The Bill Simmons Podcast - NFL COVID Woes, Giants Fever, Tyson-Jones, and Thanksgiving Shenanigans With Cousin Sal

Episode Date: November 30, 2020

The Ringer’s Bill Simmons is joined by Cousin Sal to discuss the Saints' win over the QB-less Broncos, the Falcons' shellacking of the Raiders, the Rams' loss to the 49ers, plus Chiefs-Buccaneers, Chargers-Dolphins, Patriots-Cardinals, NFC East–watch, and more (3:00). They discuss the Mike Tyson–Roy Jones Jr. and Jake Paul–Nate Robinson boxing matches (38:00), before guessing the NFL lines for Week 13 (49:00). Then they close the show with Parent Corner (1:10:00). Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What's up? This is Bakari Sellers, and I'm host of the Bakari Sellers podcast. You know, twice a week on my podcast, we cover all the news, the issues of the day through interviews with all types of guests. And so far, I've talked to people like Deshaun Watson, Charlamagne Tha God, Donna Brazile, even my good friend, Hillary Clinton. So listen to the Bakari Sellers podcast on Spotify or wherever you get your podcast. This episode is brought to you by my old friend, Miller Lite. I've been a big fan of Miller Lite, man, since,

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the Cuzz and I are going to break down a typically ridiculous weekend of football. First, Pearl Jam. All right, the Cuz is here. Just, I didn't even know what to say about this weekend. We had the single dumbest football game I think we've ever had since I've been an NFL fan. Denver loses all their quarterbacks to COVID. The NFL's like, no, keep playing. Just do it. And it was so enticing that the line for Denver

to score more than 10 and a half points was plus 140. And I was like, fuck it. Maybe they'll get a defensive touchdown. The running backs, nope. They couldn't even barely get first downs. They threw picks. It was the single worst game I think I can ever remember seeing on any of my television screens.

Cuz, what was your take watching this? I felt bad a little bit because I don't know, would you have found that 10 and a half over under if I didn't alert you to it early this morning? No, because I was trying to figure out a way to bet the plus 17 teased with the over-under.

You weren't allowed to do anything with that game, so I just ended up doing the over. I can't stand it. I can't stand it or understand it. I don't know why some games play. I don't know why some games don't. I don't stand it. I can't understand it or understand it. I don't know why some games play. I don't know why some games don't.

I don't know why Ravens are half their squad has COVID, but they're still going to play Tuesday. But Denver was forced. I guess they wanted to make an example out of Denver because there was footage or a picture of something where the quarterbacks were hanging out together. So they broke protocol there, which is ridiculous to me that this still goes on. They need to do the Air Force One treatment

where the president flies and then the vice president's on another flight. So they're never together. I can't believe this is still a thing, but it makes me think that it is a little bit arbitrary, right? Just as draft picks are going away, there's going to be fines levied. The Titans probably should have forfeited two games, but because their behavior occurred earlier in the season, they get a break and they weren't forced to play with half a team. I know. I don't get it. And then you have to bet on these games and you're in pools and stuff and you're running fantasy leagues.

It's disgusting. Yeah. Running a fantasy league or being involved in a fantasy league is just so much work than it used to be. We have these little injured list things. But I just go back to the NFL obviously made a decision in mid-August. We're having the season. We're treating every COVID thing like it's a sprained ankle

or a pulled hamstring. And that's just what we're doing. We're not bending the rules. We're not changing our strategy here no matter what happens. Even if a team loses all its quarterbacks two hours, two days before a game, screw it. They can play the running backs, the quarterback. Oh, this guy, this receiver on the Broncos, he was an all state high school champ who also played some QB in college. They'll be fine. Yeah. Let's just do it. Just throw them out there. I just, you know, and I know I'm looking at it from the NFL's perspective and they're like, okay, if that Raven Steelers game plays Tuesday, they will have gone 12 weeks without having to

miss a game. Right. Or having someone forfeit a game. And that's pretty good. That's pretty cool that they could do that. But that's where they're like, Hey, no asterisk here. We're playing all our games and on time. So you can't put an asterisk like, yeah, you can. You're making a team play with no quarterbacks. They had to elevate a wide receiver from Wake Forest from a practice squad to play. The guy had more. He had one completion and two interceptions. That's like, that's not even a real game. Like, who the fuck cares if you add weeks in the end of February? Like, if the Super Bowl was played in March, do you really care? Is the Super Bowl going to be like, we remember it with fans and parties and all that shit? No. So play it in March, move, get three bye weeks or

whatever, put these games where they belong. And I don't, I don't get why they're rushing all this garbage. I actually get why they're doing it. And I'm not defending it, but I get it. I think once, once they open the Pandora's box and take care of it, then it's like, where do you stop? Where do you draw the line? The way they're doing it now is just like, eh, sorry. I would draw the line at four quarterbacks being out and forcing another guy that never played the position to do it. Or who threw eight touchdowns and seven interceptions in college to play.

I don't know. Did you watch the beginning of that game? Because the first couple of plays was kind of fun, right? You're like, oh, man. All right. Well, that's the thing. I did watch. Maybe that's the thing.

They got more eyeballs on that than they maybe normally would have. But not after 20 minutes. Right. 20 minutes in, you go, oh, I now see why a quarterback happens to be important. Yeah. And in a way, I was saying that. You kind of need one of those. It's kind of cool.

It's not like the movie version of this where the kid comes out and throws four touchdowns. It showed how hard this sport is. So it's like, all right, at least that put things in perspective. But I feel like I had that perspective already. I didn't even see it. Well, the best thing about it was, it definitely was whatever the replacements for 2020 would be

with Keanu Reeves right where you have like this practice squad guy it's his last chance and he used to play QB in college but maybe he had like a broken shoulder and never panned out they moved the receiver this is his one chance to come back Michael B Jordan is the is the QB gets thrown in throws for four TDs he becomes like a Willie Beeman kind of arc. Now, whatever happened today with Kendall, whatever his name is. What was his last name? It was Kendall Hinton.

Hinton, right. Take a Hinton. It was the opposite. We had in our keeper league, Connor picked him up for $4 and started him at receiver and got minus points. He got a minus 2.65 was extraordinary. Like three yards per dollar. I think,

right. Honestly, the dumbest thing I've ever seen on a Sunday. I'm not even mad. I, there was a time in my life where I would get furious and rant and rave, but this is just so abjectly stupid that I, And on top of it, they're running these COVID commercials. The NFL is like, wants you to be safe.

They're in holidays with COVID. It's like, you guys don't give a shit about anybody. You don't care about human beings. Right, of course not. You don't care about one person who works for your league. That one. They're going to plow through. We haven't missed a game.

Haven't missed a week. Don't have to add a week. They are so proud of it. I think every human being has to draw the line in this stuff. And it's like, if you're watching it, you're talking about it, you're betting it, you're doing the fantasy, we're all complicit. I'm not doing the whole ear than that thing. I watched football for 10 hours today like I always did.

It's not like, oh, man, I'm disgusted. I'm out. I still watched it. I'm as bad as everybody else. No, you're worse. You're worse than everybody else. I'm slightly worse. No, I'm bad too. But else. No, you're worse. You're worse than everybody else. Slightly worse. No, I'm bad too.

But my takeaway from this weekend, and I feel like three weeks of sports went on since we last talked on last Sunday between golf and boxing, and I'm sure we'll get to it. But my takeaway from this weekend was, A, it's going to be really hard to get through the rest of the year.

And B, what the hell does it matter? The Chiefs are so much better than everybody. And they're not even the undefeated team. The Steelers, I'm included. I'm disrespecting the Steelers by saying the Chiefs are way better. They just are. You got to catch them on a really weird day

to beat that team. Don't you think, I was thinking about Kaepernick and Tebow today. Two guys who could basically be guns for hire and just be available for the next time a Denver situation like this happens. Kaepernick should have been on a plane in two hours. I don't know if they could have added him to the roster

that late, but he could just be this hired gun that goes from team to team every time their quarterbacks get demolished. What did that line go from five and a half to 17? Yeah, I saw it as high as 17. Yep. So Drew Locke to a guy from the practice squad is worth 12.5 points.

What was the final score of that game? New Orleans won by... Final score was 31-3. So they won by 28. That wasn't enough. They weren't even really playing that well either. That game was ridiculous. Well, sorry about the over 10 and a half,

but it was looking like at one point you were... They kicked that field goal. That was insanity. I lost every bet I did except for the teasers. That was a bad way to score. I have my bet against the teams that are tanking for Trevor Lawrence tees. The first one I unveiled. That was the only one that hit.

