The Bill Simmons Podcast - The Undefeated Fantasy Quest, So Long 'Ballers,' Minshanity, and Million-Dollar Picks With Matthew Berry, Mallory Rubin, and Joe House | The Bill Simmons Podcast

Episode Date: October 4, 2019

HBO and The Ringer’s Bill Simmons is joined by ESPN’s Matthew Berry to talk fantasy football (2:09). Then he sits down with Mallory Rubin for Mallory’s Most Intriguing, in which she shares her five most intriguing story lines of the week, including the return of Melvin Gordon and Golden Tate to their respective teams (39:43). Finally, Bill calls up Joe House to give out some Million-Dollar Picks (1:17:55). Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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The Road Taken, brand new podcast from us about life on the road from a couple of guys from Vampire Weekend. Very excited about this one. This is a really cool podcast. We also have The Hottest Take, which is available exclusively on Spotify. Just wrapping up week three for there. I did a nice little thing about the Jets on there on Wednesday.

Ryan Russo's podcast is wrapping up, what, week four? Yeah. Return of Scott Van Pelt. Yeah. It's happening. Friday morning. Holy shit.

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going to talk about whether a fantasy team can go undefeated. Mallory's most intriguing baseball playoffs and all the latest football stuff. And then million dollar picks. We were scared last week. We didn't like last week. We scaled it back. It was the right move. I love week five. We're going to talk about that with Joe House. That's all coming up first, our friends from ProJamp. All right, on the line right now, Matthew Barry. This is great because not only do I get a guest for the top of the Thursday BS podcast,

but I also get to brag about my fantasy team. I feel like we've done this podcast before, and we probably have, but I want to do it again. My fantasy team. I feel like we've done this podcast before, and we probably have, but I want to do it again. My fantasy team is 4-0. It's ridiculously loaded. I have 509 points through four games. Impressive.

Now, what do you... I have a question for you, Bill. Yeah. I have some questions for you. So first off, it's obvious the only reason I'm making a repeat appearance in the BS Report, I'm usually a one-a-year guest. I'm usually one episode a year, right? No? But that's my mistake. You should be like three

or four episodes a year. That's my fault. But anyway, keep going. I appreciate that. I'm always available to you as you know, but I feel like I'm in Kyle back me up. If I'm, if I'm correct on this, I feel like the entire reason I'm on today's show is literally. So you have an excuse to talk about your foreign or fantasy team. No, that's one of the reasons, but I also want to talk fantasy, but okay. We did this nine, 10 years ago and I don't remember where we landed. So I just want to do it again. Yep.

So I have a question. Can a fantasy team go undefeated? Does this happen? Yes, it happens. It's not, it's not often. It's obviously hard to do.

It's easier to do in leagues in which people really, whether it's people who don't really know what they're doing, but it has absolutely happened. It's happened many times. My favorite undefeated story of all time is, and I wrote about this in my book, but there was a league where after the first week, a guy in the league died. He passed away. It was a longtime league. it's obviously everyone's shocked it's awful it's a horrible story and so they but they to honor the guy they're like well let's play out the league and they're like and what we'll do is no one's going to make any more pickups we're all just gonna you know we'll just sort of play it with whoever we drafted and for the for the our

our league member who passed away we're going to set his lineup just on whatever the projected points are we're just gonna you know lineup just on whatever the projected points are. We're just going to, you know, we'll do it honest and we'll just try to whatever, whatever the projection points on the website say is his best possible lineup. And we'll just do that. And that team went undefeated for the season and won the league. Oh my God. That sounds like a sports movie, right? But I mean, it's a, they sent me all the screenshots and, um, I mean, you know, just an amazing story. And then, you know, it was a very sweet story. and I mean, you know, just an amazing story and then, you know, it was a very sweet story and then like, you know, at the funeral, like,

you know, they gave all the winnings in the league to the, you know, to the parents who didn't even know he was in this league. You know, it was, you know, some college kids and anyway, the story is awful about the guy dying, but anyway, so yes, that's a long way of saying it does happen, but

my question for you, Bill, is do you believe, do you credit your undefeated start, your 4-0 start, to kind of like, do you think your team had a nobody believed in us kind of mantra here? No, I actually did homework for the first time in about 10 years, including reading all of the columns you wrote leading up to the thing. But I did, uh, I actually really, really studied for the year. Cause I was like, I'm just tired of losing. I don't like myself fantasy. I did a whole hottest take that we did at this other podcast we have about how fantasy actually just makes me feel bad about myself. I don't know why I do it. I heard that, by the way. I know, but what I realized is I was cheating myself.

I had to look in the mirror, Matthew Bear. I had to say, what am I doing wrong? Maybe I need to stop blaming all these players that I pick, the concept of fantasy football. Maybe it's me. Maybe some of this is my fault. And I just made myself a better person. I like it.

I like the responsibility. I like the self-evaluation looking in the mirror. I wish my Redskins would do that. I also did something that you have advocated for years and years in this draft, which is if you like somebody, get the person. Don't get scared off because the price gets high. I was in a situation with Nick Chubb, who everybody in my draft knew that I loved. I had talked about him on the podcast with you. And Nick Chubb comes up and I just decided to make a joke about it. Like, oh, here he is. Here's my guy. And it goes into the low 30s and two other people are just like, no, we're bidding them up. And it's like 36, 37, 38. And I'm, I'm just like,

I'm getting them. I don't know what you guys are doing, but I'm getting them. It goes to 48. Oh my God. Yeah. And I'm like, I'm getting them. I don't care. Fine. It was $12 more than I wanted to pay. He's on my team. Fuck all of you. And then Nick Chubb running like a deer in the wilderness last week, just dancing around. It was wonderful. I love Nick Chubb. Yeah. I love Nick Chubb. So it was things like that. It was just like, stick to your guns, go into the draft with things that you liked. I wanted the Tampa receivers. I thought they're going to throw the ball. So I have Godwin and Evans. I really wanted Nick Chubb. I love Marlon Mack from last year. I knew I wanted Lamar Jackson. I want to take multiple quarterbacks. I have him in Baker. Um, and it's just on down

the line. I really wanted the bears defense. Um, I really wanted Evan Ingram. And so I went into the whole thing with the strategy of, I want these guys, I'm getting them, which I think is the right way to do this. Right? Yeah. Look, look, and because, so you do'm getting them, which I think is the right way to do this, right? Yeah, look, look, because so you do an auction format, which is not, which is, and you and I have talked about this many times, it's so much better than doing a snake draft,

but most people do it. That's the more popular way to do it. But you know why I do an auction draft? Because my testicles dropped. That's why. I mean, some people, they haven't dropped. I mean, I wouldn't make fun of them, but mine have dropped. So I do an auction job. Yeah. I'm not topping that. So I will just merely say,

I'll move off of that and say, yeah, look, uh, in an auction value, it's all about, it's all about, you know, market value and, and ultimately, you know, a player's value is what somebody is willing to pay for him. And, and honestly, like, and you and I both been in auctions with John Walsh. That is entirely what John Walsh, John Walsh won't take a cheat sheet or any kind of auction value sheet into an auction. I've been in many, I've been in baseball and football with him and he will just like, he wants who he wants and he doesn't care.

He doesn't care about price or value. And sometimes it works out and sometimes it doesn't but the truth is is that as soon as the first game plays all those all those values are out the window and to your point i've always said that like people like uh i really want this guy but is it around too early is it is it five bucks too much or whatever just like it doesn't like it's your team you're the one that has to live with it you've studied it your team and your rule and your league settings, certainly much more than I have or anyone else that puts out rankings or values. And so, yeah, get the guys you want. And right.

Obviously, like so Evan Ingram going in was probably the fourth or fifth tight end in terms of price and whatever auction sheet you used. He's the number one tight end fantasy right now. Nick Chubb was probably running back 12. He's a top five guy right now. He kind of got heat though. He got heat as we got closer to the drafts. He became sexy. And I was bummed out because I liked him.

The concern on Nick Chubb, there was two concerns on Nick Chubb, or three actually. All of which, at least two of which have been unfounded so far. Number one is the concerns about the offensive line. And while that's hurt the passing game of the Browns, it hasn't hurt the run game. The number two was his passing game usage. People were like, ah, is he just really just a two down back?

And he's actually been used more in the passing game. Not significantly, but he's been used more than I think people thought. And the third is the concern is what happens when Kareem Hunt comes back. But when you're running the way Nick Chubb is running, like, I don't know that they all of a sudden say like, ah, let's dial it back. Well, this is the case. I hope you have Kareem Hunt on your team.

I would want, if I had Nick, Nick Chubb, I would want Hunt on my team as a handcuff. But I mean, you know, the way Chubb's running, I don't know how he comes off the field.

We talked about this on this podcast. And I was like, I am not scared about Kareem Hunt because I think after eight weeks, they're just going to be like, Nick Chubb's our dude. The other guy I really wanted, and I got to be honest, I'm not sure I would have done this unless I actually did homework, but I just became convinced Lamar Jackson was going to be awesome. And this became, you're either on one side of the fence or the

other. But the thing that convinced me, which is something I remember going forward, is they really did try to build this offense for him specifically. That even including the players that they drafted last year and all these different things, they were just like all in on Lamar Jackson. This wasn't like, oh, we have this guy, but we're trying to fit him into this other offense that we have. This is like, this is our offense for Lamar Jackson. And I have a little concerned about him long-term this season just because I think defenses are starting to realize they should just blitz the shit out of him and, you know, basically bank on their receivers being inexperienced and stuff.

But for the most part, by accident, he gets to 20 points a week. He could have a terrible week and still get 20, you know? I mean, the rushing obviously keeps his floor high. And we talked about, listen, I don't think anyone expected this, you know,

top three fantasy quarterback, but like, if you look at some of my, there you go. You should have my job. No, I didn't expect it. I mean,

this is like way beyond anything anyone could have imagined. But we talked about this through the preseason. I do, I do a column in the middle of the preseason called like 10 lists of 10 where I do a bunch of lists. And one of the things, one of the lists is like stuff I'm buying, you know,

preseason preseason narratives that I'm buying. And one of my narratives was like, like I'm buying the fact that this is not going to be a run heavy offense in Baltimore, that they're going to open it up. I'm buying that. You know how John Harbaugh said, we think our offense is going to revolutionize football.

And I'm like, easy, John, I don't think it's going to do that, but it does tell me that they're going to open it up. I'm buying that, you know, how John Harbaugh said, we think our offense is going to revolutionize football. And I'm like, easy, John, I don't think it's going to do that, but it does tell me that they're going to open it up and it's not going to be just the, the crazy run heavy offense that it was last year under Jackson. And we'd heard that they really wanted, that they wanted speed, right. To your point about if you just sort of looked at the moves they made right in drafting Marquise Brown in drafting drafting miles boykin in drafting justice hill right that that they wanted just a lot of speed and they were going to open it up in a in a big way and so um you know i had jackson like on the on the love list as well and so like he was he was a trendy sleeper for a lot of people in the fantasy community it wasn't just me but um yeah but i i'd

be lying if i said like i thought he would do. I didn't think he would do top three. Yeah. He was, he was still a late rounder or like in my auction, he went for six bucks. Um, and yours is a keeper league, right?

This is the one. No, I wish I'd know. I would, that was, that's our baseball one. I wish this was, we talked.

Damn a check is a big keeper fantasy thing. I don't really know how do you do it? Because like this year, if I had Lamar at six, next year he's, you know, he's potentially triple, quadruple that.

But I would have him at six. That's a huge advantage. Exactly. But that's the great thing about a keeper league, right? So that, like, so you took a chance on Lamar Jackson

when his value was an all-time low. You're getting him for six bucks. Like, you've earned that, right? So, so to me, what a keeper, keeper leagues are so much fun. Dynasty leagues, keeper leagues are so much fun because number one is same thing, right? Yeah. So you go into the draft next year and you've got a top five quarterback for six bucks for

well below market value, which is great, but there'll be other bargains throughout the, right. And you're probably throwing back Nick Chubb at 48. But there'll be other bargains throughout the right and you're probably throwing back nick chubb at 48 um but there'll be other bargains throughout the league and the other thing is is what it does is it makes the league a year-round event because now second half of the season some teams have fallen out of it but if it's a keeper league and somebody says to you this is not a great example but they're like hey um i'll give you my homes for jackson Right, right. They're open to trad stuff. Yeah. Right. So then you're doing rebuilding stuff

and then there's off-season trades as well. And so, I don't know. Well, this is what our baseball league that me and Hench own the team that we've had the League of Dorks. Yeah. You know, and we have a minor league draft in that. And, you know, like we drafted Mookie Betts

and we had Mookie Betts for like four and a half years. And then his contract finally ended and it was like emotional. It was like, bye Mookie.ts for like four and a half years. And then his contract finally ended. It was like emotional. I was like, bye Mookie. This is so much fun. He was really like our guy in every way. Right, of course. Because you like, you draft him when he's a minor leaguer

and you're, we think there's something in this guy. Yeah, scouting him. And then he comes up and he blows up and then you're like, this is our guy. Yeah, so I think that with football, I don't know how you do it with these dynasty leagues, but it would seem like you would have to add what? $5,

$10 a year, maybe $5. I've seen it all different ways. So I'm in a diner. I'm in two different dynasty leagues, but I'm in one that's like, it's crazy deep. It's 12 teams,

33 man rosters. Um, and you keep all 33 every year. Like it's, it's just, and so you do a four round rookie draft every year and that's it. Like that's your team. Your team is your team. Like you do a startup draft. rookie draft every year, and that's it. Like, that's your team. Your team is your team.

