The Bill Simmons Podcast - The Jets Win! (No!!!) Plus: MVP Watch, Hurts vs. Murray, and the Parlay Murderer With Cousin Sal and Sean Fennessey

Episode Date: December 21, 2020

The Ringer's Bill Simmons is joined by Cousin Sal and Sean Fennessey to briefly discuss the Jets' win over the Rams, possibly ruining their "Tank for Trevor" campaign (2:30) before Bill and Sal recap the rest of NFL Week 15, including: Jalen Hurts's impressive showing in the Eagles' loss to the Cardinals, 49ers-Cowboys, the Chiefs' win over the Saints, Patriots-Dolphins, the MVP discussion, an early look at the playoff picture, cross-off teams, and more (26:00). Then they guess the NFL lines for Week 16 (1:07:00) before closing the show with Parent Corner (1:29:00). Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Coming up, we're going to try to figure out why the Jets are one of the most soul-sucking franchises in all of professional sports. And we'll talk a little football too. That's next. This episode is brought to you by my old friend, Miller Lite. I've been a big fan of Miller Lite, man, since college days when I was allowed to have beer. I think nephew Kyle is a fan too. Miller Lite keeps it simple for us. Undebatable quality, great taste. Picture this. It's game day. All the gang's here. You're tailgating outside the stadium. It's a great time for beer. Or how about when you're standing at the grill and the smell of sizzling burgers is in the air? Moments like that. Or when you want a light beer that tastes

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Hadn't seen that one probably for a couple of years. It's really, really good. So that's Tuesday night. My podcast, which normally goes up Tuesday night, is actually going up a day early, Monday night. So you're getting a double header with me. You're getting me tonight and you're getting me Monday night, the annual Over-Unders podcast with me and House and Rosillo. We're going to be guessing the Over-Unders for every win total in the 72-game NBA season.

There's winning percentages that you can bet on this year. It's really confusing. House is going to be just dumbfounded the entire time. But that will be going up overnight on Monday night. So you have this podcast on the overnight Monday night, and then I have another one going up Friday. Yeah. Doing three this week. Why not? Happy holidays. Where am I going? I'm stuck in my house with a puppy who's torturing me. Anyway, coming up because it's out and Sean Sean Fantasy, special guests first, 8.15 Sunday night. Cousin Salas here, as always, for Guest Alliance and some other stuff. We rarely do this.

We rarely have a guest joining us at the top of Guest Alliance. I think it's only happened a handful of times in the history of this podcast. It usually happens only if someone wins a contest or something. And in a way, Sean won a contest. In a way. He won the I'm Fuck contest. Sean Fantasy is here. We've been working together at The Ringer since day one.

We used to work together at Grantland. He is a Jets, Mets, Knicks fan. In other words, he just needs therapy all the time. Today was the day he's been fearing for weeks. The Jets screwing it up. The Jets have Trevor Lawrence on a silver platter. He was waiting for them to screw it up. It happened today. Sean, walk us through your emotions. Sal, Bill, it's very nice to see you guys. Thank you for having me here at my own funeral. I'm very excited about this. It's the worst day in Jets history. I'm in an extraordinary amount of sincere pain,

and I don't know how to process it. I'll just very quickly tell you how my afternoon went. One, I'm in the playoffs for my fantasy football team. And in the playoff round, I have Kyler Murray, and I was facing off against somebody who picked up Jalen Hurts on the waiver wire and started him a quarterback. And we basically had a one-to-one showdown to end my fantasy football matchup. So I spent more time watching the Arizona Philly game today than I did the Jets game because I had a feeling that the Jets were going to screw things up and I didn't want to be too close to it. And then they actually did screw things up. And the fourth quarter is the worst I've felt throughout all of 2020. And this has been the worst year in my reported life.

Come on. Oh, my God. I feel like absolute shit right now. I have been waiting my whole life to root for a Trevor Lawrence type figure my whole life. And I'm now I'm not going to get it because of this fucking team. And I'm pissed. Sal, I have some Jets fans in my life. And I'm, I'm now I'm not going to get it because of this fucking team. And I'm pissed. Sal, I have some Jets fans in my life and I know you do too. I think what people miss with the Jets fans, because they usually are also tied to the Mets and Knicks. So they're, they're usually

screwed up anyway, but they have had success over the years, right? They, they did like with Parcells, they won a couple of games. Vinny Testaverde almost made the Super Bowl. The part that people miss is that they've never really had an awesome Jet since Joe Namath, who was 100 years ago. They're not a fun franchise. That was the killer with the Trevor Lawrence thing, right? Here's what scared me. I grew up probably six minutes from Sean, and I could have easily been a Jets fan.

Like you said, my father rooted for the Jets, and he made the mistake of going on a business trip and bringing home a Dallas Cowboys jacket when he went to Dallas. He could have easily been rerouted to Kansas City, and I would have been a Chiefs fan or whatever, but I like the shiny jacket. And then for the last 35 years, he's been trying to convince me to be a Jets fan.

Richard Todd, Rich Kotite, all these guys, all these losers, Bruce Coslett and everything. I feel for you, but first of all, I don't even know if it's better to be a Cowboys fan or a Jets fan. Bill, the way you explain it is interesting. There hasn't been a great Jet to root for, but is it possible that you're making too much of this? Justin Fields didn't light it up against Northwestern,

but he could be maybe as good as Trevor Lawrence, and that's your quarterback? Or is it just fun to hate the Jets? Sean's going to start crying. Let's put this in context. This is really important, right? We had a year like this a few years ago. The Jets drafted Sam Darnold to be their quarterback.

That same year, Baker Mayfield and Lamar Jackson and Josh Allen were in the same draft. All three of those guys are now leading double-digit win teams to the playoffs. And my quarterback sucks. And the Jets are an incompetent franchise. And they don't know how to manage these situations. Help me understand this because you guys know a lot more about football than I do. And you talk about it every week.

Tanking in football seems to be verboten for a very specific reason, which is that a general manager can't tell a coach to lose, or he can't force a coach to sit players. I have no idea why anything resembling a quality football player played for the jets today, or we'll play for the rest of the season. You can't, you can't explain it to me.

There's no logical reason. The only way to become a great franchise is to draft an elite quarterback. Look at the Packers. Look at your Jets. Excuse me. Look at your Patriots, Bill. Look at the great teams over the years. They have stable, beautiful, wonderful, special quarterbacks.

I just want to know what that feels like. I do, too. I don't know what to say. You didn't have Greg Williams. You fired the wrong guy. You didn't have Greg Williams. You fired the wrong guy. You didn't have Greg Williams to blow it. You were ready to blow it. They self-sabotaged the Rams. Cam Akers was breaking off 25-yard runs, and they were getting called for holding. It was right in their lap. It was a typical Jet. By the way, the Jets have scored first in eight of their 14 games,

just enough to show everybody, all right, we could maybe compete a little bit. We just want to wet your beak a little bit. But rest assured, in the fourth quarter, we won't be around. And they were still trying to not be around. Those penalties killed the Rams. I can't believe what I saw out of the Rams either. I don't know what to say to you.

I apologize. I'm sorry. I had the Rams in a 13-point tease with three other teams that covered and had them down to four. And I just kept expecting them to flip the switch. We should mention it was the biggest NFL upset in 25 years. Yes,

it was. Yeah. There has been five games since the schedule expanded in 1978 that had a 17 point or more underdog actually win the game outright. It happened last year with the dolphins against the Patriots, right? It happened with the Baltimore Colts in 1978 against my Patriots. And it happened with the, uh, then Redskins over the Cowboys in 1992, the watt now the Washington professional football team, and then the jets again over the bills. So the jets have somehow been involved multiple times here.

I think what made this one crazy is it felt like it was in the right hands. Right. The Rams were coming back. It was all going to be good. They were going to do it. And for whatever reason, Goff, he has these games where it seems like his girlfriend dumped him an hour before the game and you can see it immediately and it's

like, how is this your performance against the Jets? You guys are trying to win the NFC West. The game was looking exactly like the game against your Patriots and the game against the Raiders in which the Jets had taken leads and it seemed like they had things in hand, but also they were also seemed to be purposefully tanking where they

were kind of allowing teams to score in the fourth quarter. And they seem to be allowing the Rams to move down the field in the fourth quarter. And then on this final possession, the Rams scored a touchdown, which was called back for a penalty.

And then they had a third and four from about the 42. And Sean McVay called two 30-yard passes. Right. Two guys who weren't good receivers. It was to like a running back. It was Gerald Everett.

And Gerald Everett. Because I needed him to score. Right. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. It was like a wheel route. The Jets have one credible player

in their secondary on the whole team. His name's Marcus May. He's awesome. And of course, Jared Goff on fourth and four is throwing right at Marcus May like a tool.

Fuck Jared Goff. Fuck Sean McVay. Fuck Adam Gase. I cannot believe this happened. To Sean's point, I will say, and you talk about like tanking and he shouldn't have put a team that even resembled anything that looked like an NFL squad out there. I think it's easier to tank even if you have first ringers in offensively, right? You could run shitty play calls.

A couple of what you just mentioned, like the Rams ran, but defensively and in defense of golf, only just a little bit. I promise they were in his throat, like the whole game. They were right up in his face. He really, you know, obviously he should get, he should be, have the field awareness to get rid of the ball better than he does at this stage in the game. But he didn't have a chance a lot in that early going going on. So I don't know. You almost did it right, buddy. You really almost did. It was like four minutes. You didn't play

well. The most painful part of this, the whole thing is that this actually isn't an 0 and 16 team. The Jets are actually not this bad. It's easy to say Lowell Jets. They're a joke. Lowell Mets, Lowell Knicks. All these teams are terrible, but this jet team actually has five to six really quality players. And I really liked Joe Douglas, their general manager. And I felt really strongly. Like if they got Trevor Lawrence, weirdly, they would have been on the right path, even coming off of an 0-16 season. And now I don't know what to do. I'm disappointed because the most fun outcome would have been the Jets getting Trevor Lawrence and then him refusing to go.

And then the Jets fans doing the whole, you think you're better than me? So you asked about the tanking thing. Not to, as you know, part of my goal with this podcast is to always swing it back to a Boston team, but I really do have first hand experience. Oh, good. 1992, the year heading into the blood cell draft. I was living in Boston that year and we were terrible. It was Dick McPherson was a coach. We had nobody good. We lost to Seattle early,

early in the season. So we actually had, we had the, uh, the tiebreaker if we ended up tying. So we're tied with them headed down the stretch. Do you guys know who Jeff Carlson is? Have you ever heard that name? No. I don't think so. Jeff Carlson was the guy the Patriots started at QB the last two games. Really? And he went 28 for 59 combined for 279 yards, three picks, no TDs. He finished his career 0-3 as a starter, lost two of the three games in this stretch. But we lost an overtime game in Week 17 to Miami that I watched at my dad's house,

and we were having a stroke because it was the same situation you were in today. We were watching Bledsoe in college. We were ready for Bledsoe. And then Miami ended up winning in overtime, and it was like, wow, the Jeff Carlson thing. So here's my point. I know you hate Sam Darnold, but he's actually can be competent from time to time. It was time to send Sam packing a week ago. He shouldn't have seen these last

three weeks. Why did they do that? I don't, they actually really did so wrong by him through his whole tenure too. Like they screwed him over and now we're going to remember him as the guy who screwed us over. Like it's, it's really, it's karmically brutal in every direction. Cause he isn't the quarterback of the future. He's a nice kid. He's still really young. He's 23 years old, but there's so much baggage now. And whenever people see him, they're going to see the ghost of Trevor Lawrence. It's, it's terrible. Let me ask you this. I know it's terrible, but what about this? Let's say you go 0-16 and you draft Trevor Lawrence and he's capable. He gets you to the playoffs a bunch, wins a couple of playoff games, never to the Super Bowl, whatever, but really good, respectable. You're not hovering around three wins every year, right? So for the

next 10 years, it's good. But 20 years from now, you're like, hey, who are the winless teams in football? Like, oh, the Jets were. It really depends when in history you're looking at this or do you not care? You needed the next five or six or seven years. I mean, I was looking at those stats today because they were showing the winless teams of all time, right? Obviously, the two most recent ones are the Browns and the Lions.