Right, right, right. Yeah. The Cleveland and Miami. Well, so we had that. And then we had the whole Baltimore saga, which ruined our Thanksgiving night. We didn't get our Thanksgiving night game. That sucked. And then now it's getting pushed to Tuesday.

It's holding every fantasy league hostage. I mean, granted, there are worse problems to have in life, but. Yeah. But it's like they could end up, that game could just get postponed. And then these people have, there's never been this much fantasy chaos. I don't think ever. Right. Well, and it killed the Thursday game too, which I have a vested interest in it, which

is going to be the Ravens Cowboys. And now that's moved to next Monday night, which is like two o'clock Pacific time. Who the hell's going to be watching then? But yeah, everything's thrown out of whack. Now the Ravens are the bad guys before the Titans were the bad guys. And I guess now Denver quarterbacks are on the shit list too.

Well, one other subplot today was the gambling public pretty much got crushed today. Yeah. This was a demolition. We talked about the watch out that game looks too easy game. There are a few of those today. By the way, you try to solicit a name for that, the too easy game.

I got a lot of people said it's the Stormy Daniels game. Looks easy but isn't. But that but isn't part. We need work, right? I'm not sure. It looks easy. I get it. No offense to Stormy.

I met her. She's a very nice woman. But I don't know. She was on Kimmel one night. The Stormy Daniels game. The Stormy Daniels game. Well, I asked our friends at FanDuel, was there some one-sided action today? Mm-hmm.

The answer was yes. The Giants, they had a 91% handle and 90% of the bets on that game were on the Giants. The Browns were 84% and 82%. Cardinals were 76% and then 87%

of the bets. Raiders were 74% and 82% and the Rams were 70% and 78%. By my calculations, none of those five teams covered. That's how I remember it from viewing.

Yeah, too. In fact, the Raiders did not have a chance. A couple of them won on teasers, though, right? If you had the Giants and Cleveland on a teaser, you won. Giants finally won a close one. If you tease the Giants, get professional help.

You don't like that, right? No, it just immediately enters some sort of rehab place. So this goes back to a theory I've had that I might just have to try one of these years. Cause I don't know if people listening even fully understand, but we're not very good at gambling. We understand it. We can speak the language where we're, where you have our ups and downs. And that's about as kind as we can say. The move is to just take home underdogs or underdogs every week and then just look at where the money is

and go the opposite. And there were some 84%, 16% action. Just even if it doesn't feel right, even if you're like, wow, that's crazy. I can't believe. Why would anyone take that team? That's usually the team you should take.

And I just, one of these years, I'm just going to do that. It's yeah, it's good. And it comes out in the end. Well, first of all, this is one of the top three out of the last 20 years for underdogs. And specifically, I think home underdogs, they were nine and four, I guess, nine and five after tonight's game this week.

But you got to change your whole viewing habit though, right? If you're taking underdogs, you're most likely rooting for a shithead like Ryan Finley to throw a touchdown in the fourth quarter, right? You're going to root for bad quarterbacks almost all the whole day. So I don't know. You can't get excited if Mahomes throws a touchdown pass. It was Mahomes Brady today, but if there's a mismatch in quarterback play, you're going to be on the bad side of it.

Yeah, you're rooting for bad quarterbacks like Ryan Finley, Trubisky, Tom Brady. Oh, no. You love it. That world, you came behind him. Holy shit, you are. Yeah. Seven and five?

Yeah, we fucking... No, they're six and five. No, they have 12 are. Yeah. Seven and five? Yeah, we fucking, no, they're six and five. No, they have 12, they have 12 wins. 12 games. Are they seven and five? Yeah, they're in Carolina and only two teams with 12.

Oh, so we're five and six, so we're a game and a half back. Yeah. Yeah. I just want to catch the bucks. I don't even care if, I don't even care if we make the playoffs. I just want to catch the bucks.

Yeah, the, if I had to say the, the two easy game, because even Cardinals-Pats, which I think most people like the Cardinals, there's still that kind of bell check at home. We crossed them off. You made us cross them off.

That's the only reason I thought it was too easy. But go ahead. What were you going to say? Raiders-Falcons, I think, was the too easy game. Raiders were great last week. Julio gets scratched an hour before the game. The Falcons are just hot garbage. Yeah.

And it's like, oh oh man, the Raiders. Why? I mean, only three. What? And they got demolished and car looked like the car that we made fun of for years and years. And now when you look at the, uh, the playoff picture, they free fall now they're way back there.

They're in Cleveland's kind of in the driver's seat, in the five seat at eight and three. They play both New York teams. They're probably going to end up with at least 10 wins. But that was a devastating one for Vegas. Well, again, I was like, yeah, and you're right. That was the biggest surprise because, what, 43 to six? And Atlanta dropped a touchdown, too. It probably could have been worse.

But you think after what they did to Kansas City, and this probably worked against them. They just have nothing in the tank, right? What more could they do to win, to beat Kansas City? Now they have to go to pitiful Atlanta indoors and Carr and Jacobs, who eventually got hurt, couldn't get anything going. Like, really, not one thing going on that team. But, yeah, again, my takeaway was these teams that I liked,

like the Colts and the Raiders and I don't know, who else, like Arizona, who we liked all year. I'm like, that doesn't matter.

The Chiefs are so much better than these teams. I get that it's single elimination, but what are we rooting for here? I got, this was my first really bad gambling week

where not only did I lose the games, but the teams got killed. Like Vegas got murdered. I had the Bucks plus three that I jumped on to try to chase. And they ended up pushing. I think just because so many people had bet on the Chiefs. But that was like a moral victory.

The tough one was the Chargers one, which we'll get into later. The Chiefs had 17 after the first quarter and they were held to 27. That's kind of weird. I will say that. They are having trouble closing out games, but they do feel like, it feels like they just go through the motions

offensively and could do any one of four things each play. Let's take a break because I want to talk about that Chiefs game. This episode is brought to you by Movember. The mustache is back with a vengeance. Look at Travis Kelsey. Before he rocked that Super Bowl ring, he rocked that super soup strainer. Grow a mustache for Movember. You'll do great things too. You won't win the Super Bowl, but your fundraising will support mental health, suicide prevention, and prostate

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that the Chiefs were way better than everybody else. Mm-hmm. The Tyreek Hill thing got really exciting there. Where it seemed I love when Flipper Anderson Flipper Anderson, Flipper Anderson, one of the best 200 receivers you've ever seen.

Probably not. Right. Pretty nondescript. Like who, who is his, who's his doppelganger now for 2020? Like Curtis Samuel. I don't even know. He ran through the tunnel.

That's what I remember. But against the giants. Yeah. Maybe he was slightly better than I remember, but yeah. Flipper Anderson's the big winner. Every time somebody lights it up for two and a half quarters, they were just like, Oh man, Flipper Anderson, three 36. Yeah, maybe he was slightly better than I remember, but Flipper Anderson's the big winner every time somebody lights it up for two and a half quarters. They're just like, oh man, Flipper

Anderson, 336. Oh, he's the right guy. And they always mention it, but one other thing, I was texting with Matthew Barry where Hill had 50.1 fantasy points like halfway through the third quarter. Jesus. And I

remember doing this in a column a million years ago. And then I remember Barry and I remember it almost like you have these fantasy deja vu where like Barry and I probably texted about this in 2008, but I can't remember what it was. So anyway, he dug it up.

He dug up the 18 guys. It's the 55 club for fantasy. 18 guys have had 55 fantasy points for traditional scoring. So the highest ever was Billy Cannon. Yeah, Billy Cannon.

68 points. He had a 68-point game. Jerry Rice was second. There were three fantasy leagues with Billy Cannon. No, there were no fantasy. But just like if you go through the stats and it's like who had the highest gotcha okay Jerry Rice had a 65.5

four guys have been over 60 and 18 total have been over 55 are they mostly wide receivers do you have the list with you yeah so it's I'll just go quick Billy Cannon

Jerry Rice Jimmy Smith Jerry Butler Jerry Rice again Jamal Charles Steve Largent Art Powell Gail Se Clinton Portis, Kellen Winslow, Abner Haynes, Sean Alexander, LaDainian Thomas, and Jim Brown, Priest Holmes, Chris Johnson, and Doug Martin. Remember the famous Doug Martin, 55.2? Oh, yeah.

So Tyreek did not join the 55 club. Oh, man. What does he have to do? Jerry Rice is our only two-timer. Proving yet again, Jerry Rice was the best wide receiver of all time. Yeah. But Tyreek, it always drives me crazy. It's like when a basketball player has 60 and they take the guy out.

