The Bill Simmons Podcast - NFL Playoff Gambling, Niners Magic, Jameis 30/30 and the Stumbling Pats with Cousin Sal | The Bill Simmons Podcast

Episode Date: December 30, 2019

HBO and The Ringer’s Bill Simmons is joined by Cousin Sal to discuss a 49ers-Seahawks nail-biter, the Dolphins taking down the Patriots, Cowboys-Giants, Jameis Winston’s 30 for 30, favorite Cleveland Browns coach of the decade, and Super Bowl odds (1:54), before guessing the lines for Round 1 of the NFL playoffs (52:25). Finally, Bill is joined by his daughter, Zoe Simmons, to briefly discuss the standout teen culture moments of 2019 (1:22:20). Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Today's episode of the Bill Simmons podcast on the Ringer Podcast Network, brought to you by State Farm. Just like basketball, the game of life is unpredictable. Talk to a State Farm agent and get a teammate who can help you navigate the unexpected. You know what's unexpected? The Patriots losing at home today. We're going to talk about that with Cousin Sal in a second. Get a teammate who can help you navigate the unexpected.

Talk to a State Farm agent today. Meanwhile, we're also brought to you by TheRinger.com, where you can read all the stuff we wrote about football all weekend, as well as the end of the decade stuff, and a whole lot more as we head into 2020. The Ringer Podcast Network is still cranking, featuring The Rewwatchables, which has a special trilogy episode with Quentin Tarantino. Yeah. Putting the first one out on Monday. He picked three movies and we did all three and we're going to run them three

weeks in a row on the rewatchables feed. I won't tell you what the first one is, but we'll be dropping it on Monday afternoon on the rewatchables feed. Yeah. Quentin Tarantino, the Quentin Tarantino on the rewatchables was excited to do it, had films he wanted to do. So yeah, that's happening. Wait for Monday. It will be popping up in the afternoon. Be ready for it. Speaking of popping up, cousin Sal and I are licking our wounds after a horrific week 17 for us, both for our football teams and for gambling. But there was some great stuff too. We're covering it all right now. First, our friends from Pearl Jam. All right.

As always, I'm both excited for the playoffs and I'm sad because the week 17 post podcast means that the season is now over. Everything's over, including your season's over as a Cowboys fan. My season feels like it's headed toward being over as a Patriots fan. And then also we're just getting shellacked and gambling. So we're ready. I've never felt better about week 18. Let's go. We're not doing anything right. It turns out we're supposed to get smarter as a year goes along, I know. It's embarrassing. Not happening.

Let's start on a positive note. We're taping this right after a really great Niner-Seahawks game that had everything you'd ever want from a Sunday night. And Michaels and Collinsworth really wanted it too. Even when it seemed like Seattle had a chance of either getting blown out or just not being in the game. Michaels was bringing his A game. He really wanted it and it all led to

this topsy-turvy fourth quarter. Those teams are both really good. It felt like Seattle even though they lost, it's kind of a win because they get to play the Eagles, right? Yeah, usually going on the road for an extra game is a huge, huge deal. And it's like,

well, it's not, you know, that's much less of a chance of you getting to the finals. And yeah, I guess odds wise it would, it would show and that, you know, you want to rest some of your players, but Seattle's is better on the road anyway. I mean, you know, they, they came on late in the second half, played like old Seattle Seahawks football right there, old Russell Wilson, but they're just better. They're well well, they're four and four at home and seven and one on the road. Right. I don't mind them on the road making their way.

You know, this could be a rematch in two weeks. Wait, did I misunderstand this? Because I thought they were playing in round one no matter what happened in that game. Seattle? I thought Seattle was a three seed if they won that game and a five seed if they lost. Oh, yes, right.

Yeah, they were playing in round one. Yeah, they were. So, okay. So would you rather play Minnesota at home or go to Philly and play this Eagles team that basically it's the entire second string with two guys and Carson Wentz? I guess you want to play on the, it's a tough thing because everyone on the team would say they'd rather play at home. They wouldn't want to pick a team over, you know, over another, but,

um, matchup wise. Yeah. It's probably Seattle at Philly. They already beat them. Um, it's, it's a long travel though.

I don't know. I might say home. I might say home. the other thing, if they're the four seed, assuming New Orleans beats Minnesota, then Seattle wins. Right. Then Seattle plays San Francisco again. Right. Well, that's what's going then Seattle wins. Right.

Then Seattle plays San Francisco again. Right. Well, that's what's going to happen now. Right. Which I think I would probably rather do that in round two than any of the other choices because those teams know each other so well. They're so evenly matched.

It felt like they never really totally tapped into the Lynch thing today. Yeah. And he was coming on and coming on. And then that third down, that pass interference that they didn't call on Hollister, where it seemed like it was all setting up for 12 seconds left, first down from the one, goal to go, basically for the game. You knew they were going to give it to Marchand.

That would have been probably the most exciting moment of the year, honestly. I tweeted that i think p carroll was secretly relieved that they took the false start penalty and moved marched him back five yards he can't afford another colossal botch up in the from the one yard line or the two yard line so they took him back a little bit yeah let's go back that you know first of all they're playing with a backup tackle a backup center a third string tight end um clowny is not 100 percent griffin's not 100 percent uh he's out most of the time uh you know you got marshall lynch you don't know what you're getting out of him and it really didn't seem like

russell wilson was comfortable with any of that in the first half like it really seemed like gun shy and they weren't blocking was the other thing and san francisco was just way physical and uh had their way with them. But towards the end, yes, I think that's a pass interference, but I also think that crazy personal foul call gave them the ball back a second time. That was bad. And if we talk about the 12th man,

that could be the way the 12th man makes a difference. It really could. If it's so loud that the blocking linemen come up and can't hear that the play behind them is done, you really could bait the guy into hitting you, you know, if you're a D-back or something. It's a really bad job by the ref because with three minutes left,

I really doubt that an offensive lineman is just going to go out of his way five seconds after the whistle to just keep hitting somebody and take out their knees. Like the ref should kind of know the situation and how loud it is, but yeah, it all led to, it seemed like for a second, I thought they were going to review the Hollister passer interference because they can actually review that in the last two minutes. And if they don't, what are they, what's it for? Right. Yeah. Why not? Um, but if it had been Lynch from the one yard line with everybody wanting it

and then carol calling the exact same play from super bowl 49 that would have been the most hilarious football moment of the year yeah it may have been the slant pass maybe they get it right this time and it's like look at that yeah see we did call the right play yeah they're they're uh a really resilient team and i wish uh I wish my team had the same resilience. Well, we'll talk about that. I'm glad to, but... I don't want to. Can we not?

I know you don't. That game, so aside from a winner, like, you know, so San Francisco's giving anywhere between two and a half and three and a half points, probably three and a half most of the week, wherever you got them, if you gamble on it. So that is a huge drive in itself. And then even after they're out on downs by three inches, I'm not stretching the ball into the end zone. San Francisco might take a safety there,

which brings it to 26, 23, and then you either push or lose or something if you have San Francisco. But because it was nine seconds left, Jimmy G forges forward and gets a yard or a quarter of a yard or whatever, enough to run the clock out. Unbelievable gambling moment too. We were on a text thread with Hench and Damoshek and I threw out all the right moves and it just bounced off everybody. Nobody even blinked. No, it's true.

I was really ready for at least like five or six texts about all the right moves, but no. But yeah, that was the all the right moves situation, right? The unbelievable defensive stand. They're on their own one and then Rifleman hands off to whoever that Polish kid was. He fumbles it. The other team scores. They lose. And in this one, they did the

quickie Brady QB sneak. Which was great. And they covered. Let's talk was great. And they covered. Let's talk about them. And they cover the, basically every version of whatever a Niners bet would have been, right? Right. Because that line, I think, crept up.

Did it ever creep up to four? I think it did. I don't know. I didn't see a lot of fours out there. Three and a half was a lot, though. Well, it was a tough one for the for Pat's fans to have Jimmy G looking good on a Sunday night considering we traded him away for a second

round pick I don't remember who we got who do we get Kyle Kyle's really down in the dumps I'm worried about Kyle got like a sedan from CarMax after the deal that was a Jimmy G deal Kyle got a hearse yeah I mean this is Belichick's probably That was a Jimmy G deal. Kyle got a hearse.

Yeah, I mean, Belichick's probably watching this game on Sunday night going, yeah, this was my whole plan was for Brady. Brady was going to retire after that last, the Eagles Super Bowl season, and then pass the torch to Jimmy G, and we were just going to keep going. And now I have a 42-year-old quarterback with no receivers. What percent blame do you lay on Belichick for this game? I thought the coaching was atrocious. Yeah.

And look, the Pats are always smarter than everybody else, usually. Today, they were not. Today, they were outcoached by a former Pats assistant, Brian Flores, who will not get coach of the year. But if we were talking about coach of the year candidates, I think he would have to be in the top four, right? I think we should maybe rethink it. I mean, we had Tomlin penciled in, but then I saw 20 straight games that the Steelers haven't scored 30 points.

Yeah, Tomlin's not entirely his fault, but that's a long stretch. Tomlin blew it. Yeah. I think the Green Bay coach has to be in consideration I don't know how that team went 13-3 every week I watch them they either played a terrible second half or a terrible first half and they haven't lost in five weeks you talk about like Saints looking better or Niners looking better those teams

lost more recently to Atlanta Packers kind of in a groove they win ugly and no one likes it but they'reers are in a groove. They win ugly and no one likes it, but they're in a groove. The case for Brian Flores is that team, first three weeks of the season, we were having debates about whether this was going to be the worst football team of all time. Then they make the Minka Fitzpatrick trade. They traded Tunsell before the season. It seemed like they were going to try to usher in the first ever legitimate, we are

trying to tank NBA style type of performance. And the second half of the year, they became one of the feel-good stories of the league. We beat them by 40 points. Almost every game after September, they really did. And for a defense that...

I think they were the only defense that allowed over 30 points a game. They were fun. They were like Tampa, although I guess they're both East. They're both in Florida, right? Yeah. They're the AFC Tampa.

Well, it's not like they had a ton of weapons. No. It was basically Parker, the tight end who's pretty good. Then it was just random running backs. They had a couple wide receivers make play today I could never

keep track of who was who and then Fitzpatrick who has definitely had the weirdest career of any quarterback I would say

the last 15 years right and this being his greatest day of that career yeah you would think right he was I think so

he was serenely confident to the point that as they were driving down, I was just assuming they were going to score. This team that we thought might have the best defense in recent memory the first eight weeks of the season. Now, by week 17, I'm hoping the Dolphins can score fast enough so we can get the ball back.

What the hell happened? What happened to my Pat season? I don't know. I think, is it possible that defense just is exhausted? They just played so hard and out of their minds. And now Stefan Gilmore doesn't know what to do against Devante Parker, who was a good receiver. And by the way, he really came through after signing a $40 million deal.

It really inspired him. That's not usually how it works in sports. But they just looked like a little better than average. They definitely should have scored on the Dolphins. Like I said, one of the worst defensive teams. Is it possible they just overworked and just two games too long?

I thought Miami came in with a specific plan to actually go after Gilmore, which most teams were afraid to do all year. They felt like they had an advantage with Parker for whatever reason. I never would have thought that before the game, but he, he basically Gilmore can't win defensive player of the year now. Cause he was terrible in that game. And it was a hard to imagine a defensive back winning that award anyway. But now after that, I'm not sure he can win. He was favored going into the week, but yeah, Chandler was right there.

