the money line for the Chiefs. 21 to 3 at half. I think it's interesting. I have to tell a story. My son came in, and I'm watching the Chiefs. And he goes, is this Joe House's team?

And I was like, no, no, he roots for the Redskins. It is today. And he goes, they suck, right? And I'm like, well, no, the Redskins suck. The Chiefs are actually a little bit better. But I feel like he might have put the Maloik on you, House. Oh, wow. He thought it was your team.

I take it on. I put it all on myself, obviously. I did it. It was my mistake i've learned a lifelong lesson well it was it was a double whammy for you because then you didn't join us on the uh on the jags and the and the saints teas because you were so scarred from saturday i know that's it i mean i learned the lesson i felt like the karma gods told me something. Well, listen, Harry from the Degenerate Trifecta, the Indonesian Open is this weekend in golf. Yeah.

Is it the Vietnam Open? There was a tournament in Maui how he was betting yesterday. There was something going on. The Hanoi Classic? Oh, no, I know that tournament. I watched a shit ton of it. It's the first great tournament of the season. There you go. There's plenty of that.

Maybe there's some golf for you this weekend, House. Oh, don't think for one second I'm not going to try and win all that fucking money back by betting on golf. God damn it. And by the way, Sal, please, I beg you, don't send me the update text on the map of what the sum of it is.

I can't handle it. I know what the number is. I already know what the time is. Okay, I won't. All right. I can't handle it. I can't handle it. I know what the number is. I already know what the number is. Every Monday I try to check in, but that's okay. Listen, let's let House get back to it. He has to put in overtime today. Yeah.

All right. Good house to the blood and semen house. Thank you. I appreciate it. See you, buddy. Talk to you. Let's take one more break. Every BS podcast fan has heard me rave about FrameBridge.

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and they even offer a happiness guarantee. If for any reason you aren't 100% satisfied with your order, they will make it right. Frame your photos or art today. Go to framebridge.com and use promo code BS to save an additional 15% off first order what a deal framebridge.com promo code bs all right we're back we're gonna do parent corner a second but i wanted to call my friend hanch who you might remember from my friend 25 yeah it sounds friend too i'm sorry

use your friend first you remember oh hey buddy what? You remember, Hench, from the 25 Greatest Patriots Win podcast in August that almost caused a riot on the internet. Which also led to our 50 greatest mistakes in the 25 Greatest Patriots Win. It's hard to keep them straight. That's true. Getting big wins confused. Hench, give us your take quickly as an aggrieved Patriot fan on ESPN's Brady Belichick craft story.

Well, I mean, it's so ridiculous. First of all, like why they take shots at Tom Brady for staying in shape and take shots at Alex Guerrero for keeping the industry of ESPN, just taking shots at the Pats, this latest one, to me, would be like writing a story after John Wooden's 10th championship saying he's losing it. Like, what? They're the defending champs, and they're the number one seed. It's all falling apart, people. Can't you see it's coming apart?

I mean, it's so ridiculous. Why anyone clicks on it's so ridiculous. Why anyone clicks on it is just pathetic. I mean, ask any other franchise, who wouldn't switch places with us with all this turmoil between the owner and the coach and the quarterback?

Sal, you're rebuttal. I think he's being sarcastic here. I really don't. Which is why I think it's fake news. It's a made-up article. The Patriots plan it to get an us-versus-them mentality. Yes, that's all. Robert Kraft, one more fire under the ass.

That's it. I don't think it was Kraft. It's so nice that the Patriots don't give an F about any of that stuff. They just prepare. They know that the game is won during the week, during preparation. You know, it's so funny when people are like, did they get James Harrison to get Intel? The Steelers never do anything different against us.

They just get strafed every year. They run the same terrible defense defense and Brady picks them apart. Hey, James Harrison, are they going to do nothing again? Are we going to destroy them again? Great. Just wanted to confirm that. That Mike Tomlin's going to run up and down the sideline pumping his fist and yelling

while Bill Belichick prepares his team to win another championship. Fantastic. A lot of people hate Hench, but I hate him because he's right. I do. Wait a minute. I did not hear this first part.

Oh, yeah, forget the first part. Yeah. Okay. With that said, Hench has sent me between 100 and 175 emails about the Garoppolo trade over the last six weeks. You haven't handled that well, Hench. It's going to be bad.

Because as we've discussed, I think right around week eight next year, it's going to be clear that we didn't get enough. And Brian Hoyer is going to be sitting there with the clipboards. It's going to be rough. That's all right. But we're playing with house money. We're playing with house money. We're playing with house money.