Yeah. The Chiefs were winning that game. Get Tyreek the record. Get him to 350. Right. What are you doing? He had 260 yards. He had a quarter and a half left. 269,

13 receptions. Yeah, they didn't do anything really offensively. That's what I mean. I don't even know if they care half the time. I see, I don't know if I brought up last year, but when Kelsey is in motion, he's just jogging. It's so obnoxious the way he's jogging in motion and Mahomes

and these double reverses that end up being passes and like, oh, well. And by the way, they kicked a field goal from the, from the one yard line, the half yard line. Like, I don't know. It's almost like they're just trying to challenge themselves. Us not betting on Mahomes to win the MVP like three weeks ago is, is my worst moment in 2020 from a gambling standpoint. So is he at 30 and 2?

He's 30 touchdowns, 2 interceptions, 3,500 yards. He's so far ahead of whoever the second guy is. It's like, it's fucking over. I'm with you. I think he could play two or three more games and be okay. He wouldn't even have to finish the season. It was fun hearing Romo announce his game and just get fired up like five or six times just because

the guy's so freaking good. And then the other thing is when you watch Mahomes in the late games, this is after the 10 early games where most of the quarterbacks are horrific. Yeah, really bad. Like Cam Newton can't even get to 100 yards. You went down the line and then this guy comes in the late games

and he's just perfect. He's doing everything great. He's got a cannon. He can run from first downs whenever he wants. It's like, oh, that's how you're supposed to be a quarterback. Well, there are two quarterbacks with under 100 yard passing that won today. I think Cam was one. Who was the other one? I can't remember. Well, it was

Taysom Hill. Oh, Taysom Hill. Right. That makes sense. Cam was terrible. And I don't know how the Pats won. And we crossed the Pats off last week. And meanwhile, they definitely have a chance to make the playoffs. What do we do? We have to keep them crossed off.

Yeah, we have to keep them crossed off. Hope not to eat crow here. Yeah, that was bad. The Chiefs, I'm with you. If you just, I don't care that Pittsburgh is probably going to have home field. I don't think home field is necessarily even going to matter, but you don't want to play the Chiefs. Are you kidding me?

They're the clear, clear, clear favorite right now. Chiefs, Colts, Chiefs, Browns, Chiefs. I get it. One game. It only takes one game, but they're just going to plow through these teams. And I was thinking for Brady, is there something like, I know we want to laugh at him. Is there something with that stadium?

He has nine interceptions at home. And we know what Jameis did last year. He has nine picks in Tampa Bay. Maybe there's a weird mystique. Remember how you couldn't kick a field goal in Pittsburgh for the longest time for some reason? I don't know. You think the stadium's haunted?

That's what you're going with? I think so. Tom Brady being 43 years old and repeatedly not being on the same page with any receiver? Jameis wasn't 43. He didn't have good vision, but he wasn't 43.

Over 5,000 yards. Near the end, Romo said, Jim, I think we could see these two in Tampa in February. I know. I saw that. And did this whole thing. He's like, I saw some things that game.

I think they figured some stuff out. Asset, and they're like, I watched that whole game. I don't think they figured anything out. Gronk can't be the leading receiver yardage-wise, right? He can't. Not with those weapons. I know Evans had two touchdowns, but Gronk had 90 yards, and he was the tops, I think, on the team.

I'm trying to remember an unhappier team as we headed into December who actually then ended up winning the Super Bowl. Usually by now you have a little momentum, right? And they have a buy, right? So if you think about it, I don't know if you've thought about this, but is it now all of a sudden as bad as the NFC East is,

whoever has to play that winner, if you look at it from a gambling point of view, that line is shrinking a little bit. Oh, yeah. I don't think it's more than a touchdown if the Rams go to or Seattle goes to Philly, Washington, whatever, or Tampa Bay. Same kind of thing. I think it's all of a sudden closer. Wildcard team should definitely win.

That was going to be our next segment. NFC East watch. same kind of thing. I think, I think it's all of a sudden closer. Wildcard team should definitely win, but I, that was going to be our next segment. NFC Eastwatch. I had the G man with seven exclamation points in a four and seven tie with Washington. Good. And, uh, yeah,

I mean, listen, I know a few giants fans, you know, a few giants fans. Who's, who's your closest friend? Who's a giants friend?

Well, Harry was a giants fan for many, many years. Now he lives in Arizona, so he stalks Cliff Kingsbury, but if it's Harry, yeah. What about Crazy Brad? Oh, Brad. Yeah, yeah. Oh, for sure, Brad. Yeah. Let me tell you something. Yeah. And I haven't talked to all the Giants fans I know about this, but

I know Giants fans. I know them. I know how they're wired. They want the Bucs. Oh, yeah. They want that four or five Bucs matchup with Brady. And if that happens and they beat Brady and knock him out of the playoffs, that will be like the third Super Bowl for them. For sure.

With Danny Jones, a six and 10 Giants team as 10-point favorites. Fuck you, Giants fans. I know you're thinking it. You can all fuck off right now. I know you're thinking it. You can all fuck off right now. I know you're thinking it. And the thing that scares me and bothers me is I would be rooting for the Giants in that game.

You would, right? Oh yeah. Said that that'd be a game I couldn't root for anybody. I know. I hate that. Oh, that's an Iran Iraq game. Yes, exactly. Please, please.

Can we cross off the Cowboys? I know it was days ago. We're not doing it. No. Oh, for God's sake, Simmons. This, please can we cross off the Cowboys? I know it was days ago. No, we're not doing it. Oh, for God's sake, Simmons. This is stupid already. Enough. They're in the hospital bed with all the tubes in. I'm not doing it.

I'm not pulling the puck. I've thought about that play all weekend. I should not be thinking about a fourth and 10 with 12 minutes left or whatever, down four, and they go from it from their own 20. And the way that handoff was taken by Wilson in the backfield, he needed 24 yards to run. Are you talking about the worst, the worst fake pun of all time? I hated it. I freaking hated it.

I was trying to think what could have happened where that play worked because by the time they finished the handoff and he started his run, even if they had faked out the defense, they were not faked out. Right. Exactly. Yeah. If you're straight up the gut, that may work with a faked out defense. When you give them seven seconds to adjust, it doesn't happen. And the worst part of this for me as a Cowboy fan, like, oh, it wasn't Jason Garrett after all. It's like, okay, he's in charge of the Giants offense, which is 15th in the NFC. Like everyone calm the fuck down. Yeah.

So pissed off about this whole season. I'm buying NFC East stock. Oh, for the playoffs? Nah, just in general. Jalen Hurts supposedly is going to be playing tomorrow night. That'll be fun. I don't know.

Giants have been frisky for like five weeks. Yeah, but it's McCoy now. I mean, that hamstring doesn't look good for Danny Dimes. So it could be Hurts, McCoy, Dalton, and Alex Smith could be the NFC East quarterbacks. It's beautiful. I got to be honest.

I didn't watch one second of Giants-Bengals. Yeah. Well, they won a close one. It popped on Red Zone a couple times, and I was like, oh. Bengals turned it over in a minute left, had a chance to kick a field goal to win, but the Giants have lost

a lot of close ones, so give them one. That's fine. One other goofy thing happened. The NFC West, which we thought was a potential juggernaut, has really fallen apart, and we have Seattle playing tomorrow night. They're seven and three. We've got the Rams

at seven and four, which, and it was a stay away. I stayed away. Yeah. Jared, it was a classic. Jared Goff hasn't played

like complete shit in a while. He's due. Yeah. And then it happened. It was bad. I mean, maybe you just stay away from every NFC West game

because the 49ers are the best last place team in all of football, right? Right. Well, they certainly seem like, yeah, they seem like the best coach, best run, best overcoming adversity team. Every game they have 14 guys on the IR. Yeah, I think they had like 11 or 12 guys. Yeah, you're right.

So they're going to play tough, but that doesn't, you're probably going to go to Arizona next. That doesn't excuse their poor performance. They're 6-5, and they have two Rams games left. So there's some loser-leaves-town potential with that all of a sudden. Although, who knows? The NFC is so bad, maybe everybody makes it.

And then San Francisco, even though we kind of wrote them off, I don't think they're out of it yet. I know, but what? They're 5-6? So do they play in San Diego? Like, they can't even go home. Like, this city that they've been suing forever said,

okay, we're shutting down, at least for three weeks. They have to be gone for three weeks, but then they have to quarantine to come back. So they're not going to see Santa Clara, where their stadium is, for five or six weeks. That's a whole other disaster that's thrown Shanahan's way. Yeah, he's coach of the year potential. He really is.