There were a few guys right up there. And then they attacked Chung, which was smart because Chung, I don't think has been the same since he got hurt earlier in the year. And then our pass rush, Fitzpatrick just, he kept kind of creating ways to create another two, three seconds here or there. They had no run game to speak of. And on the other side, it felt like the Pats could run on them for five, seven yards whenever they wanted. And they always got into trouble when

they stopped running, but it was a really discouraging game. That should have been the get well. I don't care who he's throwing to. I know you're going to make that. I know you tweeted that all the receivers suck and everything, but guess what? Carson Wentz had 4,000 yards and threw to, you know, top three guys were hurt. And they just brought guys like G. Ward in. I don't know who else. But the thing is, Brady, he threw for 4,000 yards too. And he actually put up half-decent stats in this game.

To me, it doesn't seem like he's on the same page with any of these guys. They don't have the ability, I think because he just doesn't trust the people around him to go no huddle anymore. And, you know, to kind of change the pace depending on the quarter. Right. Doesn't seem like he feels like he can do that anymore. So they've become really predictable. Edelman is a shell of himself. I'm convinced like he is hiding some major injury

because he doesn't look like himself anymore. And then the tight end position is just a non-entity for them. And then, you know, you would have thought James White would have had like 15 catches today at three. So I don't know what they're doing, but from a Brady standpoint, he just has a lot of bad throws. I know the stats add up. And if you look at the totality and you can blame the receivers and he's not familiar with Sanu and Sanu's not playing well, you go through all the things, but the throws just don't look good, especially in the first hour of the game, as we've talked about over and over again.

He misses throws. He makes bad throws. The balls hang up in the air too much. There's a lot of uncutchable balls and he just doesn't look the same. I don't think he looks bad, but I don't think at this point as a 42 year old guy, he can kind of carry an offense

and get and get a team like the team he has to 30 points when they need it. And by the way, Wentz can't either. Right. Well, we'll see what Wentz does. That team has a weird mystique about him.

And guess what? The Patriots still do too and you know if Fitzpatrick doesn't drive 80 yards on them you win your 10th you get your 10th bye in a row and people talk about what a scare it was oh my god well they actually scored but the thing is that's why

it was such a terrible loss they had the lead with 4 minutes left and Miami had to go 80 yards and they're fucking Miami. And they went 80 yards easily. It's terrible. Your team, you blew it last week, but then you had the,

I call it the game seven 1986 World Series scenario where you're dead. You've been pronounced dead, but you're not dead yet. The family's still in the hospital room with you. Yeah. You're like, ah, maybe he'll wake up. And there's possible signs of life.

And then the Giants tie it. Barkley busts one. And you're killing Washington. You're feeling good. And then you die again. Right. Brutal. Daniel Jones turns it over.

And I'm like, oh, I'm mad. And I'm like, what am I mad about what what am I what's wrong here I don't want any chance of Jason Garrett coming back Jason Garrett and the press conference it's so perfectly put it he said well it was out of our hands the whole thing was out of our hands all right I think it was in your hands the first 16 weeks though right we could say that it's not like they randomly decide who gets to go to the playoffs in Week 17, depending on if you lose or not. But, hey, 47 points,

man. Take that. I love it. That's all that matters. Most points last week, right? Poor Aikman. They're like, Troy, we got you to another Dallas game. It's like, really? Ken, is there any other game? It's like, no, there's actually not really a great NFC game unless you want to do Philly giants.

Right. All right. Yeah. Well, the Philly, they, I mean, guys were getting injured during that game.

They had already passed the crazy injury point. I would say five weeks ago. And what was that? Their, their pro bowl guard, all of a sudden he's getting carried off. He's on a cart. I've never seen anything like it.

I really respect Wentz. Great job by him. Yeah. I wasn't sure on him and I don't think you were either, right? No, for sure not. And, you know, especially like going, the bottom line is the Giants

weren't going to do the Cowboys any favors. They may have gotten close and said, oh, wait, no, we hate this team more than we hate the Eagles. So't going to do the Cowboys any favors. They may have gotten close and said, oh, wait, no. We hate this team more than we hate the Eagles, so we've got to back off a little bit. But no, all kidding aside, he went in there in the rain. He knew the Giants almost beat him the first time. Not an easy game.

Only like a four-and-a-half, five-point favorite, depending on where you get it. And, yeah, they kicked the crap out of him when they needed to. It was close, and then they opened it up. They could be a little bit of a threat. I think we thought, and we're going to go over the lines in a minute, I think we thought the 5C, whoever comes out of the West in the wild card, is going to be a seven-point favorite, and it's going to be easy.

Not so sure. Well, Landon Roberts was second in receiving yards for the Pats today. I don't think I could feel worse. And it actually might be our most potent offensive player, if Edelman's here. You could have had the bye. Could have had the bye. So close.

I tweeted out earlier today how Roberts had as many TDs this season as Antonio Brown and Josh Gordon. Wow. But he had one more than Sonny Michelle, Ben Watson, and Rex Burkhead, and one less than Nikhil Harry. So it's been that kind of season. Yeah, well, you need a good quarterback. The Patriots fan base is in complete tumult right now

because half the people are blaming Belichick and the other half are blaming Brady and just the dynasty. And this is, of course course this was going to happen. And can I predict what's going to happen here? You're really going to win round two. I don't think they're very good. I didn't think they were even,

I thought they were going to either lose to Buffalo or win by three last week. And they won by seven. They're probably not long for the final. So the final four, even, but they put them at the Nike. And this is the first time to AFC teams are playing in the same game in a

long time to AFC play Saturday and FC play Sunday because they wanted to put the Patriots at night because they might not have the chance next Saturday night. So, oh, so that's official confidence as the week goes on, you're going to gain so much confidence and you're going to, your pats are going to be in everything. Every money line parlay, every straight bet, everything. Usually you'll see what happens.

So they put the two AFC teams on Saturday and the other NFC games are Sunday? Right. So the Shakey's Bowl, Buffalo at Houston, is the early game Saturday. And then at night, Tennessee at New England. I told you that there was no way Buffalo-Houston wasn't going to be the early Saturday game. No matter what they're going to do. I was like, they love putting Patriots at night. How are they going to do it? They can't put both AFC and Saturday and they did it.

I don't remember that in a while. Well, and then on top of everything, they have to play this Tennessee team. Jesus. Well, we have a whole bunch of other stuff to cover. Let's talk about Crown Royal. They launched the first off the field water break last year to encourage fans of the game to moderate

and hydrate, stay in the game. Whether you're watching in the stadium, watching Homer in a bar, have a great time. Enjoy some crown. Don't be that person that ruins it for everyone. Make the right call. Take a water break. Sal, who made the right call this week or not? All right.

So, well, I have a right call and a wrong call, and I'm going off the NFL board. It's a game you watched, a college game, Clemson-Ohio State. I'll admit there's a little sour grapes because I picked Ohio State to win, and I backed it with a lot of money. And Ohio State's up 16-0. They blow the lead. And then so Clemson catches a pass, Justin Ross. He fumbles it.

Jordan Fuller on Ohio State scoops it and scores. They take the lead 23-21. They review the catch. Now, on the field, they made it called a catch. Everything's great. All the elements are there. They overturn it on the field. I say good call by the ref, bad call by whatever idiot in New York is looking at this.

Again, it's sour grapes. Ohio State had two shots. They punted on fourth and four at the 39-yard line, and then Fields throws an interception in the end. It's their fault they lost, but this is terrible. I mean, this football move has to go. The football move was there. First of all, you're on the football field.

Anything you do is a football move. That's it, okay? If you start squeezing groceries in the produce aisle, that's a produce move. Sorry. You're on the football field, anything you do is a football move. That's it. Okay. If you start squeezing groceries in the produce aisle, that's a, that's a produce move. Sorry that you're on the football field. That's it. And also he raised the ball so as to not get it stripped. That's a football move too. I just don't understand why possession, uh, and steps doesn't equal a catch. So good move by the refs, bad move by the overall. That's a good one. My Ray call this week,

Bruce Arians. Game goes into overtime. He's playing Atlanta. Neither team is heading to the playoffs. Neither team even has a chance to be above 500 for the year. He's 68 years old. He can't watch Jameis Winston anymore. And he's like,

how can I make this game end fast enough? I'm going to receive the ball and I'm going to call a quick out to Jameis and hopefully he'll throw a pick six and put us all out of our misery. And that's exactly what happened. Yeah. I think he had a master plan. Bruce Aarons, you get my great call of the week. CrowdMoro reminds everyone this football season

to take a water break and moderate, stay in the game. So we've been on this Jameis thing for like two months. Love it. I don't remember the first time we talked about the possibility of a 30-30 season for him, but it's been a running joke with us for weeks. And it kind of became everybody, it was on everyone's radar this whole week

that he needed two more to get it. And then it didn't seem like it was going to happen. And then finally it happened. Not only did it happen, he threw his seventh pick six, which is also a new record. So he made history all over the place, not to mention he threw for over 5,100 yards. And I have no idea what I would do if I was Tampa. What do you mean you have no idea? It's so exciting.

I know he's exciting, but if my goal is to actually try to make the playoffs and win playoff games, I'm not sure he could be my quarterback. Oh, no, no, no. You have to sign him. You have to. I'm trying to think of what it's like. It's like having a dog, like having a Basset hound who excels at ultimate frisbee,

but also shits on the neighbor's lawn all day long. You've got to tell you, it's such an attraction. I mean, would Michael Jordan, would he play for that minor league team? What was it, the Barons? They'd still have him playing, right? It's a great attraction. You've got to get fans there. It's an exciting team.

You got Shaq Barrett. He had 19 and a half sacks. I think he led the league. And Jameis, are you kidding me? You have to re-sign that guy. So you think their slogan for 2020 would be like, Jameis, shit is going to happen. Yes.

Good shit, bad shit. It's going to be shit. Yeah. So I think the 30 interceptions when you look at the landscape of just how few interceptions we have now in football like we had brady finished with eight wentz had seven going into the last game i don't know how many he ended up with rogers i think did think, did he have one today? He had three heading into that game. But you're talking about half of the league starting quarterbacks are in single digits for interceptions.

And Jameis threw 30. He threw seven pick sixes. He threw more pick sixes than some quarterbacks threw interceptions for the whole year. So I don't know how you can bring him back. It would make sense if he himself were blocking for the guy who intercepted the ball't know how you can bring him back. It would make sense if he himself were blocking for the guy who intercepted the ball.

Like, how do all those get returned? Like, I still don't understand it. It's amazing. It's amazing. And the way he ended the game was so good. I mean, Game of Thrones, take a look. Take a look. Lost Game of Thrones.

Take a look at how you end the season. That's how you do it. That is a season finale right there. We need to call out something. The pick six. To end the season on a pick six? I don't know what, maybe we need to come up with a name. Pick six feet under something. I don't know. Pick six under. Yeah. So good. I don't know if Brady's leaving the Pats after this year. It certainly wouldn't surprise me. I was thinking Tampa would be a good team for him if he wanted to play the card of

I just want to have good receivers and a veteran coach and I just want to air it out for like two more years because Perriman I think they have to re-sign Perriman but I thought he was really good for them the second half of the year

I don't know what they do he had 5109 yards Jameis it seemed like Mike Evans had 1000 to 1500 I don't know what they do. I mean, he had 5,109 yards, Jameis. It seemed like Mike Evans had 1,000 to 1,500. Like, I don't know where all these yards came from. Well, I have a new home for Jameis because I actually think Tampa's too small of a city for him. Why don't you take him? New England, that's a good trade.

No, no, I have a better. The LA Chargers. Oh, interesting. They need some sort of attraction. They're moving into this new stadium. They can't sell any seat licenses. They have to get rid of Rivers. Rivers is done.

They have no identity whatsoever, nor will they. How do you have an identity? You're the team that has Jameis Winston, the most exciting week-to-week quarterback in the league, other than Lamar Jackson. Yeah. We have a guy who can win or lose every five minutes, depending on what's happening.

