The Bill Simmons Podcast - The Henne Game, Brady Over Brees, Most Fun Super Bowl Possibilities, and Round 3 Lines With Cousin Sal

Episode Date: January 18, 2021

The Ringer’s Bill Simmons is joined by Cousin Sal to discuss the nail-biter between the Chiefs and the Browns, the Buccaneers' win over the Saints, Ravens-Bills, and Packers-Rams (2:00), before gues...sing the lines for the conference championship games (51:00). Then they discuss the “most fun” Super Bowl matchup (1:00:30), before closing the show with Parent Corner (1:11:00). Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Coming up, Cousins Talent, I'm going to talk about Tom Brady taking the Patriots once again to the championship game in his conference. So it's, he's on the pucks. Oh, well, well, we're gonna talk about everything else. It's all next. It's the Bill Simmons podcast presented by FanDuel. Football is in full action. FanDuel's highest rated sports book is the best place to bet it all. We've been doing pretty well on million dollar picks this year. I love the first month of the season because you have to go into the season thinking, I think Pittsburgh's going to be good. I think the Chargers are going to be good. I think Seattle's going to be good. And then trying to back what you think in those first few weeks and then zag
Starting point is 00:00:37 the other way. If you were wrong, you could bet on new and fun markets on FanDuel, like to catch a pass, same game parlays, highest scoring game across the Sunday slate, offensive TDs in the next drive. They have so much stuff, it's crazy. The app is safe and secure and easy to use. And when you win, you'll get paid instantly. Plus, look out for FanDuel Squares this season. Here's what you have to do. Visit FanDuel.com slash BS to download America's number one sports book. The ringer is committed to responsible gaming. Please visit RG dash help dot com to learn more about the resources and helplines available and listen to the end of the episode for additional details. You must be 21 plus and present in select states. Gambling problem called Win 100 Gambler or visit RG dash
Starting point is 00:01:20 help dot com. This episode is brought to you by my old friend, Miller Lite. I've been a big fan of Miller Lite, man, since college days when I was allowed to have beer. I think nephew Kyle is a fan too. Miller Lite keeps it simple for us. Undebatable quality, great taste. Picture this, it's game day, all the gang's here. You're tailgating outside the stadium. It's a great time for beer. Or how about when you're standing at the grill and the smell of sizzling burgers is in the air? Moments like that. Or when you want a light beer that tastes like beer, that's delicious. You don't want to load up on those heavier beers and then you only have two of them. Then you feel tired. Your stomach feels full. Miller Lite, it's your friend. It just accompanies whatever
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Starting point is 00:02:36 Yeah, the first great modern action movie. We're going to explain why. It's me and Brian Koppelman. That's coming Monday night. Going on a little bit of an action movie run here in the rewatchable. Stay tuned for that. Coming up, round two. It was
Starting point is 00:02:52 eventful. First, Pearl Jam. All right, Sunday night taping this a little bit earlier than usual. It's only 7.19 Pacific time, Sal. Usually we're taping at like 8.45. We bought ourselves 90 minutes here. I'm glad. I'm exhausted. We should have just taped after that Chiefs game.
Starting point is 00:03:26 I was almost dead then. I can't take it. Let's talk about that game first. That was not only the game of the day. It was one of the gambling moments of the decade. The decade's pretty early. I don't know what it's called. It's either the Mahomes concussion game or the Chad Henney game.
Starting point is 00:03:43 It's clearly something. It was a roller coaster ride. And for the people listening at home, everybody and their brother had the Chiefs in some sort of parlay or tease or something. And they're up five. And well, I'm sorry to interrupt you, but especially since it went down to like seven, seven and a half on FanDuel, right? It was 10 all week, went down to seven and a half. They have a lineman out, Clyde Edwards-Alaire, who the hell cares, not playing. And then you do, you have the license to tease it to down to one and a half or two or whatever it is.
Starting point is 00:04:15 So go on, I'm sorry. I had a seven-point tease with the Packers. I had a Packers-Bills-Chiefs parlay. I had Chiefs-Bucks in a thing. Like everybody else, I had the Chiefs in everything. You just sprinkle them in. It's the old Sal method. I think I've had it for the last three years somehow.
Starting point is 00:04:33 I had this game on a teaser to finish out a teaser. But yeah, and we talked about what Fandle had, like Packers to beat the Chiefs in the Super Bowl or the Chiefs to beat the Packers. There were great odds on that. I just had it everywhere. And really just a stroke watching that game. Well, so you get the gift of all time
Starting point is 00:04:52 in the second quarter where Higgins is about to score and he fumbles it out of the end zone. It was the worst moment by a Brown about to go into the end zone in the history of the Browns. Oh, no, wait. It was the second quarter. Sorry. Sorry,, Oh no, wait, it was, sorry,
Starting point is 00:05:05 sorry, Browns fans. Very, very Browns ish. Very Browns. Yeah. So they basically give back seven points. So when that happens,
Starting point is 00:05:11 you think like, well, you do that against the chiefs. You're dead. 19 to three started the second half. I miss this. I was peeing, uh,
Starting point is 00:05:19 come back and the chiefs are celebrated. They've gotten a pick and now they're inside the 20. They're up 16. The game's over. This is it. They, it's pick. And now they're inside the 20. They're up 16. The game's over. This is it. It's like how many points do they score? They kick a field goal instead of a touchdown there. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:05:29 But still 19-3. All right, two scores if you get the two-point conversions. But it's not happening. Well, then they missed the field goal. So now it's 19-3. Right. And you're like, wait a second. And then fast forward to third and short.
Starting point is 00:05:43 You and I were texting about this. We were fighting about this. We're fighting about it. I, my homes was already hurt. He was limping around. He looked unhappy. He either had plantar fasciitis or a broken big toe. I didn't know what was going on, but he's clearly compromised. So third and short, they do this weird rollout play with him. That is basically designed to get him hit if he keeps it. And,'s down. And he's woozy. And the announcers fall into that awkward thing where it's like, that dude's concussed, but nobody can say it. And Nance is like, whoa, he doesn't know where he is.
Starting point is 00:06:13 And it's just so awkward right now in the concussion era. Yeah. And the thing is, well, now Jake Glazer, after the game here, after this game, was saying that he's in concussion protocol, but it's just as likely that he was choked out. If you watch, it was like a dirty play. And so now we got some MMA stuff going.
Starting point is 00:06:32 And just as he was about to get to his, it did look like he was kind of put out, like choked out as much as it was concussion. Because if you watch the hit, it wasn't helmet to helmet. Maybe it was helmet to cold ground. That could have been it. But to say ground. Um, that could have been it, but to say that he was choked out, my God, that is something different and would, would help his cause for playing next week, which we all know he's playing next week. So it was almost like
Starting point is 00:06:53 whiplash because it didn't seem like his head actually hit anything. But you know, as you said, it was such a, it was such kind of a dirty play, which of course they didn't legislate, even though they called 15 touchy whatever's. But, um, that, that's one of the things I hate about the third and short when you're, when you're exposing your QB to stuff like that, you're also exposing them to all these crazy dudes on the defense were like, Oh, cool. Here's my free shot at my homes. I just didn't feel like they needed to do it.
Starting point is 00:07:20 I know, but he's, he's so successful running the ball. He really is. Is he just going to be one of those quarterbacks? I know he was hurt last year because he did the quarterback sneak, and that was a fluke thing, too. But, yeah, I get that he's a target, but it's such a, you know, when he ran for the touchdown, no one cared from the one-yard line. Like, that was the play.
Starting point is 00:07:36 They have two unstoppable plays, though. They have the play that they ran to win the game, which we'll get to in a second, which is basically like Tyreek Hill is the fastest human being on the earth. If we need to get him a quick pass for a fourth and one, it's there every time. Or they have the third, third and short play action to Kelsey over the middle, which is the most unstoppable playing football. That's why I didn't like it.
Starting point is 00:07:55 So anyway, he goes out and when he does the wobble, you know, he almost would have been better off just staying down, right? If he stayed down for like a minute, then it's like, oh, what happened? He hurt his foot. That's what he's saying. He's on Green Street. Grab your foot, stare at your leg a little bit or whatever. Yeah, but as soon as you take him out and then, yeah, the
Starting point is 00:08:13 announcers were all over it. Like, that's it. He can't come back. With Lamar's not coming back from yesterday, he can't come back this game. Well, ironically, it was the Chiefs. This was the first time this ever happened in a playoff game where it was Chiefs-C Colts. I can't remember how many years ago it was at least six or seven. And, uh, it was that big, Oh, that big comeback game against the chiefs. Yeah. Right. Jamal Charles went out, remember? And he was clearly concussed. And this was right
Starting point is 00:08:39 as we were reevaluating how we felt, felt about concussions during football. And that was the first time I remember thinking like, they can't bring him back in. He has a concussion. Like we've just litigated this for the past year and they scratched him. And it was one of the reasons the Colts came back. So now all these years later, it was clear he wasn't coming back. So then it's like Chad Henney.
Starting point is 00:08:59 I looked up football reference. He was five and 22 in his last 27 starts. He hadn't won a game since 2013. How were you feeling with all your money on the chiefs at this point? And Chad Henney driving the car. I didn't feel great. Obviously you don't want to get it down to 22, 17 with the Browns, with the ball. Right. So I was like, okay, he needs to make one or two big plays. And I felt better about it this week and this year, better than I have in years past. When you see guys like Wolford and Tyler Heinekeke and and other guys who've never heard of step up i'm like chad henney he's taking some snaps he played week 17 he's still got all these you know stars around them
Starting point is 00:09:36 tyree kill you and i were going crazy like tyree kill why isn't he in the backfield pitching to him let him do an end around and stay in bounds. Key is to stay in bounds. And then it was a crazy thing. They took a penalty, a bad penalty, and then they throw long. And even the penalty gets him to the 38-yard line, which a field goal would have put him up eight. And he throws long. And he throws a punt five yards into the end zone.
Starting point is 00:09:59 It's like, holy shit, this is a toss-up game now. It wasn't even close. It was like one of your son's flag football games where the quarterback just is like, ah, fuck it. He just wings it. It was bad. Oh, man. Yeah, that was sad.