Nobody's overcome more stuff. Yeah. Two coaches who won't be coach of the year. Yeah. Cliff Kingsbury, Anthony Lynn. Anthony Lynn, we'll start with him. Eight and 19 in his last 27 games. Of those 19 losses,

I feel like they probably could have won 15 or 16 of them. He, the whole game was terrible. They did something right before halftime where they had the ball on their own 45. And I was texting you in-house about it. They called timeout on fourth and two. And then they punted.

And I was just sitting there, I was trying to figure it out. And it almost broke my brain because you would think like, don't call timeout, let it run down to three seconds and then just try a Hail Mary. Right. What's the point of punting? The punt could get blocked. They could return it for what? I can't think of a single good thing that outcome of calling a timeout. So then you can punt. Punt. Right.

So that was weird. He was already on my radar as like, that's the dumbest thing I've seen today. And then they had already lost. Oh, you're going to talk about the rest of the game. I mean, they complete a Hail Mary. They're down 10. Yeah. For incredible play by Herbert, who had a lot of bad luck.

I thought today, um, guy gets tackled on the two. They raced down to down the ball. We think like 28 seconds left and they called like a run play and the guy didn't score. And now it's like, and then they had to throw it away. And now there's nine seconds left.

And I I've never heard the announcers kill a coach as bad as the announcers killed Anthony Lynn on the telecast. Yeah. And he forgot for three minutes before he could a coach as bad as the announcers killed Anthony Lynn on the telecast. Yeah. And he forgot for three minutes. Before he could have cut the lead to seven, but went for it on fourth down and kept it at 10. They got busted.

But then, yeah, with less than a minute left, they really didn't have a chance. It was just fun to watch this unravel the way it did. I know I want to like him and I want to like his decisions. But Matt Patricia must be like, why don't I have a job? What the hell's going on? Right. Well, they could have had the cover,

which was the funniest part of it. Yeah. Right. Right. Cause you figure like you down it, you score there's 28 seconds. So if you get the onsite, it was really bad.

And I have a feeling he might not last a week. That might've been the final. Oh really? You think so? Yeah. I think that there's been too many of those for that team now at this point. Oof.

I just think there's so much goodwill with the COVID and his speech and his hard knock speech and everything. I thought it would last him the year, but these losses are more and more perplexing. So maybe you're right. Listen, if you want somebody who's well-spoken and inspirational, like fucking hire Morgan Freeman for the last four weeks.

That'd be good. At least try that. The other one who's terrible was Kingsbury, who we called this out a few weeks ago. We said this was the flaw in the Arizona ointment, was their coach does dumb ass stuff and blows games for them. And he did it with the Miami game a couple of weeks ago. Did you say the flaw in the ointment or the fly in the ointment?

I said the flaw in the ointment, but I really meant the fly in the ointment. Okay. And the flaw in the ointment. There's so much in this ointment we got to dig out. Yeah. He, I thought, was the reason the Patriots won the game today. Yeah. Well, their offense is kind of predictable, right?

I'm not saying they need to throw a Hail Mary to New Hopkins every game, but he can't is kind of predictable, right? Like I'm not saying they need to throw a hell Mary to new Hopkins every game, but he can't be four for 51, right. Or four for 55, but whatever he ended up being, he has to figure into that offense. And if he doesn't Murray can't run for 31 yards, you know, otherwise they're just a pedestrian team. And, uh, and your team beat him up, of course, a little cheating down the stretch with some referees helping you out. Numbers-wise, it doesn't add up with Cam's, how

he did it. I don't know what to say. Harris, what was he, 14 for 47? How did you win that game? I'm still not sure how you won that game. I have no idea how we won. We got a goal line stand when they ran some terrible plays and the big play of the game was in the final five minutes. They had the third and two.

Yeah. I'm just sitting there, you know, you're thinking like, all right, please don't roll Kyler out. That'll get three yards. And it's just like they did this straight terrible handoff right in the middle. They don't get it. Yeah.

They have to punt. And then, you know, Cam got taken off the hook a bunch of times. I am on a couple Pats fan threads. And Nikhil Harry has now surpassed Sonny Michelle as the punching bag on the threads. He had one of the worst.

I can't even really identify a single thing that he did. Every single time he was involved in anything. It was a worst case scenario. And my buddy Jay Buck thinks he should put on 30 pounds over the off season and they should turn him into a tight end. That's the only way it's going to work. I thought it was actually a good theory because he's so slow. Anyway, you might as well, might as well make up a tight end. Yeah. And everyone goes crazy about Jacoby Myers, right? Like this guy is like like, that alone should motivate him

to probably quit football. It's really rough to spend first-rounders on a back and a receiver back-to-back, and they're not good. But the Kingsbury thing, he's cost them two games now at least. And from a game management standpoint, it just feels like watching from home, we're more competent than he is, which is not a good sign for them.

Yeah, because you have, I mean, he's, he's, uh, out of his element in that division. Right. Because McVay,

we know is good and we know Shanahan is good. And which team am I forgetting? Well, Pete Carroll has the pedigree and everything, but yeah. Um, yeah, he's on the outside looking at it.

Hmm. All right. We're going to take a break. We're going to do a little on Jones Tyson and then we'll do a guest lines. All right. So Saturday night, um, one of the weirdest sporting events I've ever watched the Jones Tyson pay-per-view where it came out today. Mike Tyson said he's just smoked pot before the fight. I think that might have been a first. Mario Lopez as our host. Jim Gray was the interviewer. Sugar Ray Leonard was one of the judges. They had Jones and Tyson.

And it seemed like the entire goal was to fool us into thinking it was like 2001. But then Roy Jones came out. He had boobs. He was completely exhausted after two two-minute rounds. And I don't think he landed like a scary, decent, any kind of punch for the last five rounds and somebody was a draw.

And Vinny Pazienza was one of the judges. And I think he fought Roy Jones, right? So was his mission like, I got to, all right, I lost to Jones. I got to make it like that was, I did well. I don't know. In the back, yeah, you're right. He won either all eight rounds or six out of the eight rounds.

And they called it a draw. And it drove me crazy because Tyson, like they like Jim Gray's like, okay, you okay with that decision? He's like, I really am. I'm okay with that. This is like, what, Mike? I get that you've grown as a person and I get that you're probably stoned right now, but we need the old Mike Tyson where he's throwing chairs around and beating up like cameramen and ring girls are running for their lives here. How are you okay

with a draw? A and B, how are we betting on this stuff? I stayed away. Our friend House had Tyson. House had Tyson. House and I also had nate robinson i'm sure we'll get to that that's great good i i had freaking i had i had curry and manning over i like they gotta do it they can't say we used to get mad that like why aren't they putting these bet up why can't we bet on these things like you can't sanction this shit anymore the rules are too crooked everything's too crooked about it boxing's crooked. And then you give us a draw when a guy won all eight rounds. Outrageous. Well, they were doing the live, whatever the live odds were round by round and heading into like the seventh round, Tyson was a 33 to one favorite, but they were showing the judges and Christy

Martin was the only one who had it normal. Then there was, who was the other boxer, not Pazienza? Chad Dawson. Oh, Chad Dawson. Yeah. So heading into the last two rounds, he only had Jones down by two. Come on. And Tyson was 33 to one. And I'm thinking like, oh my God, this is going to, and I

texted you guys, this is going to be a draw. And then seventh, eighth rounds, he gives to Roy Jones. Roy Jones couldn't fucking stand up. He couldn't breathe. He was like heaving. Yeah. And he was like delirious at the end of the fight.

They interviewed him. He's like, it's all about Pensacola, man. Pensacola. Shout out to Pensacola, man. And he was just like a babbling idiot. You know what they should do? Whenever there's a draw, they should do just how they had it set up. Jim Gray should interview. He's like, okay, I'm going to

interview both of you for a minute. Whoever is most coherent wins the match. Right. It would have been Tyson. Oh, it would have been a slaughter worse than the 8-0 in rounds. He wasn't making any sense, Roy Jones. Here's the thing. Tyson looked pretty good. Yeah. Roy Jones looked like

he should never be allowed to box ever um and it was funny hearing the announcers like oh Roy Jones yeah oh the know-how right come on right Roy Jones is washed up seven years ago but Tyson actually I don't know I would like to see him try to fight a real person I I have to say, I was thinking about it for this podcast. I was thinking like, you know, our fathers grew up with Muhammad Ali, and he was obviously a great social justice warrior. And he had the more memorable matches with Frazier and Foreman and everything, obviously. And we grew up with Tyson.

