The Bill Simmons Podcast - The 49ers in Shambles, a Possible RUSSurrection, NyQuil Bill, Yankee Hating, and Bad Parenting With Cousin Sal
Episode Date: October 21, 2024The Ringer's Bill Simmons is joined by Cousin Sal to discuss the end of the Mets' postseason run before reacting to another Jets flop (2:07) and identifying cross-off teams. Plus, the 49ers' rough sea...son continues as the Chiefs move to 6-0. They then get into Browns-Bengals (22:58), Lions-Vikings, Texans-Packers, and Falcons-Seahawks (45:13) before guessing the lines for NFL Week 8 (56:33). Then they discuss the Liberty winning the WNBA Finals (1:27:14), and close the show with Parent Corner (1:31:57). Host: Bill Simmons Guest: Cousin Sal Producer: Kyle Crichton The Ringer is committed to responsible gaming. Please visit www.rg-help.com to learn more about the resources and helplines available. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Coming up in action pack Sunday here on the BS podcast, Cousins Out next.
This episode is brought to you by Movember.
The mustache is back with a vengeance.
Look at Travis Kelsey.
Before he rocked that Super Bowl ring, he rocked that super soup strainer.
Grow a mustache for Movember.
You'll do great things too.
You won't win the Super Bowl, but your fundraising will support mental health, suicide prevention, and prostate and testicular
cancer research.
And if you don't want to grow a mustache,
you can still walk or run 60 kilometers,
host an event, or set your own goal
and mow your own way.
Do great things this November.
Sign up now.
Just search Movember.
It's the Bill Simmons podcast presented by FanDuel.
Football is in full action.
FanDuel's highest rated sports book
is the best place to bet it all.
We've been doing pretty well on million dollar picks this year.
I love the first month of the season
because you have to go into the season thinking,
I think Pittsburgh's gonna be good.
I think the Chargers are gonna be good.
I think Seattle's gonna be good.
And then trying to back what you think in those first few weeks and then
zag the other way.
If you were wrong, you could put out new and fun markets on Fandual like to
catch a pass, same game parlays, highest scoring game across the Sunday
slate, offensive TDs, the next drive.
They have so much stuff.
It's crazy.
The app is safe and secure and easy to use.
And when you win, you'll get paid instantly.
Plus look out for FDuel Squares this season.
Here's what you have to do.
Visit fandule.com slash BS to download
America's number one sports book.
The Ringer is committed to responsible gaming.
Please visit rg-help.com to learn more about
the resources and help lines available.
And listen to the end of the episode for additional details.
You must be 21 plus and present in select states.
Gambling problem called Win 100 Gambler
or visit rg-help.com.
We're also brought to you by the Ringer Podcast Network.
I have a new rewatchable coming for you on Monday, I hope.
It's scary month.
It's a little scary
because I'm not feeling that great right now,
but hopefully we're taping Hereditary tomorrow.
So you'll see Sick Bill talking about one of the scariest
movies of the last 15 years.
Stay tuned for that.
You can watch it on the Ringer Movies YouTube channel
as well.
You can watch all the clips and videos from this podcast
on the Bill Simmons YouTube channel.
Where last week, I did five episodes, holy shit.
Five episodes, including four and a half hours
of NBA Overrunners with Brasilo and House.
Had a great time.
The lines moved.
We even did a super boost over the weekend.
OKC, 55 plus wins.
Cleveland, 45 plus wins.
Phoenix, 45 plus wins.
Fandol Sportsbook boosted that up to plus 280.
You can jump on that before Tuesday night's games.
You could also go on the NBA page.
There's the Simmons future page
where you get a nice little 30% profit boost
for all of the futures heading into the season.
We have a really good track record,
so you should listen to us.
Anyway, hey, one ringer note,
Todd McShay has a new podcast launching for us on Tuesday.
It's called The McShay Show.
You've already been listening,
I hope, on the Recital Podcast on Mondays,
but The McShay Show will be launching on Tuesday,
so subscribe or follow wherever you get your podcasts.
Cousin Sal is next.
He's heartbroken the Mets are out of the playoffs,
but we get to make fun of the Jets and we get to complain about the WNBA officiating.
I can't wait! Let's bring it, ProJet! We're live Sunday night.
Justin Sal is here and I don't know what's he walk us through.
Walk us through your state of mind right now.
The Mets are done.
They're out.
One of your favorite baseball teams ever just tragically knocked out of Dodger
stadium tonight. And we lost our WNBA finals bet.
In a finals that could most generously be described as kind of rigged,
but we'll get to that later. How you feel about the Mets?
I don't even care if we get to that later or the Mets, but you're right.
I mean, this was a lot of fun. This team was a lot of fun to root for.
But I have to say, and you've been through this,
like in October baseball, like,
it's gonna be nice to not be scared to watch TV.
You know, like you get nervous watching.
I'll even say scared, and my kids are nervous and scared.
It's like watching the Shining, 12 of the last 14 nights
and not knowing the ending 12 of the last 14 nights and not knowing the ending
any of the nights. And it sucked. But I think as a fan, and maybe you'll agree with this,
the saving graces are we played a better team and our losses weren't close. So it wasn't like,
ah, damn. Right? So those two things make it a little less, a little more bearable. But
So those two things make it a little less, a little more bearable, but I love this team.
And I know people are gonna be like,
well, you paid $700 million, but it's not exactly true.
We had like 80 million in dead payroll
between Scherzer and Verlander and Hocktooa and Grimace.
Like they don't count on the cap.
But I like-
Who did you pick for Hocktooa?
I forgot about that.
Yeah, Hocktooa was big throughout the first pitch.
We won like 70% of our games, but I don't know.
They gave us some great moments
and I'm proud of some of them.
I really am.
It just feels like there's been a lot of sad sow this fall.
I know.
It's the year of sad sow.
It goes on.
It was like Seinfeld had the year of George,
we have the year of sad sow.
What could happen next?
I'll pick it back up.
I'll pick it back up. I'll pick it back up.
I'm excited, my Cowboys are very good
after beating that Juggernaut Steelers team.
Now I have hope again.
Right, the Cowboys had a bye week, so that was a positive.
Yeah, right.
Yeah, the Mets were overachievers,
and when you're overachievers,
you need to win a couple dumb games during a series
when you're playing somebody who's way better than you
and you never won the dumb game.
You just got, you just got killed in the losses.
I felt like it was Yankees Dodgers.
I have a lot of Yankees thoughts.
I'm happy to share them now to, to, to cheer you up if you want.
Let's do it.
Yeah.
I mean, I'm definitely rooting against the Yankees.
I have way more a-hole Yankee fan friends than I do Dodgers.
Well, I told you this off the podcast, but my dream was for the Yankees to make the World Series.
I thought the higher the stakes, the longer the fall would be.
Sure.
And everything I thought might happen that I prayed would happen with the Yankee fans
who haven't won a title in 15 years, who have bitched about Aaron Boone and Brian Cashman
for the last five non-stop ad
nauseam all the way through like pretty much three-fourths of the way through
the summer and now the Chess are puffed out again yeah cuz you beat the
Guardians and the Royals and your Chess are puffed out you hit 230 and nine
playoff games oh look out Big Ben Yankees are back. I can't wait for the Dodgers to just ram it
right up their sphincters.
I can't wait.
I can't wait.
I am such a Dodger fan between Mookie
and going against the Yankees.
I can't fucking wait.
I'm on a lot of cold medication too, by the way.
Wow. I didn't know that.
I can't wait. This is great.
Oh, Soto, what an epic.
He is in 15 pitches against some fucking pitcher I've never heard of.
OK, let's see it.
Let's see.
I'm sure Dodgers. I'm 100% cheered up.
I love it. Let's go.
I love it. Let's go.
The Yankees who haven't won jack shit in 15 years, they've won one title this century.
And now their fans think they're hot shit again.
And they're on brand at all times, and I fucking love it.
Good, good.
We just need those.
Go, go, go Dodgers.
Look at you.
And if it had been the Mets, I would have been like,
go Mets, but it's actually better
if they lose to the Dodgers.
Yeah, well, yeah, I mean, that's the scary part, right?
It's the worst thing of all sports,
if the Mets lose to the Yankees.
So I didn't really want to risk that
once I knew they were in there,
but I have to root for my team, of course.
But is this the first time,
when was the last time any league
got exactly the matchup they wanted?
Was it Warriors Cavs?
I don't even know if that was the matchup they wanted.
I guess those were the players they wanted, but.
Yeah. Yeah, I mean, this never happens in hockey, right?
Every year in hockey, we're like,
oh man, can you imagine if it's McDavid against so-and-so?
And it just never seems to happen.
And then in baseball, it's happening.
I don't remember what I just said the last five minutes,
but if it was something negative about the Yankees,
that's fine.
Literally five years of Aaron Boone
Is oh, he's got a go serial killer. He's got to go. He's murdering this team
Cashman's murder this team how and then they they the American League was awful
I mean, did you see that Royals team in the playoffs?
There's a team that made the playoffs
Then you go to the Guardians who their best pitcher was the closer who all of
a sudden couldn't get anybody out for some reason.
Right.
I love it.
Yeah.
It's listen, it's all home runs, right?
So they needed Soto.
They needed Stanton.
They needed judge.
They needed two of those three guys to produce and they got that.
And it's, it's right time.
I don't know.
Maybe, maybe they'll calm down with a few days off and stuff, but we have
to root against the Yankees.
I'm sorry.
And then this recency bias era we live in is like Stanton.
This is one of the best playoff Yankees ever. It's like you guys haven't won a World Series.
You guys won a million World Series.
We can name 40 Yankee batters over the course of history who are more important to the Yankees franchise than Stanton.
Yeah, because he has like 73 more playoff games than Yogi Berra because they were like three
and five series to get to the World Series
and that was it.
There's been seven Gatorade celebrations
because of this stupid sport that we've created
where every five days you get to celebrate again.
Anyway, go Dodgers.
Good luck to Mookie Betts.
I hope Otani, wouldn't it be great if Otani pitched
next round out of nowhere?
Oh, wow.
Oh, he should at least pitch to the last batter.
And where did Luke Weaver come from?
I'm in an American League keeper league.
Nobody had ever heard of that guy until three months ago.
And now he just pitches every game now.
He's throwing 130 miles an hour.
The Yankees make me so mad.
You know what I'm gonna do after this podcast?
I'm gonna console myself this podcast? Go ahead.
I'm gonna console myself with my four World Series DVDs from this century.
Wow.
Try to calm myself down.
Yeah, four times as many as Yankees.
And no offense, but I'm gonna watch the Mets documentary, Once Upon a Time in Queens.
I know the Red Sox are...
You can watch that.
That's a million years ago.
There you go.
20th anniversary of a lot of good stuff that happened with the Red Sox Yankees too.
Oh, that's right.
When everything turned.
Oh yeah.
Cough medicine bill.
I love it.
Yeah.
Oh, that's more than cough medicine, man.
It might be straight drugs.
I think I'd take fentanyl.
Did you?
We'll save WNBA for right before parent corner because I have some thoughts on that too.
He did.
Yeah, sure.
Yeah. NFL.
So week seven, I needed a name for this,
because week seven is when you really can't fool people
anymore, you kinda are who you are, you've been scouted,
if you have any holes, they're gonna get picked,
if you have any warts, they're gonna be pulled.
So I was thinking, I'm sure your wife has this,
my wife has it too, those circle makeup mirrors.
Where you can flip it and it like magnifies and if you flip it, you can, you look at your face,
you don't even understand what you're looking at, the pores are like so crazy.
You can flip it around and you get this nice, this is makeup mirror week so.
This is the week, there's no hiding.
You turn that light on, you're looking and it it's like, yeah, that's a zit.
Yeah, that's a mole right there.
Yeah, that's an old age spot.
Everybody who had those flaws,
the makeup mirror got shied to them this week,
including the New York Jets.
You're on fire today.
This is a good, this is a good.
When I'm on drugs, I'm always better.
This is the Naikul Ninja coming at us tonight.
I love it, I love it. No, you're right, the bad teams were terrible today.
They were absolutely terrible.
And I think we saw the top of the line teams emerge.
And you know how I know this, because, I don't know,
maybe I'm giving you a little bit of a hint here.
If you look at the week eight lines,
they look like real line segments.
They're not like one and a half, two, and shit like that.
So anyway, we'll get into that.
Well, we had Tennessee lost by 24 to Buffalo.
The Giants lost by 25 to Philadelphia.
New Orleans on Thursday night lost by 23 to the Broncos.
And Carolina lost 40 to seven to Washington.
And then my stupid team lost by 16 to the Jags.
But it was like, there was a little bit of a settling
of now we really have a sense of who the bad teams are.
You did get excited.
I don't know if you were loaded up on cold medicine
this morning when the Pats scored the first touchdown.
Cause you were,
We're up 10 nothing.
I know you hit us with a little bit of a text barrage.
I'm like, oh, I hope this holds here.
Well, what happened was we came to London with 10 plays.
Nine of them worked.
And then they were like, oh shit,
there's two and a half hours to go in the game.
What do we do now?
Should we hand off again to an eight man front?
Yeah, let's do it again.
Maybe Antonio Gibson will break through this time.