You can't take your eyes off this guy. He's on our team. He's on the LA Chargers. Here he is. That's pretty good. That should be their guy, right? Put him with Eckler and Keenan Allen and Mike Williams. That's a really fun team.

I think it's fun. We would go. We would go to an LA Chargers game if Jameis was the quarterback. We probably would. But the other thing is they don't take advantage of Rivers either. Like Rivers, he's a different kind of disaster than Jameis. But he's talking to himself on the sidelines all the time. He should be mic'd up for the stadium to hear throughout the three-hour game.

Like that's it. That's how you get people to go. That's hilarious if you do that. Well, I hope Rivers, I would much rather see him retire than find another team because as we've discussed before, I think he could be a really good TV guy. I think he has sneaky high TV potential

as either a Monday Night Football guy or I don't care about the studio show as much because I don't watch the studio shows. Like I'd be more excited if he was on like Fantasy Football Now, just as Stefania Bell and Matthew Barry are talking about who's the QB7

this week. Just how amused he'd be by all of it. I don't think he could do Monday Night Football. The bar is very, very high there. Very high. By the way, a lot of people seem to think that Tessitore has toned it down.

Oh, really? Yeah, that it's like when Garrett stopped clapping. Maybe we could take a small victory in that we've made so many jokes. Maybe somebody told him or something. He may have. But the other thing is I sent you a video. I don't know who was doing the game, the Giants-Eagles game. Was it Ian Eagle?

I don't know who it was. But whenever Boston Scott carries the ball, everyone goes crazy. Well, you said it in the text. It's a very fun name to say. Yeah. Boston Scott. That is Boston Scott. Really weird movie type endings.

Are we getting Tessitore on Saturday? I don't know that we are. I did get some notes from some fans in Australia who are bummed that they're getting Tessitore and Booger for the Super Bowl they already know that they're getting they must be doing the foreign games the English speaking they're doing the Australian Super Bowl?

yeah the Australian Super Bowl ESPN should put that on the app I'd probably tune in if the game was a blowout the Phil Rivers thing really quickly. Do you know what his career record was? I looked it up. It's one of those careers that felt more substantial than it actually was. All due respect to Phil.

He was 123 and 100 for his career. He was five and six in the playoffs. Can you guess how many AFC title games he played in? Two, one. He played in one. He lost to the 2007 Pats when he heroically played in an AFC with a torn ACL. All right. Two to one TD interception. Now he's the signature quarterback on this franchise that then left its city. It's kind of a bummer. If you're talking mid-2000s, it was Rivers, Eli, Roethlisberger, and Breeze. It was like the new wave, right? Eli wins two Super Bowls and becomes the most

polarizing Hall of Fame case of all time. Roethlisberger wins two Superbowls. Breeze becomes one of, you know, even if the NFL 100 didn't think so, one of, one of the 10 or 12 best quarterbacks ever. And Rivers just kind of was there and had a, had a pretty good career. And I think we all really respected him and he won some games,

but not really not a lot to remember. Kind of feel bad for him. Yeah, and Eli's going to make the Hall of Fame. I compare him to Eli because he's on his way out too, apparently. 20 games better than Eli, right? 20 over 500? Is that what he is? Yeah, and I think you can make the

case that if they just switched teams, he probably would have had similar success, maybe. I think if you switch teams, probably neither of them does anything. It's weird. Well, the funny thing is they should have switched teams because San Diego was going to draft Eli. Absolutely.

Remember? And that led to the whole trade and all that. But yeah, it's weird. I felt like Rivers was a bigger figure these last 15 years than I think the record would suggest. I'll be interested to see if he's a Hall of Fame case because my gut reaction would be like, oh yeah, of course he's a hall of famer. But then you

actually think about his career in context against the other QB peers that he had and the lack of playoff success and stuff like that. And the fact that the last part of his career, he really didn't age that well in a league where quarterbacks have aged really well right and for whatever reason he hasn't so i don't know i don't know what happens to him but you know what's strange he needed to go a little further i think in the playoffs because that's the big thing i know as a one run i'm told over and over that yeah no he didn't go far enough in the playoffs didn't get to the playoffs enough but i and i look at last year and this is a big game because i'm not going to ruin

it we all put it we put our guesses in for the spreads already but this was a similar thing last year the chargers came off a win a road win against the ravens that wasn't the the 2019 lamar jackson ravens but yeah the road win in the playoffs they went to foxborough a lot of people thought they were the better team and they were getting a similar number of points. I want to, I want to pinpoint it as Tennessee is this Saturday night. Yeah. And this is why I think you're going to turn. You're going to be like, no Patriots laid the smack down. That's what's going to happen. But had he won that game, I almost think that might've been enough to push him over. Yeah. And I think the difference with that Chargers team last year

and why I eventually talked myself into the pats on this Tennessee team is I was never sold on the coaching side of the San Diego. The Belichick versus Anthony Lynn and his coaching staff, I just felt like that was a major advantage for us. I think Tennessee is really well coached. And you could make a case that if they had just played Tannehill the whole year that might have been an 11 win team

you know Henry's is there any running back you would take over Henry? don't even talk to me about it I had Chubb I had a couple hundred bucks on Chubb at 9 to win and win the 9 to 1 against the Bengals too week 17

oh crap the Bengals treated it like it was their Super Bowl. Titans are playing a backup Texans team. I don't even want to discuss it. Well, you know what we can discuss? It's the end of the Freddy Kitchens era already. I know. That's sad, too. I found that out within 45 seconds of the Cowboys season officially ending.

I was like, I can't take this one-two punch. I love Freddy Kitchens. I love him almost as much as Jameis. I don't know if I'd be able to choose between the two. Well, now I don't have to. You're going to love him even more when he replaces Todd Furman on your show. And he's in the third square. I would love that. You and Clay and Freddie. Freddie just being confused. It's his turn to make a pick, but a minute runs off and he doesn't realize that he was up. Then it goes to commercial as he starts making his pick.

It'll be great. He wears a stupid, ironic t-shirt every day, a different one. We have to laugh. I can deal with that. Let me ask you who your favorite Browns coach

of the decade was. So the Browns were 42 and 118 this decade. Here are your nominees. Eric Mangini. He coached in 2010. So the Browns were 42 and 118 this decade. Here are your nominees. Eric Mangini, he coached in 2010. The Immortal Pat Shermer, 2011 and 12. Rob Chijinsky, 2013.

Mike Pettin, was it Pettin or Pettine? Pettin. Mike Pettin, 2014 and 15. Hugh Jackson, put in three years or two and a half years. Greg Williams or Freddie Kitchens. Those are your seven nominees. We had a lot of fun with Hugh, right? How would you power rack these? It's tough, but I put Freddie.

I think I was such untapped talent. I thought we missed out so much with Freddie. He needed one more year. Not that he was going to do anything for this team, wins-wise, but we would have enjoyed him so much more. For our enjoyment, Freddie was the most fun. Freddie could have done like Bobby Valentine stuff thing. Like he'd get thrown out of a game and come back with a disguise. I think he had so much in him that we was untapped. I liked Freddie's reactions as his wide receivers were yelling at him during random games,

where he just had this amused look like when my son is flipping out when I'm playing Madden with him. Right. And I'm just kind of amused. I don't feel physically threatened, even though it feels like I should be because I have this little tiny person

screaming at me. Right. That's how he carried himself, I felt like, with Beckham and Landry. Yeah. I think Kitchens was the runner-up comedy MVP because it's recency bias.

Nobody was funnier than Hugh Jackson. I guess so. Hugh Jackson was the best. Hugh Jackson's hard knocks was iconic. He's still the funniest one. And I would put Mangini third because Mangini was Fredo. He went against Michael Corleone.

And it backfired on him. You might be right about Kitchens. Mangini and Hugh Jackson make FS1 appearances every now and then. I think that's where they land, all of them. They have an understanding with the Browns. Next time you fire your coach,

send him here. What about the owner though? This is five coaches in eight years, but maybe, you know, it's six. Cause he, he inherited Shermer. Yeah.

And plus like how many different front offices has he had? He's had at least five. Right. Enough. And then he allowed Costner to film draft day and use the Browns. Oh, right. Which was like,

of course that was going to backfire. Yeah. Dumbass. He might be my favorite owner. We should do those power ratings. So many good ones. The Browns had a bad decade last decade. And this decade was like way worse.

42 and 118. This is why I should never complain about the Patriots. Well, and you know, here's the other thing. I can make fun of the Browns, but that coach that I want let go, every time I feel bad for him, seven years this decade,

we didn't make the playoffs. Jason Garrett this decade, we didn't make the playoffs. Jason Garrett. So seven years, you didn't make the playoffs. Seven out of the 10. Yeah. Jesus. I don't know what to tell you about the Jason Garrett thing. We've talked about it all decade.

You were out on him probably 2014. Yeah. And you had it for another five years. He did a weird thing where he won a game at the Giants with a backup quarterback, and that somehow added six years to his deal. I don't know. I'm going to give you two quarterbacks right now. One quarterback in his last nine games

threw for 2,611 yards, 15 TDs, and six picks. The other quarterback threw for 2,611 yards, 15 TDs, and six picks. The other quarterback threw for 2,065 yards, 13 TDs, and four picks. One of those two QBs is Tom Brady, and the other is Ryan Fitzpatrick. Wow. Who threw for less yards? I mean, you're setting me up. So the shittier one was Brady? Yeah.

Yeah, okay. Fitz threw for 550 yards more than him. Mm-hmm. And more touchdowns. Right. And it's not like he had more weapons.

I mean, I guess maybe their schedule is a little bit easier. Not afraid to sling it and neither is Tannehill. And that's that's one good thing. I mean, you know,

some of these teams go into Foxborough and they're half beaten. Well, so if you're a Dolphins fan, are you furious about this Tannehill thing or are you saying, are you furious that he's good now or are you furious

that you had a good quarterback but everybody else was so incompetent that you fucked it up? Yeah, probably the second one. I don't know. You can only be so mad because they've seen it happen before with everybody, but I don't think that's interesting. You have two Dolphins quarterbacks've seen it happen before with everybody. But I don't think, oh, that's interesting. You have two Dolphins quarterbacks you could lose to in two weeks.

I didn't even realize that. Oh, my God. This is getting good. Do you know that he led the league in quarterback rating? Yeah, I know. I did a whole thing on that. I hate quarterback rating. If you look at some of these guys in quarterback,

like Josh Allen is 17th in quarterback rating. I'd much rather have him than a lot of the guys in top four. And Kirk Cousins is fourth. That probably invalidates a lot of it. Although Kirk Cousins, you know, ended up with decent stats, as he always does. That's why, thank God we have the eye test. Thank God we have all the people that actually watch football. Well, how happy is Cousins at that?

Because that was going to be the Saturday game. Cousins at New Orleans. I mean, he shits the bed at night. You can't, I don't know what it is with him. Very strange. We had one of the many terrible bets that I made today are betting decisions. We, you really liked the lions. You thought the lions Packers game looked fishy. Yeah. You thought something didn't smell right with it to you. So we decided to do a Lions Panthers underdog bet. Me, you, and house.

It was 48 to one. We're like, this will be fun. We just sprinkled a little on it. The Lions score right away. And it's like, this is great. And then it's like, let's go to New Orleans where the Saints have scored again. It's 14-0.

Will Greer, who they just basically threw to the Lions, not the Detroit Lions. Yeah, and he's just looked under siege for four or five weeks and just gets the sheet kicked out of him and looks terrible. And then they bring in Kyle Allen, who they had already decided wasn't the guy. I like when that happens with football, where it would be like if you got rid of your wife

and you dated somebody for five weeks, and then you're like, all right, honey, come on back. You're like, wait, what? You just got rid of me. Right, right, right. That's Kyle Allen. Yeah. So he's back.