And I'm glad we grew up with Tyson. I really am. I think he's the most ferocious fighter of all time there was a certain excitement I've seen a lot of or most of Ali's matches and I guess it's different but I didn't get the sense of like something crazy could really

happen short of biting someone's ears off like we got excited even for the shitty Tyson fights right like Tillman and Saturday Night yeah right exactly of biting someone's ears off. We got excited even for the shitty Tyson fights, right? Yeah. Tillman and- Like Saturday night. Yeah, right. Exactly. But then we had, okay, that was pre-prison.

Then post-prison, that was razor-ruttic. And then there was a crappy Peter McNeely stuff. Now I think we're getting a third round of Tyson. I don't think he's not done, right? I think he said he's not done. I don't know who we see him fight. Bernard Hopkins is 55. I don't know. we see him fight. Like Bernard Hopkins is 55. I don't know.

Weight wise. He's probably like, probably only still like one 45, but we could see like three more Tyson fights. I'm excited. I texted you and Jimmy before the Tyson got interviewed for the fight. And I texted you guys and just said, I just take,

I take, I take Tyson for granted sometimes that he's the unintentionally funniest person of my lifetime. The best. And every time he's talking extemporaneously for five minutes, there's seven laughs. Yeah, yeah. And he's so goddamn likable too. But I hope he comes back.

I saw enough power and enough, I don't know, hand speed from him that I think it's realistic. I really do. Now, I don't know if, could he stop being punched? I don't know, hand speed from him that I think it's realistic. I really do. Now, I don't know if, could he stop being punched? I don't know. Like if there was somebody who was just circling him, just jabbing him for 12 rounds, that probably wouldn't go well. But could he fight some 38-year-old bruiser and beat the guy? Like, yeah, I think he could.

No, yeah. No, I'd rather see more of like the Roy Jones. I don't even know who I'm thinking of here. I should have thought. Like who would be even. Larry Holmes, is he still alive? He's too he's too old. I think he was older than Tyson. One thing I was thinking with Jake Paul is if Jake Paul

if he was basically like I am the celebrity champion in the world. Yeah. And any other celebrity come at me. I have the belt. He makes the belt. He comes out. I'm the celebrity champ. He basically is doing all that. Yeah. Yeah. So then somebody's like, Oh, you think you're the celebrity champ and maybe like the celebrity champ could be thing. I think Jake Paul's pretty good. He would do it. I think he's talked about McGregor and all that shit,

all those guys, but he is pretty good. People get mad. The Paul's are decent boxers. Yeah. Not bad. And basketball players are not great fighters is the other thing we knew. And Nate Robinson was out of his element and, you know, whatever. It's a couple hundred bucks that I'll never see again, but Oh my God, he got really,

he got slaughtered. You knew when he was up, we don't want the refs like, Hey, give me your gloves. If you want to keep fighting, give me your gloves. He's like,

Oh, all right. And like, Oh, bad move, bad move, dude. Just stay on one knee. It did seem like he got like, all right. And I'm like, oh, bad move. Bad move, dude.

Just stay on one knee. It did seem like he got rabbit punched. Oh, and the first one? The first knockdown felt like that was the back of the head. The other great thing was at one point,

Mauro Ranallo was killing time with Snoop Dogg, Sugar Ray Leonard, and Israel, whatever his name is. Yeah. And it was just,

you could hear the producers be like, Mauro, you took him five more minutes. Yeah. And it was just you could hear the producers be like, it took him five more minutes. And he was just like, and Snoop Dogg, you're a big fan of and it was just this ad-lib extravaganza that I really enjoyed. Snoop, you ever hear of secondhand smoke? And Snoop

was great. I'll tell you one thing, I want him on every fight. Don't you want Snoop like, right? Snoop is good. I'll tell you one thing. I want him on every fight. Don't you want Snoop? Snoop is good. The rule they broke was they had four guys announcing the fight. Yeah, and they had to give them all a shot. Four guys doing play-by-play has never worked ever in the history of sports. But if it had just been Snoop and Mauro Ranallo, I think I would have been all in.

What else do we need? Yeah, Snoop was a big winner. It felt like a lot of people ordered that fight. Certainly all the people we knew got it, right? Yeah, I didn't see the numbers on it. But yeah, he's still a spectacle, Tyson. He really is. Roy Jones is popular too.

I loved Roy Jones back in the day, right? Yeah. You didn't love him? No? I didn't like him as much as some others because I felt like he hung on a little too long. Well, if you did, like Roy only retired, what, three years ago? And you were sending me some videos of his last few fights,

which were atrocious. I mean, when he gets knocked out, it's brutal. It's Nate Robinson-esque. But just the fact that he fought three years ago makes you think he would be more in shape for this or more ready, or maybe just Tyson's just tough to tough to hit. Who do you think was the biggest winner of the day? Snoop.

Great. I think Snoop and whatever Triller is. Cause I didn't know what the hell. Oh yeah. What is that? Yeah. I don't know. It was whoever sponsored that fight.

Marijuana wins to whatever whatever ad they were pimping the whole time. Well, then they got Jim Gray and Michael Buffer. Yeah. They really made every effort they could to.

I'm I'm down for the celebrity championship. They could do that once a month. I'd be in. Yeah. All right. We're going to take a

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Or visit 1800gambler.net in West Virginia. All right. No Thursday game. No. Kind of a bummer. It is. Two Monday games. What are the lines

For the Monday Tuesday game So we got Seattle Phillies Still Seattle five and a half Yeah it's five and a half And The Tuesday game And Baltimore Pittsburgh is what

Well it was three When we guessed it last week And now it's ten Now it's a full ten Okay So Sunday marquee game. I'm just doing this for the comedy. Titans-Browns.

Derrick Henry is climbing up the MVP charts. He's certainly on the short list of if you bet on the other team and Derrick Henry's doing his thing, you kind of feel helpless. You're like, fuck. That's it. Shut the screen. Yeah. I can't believe I'm on the other team and Derrick Henry's doing his thing, you kind of feel helpless. That's it. Shut the screen.

I can't believe I'm on the other side of this guy. I was on the other side of that guy and my only saving grace is like, well, this is going to be first of all, it was before they became the COVID Colts and they had four starters, ironically against the Titans, the biggest dirtiest team in the league.

They had four defensive starters out. Then they had a center out. They had Jonathan Taylor out. The line still stayed at three. And I was like, okay, it's indoors. It won't be cold. They won't have as tough a time tackling Derrick Henry. And I was way wrong.

It's a terrible combination where if the Titans are up, you feel helpless because they can just ram the ball with him. And if you have the Colts and they're behind, you have Phil Rivers. And once he's down 10,

you just give up. Right. He's not going to work. He's just not coming back. Titans-Browns, it's in Tennessee. I have the Titans by five and a half.

That's exactly what I had. And I stand by it. Now they're making this four. That's a weak line. I'm not buying this Cleveland thing. Still not buying it. Every game is the same. It's cold.

They play a shitty team. They pull it out at the end. Nick Chubb runs for something and then ends up having... What did he have? I mean, they're a a team with 19 for 144. No Garrett today. Denzel Ward didn't play. This was like, today was the game that the Browns should have lost because they're the Browns.

It's like, oh my God, they lost to Jacksonville and they actually won it. Do you think they get to 10 wins? I was looking at that. You do. Do you see? The Garrett, they're a different defense when Garrett's out there. Like if Garrett plays in this Tennessee game,

I think they have to be taken more seriously. He's one of the three best guys. Oh, for sure. Titans, Steelers, Ravens though on the schedule. Ravens team that's going to need to win. And then Giants, Jets. At both of those. One thing I've noticed today is,

you know I'm not a big Baker fan. I thought he was really good in the game today. More because Stefanski has just completely figured out how to use him and just put him in a position to succeed and that's it. But some of the rollout stuff, some of the play action stuff, I thought he was solid.

I think I'm tougher on him because he's in every single commercial. Yeah. It's like, all right, Baker, enough. You're playing the Jaguars. Why do I have to see you in this progressive ad 47 times? Don't worry. This is the last year for that.

Yeah. Next, we go to the watchables. I'm going to put Saints Falcons in the watchables instead of the barely watchables because the Saints have been on a little streak. Their games are always fun. Saints Falcons. Falcons. Look pretty goddamn good today. And,

uh, I have saints by four and a half at Atlanta. Uh, I think I get this. I said three, it's three and a half. Hmm. Yeah.