Like, you do a startup draft. I'm in another league, my longest league, which is a semi-dynasty league with a bunch of kids I went to college with. So this is going on 20-odd years that we've been in this league. And it's a 12-team league, 18-man rosters, half-point PPR, and we keep 13. But there's no penalty. You just keep whatever 13 you want. So I've had Todd Gurley, you know, since he was a rookie. I'll have him, you know, for his career.

I've had Phillip Rivers his entire career in that league. And so, like, you just keep it as long as you want. You can only keep 13. But I've seen other ones where you, like, you can, like, with Lamar Jackson at six. Like, the old rotisserie league baseball, like if you played by the book, like the people that wrote by the book, you would have Lamar Jackson for six bucks at two years. You could keep him next year for six bucks.

And then he goes into his third year, his final contract year. And so you do two things. You could either say, you know what? I'm not going to extend him. He's six bucks for this year. Again, I get him super cheap. But at the end of the third year, you have to throw them back. Yeah. Or you can extend them for five bucks a year. So if you said like, I want his salary to

be 11 bucks. Now you get him for year three and year four at 11 bucks. That's what we do in our baseball. So it'd be like Mookie's five bucks. Cause he's a minor leaguer third year. We can have them for two more years at 15 or one more year at 10. And it's great. And like, you know, we picked Andrew Benintende. He, he, we had, we could have him for two more years at 15 or one more year at 10. We were like, great, two more years at 15. And now we're kind of stuck with him next year because it sucked. Right. So I got to send him some PEDs this winter. It'll be fine. We're going to work it out. But, But to me, that's like, you know, I mean, the whole point is we're all sort of playing general manager.

And it makes it's more strategy. It's more longer term. Like you have to really think about it. Like, you know, so yeah, right. You signed a guy to a bad contract and you're stuck with it. Like just like real general managers have to do. Well, the trades is the best part. Like this year, Mike Mendelsohn,

my friend, won League of Dorks. The reason he won, the biggest reason other than he had Verlander and Cole, which is outrageous. Last year,

he had a shitty team and was doing the rebuilding thing and traded his best guy for Alex Bregman, who then going into this year was I think like 10 bucks or 15 bucks

and became like the staple of his team. And that trade ended up winning him the 2019 title basically. So I like those things. I would like to explore with football. That's exactly how a keeper league should work, right? So he knew it wasn't a season. So he traded some, you know, he traded some assets to rebuild.

And like, we see that in sports all the time. We, you know, that's the Astros, right? I mean, right. Well, one other, so one other thing I did when I stepped it up, as I told you, I had to look in the mirror. Yeah. There's some good stats now. And there's stats that are exceptionally useful for fantasy.

Use them on your show. We use it on our fantasy football podcast where I can now know how many snaps somebody plays every game. The air yards thing is great, where it's like this guy was open every game. His fucking quarterback couldn't get him the ball, but he's open. Just believe in the process.

The next-gen stats, I think, are really interesting and can tell people... How much separation they're getting. Yeah, all that stuff. Or if a quarterback is kind of, it's basically like BIP and FIP in baseball, where you can kind of tell if somebody's overachieving and it's not realistic versus whether maybe this is for real. And I don't know. I just like all the information.

The next gen stats, you must love this. It's great for you. Yeah, no, it's awesome. And we use it a lot here. I mean, it's really come a long way. It's still not as statistically significant as baseball or basketball. There's much more data. There's, you know, much better analytics in basketball and baseball. But football is finally starting to catch up, you know. And so, right. I love reading Barnwell. I love reading Aaron chats. Like, you know, we, we've got a bunch of guys,

a bunch of guys out there that do really good work. You've got a couple of great guys over there at the ringer, by the way, I forgot to mention that, that crazy 12 team, 33 man dynasty league that I'm in where we, um, Danny Kelly's in that league as well. Yeah. He's great with this stuff. Well, wait, hold on one second. Wanted to plug a couple podcasts. The Hottest Take on Spotify.

We are finishing up week three. I had one about the Jets. How to Save the Jets. You can listen to that only on Spotify. Just follow The Hottest Take. We have a new podcast called The Road Taken with a couple of the Vampire Weekend guys. The first one is up now.

You can subscribe to that on Apple, Spotify, wherever you want. And then Sonic Boom, our new podcast about how the Sonics got stolen. Stolen from Seattle is available now on Luminary. You can get two months of access to Luminary's premium content for free if you sign up at luminary.link slash Simmons. After that, only $7.99 per month. Cancel anytime. Terms do apply. All right, back to Matthew. So here are the obstacles for going undefeated.

Yeah. The bi-weeks brutal. Writing about it on a podcast, a national podcast, that's one of them. You think you've jinxed yourself? No, I already did that because on Monday, after I demolished somebody else

and went to 4-0, I sent an email to the group that read like this. First of all, it said the subject heading was going forward, which I was really proud of. I know that I put together probably the best fantasy football team ever, but that shouldn't deter you guys from making moves every week and trying to stay competitive. Just try to carry yourself with pride and dignity these next 12 weeks. I know this is tough, but it's going to be tougher to look back someday and know you didn't do your best. I was really proud of that. So I jinxed myself there. I might as well try to own it with the podcast.

But I have week six. I have all these buys. And that's why it's so hard to go undefeated because you're going to have the week where four of your guys are in a buy week and now you just have to get lucky, basically. Yeah, it's a little bit of that. It's playing the waiver wire

and you got to stay healthy too. That's the other thing. I mean, like... The red flags. Right. The red flags. Hate the red flags. No one thought, listen,

and it looks like he's going to come back sooner than we thought, but like you had the number one pick, you know, and you drafted Saquon Barkley. No one's going like, well, that was an injury risk.

What are you thinking about Saquon? Right. And then I'll, you know, he's out for four weeks. It's funny. I actually was afraid of him because I thought he was just going to be running an eight man against eight man fronts all year.

And that did concern me but like I would say if you're going to say which top five guy has the best chance to get injured you wouldn't have picked him no you'd pick McCaffrey yeah I mean because he's five foot four yeah because I mean and his usage is insane

yeah so he would have made he would have made me nervous I mean honestly like I actually if you'd ask me which top five guy would be it would have been levy on bell i didn't have levy on bell as a top five guy but he was going as a top five guy on espn and i had a number of people that i i know in the industry did have him as a top five guy i mean levy and bells played all 16 games once in his nfo career and that was 2014 so bell would have been my pick for top five guy most likely to get injured but it wouldn't have been barkley who's like you know i don't know how that guy's built from the same dna i am because i like he's like he's just a massive human being his legs are like it's never been anything like it no i mean

i've interviewed him and i'm just like how are you and i are the same species like he's just like i'm sure he's tired of hearing it too but it it can't not be brought up. Right. Where he's just like, he's just got this body that resembles no other body. You know, I think to go undefeated, you have to get lucky a couple of times. And it kind of already happened to me in week one a little bit where I had like a 10, 11 point lead, but it was James Conner against the Pats. Right. And this is it. Like if he gets to, I'm looking it up. If he'd gotten to like 13 points, Iats. Right. Right. And this is it. Like if he gets to, I'm looking it up.

If he had gotten to like 13 points, I lose. Right. All he needs to do is fall in the end zone or something. Right. So not only is he going against my favorite team, but now I'm rooting against the James Conner touchdown. And when you have that three hours on the Sunday night,

where it's like, there, here's this one guy. I, nephew Kyle was with me. I was having a heart attack. And plus, he's kind of hard to tell apart from Jalen Samuels because they have similar body types.

So half the time, he wasn't even in the game. One's 30, one's 38. So you just see the three and you're like, yeah. Can't see the number. So half the time, I'm freaking out. He's not even in the game. And I got to say, I really enjoyed it. It was great.

I was on pins and needles in a variety of ways the whole time. Whether it's's Sunday night game or the Monday night game, but when you're clinging to a narrow lead and you're done and the other guy that you're playing or the other person you're playing has one guy left, that is a sweat like no other where you're just

sitting there like the other Monday night in the War Room League here. I was down I think war room league here, I was down, I think, I think it was, I think I was playing more, but like I was down eight points and I had James Connor who had stunk the entire year. I'm like, I think I should be okay. But like, who knows?

Yeah. And like, and I had a friend in another league. He's like, I just need like 10 points out of Tyler Boyd. I'm like, yeah, you should be fine. And didn't get it. Yeah. Like he didn't, he, he didn't get it. So the wide receivers just cannot be trusted ever in any situation.

Hey, before we go, cause you're a busy man. Um, give me three people that I should believe in that people have kind of cooled off on three people season. Yeah. Three people that you feel that could be had if I,

if I could get sneaky and try to steal somebody from another team in my league or whatever? Three people. Well, I'll give you one that made my love list. I'll give you... I'm trying to think of the third.

Oh, here you go. I got three. Okay. First off, Kyler Murray. Kyler Murray's been fine. The problem is that Lamar Jackson has been what we thought Kyler Murray was going to be. But, look,

Kyler Murray started to run the last two weeks. He's, I believe, I don't have the stats in front of me, but I'm pretty sure he still leads the NFL in dropbacks, in terms of total dropbacks. I mean, they're throwing a ton. It's a crappy defense. And so I just, I believe, I think the kid's a crappy defense. So I just, I believe,

I think the kid's special, just in general, just from NFL terms. I think ultimately the kid's going to be special. Kyle, you agree with this? What, Kyler Murray is to bet on? Being special? Yeah. Yeah. I was just trying to wake up Kyle. It looked like he was getting sleepy. Fair enough. Understood. Oh, come on. He looks sleepy for a second.

This podcast of dorks has made him snoozy. No, he loves this stuff. Right. So anyways, Kyler Murray is somebody that I actually think has a big rest of the season. Some guys that are coming up. I think Ronald Jones is really interesting. I think it's only a matter of time before he takes that Tampa Bay job over. I thought he looked great last week. He had some really good moments in that.

And he had some yards pulled back, too. Yeah. And so here's the thing about Ronald Jones. We talked about this on the Fantasy Focus podcast that Field and I do every day, which is that Peyton Barber is just a guy. People forget Ronald Jones was a second-round pick, had a high pedigree coming out of college. No one looked at the Buccaneers like, wow, Ronald Jones, you're taking that guy?

He was highly thought of coming out of college. And again, Peyton Barber, no disrespect, is sort of just a guy. So it seems like it's taken a little bit longer than it should have for it to kick in for Ronald Jones, but there's, there's elite talent there that finally seems to be emerging. So I sort of believe in him. Well, you also have, they have two of the best 10 receivers in the league now. Yes. And defenses, you could feel it last week in that Rams game. Like they just couldn't stop. They're trying to shut down Evans and they just couldn't stop both of them at the same time.

And then that opened everything else up. Yeah. And you think about Arians and you know, sort of his offenses. And so Jones, who strikes me as probably a better pass catcher than Peyton Barber, like just seems to fit that offense a little bit better. And he's also really good at those sneaky inside runs,

which, you know, then set up the play action. And I think he's a better fit. I'm with you. Um, Sony, Michelle,

your Patriots. No, stop it. Yes. So now you're just making me mad. No, I look, I know he's been brutal so far this year,

but there's a bunch of brutal, brutal. That's an insult to things that are less brutal. Actually brutal. Jesus. He's been more than brutal. He's been awful. He's been like Shawshank Andy in the hole for two months brutal.

Yeah, he's been bad. But this is why I am still encouraged by Sony Michelle. And I think, again, you could get him for a song, right? I guess. So he made my love list this week. Oh my God. and i think he gets back on track against my redskins um like i would i would make you're still saying my redskins you should have disowned them by now i know i should i should have it's so awful it's so awful and by the way bill i hope you're patriots i hope you guys kill us i hope you guys i hope you put a 60 burger I hope you guys kill us. I hope you guys,

I hope you put a 60 burger up on us. Like, honestly, because until Bruce Allen is gone. Yeah. I mean, Jake Rose is a good coach. Oh, this is Bruce Allen's fault? Not the owner who's owned the terrible team the entire time?