Makeup Maritime, the Jets, who we've had a fall guy now
two straight weeks or some sort
of magical licks or something was they fired Sala, they traded for Devante
Adams, even though you, it seemed like you could do whatever you want against
their defense.
And now the Steelers really kind of used and abused them tonight.
And now I guess the fall guy is going to be the kicker because he missed
another one, Zerloin.
Yeah, he has another one.
You know, they just fired Jeff Albrecht, the coach, you know, they got rid of, no, they
didn't.
I would have believed that.
Why not?
Aaron says, that's it.
That's it for you.
You get one shot.
Two and five, but smart Devante Adams trade.
He was just what they've needed.
They managed to not crack 20 points again.
Here's what they have for points this year.
19, 24, 24,
nine, 17,
20, 15.
And is that less or the same as last year?
Cause coming into this week, it was exactly the same,
I think, as a 20-23 offensive output.
Probably around the same output, right?
Yeah, that's it.
It can't be more. Yeah, they're bad. And the defense just isn't very good. You're probably around the same output, right? Yeah, that's it. It can't be more.
Yeah, they're bad.
And the defense just isn't very good.
They're not very good.
I'm done with them on prime time too,
even though I think we got like two more.
Bad news.
Two of the next four.
Yeah, night games.
Two of the next four.
Oh, they did it early so that in case he goes away
or something.
Oh, just God help us if they're flexed
in like week 14 or something.
But they, yeah, they're bad. I didn't understand that line at all.
I made it a rat line. It was two and four at four and two. If you look at Fandl,
the over under for wins for the jets was seven and a half for the Steelers. It was eight and a half.
I'm like, I'm staying away from this except for the Sal special. Yeah.
It's first half Steelers win the game plus eight 50. Did that hit?
God bless. It hit anybody Anybody who was on it.
Oh my God.
What is that, four times now?
Three?
I think it's three.
Three, yeah, but eight to one each time.
Oh my God.
So, yeah, good.
Good for the Jets.
Smart team.
You know, that line was super suspicious,
and then it moved by game time.
It was basically two and a half on Fandl,
Jets by two and a half.
I just felt like I had to just out of sheer respect for Mike Tomlin and just the whole infrastructure, I had to tease the Steelers to eight and a half. I teased the Overdown to 33.
Oh, I thought you teased them with the Mets. I was going to be upset.
No, I didn't do that. But it just seemed like we had a lot of disrespectful lines this week,
and all of them came back to bite whoever, right? The lines was disrespectful. The chiefs,
Mahomes as an underdog was just, I just can't believe that happened. But in this case, so I did
that and then you're watching the game and the Jets looked really good for about a half hour,
a little like the Patriots. And I'm thinking, oh man, and Russ is like, he got booed.
like the Patriots and I'm thinking, Oh man. And Russ is like, he got booed.
You probably were in, in Metz Hell, but I think his third series and he just looked
bad and, and just terrible pass to get booed.
And Collins Earth was stammering and it just seemed like it was going to go super
ugly. And then all of a sudden the game flipped.
Well, from what I saw and could gather, I had the game on also, but I wasn't
listening, but he threw some good passes, but he threw what's more
telling is his bad passes might fit this offense that Eli Manning,
underthrown, as long as it's one-on-one to Pickens, he's gonna maybe
get it more than five times out of ten and then you're all set. So kudos, and by
the way, they spend a million and a half dollars on both these guys, like fields and Wilson.
I don't blame the coach for being like, all right,
let's see what else we got here. You know,
like fields isn't exactly the franchise quarterback right away,
even though they're foreign too. So good job by them for now. Right.
We talked about it last Sunday that we thought fields, they won,
but he was bad last week. I didn't think he was good against Dallas either
and I wasn't surprised when they made this switch
but I'm so glad you brought up the deep ball offense.
We've been talking about this the entire time
you and I have been doing this podcast dating back to 2007
that if you don't really have a passing offense,
just fucking chuck it down Field.
And Pickens is among the best people to do that with.
He's really good at like slowing down, jumping in traffic, contest the catches.
I was texting our fantasy guys.
I was like, this is my dream offense.
I've been begging for everyone else dreams about like the West Coast offense or four verticals.
I'm like, I just want to see somebody chuck it down one of the sidelines
Just like it's either an interference. It's a catch. It's incomplete or there's what a 10% chance. It's picked But then it's like a punt
There's kind of no downside versus like having somebody just go back to pass and third and eight gets tipped at the line
Whatever. So Pickens is the perfect guy for it. And I felt like we have to change the name for that pass
We have to think of a name for that pass.
It's the Flacco.
Flacco perfected it.
I know you mentioned Eli and Eli definitely did it,
but Flacco, this was the Ravens offense in the mid 2010s.
Cause they were like, ah, just go back
and just fucking throw it.
I meant to write it down, but Collinsworth called it
something much more diplomatic.
It was much more like a tentative.
He was calling it Moon Balls. Moon Ball, yeah, these Moon Balls. But Collins worth called it something much more diplomat. It was much more like the tentative on it moon balls moon ball
Yeah, these moon balls, but I can it's not in a positive way. He was saying yeah, man
It makes me think of moon moon pie and roller ball with James Cahn. It's a great movie. It's bad
Futuristic violence Mike. It's so good the moon ball
Ross has got a boom. He's got crescent moon. Ross has got a boom, but he's got crescent moon,
he's got waxing, he's got everything, half moon.
He might as well moon us, Mike.
Might as well pull his pants down and moon us.
That's what he's doing with his offense.
Pickens seemed way happier.
You know, I never really know whether to believe this or not,
so I always try to read between the lines,
but it was interesting, some of the feedback
on the practice during the week was interesting, some of the feedback
on the practice during the week,
even Melissa Stark before the game,
like there's a real energy with this team.
We were there two weeks ago on the field,
the energy feels different.
So maybe the field thing was a little worse
behind the scenes with people feeling
like he could run the offense correctly.
They're also, I mean the other thing is
their running backs are healthier
than they were the last couple weeks.
So the Steelers are five and two.
Warren's nice when he's healthy.
Yeah, they could trade off between those two.
So this is one of my big, I mean,
pretty much all of my big ones before the year
except the freaking Jaguars.
But Pittsburgh and Seattle,
who's now in first place in the NFC West,
I'm feeling good about my futures
Jets two and five
At the Patriots next week
Home for Houston four days later on a Thursday night. That's a tough game because Houston's D line
I think is really good right at Arizona week 10
Home Indy week 11 on a Sunday night. So they're two and five.
What's their record in four weeks?
Would you go four and seven, five and six?
Four and seven would be, five and six is, wow, they're playing great ball and getting lucky, I would say.
But four and seven is more likely.
I mean, you can't say, the Patriots was their only, I don't know, they barely beat the Titans, and then they beat your team on a Thursday night.
Like there's no real game on the schedule
that they're definitely gonna win, right?
Well, on the flip side,
the kicker cost them week four and week five.
Yeah.
So you could talk yourself into whatever reality you want.
Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
Everything's close.
Like you can't say you definitely win an S,
definitely win an S, you know, so yeah.
I feel like I've watched an in and an amount of Jets this season.
And I don't know what the stats are.
Yeah.
Cause they're on or they're in London or they're at night.
It just feels like Rogers is getting hit a lot and now like he's just bleeding
all over, it's like a wrestler.
It's like a CM Punk or something.
Right.
It's bleeding all over the place.
Yeah.
It's a Tarantino film every time he goes out there for sure.
They don't feel like a playoff team to me, Sal.
I don't think so either.
I know we do this over and over and over again
with the standings, but just like,
Buffalo now has a three game lead over them in the division.
So I would say, unless Allen gets hurt, lock them in.
Pittsburgh and Baltimore in the north, there's three.
Houston in the south. There's three Houston in the South.
That's four.
And then chiefs.
And then I just like the chargers more than them had six.
So now they're battling against the Broncos, the Colts, the Bengals,
maybe Miami of two, it can come back in time, but so it's not, it's not dope.
Maybe nine and eight gets the seven seed.
That's their only path.
I don't think that's what they have to hope for because like I said, three, the rest of the way.
They don't have it up yet, but vandal had them at seven and a half before,
before today's game.
So they're like a solid seven win team at this point going forward.
I think they're going to have to up it by three to make the playoffs.
What's the funniest outcome?
Because I have an idea
Go ahead. Tell me yours. Let me see
Rogers asking for a trade on McAfee show on Tuesday
It's just didn't work
You know, I look around I see some other teams and maybe there's a better place for me
I just think that would cause a riot that That could shut down Twitter for the election,
which we probably need.
Oh yeah, yeah, do it Aaron, come on.
Do it Aaron, just float it out, float it out.
Aaron's out there, I see some holes at QB.
That or power forward for the Minnesota Lynx.
He's decided he's moving, he's changing.
That's it?
Yeah. Oh's changing. That's it? Yeah.
Oh my God.
Jets have the same, actually Miami has a half game lead
over the Jets and it feels like they're the most,
one of the four or five most unwatchable teams
in either conference.
And they have a better record,
they have a half game lead, how is that possible?
Our friend JJ was watching their game, he's a big Dolphins fan and screaming at the TV
Like I think I don't know what it is. He he I think he had more faith in
Who's that idiot that comes in at the third string to boil?
To boil then the the other 15 of us sitting in the room watching but yeah, that's not a fun thing
Is he still there? Is he just slumped on a chair?
Did you leave him there?
What happened to him?
He did.
Oh, the Yankee enthusiasm turned on a dime real quick.
Didn't take much.
So he had a lot of swagger
because of the Indians' Royals win, sorry.
Yeah.
We're gonna take a quick break for the podcast.
Get ready to tackle the NFL action with Fandl, America's number one sportsbook right now.
New customers can bet $5 and they get 300 bonus bets if you win.
Fandl sportsbook app gives you everything you need to place live bets on the NFL on
one place.
Get a hunch in the middle of the game.
Check out the latest stats.
If you live play by play and so much more on the same page where you place your bets, just visit fandel.com slash BS.
To join today, you'll get started with $300 of bonus bets.
If you win, you are first.
$5 bet.
Never waste a hunch.
Make every moment more with Fandle,
an official sportsbook partner of the NFL.
You must be 21 plus and president of select states
or 18 plus and President DC.
First online real money wager only.
Five dollar first deposit required.
Bonus issued as non-redrable bonus bets
which expire seven days after receipt.
Restrictions apply.
See terms at sportsbook.fandl.com.
Get a problem call 1-800-GAMBORG
or visit rg-help.com.
Before we get to Chief Steiner's
off that Jets conversation, cross-off teams?
Seven weeks?
Can we come up with seven right now?
I think we can.
I don't want to go back on this though because we've been criticized about crossing teams
off and then like the Giants, we crossed them off.
Like the radical left, the left, the right, the far right.
It was the red states?
Who's criticizing us?
Remember the swift boat people?
Oh, the swift, damn.
No, no, but so we crossed off the giants
and we brought them back.
Let's just keep teams crossed off.
What's the worst that's gonna happen?
No, how about this?
We'll keep the giants crossed off.
We were right.
Yeah, all right, I'm good.
Well, these three are crossed off.
New England, Carolina, and Cleveland.
Panthers, Patriots.
They're all one and six. They're done. Yeah, and Carolina
Lombardi said this on my pod on Thursday
I think and I I actually think he might be right that this is the worst team of the decade now this Carolina team
Really gone worse every week. They were down 37 nothing today and they weren't even like yeah
Maybe we should throw Bryce Young out there. They didn't even do that. I was just gonna say, you know
It's bad when he's has, he's pretty much set to
come back week eight after how bad he was.
Yeah.
So, all right.
So those three for sure.
I think Tennessee at one and five.
I don't see a path for them.
They're awful.
They gave up 27 on answered to Buffalo today.
That was my best bet.
And people killed me. Be like, uh, I did have some reluctance once they switched from, uh, from Will
Levis to Rudolph and then Fandl made it went from eight and a half to nine.
I'm like, all right, I'm not going to overthink this.
Rudolph's a 59% passer.
You know, the bills will demolish them at home.
It took a minute, but they did.
Now you're really close for a second.
All right.
So there's four, two and five teams. I don't think the jets at home. Took a minute, but they did. Now you were close for a second. All right, so there's four.
Two and five teams.
I don't think the Jets are a cross off yet.
Okay.
Vegas?
They just lost,
you know it's bad when it's like,
oh no, Aiden O'Connell's hurt.
Oh no, what are we gonna do?
We don't have Aiden O'Connell.
Port Minchuk comes back, which is one of my favorite
football scenarios every year when the guy gets benched
and then has to come back in a week later.
Really tough.
What's the marital equivalent of that?
Like, I'm moving out, I'm having an affair with my assistant.
Then a week later, like, hey honey, I'm back!
Hey!
I'm back.
It didn't work out.
Sorry. Hey, you didn't put my didn't work out. Yeah. Yeah, sorry.
Hey, you didn't put my stuff in the attic yet, did you?
Minchey was just back, and by the way,
he was just as terrible as he was before he got benched.
Yeah.
Their fight, well, I mean, the coach is hilarious.
The only reason to watch them is to watch them
kick a field goal down seven or eight, whatever.
Well, no, let's hit this.
We can wait.
It's 20 to 12.
There's four minutes left and it's fourth and goal from, I think the four.
