The Bill Simmons Podcast - The Pats and Cowboys Suck, Fantasy Football Sucks, and Gambling Sucks With Cousin Sal | The Bill Simmons Podcast (Ep. 456)
Episode Date: December 17, 2018HBO and The Ringer's Bill Simmons is joined by Cousin Sal to wrap up a bad day of betting. They discuss Seahawks-49ers, Rams-Eagles, Patriots-Steelers, Cowboys-Colts, Chargers-Chiefs, and the playoff ...picture (2:20). Then they guess the NFL lines for Week 16, and bring in Bill's son, Ben, for this week's Parent Corner (51:10). Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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Con Air is... Kyle, have you seen Con Air? I've seen Con Air. Con Air this week. Con Air is...
Kyle, have you seen Con Air?
I've seen Con Air.
I've seen it.
So people think Godfather is the greatest movie ever made.
I think it's Con Air.
Really?
Yeah.
I think it's Con Air.
Do you talk about that on the pod?
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That's happening. Coming up,
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So stay tuned for that. First, our friends from Pearl Jam.
All right. The cause is on the line. I hate everything, Sal.
I hate absolutely everything.
I hate football.
I hated the last 11 hours.
I don't like what happened.
I don't know how to move forward.
Let's start there.
I don't know how to help you either.
This is one of those days where you watch football and you're like, I think this resembles the game I've been viewing for the last, you know, 40 years
or so, but nothing really
added up.
Your team, my team, that
atrocity we just watched on Sunday night,
I don't get it, and all our
money's gone.
And my fantasy season's
over. Oh, not so fast,
not so fast. And my Brady Belichick
era might be over. Other than that, it was a great
day.
We ordered from Castles.
Or Cassells? It's Castles?
I think it's Cassells, right? Cassells.
In LA. And I just had a patty melt.
I had a milkshake. I had some fries.
Oh, boy. Yeah, it was just one of those nights.
A lot of those things you're mentioning are
including free, I think. No, I didn't care.
I didn't care. I just't care. I just didn't.
I'm just
down. The quarterbacks were
really bad today, and what was weird was
Nick Foles
was really good, and
it actually got me thinking,
I don't know, if you're an Eagles fan, how do
you feel about this Nick Foles thing?
Yeah, I don't know
what to think about it other than
he seems to it's a weird thing i feel like i've seen the same play over and over a guy's right
in his face actually right on his arm like underneath his armpit and it not only doesn't
slow down his pass or you know but it's right on and that combined with the fact that the rams were
playing some kind of prevent defense i had never Seen before you could allow two
Wide receivers get 10 yards
Beyond the free safety and
The cornerback was covering the other wide receiver
That was a nice combination
For the Eagles tonight
Wow that's yeah I had them
Tied to everything every Pete teaser every
Moneyline parlay disgraceful
My plan was after the
Seahawks beat the Niners, I was
going to take the Eagles plus 13 because
I actually thought that line was too high.
It got to a point where it was like, alright, this is now ridiculous.
And I never got there
because
I don't even know where to start
with things I can't understand about today
but I think the single most inexplicable
game was
the Niners wanting to beat Seattle.
Forget about how bad Seattle was and all the different stupid ways they tried to lose that game.
But the Niners, they have really no incentive at all,
and they actually had a real chance to get the number one seed.
And they're celebrating like they won the Super Bowl, and I get it.
Sports is a competition.
But they have their third-string quarterback.
It's a pouring rain, and
they were playing like it was, honestly,
like the Super Bowl for them.
It was a credit to them. It was a credit to their coaching
staff, but all Seattle had to do was
win by a point, and they make the playoffs.
What was your explanation for that game?
Well, my explanation is I try to call
you off that if you text
exchange. I know. Like the Seahawks don't need it.
They're like two games up, a game and a half up on the wild card.
They did need it though.
They do need it.
They needed it.
Yeah.
Well now they need it.
They need the next one.
They needed the game.
They play Kansas City next week.
It was, they scored.
They're going to get in.
They're going to get in with a, a, a, well, I guess they didn't take it.
Yeah.
It's so funny when.
They'll get nine.
It's like, uh, like. Well, I guess eight and six. Yeah. It's so funny when it's like, uh,
like in the Netflix horror movies when in the first 20 minutes they go in the
attic and they find something and you just kind of know something's,
something's wrong. Like they found some chest.
The equivalent of that is when you bet on a team,
everything's going well and they missed the extra point and it's six,
nothing instead of 7-0.
That is the equivalent of the attic with the evil coins that you shouldn't touch.
Once that happens, I'm like, oh, no, here we go.
Next play, kickoff, Niners guys running back.
Jay Nikowski is the last guy in it,
and I don't even know how to describe what he did.
He looked like somebody who was trying to beat a car that was about to hit him.
Right.
And just like almost dove out of the way.
Like he didn't realize he could actually touch the guy.
We were talking about that.
And you don't see kickers have back-to-back bad plays.
Because if you miss a field goal, you don't kick off, you know?
So he misses the extra point.
And then, I don't know.
Yeah, he's got 200 pounds on him. Just,
just lay down on the field. Um, and you're fine. He was like,
he was like sitting on the bench by the time the guy scored, ran that back.
It was like, he didn't want to get hurt. Right. And, uh, I don't know. I,
I, they made the PATs more exciting a couple of years ago.
They moved them back. I now hate them more than ever. Like,
just get rid of them. Let's just do two point across the board. It feels like half the time
these guys are missing the PATs. I know that's not the actual stat, but. Right. I want to do,
that's one of the things I want to ask God when I go to heaven and you better believe I'm going
to heaven. But when I go, I want to ask, Hey, with these missed extra points, as far as my gambling goes, I'm on the wrong side way more than the right side.
Why am I on the wrong side 90% of the time?
Right.
I just need that answer.
And then wherever you want to send me, that's fine.
Who was the guy?
I watched so much football the last two days.
It all blended together.
Who was the guy who missed two extra points?
The Jets guy?
Yeah, it was the Jets guy.
Yeah, Myers.
And they were just singing his praises
and I had checked his stats too.
I was like, wow,
in our fantasy league.
I was like,
nobody has this guy
and he's the number one
kicker in the league.
He's a free agent.
Much better than last year.
And then, yeah,
then he missed two extra points.
I pick against the Texans
every week.
Sometimes I gamble against them.
And every week
they beat me
and I'm even more convinced
next week is going to be
the week when I'm going
to beat them.
If you watch that Jets game closely,
the Texans somehow covered.
They were favored by like, what, six?
They covered. They won by
seven.
I have no idea how they won by seven.
I watched the whole game. It honestly
seemed like the Jets were controlling the game
and the Texans made a couple of big plays, but
they couldn't run the ball.
Hopkins had to make these superhuman plays just to keep them around.
Man, that was frustrating.
And you kept thinking,
it's one thing if Darnold throws his pick,
this seems like a nice spot
middle of the fourth quarter where he does it.
He didn't.
He actually did well.
One of his better games, I think.
Yeah, I liked how he played.
He's not there yet
because he doesn't have weapons.
And it's really hard to tell how good he is But I was impressed
He's got a little spirit to him
He definitely has a little charisma
I'm not wavering on my Barkley over Darnold thing
But I'd say at least I'm a little worried about it
I've been wrong about everything else
Man, that Giants thing was very strange
Talk about a team that didn't
They played like a team playing for the number one draft pick right there.
Like, someone must have smacked them and said,
hey, what are we doing here?
We want to end up in the top five.
Didn't even score a point.
Eli's been pretty consistently abominable,
but then he'll have little stretches when he's not abominable,
and then people are like, Oh, Eli, you know, and it's,
and then he'll have entire games when he's abominable.
Well, I'm not saying I fight with a lot of people about this.
I think he's rookie there for sure. Offensive.
He's not an MVP,
but that this is a good indication of what happens when he can't get out.
When he gets bottled up in 31 rushing, I think like 20, 25 receiving, and they scored zero points.
Not even like don't compete a little bit, but nothing.
Not even close.
There was some really bad offense.
In fact, the early games today were, I don't even think we had one close one.
Right?
Everything was pretty much wrapped up.
Packers-Bears was threatening to be maybe close,
but it ended up not being close.
Somehow I get set.
We get seven screens the way we arrange it,
and Bills-Lions wasn't on one of them,
and the Redskins game wasn't on one of them.
I think those were the two best or at least closest games.
Yeah, the Bills won but didn't cover.
Josh Allen is just flat out
exciting
it's like having
we always wonder
what would happen
if a running black
played quarterback
and now we get to
find out every week
with him
I actually enjoy
watching him
the games are bad
I start him in
like daily fantasy now
and don't even
give it a second thought
really
yeah
he's good
so
from a quarterback
standpoint
if the listeners are like,
why aren't they talking about the Cowboys and the Patriots?
Because I'm not ready yet.
I'm not ready to talk about it.
I'm just trying to duck it.
From a quarterback standpoint, the ones today, if you go through,
I mean, really the mediocrity has never been more apparent.
I don't know if it was a cold weather thing or what,
but Goff was somebody that I felt like was now upper echelon.
Remember, he was kind of lingering in the MVP conversation a little bit.
I felt like he single-handedly lost that game for them today.
He was so bad.
He made so many bad throws.
He missed open receivers left and right and just looked nervous.
And their defense obviously wasn't that good either,
but the plays were there.
It was like he was afraid to go deep, and then when he had receivers,
he wasn't always hitting them, and he was really sloppy with the ball.
He threw for 339 yards, threw 54 times, did not have a touchdown.
Two picks.
And two really bad picks, actually.
One of them was like a junior high school pick.
I tweeted that Jared Goff
is playing quarterback
like a guy named Jared Goff would play quarterback.
It was really, really bad.
And I was thinking,
wow, I wonder if Foles is better than Wentz.
I'm like, wow, Foles might be better is better than Wentz. I'm like, wow,
Foles might be better than Goff too.
I don't know what I'm watching here,
but this is,
this is really something else.