Look, I know, but I'm just trying to think of, like, what's fixable, right? I mean, so it's Daniel Snyder's fault that he has enabled and kept Bruce Allen as long as he has. But ultimately, like, Daniel Snyder's fault that he has enabled and kept Bruce Allen as long as he has. But ultimately, Daniel Snyder's a guy who writes the checks and trusts Bruce Allen

and trusts his football staff to make smart decisions. Bruce Allen, he's been there since 2010. His winning percentage is just over 40%. It's the fifth worst in the NFL since he took over. And it's like, they're 0-4, they're going to be 0-5. And what's more important than this is that, like, someone, I was having this debate with somebody, like, are the Redskins the worst franchise in the NFL? Because here's the thing about Miami. At least Miami has a direction. Yeah. You know what I mean?

Miami's like, we're selling our assets, we're stockpiling picks, we're getting younger players, we're getting people that are going to buy into the system. Like, it's going to take them a couple years, but Miami has a plan of attack. Like, what are the Redskins? I mean, the Redskins are going to are, you know, with a deal with Landon Collins, and they still owe Alex Smith a ton of money.

Like, they're so capped out, and they're going to be 0-5, and, you know, there's just no hope in sight. You just don't understand. And, like, they've led the NFL in players on the injured reserve each of the last two years. And they're well on their way this year. They can't get their own left tackle into the building. Like, it's just, anyway. It's pretty grim.

We beat the Redskins 59-0 in 2007, I think. I'm pretty sure that happened. Yeah. Oh, it did. And it'll be worse this time because what's even worse is in addition to, you know, it could potentially be 59 to nothing, um, uh, or 65 to nothing. In addition to that, it's going to be a half empty stadium and the people that are there are all going to be wearing Patriots colors. That's what's the worst. Those people are going to be totally quiet and respectful. Right.

I'm sure. Exactly. Of course. I hope, listen, I hope they are complete and total mass holes, right? I hope they live up to that. And because honestly, like that's the only way, I think that's the only way that Snyder makes a change is that, that if the Redskins have to hit complete and total rock bottom. And so if they lose 60 to nothing to the Patriots in front of an entire Patriots crowd at FedEx field,

a half empty FedEx field, you know, I mean, I remember the Redskins used to have like a 25 year waiting list for season tickets. And now it's like, Hey, you want this three game package?

Yeah. You know, with by the way, on the field. Yeah. Anyway. So, so the Patriots,

Oh, I was going to say the Patriots, 85 points as a fantasy defense through four weeks. They've been, I mean, they've been ridiculous. I mean, that's like,

what's the record for a fantasy D it's going to get tougher for them. Second half of the season, but, um, there's, there's a schedule still pretty good. It's pretty good. The next,

next three weeks. Uh, like, has a fantasy defense gotten a 200 points? Seems like a lot. Yes. I'm sure 250?

I wonder what the record is. I have to find that out. I'll find that out and I'll tweet that at you. This would be good for Fantasy Football Now on Sundays ESPN 2. Fantasy Football Now

ESPN 2. Appreciate that. 10 a.m. Eastern. I watch it every Sunday. I don't like when Field Yates uses your nicknames though. That guy can fuck off. Your nicknames are your nicknames, though. That guy can fuck off.

Your nicknames are your nicknames. He doesn't get to use those. He's doing it entirely to troll me. Yeah, that's bullshit. It's total, thank you. It's complete bullshit.

I'm going to tell him that. Because here's the thing about Field Yates, by the way. Field Yates, a huge Ringer fan, a huge Bill Simmons fan. He listens to your podcast

every, he listens, he's listening now. Every day he'll come in. I'm trying to help him. He loves it. He came in the other day. He was cracking up on me. He's what? And he goes, he's like, Simmons does this thing. He's like, you just have to hear this. And he played me the parent corner about how Ben is DMing Instagram celebrities. Oh, yeah, that is true. Right. Yeah, that happened. And so, yeah, so Field loves the show.

Well, tell Field to get his own nicknames. I will do that. Thanks for the support, Field. I'm going to just, I'm going to tell him, like Bill told me, Bill told me he's never coming on the Bill Simmons podcast. He's banned from the show. Well, at least for six months until we know

that he's gotten this out of his system and he comes up with those nicknames. So you're in on Sonya Michelle having a huge week and a 59-0 Pats win. I am. Listen, I think Sonny Michel gets into the end zone here. Here's my argument for why I think things will get better for Sonny Michel. He's had at least 15 carries in three out of the four games this year. As you just mentioned, it's an amazing defense.

15 shitty carries, but go ahead. Yes, but the volume is there, Bill. The volume is there, Bill. Okay. The volume is there. Did you know Sony Michelle actually leads the NFL in terms of rushes inside the 10 yard line? He has 11 of them through four weeks. This is, so again,

you just, you talk about sort of underlying stats and not that these are like super deep underlying stats, but just in terms of like, what is fantasy talent? We talked about this in the preseason fantasy success comes from talent and opportunity. Look,

Sony Michelle didn't all of a sudden become a bad running back. This is a guy that was a star in college. He was a star last year. Like he's had a couple of bad games, but he didn't all of a sudden turn into like a guy that isn't any good. Now what's happened is, is you guys lost James Devlin. You've had some injuries on the offensive line. You guys are shuffling. And this happens every year. Like the Patriots offensive line struggles, struggles, and then they figure it out and then they're dominant. And so the fact that they haven't gone away from Sonny Michel, that he's still getting the kind of volume that he's getting, he's still getting the kind of volume that you would love when they get in close.

Remember the Patriots are one of the most run heaviest teams inside the five yard line over the last five years. Like when they get in close, they run. And so, so I believe Sonnyny Michelle who everyone's just like super down on look you think about what I read you a stat yeah go ahead what do you got through four games he has one

target as a receiver last year he had 11 targets as a receiver and caught seven balls yeah he's not part of the passing game the problem with Sonny Michelle and I've been saying this since last year is that when he's not part of the passing game. The problem with Sonny Michel, and I've been saying this since last year, is that when he's in the game,

all they do is run. And if I know that, guess who else knows that? The other 31 NFL teams. They don't throw him the ball. And that's why every time he runs, it's against seven and eight guys because everybody knows

they're running the ball with him. It's frustrating. I don't understand why they're doing it that way. Well, I'm not going to question Josh McDaniels or Bill Belichick on football strategy. I just questioned him right now. This is the most

mass-holish thing ever. It's like the most entitled Boston sports fan ever. How about this? Run for more than two yards and I'll root for you. He's a guy that I think you can get dirt cheap that I like a lot. And people are panicking on DeAndre Hopkins, who's wide receiver 39 on the season. Obviously, he's going to be just fine.

Not me. I'm not panicking. I also think Will Fuller has a big game this week. There's another buy low. Big week, and in two weeks, he'll be on the IR. We should mention, this is the last thing, and then we have to go. Yeah. Other than, I'll plug your stuff.

Now you have your fantasy show on the ESPN plus every day. Get super weird. Yes. This is your art project. This is like, this is your Sundance kind of fantasy show. This is what, this is my,

this is my, we don't have footage. Um, we don't have footage. Uh, we don't have, we don't have a lot of budget. So you know what?

Screw it. We're just going to make ourselves laugh. Like the entire show is like norby said to me uh when he was coming to show he's like my only rule is do whatever you want it just can't look like anything else on espn and i said done right i'm like you know what you can get away with and you and i are both stern fans like i always think back to like you know jackie puppet or gary puppet back in the day or i think about avenue q and i just like you can get away with a lot more stuff with puppets I've found. So you do that. And then Sunday is like your comic book. This is your Marvel franchise. It's just, you guys are shooting fantasy information out. Like it's a t-shirt gun. You're just pumping it out left and right. Info, info, info, which is

why I like it. All right. Here's my last question. Yep. Here's my fantasy team. You tell me if you think this team can go undefeated. All right. Lamar with Baker as backup. Yep. Nick Chubb, Marlon Mack with Devin Singletary, Tariq Cohen, and Jordan Wilkins behind them.

Jordan Wilkins as my little handcuff. Yeah, no, you need that because, you know, Mack got banged up last week. He mispracticed yesterday. So, yep. Mike Evans, Chris Godwin, Alshon Jeffrey,

with Jarvis Landry, Curtis Samuel, and Preston might not be long for my team, Williams. Yeah, I'd want to improve Preston Williams.

I'm not the biggest... I took a fire on him. Yeah, fair enough. I'm not the biggest Jarvis... Jarvis Landry is somebody that I would try to deal off of a big game. Yeah, I'm one guy short.

Bears defense with the Cowboys defense is a backup because you know I like having the two defenses. I know, yep. And my guy Joey Sly, the best kicker in football. Best kicker in fantasy. Oh my god. 55 yarders every week. Can that team go undefeated? From what you've just

heard, undefeated. Who's your tight end? Oh, and you have Evan Ingram as tight end. That's a really good team. It's a 12-team league? Yeah, 10-team. Okay. Still, that's a really good team. It's a 12-team league? Yeah. 10-team. Okay. Still, that's a really good team.

Yes. If you stay healthy, it's got a shot. It absolutely has a shot. Wow, you hear that, Kyle? I got a shot. You got... Unbelievable.

You should find different ways. As long as you stay undefeated. I love the email you sent. You should find just different ways to troll them. You know what I mean ways to troll them. The stakes are if I win, which I have won in 12 years, I get to vote somebody out. So you get that

power over nine months too. That's this league. That's this league with Sal and Hench, Damoshek, Jon Hamm, all those guys. Oh my God. Yeah, that's amazing. I mean, what you should threaten them with is you say, say, listen, if this team go, if this team runs the table, I'm calling my old pal Connor and we're

doing a 30 for 30 on this thing. Right. We're going to interview all you guys. Yeah. Yeah. That'd be good. We'll interview, we'll interview you. We'll interview Field Yates. We'll just do the whole thing. All right. Thanks for, thanks for popping on. Don't let Field Yates steal your nicknames. Good luck on all your shows. And I promise. How about week eight? Let's make a date for week eight. Week eight.

After week eight. Heading into week nine. Heading into week nine. It's a date. But you and I just, as long as I'm on the podcast, I just want to mention this one last thing. Yeah. You and I may need to start a petition campaign to save 90210. I don't know.

I hear it's on the bubble. Oh, it's on the bubble? I'm worried it's on the bubble. I'm worried it might not come back. Oh, I thought the ratings were good. I don't know. I hear it's on the bubble. Oh, it's on the bubble? I'm worried it's on the bubble. I thought the ratings were good. I'm worried it might not come back. Oh, I thought the ratings were good. It'll be back. The ratings were good and then they dropped off a little bit.

But did you like the whole run? I loved the whole run. I thought it actually got better. I liked it. Yeah. I enjoyed it. I really did. I thought they did a good job.

I liked how meta it was. I thought it was good. Yeah, I thought it was really clever and smart how they did it. And I will be legitimately disappointed if it doesn't come back. All right. Well, if the day comes, we'll have to do it. Matthew Berry, pleasure as always. Talk to you soon. Thanks, Bill. All right. We're bringing in Mallory. Do Mallory's most intriguing for week five first. Let's talk about Square. They make that little white reader that helps tons of

businesses take payments. Here's the thing a lot of people don't know. So much more. So much more. So much more than just the card reader. They have tools like pulling a sale for restaurants, retail, and salons. Easy to build websites. Invoices you can send from anywhere.

Full service payroll. Kyle, as you know, he directs, he produces my podcast. I direct it sometimes too, yeah. If he does something I like, I tell him, can I square you right now? Pulls out a square. Square me, man. I give him a little $10 tip. Hey, hey, hey.

Be like, hey man, get a beer for you and a friend on me. Because I really like to handle that. Square designs and builds all their hardware in-house. So it all works together smoothly with their software. Running, growing a business takes a lot of work, as you know. While Square can do all that work, it can help with a lot more than you think. See how Square can take your business from square one to whatever's next at square.com slash go slash BS. That is square.com slash go slash BS. Mallory Rubin is here.

Hello. Mallory'sin is here. Hello. Mallory's most intriguing. We do it every week. This is your time. It's your very special time. The wildcard games just happened. Baseball playoffs coming. Yeah.

Talking to House a little bit later about the Ewing theory potential of the Nats. And he's like, they don't qualify. Bryce Harper sucked. Just spoiler alert. That's what he said. Okay. And everybody's just like Astros, Dodgers. This is happening. Why wouldn't this happen?

Does the way that House assesses whether Harper is a traitor hinge at all on House himself being a traitor who abandoned his lifelong allegiance to the Baltimore Orioles to switch Well, you're an Orioles fan. You should understand that anyway. Come on. You got to ride or die for life. What is this? That's, see, my thing is like either be a widow with your team,

be a sports widow, or ride or die. Ride or die. House's thing was this team played in Baltimore. The only reason I rooted for them was because I had no other option. And then a team literally moved into my city and called themselves Washington, which is my city and the city I care about. And the Baltimore owner is terrible. And that's why I did it. That's fine.

