The Bill Simmons Podcast - Rodgers' Resurrection, The Steelers-Browns Debacle, and Guess The Lines Week 2 (Ep. 412) | The Bill Simmons Podcast

Episode Date: September 10, 2018

HBO and The Ringer's Bill Simmons is joined by Cousin Sal to discuss Aaron Rodgers and The Packers' miraculous comeback, The Buccaneers walloping the Saints, The Steelers-Browns disappointing tie, and Bill and Sal's fantasy draft, before they guess the NFL lines for week 2. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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it. Special bonus guest announcer, me. Oh yeah, I'm in this. I did like three plus hours of guest announcing. I get sprinkled in. You'll be playing a game. All of a sudden, there I am. Guest analysis. Guest analysis-ist. Making some wisecracks. Talking hoops. Purchase the Xbox One NBA 2K19 bundle today. Finally, we're brought to you by TheRinger.com,

the best website on the planet, and The Ringer Podcast Network, the best podcast network on the planet. By the way, the rewatchables, we are dropping this overnight, Monday night, heading into Tuesday morning. Sean Fantasy and I did Rounders, 20th anniversary. Oh yeah, Rounders.

It's happening. This was an hour, 40 minutes long. And I'm surprised it wasn't two hours longer. Check that out. Rounders, the rewatchables. Subscribe to the rewatchables wherever you get your podcasts. Coming up, the cuz.

First Pearl Jam. All right, on the line right now, the cuz, Cousin Sal. He's doing this from home. He's getting ready. We were taping this Sunday night. He's getting ready. His show launches tomorrow on FS1. Lock it in. 4.30 East Coast time, 1.30 Pacific Coast time.

Talking gambling for a solid hour. I'm jealous. What do you mean you're jealous? Yeah, I don't like when you talk gambling with other people. I like to be the only person. Me and the trifecta. I thought that's it. We were sharing custody.

I have to tell you, this is not the perfect show for me because I'm used to being like 18 inches from you and, and talking like a human being. And this show by the third act, we're all screaming at each other, trying to make a point. So this is going to be a departure from what everyone's used to with me, I think. Well, welcome to TV. Yeah, I guess so. I guess that's it. So I par I texted you a parlay today. And I'm like, hey, Bears mudding line, plus 260. Putting it with the Rams, minus 220, plus 424.

I think the Bears have a chance. I was feeling really good, Sal. And you know what I forgot? I forgot Aaron Rodgers, even on one leg, is still one of the scariest people in the history of sports. So there you go. I wonder if you could bury him like they do in the sand and the beach. If you could just have his torso above ground, I think he would still do well, right? Yeah, he could throw for two TDs.

Nephew Kyle and I watched a game together, and then we drove into work to tape this. And we were listening to NFL radio and they went back to Lambeau where it was the play-by-play guy and Jason Taylor and they're recapping the game and Jason Taylor goes, I mean Aaron Rodgers, he made me a believer today. And Kyle and I were like,

what? You didn't believe in Aaron Rodgers that took this? Well, that was like six Hail Marys ago. The two Hail Marys of one season, the Super Bowl apparently wasn't enough to win over Jason Taylor. I don't even know where to begin. This was crazy to watch somebody on one leg.

I remember in 08, Phil Rivers, or 07, in the playoffs, Phil Rivers played on a torn ACL. There's a chance Rodgers has a torn ACL, and he's just like screw it I'm going to put a brace on it I'm playing anyway Michelle Tafoya was badgering him after the game

but not really asked him one knee question and Rodgers like hey you know the knee and I just came back out and I was like what's wrong with your knee what do you think is wrong with his knee sprain? I wouldn't be surprised if by the time this posted or tomorrow morning or Monday morning,

like we found out he was out for the year. Like you could be right. He could be playing on ACL injury and just got them the one win. And it's like, I'm sorry. There's no, there's nothing more. I just wanted to win this one game.

He said at the end of the interview, he's like, I'm playing next week. So, you know, maybe he's 35 years old and was just like, screw it. So Rogers is the story. He made

some great throws. It was a heroic performance, but the real hidden story was the bears just blowing this and doing the classic play not to lose, um, safe calls at the worst possible times. They had a third and one under three minutes left on the 14 yard line and basically end the game. Jordan Howard has a ton of momentum. He's been gashing the Packers the whole drive Packers defense looks gassed. And instead they call a pass play with Trubisky. They don't get it. That leads to the, uh, the game winning drive. Then the ball is in Trubisky's hands in Lambeau on Sunday night. And he had a look and demeanor and an accuracy about him that said, I can't believe I'm playing on the other end of this game with Aaron Rogers on NBC without Michael's calling this game. And he just fell apart.

And that was it. Can the bears come back from this? I don't know. I, like you said, there were like five times each team could have lost or won this game. That third-and-one play, that's either got to be Howard or Trubisky takes it himself or something. You don't want him dropping back to pass there. Kudos to the defensive end for covering, I guess it was Cohen, a flat or something. That was a great play. But let's not forget, like Rodgers, Fuller had an interception.

That could have ended the game for Rogers. Um, there was so much that went on, but you knew, you just knew that if the bears didn't go up by more than six Rogers, were they going to come back? Then you thought maybe they left too much time on the clock for a Trubisky. Um, but that didn't end up being the case. It turned out to be the right amount of time for Mr. And then Al Michaels, as usual, he's just,

when Al Michaels is in the building, you know, something crazy and memorable might actually happen. And right. He's not even phased anymore. It's just bouncing off him. Correct. Collinsworth was more amazed than Al Michaels was. It seemed like. I just can't. I, Trubisky to Rodgers seven different times during this game and probably needed some settled down juice, I think. Trubisky is not Aaron Rodgers.

I feel bad because Khalil Mack was clearly the star of the game for two and a half hours or two hours and ten minutes. There was going to be no other discussion but Khalil Mack. And then Aaron Rodgers took over. I don't know if we want to get into Gruden yet or what, but our friend Brad pointed out that he might be the first man to sign a

10-year contract and get fired before the first game. Is that possible? It's unbelievable what a player he is and what a disruptor he is. And he's like the first player to have an interception, a sack, a fumble return, an interception for a touchdown since he did it like four years ago. Amazing. It didn't even seem like he was on the field that much in the second half, which might have been part of the problem.

My wife, who knows nothing, was watching the game with Kyle and I when Cleo Mack had that run when he was just wreaking havoc. And we were talking about how they traded them. And again, she does nothing. She's like, they traded him. Why? And I was like, I was like, this is, that's a take. Basically you're now a professional sports expert. Cause that was all of our reactions. Well, I hate to tell you that you could have hedged, but, and you know but there was no way I would have let you do this, but you know what

the Packers were when Rodgers went out, what the odds were? Wasn't it? The Bears were minus 800, right? No, no, no. I think they had scored again, but when he first went out, it was 14-1. Well, I really wanted to tweet a Kaiser Soso joke. Cause that's one of my favorite Sal jokes ever. When you, when you dubbed Deshaun Kaiser, Kaiser Soso. And he came in and my wife who's still watching the game of this is like,

well, he looks like he'll be good. And we're like, no, no, no, no, no. He's not good. And then he just started sailing balls everywhere. And wait, Bill, why did he just hand the ball to Khalil Mack? He just handed it to And then he just started sailing balls everywhere. And wait, Bill, why did he just hand the ball to Khalil Mack? He just handed it to him. He just gave it to him.

That was weird. Um, I was getting flashbacks cause, um, literally 10 years ago, this weekend was when Tom Brady and my Patriots season went down in eight minutes against the chiefs. Oh,

wait. Oh, wow. And Roger's going down. Same thing. Look, there there's Rodgers going down, same thing. Look, there's cruel things that can happen to sports fans. We've had a ton of terrible things happen to our teams over the years. Ranking way, way, way, way, way, way up there

is losing your franchise quarterback in the first half of the first game. Sure, yeah. You're just, you're ready, you're ready. Football, here we come, here we go. This is going to be great. I can't wait. Hey, there's aaron rogers and then he's in a cart and and it just when i saw him on the cart i just assumed it was either i best case scenario torn mcl which is maybe what he has but uh then he comes back i tweeted the the joke about pier in the wheelchair. Cause it was similar to that. And the pair stakes arguably would hire cause that was the finals,

but they were talking Willis Reed, Collinsworth and Michaels. Yeah. So it was all pulled out there. It was pretty great. Unbelievable. They have to get better defensively though. The Packers,

I'm not sure they're ready to compete with the, you know, like we say, the NFC, we think the six seed will have to win 10, maybe 11 games. And I don't know if that defense, especially up the middle, is ready. And then dumb plays like

52. Yeah, I mean, coming up the middle, the late hit on the quarterback was really bad. Yeah, right. Yeah. I didn't feel like the Bears ran the ball enough, which is weird because they ran it 27 times.

27 times for 139 yards. That felt like, especially when they had the lead, that should have been 40 plus. But then they got too conservative. And it was like they were running when I didn't want to run. They weren't doing play action when I wanted them to do it. And as Kevin Clark texted me after the game, the ringers, Kevin Clark, Matt Nagy proven to be a true Andy Reid disciple.

I mean, that's a great show. Kudos to Kevin Clark. Nice, Kevin Clark. Yeah, I was texting you at the beginning of that game. I was like, I love this Matt Nagy. I love him. He's going to be coach of the year. This is great.

I love what he's doing. He's got the visor. He's bald. He's pulling out all the stops. And then by the end, I was like, what are his first coach to be coach of the year. This is great. I love what he's doing. He's got the visor. He's bald. He's pulling out all the stops. And then by the end, I was like, what are his first coach to be fired on? Let me look this up. They're lower than Anthony Lins. Yeah.

I felt like watching it, it reminded me of the Jags in January in New England, where they came out with all these awesome plays and just seemed like they had it. They really had their rhythm, and every look was different and it was meticulously planned out. And then the Jags kind of ran out of plays and then it just came down to, Oh shit. Oh, how do we protect the lead?

Oh, well, we don't want Bortles to do too much. Ah, all right. Run, run, pass,

punt, run, run, pass, punt. And it felt like the same thing happened to the Bears today. You were texting me in the first half, like how the plays the Bears were doing, it was incredible.