Starting point is 00:10:10 And then it's like, all right. Then, well, if you want to set up the ending, I mean, that was. And then the Browns punt to the Chiefs, which I didn't think was terrible. I heard some Chiefs fans like, thank you. That's all we needed. Like, well, your quarterback just threw one of the worst interceptions we ever saw.
Starting point is 00:10:24 And there's like over four minutes left. Like, I don't mind giving it back there. You still have to get a couple of first downs. But I was really proud of was that a text? I'm sure you went other text change. But me, you, House and Hancher on a text chain. All of us had the Chiefs. And we were talking about it in past tense like we already lost.
Starting point is 00:10:42 Like, this is the worst loss of the year. Never going to recover. I can't believe it. This happens once a already lost. Like, this is the worst loss of the year. Never going to recover. I can't believe it. This happens once a decade, a game like this. And I almost feel like we willed the Browns to fuck up that series when it seemed like on the one hand, I was comfortable because what were they? They had to go 70 yards. There's four minutes left.
Starting point is 00:11:00 They're taking forever. Baker at one point took 40 seconds between plays. There's nowhere to say it all. And it becomes clear a little like what we saw with new Orleans in the next game. Like, you know, they need to methodically go down the field. They had an 18 play drive earlier in the game. So that was the one thing I was excited about. But then when the chiefs got the ball back, you're just running through all the terrible Henny scenarios, right? Like he screws up a handoff, uh, pass gets tipped, mistiming off of Hill's hands,
Starting point is 00:11:27 all that stuff. But I'm with, we were saying like, just send Hill left and right, back and forth for fake reverses or reverses. He's like Steph Curry. When he's moving,
Starting point is 00:11:36 the whole defense freaks out. Yeah. So the kind of decoy, he could always just outlet into a pass formation or route. But yeah, just get him involved somehow. Right. And, and then, and then that third and 14 play.
Starting point is 00:11:50 Oh my God. There was a bad call first, right? What was it? What was the crack back black? It was close. If you look at the textbook, like if you look up the definition, it is really close. And you know, the chiefs were lucky, like miles Garrett, wasn't in there the whole game. I don't know what was going on there, but they were lucky, and they took advantage of that, obviously, when Mahomes is in there.
Starting point is 00:12:10 But that third and fourth, yeah, so that crackback... No, the crackback was the previous draft. That was before the pick, because I took that note. So it was crackback, block, Henny, terrible pick. Right.
Starting point is 00:12:19 So what was the other one that brought him back? The other one was some sort of dumb whatever, and it's third and 14. And I thought they were going to hand off because you're doing the math and you're just like, just punt. Baker's got to go 80 yards. Make him do it.
Starting point is 00:12:32 I don't think he can do it with Higgins and Landry and Njoku. And he drops back to pass. So now they're going to give him time on the clock. My God, they're going to bet a part of two minutes. But no, then he takes off. It's like, okay, smart. He'll go for three yards and then they'll punt. And then he ends up a half a yard short Romo and everyone's screaming. I have to say it was probably the best Romo call, even though he was wrong twice in a row, he was wrong about it being a first down. I'm like, ah,
Starting point is 00:12:58 something's down an elbow and knee. Something is down here. I know it is they're short. And then he was wrong about the fourth and one that they were going to snap it. And I think everybody in the world was wrong about that. They were going to snap it, except for Andy Reid. They did something on that play that I've been dying to see a team try for my entire life. And they finally did it. They went up to the line and Romo's like, oh, they're just trying to draw him off sides. Look at the body language.
Starting point is 00:13:23 He did the hard count. There's like 12 seconds left. Everybody relaxes and Romo literally says like, oh, look at the body language. They're not running a play. Yeah. And they didn't run it at the one second. They ran it at like six seconds. It was like six or five seconds.
Starting point is 00:13:38 And it was like, that was one of eight things wrong with this thing. Yeah. Right. They're playing possum and their thinking was like, if they're just on their heels for a split second and Tyreek gets a headstart on that little slant play that they run every time they need a yard. Yeah. That might be the split second. So he does it. But then Henny has to complete the pass. Did you think he was going to complete the pass? Cause I was, I think I was still in shock when they snapped it. I was like, I don't know what's going on here. This is a bill Belichick arrogance. This is this dwarfs it. Like, I can't believe this is the backup in shotgun. You're not
Starting point is 00:14:10 even going to try to draw them off sides or in shotgun and not even a great attempt to draw them off side. So there was none there. And then to snap it on five, if it's, I mean, honestly, like you and I, and we're all arguing about Andy Reed, not being a hall of fame coach after this, if they, even if that gets dropped or whatever, like what the hell did he do there? He left more You and I, we're all arguing about Andy Reid not being a Hall of Fame coach after this. Oh, God. Even if that gets dropped or whatever. What the hell did he do there? He left more time for him.
Starting point is 00:14:32 He could easily punt. Baker would have had, what, a minute 20 to go 80? Minute 20, no timeouts. He would have had to go 80 to 90 yards. Instead, he would have had it at midfield. I would have taken that. Yeah. And then he catches the ball, and they go, and Romoo goes nuts and they all go cray. And we will go ballistic. You know, it made me think, I don't know if he does that,
Starting point is 00:14:55 if they've never won a super bowl. And I know they talk about how, Oh, Andy's so ballsy. If you've never won a super bowl, you're probably not doing that. But I was thinking like, he's at the point in his life now, right? Where he wins it. He takes this giant monkey off his back. And it's like when you're on a family vacation when you're a kid and your dad splurges and you're staying in a nice hotel and he's already like gone too far. And then it's like, hey, dad, can we go to the nice place? He's like, ah, fuck it. Like he's just, he's already so far down the road with whatever. And he's just like, fuck it.
Starting point is 00:15:24 You know, and I think Andy's at the fuck it point of his career. I didn't get that. My father, we'd go to Hershey, Pennsylvania, sleep in a car every summer. Yeah. Yeah, Andy, I mean, look at Belichick. Like, he took more chances after he won one, two, three, four Super Bowl, right? Like, it didn't matter as much.
Starting point is 00:15:39 It was gravy. But he did treat that, at least he had Brady, like, retreated it as if my homes was back there. Right? Like he ran, every play was called as if my homes was the quarterback there. Unbelievable. It was an unbelievable playoff game.
Starting point is 00:15:54 And then we tie into, you know, the Browns piece of this where, you know, this is a tortured franchise. LeBron winning in 2016 removes the torture slightly, but the, still the Browns haven't won in forever.
Starting point is 00:16:09 It looked like for a split second here, when the drive where the Browns ended up punting, and you're doing the math and you're thinking like, man, if they score, there's no way Henny's going to be able to go 60 yards for a field goal. The Browns are going to play the Bills in the AFC title game. And there was about 40 seconds there when my brain broke. I'm trying to think like Brown's pills.
Starting point is 00:16:29 It's like the baggage ball. Can you imagine that the two fan bases with it? It's almost like we would have had a tie for seven overtimes. Yeah. But they'd also would have had to let all the fans in the stadium. Like, all right, I get it. This is a super spreader event that we're going to, we got the inauguration and we got this. Then we'll go back to being responsible. But everybody's
Starting point is 00:16:48 invited to this. Yeah, I went at it with a few Browns fans. I'm like, oh, come on. You wouldn't want to win like this against a backup quarterback. And then last week the bad snap over the stand. They're like, fuck you. We've been through shit for the last time. I was like, all right, all right, fine. You should have taken the game.
Starting point is 00:17:03 But you're right. The ball and all said and done, fumbling the ball through the end zone was a difference. Like, if that gets called helmet to helmet like it should have been, who is it? Sorensen? Yeah. You can't review that, I guess. I don't know why you can't review. If safety is the main focus here, I'm not sure why you can't review helmet to helmet. We've lost our mind with instant replay.
Starting point is 00:17:24 Like, the NBA spends five minutes at the end of every game reviewing a block or a charge, and yet seven other things can't be reviewed. And the NFL, they review all this dumb shit, and then these helmet to helmet hits can't be challenged. Yeah. I don't like to fumble through the end zone anyway. To me, that's way too big a penalty to make it a touchback
Starting point is 00:17:42 or when it touches the pylon and the guy drops it. All right, I've heard this case. So what, so what should it be then? What should happen? All I know is a field goal kicker could hit both uprights and the cross bar and, and six times and it can go through and you get three points,
Starting point is 00:17:56 but you accidentally drop a ball through the end zone on a bang, bang play. And I don't know, 20 yard penalty, 25 yard penalty, get it at your 20, get it at the 25 penalty. I like it. I, that yard penalty, 25 yard penalty. Get it at your 20, get it at the 25. Penalty.
Starting point is 00:18:06 I like it. I, that's one of my favorite rules. I like how bad it makes people every time. It's been a rule forever. I remember with the Patriots, the, the year champ Bailey returned it all the way. Pick six and God, the tight end Watson, Ben Watson came all the way across and hit him right as he was about to score. And the ball went diagonally and they looked at it for 20 minutes.
Starting point is 00:18:29 And I was like, oh, touchback, touchback. It's fun. I agree. I will say when I was thinking about that, Bill's Browns AFC title game for that 40 seconds with my brain broke. Where I landed was I had a strange sense of comfort because it seemed too improbable that those two teams would play for a super bowl bid and i actually felt like it was good for the chiefs i was like this is bills browns is too weird it can't happen that's yeah i didn't think i was what i was thinking of is how i'm gonna ask you to borrow money i mean i was like how
Starting point is 00:19:01 the chief's gonna what am i gonna do just tell, I'm always there for you. So a couple other weird things. Yeah. The Browns were down 19 to nine and went for one. Still can't figure that one out. They made it 1910 instead of, I don't know, to be down nine versus 10. Like, like why not try to be down eight? You're playing the chiefs. Mahomes isn't out of the game yet. I thought that was weird. So, of course, it came back to Hunter. If you ever have an opportunity to get bonus points against the Chiefs, I know the counter to that is, well, they weren't done scoring. Well, guess what? I mean, they basically were.
Starting point is 00:19:34 So, yeah, get as many points as you possibly can against them. That's another case where the analytics, I don't care what they say, or it's like, oh, 5% smart tech shit. No, it's like, no, you're playing the Chiefs. You need every point. And if you're down two scores, that's bad. So, you're 5% smart tech shit. No, it's like, no, you're playing the Chiefs. You need every point. And if you're down two scores, that's bad. So then they fall down 22-10. They need two touchdowns.