Listen, let's not bet Denver. Let's not bet Atlanta. Let's not bet the team's playing Denver. Let's not bet the team's playing Atlanta. Atlanta, let's not bet Denver. Let's not bet Atlanta. Let's not bet the teams playing Denver. Let's not bet the teams playing Atlanta. Atlanta's four and seven, and they're plus 14. Plus 14. Point differential?

Yeah. Four and seven. They easily could be six and five. Made up for lost time today. Plus 37 today. Yeah. I mean, they had 304 yards today and they

scored 43 points. Yeah. Colts. Gurley was one of those injuries where it's like, oh man, they don't have Todd Gurley. Right. And you go, okay. They might be better off with the next three guys on the depth chart.

Yeah. Next one is Colts-Texans. It's in Houston. Houston won two games in about 100 hours and kind of rejuvenated their season a tiny bit. They're not a playoff team. The Colts, depending on what week you catch them, they either look like

dog shit or they look like an AFC lead contender. I have the Colts by three in Houston. Yeah, that's what I had. Colts three. It's two and a half. So we both get that. Yeah, I was.

I mean, I got killed on Thanksgiving. Also, this is one of my worst gambling weeks in a while between the golf. Me too. Nate Robinson and the Thursday games and Sunday. But do you have a witness relocation program player? Like mine is Deshaun Watson. I want him off that Houston team. Oh, I like this.

I need him to go somewhere else. Right. Is there anyone else you think about when you think of like, well, we saw what he did with Houston. They're going to be the shakies game. They'll be the first round, the first Saturday game in the playoffs. They'll either win or lose. They're not going to go further than that.

He's got to get off that crap team and may even put him on a crappier team in the Bears, but I think he would be better with the Bears than he is with Houston or anyone good, obviously. So you're saying the Bears should trade like four first-round picks for him? Yeah, sure. Anything.

You know, I was thinking about that, why that hasn't happened in football yet. Because in basketball, the value of first-round picks has just completely gone haywire. The Davis trade, the Drew Holiday trade,

the Kawhi Paul George trade, and people, even Robert Covington goes for two first-round picks. Teams are very willing to trade first round picks now. And I wonder in the NFL that that bridge has not been crossed yet with one of these trades. Where the Bears just go into Houston, we'll give you five first round

picks for Deshaun Watson. What would be the number to make Houston go, oh shit, really? I mean, I guess it would be harder now because they signed him. You think it would be five? Yeah, the contract is something different. No, it would be harder now because they signed him. You think it would be five? Yeah, the contract is something different. No, it would be like two, right? For Deshaun Watson, I think it would be at least three.

Plus pick up the salary? Really? I don't know. Yeah. Well, basketball, here's the thing. You trade first-round picks, they're not necessarily starting on your team. Football, first-round pick is definitely meant to start on the team right away. Unless it's the Patriots. Yeah, that's true. But Deshaun's my witness relocation.

You should think of if there are any. And I have a few Cowboys that could leave, too, that would be better for them. But Deshaun's my guy. Well, for years, it was Larry Fitzgerald when he didn't have quarterbacks for all those years. But he made the Super Bowl. He almost won the Super Bowl.

No, I mean after that. Like after Kurt Warner retired when it was just Bowl. No, I mean after that. Yeah, right. Like after Kurt Warner retired when it was just like, oh man, Larry Fitz. Yeah, he just runs up the numbers, but can't win. Moss was a good one in the mid-2000s.

Oh, right. Before the Pats got him, when he was like stuck on those crap Raider teams. Yeah, Deshaun's a good one. I think that's the right pick. All right. Mitch Trubisky would be last. I stand by it. He's much better than Foles

He's definitely better than Foles I agree with that He completed an 18 yard pass That's it, that's all I need to see And he throws downfield Next one is a borderline loser leaves town match But it's not You could talk yourself into it

Cards Rams, It's in Arizona. Two teams that just love to, every time you're feeling good about them, just kick somebody in the nuts. I have the Cards by three and a half against the Rams. I had Cards by one. It's Rams by one and a half. Oh, wow. Yeah, see, this is what I mean.

They still love the Rams over there. I might stay away from this. Or they don't like the cards. Yeah. Well, the cards didn't cover against Seattle, right? I was way off on that one. They lost today. Rams lost today.

The Rams blew it. The Rams had the ball and up three. I mean, I thought for sure, like, all right, 49ers had their fun. But I don't know. I just thought those are games that McVay wins. But they couldn't score there. It's tough. Goff had a couple of the worst series of his career.

That wasn't open. Seahawks, Giants. I have this in the watchables just because of what's going on with the G-men and Russell Wilson. And this just feels like a game where you tease the Seahawks-Giants. I have this in the watchables just because of what's going on with the G-men and Russell Wilson. And this just feels like a game where you tease the Seahawks and with five minutes left, it's tied and you're sweating it out. Right. I have this Seahawks by eight.

I said nine and a half, and it's nine. Oh, good. Oh, I'm in good shape here. All right. Five to two. Keep it going. Yeah, I don't know. If it's Colt McCoy, it's not as exciting, right?

Yeah. In Seattle. I do like Colt McCoy. Next one is Chargers-Pats. This is in Los Angeles. A sad one for me. I was always excited for the L.A. game where the Pats came to town. Oh, yeah.

Could do a little Boston hang. All the jerseys. Nope. Not going to happen. Yeah, you could hang in a little Boston hang, all the jerseys. Nope, that can happen. Yeah, you could hang in the parking lot. I'm sure they'll let you in. I have the Chargers by three and a half. Oh, wow. I said one and a half,

and it's one. Kitchen sink game, right? For the Patriots. They're going to out-coach them. That's one element. It's true. It would have to be worth about 14 points to coach a matchup. Eckler being back,

I just thought, I couldn't believe the Chargers didn't get more points. You'd think they had so many weapons. The Bills had a good pass rush in that Chargers game. I was surprised. That was the best their front seven had looked that I can remember this season. I was surprised. That was the best their front seven had looked that I can remember this season. Herbert was under duress, but

still some dumb plays. If today's any example, didn't the Bills have, what'd they have, like 172 yards rushing or something? Barely watchable. I only have one in this one. Packers Eagles. We'll see how Jalen Hurts does tomorrow night. The Packers by seven and a half against the Eagles. You got that exactly. I only have one in this one. Packers Eagles. We'll see how Jalen Hurts does tomorrow night. The Packers by

seven and a half against the Eagles. You got that exactly. I said seven. All right. COVID corner. Steelers home for the Washington professional football team. Who the fuck knows? I have Steelers by 11 and a half.

I had 11. That's 10. Hmm. Yeah, that's have Steelers by 11 and a half? I had 11. That's 10. Yeah, that's that's what things should turn around, right? Although the Steelers will be playing on five days rest. So I hope that's not a stupid game. Just let the Steelers run. Washington with Gibson and McLaurin.

It's really hard for them to not be competitive. You saw it in that Thursday game. Those two guys, those guys play really, really's really hard for them to not be competitive. You saw it in that Thursday game. Those two guys, those guys play really, really effing hard. I didn't watch. I'll take your word for it. The poopfecta, we got four games. We'll go through them quickly. The Bears are home for the Lions.

Who's the new Lions coach? Did they pick a coach? You know, I didn't even check. Who is it? I don't think they picked the coach. No. Nobody wants it. I've not seen. you know I didn't even check who is it I don't think they picked the coach no nobody wants it I've not seen I knew like people didn't like

Patricia but boy oh boy there was like 10 like former players who verbally came out like on Twitter and like good riddance goodbye oh I guess it wasn't my fault it was like one after another like holy shit you don't see that it was tough well he came in He tried to do this

whole I'm bringing a new culture thing and did not go well from day one. I have the Bears by two and a half in this game. I hit this exactly. It's four. Jesus. How could anyone put the Bears by four over basically any team except the Jets

or the Jags? I don't know. I mean, the Bears have been getting killed week after week. Yeah. That's stupid. I'm with you. And yet I'll never take the Lions. I didn't change it after the Sunday game. Dolphins are home for the Bengals.

I have Dolphins by eight. I got beat up on this too. I said seven and a half. It's eleven and a half. So Tua's thumb is really messed up, huh? Yeah. Although that could actually help the Dolphins this year as a playoff team. Yeah. Yeah, I feel like Fitzpatrick is a more solid choice

when the line's 11 and a half for sure. Vikings-Jags, that's in Minnesota. Vikings won a ludicrous game today. I have no idea how Carolina blew it. Carolina, it seems like every other week it comes down to Joey Sly trying to make a really long field goal and somehow it's either missing or him shanking it.