But yeah,
that play where his,
the center stepped on his foot and then he's going down and he was almost
down.
Like he would have been out of the play.
They would add a punt.
And then he just like flings it and it gets intercepted.
Like,
oh,
this is definitely the Eagles night.
Give me a live money line here.
I don't know what know what's going on.
Then Gurley gets hurt.
It was a big mess.
I think the one thing I'm going to file away for next year
is don't do any parlays in Week 15.
Just don't.
Week 15?
Yeah, Week 15, just don't.
Seems like weird stuff happens.
Meanwhile, every favorite won early on.
You talk about those early games?
Every single favorite won.
Not in cover, but one.
Then you get to the late afternoon, Seahawks lose to the Niners,
and your Patriots lose, and now the Rams.
So the last three were the only dogs to win.
And those were all, I would say, three of the six or seven best teams.
Yeah, and that's where everyone got their money.
Where did the Patriot line end up at?
Patriot line ended up, it was a solid three.
Man, I mean, it is crazy.
I've been saying this for weeks,
and people think I've been too negative with the Pats,
about the Pats this year.
Now I guess not.
I guess they know what I was talking about.
The Pats aren't very good,
and we're going to talk about them in a second,
but the Steelers ran all over them
with their third string running back today.
And they had a drive that started at the one yard line
and it was, dude, Samuels is a fifth rounder
and Steven Ridley, who I got to be honest,
I didn't know really was still in the NFL.
And it seems like we waived him 20 years ago.
He just came back to play against the Patriots.
He's gone.
Don't let him go now.
I think he, I mean, he was so far gone when he was in the Patriots.
Like I think he roomed with Aaron Hernandez in like 2011.
It was just crazy to watch the Steelers run over them
because it really seemed like Roethlisberger was hurt.
I mean, the ball was sailing all over the place with them.
Yeah, I think Le'Veon Bell takes yet another hit
in his new contract negotiations
with whichever team he ends up with.
But yeah, Samuels, like you said,
I don't even think he had 20 carries, but 140 yards.
And they were good, but what continues to shock me
is why can't guys like gronk get open
like i the hogan play for the touchdown is one that that's that's patriot football that's what
i think i see more but why isn't gronk getting open why didn't like white drop a pat there was
just some weird weird things that the patriots don't normally do um well first of all edelman
had two massive drops in that game.
And Gordon had one too, right?
Gordon had a big drop, but Edelman had two uncharacteristic kind of drive-killing drops.
And when I FaceTimed my dad during the game and he was bitching, he was like, Edelman,
two drops.
But he was right.
I mean, they really killed the momentum and they were the kind of plays that he's been
making for most of his career before he got hurt.
The Gronk thing though,
I think that ship has pretty much
sailed. I think it is what it is now.
He can't get separation anymore.
This was the worst out of all of them. I know you've been saying
it for months. He can't get open anymore.
He can still
catch the ball in traffic and
he can still, if he's open,
can get it and turn around and the safety dives at his legs and he just goes
down. But the, uh, the days of runaway freight train Gronk are long gone.
And they, you know, this is, if you watched every Patriot game this year,
this is how he played today was how he's played the whole season.
They do,
they did take them out of the garage in the second half and tried to run some
plays of them. But you know, there's some weird stuff going on. James White
was so important in the first
eight to ten games.
Now it's this three running back rotation
again. There's a lot of Rex Burkhead
and his 4-8-40. That's weird.
Gordon,
this was the first
really big road game that he's
played in and he wasn't
available today, apparently. Yeah. If you thought, like I road game that he's played in, and he wasn't available today, apparently.
Yeah.
If you thought, like I told you before the game,
hey, Steelers only scoring 17 points, how much are we putting on the pads?
Yeah.
I think you'd be right there with me for a while.
Yeah.
I mean, everybody's scoring in the Steelers and moving the ball,
but the elephant in the room is Brady, who has been a B-minus this year.
He's had hour-long stretches where he's looked really good,
but for the most part has not really been that good.
And it was hard to tell the difference between the weapons that he had available
versus the consistency of his play.
But I got to say, today was the first day that I really felt like
he looked like a 41 year old quarterback, not in the sense of like, from a talent standpoint,
didn't seem like he wanted to get hit today. Yeah. There were, there were plays when he was
jerking his body away from pass rushes that weren't even really there. You know, he, he just
seemed for lack of a better word, jittery.
And this is a guy who, I'm going to say, you know, what was that,
Denver AFC title game, 2000.
It was the year before they beat Atlanta when they lost in Denver.
And he just took an insane amount of punishment in that game.
He must have been hit 35 times in that game.
And I think he had a concussion.
And he just kept staying in the pocket and taking the hits.
Doesn't seem like he's as interested in taking the hits anymore.
And I don't blame him.
He's had an unbelievable career.
He's been around for two decades.
And he's made a ton of money.
But this was the first game where I really felt like he just wasn't staying
in there.
And he was a lot of throwing balls, falling back.
I mean, that last play, the game-ending play,
he kind of had Edelman open, and he just fell to the side and winged it,
and it was terrible.
All three of those passes were terrible.
Well, if you look at his numbers, they're not going to be as bad as –
I don't know.
He has 4,000 yards almost, I think, right now.
He'll end up with probably 4,500.
Nine interceptions is high for him, I think, for sure.
But he'll end up with probably 4,500. Nine interceptions is high for him, I think, for sure. But he'll end up with 28, 29 touchdown passes.
Well, I think what we've seen...
That much worse.
You know, I watched the whole Packers game today.
And Rodgers, he has that interception streak
where he had to throw an interception forever.
And he was like eight for eight in that game.
If you watch that game carefully, he didn't play that well.
And he missed open guys.
He had guys. He missed a touchdown when it should have been... Yeah, Rodgers. Oh, God, yeah. game if you watch that game carefully he didn't play that well and he missed open guys he had
guys he missed a touchdown when it should have been rogers yeah rogers he should have been seven
seven he missed the guy who was open instead at seven three he missed another guy for a touchdown
he missed some deep balls and he's another guy who doesn't seem like he really is that interested in
getting hit and uh there might be, 12 guys now in the playoffs
I'd want starting in the playoffs more than Aaron Rodgers.
I had the Bears' money line today.
I was never really worried that he was going to come back.
He didn't have a terrible game.
And the reason I brought him up was because
you talked about how Brady's going to throw for 4,000 yards.
I think, if this is right, it says Brady has 3,700 and Rodgers has 3,700.
I think that was before today.
That was before today.
So they're right around 4,000.
It's got close to 4,000, Brady.
Yeah.
And Brady was heading into today 23 TDs, 8 picks.
Rodgers is 23 TDs, 1 pick.
But if you actually watch them play in, play out,
it's certainly not a vintage
season for either of them to say the least.
No.
And I thought Brady really hurt the past today.
The drops hurt him.
No question.
But, um, he was not good.
And the coaching was really bad too.
I just, I thought they were going to come out in that, uh, no huddle attack, attack,
attack, use James White.
Where was James White today?
That was weird, too.
James White, you know, people were talking about him.
He was the best kind of third down back the Pats have ever had.
He's been kind of pushed out.
So it was this guy.
I think Brady got 1,000 yards rushing.
What was that, last week, the week before?
And that's it.
That's all he's ever wanted.
1,000 quarterback sneaks. They had a chance to end the Steelers today. It was that, last week, the week before? And that's it. That's all he ever wanted. A thousand quarterback sneaks.
They had a chance to end the Steelers today.
It was sitting there.
They had a chance to end the Steelers.
That was done. The Steelers were going
home. The interception that he threw
was really especially
reprehensible and very un-Brady-like.
And it wasn't
great. Let's take a break and talk about
your team.
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And since we're here, The Ringer has been putting up a whole bunch of best of 2018 stuff on the
website, podcast videos, whole bunch of videos.
We've been putting up actually,
we have a really nice series about our staffers favorite stuff from 2018.
So check that out as well, wherever you get your ringer content.
All right.
So if we learned anything about week 15,
it was that all the teams that were having smoke
blowing up their rectums
could not handle all the smoke in their rectum.
And I would include the Dallas Cowboys on that list.
Oh, we don't have you.
Why don't you do another read?
Read another ad.
We don't have to talk about it.
We'll do another one?
Yeah, do a couple more.
Let's talk about rectum smokers.
It is the new smoke up the ass app.
So you got shut out.
It was really bad for gamblers before going to Cowboys.
Yeah.
You were going to have the Chiefs and the Rams, right?
We're going to have the Chiefs and the Rams probably both every week.
So we got slaughtered.
But I did think the Cowboys, I did not think they'd lose 23-0.
But I was a firm believer in this whole, we don't need this game, and God knows Jason Garrett is
not going to get the Cowboys up for a game they don't need, and it's going to show.
But, you know, there was some nice things that, you know, the defense hadn't allowed
a first quarter touchdown since week seven.
That was out early.
The Prescott, that pass and the drop on the, was it third and goal,
and then they went for it on fourth and goal,
that little out route to the fullback, that was bad.
And then Zeke gets bottled up.
But, yeah, bad, bad, bad offensive performance.
Not fun watching Dak out there trying to move the ball.
And the Colts are all right.
They ran all over the Cowboys.
Marlon Mack is good.
T.Y. Hilton gets open almost every play.
I don't know what to say other than, you know,
Zeke Elliott says we need this.
This is going to be great for us.
So a couple more shutouts and think of how great that will be.
Then we'll be really set.
I had a –
Before, like the cowboys going into this
were um eight and five right yeah and you had the eagles who were in 13 point underdog and the
redskins who are seven point underdog which division is going to take care of itself both
those teams win and now it's uh now you have to win a game or two. The good news is you're home for Tampa
next week. Yeah. And then you're
playing at Giants Stadium
in week 17. Right.
That is setting up for
that
could be a fun game. At the Giants?
Well, because...
Yeah, guess what? The Giants fans will be real excited
to knock you out of the playoffs. Oh, yeah.