Starting point is 00:19:51 If they had gotten that two point, they would have been at 11. Baker, his stats didn't reflect that he threw a bad pick. But for the most part, I thought he was really impressive. I thought he was impressive last week. And I went from thinking he was case Keenum to now thinking, you know, there's something there. And you think like they didn't have Odell,
Starting point is 00:20:10 who was their big meal ticket guy. Higgins emerged into whatever he emerged. He looked like Michael Irvin by a halftime in this game and then Landry. And it's like, you know, maybe, maybe Baker is the guy. I was going to ask you this,
Starting point is 00:20:24 uh, take the rookies out of it, which two, if this is the guy. I was going to ask you this. Take the rookies out of it. Which two, if this is Casey Kasem's top 40, which two quarterbacks shot most up the charts in your eyes? I think Josh Allen has to be one because his completion percentage, he was a different quarterback the last two years, showed signs of brilliance, but now he's in the top three or four. So I think he has to be one.
Starting point is 00:20:43 Is Baker number two? Jameis. Jameis was perfect today. He really was. He's the best quarterback in the game. We'll get to him in a second. Yeah, I would say Baker. The thing with Cleveland and Baker is that it's at least something now.
Starting point is 00:20:59 Before, it was like, what do they do if it looks like it, you know, it looked these first seven weeks? Yeah. What do you do? You're in that same darn old Jets name. But I think he's a real leader too. I really think the energy that he brings play-to-play, series-to-series is, I don't know.
Starting point is 00:21:18 I think we give him more crap than we do. Well, first of all, there was all the stuff. There's the chugging the beer when they're on a losing team. And there's, you know, the whatever, the Cheesecake Factory thing was a fun story. But the fact that he's in every commercial, I think, begs us to demand more of him. Right? It's like, I don't want to see you all the time if you're just as good as me at throwing the ball. But he's stepped it up this year.
Starting point is 00:21:45 Yeah, the fact that he's in every commercial and Deshaun Watson, who's going to get traded for like five first-round picks, is zero. It's kind of telling. But yeah, I think it was salvageable. I have a Chad Henney story before we finish this game.
Starting point is 00:21:56 Can you believe I have a Chad Henney story? I'd have to hear it. Is this parent corner? No. So House and I, for the Super Bowl that was in Miami, the Patriots weren't in it. It was 2010 range. I didn't stay for
Starting point is 00:22:10 the game. I can't remember who was playing. It was the year before... Was it Saints-Colts? I think it was Saints-Colts. Yeah. I didn't stay for it. The games in Miami, whatever Super Bowl that was, and we do this thing with Audi that our friend Louis K hooked us up with where you have to drive this Audi
Starting point is 00:22:28 diesel car from DC to Miami. And we're in with like, there are all these, is that 10 years ago? It was at least 10 years ago. Jesus Christ. Chad Henney was one of the celebrities. And the goal was like,
Starting point is 00:22:39 can you drive this car all the way there with, I forget what the rules were. So remember this. Yeah. So house and I were, we were like, we want to win this thing. We're trying to raise money for charity. Um, and by the time we get to like, I don't know, one of the Carolinas, we're like, fuck it. We, if we get to Miami, it'd be 10 o'clock. We'll be able to go to parties. So we floor it. I try, we don't care about winning. Chad Henney was determined to win,
Starting point is 00:23:07 went 55 miles an hour the entire way with his radio off and the air conditioning off, drove with his wife. It took him like 14 hours and he was going like 54 miles an hour and he ends up winning it. And we were like, kind of like weirdly respected it. But at the same time, it was like, wow,
Starting point is 00:23:24 that's pretty fucking boring to drive 14 hours. No radio, no air conditioning. And House and I were texting during this thing where it's like, oh man, Chad Henney, 55 mile an hour Chad, our bets in his hands. And then the fourth and short 55 mile an hour Chad came through. He almost beat you again. Yeah. Wow.
Starting point is 00:23:44 That is insane. That was his most notable accomplishment before today. Good job by you. Not everyone has a Chad Henney story. He's been in the league 13 years. That's amazing. You know what else was amazing? The end of Drew Brees' career.
Starting point is 00:24:00 We're going to get to that after this break. This episode is brought to you by Movember. The mustache is back with a vengeance. Look at Travis Kelsey. Before he rocked that Super Bowl ring, he rocked that super soup strainer. Grow a mustache for Movember. You'll do great things too.
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Starting point is 00:25:03 Save big on electronics, fashion, and more this Prime big deal days october 8th and 9th uh all right the breeze funeral you could see this coming all year what was shocking was buck and acheman who i think have done a bunch of saints games and they they're just refusing to admit how bad the quarterbacks were in this game. Brady was either a C minus or a D plus where he finished. He was missing guys the whole game. But Breeze couldn't hit anyone more than eight yards down the field, which he's been like all year.
Starting point is 00:25:35 And there's a million stats about how they can't throw deep. And two hours into the game, the Bucs just move everyone up. It was like they realized, oh shit, what if we just move everyone up? And that's it. Kamara can't run the ball anymore. There's guys everywhere. And Breeze ends up with a pretty ignominious ending.
Starting point is 00:25:51 Do you feel bad for Drew Brees today? I did. And I think with the, with the announcer specifically with Drew Brees, I think they knew this was his last game in the Superdome if he lost. And they're like,
Starting point is 00:26:01 I think they'd get a whisper of, hey, be careful with Drew. This is his retirement party. If we're going to give him a gold watch, let's not smack him in the face with it. You know, let's just be careful. And I think that's what it was. And until the second or third, I mean, God, that was so towards the end of the third quarter at both quarterbacks were hovering around a hundred yards. Like what it would come on. We, we deserve four yards of pass. Yeah. It was really rough. Yeah. It was at seven for 13 for 60 yards. It was all that same shit.
Starting point is 00:26:27 Remember Brees was like 22 attempts for 99 yards at one point. They flashed that graphic. He wasn't even at five a pass. And his outlet pass was to Alvin Kamara. We talked about this yesterday when we were discussing which teasers to make and stuff. Like, I don't know. Kamara had 17 targets in the two games against Tampa Bay. He really ate them up.
Starting point is 00:26:45 He ate the linebackers up. And Devin White coming back was huge. They shut Kamara out on the receiving end. I think he ran for 85, but only caught 20 yards worth of passes. But you're right. And Michael Thomas, just gone. I'd love to know what happened to that guy. That is the biggest question mark of the playoffs right now.
Starting point is 00:27:03 The playoffs the whole season. This guy had 160 catches last year disappeared all together and it reminded me of uh remember that year chris johnson rushed for like 2 300 yards and then two years later he was like on the jets right yeah like what happened to that guy that guy was the best running back in the league thomas was the best receiver in the league and that, and he was invisible today. And not only invisible, but it's not even like the, usually these, these monster receivers, you force the ball to them.
Starting point is 00:27:31 And all right. If you get a pick that way, it's one thing, but didn't even really look his way that much. No. And he, and Thomas's body language is terrible too. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:27:40 It seems like that was a rocky relationship though. Yeah. I wonder like, you know, clearly they'll trade him. I bet this offseason would be my guess. Oh, yeah. I think he's got to be gone. Unless there's some sort of Jameis thing.
Starting point is 00:27:51 But you would have thought, like, he was two first-round picks minimum in a trade. And now I don't even know if he's a first-round pick. Right. He's so bad this season. So the Breeze thing, you had a feeling this was going to come down to which quarterback was going to screw up. Whether it was going to be a fumble on a sack, a bad pick, whatever. And it was finally Breeze. But Brady missed, you know, this Bucs offense.
Starting point is 00:28:16 And I like the Bucs. I bet on them to win the Super Bowl. But I think they have real flaws, right? Special teams is a flaw. That game management, dumb dumb penalties stuff like that and they if they're not getting like that the one or two explosive play per half it just seems choppy all the time like how many bad third and fives third and fours third and ones where the brady's looking at disbelief because the guy went the wrong way or you know he throws to gronk
Starting point is 00:28:42 but gronk's completely covered and it just feels disjointed. And they just got so much energy from those breeze plays that, you know, in a weird way, it puts some wind in their sails, but I'm still not sold on their offense. Are you? I don't know. I know how you're playing this and I recommend you did the right thing. You bet Tampa Bay big today and you better bet them again next week, even though we know green Bay is better because this is just going to tear your heart out. If Tom Brady goes to the Superbowl and I can tell by our text exchange, you're really looking for every little thing to kill Tom Brady. And the fact that he beat a team that he lost to twice badly, isn't enough for you. You're like, has he even thrown a good ball today? I was like, Oh, I can't wait for this. This coming on the
Starting point is 00:29:23 heels of a 30 point Celtics loss. This is going to be a rough day for you. I was like, oh, I can't wait for this. This coming on the heels of a 30-point Celtics loss. This is going to be a rough day for you. I'm like Carrie Bradshaw after Mr. Big met Bridget Boyd ahead. I'm just bitter. Yes. She's so cute. I hope she does. But you're right.
Starting point is 00:29:38 He didn't have to do much because they gave him great field position. He had 199 yards, 18 for 33. And I think Brate was their leading receiver with 50 yards. So I don't know what's going to be. They crushed Green Bay. We'll obviously guess the line later. But you can't feel great about Tampa Bay other than they got the monkey off their back
Starting point is 00:29:59 with the New Orleans matchup. But there was a moment in the first half where I just felt like they were the better team. They didn't play well, and they hung around, and the guys were three guys on every tackle and stuff like that, and they really felt like they had the eye of the tiger. They also caught a couple
Starting point is 00:30:16 breaks, though. I think they really missed Taysom Hill today. Everybody shits on Taysom Hill for the four plays where he gets shoehorned in on these third and ones or in the red zone, stuff like that. But half the time those plays work and they miss that. And then Harris going out was a murder because that guy is an electric, terrifying special teamer. And I was just talking about suck with the yeah, with the degenerate trifecta.