Who cares? Who cares? What does that matter? If you're a Lions fan and 15 years ago your team went winless, okay. I mean, if I can go to the playoffs, I would be delighted. I would shed a tear. I'm dying to go to the playoffs in any sport right now. I'm just dying.

Horrible year. I need the Jets to figure this out. It has to start at the top. You're assuming they weren't going to take a guard from North Dakota State with the first pick anyway. There are all different ways they could have screwed this up. Well, this could get worse. Because

How so? Because they play the Patriots in week 17. Yeah, I know. The Patriots Gilmore is going to be out for the air. They haven't announced it yet, but he partially tore his quad, so we won't see him again. They have really like nobody left on defense other than a couple of decent guys. And then offensively, Kim is the worst quarterback I've, I've ever watched for an entire season.

I've seen worst quarterbacks for the pats for like short stretches, Jeff Carlson or cam Jeff Carlson. If he had been the whole year, he would have had the title. But I mean, some of the throws at halftime, Cam had seven incompletions and all seven were uncatchable. He was bouncing them. He was stealing them over heads. So anyway, I don't know what Belichick is capable in week 17, but knowing how much he hates the Jets

and knowing that it's an AFC East rival. Sean Fennessey, if you want to see tank rival. Sean Fantasy, if you want to see tanking in week 17, if you want to see how it's done, I'm actually excited to see what they're capable of because Cincinnati has two wins. The Jets have one. There is a world in which the Jets fall to the third pick

and then it becomes the R.J. Barrett thing all over again. Only if the Jets win two games though because the Bengals have a tie, which was one of the saving graces, which is the Bengals are 2-10-1. Oh, you're right. Against Philly. So you'd have to beat the Browns next week. Yes.

Yeah, just do that. Great. Cool. Yeah. Let's take the 18th pick or the 25th pick. What's the difference? They're never going to win anything anyway. Sal, how good is Fields? I think he's good. I don't think this weekend indicates what he's capable of, but you would

I don't know if it wasn't a Trevor Lawrence year, you'd be very excited to get Fields as your first quarterback. You're totally right. But every time someone says here are the comps for Trevor Lawrence Andrew Luck Aaron Rogers and John Elway. So the three most iconic generational quarterbacks.

Those are genuine comparisons I've read because I've been following this so closely. So yeah, it's terrible. I hope Justin Fields is a nice guy. Is there any chance the Jags do a, oh, you're going to screw this up? Watch this. I was watching them against the Ravens.

They really seem, they really seem locked into knowing what they want to do here with the blowing the pig. And by the way, I don't know. I've made jokes about Trevor Lawrence. Which one is he more excited about? The,

the Clemson win or the jets win today, this weekend, which, but I don't know, going to Jacksonville, is he going to be happier to go to Jacksonville? I guess they could have done something a few years ago, but as far as he's concerned,

what does it matter? Yeah, I don't... I think you lose both routes in that one, right? Yeah. I mean, the Jags play the Bears next week. Trubisky, you never know. Right.

Because Trubisky's also looked good for a couple weeks here. Right. And is paving the way now that they're 7-7. They have an outside shot at the playoffs. Right. And is paving the way now that they're 7-7, they have an outside shot at the playoffs. He's kind of paving the way

for the kick of the balls. So you got that maybe, Sean. I never imagined that they would beat, the Jets would beat the Rams. I was always hoping that we would get past this game and then there was an outside chance

that the Jags would beat the Bears and then we could go into the Belichick showdown at the end of the season, and it wouldn't matter. You could have kicked some dirt on us. Yes, that would have been a beautiful transition to the glorious days of the new Jets

as the Patriots fall. And instead, once again, I'm the schmuck. Do you feel like the Jets, either way, have to just part ways with Darnold because now he's a memory of this Trevor Lawrence game where he basically lost him. I mean, kind of. Like, they were already talking

about how they were going to have to trade him regardless. And you don't want to now extend a guy. I mean, he's having his worst season out of his three seasons he's played. He doesn't look good. He's lost his confidence.

He was a winning quarterback last year. Wasn't he 7-6 last year? Yeah, yeah. And when he played, they looked like a really solid team. I'd take him on the pats right now. Oh, yeah? Yeah, we could rebuild him.

Yeah, do a little Josh McDaniels. Nah, I'll give you a third-round pick. Josh McDaniels, Reclamation Project? I don't know. Wow, that would be truly haunting. Would you take Stidham in a third? I heard so much about Stidham in the preseason. Why haven't we seen him out there?

Cam Newton can't throw, Bill. I'm on multiple Pats fan threads where we're all asking, like, how bad is Stidham? Where Cam cannot complete a nine-yard pass and Belichick's like, should we put Stidham in? No.

What was Hench saying to that? He's like, Cam throws the ball like you would skimming a rock across a lake. Same motion. Hench said, yeah, he was like, number one ever, Montana Rice. Number 5,737th ever, Cam and Nikhil Harry. He was doing that bit.

Yeah, it's brutal. So with the Jets thing, there's no coming back. I mean, what do I do? What would you do if you were me? If you've been living through this your whole life, you've never gotten past the AFC championship game. The, the team is a, is a, is a living meme. I mean, they're just a total embarrassment and, and now it looks like they're going to

draft. Yeah. They'll draft a tackle or a cornerback now in the first round, or they'll trade down. Yeah. The trade down would be a good one. And then fields ends up being good. The thing with the Knicks, as you know, Sal, I'm an NBA hole.

I've been watching preseason. There's a pandemic. I have nowhere to go. I just have a puppy. I'm trapped home all day. We'll talk about it on Parent Court. Knicks fans love it. Obi Toppin and the point guard, they love it. This is their best week in years.

Toppin looks pretty good. But John Morant went up like three levels. Like that guy is one of the best 15 players in the league now. And people don't realize it yet because it's freaking preseason and only people in Memphis understand. But that guy is going to be a superstar, not just a star, like a superstar. And the Knicks, they were in that Zion

Ja draft where it was almost impossible for them not to get one of those two guys and end up with the third pick. To me, that's as big of a stomach punch as the Trevor Lawrence thing because it's really hard to find an NBA superstar, too. Jets should have drafted John Morant. I told you that.

Maybe that's who they should draft. It sounds like you haven't been crushing as much Quickly tape as I have because Quickly is looking beautiful on the Knicks right now. Right. Something's brewing there. Quickly, RJ, Mitch.

You know, RJ looks pretty good. I got to say, Sean, before we let you go, so you can drink cyanide. So I rented Tenet with my wife on Friday. Yeah, sure. Sean hosts, for people listening, Sean hosts our Big Picture podcast. You've probably heard him on the rewatchables with me

a kajillion times. My wife and I, she made Dark and Stormies. We had The Sleeping Puppy. Kids were, it was like, all right, a little like pseudo date night, even though every night's a date night because it's pandemic. 20 minutes in, she looks at me and she goes, can we watch something else? She's like, what's going, can you go to Wikipedia to tell me what's happening? I'm like,

I don't understand it either. I gave it another 10 minutes and I was like, I'll just watch this on my own. And here's what I don't like. And this is, this goes down to what, you know, where we, where we divert sometimes as movie lovers, the movie's obnoxious. It's intentionally confusing and it thinks it's better than you. It's like the, it's like the Good Will Hunting. You think you're better than me? The movie, the movie thinks it's better than the audience. And it's like, if you don't understand It's because you're not smart enough Or you're not watching closely enough It's one of those

And I'm just like You know what Fuck you Christopher Nolan I've been in your corner This whole time Don't make a movie Where that makes me feel Like an asshole

Or I'm not concentrating Hard enough It looks really cool But part of making a movie Is to have a plot That the audience can follow. Like, is that fucking hard? Your take, Sean.

Do you want me to respond as if I were Christopher Nolan? Like, what game is this? What are we playing? No, I know you kind of like the movie. I do. Very quickly.

Sal, did you see it? I have not seen it yet. No, I've heard someone who had about the same take as Bill. A lot of people hate it. I have historically been a little bit more down on Nolan movies than most people. I would say, particularly with this movie, I know this is an obnoxious thing to say, and I'm sorry.

Watch it a second time and tell me if you like it more. I bet you you will like it more. You deserve the Jets. That answer deserves the Jets. But I think that's what Nolan did. He's like, you're going to have to watch this movie five times, and then maybe I'll let you into my secret handshake club, and we can talk about it.

It's like, how about this? I just wanted to watch a movie on a Friday night. I don't know what's going on. Bullets are going backwards. I'm like, what the fuck is happening? It couldn't have been any worse than what I had to watch this afternoon, Bill. That's all I'm saying. That's true.

Bullets going backwards. The footballs We're going backwards Sam Darnold's throwing interceptions that are reversing In the air Alright Sean, what do you got on Big Picture this week? Thanks for having me on Bill We're talking about George Clooney The George Clooney Hall of Fame

Because he's got a new movie on Netflix We're talking about Wonder Woman 1984 It's a big week And then next week on The Rewatchables Sean and Van Lathan are breaking down Mr. Holland's opus. Oh, nice. And really getting to the bottom of what a horrible person Mr. Holland was. So you got that going

next week. Beautiful call. Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful call. Yeah. Just ready to ditch his family for a 17-year-old. It's just problematic. Sean, best of luck getting through this. Good luck with the Knicks and maybe the Jags will miraculously... Hang in there, pal.

Thanks, guys. I'm going to go get drunk. Bye. We're going to take a break. We'll be back in a second. This episode is brought to you by Movember. The mustache is back with a vengeance. Look at Travis Kelsey.

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Save big on electronics, fashion, and more this Prime Big Deal Days, October 8th and 9th. All right, we're back. You want to do like 20 minutes on Jeff Carlson or do we do enough Jeff Carlson? I want to do an hour and 20 minutes on Jeff. No, we can move on, I guess, from Jeff Carlson. Okay, good. Let's go with Eagles cards, game of the day. Yeah. This had the following subplots.

Kyler Murray and DeAndre Hopkins. Not only winning my fantasy league, and now you and I are head-to-head next week in our Keeper League finals. I feel like everybody who had Kyla Murray this week probably won. Yeah. I thought it was a pig. Cause I'm not sure. Every Tannehill was the other one who had a gigantic thing. And Josh Allen was good yesterday. Those are the big three.

If you had one of those three, you probably won your fantasy league. So you had that whole, you had the fantasy aspect, right? You had the Jalen Hurts. As Sean mentioned, people picking up Jalen Hurts, starting him. He's swinging fantasy leagues. But more importantly, I'm just a believer. I think he's legit good. I was really, really impressed with him today.

So he had that subplot. They're going back and forth. Super exciting game. Philly's about to take the lead. The guy drops the snap. Arizona comes down on Wednesday. The Eagles have a chance to come back. A couple Hail about to take the lead. The guy drops the snap. Arizona comes down and Wednesday, the Eagles have a chance to come back. A couple of Hail Marys almost get it. So this was an awesome game anyway. And then on top of everything else, our hero,

the hero 2020 needed, Aqib Talib, who was so much fun the last time, but was like kind of an SNL sketch crossword. I enjoying it. Right. He must have studied tape or something because I thought he was excellent today. I'm all in. Can we get him for Monday Night Football? Really? You are? I don't know. I can't tell if you're kidding. I can't tell if you're kidding.

I am not kidding. I'd love to keep to it. I saw the outfit. I don't know how these guys realize they don't need to dress up for this stuff. They don't have to dress like they were just drafted like on draft night or anything because they can wear a giant overcoat.