And then they just ran out. What happened to Trey Burton? Someone bid like $15 on him in our league. What happened to guys like that? All of a sudden, you guys disappeared from the offense. Yeah, you're right. There was no game plan going forward. Well, I don't know what to make of the,

I can't say the Packers knocked my socks off and I really do feel like the bears left on, on the table. We might, we might remember this. If the bears end up being good. And I think there's a chance they might be. If Trubisky can just give them like a B minus, he was weirdly more dangerous when he was rolling around and doing stuff versus just dropping back and being a passer. But maybe this will be a game that sets them up like, all right, we know we belong now.

Here we go. And they can look back and it'll be the learning experience game. Or they're going to go four and 12. What would you pick out of those two options? I think they're going to go eight and seven, nine and six or something, and then we're going to go into the last week and like, oh my god, they could have that Packers game that would have been the thick

of the playoff run. They blew that one. They have another night game this week against Seattle coming up week two, so it'll be interesting to see them again. The best thing I can say about Aaron Rodgers, other than all the great things Jason Taylor said earlier about finally being a believer.

First of all, just seeing him on one leg, I still felt like they had a chance and he was potentially going to make it happen. There's very few guys that you just think, all right, I know he's got one leg. I just can't count him out. Even if they blitz the hell out of him, I still feel like he might make something happen.

The second thing was when the Bears kicked the field, when it looked like the Bears were going to kick a field goal probably to go up 23-17 with like two minutes left. I specifically remember thinking to myself, this is setting up the Rodgers Hail Mary

and not even like in a joking way. Like, oh fuck, he's going to is setting up the Rogers Hail Mary and not even like be in a joking way. Like, Oh fuck, he's going to win this game out of Hail Mary. Like it really felt conceivable and credit to that dude, man. He's one of the best. I do want to remind everyone, uh, Tom Brady has five rings. Oh wow. Just settle down with the goat stuff. How about this? Win 40% as many rings as Tom Brady. And then we can have the goat conversation. Just this? Win 40% as many rings as Tom Brady, and then we can have the goat

conversation. Can you win 40% as many? All right. I want to have that conversation. The Bears, I think they were beat as soon as he came back on the field, though. All right. That pass to Geronimo Allison was great. There's no way Kaiser So-So is going to do that. But what happened

on that Cobb play? How did he get an ADR touchdown out of that? Where's the free safety or anyone there? Somehow, Khalil Mack almost chased him down. Khalil Mack was rushing Aaron Rodgers in the play and somehow

rallied back. The losers from that game, I think that me, I lost money. I literally lost. Trubisky, me, I lost money. I literally lost. Trubisky, the, oh man, all he has to do is manage the game and the Bears can go 11 and 5, 10 and 6, which I was in that camp. I felt like they had enough overall talent that he just had to be decent.

That took a hit. And then the big loser of the day, the Buccaneers, they pull off this crazy win in New Orleans. They blow up everybody's eliminator pool. They blow up every three-team parlay, tees, money line parlay, anything anyone had, they basically destroyed probably an hour and a half into the season. And it kind of should have been their Monday morning. And now they're just gone.

It's like it never happened. Yeah, well, they should have played that game Sunday night. That's their fault. Yeah, that was bizarro. And I think I texted you. I was like, everybody's on the Saints. Everybody's on the, you know, the Vikings Patriots ended up being easy. If you could just would have stayed with those on a teaser or whatever.

They covered, they barely covered. But yeah, everybody went down on the ship with the saints. I don't understand what, I guess you, I guess you're allowed to have one bad game defensively, but those guys are all, all pros. They're all, they had the best draft ever defensively. Uh, the saints did. And, uh, those guys, they didn't show up at all. I mean, what did he have? 500 yards, four touchdowns. Or was it, was I off on that? I think he had 500 yards.

The crazy thing was when they let him scramble for the game deciding first down. It was like third and 12. Obviously, he's going to take off if there's any daylight. Somehow, it was like wide open for him. Their defense was awful. They had some bad luck. I'm not going to overreact from a Saints perspective.

It just was kind of, we see this six, seven times a year. It was just one of those games. You could feel it early. Dumb plays, dumb touchdowns, dumb turnovers. And it just kind of got away from them. I also feel like these, the division, you know, these big favorites playing the division team that they played twice a year does seem like that has more chance for kind of

weirdness versus like a buffalo situation um yeah well i mean obviously if it's jamison there it's it's a different story they don't get the double digit um the uh nod but i don't know i just uh this is this is breeze garbage time this is when he's at his best he brought them back but it wasn't enough and if the panthers had somehow lost to the Cowboys, Tampa Bay would have been in first place alone in that division. Strange going on. Michael Thomas had some, he finished with good stats, but had a couple killer drops.

Not as many drops as all of the Chargers receivers in that Chiefs game. But I'm not willing to get carried away from a Saints perspective. But from a Bucs perspective, I think we went into week one thinking, you know, we did a couple podcasts together and we were thinking the mortal lock bad teams in the NFC were going to be Arizona and Tampa.

Arizona is awful. I think they, what do they have, like seven first downs in that game? So we're right about them. We were right about Buffalo. Are we ready to cross those two off? Because I was going to ask you. Arizona-Buffalo. Is it too early? I'm not ready to cross

Arizona off yet because we haven't seen the Rams play. And for all we know, there's not a single good team in that division. Who knows? I am actually ready to cross Buffalo off after week one. I think that is our first if we cross off one a week for the next 17 weeks

or next 16 weeks we will be at 16 playoff teams okay that's fine I think we crossed them off three times last year but I'm willing to take the plunge this early with them they showed me absolutely nothing it's a rare combination of really porous skill position guys and then a dreadful quarterback situation. The coach, you can tell

from the coach that it's not going to get better. Sometimes you watch these guys, sometimes you have the Hugh Jackson types who, even though it's going terribly, seem like they're still confident irrationally that it might turn around. Sean McDermott looked like it just was going to be a long season. It was pretty rough. Every time they cut to him, it looked like he should be sneaking drinks

from a flask or something. I mean, they had third and 24s. The guy would run 26 yards, turn around. He'd be wide open. Like, there would be nobody. The passing lanes were incredible. And if the Bills don't have those like ball hawking

safeties like they did last year and the year before it's going to be a long long year either way it's going to be a long year not a lot of offense

out of this team either we talked about the AFC South about you had that bet about could what was it eight and a half wins

for a division champ the over if every division champ goes over eight and a half wins, I win. So we were thinking, all right, who could screw up that bet? If we do that bet, who could be an eight and eight champ or an eight, seven, and one champ, whatever. And we joked about the ties. And the two divisions we targeted were the AFC South

and I think the AFC North we mentioned too and then they ended up having a tie in there. Yeah, and we did, but I'll say this. Early, even before that, when the Eagles were struggling to break double digits heading into the fourth quarter against the Falcons, I'm like, oh my God, it's going to be my division.

Eagles will be 8-8 and that'll be enough to win. They didn't impress me either. The Redskins looked okay. I think the Alex Smith thing is a real thing, but I bring it up because it really does seem like the AFC South is going to be bad. Because Houston did not look good. They cannot block.

They had a couple injuries during the game. Watson just didn't look comfortable. I was not scared of him the entire game. I didn't think their defense was that good. I think their coach is on the lower end of the spectrum and he really botched that game. And we've seen him do that before. The Colts defensively just don't have it. Luck was, it was nice to see Luck come back,

but wasn't impressed by them. And then, you know, the surprise one for me was Tennessee, who I thought had a chance to steal that division. Mariota gets hurt. I don't know when them. And then, you know, the surprise one for me was Tennessee, who I thought had a chance to steal that division. Mariota gets hurt. I don't know when he's coming back, but then Delaney Walker clearly got hurt, hurt. Like he's, I think he's done for the year. And Taylor Lue and their tackle has a concussion.

Like, yeah, that's trouble. There's not even a line on that game. We don't even know what it's going to be. But yeah, I've been screaming about the Colts secondary all summer. And Houston, you know, Brady was, he got off to a flat start. He was throwing his receivers' feet and everything. These guys were

open. He wasn't even hitting them. Let's not forget, this is the full Texans team. They go down like flies. They'll get injured every two weeks. They'll be someone big on defense that gets hurt. The fact that they couldn't capitalize even the beginning of that game says a lot about the Texans and where they might be going.

I wasn't worried about Brady. I was more worried about the separation from the pass receivers. Gronk was really the only one who was getting open at all downfield. And they had to use... Some of those plays he wasn't even open when he caught and made those catches.

It was amazing. They had to use... You know, we always talk on here about how they save Gronk for the playoffs, basically. They don't run the pass patterns that will get him hurt. And they had to use two of them

during this game to kind of pull it out. But Chris Hogan got shut down. The big shocker was how good Philip Dorsett looked because he is not somebody we were counting on, but it actually looked like

with a full training camp and the whole thing that he could at least do a relatively half decent impersonation of like a faster Dion branch type thing. It was, it was a Pat's game where you knew in the second quarter they had it. And we've watched that game a million times. I Miami,

I'm not sure what to make of them because that Tennessee game was so weird. The weather delay was like four hours. Yeah. And they had a couple of long plays. They had a kick return and I don't know what to make of that from there. But hold on, let's take a break. You know, the same time is money. It's true, especially when you're on your own business, but running a successful business involves taxes, contracts, and a whole lot of fine print things that eat up too much of your time. Well, it's time

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but a couple more things on week one. First of all, it was great to have football back. I didn't move for six hours. It was really enjoyable. The Chiefs, we backed the Chiefs. It was really enjoyable. The Chiefs. We backed the Chiefs. We were fired up for the Chiefs. We bet on them to win the division.

You picked them as the one seed in the AFC. I picked them as one of my Super Bowl teams along with the Los Angeles Rams. Mahomes comes out. I hate to use the word electric, but it was kind of electric. Mahomes was like genuinely exciting through some, I don't know, maybe had five or six throws that were just like kind of wow throws. I was really, really impressed.

And combined with Tyreek Hale and, you know, some of the weapons they have, that really jumped out to me. Did you watch that game? Yeah, I did. And he is a freak. He's an absolute freak because like before the half, he's trying to throw like downfield to get, you know, get in position for a field goal, but he's not even, he's given about a 30% effort and they're going like 35, 40 yards. Then he like launches into one and he could throw a great

deep ball and he has the best player in the league for that. Tyree kill has 13 touchdowns of 50 or more yards in 32 games. That's, that's astounding. Like I know, obviously a lot of those are returns and everything, but imagine this guy, this Ivan Drago having this weapon, it might be too much, too much for the AFC. I got to say he reminded me of Favre. I don't think their playing styles are exactly the same, but his ability to just uncork these lasers just from all over the place.