I mean, let's face it. Aaron Rodgers, Matt Ryan. There's none of that. Joe House's money. We're playing with Joe House's money. Aaron Rodgers, Matt Ryan, and Russell Wilson combined will not win as many Super Bowls as Tom Brady. It's ridiculous.

This is great. I feel so glad you feel better. Yeah,. It's ridiculous. This is great. I feel so glad you feel better. Yeah, I feel better now. This is great. I needed this confidence. Simmons is concerned about the 13.5 point spread. I think it should be 130.5.

Is he concerned that Derrick Henry is bigger than all of our defensive players? I made that point earlier. I was like, we're a little undersized. Yeah, so what? It is. That is a little scary. Wait a second.

If Alan Branch doesn't play, I think he actually might be bigger than anyone on our front seven. Derrick Henry would start at nose guard. All right, Hinch. Hey, did you guys already cover the terrible officiating? Yeah, we got into that a little bit. We did 100% cover it. Do you have any thoughts? Well, I just love that, like,

if you count forward progress like a fly hitting the windshield, I mean, yeah, of course, technically, forward progress is stopped in a nanosecond. The idea that they just moved on from that fumble in the Titans-Cheese game, which, by the way, was the whole game, definitely, definitely the whole game. They just kind of moved on.

Yeah, forward progress stopped, okay, moving on. And then they know they effed that up so horribly that later in the game, while Derrick Henry is lying on his back for 15 seconds, Walmart and Peters works at the ball. They're like, nobody blow the whistle. Don't blow the whistle. And then Derrick Johnson has to run 55 yards and then get back and make a play because no one blew the whistle anyway.

I thought it was pretty telling that they made the Jeff Triplett immediately retire after the game. You know you've done a really especially horrible job. I've never seen that before. Not even in the NBA where we've had some of the worst reffing of all time. 12 years too late. Yeah, nobody's ever made a ref retire within 24 hours. That is the coldest a ref has ever physically, visibly appeared.

Like, he would make a call in his mouth. He couldn't really form the words. So, you know, he was like, forward progress. Okay, let's keep this clock running. Come on. And then, and then you guys, this is, by the way,

this happens every year. This is every year, every week, 4th and 57, quarterback throws it as far as he can. Hey, DB, make sure you catch it. Don't knock it down. God forbid you knock it down and get the ball 20 yards

further upfield. They never do it. They never just bat it down with two hands and take the ball where they should get the ball. John Payton should have been punished. John Payton should have been punished for that. He really did luck out. And it was one of those interceptions,

Hanch, that, okay, I could see if you think you could return it 20, 30 yards, but he's flying. That's a diving catch where he's not going to... That's it. He's got no more yards than where he is right there. And the fact that they didn't review that, that doesn't survive the surviving the ground challenge

for sure. In a year where if you did not successfully carry the ball to the mantle above your fireplace it was an incomplete pass, how that just moved right on. We're going to mark it right here. It's completely insane. I guarantee he gets a $15,000

bonus for that interception. Somewhere in his contract. The playoff interception. Sure. his contract. Play off an interception. Somewhere in his contract. Sure. Sal, we didn't even talk about Payton going for it on fourth and two. I know. Was one of the most inexplicable things I can remember. Well, the run on third and two and then going for it.

Yeah. I thought they were kidding. Which was better? Which was a better play call? That weird fourth and two rolling the pocket to Hail Mary or the Chiefs third and two. Alex Smith. Alex Smith jogging to the right.

It was such an apocalyptic disaster. It's worked all year. It's worked all year. Oh, my God. You don't think year. It's worked all year. You don't think that play should have worked against a nine-man line that was dying to attack it? What are you doing? Meanwhile,

I was heartened after my terrible CFL season to see the numbers you guys put up over the weekend. We have this playoff thing. We go head-to-head. It's a picks pool the whole year. Yeah.

I was like 50 games over 500. I went 0-5 in the playoffs. We were both 0-5. You were both 0-5. Yeah. There were four games, and you guys went 0-5. That tells you how bad you were. We lost the Alabama game.