I wish him nothing but misery. Love you house. I do not have a baseball in for you today, Bill. Really? Yeah. I want to keep you on your toes. I'm so surprised.

I figure we'll do it for sure. The next couple of weeks heading into the championship series rounds and the World Series. Do we want five weeks in a row of baseball talk? I would love that. Is that what you want? I'm not so sure. I did not watch any of the wild card games. So I'm off to a bad start with the baseball playoffs.

Man, the NL wild card game was an absolute thrill. I know. The Nats crowd was, I can't really recall seeing too many baseball crowds that behaved in that way. It was awesome to watch. It had like a World Cup feel to it. It really did. I think Nationals-Dodgers has the chance to be really, really good. And the Astros in general, I just cannot wait to watch that team in October.

It's just every single aspect. The pitching matchups for Astros-Rays are incredible. It's going to be really fun. How many domestic violence people are on the Yankees roster? What do we settle on? Man, well, we have a suspension.

Well, he's out, so it's just Chapman. Is he the only one who has a history? I mean, if you run out of reasons to root for the Yanks. Depressing. I, as you know, my favorite team in the baseball playoffs is always the team going against the Yankees. So you're a Twins fan? I'm a Twins fan.

You and Megan Schuster, did you read Zach Cram's piece on the Twins? I read all the Twins stuff. Twins' quiet but astounding playoff curse. How is Byron Buxton going to get hurt during this series is really the ultimate question. I'm going to say and I wish him health and success.

Probably running into a wall is he really this. Full extension on a dive in the outfield trying to make a spectacular play. Probably making

a spectacular play but regrettably crumbling to the ground. Injuring himself in the process. I have one email for you before you do your top five okay it's from isaac collins okay hello isaac could not agree more on your mike trout take

who cares if he's the best player of all time statistically but has never made an impact play when it counts what exactly is the narrative here every year he was consistently incredible while everyone else around him was terrible. Wow. Compelling stuff. Enjoying baseball for an individual's performance on a terrible team is the most masturbatory thing I can think of in sports. Enjoying something in total isolation from the rest of sport. Sincerely, Isaac Collins. Isaac Collins. I just want to make sure I remember that name so that I can always effectively identify your burner accounts in the future.

That really was an email. I'm just glad people know. People understand you can't be the MVP out of 72 win team. Okay. Unless you're in like Dungeons and Dragons fantasy worlds where dumb things like that happen. So again, I... I always thought it was a team sport.

Call me Chris. Alex Bregman, deserving MVP. Great. He's my MVP you think he's at bats in a lineup surrounded by other MVP caliber players actually matter more than what Mike Trout can do for a team that desperately needs him you think it is disqualifying that Mike Trout had outs I would like to be clear like I could have gotten out of this he's like no sign me up for 10 more years of meaningless at-bats for bad teams.

He'll still be a Philly. This is great. I'll win nine MVPs. He'll be a Philly at some point. No pressure. He will be a Philly at some point. He will. I would like to be clear again, though, that this is not an argument against Bregman or someone on a winning team.

That's not the point. It's an argument that Trout should not be disqualified for playing on the Angels. I just think we need a third award. Oh, my God. for playing on the Angels. I just think we need a third award. Let's give it to the Nerd Award for best individual performance on a team that just kind of happens in a vacuum. Can we call it that?

Go ahead. What's your top five? What's number five? I got a weird one for you for number five. You ready? I like weird. We're heading into the

final two episodes of a little show called Ballers. Oh, I thought you were going to say Succession. I was so excited. I've watched every Ballers. I have no idea what's going on. And not just this season, the fifth season of Ballers, but all time. This is it for Ballers. This is it?

This is it, Bill. We're heading into the final two weeks of Ballers ever. The Rock's filmed his last scene where he's driving in a car that was clearly filmed outside his house. Not's driving in a car that was clearly filmed like outside his house. Not only driving in a car, but sitting alone in a room doing a voiceover interview

so that he's not in scenes with any other people at any moment in time and could get out of there in like 18 hours flat. He's like, I can only film this from 8.30 to 9.30 on Thursday.

That's it. It's incredible. There was in the most recent episode, he was in both a boardroom scene and a funeral scene, and I was astounded that they were able to get him in scenes with that many other people. They probably had to build a fake funeral thing in his office

and wherever he was. He might have been green-screened in. Can't say for sure. You think they're green-screening him? Leave one seat empty in the funeral pew. Right. Maybe two. Patch it in after. Stick them in. I love, I've never seen a show that has more scenes of somebody on their car phone. So many car chats.

Ballers season five is just like rocking his car phone. It's incredible. So this is what I want to know. Yeah. Heading into the final two episodes. Can I describe the show in one sentence? The answer is I'm sure no. How prescient will the final two episodes of Ballers be? Because I think that watching this season has been a really fascinating consumer experience in ripped from the headlines to weirdly feeling like it is predicting the current state of football.

Now, am I saying ballers is a good television show? Bill, I am not. But if we quickly go through the list of some of the things that have happened and some of the people who have been central figures, think of the 18 game schedule plot. Right. Vote around that and healthcare for veteran players. This is going to be a thing heading in to the actual real world CBA. We saw last week, you know, the test balloon about, well, what if it was 17 games?

This is happening now. Odell OBJ coming in for a you see a real NFL player on ballers. You think it's going to be like a cameo. Recurring role. Right. For back on this season.

Shockingly available. And what's it around? Lifestyle brand. Well, what's been happening with him on the field? Not only does he have his very, very, very dope custom Nike shoe 720 line. Not sure if you've seen the Desert Orr colorway. I'd highly recommend checking it out. If not, great shoe.

Kyle knows what I'm talking about. Kyle's pointing at me, the watches, right? All the stuff about his watches out on the field and how many hundreds of thousands of dollars did the watch that, you know, I didn't, I never noticed the watch sub pot. Oh no, wait, they mentioned it 400 times. It was clearly how they're paying them is through this watch sub pot. It's all happening. Yeah. Was Melvin Gordon on the field the first few weeks of the season? He was not, but guess where he was, Bill? He was on Ballers

hosting Ricky at his pool party. On and on the list goes. Spencer becoming owner and GM of the Chiefs and what's the Chiefs-centric storyline?

Did you think that was realistic or no? I mean, obviously, like patently absurd. Like two years ago, the guy was having fertility problems

and that was an entire storyline for them and now he's the owner of the Chiefs. There was a moment. He's like, hey, and that was an entire storyline for them. And now he's the owner of the Chiefs. There was a moment. He's like, hey, I'm going to own an NFL team now. There was a moment in the most recent episode where he took a swig from his pain pill bottle. Yeah. And I was like, oh, my God.

They just abandoned what was a major plot point. Abandoned the whole season revolved around fertility and painkillers. What about last season? I was just thinking about this. And they did feature it heavily in the, you know, the previously on package that led into the season five premiere. Yeah. The whole NCAA plot. Like Spencer trying to tear down the NCAA and the thing about the elite recruit and funneling money and trying to change the power structure and the landscape of compensation.

It's just gone. It's just gone. It's unclear how the show, first of all, happened. And then, like, do they have writers meetings sketching out the storylines? And look at this. Our set's falling apart and I'm complaining about ballers. Well, this feels like a harbinger because I was just good. Patrick Mahomes's jersey just fell off our wall.

Yeah. And the other big plot point is the Mahomes contract negotiating the Mahomes contract. Can he be the $200 million man? I always find moments like that on ball are so delightful. Similarly, like the Charles and the Rams on the show trying to lure Kamara from the Saints. It's like, what if you're TJ Yeldon? And, you know, Melvin Gordon's having pool parties on the show. Mahomes is talked about as the guy who's going to shatter what the contract structure and

guaranteed structure looks like. And then you're the one they bring up just to say, like, I don't want to settle for a mediocre guy. How does that feel? Tough one. Getting insulted on ballers is like a triple insult. It seems like the only goal of this show is every show has to end with some sort of party where they can do the wide pan of all the people just seeming super happy in Miami.

Yeah. And I don't think there's another goal. Actually, that's it. There's just one goal. Are we going to end on the party shot or are we going to end on Spencer contemplating the future looking into the water? Well, that was how every Entourage show ended for eight years. It was the guys looking out on either a skyline or the ocean. Yeah, especially now that we know about the fear of water.

I think we're going to get the ocean. There's one other thing that's a prerequisite. Jay Glazer has to be just crammed into every episode. And if he can be pacing outside of his own unbreakable MMA studio, even better. Jay Glazer probably has the third most minutes of any episode of the show is them just going to be firing odell's watches from a t-shirt can and gun at jay glazer's unbreakable studio and then it's going to pan back to people partying and they're they're firing them from ricky's radio show studio yeah so that's another thing that he's got his vape pen player empowerment slash players trying to become media people. And it's all kind of almost something. I know.

And yet people like it. Well, it's a really fascinating thing where all of the topics feel like just right. And then they'll do something like have Spencer's character say that the only reason he didn't lose his scholarship when he was at Miami was because a professor advocated for him. And you're just like, I'm out. Yeah, that never happened. That did not happen. Yeah. That did not happen. Two. That did not happen.

Two more episodes of Ballers. Soak it up, folks. Kyle, was this on your radar? No, but when the show came out, it was. I'm glad people are still talking about it. Soak it up like the tequila shots. The Rock's on the show. He makes like $40 million a movie. I know. And yet, it's clearly he feels bad. He didn't want to do the show anymore and they're like, please, one more season.

Just let us wrap it up. And he's like, only if I film half the scenes from my car. I will only film scenes with Candace and Boss Man. That's it. All right. Next one. Number four. Number four.

So one of the characters who has played a meaningful role on Ballers, as we just noted, Melvin Gordon. Yeah. Is Melvin Gordon also going to play a meaningful role on the Chargers starting this week? He's back. Can he help them? So, holdout ended last week.

He was back with the team. He was technically active in week four. Didn't play. Anthony Linn had said it was going to be, you know, in case of emergency only. Well, now heading into week five, heading into a matchup against the woeful 0-4 Broncos. Yeah.

What sort of usage are we going to see from Melvin Gordon? What is the fantasy implication of that for Austin Eckler owners and for people who drafted Gordon and then have been waiting to see if he'll come back? And Austin Eckler was good. Austin Eckler's been excellent. 490 total yards, I think, six touchdowns. He's been scoring a lot. There's like advanced stats stuff with him

where it's like he's actually the most productive running back in the league right now for what his chances were and how he handled them. So one of the things that makes this situation intriguing is obviously just the broader Chargers macro narrative with them, you know, always in funky game situations. Can they get it together in time? But specifically with what you just mentioned

with Eckler and his usage I mean Gordon is one of the best running backs in the league he's not going to seed his standing as RB1 but it also doesn't make sense to remove Eckler from that offense given how productive he's been I'm wondering if the volume of injuries on that team specifically and they're both sides of the ball you know we've already talked about derwin james and yeah on the podcast but receivers a lot of receiver injuries right now so are they going to be changing the personnel packages that they tend to feature to build around two rb sets more often and shift to at least temporarily until Mike Williams is healthy Travis Benjamin's back out there an offense where both of those guys can be featured in meaningful fashion again both from a

fantasy perspective and in a way that makes that offense hum Anthony Lin has said you know he's going to ease Gordon back into it so I don't think he'll be like at 100 capacity this week but they're also going against the Broncos who just made Leonard Fournette last week look like he was back in his LSU trucking Ole Miss defenders in highlight reel gif-able fashion.

They caught him a bumper car in D&C football. They did. I love that. And also lost Bradley Chubb. I mean, they're second best defender after Von Miller and one of the best defenders in the league. So is that defense going to be able to stop the run? I thought you were going, first of all, I love when teams play two good running backs together. Nobody ever does it.

There's got to be real reasons for it. But I always feel like it's dangerous. Kyle and I want the Bears to do this with Cohen and Montgomery just out there in the same time, same backfield. I thought you were going, would they flip Melvin Gordon right now to a contender that is not happy with the running back? Well, it doesn't seem like there's a market for that based on the fact that they allowed him to, and who knows how much of it is just posturing when there's a holdout in a contract dispute,

but they allowed him to pursue a trade. And judging by the fact that he's currently on the Chargers and ended his holdout of his own volition, didn't find a trade partner. Now, that doesn't mean that the team couldn't now try to do that on its own terms, but... I was thinking of a certain team that you might root for.

I'm good. You're good? I like Melvin Gordon a lot, but I don't think the... You're good with Mediocre Mark? No, I don't think... I mean, the Ravens have one of the best... Did he fumble this week?