Yeah.
And first they get a false start, which is just like that.
That's the last level when you're like the Patriots absolutely would have a
false start in that situation.
The worst coach teams are always going to do something dumb in that spot.
So now it's fourth and nine.
They're up eight and you still have to go for it.
Cause even if you don't get it, they're stuck inside the 10.
Maybe you'll get a pass interference in the end zone.
You're basically turning a one touchdown game into a one touchdown game.
There's no reason to do it.
None that I can think of.
No, and then kicker in and kicks it.
At least line up to draw them off size
and try to get five yards closer
and then you're definitely going for it.
But you should be going for it anyway
because guess what, look at the scoreboard.
You have 12 points against the Rams defense.
It's not your day, so you're not gonna get down there
three more times, two more times, another time.
So yeah, go for the touchdown there.
But anyone who had the spread. So I think you're right with the, because they have five losses, they more times, another time. So yeah, go for the touchdown there. But anyone who had the spread.
So I think you're right,
because they have five losses,
they have the Chiefs twice.
Two and five, they're done.
They have the Chargers and they're at the Bucs.
So they're gonna have nine for sure.
They're one of the most poorly coached teams in the league
and they have bottom five quarterbacks.
It's a pretty tough combo.
I mean, I even like the Pat situation more
because at least we can move the ball.
So that's six, right?
Six teams?
Vegas, Giants, two and five.
Yep.
Tennessee, New England, Carolina, Cleveland.
And then if we want to do a sixth,
I can offer you the two and five Jags,
the two and five Jets,
two and four Miami, or the two and four Rams.
And I wouldn't cross off any of those, I don't think.
All right, yeah, we got some time, but out of those, I would say, uh,
Jags, I would probably be the most excited to cross off just cause I'm not
buying just cause you beat the one of the worst coach, least talented teams
in the last couple of years.
I'm not going to sorry.
A party.
Yeah.
If this was an NCAA field, they're the first, first buy.
They're the first one coming in.
If we have to kick somebody out.
You think Doug got a window or is he in the aisle?
Where is he?
Coach middle seat?
Coach, he's not middle seat Doug in the fight home.
I think that-
No, you got to say coach middle seat.
That's half the joke.
Coach, because he's flying coach and he's middle seat.
But he's also coach.
Coach middle seat. Coach middle seat also coach. Coach middle seat.
Coach middle seat, yeah.
Okay.
You like that more than middle seat duck?
I don't know, I think I do.
But no, he got an extra bag of peanuts, that's it.
I guarantee nobody notices, but so they're up,
I forget they're up maybe 13 or 15.
It's a two score game. And it's like fourth and two in the fourth quarter.
And Doug decides to go for it.
If it's a field goal, he's up 18.
We had, now it's a three possession game with 10 minutes left and we have no
offensive line and it's Ted Doug goes for it for reasons that remain.
I like the games.
We've lost the ability for coaches
to just say, hey, if I do this, now the game's over.
People are like, no, if we go for fourth and two,
maybe we, I don't even know what the rationale is.
Anyway, we stuff them.
Pat's come down and they score.
And Mayo, who needs a nickname, maybe he's middle C Bay.
I don't even know what his nickname is.
He's just awful.
He's just an awful coach.
Goes for two down nine and we don't get it.
Right.
And that's it.
And the reason he had to go for two
was because earlier in the game on a PAT,
we jumped off sides and then they went for two and got it.
And they went up.
So instead of being up 14, they're up 15.
Cause they got a yard closer.
Yeah.
So now we have to chase the PAT when we score
and we don't get it and we stay down nine and we're done.
And Mayo had some just classic quotes after the game.
The guy doesn't move during the game.
He doesn't, there's no coaching whatsoever.
Poorly, poor planning.
We have no strategy past the first half
of the first quarter.
We have multiple guys grumbling after the game.
Kendrick Boren's agent today after the game did this Instagram post, like
congratulating Kendrick Boren for his professionalism because they told him he
was going to be healthy scratch.
And then somebody was sick and he ended up playing last minute, caught a touchdown.
Then he's talking shit about Polk the rookie and how he's got to get out of
this mental state he's in and Polk's like, like I'm fine I just need to make some plays. This is just such a train wreck I
can't believe this was like Kraft's hand-picked guy who by the way he
hand-picked like six years ago and openly talks about it.
Guy was on Belichick's coaching staff. Out of everything you just said the
thing that surprises me most is that Kendrick Bourne has an agent, but I'll believe you.
But yeah, we were saying earlier, this is a bad year for Mayo.
With the Will Levis and the coffee and your coach, really, it was down.
Just a rough year for Mayo all around. Yeah, some recent health studies that came in.
It was down on the condiment rankings.
He gives this interview after, and he's like, we're just a soft team right now.
We're a soft team.
It's like, boy, the coach,
I bet the coach is gonna really lay it to,
oh wait, you're the coach.
You're responsible for whether this team is soft or not.
We don't have physical practices.
Oh, I'm sorry, it was KJ Osborne.
Kyle reminded me.
I got KJ Osborne and Kendrick Lam confused. Oh, he has me. Yeah, KJ Osborne, Kyle reminded me. I got KJ Osborne and Kendrick Lord confused.
Oh, he has me.
Yeah, KJ Osborne.
Is that less surprising than he is an agent?
It's exactly the same.
My bad, KJ Osborne.
I mixed up our anonymous receivers
who are probably getting paid too much money.
But yeah, we have a soft team, according to Gerard Mayo,
who is the person in control of every practice.
Don't you immediately lose the locker room
if you say you have a soft team?
I think he already lost it.
What's the rumblings like between the punter
and the free safety?
Like, our coach says we're soft.
Are we?
I don't know.
Maybe we are.
Stupid penalties.
They have terrible play calling.
You know, who jumps off sides on a PAT?
Like that's, that's sign alone
that you have no idea what we're doing.
This guy, he's been just awful.
You're down to three and a half wins on Fandl.
And through shade to Belichick this week too,
about like shaded him on the roster.
It's like, you wouldn't have a career
if it wasn't for Belichick.
He was the guy who gave you coaching chance.
And you're butting up with Kraft.
I'm just disgusted by the whole thing.
All right, so we have six cross-up teams.
Well, hold on, let me look at this real quick.
Cause you have three.
No, no, we have the six.
New England, Carolina, Cleveland, Tennessee, Vegas, Giants.
Crossing them off.
That's it.
And we can't bring them back.
It's not like JJ changing his survivor pick every week.
Gotcha, right.
Yeah, you guys, wow, you have the lowest win total.
Three and a half.
Listen, before the season, as I repeatedly just picked Pats unders and all the unders
and you were getting mad at me and like they can't block.
They're poorly coached and they've had a bunch of defensive injuries already.
The thing is, May is good.
And you know, that's the thing.
Yeah. He's legitimately good.
You only have to root for him.
Isn't it nice?
You don't have to root for this team.
All this other nonsense with the coach and everything's fun.
He's going to be gone anyway.
You have one player to root for and that's nice.
You can, you can concentrate your efforts on Drake May.
No interceptions today.
Right.
Super fun to watch.
I thought he made the nerds will come out
with all of their like advance
where they break down the plays and give him the ratings.
I guarantee his ratings are good in that game
because he did a lot of good stuff and we can't block.
And drops, terrible drops in the first half.
Chiefs Niners, so Mahomes now moves to 12,
one and one as an underdog.
And I'm gonna posit you with this question because that was the stat.
That was the reason I picked the chiefs.
I'm not going to, I almost swept a million dollar picks today.
I did.
I lost the backers by half point.
It was four and one.
I just missed it.
So is my home's 12, one and one as another dog?
I think that's what it was.
Or are the chiefs 12,1-1 during the Mahomes era
playing off the tweet that you did today,
which I thought was a really good tweet
about the defense.
Oh, the defense.
Yeah. Go ahead, do your thing on this.
Well, it's just the most underrated unit,
I think, of the decade, Spagnola, right?
Like the Chiefs keep them in all these games,
all the important games.
You could blame it on the refs or whatever else.
It's the defense that has them there.
And especially this year you have,
what does he have, six touchdowns,
eight interceptions, Mahomes?
He better not be tops for MVP.
I know they're undefeated, I get it.
But they're the reason he's in this.
What happened with him?
He like, he coached the Rams, he got fired,
and then he was just like,
you know, he just became the best defensive coordinator
because nobody wanted to take a chance with him again.
It's great.
He's excellent.
A completely, I guess an overpaid defensive coordinator slash specialist, right?
He's paid as a head coach or close to a head coach, but just wants to run the
defense and he's going to go in there.
70.
Yeah.
I think there's a chance he could go in the hall of fame as an offensive coordinator.
Interesting.
But overshadowed by Andy Reid all the time, right?
All we heard about was his record off of by
and Mahomes, like you just said, record as an underdog.
You don't hear about Spagnola.
That defense is excellent.
Really good.
The defense is the reason they won the Super Bowl.
They were a four and five in the red zone today,
which really helped.
And then you mentioned Mahomes, 154 yards,
zero touchdowns, two picks picks had a rush TV for the season six touchdowns eight picks
He is not top 1400 yards yet, and I would say he's probably as a fantasy quarterback probably in the 20s
Oh, yeah, but gotta be like QB 22 or something like that. He didn't have a great
He had two great plays today one he decked Mustafa the safety for the touchdown.
I love that.
He seems bigger this year.
And then he's mastered the I'm gonna run out of bounds.
Oh, actually I'm not, I'm cutting back in play,
which feels like it's cheating.
Yeah, they should almost allow that extra step then
because if you take a hit at him on the sidelines.
But yeah, it really is.
It's like, ah, my father could kick your father's ass.
So watch, watch what I could do, you know, like, oh, we gotta let them get away with
it. What are we going to do?
You know, well, it was one of the biggest, biggest things to the games.
The other thing that happened today, did you see the movie Frost Nixon?
Oh yeah, sure.
Really good, right?
Now, like famous, one of the great interviews of all time, famous interview immortalized in a really good movie.
We'll see what happens with Brady Mahomes.
I don't know if you saw that interview,
but it was really the Frost-Nixon of this decade.
Yeah.
Really some hard-hitting questions,
some really in-depth answers.
I was riveted, so good.
Do you remember after the AFC title game and I came over and I said, Hey
man, I wish you luck.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I do remember that.
Then they cut to like a wide shot of the stadium.
Next question.
Right, right, right.
These interviews are so bad.
Why do they have this?
They spend like a kajillion dollars with 17 cameras filming them.
And it's the worst content you could possibly have
Yeah, and I don't like it's like and by the way, I was about to compliment them
I was like, well Brady's gotten better like whatever you might he might not be your favorite
But we know what he is now and he's like he's in the flow of announcing, you know
But then these interviews first of all interview Jackson Mahomes or the or the wife or something.
Anything can be better.
But the one thing I don't like that Brady does is like, oh,
the this guy was the bane of my existence.
This guy, this coordinator was a bane of my and he was a bane of was like,
you're the winningest, winningest position player of all time.
You never lost to anybody.
Yeah, you beat everybody. Yeah.
It's like Howard Stern asking, oh, how much you, wow, you make $4 million a year.
It's like, shut up.
You make $400 million.
Shut up.
Enough.
We're not buying this.
This guy was the bait of my existence.
I would have had a 900 winning percentage if not for this guy.
That was just $899.
He's getting a little better as a game announcer, but he also has a bunch of ticks now that
he's got to get rid of.
He always says like, and again,
what I was saying about the receivers,
like he's always bringing us back to something
you said 10 minutes ago.
It's like, just keep going.
It's been great for Romo,
because I think it's been a really strong Romo here.
Meanwhile, the Niners are not just our leaders
for the year from hell.
I think they've just about locked it down.
Like, Ayuk looked like he tore his ACL.
It seems like they fear it and we'll find out officially tomorrow.
Should we cross them off? Is that what you're getting at?
No, but there are three and four.
I know.
Pirty threw picks today on the KC 34, on the KC 31, and on the KC 5.
And there was a question,
remember last year, it'd be like,
yeah, sure, Brock Purdy's doing well,
but what would he be like with all these weapons?
And it's like, today we found out,
or did we find out, because I still like Purdy,
but that'll be the game people pointed.
This is what happens when you don't have weapons, he sucks. You know, because I still like Purdy, but that'll be the game people point to. This is what happens when you just have weapons, he sucks.
You know, I blame myself, I think,
because you and I have flip-flopped on Shanahan a lot,
and I know I've flipped on Purdy a lot,
and like three weeks ago, I was like, that's it, I'm done.
He's really good, he's very, very good.
Not even for a miss or irrelevant.
He's very good at what he does.
And then since I made that statement,
I don't know what's going on.
But yeah, again, and we gave the Chiefs Defense credit,
but what's left now for these 49er receivers?
Is it just Kittle?
They got the guy who got shot, Ricky Pearsall's in there,
but without Samuel and without Ayuk,
it's definitely a different team.
And McAfee, of course.
Yeah, the year from hell,
if we're looking for signs for the year from hell, maybe a
guy getting randomly shot during a robbery right before the season who was a first run
pick is probably about as good of a sign as you're going to get.
And that guy's back before McCaffrey.
Yeah.
Right.
So somehow they're playing your stupid team next week on Sunday night.