And man, he has to have the best arm in the league. I can't imagine anybody who can compete with that. There's some good arms, like Stafford always gets credit for having a good arm and a couple others, but there's nothing like that guy. That game was really exciting. And in reality, we were cheated because the chargers should have had about 20 more points. Their receivers drop multiple touchdowns and big plays.

And I think the takeaway for me with the chiefs, just being worried about them and, and our financial interest in them. And also what their ceiling is, the shoddy defense that they allegedly had, that reputation did not go away in that game. They made a couple of plays, but for the most part,

it seems like a team that is going to be in a lot of 37 to 30 type of games. It's like an old school AFC West team. I thought that game was genuinely exciting. And from the Chargers side, same stuff we've seen all last year, just a ton of talent, mistakes, special teams mistakes, coaching mistakes. They went for two in the first half. There was like four minutes left in the game, stupid defensive plays, all kinds of stuff. It was typical.

It was a typical Chargers game and reminiscent of the Falcons on Thursday night where it was like, wow, you're just not different at all than you were nine months ago. Nothing's going to change. Not at all. And the Chargers,

down to the bad field goal kicking. And this guy Sturgis is okay. I don't know why. He kicks that field goal. The charges could get the ball back down seven with the, with 50 seconds left, but he missed it and it was over. But if you're the chiefs,

really all you have to do is yeah. You have to, you have to out sling the other team to a point where Andy Reed can't screw you with under two minutes left. And that's kind of almost what happened. And no, let's not forget the homes hit Kelsey. I think he had one reception for six yards.

He's not even working that monster into the mix. Maybe his routes aren't deep enough for Mahomes. He's like, I can't even see you because I'm looking 40 yards downfield. I'm sorry. But yeah, they're going to be fun to watch. Kelsey's like, can you take some off the throws, man? You're hurting my hands. Yeah, I think the Chiefs, if you're just looking at who looked the best today

out of all the AFC teams, you would say the Chiefs. I think the Pats looked like the Pats. Their defense is definitely better. There's no question. I actually, I have them in fantasy, in our fantasy league that we should talk about in a little bit. But I think they're going to be reliable at home.

I think they're going to, you know home. I think they're going to, you know, that the front seven is much better. Secondary is pretty good. And it looks like it's much improved there. No more Matt Patricia, which is a bonus, but yeah, if you go through all the AFC teams,

those are the only two that really have looked good. Well, the Ravens, I mean, you can't count. I'm not counting them. I can't count that. Yeah,

but there were no flaws there. I just can't. If anything,ills. I'm not counting them. I can't count that. Yeah, but there were no flaws there. I just can't. If anything, if you're a Ravens fan, Mally Rubin was in our Slack losing her mind because they have this huge win, but it also kind of makes people believe in Flacco again. Right. And that's not the direction maybe you want them to go

if you're fired up for Lamar Jackson. So now that kind of emboldens the profile. Yeah. It's not fair to Lamar Jackson that the, the head open up against the bills, right? Right. Like,

oh, it gets to shine. Yeah. I mean, if Lamar Jackson had been in that game, they win 40 to three or whatever. And everyone's like Lamar Jackson, here he is.

Let's go. Uh, they, one of the best and easiest eliminator picks in my life. Yeah. I had them too. I went with them and, uh, and I really enjoyed it. And I, you were smart. And by the way, Yeah, I had them too. I went with them and I really

enjoyed it. You were smart. And by the way, kudos to you. I don't think you called the upset, but when you urged people to stay away from the Saints, she's like, I could see Fitzpatrick having one of those sneaky veteran games. All that. And I was like, yeah, yeah, yeah, whatever. Saints, whoever you go with, Ravens, you'll win.

But good job. Good job by you. I hope people listen. Good job by you, except I ended up betting on the Saints money line today. Oh, yeah, that's right. You let me do that. Bad job by both of us. Yeah, I put the Saints money line with the Rams. And I had the Bengals by themselves.

And then I had the Chiefs with the Rams money line. And then I had the Bears money line with the Rams money line. So basically the Raiders are going to win tomorrow because I've put the kibosh on them. I somehow went three and oh, I had Cincinnati. I had Washington and I had your Patriots and not a lot of money to show for it. So we're, we're back on track.

Well, we're not in the super contest this year. Oh yeah. Are you? Oh, you're in it. I'm out year. Oh yeah. Are you? I'm in it. Oh, you're in it. Yeah, I'm in it. I'm out. I'm retired. That was it, huh?

Yeah, I'm retired. They had, when I entered that contest in 2010, they had like 370 entries and now they have 3000, but they couldn't work out any way for me to be in it this year unless I flew there. So I don't know. What happened? You tried? Yeah, they won't do it. It is crazy.

It's crazy. It's fine. Look, I get the rules, but I don't know. I expected a little more. I expected a little more from their side to try to help me out to get in. Also, it's 2018. Why do we have to deal with this stuff? Yeah, I'm out.

We know who you are. People are making, you could trade on the internet $50,000 worth of stocks in three seconds, but they don't trust you to put your own picks in online. Stupid. It's fine. I'm going to start my own contest next year and they'll regret it. So let's talk about the fantasy draft.

Oh yeah. I thought I was getting voted out on Monday night. Yeah. You thought I was getting voted out. I could tell from your demeanor. You could tell. Well, as far as I knew you were getting voted out, but I didn't want to tell you that because then you don't show up. But I wouldn't have. Yeah, you wouldn't have. Right. I think he I think he pushed out the

Amish. He was talking a big game all summer. But to be fair, you were talking a big game about quitting all summer. So, yeah, I thought you guys were going to meet head on. But then what did he do? He went with whoever was the last one to walk in the room was who he was voting out. Well, he also did a very smart thing. Everybody had to sign a document that they wouldn't vote him out for the next five years. Yeah, it was on legal stationary.

Garagos is the lawyer. But I don't like that. I signed that. But if everybody does that, then our fun wrinkle of voting everybody out is gone, right? Well, you know what? I like playing fantasy with my friends, so I would never have voted Damoshek out. There you go.

That's nice. But the people who got voted out were Elliot and his friend who showed up wearing House of Carbs t-shirts, so I felt bad. I did feel bad. They were wearing rigor merch as they walked sadly out of there. They had a walk around Hollywood Boulevard with their head in the clouds with those shirts on. I love it. I haven't had Tom Brady in our draft.

I don't think since 07, when I won the draft with one of the greatest fantasy teams ever assembled. And ever since that year, Craig Powell, also a Pats fan has just locked down Brady every year to the point that it was kind of psychotic where you'd just be like 29 and Powell would be like 30. He's going to pay any price to have Brady. And he had him for 10 years. This year in our draft, it gets to eight bucks and nobody goes to nine. And I'm just sitting there. I'm like, all right, nine. I'm not

letting Brady go for eight. And then I got Brady for nine. So I have Tom Brady on my fantasy team. And he's on my real team. And it was, I got to say, it was really enjoyable. I understand what Powell was doing all these years. Well, good for you. But remember, you and Hange crying up until then about how the Patriots receivers suck.

And, you know, let's just remember, it doesn't really matter, right? It doesn't matter who he has out there. You could have Logan Paul out there and throwing passes to him or whatever YouTube influencer out there. It could be Des Bryant. Des Bryant was tweeting, basically pleading with the Pats to sign him.

And it was like, I don't think we need another receiver who can't get separation from the line. I'm sorry, Des. Right. But, but yeah,

so the fantasy draft, the star was Jon Hamm, who was just insulting everybody and then including his own team because he picked the worst team, not only the week, but of the entire season. And I don't think his team cracked 50 points yet, but he was in rare form.

You played against him, right, this week? No, unfortunately I didn't. I still, I beat somebody, but. was in rare form. And then you played against him, right? This week. No, I, unfortunately I didn't. I still, I beat somebody, but, um, Oh, I thought you did. Yo, no, I did. I beat him. No, I beat him this week. Yeah. You beat him.

Yeah. Yeah. Have some of that ham. He was, he was great because he was, he was throwing darts at everybody. And also somehow thought he knew exactly how much, uh, everybody had to bid. So there were a couple of illegal bids by people. Like if you had $18 left and you bid 19 or whatever, if you had 19 and you had like six slots left,

the most you could bet is bid is 14. Right. And then someone would bid 15 or 14. He would go nuts and caught two people on that. But then the next 10 people he accused actually did have enough money. There was a lot of accusing. And then the other thing he was doing was he was doing the one, two,

and then right as August was saying sold, he was just saying the price and there was confusion. He made it all up to us though, when he did an actual fake Mercedes ad. He did. He did. He did the lease deal, the voice and everything.

That was nice. Somebody tried to insult him back like saying like, go hawk another Mercedes or something like that. And he immediately lapsed into a 30 second Mercedes commercial. So that was a highlight.

The other highlight was our friend Brad, who has been on your podcast with me, still the highest rated against all odds ever. Brad's life story. Brad, you were telling me Brad is in especially rare form lately

and I didn't really believe it. And we were in a room, we were in the Jimmy Kimmel Live Green Room doing the draft because our happy endings bar fell through. And Brad, for some reason, didn't like Mike August's, was doing the auctioneer stuff and went in the other room and closed the door. So he wasn't part of the draft and couldn't hear

anything. And we just opened the door and yelling out auction bids, but I had missed 80 picks and was pacing around and yelling at people and insulting people. And it was really special. I felt like watching it. I felt a lot like I did with Aaron Rodgers tonight, where I was like, I'm going to remember this. This is the night I'm going to remember the rest of my life. That's how I felt with Brad. I know you felt the same.

You did a nice job illustrating it, though. Yeah, I think you had an Instagram story. You showed him spinning around and going from room to room. But the special thing about this year is Mike August is a friend of ours, but really, really corny. Oh, hell. Had a microphone. So he's extra loud. And he's like, all right, Le'Veon Bell, $45. Le'Veon Bell Peppers. Bell Peppers here. Le'Veon Bell Telephone. And Brad's like, oh, I can't take it. I'm out of here. He hasn't said anything funny or clever in 20 years. And then you wouldn't see Brad for like 15 minutes,

over which we probably did 10 names that he might have wanted a bid on. And then he'd come back and he'd make a bid. And I think he missed like 140 out of 180 names called. Yeah, but then at one point he wandered in when he was up and he was like, James Conner, $1. And we all laughed. And that turned out to be probably the best pick of the draft. Well, it sure was.