They'll be showing up in force.
And you have the whole Saquon thing to worry about because he is the guy.
He's almost like the Anthony Davis type NBA player.
Like at any game, he could have 48 points and 20 rebounds.
Right.
You just don't know when it is and you hope it's not your day.
It's interesting though.
Washington and Philly play in week 17.
So they're both 7-7.
Washington's at Tennessee.
Philly's home for Houston.
And then they play each other
in Washington in week 17.
If the Cowboys
beat Tampa, Philly can't catch
the Cowboys, I don't think.
Can Washington catch them, though?
Washington, I don't know where that tiebreaker goes,
because they're both 9-7, you're saying?
What if it's a three-way?
I guess it can't be, because Washington.
Yeah, yeah, it's impossible for.
Yeah, but you're right.
If it goes Cowboys-Giants and they need that game,
you're going to see Odell's going to play,
no matter what kind of injury he's been nursing the last month or so.
And that's going to be a very tough road game to win.
And then New Orleans now in the driver's seat for the one seed.
Yeah. They are at Carolina Monday
night and then home for Pittsburgh and home for Carolina.
Rams are at
Zona, home for San Francisco.
The Rams really pooped the bed in this.
This is everybody's
beatable week, right? This is what we learn.
Usually you learn something, take something from
every week. Everybody's beatable.
I will say Collinsworth made a great point.
He was talking about how the Rams are just starting to get banged up now.
And they don't have a lot of depth because of the way they approached this season
where they kind of went all in on these guys.
And he made the point, like, this is why Belichick, you know,
year after year after year, he cares about the depth more than going all in on guys.
Because injuries happen every year,
and by week 16, 17, 18,
you're not playing the best 22 guys in your team anymore.
You're now dipping into the next 15 guys.
Right.
And I don't know enough about the Rams personnel
to have an opinion on what kind of danger zone they're in right now.
But I do know that they don't have anyone even remotely close to Gurley when
he's banged up.
And,
and,
you know,
they miss Cooper cup.
I actually thought that's the big thing.
Yeah.
They haven't been the same since he's been out.
They haven't.
And then defensively,
you know,
we always say this with football.
You just need to kind of get it going in January.
But they look a lot more vulnerable than I expected.
I'm disappointed in Wade Phillips.
I don't know.
And especially with a keep to lead back in the last couple weeks.
I don't know what that team is doing defensively.
Like, they're not applying any pressure that you would think against these teams.
Against Foles.
Like, get them rattled. I don't know what the hell.
It's the run games that
you look at the Eagles, they just have
I would say one of the worst
running back crews in the league.
They're running the ball on the rims.
It's embarrassing. Wendell Smallwood?
Did you trade Chris Carson? He ends up being a pivotal
player in our fantasy playoffs now.
I guess.
He wouldn't have helped me today.
He helped the other team.
He's going to be mad at you.
No, he really shouldn't be.
This is it.
I know I say this every year, but I really think this is it.
I think I'm done.
I had the best fantasy team I've had in 11 years,
and right now every guy on my team has played,
and I'm at 62.5 points.
Well, hold on. But that's not saying the whole story. You had 62.55. Your opponent is at 62.5.
He has Drew Brees. It's not over yet. It's not over yet. If Drew Brees gets kidnapped
before tomorrow by aliens, I have a chance. Or if he's warming up before the game and something pops in his elbow.
It's really fantasy miracle time.
But I'm not the only one who got murdered by this.
This is why fantasy football is so stupid.
I had Adam Thielen and Keenan Allen who had a combined two points.
I had Jared Goff who threw for 340 yards and somehow had 15 points.
I had George Cato at 5 points I had Damian Williams on my bench
For 24 points
I just hate fantasy football Sal
I don't want to do it, I don't enjoy it
Why do I do it?
What's fun about it?
You ran a poll that said
I know this wouldn't have mattered either
But you asked
And it was more of a humble brag
Look I got Phillip Rivers
I got Tom Brady
I got Jared Goff I got Tom Brady. No, it was not a humble brag.
I got Jared Goff.
Who should I start?
You didn't know who to start.
I didn't know who to start out of those three.
And then the public told you to start Philly Rivers,
and you didn't do it.
Yeah, but he only had like 21 points.
It was a seven-point difference.
I would have been able to watch the first quarter tomorrow.
I hate fantasy football.
I put up, me and Hench had the two best teams this year.
Neither of us are going to break 70.
Yeah.
It's embarrassing.
Screw this.
Screw this fake sport.
I'm just, I'm in for daily fantasy now.
That's it.
It is bad.
I'm turning my soul over to FanDuel.
By the way, speaking of Todd Gurley,
the greatest fantasy player that was traded away in our league,
what is he doing not getting out of bounds there?
Two players didn't get out of bounds in that last drive.
Is he really cutting it in thinking he's going to score there?
What was that?
What do you think the Eagles could get for Wentz?
Could they get two firsts for him?
Oh, I don't know.
I don't know.
By the way.
Cowboys might take him
from two first.
All I have,
the Eagles took,
they took my Super Bowl.
Their fans are obnoxious
and now my team
isn't going to win
the Super Bowl this year either.
All I have is,
is to start fake
Wentz trade rumors.
I'm just going to create
a series of fake email accounts
and just go on
different Reddit sites
and pretend I know people
when I'm hearing this.
I just want to cause tension.
I would trade Wentz.
Yeah, do that.
The Raiders offered two ones.
They have four ones.
They offered two for Wentz.
That's pretty good.
Hey, Wentz can't stay in the field.
Nick Foles has God with him.
He's like the guy in Hoosiers.
He does the prayer before he goes in.
What was that guy's name?
Not Fletch.
Strap.
Strap.
He has his hand in the huddle a little extra,
and then he goes, he's crashing the boards because God's with him.
Nick Foles, God behind him, man.
You can't stop that.
I don't know.
They look like a different team.
They turn the gambling gods on me.
That's for sure.
They look like a different team.
Kevin Clark has this weird theory that Kevin Clark,
I'm sure he's talking about this on the Ring Around NFL show,
that when there's a 15% chance for something to happen,
that's usually like the sign it's actually going to happen.
And the Eagles had a 15% chance to make the playoffs heading into that game.
Oh, wow.
He said his other cases were Donald Trump,
the Pats being down 28 to three in the Super Bowl,
and there was like three others.
But he was like, it's his 15% chance.
Is he saying exactly 15?
It has to be 15%.
If the win probability or the odds or whatever is 15%,
that means it's going to happen.
Is he keeping track of the other times it loses?
Like, overwhelming? He doesn't talk about those times.
All right.
He just talks about when it happens.
By the way, as we're taping this,
the Miss Universe pageant is on Fox right now,
and Steve Harvey's hosting.
Oh, is he really?
How?
Steve Harvey had the biggest screw-up
in the history of television on this show.
Yeah.
And don't you lose your job for that?
No, that's the only reason anyone's tuning in
is if he does it again, right?
You know why I put it on?
Because nephew Kyle, his on-again, off-again girlfriend,
who for some reason it's now on again,
she just left and the Pat's lost
and he's a little down in the dumps.
And what's really keeping his spirits up right now-
It's Ms. Venezuela.
Ms. Venezuela is really keeping his spirits up, yeah. Yeah's Miss Venezuela. Miss Venezuela is really keeping his spirits up.
Yeah, but they don't want to.
They wear, like, trench coats now, right?
You don't ever see any of them.
Yeah, well, the trench coat competition,
they just had it, actually.
It was great.
Yeah, Miss Venezuela got the highest score.
Harry, on Against the Laws last week
or a couple weeks ago,
gave out Miss Thailand at, like, 30-1.
And when she went down to 16-1,
he considered it a huge victory.
But I don't think she was even close to placing in it.
He had thoughts on the Miss Universe pageant?
Yeah, he did a little more research than he probably should have.
How do you research the Miss Universe pageant?
I don't know.
He has some affliction with thailand i think you liked it we went out
we all went out to dinner to celebrate uh the against all odds years you were gracious enough
to take out the producers and a couple other people and then uh and then harry told us the
story of how your friend ken fired him and then rehired him and fired him. And they were on the
phone for 10 straight hours. And we talked about this probably for 45 minutes straight at dinner,
trying to figure out how two grown men could be on the phone together for 10 hours. And we didn't
come up with a resolution is why I bring it up. I should let you know, I approached Ken with this
and I told him it was 10 and he was very upset that Harry's
going around telling people it was 10 when it was seven hours.
It was seven hours.
I want to make that clarification.
These two grown men spoke on the phone for seven hours.
They're friends from college.
One works for the other now, but they yelled at each other for seven hours.
And one was in Hawaii.
And then, yeah.
And then Ken was upset that you talked about this on your podcast.
Yeah, right.
But now we're talking about it on my podcast too.
Right.
So now he's going to be really upset.
He's going to be even more upset when we hit the parent corner future,
but you'll like it.
So anyway, that was a highlight,
and I'm glad I should have had Harry on to talk about the Miss Universe thing.
Do you have a great call of the week?
I don't know if it's great, but I think, do you want to set this up?
Yeah, sure.
I'll set it up.
Whatever.
Crown Royal is doing something pretty cool this football season.
They launched a responsible drinking campaign called the Water Break.
It's about encouraging people to hydrate between drinks for a better experience,
whether at the game, watching at home, or in the bar.
Have a great time.
Enjoy some crown.
Don't be that person.
That ruins it for everyone.
We've all seen that guy who drank too much watching the game.
Make the right call.
Take a water break.
What do you got for the right call this week?
Well, the right call, the wrong call is not going to,
and I like this all the time when a team changes offensive coordinators,
the next game they usually break out.
And that's what the freaking Vikings did.
41-17, they beat the Dolphins.
My right call goes to the Vikings front office.
They get rid of John DeFilippo.
They replace him with Kevin Stefanski.
They love this guy.
He's been the quarterback coach for a while.