That's why I needed them to win today.
And if the Niners lose, they're three and five heading into the bye. After the bye at Tampa, home Seattle, at
Green Bay, at Buffalo. So they could potentially be three and five walking in
that. What's your team's record? You're three and three? Yeah. high. So, I'm not crossing off the Niners as a playoff team,
but I don't think they're even close to being one of the five best teams in the NFC.
They've had too many injuries.
I think the three best teams are in the NFC North now in the NFC, right?
I would go Detroit, Minnesota, and Green Bay over any other are in the NFC North now, in the NFC, right? I would go Detroit, Minnesota, and Green Bay
over any other team in the NFC.
Yeah, you know, maybe I'll feel differently tomorrow,
but I have an irrational affection for the Bucs.
But I don't know, maybe they're on the outside looking in.
But yeah, you're right, the Niners needed this.
I know they had injuries and everything,
but if this is not an FU game to the team
that beat you in the Super Bowl on a questionable call
at the end and everything else,
when are they ever gonna beat a team like this?
How about this?
Who's your two seed in the NFC right now?
Your choices are Washington, Tampa, or Seattle.
Those are the three teams leading their divisions right now.
Like we could.
I'll go Tampa, I would go Tampa.
You take Tampa?
Yeah.
They really could be five and one.
It's a pretty big two seed.
Because then you're playing the seven seed in round one
and then you're getting the winner of
basically anyone underneath you in round two.
So it's not like a small thing to be in the two seed.
All right.
More stuff that happened.
By the way, that Chiefs Stanners game, I just think the Chiefs, it almost, they've
hit that point that the Pats hit at some point that the Colts hit near the end of
the 2000s where it almost like doesn't matter who those, who their skilled players
are.
Yeah.
Like even Carson Steele was out there for getting big first downs.
So it just doesn't matter.
And they're coaching their infrastructure.
Like, they just kind of hang around and then they, they know they're going to win
the game, you know what I mean?
You don't think Mahomes is struggling is more than he has been.
Yeah.
But I'm saying like, they just hang around these games and then they win them
and you just know they're going to win.
I never doubted they're winning that game today.
Right. Yeah. They weren't going to, they don't blow leads like that. Yeah, that's... We're dumb. We're dumb. We should always just take the
Chiefs. Like I know they're gonna get tripped up by someone stupid, but the games you think it's gonna happen just
doesn't.
Well, didn't JJ go against them today? Who's agged against them?
JJ, yes.
Is it JJ?
Yeah.
Yeah, it was JJ.
Yeah.
Who's agged against him? JJ.
Yeah.
Yeah, wasn't it JJ?
Yeah.
JJ.
He's like, Juan Soto, 14 pitches.
Juan Soto needs to catch passes.
14 pitches nodding after every pitch,
because he knew, I can't wait.
I can't wait for the Dodger fans to stick it to them.
So they got to lose and Soto's got to leave the team.
That's the best.
We don't need to get back to baseball,
but that would be just the best.
Yeah. Bengals beat the Browns. Desha't want it. We don't need to get back to baseball, but that would have just the best. Yeah.
Bengals beat the Browns. The Sean got hurt. Looks like a torn Achilles.
So I wrote this down. I'm just going to read it to you. So, yeah,
I can't even come up with the Deshaun take it's in the running for the least fun start to finish sports story in this century that didn't involve a murder.
Are we sure it didn't involve a murder?
Yeah. that didn't involve a murder. Are we sure it didn't involve a murder? Well, yeah, pretty sure. Evidence is out.
Wait, like, can you think of a less fun week to week sports story
than Deshaun goes to Cleveland?
No, I get it's too much.
It is devoid of entertainment from start to finish.
And I felt bad.
I always feel bad when an athlete gets injured today, but, you know,
the fan base is like, finally it's just everything about, James had an incredible like two
and a half minute monologue in the locker room after about, uh, the Sean, but
it's just, he's good for those.
Yeah.
And then I was surprised that he wasn't the number two guy.
DTR had to get hurt first and Dory Thompson Robinson for James to get it.
And then I'm looking, I'm like, all right, maybe Stefanski finally through injury has
the setup he wants.
Probably not, but you know, 21 14 against the Bengals, they clawed back in it.
They actually, uh, the Bengals had a hard time moving the ball in that game.
T Higgins had, that was the first game where sometimes that would happen to Bengals in
previous years where T Higgins feels like he's more important to the game than Chase
does.
And that's when you know they're humming.
And they've also finally figured out that they got to keep Chase Brown on the field.
That he's just got to get more touches.
So would that shock me if that team made the playoffs?
No.
What are their fan duels right now?
Well, let me know.
It's going to be like minus T20. Yeah, minus T do odds right now? Well, let me know. Like minus two.
Yeah.
Minus T 20.
Oh, you talk about the Bengals.
I'm going to look this up.
Uh, the minus one 24 to make the playoffs.
Oh, they're minus.
Yeah.
So plus one Oh two for the note.
And they're kind of easy to figure out.
You know, a lot of these teams we talk about, we can't figure out the teams with
the good defenses, they can't really score against.
Like, like what happened with the giants the other night?
Right.
Like, you know, don't, don't forget they had a kick return for touchdown today.
Otherwise the pretty stagnant offense against the Browns.
What?
And so who did they lay it on?
They laid it on the Panthers and that's it.
I don't, I'm not sure the Ravens and the Ravens don't have a bottom three defense.
Say what you will about it.
If you don't lay it on the Panthers, there's something wrong with you.
Let's, uh, we'll take one more break for the podcast.
Okay.
Lions, Vikings, lions 31, Vikings 29, another game where I didn't understand the
line and then it seemed like the Vikings were gonna win.
They had the ball, they had a chance to put the game away.
Could not get the first down they needed.
Detroit gets the ball back.
Goff makes a couple plays.
I thought Detroit was better in the game.
And Minnesota almost stole it.
But then you look at the stats after the game
and everything was pretty even.
Yards were even, first downs, like a lot of the stuff,
it was a more even numbers game,
but I didn't feel that way watching it.
I thought Minnesota was lucky to be hanging around,
and if they stole that game, it was like,
Jesus, what do we have with this Vikings team?
So anyway, I thought the right team won,
but I thought it was weirdly a good loss
for the Vikings too.
Yeah, definitely, because we're watching that game.
I think part of us at least thinks,
all right, Sam Donald's slide has to start somewhere.
Why not now?
It really wasn't bad.
It was like 22 for 27.
He made some big throws.
They got back in that game.
It would have been a really bad loss for the Lions,
and it would have just been like,
all right, the Vikings are back to two years ago,
where they win every one score game.
But Goff has been, are you talking about like MVPs?
Like he really, I'm trying to think of his number.
So he was 18 for 18 against Seattle.
He was 22 for 25 against Minnesota.
His numbers have been really good, uh, lately.
What are his, what are his MVP odds?
Cause they're going to get a one seed.
So why wouldn't-
MVP odds are plus six 50.
Mahomes is plus three 70, which I'm guessing is just cause there's so much action on him. They can't move it up too high. Lamar's five to one.
Allen's five to one. CJ's plus 950. Jordan Love, who was not good today, was 13 to
one. Right. And then, uh, so our, our thing, our, our cheat thing is that it's a top
two seed, right? Lions get closer and closer to that one seed every week, I
think.
I thought Goff was awesome today because they were coming after him.
And there were a couple times when it seemed like old Jared Goff,
when he was going back to pass, there were guys around him and it was like, here's the Goff.
He just doesn't throw those plays anymore.
And he had, there was one throw he missed in the fourth to Raymond,
the Holy cross kid, where he was deep down the sidelines.
And for some reason he just kind of sailed it a little bit out of bounds and it
would have been like a 70 yard touchdown. But for the most part, I thought, uh,
I thought he was really good. I gotta be honest.
I thought that game felt like an NFC title game. The vikes kept coming back.
The crowd was great. Jefferson had a couple of really good moments. Aaron Jones, who wasn't supposed to play all week.
Yeah.
He was really, really good again.
Yeah.
And that, I thought that game felt like a playoff game
and Packers Texans felt like a play it.
Both of those felt like round two or round three playoff games.
Yes. I agree with you.
And not that it matters because he's probably not coming back.
He's talking about coming back for the Super Bowl.
But I also think the Lions would have put them away with one or two Aiden Hutchinson plays, right? I agree with you. And not that it matters because he's probably not coming back. He's talking about coming back for the super bowl.
But I also think the Lions would have put them away with one or two Aiden
Hutchinson plays. Right. Like if he was in that lineup, I was like, all right,
this, this would have been like a 12 point game or something going, you know,
midway through the fourth, but.
I'm sure they're going to trade for some pass rusher, right?
These teams always magically find enough money,
especially because the guys get paid game by game.
So the closer you get to the middle of the season, it's a little cheaper to be able to add the person, but I'm sure they'll get some.
Max Crosby is probably one of them.
I mean, all the, all the parody accounts are more and more believable every week.
So you have to think that he's on his way out.
What would they get for Max Crosby?
Is that, that's gotta be at least a first, right?
First than something else.
Yeah.
Isn't he pricing that? I would think, yeah, yeah. Isn't he priced at that?
I thought he just signed an extension.
I thought they'd get.
I don't know anyone's deal.
Somebody on the Browns maybe,
if the Browns are just like that.
They were talking about Miles Garrett throwing.
Miles Garrett, that's, I mean,
cause on the Pats they were talking about Uche,
who's like basically a third down specialist guy.
So then in the Packers game,
which was a great back and forth,
the Packers win, somehow don't cover. and forth, the Packers win somehow don't
cover.
Line was either two and a half or three.
Packers win by two.
And the big story, I guess, is that a Packers kicker came through.
Brandon McManus, who landed on the Packers on shaky terms to say the least, but ended
up there and finally made a kick for them.
So, their defense won the game.
I mean, Stroud was pressured on 48% of his drop backs.
He threw for 86 yards.
No, Nico Collins.
I think that might've killed the passing title for him.
The Texas were running the ball 25 for 115, but they had the game, Sal.
It's inside the two minute warning.
They're down two, but they get a first down.
Green Bay has all three timeouts.
And there is a way to finagle that, whereas try to run the ball or quick passes,
make them burn all the timeouts, maybe try to get as close as possible,
maybe even get the first down.
They didn't really do it,
and then they threw an incompletion on third down,
so the Packers gotta save a timeout,
kick to go ahead by one,
and it just felt like the Packers were gonna come back down.
And I didn't think Love was very good today,
but I just felt like they were gonna
get a field goal in that one.
He was off a little, and if you look at the stat,
I was with you, I had Packers minus three,
and it was so frustrating that it's gonna come down
to this one or two point, extra point thing,
and I'm looking at the Houston stats,
like Tank, Dell, and Diggs at one point
in the fourth quarter, I had like seven yards combined.
Like how are they still in this?
What is going on here?
But I think you hit on it early.
This is a very, very good defensive team.
They have the top two ranked safeties on PFF,
like one and two.
So how do you throw out?
They're gonna embarrass even the best quarterbacks.
I mean, Stroud had 10 completions all day.
Yeah.
We thought going in that that had a chance
to be the second most talented team in the NFC.
And after watching football for seven weeks, I think they might be.
But those three are definitely the three best teams.
I don't know if Seattle, they have some injuries.
They're going to, you know, we'll see what we have with them.
What guys get back.
Nobody in the NFC East, I think is on the level of those guys.
And then Tampa, just cause the way their offense has been moving the ball.
I think you got to take them seriously, but I wouldn't put them on the level of those.
No, maybe not.
But every Packer fan would sign off on five and two
after love got hurt throwing out Hail Mary in Brazil.
Oh yeah, in that stupid Brazil field, yeah.
I wanna see the Packers end the Texans in December,
because the Texans will have Nico Collins back,
they're gonna get some offensive line,
they'll fix some of that. December?
Yeah, two months from now. Oh
Can that happen? What do you mean? No, not them playing each other. I just want to see the two teams
Cuz like wow, did they realize I think both of these teams are in December are gonna be like kind of built for
Playoff football, right? Yeah, especially if they get some guys back. So Seattle beat Atlanta
I had this for million dollar picks too. I had Lombardi on Thursday and both of us really liked Seattle for some reason. It was just
like, ah, they're really going to lose four in a row. Like this is a pretty talented team.
They had six 20 plus plays. And if you like Seattle when Walker's healthy, which he was
today, and they can run the ball and then they're just getting an explosive play every
quarter. It's kind of-
This is the one you want to see. This is the Seahawks team you want to play every quarter. It's kind of where you want to see.
There's a Seahawks team you want to see, right?
And the Falcons team you want to see.
Like just go away.
Right. No pass rush.
Cousins was under attack for a lot of the game.
Gino, not quite an MVP candidate, but weirdly important for this season, I feel like.
He throws the ball. They throw all the time. I think he has 2,000 yards already.
Does he really?
Yeah, I think he does.
Is it that many?
Wow.
He's not up there in touchdowns, but I think he's close.
Yeah, 1985, he's right there.
Wow.
Wow, that's good.
Yeah, he threw some good balls.
And like you said, everyone contributed.
Noah Phant out of nowhere, just catching balls.