He played against me today and James Conner at 30 points. Maybe we should talk about the overreactions of the week. One of them is that the Steelers could do just as well with James Conner as they could Le'Veon Bell. Yeah, that's definitely not true. One other thing about Brad, you know when Chris Berman did the home run derby and Twitter just went crazy, they just lost their minds how annoying he was. August was like Chris Berman in the home run derby and Brad was all of Twitter.

Just reacted to him. Yeah, we didn't talk about Brown Steelers. We haven't talked about it yet. Oh, that's right. Yeah. What's to talk about? I mean, it would have been the game of the day if Aaron Rodgers hadn't done this crazy comeback on one leg. They turned the ball over six times.

They missed a field goal to win an OT. And somehow didn't lose on the road. Hugh Jackson gets six turnovers at home and was down 21-7 at one point. And as they're driving, and it seems like they're driving for the winning touchdown or field goal or whatever at the end of regulation, Hugh Jackson calls for, maybe it was Todd Haley, the coaching staff, calls for the home run. We're going to get Josh Gordon deep. He's going to run it in.

We're going to get the touchdown, which is great. Except Tyrod Taylor is their quarterback and he underthrew it by 15 yards and it got intercepted. It was a coaching apocalypse. It was awful. Pittsburgh was awful.

Everybody was disgraced. The fans were getting rained on for four hours. They're celebrating like something good's going to happen. It ends up being a tie. Should they have, how many people made the poor half a Gatorade bottle on Hugh Jackson joke or half a Gatorade bottle? Well, a lot. Yeah. Including me.

You stole my tweet. In fact, I had it as a poll and then you stole it. Oh, I didn't even know. What was your poll? Well, you know, it's just a bad look for the ringer. If you're stealing your other employees jokes, but whatever. I would never steal from you. So no,

but how do you feel that you're supposed to, I guess they should feel good about it. The Browns, right? Anytime. It's not a loss brother. Bri from my podcast against a lot. It says nothing would be better if they went zero,

zero and 16. Oh, that's it. It's still in play. Yeah, they could do it. Well, then we, the team would do it. We have our wins pool and this has been's still in play. Yeah, they could do it. They'd be the team to do it. We have our wins pool, and this

has been a fight in the wins pool, which is no longer a fight because it's just the rule. It's a wins pool. You have to win to get a win. But we started the ringer. Right, right. A lot of people tweet me about that. How do you handle ties? It's a wins pool. You need to win to advance. It's a win. If the Steelers have eight wins this year, they have eight wins.

It's not like eight and a half. But the ringer had never done a wins pool. So on our Slack, they were like, what do you mean? That should be a half a win. So I had to have the same kind of battle that we had for all those years. Who had the Steelers at the ringer?

Do you remember? I can't remember, but they were upset about it. But you know what? Oh, I think it was probably Roger Sherman. But you know why they call it a wins pool? Because we count up the wins at the end of the year. Yeah, that's right. A tie is not a win, unfortunately.

So everybody wins. Yeah, do a ties pool on the side, if that's how you want to do it. Yeah, ties pool for Roger's winning. The best stat I saw all day on NFL Network, and someone sent this to me, said Browns, 0-0-1. Best start since 2004. No. Yes.

That's unbelievable. How could that be? Best start since 2004? They've lost 14 home openers or 13 home openers or 13 openers. It's crazy. I was watching the beginning of that game and they ran a stat that the Steelers were 29-4 against the Browns. It was like 29-4 in their last 33 or something. Yeah.

They did like for them to tie the Browns is one of the worst losses in franchise history. But man, I think everybody was disgraced on both sides. Pittsburgh, they did this last year. We wrote them off after four games and then they at least rallied back enough that we thought they were a threat.

So I don't want to write them off, but that was not a good start. And Roethlisberger looked particularly shaky. And at some point, it's just not going to come back in October. He's going to have a year where it just, that's it. But I did enjoy how much the O-line was celebrating the James Conner touchdown.

So there was some real fun in that. They were really going nuts. Baker Mayfield, if he's not the starter within four weeks, I think we should be concerned. I think people forgot how mediocre Tyrod Taylor was, especially after hard knocks. There's a

reason he's 30 years old and is kind of bouncing around and super available. But what'd you think of the Seattle-Denver, the Case Keenum and the whole Denver thing. Cause they, I thought they showed flashes. Yeah. I like, I like Denver. I like them going into the game. I guess they just pushed if you bet it right.

A full minus three, but they split carries Freeman, Royce Freeman. I have them in the league and this guy, Lindsay, we're both 15 for 71. So they have a nice, it seems running back by committee. Yeah, I don't mind them. And their defense is always going to be tough. So they'll be in the mix, I think. It felt like that game would have been a blowout if it wasn't for the Seahawks punter,

who is clearly going to be an MVP candidate this season. I'm not even joking. He dominated that game. It was over and over again. He was just pinning them inside the 20 or the 15 and was kind of keeping the Seahawks in it. I don't know really what kind of team the Seahawks have. Doug Baldwin's hurt already,

and that wasn't a great loss for them. That's a game, if they're going to go 9-7, 10-6, you probably got to win that game. Brandon Marshall stepping up is good for them. I would say in Doug Baldwin's place, but yeah, the new Legion of boom is the boom off that guy's foot, the ponder,

because that's what you look forward to now watching. What'd you think of Jimmy gorgeous today? It was about what I thought would happen. And he's going to throw that pick. That's going to hurt them. And he's still a little green in that area. That was his first loss, right, as a starter? Yeah, I think it was.

Not having Goodwin basically the whole game was kind of a murder for him. Their skill position, guys. I will say, George Kittle. You like him. I'm sure he's taken in all your fantasy leagues, but they went to him a lot. He really seemed like he was the dominant receiver on that team.

And there was a couple plays when he was open and Jimmy missed him. I think Kittle dropped on him, but he was kind of all over the place in that game. Well, speaking of fantasy,

the big fantasy pickup is going to be W. Disley, the tight end for Seattle. Oh, yeah. Went for five for 105 and a touchdown this week. And then last thing before we get to the

lines, the Bengals did what they had to do in that game. They fell behind. They were down, I think, 10. And luck looked pretty good. And it had all the makings of like, oh man, why didn't we see this? This is why the line was so suspicious. It had...

I was F-cursing Andy Dalton early. I was really mad because I had them all over the place. But, you know, A.J. Green is somehow one of the most underrated receivers. I don't know. He was one of the fantasy guys. I was like, I don't care what he goes for. I'm not taking A.J. Green. He just steps up. He makes

big plays. And that Ross, he was like the fastest guy in the league last year at the Combines. They could have a nice thing going. If Dalton can get in sync with these guys. Joe Mixon looked really good in that game too. It was a great day for NFL players who were involved in horrific domestic violence incidents because him and Tyreek were big winners today. And it still never feels right being like, Oh man, Joe Mixon looks great.

Cause you know, you have the flashbacks to the incident. But I think Cincy's where they want to be. Because Pittsburgh certainly didn't show that much. And we don't know about Baltimore until they play a real football team. Well, they're playing each other this week. So that'll be interesting. We might be all right with that. All right, we're going to take a break.

Then we're going to do the Week 2 Lines. This part of Guess the Lines is brought to you by Miller Lite. Here in the ringer, we have our disagreements. There shouldn't be any debate about this. Miller Lite, the great tasting light beer, only 96 calories, 3.2 grams of carbs. That's fewer calories than half the carbs of Bud Light. So there's really nothing more to talk about. The argument's over. Kind of like how Tom Brady has five rings and Aaron Rodgers has one. That argument's over too. If you have a real argument, let me hear it.

Until then, stick with Miller Lite, the official beer of Bill Simmons in college from 1988 to 1992. Miller Lite, hold true. And since we're here, go check out theringer.com slash shop. You get t-shirts, you get stuff to stick on your laptops, little stickers, sweatshirts, hats, dad hats, more stuff coming. Check it out if you like The Ringer, and I hope you do, and you want to support us. And for us, it's about being out there, having you wearing our stuff out there and

spreading the word for us. Our site's free. The podcasts are free. You could buy a hat. Go check it out. TheRinger.com slash shop. We two lines, speaking of the Bengals, Thursday night, Bengals home for the aforementioned Ravens. Tough one for the Ravens. They barely get to celebrate the ass kicking of Nathan Peterman and Buffalo. Now all of a sudden, they're on Thursday night. Where is this Thursday night game?

Is this NFL? No, it's in Cincinnati. And this is interesting because they played twice last year. The first time the Ravens, it was week one. They went in there and they beat the crap out of them.

They shut them out. I think the Bengals were shut out twice at home to start the season. Everyone's calling for Marvin Lewis's head. But the last game of the season, you remember, was New Year's Eve, and the Bengals knocked the Ravens out of the playoffs. So I don't know who owes who here. Is this NFL Network, though, or is it Fox?

It's not Fox yet. I don't think Fox starts. It hasn't started yet? Yeah. I'm not positive. I picked Bengals by three. I think this is. I have a... I pick Bengals by three. I think this is a classic minus three. I said Bengals by one and a half.

Ravens still get the nod by a point and a half. That's a mistake. I think so as well. I think they are even... They're even or the Bengals are even better. And I actually think the Bengals are a little bit better. And that's dumb. I do not agree with that.

Well, I wonder what would this line be before week one? I mean, they're just giving the Ravens a lot of credit for beating up on the Bills. I think it's more they don't believe in Cincinnati at all. That was why we saw that Colts line, Colts by two. The Colts, to me, looked like a bottom six team. I think Luck looks good, but their running backs are horrific and they really only have one receiver. Sunday, rarely do this. We rarely do a double marquee game, but I really do think we have two marquee

games this week for whatever reason, week two. First one, Patriots on the road in Jacksonville a rematch Bortles vs. Brady AFC title game from nine months ago I picked the Patriots by three and a half I had a lot of trouble with this one

wow I'm surprised I thought you would short sell this and your Patriots and they're on the road and everything I said two and a half and it's two

ooh but that'll go up trying to remember all the times the Patriots were less than minus three on the road against anybody the last 10 years. So they cannot be more than seven times. If you just go by points,

I don't want to overvalue this week, but again, the Jaguars just don't seem to have as much firepower that they need to, you know, beat the Patriots. just don't seem to have as much firepower that they need to beat the Patriots. Patriots not going to score 13 points this game, right? That Giants game was too winnable for the Giants, I felt like. I didn't think Eli, I mean, we're now going on four years of saying this,

but Eli did not look good. And it did feel like the Giants could have and should have stolen that game and could not get done. The Jags kind of squeaked it out. Wasn't a command performance by any means. This will go up to three. I think you're right. It'll go up to three.