It's cold everywhere. No one's going to they could wear a giant overcoat it's cold everywhere no one's gonna question like all right it's arizona what we'll believe that it's 20 degrees he went all out he dressed up dressed in the nines he did he was better he was better than the first week but it was enjoyable every game every late afternoon game was enjoyable right rams game was great rams jets at least towards the end saints chiefs was intriguing i'm sure we'll talk about that. And this one, it was just, what was it, like 26-20 at half? There was no shortage of points. It was like a fantasy bonanza.

And Hurts, 338 and three touchdowns. It makes you think like, wow, that's the quarterback I want to see from the NFC East. I don't know if it's going to work out. Probably not. But out of the four, that's definitely the one I want to see taking snaps. But... Oh, yeah.

He's the number one draft pick. If you're picking quarterbacks now, because who knows? I'm sure Dak will be fine. But I'm even saying in the next couple of years, Jalen Hurts on a cheap salary, that's like the best kind of guy.

Now, granted, it's negated by the fact that they have to pay Wentz a kajillion dollars to get rid of him. Yeah, but it's nice if it makes sense at least, right? You's negated by the fact that they have to pay Wentz a kajillion dollars to get rid of him. Yeah, but it's nice if it makes sense, at least, right? You don't want to be in that middle area where it hurts. It's like, oh, we got to give him eight more games to see if this is even worth it. But then on the other side, Kyler Murray, we were like, what the hell? What's going on with him and Hopkins? They're good for like 55 yards a game,

maybe a goal line touchdown. And he just woke right the hell up. He's woke up and they want that seven seed. And now I'm excited to see them in the playoffs. Should they hold on? Well, you know, it's funny. He had such an awesome game and yet he threw a horrific interception in the, in the end zone that would have been another touchdown. Right. And you know, if they had just scored on that drive, the game's over, they would have been up two scores. And instead it gave Philly this sign of life. It was just a bad pass. Other than that, he was lights out. And he really seems like he's right.

He's basically the guy from four weeks ago. I don't know what happened to him during that stretch when he wasn't running around. But super exciting. Their defense, it's not great, but they have a habit of getting a big sack or a big tip or making some sort of play when they need it. The one thing I'm surprised about, I still don't love their running game. And it seems like in a lot of cases, they're always better if he just knows he's going to take off and he does it. But I don't know what's going on in that division anymore. Because if you had asked me 24 hours ago, I would have said like, it's gotta be the Rams

division to lose. The Rams had really good odds for the conference. And now you look at it, Seattle's in the driver's seat. Arizona is coming on and the Rams look like they're playing the worst at anybody. And you look at it and I was like, wow, the NFC really looks inferior today, this week. They really do. Forget about the Rams losing to the Jets. It seems like every AFC team beats the hell out of an NFC team. The Saints didn't look right. Seattle almost blew that game to Washington. We had 750,000 texts going about.

Haskins, what do they do with him? What is he going to be doing next year? Is he going to be working in a movie theater? Are movie theaters even going to be open? Shit, if he can't work in a movie theater, what's he going to do? We have no idea what's going to be with him. What is he going to be doing next year? Is he going to be working in a movie theater? Are movie theaters even going to be open? Shit, if he can't work in a movie theater, what's he going to do? We have no idea what's going to be with that. And who else? Green Bay almost didn't almost blow

that in control, but not a very impressive win. They kind of died. They did the classic Green Bay where they played well for two quarters and that was it. Then they held on. In the NFC, I won't be surprised if any of those teams we mentioned lose, loses in the first round. In the AFC,

there's about six teams that I will be surprised when they lose, right? Like the Browns, the Colts, the Ravens. I think they could all challenge the Chiefs

and I'm like, wow, that's going to be a tough out. Tennessee, all these teams. So, um, I was going to ask you this. Buffalo and Pittsburgh. What's a good segue?

How many teams in the AFC do you like more than every NFC team? A lot of them. So I'm going to go you this. Buffalo and Pittsburgh. What's a good segue? How many teams in the AFC do you like more than every NFC team? A lot of them. So I'm going to go. I'll give you Casey. Yes. Yeah. Do you like Pittsburgh more than every NFC team?

I need to see them get right a little bit. I want to see. Not that. Yeah, I'm going to say they will prove it. Yeah, I'm with you. I think that's a Buffalo. I do. The with you. I think that's incomplete. Buffalo, I do. The Colts, I think I do. Tennessee?

Tennessee. I got to tell you, these teams will slug it out. They will. They'll slug it out with anybody. You know? Like, they... We used to think... Back to the Chiefs for a second, right?

We used to think, like, the only way to beat the Chiefs is to limit their possessions and score 30 points. That's hard to do, right? To score 30 points and just grind the ball out. Like the Raiders figured it out once, almost twice. Now we've seen like four teams in a row. All right.

Maybe the Chiefs, like today was a different thing. They had 34 first downs to 15 first downs for the Saints. They had time of possession, 41 minutes to 19. And the Saints almost beat them. If they recover that ball in the end zone, they beat them. So I think the Chiefs could be in a little bit of trouble. I'm saying it here, week 15. I think they could be in a little bit of trouble come January. Well, you left out, they lost our guy Clyde. I think he's got to be out for the year, right? Yeah, for sure. And Le'Veon Bell, slow getting up. Like he's your number one guy now. Le'Veon Bell who cried about getting touches like, okay, now's your chance.

You're going to get more than you can handle probably. You know what? I was thinking about it today. Cause Damien Williams opted out, right? A bunch of guys opted out. He was one of the better ones, like Hightower and the Patriots, few of those. And I guess the caveat is you can't come back in once you opted out. But what if the Chiefs were like, hey, man, do we have Damian Williams? Like, what would happen? He's got to be sitting around watching all this. But I don't think Le'Veon has looked really that good at all. Like, I think he's like a backup, like a C-plus, right?

Yeah, he's serviceable. Does he feel explosive to you at all? No, I don't think so. He seems to, you know, it's so hard to tell what that team, right? Like if you're defensively, you're, you're paying attention to a million different things. So what was he? 15 for 62. I don't think they could expect a lot more out of them than, than something like that. Do you feel like he's, I mean, the old Le'Veon, it always felt like he was going to break one. Just different, just different. Any screen pass. He was terrified. I felt like he was going to break one. Just different. Just different style. Any screen pass, he was terrified. It felt like he was moving at

his own pace. And now he just seems like another running back. It's kind of like your guy Zeke. Oh, yeah. He'd stop in the hole. I mean, imagine that. We got a $90 million albatross. We got a guy maybe just as good in Pollard. And today we saw what happened. You didn't have

to feed Zeke Harry. You didn't have to worry about it. Forget about my team. It's a, that's a whole different. I thought I came away from your, I had your game on a lot. Cause I had most certain fantasy and then he ends up going out,

but I thought Pollard looked great. And he, he gave you real life at running back, which you did not have with Zeke Elliott, but it's crazy how these, these running backs just are done immediately. And I'm not saying done, like they can't be football players, but they go from, remember what happened to Chris Johnson in Tennessee? You have these guys that are,

they're like just transcendent week to week. And then the next week they're ordinary. And you're like, what happened? It's almost like with boxers where, where you watch this awesome boxer. And then all of a sudden the guy's not awesome anymore. What happened? You were awesome six months ago. Priest Holmes is on the cover of every fantasy football magazine and then he's out of the league 18 months later. Derek, we talked about this last week.

Derek Henry is single-handedly holding on to the big contract deal for the running backs in the future. Who else? The more you learn about that dude every time they run the piece about the big contract deal for the running backs in the future. Right. Like who else? Well, he might, the more you learn about that dude,

every time they run the piece about how he was like one of the great high school athletes ever. And then he was like just a complete beast in college. And he just might be one of those guys, you know, that he's just like a freak, you know, like the same way.

Uh, I don't know, Calvin Johnson, people like that, where, um, as long as they're in their prime or whatever, they're just going to be the exact same athletically the entire time. Or Randy Moss. I guess he had another one today.

He had that stiff arm. Oh, yeah. Just like this guy is the most physically imposing player in the league. He's a running back. Yeah. He's throwing guys around. He's not afraid of the cold at all. Yeah.

Yeah. I think, though, like back the Chiefs for a second. I think the Bills could beat the Chiefs in a slugfest. It's not anymore talking about limiting possessions and winning time of possession and all that stuff. It's like, okay, you want to score 45? We're going to score 47. I feel like the Bills have that.

Tennessee has that a little bit. And the Colts to a lesser extent, but they play a little defense. So it's going to be fun playoffs. I can't believe we got there. I think the weird thing to me about the Chiefs is that every single game they leave you wondering whether they were holding back. Right. And I don't think it's conceivable. I don't think it's conceivable for a football team to be holding back once we get to like December,

you know, it's a lot of games to just be playing correctly. Just exactly correctly. Denver and Oakland. Now the saints, all the, to just barely win these games like this, they have to be a little worried about it.

So I've liked the bills for a few weeks. Yeah. And thought last week was maybe the week they turned into a pumpkin, who knows? And if anything, they went the other way. And I doubled down, I bet on them in that Steelers game, but there was that 3% of me going like, oh, I could see them turning. They didn't. This week, same thing. They were awesome. I think the Bills are the team we think the Chiefs should be. And the difference

with the Chiefs is, like that play, Romo did a great job when they had the replay of it. Mahomes had that play where, I think it was in the first half, he scrambles out to the right. There's a guy coming at him. He sees the guy. He just kind of zags to the right.

And all of a sudden now he's going forward. He's hitting somebody with a frozen rope for like 25 yards. And Romo's doing the, Oh, Jim, watch this. And he's just, because Romo knows how hard and unrealistic it is. Right. And that's why we're all so afraid of the Chiefs

because at any point Mahomes can do something like that. And that's the thing nobody else has. But when you watch the Bills... And everyone's got Chiefs fantasy guys and it's fun to read for them. Yeah, I get it. The Bills, it's Diggs and it's Beasley. And otherwise, it's like, how the hell

is this happening when John Brown is out, right? But they have a... The thing I like about them, they almost surround me with a basketball team where they can play traditional. They they have a cut. The thing I like about them, they almost surround me of a basketball team where they can, they can play traditional. They'd have the running back behind, do whatever they can look that way. But then when they spread everyone out and basically no running back,

but Alan's the running back. And if you're the defense, you're like, all right, well, this guy is basically a running back. We got to be careful with him. But then they have all these receivers spread out all over the place.

And it just seems like they can get mismatches. It really is like watching basketball where they're like, Oh, Beasley's here. Oh, they're going to put the linebacker on him. Cool. And he's,

he's open for seven yards. I just think they're more efficient than the chiefs are right now. The chiefs should have put that game away today. The saints, the way breeze was playing, especially the first half, it was hitting the point where you're like, man, should they be playing Breeze?

Is he all right? How big is that flag jacket? I felt a little bad. Everyone's like, Breeze is done. He's done. He can't throw. It's like, all right. He just had a punctured lung and I didn't even know you had 37 ribs,

but he had like 11 broken ribs protecting his heart. Like maybe a little, I guess he went 0 for 5 before he completed his first pass. They got off to a bad start. But otherwise, that's what I'm saying. The numbers don't match up. Time of possession was 2.5-1 for the Chiefs. They should have won that game by 28.

They didn't. Well, they also, to get a safety instead of a touchdown. Now, you watch and you think, oh, I can't believe that guy didn't. That's a hard play to do the full sprint dive on a ball that's bounced around. But what they never do in that situation is he actually, his goal should be to keep the football in bounds. Because his momentum, he's going to,

it's going to be impossible to keep that in bounds. But it's almost like a punt on the one yard line. Right. It's a safety no matter what, right? If you bat it back three or four yards, it's going to be a safety no matter what. Make sure you cover that or someone on your team covers it.