Yeah, they need Walker healthy to go far, I, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, with Tampa tomorrow. I feel like Atlanta could be one and six. And then I think the three teams today were minus 76.
Yeah.
Three NFC South teams heading into this Tampa ball time.
Yeah.
And you got Spencer Rattler and Andy Dalton.
Yeah.
The quarterback, two of them.
Yeah.
I don't, I don't think that division gets to 30 because Carolina is, do
they have one more win in them?
They're going to go two and 15 or one and 16.
And then New Orleans has lost five straight.
Are they a seven and 10 team?
Like six and 11.
Like.
They're going to be, uh, they're in danger getting crossed off next week.
Yeah.
Right.
So Tampa could maybe get to 10 or 11 wins.
And then that leaves us with Atlanta.
Yeah.
11.
I don't see it like Tampa would have to go like 13 and four for that division. Get to 30 with Atlanta. Yeah, 11, nine. I don't see it.
Like Tampa would have to go like 13 and four
for that division to get to third.
Right, yeah.
Yeah, you're not gonna get 10 wins out of Carolina
and New Orleans, I don't think.
The three shitty games today were Miami 16 to 10 over Indy.
I'm sorry, Indy 16 to 10 over Miami.
Indy is now four and three
and I have no idea how it happened and I have YouTube TV
and the multi view and I have no idea
how they're four and three.
We're going for first place, all alone in first place
if they beat the Texans next week.
The Rams are 20 and 15, nobody would start anyone
on their offense.
Right.
And then other than maybe Williams.
And then the Jags 32 to 16 over the Pats. And then, uh, other than maybe Williams and then the Jags 32 to 16
over the Pats. And then we had some blowouts. Um, I guess the only other thing
that happened was Daniel's got hurt immediately.
In the, uh, in the, in the Carolina game, which is, was one of the biggest fantasy
murders of the year, right?
You just, that's it, you have no chance.
You have been in a guillotine league so long, see you later.
Who do you have tomorrow night?
Ravens, Bucks, and Chargers, cards?
I have Bucks and I have the Chargers.
And I feel strong about them.
Really, you feel strong?
I think so, yeah.
I think the Bucks, I think there's a bad spot for Baltimore.
I know they beat every NFC team, but I really think the bucks, uh, I mean, they
have the worst past defense in the league.
And I think, uh, Baker's going to go nuts.
Baker's 15 touchdowns.
But I know that's crazy.
I love the chargers and I had a Ravens over adjusted parlay thingy that I kind
of like, I think the line's like a point too high. Yeah. It feels like a field goal game to me. Yeah. They got the NFL doesn't let you get on a roll too much.
Right.
The one thing we didn't talk about is the bet I didn't make.
Maybe you did the Barkley stuff.
Everyone was like, Oh my God, he's definitely scoring.
He's definitely going over 83 yards.
I'm like, all right, calm down.
There's 11 guys who are going to want to tackle him too.
You know, this grudge doesn't only go one way.
God, did he make me look stupid. And I'm like, I'm, calm down. There's 11 guys who are gonna wanna tackle him too. You know, this grudge doesn't only go one way.
God, did he make me look stupid and the Giants.
He scored, right?
I think he scored, yeah, he scored at least one.
Yeah, he scored one.
He had 176 yards rushing.
We looked at that and the odds weren't good
for million dollar picks.
I think we did a Hunter Henry one.
But it's also weird because it's like,
aha, I told you you should have signed me.
It's like, yeah, it would have been bad for everybody
if you signed with the Giants.
Let's do a little thing we like to call guess the lines.
Oh, I've heard about this.
Remember this thing?
What's the record?
Four, two, and one, you're winning?
Yeah, look at that.
You're winning four, two, and one.
Yeah, there you go.
Thursday night, Vikings ramps.
Tough spot for the Vikes, man.
That was like a pretty hard-hitting playoff game,
crazy, intense, and now four days later,
you gotta just turn it back on.
It's in LA. Are you going?
Kinda.
You going or you're not going?
Not going to that.
Am I going to this?
I couldn't stand Dodger Stadium.
So fine.
I wanted to kill somebody.
Yeah.
You kind of lived there too.
Did you see the parking for Dodger Stadium today?
How much was it? It was $60 when I went on Monday. What was it today? Oh, they jacked it today. It was like for any decent lot, it was 200 bucks.
Wow.
Yeah. And for the best lot, it was like 500 bucks.
Wow. What an asshole world we live in.
Yeah.
God almighty. Yeah.
They're like 200 bucks or sit in in traffic for 100 minutes after the game.
Yeah, it's true.
They know they have you.
They have you.
You're going to leave early or you're going to spend two and a half
hours in this parking lot.
With, with your eight year old kid who needs to pee and is super upset and
ate too much sugar and is, is having to melt down in the back seat.
Yeah.
Or avoid hours and you can get out.
Avoid shady guys who are trying to sign knockoff Otani t-shirts.
Thanks. I have nowhere to go, but thanks.
I have Vikings minus three against the Rams in LA.
We both get it and we got it exactly right.
Oh, okay.
Did McVeigh, he might've played his cards right.
Like he rested, he rested Nakua and,
cause he knew he had this Thursday coming, right?
So he rested both those guys and they should be back.
Cooper, Kup, and Nakua.
Try to sneak it out.
Smart move.
Yeah, it worked.
This feels like a stay away game to me.
Sure, I mean they're all, almost all of them are.
That guy, that guy verse on the Rams.
Yeah, that's my guy.
What were the defensive player odds for him?
Didn't you recommend that?
I bet it.
It was high, right?
It was like over, it was double digits.
It was like 10 to one, 12 to one, 14 to one.
I have 100 to win, 950.
No, no, plus 950.
Plus 950.
Yeah.
Well, I think he's in the running.
He was really good in the Raiders game today.
Okay, Sunday Marquis.
Controversial, we don't usually do it this way
because this isn't the quote unquote best game.
And I'm not even positive one of the quarterbacks
is gonna be playing in this game.
But if he is, no, Washington, Chicago.
At Washington.
So what do you want to do with this?
Because the line suggests pretty strongly
one way or another if he's playing.
So I don't know if you want to throw this out
or do you want to?
What is out with the injury?
What do we know?
Nothing?
Ribs and being evaluated tomorrow.
I think we throw it out.
Okay.
I would have guessed, assuming Daniels was playing,
I would have guessed Washington by three.
That's exactly right, so it doesn't matter,
because that's what I had too,
and it's Chicago one and a half.
So it seems like they don't think he's playing.
But I didn't mind, Mary, I don't, I don't know.
He was okay.
Was there a Jaden Daniels won't get out of October bet?
Oh no.
I don't know if that was the big fair with him, right?
I think we even talk.
I mean, he's 140 pounds.
I know he's got to cover those ribs with something.
By the way, they flexed that game, didn't they?
Wasn't that like a 1 PM kickoff?
They flexed it to 4 PM like last week. And now, yeah, now it's a. With something by the way, they flex that game, didn't they? Wasn't that like a 1 PM kickoff?
They flexed it to 4 PM like last week.
And now, yeah, now it's a, yeah, they moved.
They might've moved your guys up.
Jets Patriots was four and now it's back at one.
They did maybe shoot it earlier.
Yeah.
Started at seven in the morning.
Watchable Cincinnati home for Philadelphia.
I have since he by two and a half.
You got it exactly.
What is it?
I thought that was high.
It's two and a half.
I said one, so.
And then.
Why is three and four almost a field goal over four and two?
It's just power ratings at this point. Are they two and five or three and four, almost a field goal over four and two. It's just power ratings at this point.
Are they two and five or three and four?
Three and four.
Yeah, three and four.
Yeah.
All the ranking stuff likes the Bengals.
I think that's why.
You talk about two teams I don't trust that everyone wants
to talk about in the playoffs.
I promise I will not bet on this game.
Yeah, if you see this on Million Dollar Picks,
you have to assume I'm now hooked on
codeine with like
Vicodin attached to it. I'm definitely on
like hardcore drugs at that point.
That's what I'm moving for now.
The Bengals buy us two and a half.
I might be able to have like a codeine IV.
Here's the other one.
Buffalo at Seattle.
This is just a good game.
This would have been the marquee game if it wasn't the two Ricky quarterbacks going against each other.
I can't wait to watch this.
I think I nailed this.
Bills by one and a half at Seattle.
Yeah, I mean, this is one, you know, if I think about it for 10, 15 seconds and I don't get it, I go to my favorite one and a half.
So we bolted one and a half.
It's three bills by three.
Wow.
Now do me a favor.
Will you do me a favor?
If the bills go down like 10, nothing, will you and Hensch not text me?
Like I told you the bills to win the division was a little sketchy.
Like we, we made a parlay with the bills, Houston, Kansas city and Baltimore to all when the division's about even odds.
You could still get it about even odds.
The bill they're fine.
They're going to take time.
If they need to win their last five, they'll do that.
They're great.
You know what I realized?
Cause I did my NBA super boost this year, which I've hit the last two years in a
row and I've also hit the last two NFL ones.
And I was like, what was the NFL super boost we did this year?
I forgot to do one.
Cause Fandl had that parlay booster thing.
We never actually did a super boost.
Really?
I don't think we ever actually did one.
I, we, they're given so many names, token boosts and this and that.
Yeah, they were doing those parlay tokens. They're giving us so many names. Token boosts and this and that.
Yeah, they were doing those parlay tokens.
They were throwing tokens at us.
Yeah, yeah.
And I think we would have done Detroit over.
I think we would have done Green Bay over.
Yeah.
And then I would have insisted on the Pat's Under.
Although they don't love necessarily doing the Unders
with the parlay boosts.
But I think it would have been something like that.
Let's ask if we could do that now.
We wanna do a week eight super boost token.
Super token.
Congratulations reward.
Yeah.
Yeah, I was really mad we didn't do that.
Anyway, let's take one more break and then we'll do the rest of Guest Alliance.
Fairly Watchables.
I got four Fairly Watchables and I have six poop Fectas.
Oh, Sarutti reminds us. We did do a Super Boost.
What was it, Sarutti? What did we do?
Denver over with Seattle over.
Oh no.
Was our Super Boost.
Oh, that's going to be good.
We're going to hit that. Denver over was like was like wasn't it like six and a half wins
Yeah, and Seattle's over was eight and a half wins and yes Denver was five and a half
Thanks, Saruti and then Seattle. I think was eight and a half and Denver has Carolina this week. Oh, man We're gonna be so close right away
Super boost baby Kings of the super boost
I'm gonna do my own voice doing the Superboost.
Oh, you're so good at the Superboost.
Oh, yes, Sarudy says he bet it.
I got the Sudafed Superboost of the day.
It's the special knack one with Cody and Superboost.
Four fairly watchables.
Packers Jags.
It's both watchable and will be a train wreck.
Coach, middle seat. Going against, with feeling good after beating Jared Mayo and the New England
Patriots. He's back, baby. And now he's playing the Packers, the team with a really good defense.
And they're going to be home. And I think Green Bay is going to be favored by two and a half.
All right.
I said four, it's four and a half.
Oh, I'm going to get that.
Yeah.
They've, they've had enough for Jacksonville.
I think they know.
Plus this is a pretty good coach against a not so great traveling coach.
You see, well, he's got one win in in the in the United States, right? Yeah, that's true
Yeah, okay, it's gonna hang himself with a seatbelt extender
But no, but maybe it's cuz these games are on early in the morning and I know the Pats are involved
And I was mad at how poorly coach who were
But they're showing the Jags on the sidelines like smiling, excited near the end that they want to,
made me upset.
I'm sorry.
I was in my glasses on my cold medication.
I'm like, fuck you Trevor Lawrence.
I'm mad at him.
How dare you laugh at the end of this game?
Damn.
They're coming home.
Oh, Bucks Falcons.
I know where you're going to bet this one.
This, I already see this.
What's your wise wager this year?
You're like five and two, right?
Five and two.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I think I could see you grabbing the Bucks here.
I might.
It's in Tampa and I'm going to say Bucks by two.
Do we split this?
Yeah, I have three.
It's two and a half.
Okay. Can I tell you, this is one of the, you know how I get depressed about, forget Um, do we split this? Yeah, I have three. It's two and a half.
Okay.
Can I tell you, this is one of the, you know, how I get depressed about, uh,
forget about the Mets and the Cowboys and everything else, but this time of year, there's different times of the year where, oh no, football's almost over.
This is the first week where teams have already played each other.
So we saw the bucks.
That makes you sad?
It does.
Yeah.
Cause it makes me think, oh man, now everybody everybody's gonna start having played each other twice in their divisions
This was 36 30 a couple weeks ago on that Thursday night that crazy game that cousins threw for 500
Well, maybe if you start feeling sad there also be happiness as the Dodgers are beating the hell out of the Yankees and we watch
He's lose and you could be like well, we lost to the eventual World Series champions, which is always really comforting.
Yeah, second place, a true second place.
And not to put more pressure on the Dodgers,
but nobody counts the 2020 title.
Like I know you have a banner, I know you're excited
about it, but it was the 60 game season.
People are opting out, there are no fans, like come on.
That was about as fake of a title as anyone's won.
So time to win a real one, guys. Was Turner jumping in the team photo right after, right.
And he had COVID and everyone freaked out and was like, Oh no, that was a
bigger story than the non parade.