They stopped him from going with Pat Shermer to the Giants.
36 years old.
He's going to be a head coach in the league next year.
He'll probably go to the Browns or the Jets, maybe the Bucs,
but he's very good with young quarterbacks.
And the Vikings front office, they get my good call of the week.
Probably should have been on the Vikings today.
So bad. I had a little on the Dolph I probably should have been on the Vikings today. So bad.
I had a little on the Dolphins, not knowing that Kenny Stills was out.
The line was so high, I got suspicious,
and I had to throw a little toke of parlay.
So bad watching Tannehill.
My right call of the week goes to myself.
We were at a party.
You were there.
It was Wednesday night.
Thursday night.
No, Wednesday night, our agent, James Babydoll Dixon was Wednesday night. Thursday night. No, Wednesday night.
Our agent, James Babydoll Dixon.
Wasn't it Wednesday night?
What do you mean?
Oh, that party.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Okay.
Wednesday night, all the extended Kimmel family was at this.
It was a work party.
Who had the party?
What do you mean?
Who was there?
Jimmy's production partner.
Yeah.
Wheelhouse.
Yeah. Wheelhouse. Wheelhouse. Yeah, Wheelhouse.
Mm-hmm.
So we're hanging out with James Babydoll Dixon.
He's had a couple.
Mm-hmm.
You see Maverick Carter coming toward us, LeBron's business partner.
He hasn't even reached our circle yet, and Babydoll's probably three people away.
And I think I said it to you.
If it wasn't you, it was somebody else, but I think I said it to you. If it wasn't you, it was somebody else.
But I'm pretty sure it was you.
Wasn't you?
Or maybe it was Louis.
I don't know.
What'd you say?
I predicted that Babydoll would tell Maverick Carter
that they've met before,
get upset when Maverick Carter couldn't remember meeting him before,
and then spend the next three minutes berating him. how, no, no, you remember, you remember, and just go over and
over again how they'd met before, which is a move that he's done over and over again,
most famously with Oprah Winfrey and Jimmy Kimmel's dressing room that time.
Can you do that story before I continue this one?
All I remember from that is he was trying to get in Oprah's good graces and said uh you met me before right i was with john stewart the other game we play is how long
it takes for him when he's talking to someone important uh before he brings up john stewart
uh so it's usually about 18 19 seconds but you remember me baby i was on with john stewart i
brought him by yeah i represent him okay yeah i represent him and he's like all right okay
oh the other thing is i'm going to africa this summer and she's like well what do we well why
would i care you make schools there and stuff right so yeah that's his typical uh greeting to
celebrities so he introduces himself to maverick maverick says hey maverick makes the fatal mistake
of saying hey it's nice to meet you, which sets Baby off.
And he does the, no, no, we've met before.
We met before like three years ago, it starts.
And Maverick is LeBron's business partner.
He meets a lot of people.
And Baby, for some reason, thinks that when he meets people,
it's this life-altering experience.
And they can remember the time and the place
and all the circumstances around it. So then the next three minutes were him explaining to maverick
the last time they met which i'm pretty sure is the second most boring conversation you can hear
anybody have other than complaining about their fantasy team which i just did 10 minutes ago
so i don't have a point my point is my red call of the week was being able to sense it before it even developed.
I saw Maverick wasn't even over yet.
And I knew what baby was going to do.
And I was really proud of myself.
Poor Maverick.
And by the way, this goes to anyone out there.
It's so easy.
All you have to do is say, nice to see you.
And that covers everything.
Like, oh, yeah, nice to see you. Yeah, nice to see you leaves it open covers everything. Like, oh yeah, nice to see you.
Nice to see you leaves it open that you might
have met them before. They have met you. Maybe this is
the first time we're meeting. It's fine.
Covers everything. Well, my issue is I basically
have meeting Alzheimer's. I have no idea
who I met and I barely remember what I did
six hours ago. But somehow I can remember
all of Larry Bird's 125
best games. I don't know what's wrong with my brain.
Anyway.
Well, it was a good call.
Crown Royal reminds everyone this football season
to take a water break, hydrate responsibly,
and then to nod when Baby Doll Dixon says to you,
we've met before.
Just say, oh yeah, I remember that.
And that's it.
You don't have to listen to it for the next three minutes.
So there you go.
I like it.
Let's quickly go over
the playoff picture.
Right.
Houston is now
the two seed, Sal.
Yeah,
that's got to
be rough for you.
Houston's going to get
a fucking bye.
They suck.
The Pats suck too,
but Houston,
Jesus.
Well,
they won 10 of 11.
What do they do?
They won 10 of 11.
What do they do?
Yeah.
They have one receiver
and a pass rush and the quarterback can scramble around
every once in a while.
Congratulations.
That's more than you do, right?
You're Patriots.
Well, we have five Super Bowl banners last time I checked.
Oh, I know.
There's a lot of glee right now about the fall of the Patriots.
And it reminds me of the scene at the end of This Boy's Life with Leo DiCaprio,
your favorite actor. Yeah. When he drives away with Ellen Barkin, they finally escape the abusive
stepfather played by Robert De Niro. And they leave and he stands on the porch and he screams,
you'll remember me. You'll remember me. That's how I feel about the Patriots. You'll remember us.
That's how Babydoll was with Maverick
Carr.
Just in a New York accent.
So Casey is...
When do we see New England play? I think I watched
it with you at my house, but when
was the last time they played? They'll get a Saturday
night game. I know I shouldn't count
them out as a buy. They could still get a buy easily.
But if they're a three seed, when was the last time they played that first weekend?
Usually they get the Saturday night.
I think they played, man, I don't remember.
I thought they've had a buy every week for like nine years.
But that Saturday night might have been a second round game we're remembering.
Yeah.
It's usually not a good sign if we can't get a buy.
That means something's gone wrong.
So they're the three seed right now.
Pittsburgh is 8-5-1.
So they are a
half game back at New Orleans home
since the Chargers still with
a puncher's chance of maybe
I don't know, maybe
getting the one seed here. Because if
Kansas City loses to Seattle this week,
the Chargers beat Baltimore at home. The Chargers are now the one seed. So they're Kansas City loses to Seattle this week, the Chargers beat Baltimore at home.
The Chargers are now the one seed.
Five to one.
We didn't talk about that. That was one of my worst
gambling losses. I was stuck in traffic
pulling up to the Ringer party Thursday night
and I'm watching
on my phone and I just threw the phone
into the backseat. I didn't know if anyone
was there. But I was so mad
at that game. I'm not betting against them the rest of the year.
They seem to get going when they're down
in a way that is usually a good sign for the playoffs.
When they're down.
How about when Keenan Allen, the best receiver, is out?
Oh, my.
What are the odds with that in play?
That was really when my fantasy season ended,
when he tried to catch a ball over his head and landed.
When the receiver immediately grabs their hip
and starts running like Fred Sanford,
it's usually a bad sign.
Their hip is a bad one, yeah.
But yeah, that Mike Williams was incredible in that game.
Pushed off a little towards the end.
I got to say,
I got to say, Rivers,
wow. We were talking, we talked, I saw you Wednesday night, I got to say Rivers. Wow.
I saw you Wednesday night, and we talked about Rivers MVP,
and it was like 22 to 1.
And we went through the whole thing.
And you still think Breeze is going to win regardless.
But I don't know.
This could be the Rivers season.
It's nice odds now that you have good value in that.
But he's not passing.
But Brees has like eight, nine percentage better
for a completion percentage.
Do you think...
One less loss.
Do you think Rivers is going to announce when he's done playing?
What do you mean?
Do you think it'll just happen?
No, it struck me.
I was watching SportsCenter that night,
and they interviewed him.
He's got a really good personality
and he's really candid. There's something about him.
I was thinking about him versus
I saw a lot of Jason
Witten interviews over the last 12 years.
You're thinking of a replacement in the
ESPN booth? No, I never watched
Jason Witten and thought to myself,
wow, that guy would be really fun
to listen to him call a game.
Rivers, I think, would be really good at it if he threw himself into it.
He's got a good personality.
I'm saying like five years ago. Why are we even talking about that?
He's one of the top quarterbacks right now.
Yeah, but I'm just looking for replacements.
Oh, yeah.
The other guy.
It sounds like half a joke when you say it,
but having eight kids and saying, oh, nothing phases him.
He has eight kids.
Yeah.
Yeah, there's something to that.
Yeah.
He kind of plays like a guy
with eight kids.
He doesn't care what's going on around him.
Uh-oh, Bobby fell off the jungle gym.
He'll be fine.
Wipe off the blood, Bobby.
Yeah, let me sidearm
another 30-yard touchdown here.
Yeah, I was thinking about announcers
because Romo's been such a revelation.
He was fun to do the Pats game today, by the way.
And then yesterday, Nate Burleson was fantastic.
Yeah.
That first team, was it Mariucci was the third guy?
Yes, it was, yeah.
Very enjoyable.
Really, I thought Nate was excellent,
especially considering that was his first time.
It would be nice to get some new blood.
I have a feeling like you're just not allowed to get fired once you get an announcing job, basically.
Right.
It's like being a tenured professor.
I don't know how long.
God bless Dick Stockton and some of these guys, but I don't know how long we have to have the same announcers.
Let's get some new blood in there.
Well, speaking of not being able to fire anybody,
you wanted to, I don't know if you still want to,
but you threatened to defend Stephen A. Smith on this podcast.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's great.
Go ahead.
That's good.
Should we take a break first?
I don't care.
Whatever you want to do.
Yeah, let's take a break, and then I'm going to defend Stephen A.
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All right.
Yeah, we were talking about Stephen A, how he screwed up with the Chiefs and the Chargers game and did this breakdown.
And he had a linebacker who wasn't in the Chiefs anymore covering a tight end who was out for the season.
It was a problem.
I'm not going to lie.
But listen, I've kind of gone up and down on Stephen A. over the years.
And I think the last couple of years, I think he has hit a zone where he is one of the most entertaining sports media personalities of all time.