Nephew Kyle, we're going to have to cut this from the podcast. It's too close to home. I know what you're saying. Anyway, the Panthers get killed, then we lose that bet. But yeah, you were on the whole line. You know what's funny? I looked at your tweet this morning, and it's so ironic. It's like, it's something to the effect of,

I'm so ready for a topsy-turvy NFC today. Something, I'm prepared for anything. And I was like, oh my God, it was your team. Yeah, it was my team. It's a 16 and a half point favorite in the AFC that lost. It was the second biggest upset of the last, what, 25 years?

At least we had honor. I lost because I did the classic thing that we do all the time where when we want to narrow somebody's odds a little bit, we throw in huge favorites and we know they're going to win. It was like, of course, the Patriots are going to win.

They're playing for a bye week. They're playing Miami. They're 15.5 huge favorites. And we know they're going to win. It was like, of course, the Patriots are going to win. Right. They're playing for a bye week. They're playing Miami. They're 15 and a half point favorites. We'll throw in that minus 1400, put that in with the Chiefs, and then the Celtics on Friday. And then that moved to Tennessee,

allowed us to do the Tennessee Moneyline. Tennessee was my favorite game of the day. And somehow I didn't even bet it straight up. Had them tied to the fucking Pats and just get kicked in. Tennessee, that line went from three to five to seven to nine. I think it kicked off at 10 as you saw more and more players. And then Kansas City won. So it didn't matter for, like the Texans weren't catching the Patriots, right?

So you weren't going to see Watson. You weren't going to see Hopkins, any of those guys. And they just took care of business. Well, that was my lesson to take forward to next year, is that we knew on Monday that that Tennessee line was wrong. We knew that Houston was like, no, they're playing their starters. And then we looked at it. We looked at all the variations, and it was like,

if the Pats win and the Chiefs win. There's absolutely no way Houston can move out of the four seed. Why would they play their starters? This makes no sense. And then of course comes to late last night. All of a sudden it's like, Oh, Houston might bench their starters.

The line starts moving, ends up seven and a half this morning, climbs all the way to 10. And we had it at three for two days. Yeah. We knew they weren't going to play their starters, so let's file that away for next year. But it was also contingent on Kansas City's win,

which was easy enough, you know, although the charges were a little bit friskier than I would have liked, but. Yeah, there was a moment where it started to look like Phil Rivers' last hurrah. Yeah. But I think his last hurrah is going to be his ninth kid. That's how that's going to play out.

One more kid? Yeah. Let's take one more break. Let's take a break to talk about Google Assistant and the Ringer NBA show. What do those two have in common? Well, first of all, the Ringer NBA show is a really good show. We put up at least four episodes a week

featuring a bunch of rotating ringer hosts, as well as the mismatch twice a week with Kevin O'Connor and Chris Vernon. I know those guys. So here's what this has to do with Google Assistant. If you like the NBA, if you like hearing people argue about the NBA and talk about the topical storylines as they're happening, well, you should tell the Google assistant. In fact, you can tell the Google assistant, hey, Google, play the Ringer NBA show podcast.

Okay, here's the latest episode of the Ringer NBA show. The Lakers come up short again against the Clippers. Plus, Rockets falter. Carlisle calls the post extinct, the mismatch. Hey, Google, pause the Ringer NBA show podcast. Oh, great. Thank you. Because right now we're about to head to an especially fun time of the season where we

have all-star coming. People argue about the all-star starters and reserves for two solid weeks that nobody actually watches the game or cares about it. I really enjoy this part of the season. All right. Back to this podcast. All right. Back to this podcast. All right. You wanted to talk about we, but before we do guest lines, we did a bunch of predictions before the year. How did we do? Yeah. Well, there's this guy, we should thank

this guy, Chris H on Twitter at CP Haynes, 78. He made some kind of crazy spreadsheet. We did AFC and NFC over on those back in late August. It's interesting because it is kind of crazy spreadsheet uh we did afc and nfc over on those back in late august um it's interesting because it is kind of like we followed our conferences here i went 10 and 6 in the nfc you went eight and eight i think our worst pick was 49ers under eight and a half we both had that um and what was weird was so i had philadelphia to win the division you had dallas uh you had green bay i had chicago i don't know what the hell i was thinking i had Philadelphia to win a division. You had Dallas. You had Green Bay. I had Chicago. I don't know what the hell I was thinking.

I had New Orleans. You had Tampa. And we both had the Rams. Thanks for nothing, Rams. So we did terrible. No first round pick till 2022, the Rams. But three out of the four division winners were different in the NFC. Three out of the four were the same in the AFC. So that

was interesting. And for the AFC, you did better. You went nine and seven, I think, and I went seven and nine. We both had under. Oh, I had under. That was terrible with Baltimore. That was my worst pick. We both had New England to win the division. We won that. We both had Pittsburgh. That was killed when Big Ben went out.

I had Houston. You had Indy. And we both had Casey. So we basically, we don't totally suck at this, but we're not good at it either. Yeah, no, no. We're better in August than we are in, what is this now, December? Yeah. Damn it.

Well, the San Francisco thing, we saw a really bad Garoppolo preseason game and got freaked out. Remember that? We should file that one away for next year too because that lousy preseason performance threw more people off their scent. It completely flipped the narrative. They had been like, oh, here's the hot team.

This is 2019 sleeper team. He sucked in one game. People were like, they're out. Fuck them. They're out. Division's too hard. So, um, they are so damn good though.

I mean, they, they were so physical in the first half and they're fast as shit. And you got that Kyle use check that fullback who's, I think he's a four time pro bowler. He's, I mean, you look at,

you look at Kittle and he's, he really is Gronk with a different Jersey, right? We're in 85. We're in the Niners Jersey. Yeah. All the excitement, all the, is Gronk with a different jersey right wearing 85 wearing the Niners jersey yeah I thought all the excitement all the everything Gronk has

and then you got the great play calling they're a dynamite team I thought Gronk was the best tight end ever when he retired I was like that's the best tight end

I'm probably gonna see Kittle Kittle is right on pace and I thought Collinsworth made a really good point. It really doesn't seem like he thinks he can get tackled.

Right. He's going through these dudes. He just assumes everybody is going to bounce off him. Yeah, he's really bummed when he gets taken down. He's like, what? You tackled me? Yeah, he does have that vibe of, and which Young Rock definitely had too,

of that kid who's too big to be in the game where it's like ah your 14 year old cousin's in this game it's just like us nine-year-olds this isn't fun now and he's just rolling through people but they the thing with the niners i i really like them in the game today which is ironic because they came within an inch of losing but the speed is there they have two receivers beyond kiddo that seem like they can get open when they need them. And then this rotating running back crew and all the guys are fast and can do stuff. And, and as long as Jimmy doesn't throw the ball to the other team,

it just seems like they can move the ball. I like the NFC because whether we're, whether it's Wentz or Wilson and let's say the Saints advance, that's a great final four. As far as quarterbacks, you're not going to get much better than that. With Jimmy G and Russell Wilson and Rodgers and Breeze, that's phenomenal. I actually think they're good enough that I was wondering if they were going to go for it after that stupid unnecessary roughness call. I think it ended up being fourth and two from the 30.

Yeah, it was like two or three. Yeah. And I was like, are they going to go for this? And if they went for it, I was like, they're going to get this. I really thought that

they could get three yards if they absolutely needed it. I'm confident in all their play calling. I really am. Yeah. I think that's as we head into the into the

the 12 team playoffs. I think that's the best NFC team, don't you? The best NFC team? Yeah. If I had to pick one team, you're like, my life depends on it. I think I would pick the Niners. I think so.

Well, like I said, the Packers haven't lost in a while. It's been the longest for them, like five weeks. But I think they could get tripped up. Yeah, if San Francisco's home, I think that's the team. They really do. So we have Super Bowl odds right now. The Ravens are plus 240.

And there's some crazy end-of-the-year Ravens stats. Have you seen some of these? Some bats, you said? No, that they had the best point differential since the NFL merger in 1970. They had a better point differential than the 2007

Pats. And then I saw this too in a couple places. They're the first team that ever averaged 200 yards rushing and 200 yards passing per game in a season. They're a 200-200 team. That's nuts.

They also broke the 1978 Patriots rushing record, which is, we hadn't won a Super Bowl until 2001, or I guess February 2002. But the 1978 team rushing record was one of the things I really held on to in the pre-Brady Belichick dynasty. We ran for like 30- You like that? Now it's gone. 14 games. We ran for like 30- You like that? Now it's gone. 14 games.

We ran for like 3,200 yards or something. Well, maybe you'll have a chance to pay him back in two weeks. Ravens are plus 240. Niners are plus 350. Chiefs, 4-1. Saints, 7-1. Packers, 10-1. Patriots, 15-1.

Seahawks, 22-1. Eagles, 35-1. Vikings, 40-1. Texans, 45 to one bills, 55 to one. I got to tell you, Titans at 60 to one is enticing. Oh, come on. It's enticing. It's a lot. Those are big odds. So they have to be Brady and Lamar Jackson and probably Mahomes. So here's the recipe. I'm just going to make the case. They beat the Pats. They go to Baltimore for round two.

Seven degrees. Ugly, bruising 13 to 10 type game, right? And they just try to hopefully run the ball. A.J. Brown makes one play. They pull one out. Casey loses to whoever from the Houston. A.J. Brown makes one play. They pull one out. Casey loses to whoever from the Houston Buffalo thing. And they play one of

those teams. That would be the road, I guess. I don't think they could beat... It seems far-fetched to beat the Pats, Lamar, and Mahomes. I just don't think the Ravens will lose their first game. I wouldn't take them plus 240. The value's not there. I like the Chiefs will lose their first game. I know, I wouldn't take them plus 240. The value is not there.

I like the Chiefs. You know, three weeks ago, they were eight to one, and then they were six to one. Now, what'd you say? They're four to one? Yeah, but Andy Reid's still their coach. I just want to tell you that.

Yeah, that's true. That's true. And still not sold on their running backs. The thing is, they have so much speed that it does seem like one of those teams that you feel like you're beating them for two and a half quarters, and then

the rookie returns some punt, or Tyreek Hill all of a sudden is an 80-yard catcher, and then all of a sudden you're down three, and you don't know what happened. They're like a basketball team. They might do something stupid, but that McColl Hardman is heating up at the right time, and I don't know. Just little things that just seem like they should but you know that McCall Hardman is heating up at the right time. And I don't know. I just like,

just little things that you see, like there should be running the clock out on third and seven, like Holmes throws it like 35 yards complete. Right. Like three minutes left. Well, he's definitely healthier than he was. Yeah. I would just remind you not to trust Andy Reid.

All right. So what would be your Superbowl right now? Right now I would say Chiefs 49ers. Interesting. So you think Chiefs beat the Ravens? Yeah, I do. That would be a great Super Bowl. I like it.

I don't know. There are a lot of really good matches there. Unfortunately, I don't think your team has the firepower to get there. I think I agree with you. You're going to get no argument here. Okay, let's guess the lines. Let's do it. This is a Shakey's game.

We gather our fantasy team, whoever's left. I'm not going. Fighting all year. 20-year friendships. Almost going down the drain, but we gather at Shakey's. We watch the first game on Saturday, 435 Eastern Buffalo at Houston, both 10 and six. I'm a child of divorce who is fortunate enough to have a happy marriage.

And the fantasy league is the single most dysfunctional group dynamic that I have right now. It started again last week. Damashack won our league. He went eight and eight. You were furious. You were like attacking him. I thought I'm having fun

because maybe I went too far. Maybe I misread it. But I lost to the 5-8 playoff team. You guys are yelling at each other. My Monday, it's like it's holiday week. You guys are firing barbs at each other. Christmas is the next day.