If I'm a Saints fan, how do I feel about that game? Because I never truly felt like the Saints were going to win that game. We were texting constantly because you wouldn't let me bet on it. You were right. You were like, everybody's on the Chiefs. Chiefs minus three.

Why hasn't it moved? This is fishy. Chiefs end up pushing. So you're right. But House and I are texting you for two hours. Is it time? Is it time? Is it time?

Saints take the lead, and the Chiefs are still minus 150 to win the game. Was that what it was? Yeah, it never swung. I apologize. I know. I was so focused on money for me, my Rams parlay there, but that minus three

just did look fishy. And like you said, when, when nobody, you know, what is betting the saints, but it was a number one or two seed in the NFC. It's like, uh, they really just going to give away free money,

but that safety brought it back to a chiefs three point win. I don't know. You ask how I'd feel. You need Michael Thomas in that offense. You need Kamara. When is Kamara going to have his 200-yard games anymore? Like, I don't get – I'll give Breeze a break because it was first one back,

but I still don't think they know what they're doing with this Taysom Hill and Breeze stuff, and they had Daquan Smith go out. Receiver-wise, they're in a little bit of a bad shape coming up for the next couple weeks. Yeah, I think Sanders was somebody people thought was going to... Thomas is out. Oh, Sanders. It's like Sanders is like a number two or number three receiver.

He can't be your number one. We were texting about this yesterday. It feels like the fake MVP. Actually, let's talk about this. We'll take a break, then we'll talk about it. At Pennzoil, we have one job, pioneering a motor oil so advanced, you don't have to think about your motor oil. Instead, you can think about how your engine sounds, how your stomach feels as the RPMs build, how your wheels hug the curves, and how with the Pennzoil Platinum up to 15-year, 800,000 kilometer protection guarantee, your adventures will be with the Pennzoil Platinum up to 15 year, 800,000 kilometer

protection guarantee, your adventures will be many. Pennzoil, long may we drive. Available at your local Canadian tire. Enrollment required. Keep your receipts. Other conditions apply. See Pennzoil.ca slash warranty for full details. So we were texting yesterday about, is there going to be weird Rogers MVP momentum? Just cause this is right around the time people get bored. You could, the announcer Kurt Warner was announced in the game yesterday and did this. He was the first person that I'd heard even make the case like, Oh,

right now it's either Rogers or my homes. You almost need two votes. I'm like, what? It's my home. So he's like a minus 500 favorite. What are you talking about? Kurt Warner.

But he was like, you know, he's got 40 touchdowns and the team's playing well. Like, why isn't he the MVP? He's playing great. He's the focal point of the team. And I'm kind of listening. I'm like, oh yeah, all right.

Maybe there's a case. So we were texting like, if Mahomes isn't lights out in this Chiefs-Saints game, the door might open because you know how the 24-7 cycle works. And tomorrow on the shows and be like oh are we sure Rogers is in the MVP do you feel like Rogers is going to get some some momentum here well like I we said so they play Sunday night

against Tennessee right so you'll get all the you know you'll get a lot of focus on that not that that's a good defense or anything Tennessee but it's a playoff team and you're going to get this NFC AFC is the NFC done thing. It's funny with the NFL network. So they show that stat.

The one thing they left off, they had passer rating in there, they had touchdowns. They left off passing yards. Going into this week, Mahomes had almost 600 more passing yards. That's substantial. This is not like one guy played two games more than the other. And the other thing is, it's just, look, they both make it look easy. Aaron Rodgers has the world record for one yard touchdown passes, like onion, you know, like,

like Aaron Jones and those guys must like, what the hell's going on here? You have to have the one yard touchdown pass to pad the stats. But, uh, Aaron Rodgers just looks bored, right? He walks up to the line of scrimmage. He puts his hands in that little, that fanny pack, whatever it is. He's like looking around. If a guy drops a ball, he makes a face like, oh boy. Patrick Mahomes makes it look easy too, except he's also wearing a blindfold while doing it. He's also sawing a woman in half while throwing the ball with the other hand. Like he's really, he's inviting trouble so he could sling an underneath pass to Kelsey

for six yards. That goes for 20. So in my mind, that's the more dynamic player. That's the MVP. And you just got to go by who has the better record and plays in the better conference. Well, the other thing, it does feel like Mahomes is a lot more mobile at this point. So Rodgers has 126 rushing yards this year. Mahomes has twice as much, 250.

But it does feel like Mahomes can bail them out on a third and nine if they have 19 defensive backs in the backfield. And he'd be like, okay, cool. And he'll just scramble. He'll get nine yards when he needs eight. He'll hold the ball out to be a dick. And then let's keep going.

Rodgers can't really do that anymore. And I think 10 years ago, I thought that was a big part of his game. I mean, he had 2010, he rushed for 356 yards. Pretty good. Um, but I, he just does it. He's saving his body. He's starting to do the Brady thing where if the screen is about to get blown up and somebody is about to hit him, he'll just throw the ball at the receivers, right?

At the running backs legs. Yeah. He's doing all that stuff now. He hit him, he'll just throw the ball at the receivers, right? At the running backs legs. Yeah. He's doing all that stuff. Now he doesn't, he's smart. He's playing the long game. He wants to get to January. They're going to get the one seed, but I think my homes has just been better. I've you and I watch football every week.

We watch all the games, but home's the best part I've seen all year. I'm with you. If Lamar hadn't won it last year, I would say it was my home's last year. I'd be like, ah, maybe give it to Rogers if it's close, but it's time to give it to my homes. Yeah. I don't feel like you were with me on the, I keep to leave Monday night football thing.

I need a little more. I gotta, I gotta figure it out. I'm not understanding a lot of what he's saying. What he's doing a great, he's doing a great thing with the secondaries. And we talked about the coverage and stuff. I actually learned a lot.

Did you? He was talking about sticks and all these things. I just like that he was basically like, I don't care if I'm talking over the head of my audience sometimes. I'm just breaking this down. You don't like it in movies, but you're okay with it. I like it with A Keep to Leave. I don't like it with Christopher Nolan.

I thought he was really good. They got to put him with a play-by-play guy who can have more fun with him, though. I don't like it with Christopher Nolan. I thought he was really good. They got to put him with a play-by-play guy who can have more fun with him, though. Yeah. So there's some guy named Brandon and he was just like, you know, like normal, you know, generic play-by-play guy. I'm with you. His timing is getting better.

Like, I don't care. I'll definitely, I have no problem listening to a voice that doesn't sound like mine. Thank God. But he's talking over the play-by-play a little bit. I kind of enjoyed it, though. I felt like we were watching the game with him. I was into it. I guess I'm so bored by the

generic color analyst that's in all these games where they're just like, you know, third down of the National Football League, you got to make sure you move the chains. Just that generic way of just analyzing everything. And Tlaib's so different. I'm into it.

If we get Tlaib on the next Madden, that'll be good, right? What you just described is just very basic speak for color commentators that they throw into the Madden game. Yeah, the hands are moving. I want you to watch this left

guard. Watch this pull block here. Yeah, the hands are moving. I want you to watch this left guard. Watch this pull block here. Right. I don't know. I'm tired of that. Here's the next topic. Can't cross off the Cowboys yet. We did it.

Come on. You wanted to cross them off for weeks. You're a game back. It's over. It's not over. The number one team in your division is Dwayne Haskins. This is not over. Dwayne Haskins has, he doesn't personally,

but they have two wins over Dallas. It's over. I don't think it's over. Please, I don't want to do this again. I was out Thanksgiving. It feels good to be done. Can I give you Washington's last two games? They smashed the fruit.

I know. What is it? It's Philly and Carolina. Home for Carolina. Yeah. At Philly. So for Carolina. Yeah. At Philly. That's so that's why when Kornacki has 78% or something, it's because they're going

to be out of all the teams. They're the only one that's going to be favored in an outside a, uh, an FC East battle. You're just no fun. So you want to cross them off? I don't know where we are with the crossoffs. Who are other options? I don't know. We, we murdered the crossoffs this year. our other options? I don't know. We murdered the cross-offs

this year. We did such a bad job. People got mad at us for crossing the Patriots off. That ended up being right. Oh, the Bears we crossed off prematurely. Yeah, the Bears are back. And now fucking Trubisky's getting an extension somehow. Yeah, can you imagine being a Bears fan? Deep

down, you got to kind of talk to yourself. I was young, just needed some reps maybe it was a wake up call again bench they are a game back Chicago's a game back behind Arizona for that last spot and Arizona plays the Niners which is an increasingly awesome opponent to have

but then they're at the Rams in week 17 I have a very exciting segment for you playoff matchups right now Tough one. Week 17. I have a very exciting segment for you. What's up? Playoff matchups. Right now. Here's what we have.

If the season ended today, Pittsburgh, Miami. Right. Buffalo, Cleveland. I'm sorry. Buffalo, Indy. Tennessee, Cleveland. It's all so good, man.

This is the best bunch we've had in a while. By the way, I know the Ravens are getting in there over Miami. I mean, I think that's going to be Pittsburgh, Baltimore, which would be fun. Well, here's where we have NFC. Yeah. So we got Pitt, Miami, Buffalo Indy, Tennessee Cleveland, NFC, New Orleans, Arizona.

That's a fucking banger. Right. I'm betting Arizona right now. That's a fucking banger. Right. I'm betting Arizona right now. They haven't even scheduled that game yet. Arizona plus four, I'm in. Seattle, Tampa, Wilson, Brady. That's great. And then Washington and the Rams,

which really could be the end of golf. And first of all, that's the shakiest game. Out of those six? That's definitely it, yeah. Don't you think? Yeah, because it could be on the East Coast. Yeah, they can make it early Saturday. Well, that's the thing with the Rams.

If they're lucky enough, lucky enough, whatever. If they get the five seed, they've proved today that they could lose to anybody. Anybody. And so that Washington, I don't trust Haskins in the playoff game. I'm sorry. They'll, they'll, they'll have their shit together. The Rams by them, but you don't think we'll get Alex Smith by then or Alan, is Alan like

in, in Afghanistan? Where'd he go? I don't know. Yeah. He's off. He's in the tenant. I don't know where he went. I do.

I don't want to see new Orleans, Tampa Bay again. I hope the matchups, uh, lay out. Like you said, new Orleans, Arizona and Seattle, Tampa Bay again. I hope the matchups lay out like you said. New Orleans, Arizona, and Seattle, Tampa Bay. New Orleans, Arizona. Yeah, that's the Saturday night game. Put that baby on a Saturday night. Give me good announcers for that one.

The only AFC game I see nudging Washington and the Rams out as the shakiest game would be Tennessee-Cleveland. Right. Two smaller market teams. Cleveland can be kind of

boring, as we saw tonight, as we've seen a few times this year. It's just like two teams that are going to run the ball. That seems like a great way to start Saturday. But the thing is, with the Shakey's game, we're going to have six playoff games in two days. Yeah, they have to figure out the worst of the six. I like all the matchups.

There's no clunkers, really, right? There's no... Out of those you mentioned, you would be like... I guess you'd still be most shocked if the Rams lost. But other than that, any combination is good. Well, you know what else is interesting? If Arizona... I mean, we're doing

super hypothetical, but if Arizona ended up beating New Orleans, then they would be the team that played Green Bay in round two, which means they'd be going to Lambeau. I get it. That would be really fun, too. You're betting Arizona all the way through.

I'm not. I just... I really enjoy Kyle Murray. I really enjoy watching him. Let them fight off the Bears, for God's sakes. They better not let the Bears in. Can I give you one more scenario? Yeah. How about Cowboys-Rams round one? Why are you laughing?