Yeah, he kicked it further outdoors than he did, and straighter than he did against the Chiefs than he did in the Dome against the Vikings. Could they be tanking? I don't say. I heard a lot about tanking, but...

Panthers? Well, Sly would have to be on the payroll at this point. Vikings, I have by nine and a half over the Chiefs. Oh, you got it exactly. Shit. I had nine. Yeah, well, you got that Jeremyeremy chin two two touchdowns 13 tackles kept the panthers in that game jeremy double chin

the uh the vikings not out of it well if they didn't lose that dumb game to my suck squad there the cowboys they would have been right in there right otherwise like and they play tompa right i think is that the, Brady's got a bye that might be their first game back after the bye. They could clinch basically a playoff spot beating the Vikings there. So there's not much chasing them. If the Rams beat Arizona

and Minnesota beats Jacksonville, they would be in a tie for the seventh playoff spot. Wow. Really? That's all they need? Yeah. Yeah. They would be in a tie for the seventh playoff spot. Wow. Really? That's all they need? Yeah. We're not forgetting anyone? So Seattle,

the Rams would make it. No, it's New Orleans, Seattle, Green Bay, NFC East as your four top seeds. Then Tampa 7-4, Rams 7-4,

Arizona 6-5, Minnesota and Chicago are 5-6. No kidding. Yep. I guess that's it well um you talk about like offensive rookie of the year it's justin herbert and jefferson is making a move like he was he had another good uh game today two touchdowns yeah it's funny my son and i bought a bunch of football cards because he's really into football cards so it's like which cards do you protect in the really nice protector? Protect Justin Jefferson.

Yeah. Jefferson, Herbert, Tua, and Burrow. Those are like the top four. That's nice. Then there's a whole other level of like Clyde and Chase Young and Henry Ruggs, Jerry Judy, all those dudes. But Jefferson and the quarterbacks are the four best of them. Yeah, that's fun. He's really good. That was a great trade. That was one of my favorite trades in a while. Diggs for Jefferson, basically.

They were basically even going into today. And then I think Jefferson went ahead. Alright. Next game is Raiders-Jets. Our last poop-fecta game. It's at the Jets. Raiders, I have favored by seven.

Yeah, you're going to get this. I went way high. I mean, come on. Seven. It's seven and a half. How could anyone give anything less than 10 to the Jets? They're definitely going 0-16 here. They're so bad.

This tease won this week, and it's probably going to win again next week. What did we say? The Vikings line was Vikings is nine and a half. Yeah. So you do a seven point tease with the Vikings Raiders right now. And it's basically you're betting that those teams are going to continue to tank. It's a good bet.

The jets tease you like there'll be winning three, nothing or something. And then they absolutely don't show up for the second half or the second quarter or any of those quarters in between. Like, I don't get maybe there's weather or something. I don't know how the Raiders would blow this. Well, one thing with. We talked about how we know Giants fans. We also know Jets fans.

Jets fans deep down know that their team is going to fuck this up and win one of these games down the stretch. It's going to happen. They're in pole position, and they're going to fuck it up because they're the Jets, and they're going to end up winning one of these games. And not only winning it, but it's going to be one of those, like a 40-yard touchdown with 10 seconds left or 59-yard field goal. It's going to be this gut-wrenching win,

and they're all going to flip out. It'll probably happen right around Christmas. For a true holiday punch to the boss. But they could be 1-15 and still get that number one, right? You don't think Jacksonville will win? I don't know. Well, Jacksonville's doing their best.

They brought in freaking Mike Glennon. Alright. Three more games. Let's take a quick break. Businesses have had to be flexible this year from working remotely to pivoting their business models for long-term survival and growth. You've seen restaurants trying to figure out a little outdoor dining,

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Let ZipRecruiter take hiring off your plate so you can focus on growing your business. ZipRecruiter.com slash BS. ZipRecruiter, the smartest way to hire. All right. Three night games next week. Sunday night is Chiefs-Broncos. Do we know if Drew Locke will be in this game? He probably will be, right? They made a line, and I'll give you a hint. They made a line based on him playing or one of those guys playing. Right. That's what I figured.

So I got Chiefs by 14 and a half over the Broncos. All right. I said 16 because that's more accurate. But FanDuel agrees with you. It's 13 and a half. Okay. What's the score between us right now? Now I think you're and now I think you're within one now.

It's eight, seven two Monday games. There's no line. There's no line on Baltimore, Dallas. So if you win this, you tie me and I was there line of Baltimore, Dallas. I guess 19 guys have COVID. Yeah. 19 is the magic number. They don't know about Lamar, but Lamar will play

I would have guessed Ravens by 9 over the Cowboys No, I said 7 Alright, now I was off by half a point here, so you basically have to get it exactly 49ers Yeah, 49ers-Bills It's in San Francisco Well, yeah, Wherever they're playing.

Yeah. Oh, so you think this, this actually, they're going to shut this down and make them play it in like where? What do you mean? I think there's a whole order. They can't play there. I don't know. They have to go to like the soccer stadium in San Diego or something.

That'd be cool. I have the 49ers by one all right so you were way off anyway it's buffalo by three i said two and a half oh god damn it buffalo by three yeah i don't know if i agree with that line all right you want another. That's a tough one. Another. Was that my third? What are we? Eight, three, and two you are now. Our bye week teams are the Bucks

and the Panthers. Yeah. This is the latest I remember a bye week in a while. It does seem a little late. Usually knock them out by Thanksgiving.

Did you have the first twinges of sadness that football's going to end soon? Yeah, I'm getting there. Well, it's one way or another. I mean, with all this COVID. It literally might end soon. Yeah.

Yeah, but it is weird, right? We only have, like, I was looking at, I can name Tampa Bay's four opponents. Like, that's how late in the season we are now. All right, it's time for Parent Corner, brought to you by CarMax, America's number one used car retailer.

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Well, we cut it down to 17. No, we had, no, it was just my family, my mother and father, my sister. And so we went around the table. We always say what we're thankful for. And, you know, it was a little emotional this year. I don't know if you do it. Do you do that or you just go right to the eating? We do.

Kyle, nephew Kyle was at Thanksgiving with us and he gave an emotional little speech about stuff he was thankful for. Yeah. Yeah. It's an emotional year, right? It's like, wow, we got to Thanksgiving. Who the hell knew? I'm looking at older people. I'm like, you know, thank God you're still with us. Let's keep this going. And then after that, we decided to play a game of telephone, which I was like, all right, I just want to eat. You know, I'm going to, I'm going to finish off these last 17,000 calories and, and lay down. So they're like, no, no, we'll play telephone. So you whisper in someone's ear and it goes around the table and whatever you've originally whispered is usually screwed up and you get a laugh at the end.

So I think I whispered into my wife's ear, like, I wish football was going on so I didn't have to talk to these people. So she then changed it to Trump wears a red tie. And I hear her say that, and I'm like, oh shit, here we go. So here's the dynamic. My mother and sister are big Biden or anti-Trump. And my father is a big Trumper. My father parks in front of Fox News for 14 hours a day. And so if this gets to him in any certain way, but this is like, you know, like, okay, everyone's being cool. We did the nice thing where we said what we're thankful for. Trump has a red tie, but I could see two moves ahead. So I know this is going to go sideways in a minute. It gets to my mother and sister and it turns into Trump is a big lie or Trump's administration is a big lie.

And then that's whispered to my six-year-old who has to whisper that to my father that Trump is a big lie. And then he's like, oh, really? Oh, we're going to get political now. I'm like, oh, just don't. And then we start talking about votes and counting votes. I'm like, stop, please stop. This is now we're all of a sudden the punchline to every late night joke about the arguing. But yes. And like my six year old is like, what the hell did I do? All I did was repeat what was said to me. Why is why is everyone screaming?

We were just laughing a minute ago. And so I got in front of it. So but I guess the moral stories for once, my wife was the troublemaker. It wasn't me because I know that was going to go really badly. But cooler heads prevailed and we didn't talk politics for the rest of the night. No food fight? The kids were upset. What's that?

No food fight? No, no, no. No, I had eaten everything on the table. So there wasn't room for that. Man. Oh. Tense Thanksgiving. Yeah.