Starting point is 00:30:40 I was like, if Taysom Hill is in, forget about the Jameis stuff. All right. Jameis should be in. He should be in over Breeze. It's fun to say, but if Taysom Hill is in just in his regular offensive packages, do they win the game? I bet they come close. I bet they cut down on a couple errors and they convert a third and seven that Drew wasn't able
Starting point is 00:30:58 to. I think if Belichick was the co-chair, I just don't I don't think Breeze plays this game Really? Wow I think he would have cut the cord with him at this point
Starting point is 00:31:13 His last game in the Superdome? I think he would have cut the cord weeks ago I think post-broken ribs I just don't think he would have brought him back The dude had 11 cracked ribs He's old The thing that was really noticeable for me since he came back was brought him back and yeah you know the dude had 11 cracked ribs he's old sure yeah he the thing that was really noticeable for me since he came back was the the light wasn't in his eye
Starting point is 00:31:31 he really looked like he he looked like a boxer who was in the last three rounds of a really grueling fight who just was like i just get me the 15th round that's why he has the eye black underneath right right? Maybe that is. The light's in his eye indoors, yeah. But you know, like Breeze used to be like very Mayfield-y. He used to be like high energy, like very charismatic. And the guy this year just looked like an old guy who was hanging on. And I don't know.
Starting point is 00:31:57 I think you can sense that if you're the Bucks. You know, you were like, this guy's banged up. It was a little like what Manning was like that last year in Denver, where he was hanging on, you know, we see this sometimes. And it's sad. This is the, the breeze today is, you know, this breeze will fade away. It's had nothing resembling the guy from seven, eight years ago. No, for sure. And you know, when they bring in the backup to throw the long pass, which should have been obvious, I don't, can't believe Tampa got beat on that. And anytime you split a quarterback, it shouldn't be, which should have been obvious. I can't believe Tampa got beat on that. Is that even count as a trick play? What is that?
Starting point is 00:32:26 No, it shouldn't be. It's not a trick. No trick in it, right? Drop the safeties back when that happens, when Hill's in and when Winston's in on running a pass route, theoretically. But yeah, he's going to throw the ball. But yeah, I agree with the Breeze thing. They weren't afraid to throw long.
Starting point is 00:32:45 Emmanuel Sanders was good for him for the 13-yard turnaround out route. But other than that, it wasn't pretty for him going deep downfield. The star of the game was Fournette. Yeah, he really was. Playoff Lenny was awesome. He's going to be playing himself into a $50 million contract from somebody. But
Starting point is 00:33:01 the fact that he was catching the ball. He out-Camaried Camara, I thought. Yeah. Because they ran the three or four Gronk plays, all staples from the Patriots era. I've seen them all a million times. Two of them were almost caught. One was overthrown, whatever.
Starting point is 00:33:18 They tried to get Brown involved. Couldn't get him. They tried Evans deep. Never happened. Godwin was all short stuff. And then the one long one was Scotty Miller, which Brady underthrew. Fournette was the guy. Yeah, 107 total yards. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:33:33 Hard yards, though. I didn't feel like they were wide open holes, anything like that. I thought some of the catches he made. Going forward, I'm trying to think, can this Bucs team do this two more times when they're this sloppy? Cause week after week, Brady never seems completely on.
Starting point is 00:33:52 He always seems a little uncomfortable. They can run the ball, but not, you know, not like a, like a Derrick Henry, Tennessee level, but they can move the chains. But I wouldn't say they were an awesome running team. Um, defensively they're fine. I don't think they're amazing. Those picks today were really bad, and special teams are a little shaky.
Starting point is 00:34:13 I find it hard to believe they can do this in Lambeau next week. Well, that's the tough one, right? Because we've seen the Chiefs who haven't covered. Obviously, this was a special game because Mahomes wasn't in, but it's now been two months since they've blown out an opponent. The bills, arguably the luckiest team to be there. Very good, but really kind of fell apart on a lot of different levels. I know we're going to get a lot of shit from fans, but, uh, you know, lucky and happy.
Starting point is 00:34:39 I mean, you have to think like, you know, Josh Allen and Rogers was salivating watching these games today, right? Like this is, Oh, this is perfect. We need the Browns. How do we just miss out on the Browns? If you're Josh Allen and Rogers is like, yeah, I'll take either of these teams. But yeah, next week is a tough one. Despite the fact that they crushed green Bay earlier in the year. Yeah. House was furious at Lamar. I don't know why he put the Ravens in a tease, but he was trying to kind of all the round two quarterbacks who were better than Lamar and we're including backups and Chad Henney wide receivers who have
Starting point is 00:35:11 thrown passes. And the guy who's the guy Huntley who replaced Lamar was actually pretty good. Yeah. I Rogers in that Rams game, I saw everything I wanted to see in that game. Cause golf was, we might as well go to that game. Cause golf was, we might as well go to that game. Now golf was better than I think anyone expected. I thought it was single-handedly going to lose that game. And he was fine. He didn't make any plays with his legs, but he made some good throws. Yeah. I think you texted golf looks terrified. And then like a minute later, golf is no longer terrified. He was like, he was like 21 for 27, six incompletions. And I think
Starting point is 00:35:44 three of them were on that last drive. So at half his, his miscues on the last drive, he kept them in that game. It was weird, but you're right. Rogers is just, it's similar to the chief's offense. It's just a little, it's not as flashy, but it's just as in control and can strike quickly. And you just wait for shit to open up. And he's just so damn good. It really didn't matter what Jalen Ramsey out there.
Starting point is 00:36:06 Now I agree. Aaron Donald, if you saw the gear he was wearing, like it was, that was Terminator type shit. Did you see the Jay Glazer thing? It looked like he was fighting in Iraq with that vest. He could barely hold it up. He's like, this thing weighs like 77 pounds. I don't know how I'm going to do this.
Starting point is 00:36:19 But yeah, so it wasn't the Rams defense that we were accustomed to, but still the Rams defense. And they could have scored in the mid-40s. Lazard dropped the pass. That last job drive stalled purposely so that they can run the clock out. And Jones was like a hair away from breaking three runs, too. They were the better team the whole game.
Starting point is 00:36:40 For sure. I think there's a world, if Goff was healthy, if Donald was 100% and if cup was playing, I think that would have been a good game. I don't think the, I don't think the Rams would have won, but, um, I thought that was a suspicious line. I thought, you know, I was thinking about it because the manifesto, which has been very successful million dollar picks and five and all my big bets in these playoffs the manifesto one of the staples of the manifesto since the late 1990s was don't overreact to the previous round right it feels like there was some unbelievable overreacting with some of the lines like that browns line for that to dip to eight i thought was incredible granted they covered but i just couldn't believe
Starting point is 00:37:22 that the chiefs it was down to seven and a half in their home. And they have Mahomes and a lot of rest. The Ravens-Bills, I have no idea why that went under three. I just don't understand it. Lamar put up 20 points the week before. It wasn't like they were lights out. People were like, Lamar, here he is. I was like, really?
Starting point is 00:37:41 Is he here? And then that Rams line, I don't understand it. I don't know why that, why weren't the Packers favored by seven and a half, eight? I think that should be higher. Yeah. Yeah. Yes.
Starting point is 00:37:51 Especially when they don't name the quarterback until Friday. Like we're going to go with the guy who was carted off by an ambulance or the one playing with like a half a thumb, or are we going to activate like Blake Bortles here, which I think they did, but yeah, it was not looking good for the, for the Rams. And, and you think if they shut down cam makers, which I think they did. But yeah, it was not looking good for the Rams. And you think if they shut down Cam Akers, which he didn't have 160 yards, he had 90.
Starting point is 00:38:11 He was good, though. Yeah, I thought he was really good in that game. He's good. But their defense steps up, like that Kenny Clark, Z'Darrius Smith, the very underrated Packers defense, I think we're looking at now. Totally. That's a tough one for the Rams,
Starting point is 00:38:23 because I do think there's a world if you played this season 10 times where they could have won a Super Bowl in one of the 10 times. They had some bad luck injuries at a bad time. I don't think they, you know, we'll see what happens with Goff. He certainly was a little
Starting point is 00:38:39 bit better than maybe we were all expecting in that game. but for the most part to have that kind of money committed to somebody who McVay clearly doesn't a hundred percent believe in. Plus they traded the picks for Ramsey. And, um, this was kind of, it had to be this year or next year, basically for them with all the investments they made, you know? Yeah. Well, they might be close. I mean, that, that division is always tough. That that's, what's weird about that division. Like that's, um, It kind of collapsed on us, right?
Starting point is 00:39:07 San Francisco with the injuries. Arizona, Kyler Murray. I don't know if he's also injured or whatever, but the offense has left a lot to be desired in that last quarter. Well, now we have Brady Rogers, which feels like destiny. Right. And my dad and I were talking yesterday. We watched Brady for 20 years. I watch every Patriots game. And my dad was like, how yesterday We watched Brady for 20 years
Starting point is 00:39:25 I watch every Patriots game And my dad was like How many times did we play Rogers? And I was like, honestly, I don't know You could tell me two You could tell me four You could tell me zero Like, I don't remember any Brady-Rogers game
Starting point is 00:39:37 I'm sure they happened But if it did happen, it wasn't Yeah A signature game, but now It's the first time in the playoffs This will be it, yeah Yeah Yeah, it's very exciting time in the playoffs. This will be it. It's very exciting.
Starting point is 00:39:49 It's what everybody wanted. It's weird that they did it as a 5-seed, but they beat up on the NFC East team and then they're like, we're going to avenge our loss against the Saints. And now it's like Rodgers is a young buck now against Brady. Forget betting. Who are you going to root for if you had no money at stake? What's the more fun storyline? Tampa going to root for? Forget betting. Who are you going to root for if you had no money at stake?
Starting point is 00:40:05 What's the more fun storyline? Tampa going to the Super Bowl or Rodgers-Mahomes? I think, how can I say no money at stake? I mean, I want you to be upset, so I'd want Brady to go to the Super Bowl. But I think that they're considerably better
Starting point is 00:40:22 than the Packers, so that's where my money's going. I think it's the only bet to make next week. Well, we'll take a break, and then we'll talk Bills-Ravens quickly and that AFC matchup. This episode is brought to you by Coca-Cola Creations. You love the taste of Coca-Cola and love the cookie crunch of Oreos. But what happens when the best drink and the best cookie in the world get together? The best becomes Besties.