I cannot believe that he can go on the last 15 minutes of Get Up, go on First Take and do that show, which is really hard to talk in those long monologues for two plus hours. Then he goes right
to a radio show. He does his own radio show by himself for another two hours. And then he's
available to do boxing.
He's available to go on location for every NBA playoff game.
He's at the finals.
The guy is like a take machine.
And my point is every once in a while,
you're going to get some names messed up or forget something,
or maybe try to cheat one game that you weren't able to prepare for.
And,
and I,
I think the man deserves some slack
alright
I'd buy that but and I'd buy that
anyone like I do five hours
of live sports talk
television a week and I
certainly swallow my words
probably once a day but
to get four things wrong
makes you think that at first I thought
like a researcher was screwing with him.
And just like, hey, I'm going to hand him this from 2016.
Because it would have made sense from 2016.
Maybe that's what happened.
Sir Jonathan Hensler Henry.
He said San Diego Chargers, whatever.
Everyone says that.
Spencer Ware.
But then to defend it...
First of all, he only defended one of them.
He said, oh, no, no.
All right, so I said Hunter Henry.
I meant Virgil Green.
Virgil Green? Virgil Green?
Who is that?
That guy is not having a good year either.
What are you talking about?
Yeah.
Who is he anyway?
Is that Ted DiBiase's guy?
I don't even know who that is.
But I don't know.
I don't know.
It just seems, yeah, I agree with you.
I think he's spread too thin.
And what are they going to make him do MMA too when the UFC goes to ESPN?
Maybe he doesn't have to do everything.
ESPN has people in holding deals that aren't doing anything.
They give him a million dollars.
So why do you have to have him on 17 different shows?
Can I make a counter?
Of course, yeah.
It's really fun to watch David on TV.
Only when he's doing things like he did last week.
He comes on the last 15 minutes of Get Up and he pulls out the Jalen on TV
that I want on TV.
I see. All right.
I really, I really,
he has a way of tapping into people
and getting them fired up.
He is the master now, the dramatic pause.
He does the-
The dramatic everything. Yeah.
I'm going to do the Stephen A. dramatic pause right now.
Don't think that my microphone cut out.
Let me tell you something right now, Sal Iacono.
Phillip Rivers!
And then he just goes.
He really knows how to use silence
as a weapon. Do you think he's taking a
nap in the dramatic pause? Because he is
spread thin, like you said.
He doesn't have any time to himself.
If every once in a while
he has a massive screw-up
and gets made fun of
for 24 hours,
I still think it's worth
the risk of having
Stephen A. on TV
for seven hours a day.
I got you.
I should have taken
a dramatic pause
between Spencer Ware
and Hunter Henry
somewhere in there.
Thought about it.
I think I used to joke
in the mid-2000s
that at one point
ESPN was going to have
a channel that was just Stephen A. Smith
in all caps. It might
actually happen.
No, I think
he's their best guy.
Oh, yeah.
They think he's their best guy, too.
He's on every single minute.
I'll tell you another thing. I would put him on the NBA show.
Really? Yeah.
I just have him on all the time. Give him a podcast if you like him so much. I would put him on the NBA show. Really? Yeah. I just have him on all the time.
Give him a podcast if you like him
so much. I got him on.
Stephen A., I'm inviting you on.
I remember I had him when
I was still at Grantland. He came on when I was
at South by Southwest, I think.
He was awesome on the podcast.
That made me think, because I had gotten
to know him a little bit from being at the finals.
That made me think, because I had gotten to know him a little bit from being at the finals, and that made me think this was less of a full-time shtick than I think people think.
I think he has different levels he can go to.
Well, he's a good podcast guy.
You could read your ZipRecruiter ads during his dramatic pauses.
Works nicely.
NFC playoff picture really quickly.
New Orleans in the lead.
Rams 2.
Bears looking like locked in at 3
unless the Rams just keep falling apart.
Your team in the inside track on 4.
Seattle looking good for at least a wild card.
Minnesota 7, 6, and 1.
They got at Detroit, home Chicago.
Washington and Philly both 7-7.
Carolina not
out of it, but they have to beat the Saints
tomorrow. Absolutely have to win tomorrow.
Then they have the Saints again last week, right?
And that's it. Everybody else has crossed off, I think.
We can finally cross
the Packers off, right?
And Denver, who else we're crossing
off? AFC? God, thank God they got rid of Mike McCarthy right? Yeah. Look at that. And Denver, who else we're crossing off? The AFC?
God, thank God they got rid of Mike McCarthy.
I know.
It was big.
It was all his fault.
All right.
Week 16.
We have two set.
No Thursday game.
The Thursday game is gone.
All right, good.
I'm proud of you.
You got it.
You nailed it.
Yeah.
We got two on Saturday.
Tennessee is home for the Redskins of Washington.
Josh Johnson looking to get a terrible contract from some dumb GM in March.
Might be getting $40 million from somebody.
I have the Titans by seven and a half over Washington.
Yeah, I went big.
I said nine, and it's 10.
Jesus.
Well, Jaguars are favored by seven, right?
Yeah.
I don't know.
I guess, yeah, it's weird.
I guess the Redskins are still in,
so that's double digits is maybe a little high.
Tennessee is one of a swollen list of teams I would not want to be laying more than a touchdown with.
You don't?
Yeah, because if they fall down 14 of six or something,
do you feel like they're coming back?
Well, I don't know how they can fall down 14 of six
with the most electrifying player in football.
I mean, I'm definitely afraid of Derrick Henry in the playoffs
if he makes it.
Yeah, it's weird that they wait forever to just turn the entire team
over to him, and then when they do, all hell breaks loose.
33 carries today? Yeah. That's how it goes on. It then when they do, all hell breaks loose. 33 carries today.
Yeah.
It feels like it should be 33 carries every game.
Yeah.
Our other game is a good one.
San Diego is home.
Oh,
San Diego,
huh?
Yeah.
San Diego.
You heard me.
They're playing,
uh,
they're playing the Baltimore Ravens in San Diego.
All right.
I have the,
uh, San Diego chargers favored San Diego. All right. I have the San Diego Chargers
favored by six.
All right. I'm beating it.
That's two for me. I said three and a half.
It's four and a half.
That's too low.
It's really hard.
I didn't think Vegas. I thought it was too low
when the Chiefs were laying only three to them.
And now, yeah.
I guess I like Baltimore on the road. It's really hard for Baltimore to them. And now, yeah. I guess I like Baltimore on the road.
It's really hard for Baltimore to score.
It's about 20 points.
And so they have to keep the Chargers in that 17 to 20 range.
And I'm just not sure they're capable of that unless all hell breaks loose.
Should we make a case for the Chargers might be better off doing this on the road?
I mean, obviously you want the bye.
You felt that today with the Rams, right?
There's like 40,000 Eagles fans there.
Yeah.
I mean, I looked online at Chargers Chiefs fans or attendance and hit Google Images,
and that's a sea of red.
Like that was, it couldn't have had a better home game.
I don't know.
I just don't trust them at home as much as I do on the road.
I agree. I don't know. I just don't trust him at home as much as I do on the road. I agree.
I'm with you.
Sunday, the marquee game is the New Orleans Saints hosting Ben Roethlisberger
and his cracked ribs in the Pittsburgh Steelers.
I have the Saints by six.
Yeah, you nailed it exactly.
I said five, but I thought six was a little high.
We'll see.
That's a short week.
I guess it's an emotional win for the Steelers this week too.
Did you like the running back that Steelers had today or James Conner?
I don't know why.
I like everyone better than Le'Veon Bell,
but I like Conner when he was at his best.
Which one do you like?
I like Samuels.
I thought he was shiftier.
Kyle likes Conner more. We were arguing about it when we were Samuels. I thought he was shiftier. Kyle likes Connor more.
We were arguing about it when we were watching the game.
I do.
Connor is a more –
He's a tough bruiser type back in January, I would like to say.
Well, the reason I bring it up is I actually think they should be playing
both of them, and that could be dangerous if they get in there,
if they kind of try to reinvent themselves as more of a running team.
Because their running attack has not been stealth this year.
I think they were in the bottom five for a running game this year.
I don't know how they'd be with that.
I mean, Brown caught the touchdown, but did he have more than 50 yards?
No.
No, we shut him down.
Our defense, we had this undrafted rookie cornerback, Jackson,
who's been playing really well.
Defense is actually, the pass defense has been good.
It's been the run defense that hasn't been as good.
Even Smith-Huster had 40.
That's weird.
Kyle's sorry.
Kyle's upset about the game.
It's all right, Kyle.
We'll be fine.
The watchables, I only have one.
Houston at Philly.
I think this is the week to clean up against Houston.
I think they're favored by two and a half,
and I'm ready to lose money again by going against them.
All right.
Well, I had four, and then I changed it after the game.
I said, that's nuts.
It's too high now.
Philly's back in it.
I changed it to two and a half.
Three and a half. So we're going to split that.
I had four as well and then
I changed it after the Eagles.
You don't care. Nick Falls,
man.
Yeah, that was a scary team
today. That was scary.
You want to keep betting against Houston, you might be on your
own here. Do you think Wentz
has he bought a house, you think? you might be on your own here. Do you think Wentz has, he bought a house?
You think he owns his own house?
No.
Do you think he owns his own house and just like,
I'm going to be here for the next 15 years?
Oh,
that kind of thing.
Man.
Interesting.
It's getting awkward with Wentz.
Yeah.
He could,
uh,
maybe,
maybe it takes the Eagles plus nine and a half on the teaser.
You can buy a bigger house with another team.
What if the Giants offer them
whatever pick they end up with this year?
Next year's first,
and then the year after that's first for Wentz.
Three firsts for Wentz.
Eagles can keep Nick Foles.
Yeah, that's a lot.
That's a lot.
I think the Giants just suck next year again
and wait for another class to come through.
The Eagles trade him in the AFC if they trade him.
Yeah.
I'm trying to think who else.