He did. The fumble was brutal. It's like three fumbles this season? The fumble was brutal, but I will say until the fumble, he looked great. The Ingram-Gus Edwards, eventually when he's a little more comfortable and a little more ready to read an NFL scheme, Justice Hill. And then obviously, I'm not sure if you've heard of him, but Lamar Jackson. That's pretty good.

I like that person. Those four players running the ball, I feel pretty good with that. So you want to see two running backs, but more importantly, you think there's a Mike Shanahan possibility here where both guys get ruined from a fantasy standpoint. I personally...

Nobody's totally happy with either guy. It definitely feels possible. I'm hoping that that's not the case. I am personally invested in this because I drafted Melvin Gordon at the moment in the draft where I felt like I couldn't... I could justify the risk

and I couldn't justify letting him sit there any longer. Yeah. And for the first few weeks of the season, I deeply regretted it and I would not call the fantasy team that I have in that particular league

successful or productive. So I need him to be good. I really need him to be good. You know my strategy with holdouts in fantasy drafts? What? You don't want any part of it. You know why? Not worth it. Let it be someone else's problem.

I want my guys to report to my team. I typically stay away from it too. part of it. You know why? Not worth it. Let it be someone else's problem. I want my guys to report to my team. I typically stay away from it too. I remember the only time I ever did it. Remember when Joey Galloway held out a million years ago? And I was like, I'm going to get him. He's going to be great. He's going to come back. And he just was like rotting fish in my fridge

for months. And then you have to hold on. You can't cut the cord. And it really hurts because not only did you spend like an asset, whether it's a pick or you spent money, but then they're just

chewing away your team. I just didn't feel like I took him in the sixth round. I didn't feel like I could pass on the potential at that point. And specifically, not only with the yardage, but just the touchdowns.

Yeah. And the touchdowns that Gordon gets you are so valuable. I also think that, you know, the way Eckler's yardage right now is pretty evenly split between his rushing and his receiving. So are his touchdowns right down the middle.

He can still play a meaningful role in that offense even if he's not getting the bulk of the rushing carries. I think it's going to be fascinating to watch that play out. Let's take a break and then we'll do number three. All right, now it's time for the State Farm Safe Bet of the Week. Yeah! The player you can count on. Okay! Then we'll do number three. All right. Now it's time for the State Farm Safe Bet of the Week. Yeah. The player you can count on. Okay.

Just like football, life can be unpredictable. That's why State Farm agents are there to help. Over 19,000 agents. That's a lot of agents. Sure is. A local State Farm agent can be just around the block, whether you talk in person by phone or through the app. State Farm is there.

Go with the one with coverage and agents you can count on. Like I count on this person right here, Mallory Rubin. Incredible. Officially editor-in-chief of the site this month. It's true. The EIC. As of this week. Who can we count on?

I say Pat Mahomes is a wonderful fantasy asset. Yeah. I think he is the runaway choice for the MVP unless the Ravens defense can get a little better or unless Gardner Minshew cools off. Who knows? Man, yeah. I don't want to count out the Mississippi mustache yet from the MVP race.

Mahomes, not a very good week last week. They still scored 34. It's amazing how in a game where he didn't throw his, not only his typical amount of touchdowns, but throw a touchdown, the streak ended, you know, you had a moment where you allowed yourself to believe that maybe the Lions could do it, but you never really doubt Mahomes and the Chiefs.

And this week, Sunday Night Football against your Indianapolis Colts. Your team, your favorite team. They're coming up a million dollar picks later. Prime time, feels like Mahomes is going to bounce back with... 31st defense. Quite a showing. It's a tough one.

Travis Kelsey double teamed last week. Maybe trying to unlock him a little bit. The gymnastics from Kelsey with the incredible hook and ladder, midair instant maneuvers. Sports movie-esque. Fun stuff. Friday Night Lights-esque. Felt like a college football game. I enjoyed it.

If Baltimore called Kansas City and said, we'll give you Lamar straight up for Mahomes, you would do it? Would I get rid of my own child? Well, that was my question. Of course not. So you're with Lamar for life now? Till the end. Till the end.

Mahome is your Mahome-y for this segment, but not in Baltimore. That's right. Lamar forever. Lamar forever? Yeah. Till the end. Mahoma's your Mahoma for this segment, but not in Baltimore. That's right. Lamar forever. Lamar forever. Yeah. There you go. Well, State Farm, you can also count on. State Farm, talk to an agent today.

Time for number three. Number three, a shared passion of ours and everyone here at The Ringer, Danny Dimes. But this isn't about Danny Dimes. This is about someone playing with Danny Dimes. Golden Tate back from the PED suspension Oh They're all out of a system What can Golden Tate

Next up Ballers King It would have been a great Ballers plot Do you remember his excuse Don't rule it out we have two episodes left Fertility Oh The Rock

Well The Rock solved his fertility and painkiller treatments off the show. Not in an episode. We just assume it happened. Solved them while battling the injustice in the NCAA system, folks.

Right before he bought the Chiefs. What a show. Can there be another show like this? Can they do a show about like a digital multimedia company

where shit like this happens every week? There was a small part of me watching this season of Ballers that thought the eSports plot was like, are they going to go with a spinoff here? Well, I was thinking. Like Joe and the eSports. Or was an eSports thing playing them? Because you can't ever trust Ballers. Every cameo feels like there's some sort of financial angle for the producers.

I mean, great recurring look here for League of Legends. No doubt. So, Golden T recurring look here for League of Legends. No doubt. So, Golden Tate. Ballers. Ballers. Five years. It's amazing. It's amazing.

I'll miss it. I really will. It's terrible. I watch every episode. It's been a... I hope it comes back as typers. Meaningful part of our lives. No, you need...

This is your... This is how you bring all your ideas together. This is the aggregators. The people... The aggregators. The aggregators. The aggregators. They're at a WeWork in Brooklyn.

For your save and takes. So the Giants host the Vikings. The Vikings right now, they could be their own 30-minute discussion. They're a mess. The Cousins situation is a mess. Dylan saying we need to be able to pass at some point. Diggs not, you know, ruling out that maybe there were some murmurs

of a trade, even though he said he didn't ask for one. And on the other side, we have a team where everything seems to be clicking, folks. Now, yes, Saquon Barkley is still out. Of course, that's a big deal. I think we see him this weekend.

What? Did you say he, he was like, don't rule me out. Well, have you seen the guy's legs? I have. It's like, they're gigantic. It's, he was like, don't rule me out. Well, have you seen the guy's legs? I have. It's like, they're gigantic. It's like ruling out like the grand Canyon or the Niagara falls.

Like he's one of the eight wonders. That would be incredible. If Saquon came back that quickly and we got the return of golden Tate Saquon back in the offense, Wayne Goldman looked really good last week. Pride of Clemson. It's all clicking for dimes. Someone picked up dimes in my league and nobody made fun of them.

I mean, he's got to be owned. He's like, I'm stepping in on dimes. He's like, okay. He's got to be owned. Kind of jealous that you have dimes. He's not one of the 18 quarterbacks that you're hoarding on your roster? I'm down to two.

What? Lamar's my guy. I needed to show Lamar that I believed in him. Baker's his backup. That's it. I'm good. Loyalty.

I love it. Incredible stuff. Like Lamar, you've been my guy all year. You're still my guy. Golden Tate, the Giants guy, has not played

for the Giants, obviously. If you'll recall the bizarre nature of him joining the New York football Giants, it was, basically felt like seconds after they traded Odell.

A day later, they sign Golden Tate. He's suspended. Hasn't played yet. And the team that he is rejoining is just drastically different from the one that he thought he was going to be a part of. And he hasn't been able to practice.

Kyle, are you sick? No, it's a sneeze. Don't do this, Sidi. I'm not sick. Plague season at the ringer already. Kyle, I feel like I might have started it. Yeah, your patience is zero this time. No, Zoe Simmons was, but anyway. I think that Golden Tate, whether he or Shepard is the ultimate 1A in the offense,

remains to be seen, and maybe that's going to be En it seems like he and he and dimes have a great connection but that kind of player golden tate is huge for a young quarterback because third and eight target monster and he's a yak machine no one in football is better at generating yards after the catch literally no one than golden tate so for for Daniel Jones, in a moment of desperation, indecision, to be able to just say, I got a short little out here to my dude Golden Tate, and he's going to make the rest happen, that just feels like the kind of thing that could help him really elevate his confidence in his game even further.

And as our colleague Danny Heifetz noted on Danacy this week, the thing that really stands out about Daniel Jones isn't anything he does exceptionally well. It's the absence of things that he does exceptionally poorly. Yeah, he doesn't have like those Matt Ryan rolling out to his left and suddenly it just looks like he doesn't have coordination in his body. I started crying talking about Matt Ryan. The same team that I drafted Melvin Gordon on, by the way,

I have Matt Ryan in the debacle. This is weird, but Dimes is just like coordinated. Poised. He moves around in a very like fluid way. The Vikings defense is obviously a huge test. Everything that we said about them being a mess is specific to the offense and the... Omens here.

The plan on offense, the defense, and particularly the defensive backfield is exceptional. So having to face Harrison Smith, Xavier Rhodes, that's a real challenge. It's a stay-away gambling game. So having Tate back for that game in particular

could be huge. Excited to see it. It's funny, though. If Terrell Owens once back in the day was complaining about McNabb and everyone's like, what a fucking dick. Bad teammate. By the way, he was a bad teammate. But oh my God, you don't do that. And Thielen did basically the same thing with Kirk Cousins.

He was just like, in so many words, he's like, I'm open. This sucks. This guy blows. At some point, you got to be able to throw the ball. I was open by four yards, and he missed me on a 50-yarder. I drafted myself in fantasy, and I'm getting killed. This is bullshit. And then Stefan Diggs was basically going, all right, if there are trade rumors, great.

There's some truth to everything. Maybe there's some truth to everything. Maybe there's some truth. Sounds good. Yeah. That was brutal. That was tough. Now those two guys know how Washington Redskins fans felt for four years.

And we have Redskins fans in our universe, all of whom were like, I'll drive them to the airport. Please go. Great segue here into number two. Yeah. If you'd like to just keep it moving here. Let's do it. Hot seat watch. Oh. Does Jay Gruden survive the weekend? report please go great segue here into number two yeah you'd like to just keep it moving here let's do it hot seat watch oh does jay gritton survive the weekend so i think they would have it's time to be talking about this i think they would have fired him last weekend but they knew the 50 to

nothing beatdown was coming so they'll do it after this game right who are they playing i'll let you say it the pats they're coming up a million dollar picks they're playing the new england patriots uh the washington redskins have not won a football game this season and are a complete mess. And they have a chance to lose this game in mortifying fashion. Going against the best defense in the league when they have the most discombobulated offense in the league. Injuries compounding the total lack of anything resembling a cohesive plan. Now, last week we talked about the Dwayne Haskins case Keenum conundrum. I thought it made sense to put Haskins in. I still think it was the right call. That's what ended up happening, even though

he played poorly, does not look ready. I still think it was the right call. You have nothing to lose if you're J. Gruden other than games and your job. Both of which you're going to lose anyway. Put him out there. See what you have. I wouldn't play him in this game. The Pats defense could have 50 fantasy points in this game if he plays.

I'm talking about the rationale for putting him in last week. I agree. Putting him out this week would be... I didn't like doing it last week either because if you're going to play him, play him. Don't be like, if Case Keenum sucks again, then I'll put him in because the odds are Case Keenum was going to suck. He had no weapons. Right.

The thing with... Well, right, because McLaren's out. McLaren was out. Adrian Peterson is Adrian Peterson. I mean, come on. McLaren's out. McLaren was out. Adrian Peterson is Adrian Peterson. I mean, come on. They just had nobody. I picked up that guy, Paul Richardson, in one of my fantasy leagues, and the guy had like two catches for six yards.

Yes. They just had nobody. The thing that they also don't have, though, is anything, again, resembling like a strategy because when Gruden's asked this week, okay, well, what's the plan? What did he say? He said, we don't have one right now. Like, you can't say that out loud

if you're the head coach of a football team in the NFL. You just can't. House was in on this from the get-go because when Trent Williams held out and it became clear that they were just going to just stare at him. Still holding out, by the way. Yeah, and House was like, if he's not going to play, they're throwing away the season.

This is basically their way of tanking. Right. They should have traded him. Could they have gotten what Houston gave up for Tunsil? I don't think they would have gotten that much because there's a five-year age difference, but I think somebody would have given up a first-round pick for him. Certainly could have gotten a good return for him.

And instead they're getting nothing from him. He's just holding out. It's absolutely idiotic. The way that the franchise has run has obviously been utterly confounding for many, many, many years. And a delight to you. Well, you know, I as a life rule root against Washington team. So, right.