I don't even remember who was in that playoffs.
Texans Colts it's in Houston.
It's an AFC South battle.
I don't know how much you saw Richardson today, but, um, yeah, he Oh, be nice. I had him on. I had him on winning weekend.
He's not accurate.
Oh, he's not accurate.
Very nice guy.
Talked about Dairy Queen for a while.
Uh, yeah, I'm sure he's a nice guy.
Um, his passes just kind of go all over the place. We talked about Dairy Queen for a while. Yeah. He wasn't. I'm sure he's a nice guy.
His passes just kind of go all over the place.
And the other thing that's interesting is
they don't use him like the Cam Newton battering ram anymore
because I think they're afraid he's gonna get hurt.
So if you're not gonna play him,
like unleash this maniac athlete,
but now you have like kind of an inaccurate pocket passer.
I'm not sure that's the best use of him.
Yeah, he was the one I love point now,
which halftime of the one PM Eastern game quarterbacks is doing.
You can always find someone like 30 yards.
I think he had like 41 and a half.
And that's probably why our friend JJ almost ran into traffic because they
couldn't beat the Colts, but he ran for 56 yards.
I mean, he was a leading rusher.
I don't know.
They didn't have to do much to beat the Stalphans today.
You know why JJ didn't run into traffic?
Because we beat the Guardians and we beat the Royals.
We're in the World Series.
Next time I run into traffic, bro, it'll be the parade in Bronx.
And I'll be on a float with Soto.
He should've gone in traffic and asked if anyone
on the street could name four guardians.
Can you name four guardians?
And not of the galaxy.
We're talking the baseball team.
Texans minus four over the Colts, I have. I said four also, it's five and a half. Okay. And that also is a rematch from week one, 29-27, Texans.
Yeah.
Chiefs at Raiders.
There's a little backstory.
Didn't somebody in the Raiders talk shit
about Mahomes for the season?
Oh yeah, who was that?
Some doofus on the defense.
Doesn't sound right.
That's what happened.
I don't know.
I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. that? Some doofus on the defense.
Doesn't sound right.
That's what happened.
So you gotta factor in with this line.
The Chiefs could easily be up like nine with two minutes left
and Pierce could be like, we'll take the field goal.
Oh yeah.
Now we're down six.
Yeah, the Pierce effect.
This looks better in the newspaper.
I have Chiefs by seven in Vegas.
You know, I said seven also.
Ten.
Ten is the number.
Oh, that's the first true shocker of the year.
That's a good one.
Ten in Vegas.
I think, well, there's a little payback, right?
Cause this is, they beat them on Christmas.
So they're not gonna be overlooked.
Or Vegas isn't afraid of them
cause they beat them last year.
Right. That line seems too high.
I went to this game three years ago.
I'm gonna talk myself into them now.
Well, but I went to this game three years ago in Las Vegas.
Ton of red, ton of red.
So much red there.
I don't know.
I don't know what kind of advantage the Raiders have, but you're right.
So there could, there could be a piercing.
Should we call that like a ball piercing or something?
When you get screwed on the spread because kicks a field goal.
You think any of his coaches was like, yo coach, we're still going to need a
touchdown if we kick this field goal.
And you're giving up all this field position.
Maybe try to get a pass interference or something.
Anything.
Coach, that's four minutes in the fourth quarter.
You know that, right?
That's not third quarter.
That's a four.
Coach, it's the second half.
It's not preseason.
Coach, it's three hours into the game, coach.
Don't be soft, we're kicking a field goal.
We're cutting it at five, one stop.
All that we have to do is go 90 yards to get a touchdown instead of just going nine.
Oh man.
10 points.
You know, I was worried that at some point as I got older that the coaching would get
smarter and there would be less stuff to make fun of. And it's just not true every year.
Every week dumb shit happens.
Like Doug Peterson could just go up by 18 with 10 minutes left.
He's like, nope, fourth of two.
Let's go.
Let's do this.
I guarantee ex-coaches or maybe current coaches, who knows, listen to us.
Maybe.
It's got to be some.
And they must think we're assholes.
But there's 50 bad decisions a day.
And if we paid attention, there'd be 150.
What gives?
There's a whole aspect of a game
that you and I can coach better than these guys,
most of them.
My friend Hershey, we were talking about quarterbacks,
and he's around our age,
and he's talking about the conundrum of
Daniel Jones, where like some giants fans are like, ah, Daniel Jones, he can do
this, he can do that.
And he's like, I've been watching football my entire life since I was a
little kid.
I've been watching quarterbacks week in, week out since the mid seventies.
I feel like I know if a quarterback has it or not at this point.
It's not one of those talk yourself into it.
Maybe it's like, you kind of know where you don't know if a guy has it.
And it's like, I have five decades of experience now watching the signs for
whether somebody has it or not and he doesn't have it.
And I was like, it's a great way to put it.
Yeah.
Cause in some ways we're, we're getting slower and dumber as we get older.
But in other ways, like we've watched so much sports. You kind of, you have the veteran experience
of just putting our 10 million hours in watching games.
Like riding a bike.
I see a pothole, I'm gonna go to the left of it.
Yeah.
I mean, just what are you supposed to do?
Now there's some politics involved,
like Stefanski, I don't wanna fully blame him
for this situation because it just cannot be possible now that he wants to star Watson and nobody
else. Now it doesn't matter. But the poop factor jets at Pats. So the jet somehow
get to play the Pats twice in the first half of the season. One of the two worst teams in the league.
And I think this is Jets by six and a half.
Oh, you dirtbag.
I said seven is six and a half.
What is the score here?
That is a teaser.
You're up seven, six.
Could be a hard week of practices for the Pats.
Got to get tougher.
You think so?
I mean, you might just remain soft.
Mayo just took over the team.
He's got to make this team tough.
Oh no, he's been here the whole season.
Yeah.
Um, well, what was it? 24 three on that Thursday night?
Yeah, but that was with Berset.
Right, right.
May's good.
They have something with May.
Now it's like, how do you build around this asset
and do you have the right coach and the right front office
to pick the right people
to put around a genuine asset?
And do all of your receivers have agents?
This is a catastrophe.
Because this is so hard to find a quarterback who's actually good.
A young quarterback who's actually talented and can move and has a good arm.
Like they have the quarterback.
Who's the best quarterback, new quarterback on a team that's not very good.
And he's been there for three years.
Trevor Lawrence.
I guess so.
That's like your worst case scenario, right? But they wanted the vision though.
Is there anyone hanging as like nine and eight?
Even the Chargers, I would say.
Herbert?
Yeah.
I'm sticking to him as the example, but.
Drake Mays good.
Lions are home for the Titans.
And I think this is what you're alluding to at the start of the podcast
about how we have some old school Lions.
At first I instinctively put down like Lions minus nine.
I was like, wait a second, they're gonna jack this up.
And I just kept, and I went all the way to 13.
I have Lions by 13.
All right, I get you here.
I went a little high.
I said 11 and a half, it's 10 and a half.
Oh.
Right, let me see, maybe they moved I said 11 and a half. It's 10 and a half. Oh, right. Let me say maybe they moved it. 10 and a half.
It's too low. It's too low.
I mean, that's an automatic,
automatic three team 10 point teaser.
Well, I was going to say we should invite an old,
an old friend into our life and there's another one we haven't hit yet, but I think we have two so far.
I think you're thinking lions over Titans and you're thinking chiefs over Raiders.
I'm afraid of that chiefs game.
Oh really?
Yeah, I'm afraid of that one.
I would probably do the Jets as the second one.
Well, they're going to lose to the Pats and go two and six.
But they should just lead the team.
It's so much fun rooting against them though.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
We'll find two teams.
But this is a free 10 points to use on a normal team.
The Titans stink.
This is our super bet boost.
10 point totem pole boost.
Our 10 point Neckl Codem boost.
Dolphins home for the Cardinals.
A truly awful game.
Really bad.
Well, hold on though.
This is, is this the one?
Cause our buddy JJ was screaming about how two was coming back.
You think he's back for this?
I don't know.
Well, I'm going to pick the Dolphins by one and a half
over the Cardinals at home regardless.
Targeting the gate.
Whether he comes back or not.
I said two and a half, it's three.
No, maybe he's coming back.
Are you beating me right now?
Oh, one, two, three.
Eight, two.
Yeah.
Wow, I went on a run here.
Fuck.
What am I doing?
Eight to seven.
Eight to seven.
Yep.
All right.
Ravens at Cleveland.
This is always fun.
No, no, if you know this, Sal,
but the Browns moved to Baltimore and became the Ravens.
What?
Was there like a van?
Don't tell me it was in the- Long time ago, yeah.
No, a long time ago.
Was it in the middle of the night?
At least they had a decency to do it during the day, right?
Yeah. I have the Ravens by three and a half. I feel
good about this one. Wait a minute. This is your biggest swing and miss of the
year. Ravens at Cleveland? The Baltimore Ravens. At Cleveland? I got Ravens three and a half. What is it?
It's nine and a half.
In Cleveland?
Yeah, in Cleveland, where they lose all their games, a team that hasn't gone over
their point total all year.
That is that's my that's by far my worst.
Well, I told you I'm on drugs.
That's it. Yeah, the drugs are killing you.
I had not. Wait, that line's way too high.
The Browns have a pretty good defense.
What do you watch the game? Or I know, that line's way too high. The Browns have a pretty good defense. Do you watch the game today?
They don't score.
I know, but they don't ever score.
It's important in these games.
Nine and a half's a lot.
Plus they have a whole week with their new,
I mean, just not having Watson's worth seven points.
Yeah, and it is a short week for the Ravens.
Nick Chubb?
My guy?
Right.
I had Nick Chubb.
I have him on all my fantasy teams.
You kept him?
And each week, like a little baby bird, I gave him little seeds, and I have him on all my fantasy teams. You kept him?
And each week, like a little baby bird, I just, I gave him little seeds and I poured
water in his head and I tried to grow him back to life on all my teams.
Didn't wave him.
Just kept him on.
Hogged the spot, just waiting for my guy.
My favorite fantasy player.
He's back.
This will be the week.
It's Nick Chubb week next week.
He doesn't want to be back.
We just crossed his team off.
No, he's back. He's doing it to be back. We just crossed his team off now. He's back
He's doing it for the love of the game. Yeah
I think there's
Well, they they don't want to get killed on teasers, right?
Because everyone's teasing everybody who plays the Browns like the Bengals was easy
Even though they covered the Browns, but Bengals on a teaser
I started I had a must-win in our knockout league because I snuck out a win last week But I had wide receivers at cup and DJ more weren't playing so I'm scrambling for a waiver wire guys
And I started Jerry Judy
Who you know they traded Amari Cooper. I'm like all right Judy and
He had no points like halfway through the fourth quarter, and then he finally caught like an 18 yarder
But I need to say you'll be seeing Jerry
on the waiver wire on Wednesday night.
You're gonna beat me.
You're gonna win two in a row here.
You're a 71% favorite against me.
You're up eight, you're a Baker.
What's my win probability?
Is that my win probability?
71%.
This is the one place I kind of rely on it
more than anything.
With these dumb fantasy games, I don't even look at the score, but yeah, 71 to 29.
That's a win probability.
Chargers home for the Saints.
Saints trying to lose six in a row.
I have the Chargers favored by three and a half.
Where is this game?
Wow.
Billy, boy.
I said six.
It's seven and a half.
All right.
What is going on?
Well, I think you said it.
You're on drugs.
Why are the Chargers favored by over a touchdown against anybody?
I like the Chargers, but I mean, they scored 20 points a game.
The Saints were so bad.
Like you should
Take it off your phone if you like the Saints after that performance that was so bad. I'm falling apart
Well, I probably hit this next one because it's Broncos home for
Carolina a team that has to get at least nine points or higher against any team. They play at Broncos by nine and a half.
You are closer, but, uh, yeah, it's seven and a half. I said four and a half.
So you get that.
So is that your, what's the three team teaser?
You don't trust, you don't trust Bo Nick yet.
No, I don't.
You saw that overthrow under throw pass.
You loved it.
I think you tweeted about it.
It was terrific.
I've never seen anything like it.
It's beautiful.
Then the two guys like commiserated over it.
Like, yeah.
It's just, yeah.
Yeah, they quit the team.
They turned in their jerseys.
I thought he was pretty good in that game though.
He really has flashes.
Yeah, again, I don't know what that,
that Saints team was just a mess
and Peyton had that circled for years. So Sunday night, 49ers Cowboys.
Oh, Mike. Oh, this is why we do it. Mike. Are you kidding me?
I thought Brady in the second half of that Niners game sounded like if
Shanahan caught up to the booth and said, could you start next week? He was
ready to do it.
He was like genuinely disappointed by Purdy.
Yeah.
Interesting.
What could he do?
So if he, could he, could he do all these things?
Could he announce and own part of the Raiders and be quarterback of the 49ers?
What else could he do?
Could he play the big Dom role for a team also?
How many, how many. Could he play Silvio in role for a team also? How many different hats could he wear?
Could he play Silvio in a Sopranos remake?
I would love that.
Yeah.
That'd be great.
Brady at the Bing.
I hate this game.
I hate it.
I have 49ers by two and a half.