Yeah, I know. We're so dysfunctional. I don't look at the calendar. You know, it's all very focused when I argue. I feel like him really set the tone with his performance at the draft. He did, right? He was just so sarcastic and hostile.

Not very FBI agent-y of him. No, it wasn't. It wasn't very FBI agent-y. So we have Buffalo playing in Houston. And I think I picked, what did I pick? Texans by four and a half? I think you said five. Texans by five.

I had put this right in the Vegas zone. I didn't know what to make of this game. I thought I knew exactly what to make with it. I was closer. I said three. I said, these are two 10 and six teams. I'll give Houston a three-point home field advantage and nothing else. Cause I think Buffalo is actually better. And the odds makers have it at three and a half. I guess that's fair. I really do think Buffalo is better. I think

they're going to grind them out. They're going to talk, they're going to play a game much like you just described that what Tennessee would have to do if they went to Baltimore. But I need they're better overall. I need to know exactly what I'm getting from Will Fuller in this game. Because it really does feel like however healthy he is completely determines what's going to happen in a Texans game.

The worst thing would be betting on the Texans thinking he's healthy and then the second quarter they just show him on the sideline with three people working on his leg. It's like, oh, Will Fuller's out. Great. Again, on out. Great. On Hopkins. I would free him up. I also like Buffalo and I think they're good.

It really scares me to bet on Josh Allen on the road in a playoff game. I think he's ready. That violates I think four of my playoff manifesto rules. Alright. Not to mention, when was the last time Buffalo won a playoff game? Well, they didn't win but they went to Jacksonville and I think they lost 9-0

two years ago when they made the playoffs right and it was like a moral victory well were they getting 9 and they lost a close game I think they covered and that felt like a win that's right they didn't lose 9-0 but other than that it's going back into like the 1990s right

yeah probably yeah it's been a into the 1990s, right? Yeah, probably. Yeah. Yeah, it's been a while. They have a lot of baggage. Houston is my kryptonite team. I've been wrong on them over and over again. Well, I'm wrong on Buffalo all the time, but now I'm siding with them. I saw enough at them.

Maybe that close game against the Patriots now doesn't mean as much as I thought it did last week. When are we going to get Corolla's picks? Maybe that'll swing my vote either way. You made me look for Marshawn Lynch's over-under rushing yards today for about 20 minutes. I was like, all right, I can't find this. And you're not going to bet it anyway. So why do I care? I'm surprised you didn't have the Pat's Money line.

So then Saturday night, New England. It's fun. I went low, but I probably should have gone higher because I think this is where the line will end up. I picked Pats by three and a half, but it probably didn't start there. I went way high because they're the Pats, and I kind of figured they'd get this night game. I said six.

It's four and a half, so this one's yours. I think that's fair. Let the public bet it to six or three or three and a half, whatever they want to do. Here's the thing, Sal. If you remove the uniforms and all of our baggage with each team and you're just talking talent versus talent, matchup versus matchup,

this is a nightmare matchup for the Patriots. Yeah, but you can't do that. You have to consider everything. You can absolutely run on the Patriots. You can move the ball on the Patriots. And on the other side of the fence, they always seem to have trouble when they play against people

that used to be in their infrastructure and understand what they do. This Tennessee team has a lot of people with Patriot ties, including the head coach. I'm not as, you know, do you think Josh Allen can't win on the road? I think Ryan Tannehill is going to have a tough time. I think it all comes to a head here.

I think I'm going to go back to my analogy with the chargers last year i thought they would run all over the patriots that defense which wasn't as good i don't think but um it didn't happen you shut them down because you're the patriots and it was foxborough i hope you're right the derrick henry part of this really scares you'll see you're gonna convince yourself you're gonna as a wednesday you're gonna be like what's this are Are you kidding me? The line is only four and a half? Come on. We're betting everything.

Let's go to Nephew Kyle as a tiebreaker. Kyle, how worried are you? Let's go one to ten. I think it's over. Oh, come on. Yeah, I'm telling you. This is really dark times right now for the dynasty. It's not good.

On the other hand, you were 11-1. How did you not get the bye? You were 11-1. Well, I thought it was telling that the last time they didn't get a bye was 2009 because that season reminds me a lot of this season where we kind of knew they didn't have it, but the infrastructure,

we're just counting on it to eventually carry the day. And then the Ravens came in and they ran all over us and they absolutely kicked our ass. And the game was over in five minutes. That was the Ray Rice. That was the Ray Rice. And they, and I think this Titans team is wired very similar to them. I think they're delighted that they got the Patriots instead of the chiefs. They have to be, they have to be. And I'll tell you another thing. And this is, you and I, we watch football every week.

And I'm sure a lot of people do. I don't know if they're watching four or five games at once and all that stuff. By the end of the season, Henry was the best running back in the league. And A.J. Brown was probably

like one of the best seven receivers in the league. Yeah. Wouldn't you say? Wouldn't you put him, if you started from scratch, who would I want in a playoff game? He'd be one of the league? Yeah. Wouldn't you say? Wouldn't you put him, if you started from scratch, who would I want in a playoff game? He'd be one of the first seven picks.

So, it's not like this team is like Buffalo with Devin Singletary and you know, a bunch of guys who you wouldn't even want starting on your fantasy team. They have like real dudes. Just remember this doom and gloom

when you're asking me about the half point. I hope you're right. I hope you're right. I just try to be honest, both with myself and the audience. And well, being honest isn't the Patriots way. You're going to tighten things up. You're going to change the batteries in the spy cams by Thursday. You're going to have some inside information.

I'm all for the cheat. People think we cheat anyway. I hope we cheat. Whatever we need to do. Any edge. People think we cheat. Any edge we could get, I'm all for the cheat. People think we cheat anyway. I hope we cheat. Whatever we need to do. People think we cheat. Any edge we can get, I'm all for. All right, NFC. I can't believe they split this up.

I know. This is so weird. I guess it doesn't really matter because it's not CBS Fox all the way through all four, but Minnesota at New Orleans is the early Sunday game, which that surprises me too. I think I hit this one exact. I had Saints by seven and a half. You were close.

I said seven. It's eight. I thought that's a little high. God, they're dying for us to tease them. They're begging for it, actually. We are. We're doing it with the Bills. That's our winner.

So wait, what are the Titans right now? Four and a half. So you could tease the Saints to two and the Titans to ten and a half? But you're not going there. I'm not saying I would. You won't do it. Yeah. Do you think the Pats can score 27 points in that game?

I don't know if that's going to be, I think 21, 16 kind of thing. So that would have to be Tannehill just completely giving us the game. Cause the other, the other one interception. Yeah. The other problem with this Pats team,

although the field goal kicker has been pretty good lately, but, but not being able to dominate in the special team side like we have in the past has been another issue. It's everything, really. When do you see a legal shift or what did you get called for today?

All that stuff. Ben Watson, I don't know how many dumb, poor time penalties he has this year, but it's at least six. The one thing I will say, if Edelman looks next week like he did this week, it's going to be really tough for them to win because he doesn't really have anyone else he trusts. Kyle and I want them to unleash Harry.

We don't understand why there isn't four reverses in the game and swing passes and just get him the ball and let him break tackles. This is what he did in college. Yeah. I didn't think about the extra day might've helped Edelman. If this was a Sunday game, like it might've been. Yeah.

He, I felt like he got a concussion last week and they put him back in or he's good enough at pretending to, you know, to fake the signs that he has one, but he hasn't been the same since he took that hit. Right. So I don't know.

I don't know whether it's a shoulder. He's made up something else for sure. Do you think this Minneapolis miracle, it still resonates or this is going to be a good game? Is there a weirder rivalry than Saints-Vikings? How many playoff games have we had with these two? Yeah. I don't think the Vikings have it.

Yeah, because that was the Favre one, right? That was the crazy Favre game. Yeah, this is the bounty game. Right., because that was the Favre one, right? That was the crazy Favre game? Yeah, this was the bounty game. Right. And then it was the Miracle. Right. Did Booger ever figure out which team won the Miracle game or not? Booger, they convinced them it was a tie.

And that's as far as they're going to get with them. Somebody who was a Miracle for one of these two teams. It felt miraculous. Miracle. If Cook's not playing or if Cook's compromised, I don't see the roadmap. Yeah. Their defense is playing so well.

I know it's whatever. I mean, they took care of Cousins on Monday, and then Greer they just made look so, so silly today. I can't remember. Where do we land on? Is it good to be peaking heading into the playoffs or not? Well, I guess if you're playing week one in the playoffs, it's good, right? Yeah, I guess.

Maybe Baltimore has a slow first half, two weeks. All right, last one. Isn't it sad? We're down to four games a week for a couple weeks? Philadelphia hosting the Seattle Seahawks. I'm probably off on this, but I just couldn't see any scenario where the Seahawks weren't favored by at least three. I went Seahawks three and a half. Wow. No, you said two and a half, right? Oh, two and a half. It doesn't matter. I said Philly by one, and it is actually Philly by one.

You hit that? Yeah, I got it. So we split for the week 2-2 yeah I think I don't know I don't know if you can make Seattle fair I know they're 7-1 on the road and everything else and they already beat them this year but talk about peaking at the right time I think

Philly's kind of figuring it out with whatever limited pieces they have you mean with Boston Scott I forgot about him I was just going to tell you if Tessitore is announcing the pieces they have. You mean with Boston Scott! I forgot about him. I was just going to tell you, if Tessitore is announcing the Pats game, I would be so fucking mad. I can't hear. I'm going to be nervous

and tense enough. And then on top of that, if he's in fifth gear the whole game, I'm going to have to mute it. How much would we have to pay? Let's see. Okay, so that guy, we got 90, that guy, Mark, we got $91,000 for someone to watch a game with us.

Could we do this again and pay Tessitore to come over and call the Eagles game for us? In our living room? I don't think so. I don't think he probably likes us. All right. Maybe it'd be a calmer test for that one. I don't really love these games. There was other variations of round one that I thought were way more intriguing than what we ended up with.

Well, NFC did their job, I think. What do you mean? What were you looking for? I guess it's just the fact that the Eagles are actually in the playoffs is a bummer. Right. Yeah. Because they're just not the playoffs is a bummer. Right. Yeah. Because they're just not good. Your division was awful.

It was really a dumpster fire. And somebody had to win. And somebody did. And the Eagles made it. They showed a lot of heart. Kudos to them. I love the Doug Peterson coaching job. I love the whole next man up mentality.

But it's the playoffs. Like, we only have 12 playoff teams. I just can't believe they're hosting a playoff game. All right. Well, you know, they were 9-7, right? They weren't 5-11. No, I know. I've always cried about this all year long.

I just don't think they're very good. How many times did the AFC South winner go 9-7 to take the division? We didn't hear a word about it. Don't make me defend the Eagles. I hate them. You just defended the Eagles. America heard you. cut that out too. And then Texans bills is,

I wish like the Texans were playing somebody that had more of a shootout possibility than that. Pat's Titans would be the best of these four games. I think that'll be fun. Yeah. Texans bills was set in stone like week nine, I think by like Halloween that was set. All right. Let's let's do Parent Corner.

As always, Parent Corner is brought to you by CarMax. You can get started at CarMax.com and explore 50,000 CarMax certified vehicles nationwide with search filters that make it easy to narrow down options, especially the ability to search by budget. Nobody knows this better than Nephew Kyle. This is how he found the ford mustang that is now a major part of his life what did you name the ford mustang yet i did but more importantly i

got a pair of dice you did yeah a dice like hanging from the rearview mirror oh that's little gold dice that's fantastic what'd you name the car it's maxine there's no other name maxine there carmella but i'm going well Maxine. Kyle found Maxine at CarMax. They ruled out millions of vehicles with their vetting process to select only the best to become CarMax certified. Kyle could even look at the Mustang's vehicle history

report on CarMax.com. Did not have the name Maxine in the vehicle history report and learn about the car. All that stuff. He went and test drove it. He picked it out. He signed up for the additional CarMax 90-day, $4,000 limited warranty. But then also, he got MaxCare, too. Signed up for that.