Certainly true. But if you think back to last year, the comp would have been Hugh Jackson and it was just inevitable. It was every minute of his tenure was leading up to the conclusion of his tenure. And that was October 29th. So we're still weeks away from what would feel like the moment in time where it was possible for a coach to be severed. But it just feels like things are so bleak in Washington that the end is here. Well, so next week they are playing the Dolphins in Miami. Early tank bowl.

Well, but that's also a case if you're going to change coaches, you want to do it there because you might actually win that game. Favorable circumstances heading into the Dolphins game. And then House and I are going to talk about the Nats-Redskins thing when we do Million Dollar Picks, but everyone in Washington just cares about the Nationals right now, especially if they take a little lead against the Dodgers. That's when you fire your coach.

Right. When there's a distraction. Yeah, when are the Red Sox fired Dombrowski? The weekend the Pats got Antonio Brown. They're like, Sunday night, midnight. By the way, we fired Dave Dombrowski. That's right. Nobody cared.

The Jonathan Allen quote from a couple weeks ago, and again, things have only gotten worse since then, not better, was, there ain't no magic sauce to get this thing turned around. And that's exactly right. There's no magic sauce. At some point, you just actually have to make a meaningful change. It's amazing how long Jay Gruden has been there. It really is. Move on.

And again, to be clear, not rooting for anybody to lose a job ever, but it has just reached the moment of inevitability. Go join the Raiders. Work with your bro, right? I think it would be fascinating to see who the Redskins elevated to interim, given the people who are on that staff. Is it going to be Bill Callahan? Is it going to be Matt Kavanaugh? Like, what are we going to see?

We could get more Bill Callahan. He was terrible. I mean, he's assistant and coach. That'd be great. I vote for that. So that would be also just fascinating. Let's go to number one. Number one. Are the San Francisco

49ers legit? I think this is the week where we need to start really asking these questions. They're hosting the Browns on Monday Night Football, coming off a bye. They're 3-0 and are one of only three remaining undefeated teams. You know who the other two are. They're the Chiefs and the Patriots. I know those teams the other two are. They're the Chiefs and the Patriots.

I know those teams. You do. People talk about the Chiefs and the Patriots all the time. We're not talking about the Niners in that same conversation. We're not. We haven't been. And I think this is the week that determines whether we should be. Andrew Wallace sent me an email.

Jimmy G is 20-1 for MVP. Is there a world in which the Niners go 12-4? He has 4,000-plus yards passing, 35-plus yards TDs, and if so, wouldn't he have to be in the conversation, especially because they sucked last year without him? Interesting. I mean, I think Mahomes is the MVP,

but the way that you have a 1-3 chance of a quarterback getting hurt, who knows? You mispronounced Lamar. That was weird. But I think Garoppolo, at least right now, is throwing too many interceptions. I don't see it, but I like the case. Yeah.

I mean, completing 70% of his passes. He is a microcosm for the entire team, which is to say they're highly productive and generally pretty impressive, but every now and then befuddling. So they're sloppy. You know, they're leading the league and turnover's lost. Well, their schedule. So they got Cleveland this week at the Rams. That's tough. At Washington, home Carolina, at Arizona.

Home Seattle, at Arizona. So it's only a couple of like really tough ones in there. And I think this I'm with you. Like this is, I think for both of these teams, totally, but that says like, we are going to come out of this game specifically and be like,

okay, now we know there's a compounding effect there and how they inform each other. Right. Because the Browns coming off, um, just destroying a thing that happened. We don't need to go into it.

It's really related. Let's not live in the past. Let's live in the future. But the Browns had the result that they had last week. And now everybody's back in on the Browns hype. That machine is churning again. So if the Niners continue to win and perform well, now that people are again looking favorably on the Browns,

that then helps generate more Niners hype moving forward. And then, you know, you look at something specific. I mean, their defensive line is just exceptional. And Kittle, I think people think he's having a bad year just because he hasn't been generating fantasy points at the level that people grew accustomed to last year. But he's PFF's highest graded player, period. Like, at any position. I mean, he's just doing incredible things on the football

field the way that he's blocking in the run game the way that they're deploying him in various respects is he had two touchdowns in week one they got called back yeah bad that's like people are keeping track of that stat now of like yards and TDs called back because like the guy Ronald Jones on the Bucks had the same thing he had a couple called back last week those kiddo ones in week one were brutal I think a lot of people drafted him in like

the second round and were like what the fuck also he had big celebrations for each one not realizing he's awesome so this is it

we find out and we're looking right now at the NFC on the whole and saying who's the team who's the elite team is it the Saints

is it the Cowboys is it the Packers could it be the Rams if you know Jared Goff stops fumbling maybe it it the Packers? Could it be the Rams if, you know, Jared Goff stops fumbling? It's funny, there's a lot of... Maybe it's the Niners.

There's a lot of B-plus teams and they're one of many possibles. I don't really love anybody in the NFC, do you? I think we need a few more weeks to see... Everyone's got a flaw, right?

Well, part of it is just when Breeze comes back to the Saints, what game shape he's in with the thumb injury and what they look like with him back. And in the Saints-Cowboys game, it was really interesting because it felt like the kind of game where the winner

was going to sort of earn that crown, even if it was just temporary. First game where you kind of doubted some of the Kellen Moore magic a bit, and I think, again, that's just growing pains and figuring it out. I think that he'll continue to call really smart plays and use Dak and deploy him effectively.

I still really like the Packers. The Packers and the Rams are the two that I'm kind of eyeballing. Yeah. Because I just think that Rams game last week might have been weird. They might have just not taken it seriously. We see this in football sometimes. They're huge favorites. It's a home game.

We're great at home. We'll figure it out. And then the Bucs are just going nuts. And the Bucs happen to have two of the best receivers in the league, all both playing well. And it just might have been one of those games. I don't want to give up on them yet. Do Mike Evans and Chris Godwin have anything to do with the fact that

Jared Goff has hands the size of a child's doll. Well, he had five bad plays. But then there's a case you could also make that like since Gurley, whatever the fuck's going on with him, since that started late last year, they've just not the same team. Yeah. And he was awesome for two and a half years where we all thought he was the best player in the league mid-October last year. Yeah, we're not very far removed from his massive contract extension. The McVay mastermind thing is also, you know, a conversation that is in motion because the thing that you came to expect from him, and that's not not to indicate any

doubt about his his prowess as a play caller it's more you come to expect constant innovation and evolution from a coach like that but that's the irony is he's they don't really do that that's they're kind of like saying this is what we do right you can't stop it and now teams are like actually we figured out a couple of ways to at least make it difficult for you. And they haven't done that next iteration.

I find the Goff contract discussion particularly fascinating. Me too. The idea that in a sport where everyone agrees that the one thing you can kind of never regret

is a quarterback contract. It's like, will this be the one that changes that? I mean, even if you look at a situation like Jacksonville where if Minshew continues to play this well, and the Foles contract is on the books with the dead cap hit that it carries,

and cutting him is not realistic and not playing him is not realistic given the hit, they could still trade him. You know, trade him to the Bears, right? Any number of teams who are going to need a quarterback. The Rams are Jared Goff's team for years now. Well, this is what Sal and I talked about on Sunday, that if they don't give him that contract, he's actually a fascinating trade piece

because they might just decide in week six, ah, this might not be our guy. Mm-hmm. But good one. Some good games this week. Mal, enjoy the baseball playoffs. Enjoy football. Enjoy college football.

Enjoy watching Jimmy G. Enjoy ballers. I don football. Enjoy college football. Enjoy watching Jimmy G. Enjoy ballers. I don't know how you couldn't enjoy watching Jimmy G. Enjoy succession. I will. Talk to you soon. L to the OG. All right, Joe House is here.

We're going to do million dollar picks. Last week, week four, we lost for the first week. But the good news, if there was good news, is we sniffed it out. We did not like the week. We the good news, if there was good news, is we sniffed it out. We did not like the week. We scaled back big time. We did two plus 150 three-team parlays for only 200,000 apiece. That would have won if the Rams hadn't decided to take a big fat dump in the Coliseum. But we but we came damn close only lost 400k uh still up 860 000 for the season house and we both like week five are you excited yeah uh i am excited i want to commend you on a couple of very nice uh setups that you you presented there in the first place, you talked about us being unable to sniff something out, and then you

followed up with the fact that the Rams laid a great big dump. Last week was the Uncle Ricky week, and we used a couple of his good guidance, his observations to really frame the week. We knew to be cautious. The one adage, the one instruction that Uncle Ricky gave us, never trust a fart, Bill Simmons. Right. And we tried to avoid the farts, but the farts got us. Yeah.

So I talked about Uncle Ricky's advice for turning 50, which he gave me in the late 1990s and was relevant because I turned 50 last week where he said, never pass a bathroom without going in, never leave a bathroom without going in, never leave a heart out unattended. So I sent him the link and I was like, Hey, I gave you a shout in the pod. You got to listen to it. Listen to it. He texted me back. You forgot number three, never trust a fart. And we, we didn't trust the fart last week. We scaled back. Arguably we should have just not bet anything, but that's not fun. But the good news is we didn't lose that much. And now we really like this week. But before we get into this week, wanted to mention the Washington Nationals, your favorite

baseball team, winning the wild card. Now heading into the ALDS, the Ewing Theory Committee has been looking at them all year. They've been studying the application since Bryce Harper, media created superstars, never actually won anything. He leaves. You might be better off. There's a major Ewing theory case in less than a minute. Can you describe your feelings on this? Yeah. And in fact, it's not, we might be better off. We are better off. Juan Soto is better than Bryce Harper. That's not even a hot take. That's the take.

Juan Soto is better than Bryce Harper right now as a 20-year-old. And this Nats team has been extremely endearing after correcting course. They started off their first 50 games 19 and31 because of a historically bad bullpen, which still hasn't really been saved. But an enormously likable group of guys. I've enjoyed rooting for this team. I believe the high watermark of the season was that come-from-behind win against the Brewers that really captured the entire spirit of the team

this whole season. They managed to score three runs on a hit batsman, a Ryan Zimmerman, the OG, you know, broke, breaking a bat bloop out into just over the second baseman's head. And then our young stud,

super duper, super, super duper star, Juan Soto, ripping a single down the right field line that scared the right. This is more than a minute that he let the ball go by. This Nats team is fun and they're going to lose to the Dodgers. ripping a single down the right field line that scared the right fielder so much that he let the ball go by. This Nats team is fun,

and they're going to lose to the Dodgers. Well, you're 5-1 to win the NL pennant. That seems low. Feels like you should be like 10-1, right? Yeah, 10-1 I would step in. 5-1, that's not enough juice. Jesus. Well, I was happy for you.

I know how much Juan Soto means to you. You've been on him from the get-go. He's your Ovechkin for your baseball team. You have no Ovechkin for your basketball team, unfortunately. I have not been able to find you one. Is there a basketball team? I don't think there's a basketball team here. You definitely don't have your Ovechkin for the football team,

which leads me to week five. Well, that was speaking of farts. How did we miss out on the Giants and Danny Dimes up against the stink-tastic Gruden deadskins? Something I'm very proud of, of how we fanned a million dollar picks this year,

we've avoided putting money on bad teams. We tried. We have definitely avoided bad team versus bad team. Just as a strategy, we have not put bad QBs in teases. Some could argue Jared Goff is a bad QB. He did throw for 500 yards in that game, but made five terrible throws. You could also argue their defense was a bigger problem in that game than Jared Goff.

I thought they were both terrible. But the Redskins are in action this week. They're playing the Patriots of New England. The game is in Washington. And I'm going to say, Matthew Barry predicted a little bit earlier. He was on, by the way, earlier, who also loves the Redskins.

Shouts Matthew. He thought this game had 59 to nothing potential, much like 12 years ago when the Patriots beat the Redskins 59 to nothing. I think they did. He was saying half-full stadium with mostly mass holes, Boston transplants, living in DC, getting tickets from people they know, or just buying them on SeatGeek or wherever at the last minute. And he was saying this had

the potential to be a massacre. So my question for you, the Pats are favored by 15 and a half. We could tease them down to nine and a half. So all they would have to do is win by 10, 10 double figures. They beat the Redskins by double figures. We cover that one. And then we rip into the teaser basket and try to find our second team. Why wouldn't we do that? We have to do that.

That is an absolute must. The sage Matthew Barry is on point. Once again, if FedEx field is half full, it'll be a miracle. Every one of those human beings, save for the 10 remaining dead skin aficionados are going to be mass holes. Our mutual pal, Kevin Brady is here in DC. All I've heard from all week are people from new England that are coming into town to go out to the FedEx joint. Are you crying? It sounds like you've just broken up.