Oh, wow. I thought you'd go higher and beat me. I said three and a half and it's five and a half.
Good luck.
That's too many points.
This is kind of who needs this more?
The Niners, right?
I mean, I think your team needs every game.
You're gonna need 10 wins to make playoffs, both of them.
I think both of them need it equally.
Gotta get to 10 wins.
Now it's a wild card battle for these two, probably.
And shit, if Chicago gets to play Marriota instead of Jayden Daniels, they could be five
and two.
Yeah.
Like Chicago might get to 10 wins.
I think 10 wins is the cutoff for the NFC.
It's going to frustrate me.
I don't want to look at, but I, and something tells me the bears haven't played the best
of quarterbacks in their runs.
You know, you're right. Monday night, speaking of not the best of quarterbacks,
Steelers, uh, home for the giants.
And we didn't really talk about the Russell Saenz that much, but, uh, he,
he did get it going as the game went along.
I have Steelers by six and a half at home against the giants.
I said three and a half, so I'm going to get it.
It is four and a half.
Wow, what a demolition.
I'm going to have to drug you with the encoding.
Maybe you found a new secret.
Just infect me.
Yeah.
Listen, those lines made no sense.
Why wouldn't the Steelers be favored by seven?
The Giants suck.
The Giants are awful.
We're going to make some money this week.
There are some glaring errors here. And one of the errors is... The Steelers and the, the 10 point tease would be good because you could take them to plus five and a half.
Oh yeah.
You're right.
That defends it.
Raheem too is a bonus.
Yeah.
Raheem hates teasing it over the zero.
It's like his least favorite thing other than if you don't get a burner hotel room.
He's going to Vegas this week too.
Can I just tell you, I had a great time watching with the Ringer staff today.
Yeah, let's hear about it.
We did the pregame show and then Spotify has this great movie theater.
It's basically a theater, right?
So you have a movie screen.
100 seat theater.
Right.
You have 100 seats and they had, and our producer Jack had another like 50 inch screen, um, to the
side of it.
So now we have to figure out, well, let me ask you, let me figure out how would you do
the games?
We got that giant projection screen and then we have a multi-inch one.
Okay.
Yes.
Yeah.
We got access to everything.
So how would you do it?
I hope you didn't put the dolphins as one of the four games.
Well, cause JJ, he'd bullied you into that?
The Dolphins were on the smaller TV, not on the big screen. So the bigger had a four.
Because we had Lions, Vikings, Packers, Texans. Yeah.
And then it was kind of all the other games. Seahawks Falcons was good.
Oh, Seahawks Falcons, that was a good one. Yeah. And then the fourth one was dependent on whatever
you cared about.
All right, now I love all these guys,
but guess what most of them were screaming for
on the big screen?
What?
The red zone and only the red zone.
And I'm like, no, no, no, no, no, no.
I'm like, we got a giant, giant screen
that we're never gonna see the size of the screen again.
We have to put a four box on that.
And they're like, okay, we'll put a red zone on the 50.
I'm like, no, let's watch all the games.
And I promise you'll know when a team's close to scoring by the yard line,
by watching all the games that went. Yeah. But then they're like, Oh,
we got to hear Scott Hans. We got it. I don't want to hear. I was like, Oh my God.
So I won the, I was going to go home. I was going to, I was very upset, but, uh,
but I think we all had a good time.
But the red zone, the time. But this red zone. So it's a generational thing.
The youngers love the red zone.
They love the red zone.
I knew it, but I didn't think like,
given a, you know, we can watch Casablanca on that thing.
Yeah, yeah, Scott Hanson.
So how was it on the giant movie screen?
It was great.
It's ridiculous.
I recommend everyone come by next Sunday.
I wanna do it again. It was ridiculous. I recommend everyone come by next Sunday. I want to do it again.
It was fun.
Nothing like downtown LA on a Sunday morning.
We had pizza.
I'm on the Atkins, so I ordered a Calzone.
I dug out all the protein.
It was beautiful.
You're on the Atkins again?
Yeah, because I'm a fat piece of shit.
When did that start?
Because of the Mets?
I haven't had a carb since Monday.
No, because here's what Melissa puts out the candy bowl for Halloween, October
1st, and I don't even like candy corn.
I'm doing like fist after handful, you know, and I was like, I gotta just not eat carbs
till Thanksgiving.
So let's see what happens.
It's a long way.
Do you want to hear about the WNBA finals?
Yeah, I did have it on the third screen, but it looked like a lot of
poor play, but there was officiating was just as bad.
Well, let me ask you the, the final number was a 25 to eight free throw
advantage for the Liberty.
That seemed a little high idea with both teams playing physical and driving in
the basket. It seems a little high to you with both teams playing physical and driving in the basket. Seems a little out of whack.
Home team.
End of the game.
Jones, who won finals MVP and should have because she was great the whole series.
Leslie Jones?
Oh, it's a different Jones.
No, JJ.
JJ, their center.
The other JJ.
Just bowled somebody over and they called the defensive foul.
It was awful.
Like the announcers, they know what to do.
Collier comes the other way.
They have the ball up to 26 seconds left, the links.
Like if they score, the game's over.
And we bet the links, we should tell people.
We have the links for the series, five to one.
And I also really liked Collier and I was really into it.
And Collier comes driving down,
just misses a layup and gets hacked and is immediately yelling at the refs
and she doesn't yell at the refs,
they won't replay it, no replays at all.
Then it comes back down to Brianna Stewart
who gets the ball, travels,
and then kind of crashes into somebody
and throws a shot up, minimal contact.
This is a game where people are just mauling each other
the whole game.
Collier's getting just killed.
And they call it, they challenge,
because there wasn't a foul,
and they're like, she wasn't in the correct guarding position.
Two shots!
And all of a sudden, Stewie's shooting two shots.
They get it, goes to OT, and they foul Collier out.
And it was just like
It was like it was like David Stern era WNBA shit. Yeah, it's ridiculous They won they won the championship. They shot 30% they missed every three and
And what was Sabrina? She was one for 19 and they won the title. The two best were what were they?
What were they like five for 33 or something?
They were two for 23 from three and they shot 30%.
And so the Lynx were bitching about the officiating after and they should have because it was outrageous.
Right.
I thought the Lynx had a better team.
Unlike the NLCS, many of those games were close and exciting.
I'll give them that.
It was great for the week.
They should have had this game on a...
This game should have been on a Monday night.
And you know, it's the last...
They had to fuck up the schedule until the bitter end
and they decided to go on a Sunday night
against Jets, Steelers, and Dodgers, Mets, Game 6.
So stupid.
Just like go to Monday against NFL.
I guess there's two NFL games.
Well, by the way, that Sunday afternoon slate
would have been fine too.
Well, I mean, I know you're going against Chiefs Niners,
but that was the only good game.
Yeah, yeah.
Well, I'm looking, you know, five for 42 from three,
that should get you, that should get your juices going
for the NBA playoffs.
No, nothing else.
Well, I was thinking, I was like, this is,
this is the NBA playoffs.
Nobody can make a shot.
The coaching's terrible.
And the officiating is completely one-sided.
They've done it. They've come up with their own league.
It's a clone.
I will never understand for the life of me, Minnesota, Collier was 11 for 23.
I will never understand for the life of me why they didn't put her at the top of the key
and just have her beat people off the dribble.
Every time they did that, she got to the basket.
And they were like posting her up so the Liberty could double her.
I was like, what are you guys doing?
Just clear out for her.
She goes by everybody.
But I thought she was the best player in the series.
But she wasn't in proper guarding position.
That's the problem.
Oh my God.
Well, the other thing is Smith got hurt in game three because Jones bowled
her over and then same thing happened in game five and she came out for a while, but she
was pretty banged up. I think if she was healthy, we win the bet. It was a great bet. We didn't
hedge it at halftime.
Yeah, I know. We had the right one.
Another great non-hedge for us. But there you go. really good at wmba season though and by the way all do or die
games are terrible like go back and look at 2016 nba warriors cleveland like that's a fucking rock
fight 2010 celtics lakers rock fight 2005 spurs pistons rock fight why when you get to that level
it's a rock fight because it's too tense it level, it's a rock fight. Because it's too tense. It's like too much pressure.
And the teams don't know each other too well.
It's like the baseball, their arms are too taxed
at this point.
That's why his velocity is down four miles an hour
from when it was Monday.
Yeah, maybe.
Is that kind of it?
I don't know.
I don't know, too tense.
Today's parent corner is brought to you by Workday.
Get the whole band together with Workday,
Pear, Finance, and HR on one platform for an epic performance. by Workday. Get the whole band together with Workday, pair finance and HR on one platform
for an epic performance.
With Workday AI at the core,
you'll make confident decisions faster than ever,
and you'll drive flawless business finance operations
with an agile platform that constantly evolves
to future-proof your organization.
Be a finance and HR rockstar with Workday.
Visit Workday.com to learn more. What do you got for us?
All right. So I had the kids this weekend and Harrison had a tournament Saturday,
a baseball tournament. Because Melissa was away, she was in New York. She had like a very serious
thing. She had to get drunk with our sister-in-law all weekend. So that was, so she was off the grid. She wasn't here. And then, um, so Harrison has
games on Saturday, uh, in that now I forgot, I told you where we were. Where the hell was I?
Thought it was like in Sino or somewhere. No, no, no, no. Oh, San Clemente. San Clemente.
Yeah. Great place for a tournament. I like San Clemente. Really good. It was nice. The weather's good and everything else.
He's got a game at 6 p.m. and a game at 8 p.m.
So they're done at 10, 15, and we're driving home and it's going to be 11, 30,
and then I've got to wake up for football and everything,
the London game and everything. So I'm already a little tense about that.
So we get in the car, we get there. For the six o'clock game, he's got to be there at 5.
We're in the car at 3.30. We get there and he gets out and he's like, oh no.
It's like, I left my cleats at home.
He's wearing Crocs.
I said, what are you talking about?
He's like, I left my cleats at home.
Now for baseball, you could pretty much leave everything
except your cleats.
Like you could borrow the kid who's sitting on the bench
his glove and his hat or something else.
The cleats, they're no good.
You know, they're not, you know.
So I was like, I don't know what to do here.
The game set and he's pitching.
He's starting the game.
I was like, all right, I'm gonna drop you a practice
and then I'm gonna go find cleats.
Hopefully I could do this.
It's five o'clock on a Saturday.
So you're Googling, you're doing ways.
You're doing big five and decks and everything.
Exactly what I'm doing.
Sporting goods and in the area and San Clemente.
And I come across Walmart and I look at the website and they have cleats.
They have kids cleats and everything.
I'm like, all right, that's good.
That's a 1.5 miles away.
I drive away from his practice.
I go to Walmart.
It's gigantic.
And I'm looking and I'm looking, I'm looking.
Finally I ask someone for help and I'm like,
hey, do you have a boys cleats?
Like, we don't sell cleats here.
And I'm like, do I, okay, what do I do?
Do I yell at, did I scream at this guy?
Do I throw a punt?
What do I do?
Or do I show them the website?
I'm not sure what to do.
Where do I just get the hell out of here
and try to find them?
I like to complete the stain for customer questions.
Yeah, exactly.
Cleats? Are you fucking morons? We don't sell cleats here in Walmart. Yeah, exactly. Little cleats. You fucking moron.
You don't sell cleats here.
You have zillion shoes.
Walmart.
Everything else.
You have shin guards.
You sell Cheetos.
Yeah.
So I just leave.
I was proud of myself for just leaving it, so now I have to go to the big five, six and
a half miles away.
So now I'm going to cut it close because I have to go there and back.
I get there and I'm like, this little fucker, I'm going to get him the pinkest cleats that I could find.
I'm going to get him these girl.
I just.
Peach cleats.
Yes, exactly.
It's going to be frilly.
Peach and raquas.
Everything.
Oh yeah, it's going to be bedazzled.
Everything.
They don't have it.
They have one pair of cleats and it's one size too big.
And I'm like, we just got to get it.
I got to get it. Size six. Buy the next pair of socks. That's the dad's way. Second pair of socks to fill the cleats and it's one size too big and I'm like, you just gotta get it. I gotta get it.
So I next pair of socks.
That's the dad's man.
Yeah.
I compare the socks to fill the pizza.
I let him, I didn't, you know what?
I didn't even think about that.
Had I, I might've just passed on it.
I was like, I just, I'm going to give it to him here.
So he gets the size sevens.
I bring them to him.
I get there like five 56, the coach is going nuts cause he might
have to reshuffle the lineup.
Can Harrison even pitch and Crocs? No way. way. He goes out there, he puts them on,
they're big, he looks like a dope. He throws two innings to shut out ball, he strikes out five kids.
Wow.
And now it's like, you see, now you see.
Magic Leeds.
That's exactly what it was. He's like, you got the magic Leeds. I was like, I am not ready to joke
about this, probably for three weeks. So let's revisit this sometime in November.
But the big story, that was the end of the story,
but it's like, I don't know what my parents would have done.
I think they just would have been like, you're on your own.
I really do.
I don't know.
Your dad probably is like, oh, sorry.
You're gonna have to pitch in Crocs
and you'll learn a valuable lesson.
Exactly.
As you let down your team.