Beat the hell out of them last year, right? Could Dak be ready yet? How's his ankle? No, he's not ready. Okay. You won't see him. right? It could Dak be ready yet. What has his ankle? Um, no, he's not ready. Okay. You won't see him.

You'll see him in the commercials at Sunday night ads. That's a Dallas Rams 40th anniversary of Ferragamo. No, Danny, what Ferragamo, Danny white, maybe doing the pregame coin toss. Wait a bunch of,

yeah. I mean, we've lost to them in the playoff. Yeah. Uh, come on. I don't want to do this i don't want to do it i i saw like i know this is going back now to thursday night but mariotta

leapfrogged andy dalton in a huge way is the best backup quarterback huge way to a point where it's like oh my god that's a john gruden quarterback he, yeah, the Raiders wouldn't be six and six at this point, right? Or whatever they are. I'm going to zag 20% on this. I'm going to do a mini zag because I also really enjoyed the Mariotta thing. We were texting about it the whole game. He did have like two horrible passes in that game.

Right. Including one that got dropped. And then I think one that got picked, but he, he showed the whole total Mariota package. Good and bad. I think people forgot the...

More good. I thought a couple people made a good point after about how it's hard. If you're the other team, all of a sudden this running QB comes in. You've been preparing for a car the whole time. I'll be interested to see what happens if the other team actually gets of a sudden this running QB comes in. You've been preparing for Carr the whole time. I'll be interested to see what happens if the other team

actually gets to prepare for it. Maybe we don't bet them this week. We'll see. Casey clinched the one seed. In my opinion, they did. They're playing Atlanta and the Chargers. This is a wrap. They're not losing to either of those teams. They're going to go 15-1. I guess they can clinch. They don't even have to win next week. They could just clinch beating the Chargers. This is a wrap. They're not losing to either of those teams. They're going to go 15-1. I guess they can

clinch. They don't even have to win next week. They could just clinch beating the Chargers, right? Right. Buffalo is still in the three spot. They're at New England next week, which looks like the easiest game ever now. And then home for Miami in week 17.

Pittsburgh's got after the Cincy game tomorrow, they have Indian Cleveland at home left. Both of those will be pretty tough. And the thing with Cle with Cleveland, that's like, I would say the biggest Browns game in 15 years, right?

Since, since we maybe more since we were in the Jimmy Kimmel live offices, watching Derek Anderson play play. Yeah, that could be Cleveland. If Cleveland loses, they're out because Baltimore's got the Giants and Cincy left.

They're 9-5. Cleveland's 10-4. But did Baltimore beat them, what, at least once, right? Yeah, they killed them the first time. They beat them twice. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. So Cleveland would be basically playing for a playoff spot in that game.

Well, Cleveland's beating the Jets. So they'll have 11 wins. Cleveland's beating the Jets this week. Yeah. Right. But if Miami... So I don't know how that works with Cleveland because they have the same conference record as Miami.

Miami's got at Vegas, at Buffalo last two. Buffalo will have something to play for. So odds are Miami doesn't make it. And I'm okay with that because I don't think they're one of the seven best teams. I'd rather see the Ravens over Miami if it means like another Baltimore Pittsburgh game. But I think like what's more likely to happen in that week 17 is Pittsburgh's not going to care. You know, that's what the one the only one seed being off does. Pittsburgh might not care where they're seated.

Right. And Cleveland might have a playoff berth. They may not care where they're seated. Right. So they might both sit guy. I think you're going to run into that for a few different week 17 scenarios. Well, we could have Pittsburgh Baltimore. Right.

Which, which will, uh, that's, I mean, what's, when is it not fun when the Ravens and Steelers play? And then in the other division, it would really take Arizona falling apart. I would say losing their last two. Chicago is somehow still in it at 9-7, which is unbelievable to me. But I guess...

9-7? Wait, at... If they can get to 9-7. Yeah, right. Yep, yep, yep. At Jacksonville next week and then home for Minnesota and if Chicago's

in the playoffs Shakey's has already adopted them as the Shakey's game they don't care they don't care who they're playing but yeah

I gotta say these are good playoff games though we don't have that you know that that kind of crappy oh man the only one is really

you know Washington but even Washington their defense is effing good That kind of crappy, man. The only one is really Washington. But even Washington, their defense is effing good. And the fact that they almost beat Seattle today without Gibson, I was really impressed. I thought Haskins got at least confident as that game went along. It was very weird. I mean, maybe Seattle was looking ahead. They obviously have big NFC West showdowns,

so maybe they were looking ahead. They had to travel, all that stuff. Russ had a very pedestrian game. What did he have, like 127 yards or something? But they didn't have to do anything, right, for the longest time because Haskins had terrible field position and wasn't moving that team, and then he just came alive at the end. They were fun.

I think they wrap it up. I think they wrap the vision up soon. Their running game is just not, not impressive. Seattle hide broke one today. He broke a 50 yarder. And that was like to watch a Seahawks running back break a, you're like, oh my God. But Wilson's really their best running back. Um, I, something's off with them because they have a lot of trouble putting these

games away. And these other teams seem to keep hanging around and hanging around against them. I do not think Seattle is that good. That's a team I would want to play if I was in the playoffs. I did a medium-sized dive on this. Teams, what they look like, what they do after they play the Jets.

I think they're like 3-7 against us. 3-7 and three against us. Like, it's not good. The jets screw you up. They make you think like you're playing a real football team. And then you're like, Oh,

what's this is a, eventually during the four quarters, you'll see that you need to step up your game and you may not have enough in the tank. All the, uh, all the conventional teases one this week. I had done it. I did a whole thing on Million Dollar Picks about when 10-win teams in Week 15 play teams that have a losing record, basically, in how it's been basically lights out.

The Rams were not a 10-win team, but somebody had to screw up all the awesome money line parlays, teasers, all that stuff. What did you, you had the Rams and money parlays? What did you have them in? You would be sick at what I heard. I just sat down. I said, the Rams are winning. Who did I have? I said, the Ravens are winning.

The Rams are winning. And the Steelers are winning. And the Steelers are winning tomorrow. And Canelo? And Canelo. No, no. Canelo I had with all the winners yesterday. Because it's true. College football, the winners came are winning tomorrow. And Canelo? And Canelo. No, no, Canelo I had with all the winners yesterday. Because it's true, college football, the winners came in.

All of them. Even Ohio State, Alabama. But no, I had the three-teamer and just gave like $3 to win a dollar. But at many, many, many more multiples. Terrible. You had them on a bunch. What did you have?

Like on a seven-teamer or something? I'm like on a seven team or something. I did a, I did the rarely seen four teamer, uh, 13 points. Cause I wanted to get the Rams under seven. I didn't think the jets would be able to get to 10 points. Right.

But it was one of those games. First of all, it started at four. Like exactly. Yeah. All the other games were still ending. It was like that sneaky game or it's like, Oh,

let's go to LA where the jets are on the board. It's like, sneaky game where it's like, oh, let's go to LA where the Jets are on the board. It's like, wait a second, it's 7-0? Yeah, yeah. I didn't even know the game started. And then Goff had that look on his face. And I almost wonder when McVay, when Goff has that look on his face, if McVay ever thinks of benching him.

Interesting. Yeah. I don't know. You have some children. you have multiple kids. Right. When your kids hit that, when they're like, I don't know, age two, age three, and you know, they're headed for the meltdown when you're at like a restaurant or a movie theater or whatever.

And you see, you can see the meltdown five minutes away. Yeah. And he's just like, I know what's going to happen. He's going to become a huge asshole in front of everybody five minutes from now. That's how I feel about Goff sometimes in these games. You're like, oh, man. He's doing the play action where the tight end leaks out.

And he looks like a deer on ice skates. And then he almost throws it to the defensive lineman who drops the pick. And they're like, oh, man. Goff didn't see him. you're just like oh my god this is one of the golf games but then what he does like the next week it just seems like mcveigh just has to have that disappointed dad talk with him right he's like son you know what come on you know even though he's goff older than mcveigh i don't even know at this point it's like it's like

it's like hey all right all right come on come back and then goff like dad you see what i did i went 26 for 30 and i hit higby in the end zone three times. Like, yeah, good, good, do that next week. It's like, whoa, whoa, whoa, one at a time. I have to zigzag. I'm the zigzag quarterback of the millennium. Before we get to guest lines, what was the game where they had the, oh, the Bucs game?

There was, Fournette had, I guarantee this doesn't become a story tomorrow. You, me, and House might have been the only ones that noticed it. Fournette's running to basically end the game and gets tackled at least a half yard before the chain. Oh, yeah. And it's like, oh, he didn't get it. It was just so obvious on the TV.

It wasn't even like, oh, maybe he got it. It was like, he definitely didn't get it. Then they spot the ball a half yard ahead of where it was. After reviewing it. Yeah. After reviewing like, he definitely didn't get it. Then they spot the ball a half yard ahead of where it was. After reviewing it. Yeah. After reviewing it. Then the chains come out and they bring the chain and he didn't get it. And they take the chain and they lean the chain toward the ball.

He never got it. It's like at a 30 degree angle. They're like, oh, first down Tampa. That's just like, whoa, kind of looked like he didn't get it. And it meant something too, because they could kick the field goal and cover the spread, or they could not go for it. There's a lot going on there, right? It was like the classic, oh, shit, this has the feeling of the officiating crew

has Atlanta plus six and a half. All the things were so shady because it was all designed to keep the Bucs drive going, so they didn't kick the field goal. I thought it was the weirdest thing I saw all day. Do you know the weirdest thing we saw all day is that the bucks were plus three 60 at halftime against Atlanta. And I texted you like, why? I was like, Oh yeah, Atlanta.

They blow every single game. They don't have any pride. They don't care if they have worse loss in franchise history. It was 28, three against the guy staring them down across the field right now. They're going to do it again. And they did. He did the entire Matt Ryan playbook, except for he didn't throw the terrible pick late in the fourth quarter. But he tried to do the get sack to knock his team out of field goal range move. But Koo was like, no, no, I'm going to make

it anyway. He was like a 52-yarder. But he hit all the beats. I was listening to House on the Ringer NFL on Friday. And House was like adamant. He's like, I'm throwing in Tampa. I hate Matt Ryan. He was basically hate betting against Matt Ryan. And I was texting House like, that was the most irrational I've ever. Tampa's going to struggle to cover this and might lose. And Matt Ryan's going to do well.

And you just hate Matt Ryan. And I was like, you're hate betting against Matt Ryan. So we were texting back and forth about the hate bet, but it made me think like, that's a funny gimmick. The hate bet. I think it is too.

Yeah. Who's your hate bet next week? Well, I don't know about next week, but the bears definitely, I can't bounce back with them. I can't look and see if they did poorly one week. I'm like,

that's it. I'm hate back with them. I can't look and see if they did poorly one week. I'm like, that's it. I'm hate betting against them. And I almost certainly lose betting against them every single time, including this week. My hate bet might be, uh, I might just have to hate back off next week. Really?

Yeah. I was really, I was offended by his performance today. I don't know. Let's, uh, let's do guest alliance. We'll take a break first. The BS pod is brought to you by FanDuel Fantasy. It seems like just yesterday that LA was popping

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That's fanduel.com slash ringer NBA. All right, guess the lines. Week 16. This is the weirdest slate I think I've ever looked at because we have a Friday night, three Saturdays, Sunday, and Monday. Four nights in a row. I can't remember ever watching it play out like this before. Has this happened? Well, this is a Christmas thing, right?

So Friday's Christmas, they want one game and they're competing with your beloved NBA here, Vikings at Saints. And then they're usually Saturday games this time of year, right? And then obviously Sunday and Monday. All right. I'm not arguing. All right. I'm not arguing. All right. This is great.