The Dolphins wouldn't want him.
What about Jacksonville?
Oh, Jacksonville.
That's a good one.
So Jacksonville, Jalen Ramsey, Jacksonville's first,
and then two more first-round picks.
Perfect.
That's done.
Nick Foles, pack your bags.
Do that.
We're going with God and Nick Foles.
It would be funny if you, I know this is what you want to do,
you want to spread a fake trade rumor,
but you should say Kevin Clark reporting.
Jacksonville
offered two ones and Jalen
Ramsey. We should have a fake
ringer reporter who's not actually a real human
being. Yeah, right. Jack
Klonsman reports.
Wow.
I think Fultz
and Carson Wentz are
going to be on the same bus out of Philly together.
Barely watchables. We have a bunch. Next week's not a very fun week of football, I've going to be on the same bus out of Philly together. Barely watchables.
We have a bunch.
Next week's not a very fun week of football, I've got to be honest.
Patriots home for the Bills.
The Patriots are going to be favored by way too high,
and I'm worried about this game because I think it's going to be hard for them
to move the ball on Buffalo's defense.
I think Buffalo has a good defense.
Buffalo's a year away from being something.
Well, they were last year away from being something. In my opinion.
Yeah, they were last year away
from being something.
The year was last year.
That was stupid, though. I'm saying they might
actually be a good team next year.
I have the Pats by 11.5.
Yeah, I guess they haven't had a running back
all year. McCoy's been screwing around.
They have no skill position players. You don't know who any of those guys are.
I have 13 13 and it's
12 and a half.
They play good for... A guy actually
quit on them this year.
They're not that terrible.
But I'll tell you what is terrible.
That AFC East. People got on my case
like, hey, why didn't you say anything to Simmons when he said
you were giving me shit about it. Thank God
the Cowboys play in a horrific
division.
Your team's played in one for like 16, 17 years now.
So?
So what's your point, Sal?
My point is you're now going to beat the Bills and you're going to beat the Jets.
And Houston's going to lose a stupid game and you're going to get the two seed.
That's my point.
I like how people on Twitter were giving you shit as opposed to like all the good people on Twitter.
Just kind things to pass along.
There are a few naysayers.
I wouldn't believe it.
Dear Sal, I just want to tell you I really enjoy your podcast.
Keep doing what you do.
Not a tweet you'll see very often.
Hey, Sal.
Why don't you stand up to fucking Simmons?
His division sucks.
Fuck you.
It seemed like an easy one.
I don't know.
Cowboys home for the Tampa Bay Buccaneers.
I hate this game.
I'd hate it too.
Bucs were hanging around in that Ravens game.
They couldn't really put it together, but they were lingering.
It seems like...
Oh, go ahead.
Take your guess.
I think Cowboys by eight.
I said seven and a half, and it's seven.
It's probably around right.
It just doesn't seem like Jameis could hit that little, I don't know, that post route
to Evans at midfield.
I feel like it's open a lot.
Yeah.
And then just goes away from them, and it just disappears or gets sacked like two out of six plays.
I think he is going to be the star of one of the spring football leagues in
like two years.
They're going to build it around him.
Maybe probably the Charlie ever saw like Vikings,
by the way,
a lot of scary underdogs in this set in this like six to eight point range
this week from a Moneyline standpoint.
We should think about that.
Yeah.
A lot of tease killers.
Vikings are in Detroit.
There should be another one.
I didn't even know about this,
but for some reason I was watching the Lions-Bills game
and they were talking about the Lions did something
with Matt Stafford where they're pushing their fans
to vote for him for the Pro Bowl.
And people got really upset because he's had such a shitty season.
And it turned into like a social media thing.
The Lions' Matt Stafford for the Pro Bowl?
Yeah, the Lions did something about vote for him.
Here's the link.
And then people were like, fuck you, Matt Stafford.
You're not going to believe this, but people on Twitter took Umbridge.
Oh, no.
People on Twitter were upset about it.
Haven't the Lions done enough for him?
they gave him a 9 figure contract and he's the 4th best quarterback in the division
the irony is Matt Stafford will be at the Pro Bowl
after the first 7 guys drop out
and he gets a few more on vacation
I have the Vikings by 3.5 over the Lions
I said the same thing
3.5
5
I'm not betting the Lions but that three and a half. Five.
I'm not betting the Lions, but that might be a good spot for them.
Kirk Cousins is just dying to screw the Viking fans.
Yeah.
Even today, they're up 21-0, and he throws the pick six just to keep everybody on their toes for a little bit.
He's like, yeah, watch this.
Oh, you think you have this?
Colts home for the Giants.
This is another red flag, tease killer game. Colts home for the Giants. This is another red flag tease killer game.
Colts looking great.
Giants look awful.
And yet, Saquon on turf is a little scary.
I have the Colts by eight.
I said seven, and you get it.
It's nine.
Way high.
Oh, bonus.
After the Colts game today, they actually interviewed Andrew Luck.
No,
they did.
Yeah.
We don't even have to do it this week.
No,
we don't even have to do it.
Anyone who saw the games,
Oh,
it was a great team effort.
And you did that whole thing.
It was fantastic.
Oh,
he did do it.
Yeah,
he did it.
He did the whole thing.
I'm very proud of the guys.
I like him.
Let me tell you,
the NFL is dying to make Indy at Tennessee,
uh,
the Sunday night game, week 17.
What is it going to be?
Indy plays Tennessee week 17,
and that seems to be the only game that could matter if both those teams are playing for a wild card.
But a lot of stuff has to happen.
Ravens have to start losing.
My wife thinks that my Andrew Luck impersonation
sounds like my Jackson Maine impersonation.
Let's hear the Jackson.
I didn't hear the Jackson impersonation.
Hold on.
I've got to find the Star is Born quote.
You have to find it?
Why just?
Look, talent comes everywhere.
But having something to say and a way to say it
to have people listen to it it that's a whole other bag
that was my
Jackson Man impersonation
what'd you think
I don't think it does
I don't think I saw the movie
I could actually hear
Andrew's giant luck
impersonate
look at me
all you gotta do
is trust me
that's all you gotta do
that's close
yeah
I'm working on it
Jackson Man's a work in progress
you gotta like do it
deep in
deep in your throat
yeah I don't wanna step on the luck I guess I have to choose I'm working on it. Jackson Maine's a work in progress. You got to do it deep in your throat.
Yeah.
I don't want to step on the luck.
I guess I have to choose.
I don't think I can do both.
Panthers are home for the Falcons.
I have the Panthers by six.
Six?
Yeah. I said four.
It's three and a half.
Oh, don't get carried away with the Falcons
because they beat that terrible Cardinals team today.
Come on.
Well, listen.
One's going to be 5-9.
The other's going to be 6-8.
How many points do they lay?
You don't think the Panthers at least throw a couple haymakers in this Saints game?
I do think they cover.
I think they keep it close.
They'll – yeah.
I just hate what they do.
They'll bring some brass knuckles to the ring.
Listen, but what are we going to – Cam's injured.
He's playing through injury. Yeah. No, but I just think this is like a kitchen sink brass knuckles to the ring. Listen, but what are we going to, you know, Cam's injured. He's playing through injury.
Yeah.
No, but I just think this is like a kitchen sink brass knuckles game.
He takes some swings.
I still think the Saints win, but I don't think the Panthers go down quietly.
Yeah.
Bears, Niners.
Niners, man.
You know, I got to say Mullins was good in that game.
Yeah.
He made a lot of nice, he overthrew, of course, George Kittle,
because George Kittle's on my fantasy team.
It would have been a 70-yard touchdown.
But other than that, he moved around.
He took some big hits.
He hit his check down dudes.
He hit some guys downfield.
I was impressed.
I thought he was pretty good.
24-29, 275.
Kittle was the heaviest player ever to have 200-plus yards receiving last week.
Really?
Heaviest player ever.
Heaviest?
I think, yeah.
Is he like 270 or something?
Something like that, yeah.
Yeah.
He's fast.
He is.
He's probably the fastest I've met, too.
I was impressed by the Niners.
I liked the bald defensive coordinator, too.
A lot of great fist pumps from him. Oh, yeah. Who's that guy? Is he a coaching candidate? I liked the bald defensive coordinator too. A lot of great fist pumps
from him.
Oh, yeah.
Who's that guy?
Is he a coaching candidate?
I think it's my friend Harry.
I have the Bears by 11
in San Francisco.
No, you don't.
Yeah.
It's in San Francisco.
Bears by 11.
I'm staying with it.
Oh, my God.
We may have to
discontinue this podcast.
Yeah.
Bears by five and a half.
I said it's three and a half.
What?
Yeah.
They won the division.
I'm not going to give it their all here.
Hold on.
They can still get a two seed, though.
What was Seattle?
Seattle was three?
Three and a half?
Four? Yeah, but the three and a half, four.
Yeah, but the Bears, their defense is unbelievable.
I guess they should be higher than Seattle.
Maybe a little low, but 11, come on.
Yeah, 11 was dumb.
I love how you're uprating me.
I've beaten you like seven straight years.
How dare you?
Maybe this is my week.
Hold on.
One, two, three, four.
Yeah, I'm going to beat you this week.
What else you got?
Bears. So what was the Bears line. What else you got? Bears.
So what was the Bears line?
Three and a half?
Yeah.
Oh, my God.
I mean, look.
It was pouring rain in that Niners game.
Every dumb thing that could have happened against the Seahawks happened.
And it still went to overtime.
And the Seahawks had the ball.
They get a holding penalty. Oh, the guy fumbled the kickoff.
Right.
Start at the 14.
They get a play down the sideline.
It somehow gets called back.
That was ridiculous.
I don't think that happens.
I'm not going to lose three weeks in a row with this team.
I'm sorry.
I had them against Denver, or Denver against them, Seattle.
Enough's enough.
I think the Bears win this game by double digits.
And I'm going to remind you that you laughed at my minus 11.
Trubisky's a poor man's Nick Mullen.