We had, we finished dinner. There was no football game. And then Kyle disappeared in another room and just fell asleep. Passed out. He'd had like, I don't know,

three or four cocktails and a lot of turkey. It was just passed out on a couch. My kids thought this was hilarious. Ben goes over with a Sharpie and draws a giant dick on his arm and a Sharpie, which Kyle didn't realize happened.

Kyle, when did you find the dick on your body? Just show us, Kyle. Zoe came up to me and I washed it off. It took a lot of scrubbing, but Zoe came up to me and pointed it out. I thought I was dreaming, but no, that's your kid. Oh, Zoe told you?

Yeah, she woke me up and told me. Oh. I found out by myself. If you had to put odds on it, just seeing it on your arm, you would have thought Ben, like, minus 2,000, right? Yeah, and he's drawn many of them before. Oh, I see. It was like a professional drawn dick.

No, I think she drew it, but at, at Ben's behest. Oh really? So anyway, yeah. So that was, so you, you had, you had a political argument.

I had dicks being drawn on arms. Yeah. I would have traded with you. Yeah. So do you, do you, are you at the stage with your kids where they want to watch a movie that, you know,

is terrible and you try to talk them out of it, but they won't be denied because they've had success with stuff like Karate Kid, some of the stuff from the past. What do you mean they've had success? I mean, you've pushed that on them, right? Yeah, but I'm saying because there's been good examples, they're like, why can't we watch this one? And you go, no, no, that one's a bad one.

Right, yeah. So my son, we watch both. We watch Bad News Bears and Bad News Bears and Breaking Training. Bad News Bears and Breaking Training, I think, is one of my son's top five favorite movies. Really? And has held up shockingly well. Really?

Like, just shockingly well. It's a little incorrect, but it's just really funny. Is that the Astrodome? Is that the one that ends in the Astrodome? Yeah, okay.'s just really funny. Is that the Astrodome? Is that the one that ends in the Astrodome? Kelly drives the van. They go. Engelbert jumps out to take a dump in the in the elevator. Every beat is good. It's almost perfect.

It's got the let them play. It's like a perfect 70s movie. Some racist stuff though, right? I don't know. It's like incorrect. Now, the first one's more. The first one's a little less PC. But, you know, it a little less PC. Right. Yeah.

But, you know, it was the 70s. Shit happens. Right. But I've never let my son watch the third one, Bad News Bears Go to Japan, which is one of the worst sports movies of all time. It's one of the worst movies ever. And my son's like, no, no, we're going to watch it. And I'm like, no, no, we're not going to watch it.

I'm telling you, it's one of the worst movies. No, no, no. Maybe you don't remember. No, I'm like, no, no, we're not going to watch it. I'm telling you, it's one of the worst movies. No, no, no. Maybe you don't remember. It was no, I'm like, no, I'm positive. It's terrible. I'm positive. There's it's one of the five or 10 worst movies anyone's ever made. No, no. Let's see what Kelly's in it. So he's now he's on IMDb. He's like, Kelly's in it. It's gotta be good. Kelly's in, I'm like, Kelly looks like he's 30 in this one. No, no, no. So anyway, he makes us watch it. I can't tell you how bad it was. I really think it might be the worst movie of all time. And with 10 minutes left, he starts yelling at me.

He's like, why didn't you tell me? I'm like, oh my God, I told you for seven days in a row. No, we can't watch this. It was so bad. And it kind of ruined our Saturday night post Tyson Jones wait who's the Walter Matthau in that it's Tony Curtis

so it's Walter Matthau in the first one William Devane in the second one who's great William Devane is like lights out as Kelly's estranged father and then Tony Curtis in the third one who's just exceptionally unlikable and terrible the movie's it's super racist like in just And then Tony Curtis in the third one, who's just exceptionally unlikable and terrible. And the movies,

it's super racist, like in just kind of an atrocious way. It's not funny. The baseball is like unbelievably dumb. Guys are batting out of order. I really think about like Rocky five, Fletch two, like some of those you think are the,

the worst sequels ever. I really think pound for bound, bad news bears goels ever. I really think Pound for Bound, Bad News Bears, Go to Japan is the worst. Well, I was just going to say to you, I have a great idea for a podcast, and I just need Spotify. I just want Spotify to give me $17 million for it. Can you get that for me?

Yeah. You can. What's the idea? Worst threes. Worst threes. So you could preview Godfather 3. I know you're doing Rewatchables anyway, and it's a great franchise, but worst threes is R you could preview Godfather three. I know you're doing rewatchables anyway, and it's great franchise,

but worst threes is rewatchable threes. It could be bad news. Bears go to Japan. It could be Reggie Miller's three against the Knicks where he really traveled or got whatever, you know, whatever. It's just anything with the three.

That's just pull the threes. Yeah. Threes all over the place. Well, the karate kid three is also atrocious, but is really funny, though. Yeah. Like, you watch that one,

it's now a comedy. It's really good. Coward! The guy, the guy, the rich billionaire devotes his life to destroying

this fucking high school kid. Based on, I know, based on a grudge he held 60 years ago from some guy who lives 10,000 miles away.

That movie, but it's fun. It's like unintentionally hilarious. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Badness Bears Goes to Japan is not, there's nothing fun. Sometimes Japan pays dividends, sometimes it doesn't. It's really, really horrible.

Anyway, I think I won this one over my son, though, because now he believes me when I'm adamantly telling him not to get one. Anyway, so that was my Thanksgiving holiday. Dicks on Kyle's arm and bad news, Paris goes to Japan. And Tyson Jones. That could be a lot worse, yeah.

I want to say something about the golf. I know. Do you have to sign off on Parent Corner? Yeah, let's sign off on Parent Corner. All right, that was Parent Corner brought to you by CarMax, America's number one used car retailer, car buying, car selling the way it should be. Check them out today at CarMax.com. The golf, I get it. House called it.

I was wrong. He had Mickelson, the pro and Barkley against Manning and Curry. And this set me in a tailspin because I had a lot of money on Manning and Curry. I seen enough of Barkley's swing to know that Mickelson, even though it's his course, he owns the course, he's not going to be able to dig himself out. What I didn't know and what I don't think House knew, I'm going to have to check with him, is that oftentimes Barkley was teeing off 90 yards closer than the other three.

How is this not stippy? I read seven articles on this before I made the bet. You don't see this anywhere that Barkley's teeing off closer than these guys. And what it allowed for them to do is sometimes on the par fours, they would use Barkley's tee shot. Right. Because it's a scrum.

They're alternating. And then like Mickelson does the approach shot. So they're on the green and then Barkley can't really screw up from there. I fricking, I can't believe that they got to get rid of these bets. I'm sorry. I used to love the gadget bets. I'm done with them now.

So he was like teeing off from the whites? It was ridiculous. And everybody was okay with it because I guess it was prearranged. And then plus he had the game of his day of his life shooting. So yeah, he was way ahead of everything. So your big losses were Barkley hitting off the white tees. Yeah.

And a fight that was scored by Vinny Pazienza. No, no. And then Nate Robinson not coming through. Those were your three losses? And the Colts. Oh, you stayed away from Tyson. Yeah, I stayed away from that. Oh, we can go back.

I mean, I had the freaking Lions, and I had the Cowboys on Thursday. You had the Lions? Why did you do that? I love the Lions. I just love them. Why? Because teams that got shut out the week before were 12-5-1 against the spread the following week.

I'm like, this is where Stafford steps up. That was such a sad football Thanksgiving. It was bad. I know. It was just, nothing was fun about it it and then we had no night game it was you didn't think fourth and ten the the reverse for uh minus two with the oh i thought that was a good call um what do you got to put uh fox bet live i'm on 5 p.m eastern time on fs1 extra points yes listen to us go to uh extrapoints.com. Brother Bri from Against All Odds picked 10 to 1 odds

that Mahomes would have the most passing yards. Those are free picks on extrapoints.com. Yeah, he was third, by the way. Like, Ryan was first, and I forget who was second, but Mahomes 10 to 1. No Thursday game, and pre-order my book. You can't lose them all at Barnes & Noble or wherever you pre-order stuff like that.

All right, cuz. Good job by you. Good job by you, Billy. That's it for the podcast. Don't forget, new rewatchables coming Monday night. Wall Street. Michael Douglas classic. He won the Oscar for it.

It is weirdly timeless. So we have that coming up. New book of basketball coming this week as well. And don't forget about TV Concierge on Spotify where we're going to be cranking that back up this week. And I'm going to have the first one. And it's going to be about a movie that was on either Hulu or Netflix.

I don't want to spoil it for you, but I will tweet out the link when we put it up. Or just subscribe on Spotify. Back on this feed on Tuesday. See you then.