I feel like our wives are just going to absolutely hate us. And there's bowl games, Bill. Too bad you don't like college. Bowl games all week, too. I was thinking of you yesterday after the two football games with the college football, but then Canelo getting thrown on at the end. I was thinking about your wife stomping around

in the kitchen like, what is this over? How much longer, Sal? Like the shrill voice. Right. This has worked out nicely because she has spent 30 of the last 36 hours watching the queen.

What's it called? The crown? The crown. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So it's like she's wherever she is. I'm wherever I want. Every now and then the kids will scream and we'll pretend to care.

Somebody's bleeding. Put a bandaid on it. Friday night. Saints-Vikings in New Orleans. I bumped this slightly high assuming that they needed to jack it up a tiny bit because it's such an obvious tease. But I said Saints by seven and a half. Come on. I bumped this slightly high, assuming that they needed to jack it up a tiny bit for it because it's such an obvious tease.

But I said Saints by seven and a half. Come on. Why do you have to cheat? It looks so obvious when you cheat with the first one, right? Don't you notice that? You're a smart guy. I said six. It's indeed seven and a half.

That's the... You're up one nothing. I put a little extra time in my picks this week because I didn't want to lose this week. Well, let me ask you this. You helped me out because I've now picked eight in a row on Fox Thursday night football. Yeah. And I'm appearing on the game, the pregame

show for this one. This is Christmas. And you actually stared me in the right direction with the charges. I said, tell me why I shouldn't bet the Raiders. And you went over that last three. Atlanta crushed them. The Jets should have beaten them. They got beat last week badly. So I was like, all right. I looked at that. I bet the Raiders and you went over that last three. Atlanta crushed them. The Jets should have beaten them. They got beat last week badly. So I was like, alright. I looked at that. I bet the Chargers.

Is there any reason to tarnish my streak by taking the Vikings here? Straight up. It's straight up on TV. Oh, it's straight up? It's straight up. So no line? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Why wouldn't he take New Orleans then?

That's what I'm saying. Is there any reason not to? No. Take New Orleans. All you have to do is win by a point? Yeah, it's not exciting, but I think that's probably the way I should go. You know it.

You're just like Goff. Kirk Cousins is the same way. Like every other week, he steps up. I like them when they're getting a lot of points, though, because I feel like they have such easy garbage time potential. Yeah, that's true. They could be down 14 and still get it. But if you don't have to worry about the points, so be it. I don't think they can beat the Saints.

You know, speaking of streaks, by the way, our friend Randy, a.k.a. Brad, who was on your podcast with the Against All Odds crew. Right. He's in this crazy survivor pool. We used to be in it, and then we bailed, right? Yeah. Years ago.

What is the final prize? Like $500,000? So there's... A million dollars? No, it's like $530,000 involved. There's 5,300 entrants, and he's down to like 30. He's one of 34 remaining. So he,

he came on your pod trying to figure out he had like eight teams left. He could use, right. You guys talked it out and he landed on Arizona and Dallas, which Arizona slim pickings the rest of the way. He has to pick two every week. Now the rest of the way. And he has all the,

I mean, he liked a lot of people just picked against the jets and Jaguars as much as he could, uh, did that, uh, for the first, uh, 15 weeks. And yeah, now he's, I mean, he's going crazy. I mean, is it, is it scarier that someone like that has a half a million dollars at his disposal or, or scarier that he is now, you know, Brad, I thought Hench made a good point. He wouldn't, Brad, would have been my top hundred people.

I'd want to have $500,000. I do fear. I do fear for him for a variety of reasons. Well, he owes me $507,000. So maybe I'll do the right thing. I'll let him off. He'll still be short.

Well, so who's he taking next week? Have you talked to him? Uh, I talked to him. So one of his picks is Chicago over Jacksonville. He's kind of got to do that.

They're a favorite. The other, I don't know. He's got a few NFC East teams he has to go through in his mind. Good luck, Brad. Saturday's games. First one is awful. Bucks-Lions. Just feels like the classic, Bucs look really good everybody's like, oh, the Bucs

rounding in his shape it's like, you're not going to know anything if they beat up on the Lions I don't know what to make of this Bucs team they were Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde this week Brady looked like he was about to be sent to pasture and then threw for like 300 yards in the second half

I have the Bucs favored by 7.5 in Detroit Brady looked like he was about to be sent to pasture and then threw for like 300 yards in the second half. I have the Bucs favored by seven and a half in Detroit. I don't know why I went light here. I said six and a half. It is eight. You are correct. I mean, you could kind of knock out a teaser Friday, Christmas Day, and, you know, Saints Bucs. Well, I was going to say this next one could be in there too.

Cards 49ers in Arizona. The 49ers, they just can't get out of Arizona. It's like the Amityville Horror House. They were playing their home games there. Now they have to stay there anyway. Mostert looked really good before he got hurt. It's a shame that guy can't stay in the field because I think he's the best guy in the league

at the 45-degree angle run. Yeah. Right? Where it just feels like he's going full speed toward the sideline every time. Then he can, like, turn the corner at the end. And it felt like he was going to rush for 200 yards in that game. So they won't have him, and they just seem snakebit.

And at this point, if you're the 49ers, you're just trying to get to the end of the season. I have the cards by 7.5 against San Francisco. Oh, wow. You're going to love this. seem snake bit. And at this point, if you're the 49ers, you're just trying to get to the end of the season. I have the cards by seven and a half against San Francisco. Oh, wow. You're going to love this. Maybe I should recheck it. I said four and a half and it's three and a half. What?

Let me recheck that one. It's in Arizona. In Arizona. That doesn't make sense to me. Hold on. Hold on. At all. Well, not a lot of respect thrown Arizona's way.

It's three and a half. Three and a half. Over under 50. Yeah. I did not like what I saw from the 49ers today. I mean, what was Philadelphia today? What was Arizona-Philly? Six and a half.

Yeah. It's close. Yeah, it should be a little higher. I don't know if you know this, but the Cowboys aren't good. And they were controlling that game. I told you that. I know it so much, I want to cross them off. And you don't.

No, I'm not crossing them off. Last one is Raiders Dolphins, which is a fun one. Brings us back to our childhood. There were a lot of good Raiders Dolphins games in the 70s. Clarence Davis. Todd Christensen. Oh, yeah. Dave Casper.

I didn't know what to do with this one. And I think I got this wrong. I have the Raiders by one. Yeah, you got it wrong. I had the Dolphins plus two and a half, and it's plus two. You have the Raiders. Dolphins giving. Sorry.

Dolphins giving two and a half And they're giving two So Dolphins are giving two In Vegas Yeah Well they're a playoff team And Raiders suck I was not impressed

With the Dolphins today They're kind of Out of skill guys now Even that That stupid Patriots Kind of hung around with them For Three quarters

And it didn't make a lot of sense watching it. It was a good second half, though, right? I feel a good number. They shut them out in the first half, the Patriots. Didn't they? They did. I don't know. Two had one bad red zone throw that wasn't helping.

I feel like you need Gasicki and all those guys, but come on. You're not betting the Raiders the rest of the season. You said it yourself. There's tape on Mariota. You could plan for him. Or are we being set up for the Mariota? He actually kicks ass the last two weeks. And then somebody signs him to $70 million for four years.

Interesting. The Jets do. Yeah, the Jets. He's their backup player after the third pick. I'll root for that. Sunday's marquee game. I gave it to Steelers-Colts narrowly edging Seahawks-Rams because Jared Goff does not deserve to be in a's marquee game. I gave it to Steelers Colts narrowly edging Seahawks Rams because Jared Goff does not deserve

to be in a Sunday marquee game. The freaking parlay murderer. That should be his wrestling gimmick. The parlay murderer Jared Goff. Can you get HBO to do a documentary about the parlay murderer? It's a nine part series. Catherine

Oxenberg's in it. His parents are like, we didn't see it coming. The neighbors, he was such a good boy. He started killing cats. That's what we do. Never talk about murdering parlays. Here we are. Sunday Marquis, Steelers home for the Colts.

Colts are pretty good. And have a knack for, Leonard made an awesome play to do the old punch out to save the game today. Does that ever happen with the consecutive fumbles against the team like in a matter of three weeks under two minutes inside the 10

in a one score game. That was phenomenal It was weird. I thought Deshaun was pretty good in that game. I think the Colts are pretty good. Yeah I have the Steelers by six over the Colts. Oh, wow. I said three. It's two and a half.

No one trusts the Steelers. In Pittsburgh. No one trusts the Steelers offense. That's just. You can't drop every ball. Does Mike Tomlin know about this? Well, don't forget. The Colts have been playing teams that they're just as good at

or a little inferior and giving three on the road. Right? Yeah. Every time we go through this, I'm like, really? The Colts have favored this? The fact that they're giving the Steelers a nod means Vegas must think something's up here. The watchables got three. Chiefs, Falcons, it's in Kansas City. I have Chiefs by 11. I think they have to keep this low because of the garbage time touchdown potential.

What do you nailed it? That's exactly 11. I said 10. That's not fun. Boy, that's a three team tease staring at us. No, there's another one.

There's another, I mean, it looks easier than this week. Ravens playing the giants. I, I initially had than this week. Ravens playing the Giants. I initially had this as Ravens 8.5. I'm going to bump this up a point because the Giants looked like dead men walking today. I have Ravens by 9.5 over the Giants. Son of a bitch.

I had 9.5 also. It's 10. We split that. I mean, that's five games we like on teasers right now. Somebody is going to screw it up. Of course. Seahawks Rams is the other watchable game. Russell Wilson going against the parlay murderer, Jared Goff.

Do you want to do Vince McMahon bringing in the parlay murderer, Jared Goff? From parts unknown, weight unknown, I give you the parlay murderer. Gorilla, weight unknown. I give you the parlay murderer. Gorilla, cover up. Parlay murderer. You're fighting the unpredictable Johnny Rods in Rochester on Sunday. Yeah, I have the Seahawks by four over the rims. What's his finishing move? The intentional grounding?

Like 40 yards from anyone? The intentional grounding. No, isn't it the fumbled snap? Oh, yeah. He set them up for the fumbled snap. The fumbled snap. Oh, my God. What did you say this one was?

I had Seahawks by four over the parlay burner. I got this exactly. It's three. As of now, it's three. Oh, wow. Yeah. Not a lot of four over the parlay burner. I got this exactly. It's three. As of now, it's three. Oh, wow. Yeah. Not a lot of respect for the parlay burner. I think that's how they're going to do these games the rest of the way.

These one and two seeds in the NFC West. So, can we not say the Rams have a great defense now? I think we can officially retire that conversation, right? I thought in the Donald, Donald, Donald thing, uh, Darren Donald would be more in the,

in the face of, uh, Sam Donald. I, I, they didn't pressure them at all. It was, it was quite the opposite.

McVay should have come out after the game and just been like, look, man, the jets suck. My guys weren't fired up. It was a stupid game. We lost. We'll be really good next week. Like it happens. This guys weren't fired up. It was a stupid game. We lost. We'll be really good next week.

Like, it happens. This is professional sports. Exactly. Everybody thought we were going to win by 20, and we didn't. Barely watchable is they got three. Washington against the Panthers. It's the Ron Rivera revenge game.

I watched it by two and a half over the Panthers. That's exactly what I said, and it's two. So they win this, they're pretty much in, right? Two gloves is fun to watch, though. What did you have, barely watchable for this? I'm going to watch this one. I had barely watchable only because of

the QB situation for Washington. But Haskins wasn't bad. I don't know what they do with Haskins now. He showed enough in the secondB situation for Washington. But Haskins wasn't bad. I don't know what they do with Haskins now. He showed enough in the second half of that game. It's a tough one. That he's not a write-off anymore. Right. Yeah, we were talking about,

is he even going to be a backup in the league next year? Yeah, and he just came to life in the second half. He's pretty good. Next one, Chargers-Broncos. I only have this as a barely watchable out of respect to Justin Herbert, who's fucking awesome to one. Chargers Broncos. I only have, this is a barely watchable out of respect to Justin Herbert. Who's fucking awesome to watch. Congrats to that guy.