What happened? I need a drink of water. Jesus. Are you dying? What's happening? I'm going to drink water on air. The Redskins are going to kill you. I was going to ask Kyle if I could take a break,

but I forgot that Kyle's a c**t. So I'm not going to do that. I'm not going to do that. I'm just going to take a sip of water on air. Well, there's one other fun wrinkle for this Redskins game. It starts at 1 o'clock. Oh, Iins game. It starts at 1 o'clock. Oh, I better know. It starts at 1 o'clock East Coast time.

I was hoping the Nationals game would go head-to-head just so that the indifference of Washington sports fans would be 100% instead of 90%. Unfortunately, that game is not until 7.45 your time. So conceivably, somebody could go to the Redskins game, leave, and then go to the Nats game because that's going to be game three against the Dodgers. My guess is nobody's going to do that

and people are going to avoid the Redskins game and just watch the Nationals game or go to it. But I do like that wrinkle of kind of, it's kind of the before and after picture. The Redskins game is the before picture where the person's 380 pounds, and then the Nationals game is that person lost.

He got down to 180, and he's in great shape. Isn't this great? It feels like a challenge. It feels like you're just throwing down the gauntlet at Dan Steinberg. I mean, this is right up his alley. DC Sports Bug. Oh, going to both?

Well, just getting those pictures and putting them side by side. I mean, that's his lane. He owns that corner here in DC. I'm sorry, Dan Steinberg. I didn't mean to get on your lane. No, no. I mean, I'm sure he would welcome the challenge. So here's the thing with the Dodgers, just so you know.

The Dodger fans are definitely wounded. They've had a rough decade. Their guard is up. This is a team that, if you can go in there and win game one or game two, their fans are going to get

really nervous. And if you can come back to Washington 1-1 or even up to nothing by some miracle, the Dodger fan base will be freaking the fuck out. So just keep that in mind. There's been a lot of damage. I would certainly enjoy that.

A lot of damage. I mean, this Nats team has nothing to lose. This is a great position, a rare position for a Washington team. No expectations whatsoever. So just let it all hang out. And it's all kids. They don't give, they give zero Fs. The case against the Pats is that they're pretty banged up, including the fact that we have a new field goal kicker, Gostkowski. The run is finally over after a million years. I've had two kickers in my life since 1996, when I was an unemployed bartender living in Charlestown, Massachusetts,

and you would come to visit me. That's how long it was. We both had more girlfriends than that. Yeah, we had. And we've been married for a long time. Yeah, I was years away from meeting my wife. You were not close to me to your wife either. Not close.

This was a long time ago. I've had two kickers, and now this will be my your wife either. Not close. This was a long time ago. I've had two kickers and now this will be my third kicker. But I think the defense wins this game by itself. I don't know what the Redskins do offensively. Haskins, they threw in last week

and it was a predictable nightmare. He could not have looked worse. I don't know why they did it. And now nobody even knows who their QB is going to be, but either way, it's going to be bad. And I think the defense covers 10 points by itself, much less

whatever the Pat's offense. So, the question is, who is our teaser team? Who do we put them with? The nominees are... Let me hear your candidates. Hold on. I'm going to reach into the teaser basket. Okay, good.

Okay. I've just pulled out the Vikings minus five at the New York football Giants. I'm throwing that back. No. Bad. No, no, no. Bad teaser basket. No.

No, thank you. Not betting on Kirk Cousins. Go away. Never. We're not doing it. You can't talk me into it. The next one would be teasing the Falcons, who are plus five in Houston, teasing them to plus 11,

saying these are two kind of weird, bad teams that can't totally stay out of their own way. Houston can't block. Atlanta just screws up in a variety of ways. This feels like an anything-can-happen game. I'm throwing that one back as well. I don't trust Matt Ryan. I don't trust the Falcons and I'm not going near that one.

The third one. Do you have any comment, Matt Ryan sarcastic Matt Ryan comment before I keep going? No, I mean, Dan Ryan and Jake Rudin in the XFL Super Bowl is going to be terrific. Dan Quinn, you mean? What did I say, Dan? Yeah, Dan Ryan.

I like Dan Ryan. Dan Ryan will be bad too. Well, Matt Ryan could be his offensive coordinator. Teaser basket number three. Wow. Sick house. This is like. Not on mic.

This is a glimpse into our future when we're just 70 old guys. Forget you're calling guys the wrong names and coughing to the mic. I'm probably wheezing. I took the mic away. Okay, third one. Chargers at home minus six against Denver. I'm throwing this back for a variety of reasons, including it looks too easy on paper. I don't trust the Chargers.

No. The Denver is hung around in their games, even though they have their own four. It's a slightly deceiving own four. Yeah. Fanny pack Fangio just needed a month to get his, his, his fanny pack in the right position.

Yeah. I don't, I don't have what I'm worried about. I don't have a feeling either way, but I will tell you this, there will be a lot of Denver fans at that game. And I don't like that. Yeah.

So that leaves us with the Bears of Chicago laying five and a half points in the beautiful country of England in London playing the Raiders. It's enticing

for a couple reasons. One is that Mitch Trubisky's not playing. We're getting chased Daniel. Yeah. I'm old school. I like when my quarterback can throw a football in a straight line to the person trying to catch it.

It's just one of my weird quirks. So I like that. I think Oakland, it's a little deceiving because they look good last week against Indy. That Indy team was really banged up. The Colts have been great to us. We even threw them in a parlay last week, just out of respect, out of all the money they made us. Just that it was a respectful move. And the Raiders look pretty good. The Colts, they have the 31st defense in DVOA now. They've had injuries, don't really have a pass rush. And it's starting to, I'm starting to get worried about my Colts

but I like it because it's helped this line because I think the Bears have an awesome defense and to go from playing against that Colts defense where man Derek Carr looks good this week oh man look at him getting rid of the ball Josh Jacobs to this Bears defense

which along with the Patriots defense these are really like A-plus defenses out there. And I just don't think the Raiders are going to be able to move the ball. So Chase Daniel and whatever running game they get out of it, the London crowd, all that stuff, that's fine.

But I think the defense wins this one too. What are your thoughts? Well, I'm right there with you. First of all, shout out to Chase Daniel. One-time dead skin. I always loved him and wondered why we didn't see more of him. He's a perfect backup, but we've seen a lot of backups get quasi-starter jobs. I feel very comfortable with Chase behind the ball, but the point you made is the right one. This is a defense. The Chicago Bears defense is the reason to be excited about the Bears.

There are a couple trends here also that I'm going to mention, but Khalil Mack revenge game. This is Khalil Mack against Gruden. We like that. Under John Gruden, the Raiders are 0-5

against the spread coming off a win. We like that. That's a good trend. My good buddy Big Al McMorty sent me this nugget. NFL teams, this is the Raiders' third consecutive game away from home. Not a very good trend for that one. NFL teams in that spot are like 76 and 125.

I don't think that's a good number. And I'll tell you this. As somebody who's gone from LA to London or California from London, it's 11 hours away. It's long and you don't feel right for like three days. East Coast is six hours.

Right. West Coast it's hours. Right. West Coast, it's 11. It's not fun. It's a really long, long ride and you don't feel right for a while. So throwing that out there too. Well, and that's another one. A shout out to my boy. I shouted him out last week, R.J. White

from CBS Sports. He makes this point. Teams from the West, they're going to London. They're one and five against the spread. Oh, wow. They're playing against a team from the Central or Eastern time zones. So there you go. There's your stat.

Covers the Bill Simmons angle. Great. We love the Bears. I love the Bears. The Bears are my five-star play this week, in fact. So we'll do Bears-Pats-Tees. Yes. And feel great about that.

And if you're not so beloved, dead skin, screw that up. I'm going to be mad at everybody. There are four underdogs that I like this week, which makes me happy to no end because I know that it's a good week for me when there are underdogs that I like. And I have four.

I know you have a couple too. What's your final list of underdogs you like? Just that don't list the teams, just what number is it? How many? I have three that I like. Okay. Well, let's go through them.

First, the Jaguars still weirdly undervalued, and I don't understand it. They are getting three and a half points at Carolina this week. Carolina had a lot of trouble moving the ball last week against Houston. I wouldn't say Houston's

an awesome defense, but they really struggled. And they're very, very McCaffrey-centric. I actually think there's a chance that Jags are just undervalued in general. The Jalen Ramsey thing threw them off, threw betters off. And they had a weird vibe. Did well on a Thursday night.

Nice come from behind win last week. More importantly, our man G Minshew, which we were there for the formative stages of G way back when. And we were together in Washington, D.C. watching G coming through. And now I feel like this is now a thing. People are now comparing this to Linsanity. They're calling it Minsanity.

Things like that. I don't like that. I gotta say, I'm all in. I think he's legit good. I think the reasons that he became a good quarterback or a good draft pick, sleeper, whatever, actually makes sense. This isn't somebody who, you know,

like if Kyle Bowler became good in year five or something, we'd be like, wow, that's weird. We'd kind of decided on him. Or somebody who you draft in the fourth round and you just kind of know isn't good right away. Yeah, I mean like Fitz magic, like Brian Fitzpatrick, what was there to ever suggest that he was going to be? Yeah. It's if it's gonna, if it's going to be an out of nowhere guy, it's usually somebody with a really weird story. It's Kurt Warner, you know, like working a nine to five job for two years and being an arena football guy and it's shit like that. And this

guy has a weird story. He's a late bloomer. He's never really had a chance, but he carries himself like a QB. I think he can absolutely win on the road. I like the fact that these Carolina and Jacksonville are close to each other, just from a proximity standpoint.

I don't feel like there's much of a home field advantage in Carolina, by the way. Oh, Tate Frazier's going to be mad at you. They banged that drum. Steph Curry banged that drum before. Well, they can take that drum and go stick it. And, you know, I just think they can go in there and win. And as we've seen this year, especially in football,

home field matters less than ever. I mean, the road teams are something like 25 or 15 games over 500 so far this year. i like that one what are your thoughts i like it as well uh and one aspect of the g minshu phenomena that i've particularly enjoyed of late is the uncle rico the reintroduction of uncle rico into our lives from napoleon dynamite quarterback now he could throw the ball over a mountain. And I absolutely believe the same is true of, of a G Minshew. I'm calling him uncle Rico Minshew.

And I don't care. I can't come up with a reason. We all we've done since he's appeared on the scene is bet the Jags. And all they do is cover every week. As long as G's got the ball in his hands. So let's keep doing that. Let's keep doing that thing. Bill Simmons. Road teams are 39, 21 and one against the spread this year house. That's pretty crazy. And, uh, I, I, I just think the Jags have a better team.

That's where I'm laying in that one. So let's file that one away. We're going to put some action on that one. I believe in the Jags defense actually. And I think they got for an echoing last week. People have been waiting for this forever. You believe in four net? Sure. I mean, it's, it's, it's the right, he's clearly a guy that needs, um, the circumstances to, to build it. Cause he just runs downhill. He only runs one way, but they, they, they finally seem to have, you know, I mean, against a Denver defense that you would have expected would be good against the run. And this is part of the puzzling thing with the Fanny Pack Fangios.

He just ran straight downhill all game long and they couldn't stop him. And Bradley Chubb got hurt during that game. You know why he got hurt? Because there could only be one Chubb. Nick Chubb took his Chubb mojo. He was like, I'm Chubb now. You can't be Chubb anymore. So Bradley Chubb gets hurt. You said you

have two underdogs. Give me one of your two underdogs. I want to see if it matches my list. Do you want me to say the team, the game? What do you want me to say? Just give me one underdog and the point spread that you like. I like the Green Bay Packers getting three and a half points against the Dallas Cowboys. They're on my list.

I mean, speaking of wet farts last week, and we had a little discussion about Dallas against New Orleans, and I watched all of that Dallas-New Orleans game. I thought Dallas was in a different class. It was a class game as far as I was concerned. And then Dallas went in there and got their asses pushed all over the place on both sides of the ball. The New Orleans Saints, after giving up over 500 yards of offense

the previous week to the Seattle Seahawks. I want to call them the Supersonics now because of you have that great podcast series going. Yeah. But but the Hawks came in and just owned the line. New Orleans won the football game without scoring a touchdown, which tells you all you need to know. Dallas offensive. It shows.

What did I say? Yeah. Now you're I was just fixing it. Yeah. Yeah. Offensive touch. It shows... What did I say? Yeah, no, I was just fixing it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sorry. But... So you go back and you say, well, all the...

The three Dallas wins are garbage now. They beat the 0-4 Deadskins. They beat the 2-2 Giants when they had Eli. Yeah. And they beat the 0-4... Who am I forgetting? They beat all bad teams.