Starting point is 00:40:52 Try the new Coca-Cola Zero Sugar Oreo Limited Edition. Besties for a limited time. Taste it while it lasts. Copyright 2024. The Coca-Cola Company. Copyright 2024. Mondelez International Group. All right. Ravens-Bills. Tucker hits both uprights. When they hit the second upright, you're like, there's no way they can win now. We've both been watching football long enough where I'm just like, when is that ever a good sign?
Starting point is 00:41:21 It's like the sign of the beast. No way. Two field goals, each upright. It's like, sign of the beast. No way. Two field goals, each upright. It's like, all right, you guys are fucked. Lamar. He was making some great Mr. Furley type. I'm dating myself now. Some comedy faces, too, talking around those misses, too.
Starting point is 00:41:35 I love the Mr. Furley joke. That was awesome. Really good. The Bills, Allen, who was spectacular last week, and then in this game, couldn't hit any deep throws. They had all these cool plays. Each time you miss the guy, it felt like they could have had 20 more points than they ended up weird weather.
Starting point is 00:41:52 There's some wind, but the Ravens couldn't move the ball. And at some point it became a Lamar referendum. He was terrible. He, so house texted this 30.1 points during the regular season, 13 put on the playoffs. The pick six was abominable and the game was over when it happened. He threw a triple coverage. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:42:13 Um, he got concussed after that on the snap. We saw two of the worst snaps in the history of the playoffs back to back weeks, but that's not intentional grounding gets concussed, gets out of the game. And in some ways, like I think if he had stayed in, it might've even gotten worse because they would have been on like the one yard line.
Starting point is 00:42:30 So now I, if I'm a Ravens fan, I just don't know how I feel going forward because these, these playoff things, it's not even like James Harden level. Cause at least James Harden like did well in a couple of playoff games. Right. This is just like a two year disaster. I don't know what to think. I mean, you read those numbers off versus playoff teams versus non-play. I mean, they need the Bengals teams like the Bengals to make the playoffs.
Starting point is 00:42:51 That's the only way to do it. But this game was so messed up, right? I mean, think about like the bills. Imagine not covering on a teaser. You're having the Ravens plus nine, nine and a half, eight and a half, whatever, right in there. The bills at 230 total yards. They had 32 rushing yards.
Starting point is 00:43:06 The Ravens, inside the 30, five times. They scored three. They scored three points and gave up seven. They're inside the 30 five times. They allowed seven and scored three. And all those missed field goals, which everyone wanted to blame Al Michaels. People were actually blaming Al Michaels. Like, all right, will you calm down?
Starting point is 00:43:27 What are you doing here? Al Michaels is 80. Leave him alone. Yeah. He's not blowing it for Tucker here by mentioning it or mentioning that the bills went wide, right? That's no effect on the game, but yeah, you're right. I mean, that 101 yard pick six. It's such, it's like three pick sixes.
Starting point is 00:43:42 It's such a killer. There's no, no coming back from that. And that was a recurring theme with him in the red zone. You know, what was the game when they played Tennessee in the regular season? If they scored, it was like first and goal from the nine. It's like, what, seven, eight weeks ago. Just scored touchdown, game's over, couldn't do it.
Starting point is 00:44:00 I don't think he's accurate enough. Now, we saw Allen, and a lot of people have talked about this this year. Allen wasn't accurate enough last year and made unbelievable strides. And now is I think accurate. He wasn't accurate yesterday in deep balls, but for the most part, accurate, I don't think Lamar is accurate enough. And if you're rooting against him or you're betting against him, you're rooting for him to go back into the pocket and try to throw the ball
Starting point is 00:44:22 more than 10 to 12 yards. Cause you don't feel like he's going to complete it. It's so hard, right? Cause he's a phenomenal fantasy player back to back thousand yard years, rushing a MVP last year. So how are we going to kill him and say, this is not the answer, but you do watch him and he does look like, and we were talking about this. He's a minor, minor knee injury away from being like RG three with not as good an arm you know right what if he decides to not run it he's like you know what i don't want to uh this happens all the quarterbacks gonna happen to josh allen all of them they're gonna be like i just don't want to run it as much uh it probably will happen to my homes very soon um not the very next game like seven hours ago
Starting point is 00:44:59 yeah like a few hours ago but that um that was such a strange game. I don't want to take anything away from Buffalo, but, um, bizarre, bizarre game. I think because I, I, I labeled it the game I want to see the most. I'm like, this is gonna be a 10, six final. And it wasn't too far off. Buffalo's defense was terrific. One of my big cases for picking them this week was I watched them a lot this year. I just thought they had a bad week last week. I thought the Colts surprised them. You and I were talking on the phone yesterday about it. Yeah. And I was just like, I just think Rivers played really well
Starting point is 00:45:29 and the Colts played really well. And the Bills had to dig deep and they had like a 96-yard drive, an 84-yard drive. And the Colts like really, really made them work for it. I thought it was a little bit of an aberration. The Ravens,
Starting point is 00:45:42 I just don't think they're explosive enough offensively. And the Lamar thing's weird because I think he's considered one of the signature quarterbacks, but I think of all the signature quarterbacks, he's kind of the one least likely to win four straight playoff games in January and February. I don't see it. Interesting.
Starting point is 00:46:00 Unless he can figure it out. Yeah. Cause Alan, we would have said that last year about Allen. When they blew the 16-point lead, it's like, that guy's not accurate. You're not winning a Super Bowl with that guy, and he fixed it. Well, there are lesser quarterbacks.
Starting point is 00:46:12 Baker may feel one of them that you'd be more confident in scoring 40 points in a given playoff game, right? Like, you're just not. You're not there with Lamar yet. Can we do Collinsworth impersonations of how excited he was about the Bills Mafia? Go ahead. Al, I know there's only 8,000 people here, but I swear it feels like 80,000 now.
Starting point is 00:46:31 I really do. It feels like 80,000 here. They were pumping in fake noise, though. That's why it sounded loud, because you had the 8,000 real people, but then you also were allowed to do the fake noise, I think. Yeah, they're supposed to keep it at a decibel that's not overwhelming. They don't want the league to tamper with that. But yeah, you're right.
Starting point is 00:46:49 It was good to see fans all over the place, though. I have to say. I'm glad there wasn't nobody in a lot of these stadiums. But now we got two outdoor games. Well, I think it really hurt the Saints today. You did? Especially with how kind of sloppy the bucks were. If you had put in the 80,000 screaming people that could have tilted them.
Starting point is 00:47:11 And, uh, and then the chiefs, I think that was another one. I Baker Mayfield just shouldn't be that comfortable in arrow to receivers. Yeah. You're probably right. Would have been different.
Starting point is 00:47:20 I thought for the bills, the encouraging thing was the defense was just way better this week. And that was, that was what I was saying about watching them all year. It just felt like their defense was better than they looked last week. Rivers hit a lot of good throws and made them look worse, but they were solid. So we got Super Bowl odds, Packers plus 210, Chiefs plus 210, Bills plus 330, Bucks plus 430. I can't remember more bunched together when we get to the final four, right?
Starting point is 00:47:47 Well, you're going to see the lines themselves are pretty short. So that's why it makes sense. But usually there's like an 8-1 or something like that. Not this year. So I have a 27-1 Bills-Bucks bet that I made after week 16. Oh, wow. That I am now in full hedge territory as we've covered many, many times in this podcast. Neither of us have ever hedged a bet correctly in our lives, except for one time I texted you. I found an excerpt in my column of a
Starting point is 00:48:18 bet we hedged correctly in like 2009 or 2010. Remember? You sure you didn't make it up? Yeah. No, I texted you. It was like, look at this. We did this correctly. It was the one time it's ever happened. It was a basket. Oh, it was the, uh, it was Mavs heat 2011. We bet on the Mavs to win the finals and we were going to hedge on the heat in game six. And we decided not to, we rode the Mavs and we actually won. Yeah. So we, but we still, we still have a good 11, 12 years before we do it right again. Right. You're not going to say maybe once every 10 years it happens. So we're, we're like two and 400. That's an area.
Starting point is 00:48:48 So I, you know, I could just, I guess I could hedge it by just betting the Packers and the chief straight up. Although that wouldn't work. Cause if one of them won and the other didn't, I don't know what to do. I have no idea how to hedge this. Well, I think how about a money line parlay with the favorites and then if and when the Packers win,
Starting point is 00:49:07 you could figure it out from there. Well, how about this? Yeah. Maybe I just write, maybe I have the right teams. Let it ride. Yeah. My home's coming off an injury
Starting point is 00:49:17 with some sort of hobbled foot and everything going on there. And then, you know, top and layup. Let's figure this out. All right. So right now that parlay you have is plus 551. What do you have it at?
Starting point is 00:49:29 27 to one. Oh, that's better. Yeah, that's better. Yeah, there's a better answer. That's five times two. You know what? We'll guess the lines. Okay.
Starting point is 00:49:37 And then we'll figure out what the hedge potential is. We'll take one more break. We're going to play guess the lines. What's the feeling of fall? It's finally catching the sunrise. And not because you woke up early. No, you woke up nice and late. And you know what?
Starting point is 00:49:54 The sun waited. Then you went and got what you love from Starbucks. The new pecan crunch oat latte and new baked apple croissant. And enjoyed that warm apple filling and those nutty flavors with rich brown buttery notes while the sun rose just for you. That's the feeling of fall.
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Starting point is 00:50:49 now it's 8.05 West Coast time. Is there a Chiefs line? There is a Chiefs line. Okay. Surprised to hear that. I mean, I might as well tell you what it reflects with regard to his play. I figured.
Starting point is 00:51:06 They think he's going to play. Can I ask you what the first... I've really tried to avoid this as much as possible. I'm guessing they went Chiefs-Bills first, and then they're going Packers-Bucks. If they had their choice, they would do that, but they alternate. So NFC was late last year, so now they just...
Starting point is 00:51:22 NFC's early. Tampa Bay-Green Bay's early. It's 3.05 Eastern. Oh, wow. So let's do that uh, NFC is early. Tampa Bay, Green Bay is early. It's, uh, three Oh five Eastern. Oh, wow. So let's do that one first. Packers bucks. It's in Green Bay.
Starting point is 00:51:33 So I was torn between pack minus three and pack minus two and a half. Oh, really? And I, and I kept coming back to this saints game and how the line was three all week and then it dropped down to Saints two and a half. I think the Packers are slightly better than the Saints. So I'm going to go Packers by three.