He appreciated that he had options based on the deductible and mileage that felt right for him. We'll talk a little bit more about that car after we do Parent Corner. Sal, you have the floor. All right. Well, I might as well well go right to uh christmas morning i got a 14 year old very appreciative of everything and the

other two are kind of bratty uh 12 year old and six year old tomorrow uh five year old turned six and they open like 15 presents each you know we're very blessed everyone they get we have a lot of cousins and everything so the gifts are coming in all say from santa on it you know, we're very blessed. Everyone, they get, we have a lot of cousins and everything. So the gifts are coming in all say from Santa on it, you know, Santa, this Santa, that, um, everyone believes not, not the 14 year old, but the 12 year old still believes. And then a six year old for sure believes. And all we need is a picture of them by the tree after everything. And after they open these gifts, um, I'm like, all right, let's get a picture and they're like oh but the two younger ones like dad enough already just get out of our faces

i was like you sons of bitches you i can't even count how much money and how much rapping and everything else goes on and i was like hey we got you all these gifts the least you could do is take a picture and the 12 year old is like you didn't get them for us santa did i was like that's it i'm doing it i'm blowing the lid right off you're 12 years old you can't you can't do i'm not i'm not i'm not i have to tell him first of all this kid has had access to porn he's seen porn online all right and i and he believes in that and santa i don't think there's an overlap i don't think you can believe in both that and Santa. I don't think there's an overlap. I don't think you can believe in both. I really don't. I don't think there should be one day where you've witnessed pornography by accident and believe also in Santa. And I was ready. And

she was holding me back, my wife, like Mick was holding Rocky back when the statue was unveiled and he was going after Clubber Lang outside there. And I really, I was going to blow the whole Santa thing, but I showed some restraint and I held back and we got the picture and it's a shitty picture and shitty kids. There you go. Happy holidays. You didn't get us anything. What do you say to that? It is funny to have the holidays where you have a lot more time with your family.

Yeah. And then you need a holiday more time with your family. Yeah. And then you need a holiday from the holiday. Right. Yeah. Can you guys go to school on December 26th? Because that's where I'm dropping you off. The best thing my son and I did was we watched the entire season four of Friday Night Tykes on Netflix.

Oh, really? Have you watched the show? No. It's incredible. Friday Night Tykes. Don't do another show. What is it? No. It's incredible. Friday Night Tykes. Don't do another show. What is it? No, no, no.

You watch one and you'll watch all 10 in like four hours. All right. It's like youth football in Texas. Oh, really? Okay. I'll see that. Peanut Butter Falcon was a good recommendation. We'll get to another one afterwards, but thank you for that.

Friday Night Tykes season four, it's just the coaching staffs. Season four? Yeah, this is the season my son wanted to watch. The coaching staffs could not be more inappropriate. There's rivalries within the coaching staffs.

There's people yelling at each other. They're dropping F-bombs and MFs and all this stuff in front of these 11-year-olds. And my son loved this offensive coordinator, one of the team. The head coach kept second-guessing the offensive coordinator and the offensive coordinator.

Just let me call the plays, man! Just let me stop breathing down my neck! So then my son just walks around and imitates the offensive coordinator from season four of Friday Day Techs. So congrats to that guy. That's not my parent corner, though. Last year, we went back.

The Simmons family, my dad's family, my dad has six brothers and sisters. They celebrate Christmas every year because their parents are dead and they're just a very close Irish family. So last year, we actually went back. We surprised my dad and we crashed the Yankee Christmas swap. We brought gifts and they ended up, they had some extra gifts. So we're all in it. And it goes around and Ben a year ago gets this gift that includes these scratch cards.

And he's all excited about the scratch cards. So it goes through the whole order. And then after, as you know, the Yankee swap, then it goes, then you count down in reverse. And if you don't like your gift, you can swipe it as it goes from like 23. The white elephant, you call it Yankee swap? Or whatever, we call Yankee swap, it's white elephant.

So it's going backwards from 23 to one. He's holding his scratch cards. He's just about to cards. Like he's just about to do it. And with like five spots to go, my cousin, Lauren, it's her turn. And she goes over and swaps gifts with Ben. It takes the scratch cards, which ethically was pretty dubious. I felt like, I think like over, maybe under age 13, you, you kind of don't take the kid's gift. Would it would have been my role takes the gift. So now Ben has no scratch cards and Ben's devastated, but pretending he's not, but more, more importantly, knowing him and knowing that

he can fly off the handle. I'm not worried. He's going to like have like fly off the handle and start to start being being the offensive coordinator of Friday Night Tykes and just go nuts. He reigns it in. Then on the way home, he's like, I'm never going to Yankee Swap again. Sucks. I hate Cousin Lord. That's bullshit.

And he's just furious. So we calm him down. So then he's talked about it for the whole year about how he wants to go back to Yankee Swap and take Lauren's gift. How old is cousin Lauren? She's like in her mid-30s. Oh, great. She's your cousin. It's my cousin, yeah.

She's in her early 30s. So for a year, he's like, it's vacillated between I'm never going back. No, I hate the Simmons family too. I want to go back. I'm going to take Lauren's gift. Right. Cause he's a maniac. So then we, this is why he's ordering knives on Amazon. Yeah. He tried to bring those on the plane. Um, so we didn't know we were going to go back.

And then last minute we decided we'd go back. So we go back, but the catch is cousin Lauren, she's not at Yankee Swap. So now Ben can't get revenge. Right. Yankee Swap happens. Lauren's brother ends up getting scratch cards.

Ben, on the way back, takes the scratch cards from Lauren's brother and gets the revenge and is acting like it's this is the 86 Red Sox going back into Shea and taking the World Series gets the scratch cards back

and is now like riding high ever since because he is a lunatic so yeah the little nice holiday family story for you and I'm gonna guess under $2.50 That's great. So yeah, the little nice holiday family story for you. And I'm going to guess, oh, under $2.50, one on those scratch cards. One, $2 out of like $50 of scratch cards. Good call.

So there you go. Yeah. Gotta love the holidays. A couple of heartwarming holiday stories for you. That was Parent Corner presented by CarMax. Don't forget, CarMax.com. You can start there to explore 50,000 CarMax certified vehicles

nationwide. At CarMax the price is based on the car, not your negotiating skills. There's never any haggling or pressure to buy. They even have a 7-day money-back guarantee, which Kyle took advantage of. A full week to make sure you like every little thing about the car that you just got. Limited warranty as well, which Kyle took advantage of. A full week to make sure you like every little thing about the car

that you just got. Limited warranty as well, which covers 90 days or 4,000 miles. The major systems on the vehicle. Whichever comes first. And you can also select an optional MaxCare service plan for additional coverage. And you can be like Kyle with Maxine. Check it out at carmax.com.

What do you got to plug? Well, first of all, real quick, Uncut Gems. I'm not going to trash it. First of all, great podcast. Probably the podcast of the year. You, Garnett, Sandler. I love the movie. I was so excited by it.

I thought they made every scene intense, even if it didn't need to be. It reminded me of like from the helicopter, when the helicopter's chasing Henry Hill from that point on, that's what Unconjured Gems was. And I just loved him owing money to everyone and pawning everything. If you haven't seen it, I'm probably going to ruin a little bit, but the bet killed me. The bet at the end just killed me. The parlay. The first time in Francesa, not good. So are we going, let's go spoiler alert until my daughter comes on later in this podcast there you go spoiler just for two minutes i'm just gonna say

i i can't believe why don't they run this by someone for 10 grand they could have a consultant say that this is not the way you could do that we would have read the script for free right and we would have said no you can't have someone make $120,000 bet Mohegan Sun, which probably takes a $2,500 minimum on a straight bet, let alone a parlay with Kevin Garnett to win the tip, to win the tip for him to get over like nine and a half rebounds and for the Celtics to win the game. That's stacking. That's Joe House-like. That's what he likes to do. you can't it just took me out it was worse than that i thought wasn't it also you had to win the first half too

did they have to win the first that yeah yeah he had i think he had to win the first half too the celtics it was something like celtics win the first half and the game which i don't think is allowed right no none of it is it's because no one's betting the other way you know like there's no other money to take from that. Right. Oh, it just drove me nuts. It drove me nuts. Well, this goes back to my dream for the last 10 years of starting a sports movie consultant service, which the reason you would never actually start one is because you'd only be

used one time a year. And I don't think you'd make enough money to survive. You wouldn't be able to pay an assistant even. But this is where they would call the Ringer Sports Movie Consultant Service and be like, hey, does this parlay look good to you guys? And be like, actually, you can't really do that. You're not allowed to do that.

And you wouldn't bet Garnett to win the tip. It doesn't matter that he's even taller than whoever his tip, like that's such a, like, okay, I was on board with the whole idea that this gemstone gave him superpowers during the game. I was fine. I was okay with that. And just make the gem worth $2 million and then make that the bet. Not some crazy parlay that doesn't exist. Well, I have some terrible news for you, speaking of movies. What is it?

I've done a 180 on The Irishman. Oh, come on. Yeah. You think it's too short? That's a 180. I watched it again. No, you didn't. I did. What do you have the time for this? I did. Well, I had the time because I flew

cross-country from Boston, LA yesterday. Which country? Russia? I flew from Iceland, LA yesterday. Which country? Russia? I flew from Iceland to LA yesterday. Yeah, I wanted to give it... I had enough people in my life who I respect who was adamant that the movie has to be watched

where you're not doing anything else other than concentrating 100% on the movie. I felt like I did that. Yeah. I picked up a lot of stuff the second time, and it's still... Could they have shaved a little time off? Sure, but I get it

now. I really liked it the second time, and I get it now. I've reconsidered my take. Well, your take was that it was too long, so it was still too long. My take was that it was an hour too long and I didn't like the ending. Yeah.

But the ending made more sense the second time. I think there was so much going on the first time, I think my brain just got overloaded. Really? And I needed to really concentrate. With the CGI and I was getting my... I just wasn't concentrating on the right things. Do you think Jimmy Hoffa should have bet that Garnett would have under nine and a half rebounds?

Pacino's really good. Yeah, he's solid. It's weird that Pesci became the guy that everybody's pointing to as the one with the best Academy Award chance. Because I actually thought Pacino has some great scenes. But I think that this will be a movie that five years from now, we will both have seen at least 10 times. Well, I don't think it's possible. Why?

Let's see. It takes eight months to watch it once. So could we see it 10 times in five years? Yeah, maybe we could. It's got a lot of good scenes. All right. Yeah, that's what happens when you make a six-hour movie. It's going to have...

It is what it is. I think I'm in. I can't... It's a rare 180 for me, but I think I... I think I was too hasty the first time. And I don't think

I watched it correctly. I did not watch it in the right setting the first time. I will watch it again because it's an important movie. It really is important. And there's more going on

than just the movie itself. But it really is like when you're talking about the trilogy and Goodfellas Casino and then this movie and the whole aging thing and where Scorsese is in his life and where De Niro and Pacino are in their lives in real life and putting them in that. You talk about that trilogy. This is Godfather 3 compared to those two, right?

This has really good scenes. Wow. I got to say, I was... Better than Casino? Because I know you're not touching Goodfellas with this. No. I think it's a logical third.