You're going barefoot and you're walking home
from San Clemente that would be it
Yeah, all right, so I have some follow-up thoughts
first of all a great idea for a small sports star would be called you fucked up and
Just so cleats t-shirts cups. I love it
It's a oh thank God God there's a you fucked up
three and a half miles away, I'm gonna run over there.
Didn't you have a similar thing for spouses,
like we got your sunglasses or something?
I forgot.
Sunglasses, purses, suntan lotion.
Yeah, definitely.
Here's the other thing now.
Listen, we've been friends for a long time.
I don't mean to throw you into the bus,
but it is the parent's job to be,
do we have everything before we go.
Really?
I guess I should have noticed.
It's dope walking around in crocs.
Your son's not a rocket scientist yet.
He's 10 years old.
That's our, I remember leaving with Zoe,
because we had a similar thing where,
so we would always, I forget what she left behind,
but it was always like, all Do we have everything quits?
the Jersey
Water bottle we had like the five things and we would just go through the five things like like like she was Boris Gump
And that's how we did it before we leave but they get mad they get to talk about indignant like yeah
I'm not in there like four. Yeah, yeah, 14. It becomes insulting right. Yeah, at 14 it becomes insulting. Right, all right, I'll follow up.
Maybe you're right.
I should say I took my son to a lacrosse tournament
this weekend and it was black shorts.
And we're like, do we have everything?
Bah, bah, bah, and we go in the first game
and he's the only kid on his team
wearing a black jersey with white shorts.
So after the game I was like, Ben, where are the black shorts?
And he's like, oh yeah, we don't need those.
I'm like, you definitely, you're the only don't need those. I'm like, you definitely,
you were the only kid with white shorts.
I'm pretty sure you needed them.
My parent corner, I took my son yesterday
and then my wife took over for the championship stuff today.
But she had this tournament and it was in Santa Barbara,
La Crosse tournament at the polo club.
So, you know, we have these tournaments, baseball, soccer, whatever they're, they're, oh, it always sucks.
You're always in some crappy part of, uh, of some town.
You're not near anything.
It's just a bunch of fields.
It's really hard to park.
They, if there's food there, it's probably like one hot dog truck,
or maybe there's somebody selling like a couple of Gatorades.
It's the lowest possible end of lucking out with food, drink, anything.
And then if you have like the big tournaments,
they might have something in the middle where it's like they'll sell t-shirts and
jerseys and then they'll have like a churro place.
And so this Polo place was like fucking nice.
They had like cocktails. There was like a bar. They were making quesadillas. They're making,
there's like a quesadilla slash taco bar and they had like a sandwich place and there was like a
coffee and smoothies place but there was
like a legitimate bar and it's between games. Is anyone watching the games? Well because you have like
time to kill between the games right and it's 20 it's outdoors so between like he
had a game there was like a 45 minute break and I wanted to get like some
water and I went over and I decided to get at the bar because they had sparkling water, I wanted sparkling water.
And these ladies that were there,
they were ordering fucking margaritas.
Yeah, oh yeah.
And they're kind of decked out.
I'm like, is this, this feels like the beginning
of a Netflix rom-com, like these parents meeting
at some lacrosse tournament at the Polo place.
But these parents are fucking,
like having like real cocktails,
like getting it on.
Oh yeah.
At these lacrosse tournament,
I was like, wow, California never disappoints.
They figure it out because you only have 45 minutes,
but some of these parents,
if there's like two hours between games,
it's a slosh city.
So that's one thing I'm pretty sure we don't need at sports tournaments are parents with
a few drinks in them when there's kids in officials.
They're sure that's a bad idea, but I'm not, I won't judge.
Then the other thing, and this is, this is, I'm glad I'm here for this.
These people that bring dogs to tournaments. I don't know if this is on the
agenda with Trump and Kamala for the election. I know there's a lot of things going on, a lot of
positions. Kamala's emailed me like 12 times today. She hasn't brought this up. She hasn't brought
this up. No, no. We should not have dogs at youth sports tournaments. Period. End of story.
Do not bring your dog.
Here's all the bad things that can happen to your dog.
Your dog could just take a shit where all the parents are standing.
Right? You got that.
Your dog, you could have like a yapping dog in a thing.
And we have to listen to your dog bark the whole time.
You could think your dog wants to just go and walk over and go see some kid who's allergic to dogs.
So you have that thing.
And then the big thing is just a dog fight on the sidelines.
No dogs at sporting beds.
Just period.
Let's get rid of this.
What are we doing?
Especially drunk dogs.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I'm with it.
And you're a dog guy too.
I have two dogs.
I love dogs.
Guess why I don't want to see dogs at an outdoor sports tournament. Leave them home.
It's too much.
This one guy had one of those big canvas things that you would take if you're going to the airport.
And he had three little dogs in there. And they're just barking at everybody else.
And it's like, can I just watch the game without your three dogs barking in your little travel carrier?
There's no rule for that, huh? Usually there's a sign that says you can't do this,
but people don't care.
It's such a bad idea.
Like honestly, it's one of the worst ideas possible.
So anyway.
I'm with you.
Yeah, my son, they won the championship.
Oh good.
I posted the picture.
There's this picture and for some reason he has no shirt on in the picture.
So he's staying on brand at all times.
It's all these kids with their uniforms.
He's got his white shorts on.
He's got a blue sun hat and no shirt.
And I'm like, all right, Ben Simmons on brand at all times.
Let me ask you something because I'm not sure.
You know, I love you like a friend too.
I know you set me straight, but you posted, speaking of posts,
Happy birthday Murph.
Not every day your dog turns four or something like that.
Your dog is four years old.
I don't know that you could do this after going off on like national whatever day.
I'm not sure.
I said happy birthday to Murph, to my best friend Murph.
Yeah, it's fine.
I get it.
You do a birthday post?
You want a crusade against posting something for National Daughters Day, but when your
dog turns four, you're like, oh, I got to put that up there.
Birthdays are fine.
Post birthday.
Birthdays are fine.
Dog birthdays, yeah?
What's your dog's name?
I don't even know what my dog's name is.
It's Super Dave. It's Super Dave.
All right.
I guess what it turns for.
If you did a Super Dave post, I'd be like, oh, that's great.
Super Dave's 11 years old.
All right.
It might be 11.
I only birthday post that's it.
For dogs and family members.
That's it?
Yeah.
My wife, she made him like one of those dog like little dog cakes her and her mom made it
Which are like no no, it's but this isn't like the bad. This is like good for dogs
I'm like there's just no way any cake is good for dogs. He's gonna be shitting all over that, but he didn't shit
Yeah, he's really moved into zone. Can I tell you a quick dog cake story, please?
Shit now I'm gonna now I'm gonna get the name wrong. No, I can't.
I can't. What was it? Okay. So no, I was,
I went to a Simpsons table read with our friend Donick wrote on the Simpsons and
it was the coolest thing.
It was probably like within three months of moving me moving out here.
And it also happened to be their hundredth episode of what some kind of milestone
episode. So they had cake and so everybody's eating cake and I don't know why, but I didn't know that dogs
aren't supposed to have cake.
And so a dog comes up to me and I start feeding the dog
chocolate cake.
I think I'm doing something nice.
And this guy comes up and screams, he's like,
what the fuck, what the fuck, are you fucking kidding me?
What are you, you're feeding the dog cake?
Are you stupid?
Are you stupid?
You trying to kill my dog?
And I'm like, I'm sorry, guy.
I had no idea.
I didn't know it was a bad thing.
I thought it looked hungry.
It's like, it looked hungry.
You see how stupid you sound right now?
God, and he takes the dog, he walks away.
It was Hank Azaria.
Is that true?
I swear to God, it was true.
Asked our friend Tony and asked Donnie.
That's my, running with Hank Azaria.
And he used all his voices too, to dress me down. and Astonic. That's my run in with Hank Azaria.
He used all his voices too to dress me down.
How many years ago is this?
This was, I don't know, 24?
I should have known, yes.
I was almost 30 years old.
I should have probably known.
So this was after Heat when Pacino yelled at him.
Yeah, I think so.
She's got a great ass.
Go ahead, all the way up it.
He might have been channeling that.
Anyway, happy birthday, Hank Azaria's dog.
I'll post about it later.
Hank Azaria, wow.
Upgrading our friend, Sal.
That's terrible.
There you go.
What are you gonna do?
Thanks again to Workday for sponsoring this segment.
Be a finance and HR rockstar with Workday to learn more. Visit Workday for sponsoring this segment. Be a finance and HR rockstar with Workday
to learn more, visit Workday.com.
And if you've learned anything during this whole podcast,
leave your dogs at home during a youth sports tournament.
Yeah, yeah.
Get drunk on churros and margaritas, come on.
The margaritas are fine, we're not gonna judge you,
but don't bring your dog and pound the margaritas as you go.
What do you have to plug?
Lots of stuff.
Through the Ringer with Tate, it's delightful every week.
Cousin Sal's winning weekend.
I have Dwight Gooden on.
I'm gonna talk about the Mets.
Little post-mortem for the Mets.
Yeah, Dr. K, one of my favorites.
Ringer pre-game show with the fellas every Sunday morning
and against the Lods, it's Jenner, Trifecta and I
are doing an 11 hour deep dive
into who has the best shot at winning the NBA in season tournament. So there you go.
Wow. What was your favorite NBA future of all your NBA futures?
You know, I bet a bunch of yours and Rossellos and houses. Did I put that away now? I like,
I thought you guys have some teams to not make the playoffs.
Yeah.
Oh no, you have underwins and to not make the playoffs
was like plus 129.
Like New Orleans I think I had.
Yeah, Pelicans no playoffs, plus 129.
I think you guys like it.
And I rode your, I got a lot on Phoenix over.
You sure about that one?
I think I got a good number on that.
Yeah, I feel good about that.
I mean, the rank could get hurt.
That would be the way, you know, but you could say that about any team. Yeah, I feel good about that. I mean the rank could get hurt. That would be the way You know, you could say that about anything. Yeah, I feel good about where we landed and we had that Clippers under
Right, which was 37 half because we were kind of gambling that the Kawhi News maybe wouldn't be great. And then
Now it seems like I mean, I don't even know when he's coming back. So that's
35 and a half. Yeah, I think Ka think Hawaii moved it too, but yeah, we,
some of them moved I think probably cause people were probably looking at the
same things. Cleveland went up. The Philly one,
I think has stayed pretty similar,
but I feel like that one should probably start falling down at some point.
And then right after we did that pod, Hartenstein broke his hand.
Right. So, um,
I don't think that really budged.
You get all your money back. No, I don't think that really budged the over under though.
It was interesting.
But, yeah, I still, my favorite out of all of them
is probably still the OKC1 seed bet,
even with the Hardenstein injury.
All right, you know what, I didn't hit that one.
I'm gonna throw that in.
I think it was plus 130.
I don't know if it's up or down, but I think Phoenix.
We said Phoenix and maybe Minnesota were the only ones that could
get into the mid-tie fifties.
Yeah.
You'd be proud of me.
I did a bunch.
I did SAR for rookie of the year.
Welcome to the NBA hole club.
I did.
I know.
I did a little, I did SGA mostly for MVP, a little on Wembe.
So bonus for rebounds, Luca for assists. I'll go over them with you later. I love SGA mostly for MVP, a little on Wembe, so bonus for rebounds,
Luca for assists. I'll go over them with you later. I love it. Love it all.
I'm not allowed to bet the awards, so I wasn't super focused on it,
but I didn't realize the rookie of the year awards, the research was plus 750.
I thought that was pretty good value for him.
Because I think he's going to play.
No, I just think.
Edie's plus 290.
Shepard was plus 850.
I'm not sure he's going to get enough minutes.
And then Castle at 10 to 1 is interesting if he actually gets playing time.
But I thought if...
And then Klingon at 20 to 1.
Did you see him in the preseason the other night? He was interesting too. But, but I thought if, and then Klingon at 20 to one, just see him in the preseason
the other night. He was into, but, um, well, that's the thing. There's only like six guys
that are definitely going to get enough minutes, right? Barring injury from someone else is
going to play. And I think Atlanta is going to be pretty good. So that's a good one. Anyway.
All right, cuz good job by you. Good job by your buddy.
All right. That's it for the podcast. Thanks to you, Cousin Sal.
Thanks to Kyle Creighton and Steve Cerruti.
As always, don't forget, new rewatchable's hopefully
coming on Monday, and I'm gonna have a new podcast
for you either Tuesday or I won't see you again
until Thursday, not sure yet, but we'll see how it goes.
Rude for me, rude for my white cells, my T cells? What are the cells that help you not feel sick?
Rude for those.
So I'll see you Tuesday or Thursday. Don't forget you can watch this podcast that you just listened to.
I don't know why you would. Maybe you want to double dip on the Bill Simmons YouTube channel.
See you later in the week. I don't have a few years with him.
Must be 21 plus in President-elect states for Kansas in affiliation with Kansas Star
Casino or 18 plus in President DC.
Gambling problem?
Call 1-800-GAMBLER or visit rg-help.com.
Call 1-887-897777 or visit ccpg.org slash chat in Connecticut or visit mdgamblinghelp.org
in Maryland.
Hope is here. Visit gambling helpline ma.org or call 800-327-5050 for 24 seven support
Massachusetts or call one eight seven seven eight hope and why we're text hope
and why in New York.