Starting point is 00:51:57 I think this is a field goal line. Packers by three over Tampa. You're going to get mad, but I hit this exactly. My thinking was it can only be three, three and a half, four or four and a half. And the four and a half was too high. I thought three and a half was favorite,
Starting point is 00:52:13 better, more likely because they're the better team and their home. What does home mean anymore? I don't know. I went three and a half and it is three and a half. So I just missed it. I saw, I saw Aaron Andrews, our friend, I went three and a half and it is three and a half. So I just missed it. That's fair.
Starting point is 00:52:29 I saw Aaron Andrews, our friend, interviewed Brady after the game and asked him about, is it true your blood has thinned a little bit since you've been in the South? And he's like laughing like, yeah, it is. It's weird because cold weather Brady was amazing. Like he loved cold weather. He was great in cold weather, but now he's been in Florida for the last few months.
Starting point is 00:52:45 So it's where you talk about when they move this game, is this going to be the night game or the day game? Like it really, it's would have been unfair if they did have the choice to put the Packers later. It's like, that's an extra four or five degrees if you're bumping it three hours. And by the way,
Starting point is 00:52:59 if breeze had won, we would have seen so many stats all week about how terrible he is in cold weather. And he's pretty bad, especially against the spread. Especially this version of Brees. I believe this line would be three by Sunday. You do?
Starting point is 00:53:14 I do. I do. I think the Bucs are a public team, even more so than the Packers. You could see it in the line. The line almost got to two today. Yeah. I mean, Tom Brady is a playoff better's dream. He really is.
Starting point is 00:53:30 They load up on him, whether they do it early in the week or later in the week. I'm not sure. Warren Sharp did this whole thing on Ring NFL Show on Friday with House about when teams play for a third time, when the first two times, one team beat the crap out of the other team. And the numbers were pretty good. It was like the third third time they're 13 and four house.
Starting point is 00:53:48 And I were talking about it in a normal year. I would have been really scared to take the bucks, but I think this goes back to like, I think you throw all the historical shit out this year. This is such a weird year with the COVID and the barely any fans, like even Brady going to Lambeau. He's not really going to Lambeau. He's not really going to Lambeau. It's not going to be 80,000 people.
Starting point is 00:54:06 It's going to be what, 15? Yeah. 12? Right. I get it. But the Packers were, what, 7-1 at home? Like all these good teams were almost unstoppable at home. They didn't lose much on the road either.
Starting point is 00:54:21 Yeah, it's tough with Tampa. I'm not sure what you did so you would go take him at three huh I don't know what I'm doing yet I think the line will end up
Starting point is 00:54:32 you have to bet him I'm gonna definitely bet I'll probably bet on Brady just so I can root root for him while also having my feelings hurt the whole time right
Starting point is 00:54:39 there you go you know my dad and I were talking about it yesterday we we just think the the Bucks are a way better team they have way more weapons there you go. You know, my dad and I were talking about it yesterday. We just think the Bucs are a way better team. They have way more weapons. I can't fault them. Watching that terrible Patriots team this year,
Starting point is 00:54:53 Brady clearly saw it last year. He's like, get me out of here. We say this is a messed up year, but Tampa Bay Lightning, I believe, were the top seed. The Dodgers were the best odds on favorite for baseball. Lakers
Starting point is 00:55:07 were supposed to win the title. Maybe it makes sense that both one seeds meet up. True or false? Aaron Rodgers 0-3 in his last three conference title games. I'd be dumb to say false. Is that true? That's true. Against Seattle.
Starting point is 00:55:27 They lost the Seattle game in 14. No. They lost to the Atlanta Falcons 44 to 21 in Green Bay. Was that in Green Bay? No, this is the first time they've posted. Yeah. That was Atlanta. And then they lost the one to San Francisco last year. San Francisco. That's right. And then they lost the one to San Francisco
Starting point is 00:55:46 last year. San Francisco. That's right. They got killed by them. In San Francisco. But this time around they are home. Yeah, Rogers this is as far as he's I don't think he's been the favorite in this round probably, you know, since you were
Starting point is 00:56:04 working for Jimmy Kimmel Live and our kids were like three years old. It's been a long time. I'm so pumped for this. I'm glad they didn't screw it up. I'm like, Browns get out of the way and Rams get out of the way and we're going to have a nice final four here.
Starting point is 00:56:19 Did you know Matt LaFleur and Sean McVay were friends? I guess. I didn't know they extended each other. With Washington. Yeah, I mean, I guess they coach didn't know the extent of it. They knew each other? With Washington. Yeah. I mean, I guess they coached together on Washington, but they can't bring it up. They love it.
Starting point is 00:56:33 Schrager did a whole thing on the pod with me on Thursday about it, but it's like catnip for the TV shows. You got to do it. Two coaches knew each other and they can show the team photo from when they were assistants together. Absolutely. And then they can get an interview, but then they can bring the other guy into the interview. Like, they fucking love it. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:56:45 Let's do six degrees of anybody like, Oh, Lazard. And, uh, and they do each other. We're, uh,
Starting point is 00:56:54 we're at a movie theater together. Carissa Thompson interview in both. I watched a lot of the pregame shows. Yeah. Saturday, Sunday. I don't get the interviews. I don't know who the audience is for those.
Starting point is 00:57:07 Who is it? Let's figure this out right now. Who is the audience? It's not you and me. My wife's not watching. It's not our children. I don't think it's people in college, but who's like,
Starting point is 00:57:17 oh, cool. They got Honey Badger. I know. He's on Skype. They're going to ask him questions. It's like, who is this for? And if you're going to ask some questions,
Starting point is 00:57:25 like, why not play like a game show? Like, do like the Kyle Brandt 10 questions. Like, do some sort of format. Man, you must be jazzed to be in another round two of the playoffs, huh? I like it. Those are the questions. I don't get it. I don't understand who that's for.
Starting point is 00:57:39 I think we get in trouble because we're friends with these people. But I think it breaks up everything. But look, I'm with you. I want to know who am I, who am I gambling on? Who am I putting in my fantasy lineup? And that's it. I'm sorry. I would much rather have 15 minutes of somebody with a toupee. It's just like, there's a lot of action on the Rams right now. A lot of action. I don't understand it. The lines move. I just talked to my dude in bally's like that's all i want just give me like seedier people not not like awesome skype things i feel bad for our friends though because they have to have these like gregarious interviews but it's like i don't what revelations come out of
Starting point is 00:58:17 them no it's like uh coach cowher's gonna talk to kevin stefanski oh coach You must be proud of your guys Right It's like Like why? Anyway If Jimmy Johnson Is interviewing Jerry Jones It's different right? I think Bradshaw Sat with Ben Roethlisberger Earlier in the year
Starting point is 00:58:32 And they didn't have A great relationship Over the years And they patched it up And that was Something but Yeah I You're not gonna
Starting point is 00:58:40 They do it now NBA has now Borrowed the model And they did the same thing With the NBA Like LeBron It must have been so sweet to get that title in the bubble.
Starting point is 00:58:49 Oh, it was. It was. It was really sweet. But you know, you just want to get another one. They go and it's like five minutes. It's like nothing's happening. I'm learning nothing. I'm getting dumber in the moment.
Starting point is 00:59:00 All right, next game. Chiefs-Bills. I can't believe this is the late game. You really threw me off with that. I couldn't believe it either, but it is on a rotating thing. Has to be. I'm going to stay with this.
Starting point is 00:59:14 I have Chiefs by three and a half. All right, that's what I had. I figured it's three and a half either way, right? If it's Henny, it's three and a half for the Bills. Well, it's not going to be Henny. Mahomes will play. No, I know, but I'm saying I think it was a 7 point. I thought Mahomes was worth
Starting point is 00:59:28 7, right? Bills favored by 3.5 or Chiefs favored by 3.5. That's where I landed on. I think Bills would be 4.5, to be honest. You would? Oh, really? Yeah, Henny's not good. He's not good at football. So, 8 point difference, you say.
Starting point is 00:59:43 We're both right at 3.5. Well, because it's minus 3. So eight point difference, you say. We're both right at three and a half. Well, because it's minus three. So we tie there. Oh, so you win the week. Yeah. You made me feel comfortable on text when Henny was in and I looked up his number and I freaked out. Five for 22 and you were like, he's still got a lot of weapons.
Starting point is 00:59:59 That's it. I was like, two big plays. Just make two plays. He's got Tyreek. He's got Kelsey. Hardman's kind of fast. Oh, believe me. I broke everything in my office after he threw that pick,
Starting point is 01:00:10 but I wasn't going to give it up on text. What are the storylines? You like doing storylines, right? Best Super Bowl storylines? Yeah, let's do most fun Super Bowl. Yeah. Okay. So here are the scenarios.
Starting point is 01:00:28 I mean, we should probably power rank these, right? It's only four. Yeah. See, it's tough because how do you value the chiefs are the league's marquee team because of my homes,
Starting point is 01:00:40 but the bills would be the marquee story if they got in there and they were one away with that, with their fucking history. And I think that's the sexiest of the four. So I would say, I think Bill's Tampa is the, is the best Superbowl. I think it's the sexiest Superbowl.
Starting point is 01:00:56 Really? I do. Bill's Tampa. Yeah. Bill's Tampa. Great. Brady going for number seven. Everyone gets to pile on Belichick for two weeks.
Starting point is 01:01:05 Have Belichick versus Brady. All those conversations. Can Brady do it? Bruce Arians is a character. All this stuff. And then the Bill side, they've never been here. Oh, my God. This would be one of the most amazing.
Starting point is 01:01:18 These fans, they've been suffering. You could do your whole thing about that young man, Josh Allen. Yeah. I don't know what's going through that young man's mind right now but he has got to be I don't know Buffalo's been destroyed by Brady for two decades so you have the AFC East baggage
Starting point is 01:01:35 you have oh my god the Bills they finally get Brady out of their division and now all of a sudden they got to go through them again for the Super Bowl I think that's the biggest Superbowl. That's bills. The bills have to be the team from the, from an interest standpoint.
Starting point is 01:01:49 We just saw, we've seen the chiefs for years. I'd like to find out. I don't know if there's chiefs fatigue just yet. I think NBC, if you ask NBC executives, wouldn't they want green Bay, Kansas city.