Yeah. The more I look at it. The CGI still bothers me and still seems fake to me. Right. And the stomping scene is unforgivable. They're right. They can't do that. In general,

it just is never convincing. You can never really tell what De Niro's age is other than his hair is darker. But you definitely watch it again because there's some stuff that you and I really, really like that is in this movie that I think the more you see it,

the more you would kind of call back. Even the wives, the cigarette smoking in the car. I know it all looked good and it was fun and it was great seeing them together, but I just thought it was 10 years, made 10 years too late.

Well, that might be true though. I'm not arguing that, but I'm glad it exists. I think it's going to win the Oscar. All right. I'll look at it again. Damn it. I thought I could have it exists. I think it's going to win the Oscar. All right. I'll look at it again. Damn it. I thought I could have four hours.

Just do one. Do like a 10 at night when everyone's in sleep. Just shut everything out. Just put three and a half hours into it. 10 at night to 4.30 in the morning. All right. I'll do it. All right, Sal.

Lock it in Monday through Friday, 4.30 to 5.30 Eastern. I would have been champ again if not for your damn Patriots. I had them on a money line parlay. Of course, that's the story. It's Todd Furman. And that's that. Oh, against all odds, we're going to go over a lot of season-long prop bets, individual players.

I'm going to prove to you that betting under on every individual player prop is profitable if you have the time. Maybe just do it next time you're watching, what do you call it? The Irishman. I'll do bet the props on the Irishman. I'll go under on all of them. There you go. Great job in 2019 by you. Good job by you, buddy.

All right, don't go yet because my daughter is coming on to do a special 2019 year-end edition of For Realsies. I'm stepping in for Liz Kelly doing it on this pod. All the stuff that mattered in teen culture. It is Parent Corner, Come to Life. But before we do that,

I wanted to tell you and remind you, The Rewatchables, Monday afternoon, Quentin Tarantino, the first of a three-part Tarantino trilogy on The Rewatchablespart Tarantino trilogy on the rewatchables. Three movies that he picked that we broke down. It's all coming Monday afternoon. Subscribe to the rewatchables right now. You can do it as you're listening to this podcast.

All right, let's bring in my daughter. All right, my daughter is here. Since we did Parent Corner all year on this podcast, I thought we'd have an actual kid on here. My daughter, Zoe, who does four reels. He's usually on the Ringer Dish feed, but since it's the end of 2019, we're going to do it here. All right.

So Rembrandt and I did Who Won the Year on the podcast. We picked, who do we end up, Kawhi Leonard beat Zendaya in the finals. Oh, really? And Zendaya had beaten Billie Eilish in an earlier bracket. I'd like to know your reasoning because I was going to choose Zendaya for my person. It's Zendaya. What did I say? Zendaya.

I was going with Zendaya this whole year. Really? Yeah. Yeah. It's okay. Continue. Well, there you go. You have Billie Eilish? Yeah. I chose billy eilish what is the reasoning

because she's just been the break star of this year like everyone knows who billy eilish is and her music has been so influential and she's a teenager so she's more relatable to at least people within my age group and everyone loves her music she's just like a universal artist and she's cool i was surprised that she seems to really the stuff she's doing seems to really resonate with kids because people have so many issues with insecurities and she kind of just like cuts that out of her music her style she doesn't use her appearance as what makes her interesting it's all about her music and with her outfits and stuff. Like she wears outfits that are three times too big for her.

So she doesn't show her figure and things like that. So I just find her really cool. Okay. What was your favorite Billie Eilish song? When the party's over, probably. Do you think she has legs? What does her career look like 10 years from now? I don't mean like physical legs.

Like how Taylor Swift kept reinventing herself. Yeah, well, Taylor Swift had like some dropout years where things just kind of went downhill for her. Yeah. I mean, I don't know because Billie's huge right now. Like she's huge. I feel like she might end up taking a break and then like making a really sick album and coming out with it in a couple years

because I don't think she's just going to push things out to push things out and keep herself in the loop I feel like she's someone who cares about her music too much to do that so she might take a break and make some really good music and then come out with it being strong rather than just producing half music I do worry about, the burnout potential there because it seems like she's been going strong for a couple of years though. That's true. Yeah. No breakout stars for you? TikTok? Any TikTok stars? No. I don't like the fact that there are celebrities within TikTok or people that have the hype. Like TikTok is supposed to be random. And I don't like that there are these people that are now becoming bigger within it.

Like influencers. Give me one person who became bigger. Charlie D'Amelio. Oh, I don't know who that is. And then Lil Huddy. Lil Huddy? Yeah. It was like musically.

There was Jacob Sartorius and like Baby Ariel and people like that. They were the influential, bigger celebrities within the app. Yeah. And we were avoiding that for a good amount of time with TikTok. And then people started getting the hype. And I don't like it as much anymore. Well, one person who hasn't become big within the app is your brother, Ben.

Which really doesn't make sense to me, quite honestly. His TikToks are so... I don't even know what to say i'm totally happy with him not having followers you have uh snapchat as your app of the year yeah but tiktok as kind of the breakout app of the year even though tiktok's been around this is like the first huge tiktok year yeah because musically it was like it's you know it's stepping stone yeah and then tiktok came around which is like the first huge TikTok year. Yeah. Because Musical.ly was like it's, you know, it's stepping stone. Yeah. And then TikTok came around, which is like the better version of Musical.ly and kind of Vine combined.

So it was Musical.ly and Vine together. And now it's like this super app. How would you explain TikTok to people listening right now who either have kids or who don't understand what TikTok is in like two sentences? Can I say it as if they knew what Vine was? Yeah. Okay. So it's basically the extended version of Vine where you can have up to 60 second videos and you can use your own sound and like make your own little skits or you can use the app's noises that they already have and make your own skits to it. Like you can make memes out of these sounds that they have. They can be sounds from movies or sounds from TV shows or memes or whatever it may be. And you can take these noises and then make it your own and like percept it.

But you still like Snapchat more because that allows you to... They're completely different apps because that's more of a social app where I communicate with people and TikTok's entertainment, I would say. Where you communicate in secret with people. In secret? Yeah, I sat next to you on an airplane yesterday and all you were doing was sending weird selfie

pictures to your friends. It's because iMessage is kind of more irrelevant now. Like, I only use it to communicate with family members. Yeah. And Snapchat's just a lot easier and faster. And you can, I do the 24-hour saving chats so I can remember what was happening.

You can save your chats and then it will like, that's the max that you can save it to. Yeah. But I've talked to my friends about this and it's just a lot easier to communicate with people because it's so much quicker. No didn't say anything oh you thought kyle was judging me i would say how often do you have to say i forgot what you just said though i save all my chats okay i yeah i save them so i remember what i said unless it's like how many times can you

send a stupid selfie to one of your friends and then have them send a stupid selfie of themselves? It can be a lot. Before that gets boring though. I mean, if it gets boring, then you just leave one or the other unopened. Someone's mildly hurt and you move on with your life. What about, explain the Snapchat streaks to me. Oh, see, I don't even understand streaks that much either

because it's not like it benefits your Snapchat in any way. It's just it's a number and you'll send like an S in the morning and an S at the night in a picture. And it will like count every day that you do that. And I guess the point is just to like have a long streak. I don't understand it either. I don't do streaks. It's idiotic. It's idiotic.

I don't think streaks are smart. Is there a time with Snapchat where people just grow out of it? What's the age range? Kyle, you don't use Snapchat, do you? Yeah, but did you use it at one point in your life? Yeah, but it was like brand new.

See, I'm hearing, I was talking to Liz Kelly about this, and her younger brother uses Snapchat like all the time. And I don't remember how old her brother was, but he was like within the older of Gen Z. Well, for six hours on an airplane yesterday, you vacillated between Instagram and Snapchat while you also watched a movie. Yeah. Yeah. I didn't see you read one page of a book. Okay. We were going to purchase a book at the store and then we didn't. I just worry about your generation. I worry about my generation too.

Does your generation read books? I read books. If you saw somebody holding a book, would you be like, what's that? Why do you have that? I actually was complimented by my teacher about how much I read. Oh, God. Well, if you're reading a lot for your class, that's a sad sign for your class. Okay.

Jesus. Your breakout entertainment app of the year, Disney+. What an addition to the Simmons family. Disney+, is just incredible. And I'm so thankful that it is a thing. What's been your favorite thing about it? All the old shows? Yeah, because it's so nostalgic, like 2020s around the corner and the generation's ending, quote unquote. And it has all my shows that I watched from when I was really little. The shows that I was banned from watching like Jesse, because I was too sassy. Wizards of Waverly Place. I've binged through all of it. Good luck, Charlie. Incredible. Yeah. But if we had let you keep watching Jesse, imagine how sassy Ben would have become.

Ben? What do you mean, Ben? Oh, wait, that didn't work at all. Wait, you don't have a generation yet. A generation doesn't form until it's like 20. I don't know. You're not in a generation yet. On TikTok, all it says is like, the generation's ending. Your childhood's over.

Boomers. But one show that Disney Plus has just brought to my life, I was never like a religious watcher of the high school musicals. Like I watched them maybe once or twice, but I was never like that wasn't a huge part of my childhood. I just never watched it. I don't know why. I probably would have loved it.

But High School Musical, the musical, the series has become probably my favorite TV show. Really? Yeah. How many episodes of that? I mean, I've watched all of them. They come out like weekly or every four to five days or something. Well, you've seen every rom-com ever. You've run out of rom-coms.

There was some rom-com on the plane. What was it called? Plus One? Yeah. And you just saw the title and you knew exactly what was going to happen. So I'm proud. You're only plane. What was it called? Plus One? Yeah. And you just saw the title and you knew exactly what was going to happen. So I'm proud. You're only 14 and you've already figured it out. Yeah. I know all the little anecdotes and things that go on within the movie. I just can read them now. I told you what movie to do. What do you mean? When you write

your first movie. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. We did talk about that on the live stream. Two ninth graders who make a pact that 20 years from now, if they're not married, they have to marry each other. And then it goes back and forth between the 15-year-olds and then the older adult actors. Yeah, I feel like that really would be a successful movie. That probably was a movie. I'm probably stealing that idea from a movie that already happened.

But I feel like here's the thing. Netflix needs to get on a movie that will meet something like that because i feel like there's always a little twist that i'm not completely interested in like it will be a basketball cook or like the the tall girl she's just super tall like i feel like i need more of just a completely basic love story movie what's your last favorite netflix movie the one that terrible one in the snowstorm? What was that one? What was the one where there was a snow, it was snow day?

What? Noel? Let It Snow. Oh. Yeah. Let It Snow. Yeah. That is a good one.

You watched that movie like four times. Yeah. But that's not an all around year movie where I can just watch it like midsummer. I need a movie that I can just watch it like mid-summer. I need a movie that I can just watch 24-7. That's why The Kissing Booth was such a huge deal for me because I could watch it whenever. And that movie is so easy to watch. I could half watch, know exactly what's going on. The first time I saw it, I read the movie, but I need more. Like I need more like that. That's so easy. So Netflix should be making these like every three weeks. Yeah. Just keep pouring them out. I

feel like it's not that hard. I mean, it is is hard but like you don't need to make your plot so intricate for me like you can just make it super basic and i'll enjoy the movie maybe they should make a movie about this girl who finds a boyfriend and she just tortures him by watching terrible movies with them every friday okay whoa i did not need to be attacked there. Netflix, you had listed Stranger Things, Kissing Booth, Big Mouth, Alexa and Katie, To All the Boys I've Loved Before. And the sequel that's coming around on February 12th. But then the sequel is the next big one.

Yeah, February 12th. I've never been more excited. I'm honestly like literally so excited. What is going to be the sequel? See, I didn't... To All the Other Boys I've Lo been more excited. I'm honestly like literally so excited. What is going to be the sequel? See, I didn't. To all the other boys I've loved before? To more of the boys I've loved before? I don't understand.