And I don't even know if it's first name to Nick.
I was just kidding.
Four teams in the poopfecta.
We're going to go with, first of all, the Cleveland Browns at home for Cincinnati.
I have the Browns by eight and a half.
I went high on this one.
Can you believe that?
Yeah.
You went slightly high.
I had six.
I went low, but I'm closer because it's seven.
But the Browns are six, seven, and one,
and a seven-point favorite in a division game.
That's astounding.
The Browns were a Hugh Jackson firing away from making the playoffs.
Yeah.
If it had happened
like three weeks earlier,
I really think they would have made it.
Which game could they have won?
So the Raiders,
that's the one,
the glaring one.
They lost in overtime to the Raiders
and obviously tied the Steelers.
Well, the Steeler tie was egregious.
There was another one too
they should have won.
They should be 8-6 right now.
Yeah.
Their record does not reflect
the talent of that team
and the games that they've played.
Miami is home for the...
They lost to New Orleans 21-18.
They should have won that game,
though, remember?
Yeah.
Lost to Tampa Bay in overtime 26-23.
Another stupid one.
Yeah.
Yeah.
They had a...
There was one game
where their kicker murdered them,
but I don't remember
which one that was.
Miami is home for the Jaguars.
I have Miami by four.
You get this one.
Four and a half.
I said six.
That's a stay away of all stay aways.
Two Florida teams.
Enough, enough.
Packers at the Jets.
Sam Darnold.
Aaron Rodgers.
Two ships passing in the night.
Going in different directions.
One's going north, one's going south.
I don't need to tell you which one's going south.
Packers, I have minus four against the Jets.
I said four also.
Vegas is not done taking Packer-Backer money.
Two and a half.
Baiting you.
Baiting you to take Green Bay here.
Begging.
I like the Jets.
Last one, Rams at Arizona.
The Arizona is awful.
I think Arizona is the worst team in the league right now
just because of the injuries.
I have the Rams by 11.5 in Arizona.
You get this one.
I always said 9.5.
I don't know.
There's something about it.
That Rams team I didn't like today.
But it's 13.5.
They have to win that, right?
Yeah, they're going to win this.
The Patriots have to win.
That's to win.
Yeah.
Let's take one more break, then we'll do the last thing.
Let's take a break to talk about FanDuel.
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And since we're here, I wanted to remind you,
on the Ringer podcast,
two relatively new podcasts,
Ryan Rosillo's Dual Threat,
which is kind of coming into the home stretch here.
We'll see if it's going to keep going through the draft.
We've got to negotiate with Ryan
and his team of accountants and lawyers.
And then Winging It,
Vince Carter,
Kent Bazemore,
Andy Finberg.
They had an awesome podcast with Steph Curry and Andre
Goudal last week that made some news. So check
that one out as well on The Ringer
Podcast Network.
All right. Sunday night.
Casey
is in Seattle.
This is a good one. Yeah.
I'm excited for this
one. I think Seattle is
going to be underdogs
and I can't remember
how many times Seattle has been an underdog
in a night game at home when they've actually had a decent
to good team
it has not been many times that that's happened
I think the Chiefs will be favored by 3 points
I said 2.5
right now it is 2.5
yeah this is a tough one
you're going to want to bet the Chiefs in the bounce-back game,
but Seattle kind of needs to bounce back too.
You're right.
I don't remember them being an underdog too much,
but they did win that night game two weeks ago.
What were they, favored by three against the Vikings?
Was that a week ago?
Yeah, something like that.
I think Damian Williams is really good.
I actually think he's better than Spencer Ware.
If there's one good thing from that Spencer Ware injury
is that they found out that Williams is actually better than him.
Yeah.
I wonder how the hell they lost that game still.
With Williams running well, Mahomes completing ridiculous passes,
they still blew it.
Did you see – there's a couple bad fake punts today.
Yeah. The Bears had one.
The Bears had a really
or maybe they went for it.
Oh, I did see that. Yeah, no, the Bears had a fake punt.
It was just a snap to the up back.
That was terrible. The Rams ran a really
risky one that it looked like the guy actually
caught it, but then it hit the ground.
I also thought it was all over his back.
I know it hit the ground. This has been a recurring theme on the pod, but then it hit the ground. I also thought it was all over his back, but I know it hit the ground.
This has been a recurring theme
on the pod, but
there's a recklessness this year.
Coach
is trying to be quote-unquote aggressive,
but now it's just reckless.
We see it on these
fourth and ones where you're not
entirely sure why they're going for it on fourth and one
with the team they have and the personnel on the field and then
these weird fake punts. It's like Peterson has made the whole league crazy.
Peterson being like, yeah, fuck it, we're going for it
has infected the whole league and now everybody thinks they're hot shit.
These fake punts and I don't know. Who went Saturday night?
Oh, no, But then Saturday night,
the Denver kick a field goal when they should have gone for it.
No,
I can't remember.
No,
but that was stupid though,
because I,
I wouldn't have minded that if I felt like their defense was going to stop
Cleveland,
but I didn't really feel that way.
I had Cleveland.
I was so happy that Denver kicked the field.
But don't,
when you,
you don't want your,
you know,
you want Baker backed up at the end zone.
Inside is five.
You got the fans screaming at you.
That's a nice spot to be in,
even if you don't make it on fourth down.
Yeah.
I thought they should have gone for it,
but they settled for the field goal.
Right.
On the other hand, I mean, they were down to like, you know,
no receivers left and Philip Lindsay wasn't doing anything.
So I don't know.
Last one, Monday night, Broncos at Oakland.
Can they flex this one to the preseason next year?
We'll have to watch it.
I'm going to flex my bowels.
That's an awful one.
I have the Broncos by six.
Oh, wow. You went high. I said three andcos by six. Oh, wow.
You went high.
I said three and a
half.
It's only two.
Really?
Good week for me.
Or maybe a bad one
for you.
Whichever you want
to look at it.
What's good about
Oakland?
They're a little
feisty today.
I don't know what
you could say about
it.
I didn't watch that
game too much, but
they seemed in it.
It's Driscoll.
Okay. All right. So you kicked my ass this week they seemed in it. It's Driscoll. Okay.
All right, so you kicked my ass this week.
There we go.
I'm set to win the next 13 weeks, and we tie.
What do you got for parent corner?
Oh, parent corner.
All right, let me set this up.
So we went to Corolla's to watch football,
and we got Brad there and Harry, and my friend Ken says,
hey, I have to stop over.
I'm coming back from Hawaii, and, I have to stop over. I'm coming back from Hawaii.
Then I have to go to Palm Springs.
Where are you watching football?
I'm like, well, we're at Corolla's Warehouse.
So he goes and brings like four dozen donuts from Hawaii.
I don't even remember the name of the place.
But they're good.
It has like guava cream.
He's like, oh, you got to taste this guava cream.
He's pushing these donuts
on everybody.
And then our friend Brad
comes in
and he's in a bad mood.
Why is he in a bad mood?
Well, he met,
he,
I think he owes
some money in taxes.
And,
and he,
my friend Ken,
who knows everything
about everything,
is like,
well, let me help you out.
What do you have?
What's going on?
You know?
And he tells him, you him, I owe X amount.
Can I pay this off? What do you think?
They're like, well, you have a job.
They're probably not going to let you take 10 cents on the dollar
since you have a job and you've had a job for years.
And he's like, why don't you just pay your effing taxes?
Brad picks up a handful, passes on the donuts,
because the donuts were good,
but takes a handful of watermelon
and throws it at Ken,
hits him in the chest.
He's like,
thanks for your fucking advice.
And then he goes to walk away
and now it's a scene.
Now it's bad
and now I have to separate both of them.
Oh, Ken was like ready to fight him?
Oh yeah,
and Brad's calling him names
and Ken's calling Brad names.
And your kids are there? My kids are there and this is where it's up. Ken was like ready to fight him. Oh yeah. And Brad's calling him names and Ken's calling Brad names. And,
um,
and your kids are there.
My kids are there.
And this is,
this is where it stops.
And so we temporarily bring Brad in one.
I don't want anyone to go home.
Part of me is loving this,
but I have to get past this very uncomfortable spot where they want to kill
each other,
you know?
Yeah.
Um,
and,
uh,
and so,
but I don't want anyone to go home,
but Ken's like,
it's either me or him.
One of us is leaving. I'm like, Oh, this is just going to be I don't want anyone to go home, but Ken's like, it's either me or him. One of us is leaving.
I'm like, ah, this is just going to be bad if one of them has to leave.
But it kind of has to be Brad because he, he committed an assault kind of still angry.
It's a watermelon assault.
Yeah.
Well, he'll throw a watermelon on Sunday.
And my wife, I told her to get fruit and I said, don't get watermelon.
It's gamey, but she got watermelon anyway.
I don't want to blame her, but anyway.
Okay.
So anyway, uh, Brad's in the other room and I don't want to blame her, but anyway. Okay. So anyway,
uh,
Brad's in the other room and counts.
I can't listen.
How about if you just stay on the other side of the room?
He's like,
no,
we threw watermelon at me.
I'm not taking that.
I'm not sitting here with him.
And my son,
my 13 year old was like,
Ken,
you know what?
You offend.
I think you went too far with the,
just pay your effing taxes.
Um,
you know,
I don't think you should have to
apologize but uh i think you hurt him more than he hurt you and he like took a step back and he's
like all right fine as long as he just doesn't talk to me that's fine so my 13 year old was
smarter than all but broke into peace between ken and brad and um ken says he's still never
talking about again but uh that was nice for the rest of the
day, at least.
What an amazing story.
Yeah, it's nice.
That reminded me of a little bit of when you and Jeff Ross were feuding for months and
then Tom Cruise heard both sides of the story and then said, you've offended your friend.
You have to apologize to him.
Yeah, it was that.
Yeah.
Look at the 13-year-old Tom Cruise.
Wow. Yeah. What an the 13-year-old Tom Cruise. Wow.
Yeah.