All right, no teaser game so far. I don't know what we're going to do. Well, the other one, Green Bay at home against Minnesota. And I made my guess before Aaron Rodgers got hurt. You could change it. Resurrected. No, I still feel pretty good about this. I have Packers by three. I had two and a half, and it's only one and a half.

So, Vegas not as impressed as we were with Aaron Rodgers. Do you like that, Sal? Do I like that? No? Do I like that? No, do you like that? Do I like it? Oh, yeah, I like it a lot.

Did you see? I think it in all over it. I don't know if you saw this. Kirk Cousin trademarked, you like that. Oh, he did? Yeah. I missed that. He really did.

I thought it was a joke. I thought it was an internet hoax. And it's not. He trademarked, or he's trying to trademark, you viked that. Oh, no. Yeah. No one's competing for this, are they? It could happen for himself.

You viked that. If there's some Rich Packers fan, they might have to try to beat him to it. You viked that is almost single-handedly going to derail their season, not to mention the, the 60 years of bad mojo. Oh my God. I may need to shower before going on to the next game. I don't like you.

Like that. The bikes look, the bikes look good on D you know, no surprise. Cause they're loaded with talent, but they, they're so deep. I,

I thought Garoppolo weirdly played well considering he was under siege and didn't really have anybody to throw to. I thought he handled himself. For the fact that they were kind of lingering in that game for most of the game, I thought it was pretty impressive. The Vikes are good. I guess so. That's a hostile environment and one of the best defenses

and top three team. I would say, yeah, I guess we give Jimmy G more credit than I should have there. Well, my point is I don't think he's bad. I think that was a really tough spot, and I don't know if a lot of QBs would have done better with the skill guys that he had, which were basically Alfred Morris and George Kittle,

and it just was not a murderer's row. Breda, yeah. Yeah, Matt Breda. Random receivers that you kind of were like, oh, I think I know who that guy is. So, yeah, Packers. Those are two nice ones, Sal. I have to say, I think there's a third one in there,

but we'll get it. But, yeah, a miracle win aside, he can't be excited about this game, Aaron Rodgers. He just can't be. I know it's home and everything, but that's another tough defense. He's going to get banged around a lot here. Yeah, and they did a nice job in the NBC game today

pointing out how much faster he was getting the ball out in the second half compared to the first half. So I assume they're going to do that again, but this time the Vikings are going to be ready for him to do that, and that'll be a problem. Do you like Chief Steelers as an elite game? Not after sitting through a Steelers game, no. I know, but they'll be home.

It's a fun game. What odds do you give that Bell's on the team next week? Oh, I think he sits out a couple more. Really? Yeah, I think this is bad now. He doesn't really have to come back until week nine or week 10. But what's interesting is he can't really accomplish anything. There's no way for them to give him a new contract.

They could trade him. And that's really it. So unless he's trying to demand a trade, I don't really know what he's trying to prove at this point, other than what a lot of people have theorized, which is he just doesn't want to put 16 games of mileage on his body. What do you think he was trying to prove with that tweet, with the monocle emoji? Because I stared at that for a long time. I can't remember who did this, but it was funny. Somebody responded that that was the face he was making when he realized he lost $850,000 by not playing.

I think it was Joel Solomon. Shout out to Joel Solomon. I love Joel Solomon. Yes, I think that was his. But maybe that's what it was. I don't know. But really, what was he thinking? It was like, is this like, hey, I could see better than you can or or I could see this coming or kind of thing. I just, I would love to know what that was about.

Just seems like it's not a great idea to continue your feud with the five, 300 pound guys who block for you. Yeah. The guys who save your, your head and knees. Yeah, probably not. Also when one of them is going to come back in six weeks and instead of making 10 times as much as them, you're going to make 30 times as much as them. So you've got to take that into account too. Yeah, true. One of the five guys is a pouncey and they're like the Morris brothers in

basketball. It's just never a good idea to be on the opposite side of the pounces ever. Hey, the poop FECTA goes three deep this week. Um, there's only one really magnificent poop-fected game. The other two are poop-fected games because one of the teams are involved. First one, Chargers at Buffalo.

I don't know what Buffalo does at quarterback. I don't think this is the game to bring Josh Allen in, but I don't know if we should ever see Nathan Peterman again. What would you do? What would your choice be between those two options? I go everything equal at this point. Because if a team's going to go 3-13 or 4-12, give the rookie the nod, right?

Let him get the reps, I would say. I would normally say that. I would say that if it was basketball, but a must-win game for the Chargers, like if Bosa comes back, I'm not sure that's what I want for my first Josh Allen game, but I just don't know how you can play Peterman again. We always say the word historically

is now the most overused word in sports analysis, and it's just thrown around all the time. But his two starts are historically the worst. I think, I don't know if we'll ever see it again. You can't do worse. I don't know why they didn't learn their lesson last year. It almost cost them a playoff spot, but maybe they think that's good luck to set them on a nice, nice run.

They must see something in the lake. I've bet against the Bills in this spot. Chargers at Bills. I remember two times probably in the last three like. I've bet against the Bills in this spot. Chargers at Bills. I remember two times probably in the last three years, and I've lost. But what do you have for a line? I'll tell you this. I will not be putting the Chargers in a parlay or tease. I will not be selecting them in an eliminator pool.

They don't look exactly right yet. They don't. The coach and just the juju that team has and the fact that I just don't like it. Plus, they had the dreaded hype machine for them three weeks before the season. Everybody, you didn't watch this team last year? You don't realize the same coach is coming back? What's going to be different? I have Chargers by nine.

Wow, after all that. Actually, you're going to be closer. I went low. I said five, and it's seven and a half. So you get that one. Oh, shit. and actually you're going to be closer. I went low. I said five and it's a seven and a half. So you get that one. Oh shit. Now I want to tease the charges. That's too low. Can we bet Anthony Lynn or Caleb Sturgis who goes first? How are the, how can they still not, I would have drafted a field goal kicker two rounds earlier than anyone's ever done it before, just to not ever have this problem again or gone and, you know, go get

like Adam Vinatieri or anybody who is some veteran reliable guy and just overpay for them in free agency. How do they do this to themselves again? Why? Now I'm wondering if it's just them, like, cause Sturgis isn't awful. You just, maybe just coming to the Chargers does this to you. Oh, it's like spinal trap Trap drummer type of situation? Bizarre.

Just bizarre. Jets are home. We haven't seen the Jets yet. We have no idea if this line is ridiculous or not. I feel stupid guessing it. They're playing the Dolphins. I have the Jets minus two over the Dolphins. I said the Dolphins minus two,

and it's Dolphins minus one and a half. But yeah, there's not a lot to go on here. The only thing I would say about the Dolphins minus two and it's Dolphins minus one and a half. But yeah, there's not a lot to go on here. The only thing I would say about the Dolphins, again, I don't want to overreact to that bizarre rain delay game, whatever the hell was going on there. But they did get rid of a lot of these guys that have never really won anything who were like cancer guys or just wrong for chemistry or just wasn't working. They moved on and they brought in all these new guys and it's like Danny Amendola and

people like that. And maybe there is a little kind of suboptimal Ewing theory potential with them. Cause there has to be a second half decent team in the AFCs. The AFC is bad. You're not going to have three terrible teams in one division. Somebody has to rise. We say that every year. Nobody has to, the second place could be six and 10. It can be,

it really can. It could be except for that, that rest of the AFC is so bad. I just, right. I think it would be hard for somebody not to go at least 79. So maybe, maybe it's the Dolphins.

Did anyone draft a Kenny Stills? Yeah, they must have, right? I don't know, but he's been on everyone's team. We've passed him around. Two touchdowns. He's available in Fab. If he hasn't been picked up yet, he will be picked up

and then probably waived in week seven. Yeah, that's true. That's true. Rams home playing the putrid Arizona Cardinals. And I am assuming the Rams are going to take care of business tomorrow against the Raiders. I was projecting that in my guess. I had the Rams by 13.

I said 14. I thought you couldn't make this high enough. And it's only 10 and a half. That seems low. You get that one, but why isn't that, why isn't that 14, 15, 16? What?

It doesn't seem like, you know, it doesn't seem like people believe in the Rams as like a kind of a juggernaut kicking everybody's ass team yet. But isn't that a perfect quarterback for them to go against? If it's Bradford, like check down guy, that's all he's going to do.

He had a classic one today. I mean, it's a cliche to even joke about at this point, but there was one there down 21, nothing. It's third and eight, second half. He does the thing. He shuffles his feet and just dumps it to the running back

in double coverage who gets tackled for a yard. And I just don't understand. Year after year, teams talk themselves into this guy as a starter. It's like, what are you doing? He is what he is. He's like 30 now. What are you, he's going to change? It's going to,

it's going to find some sort of quarterback Jesus and, and transform. Like this is who Sam Bradford is. It's not like, he's also going to get Larry Fitzgerald killed. Like Larry Fitzgerald's like, Hey, I like running real routes here.

What are you doing to me? I have to go four yards over the middle every time. Yeah. They might have to, they might have to put Larry in the, on the Gronk plan. Just have them run little out patterns and stuff like that. All right, barely watchables.

We have five barely watchables this week. First one, Tennessee at home again. Oh, no, they were in Miami this week. I'm sorry. At home for the first time. Hosting the not impressive at all Houston Texans. I don't know why I didn't put this in there. Should this have been a poop factor game?

Yeah, maybe. I'll tell you right now, there's no line on it because they don't know what Mariota's availability is, but I'm not excited about this game. Can we demote this to the poop factor? Yeah, sure. I think we could do that. All right, so it's a quadruple poop factor this year. I think, again, this is a Sal overreaction of week one,

but I think the Titans are a last place team. I think we're going to see a lot of this all year long. Yeah, we've cautioned each other not to overreact, but it does seem like there's one week, one game every year where just bad stuff happens and the team never recovers. And that game had a lot of bad juju. And Delaney Walker, you know, not only gets hurt, but the guys from the other team are running over to tap his helmet as he's getting carted off. It's a bad sign considering he was by far their best receiver.