It hasn't even been played yet. Hench, always a pleasure to talk to you soon. All right, my brothers. I'll see you soon. See you, guys. See, you were scared about calling Hench. I know pleasure to talk to you soon Alright my brothers, I'll see you soon See you guys See, you were scared about calling Hench I know, it worked out It was like the Pulp Fiction Tarantino injection of whatever into the chest scene Right, and now you're up on the pats again

Yeah, well, sort of Let's quickly, let's talk about Golden Globes Did you learn anything for the Oscars? We're about ready to do like a big Oscar prop bet. Yeah, this is going to be big. I have, well that's a good indicator over the years, the Golden Globes winners versus

you know, you could see who get good odds on the Oscars, but I don't know. I like Guillermo del Toro. What else do we like? Well, the thing with the Golden Globes sometimes it gets reactionary to whatever the mood of the year

in Hollywood is and this year it was clearly the mood was a certain way and a lot of the award winners were so I don't know what to make of that I didn't notice a certain mood I noticed a mood I will say our cousin Jimmy getting to watch Seth Meyers be the stuntman for basically

what the room's going to be like for those things. Right. The one thing we learned is Harvey Weinstein, the room's going to die. Off the table? The moment his name gets mentioned, I think it's a combination of just nervousness and then also nobody wants the camera cutting to them laughing. Right, right laughing right after. So everyone just clams up, and you could feel it.

For that and Woody Allen, those were the two touchstone names that you just feel everybody's sphincters clench. Yeah, this is going to be a tough one. Which means Jimmy will go all in on those names, trying to get a reaction. How much does our agent James Babydoll Dixon get for leaving Jimmy unprotected, hosting the Oscars this year? Is this, I know, I think by the time the Oscars rolls around, I think it'll be.

I hope so. I hope it's, I mean, yet last night was supposed to be the fun one, right? The Golden Globes. Everyone's, everyone's lit on Chablis,

you know, and it was such a serious tone. Like, oh man. Yeah. But Oprah's running for president. So. I can't find the Oscar ads.

Oprah was spectacular. Well, there's no Oscar. The nominees haven't come out. The January 23rd, I think, or something. But I thought they put the odds out ahead of time. No? I think they wait for the nominees. All right.

Parent Corner, you want to go first? I'll go first, because I think I need your help with this one. So your daughter plays soccer. Yeah. You're there six times a week in terrible cities in california all over like five yeah and uh my son plays basketball and uh he's really good defender doesn't screw up selfless to a point like he'll get the ball in the paint and he will i've seen him dribble and he could dribble but but passes it off,

and they lost a close game because he – because I think because he doesn't go to the hoop. And so when – after the coach meets with the team afterwards for a few minutes after the game, from that point to when you get home, where do you start talking about what you should have done? Like, I'm trying to be a good dad. Oh, that's a great question. Not that it's a bad dad. Like, the parlay kid for he has five kids and he will he'll go like

a week without talking his kids if they miss a free throw you know like i know that's not right so but i but also you know play hard you're out there once a week play hard so what what do you say when when from post game to home do you bring it up? It's a great question. I battled with this a lot over the years. First of all, I'd like to know how long the drive was. Seven minutes. You don't bring it up then?

Not at all. You wait until later. Wow. Yeah. We weren't at the car yet. We're walking to the car. I was like, Arch, you have to take it to the hoop you have these these extra passes it's it's driving me absolutely crazy be aggressive be

aggressive please i know you could do it just get fouled get to the line that's all this team needs and this is you know and i but i did say good game in front of the coach i was like oh good game i saw some things i liked you know, that was great and everything. And I say this to him, and he's exhausted too because it's the first game of the year. He's not really in shape for it. And he looks at me, he's like, what do you care? You were watching the Chiefs game on your phone,

which is not a lie. It's not a lie. But I could watch both. You could do both, right? I have the Chiefs. That's incredible. It was 21-9. I was like, they were coming back.

I couldn't just put it down. I had to watch both. And then I had to explain to them. I was like, listen, your inheritance is a lot less if these Moneyline parlays keep losing. This is important. Do you realize how much Joe House has on the Chiefs? Even more important than you taking the ball to the hoop

is me hitting the first leg of this Moneyline parlay. And then I think he understood. But I am, like, seriously, like, when do you do it? Do you ever say anything? So, first of all, you have to put yourself in their shoes. Especially if you've had the conversations before and they know they didn't do stuff right. The last thing they want to do is talk about it in in the car which it took me a couple years to learn with that said we had a game in uh palm spring once against palm springs a couple months ago against

this really good team that was like kind of our biggest game of the regular season my daughter's soccer team and she like every six months she'll go in a funk for like three four weeks and she was in one of her confidence funks and she didn't play well. I could tell before the game, she was chewing her nails. I'm like, what the fuck is she nervous for? This is, so she didn't play well. And, um, I think he took her out for like the last 20 minutes. And I was, I was just, I was so mad that she was like nervous for this game.