We get your, they beat all bad teams. So the other thing that stuck out in that game was it felt like they were out coached. It felt like they were out. Thank you. Thank you. Thought,

especially the saints defense, some of the stuff they were doing. And it just, the saints were a step ahead of them the whole game. And that's why, one of the reasons I like the Packers because, you know, the, the reality with the Packers is they kind of blew that Philly game Thursday night. You know, Adams got hurt, had to come out when he was just killing the Eagles. And then they had the ball, you know, inside the red zone and just did some weird shit

and ended up, I thought they were going to tie the game. They were in that game. The Eagles played really well, credit to them. But, you know, the Packers easily could be undefeated still. And I just think they're better than Dallas. The catch is their run defense has not been good this year, and everybody is on the fact of Dallas is just going to pound Zeke, pound, pound, pound, pound,

and this has the makings of like a 200-yard Zeke game. Are you worried about that? Well, sure, and he just had his worst game possibly as a professional last week against the Saints. The other thing that's concerning for Green Bay, two injuries. Devontae Parker may be out with turf toe and more concerning. Devontae Adams? God damn it.

This is just going to be this way. It's just this show. Well, you're sick. Now at this point, I really am. I didn't realize how sick. This is the first time I've talked to an adult all day today. So far, I'd only been speaking with my child, my nine-year-old. Yeah.

So it's not surprising that my capture of the facts is a little suspect so far today. Anyway, Brian Beluga and Devontae Adams, both questionable, both, it seems at this stage when we're having this discussion, unlikely to play. Beluga is a bigger blow to me. They're saying Adams is... Bulaga. No, but they're saying Adams is probably not playing. I just feel like we're going to see him. But yeah, I think that's what, that's at least the reason why this line is in Dallas by three.

That's, this is why you're getting the extra half point because people, they saw the Packers offense before and after Adams and made them a little worried. So there you go. That's definitely a reason to at least scale back on the bet. Uh, yeah,

I have two more underdogs. Well, what was your other underdog? I wonder if it's the same one I have. Hmm on give me one second here oh it's the colts and and it's a it's a just out of continued respect for the colts um and and really respect for frank reich after getting their ass kicked last week uh by the raiders i like the idea what well they got their ass kicked last week by the Raiders. I like the idea. What? Well, they got their ass kicked,

but they also had a chance to win the game. It was an amazing hang around performance where they just kind of kept clawing back. And then finally, finally they succumbed. But they never quit in that game, which I liked. Yeah. The reason I like the Colts in this position getting 11 is what I think it is. Yes.

It's simply that game plan wise, Marlon Mack is going to get 573 touches. Did I say his name right? Is that his name? Is that actually the name? Marlon Mack. You got it. You nailed it. I got the name right.

Unbelievable. The Chiefs have the worst run defense in the league. And so that's how this can be something less than. I mean, you could still win the bet and lose by 10 points. So at this stage, it feels slightly disrespectful to how spunky the Colts have been. And we got like an extra handful of points out of it because of what the Colts just did against the Raiders. So obviously I gravitated to this line, like moth to flame. And here's what worries me. The chiefs have the best offense in the league, and I'm not even sure it's close. They're number one by DVOA. Even last week where it really felt like the lions had their number

in a lot of different ways, they still got to 34 points and would have had more if a receiver hadn't gotten a potential almost touchdown get punched out of his hand. They'd settle for a field goal in that play. Indy's got the 31st defense on DVOA. And that includes the two starters that they lost two weeks ago, Leonard and Hooker. I'm not sure the defense was that great anyway. What alarmed me last week about them was they just couldn't get pressure on Carr. Right.

And if they don't get pressure on Mahomes, which I don't think they will, I just don't see a scenario where the Chiefs don't put up 40 points in this game. If anything, you could talk me into, if you're going to do the Colts, you almost want to do like Colts with the over or something like that. The over for this game is 56. And God, it feels like the Chiefs are good for 40 of that. I'd be really surprised if they didn't put up a big, big, big game, especially coming off like the Lions where Mahomes wasn't great in that game. They really had to gut it out. And now this game, you know, it's a Sunday night or two.

Mahomes is making his MVP candidacy. So I think I'm staying away from this one house as much as I love the Colts. I think just for this week, we're pressing the pause button on them. Okay. I'm just telling you, you asked me for my other underdog Colts, I think just for this week, we're pressing the pause button on them. Okay. I'm just telling you, you asked me for my other underdog. No, I know. And I really thought about it and considered it, and I wanted it. I love the Colts this year.

T.Y.'s back at practice, too. T.Y.'s back. I don't know. Do we trust that? Do we not trust that? Now, if T.Y.'s back, maybe they could just match points with them. That's the other thing. Could this just be like a 48-40

type game? So maybe the move is maybe do Colts. Maybe we could do a little on Colts in the over as a parlay. That's fun. Just to keep paying our respects. A little tiny one.

So we could also do Colts with the over, which is plus 950. Basically, we're saying 10 to 1 chance the Colts win an absolute shootout. Might be worth a little something. Possibly. Just out of respect. We'll come back to that.

We'll come back to that one. Before we keep going, I wanted to mention FanDuel. We're teaming up with FanD back to that. We'll come back to that one. Before we keep going, I wanted to mention FanDuel. We're teaming up with FanDuel to give you a chance to play fantasy football against Misa on the trifecta. The best part,

the winner gets to fly out to Puerto Rico to be our official correspondent for FanDuel's World Fantasy Championship live finals. All expenses paid, four days worth of events

in Puerto Rico, including an exclusive beach after party with live performance by Ludacris. Go to FanDuel.com slash ringer to enter and draft your week five fantasy team before the games kick off on Sunday. This is a good time to mention that there are probably

some Colts and Chiefs in my lineup. Just putting that out there. You could say Mr. Mahomes looks enticing, as always. Marlon Mack looks enticing. Return at TY. Travis Kelsey coming off being double teamed all game against the Lions. He might be in the lineup as well. So you got that as well.

All right. Two more underdogs I wanted to mention. Tampa is getting three in New Orleans. From a DVOA standpoint, this is a bargain. Because Tampa right now, 10th offense, 6th defense. It's early for DVOA, but we do have enough of a sample size that we got to start at least taking a little bit seriously. The pressure they were getting on Goff last week was unreal. And I don't know what this Shaq Barrett, I don't know what the hell happened with this. This guy was on Denver the last couple of years.

He now looks like he's Lawrence Taylor. They were all over the place. Their defense, the Todd Bowles, mixing up the blitzes with faking stuff, and they're just very, very, very frisky on D. And then, offensively, Godwin and Evans.

That's probably the best receiver combo right now. Both of those guys, who, of course, happen to be on my fantasy team. Jameis, they got going. And the Saints, I gotta say, I just don't think Teddy Bridgewater is good. I feel bad saying it, but I thought the Saints should have

won that game by 20 points on Sunday night. And he just couldn't do anything. He's really limited. What do you think? Well, you're absolutely right about that um but they have now beat two teams that you know as you sort of sit down and look at um the season coming in are the Seahawks and the Cowboys on the short list of potential playoff teams yes you would say that and Drew Brees didn't play one snap in either one of those games

right and they went into Seattle and beat that team's butt and then came home and held serve against Dallas. They're very, I just was so impressed by how they controlled the line of scrimmage on both sides of the ball. They just managed their ways into wins. It's like a really smart franchise, good head coach, and they're managing their way to wins.

Saints DVOA, 18th offensively, 24th defensively. By the way, if you want to take anyone from this game, I would encourage, I think Evans and Godwin are going to alternate this year as having awesome things. But if you want to play against me, Sal, in the trifecta, in the Ringer Listener League on FanDuel, doesn't matter if you missed last week, you can still take home the top prize.

FanDuel.com slash Ringer to enter right now. I believe in this Bucs team. I can't believe I'm saying it, but I think they're deceiving 2-0. And I actually think the Rams are a little better than maybe people thought. And the Bucs made them look worse than they probably are on Sunday. And maybe we should start taking this Bucs team seriously. I say this knowing that Jameis could throw five picks on Sunday. I am just not sold on the Saints offensively.

And I think Tampa can do enough defensively. One other thing with this game, House, you remember last year, Tampa went in there 48 to 40, beat them early. So they have confidence going in there. Cause they just won in there a year ago. I always like when the team has, you know, it's a division rival where the team has gone in there and won.

Wanted to mention them last, but not least. This is more bed against the Ravens. Steelers are plus three and a half in Baltimore, divisional game. Baltimore is the third-ranked offense, the 29th-ranked defense, and they looked abominable last week.

Pittsburgh, pretty run of the mill. 20th offensively, 19th defensively, 15th special teams, DVOA. They looked good last week against a bad Bengals team. But I guess my thing with this one is just I don't trust Baltimore's defense. And I'm not sure. They might not be good. The counter is, as John from New Jersey emailed me,

are we sure the Ravens aren't just this year's good-bad team where they use Lamar's athleticism to beat up on bad teams like the Dolphins and Cardinals, but they struggle against teams with good players like the Chiefs and the Browns? What are your thoughts on Steelers-Ravens? I agree with this. I actually like um in this position

i think that uh you did the astute observation by john is that the reader list yeah john in new jersey john in new jersey is is is absolutely on point um this showing by Baltimore, underwhelming showing the last two weeks, I think we're going to look back and say, those are kind of forgivable losses. They were in most of that game against the Chiefs. They just couldn't get one more stop when they needed it. But it wasn't just a flat-out blowout against the Chiefs.

And the Browns, this is the thing. We've been very suspicious, they, it wasn't just a flat out blowout against the chiefs and the, the, the Browns. This is the thing. Like, uh, we've been very suspicious properly of the Cleveland Browns because they still haven't, you know,

really built the institutional, the culture of winning there, but boy, do they have an up of fuck ton of talent. That's my technical analysis. Yeah. And I, I looked at them long and hard

against the Niners plus three and a half on Monday night and I just... I don't trust... I don't trust soup kitchens, unfortunately. So,

I'm going to stay away from the Steelers because I don't know if I trust the QB. I don't like that they're coming off an easy win. I agree with you. Baltimore could just win this game

by themselves offensively. But I... There's going to be a time for us to bet against Baltimore and it's probably not this week. File them away. I don't think so. Put them in the someday we're betting against you basket. Here's where we landed. Bears, Pats, Tees.

Jags plus three and a half. Are you with me on Tampa plus three or no? I'm are you with me on tampa plus three or now uh i i'm i'm kind of there with you you know one interesting thing with the saints too they have a bad uh home record against the spread over the like of recent vintage like they're two seven and one or something against the spread I think I saw somewhere at home, which is really, really weird. They can't score, so it's going to have to be Jameis

making a contribution to the good people of New Orleans to produce it. And we know that New Orleans, I mean, we know that Tampa Bay can score. So, I mean, I'm fine with it. I'm not going to talk you out of it. Okay, so here's what we're doing.

Bears-Patriots tease. We're putting half of our million dollars this week on that. 500. If we lose, we lose 550. But we're going for 500. Bears just basically have to win. Patriots have to win by 10 or more.

We win that one. Both of them have to win. We're doing that win by 10 or more. We win that one. Both of them have to win. We're doing that. We're betting on G. Minshew. Jags plus three and a half in Carolina. What do you think, 250 or 300 on that? We could go- 300.

300 on Jags plus three and a half. We're going to go 150 on Tampa plus three. Yeah. And then we left a little 50 for the Colts. So we can either do a Colts plus 11 with the over parlay for 50k.

We can do the plus 950 Colts win and the game goes over 56. What do you think? Let's be shrewd. 50 Colts win and the game goes over 56. Um, what do you think? Let's let's be shrewd. Uh, let's just take the points. They're sitting there on the table.

Let it take the points and, and, and the over put those two together. That's what, that's gotta be a, like, you know, a decent return,

right? Colts plus 11 with the over plus 56 yeah that's the parlay I'm thinking yeah that's plus 260 that's a good that's a good little that's a good little return you want to throw the Packers in there now we get getting so we'll bet 50 plus 260 on Colts plus 11 with the over 56.

So to recap, Bears, Patriots, Tees, 500K. Jags plus 3.5, 300K. Tampa plus 3, 150K. And then Colts plus 11 with the over in the Colts-Chiefs game at 56. 50 to win 130. Okay. And that's what we're doing. We're up 860 for the year.

House, good luck with the Nationals. Worst of luck with the Redskins. Talk to you soon. Don't trust that fart. Thanks to ZipCruiter. Don't forget to go to zipcruiter.com slash BS. Thanks to Luminary for running Sonic Boom as well as R Rotchables 1999,

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And you out there can go to square.com slash go slash BS to see all the ways you can take your business from square one to whatever's next. You're kind of your own business now. You run a whole bunch of podcasts.

I'm a brand. You're at a bar. Somebody might want to buy you a beer. Yes. Who knows? All right. We'll be back Sunday night, me and the cuz. Looking forward to it.

Until then. I want to see them on the way so I never say I don't have feelings with them. I want to see them on the way so I never say I don't have feelings with them.