Chargers by five over the Broncos. I said four and it's three. Oh man. They're giving the Broncos team a lot of respect after that Saturday drubbing. Jesus. I would have said three before they lost by a hundred points on Saturday.

The bills make sure I had, there's another one I have to check because I'm not. Yeah, it lost by 100 points on Saturday. The bills make sure I have. There's another one. I have to check because I'm not. Yeah, it's three, three and 50. Next one. Barely watchables. Eagles at Dallas. This is a loser leaves town match.

I don't know if you realize that we're gone. We left town. Loser leaves town. So long ago. We Airbnb'd it the hell out of there. I have the Eagles by two in Dallas. You're going to get this. Wow, this is the biggest discrepancy we've had.

So I had Dallas by four. I don't know why. It's a pick-em. So you get it. Okay. Vegas is like, I have no clue. You guys figure this shit out. This is so unwatchable.

Pick-em. I think now that Hertzts is coming on, knowing how the networks do it, where they love to gravitate to 70s and 80s songs for montages that nobody under 40 has ever heard of, I think we're headed for a Hurts So Good montage. Oh, wow. For Jalen Hurts, for this doubt.

They're coming out of commercial. Yeah. I think a 20-second Hurts So Good, John Cougar, Mellencamp. It's good. I'm just calling, calling right now.

Not Love Hurts? Love Hurts is another good one. Love Hurts. That'd be good. That'd be good. Yeah. Followed by Aqib Tlaib not knowing what's going on.

Can we get Aqib back next week? That's a good one, Grim. Aqib, you're my guy. Call me. Poop Fecta.

Got three. This first one's really especially Grim. Akif, you're my guy. Call me. Poopfecta. Got three. This first one's really especially poopy. Browns minus 12.5 over the Jets was my pick. Oh, that's what you think. Wow. Nine and a half, I said, and it's 10. All right. Let's just quickly.

Baltimore beats the Giants. I can't. Come on. I'm not parlaying. I'm not putting the Brownants. I can't. Come on. I'm not parlaying. I'm not putting the Browns in a parlay. Really? What do you mean?

I'm scarred forever with the Jets. They can't win back-to-back. They can't. Did you see poor John Fantasy? They cannot do it. They did something nobody's done in 25 years this week. I'm not betting against the Jets. Next one is the Bears at Jacksonville.

This has all the makings in so many different ways of the Mitch Trubisky. Another interception for Trubisky. That's his third. Right, right, right. I had the Bears by three and a half

in Jacksonville. Wow. I hit this exactly. I said seven. I'm way off. I'm way off today. Seven and seven against one and 13. What do you mean three and a half? What do I mean three and a half? Mitch Trubisky is the quarterback of one of the teams.

He's favored by a touchdown? You understand Jacksonville now is in, they keep saying the driver's seat, which is hilarious because they're trying to drive off a cliff. They just have to lose their last two. Well, Mitch Trubisky's on the other team. Last one, Texans, Bengals. I don't know.

I had Texans by seven. Yeah, I said seven and a half. It's nine. Oh, you're going to beat me this week. I thought I was going to do good this week. I'm like five weeks behind. Five, three, four, five, six, seven, eight. I think it's nine to five.

Nine to six. Those three games. You know, I got to complain about DirecTV for a second. Yeah. They have, you know, the four box, channel 701, which is really great. You get the four TVs and the four squares. You can switch around the audio. Yeah.

And then one of the games was the Tennessee game. What do we? Oh, yeah. Today. I do the seven. I do the eight. I do the eight box, actually. And I just go back and forth.

I know. Jesus. So what do you do? You have red zone and the four box. I have I have the four box. I have the Patriots on another TV and then either red zone or a six game. If I don't care,

if I have all the red zone teams covered, I don't need red zone. Right. So I thought, I don't know how Minnesota, Chicago doesn't crack channel seven Oh one. And I don't know why they, they need consultants for channel seven Oh one.

It's such an important channel. Like you can't fuck that one up. Tennessee, Tennessee, Detroit. That was never going to be a close game. Yeah, you're right. Minnesota, Chicago had playoff implications.

That was it. That was a loser leaves town. Do you have that thing where you can't switch the audio at a certain time? Sometimes you don't get that outside blue rim over a box and you can't. Yeah, like jams. So at 1.05 our time, 4 Eastern, 4.05 Eastern, you lose the box.

You lose the ability to change the audio. And you'll be on some kind of like guitar riff if the game is over. I'm like, get me off of this thing. And you have to like press channel up, down like five times before it'll reactivate the use of that blue box to control it. Yeah, DirecTV, I'm a 20-year DirecTV subscriber. They have never figured out what music to play when it's like after a pay-per-view ends or after your Sunday ticket package. You're right.

It's like it's a cross between like a wrestling intro and the loudest porn music you've ever heard. It's just like a really loud guitar jamming. It's weird. They get this. Can you make the Spotify play? Maybe they just play hurt so good over and over. Yeah.

Maybe Spotify should make a deal with direct TV. For sure. Yeah. I don't know if it's going to be 21 years for me and direct TV. No. Well, they're good. Are they going to lose it anyway?

I think they're good. If they lose it, I'm done. Direct TV. You better keep it. You better, better keep Sunday ticket. You're going to lose a lot of audience think they're going to, if they lose it, I'm done. DirecTV, you better keep it. You better keep Sunday Ticket. You're going to lose a lot of audience. For sure. Sunday night, Green Bay home for Tennessee.

Now we get to answer the question we asked earlier. Is Tennessee better than every team in the NFC? We're going to find out on Sunday night. Good gauge. I have Packers by three and a half. We're going to split this. I said four and a half. It's four. That's fair.

That's a good one to just watch. It's too bad I'm going to be down so much money that I'm going to be forced to bet that game, but it would be a good one to watch. Do we get Al Michaels for this one? I think the plan is to get Al. Yeah. I love Al.

You're doing the right thing i was like uh colt mccoy in 3000 pound trip for colt mccoy against baker mayfield i'm gonna sit this one out can you give this to rico by the way they screwed up flexing that that was super boring game we almost started this podcast like an hour early like during the game we've never done that and uh right they flexed cowboys niners out, which was actually decent. Like an onside kick returned for a touchdown. It was fun.

And a Hail Mary that the Cowboys didn't lose on somehow. They should have done Arizona-Philly. That game was awesome. Yeah. Monday night, Bills-Pats. The official passing of the torch of the AFC East. Mm-hmm.

It's in Buffalo, right? No. It's in New England. Yeah. That's what I meant. That's why my guess was low. I had Bills by six in New England. You want to change it?

No. You could change it. I said eight. It's six and a half. You get it. But I think I wouldn't win. Four, five, six, seven, eight. One, two the win. Four, five, six, seven, eight. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight.

Oh, my God. Trouncing. 11-8. And then you are including ties. And then you're up nine, five to two. I can't catch up here. This is stupid. I don't see any conceivable way the Patriots can beat the Bills.

Really? Especially now that Gilmore's out. Yeah, because you can't match. I'm trying to think. So the ways to beat him is shut him down defensively or wow them offensively. And yeah, you probably can't do either of those things. Well, the other thing is teams now, they're just not going to let us

run the ball. Although if Harris plays next week, maybe. I like that Jacoby Meyer. You get excited with him a little bit, right? I like Myers. I love watching Bird run wide open and then have the ball sail five yards over his head. I think he's done a nice job of not seeming too bummed out

every time the pass is bounced. He's been wide open 30 times this year and not gotten the ball, even though the ball was thrown to him. It's sad. Bird, I see you. All right. You won this week. We're going to take one more break. Let's do some Parent Corner. Yeah. All right. It's time for Parent Corner brought to you by CarMax, America's number one used car retailer. Whether you're buying or selling, our friends at CarMax

are on your side. They have a seven-day money-back guarantee at CarMax. You've got a full week to decide if it's the right car for you or simply return it for a full refund. No questions asked. If it's time to sell, stop by CarMax today to get a custom offer on your car. Leave with payment in hand or take a week to think it over. Car buying, car selling, the way it should be at CarMax. Check them out today at CarMax.com. All right, Cousin Sal, you have the floor.

Well, I have one quick thing and then one other thing. Like today, Sunday's anything. All week, anything goes with eating with me because I'm a slob. But today, around noon, I'm watching the games. I grab this big bag of chips. I go to open it. I'm making noise. And my seven-year-old, he's going to be seven next week if he

minds his P's and Q's, says out loud, he says, oh, there goes Datto Fatto doing his thing. Me eating chips is doing his thing, Datto Fatto. So he just lost a good percentage of his Christmas gifts with that comment. But speaking of gifts, I was very excited because this was the first year I didn't have to take the kids shopping to get a gift for their mother. You've not done this yet, right? You just count, you're just hoping that your kids do the right thing

and get a gift for their mother or do you have to organize this? No, I usually organize it. You organize. Or else on eight o'clock on December 24th. They're scrambling. Right. Exactly.

So I said to Arj, my oldest, the same age as your oldest. I'm like, hey, what's going on? Do we really have to go to a freaking mall now? And he's like, no, I took care of it. I was like, really? How did you take care of it? He's like, I ordered it online. It got here.

I heard mom talking about something she wanted and it got here. And, uh, and I had the, uh, the younger ones pay for it. I was like, wow. I was like, you figured out change and everything. Cause I know they'll get like $50 bills from their grandparents. I'm like, how did you work? I was like really interested in how they, and I know Harris, so the youngest gets like $2 bills for losing a tooth. So I'm like, he's handing you $2 bills. And Archie's like, yeah, we worked it out. I was like, really? It's paid for?

He's like, yeah, it's here. Great. The mistake he made was he hid it in Harris' room. And he thought it was for him. And he opened it. And he comes downstairs and is wearing this Fitbit. And the freaking other kids are going crazy. Like, what the fuck are you doing?

They're so mad at him. He thought it was for him. He sees a gift in his room. He had no idea it was hidden. And also he tore open the box like a bear got into like a cabin in the middle of winter. So there's no way to return this thing. So now he's in tears. And now guess what?

Just like you said, December 24th, 8 p.m. I'm probably going to have to go out and get another but i mean he was screaming so much that i think the fitbit registered like seven steps or something the fitbit quit the fitbit's like i've had enough of you people i'm going with the elf on the shelf so that's it so now i'm back in charge of getting the gift for them how did it go with the elf on the shelf just to follow up on that did you fit did you tell them the elf in the shelf went back home no No, I didn't. Because of the pandemic?

We're still moving it around. We had a good week. Oh, you sap. We had six out of seven good days since I last spoke to you. And then one day we missed, we hit it quickly in the morning. Yeah, but I'm done with it. For my parent corner, so last week I talked about how we got the puppy, which it was really a delight. I've been posting pictures on Instagram. You can see it's really an adorable puppy.

It's still getting frozen out by the, uh, other dogs. Although Jesse has been like kind of sort of playing with them, but it's still, it still feels like the 85 all-star game with Michael Jordan, where it's just, there's a lot of jealousy.

He's a star in the rise. They're, they're not running plays for him. It's, it's a bummer. He just wants to play. So. Well, what percentage attention is he getting from you and your wife and kids? I think that's part of it. Yeah. So Willie, um, who was the last rescue dog we had is very handsome and who has been this very happy dog and has been in a funk and care. So my wife is super upset about Willie specifically with that. Willie's not doing well with Murph,

the new puppy and, uh, took him for a long walk on Wednesday. And then Willie was in a better mood after. And she's like, that's what it was. Willie just needed some time. I'm like,

you're a lunatic. Willie has like 15. It didn't matter. And you's like, that's what it was. Willie just needed some time. I'm like, you're a lunatic. Willie has like 15. It didn't matter. Anyway. Um, so things we had to wake up like twice a night with the puppy. And most of the time my wife wakes up because I can sleep through like a train going through the room and I'll, I'll usually wake up with them at like five 45, six in the morning. So now we're both tired and cranky. But we'd kind of managed it and figured it out. And it's like, he's taking these long puppy naps, but he'll play with toys. The last two days,

all of a sudden he became like alpha dog, male puppy, crazy dog. And now it's like we're scrambling and we're going to be holding on for dear life over the next three months. So this dog is a maniac. Really? We should have known.