Right. All right. Is there a way to not have week one in Tampa, Miami, Tennessee? We said this last week. What are the odds? There was lightning for three hours in Miami. I can't believe it. Early September.

Wow. Yeah. What a shocker. I feel like when we were younger and we'd drive to a game, they'd never call a game because of the lightning, right? Certainly not like, well, this storm is 40 minutes away, so we're going to wait. They certainly wouldn't do anything like that.

But, I mean, I guess it would be the NFL's luck that some cheerleader would get struck in the middle of a routine. But, yeah, it's just strange that Tennessee College was lightninged out two weeks in a. And then Tennessee pro team today. I wonder, how do you think a Dow would handle a Titans cheerleader getting electrocuted by lightning? I didn't think you'd handle the next week.

I'm not, she doesn't die. She's okay. She's, she's going to have a full recovery. What does good. They'll do. No,

everybody would play and he'd donate like 25 grand to, uh, some cheerleading fund. This would be a fun, this would be a fun game every week on the pod. We come up with a terrible scenario and try to guess how Roger Goodell would awkwardly handle it. So that's the one for this week. So you think $25,000 donation?

Yeah, but he would think he was being a hero in that regard. I think it's a press conference with this $25,000 donation and then 24 hours later there's an E60 story about how the Titans cheerleaders have been severely underpaid for the last six years and it all somehow backfires and the NFL looks bad in the end

and it becomes a whole scandal. That would be very Goodell-ish. Yeah, it seems perfect. Saints at home, we'll see whether this was a terrible moment for their season or just like a throwaway game in week one. The Bucs disaster. Home again, playing the Browns.

So the Saints had the Bucs in round one and the Browns, or week one and the Browns in week two had all the makings of 2-0. And now it's like a borderline must-win game to have to beat Tyrod Taylor, Baker Mayfield, whoever's going to play.

I have the Saints by 8.5. Wow, you got that. Again, I thought this was going to be way high. I said 10, and it's only 8. Please stop me from putting everything I have on the Saints this week. I do look at it as a must win. And then they are going to win.

It's just going to be a blowout, isn't it? Here's my only hesitation. And I say this fully knowing that Hugh Jackson is the coach and Tyrod Taylor is the QB. The Browns have good players. Like, Myles Garrett was one of the three best players I watched today. I thought he was a wrecking ball. So Miles Garrett, yeah, sure, he is.

He's great. But he screwed them in this game because on that interception return in overtime, that would have put them down to like the seven-yard line. Yeah, the blocker. Instead they had to move back because of the hole. That push in the back, that guy with the ball was taking his step out of bound. Like he was, not only was the guy who pushed in the back,

never going to catch him, but the guy stepped out of bounds. Like it was the highest paid guy on the field made the stupidest play. It was really weird to me, but now I do like watching him. Well, other than the stupidest play of the game, I thought he was really good.

I really enjoyed watching him. But yeah, I mean, like Jarvis Landry gets open and makes third down catches. And he's just kind of good. I liked Nick Chubb. I thought Nick Chubb looked really promising when they were bringing him in. And then on defense, they have guys.

I don't know. I just, they have more guys than usual is what I noticed as I watched them. Could this be the game? Because I thought they would be 0-1-2. All right, they could probably be 0-1-1 after this. Do you put Baker in then? Or can you even get in the mind of Hugh Jackson?

I'm the wrong person to ask. I would have put Baker in for the overtime because Tyrod was bad. I just felt like at some point you just got to cut the cord. I would start Baker this week. I think Baker's better. And if he's not better today, he'll be better in three weeks. This does make me think though, with the saints, who is the Owen two team?

So they would obviously have to lose again next week. That then spawns the whole, Oh, what's going on with these guys? What's wrong? Cause I think the Saints are in that mix for that Monday conversation a week from now. Saints are in it. Could be the Falcons. We haven't gotten to that yet.

Yeah. Chargers. Chargers for sure. And then I think that's it. Those are the three. Yeah. I mean, you wouldn't say that about the Seahawks, Giants, or Cowboys, probably.

No, unless the Rams lose tomorrow, which they won't. But that would be the only other one I would do. All right. Redskins at home playing the Colts. I will say I have a couple Redskins fans in my life, and the hair on their arms have raised. Yeah. They're very focused right now. They are looking at a wide open NFC East

and they had a dominant performance today against a terrible team but still they have a very competent quarterback who has a high winning percentage and they're starting to get ideas and they play the Colts who are not that impressive at all to say the least today. I have the Redskins by four.

You have four, I have three and a half. I have the Redskins by four. Uh, you have four. I have three and a half. Damn. It's five and a half. So you win that one. Okay. Yeah.

That's very, that's very high. And I will say joining us right now, Andrew, the giant luck, you will be traveling to the mid Hudson civic center facing Jonathan Allen, Ziggy Hood, and the Washington Redskins defense.

What are your thoughts? First of all, incredible to be back. Just great to be out there again with the guys. Obviously, the game didn't go our way, but it was just so nice to be out there doing my thing again. And we have high hopes we have high hopes for this season that's Andrew

the Giant look September 16th Mid-Hudson Civic Center there you go 49ers at home playing the Detroit Lions who we haven't seen yet I have the Niners by two and a half

I had no idea what to do with this game oh man you boxed me out again I said two and it's three and a half as of now ooh that's high

I didn't think the Niners looked good today I didn't think they it was hard to say how much of that was the Vikings but I certainly wouldn't say

oh man there's a foundation here for a playoff team that was not my reaction to that game if anything it was like it could have been a lot worse oh man, there's a foundation here for a playoff team. That was not my reaction to that game. If anything, it was like, it could have been a lot worse. Marquis Goodwin's out.

I just think if Sam Darnold throws two interceptions and the Lions win by 17, then this could be closer to a pick-em than anything, right? Well, here's another line that could swing dramatically. Broncos, Raiders, Broncos home. You and I both think the Raiders are going to be horrific. They're going to take a beating for the Khalil Mack trade all day tonight and all Monday as well. I only could get this up to Broncos minus five.

I think this gets to seven by game time. Oh, man. You're getting this because I only thought it would be three, not knowing tomorrow's result or Monday's result. It's four and a half right there in the Vegas zone for you. Yeah, that makes sense. And if the Raiders are bad, that just goes to seven. Let's take one more break.

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These are good. Well, you thought Steelers Chiefs should have been a marquee game. I get what you're saying. If Bell's in there, it's a marquee game. But I don't know. They're my top two seeds in the AFC, I think. Or no, I'm sorry, The Patriots in the top three, two of the top three.

I have the Steelers. I'm assuming Bell isn't playing. I have the Steelers only as two and a half point favorites against in the chiefs. I had four and a half and it's up to five right now. Ooh, I get that. I've been dead on this whole day. So if I'm three points off, that's a good sign to go the other way. You're right. We're big Chiefs fans.

Is that a tease the other way? We rarely do this. Do we take the plus 11? I think. I just like betting the points again. I like having that three and a half against the Chargers. They're up like 17 to 12. I was doing the math.

I'm like, oh, I'm already up two scores. I think the Chiefs are good. The one way the Steelers can get them is if they outscore them, not to sound like a moron, but like to go 30 points or more, basically, because I think the Chiefs are going to get their points. I can't remember if they played last year, and obviously it's a different situation, but the playoff game was a night game.

The Chiefs were home and lost, right? Yeah. They, they had, there's a, I just have a vague memory of a lot of weird games between these two specific teams. I don't know why,

but I think, uh, it's, this is going to have to be one of those Roethlisberger throws for three 20 and four TDs type of games. And I don't know if he has it in him yet. Falcons, Falcons home for the Panthers.

We haven't talked about the Falcons yet. No. We swore not to overreact to week one, and yet there were the Falcons just running it back and doing all the same dumb shit they did last year that blew the whole season. Yeah, it wasn't week one. It was week 22 last year.

It really was. Or 18 of last year. Yeah, it was like a continuation. I think all of us are just tired of them at this point. Matt Ryan looks terrible. Again, I don't want to stumble down to something. I don't know if you were kidding, but I wouldn't be surprised. Like we should go by the, that could be another weekly thing.

I wouldn't be surprised if so-and-so had some kind of shoulder injury. Like Matt Ryan's my guy for that right now. Oh, like he had a snowboarding accident. Yeah. Something, something's messed up. You brought it up. Oh, like he had a snowboarding accident. Yeah. Something, something's messed up. You, you brought it up.

I think you tweeted about it. I did. He looked hurt. He looked hurt before he threw the interception. Yeah. But their play calling is just dismal. It's just, you know,

Julio Jones gets them down the field and then they give them the cold shoulder inside the 10 yard lines. Ridiculous. It's weird that they don't do nearly as much play of action as you think they would do. Cause I think their running backs are scary and it just seems like that, that was kind of their game two years ago. And now it's a lot more predictable,

especially around the red zone. I have, they're playing the Panthers. They're in Atlanta. I NFC South. They play twice a year. Weird shit always happens. I couldn't go higher than four on this.

I have Falcons by four. Yeah, you got it. Just edging me out of there. I said three and a half, and it's five. So your team played the Panthers today. What did you think? Both of them looked flat. They really did.

And the Panthers didn't know, didn't need to, it was, it was actually typical Panthers too, right? Like that's the team that gets on the field. You're like, all right, Cam could put up 30 points. He's got some weapons there. And, uh, they couldn't really move the ball either. And like I said, the Cowboys didn't play with any urgency until the end. Um, but Keekly is such a difference. Like I feel like he's on the field half the time, not just because defense is on the field half the time. When he's on, you could see, like, this shit doesn't happen in the middle offensively.

You can't get anything going. But he gets hurt, like, four times a game. It really, they live and die with that guy defensively. Yeah, what happened? Did he get concussed? What happened that one time when it seemed like he was really hurt? I don't know. Yeah, he was grabbing his head. So it could be another con hurt? I don't know. Yeah, he was grabbing his head.

So it could be another concussion. I don't know how many more he has in him. One more should be it. Yeah, I'm going to say one more and then he should retire or they're doing a disservice to all that stuff. Yeah, they had that happen and then somebody else got hurt for them. It was one of those games where you got the two point. Yeah.