It's like, how many times do we have to go through these emotional rollerco funks so we get in the car now we have to drive all the way back to la and i'm like i'm not gonna talk about this game i'm just gonna put football on and drive through and we're driving we're driving i'm not talking about the game she falls asleep and like about the hour mark i'm like i gotta bring this up so she wakes up wakes up from that she's like how far away are we i'm like why were you more aggressive it's like the longer you're in the car yeah yeah it just gets worse and worse yeah yeah the thing you have to remember is they're just little people that with not fully formed brains yet and the weirdest thing can throw them off and it also doesn't matter it doesn't right

it doesn't no one's playing pro no no one's playing pro but to be aggressive i think is always a good thing sure be aggressive i'm also paying 300 so you can play basketball wear shorts once a week and play basketball and not be nervous yeah that's the thing it's like what's the bit worst thing that's gonna happen your team loses you'll be fine yeah i'm watching the football game anyway it It doesn't matter. I have a parent corner update about the Logan Paul situation. Oh, let's hear it. You've turned the corner.

You're a big Logan Paul fan. It's been a very polarizing subject in the elementary schools. Has it? My daughter unfollowed him. Really? On Twitter. And has a couple friends in her life who have also gone the other way and been like, we should support him.

He made a mistake. He admitted it. So there's been real dialogue right around. My son's all in. He's supporting the Logang to the bitter end. Logan Paul took a little break from everything to kind of re-evaluate things. So that's where that stands. Oh, man, I hesitate to do this one.

My parent corner, this is the first time I've ever actually had to hold off from the parent corner I want to do. Yeah. We really need a sponsor. If we have like a full-fledged sponsor, I would go all in on parent corner. Then it'll be worth it for your son to hate you if we get $75 a week my son has his girlfriend and he's 10 years old

and it's unbelievable and my wife's really upset about it but that's not the that's not the one I would do so I'll do this one. Fridays in my daughter's school is free dress day. Yeah.

Your son's school, they don't have to wear a shirt every day or anything, right? No, not every day. But Friday, they usually wear the school shirt or something. So Friday is their free dress day, and now everyone's in the seventh grade, and it's turned into the most important day of the week. And everybody's got their outfits ready, and they're on Instagram or text, texting back and forth, sending pictures. What are you wearing?

Two of her friends wear the same shirt. Is this too tight this whole thing and it's like four hours a night on thursday night it's about what free dress day is going to be and uh and i'm just not ready for the next seven years four hours for you somehow had three sons you motherfucker that's the way to do it yeah you motherfucker yeah i have i have uh just changes going on and then in the morning the next day my wife being upset and there's yelling at 7 15 in the morning just creamy matches you should get free dress day sponsored she got a

new outfit every week you wouldn't have to worry about it well she she's actually pretty low-key compared to some of the other children. Right. But I just can't believe seventh grade. It's like going from preseason to the playoffs. Yeah. Right. It's bizarre. Yeah.

All of a sudden, people are 5'6". They've hit puberty. They're wearing clothes that, like, she's wearing stuff from my wife's closet. I'm like, what is going on wow yeah just kill me that's my parent corner this week just shoot me there make sure she doesn't date logan paul it'll be fine i was really proud of her that she was upset about the logan paul thing yeah good fun yeah it was good uh man i really wish i could do the parent corner next week think about it for next week i don't I don't know. I don't know if I can do it.

What do you got to plug? I don't know. Against all odds, it's Wednesday night. Tate will be there. Divisional round, best bets. We're going to have some props for you. And on Jimmy Kimmel Live, Meryl Streep and Jason Ritter, the very overrated Meryl Streep, will be on our program.

Meryl Streep. When are people going to catch on to her? Yeah. Okay, so we're coming back a week from now with winners. We're going to be celebrating. That'll be nice. We're going 4-0 this weekend. Let's do it.

Let's really do it. I'm sticking to my guns. I feel like my system works. We've watched a lot of football this year. We have good feel for teams. We can't get flustered by just one bad weekend. We're coming back. I like it.

Rest in peace, Joe House. Our big T's won this week. Yeah. All right. Just double up if you lose. Yeah. All right. Thanks to ZipRecruiter.

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That is SimpliSafe with two I's. Thanks to Bachelor Party. Listen to Julietiet litman's latest podcast on monday night tonight with my wife the sports gal right after the bachelor ends on abc subscribe to bachelor party or on apple podcasts or wherever you get podcasts thanks to my son um i'm really glad i didn't do that parent corner because at some point in our life you know what's really scary our kids are gonna going to take care of us someday. Yeah, they'll take care of us. I feel like every slight they'll remember, right?

Yeah. Like you did that Kirk Douglas stage last night at the Golden Globes. I think my son would just wheel me off the stage. We're going to have tubes in our mouths, and they're going to have their arms folded just replaying the parent corner stuff. Replaying the parent corner, how you watched the Chiefs game during your son's basketball. Sal, good job by you.

Good job by you. On the wayside On the first side of the road I don't have to ever forget