And it was going to be true, but now he's like nine and a half weeks and he's, he's just taking runs at the other dogs. They're getting mad at him. He's anytime the doors open, he's out. He's shitting in the house, shitting outside the house. Um, so anyway, it's, it was getting tense. And today it led to tonight, the first ever four-way argument I think we've ever had in our house. Oh, well, cause I had the dog all day watching football humans involved. They're all, it was all the four of us. Uh, the kids who claimed they were going to be helpful. You're not going to believe this, but have fallen short a little bit. And then my wife,

she wanted to work out, and then she had to go get Christmas gifts, so she was gone, and the kids didn't help me. And then at six o'clock, it turned into all of us yelling at each other, like a Saturday Night Live sketch, that Will Ferrell sketch, when he's screaming at Sarah Michelle

Gellar, and they're all yelling at it, the Dodd Stratus. It's just the four of us all blaming each other and it's all this gorgeous, awesome puppy that we have who's just driving a wedge in our entire family. Nobody's sleeping.

We're all losing our minds. I love the idea that the puppy had like human reactions like new to be good the first couple of weeks. Like you were visiting an orphanage and adopting a child. Like they're on their best behavior. No, you know what it was? It's like the good son with Macaulay Culkin. Right, right, right. Yeah. He, he seems like he's on his best behavior and then all of

a sudden he's throwing a mannequin off the bridge and costing like a 20 car pile up. That's great. Um, he is, he's very, very frisky. He's going to be a great dog. And I already, I already know he's going to swim, which was all I cared about, but it's, it's going to be a rocky next three months. And I don't know what my next three months of podcasts are going to be like, I'm going to sound like I'm drunk and half of these, because I've like barely slept. You know what I never wanted. I believe in women's intuition. Like when it comes to the kids, like, no, no, he's sick or something. But when maybe carries the same way, but my wife Melissa is like with the dog like oh he's terrified he's scared did you hear those fireworks he's scared look how scared he is like the fuck you mean he's laying in the bed like he

always does he doesn't look scared we have to talk about this for 20 minutes how scared he is but they they my wife seems to know exactly what is on the dog's mind. A dog that doesn't have the ability to think, I don't think. They're like the dog whisperer. Well, I've been getting up at like 545 and just kind of going through emails, watching bad TV shows and all that. And the dog is just like, you know, eating the table, doing this, doing that.

It's really something, but nice. It'll, it'll be paying off when he's swimming in the Pacific ocean. You just want the dog to swim. That's crazy. All right. All right.

That was parent corner brought to you by CarMax, America's number one used car retailer, car buying, car selling the way it should be. Check them out today at CarMax.com. All right, Sal, what do you have to plug other than your eight-game winning streak?

Oh, eight-game winning streak. Yeah, that'll be on Christmas Day. You'll enjoy that on Friday, the pregame show. Extra points. Podcast Network, Monday, Wednesday, Friday with Damoshek and Charlotte Wilder. The Against the Lodge crew will be on. We're going to discuss the NBA breakdown. That starts Tuesday.

I don't know if you knew, Bill, but the season starts. It resumes Tuesday. It was a shorter offseason. We have Waver Wire, Lemon Pepper Parlay, Laugh Lines. Jenny Taft is going to be on with us and Minus Three Podcast. And yeah. Oh, you can't lose them all. World Central Kitchen is getting donations for every preorder.

And Fantasy, me versus you in the finals. How did that work out? You set up this league. It's the take your ball and go home league. And there we are. We're in the finals. How did that work out? You set up this league. It's the take your ball and go home league. And there we are. We're in the finals. We had the two best teams. And now we go head to head.

And it's going to be great. I can't wait. I put down just a couple bets I like for NBA. Oh, yeah. So I looked at everything. The undervalued team right now is Portland. Because I actually think Portland's going to be really, really good. Really?

And a potential top four seed, but they're being treated like a seven and nine seed, which I don't fully understand. I actually think they're probably a better regular season team than a playoff team. So anyway, we'll be talking about that. I've seen people take Lillard at 19-1 on FanDuel for MVP. You think that's doable?

If you like Portland, you got to think that's kind of close. It's really hard for a guard to win unless it's like a Curry 2015 Warriors situation. The guy and his odds are starting to drop a little bit. I think on FanDuel, it was 12-1 on Saturday. But I think Durant is in play. That was... His odds are too high. It's down to 10. Down to too high. It's down to 10.

I think his odds. Down to 10 now. It's down to 10. I think his odds should be like five to one. And again, I can't bet on it because I have a vote, but. Right. I think that Brooklyn team is going to be really good. They have a lot of offense.

And at least in the regular season, I don't know if it's going to translate to the playoffs, but in the regular season, that team's going to be able going to translate to the playoffs, but in the regular season, that team's going to be able to score and their bench can come in and they can score in Durant. Honestly, it looks as good as he did 18 months ago. Yeah.

I think he's a hundred percent back. So I love that team at six to one. Why not? If they breeze through the East, I mean, breeze through is tough with Milwaukee and some of the hot, I know you like Philadelphia. You always like Philadelphia is a little bit of a long shot.

Well, you know what? I liked a couple of those three to one division bets because just because of COVID, like who knows, especially with a short season, if it sounds morbid, but if somebody missed three weeks because of COVID, who's the best player on the team favorite to win the division. And then you have somebody underneath getting four to one. One of those teams is going to hit. It reminds me of when the NFC East, when we knew

that the Dallas odds were too high. Sorry, I know it's still a sore subject, but you know certain NFL divisions where you're just like, well, wait a second. That team's a nine to one favorite to win the division. And like these two things could happen and they could win it. So I do think that with basketball,

there's a couple divisions. Because Portland's another one. They're 3-1 to win their division. Let me give you two teams around even odds to make the playoffs. And you tell me yes or no. The Atlanta Hawks. Houston Rockets.

I'll give you one more, actually. And Phoenix Suns. All about 115, 120. You can throw the Wizards in there, too. You have a big feeling about any of those? Yeah, I do, actually. I think Atlanta is going to be super disappointing. I don't like their team.

We're going to talk about this when me and Rousseau in-house do the over-under pod, but I think their team is like a fantasy team. It's not a basketball team. They're not going to talk about this when me and Rousseau and House do the over-under pod. But I just don't. I think their team is like a fantasy team. It's not a basketball team. They're not going to be able to get stops. I don't see it.

I like that Washington team. And their over-under for wins, I think, is like 32, 33, something like that. Everyone's very excited about Washington. They really are. But their over-under is basically, they're saying, can they go 34 and 38? 33 and a half, yep. Yeah, if Westbrook and Beal are, unless if both those guys stay healthy,

they're going to be a 500 team. So I like that one. What were the other two you had? You had, oh, Phoenix. Phoenix, yeah. I got to say, the one what are Memphis' odds to make the playoffs? Memphis to make the playoffs is... Yes is plus 184.

Yeah, see, I like that more than Phoenix. Because I think Phoenix, everybody's just penciling them in because they got Chris Paul. And meanwhile, as I said earlier, I think Ja's going to be a top 15 guy this year. So if you're going like... If the case for Phoenix is, well, they have Devin Booker and he's awesome. Well, Memphis has John Moran.

He's awesome. I like their team. They get along. It's this slightly playoff-tested team just because they had that elimination game in the bubble last year, which I think was a good experience for them. To me, that's a toss-up between Memphis and Phoenix.

I don't know why I'm asking that. I should be asking you which team I should stay away from for a we'll-make-the-playoffs parlay, because that's what kills me every year, right? The parlays. Atlanta. Yeah, no, but I wouldn't put one of them in there. I'd put like a minus 10-50, like the Nuggets in there,

and they'll blow it or something. You know what I mean? I have to figure out which of the good teams, the four or five, the teams you think are going to be a five or six seed just bail out and become like a 10. Well, in the East, there's a stay away team. Toronto? Yeah, but somebody in the East is going to fall out

and everybody's going to be surprised. Yeah, it could be Toronto. I'm worried about the Celtics. You are? I think it could be a weird Celtics season. Yeah, I think the over is too high. Because no Kemba for at least the first six weeks. No Hayward being replaced by all rookies.

Hayward was polarizing. And then Thompson's hurt to start the season. He's going to try to play, whatever. But I watched the whole preseason game on Friday and Tatum was in like that hot shit mode again, where it's like, he's taking pull up 27 footers and doing all the stuff that he stopped doing last year and just started going to the basket. You don't like that? It concerned me.

Yeah. Really? I don't want him to be like the, I'm an awesome superstar. I, you know, I could, I want him to go back to where he was last year where he's like grit and grind, get to the hoop, play basketball.

Maybe he's listening to this. Why don't you be a man? Put a eight to one odds that the Celtics don't make the playoffs. You said it yourself. Could be a short season. Yeah,

but I mean, it's going to be something. There's going to be a team that cashes that bet in where you, the other one I can't get over is the Clippers bet. I mean, it's going to be something. There's going to be a team that cashes that bet in. Where... The other one I can't get over is the Clippers being considered to be basically the number two favorite in the West.

I don't think they're the second best team in the West. Well, what's different? Montrezl, he's gone, so it's minus 6,000. They put Pera for Ibaka. The chemistry is still bad. They changed their coach coach they lost Shamit I don't know Kawhi's a year older

Paul George is still weird you know what I think Kawhi had a come to life moment on Jimmy Kimmel Live broke out of his shell our cousin got him he did the hand thing

that's right got going I recommend Portland and Memphis we'll talk about this yeah I like those we need like We'll talk about this. Yeah, I like those two. We need like 40 bets on this.

This is not enough. And for Rookie of the Year, I think LaMelo, I don't think anybody can, nobody's going to be like the runaway Rookie of the Year, so it's going to be a popular area contest. And LaMelo is going to do three things a game

that will trend on Twitter. He's been awful though. He can't shoot. Well, one of them is He's been awful though. He can't shoot. Well, one of them's not going to be shooting. He's going to be shooting 32%, but he'll get assistant rebounds and put together this popularity contest case, which I'm concerned about

if you're betting the other guys. Cole Anthony is kind of a sleeper. He's like 25 to 1, 20 to 1. 27, yeah. I think he might actually play for the Magic. I think he's looked good. And then who's the other one? Wiseman.

Well, Wiseman plus 750. You just talk about a guy who's definitely going to play, right? Seems like decent odds. And if you would have seen him and he had played for Memphis, you would have seen that he was the best out of this bunch. Well, the other thing is the Warriors love him.

Right. I mean, they're, they're like over the moon. They can't believe they got him. Let's put in money on quickly for a fantasy and to cheer him up a little bit. 27 to one. Poor fantasy, man. Rough way to start the pod, but it was fun having him. All right, Sal.

Good luck going for your night straight. Thank you. And, and I'll see you next week. Good job by you. All right. Good job by you. All right. Remember the schedule for me. We have another BS podcast going up Monday night. Me, Russel on house doing the annual NBA over-unders and then the

rewatchables. Me and Chris Ryan, Born Identity. That's going up Tuesday night and then I will have another podcast here on a, on Friday for you that, that I'm excited about. So there you go. We'll see you back here tomorrow night. Get your pens ready for NBA over-unders. Here we go. I want to see them on a way.

So I don't have feelings within. On the wayside, I never said I don't have feelings within.