You got the two point. It was 16, eight. And I didn't even, I ended up not betting on the Panthers. I think if I had done super contest, they would have been one of my picks. And it had all the makings of the,

the Cowboys with a minute left score the touchdown to cut it to 16, 14, but then miss the two point. Cause you have Jason Garrett as your coach, but you cover. And I just, I was already mentally down that road and somehow the Panthers won and covered in 16-8 final. I was mad at this garbage time cover

that hadn't happened yet and how Jason Garrett was then going to blow it. But it didn't happen. I don't think the Cowboys are good. I didn't think they were good heading into the season. I didn't understand the respect they were getting. And I still don't think the Cowboys are good. I didn't think they were good heading into the season. I didn't understand the respect they were getting. And, um,

I still don't understand it. I just don't think it's a good team and you root for them. And I don't think you disagree. Well, I don't disagree. And I think it's like, I think Jason Garrett makes your team 20% worse. And if you're at 65% to start,

that's, that's not good. Do you run the math on that. On top of it all, they get the most dynamic player they picked up in the offseason, Tavon Austin. There's no way Jason Garrett knows what to do with that guy. I'm sorry.

He's on the wrong team. He'll walk off week four. You'll see. Yeah, they'll probably trade him. Last one, Eagles at Tampa. I have the Eagles by three. That's probably trade him. Last one, Eagles at Tampa. I have the Eagles by three. That's probably too low. We're going to split this.

It's three and a half. I said four. Yeah, it's still probably too low. I don't know. I have a confession to make. I think I remember this every year, and I get mad at myself that I didn't remember it earlier. Are we sure Fitzpatrick's like not terrible? No.

Like he's kind of half decent. We do this every year. We really were stupid to bet against him. We do this every year. He's like kind of half decent. Mm-hmm. I mean, you can make the case he's like this. It's early in the year, you know?

It's like he probably doesn't have the stamina to go a 16 16 game slate, but he could do a little damage in September, right? He was like the seventh best quarterback in the history of the Jets. Yeah. But he does, he makes plays, he's unafraid, and does have a way like galvanizing his teammates. Like there's no question when you watch the sidelines and the interaction and stuff, like the teammates like him and they're rooting for him.

And the rub is that he makes dumb throws every once in a while, but he does make shit happen. Like he is not, it's not like Kaiser Soso walking into that Packers game today where you're just like, oh my God, they have no chance. I mean, Fitzpatrick's kind of dangerous. Like, you know, rooting against them was 38 and 48 to 40. They had to get a first down. It was third and 11. I just needed the saints to get a stop. And I was kind of afraid of Fitzpatrick. I really was. I felt like he was going to make a play and then he did. And it's like, man,

maybe this guy's not awful. Maybe there's something to the fact that he, an Ivy league mind has like six weeks to prepare for one team. And you don't figure that in. But then come November, he's still an Ivy League player's body that you have to adjust the line for. So maybe they should just play him three times a year, like in week one, week seven, and week 13. Exactly. Here's the footage.

Here's 100 hours of footage. Break it down. Well, if they somehow win this game, and it's very conceivable because the Eagles, especially offensively, look just slow and like they're a few weeks away from getting to where they need to get to. You could make a case.

Just wave Jameis. Get rid of him. It's funny. I was looking at this game and I was like, oh, the Eagles are catching the Bucs at a good time. I said that this time last week. I was looking at this game and I was like, Oh, the Eagles are catching the bucks at a good time. I said that this time last week, you know, I was looking at that and I'm like,

wow, the bucks are catching the Eagles at a good time. Right. This is, this is right when you want them. But yeah, Jameis talk about the big loser. It was definitely Jameis Winston today.

Right? Yeah. I made a joke about him being the face of the XFL next year on Twitter. But you know, if, if you feel like there's no difference between those two guys and you feel like we're at the point of no return with Jameis as a character guy

who's going to be the leader of your team and be in the community and shit like that, you can make a case, just move on or trade him or dump him, trade him somewhere for a six round pick or something. But I personally, I would cut bait with that dude at this point. It's just

weird that we're so low on Jameis and Mariota. Not too many years after they were drafted. Yeah, Mariota still had that playoff game. He at least made it happen. Sunday night. I need both of these to tie you.

Well, your first one is the Cowboys of Dallas. Our home against Eli Manning, Saquon Barkley, and the New York Football Giants. I really wanted to nudge this to five. It's definitely in the Vegas zone. I'm going to say Cowboys by four and a half. All right, good. I get this one.

I said four, only three and a half. And I'm surprised too, because Dallas usually gets a little bit of a bump from Vegas. You might not be good. Yeah, no. Now we talked about last, are you ready to sign off on any last place division? You don't want to say Arizona yet. I will say Arizona. I'm not ready. I'm not ready. I don't, You can't tell me that the Niners couldn't finish last in that division. And I'll say the loser of this game, I think, is in last place. You like making dramatic guarantees two weeks into the season. Well, I just pray that by the end of the year, no one remembers them. So what do I have to lose?

My only dramatic guarantee is that Buffalo is not a playoff team. What were the odds on them to make the playoffs? I actually have this. I'm going to look this up. To make it, was it plus 600, plus 650 or something? Oh, no, you're right. It was minus 800 for them not to make it. Yeah.

That's still too low. What were you doing? They should update those odds. We don't see those again, do we? No, they don't like those. They don't want us to ever see those again. All right, I need this one to tie. Monday night, Mitch Trubisky and the Bears

hosting the Seahawks of Seattle. And the greatest punter of all time since Ray Guy. Michael Dixon, the most exciting punter. I was actually rooting on Seattle not to convert third down. So Dixon could come back out. I really wanted to see him in Ohio. I was genuinely enjoying it as a football fan. You like him better than our Dixon even. There's no question.

Dixon and I have had a renaissance. Dixon's like Ryan Fitzpatrick he is who he thinks he is that's true maybe we'll have to find out what Ryan Fitzpatrick's thoughts on Les Moonves are and compare notes and Dixon had some thoughts

on that Dixon will be like I'm going to Martha's Vineyard for 10 straight weeks and if you need me to negotiate stuff it'm going to Martha's Vineyard for 10 straight weeks. Yeah. And if you need me to negotiate stuff, it's going to be dicey, but I'll try. Right, right, right. And he is who he is. He is who we thought he was.

I have the Bears minus four over the Seahawks. Yes. I eked out a tie. I said two and a half and it's currently three. Oh, you're the Hugh Jackson of the Winsborough. That's right.

Eked out a tie. Congratulations. And you're eked out a tie. Oh, no. I don't know what they're doing. I got to say, I think that line's too low. I'm excited for that game now.

I really couldn't care less about it like six hours ago, but even though they lost, they're still two 0-1 teams. You know who's not good? It's going to be fun. You know who's not good? The Seahawks.

Yeah. That story that came out in SI about Pete Carroll favored Russell Wilson and the defense, and it turned the team against them, and there was so much bitterness and such a big divide and all that stuff. And I'm reading it, and I'm thinking like, why wouldn't he favor the franchise quarterback over a bunch of crazy guys on defense

who are all getting on in age and probably aren't going to be there two, three years from now? Isn't it the smart political move to back the quarterback? And also, why would- Yeah, probably. Aren't you trying to protect the confidence of your quarterback? And making sure that all of these outspoken dudes who are trying to bully him and get in his head, who are on his own team, that you're trying to protect that a little bit?

I don't know. One of the craziest things I've ever heard in my life from coming out of a team that they actually seem to genuinely believe is that they called that pass play for Russell Wilson in the Super Bowl so that he'd have a better chance of winning the MVP than Marshawn Lynch. Who said that? That was in those articles. They were convinced that it was all about trying to get the golden boy, the MVP. The Seahawks defense really believed that. It was like, go look at the sideline. The Seahawks sid really believed that. It was like, go look at the sideline. The Seahawks sideline is in chaos. They had no fucking idea what to do.

And Belichick's on the other sideline watching. That's a better excuse. I haven't heard, and I don't know why. So yeah, that might as well be it. I don't know why they would do that. Belichick was on the other sideline, should have called a timeout, and didn't, because it was so masked ass over on the other side.

It wasn't like they were in a heated argument about who should win the MVP. It was just moronic. I think the guys on that defense, I just think they got too crazy. They won that one Super Bowl, but you can pass this tipping point. We've seen this happen with other teams.

It happened in basketball a couple of times, like the mid-2000s Pistons. They had a lot of strong personality characters in their team. You can only ride that for so long. It just gets stale. Yeah. It was the greatest of all time. The 86 Bears? The 85 Bears? Yeah, that didn't last long.

February 86, yeah. They only made it back. They only made it that one time. Right. Well, congrats to congrats to you and Hugh Jackson for eking out ties this week. You guys can take half a Gatorade basket. Yeah. Take half a Gatorade bucket.

Uh, let's do parent corner. America's favorite segment. Oh yeah. Still no sponsor. You go first. I have a good one this week. All right.

Uh, I'm too stuck. I'll do, I'll do this one. Uh, so my son, he's four years old, uh, and he started soccer this week. Yes. I'll do this one. So my son, he's four years old and he started soccer this weekend. Yes. I saw the pictures. I was hoping this would be parent quarter.

Yeah. So he's, I'm going to say this. He loves playing basketball. We have a Nerf hoop at the house and he's always like watching TV. He like throws ball. He's taking shots while he's watching like Boss Baby or whatever he's watching, but he's always taking shots. I was like, that's great. He loves playing little league baseball. He started this year. He was one of the better hitters on the team. If we go to the beach, he has to bring a wiffle ball and a wiffle ball bat. He gets it. He connects there. So we just figured, we figured he'd be decent at soccer. What do you do as a four-year-old? There's no goalie. You have the ball, you kick it and you run down the field.

Well, he's, he's built a little bit like my son. Like he's just like kind of a block of granite. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. A little husky guy. Yeah. So I thought everything was going to be good. He gets there and I see him like lining up, like as a, like a field goal kicker for kicks, he's kicking and he's falling on his ass backwards. I'm like, Harrison, what are you doing? Like, I'm kicking the ball. He's getting mad at me for coaching. I was like, all right. So this goes on the whole game now because he's falling. Like, have you ever seen four-year-old play soccer? There's not a lot of spacing. There's not spacing. So they run in a herd and if you fall, you're in trouble. And he fell three times. He got stepped on, on his arm, on his ankle and on his face.