Starting point is 01:02:00 You think they want Brady back? I guess Brady. Now you got me thinking. 100% Brady. Green Bay, Kansas City is Super Bowl I. You got the number one MVP against the number two MVP voting-wise. Well, for the league,
Starting point is 01:02:15 the best scenario is the Bills making it because then they can create, then Allen could become a superstar potentially. Right. He's not there yet. He doesn't have the name value Mahomes has. But if the Bills win the Super Bowl, Allen's in the State Farm commercials next year
Starting point is 01:02:29 and he's doing Heineken and whatever. He's getting six. I guess. Was Jimmy G? I mean, he didn't win the Super Bowl, but I didn't feel like he was going to get that boost if they had held on to the 10-point lead. Come on, Allen's way better than Jimmy G, though.
Starting point is 01:02:41 I know he is now. But even Green Bay Buffalo, you got small town. You can make a case those are the best fans, right? You want Brady in there, though. You need Brady in there. Wow, I hadn't thought of it this way. I thought for sure
Starting point is 01:02:54 it was just Green Bay, Kansas City. Oh, I think Brady winning a Super Bowl not on the Patriots and going for his seventh Super Bowl versus the Bills trying to win a Super Bowl. How is there a bigger storyline than that? If Casey wins again, they won last year. If Rogers wins again, he won 10 years ago.
Starting point is 01:03:11 So, Tampa Bay Buffalo is better than Tampa Bay Kansas City? Yeah. For me, it is. Oh, for you. Okay. Probably Mahomes Brady might be the one that reaches the most people.
Starting point is 01:03:26 But I don't know. Maybe I value the Bills thing more than you. Yeah, maybe. There's three teams left. The Bills, the Browns, and the Vikings. That if they're in the Super Bowl, it's more meaningful because of their history. Those are the three. I guess.
Starting point is 01:03:42 You might be able to throw the Seahawks in there. Oh, no. The Seahawks won already. You're being the three. I guess. You might be able to throw the Seahawks in there. Oh, no. The Seahawks won already. You're being more sentimental than I am. I just want to see I just want to see Rodgers and Mahomes,
Starting point is 01:03:51 but but like I said, we're good. As long as the Browns So what's the worst Super Bowl? Well, there's no bad one, but but I had your best
Starting point is 01:04:01 as my worst. Wow. Yeah. I value the Bills anymore. So you think Rodgers-Mahomes, the State Farm Super Bowl, that's the most fun one? Yeah, I think so. Could do a lot with the history of Super Bowl I.
Starting point is 01:04:16 Like I said, you're not going to do better than the top two. They traded off who's first MVP voter vote-wise all year long. What coach used to know Andy Reid in some way where we can get the photo of them on a coaching staff 20 years ago? Eric Bien-Ami. Matt LaFleur. Matt LaFleur, he met Andy Reid at an Amtrak station once, and here's a photo of that.
Starting point is 01:04:41 I would be like, Eric Bien-Ami, you're inexplicably going to be left without a head coaching job for the seventh straight year. What do you have to say? That's what I would ask. Yeah. Eric, the enemy,
Starting point is 01:04:52 you just called the chat handing to Tyreek. I'm assuming he called that play. That was like the play of the year. That should have gotten him a job. Yeah. Instead, he's going to get this stupid Houston job. Oh yeah.
Starting point is 01:05:02 If he, if he has anything, the way Schefter tweeted today, that was the worst coaching vacancy in a long time or whatever he said. Houston job. Oh, yeah. If he has anything, Schefter tweeted today that was the worst coaching vacancy in a long time or whatever he said. Houston is?
Starting point is 01:05:09 The most undesirable coaching vacancy because of all their dysfunction. For sure. They had this dude who was the team chaplain for the Patriots who now runs their whole team.
Starting point is 01:05:18 Yeah, and they hired like a PR firm and gave him hundreds and hundreds of thousands of dollars and didn't take their advice at all as to who should, which chapel guy they should hire.
Starting point is 01:05:28 You know, we should talk about Deshaun quickly. It seems like it's Jets or Dolphins. It seems like he's getting traded. All the signs are there like this will be a trade now. And the Jets have the second pick and then some other stuff.
Starting point is 01:05:47 And then the Dolphins have the 2-0, the fourth pick, the 17th pick, some other stuff. It's probably better for him if he goes to the Dolphins because they have a good team already. If you go to the Jets, it's like, all right, you're on the Jets
Starting point is 01:06:00 and they just traded all this stuff for you. But if you're the Texans and you get the second pick. You like Fields, right? You're a Fields guy? Yeah, sure. I like him. Do you like him more than Tua? I got to tell you,
Starting point is 01:06:15 there's a chance Tua was very good, but not great. I mean, you look at that Alabama offense the last few years, it's unbelievable the receivers they've produced. You know, between Ruggs and Cooper and Devontae Smith. You know, years, it's unbelievable the receivers they've produced. Between Ruggs and Cooper and Devontae Smith, it's phenomenal what they've done. I don't want to say it's a system offense, but we may have given Tua a little bit of a break here.
Starting point is 01:06:36 Plus, he's playing like he's playing off the injury, too. So, yeah, that's the move right there. So that's how I feel, too. Because the Dolphins, if they said 2-4-17 next year's yeah, that's the move right there. So that's how I feel too, because the dolphins, if they said two or four 17 next year's first, give us the Sean, but I could get the number two pick and I could take fields. And then maybe I get one more first from you. That's a pretty good reboot. Sure. If you're the Texans with the guy who's you've, you've basically burned every possible bridge with him and he doesn't want to be there anymore. And by the way,
Starting point is 01:07:05 um, he shouldn't want to be there anymore. This is, you know, this to me is the complete opposite of the James Harden situation. They, they did nothing but do wrong by this guy. And the, the clip of JJ Watt and him walking off the field and JJ Watt,
Starting point is 01:07:19 like, man, I'm sorry. Like him apologizing, like, man, you should never, you should be 11 and five every year or whatever he said. Like, that's how I feel about Him apologizing like, man, you should be 11-5 every year,
Starting point is 01:07:25 whatever he said. That's how I feel about Deshaun. Him and the Dolphins would be fun. Why not the Bears? You already passed on him, right, in the draft. What about all these teams that passed on him in the draft that still need a quarterback? Is that much egg on your face if you have to trade assets to get him?
Starting point is 01:07:42 I know we could have had him in the draft, but don't make the same mistake twice, right? Well, but I think from an asset standpoint, they can't give up as much. No, just one of the first two picks in this draft because you get a quarterback right away. Right. Or that 2 of 4 and 17 package.
Starting point is 01:08:00 Those are just going to beat anybody else's package. I have Patriot fans in my life who are like, 15, second round, third round, fourth round, Damien Harris, then next year's first. Hench and I were like, Belichick whiffs on two-thirds
Starting point is 01:08:18 of these first-round picks anyway. We might as well trade them off for Deshaun. We get a quarterback again. But if I'm Houston, I'm like, well, we're not going to be good this year anyway, even if we do take these high picks, like maybe we get like four ones from Chicago. I don't know.
Starting point is 01:08:33 But then if you still don't have the quarterback though. Yeah, I got it. Yeah. Cause if you're Houston, you still have to bring the guy over and be like, all right, I know you love Deshaun.
Starting point is 01:08:42 I know you bought his Jersey, but here's fields. You're going to love him. He's going to be really good. He's our new guy. You got to get everyone excited for somebody. Or Tua, who, you know, you just have to tell your fans not to watch his last five games on the Dolphins.
Starting point is 01:08:56 Yeah, right. Hey, watch that Cardinals game. Your team has no chance at Deshaun, right? It would seem like the most Jerry move ever to jump in. That would be fun, but I'd be shocked if Dak wasn't there. Especially with the Kellen Moore stuff going on. I think he's coming back.
Starting point is 01:09:12 Your first CD. Your first. Next year's first. Three firsts. No? Nah. They won't do it. We don't even have a GM that could comprehend what the hell that means. Do you really not have a gm not really no why would we have a gm oh we forgot before we go to parent corner we forgot to figure out how i hedge this how do i hedge my my all right so if
Starting point is 01:09:39 one of them wins you're done right so if the we're starting off with the Packers buck so if the Packers win that that thing's done so the Packers are minus 205 so you could put like a grand to win 500. Yeah, so
Starting point is 01:09:55 so Chiefs Packers money line is plus 144. Right? Yep. Right. So if I just bet that
Starting point is 01:10:04 for half of what I would win with my bet, the Packers lose my bet still alive. And then it, it moves over to the chiefs game. And then I win my bet. Isn't that how I have to do it? Yeah, you have to do it.
Starting point is 01:10:19 Yeah. Yeah. That's yeah. Because, uh, that's, it's staring you right in the face there with two favorites winning. Right?
Starting point is 01:10:25 Yeah, you have both underdogs. Oh, wait. So how I would get screwed is the Packers screw my parlay, and then the Bills win, and I lose both. That's how I get screwed. Right, right. If Chiefs Bucks win. Can you discuss this with the trifecta on against all odds?
Starting point is 01:10:42 Can you break this down? Can I come on? Can I invite myself on? Yeah, we'll get it going. But I think you just have to take the three combinations that get you money back, right? There's some way to do this.
Starting point is 01:10:56 We're just not smart enough. You think Harry's smart enough to figure this out? I want to come on against all odds. I want to talk about LeBron for MVP and I want Harry to figure out how to hedge this bet. All right, good. That'd be two things. All right, now it's time for parent corner brought to you by CarMax. Don't just buy your next car. Love your next car with CarMax. Love your car guarantee.
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Starting point is 01:11:37 It's the new Love Your Car guarantee from CarMax. Learn more today at CarMax.com. All right, I have an awesome parent corner this week, but you go first you do mine's not that great it's just a continuation of last week remember i bragged to you about how i was going to get atari i saw it online for 54 dollars yeah um and it had all the games i was like this is great i don't even know what to expect here so we get it comes in a box like a little bigger than a shoe box um it's got the console and it's got the two joysticks.