How is there a sequel to that? I mean, it kind of left on a closing note, which I didn't read the second book. I read the first book, which was the movie. So I don't know what's going to happen from there. But it ended on a closing note. They were on the lacrosse field. They kissed and it just ended with a wide shot. So it's continuing

their story. I guess. But I feel like there needs to be that hook. The first movie had that hook and I don't know what they're going to do for the second one. So Netflix or Disney Plus, you can only have one for 2019, which you pick? I can only have one. Yeah.

But I like things from each. But if I told you you could do the year over again, but you only have one of those two, which one was more important? I would say Netflix. Yeah, Netflix, because I had that throughout the majority of the year. I didn't have Disney Plus the whole year. I think you get mad at my questions. Because that's like

an annoying question. Well, I'm asking you to pick it up. See, but here's the difference between Netflix and Disney Plus. When I'm watching Disney Plus, it's like a relay of everything my childhood, like memories. Right.

And Netflix is more of like a mature show, I would say. Or like a mature audience. It's older people. You watched the one where the the kids came back from the school bus trip and nobody in the town was left and then they had to form their own society oh my god what was that one that show wasn't totally appropriate what do you mean yeah it was what was that show called wasn't it the society wasn't it yeah the society yeah you

like that show i can't believe i forgot about that show that show was incredible i blew through that you you props to my friends for making me watch it that show's great um you were upset that there were no good horror movies in 2019 yeah see for the simmons family and i'm sure a bunch of families out there horror movies are our staple that's what we do together that's one of the many ways we bond yeah and i didn't feel like there was a kicker this year that was like oh my god that movie it seems like there's a lot of ones coming though yeah starting like the grudge is coming out in january i feel like 2019 was kind of like the poop year for horror movies and they were giving us a little break because they're going to slam us in the next couple of years is what I'm hoping. I saw that there's a potential another Annabelle

coming out. Oh my God. That's so exciting to me. I liked when we were on the plane and Ben was watching Annabelle. I was too. Oh, you were watching it too? Yeah. I like when he watches horror movies on the plane. Like he's not enough of a psycho. No, but it's amazing to watch horror movies on the plane because there's like that little turbulence and there's enough people around you so that you're not completely terrified and feel comfortable watching it on your own it's it's a good experience so was ninth grade what how is it different than how movies represent ninth grade or tv shows well i feel like I have a different viewpoint on this because I go to an untraditional high school.

Yeah. But a universal comment that I could make, I guess, is the seniors aren't mean to the freshmen. So you think that's a movie gimmick? That's just a movie thing. There's a divide, obviously. The seniors kind of don't really care about the freshmen. No, they just don't talk to us.

It's not like they're being rude. They just don't care. You're not on their radar. No. They wouldn't put their time and energy into tormenting a freshman. It doesn't work like that. Maybe it was like that.

Even Kyle's high school was like that. He tortured all the freshmen. I got tortured my first day. Maybe that's the freshmen. Oh, I got tortured. My first day. Maybe that's more of like a, I don't know. But that doesn't exist anymore. At least within my school and my friends' schools. So you're disappointed there's not more hazing and intimidation? No, I'm not disappointed.

I'm just saying. That was inaccurate. Like I was afraid of the seniors going into high school. And they're super, I don't know why I was afraid of the seniors going into high school and they're super, I don't know why I was afraid of the seniors at my high school, but. Well, you had that because you were playing soccer and you're in the varsity team and the seniors, that whole dynamic. But then everyone eventually, it doesn't matter what grade you're in. Yeah, it really doesn't.

It's fine. You got used to it. Yeah. What else? That's it? That's the only other thing? I feel like that was the huge thing that I was looking for. Why did you want to talk about cancel culture?

Because that's been huge this year. Like James Charles, probably one of the kings of YouTube for a good year, just completely under the radar, gone now. What did he do? He had that whole controversy with Tati. How would I know what that was? I'm just saying. What was the controversy?

Him and Tati were best friends. Yeah. And she had this sugar hair vitamin company that he said he wouldn't promote on his channel because he just didn't want to promote something that wouldn't be appropriate for his viewers. But then he promoted her highest competitor's company on his story. Because they helped him get a VIP pass at Coachella. Because he was in a crisis. Yeah. Quote unquote.

And needed a VIP pass. And they offered to give him a pass if he promoted them. So then Tati got mad because that's her biggest competitor. And he said he wouldn't promote her item because it wasn't appropriate for his viewers and this got him canceled yeah this got him canceled what is going on how is that a cancel because tati and also everyone sided with tati yeah because she made these videos and how do you spell tati t-a-t-i c-a-t- Okay. I'm pretty sure. But she made all these videos and also she talked about

some controversial things that James did where he was hitting on straight men and stuff because they were so close. He did the stuff in front of her and never thought that it would like come back, I guess.

I'm not saying this is true. I'm just saying this is what I heard. This is what? Yeah, this is the story. This is the story. You have no idea if it's true. This is the alleged story. Yes. And it all came out once. They were enemies. yeah this is the story this is the story you have no idea if it's true this is the alleged story yes

and it all came out once they were enemies and that was it and everybody sided with her yeah so he got cancelled

who else got cancelled and now James is gone I mean multiple people have gotten cancelled but come back like so it sounds like real life because this is happening with adults

still in real culture yeah Tana Mongeau she I can't believe what happened culture. Yeah. Tana Mongeau. I can't believe what happened to her. She had TanaCon, which went completely downhill. TanaCon? What was that?

Trash her for a little bit. I don't really know the full story about TanaCon, but TanaCon was like an event she was having. Meet and greet sort of thing. And she promised all of this stuff. It was almost like Fyre fire festival but much smaller and tana con version right i assume and she like just kind of screwed all these people over and everyone was really mad about it and she got canceled for a little bit but came back jeffree star gets canceled all the time he got involved with the james charles controversy like saying bad things about james and they kind of got into it and Shane sided with Jeffrey. So it was just like this whole YouTuber drama.

What is it about your generation that everybody wants to be some sort of celebrity online? Because it looks appealing from the outside. Yeah. Even you, we were in Boston and you hopped on the 4Realz's Instagram account and you were we were in boston and you hopped on the four realsies instagram account and you were just doing live q and a's with but that's what people but people have fun it's fun to do that i never thought you would like do stuff like that though why i don't know just never seen but you just like were bored and you just started talking to people well i just started asking they started asking questions and i wanted to answer their questions because I got bored. It's just, it's easy.

But I could see people on YouTube just like shooting their shot because there's nothing holding you back. It's like, it's not like you're going to be punished if you don't get famous. So why not try, you know? Right. And if something sticks and they get views,

then it's like almost this addictive thing. So you like the interactions. You don't care about the being. No, I don't care about. Building an building an audience no but that's what people look for yeah that's what like your yeah crazy brother would look for yeah nowadays like people make a lot of money off of youtube like a lot of money and just from creating videos and editing and stuff which is extremely hard it's like as It doesn't seem as hard as it is if you were someone like that.

But they make good amounts of money. It's kind of crazy how easy it can be to distribute. So that's why you're doing live chats on your For Realsies account? No, that's not why I am, but that's why it could be appealing to others. Should you start hawking TatiCon? For RealsiesCon?

TanaCon. You're so silly. Do For realsies Khan. Tana Khan. Tana Khan. You're so silly. Dude, for realsies Khan. For realsies Khan where I can screw a bunch of people over. Yeah. Yeah. That doesn't sound like a good idea. I guess the only other thing is you had the same boyfriend for five bucks though.

Was that a bad? I don't know. Kyle, are we surprised that this is still going? Are you surprised? I'll keep him out I'm staying out of this Kyle stay out of it it's rude

what's rude about it I'd like your opinion you went I'm both of y'all's producers you went from you weren't into Boys in Auto all of a sudden

you've had a boyfriend for five months I wasn't not into Boys in Auto I just didn't talk to you about it that's just what she told you dude yeah

I wouldn't talk to you about that yeah this is what I'm finding my big lesson in 2019 was my daughter hid stuff from me. It's not hiding stuff. Would you go to your parents every day and update them on your love life? I don't know. We spent a lot of time in the car. Yeah, but that's like an awkward thing to bring up.

You're kind of an intimidating guy. Says who? Your blue eyes says who. I see. It's scary. I'm afraid to have serious conversations with you sometimes Because it's like more intimidating than it is to have with mom Actually that's not true Well I'm not crazy like mom though

No I know She's scary She flies off the handle I'm always in control We've had good car rides this year I only got mad at you once Oh yeah I don't like when only got mad at you once. Oh, yeah.

I don't like when you get mad at me in the car because I can't escape. I just have to look out the window, sadly. It's usually justified. Yeah, that's true. But you're an overreactor sometimes. Sometimes. Sometimes. Yeah, we haven't had a lot of car rides lately,

so I never know what's going on with you. I know. Because your club season ended. Yeah. It's coming back. We have. So what are your big predictions for 2020 before we go? I feel like TikTok's going to blow up even more and then blow over

and they're going to make some sort of update to the app that everyone's not going to really like and then it's going to kind of get less popular because of that update. Unless they're smart. we'll see how they handle it um i feel like instagram's kind of going down under at least for me not down under because people still use it to post pictures and stuff but it's like not as much of a exploring entertainment it's more you're just talking about for teens not for everybody oh yeah well yeah but i feel like

people have gravitated towards snapchat and tiktok yeah because instagram isn't becoming an entertainment source at least for me anymore like i don't really go on the explore page and stuff like that like i only use it to look at my friends posts and stuff is there anything on the horizon that you feel like could bubble up i don't know i've fortnight no fortnight's dead fortnight's gone i was kidding i gladly i feel like that stage was far too long some people still use it though well it's going to be the big video game this year i don't feel like they'll come out with something new i mean some of us are in love with madden right now and screaming at the TV upstairs. Oh my God.

It's terrifying. He sounds like a truck driver. It's so toxic. You're going to miss him when you go off to college in three years. No, I know I'll miss him and he'll miss me too. You're going to be living on some dorm floor where nobody's going to be screaming like a maniac for half the night. And you with this poor kid, this poor random kid that he was playing with. He was screaming at him like he would scream at you if you messed up.

Like traumatizing this poor nine and a half year old. Oh my gosh. Yeah. We got to basically take video games out of his room, I think. Yeah. All right. So no more predictions for 2020. What was your celebrity relationship

of the year, just out of curiosity? That's a toughie. I'm shipping Natalie and David right now. They're not dating, but they're dating. You're predicting it. Yeah.

Okay. There you go. There's been a lot of signs unless they're teasing us and over-exaggerating and making it seem like they're dating for the clout, but I really have a feeling they're dating.

All right. We have to go. So follow, uh, even though you haven't been posting nearly enough, you're going to post more in 2020. Yeah. You're just using it more for like these,

these live videos. But I feel like that's more interactive and interesting. All right. Well, for realsies. Yeah. For realsies. Thanks Zoe.

You had a good 2019. I'm proud of you. I did. Thank you. Good, good job. I feel like 2020 even numbers will be more fun. Okay. We'll see. Yeah. Thanks, Zoe. You had a good 2019. I'm proud of you. I did. Thank you. Good job. I feel like 2020 even numbers will be more fun. Okay. We'll see. Bye. Bye. That's it for the BS. Coming up on Tuesday, we're going to have a little special Parent Corner 2019 Greatest Hits edition. And then one more big podcast this week. Don't forget about the rewatchables, the Tarantino trilogy starting on Monday.

And then Book of Basketball 2.0 is coming back strong starting next week. So that's all happening. Thanks to CarMax. Thanks to State Farm. Thanks to Nephi Kyle. And we will see you later in the week.

I don't have feelings with him on the wayside on the wayside I don't have to ever forget