And I'm not like, yeah, and I'm not like, like you could see the cleat marks and no, like they were legit every time. So he's crying. And then I feel like the a-hole father has to go on the field and lift him up and like, no, you're not coming out. Just keep playing, you know, six minutes left. We could do this, you know, get in there. And, uh, and he hates it. He doesn't like it. He keeps falling and getting hurt. And to make it worse, his 10 year old brother who hates him, they hate each

other is, uh, calling him out anytime. He would almost touch the ball with his hand. He's like, he touched the ball with his hand. He's like telling the rep coaches paddling on. I'm like, all right, can you get it? Control yourself here. This is not the way that's going to be every week. Um, and then the other kid, the way that's going to be every week. And then the other kid, the other team has a kid who's good. I think the other team had like a six year old on there and he's scoring like every two minutes. So it's like seven to one. And I, it occurred to me, Harrison, my kid's crying and he like wants to walk off the field and occurred to me, Oh yeah. Cause on his iPad, any game he plays, if he's losing even one, nothing, whatever it is,

he'll just turn it off. He'll restart it. Yeah. You can't do that in life. Right now. So soccer is not his sport. And you know what? Then I was thinking about it and I was thinking about you and your daughter. I was like, you know what? I'm glad. I'm glad soccer is not a sport. I don't want him on a club. I don't want to give up my Sunday and go to travel six hours to some uninhabitable part of California and waste a day. So there you go. You're a big winner. That's right.

I'm a quitter. He's a quitter. Your family went 0 for 3 with soccer. You missed it completely. We did. So I had two different experiences with that because my daughter, who we always could tell from jungle gym days, was going to be a good athlete. And we put her in soccer and she was immediately one of the best ones. And it was like, right. In those games, there's always that one kid on each team. That's just, you can just tell. And she was the kid on that team. And it was great. It's like,

oh my God, this is so much fun. And then when we, when my son went to play soccer, it was the opposite. He was completely selfish, would get mad if somebody else on his own team scored and it was a disaster. And he lasted one game and he quit. And we have the one picture of him in the jersey and that's the only record of him ever playing soccer. So I've had both sides of it. Speaking of my son,

so I get this text from my wife on Friday. Call me. And I'm in the middle of a meeting. I'm like, is everything okay? And she's like, it's about Ben. And I think something terrible has happened. So I'm like, I'm in a meeting. Can I call you back?

And she's like, it's not a bad thing. Actually, just FaceTime him. So now I'm like, what the hell possibly could have happened? The only really things that have happened in his life is he made a travel baseball team. So he already made the team. I didn't know what else. It's not like his life's that interesting. I didn't know what else could have happened.

So I FaceTime him, and he tells me he broke up with his girlfriend their nine month their torrid nine month affair is is no longer this now he is how old those people who don't know

he turns 11 in November okay and has had this is he broken up by is he all so he's had they've been on dates

they've had on dates. They've had like four dates where my wife took him and she really likes this girl's mom. And they would go and they would go and the two kids would go to the movies and they would go drink wine next door. And they really liked everybody. And it was like one of those things where it was like, these two like each other. Like this could be it. They might actually get married. Like who the hell knows?

Ben's second day in school, his friend who also has a girlfriend in class breaks up with that girl. And like two hours later, Ben breaks up with his. And so on FaceTime was telling me, everybody's single now. Like it's like fifth grade is going to be a party. And I'm like, what are you talking about? You sound like a lunatic. You're Ted. Uh, and was all fired up. And then, um,

so when I got home, I got the full story, which is that this other guy, his, his buddy, Lucci also broke up and, um, Lucci, Lucci. So, uh, so we were calling him George all weekend. Cause it was like the Seinfeld episode where Jerry breaks up, but George state, and then George has to get married and he didn't want to be George. Um, so he was all excited that this is, I'm too young to have a girlfriend doing that whole thing. And then they texted all weekend and who the hell knows that are probably back together by this time. Oh, we might be back. People. I don't know. This just runs in knows? They're probably back together by this time.

Oh, he might be back? People, I don't know. This just runs in my family because you have nephew Kyle over here who is now, he's back on. And it might be my wife, might be the blood on her side. It's just like these on again, off again relationships.

Call me right now. Yeah, Kyle's girlfriend's calling him right now wondering where the hell he is. But I'm wondering if like Ben, yeah, probably like, yeah, maybe he's got a little now wondering where the hell he is. I'm wondering if Ben, maybe he's got a little Lenny Dykstra in him. He's on the traveling baseball team. He's like, I don't want to be tied down. I don't know. So anyway, the moral of the story is he's a lunatic and I don't know what to tell you.

That's the moral of the story. I love it. My wife's like, call me. Like I really thought something awful had happened. And it was my 10 year old son broke up with his girlfriend. That's excellent. So yeah, that's my parent corner for this week. It's really getting exciting in the Simmons house. Nice.

I can't believe no one will sponsor this. Yeah, how can they not sponsor that? 10 year old love. Yeah. And the two moms are texting each other all weekend because they're devastated. Oh really? We should still go. We'll still go out.

We don't need the kids. It's turning. They're more upset than the kids are. So anyway, good run. Nine month run. Long relationship. And then also today he saw nephew Kyle and taunted nephew Kyle about how he

broke up with his girlfriend, but Kyle wouldn't. That was the actual taunt, actual taunt. So does Kyle feel pressure or is he, does he just blow it off? No, Kyle beat the hell out of him. He threw him in the pool. He's not going to take crap from Ben. Ben's like four feet tall. Yeah, but he's got about eight months before he could not beat to take crap from Ben. Ben's like four feet tall. Yeah. But he's got about eight months before he could not beat the hell out of him.

They're definitely back together. I refuse to believe this breakup stands and she's probably going to dump him 20 times. Yeah. Can we go back to the fact that there's a feud with your 10 year old son and your four year old son? I don't know if we should. It's bad.

I mean, my 10 year old is not, it's our fault. He was not meant to be a middle child. And, uh, there's a big gap between them. And, uh, you know, he just doesn't understand. Like you can't tell him like your brother's four. Like, why, why are you getting upset? He's like, he doesn't ever learned anything. Yeah. Because he's four. We can't, we can't make any progress with that.

But, um, yeah, they did not like each other at all. This is, should you have a loser leave town match with that, with them? Unfortunately, I'm the loser. Cause I don't know how to handle it. Maybe you should leave town. Have a match and the loser leaves town and you're the loser and you'll just leave. By the way, he doesn't even want to lose. He just wants to leave town anyway. I told you he wants to live with Ken and Harry.

That's true. You got to update us on that during the season. I do think there is something about the kids not learning how to lose thing is an issue because, you know, like my son was playing, he learned how to play WWE, whatever, the 2K game. He would play two players, but would not, he would be in control of both controllers. So he's just playing against this person who's not there and beating the hell out of the other person i'm like how are how is this

good how are you i'm learning how to do moves we but you're not competing like you're not learning how to win and lose i don't know maybe yeah i don't like like my time play madden on the mobile madden mobile and like they'll be he'll play against the Steelers, let's say, and Roethlisberger throws. And you see Brown open in the end zone. And it's like a, it's like a race to restart the game before Antonio Brown catches it. He doesn't want to go down seven up.

I was like, no, you're going to play this out. You're going to lose. And, but that's only when I'm around. So I know they're shutting it off. And then,

yeah, this is how it rears its ugly head in real life. That's a benefit for Fortnite because in Fortnite you can't quit. You get killed and then your game's over. There's no way, there's no way to really rally from that. Sal, big day for you. Monday, 4.30, FS1. Lock it in. Tap it in. It's me. It's Rachel Bonetta. It's Clay Travis. It is Todd Furman. We're going to be making picks. We're going to be making bets. We're going to be playing games. David Arquette is our guest. There's a lot going on. David Arquette, the former WDCW champion, David Arquette? Yes, that's right. And it's live. What could go wrong?

It's live? It's live, like four second delay live. Yeah. Oh, so there's enough time for somebody to press something? I guess so. But, you know, four seconds. What's the number one thing we can look forward to tomorrow? Just a fat man that looks a lot like me sweating for an hour, probably. Okay.

Sounds great. That's about it. Good luck. Good luck with the new show. an hour, probably. Okay. Sounds great. That's about it. Good luck. Good luck with the new show. Thank you, buddy. Against all odds, Wednesday, the degenerate trifecta and I and Tate will have picks,

we'll have college and pro. By the way, the parlay kid bet has a future no ties this year. So it was a good three hours for him. He bet no ties? No ties was like plus 240 and he loved it. It was over before it started.

Can I make an against all odds request? Yeah, go ahead. I would love Harry's take on the US Open women's final. Okay. Oh, yeah. We didn't talk about that. No, we didn't. That was amazing.

We didn't. That was amazing. I felt really bad for Osaka. She beat the crap out of her and didn't get her due, right? It didn't feel as bad for Serena. No. I felt bad for the guy in the chair, too. He's still up there.

He refuses to come down. He's scared for his life. In Serena's defense, she didn't realize the coach was coaching. But the coach did coach. What is that rule? What is it? She looked over? Yeah.

And the coach was repeatedly gesturing for her to come up to the net more. And the umpire saw it and he gave her a warning. So what do you do? You can't make eye contact? What's being coached? I don't understand. Well, if the coach is telling her, you got to get to the net more. Oh, he can't even say anything. You can't hear him

say anything. So that was a warning and that spiraled it all out of control. But I just thought she would have lost anyway. I thought it was Osaka's day. She just had the eye of the tiger. It was awesome. Weird day. But anyway, I want Harry's take because I know it'll be one for the ages.

And Brad's, if you can get Brad's too. Okay. If you can publish Brad's. All right. Good luck tomorrow. Thanks, buddy. Good job on you. Good job on you. All right. Thanks so much to ZipRecruiter. Don't forget to go to ziprecruiter.com slash BS. Thanks to the Ringer Podcast Network and especially the Rewatchables tomorrow. Rounders, only on the Rewwatchables, me and Sean Fantasy.

We put a lot of time into this one. 20th anniversary this week. We are very excited about that. We were very excited to do this podcast. If you like this movie, believe me, it is the all-time deep dive on Rounders. Check it out. Thanks to SimpliSafe.

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who we taped on Friday and then who hung out with us and played Twitch on our ringer Twitch on Friday. It was fun. We played Fortnite together for an hour. We did not do that well, and I left her to die multiple times. Sorry, Katie. But that's coming up on Wednesday. We have some other guests.

A lot of good guests this month. A lot of good guests and a lot of sports to talk about as well. The BS Podcast coming back two more times this week, at least, until then. On the wayside On the first side of the river I'm saying I don't have to ever