Starting point is 01:12:08 Remember, it's one red button and then just that little stick. And there are two of those. And then you just stick an HDMI into there and you have all the Atari games. I was like, this is the best. And I have my oldest down there. I was like, look, this is Space Invaders. And it is. I don't even know how to explain it it's so shitty it's so damn shitty speed bump bump bump up and it's slow and the
Starting point is 01:12:34 music is slow and the graphics are awful and then we do asteroids and that's boring as hell and the kids like and my oldest like all right that that's fine i'm like no no let's do this this is great so then archie leaves and i get the youngest one in there. I'm like, all right, I got a seven-year-old. He's going to love this. It's a visual. It's great. We put this game adventure. I don't know if you remember adventure. There's like a unicorn hopping up and down. It's terrible. And then there's, they have the bat, the sports games. He's like, well, let's play basketball. And then the basketball was like a little like line and that jumps up and down and something that looks like a hoop. Like the people who wrote these games are like, oh, we got it. Let's go. We're ready to print.
Starting point is 01:13:15 Like they ought to be ashamed of themselves. And then I'm like getting mad. Like I'm getting like, no, no, no. You should love this. You love it. And I'm like, all right, my middle kid's going to be fine. He likes everything. He gave it the little least amount of time, my middle guy, Jack. And now I'm yelling at them and I'm like, now I'm going the other way. I'm like, you guys ought to, you better appreciate what you have. Cause look at me, look what I had to deal with. This was it. This is all we had to play with. So they're like, yeah, you've lost your mind, old man. We'll teach us. We'll show you some real video games. Just let the Atari thing go.
Starting point is 01:13:46 I don't know what the answer is. Like, what would you even, I'm trying to think what would pique their interest even for a minute. I think you have to start with Sega, right? I think you have to do Sega Genesis 2, like the 93, 94 range with the hockey game, the golf game.
Starting point is 01:14:00 Right. Whatever Madden, like 95, when you could intentionally injure the guys and knock the guys out of the game, that was amazing. That was fun. Summerall was like, uh-oh, there's a man down. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:14:12 Right, right. Those were great. I think 92, it kicks in. They do it with swingers, right? On swingers, they play hockey. Like, oh, I'm going to make his head bleed. That was fun. But anything before that, oh my God, Simon,
Starting point is 01:14:22 you wouldn't go crazy. Combat, missile command, it's all such garbage. I couldn't even get my wife, who was familiar with the game. She's like, no, I don't even want to see it. It's dumb. But anyway. Tecmo Bowl. Yes. I haven't played that one in a while. I don't know. That would be the cutoff line for me. I don't know if that one's still fun
Starting point is 01:14:37 or not. We got to try that out. Bo Jackson. Well, I'm sorry. More importantly, probably made you feel super old. Oh, for sure. Way too old. It's like just an ego blow. I mean, these games we've been playing, Gus and I were talking about it,
Starting point is 01:14:53 I've been playing video games for almost 40 years now. I think I got Intellivision in 1981. Yeah, you're right. I think I have a 40-year video game. That's what it was. Well, if anyone wants Atari, I'll ship it to you for free. I can't even look at it anymore. So my parent corner, my son, who's been on this a million times,
Starting point is 01:15:09 my son's new thing is how he wants to be on the podcast or have a podcast. Okay. And it's because Zoe's been on some, but Zoe's actually good. She's genuinely talented at it and can hang with adults and she's good at it and has things to say. And with her, it's like you're, you're 13. So the, the move I've made has been, you have to change how you behave and talk in the house. And at some point in life, when, when we're not listening, you swear at your friends when you're playing video games with
Starting point is 01:15:41 them and you're storming off and all this stuff you do is like a temperamental 13 year old boy, when you're more mature and you can carry conversations, we'll revisit it. By the way, he's not coming on the podcast. Um, so he was really mad. He's like,
Starting point is 01:15:55 everybody's against me. You guys like Zoe more. We went through this whole thing, which hasn't really happened that often where it's like, you like Zoe more, even, even people, even my friends say, and she comes on your podcast, but you wouldn't have me. And I'm like, you like Zoe more, even, even people, even my friends say,
Starting point is 01:16:05 and she comes on your podcast, but you wouldn't have me. And I'm like, that's not a sign of my love. Like that Zoe came on to talk about teen culture. It doesn't mean I like her more than you. Well, then why can't I come on?
Starting point is 01:16:15 He's logging more minutes. He's not coming on, but he's logging more minutes of stories about him or way more. So that was his case. He's like, I parent corner. I'm in most of them. Zoe's not in any of them.
Starting point is 01:16:26 And yet I, and it's just like, you're insane. So we were having this whole week with him where he was just basically the world's against me. Friday night, Murph the puppy takes a shit in Zoe's room. Good. Stinks. Stinks. Zoe lights all these candles to get rid of the smell. Zoe has a music lesson and goes downstairs and forgets that one of the candles is going.
Starting point is 01:16:54 Oh no. Ben walks by her room and notices there's a ball of fire starting to go up her wall, freaks out, goes, grabs water and puts out this fire. And it was like, we were looking at it. It was like one more minute and our house might've been on fire. Like literally our house would have been on fire. Wait, did the candle fall or what? No, the candle just burned to the bottom. And for somehow the flame went up and it caught something on the side.
Starting point is 01:17:24 And all of a sudden on the side, this curtain on the side and all of a sudden this curtain on the side of the wall caught on fire and we were off. And so Ben saves the day and then could not have been prouder of himself. He was humble.
Starting point is 01:17:38 Why don't you tell that story in Parent Corner? How Zoe almost burned the house down and then I saved the day. Why don't you put that story in Parent Corner? There you go. And was all proud of himself and now we call zoe the arsonist and and uh and ben's the hero of the house that's great but then he's like i want to come on parent corner and tell the story about no you're not you're not coming on i'll actually tell the story for you why won't he go to the avamond? It's his big moment. No, screw him. So Zoe almost burned the house down.
Starting point is 01:18:10 The apple of my eye. The good kid. Good kid. Be careful. Just be careful. Everything would have been gone. The nice kid. So yeah, so Ben saved the day. Well, I am going to reward young Ben.
Starting point is 01:18:21 You don't have to, but I'm going to reward him with a nice new Atari. Not even 5200, just a regular Atari. I'm going to reward young Ben. You don't have to, but I'm going to reward him with a nice new Atari. Not even 5,200, just a regular Atari. I'm going to drive it over. That's true. Maybe I should get him an Atari. Yeah, get him an Atari. To help him out.
Starting point is 01:18:34 All right. That was Parent Corner brought to you by CarMax. Don't just buy your next car. Love your next car with CarMax. Love your car guarantee. Check them out today at CarMax.com. Before we go, big news. Kyle moved. He them out today at CarMax.com. Before we go, big news.
Starting point is 01:18:45 Kyle moved. He did. Kyle has an apartment. Look, he's got like a little office now. It looks good. Yeah. He's got digs. There's air conditioning.
Starting point is 01:18:56 Central air. He's near a 7-Eleven. Really? Yeah, there's shit going down with Kyle. It's big. We're really proud of him. Him and Ben. Very proud week for the Simmons family.
Starting point is 01:19:06 The big question is how many rabbits followed you? Did you take all the rabbits? Yeah. All of them. You took all the rabbits. You couldn't even get rid of the rabbits after we did the Paracordor story? It's not about...
Starting point is 01:19:21 They don't listen to the podcast, Bill. Yeah, they don't. It's more complicated than i thought people would want to adopt the rabbits after that oh i see they do they do but that's you're too close to them now i see this all the time people complain about their pets and they hate them they hate them and then when the push comes to shove they can't separate themselves kyle's living kyle's living with his girlfriend Sal There's no going back now I guess not
Starting point is 01:19:46 Once you're paying rent together It's tough It's tough How much more is this rent Than the last place? It's like a hundred bucks more Really? My rent was going to inevitably go up
Starting point is 01:19:55 So it just made sense It's shiny and new And there's a balcony It looks good There's a balcony There's a 7-Eleven There's a pizza place It's just great
Starting point is 01:20:03 Things are looking up in 2021. New president coming. Hopefully we won't have a civil war this week. That would be nice. Four great possible Super Bowl matchups. Worst comes to worst, you toss the rabbits off the balcony. You're in good shape here. That's true.
Starting point is 01:20:21 Second story. You could say the rabbits crawled off the balcony and you didn't realize what happened and they just they just kind of fell well she can hear all this from the other room so put them in zoe's room they'll burn up and put them in the arsonist room all right thanks for that up there kyle sat with a bug uh oh you can't lose them all my book book comes out, like out, out next week. It's still for pre-order. I know I was told that my publisher was like,
Starting point is 01:20:51 hey, you got to push this thing. I'm like, all right, but it's not out till the 26th. Tomorrow's what, the 18th? How, why don't I have a copy of this book yet? You were waving a copy on Instagram. Why didn't they mail me one? They should have mailed you one. I have like 20 here.
Starting point is 01:21:04 I can give you one. But yeah, that's it. You can't lose them all. Amazon.com or Barnes and Noble. Get its number one on addiction and recovery section. I did not mean for that to happen, but somehow it's, I don't know if it has any competition, but number one in the addiction, but not recovery. Yeah. Right. Also you hired Kendrick Perkins. Kendrick Perkins is on a podcast. You hired a Celtic for your podcast. I was like, how can I get Bill mad? I'm a higher Celtic. Yeah. Kevin is next perk and Gina Paradiso. They do the betting Academy on a yeah. On the extra points podcast network. How dare you hire a Boston athlete, not even tell me?
Starting point is 01:21:45 I need someone who knows about basketball and can talk about it. Why don't you hire a New York athlete? You got everybody else. There's no former Knicks. Why do you have to hire a Celtic? Oh, that's true. Yeah. It's bullshit.
Starting point is 01:21:56 Is John Starks around? I protest. That's it. All right, Sal. As always, a pleasure. Good job by you. Good job by you, buddy. All right, that's it for the pod.
Starting point is 01:22:05 Don't forget about the Rewatchables First Blood coming on Monday with Brian Koppelman. And then I got two more podcasts coming on this feed this week as well, including the good luck charm, Peter Schrager. Now he has to come back. Every time he comes on, we win money. So that'll be Thursday.
Starting point is 01:22:21 I'll figure out what else is going on next week as well. Stay safe. For the love of God, else is going on next week as well. Stay safe. For the love of God, stay safe over these next couple of days. And hopefully I'll see you Tuesday night. I don't have feelings within On the wayside On the first side of the road I don't have feelings within

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