What an incredible story.
There you go.
I feel like I raised him the right way just based on that.
What a week for Ken.
He had a 10-hour phone call with another man,
and he had watermelon thrown out by a lunatic.
Oh, the Cody's are really hitting up in the fourth quarter.
Everybody wants it.
Oh, my God.
Then there's
our Fred Daniel who was genuinely
upset at me that I didn't invite him to the
Ringer staff holiday party that was on a
Thursday and only had people that word for the Ringer.
Right. He's furious.
He's going to hear this, yeah.
I'm even more upset. For my parent
corner, I have to go get my son, so hold on one second.
Oh, good.
For my parent corner,
instead of having me tell you what my son's Christmas list does,
he's actually here.
He's going to tell us his Christmas list.
This is what he's asked for.
Do you still believe in Santa or no?
Oh,
no.
Okay.
All right.
You believe that the elf of the shelf until a year ago.
Yeah. When mom told me she me he was fake in the restaurant.
No, I told you.
No.
Oh, wait, yeah, you did.
Yeah, I did.
You want that distinction.
Yeah.
All right, give us your Christmas list, Ben.
Number one, NXT wrestling figures.
NXT wrestling figures. NXT wrestling figures.
Any ones in particular?
I want them to make an Aleister Black figure.
Okay.
What's number two?
A gold chain.
A gold chain.
Is it thick?
Is it thin?
What kind of a gold chain and why?
I want a thin one to look like craig kimbrough
for baseball okay wow sounds good where do we get a gold chain kyle are you gonna help out yeah we
can we'll find one we'll find a good one all right because kyle's been on mr t do you watch rocky
three i mean is that what he's do you want a clock like flavor flavor yeah okay all right we'll get
we'll start with a chain.
We'll see if you like it.
All right.
What else is on the list, Ben?
Baseballs.
I need more baseballs because I keep on throwing them over.
Throwing them over where?
In the bushes or like over to the neighbor's yard.
So Ben, he plays baseball in the backyard and you're not going to believe this, but
sometimes takes full baseball swings and hits the ball.
And they went into the other,
the neighbor's yard and our neighbor who,
who speaks English,
but I wouldn't say it's strong called my wife over and gave her like 12 of
Ben's baseballs that were all in their yard that had bounced in their pool and
hit various parts of their guest house and things like that.
So the neighbor's not a big fan of Ben.
What else, Ben?
I want a new glove for baseball, too.
Why do you need a new glove?
Because I writ all over mine.
You did what?
You writ?
You roto all over?
Yeah.
I don't have good grammar.
Don't judge me.
Okay.
I thought he said, I want a new drug.
I thought it was a Huey Lewis drug. That's next me. Okay. I thought he said I want a new drug. I thought it was a Huey Lewis drug.
That's next year.
Okay.
What else, Ben?
I want gift cards.
Gift cards.
Okay.
Yeah.
Okay.
You got some PlayStation gift cards, and you got the code, and you got the WWE 2K19 game
for video, and that was good.
You got to be careful with the Visa gift cards because then you can just
go off the internet. You have specific gift cards.
Yeah, it's gotta be like PlayStation.
Something specific. Or iTunes. You like the
iTunes gift card. Okay, what else?
This is good for your grandparents to listen
to this. I like it.
Last thing. Red Dead Redemption 2.
Woo!
That's actually...
We've run
ads from them
and that was like a generic ad
right there wasn't even an ad
yeah it's the better GTA
because I haven't allowed you to play GTA yet
yeah
any new years resolutions Ben
other than to not be as much of a dick
that's what I was going to say.
That's good enough, I think.
That's good.
All right.
Ben, hold on.
Wait, didn't you, wasn't he playing Call of Duty?
No, not Call of Duty.
Fortnite.
Fortnite, yeah.
And then what happened with that?
I think people want to know.
He was suspended, well, grounded from playing.
Well, yeah, he threw the controller
and it bounced off the floor and hit his TV and shattered
the screen on the TV.
And guess who hasn't had a TV for the last month and a half?
Oh, it really hasn't been that long.
Yeah.
He has no TV in his room anymore.
Not that he should have in the first place.
Wow.
All right.
I'm proud of you for having it.
You know what you should add to the list?
Add the neighbor's house.
Then it's easier.
Then you don't have to get more balls.
You could just, it'll be your house. Yeah. And you could get, right? I mean, if your daddy really loves you, add the neighbor's house. Then it's easier. Then you don't have to get more balls. It'll be your house.
Yeah.
Daddy really loves you.
Buy the house next door.
So that's it, Ben?
Any New Year's resolutions other than not be
as much of a dick?
No.
Is there going to be a girlfriend
for you next year? Hell no.
Hell no?
I'm waiting until 16 at least.
16?
We'll talk after, Ben.
What are your thoughts on nephew Kyle dating the girl again?
Oh, no.
He's back.
The on-again, off-again girlfriend is now on.
It's fine.
It's fine.
Oh, man.
It's fine.
Ben is your homie, man.
It's fine.
He always has your back.
I know.
I know.
That's your dude right there.
We'll go out and find girlfriends together. We'll walk Melrose or something. Yeah. Maybe she'll buy you homie, man. He always has your back. I know. That's your dude right there. We'll go out and find girlfriends together.
We'll walk Melrose or something.
Maybe she'll buy you a baseball, Ben.
Ben, thanks for
coming on the podcast. You're welcome.
Good luck on some of those gifts. I love it.
See you, Ben.
So yeah, I had him
on because
one of his
Christmas wish list things was a gold chain.
And I felt like you needed to know that.
That's the best.
He's 11.
Do you know anybody who's put a gold chain on their wishlist?
No, I really don't.
I'm trying to think.
Kyle, what's in my future with that kid?
More gold chains, for sure.
More than multiple gold chains.
There's going to be a leather jacket soon, too, isn't there?
Yeah.
He's going to be a Chris Moltisanti, I think.
I think you've got a soprano on your hand.
It's like 25% Italian.
What do you have to plug, Sal?
I'll lock it in Monday through Friday, 4.30 to 5.30 Eastern time.
Damn it, Rams.
I would have won.
I would have had a 60% profit on the week,
but they couldn't pull it together.
Jimmy Kimmel Live, 11.35 each weeknight on ABC.
And against all odds, Wednesday night,
we're going to handicap the big games.
We'll get best bets from the general trifecta.
Harry's won nine out of 10 bets, so listen for that.
Has he really?
Yeah.
He won't let me forget it either.
Bucs under.
It's always a stupid game that I don't want to take.
The Buccaneers under.
There's going to be no points in that either. Bucks under. It's always a stupid game that I don't want to take. The Buccaneers under, there's going to be no points
in that game.
He was right.
Can we have a,
can we do a 24-hour telethon
where it's just
Ken and Harry talking?
No, that would be great.
Trying to raise money
for Brad's taxes?
Yeah.
It's only two,
it's only two and a half
phone calls.
Yeah, if everyone
sends a dollar,
we can tell more
Brad stories.
We wouldn't have
enough money, bud.
Can't Brad start like a Patreon account so people can chip in?
He's brought so much joy.
My God.
Maybe there's a watermelon tossing league he can join and excel at that.
I can't believe he threw watermelon chunks at Ken.
Yeah.
For some reason, that's like especially disgusting.
Like a donut would have been better. It would have been a line you wouldn's like especially disgusting. Like a donut would have been better.
It just seems like a line
you wouldn't cross, right?
Yeah.
Donut would have been better.
Watermelons are wet.
Yeah, you're moist afterwards.
Some people are allergic to watermelon.
It stained his shirt.
Yeah.
Ken claimed he had a date tonight.
I don't know.
There was a lockout.
A date, like a Tinder date? I don't know. A date, a date, like a Tinder date?
I don't know.
I don't know how to get into it.
He had to get on a plane for it.
He had to get on a plane for a date?
I have crazy friends.
I think I have too many crazy friends.
I may have to make cuts.
That should be like a nightclub.
Yeah.
You have,
you know,
you're like a 50 person nightclub is your friend base.
And once you get to 50, you got to kick somebody out. If you had a new friend, like your friend, you know, you're like a 50 person nightclub is your friend base. And once you get to 50, you got to kick somebody out.
If you had a new friend, like your friend, who's, who's your best friend at Fox that
you've made since you started working for them?
I like Stoner.
Rob Stone.
You like Marcellus Wiley.
You like a bunch of those guys.
So you add a couple of those people, kick a couple of the older people out of the nightclub.
I like it.
You make a reality show out of it.
Yeah, that's smart.
You should vote.
Yeah.
Vote some of them off.
Yeah.
And then someone gets a nice shiny gold chain at the end.
By the way, I'm not coming to the fantasy draft next year.
I'm really done.
I'm really done.
I don't want to do this anymore.
You're going.
It's going to be fun.
I don't feel good about myself.
I did not enjoy it.
I have low self-esteem now.
I didn't like it.
How would this be the greatest fantasy whenever Drew Brees gets hurt in the first play?
Like if they just benched him?
Yeah,
it did something.
Yeah.
I guess they'd have to bench him.
Drew Brees is hurt.
The Nats are talking in hushed tones.
I'm jumping on the coffee table.
Yeah.
Those are the,
those are,
forget the dumb Wentz trade rumors.
Those are the rumors you'd be starting about.
Drew Brees is Twitter, you know, something, something weird. Poor Wentz trade rumors. Those are the rumors you'd be starting about. True Breeze's Twitter, you know, something weird.
Poor Wentz.
Should Wentz start boxing stuff up now?
No, man.
I don't know what they're going to do with him.
I'm going to pay him.
I'm sure the next fan base will like him.
All right, Sal.
Good job by you.
Good job by you, Billy.
All right, thanks to ZipCruiter.. All right. Thanks to ZipRecruiter.
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Don't forget about the rewatchables.
That is going to be earlier in this week.
We're doing con air and I will see you here on the side I don't have feelings within
On the wayside, never on the side
I don't have feelings within